#technically i’ve had long hair all my life but cut it short once in middle school

[gayvampyr]

after 6 years of long hair i finally decided to chop it and it feels soo nice. might go even shorter

[pfhwrittes]

Seeing all the Cat!Dad Simon this morning is just what I needed. Cute kitties!

But it also made me realize, seeing how others found their babies, I’ve never talked about how I found my babies!

Soooo! This is Mercy, thus named for where she was found. She loves her kitty blanket.

She was found living near a hospital being raised by a fox. No one could catch her bc the fox would obviously run away when people came around and avoided traps, thus Mercy learned these things as well.

Until she got big enough that the adult fox started becoming aggressive and trying to get rid of her. So the nurses started feeding her scraps of what they would make that night. And slowly over time she became the hospital’s unofficial mascot. Everyone knew who Mercy was and loved her. But no one could take her in for one reason or another.

Insert: younger Tats who just moved out for the first into the tiny house they just finished building and had been mentioning getting a pet.

So I was bombarded with people asking me to take her in and I thought why not. So Mercy was caught, my mother sent me a pic of her cut all to pieces with a very annoyed looking young Mercy being held. Mercy was boarded at the vet until everything was settled at my house and I had all the stuff. Then she was moved into the house and been living with her ever since.

Which brings me to Peppa…

Mercy picked her out. I had nothing to do with her being chosen other than signing some paperwork. Mercy apparently bonded with her at the vets office and would get very upset if separated from her for to long.

I only knew of Peppa as the “ugly kitten no one wanted.” Because she was the only tortie in a litter of silver tabby kittens. She was also the only short hair amongst a bunch of long haired kittens. All of her siblings had been adopted or claimed and she was left at the vet.

Until Mercy decided she wanted a sibling and claimed her. Lmao.

tats! tats i LOVE this! i love that you've ended up with a Buy One Get One Free situation!

good job miss mercy for bringing miss peppa into tat's life! also, shame on the people that called peppa ugly! look at her little face! she's not ugly! she's a baaaaaaaaayyyyyybeeeeee! i love them both so much oh my god.

i'm sure i've told you all how i ended up with my creechurs but if i haven't i can!

mango i picked up as a kitten back in july 2020 after my mum and sister started getting Concerned about my Mental Health Situation during the pandemic (it was... Not Good). i say i picked mango. i did not pick mango. she scaled me like a tree to sit on my shoulder and shriek my ear. the people with the kittens asked me three times if i was sure i wanted her because they had sweeter kittens and i refused to let her go because i liked how spicy she was. some people (the people who have been scratched and bitten by her) would say that was a mistake. i say that they need to deal with the fact that mango is selective.

charlie came to live with me in november 2021. technically i only have joint custody of charlie as he does belong to one of my friends. but charlie came to live with me because my friend's middle aged cat absolutely could not stand charlie when he was a kitten and so i offered to take him so my friend could still see his boy whenever he wants. so at least once a month my friend comes over and spends the day with charlie. it's very sweet.

dolly-ollie is my most recent creechur. you are all probably aware that in febuary this year dolly-ollie was only supposed to stay with me for a few days while my sister moved house. which she did. and then my sister never picked her back up. since then some family drama has gone down so i guess dolly-ollie is staying with me forever!

[dickwheelie]

22 jonmartin omg 👁👁

this was for the prompt "grabbing the other’s hand to pull them back from something." sorry this took so long! thank you for the prompt Moss, I hope you enjoy!

____________

When Martin ascends the hill again, Jon is not there.

They had found themselves in a Vast domain, consisting mostly of gentle rolling hills which were cut at their apex with dramatic, rocky cliffs that dropped off into an endless ocean far below. For those who weren't being Watched, the place was rather pleasant, almost picturesque, and Martin had suggested it might be a nice place to rest for a bit. Jon had found a patch of grass at the top of a hill, and Martin was intending to explore a bit. Just go down to the bottom of the hill, he said. That is, if Jon didn't have a statement, because if he did, Martin wanted to be there. He didn't want a repeat of the Web theater, after all.

Jon had said no, he couldn't sense a statement here, Martin was free to go. That was what he'd said.

But of course, Martin thinks as he sees the flattened, empty patch of grass on the hillside, it can never be that easy, could it.

He doesn't begin to really worry until he looks off towards the apex of the hill.

Like a sleepwalker, or perhaps a better description would be a dead man walking, Jon is stiffly making his way up the hill towards the edge of the cliff, where the rocks simply end and drop off into the endless expanse of waves below. Martin can hear his voice droning on with someone else's words, and his eyes have a particular sheen to them that Martin has come to recognize and loathe. Martin knows he is not in control, and that he is not seeing anything in front of him.

Martin still isn't entirely sure of the rules of this new state of reality, whether it's dream logic or nightmare logic or something that makes even less sense. He does not know if he or Jon are in any danger of dying in these domains. He isn't sure if Jon is capable of dying at all anymore.

Martin doesn't take the time to consider any of that before he is running full tilt towards the cliff's edge.

"Jon!"

Jon, of course, does not heed him, and keeps walking head-on into danger. Figures, Martin thinks with bitter irony. He's never been able to resist that even while he was awake.

"Jon!"

Perhaps it is useless to yell, but Martin does it anyway. Jon's boot crunches the dirt not a meter away from the edge.

"Jon, don't--"

Finally, mere feet away, Martin catches up with him, shoes sliding through the dirt as he comes to a halt just behind him. Jon's hand is dangling senselessly at his side, with no need to carry a tape recorder anymore, and Martin grabs it and pulls, yanking him roughly back away from the precipice just before he reaches the rocks that mark its edge. Jon stumbles backwards into his arms, his limbs flailing and his droning speech stuttering, and Martin holds him fast, clutching him protectively against his chest. Even now he can feel the supernatural tug of something pulling Jon towards the cliff's edge, but Martin's arms are strong, stronger than anything else he possesses, stronger than his weak, soft heart and much stronger, he'd wager, than the Beholding's hunger.

There is a tense moment of struggle, wherein Martin can barely tell the difference between Jon's resistance and the Beholding's pull, but a few moments later Jon's voice fades and stops in the middle of a sentence, the statement left incomplete. His body goes slightly limp in Martin's arms. Martin loosens his hold and turns Jon gently around, taking his face in his hands and forcing Jon to meet his eyes. Jon's gaze darts sporadically across Martin's face, but that vague sheen from before is gone, and his eyes seem clear. "Jon?" Martin says anxiously. "Are you there?"

Jon takes a heavy breath and with his normal, wonderful voice says, "I--yes, Martin, I'm--" Martin doesn't need to hear more. He wraps his arms tightly around him, crushing him against his chest, a hand in his hair.

"It's alright," Martin tells him. "I've got you. I've got you. You're alright." He's saying it to comfort himself as much as Jon.

"Yes," Jon says weakly, muffled against his chest. His voice is hoarse, as though the statement had been more than a short monologue. "I-I'm sorry, Martin, I shouldn't have--gone off without you, I--"

"No," Martin says, guilt suddenly weighing him down like rocks against his ankles, "no, I shouldn't have left you, I--We said, didn't we, we said we'd stay together, we promised--"

Jon is shaking his head against Martin's chest. "This isn't your fault. I--I said you could go, I said I'd be fine, I--" Jon looks up at him, his expression angry and stubborn. "I broke our promise."

"You didn't know there'd be a statement," Martin says, just as stubbornly. "You can't control it, and I knew you couldn't. But I left anyway."

"Because you trusted me. How could I blame you for--"

They're talking in circles, Martin realizes, making each other miserable and not getting anywhere. "Jon," Martin interrupts. His voice is soft, but Jon is silent at once, staring up at him defiantly, ready to defend Martin against his own guilt. There's a surge of blind affection in Martin's chest, and he presses a kiss to Jon's cheek before continuing. "There's no point in figuring out who's to blame. Maybe we both are. Maybe neither of us is. Technically, all of this is Jonah's fault, so I say we blame him."

Despite everything, Jon's lips twitch with a smile.

"If you really want to hash this out," Martin says, "we can do that later. For now, I . . . god, I'm just glad you're alright." Martin leans down, hiding his face in Jon's hair. "I love you."

"I love you," Jon says at once, and the words are like water down a dying man's throat.

For some reason, that's what brings tears to Martin's eyes. The rush of adrenaline has left him, and all there is now is cold relief and residual fear. His breath shakes. "I won't . . . I won't leave you again, alright? Not even if you let me."

Jon huffs a laugh, his eyes a bit watery themselves. "I'm not going anywhere," he says. "Never again, Martin, I promise."

Martin presses a kiss to his forehead, and then his nose, and his cheek. "I know. I know. Thank you."

"I should be thanking you," Jon says, and his tone is lighter even through the tears. "You saved my life."

"Would you . . ." Martin swallows, unsure if he wants the answer to his question. "What would have happened if you'd kept walking? Would you have . . ."

"Died?" Jon finishes the sentence breezily. "Hm. I'm not sure. I told you the Beholding's not great at hypotheticals, but maybe if I try to Know it . . ."

"N-No," Martin says quickly, before the sound of faint static can get louder, "that's--that's alright. I'd . . . honestly I'd rather not know, if it's all the same to you. And I don't want you getting a headache."

"Ever the considerate gentleman," Jon says wryly, and Martin matches his grin, unaccountably relieved to hear him sounding like himself again.

In time, once Martin has hugged Jon to his satisfaction, they make their way back down the hillside, towards the next leg of their journey. They walk hand in hand, fingers wound together tight, and it is a long, long time before they finally let go.

[soft-for-them]

husband has a real ring to it ♡ sam wilson x male reader

anon: hey so like, being sam wilson's husband (or new husband) at your wedding??? (sorry it’s a bit short...)

i haven’t specified if the male reader is cis or trans but there is a bit in here where the reader compares themself to steve, whether you see this as the reader being trans or cis is up to you.

the gif has no significance it’s just a good gif... also there is a HUGE lack of sam content out there. people get you shit together and write about my fave man. not proof read.

It is an odd time.

The country you now stand in is completely foreign to you. Nat can speak the language; you think it might me some form of Russian. If you could guess you think you might be in the Ukraine or a country that was once a part of Soviet Union.

None of the on the run Avengers will tell you exactly where you are for you safety but you don’t care.

All you care about right now is the blazer you just tried on is too wide at the shoulders.

Even Steve says the shoulders of the jet black jacket are too wide even for him and that saying something coming from a man who was artificially made to be the spitting image of masculinity and heroism.

Sometimes you do get jealous of the super soldier and how he came to be.

Once a skinny and short kid now the second most handsome man you’ve ever seen, sometimes you think ‘if only i was as strong as Steve and not a useless civilian’.

Thought if anyone hears your negative thoughts in this small, cramped room off the side of a small abandoned church you would be done for. 

Natasha, Wanda, Steve and Sam have always loved you and they don’t tolerate your pessimism at all. None of them will take your self-loathing especially on this very day.

But that’s the thing, you’re not self-loathing today. You push away any non-happy thoughts and put on a genuine smile.

It may not be official in the eyes of the law for your other half is a wanted war criminal but your getting married to your long time boyfriend Sam Wilson today and nothing will stop you from doing so. You have both promised that he will properly marry you but for now you have agreed to exchanging rings.

‘Where did you find this place?’ you ask Nat as she takes you too big blazer from you.

The place is completely and utterly abandoned in the middle of nowhere. Plants have caved in apart of the roof but the stained glass still absorbs and reflects light making the rotten pews look like the seats of a king.

‘I knew you might not want to get married in a church but this is the safest place I could find, that with the fact this is no longer a place of worship.’ She walks over to you and tucks a handkerchief into your white dress shirt pocket.

Regardless of if your religious or not you know this place is a perfectly acceptable place to trade rings with the man you love.

Nat looks you over and smiles, her arms wrapping themselves around you in a rare hug.

‘You look very handsome (y/n).’ she mutters.

‘Even with my beard?’ you half joke, referring to the scraggly hair growing back on your chin from shaving it off the week before for a disguise.

‘You have a better beard that Sam and Cap put together.’ Her tone is joyous but utterly serious which makes you smile grow even bigger.

You do not feel any negativity, all you feel is utter euphoria in your wedding attire.

‘You ready to go’ she whispers like a happy mother about to marry off her only son.

All you do is nod as you let her lead you out to the alter where you both wait for Sam and Cap to arrive.

Wanda sits in a front pew; she very obviously misses Vision and if it was up to you he would be here to celebrate for you had befriended the synthetic man before the ‘civil war’ happened.

But alas none of you can risk you all being found out on your unofficial wedding day.

For a moment you all wait in silence looking up the stain glass of some kind of saint.

This isn’t the place you want to get married in but you can see it’s charm even if it’s been abandoned, ransacked and left to rot.

You can imagine Steve giving Sam a prep talk, for he had given you one about an hour before.

When Steve had talked to you he seemed like a overjoyed father, even with the tears in his eyes, you’re still thankful the super soldier talked to you.

Your waiting is cut short as the side door that you and Nat had came through opens to show both Steve and Sam.

Steve walks out first, holding the door open for Sam then Sam walks out, his eyes automatically on you.

‘Ow, I though Steve was going to walk you down the aisle.’ Wanda quips to Sam despite her brooding feelings.

A short conversation goes on between Sam and Steve (probably another pep talk) but all you can focus on is Sam looking at you as he talks to Steve.

Steve pats Sam on the shoulder, which turns into a hug, then he lets him go.

 Sam wears a suit very similar to yours; a simple black suit that could be found quickly and very easily without being detected by Tony or an of the American government.

The woman in the small mum and pop shop where very kind to you both despite their being a language barrier, they had helped you get the suits for a good price.

Much like you also Sam wears no blazer jacket, with you don’t mind considering you can see every muscle through the hand made white shirt.

‘Where’s your blazer?’ you ask.

He walks right out to you and holds your hands. His hands are cold but you assume it’s from standing around in a derelict church for a while.

‘It was too small in the shoulders.’ He smiles, the gap in teeth showing.

‘Ah, that could have been my blazer Sam.’ You laugh grabbing the attention of the others. You all laugh at the mishap of the mixed up blazer but that doesn’t really matter.

Wanda stands up and passes both of you the rings; one single silver band with your name carved on the inside for you and a much fancier looking ring for Sam. Despite Sam’s ring looking more expensive it’s actually very cheap.

He had quickly bought it when you were all hiding out in China, Sam had quickly realised that he had a ring for you but he didn’t have one for himself. He’s had your pure silver ring for years now waiting for the right moment to give it to you.

 ‘How do we actually do this?’ you whisper whilst the other sit down on the pews.

‘I don’t really know, maybe when just exchange the rings and say something.’

‘Like vows? Do we kiss?’ the questioning isn’t really that serious for the two of you are smiling like idiots.

‘Well all I can say is that I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you-’ Sam begins saying as he slips the silver ring on your finger, ’-I love you my husband.”’

’Wow… husband has a real ring to it.’ You beam as look down at Sam’s hands, you fingers nimbly placing his ring on, ‘-Does this now mean I get to kiss the bride?’

Your joke not only makes yourself laugh but you can hear the laughter of the other in the background.

‘Gladly.’ Is all Sam say before holding your face and kissing you.

.

.

.

honestly i don’t think this is the best thing ever but i’m posting it.

i’ve been writing a lot of ftm trans reader requests today so i kind of automatically wrote the reader as trans at first. i’ve changed it so the reader can be cis or trans but i just putting that out there just in case i’ve forgotten to change something. (sorry)

also i know that many people have different types of weddings and cultures so i’ve tried to make it as ambiguous as i can, that why it’s not a technically legal wedding.

anyway, sam is the best and i would love to write more fics for him!

[shorkbrian]

Mirrors

Prelude - Haha Hi I've never done anything quite like this or this long (like 5k bich) but I am THORSTy and I’ve been sitting on these asks for so long I’m so sorry. ALSO to the ppl sending me the sweet gentle asks about my blog guess what??? I would D I E for you legit I read one of them this morning I almost teared up. I haven’t cried (Except for like (TW) s*ui*ide cry lol those don’t count) since like??? last year?? no joke. 

ANYWHO idk how to write a praise kink so I went with like, insecurity? but then Kiribaku likes makes the reader just melt cause they keep praising her and they bring it out during nasty times and she's GONE yeeted off the earth it makes her so hot and wet lol.

Pairing - Kiribaku X Reader

Prompt - 

Warnings - NSFW!!!! Dirty talk, my best effort at a praise kink, mirror stuff, ummmm mentions of kidnapping. DUB-CON big time, maybe technically even noncon cause reader DOES NOT want it but has just. resigned herself to being a plaything.

Music - https://youtu.be/STO4-8vkG0U 

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“What the fuck did you just say?”

You couldn’t meet Bakugou’s eyes. HIs gaze was so intense, eyes so passionate and fierce. You were so embarrassed, aware of Kirishima’s gaze fixed on your form from where he was seated in the armchair.  

“I-I…….. don’t like it…. when you talk like that….”

“Fuckin’ what?” Bakugou barked, his brows knitting in confusion.  

“What do you mean, baby?” Kiri stood, moving to sit next to Bakugou on the couch so he could see your face.

You wiggled around uncomfortably in your spot on the floor,  where you were kneeling between Bakugou’s feet.  Kirishima had made some comment, something about how pretty you looked being so sweet for Bakugou. You were literally just sitting there, but Kiri thought you worthy of praise

“It’s not true…… I’m not-my body doesn’t look nice and I just….. every time you guys say stuff about me, all I can think of is how bad I look.”  It was hard to choke out the words, your face flushing red as your eyes filled with tears. You were so embarrassed, having to explain your insecurities to your kidnappers. It was bad enough that they dressed you up in slinky outfits, booty shorts and thin shirts that were almost see-through. You hated it, hated the way it made you feel, hated the way it made you look. It was humiliating.

“Well that’s a bunch of bullshit. I don’t go around saying shit unless it’s true.” Bakugou glared down at you. He seemed angry that you would even have that view of yourself, the foot resting on the floor by your hip beginning to tap in agitation. 

Kirishima scooted closer so he could reach you, his hand coming up to stroke your hair. “We mean what we say. You’re beautiful, such a good, obedient little girl for us.”

“No, no - please don’t say that kind of stuff!”  You were getting worked up now, tears falling freely as you hugged your arms around your body. Kirishima shared a look with Bakugou, the two men quickly deciding to drop the conversation and move on to something else.

“Tch, whatever. C’mere”  Bakugou patted his leg, prompting you to shuffle out of your kneeling position and onto his lap. You would rather not, but you knew what resistance would result in, and you’d prefer not having to nurse a sore bottom and mild burns for the next few days. Bakugou wrapped an arm loosely around your waist, tugging you closer to him on his lap. Kiri still petted your hair, pressed up against the blond man’s side as he smiled at you.

“It’s fine baby, calm down. Maybe one day you’ll see what we see.” Without leaving any room for you to argue, Kirishima planted a quick smooch on your forehead before rising from the couch. “Do you two have any preferences for dinner? I was thinking we could order something from that yakisoba place, remember Bakugou? The one Mina recommended.”

“Yeah, go for it. They have any spicy shit?”

Tuning them out, you swiped at your tears, trying to reel yourself back into a steady emotional state. You feel so weak these days, both physically and emotionally. Being held captive by the two men had worn you down, made you prone to teary outbursts. You held no control - your daily routine dictated by the men from the first day they had snatched you from your home. You were reluctant to obey, had even fought them at first, but you quickly realized it was easier (and less painful) to just do what they wanted.  

Fighting was useless.

——

Weeks had passed since your little outburst. Unfortunately, Bakugou and Kirishima weren’t willing to give up praising you every chance they got.  You had an inkling suspicion that they had upped the amount of comments they made about you ever since that day, enjoying watching you squirm and your face go bright red. It made you blush, yes. Made your heart beat a little faster, made you flounder for words if you were in the middle of speaking. But you just felt….. shame when they praised you. 

They lauded you for your obedience, how compliant you were for them. Kiri would ask you to sit down and wait at the table while he answered the door (“don’t make a sound baby.”), and you did. Bakugou would have you sit in his lap while playing video games, and you tried you’re best not to squirm. It made you almost feel sick inside, how quickly you had adjusted to being their “good girl”. You just wanted to please, didn’t want them angry at you.

What really made you blush was when they would strip you down, bend you over the nearest surface. They’d be fucking into you, fondling your body while whispering compliments in-between kisses. You never felt “beautiful” nor “delicious”, no matter how many times they told you otherwise. It was especially humiliating when one of them would take you on the bed, the other watching. You always wanted to hide, shield away your body from their prying eyes, but they never let you.

You just didn’t get it, didn’t understand what they saw when they looked at you. Staring into the bathroom mirror, all you saw were your imperfections, your insecurities.  It was shameful, pathetic. You felt entirely unworthy of the attention and love you were being showered with.

——

The boys had seemed more… energetic today, Kirishima almost seeming to bounce with each step, Bakugou smiling gently at you. It made you nervous. It made you even more nervous when Bakugou took his leave, giving both you and Kirishima a quick peck on the lips before going out the door. It was a weekend, and you knew that both men didn’t have work today. You tried asking Kirishima where Bakugou was going, but all you got out of him was a laugh and “Don’t worry about it! He’s gonna do a little bit of shopping.”

Well, at least that eased your mind a tiny bit.

You didn’t have much time to dwell on it though, Kirishima herding you into the basement.  It was the their home gym, filled with weights and machines that kept the two men strong and fit, and you weren’t usually allowed down there. If you were, it was because both of the men were present, and they could watch you while they worked out (you knew that they liked showing off for you, even if they didn’t admit it.).

But today Kiri wasn’t going down there to work out. Once the two of you made it down the steps, Kiri was pulling an exercise bench over, instructing you to lay down on it, belly up.  You did what he said.

“‘Kay, I’m gonna go upstairs to get some stuff. I want your shorts off by the time I get back, alright baby?”

You nodded.

Sighing, you shimmied your shorts down as he left. You never had to worry about underwear - they never let you wear it unless you were on your period. You knew vaguely what direction this was going in, and had already resigned yourself to getting fucked silly by the redhead. It was practically useless trying to resist.

