#ted x gooch

[onscreenkisses]

And like can lead to like-like And like-like can lead to love

SCRUBS: Ted + Gooch + moments

RIP Sam Lloyd, thank you x

[ihatepeacocks]

I just don’t think the Trump Regret Voter really exists

A Rant from ihatepeacocks’ Operative X on voters who “Regret” voting for Trump aka #TrumpRegrets. Follow Operative X on Twitter for more rants and political commentary.

“I keep hearing about this magical Trump Voter who has so many regrets. They didn’t mean to do it. They feel so taken advantage of. They feel so dirty, so used. What do you do if you run into one of those supposed Trump voter-regretting, self-loathing but tardy on the ability to reason-types? Many suggest a show of compassion. Be respectful. Be conciliatory and talk them through it – help them unpack that tangled mess left behind by their logical leaps and selective listening skills which led them to believe Trump was speaking to them – you know, like God speaks to them. Others have said to be open-minded, understanding how so many regretful Trump Voters feel viscerally left behind – invisible even – in today’s evolving, seemingly ultra-PC world that they’ve quite suddenly found themselves flailing within. Do this, lest they make this mistake again. Know that Trump was for a moment, their ray of light. Be there as a shoulder to cry on, to act as that outlet like an unpaid amateur psychologist-turned-emotional tampon. I mean, c’mon – they’ve been through so much.

HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHA – NO – I’M KIDDING - FUCK THEM SIDEWAYS, DIRECTLY IN THE FUCKING EYE HOLE.

Having grown up in the sweaty gooch located behind the nut sack shadow of Dr. James Dobson and Focus on the Family, right next to the butthole of the Christian Coalition, and left of the pimple that is New Life Church (that’s you, Ted Haggard), I have zero remorse for these Conservative-ish or whatever shitheads. FUCKING ZIP. I’ve lived through their brainwashing tactics – like showing 7th graders in public schools an abortion video made by the 700 Club to curb any Pro-Choice notions – and have heard strangers openly use the N-word even just last week to repeatedly describe President Obama to me. Since I’m white, they see me as a safe zone…So I bait them, watch fervor turn to froth, then – oh boy, they get a treat when I tell them I’m a Pinko Liberal. Those facial expressions (middle-aged folk and smug college kids alike) are worth more than an Ivanka Trump nightgown covered in her Daddy’s whore-piss. These are some of the same people who relentlessly and unapologetically worship Ronald Reagan daily and still go all Nancy-style holding campy séances to contact the Gipper. To them he’s Grandpa Jesus and their kinky Santa Claus lover all in one. These are people who have no remorse, no empathy, who show up to Church semi-often to get phony absolution, only to then speed out of the parking lot and run over the nearest convenient non-white person while shouting “I’m saved!” So for that crop of Trump advocates out there – give ‘em credit for being publicly stupid. At least they stick to their guns (literally).

But here’s the real bullshit – I’ve yet to meet, hear from, or see an actual Trump Regretter in the wild. Are they hiding in plain sight? Are they utterly ashamed phantoms? Nope. These are prideful people. I just don’t think the Trump Regret Voter really exists, at least in any sizable quantity. Yes, there are a few anonymous shit-posters, sure, but not like they’re out there populating marches. A few hundred do not a movement make. They are actually a red herring to make us lefties feel steroid-rage justified in hating this election result even more and thus installing something convenient to blame. They are an ultra-small group being built up to outsized status - becoming an alternative-fact to satiate our unrelenting need to point a finger. We’re simply in serious denial that we lost…to the Russia/Trump Super Friends, no less, which makes it less palatable. Trump voters I’ve spoken with are stubborn, angry, backwards, self-righteous, self-assured, and when it comes to understanding political processes or nuance, have more fingers than IQ points. And/or, they’re smug little trolls – typically college-age or mid-20s – who think telling off a political science professor that one time is their crowning achievement in life and that being right wing (or alt-right for the truest inbred psychos) is the trendy choice. These are not people prone to second-guess themselves. Such self-reproach would demonstrate weakness or, gasp, intelligence, in their Insane Clown Posse meetings. And they can’t have that; their friends would call them liberal pussies. They might as well have been in the Women’s March! The last thing these people have is any sense of guilt, remorse, regret, whatever – or compassion for others, for that matter. Hence, their voting choice.

In real life, I’m typically accommodating (mostly). I can engage with anyone – it’s one of my talents. I really try to get to a gut check level with individual actual humans to attempt to walk in their shoes, see within their perspective and reason it out, compromise on points for argument’s sake – all to gain more perspective. Or if I dislike them, to hone my debate and negotiating skills; it’s not always an adventure in altruism. And through years of doing this, I can now see past people’s default defensive fronts and detect emotional fortitude or inexperience in a heartbeat, like being able to smell the faintest taco fart in a Class 4 Hurricane (not class 5 – I’m not a goddamned savant). Reading people is listed on my CV as a key skill. Even have that shit underlined. I often know when people are full of it before they do. It’s not always a pleasant exercise to humor them. And so I’ve tried to find these people to see what possessed them. But I and others have not yet actually seen anyone in the flesh who has said anything close to regret, or an apology, as such: “You know… I feel like a bit of an asshole for voting for Trump. I was short-sighted, and kind of flippantly, desperately said fuck it so voted for the guy because (insert self-serving justification/projection here).” And I don’t expect to; these are the type of people who tend to double-down in stubborn pigheadedness. Introspection is not a strong suit amongst this crowd.

The Trump Regretting Voter is a fantasy; a myth we want to perpetuate for our feels. So let’s get over it and stop flailing in denial, not committing ourselves to the same tired playbook of extending an olive branch with conservatives, wanting to make right, come together, reconciling with and worse trying to redeem those we view as “lost.” It’s a fucking trap. We are a starkly divided nation, and a culture war is upon us. Take a few more moments to smell the shit we’re wading in– take it in, and then awaken and stop pining for excuses like the candy-ass leftover Democratic Party Leadership which continues to reflect on why it’s getting its ass kicked time and time again by being “reasonable.” And what if you do happen to meet that purple unicorn face-to-face who says, “I was wrong about Trump”? Tell them yes, you were, and then, carefully, assess them gravely with an uncomfortably long stare …And tell them to go fuck themselves prison-style with a salt-encrusted cheese grater. They fucked us. Remind them of it, repeatedly, callously. They deserve it. After all, even if they do exist - you’re not going to save them, and you’re not going to change their minds anyway. 

Follow Operative X on Twitter for more rants and political commentary.