When he came back, you were surprised. He had rope and…… a Hitachi. That was new. In the short time you’d been living with them, you had gotten used to their habits when they fucked you. Neither man was too interested in toys,  preferring to stimulate you manually, so this was an unwelcome surprise.

“Mmhm, you look so sexy baby.” Kiri kneeled down next to you, before peeling apart your thighs. He grinned at you, shark teeth flashing, before snatching up the Hitachi wand, pressing it directly against your pussy. You didn’t like where this is going. 

He didn’t turn it on, instead reaching for the rope that he had brought down. The redhead began wrapping it around your thighs, lifting your legs to encircle them with the rope. It took a few minutes, which were tense, silent as you watched him work.  He made sure to also circle the rope around your hands and torso, anchoring your arms by your side. When Kiri was finished, you were trapped, unable to move your legs, to even simply part them an inch. The Hitachi wand was still directly on your pussy, snug and unmoving. It rubbed against your clit, making you bite your lip at the delicious friction.  Kirishima gave you a flashy smile, turning to ruffle your hair. Distantly you noticed he didn’t have a shirt on.

“Alright babe, we’re gonna have some fun while we wait for Katsuki. You know what this is?” He tapped the wand nestled between your legs.

“It’s…. It’s a vibrator.” You managed, throat suddenly dry.

Kirishima seemed to beam even brighter. “Yeah! I’m gonna turn it on, let you have your fun. But you gotta tell me before you cum, okay? Think you can do that?”

A quick nod from you and the vibrator buzzed to life between your legs, Kirishima not in the mood to dawdle. Your back arched off the bench at the sensation, the pleasure quick and intense. Kirishima stayed kneeling beside you, watching you writhe as he changed the speed of the wand. 

It didn’t take long for you to cry out, “Kirishima, I’m gonna cum, I’m gonna cum!”, a thin sheen of sweat covering your body. It made your shirt stick to your chest, accentuate the heaving of your breasts as panted. Right before you orgasmed though, Kiri flipped the off switch, the vibrations cutting off and leaving you hanging. Your eyes shot open, confusion furrowing you’re brow.

“Wha-Kiri? What?”

The redhead smirked, pressing a hand to your tummy to prevent you from moving against the wand, desperate for more stimulation, desperate to orgasm.

“Not yet baby, not yet.”

He patted your stomach soothingly as you stared up at him in confusion. You had been so close! Why have you tell him when you’re going to cum, only to rip that away from you??

A minute passed, then two, Kirishima still rubbing his big hand across your tummy. It was meant to be soothing, a soft gesture, but it only heated your skin, made pleasure thrum in your veins. When you had sufficiently calmed down, chest no longer heaving, Kiri reached down and flicked the wand back on, chuckling at the way you desperately ground against the rounded head of the toy.

“Mm, desperate little baby, aren’t you?” He was kissing your neck, letting his tongue slip out to lick at the skin there.  It set you on fire. Reaching the high of orgasm came even quicker this time, spurred on by your movements and determination to cum. If you didn’t tell Kirishima when you were about to, he wouldn’t be able to stop you. So you stayed silent, circling your hips as best you could, leaning into the hot kisses being pressed to your throat.

All of a sudden, the vibrator clicked off, Kirishima’s hand on your tummy once again.

“Thought you could get away with that one? You’re so cute.”

You felt like screaming, yelling out your frustration. He knew your body too well, could feel the hitch in your breath as you prepared to orgasm, felt your fingers tighten, clenching around nothing. He had stopped the vibrator right as you were beginning to feel it, the wave of pleasure. It was frustrating.

You could hardly believe you were thinking this, but you couldn’t wait for Bakugou to get back.

——

It was torture, having your orgasm slip away from you time after time. Kirishima was having fun, groping your chest, leaving sloppy kisses along your neck and collarbone. He liked seeing you struggle, almost at the point of begging and pleading with him in your need to cum.

He had been edging you for a while now, you didn’t even know how many orgasms he had yanked you away from. Kiri had just stopped you once more, turning the vibrator off and holding you still /right/ as you felt yourself letting go. You wanted to scream, on the verge of tears. But then Kirishima was glancing at his phone, stuffing it in his pocket before standing so he could untie you from the bench.

“Bakugou’s back, we’re gonna go see what he brought home for us!”

You could barely think straight, wincing when Kiri removed the vibrator pressing up against your pussy. You were drenched, pussy wet and red and puffy, your own slick covering your thighs. Kirishima helped you to your feet, guiding you into your shorts. You were too out of it to do much, simply letting the man guide and push and lift your body as he pleased. When he pressed up against you to pull your shorts snug over your hips, you felt his bulge through his shorts, poking you in the stomach.  You suppose he’d been waiting for relief too, just the same as you.

Kirishima helped you totter up the basement stairs, then guided you towards the bedroom, hand on your waist. You stumbled through the door, eyes immediately focusing on the giant mirror leaned up against the wall. How had Bakugou even gotten it through the door?  

“Damn Kiri, you’re really worked up.”

Bakugou was sitting on the bed, unlacing his shoes. Kirishima chuckled, hand leaving your waist so he could go sit beside the blonde.

“Me and her both man. Had to hold myself back, she was making such raunchy sounds.”

Their attention turned to you, both men smirking as they eyed you, Kirishima still with a prominent tent in his shorts.

“Yeah, I fuckin’ bet.”  Bakugou smirked. 

Kirishima stood, stepping languidly around you until he was at your back, broad chest pressing up against you.

“I mean, look at this -“ a hand cupped your mound, making you jump. You were still sensitive from being denied so many times, even the slightest touch had you twitching. “ - she’s fucking dripping.”

It was true, the crotch of your shorts soaked with your juices. Kiri rubbed his index finger against the seam, pressing it up and against your clit. You shuddered, hand flying up at grasp onto his arm. It felt so good, you hated his touch, didn’t want his hands on you, but oh, your body liked it.

Kirishima pushed you forward, fingers still teasing you through your wet shorts.  You gasped when you were pushed face first into the bed, bent at the waist.  A hot, blunt hardness rubbed up against you, Kiri’s hand still cupping your mound.

“You’re being such a good little bitch, letting us do whatever the fuck we want to your stupid little cunt.” 

You lifted your eyes, saw Bakugou smirking down at you as you were rocked gently by the force of Kiri’s humping. The blond was palming himself over his jeans, but your attention was quickly shifted when you felt your shorts getting ripped down, off your body.

“Step out.” You obeyed. Kirishima was hungry, lustful - voice deeper and serious now - no trace of his signature lightheartedness. He always got like this this when he was excited.  Your head was wrenched to the side, cheek mashed against the bedspread, large hand pressing and holding you in place. Belatedly, you recognized you were facing the mirror leaned against the wall, could see Kirishima’s bulk behind you, his shorts already pulled down to reveal his hard cock. If you hadn’t taken it before, you would be scared. He was thick, blunt and girthy - not to mention a considerable length. The tip was flushed red, almost purple, shiny with leaked precum and almost swollen. 

“Look at yourself in the mirror baby, you see that? How nice you look, all obedient and ready to take my cock? Such a good, sweet little girl.”

You looked so tiny compared to the redhead, the man having to bend his knees slightly to rub the head of his cock against your pussy. You tried not to moan when he focused it on your clit, rubbing it rapidly over the nub.  “Kiri - please……Aah! Let me - lemme cum..” You whined.

“God, you’re so perfect, you know that?” He breathed out a laugh, still rubbing the head of his blunt cock over your clit, hand still forcing your head to the side, making you watch his movements. You almost wanted to cry - being teased and denied for so long. You just wanted to cum, wanted to get this over quickly so you could go shower. 

Normally seeing yourself in a mirror was something you’d try to avoid, not favoring the way you looked. But now, you were mesmerized, watching through the reflection the way Kirishima’s red cock pulsed as he finally, finally slipped it into your opening. You choked on a moan as he slowly stretched you out, feeding inch after inch of his wide cock into you. In the mirror, you saw him tip his head back, groaning low in his throat when he finally bottomed out, fat balls pressed flush against you.

 “Fuck, oh god, feels so good. You’re so good, can feel your pretty little pussy trying to milk me.” He leaned down, warm chest plastered across your back as he whispered in your ear. 

“You really want this, don’t you? Such a gorgeous baby, so sexy and hot and  perfect.”

The man didn’t start out slowly, he never did. He was aggressive, unrelenting as he thrust his fat cock into you over and over. Your legs were shaking, the pleasure making you weak-kneed, your tongue lolling out of your open mouth, unable to quiet your moans. Kirishima’s pace was frenzied, excited, animalistic as he chased his own pleasure, the sound of his skin slapping against your own filling the room. It was incredible.

His dick hit all the right spots, pressing you closer and closer to your orgasm. If he didn’t let you cum this time you were going to cry.  Your could hear the lecherous, sinful sounds of your pussy squelching, milky juices getting everywhere. It coated his dick, was covering your thighs. You could feel drops of wetness being flicked everywhere on every thrust, the wet, fast slaps of his thighs against you making your stomach clench even harder.  The hand in your hair pulled up slightly, wrenching your head back in order for Kiri to give your a quick, desperate kiss - full of teeth and spit. He had hardly detached from your lips before he was mouthing at your back, spitting out filth as he did so.

“Shit, I love you so much. Wish I could be inside you all time - see how easily your body takes me? You were made for this, such a filthy little baby. Always look so tempting, always wanna fuck you, fill you up, make you squirt.” 

His words were getting to you, as you were forced to watch him pounding into you, hips snapping and tensing in an animalistic fashion. It was too much - the pleasure, his crude words, the visual of seeing yourself getting fucked, worshipped. Your eyes closed, clenching shut as you moaned over a particularly satisfying thrust. Kiri didn’t like that. The hand not holding your head against the bed slipped underneath you, immediately finding your clit, pinching at it viciously.

“Open your eyes, keep watching or else I stop.”

You wailed, eyes flying open. Kirishima was smiling, still kissing sloppily at your back as he began playing with your clit.

“You always look so tasty, can’t tell you - Fuck! - how many times I think about fucking your brains out during the day - shit, you’re so good for me.”

HIs hips stuttered as he rammed forward, signaling he was close. He wasn’t the only one - your hands clawing at the bedspread, your hips moving and twitching as you tried to grind yourself against his hand, his cock slamming into you.  His big hand rubbed you just right, and it sent a pang of sizzling pleasure trough your body.  A broken cry left you as you finally orgasmed, hot, shaking, senseless. Thank god.

The wild twitching of your pussy as you rode out your high triggered Kirishima’s own orgasm, the man burying his face between your shoulder blades as his own hips twitched wildly, humping his cock into you as he released his seed.  He was cursing, saying something, but it was muffled by the skin he caught between his teeth, making you squeal as you felt hot cum shoot into you. It took a minute for the man to slow down, thrusting through his orgasm and into the aftershocks, milking and prolonging both of your pleasure. It felt so good, so right. You were so high from the endorphins that you couldn’t even think to remember how wrong this was, how you didn’t want any of it.

Pulling out, Kirishima watched his cum begin dripping out of your cunt, pushing himself away from your back as he stood, chest heaving, body glistening with sweat. You were barely able to keep yourself up, still bent over the bed, legs wobbly and arms jelly. A separate set of hands pulled you to the side, and you let yourself be manhandled, pulled and situated in Bakugou’s lap, his chest to your back.

You had forgotten about Bakugou.

His jeans were off, along with his boxers. His shirt was gone too, thrown somewhere on the floor. The blond ripped at the shirt still plastered to your chest, the fabric giving in easily to his strength. You couldn’t bring yourself to care as it shredded right through the middle, freeing your tits. It’s not like it hid anything anyways.

“Jesus, that was so fuckin’ hot, watching Kiri pound into you like that. Look at yourself, leaking everywhere like a damn hose. You like having Kiri’s cum sliding out of your soggy little cunt?” 

His chin hooked over your shoulder and he directed your gaze forward. 

There was another mirror.

It was leaned up against the far wall, allowing you a perfect view of your sweaty, debauched body as Bakugou spread you legs, hooking your knees over his own so he could force your thighs even further apart. Oh god.

He was hard as a rock, moving your body around on his lap so his dick pressed up against the outside of your pussy, cum still escaping from your hole. You were exhausted, body limp and pliant - you didn’t know if you could go another round.

Bakugou didn’t care.

A harsh slap had you crying out, a sharp “Ah!”  Filling the room. Bakugou slapped your slit again, and you tried to curl in on yourself, protect yourself from the abuse on your sensitive pussy. The blond slithered a hand around your chest, reaching up to grip your throat lightly.

“Stop that. Fucking look at this shit. See how sloppy your pussy is? Everytime I do this - “ He delivered another quick slap, and you writhed on his lap, which caused you to push against the hard cock nestled between your thighs. “ - You let more cream out.”

Without saying anything more, Bakugou shoved the hand not around your throat under your thigh, lifting you up just enough so he could slip his dick into you. HIs cock was less girth than Kirishima’s - it was  about the same length but a more manageable size. He had been jacking off while watching Kiri fuck you, so his length was already coated in a layer of his spit and precum. That, combined with the cum already drenching your insides,  meant he met virtually no resistance as he thrust up slowly.

You writhed, the hand at your throat and at your thigh keeping you steady in his lap. Kirishima was on the floor, leaning his back against the bed as he watched the two of you in the mirror, still panting and calming down from his intense orgasm. 

There wasn’t any time to adjust, to ask Bakugou to wait, you’re too sensitive to go again! He was more relaxed than Kirishima, more controlled and languid in his thrusting. He rolled his hips, bouncing you gently in his lap as he forced you to keep your head straight, despite your efforts to turn away from the mirror showing your own reflection. You looked absolutely filthy - face flushed, tits bouncing, Bakugou’s hard cock drilling into you. You couldn’t help but moan, the sight stirring up something, some heated feeling inside your tummy.You liked watching them fuck you.

“Goddamn, every single time feels so fucking good. Shit, shit shit shit - it’s like you were made for us!”

He sounded so gleeful, so truthful. You unconsciously clenched around his length, feeling tingly as his thrusts ground deep, hit every single spot that made a sweet zing of  bliss race through your body.

“Ah, ah fuck, you finally get it? You see what we’re fuckin’ on about when we say you look so damn delicious? Shit, I wanna take a bite outta you, so juicy and ripe and fucking perfect.”

Bakugou was out of breath, his voice deep as he growled at you.  You grabbed at the arm around your chest, his thighs, his hair - anything to anchor yourself as his balls papped against you. You could hear someone moaning, whining and sobbing, was that you?

Kirishima had recovered, moving to kneel between Bakugou’s and your own spread legs. “Bakugou, you two look so good together.” That seemed to spur the blond on, his thrusts speeding up as he grunted. You screamed when you felt  a wet muscle swip at your clit, looking down to see Kirishima grinning up at you, his tongue hanging out. On each thrust, he was licking at Bakugou’s cock, and then at your clit right above him, making you wiggle and spasm as you tried to escape the intense sensation.

“Kiri, Kir- stop! Stop, please I can’t! Stop, stop stop stop!”

You were pushing at his head, albeit weakly, but you were trying to move him away, becoming frantic as the combined efforts of the two men overwhelmed you, had you throwing your head back against Bakugou’s shoulder and gasping. Bakugou snickered, before plunging his tongue into your open mouth, stealing a kiss. You whined, scrabbling at his arms, Kirishima’s hair, trying to get away but simultaneously trying to bring the two of them closer. It felt so /good/, you didn’t even have the words to describe how heavenly and lascivious and filthy you were feeling. 

“Hah, you’re so wet, you hear yourself? Sloppy girl. Taking me so well, shit, so goddamn good.”

You could indeed, hear yourself. On every thrust of Bakugou’s, your pussy squelched, greedily sucking him in. It was absolutely filthy, hearing your juices and Kiri’s cum sloshing together as Bakugou shoved his cock into you, again and again. You could hear Kirishima slurping at your cunt with fervor, could tell by the slick sounds and rhythmic movement of his arm that he was frantically jerking himself off as he lapped at the point where Bakugou’s hot flesh met your own.  It was hot, not only in temperature. 

“C’mon baby, let it out, let me taste you. Wanna see you clenching around Katsuki’s cock like the good, sweet little girl you are.”

Kirishima’s words hand you reeling, and the second his lips went back to attacking your clit, you were gone. It almost hurt, how tense your muscles became, squeezing an agonizingly delicious orgasm out of you. Bakugou felt you release, his thrusts speeding up as Kirishima kept his tongue out, laving at Bakuguo’s cock as he hammered into your clenching cunt. You were crying, twisting In Bakugou’s hold as you were quickly overstimulated, shrieking as you were left with no respite.

It didn’t take long for Bakugou to cum, spurred on by your writhing and tears, the way you were begging and pleading and sobbing, imploring the men to stop. With a guttural moan, the blond gave on last thrust, shooting his seed into you, hot ropes of cum filling you up. Kirishima was still licking around Bakugou’s cock, catching the cum and slick that squeezed it’s way past the cock plugging you up.

You shivered, relaxing against the hard chest behind you as Kirishima eventually stopped lapping at you, his own arm still. He had cum again at some point, pumping his cock into his own fist. Bakugou pressed a gentle kiss behind your ear, panting hotly against the shell.

“Fuuuuuck-“ he whined out “- that was amazing.”

“Mhmm.” Kiri hummed his agreement, slowly standing. The redhead flopped down on the bed, crawling up to sprawl out on one side, head resting against a pillow. Bakugou slipped out of you with no warning, your sudden gasp as you felt wet drip out of you making him chuckle. He maneuvered your lax body onto the bed, next to Kirishima, before pressing himself up behind you, trapping your body between the two men. You were too tired to feel gross, to mind the wet slide of your thighs as you shifted into a more comfortable position. Kirishima threw an arm around your waist, leaning up on his elbow to hover over and across you, stealing a kiss from Bakugou. Then he was stealing one from you, wet mouth connected to your own. 

You didn’t fight.

When he flopped back down, you breathed a sigh of relief, feeling like you could finally relax as the two men stayed silent, all three of you exhausted, fucked out. 

This was only the tip of the ice berg. 

If you knew how often and intensely the men intended to fuck you near the mirrors, you would probably pass out. They just wanted to show you what they saw in you. It had been two of the strongest orgasms you had experienced in a while, but there was no way you’d admit it was because of their praising and insistence  on making you watch yourself getting railed by them.

For now, you let yourself drift into a comfortable doze, let the heat of the two bodies caging you in keep you warm, keep you trapped.

Why bother fighting? 

There was no escape.

[writingsbychlo]

home for christmas | mitch rapp

word count;  10,665

summary; mitch is happy to settle down with the simple life, and he just wants to celebrate christmas with his fiancée, for the first christmas he’s had home since before he joined the army. 

notes; I know this isn’t stan’s farmhouse in the movies, but this is the kind of farmhouse I picture them having, so you’re just gonna’ have to use your imaginations!

warnings; smut, thats about it.

“Mornin’, soldier.”

Mitch simply huffed, a smirk forming on his face as he rolled over, raising his brows a little, sleep still evident across his face, the crease from a pillow being pressed into his cheek, the red mark disappearing into the dark stubble-smattering on his jaw, and you reached out a hand, rubbing over it as he blinked himself a little further awake. “Not anymore, sweetheart. You think if I was still a soldier I’d be getting to sleep in this late with a pretty woman by my side?”

“I should hope not, you were with me for the most part, so if you had another pretty woman in your bed, you should fess up now. I’d hate for that to come out on the altar.”

He growled, rolling you over until you were pressed back into the bedding, nipping a little at your shoulder as you broke out in a fit of giggles, albeit strained as the weight of his frame pressed into you, 200lb of solid muscle crushing you lovingly. “Don’t even insinuate it.”

“Yeah, I know.” You mumbled, a hand threading into his hair, and the teasing nips became soft kisses pressed to your bare skin, and he eventually gave up, rolling onto his side, and letting you cuddle up into his side a little, exhaustion no longer claiming either of you, but laziness in the bliss of the morning was. “Merry Christmas, Mitch.”

“Merry Boxing Day.”

“Technicalities.” You whispered, pecking at his cheek, the closest spot you could reach, before you were pushing yourself to it up a little more, legs crossing on the mattress, and stretching your arms up above your head to loosen the muscles.

“What was that?”

“What was what?” You repeated, head rolling from side to side, before you were shaking yourself down slightly and revelling in the numbness slipping out of your bones and muscles as energy surged through you instead.

“That pathetic excuse for a good morning kiss.” He tapped at his lips, pouting them slightly, brows raising as he watched you move to press your feet to the cold floors, standing up only a moment later. “Where do you think you’re going? Get back here and kiss me!”

“Nope. If you want kisses, you can come and get them.”

He gaped, watching you disappear into the bathroom, and you ginned to yourself, hearing the floorboards of the bedroom creak from a room over, running your toothbrush under the tap as you squeezed a dollop of the paste onto the bristles, raising your eyebrows at the man behind you. He had braced himself on either side of the doorframe, large shoulders and tall stature all but filling it, messy bedhead and unshaven jaw making him a vision of morning laziness, and he raised his brows at you as he returned your stare, a smile on his face as you scrubbed at your teeth.

Pacing across the bathroom, he pressed you up against the counter from behind, hands finding the edges of the sink as your hips pushed up to the cold porcelain, and he hooked a chin over your shoulder. One hand came up, on the other side of your jaw, twisting your face towards him, and you lifted your brush down long enough to press your lips against his, hearing him hum happily finally got what he was after. Your lips moved softly against his, a slight foam build-up getting stuck in his stubble as your mouths worked together, but neither of you could find it within yourselves to care, the first kiss of the day still feeling just as special as it had the first night you’d stayed a night together, all those years ago.

When he pulled back, he licked at his lips, wiping away the froth stuck on the spiky hairs around his face, grinning a little, and pecking a kiss to your temple. “You taste minty.”

“Of’ious’y.” You mumbled, the word getting confused in translation through the workings you were doing, but he raised his brows at the sass, gasping slightly, and you grinned, spitting and rinsing, before turning to look at him “Captain Obvious over here.”

“You’re sassy this morning.” He teased, pinching at your ass and snickering as you yelped, smacking away his hand and fixing him with a false glare. “Don’t be so sassy on Christmas.”

“I thought it was Boxing Day?” You retorted, watching him roll his eyes fondly, and as you wandered back into the bedroom, you noticed that he’d made the bed, blankets pulled straight, and you appreciated the gesture

“It’s our Christmas Day. Is that really what your Christmases were like these last few years?” His hand found yours from the second you had a jumper pulled on over your shoulders, tugging you toward the staircase and down the rickety steps that were in urgent need of repair, but those weren’t on the list yet.

So far, the two of you had made some pretty grand progress on the house that you were now calling your own. Your father had returned to duty, and you were in charge of renovating an old farmhouse, and making it truly liveable once again. The broken pipes, squeaky doors and splintering panels were no longer cutting it, and in the couple of short months since your lover had returned from the front lines, and stayed here with you.

The first week after your father had left, had been entirely spent in bed, properly celebrating the engagement you’d made, the way it should be celebrated when you were young and in love. The following month and a half leading you up to where you were now had been spent planning, clearing out the junk of old furniture and stripping the insides of the house, all the work you couldn't do alone, finding yourself now with a partner.

The porch was being extended into a wrap-around, and the outside had been stripped. The flaking paint had been sanded off, the wood underneath smoothed and repainted, before the weather had turned too cold and wet, glazed over and perfected, an off-white colour that complimented the darks of the landscape around it. Mitch had spent almost a week straight fixing broken and cracking tiles on the roof, a week when your heart had leapt into your throat every time he went up the ladder, fearing that he’d fall or injure himself, and yet the real injured had come inside.

As the final fall warmth had slipped away and the bitter and biting cold had started to come in, you’d thrown out all the moth-bitten and broken furniture inside, plans to replace it all, and sell what you deemed worthy, raising funds for the major project you’d undertaken. Splinters, torn nails, and grazes from tripping over and scraping your knees and elbows on rough flooring. However, it had all been worth it, and you shivered a little as you stepped into the kitchen, feeling the squeeze on your hand, before looking up to the man standing behind you.

“Sorry, I got lost in my thoughts. What dd you say?”

“I said, is this how you always spent your Christmases for these last few years?” The sounds of the kettle filling up as it sat on the top of the old gas stove sounded the metal clanging a little as it filled, the two of you waiting patiently over the racket, before settling it over the flame to begin heating. “Y’know, celebrating late, the video calls, all that?”

He was referring to the real Christmas Day, yesterday, having been spent waiting for the time when you’d get to talk to your father over a somewhat glitchy video chat call for your twenty-minute slot, having no idea when it would actually be. “Yeah, pretty much. Except, for the last few years, I had to do it twice.” You poked at his stomach as he stood before you, a grin on his lips, before he was catching your hand, pulling it up to press a kiss over the ring shining on your finger.

“Funny, to think that for years, I’ve been excitedly waiting to facetime my superior’s daughter, just to get a Merry Christmas and a kiss through the screen while I was out in the middle of God knows where, defending our country, and we never even knew.” His arms looped your waist, pulling you in close against the cold of the late December chill in the air, and your own arms wrapped around his neck. You leaned in, enough that he thought you were going to press a kiss to his lips, before you were lifting yourself up, and standing on his feet, grinning when he grunted, before he was looking at your curiously. “What’cha doing, kitten?”

“The floor is cold. I don’t want to stand on it.”

“Well, it would be considerably less cold if someone had just picked which tiles they wanted before the store closed over Christmas, I could be getting on with installing them, and we would’ve had heated kitchen flooring by New Years.” He tutted, lifting you to sit on the counter as the kettle began to whistle, and he worked around you to fill up the teapot on the side with the perfect brew, two mugs being gathered from one of the cupboards, before it was being pressed into your hands.

“I wanted real stone! All the samples of tiles just didn’t seem right, and-”

“And you want to have a rustic and authentic farmhouse feel, I know.” He finished your sentence for you, heat flushing your face at just how many times you must’ve said it for I’m to have memorised the statement, and he chuckled, letting you hope down and back onto the cold and stripped flooring of the kitchen to make your way to the table. The scraping of the wooden chairs over the flooring rang out, and you sat in beside him, blowing the steam away, and picking up one of the catalogues that were stacked up, opening it up to the last dog-eared page and taking a look at it all. “What do you want for breakfast?”

Despite asking the question, Mitch was already rattling around in the drawers for a frying pan, seeming to have made up his mind on what he was going to eat, and so you hummed a little, sipping at the herbal mix in your mug. “Whatever you’re having is fine.”

“Eggs and bacon it is, then.”

You only nodded, unsure whether or not he could see you, but you weren’t looking at him, falling into a comfortable science together as you examined the conversions and extensions laid out on the glossy pages before you. The sizzling and popping of the eggs and bacon faded into the background, ideas swirling in your mind as he worked, the cogs brushing off the dust as you took in what you were seeing.

Most of them were small conversations, sheds and garages, all with ideas on how to save heating and conserve energy, but your mind was wandering your own home. You’d already done so much, knocking through the wall of the small guest bedroom beside your own to turn it into a closet, and tearing up the flooring in the downstairs of the house, to replace it with newer and polished solid oak slats. How much harder could be building a wall, and converting something a little bigger than a shed?

A plate landed in front of you, making you jump in shock, before the magazine was being pulled away from you, and the smell of the meal was enticing you in. “Should I be concerned that you spend more time looking at renovation magazines than wedding ones?”

He was smiling as he spoke, no heat to his words, but you scoffed nonetheless, tapping your finger against another pile of magazines, and you felt as though your entire house was spilling over with them, filling the house in piles from top to bottom. You had more magazines than yo id furniture at this stage, the small and slightly dull Christmas tree in the corner being a sad excuse, an old TV propped up on cardboard boxes and cushions along the floor with a blanket put down, the rest of your ‘living room; being barren, waiting for its decorating to be complete.

“Have you even chosen a dress, yet? I already have my suit.”

“I’m excited to marry you, Mitch, I really am. I couldn't imagine anything that would make me happier, but that is one day of our lives. The best day, but just one day. This house is where we’re going to live, it’s the future you want, and where we’ll grow old. If something goes wrong on our wedding day, that sucks, but we’ll fix it.” He paused his chewing, staring at you with wide eyes across the table, before swallowing his mouthful thickly and reaching out with one hand to lace your fingers together to sit atop the wood. “I want our home to be perfect.”

“It will be, we’ll take our time.”

You smiled, letting him mirror the action, squeezing his hand in your own, before pulling your hand back to pick up your cutlery, and beginning into the meal he had made. “For the record, I have a few dress ideas.” You tapped the cover of one of the furthest magazines from yourself, the pages worn and folded, evidently having been used, and his brows shut up, a grin on his face as he ate.

“Can I see?” A few crumbs flew from his mouth as he spoke through the food stuffed between his cheeks, and you tried to hold in your chuckle at the sight.

“Please don’t do that at our wedding.” You grimaced, and he swallowed his mouthful, sticking his tongue out at you childishly, the playful manner between you both being more than comfortable, it was perfect, and you kicked at his shin under the table as he wiggled his brows cheekily. “No, you can’t look at them, it’s bad luck.”

“Don’t be superstitious.” He scoffed, pulling the magazine over to himself, and holding it out of your reach when you leaned across the table to snatch it back. “Besides, it’s bad luck to see the bride in the dress before the day, not to see some random model in a dress.”

“Yeah, well, don’t you want it to be a surprise?”

His eyes flicked down, smirking a little at the swell of your breasts hanging from the robe your wore that was falling open the more you reached to get the brochure back, and you gave up on that tactic, rounding the table instead to try and grab it from him. He scooted back, the chair legs scraping against the bare concrete floor, a loud laugh on his lips to match the giggles you were letting out as the war became a game.

“Mitch! If you keep this up, I’ll purposefully buy a really awful dress! Something from the eighteen hundreds with frills and layers, and I’ll look like Little Bo Peep!”

“Baby, I’d marry you even if you were wearing a potato sack.” As you reached for the folds of paper, he snatched your wrist in his other hand, tugging you into him until you were perched across his lap, a leg dangling on either side of his on the chair, and he wrapped that same arm around your waist, connecting them behind your back to hold you securely, and your own looped his neck. “But, please don’t wear something with frills and layers and a thousand buttons, because it’ll make it way harder to have our first dance if I can barely reach you over a puffy gown.”

“I’ll wear something a little bit more modern, then. I’d hate to miss our first dance.”

You brushed the tip of your nose against his, lips brushing together as he smiled, and you heard the magazine drop away to the ground, before both hands were splaying out over your back, and pushing you closer, until your chest was pressed to his, and you were looking down at him, sharing a breath. “Besides, kitten, don’t you think you should wear something that I’ll be able to get you out of easily when we get to be alone, afterwards?”

“Well, I think I should get something cheap, because I have a feeling you’re going to rip it.”

He growled under his breath, catching your lip with his teeth and tugging gently, before pressing a kiss to the edge of your mouth, hands moving down to sit on your ass, as he pressed another kiss to your jaw, and then your cheek. “Don’t tempt me.”

“Not tempting, I just know you too well. If previous experience in pretty gowns is anything to go on.”

He chuckled, nodding his head, before wrapping his arms around you fully, face resting in your neck as he settled in to hug you, prompting you to squeeze yourself a little more firmly around him in response, a hand coming up to brush through the long and messy tendrils of hair on his head. “I love you.”

“Love you too, Mitch.”

Your food was growing cold, half-eaten and still sitting out, but you were much more invested in soaking up every second of the loving embrace he was offering you, and so you were more than happy to remain this way, wrapped up in his arms, for as long as he would take it.

The time slipped by, mumbled conversations taking place, and the hands on the clock ticking over the o’clock marker and beginning the afternoon, the late lay in that the two of you had indulged in giving a glorious delay to the day. Lazy and relaxed, it was exactly how you wanted to spend your late-Christmas, and when he finally shifted to check the clock himself, he merely huffed, the hot breath fanning over your neck and making you twitch a little as it tickled, and he loosened his hold on you to let you go.

“Do you still want to have a Christmas lunch? I can set everything off, but it’ll be more like dinner with this timing.”

“I think it’ll be fun to have it later, we can eat while watching movies. We can drag all the blankets and cushion we still have down onto the floors and make it cosy.” He merely nodded, before standing with you still in his arms, stealing a final kiss from your lips as you giggled, the grip on your thighs loosening as you sank to the ground, finding him now looking down at you, lips pressing to your forehead once he let you go. “Go light the fire in the living room, it’s a little cooler today. We should get the heating going earlier.”

“You got it, soldier.”

He smiled bashfully, nudging you towards the empty doorway, knocked through to make it all more open plan, and you could feel his eyes still lingering on you a little as you wandered through to the main room. Settling before the cold fireplace in a comfortable position, you assessed what you were seeing before you, noting that it was filled with old ash, days having passed since the two of you had emptied it. Dragging out the collecting tray underneath, you tipped it into the bucket, the edges stained, trying not to let the dust escape into the room too much, and tipping it carefully so that it didn’t cloud in the air.

While the house did have heating, it had all been disassembled and the heaters taken from the walls for the renovations, the two of you seeming to have missed that when planning your work to take place inside over the Christmas period, leaving the house cold unless you lit the fire.

When the grates were clear once again, You began to scrunch up the pages of the old newspapers and letters that were no longer in use, creating a range of tight and loose balls of paper form them, and beginning to stack them in the fire. Small kindling followed, twigs and little chunks of wood, coal to follow, to keep the heat going for longer, burning quietly. It didn’t take much longer of patting around yourself and searching to find the matches, the almost empty box being revealed to you, and with a single strike, a flame was taking up at the end, and you buried it within the pile. The newspapers took a light quickly, flames roaring up within seconds as they burned brightly, the paper becoming ash after only a minute or two, but it had been long enough for the smaller wood to catch.

The flames were duller, but the heat was already beginning to pour off of the fireplace as the smaller wood caught fire, crackling a little as it went, the black chunks of coal starting to smoke slightly, turning ashy grey where flames touched, and there was no way it would go out now. Adding some logs on top for a longer burn and more enjoyable smell, you deemed it a job well done, wiping your hands clean on the rag hanging beside the fireplace, and placing the grate over the front, hauling yourself up to stand.

Eyes closing in on the ash bucket, you were tempted to leave it there, but foreseeing the accident of tripping over it and spending house cleaning up ash was more than enough to motivate you, the images flashing behind your lids when you closed them. Mitch was tinkering in the kitchen, the dull clashes of pots and pans, the sink occasionally switching on and off, hearing him shuffle around and chop as he prepared you both a meal, and you moved across the room, swapping your robe out for one of his hoodies and a coat to combat the cold air.

Grabbing the bucket and taking it with you, a shiver ran down your spine at the cold air that swept over you from the second that you stepped out and onto the porch, the swing bench squeaking as it rocked in the slight breeze, and you looked around for a pair of boots. Tugging on wellies for the trek through the slippery mud and frosty grasses to the compost pile at the end of the first field, you set off towards it, arms tightly wrapped to your body to seal out the heat.

A short walk all things considered, but it felt like miles in the biting cold, and your fingers were trembling against the cold metal of the bucket as you tipped it all out, stomping it down a little with your foot and covering the dry dust over so that it wouldn't blow away all over the place, knowing just how good it all was for the fields.

The two of you hadn't quite decided what you wanted to do with the land yet, but you still had plenty of time to make up your minds. Mitch wanted to go for the full traditional farm life, with animals and agriculture and the whole shebang. You wanted to take a more modern turn, with pretty gardens and orchards, maybe grow fruits and vegetables, something simpler but not requiring the work that potatoes and pigs would take. After all, it was just the two of you, right now. That little collection of books and leaflets was still sitting unopened, the two of you having agreed to leave that decision until after your house was finished, and everything else was settled, instead of burdening yourselves with too much at once.

As you made your way back, you took in everything around you. While the area may look a little barren and empty right now, you had big plans for it all, the house being the main feature, standing out like a sore thumb as it looked beautiful and prominent with all it’s redecorating in opposition to the abandoned and somewhat desolate landscape around it, even the barn still needing redoing.

Placing to bucket down on the edge of the porch, you spun, hands tucked into your pockets as you considered the tall wooden structure.

It hadn't been used much since your grandparents had owned the farm and all of the land around it, keeping it traditional, back when there had been a tractor and plough that would park inside with hay bales and spare supplies, all of which would contribute or the farm, but had eventually broken or been sued up, never replaced. You could barely remember what it was like inside now, not having been in there since you were a child, your father telling you all about how he’d play and hide in here when he was a child, but your memory was fuzzy.

As you approached it, you found chains locked tightly through the weakened handles on the chipping wood, a large coded padlock keeping them closed, and you smirked to yourself a little, lifting the freezing metal up to examine it. The numbers were almost worn away, yet still just enough visible for you to work with, and you tried your birthday on it, finding that the lock didn’t budge. Your birthday had always been your father’s passcodes and passwords, a fact you’d discovered when you were twelve and never told him about, so you had unimpeded access to everything, but clearly not this.

Despite your peaked curiosity, you had almost given up, before remembering that this was your grandparents’ barn, and likely still had their code on it unchanged from when they realised their son was going into the army, and wouldn't run their farm. Trying your dad’s birthday, the lock popped loose, enabling you to untangle the chains and leave them hanging open as a muffled ‘aha!’ fell from you. The doors were heavy as you pulled on them, large wooden frames that were stiff from years of disuse. The hinges were rusted, and so you were just about able to get one open enough to slip inside, the musty smell of farms and equipment overwhelming your senses, bringing back memories you didn’t know you had forgotten from when you were a child.

There was lighting, but you didn’t think it would still work, flicking your hand over the switch, and as expected, they didn’t light up. The stairs were damaged, floor was strewn with old hay and broken equipment, useless bits of equipment, and you could see just enough of it all from the gaps in the wood that served as windows. It was large, even larger than you’d remembered, the wooden framework appearing smaller on the outside than it was on the inside, and the pipes along the walls were broken.

Following the trail along, they met at a sink in the corner of one room, a large bathtub that was caked in mud, and you assumed that it had always been the place where your grandparents would wash up after a hard day’s work, before going back up to the little farmhouse, as not to trail mud through the home. The wood of the walls rattled slightly, doing nothing to keep out the cold as some wood even began to give way, looking as though it was in desperate need of repair, but a little TLC would go a long way into transforming the space.

Upstairs was far more exciting, or it had been, when you were younger. The balcony overlooked the lower floor, a higher platform where the centre missing to look down on the main floor, and you’d loved to play hide and seek up here when you were barely above hip-height on your father, feeling like an adventure just for going up the steps. The bannisters and barricades were snapped and broken now, years of misfortune taking them, but it was a simple fix. The space would be infinitely better once all the leftover crap had been hauled out of it, and it was stripped bare for renovations.

You were wound up in your thoughts, jumping a little as the main door scraped some more, your lover squeezing his way inside, looking around the lower floor, before dragging his gaze up to find you at the top of the steps. A warm coat wrapped around him, feet shoved into wellies like your own, pyjamas pants ruffled from the action and he looked adorable, a grin taking over his face as he looked at you.

“Thought you’d be up in your closet sorting out our clothes and keeping warm, or something. Didn’t expect to have to hunt you down in a barn when the temperatures are dipping so low.”

“It’s freezing out here, right? There’s absolutely no insulation in here.” He chuckled, unsure of where that statement was going but watching as you came darting down the steps, and meeting you halfway, producing a hand from his pocket to take your own, fingers weaving together, before he was hiding them both back in the warmth it had once been, holding you tight to his side and following your gaze to look around. “It would be better, with some insulation and panelling.”

“Much better, I agree.”

“If we did it up real nice, painted it like the main house, it’d make a pretty great living space, don’t you think?” He hummed, eyes narrowing as he looked around, clearly not seeing the same thing you are but not wanting to voice it, and you grinned, the hand that wasn’t joined with his and tucked in his pocket waving in front of yourselves. “It has a water supply, so there could be a kitchen and bathroom down here, in the far corner, and some couches. A TV set up, a little coffee table, a whole load of nice rugs to keep the floors warm. Upstairs, a bed, and all the storage, a simple but effective living space.”

“I guess so, but we don’t really need it.”

“Of course, we don’t.” You bumped your shoulder against his, and he lifted his arm up, keeping his hand held with yours but letting you snuggle under his arm, instead, drawn close to his body for warmth. “But, it would be great for dad. He’s not home a lot, but it would be a great place for him to know he can come back to when he’s not on deployment, and inevitably retire to.”

A warm laugh bubbled up beside you, the man shaking a little as the sound rumbled from him, and you turned to face him, quirking a brow. “We’re kicking your dad out of the farmhouse, now? He’s not gonna’ like that.”

“Yeah, well, we’re going to need privacy when he’s home.” You poked his side lightly, watching a cheeky expression filter over his features as he stared out at the barn, cogs working inside his mind as he began to picture it like you were, and you turned to look at it all yourself, mentally constructing the perfect home for your father. “Besides, his room and the guest rooms might want to be something else, someday.”

You heard his breathing hitch, his gaze locking not you, and two fingers hooking under your chin to turn your gaze back to him. He choked down the lump in his throat, seeming a little nervous, nibbling on his lower lip before finding the words. “Do you mean as, like, baby rooms? Nurseries and kids rooms?”

“Yeah, I do.”

He let out a shaky laugh, sniffling a little as tears lined his eyes, your brows furrowing as you twisted to face him, bringing your hands up to his cheeks and cupping them, using your thumb to wipe away the first tear that fell. “We’re going to have our own little family? I get to have that, with you?”

“Oh, ‘course you do, honey.” His vulnerability was making you emotional yourself, tears burning in your eyes at the bright expression on his face, and he pressed a series of needy and quick kisses to your lips, between short gasps of breath, wet cheeks and lashes sticking together as he did, unable to contain his smile.

“I’ve always wanted kids, my own family, to be a dad.”

“I know.” You whispered, fingers stroking delicately over his skin as he still trembled a little under your touch. “You okay?”

“I’m so much better than ‘okay’. Every moment with you just gets better and better, I’ve never been this happy before.” You stood for a few moments longer, before the chill was becoming too much, and he was dragging you back to the main house, pausing only to redo the lock and chains on the rickety barn doors. It had a lot of work to do, but you had more than enough time, not planning to have a baby any time too soon, too much for the pair of you yet to do, but the day would come along one day, and now, you had a plan.

As you reached the door, kicking off your boots together and standing them up neatly, he took your coat for you, hanging it up inside and sealing the door against the cold, your skin tingling ad the warmth of the house embraced you, and he rubbed his hands up and down your arms, pressing a kiss to your head as he stood behind you, warming you up a little, and you wiggled your toes in your socks as you regained the feeling within them.

“We have a couple of hours to kill before dinner is ready.” He mumbled, the feeling of his voice vibrating along your skin making you grin a little, ticklish assault drawing giggles out of you as you tipped your head back a little further for him. He took the access granted to him, wet mouth closing further over soft and exposed flesh, his teeth beginning to join the mix, scraping enough to make you shiver. “Any ideas on what we could do?”

“Yeah, I have a few..”

He hummed happily, hands on your hips to turn you around, until your nose was bumping against his, and he could flick his tongue out just enough to tease at your lips, a smirk forming on his face. “What did you have in mind, kitten?”

“Something dirty, we haven’t done it in a while. We can get all the stuff out.”

“I like where this is going.” He whispered, leaning down to catch your lips with his, whining when you pulled back enough to keep him chasing, puckered lips forming a growl as you denied him affection. You gave in, leaning in enough to peck at his lips, dragging your kisses along his cheeks as you cupped his face in your hands, and he let out a soft and breathy laugh as you did.

“Is that a yes?”

Your lips were brushing the shell of his ear, and you flicked your tongue out a little, just over the shell, feeling him tremble slightly underneath you in response, fingers flexing against your hips. “Absolutely it is.”

“So, you agree? We should do some cleaning?”

He huffed, pulling back, an unamused look on his face as he stared down at you, and you beamed up at him, thoroughly entertained by the way a moody was look was flashing over his features, and he pouted, not wanting kisses but instead wanting attention instead, and his hands pulled away, dropping down to his sides as you laughed at him.

“Oh, c’mon, baby. I’m just messing with you.”

“It’s Christmas.” He mumbled, grouchy as he tried to readjust himself through his pants, an uncomfortable look passing over his face as he did, and it only made you giggle more. “You’re not supposed to be a tease at Christmas.” You dragged your hands over his chest, pushing one up until it was tangling in the grown-out hairs that were deeply in need of some brushing and cutting, nails scratching at his scalp. Despite how much he wanted to keep up this act, he was already beginning to crumble, head leaning a little to press into your touch, and features softening the more you soothed him.

“It’s always a good time to be a tease, I have to keep you on your toes. Keep it exciting!”

He chuckled, rolling his eyes and bringing his hands up to find your cheeks, pulling your mouth up to his. It wasn’t the kiss you were expecting, it was a lot softer, more romantic and passionate, his tongue never dipping out to find yours, but simply your mouths working together in sweet and delicate exchanges. Thumbs were brushing over your skin, rubbing calming patterns and you sighed out happily against his mouth, stepping in closer until you could feel the warmth radiating from him, barely an inch between your bodies, and you wondered how it was possible that after all the time you’d been together, he still managed to make your heart race like this.

“I love you, Mitch Rapp.” Your words were whispered into his mouth, and he nodded his head, not breaking away long enough to return the words, before everything about the moment was changing. Sweet and romantic was crashing into a burning inferno of passion and need, teeth nibbling at your lower lip as he tempted them apart, wet articles tangling together as the desperation between you arose.

Hands were circling around to your back, lower and lower along your body, until he was taking handfuls of the fleshy mounds of your ass, pulling you in so close that your breath was knocked from your lungs at the impact of colliding, arching up into his chest with each drag of blunt nails over your covered skin. His bruisingly tight grip was making you whimper just at the touch, and his mouth continued to dominate over yours, a delicious attack that was leaving your lips stinging and raw as you kissed him back with equal force.

The moment that his hands slipped to your thighs, his legs bending as he braced himself, you took your queue, familiar with the unspoken signals between you both by now, and your legs wrapped around his waist as he lifted you into his arms, your own looping his neck. He was able to navigate the home expertly by now, knowing his way around without even a single hitch, and the first you knew of it was when your back was meeting cold sheets.

You gasped, arching up into him, and with the break in the frantic kisses came hickies along your neck. A wet mouth, descending along your skin to suck at your neck, teeth teasing and lips sucking until you were so tightly wound up with need that you thought you may burst at any moment.

He took his time, marking you up as though the two of you had all the time in the world, and while technically you did, you wanted to rush through to the main event, the drawn-out build-up making your head spin as it drove you wild, needing to feel him more than you wanted to simply imagine it. There were times when the foreplay excited you, when you’d spent hours kissing him, teasing him, rocking your hips down into his lips he was doing to you now until every part of you was sparking with excitement, making every touch he gave you even more thrilling.

This wasn’t one of the times, though. This was a time when you needed him now, when you needed to be joined to him in the most intimate way that you possibly could. You weren’t sure why, maybe it was just because it was the most wonderful time of the year, festive activities and jovial emotions heightening everything. Or, maybe it was the revelations that had come to you today, the two of you planning for your future always made you overflow with adoration for him, because he was committing himself to you in every possible way he could.

Every inch of your skin felt itchy, like you craved to be connected to him with every fibre, each cell in your body lighting up with the need to connect, and with your legs locking around his hips, you flipped him over, until he was staring up at you through wide eyes, cheeks flushed and a smirk painted in place of his usual endearing smile.

Your hands found the hem of your jumper, tugging it up and over your head, throwing it away to the floor as you felt like you were burning up with heat, and he sat up quickly enough to be able to help you with your t-shirt as that was next, lifting over your arms once you had it over your head.

“Y’know, I usually like to be the one getting to undress you.”

“You were taking too long.” You retorted, your hands dragging along his stomach, finding the hem of his shirt, and he raised his arms up over his head to let you peel it from his skin, hot to the touch as your fingertips as you traced the faint scars and hairs littered along and between his pecs. The muscles jumped under your touch, and you pushed him back down into the bedding, a breathless chuckle sounding from him, and he bent his arms, propping them under his head. The veins along his biceps made your mouth feel dry, and you leaned down, the tip of your tongue tracing along one until it disappeared at his shoulder, and you placed a kiss there, feeling him twitch a little at the featherlight touches.

“Forgive me, darling. I was trying to make it romantic.”

“No, you are getting back at me for being a tease.” You whispered, using one finger to push his head to the side, and he growled a little as you did, the sound cracking and breaking off as you sucked against the pulse point on his neck. His heartbeat was racing, the patch of skin throbbing as you worked to leave a large mark on his skin that would glow dark purple for days to come, and his breathing went shallow as you worked at the patch.

It was rare that ever let you have control enough to leave lovebites on him, the marks you littered on his skin were usually red marks along the skin of his back or nail prints on his shoulders, bite marks littered along his flesh as you tried to quiet yourself. It was the same way he would to you when you got so desperate that he’d fuck you wherever you were the honeymoon phase of your relationship lasting right up to your actual honeymoon, the two of you still driving one another crazy by a single lingering glance.

It was exactly how you knew that he was the one, that he meant the world to you and would always be your other half, because no matter what, the love and passion between you never dulled.

“Maybe I was getting back at you a little bit, but does that make you think you can take over?”

“Maybe it does.” His hands found your hips, and you rocked in his touch, grinding yourself back along the strained length that was tenting his sweatpants, and he bucked up into you as you did. Every roll you made back along his length, he met you with an equally forceful thrust, moans beginning to leave you as the pace picked up, and your fingers were curling into fists within the bedsheets as you simply tried to control yourself. “Fuck, Mitch..”

“Well, that’s exactly what we could be doing.”

He flipped you back over, and undignified and unaccepting sound on your lips as he took the power once again, the battle between you both becoming more erotic with every twist and turn of your bodies. He kissed all the way along your chest until he could sip his tongue below the hem of your pyjama pants, hot breath fanning over your skin, before he was peeling those down your legs.

You stood, sinking to your knees slowly as you dragged his sweatpants and boxers down his body, hands massaging your way back up his legs, fistfuls of his round ass making him jump, groaning under his breath and cheeks flushing pink at the attention that you gave to his body, the blush spreading right along to his chest. Kissing along his hips, he tangled a hand into your hair, stealing your thunder because as the strands were tugged, stinging against your scalp, you were putty in his hands once again.

Instinctually, your mouth fell open, a wicked look flashing across his features as he pushed the head of his cock between your lips, that dripping tip being all he let you have to begin with.  Sealing your mouth around him, he let out a string of appreciative noises in the forms of curses praise, your tongue dragging over his slit, a moan rippling through you at the salty taste of his precum spreading through your mouth.

You focused your attention there, tongue swiping and circling him, making sure his skin was soaked, and as you made to sink down further, he pulled away, wet cock smearing across your cheek and his thumb slipping into your mouth instead.

As you suckled on the digit, his fingers spread out over your neck, tips digging into the flesh, and your thighs clenched together, rubbing needily to try and quell some of the fire threatening to burn you up.

“You horny, baby? You need my cock, hm?”

You nodded, knowing he didn’t want you to use your words to reply, and he let out an approving sound as you did, pulling his thumb back, and sinking his index finger between your cheeks. This time, as you lapped at the finger, he continued to go, prodding back until you were gagging around him, tears lining your eyes and you were certain that the panties you were wearing would be ruined, because the feeling of being so completely and utterly under his control was something that always made you crazy.

He cared for you, he was dedicated to you, and every single time that the two of you had been together, he’d given you his sole focus, making you the most important thing in the world to him at that time, giving you everything you wanted, and now, you wanted to care for him.

“Want t’ make y’ feel goo’.” Your words were muffled, his brows raising, and he pulled the wet finger back, trailing over your skin and leaving it wet as he tipped your head up to look at him. He was prompting you to repeat yourself, and you licked at your lips, smiling at him a little as you tried to steady yourself. “I wasn't to make you feel good.”

“Trust me, kitten, I always feel good.” There was a smirk on his face, and despite having no instruction to do so, you scratched your way lightly up his thigh until you were taking his cock in your hand, pumping him slowly. His jaw dropped, eyes fluttering to half-lidded when you squeezed, and he thrust lightly up into your hand to meet you. “Mhm, good girl, just like that.”

You grinned, hand shifting further down, and you took him back into your mouth. The hand in your hair loosened a little, going lax as he relaxed under your touch, eyes sliding closed as your mouth worked along his length, sinking further and further down with every bob of your head. When you no longer needed to pump him, reducing him to a grunting and moaning mess above you, your hands were finding his thighs, gripping on tightly enough to leave imprints of your nails in the solid muscle.

Your cheeks hollow, sucking along his length tightly, and the vein along the underside of his cock throbbed along your tongue as you flattened against hit, a moan echoing through you and vibrating along is length, the fingers in your hair twitching. “Touch yourself, baby.”

Your eyes snapped up, finding that at some point he had lifted his head to look down at you, brows raised, and he lifted one heavy arm to brush the hair back out of your face, gathering a more competent ponytail out of your hair, a firmer grip, and he began to control the speeds of your movements once again. You adjusted yourself, legs widening when his foot tapped against the insides of your knees, and your hand slipped down to prod at your folds.

You moaned around him once again as your fingers brushed over your swollen clit, his hips bucked up and into your face and making you gag around his length, and he nodded approvingly as he watched you begin to please yourself. Working slow circles over the nub, electricity shot through your body, and you let him guide your head slurping and sucking at his cock, wet and filthy as you pleasured him, and the sounds he was making above you were enough to fuel your own bliss.

Working your fingers in tandem with the pace of his bobbing, the feelings racing through your veins was enough to dull the ache in your jaw and hide the tears beginning to spill down your cheeks as he tapped continuously at the back of your throat. Wetness was building up, slick pools within the cotton of your panties that were making it hard for you to move as the material restricted you, and you whined at the lack of available options, wanting more but unable to obtain it.

“As much as I love getting to watch you swallow everything I give you, that’s not right now. I want to fuck you first, kitten. Get up here.”

As he pulled you off of his cock, your head tipped back to face upwards, strings of saliva snapping as his shining cock pointed upwards, angry and red and needy for a climax, and you took gasping breaths, clambering to your feet on shaking legs as he supported you. Hooking his fingers into your panties, he snapped the elastic against your skin, and you grinned, turning in his hold and ignoring the huff he made, because he was moaning loudly a second later.

Pressing up and into him, you bent at the waist as you dragged them down your legs, wet core rubbing along the length of his cock, and he gripped at your hips, one hand smoothing across your back halfway through standing up, keeping you bent over. “Y’know, I was going to do this romantically. Fuck you real good, wrap you around me, kiss you while you came. But now, I think I want you on your hands and knees.”

He placed a rough spank to both sides of your ass, a cry sounding from you before he was pushing you toward the bed, and you stumbled a little, kicking off the panties wrapped around your ankles to be able to crawl back onto the bed. The mattress dipped underneath his weight as he crawled up onto the space behind you, groping at your ass, the head of his cock sliding through your folds and gathering in your wetness.

He lined himself up, cock stretching your entrance as he sank into you, and your forehead dropped down to your folded arms, a loud whine of his name being all that sounded out into the room to accompany the dragged out sound he was making, pleasure surging through him.

As soon as he was fully encased within your walls, he gave you a moment to adjust, and when you were ready, you began to rock your hips back into him. It was slow movements at first, rocking your hips into him, small circles as you adjusted. His large girth always required you having a minute to acclimate, and he was more than happy to waist, but by the flexing of his hands on your waist, you could tell he was scarcely holding himself back from going wild.

“You can go. Please, Mitch, I need it.”

He chuckled, pulling back almost entirely out of you, setting a slow and steady rhythm. “I know you do, sweetheart, I can feel it. You’re clenching around me so tight.” Your walls fluttered at his swords, the raspy voice in which he praised you was enough to make you whimper, sounds muffled as you bit down on your lower lip, and he tutted. “Did I tell you to be quiet? You know how much I love to hear all those pretty noises you make.”

He pinched your side, making you squeak a little, before a hand was wrapping around your middle, and pulling you up until your back was pressed to his chest. Fingers spreading out wide over your stomach, the other slipped up to your throat, pressure being applied lightly, and the rhythm of his hips was becoming more aggressive and deep with every second that passed. You were squeezing around him, every roll of his hips that slammed into you with enough force to drag against your sweet spot made broken calls of his name sound out.

“If you want to be quiet, though, maybe I’ll keep you quiet, huh?” His fingers tightened, squeezing enough to make your vision spot, and you cried out his name, but it was barely a whisper when it was voiced.

You tried to move back into him, meet his pace, but he was slamming his length in and out of you with motions that you couldn't keep up with. Your eyes were rolling back in your head, no thoughts able to be processed as the inside of your head was chanting a mantra of his name, alongside begs and please that you weren't even sure what for.

Reaching a hand up behind you, you held onto him, hand in his hair and tugging, until you could twist your head to catch his lips. It was a messy and rough kiss, all tongues and teeth, pent-up need and pure love shining through as the two of you fucked your way right through your connection. You almost missed the hand on your stomach slipping lower, until he was rubbing uneven and jagged patterns onto your clit, your entire body jerking as you crashed into your orgasm.

He choked on his breath, biting down roughly on your lip as you clamped around him, and the peak caught you both off-guard. You Cried out, both in pleasure and pain, and he released your lip from his touch, licking soothingly over the patch and whispering an apology into your mouth while his eyes rolled in his head. Your foreheads were pressed together, and when you became too weak to hold yourself up anymore, your body dropped forwards.

Your cheek pressed to the mattress, and he followed after you, one hand beside your head curling in the sheets as the other held onto you with a vice-like grip, sloppy pounding and erratic thrusts making you claw at the bedding. The overstimulation was too much, and tears were once again finding your eyes. Those screams you’d denied yourself earlier were coming to claim you in full ails now, his name a loud sob on your lips as the coil in your stomach continued to wind up, fire burning over you.

Your entire body was sparking with energy, and as he stiffened above you, pulling himself out, you collapsed down into the bed. You were still twitching, body hanging on the precipice of your second climax, and you were granted it only moments later.

Two fingers, slamming into you without warning, pumping so quickly that stars flashed behind your eyes, and your throat was raw with the sudden scream that you let out. Our legs thrashed, arms cramping and knuckles aching with how hard you gripped into the bedding, riding through your peak on his hand.

“Mitch! Hold on!”

“Again.” He hissed, giving you only a seconds reprieve as he flipped you over, a hand on your stomach to hold your hips down, wet fingers finding your weeping hole again, and your cheeks were stinging with tears as a pleasure so strong began to wash over you that you forgot how to even breathe. “Are you going to come? You are, I can feel it, walls like velvet grippin’ me so tight.”

“Please!”

“Please what, kitten? You want my cock, that how you want to come? Want me to fill you up, fuck this pretty little pussy full of cum, huh?” You let out a ragged moan at his words, barely able to nod your head, and he pulled his fingers back, hands spreading over your thighs to push our legs apart, settled back into the dip and sinking his cock back inside of you. Your legs wrapped around his waist, his hand trapped between your body as his fingers, soaked with your arousal stayed nestled against your bud, rubbing frantic circles onto it as you ascended into the clouds.

“Oh, fuck, Mitch!” With a final shout, you came, the bedsheets around you soaking as you gushed, hips bucking up wildly and body spasming in the bed, his form crushing you as he found his own high. Bliss was encasing you both, a bubble that only the pair of you existed within, and as ropes of hot cum filled you, he collapsed down on top of you.

He licked at your earlobe, lips brushing your ear and you shuddered, whimpering at the electric racing through your body from the action, your fingertips tingling, and he was still sitting snugly within your walls, throbbing and leaking with the aftermath. “I love you too, kitten.”

Your heart beat strongly, arms wrapping around him as you laughed weakly, catching his lips in a light kiss. It was gentle, just enough to confirm everything that had been shared between you both, before the sticky and wet feelings around you both were growing uncomfortable. He lifted you up, your body shaking as he slipped out of you, an ache that you were accustomed to taking place, and he pressed a kiss to your shoulder before standing up. He offered you his hands, helping you to stand too, and your knees almost gave out on you as you peeled yourself away from the sodden covers, the remnants of your final orgasm still dripping down your thighs.

“Go clean yourself up, baby doll, I’ll grab you some clothes.” Heat flushed along your body as something thicker than your own cum was leaking along your skin, smearing between your thighs with every small step you took, and you could hear mitch shuffling in the bedroom. The wooden floors were cold under your foot, every foot chilling you back down a little more, shivering a little with goosebumps, and your body was relieved to sit back down as you reached for the paper roll, cleaning yourself up and slumping into the seat.

Washing your hands and smoothing down your hair, you felt considerably cleaner, almost as though you were drunk as you continued to float through the skies on the high that being with your fiancé had given you. When you returned, still a little wobbly but much more stable, he had stripped the bedding and replaced it, a more Christmassy set than before laid out in its place, and he had pulled on some clothes.

Padding his way over to you, you raised your arms lazily, letting him pull on a fresh set of clothes, before shimmying you into some pants, giggles and laughs muffled between kisses and gasps when you stumbled, before finally, you were cosy and dressed again.

“That was awesome.”

“Bet your cute little ass it was.” His hand found yours, tugging you along behind him and into the corridors, the smell of the meal that was being made for the two of you floating around, and you let out a groan as yous stomach rumbled. The scent grew stronger as you moved through the house, enticing you deeper and deeper, and you stood beside him as he began to check everything over, leaning against the kitchen counter. “I had a thought about the wedding.”

“You could sound more optimistic about that.”

He chuckled, shaking his head and pecking your lips in confirmation. “I can’t wait to marry you, love. You know that, I’m just not sure how you’ll react. I know you’ve been looking into places for the wedding, and we’ve gone to look at a few venues, but none of them really felt right. Right?” You hummed, eyes narrowing to him a little, and he busied himself with poking at the turkey to check whether it was done, nudging the over door closed again. “Well, what if we had it here?”

“Like, the farmhouse here? Because it’s kinda’ in shambles at the moment. A lot of work left to be done.”

“Well, yes and no.” He sighed, still avoiding your eye a little, and you tried to shuffle a little closer towards him as he worked. “Not in the farmhouse, but what if we had a summer wedding? Something simple. We could have it outside, picnic benches in the fields when they fill up with daisies and dandelions. You’ve sent me some pretty pictures of those fields before. We could do it picnic style.”

His voice trailed off a little as he spoke, and you could tell he was beginning to doubt himself, and so you pressed up behind him, arms around his waist and pressing a kiss to the patch between his shoulder blades, feeling him relax a little under your hold. “I love it.”

“You do?”

“You’ve let me make every decision about our wedding, our house, and our future so far. You deserve an equal say, and if you want a picnic-style wedding on the farm, then that's what we’ll do. I think it sounds lovely.” He twisted to face you, hands holding onto your cheeks and thumb smoothing over your skin, a stare fixed on you that felt as though he was boring into your soul.

“I just want us both to be happy. I don’t have an opinion on a lot of it, my interior design choices are limited to bunk beds and camo.” His joke made you scoff out a laugh, brushing your lips against his.

“That’s okay, soldier, I can make the tough choices on paint colours.” He rolled his eyes, closing the gap for only a moment, and you relished in the loving touch he held you with. “Oh, my bad. You’re my farmer, now.”

“That I am.” He mumbled, a few more shirt kisses pressed to your lips, before he was pushing you backwards. “Go choose a movie, I’ll plate us up some dinner.”

You lit up, and he seemed to see it sparkling in your eyes as his lips pursed. “No.”

“You said choose a movie!”

“I meant a Christmas movie! I’m not watching ‘The Mummy’ again this week.” Your arms folded over your chest at his words, a pout on your lips and he frowned, holding sting for only a few seconds before he was whining, turning away from you to reach for plates. “I know the whole script by heart now. I’m growing to hate that film.”

“Yeah, but you love me!” Your words were sung a little as you made your way through to the living room to load up the television, hearing him mumble his reply, words you couldn't really hear, but you knew he was only confirming your sentiments. As the Christmas lights twinkled, the fire still burning and in need of new logs, the television flickering to life as your soon-to-be husband served up dinner in the farmhouse kitchen, you knew there was no place you could possibly be that would make you any happier than right here.

[dc41896]

The Whole Time?!

Pairing: Jake JensenxBlack Reader

⚠️: Maybe a tiny bit of technical angst (🤷🏽‍♀️ lol), fluff💕

“P-Pooch?,” you stammer unable to fathom that your supposedly dead brother was standing in front of you and his wife who was about to give birth to their son in any minute.

“Hey peanut,” he smiles stepping further in the hospital room. “I’d hug you, but I’m w-,”

You didn’t even let him finish before immediately wrapping your arms around his neck and burying your face in his shoulder. Good thing he was already wet from the rain, your tears would just be a welcomed addition.

“Wait. D-Does that mean-”

“Hey babe,” the all too familiar voice speaks making more silent tears fall as you lift your head. Just as soaked as Pooch, he nervously smiles removing his hat to reveal his spiked frosted tips. He pretty much looked the same as you last saw him. Toned arms and chest shielded by his dripping jacket along with your personal favorite, his black circular frames bringing even more attention to those crystal baby blues.

There were plenty of times you thought about what you’d do if granted this moment. Cry, scream, maybe jump into his arms clinging onto him like a koala on a tree. Possibly all three even. Now, finally being granted your wish after all these months, there was one main thing on your mind.

“Wow,” he smiles as you slowly move closer to each other. “I didn’t think it was possible, but somehow you’ve gotten more beautiful.” Just as the words left his mouth, the back of your hand connecting with his abdomen in the hardest hit you could muster nearly knocks the wind out of him as he keeled forward.

“And apparently stronger too..,” he coughs.

“How could you?!”

“I didn’t do it on purpose! We had to so we could go after the guy who set us up. And why didn’t you hit Pooch?! He was in it too.”

“He’s got one coming after my nephew safely enters the world, right now though it’s your turn,” you glare before smacking him again.

“Told you she had a strong backhand,” Pooch states quickly closing the room door before his sister decided to direct her rage at him.

The rest of the team merely watch in entertainment as your hits move to his shoulders and biceps until Jensen can grab your wrists pinning them by your sides.

“I’m sorry for putting you through all that, but it’s not like I completely left! I could still see you.”

You tilt your head in confusion ready to ask what he was talking about, until seeing Clay nervously scratch the back of his neck as he and Cougar shift their gaze clues you in on what he meant.

“SERIOUSLY JAKE?!”

“Wha-? I-,”

“Did you really think that would make me feel better?!”

“...Honestly at this point I’m afraid to answer.”

Annoyed groan falling from your lips, you tried to escape his grasp, but his larger hands slightly tightening their grip on yours, along with him following your every movement, keep you in place. “When we go home I can explain everything.”

“Will you? Or are you just gonna lie some more?”

“I promise I’ll tell everything,” he whispers, leaving a chaste kiss on your temple before flashing one of his ‘please don’t stay mad at me forever because I love you’ smiles. So far, it’d gotten him out of any argument you had. Including this one.

Darn those good looks of his.

“Fine,” you reply as you cross your arms, leaving him to find a seat in the nearby waiting room.

“Any tips here Colonel?,” Jake sighs.

“I’m probably not the one you’d want relationship advice from.”

Another heavy sigh leaves his lips as he follows your path down the hall to sit next to you. That is if you’d let him.

“Okay, is anybody else stuck on the fact that Jensen actually has a girlfriend?,” Aisha states breaking the momentary silence and making both men chuckle.

———

It’s the happiest he’s ever been to walk into his small, outdated apartment. Things weren’t exactly the same as he left it with your few new decorations and pieces of furniture trying to make the place a bit of your own, but of course he didn’t mind. It actually warmed his heart that although he was “gone” you still chose to stay, sticking by his side when you easily could’ve moved on with your life.

“Jeez, the faucet always drip that loud?,” he lightly chuckles shedding his coat and placing it on the small hanger by the door.

“It started a bit after you left,” you sigh kicking off your shoes. “Think it’s loud now, it’s even louder when you’re just sitting here alone.”

Following you to the bedroom feeling like a dog with its tail between his legs, he sits at the foot of the bed looking down at his hands as you move about the bathroom getting yourself ready for bed. Your words were like the sharpest sting as his mind vividly showed an image of you just sitting in this apartment with nothing but thoughts of loosing your brother and boyfriend along with the hum of the AC. He knew for the sake of their mission, and the team, he couldn’t say anything, but it still didn’t take away his guilt of what you went through mentally and emotionally.

“I tried to write you.”

“What, your computer go down and you couldn’t watch me anymore?,” you counter over your shoulder before rinsing the soap from your face.

“That was only once okay? I was watching my niece’s soccer game and then I thought about what you were doing and kinda sorta hacked your office’s cameras, which yes I know was wrong. Speaking of, they really should update their software, a fifth grader could easily hack into it just guessing the password,” he answers making you roll your eyes with a chuckle.

“And who’s Tom?”

“Tom?”

“Yea. Curly brown haired guy, cubicle across from yours. Big head you can see a mile away.”

“I’m sorry are you somehow trying to turn things on me when you’re the one that’s supposed to be explaining why I’ve thought you were dead this whole time?,” you ask wiping the remaining moisturizer from your hands before crossing them in front of your chest as you step closer to the now nervous looking man.

“N-no, of course not! But I mean since he’s been mentioned...”

“He’s just this guy at work that apparently likes me and asked me out but I said no, because a small part of me kept hoping that you’d miraculously come back. Happy?”

“I-uh...y-yes?”

Sighing, you sit beside him tucking your bare legs under you and taking his hand in yours to trace the lines on his palm. You never knew how or why you started, but it was something you occasionally did while you two were talking or just lying next to him enjoying each other’s company. It brought a smile and giddy feeling to Jensen, just as it did to you.

“Listen, I’m sorry I’m giving you a hard time, I know you didn’t have a choice, and understand. Selfishly though, I just missed you so much and wish I could’ve known. It definitely would’ve saved some sleepless nights and tears.”

With his other hand, his thumb and index finger gently grab your chin guiding you to meet his eyes. “I’m sorry for everything I put you through having you think I was dead. The second we threw our tags in that fire you and my family were all I could think about. Like I said I wanted to write and give you some sign that I wasn’t gone, but I could never figure out how to start. Plus Clay threatened to cut off little Jensen if I did send anything back home once he found out, which only made it tougher.”

“Yea we wouldn’t want that,” you softly laugh following a short sniffle you were trying to hold back. You really were done with crying, having done so since you got that devastating call so long ago, and just wished your tear ducts would shrivel up already. “Sorry, I thought I was done with the tears.”

“Shh, don’t be.” Leaning forward, his soft as clouds lips meet the single salty droplet in the middle of you cheek erasing its presence before moving to yours in quite possibly the most delicate, tender kiss you’ve ever experienced. Any other time, you’d probably call it painfully slow, trying to take the lead to move things along. But as you both sat there taking everything in from each other’s scents to the feel of how one’s lips and mouth felt on the other, you couldn’t feel more connected.

Just barely pulling away, his swollen lips rest centimeters above yours ready to take them again as soon as he caught his breath.

“I don’t know if I should be embarrassed at myself or amazed at whatever powers you have,” he starts, a light chuckle escaping him. “But I think you just made me-,”

“Jensen!,” you laugh, playfully smacking his shoulder. “Way to ruin a romantic mood.”

“If it’s romance you want, say no more,” he smiles taking your hand in his and placing it on his chest as he clears his throat. To the best of his ability, he begins singing the opening lines to your couple’s song, as Jake proclaimed it, instantly making you fall back on the bed in laughter.

“You actin' kinda shady, ain't callin' me baby, why the sudden change. Say my name, say my name!”

“This is definitely not a couple’s song,” you laugh feeling his forearms rest on either side of your head and chest vibrate from his laughing.

“I’ll admit lyrically wise..yes, you’re right. But it’s still ours which makes it special.”

You’d never forget that day in the grocery store trying to find a pint of your favorite ice cream as the song played overhead. Without really looking, you thought you were on the freezing aisle by yourself and began singing along as you gently bobbed your head. Suddenly hearing a voice singing the background vocals made you slightly jump turning to see the taller man in a grey sweatshirt, blue and white basketball shorts, and sneakers holding up his hands.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you. I-It’s Destiny’s Child, I couldn’t resist.”

“It’s okay, and I mean who can?,” you respond, both softly laughing before shyly looking back at your respective sections to get your frozen desserts.

“Soo...you like ice cream?,” he asks interrupting the momentary silence.

“Yea, um my favorite’s moose tracks,” you answer briefly holding up your pint with a smile.

“You know who has a good moose tracks? Bennie & Bailey’s downtown. They make it from scratch and I don’t know what all they put in it, but it’s amazing.”

“Oh, okay thanks. I don’t think I’ve ever been there.”

“Well you should definitely go one day. I mean if you want,” he nervously chuckles.

“Will do,” you smile. “Only if you’ll take me though?”

At first, being met with his shocked, speechless expression made your newfound confidence falter thinking you might’ve been too bold with the cute stranger, whom you hadn’t even asked if he was single or not. However seeing his eyes shine bright and adorable smile grace his pink lips, your excitement returned as he moved closer handing you his phone.

Years later, the rest is history as you lie in bed with the man you were sure was the love of your life.

“Hey what’s going on in there?,” he asks brushing his fingertips across your forehead noticing you become quiet. Lightly scratching his goatee, you feel your eyes start to water again causing you to blink a few times trying to keep them at bay.

“I just don’t want you to leave again,” you whisper, moving your fingers to card through his chestnut and blonde mixed strands.

“I’m not going anywhere unless you ask me too.”

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[spaceskam]

Pretty Little Picture (3/3)

okay so TECHNICALLY this was for day 3 of @malex-cupid but then ice robbed me of my wifi for like two days. So here is now. Whoops. (thanks for reading!)

warning for mild sexual content which i forgot to say at the beginning of the last chapter my b

ao3

Alex woke up to a heavyweight on his spine.

It took him a few moments to register it and he had to crane his neck a bit, but, sure enough, Michael was passed out against his back. His cheek was smushed against it and he was definitely drooling a little bit, but Alex didn’t mind. With a sigh, he let his head fall back against the pillow.

His eyes closed as he thought about the night before. About kissing and touching every inch of him that he could. Neither of them really anticipated that, so they didn’t have lube to do anything too strenuous, but they definitely managed to have fun regardless. Maybe it was too early, but he didn’t regret it. It felt good and they worked weirdly well together.

However, the peace of it all only lasted a few minutes before Michael’s alarm started to go off.

“Why does the world hate me?” Michael whined, slowly peeling himself off of Alex to go turn it off. In that time, Alex flipped onto his back. It didn’t stop Michael from falling right back down onto his chest. “You don’t have any chest hair.”

“Good morning to you too, I guess,” Alex laughed, raking his hands through Michael’s fucked up hair. They needed a shower. They were going to take one the night before, but they very quickly got distracted. “I shave it or get it waxed, it gets itchy.”

“Really?” Michael said, scratching his chest gently, “Mine doesn’t.”

“I think it really only starts getting itchy once you’ve started shaving it. Like Liz says she doesn’t get how Max has such hairy legs without it being itchy because hers get that way if she tries to go more than a week,” Alex explained, yawning halfway through. Michael hummed thoughtfully and then turned to prop his chin upon his chest.

“Sounds plausible,” Michael decided. Alex hummed softly, letting his eyes slip closed out of pure selfish reasons. He was warm and comfortable and he didn’t want to get up. “We can stay in bed a little later if you want. Brunch instead of breakfast, remember.”

“How long until then? ‘Cause we both need showers,” Alex pointed out. Michael shifted, moving up a bit more until Alex sensed him just hovering above. He opened his eyes slowly to look at him.

“Two hours,” Michael said softly, eyes drifting across his face, “But we could take one together. Save water and time.”

Alex huffed a laugh, rubbing his hand up and down his arm before leading it up to his neck.

“Genius.”

“Yeah.”

Michael moved down, kissing him much slower than he had the night before. He let the rest of his body press up against Alex which made it very clear he hadn’t bothered to put any clothes on. Alex had at least remembered boxers.

“You’re so warm,” Alex said fondly, his hand gliding over his broad shoulders and the dip of his back.

 Michael smiled softly, his nose nudging against Alex’s before his tongue made its way into his mouth without hesitation. Alex tugged him closer and kissed him deeper, not quite ready to let him go. He didn’t think he’d ever be ready to let him go.

Alex wasn't sure how long they laid there just kissing as if they did this all the time. Maybe they could make it a new habit because it was just... nice. Nice to wake up and have him there and have full reign.

Michael was his roommate. They'd lived together for three years. How the hell hadn't this occurred to him before? And this... this wasn't even a stupid crush that he had because Michael was doting on him. He liked him. He *wanted this.

However, Alex managed to keep his expectations low despite his desires being high. They fell into bed the night before under the understanding that this was just a one-time thing, friends helping friends, they were already pretending to date and so why not? That was the precedent. Alex couldn't and wouldn't expect more.

"Do you know what today is?" Michael asked as he broke the kiss and slowly started leaving soft pecks down his neck. Alex snorted.

"Don't be cheesy."

"It's Valentine's day," he said anyway, "I didn't get you anything."

"I didn't expect you to get me anything."

"Well, that makes me a bad boyfriend," Michael hummed, lifting himself up just enough to look at him in the eye, "So what do you want?"

"You really don’t wanna ask me that,” Alex whispered, eyes training on his mouth. He put his hand on Michael’s cheek and let his thumb graze his bottom lip. Michael took a shaky breath.

“Why not?”

“I don’t know,” Alex said as he took a deep breath and watched Michael follow his thumb with his tongue, “Might make you fall in love with me.”

Michael huffed a laugh, smiling wider by the second. Alex liked the way it felt. He liked how all of this felt.

“Alex,” he said, shaking his head a bit. Alex raised an eyebrow but didn’t get to say anything before Michael started gravitating down. “Alex. Tell me what you want.”

Alex replaced his thumb with his lips, breathing him in. He arched his back into him and reveled in the feeling of skin on skin. How had he not wanted this before the weekend?

Simple, he realized after a few seconds of thought, he had wanted it before. He just didn’t notice that it was an option. And, it wasn’t. Not really. This was temporary. But, God, it felt good.

“This. I just want this,” Alex said, voice barely a whisper and somehow still a beg.

Michael, ever the obedient caretaker, slipped his hand behind his back while the other went to his knee and hiked his leg up onto his hip. Alex’s hand slipped into his hair and kissed him deeper. He swallowed every noise he made.

Alex had known he was gay for as long as he could remember. He’d hooked up with boys from all walks of life since he moved for college: pretentious young artists, bratty trust-fund babies, a couple of football players who weren’t out yet, and a rich 50-year-old who very clearly had a lot of experience. None of it held a candle to this, to Michael kissing him and grinding against him and choosing this over spending time making good impressions.

That almost made it more surreal, that he was choosing this. He could’ve woken up awkward, could’ve blamed it on the wine, but he instead kissed and touched Alex more. It felt like he was being lit on fire from the inside in the best way.

Michael moved his hand between them, palming Alex over his boxers with no shame.

“I can’t believe we, two adult queer men, didn’t fucking bring lube or more than the one condom you had stuffed in your duffle bag,” Alex groaned, feeling a bit lightheaded as Michael didn’t stop. He just laughed softly, rocking against him.

“It’d been a little presumptuous if we had, don’t you think?” Michael asked. Alex genuinely, from the bottom of his heart, didn’t give a fuck about being presumptuous anymore. “I mean, if you wanna try, we can‒”

“Nope.”

Michael laughed, “You didn’t even hear what I was gonna say!”

“I know you. Spit only works if you want it to hurt,” Alex said. Michael huffed a laugh, tongue flicking across Alex’s lips because that’s apparently something he thought was a calm and collected thing to do.

“Fair enough. But if you wanna‒”

“No, nope,” Alex laughed, slapping his hand over his mouth. Michael beamed at him. “I’m not so impatient that I’ll risk a trip to the hospital. And we still don’t have a condom, so I can wait.”

Michael twisted his head until Alex moved it off his mouth, favored the feeling of raking it through his hair. His face went all soft in response like a cat that sincerely wanted to be pet. Alex scratched his scalp for extra measure.

“Fine,” Michael hummed, “We can wait.”

And Alex was quite sure he was going to fucking explode at this point. Waiting implied it was going to happen again and not when they were in this little bubble where they were boyfriends, but when they got home and were back to normal.

“Let’s go take a shower,” Alex said softly, needing to stay busy before he got his hopes up too high.

Michael nodded and got up slowly, leaving him with a few more kisses before he climbed out of bed. He stretched up and Alex took in the shape of him. His muscular back, his long torso, his tan skin, his nice ass.

He was so completely and utterly fucked.

-

“Okay, wait, how do you do this?”

“It’s not hard.”

“Clearly it is because I have no idea how you make it look good.”

Alex was grinning so wide it hurt as he watched Michael through the mirror. Michael had taken ahold of the blow dryer in the middle of Alex drying his hair and did it for him, combing through it and everything. When it got the pair Alex usually just pulled it back into a little ponytail and ruffled what didn’t fit, Michael got that intense look on his face and his tongue stuck out of his mouth as he tried to figure it out. Alex was giddy as he tied it back, decided it looked wrong, and took it down over and over. 

“My hair is short, it’s not going to be perfect,” Alex said. When he’d gotten it cut the last time, they’d cut it to be chin-length (three inches shorter than requested) and he was still dealing with the consequences of not just driving down to Roswell to have Maria do it. “Just take your thumbs, try to get an even amount from both sides, and tie up the top half.”

“That’s what I’ve been doing.”

“And it’s looked fine. I’m gonna have to wash my hair all over again if you don’t stop soon,” Alex teased. Michael scrunched up his nose irritably and rolled his eyes. He took a deep breath and tried one more time. It looked nearly identical. “See? It looks fine.”

“How do you make yourself look so good? I’d be jealous if I didn’t get the benefit of looking at you every day,” Michael said. Alex rolled his eyes, but couldn’t deny the warm feeling that rushed through his system.

“Luck.”

“Mm, I believe it,” Michael hummed, moving some of Alex’s hair out of the way to leave a kiss on his neck. Soft and sweet and definitely not long enough. “Okay, okay, get away from me or I’m going to drag you back to bed.”

“See, that’s not going to convince me to get away from you.”

“No lube, no condom,” Michael recited, like a mantra that was more for himself than Alex as he took a backward step towards his bag. It reminded him that he was still in just a towel.

“Are you so boring that you can’t think of anything to do with those limitations?” Alex asked. Michael swallowed hard, took a deep breath, and turned around.

“It’s on days like these I ask myself, ‘Self, why have you let yourself be drawn in by lust and temptation? Is it not enough to admire from afar?’” Michael spoke wistfully as he dug through his bag. Childish giggles slipped through Alex’s mouth. “No, apparently, it’s not. I’ve been a respectful roommate and upstanding member of society, keeping my thoughts to myself for years and then I get one taste and I’m nothing but a useless sack of needing-to-pleasure-Alex cells. That’s it.”

“Years, huh?” Alex asked. Michael froze for a moment before he shook it off and pulled out a pair of chinos and a collared shirt. 

“No. I don’t know, maybe. Yeah. I don’t know,” Michael mumbled, dropping his towel. Alex bit down on his bottom lip and took a very careful breath, trying not to do something embarrassing like twirl around the room and sing I Feel Pretty at the top of his lungs.

Definitely feeling pretty and witty and gay at moment.

Instead of focusing on that‒because, wow, that’s a lot to focus on‒Alex took out his eyeliner and drew his wings a bit more bold than he had been the last two days. Riding on that high, he even flipped his septum down. If Michael thought it’d be a problem, he’d tell him before they got downstairs. Hopefully. One of Michael’s female coworkers had multi-colored hair so it should be fine.

He took a step back and looked over himself. Black checkered pants, a loose black button-up that was half tucked in and half out, his hair a Michael special. He looked good. He felt better.

By the time he picked up his phone, he realized he hadn’t actually texted Liz since The Before and she was probably freaking out. As told by her series of messages.

Liz: HELLO ALEX HE DID W H A T?

Liz: Do I need to get Isobel on his ass? 

Liz: Are you okay? It’s been a couple hours

Liz: Text me when you can and let me know if I need to come rescue you in the middle of the night

Liz: It’s the middle of the night, I’m going to bed, so I hope you don’t need saving.

Liz: However, if you don’t text me by tomorrow, I will assume you have been murdered and I will be filing a police report.

Liz: It’s currently 7:30 AM. You have until 10 before I assume the worst.

Alex: jesus liz

Liz: OH NOW HE ANSWERS 

Alex: I am in fact alive

Liz: What happened last night??? You went MIA 

Alex: ……….

Liz: NO YOU DID NOT

Alex: Listen. He’s really good at giving head.

Liz: I could’ve gone my whole life without knowing that but OH MY GOD

Liz: WHAT HAPPENED TO SELF CONTROL

Alex: Went out the door along with my dignity apparently

Liz: For real tho are you okay? That probably wasn’t great for your crush

Alex: I think it’ll be okay. I’m not keeping my hopes up or anything and I’m gonna have a real conversation with him once we leave, but for right now I’m content with him kissing me constantly

Liz: Oh shit it’s still going on?

Alex: It is still going on 😌

Alex: Remind me next time I go on a random trip with someone that even if I don’t expect to get laid I should bring condoms

Liz: omg Alex did you pay attention to sex ed at all

Alex: literally no I did not, half of it was no use to me

Liz: sigh. What am I going to do with you

“Alright, let’s go get brunch. Don’t let me have mimosas because if I drink at all, I can’t promise I won’t get myself fired,” Michael said. Alex slipped his phone into his back pocket to look at him, a grin easily finding his face.

“Aw, you look like such a little frat boy.”

“I am in a fraternity.”

“We don’t talk about that, it’s bad for my health,” Alex said, tilting his head back as Michael moved in and grabbed his hips. One hand moved up to his chin, holding him in place as he kissed him. “Can I have mimosas, though? I promise not to get messy.”

“You can have literally whatever you want,” Michael murmured against his mouth, leaving him one more kiss before he pulled away. “Let’s go.”

Somehow, going downstairs and parading in front of everyone as a couple didn’t feel any different than it had the first two days. They made small talk and ate good food and Alex drank two mimosas alongside Michael’s coffee.

“I can’t get over how cute you two are,” Alisha said, somehow having found her way to them again. Alex gave a warm smile despite wanting to slip and hide beneath the table at the sight of her. In her defense, so did the sight of everyone else. “You’re literally, like, glowing.”

“Well, what can I say? He just does something to me,” Michael said wistfully, giving Alex a face that said he was teasing. Alex held back a smile.

“It’s like you’re still in the honeymoon phase!” Alisha said. Alex almost laughed out loud that that. They kind of were in the honeymoon phase. It would just be drastically shorter than everyone else’s because it would end by the time they got home tonight.

That alone was almost laughably horrible.

“It’s easy when he’s got a face like that,” Michael cooed, reaching out to pinch his cheek. Alex laughed and leaned away only to be tugged back closer. 

It was going to be weird when Michael wasn’t attached to his side anymore.

After brunch, they were supposed to have a nature walk again, but before Michael and Alex could go on their way, Jeannie and Curtis called them back. A few other interns turned and looked, but they went on their merry way until it was basically just the four of them.

“Come walk with us for a bit, I wanted to show you two my favorite place,” Jeannie said, a big smile on her face. Alex locked eyes with Michael for a moment and then they began to follow.

“You know, Michael, I was going through all the supervisor notes that Khalil has for your group. You’re a standout. Very focused and hardworking, but I see it’s probably helpful that you have a strong support system,” Curtis pointed out as they walked. The two of them were much more appropriately dressed for a nature walk than Michael and Alex, but, in their defense, they just planned to go to the creek again. 

“Thank you, Sir,” Alex said before Michael had the chance to, “He deserves it.”

“I think so too,” Curtis said, warm and fatherly and Michael found Alex’s hand and squeezed, “You make a good team. I’ve watched how you know when to let the other do the talking when they’ll be better equipped. That’s very important if you want to climb ranks.”

Alex raised a suggestive eyebrow at Michael who just held onto him tighter. He rubbed the back of his hand with his thumb in hopes it’d help him calm down.

“Alex, when are you set to graduate?”

“This fall, if all goes well. Taking a couple of summer classes to help get there,” Alex said. Curtis nodded and looked over at Michael.

“And you’re set to graduate this semester,” he said‒not a question. Michael nodded evenly, eyes flitting to Alex as if looking for permission. Alex nodded back. “What’s the plan for after college?”

“Well, I already take piano gigs for some of the local schools’ choirs and give a few piano lessons to a few young kids, hoping to expand though. My kind of thing can pretty much go anywhere,” Alex said, knowing it sounded good. No big, painful uproot if he needed Michael in a different branch somewhere across the US. You know‒because to him they were together. Long term.

“And I’m just hoping to keep working for Disionic in any way I can,” Michael said. Alex squeezed his hand in approval.

“For how long, do you think?” Jeannie asked. Michael’s eyebrows furrowed and he looked over at Alex. He mouthed a ‘forever’ at him, watched him gulp, and smiled encouragingly. It was a big and false commitment. Big companies really liked it when they feel you’ve signed your life away to them.

“For as long as I can.”

“And you’d be willing to go to other branches if we needed you? We’ve got a branch in New York and Houston, but we plan to open another at some point in the next five years. And hopefully expanding in some other, more inventive work. Would you be interested in that, Michael?” Jeannie said.

Alex had always been aware that, when it came to things like this, there was an important balance between partners. Curtis wasn’t wrong in saying that a nice balance, knowing who needs to speak when, was important and helpful. Alex had been under the impression that while Jeannie was the warm one who was probably a fantastic hostess and enjoyed it, Curtis was the strong businessman who really only focused on the business part of things. Now, Alex quickly caught up to the realization that, while that may be true, Jeannie called the shots.

For a stupid second, Alex pictured him and Michael like that in a few years.

Funny how he spent his whole life wanting to get away from that environment and 1.5 hookups later, he was ready to sign up for a lifetime of being a good hostess.

“Absolutely, Mrs. Iverson. I-I’m obviously still learning how everything like this works, but I’m a fast learner,” Michael insisted. Jeannie laughed.

“I hope to watch you do that over the next couple of years,” Jeannie said, “Right, Curtis?”

“Nothing’s official yet,” he said, looking over at Michael with a fond smile, “But I do think there’s a more permanent spot for you in our business.”

Again with the squeezing Alex’s hand so hard it nearly hurt. 

“After you graduate, of course,” Jeannie tacked on.

“After you graduate.”

“Thank you so much,” Michael said, trying to keep his excitement to the bare minimum. 

Alex thought it was adorable though he didn’t know why he was so surprised. Michael had regularly gained favoritism from many, many people throughout his life. Teachers, bosses, baristas, the bus driver that would literally wait for him if he was running a few minutes late. Michael was an easy face to love and he worked hard and he was endlessly kind.

And each moment that passed Alex wondered how he’d been so blind to his own favoritism.

“Oh, and here’s what I wanted to show you,” Jeannie said as they started moving uphill a bit.

They stopped as they got to the edge, a cliff that overlooked a decent-sized body of water. It must’ve been where the little creek they’d sat by yesterday led to. There was a metaphor in there somewhere.

“This is where my Curtis brought me nearly 25 years ago now where he told me everything he wanted to do in the future and asked me to be a part of it,” Jeannie said, looking up at Curtis with a nearly disgustingly fond look. Alex wanted that. “I think it’s a good place to talk.”

“And, speaking of, Alvaro is calling,” Curtis said as his phone started ringing. He gave a polite nod and turned, immediately answering the call in Spanish. Alex was actually pretty impressed with his accent.

“Right, well, let me go make sure he places nice. You two have fun and make sure you come to sit by us at lunch, alright?” Jeannie said, waving goodbye as she followed her husband down the slope.

Michael and Alex didn’t speak as they waited impatiently for them to get out of sight and, hopefully, out of earshot.

“Alex,” Michael whispered, “Alex, I think I’m going to throw up.”

“What, why? Are you okay?” Alex asked, letting go of his hand to rub his back. Michael’s face, finally free of schooling himself for Jeannie and Curtis, was full of pure shock and disbelief. “Hey, this is a good thing.”

“I know it’s a good thing, it-it just feels really real all of the sudden. Like. Really real. Like, I don’t get it levels of real. I’m not supposed to have this,” Michael whispered, shaking his head as he looked out to the water. Alex took a step closer.

“What are you talking about? You’re the smartest person I’ve ever met and you’ve worked your ass off. You deserve this more than anyone,” Alex insisted. Michael shook his head.

“I’m supposed to still be barely scraping by in Roswell. I’m-I’m never supposed to get out. I’m supposed to become another statistic,” Michael said, looking over at Alex with furrowed eyebrows, “I’m only here because you gave me a place to live.”

“Shut up, I didn’t do anything. You would’ve found a way and you would’ve been right here with or without me giving you a place to live,” Alex insisted, “That was purely selfish reasons, too, I didn’t wanna live alone.”

“But Curtis was right. I-I get by because, like, a support system. I get by ‘cause of you,” Michael said. Alex again rolled his eyes.

“You’re giving me way too much credit here. You’ve got Isobel and Max and a whole group of friends. And back in Roswell you’ve got Sanders and Mimi and Arturo who would’ve done anything to see you thrive. And that’s not even counting the tons of people who gave you opportunities. Look, you’re definitely lucky and you could’ve very easily ended up stuck in Roswell without a little of that luck, but you’re also hardworking and smart. Playing the system is a part of this life we’ve been dealt, okay? And you’re playing it well,” Alex explained. Michael took a deep breath.

“You play it better,” he whispered.

“Will you stop making this about me?” Alex laughed, putting his hand on his cheek, “You’ve done great this entire weekend and clearly well enough for the last few months if Khalil talked you up that much.”

Michael stared at him for a long few seconds, silence. He looked tired and overwhelmed in a way he hadn’t this morning like everything had suddenly just hit him. Alex tried not to get worried about what else might’ve just hit him. He leaned forward despite himself and kissed his cheek slowly before pulling back, smiling in the most encouraging way possible.

“What if I don’t want to do it without you?” Michael asked.

Alex blinked once, twice, three times as he processed his words. He didn’t move away.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, we make a good team. And… And I like having this with you. I like doing this. I’m comfortable with you and I trust you and I’m not nervous,” Michael said, huffing a soft laugh as he looked away for a moment before looking back, “Everything else is new and scary and way out of my depth and, like, technically you are too, but you don’t feel like it. You feel safe. And I wanna do this with you. Charm the pants off of rich people and then have sex in rooms they pay for. Or in our own bed or whatever. You get the point.”

“Yeah,” Alex whispered, taking a shaky breath and he really thought about just stripping and jumping into the water below. He probably would’ve if he knew it was deep enough. “I think I get it.”

“I think I’ve been in love with you for a long time,” Michael said, then quickly looked at him with wide eyes, “That’s definitely not me saying our first ‘I love you’, I’m just, like, saying.” Alex laughed, his heart beating wildly in his chest as he nodded. “Thing is, I didn’t realize we’d be a good fit. Or that we’d be too risky and it’d be messy if we broke up. Now… Now I feel stupid for not noticing it before. You literally feel perfect to me, for me. That’s dumb. This is embarrassing. I just wanna kiss you and pretend I’m Robin Hood and do scandalous things like feel you up beneath the table while my boss sits across from us for, like, the rest of my life or whatever.”

“Michael,” Alex laughed, putting his other hand on his other cheek and just holding him in place, “Want me to say something even more embarrassing?”

“Yeah,” Michael said, eyes shining a bit more. He still looked overwhelmed, but it was a bit better. 

Alex took a deep breath and looked as serious as he could muster, looking into his eyes.

“Will you be my Valentine?” Alex asked. Michael’s face scrunched up and he laughed, grabbing Alex’s hips and tugging him closer.

“That was disgusting, boyfriend,” Michael said as they stood nose to nose. Alex was giddy with it. He didn’t have to get his hopes up when Michael was already there to meet them.

And maybe Alex had a shot at a future full of it.

“C’mere, boyfriend.”

Alex: something may or may not have transpired

Liz: Oh???

Alex: so, like, that little crush? Very big. Very reciprocated.

Liz: OMG. KNEW IT.

Alex: no you did not

Liz: Michael has literally been giving you heart eyes since before he knew he was queer. I so knew it. Isobel called it first tho 

Alex: and you said NOTHING to me???

Liz: As if you’d believe me

Liz: Besides I didn’t know if he knew yet or if he was actually willing to pursue so I wasn’t gonna make it worse

Alex: so rude

Alex: I’m gonna go make out with my boyfriend now and fantasize about being his housewife 

Liz: LMAO you could never be a housewife

Alex: no I’d hate it but that’s why it’s staying a fantasy

Liz: HAVE FUN

Alex: absolutely will

[bonjour-rainycity]

Double Heart | Chapter Twenty ~ Haldir

|previous part|

Pairing: Haldir x OFC

Rating: PG-13

Word count: 1650

Warnings: None

A/n Hi! Sorry, I know I’m a day late -- I have family in town so I’m soaking up all the time with them that I can. This one is short (and a lil fluffy/angsty), and this chapter and the next are kind of a rest before we hit the next act of this story! Sooo gear up! I’m excited!!! 

I shut the door behind Orophin and Lavandil.

Cosima flops onto her bed, staring at the ceiling. “That was awful.”

I make a noise of general agreement. I hadn’t expected my brothers to take the news happily, but I didn’t think Rumil would completely shut me out. I have no doubts that he will eventually come around, but his reaction is still distressing.

Cosima raises up on her forearms, looking at me in concern. “Are you okay?”

I nod, making my way towards her bed. “It may take some time, but I know my brothers. All will be well.”

She scoots from the middle to the far side of her bed and pats the space next to her. I accept the invitation, lying on my back at her side. Vaguely, I notice that her bed is much larger and comfier than mine. I turn to tease her about it, try and cheer us both up, but she’s fiddling with her fingers. I guess neither of us is feeling particularly lighthearted at the moment.

“What is it?”

She sighs, staring up at the ceiling rather than at me. I nudge her arm gently, trying to prompt an answer.

She bites her lip. “You’ve said that you can make your own choices, and I get that, but I’ve got to ask—are you sure? You don’t have to stay with me just because you said you wanted to. I know what you’re sacrificing, and you don’t have to—”

I cut her off, kissing her forcefully. She sucks in a breath and I use that to my advantage, drawing her deeper into the kiss. She recovers from her shock quickly though, and slides a hand up my chest in that way I adore and is slowly becoming familiar. I pull away but keep a firm hold on the side of her face. “Please push these thoughts from your mind. Whatever the future holds, I am in it with you. And a future without you? I don’t want it. It would be different, had I never met you, but the Valar blessed me. They brought an impossible woman into my life. And I have no intention of letting her go.”

The sadness in her eyes breaks, replaced with a look of tenderness that I work hard to memorize. I let the hand on the side of her face slide to rest on her hip.

She places a kiss on my jaw, taking her time to respond, aware that she has my complete attention. “If I had to wake up in a different world with no memories, I am immensely glad you were there. Being with you is worth all that I’ve left behind. Even if I did remember it, I would choose you.”

I exhale slowly, basking in her words. I’ve never been vulnerable with someone before — bearing my heart and hoping they don’t crush it — and every time I open my mouth to confess something to Cosima, there’s the fear that she will shut me down, that she won’t return my feelings. But her words just now, as well as her actions from the past few days, help allay my fears.

“It’s getting late,” she breathes, face mere inches from mine. “You could stay the night?”

My hand on her hip tenses. No, I remind myself. I should go back to my room. But the words that come out of my mouth are not what I told myself to say. “I would not be intruding?”

“No,” Cosima smiles, wrapping her arms around my neck. “I would very much like it if you stayed.”

We are both adults. If she wants me to stay and I want me to stay, then there’s no reason to leave. “Then stay, I shall,” I murmur, dropping my lips to press against hers.

She kisses me languidly for a while before her lips shift into a grin. I pull back with a raised eyebrow.

“You’re the one who has to get up and blow out the candles,” she declares, her tone full of mirth. “That’s really the only reason I asked you to stay.”

I snort, but push myself off the bed, headed for the first candle I see. “I knew it couldn’t be because you love me. That’s too easy.”

“And pull the curtains,” she adds, lifting the duvet so she can crawl underneath it. I watch her slide her eyes shut, smile still spread over her face as she tries not to laugh.

Cosima and I have slept in each other’s company before, and we will do so again for the three weeks of our journey to Lothlórien. But I can’t shake the feeling that this is completely different. It will be the two of us alone, in a bedroom, when we have acknowledged our feelings for each other.

But despite the nerves and the gravity of the situation, it feels completely natural to spend the night with Cosima. I long for her presence during the day, and the night is no different.

And with precious little time together, shouldn’t I seize on every moment?

I blow out the candle nearest to me. It darkens the shadows in the room. I extinguish the remaining candles, close the curtains, and then return to the bed. Cosima has thrown the covers back on what I suppose is my side, making it easy for me to climb in next to her. After the slightest moment of hesitation, I do so. I reach for her, wrap my arms around her and cross them over her stomach, then pull her against my chest. It reminds me of a variation on what I did our very first day of training, an action that caused me no small amount of distress. But now it seems there is no limit to the ways I can hold her, and I plan to explore them all.

Cosima chuckles, evidently pleased with this development. “You remembered the human way.”

“I am capable of adapting,” I respond, dropping my face into her neck.

Her laugh turns into a sigh when I begin a trail of kisses there. “I have a question.”

I hum, continuing my pattern. “Yes, my love?”

She pauses to beam at the phrase. When she speaks, the smile is still in her voice. “Rumil asked if we had bonded yet, and then when you said no, he said there’s still ‘time’. What did he mean by that?”

My lips freeze against her neck. I sigh, shifting to lie on my side and pressing on her shoulder so she’ll turn to face me. I figured we would need to have this conversation at some point, but I hadn’t counted on now. And it’s not the potential for awkwardness that makes me wish I could keep my mouth shut — no, we could get past that — it’s the fear that, once she knows there’s still technically a step we have to take in order for my soul to perish once hers leaves me, that she will end this.

But it is not right to withhold information from her so, with another deep breath, I explain. “He was talking about the bonding of the fæs — in the literal sense. But I love you, I am committed to you, and nothing can change that, so Rumil’s whole notion of ‘time’ doesn’t really apply here.”

Her eyes narrow as she zeroes in on exactly what I’m careening around. “Say there’s some wiggle room.”

“There’s not.”

“But if there were,” she presses, obviously not interested in letting this go.

I sigh. “Traditionally, elves have used sex as a way to facilitate the spiritual bonding of the fæs. That’s what constitutes an elven wedding — that’s what represents and solidifies the commitment. Since we have not had sex, Rumil thinks our fæs are not bonded, so there is time to break the commitment between us without it affecting me.”

She sits up, opening her mouth to comment.

I hurry to sit up as well and cut off her words before she can take this idea and run with it. “But our situation is different. The whole concept of the fæs bonding is not a blanket statement that covers every relationship — there is a lot of choice involved, we are not without agency. And I have chosen.”

She smiles somewhat sadly, letting her fingers drum over my knee. “I wish I was an easier choice.”

I catch her hand in mine. “I quite like where my choices have led me.”

She leans against me, pressing a gentle kiss to my lips. “I love you.” She shifts, lying down and tugging on my arm to pull me with her. “Let’s go to bed. It’s been a long day.”

I stretch out behind her, then twist the strands of her hair through my fingers. She’s silent, and I worry that, despite my efforts to reassure her, she’s still sad. I know she can’t help it, but I wish that we could leave all this struggle and moroseness behind. In my view, the future is set, my path is clear. Struggling over what that means will not halt the end, nor change it, so we shouldn’t waste time worrying over it. We should prepare how we can and then enjoy our lives together.

Cosima tucks her head into my neck and tangles one of her legs through mine. The action — so unexpected yet so natural — gives me hope that, soon, she and I can fall into a life together. Maybe Lothlórien is the key. Maybe once she can clearly see what our future looks like — a home, friendships, family, meals together at the end of a long day, exploring Lothlórien’s extensive forests and blue-green lakes, festivals, sunrises, all the wonderful things about my home, our home, she can allow herself to be happy.

And I will do everything I can to help her get there.

A/n Thanks for reading! Likes, comments, and reblogs are always so appreciated! Also, I think I made EVERYONE sad with that last chapter, I’m so sorry. But I LOVE that we all collectively love Rumil and want him to be happy forever, right? Soooo, c’mon, hit me with some happy Rumil headcannons <3

|next chapter|

|masterlist|

Tolkien tag list: @anangelwhodidntfall @eru-vande 

Haldir tag list: @tolkien-apologist @that-cute-stranger

Double Heart tag list: @lainphotography @themerriweathermage @thophil2941btw @kenobiguacamole @wishingtobeinadifferentuniverse @from-patroclus-with-love @boywivlove @ordinarymom1 @my-darling-haldir @sweet-bea-blossom @moony-artnstuff @sleepyamygdala @thranduilseyebrows

*Strikethrough means Tumblr won’t let me tag you :(*

[lovelylou]

since 2020 is almost over, i thought i’d share (some of) my favorite fics that made my 2020 a lot better.

[note: not all of these fics were written/published in 2020, although most of them are, there are some that are older, but that i’ve read or re-read this year]

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tastes like summer, smiles like may by outropeace

“Is this true?” Harry grabbed the beta by the shoulders. “Bryce, where did you hear that?”

“There’s rumors going around the castle,” he smirked. “stories about his beauty and his cold attitude. They know he is an omega only because of his scent, but he has never had a heat.”

“Do you know what this means?”

Bryce smirk grew into a big smile. “He can’t give you an heir.”

A cold prince, an alpha with nothing left to lose and a kingdom with a secret.

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But It's Useless by thinlines

“Hey.”

Louis was even hallucinating now. He closed his eyes.

“Hey, you.”

He chuckled wetly, head still leaning against the door.

“Can you get out of the way? You're blocking the door.”

He exhaled sharply before slowly turning around. His eyes fixed onto muddy Nike trainers before it traveled up to impossibly short jogging shorts. The yellow color was atrocious, simply ghastly.

“What happened to being polite, Harold?”

OR Omega Louis would never guess that he would be trying to hack into Alpha Harry's Wifi. That is until everything changes when he tries to get to know his enemy.

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haunted by the ghost of you by missandrogyny

He’s tall—that’s the first thing that registers in Louis’ head when he spots him, standing with his hands behind his back. Tall, with curly hair, staring at them with the widest, greenest eyes Louis has ever seen. And wait, are those dimples? Louis didn’t know ghosts could have dimples.

Because he’s definitely a ghost, this boy. At first glance he looks normal, standing there pigeon-toed in a band shirt (The Ramones, Louis can’t help but note incredulously), dark jeans, and some boots, with rings on both hands, and tattoos littering his left arm—a sleeve made of anchors and names and roses and other completely unrelated things. But he’s also a little bit translucent; if Louis focuses, he can see the outline of the furniture, the design of the wallpaper through him.

“Hi,” the boy—the ghost—says to Louis. His face shifts; somehow his dimples dig deeper into his cheeks. His eyes flit from Louis, to Niall, to Liam, and finally to Zayn, and his face goes from shocked to elated. “I’m Harry.”

At in that exact moment, standing between three of his best friends and staring at a (quite handsome) ghost, Louis can only think one thing.

Nick Grimshaw was right.

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On the Edge by zanni_scaramouche

Figure skating is as vital to Louis’ identity as his DNA, so when his skates go missing right before the last Olympics of his career there may be a meltdown only vanilla bath salts can fix. Well, that and the stupidly charming hockey player he met on the plane.

Harry’s too old to be the wonder kid and too young to be taken seriously in the NHL. As an alternate thrown in at the last second, he fights to prove himself on the national team at the largest sporting event known to man. Or he will, once he gets off this flight and can focus on something other than the fussy figure skater and his stunningly blue eyes.

A baggage mix-up skews both of their perfectly laid plans for gold, forcing the two to work together as the clock clicks towards the minute they’re expected to shine on centre ice.

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even the best laid plans by falsegoodnight

“Anyways,” Louis stresses, narrowing his eyes, “just let me say it and then rate how terrible of an idea it is on a scale from one to ten.”

“Alright,” Zayn agrees, sitting up expectantly.

“I want to ask Harry Styles to take my virginity,” Louis blurts, holding his hands out for emphasis.

The way Zayn’s eyes bulge is almost comical. “Negative infinity,” he says, voice choked. “Negative infinity times negative infinity.”

“Technically, a negative times a negative is -”

“Really negative infinity,” Zayn corrects himself, shaking his head wildly. “Louis, what the fuck?”

-

Or, Louis wants to have sex with someone and decides Harry is the perfect alpha for the job.

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The Compulsion to Find Love by Toomanytears

The most prestigious English third-level institution, Candling University, accepts omega students for the first time and Louis Tomlinson applies with bright eyes and brighter ambitions. There he encounters personal obstacles, traditional mindsets and a beautiful boy who inverts every prejudice Louis has ever known.

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Mine Would Be You by crinkle-eyed-boo (KimmieRocks)

Louis blinks his eyes open, his eyelids fluttering as the room swims around him. He takes several gulps of beer once he confirms that he’s definitely not hallucinating, that the very first portrait Harry Styles ever painted of him is hanging on that wall.

Louis stares at the wall, his heart jackrabbiting in his chest as he realizes that there’s not just one painting of him, there’s five, the portraits lined up like they’re some sort of storyboard depicting the rise and fall of his deepest love. His greatest heartache. A pain that cut him so deep that he left the fucking country, severing all ties with his life in New York, now suddenly surrounding him as if he’d never left.

Fucking shit motherfucker fuck.

Louis returns to New York City five years after he left it – and the love of his life – behind. He didn't intend to see Harry again, but fate has a funny way of pulling them together, whether they like it or not. After making a begrudging truce, they both start to wonder: Would it be so bad if history repeated itself?

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UN(RE)SO LVED. by daddyharrie

The ghoul boys are back, but this time around there are some unresolved feelings involved. Harry is a skeptic, Louis is not. Watch them go on their ongoing investigation into the question: are ghosts real?

Or, BuzzFeed Unsolved AU.

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Hate to Smoke (Without Me) by louhazpride

“For fuck’s sake,” he huffs, grabbing the pillow and pulling it on top of his head in an attempt to block out the banging coming from the other side of the wall.

It’s the third time this week that his neighbour has woken him up in the middle of the night with his little ‘rendezvous.’ Honestly, he's quite sick of it. There’s only so much sex he can bear to hear in one week and he has already hit his limit. If he wanted to listen to someone having sex, he’d turn to porn.

As if the noises weren’t enough, Harry immediately becomes aware of the faint aroma of weed filling his flat.

“I’m going to murder him.”

Sleep. Harry just wants one good night of sleep. However, his neighbour has a thing for headboard-banging-against-the-wall-sex every night. After a secret set-up and a bet, Harry may finally get the sleep he so much desires.

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Three Days in February by writing_practice

“We have to get out of here, outside,” Harry whispered, turning his hand in Louis’s grip to hold on and pull them both to their feet.

“And how do we fucking do that?” Louis hissed, carefully rising and pulling Harry to his feet before Harry could do it. His gaze darted to the front then back of the arena. “None of the doors are where they’re supposed to be.”

“What?” Harry looked around again too, couldn’t see any doors, only knew that they must be there, somewhere. “How do you know?”

Confusion slid over Louis's features.

“Because we’ve been here before, Haz. It’s the O2.”

The show. It must be the first night of their tour. They were too late; they were out of time.

Louis is cursed after a night out with the lads and the five have just three days to figure out what happened and how to break it before Harry and Louis both lose their sanity and maybe something more. Louis can hear everything Harry thinks and Harry isn’t sure he can keep his feelings for Louis a secret from his own mind.

Ridiculous amounts of banter and angst, a lot of Harry and Louis alone together, a healthy dose of OT5 friendship, and one very magical weekend.

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Coming Up For Air by stylinsoncity

It's a long plane ride to LA but sitting beside Harry makes time fly.

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I'd Give Up Everything Just Ask Me To by Rearviewdreamer

They don't usually exchange Christmas gifts, but this year is different. This year, Louis knows exactly what he wants to put under the tree to make his boyfriend smile. He just doesn't know how he's going to get it.

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bruise you like a peach by falsegoodnight

There’s two reasons Harry despises Econ.

The first is that it’s boring as fuck. The second reason is a bit more personal, a bit more focused in a way. As in it’s focused on one specific thing, or in his case, person.

His name is Louis Tomlinson.

-

Alternatively titled 'the peach fic.'

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Sometimes You Just Know by 2tiedships2

“Dear diary. Today is going to be a good day, and here’s why...”

“What are you doing?” Louis mumbled as he bit into a piece of toast.

“It’s been almost two years and today Harry Styles and Louis Tomlinson reunite. Louis is very excited about…”

Louis’ chair screeched along the kitchen floor as he flew up out of his seat, quickly grabbing the paper from Niall’s grasp. As he scanned the page he found it amounted to lines of nothing.

“What is this?” Louis asked again. “We’ve discussed how Harry Styles will never be spoken of in this flat. I don’t care how long it’s been.”

Niall snatched the paper from Louis and proceeded to draw a line across the page before writing.

“Today is the day that he-who-shall-not-be-named is coming to dinner.”

Or the one where Harry and Louis don’t believe in soulmates… until they do.

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eyes off you by soldouthaz

“Just promise me you’ll do whatever it takes to keep us all safe while we’re in there,” Liam says.

Through the crack in the door, Louis can just barely make out the broad curve of Harry’s back, the slope of his curls as they tumble down all sleep-soft and lazy, and the sharp twist of his arm - all leading down to where he’s got his pointer and middle finger crossed over each other behind his back.

“I promise,” he tells Liam firmly, “I promise.”

--

or; a charlie’s angels inspired fic where louis is the brains, harry is the charm, liam is the muscle, and niall drives the getaway car - and zayn is there, too. sometimes.

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Welcome to The Rivalry by 2tiedships2

“Welcome home!” Niall yelled, clapping his hands in excitement. “Isn’t it great?”

Louis looked between Niall and the house, unsure how to respond.

“I don’t understand,” Louis finally managed to say. “Aren’t we a little old to be living so close to campus?”

Niall scoffed. “You’re only twenty-four for fuck’s sake. There is still plenty of partying left for us to do. What better place than one street over from where a car was set on fire after the Michigan game last year?”

“Is there proof of that? Did the car have Michigan plates or something? Is there a photo I can send in a DM to Wolfie?”

As if on cue, a Twitter notification popped up on Louis’ Apple watch. He had tweeted again.

Or a reverse You’ve Got Mail au inspired by the Ohio State/Michigan rivalry. Featuring duplex neighbors, (kind of) enemies to lovers, and an anonymous Twitter feud between omega Louis and alpha Harry.

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Cold Little Heart by seducedbycurls

Louis is a soft omega with an abusive past and an alpha child

A few months after getting a divorce, Louis meets Harry, an ex-military alpha wolf that offers him something -odd.

In exchange for teaching him how to cook, Harry will babysit his son, Abraham

Louis really could use the help.

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[snarky-art]

My enchantix redesigns that I’ve had laying around for a while. I’m going through my computer to try and clear up space and came across some winx stuff. I haven’t done the wings for them still to this day in any finalized way because they are very intimidating to me lmao. Some info here on how enchantix outfits and fairy outfits work as well as the inspirations for the clothes for each of the characters below! I’m going to include some more individual design notes from my sketchbook later too.

In my version of the winx redo, all fairy transformations have to do with a sense of self to an extent. The more sure and secure of oneself one is, the more likely certain parts of the outfits are to carry over to the other transformations. For example: I have multiple transformations for Daphne that I’ve done, but there are a lot of traits carried over in the designs (her tirar, her color scheme, cut of cloth, etc) since she was always very self assured in who she was. She was Marion and Oritel’s daughter, future queen of Domino, and the keeper of The Dragon Flame and she was going to become as strong as she could for her people and the universe so she could use The Dragon Flame as best as possible. (I swear I’ll upload her stuff at some point they’ve been collecting dust for literal years now sskdjkjfla).

The same can’t really be said of the girls here, and that’s fine too. Aisha is the one with the most confidence in who she is and that shows here in the carrying over of her metal accents (arm bands, a metal ring at her waist, albeit with a jewel in it this time) and the cloth that goes across her chest and wraps around her waist.

Another thing that can influence the appearance of a fairy transformation is closeness with another individual. Aisha at this point already knows she likes Musa (I’m going to upload a post after this going more in depth on their relationship in my version) and her double buns are influenced by that since that’s one of the main ways Musa likes to style her hair (she also helped Aisha really perfect how to do the hairstyle and as that was one of the first thigs Aisha ever really did with a friend after Anne left when she was young and not including the pixies, so it holds a lot of sentimental value to her. Musa was the one who went out of her way a LOT more than anyone else to try and get Aisha comfortable with everything. The other girls did too of course but Musa just kind of gets how it feels to be alone more than they do so they really understood each other.) Musa in turn also has armbands like Aisha and some cloth hanging from the tie around her waist in a way similar to the cloth trail around Aisha’s.

Bloom also has similar armor to Stella because of this, since Stella is Bloom’s closest friend out of the 6 and is the one who introduced her to magic and what it can mean to be a fairy.

Enchantix in itself works basically the same as it does in the show, and as the main focus of it is to save someone from your planet so you can become a guardian of it (there can be multiple guardians for a homeworld too. I always thought it was weird that it was implied there can only be one. The guardian fairies of a planet act as a protective council of sorts. They are expected to place the priority of protecting life on the planet above all else and sometimes align themselves with royalty as advisors for things if they it is requested of them by the royalty, but they are expected to be willing to break ties with any allegiance if the leader is doing things that upset the balance of the planet and enact cruelty, not that guardians have always done that in the past). As a result, it is tied closely to the culture of their homeworld, or the culture that the fairy is from if the planet doesn’t have a largely homogenous one.

Musa is based off of Chinese and Japanese culture, which is a really broad statement I know since there is so much that goes into those countries, but I tried my best to have it line up with the clothes she wears in the show and it seemed to be similar to that (and obviously her homeplanet is clearly inspired by Asia). Similar to what her original skirt seemed to be, the pants are inspired by paper lanterns, and the upper shirt part is inspired by the tops of dresses during the late tang dynasty. The design of the belt she has, although I didn’t really do a close up of it, is braided similarly to shimenawa (a rope used in ritual purification in the Shinto religion). She has an open lotus blossom that her hair is in the middle of that holds her buns in place and her makeup is based off of the Tang Dynasty and the little hair piece she has acting as her tiara thing (all the girls had one so I tried to carry that over) is based off of Quing dynasty hair styles specifically but like, similar hairstyles were used in other eras too I just liked those specifically.

Flora’s is based off of Mexican style clothes. The top part is based off of Folklorico dresses and the petal style I used for it is based off of marigold petals, which are used to lead deceased loved ones to the families shrine during Day of the Dead. Her makeup is also based off of designs seen on calaveras. Her head piece is a flower crown which is now a common staple seen in women’s fashion during festivals due to Freda Kahlo and her hair is divided into two parts. The upper part is pulled back into a braid that has a vine weaved in with it, which I took inspiration from hairstyles down there that thread ribbon into the braids.

Aisha’s was a trip to figure out. So her homeplanet really is,, something. There’s some middle eastern influence (her name is also Arabic), her mom and her when she was younger wore some 1500s style renaissance clothes, and also they have a shaman that seems to be based off of African medicine men, and then also there are mermaids wearing European style armor, so I had to do some looking around to figure out what I wanted to do here. In the end I went with Moroccan and Zulu style clothing overall with a few other influences as well and tried to mesh them together. The headpiece and the sash/hood are based off of women’s head dresses in Morocco and the facepaint, arm and leg bands are based off of traditional Zulu attire. Cowrie shells are on the bottom of the leg and arm bands as they are used in Zulu attire in the same place as well sometimes, but also because a lot of African cultures see cowries as being representative as gateways to the spirit world (a lot of cultures have the spirit world and afterlife tied to the ocean). Her stack of necklaces are based off of the necklaces worn by the people Ndebele people of South Africa. Her shorts and top are rimmed with silver and the shape of the attire itself is meant to be athletic and practical for her. It is covered in fish scales. Her ears are a different color here than they were in her winx transformation also. That isn’t an enchantix thing but a biology thing I have made up in my head for Androsian people. The fins start off a light shade and then over time settle into a darker color, which is what it will permanently be.

Tecna’s outfit is ready for the cold. For the longest time we didn’t know anything about her homeworld except that it was cold, so, anyway Russia and Siberia lmao. The green lines on her body suit have light moving through them also which I just thought was a neat idea because technology is a thing. Her glasses aren’t a permanent part of the outfit also. They come out if she wants to concentrate her magic to do something very technical and intense. I thought it would be a nice way to carry over that faceshield thing she sometimes used in her winx form. Her physical features btw are based off of the Nenets people of Siberia.

Stella’s outfit is Greek based because I’m not original and I don’t know why almost all of us collectively agreed Solaria is Greco-Roman but we sure did do it. Maybe it’s because of the word Sol being in it.

Bloom’s is just,, European lol. Domino is a Renaissance Era place it feels like (probably because of her mom’s ermine stoat cape). So there. There are some similarities of hers with Daphne’s inadvertently (family ties can influence things sometimes too, which can be seen in the Bloom and Daphne comparison sheet on my blog), but Bloom doesn’t know that. When Daphne eventually does see her in her enchantix outfit during the time of or before the movie (which does happen in my version but with a LOT of changes. Daphne still talks to Bloom though and helps out like in the movie) you bet your bottom she takes a second to collect herself (happy to see the bond is strong enough that it did manifest physically in a way, sad because she remembers what it was like to once have that transformation and the general bittersweet longing for the time before shit hit the fan. I have so much stuff about Daphne I need to upload some of it soon).

So yeah! Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk:)

[wiypt-writes]

Stark Spangled Forever

A Very Rogers Christmas. Part 3- From Head To Mistletoe

Summary: It’s Christmas Eve and Steve has a little accident in the bathroom. Once the trauma is dealt with the Rogers family head off to visit Pepper and Morgan before coming home to settle in and wait for Santa. And Steve’s hell bent on unwrapping one particular present early…

Warnings: Language, smut (NSFW, 18+)

Pairing: Steve Rogers x OFC Katie Stark

A/N: The final part of my Stark Spangled 2020 Christmas special- A Very Rogers Christmas.  I hope you all enjoy and thank you for your support when my other blog was flagged as obscene. Next year SSB will be ‘relaunched’ through the new blog, and I will take the time to change anything that I didn’t quite like. I look forward to seeing you all there. But for now, I leave you with this hot mess and wish you all a VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS. Thank you for being as invested in Stark Spangled as me.

And to my Evangers… @sweater-daddiesdumbdork​ , @icanfeelastormbrewing​ , @southerngracela​ and @ohthankevans13​ I would NOT have got through 2020 without you. This one is most CERTAINLY for you girls. I love you 3000.

Steve groaned as he heard Rori's angry voice from the landing.

"Jamie, tell Stark to stop chasing Erica!"

"He's a dog!" Jamie responded. "It’s what they do, they chase cats."

"Well, stop him!"

"How?" Jamie's voice was punctuated by laughter. "It isn't like I make him do it!"

"Hold still." Katie warned Steve and he let out a sigh, his hands gently smoothing up the back of her thighs as she concentrated on ensuring the lines of his newly shorter beard were neat.

"Sorry, Doll." He muttered, watching her face as she concentrated, her green eyes following the trimmers as her right hand steadily guided them across his left cheek. "Listening to them argue is setting my teeth on edge."

"Baby, I only have the other cheek to neaten, then you can go and tell them both off." Katie stepped back to admire her handy work. "I was kind of hoping their Christmas Eve boxes would have kept them quiet for a little longer."

"Well," Steve turned his head to peek into their room where Harry was sat in the middle of their large bed, looking at the activity book he had gotten in his, "worked for him."

"Always does." Katie chuckled. "He's so well behaved compared to those reprobates."

They watched him for a moment or two before Katie reached up and moved Steve's face sideways so she could start on his right cheek, giving him a soft kiss as she did so. "You look incredibly handsome." She practically purred and Steve grinned, feeling his cheeks and neck grow warm as they always did when she looked at him the way she was doing.

Seventeen years and she could still turn his insides to mush with a single look.

"Yeah?" He asked, her lips still brushing his as she nodded. "Even though I've shaved the beard?"

"Well-" she kissed him again, "-technically you trimmed it, not shaved it. It's just shorter. But yes, I'd still find you devastatingly good looking without it, as you know."

Steve grinned, turned his head to allow Katie to finish and just as she had raised the clippers it all went horribly wrong.

There was a yell again from the landing and a moment or two later the door to their bedroom flung open, causing Steve to whip his head round.

"STEVE!" Katie cried out a warning but it was too late. As Steve turned his head to look at Rori as she barrelled through the door to their bathroom, he managed to catch his cheek on the clippers and he heard Katie gasp. He froze, looked at his wife and then stood hastily up to glance in the mirror and gave a groan. A large chunk of his beard was now completely missing from his right cheek. And he could tell as he looked at it that no amount of trimming was going to save it.

"How many times do I have to tell you?" He closed his eyes and took a deep breath as he turned to Rori and she swallowed, eyes growing wide as she registered the tone of his voice. It was deep but quiet, the voice he always used when he was pissed off. "You knock before you come barging into mine and your mother's room, Aurora."

"I'm sorry." Rori blinked, the use of her full name not passing her by. "But Jamie-"

"Don't wanna hear it."

"Yeah, but he-" "What did I just say?" Steve’s voice rose in volume as he glared at her. "I'm not interested in whatever stupid little argument the pair of you have got going on. It stops now. You understand?'

Rori stared back at her father, her face positively mutinous and Katie hastily turned away before she burst out laughing at the fact they were stood in identical poses, arms folded, feet apart as they engaged in the silent stand-off. Whilst Rori undeniably looked like her, she had so many of her father's mannerisms, all the kids did to be fair, and her middle daughter was a perfect blend of both the Stark and Rogers sass and stubbornness.

She was a nightmare at times but at others amusing as hell.

As Katie busied herself straightening a few bottles on the bathroom side she heard Rori give an exasperated sigh.

"Look, I'm sorry I barged in here okay? But Jamie really is being a pain!"

"Right now you're being a pain." Steve shot back somewhat childishly. "A huge pain in my ass."

"Language!" Harry chanted as he looked over towards his father, and that was it, Katie couldn't hold it any longer and she burst out laughing.

Steve turned to her, arching an eyebrow and she shook her head. "I'm sorry, Steve, but..."

With a groan Steve rolled his eyes. "I'm gonna go speak to Jamie, then I'll come back and sort this out." He gestured to his face before he turned and headed out of the room, calling to Jamie as he went. Less than ten minutes later both brother and sister had been told to quit it, Rori was in her room with the cat whilst Harry had wandered into Jamie's room and settled on a bean bag by his elder brother to watch Back To The Future. Flossie had, miraculously, slept through the entire scenario and …well, she was mourning the loss of Steve's magnificent beard he had sported for so many years.

"I can’t believe it." She whined. "Stevie, I wanna cry.”

Steve rolled his eyes, whilst he had to admit it wasn't exactly what he had planned, he wasn't as bothered about it as her. "It'll grow back.”

Katie eyed him shrewdly, cooking her head to one side. He'd come back from the barbers yesterday with a shorter cut than he had sported in a long time. It reminded her a lot of how he had used to wear it when they first started dating. Short on the sides, slightly messier on top. Coupled with his now smooth face, she had to admit, it did make him look somewhat younger, although you could still see the odd fleck of grey here and there spattered in his dark, blonde locks.

"You know, if I didn't know any better I'd say you were having some some kind of midlife crisis" She looked up at him and he snorted. "Although you gotta admit, babes, you're a bit late to the party age wise so to speak."

He stood up with a shake of his head and glanced at the mirror. He hadn’t seen that reflection in a very long time.

“Bucky’s gonna have a field day when he sees this.”

“Well, lucky for you he’s away with Jen and the family for the holidays so you won’t have to face him until New Year, same goes for Sam. Morgan, on the other hand…”

“She’s seen me without a beard before.” He shrugged before he turned and headed into the bedroom.

“Not for a while.” Katie followed him as they both left their room and headed onto the landing.

“Yeah, I know but surely it-“

He was cut off by a loud scream and then the sound of crying which erupted from Harry as he stood in the doorway to Jamie’s room.

“Hey.” Steve frowned and made his way over towards the toddler “Buddy, what’s…”

But Harry continued screaming and he backed away from Steve, running into Jamie’s room and hiding behind his big brother who looked at him, then to his dad, a puzzled expression on his face. Steve glanced at Katie who was also frowning as she made her way into Jamie’s room and crouched next to their son who was gripping onto his brother’s sweater for dear life.

“Harry? Baby boy, what’s wrong?” she asked him softly, smoothing his hair back.

“That man!” he cried, his voice wracked with sobs “Who...where’s Daddy?”

“Oh, Honey!” Katie chuckled, picking him up. “That is your daddy!”

“No!” Harry screamed, shaking his head and burying his face into her neck. Steve stood dumbfounded in the doorway of Jamie’s room, absolutely stuck for words. He felt awful and completely helpless as Katie tried to soothe their son but Harry wasn’t having any of it.

“It is Harry!” Jamie spoke, looking at his brother who glanced at him, then to Steve and then continued crying.

“Steve, sing the song.” Katie spoke suddenly as she was hit with an idea. “The one you always use to sing him to sleep.”

“Erm…” Steve cleared his throat, before he gently began to croon the song he’d sung to all of their kids as young children. “Would you like to swing on a star…” his voice croaked a little, as he found the pitch to the Bing Crosby song, “carry moonbeams home in a jar.  And be better off than you are. Or would you rather be a mule?”

At the sound of Steve singing Harry stopped crying and peeked across the room at him, his hand fisted in Katie’s hair, his cheeks tear stained, but his expression was almost curious now, not fearful.

“A mule is an animal with long funny ears, he kicks up at anything he hears” Steve continued as Katie rocked Harry a little in her arms, nodding to Steve as he tentatively walked into the room. “His back is brawny but his brain is weak, he's just plain stupid with a stubborn streak. And by the way, if you hate to go to school. You may grow up to be a mule”

Harry studied Steve a little more, his sniffles subsiding slightly.

“Or would you like to swing on a star, carry moonbeams home in a jar, and be better off than you are, or would you rather be a pig?” Steve was just wondering how many more verses he was going to have to go through but thankfully, at that point, Harry gave a hiccup and held his arms out towards him. With a smile, Steve took him from Katie and held him securely, looking at him as he reached up and squished Steve’s cheeks with his little hands.

“Hi Daddy.” He whispered, wrapping his arms round his neck and Steve chuckled a little in relief, one large hand falling to the back of his son’s head as he kissed his cheek which was wet with tears.

“Hey, pal.”

“What’s going on?” Rori appeared, Erica in her arms, purring loudly as she scratched the kitten behind her ears.

“Oh, nothing.” Katie looked at her, “Harry got a little upset that’s all.”

“Why?”

“Because I shaved my beard.” Steve explained before he snapped playfully at Harry’s finger which was prodding his nose.

“Well, what did you do that for?” Rori scoffed.                  

Steve looked at her as she gave a dramatic roll of her eyes before she spun on her heel and left heading back to her room. Steve turned to Katie and Jamie, the pair of them stifling laughter.

“Anyone got a seven foot block of Ice I can take another seventy year nap in?” he grumbled.

**** As was tradition on Christmas Eve, they celebrated with Pepper and Morgan. This year it was Pepper’s turn to host so just before 11am they all piled into the car, the roof rack packed with presents and made the hours trip upstate to the lake-house, Emmy and Peter set to meet them there.

As they walked up to the house, Katie carrying Flossie, Morgan came out to greet them stopping dead as she looked at Steve.

“Huh.” She mused, taking in his clean shaven face.

“Yeah, yeah, get it over with, Moo.” He rolled his eyes.

“I’m not laughing.” She shook her head seriously, looking at him from dark brown eyes the exact same as her fathers, the familiar Stark nose accentuating her face. With a sad sigh she walked over to Katie and lay her hand on her Auntie’s arm. “I’m so sorry for your loss. That beard, well it must have been hard to take.”

At that Katie burst out laughing as Steve let out a groan as he spotted Emmy doubled over on porch, howling.

“Did you tell Em what happened?” he looked accusingly at Katie who shrugged.

“I may have mentioned it before when she called.”

Steve rolled his eyes as they trudged inside, stomping their boots on the mat to get rid of any excess snow, a wave of loud chatter hitting their ear the minute they did. The room was warm, fire blazing and dotted around stood Rhodey, Happy, Pepper, Peter and his Aunt May. Greetings and hugs were shared, Happy taking the opportunity to coo over Flossie as she was much bigger than the last time he had seen her some months ago, and Katie hugged Pepper tight, accepting the glass of champagne that was passed to her.

As was the usual tradition, Pepper had laid on a glorious buffet which went down a treat. And once the food was eaten, Jamie and Morgan both wrapped up and headed out to give Gerald the Alpaca some of the vegetable trimmings that Pepper had saved for him. The younger kids settled in front of the TV to watch a film, Emmy and Peter both happily choosing to sit with them and Katie took a moment out of the wonderful madness to watch as Steve was actively engaged in some discussion with Rhodey, both men laughing and joking. With a smile she then turned her attention to Happy who had his arm looped around May, the pair of them chatting to Pepper as she topped their glasses up with a bottle she plucked from the fridge.

It had been this way for almost seven years now, how they spent Christmas Eve, and whilst Katie loved being surrounded by this patchwork, extended family, she couldn’t help but notice the huge Tony shaped hole.

A hole which, like the one he had left behind in her heart, failed to get any smaller as the years passed.

With super stealth skills that Natasha would have been proud of, Katie silently made her way from the room, grabbing her jacket and headed out, her feet crunching through the layer of snow that lay on the ground as she walked across the lawn and down to the small jetty from which they had laid Tony’s Arc Reactor onto the lake the day of his funeral.

She always felt a sense of peace being here, like there was some part of Tony still present. And to be fair, there was. Said Arc Reactor had sunk to the bottom of the lake once the wreath had rotted. But it was more than that, it was the only place she still felt truly close to her brother and she understood why. It was because this was where he’d gotten everything he’d ever wanted, a daughter, a wife, a home…the very things he’d sacrificed his life for.

With a sniffle, Katie stood at the edge of the small jetty and sighed, looking out over the partially frozen water. “Merry Christmas, Tone.” She whispered, wiping her eyes as her tears trickled slowly down her cheeks.

Back inside the house, Steve looked around for his wife only to notice she wasn’t there. Knowing instantly where she would be, he excused himself from the conversation and grabbed his coat, making his way down to the lake. Sure enough, he saw her stood at the end of the jetty, but before he could cross the snowy lawn towards her, he spotted Jamie and Morgan making their way back from Gerald’s little hut. Jamie stopped, spotting his mom and he turned and said something to Morgan, who nodded, and the pair of them trudged towards her. As Jamie reached his mother he gently slid his arm round her waist, and she turned towards him, dropping a kiss to his head, her arm draping over his shoulder. She then smiled at Morgan, her other arm looping round her niece and the three of them stood still for a moment, Katie’s cheek leaning on the top of Jamie’s head.

Steve gave a little smile, once more the pride and love welling in his chest at how damned thoughtful and willing to look after Katie his son was. As a cold wind whipped against his cheeks he took a deep breath and let it out softly, where it fogged in the air in front of him.

“Merry Christmas Tony.” He said gently before, satisfied Katie wasn’t alone, he turned round and headed back inside.

****

They stayed at Pepper’s until just early evening, when Katie suggested they head home as they still had a few things to do before they got the kids settled and tucked up for the evening. Rori opted to ride home with Emmy and Pete, much to Jamie’s delight, and at just gone five they headed back where the usual Christmas Eve chaos began. In true Rogers-Stark tradition, everyone had a new pair of Christmas Pyjamas to wear, as purchased by Katie, and once showers and baths had been had they all dressed in them and met in the den, Emmy and Peter roaring with laughter at Steve’s which bore the slogan ‘you Jingle my bells’. Rori’s were sparkly and pink, with a unicorn wearing a Santa Hat, Jamie’s were a replica of an Elf Uniform, Harry’s had a huge Christmas pudding on the front, Flossie’s little romper made her look like a reindeer and Katie had gotten Emmy and Pete matching Santa and Mrs Clause ones.

Once the tradition of singing a few carols around the piano was done, Rori insisting Katie played ‘Santa Baby’ three times,  they moved into the living room, the adults with a glass of wine or beer, kids with a hot chocolate and then began the usual discussion about which film they were going to watch.

“Do we have to?” Jamie groaned, as Rori demanded The Muppet Christmas Carol.

“I thought you liked this one?” Katie looked at him as she stood in front of the DVD rack.

“Yeah but we’ve seen it like a thousand times already this year.” He sighed. “Can I go watch It’s a Wonderful Life in the other room?”

“Erm…” Katie took a deep breath and Steve could tell she was trying to keep her face from falling at the fact Jamie didn’t want to sit and watch with them, which would break their tradition for the first time, and he gave a little cough and leaned towards Jamie who was sat on the chair next to the couch.

“Let’s watch The Muppets, and when they’ve all gone to bed you can stay up with and we’ll watch your choice.”

“Really?” Jamie looked at him.

Steve nodded “You keep telling me you’re older now so, well, you can stay up a little later. Just don’t mention it, okay?”

“Sure.” Jamie grinned, before he cleared his throat. “It’s okay mom, I changed my mind.”

Once the film was on, Katie settled down on the sofa, tucked under Steve’s arm as he pressed a kiss to her head, her hands lightly trailing shapes over his arm which was crossed over her chest, holding her close to him.

They laughed and sang their way through the movie, the only movement being Pete and Steve taking it in turns to keep the adult’s alcohol supply topped up and once it was done Rori jumped up, grinning and exclaiming loudly that it was time to leave the treats out for Santa.

Katie and Steve both headed into the kitchen where Katie handed Rori the large plate that Steve had painted years ago, which identified spaces for each separate item, and now sported Flossie’s name alongside the other four and with a loud instruction for Rori and Harry to calm down, Steve handed, Harry a carrot before he grabbed a mince pie and a bottle of beer for Santa- well, he can’t have milk in every house, that just gets boring- and he made his way into the living room where Rori placed the plate down in the middle of the coffee table and they set about arranging the treats.

But Rori wasn’t happy.

"Daddy it's wrong!" "What’s wrong?" Steve looked at Rori and she pointed to the plate.

"There's only one carrot."

"Yeah, for Rudolph."

"But what about Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner and Blitzen?" Steve blinked as she dropped her hands to her hips, giving him a look so reminiscent of the one Katie shot him when she thought he was being a dumbass. "It isn't all about Rudolph, Daddy" "Well, we haven’t got any more carrots, Princess." He pondered "You think the reindeers would like broccoli?" "Don't be ridiculous." Rori shot back but at that point Peter interjected "They do, Titch. I left it one year. They ate the lot" Steve didn't miss the way Emmy looked at Peter as he nodded seriously to Rori, his eldest daughter’s eyes wide with pride and love and he bit back the smile threatening to spread across his face. "It’s true Rori." Jamie added, playing along. "They like most veg." "Ooh, okay! I’ll go ask momma for a selection." She exclaimed, running out of the room. Steve turned to Pete, clapping him between the shoulders "Nice one Queens." He then shook his head "Why the hell is leaving just one suddenly a problem this year?" "Yeah that might be our fault." Emmy grimaced a little "We watched the Christmas Chronicles earlier at Auntie Pep's" "Figures." Steve sniffed. "I suppose I should be thankful she's being so kind. She does love animals." Jamie snorted "Yeah go tell that to Mom now little miss Diva is in there demanding half the veg prepped for dinner tomorrow." Steve groaned "Ahh shit, Honey!" He quickly exited the lounge and headed to the kitchen in time to see Katie stood, frowning as Rori hastily explained the issue. "So I need some broccoli, and cauliflower and...erm...what else is there?" "Potatoes, cabbage, green beans and sprouts." "Yeah. Sprouts!" Katie looked up at Steve, mouthing what the fuck is going on and he snorted as she shook her head and moved to the pans on the stove. She pulled a few pieces of each veg out, placed them in a bowl and handed it to Rori. "Thanks Momma!" She grinned, carefully carrying her precious reindeer food from the room. "Nine reindeer huh?" She looked at Steve as he laughed and crossed to room to give her a kiss. "Reckon you just saved Christmas Eve, Mrs Rogers." "Hmmm." She grinned, her arms sliding round Steve's neck. "How fast do you think you can get them into bed?" Steve arched an eyebrow as his hands landed on her hips. "Why? You got plans?" "Yes." She deadpanned, causing him to chuckle. "We got another film to watch with Jamie first." Steve's fingers flexed against Katie's hips and she gave a sigh. "I forgot about that. God, why does he have to keep growing up?" she grumbled, and Steve laughed as she pressed her face into his chest."I wish I'd known last year it was gonna be the final time he believed in Santa." "Well, I'm kinda pleased that the fat, sack carrying bastard doesn't get the credit for all our hard work with at least two of them." He shrugged causing Katie to snort. "The amount of effort we go to only for him to take the plaudits takes the piss." "Steven Grinch Rogers." Katie looked at him as she pulled away. "You sound like Tony."

"Well, he didn't always talk crap." Steve smiled and Katie grinned as he gave her another soft kiss. Together they left the kitchen and headed back to the lounge where the kids were now dotted about. Harry was sat on Emmy's knee looking at a book, whilst Rori was busy prodding at her tablet showing something to Peter. Jamie was snuggled with Stark and Erica on the chair and Katie had to smile, the kitten had taken a liking to her rescuer, much to Rori's irritation. "Okay kids." Katie clapped her hands. "It’s getting kinda late and I'd hate for Santa to arrive and not be able to come in so..." "Bed time!" Harry grinned, jumping up and off Emmy's lap, the young woman scoffing indignantly. "If only you were this enthusiastic about going to sleep all the time."  Steve mused, swinging Harry up into the air, smoothing his hair back, planting a kiss to his cheek. "But we don't get presents all the other times when we wake up." Rori shrugged. And Steve couldn't really argue against her logic.

***** Jamie fell asleep halfway through It’s A Wonderful Life, and when the film finished Steve gently woke him up where he stretched and let out a yawn before he rubbed his eyes, coming to. He stood up and bid them all a good night, and by the time Katie went upstairs to tuck him in, he was once again crashed out.

Steve, Katie, Emmy and Pete then all settled in the kitchen as it was the furthest part of the house from the bedrooms. Katie pulled a charcutteri board from the fridge as Steve cracked open the Asgardian Bourbon for him and Pete, Katie and Emmy remaining on the champagne. With Christmas songs playing in the background they played a few games of Go Fish, which grew louder and more competitive the more drink they consumed. Eventually, when Pete claimed the last game, Steve tossed his cards down with a disgusted grimace.

“Outrageous.” He shook his head, laughing as Emmy nudged him hard in the ribs.

“You’re such a sore loser, dad!” she scoffed and he looked at her, arching his eyebrow.

“Carry on and Santa won’t be leaving you anything tonight.”

“He isn’t anyway.” Pete grinned, “She’s firmly on the naughty list.”

There was a pause as Steve turned his head slowly to look at him and Pete flushed furiously, recoiling in his seat as he realised what he’d just said as Katie tipped her head back, letting out a huge laugh.

“Aaaaand that’s our cue to leave.” Emmy stood up. “Come on Pete, you fucking moron.”

“Language!” Steve shot out, pointing at her and she replied by flipping him off.

“See you in the morning.” She smiled, giving both her parents a hug and a kiss before she headed out of the door, Pete simply smiling sheepishly as she tugged him behind her and across the garden to the cabin.

And then it was time to set out the presents.

Katie began to clear the table as Steve headed out to the garage to retrieve the gifts from their hiding place, setting them out in the lounge into separate piles before Katie came in with the smaller items she’d hidden in the under-stairs storage for the stockings which were hung over the hearth. Half an hour or so later they stood back to admire their handy-work, new bikes for Jamie, Rori and Harry taking centre stage on their piles, whilst Emmy and Pete’s gift was a little smaller, as keys to an apartment in London didn’t really take up much room when all was said and done.

“I can’t believe it’s Christmas already.” Katie sighed, looking around. “I mean this time last year we were getting ready to have Floss, and when I think back about everything that’s happened since then…”

“It’s been a heavy year.” Steve nodded, his arms wrapping around her as he hugged her from behind. “But we made it. You’re amazing, you know that.”

“Team effort.” Katie leaned back into him, “I couldn’t have done it without you.”

Steve gently moved one hand and reached up to sweep her hair away from her neck. His fingers softly brushed her skin and she gave a little shudder as he dropped his head, his lips kissing softly beneath her ear.

“Gram mo Chroi…” he whispered and she let out a soft sigh, his lips kissing up to her jaw line before she turned and ran her hands up his chest, bringing them to rest on his shoulders.

“Still?” her eyes were bright a she peered up at him and Steve smiled, nodding, knowing full well she was referring to the first time he’d said those words to her on Christmas Eve some seventeen years ago.

“Til the end of the line, pretty girl.” he dropped his head to give her a kiss, one hand on her hip, the other cradling the back of her head as he held her to him, his mouth locked on hers. Soon she felt both of his hands on her back, then they slowly slid down her body, cupping her ass.

“So, about those plans you had…” he muttered against her lips and she smirked, pulling back a little.

“Thought you might fancy unwrapping one of your gifts early.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah…” she grinned. “I mean I’ve been a very good girl, Santa.”

“That’s debatable.” Steve’s smirk grew even wider. Although the sooner I can get out of these hideous pyjamas the better!”

“You know they’re gonna have to go back on after, right?” she laughed as she reluctantly untangled herself from him so she could turn off the lights on the tree and the garland over the hearth. “None of that lot are knocking tomorrow morning before they come in to wake us up.”

“Remind me again why we have no lock for the door.” Steve asked as he took her hand and they walked up the stairs before they took a quick peek in on their kids. All four were sleeping soundly, Stark curled round Jamie’s feet, Erica round Rori’s head on her pillow.  As Katie gently pulled the door to Rori’s room shut, she turned to Steve who pulled her back towards him, his hands sliding down and grabbing the top of her thighs, hauling her off her feet, causing her to giggle.

“Now, where were we Mrs Rogers?”

“Debating whether or not I’m on the naughty list.” She grinned, her legs locking around his waist.

“I think that’s a given, Doll.” Steve smirked, kissing her as he carried her into their room. “When it comes to being naughty, you’re very good at it.”

Katie let out a chuckle as he dropped her onto the bed, wasting no time as he stripped her bare, before he dispensed of his own pyjamas, falling over her, his hands running through her hair as he looked at her.

“You’re beautiful.” his lips ghosted hers, noses bumping and she smiled against his mouth.

“You’re not so bad yourself.” She whispered before he kissed her again, deeply and slowly, the desire and love flowing between the pair of them was evident as Katie let out a soft whimper, her back arching a little into the kiss which broke a moment later as Steve trailed hot, open mouthed pecks across her jaw line to that spot below her ear. He watched carefully, Katie’s facial expression forming into the one he knew so well as she sighed, his mouth dropping down her neck to her collar bone, his teeth gently grazing over the skin.

His hand trailed down her side, tracing the curve of her hip, the pads of his fingers barely touching her but it was enough. She started to clench her legs together as she bucked her pelvis up and his other hand gently reached up, curling around her jaw as he turned her head back to look at him.

“Patience.”  He instructed, his voice a deep, quiet chuckle. Her eyes widened and she swallowed, a whimper escaping her mouth as he kissed her again, his tongue sliding over her lips before it tangled with her own, grazing the roof of her mouth. He broke the kiss again, but this time their mouths stayed pressed together, each breathing the other’s air as his hand moved down over her stomach and gently parted her folds. Katie moaned as he softly ran his fingertips up and down across her slick, his touches soft, teasing nowhere near enough to satisfy her at all and he knew that. He kept his strokes feather-light, just enough to keep exciting her, coaxing more and more wetness from her as his mouth moved down her neck, sucking at the hollow before he moved then to her breasts. His tongue lapped at her nipples in turn, teasing them to hard peaks slowly, as his fingers were working her and she trembled underneath him, the subtle touches not nearly enough.

“Steve…” she let out a choked whisper of his name that was almost a sob. “Please.”

At that he pushed one finger inside of her, curling against her spot, his thumb gently stroking over her clit. Katie’s back arched violently off the bed and he moved again, his mouth back on hers. She responded by kissing him back, and as the kiss grew in intensity so did the pace of Steve’s fingers.

This was torturous pleasure for Katie, Steve just toying with her as he wished. The fire was burning in the pit of her belly, but it was like the low, dull burn of an ember which was waiting to burst into flames. And it was driving her wild. But, as always, he knew just how and what to do and sensing that she was reaching her limit he picked up the pace a little, inserting another finger insider her as he continued tracing circles on her clit. Her back arched off the bed again, and her core tightened before she gave a strangled, low groan which died in her throat as a wave of pleasure washed over her, her legs growing stiff a little before she stilled, her breathing deep, breasts heaving in the dim light of the lamp.

Steve didn’t give her a second’s reprieve. His mouth was back on hers, both large hands cupping her face with a strong grip as he rather unceremoniously nudged her legs apart with his knee. As Katie bent her legs to accommodate him he shuffled forwards, and she reached down with one hand, grabbing at his solid cock, guiding it to where she needed him most.

He slid into her easily, his hands gripping into her hair as he rest on his elbows which were planted either side of her shoulders. His thrusts were deep, slow, controlled, each roll of his hip forward brushing against that spot inside of her. It felt so fucking good that Steve was in no rush for any of this to end, enjoying the fact he was loving his wife in a way only he could. Their bodies were moulded together in the most intimate of dances, Katie’s moving slightly with Steve’s as his hips drove into her, lips pressed together in a barely there kiss, mouths open, as he pressed his forehead to hers.

“So good,” He whispered. “Always so good for me, sweetheart.”

Katie sighed back, it was all she could do as Steve gave a small whimper, his head pressing further to hers as her hands slid up his back, tangling in his hair. As her nails dug lightly into his scalp, Steve tipped his head back a little bit and gave a harsher thrust into her making her cry out a little, her hands tightening around his blonde locks.

He repeated his action, barely pulling back an inch, rolling into her as opposed to thrusting and she felt the familiar, tingle brewing in her belly and upper thighs before with a final silent cry she bucked underneath him, her walls clamping down on his dick as she came, her entire body going rigid before she sagged back underneath him, utterly boneless.

Steve picked up the pace a little, chasing his own release, his mouth back on hers, his groans gathering volume as his hips increased their momentum. With a dirty grunt, which he stifled into the crook of her neck, he came hard, and the world felt like it was completely tipping on its axis as his hips slowed to a stop and he dropped down, pressing his weight onto his wife.

Neither of them moved for a while. The room was silent bar the deep, ragged breathing from the both as they lay still. Katie could feel Steve pulsing inside her as the final throes of his orgasm subsided before he lifted himself a little, his mouth seeking out hers as her fingers danced down his neck.

The kiss was soft, his hands once more cupping her face, thumbs softly stroking over her cheekbones as he pressed his forehead to hers, his nose gently sliding against hers as he pulled away ever so slightly to look at her.

“I love you,” his hands brushing her hair off her face as he kissed her again, enjoying the feeling as her lips curled into a smile against his, “from your head to your mistletoes”

At that she burst out laughing, her head falling back further against her pillow as she looked at him, her eyes shining as she shook her head slightly.

“Your dad joke game is strong, old man.” She snorted before she moved her hands from where they had been stroking the nape of his neck and cupped his face in the pads of her fingers. “I love you too, jingle balls included.”

At that Steve gave a bellow of laugher which she hastily stifled beneath her hand so as not to wake their children. As his chuckles subsided, he gently wrapped his fingers around her wrist and kissed her palm.

“Merry Christmas, Sweetheart.” He smiled, letting go her arm as he dropped his head.

“Merry Christmas, Soldier.” She whispered, before his lips captured hers once more.

[smileyjaeminies]

What if there was something more?

Synopsis: A trip with your friends is enough to tip the balance you had between friendship and love. How will you cope with spending every waking moment with someone you’ve been smitten over for years?

Word Count: 9,1 k

Genre: friends to lovers’ au!, angst

Warnings: fighting, cursing, drinking, extreme sports (cliff diving, bungee jumping)

Member: Jungkook, ft. Taehyung and Jennie of BlackPink

A/N: This work was commissioned by a very special person. You walked into my life only recently, and yet I feel like I’ve known you forever. Let’s meet a lot and stay for a long time. Thank you for requesting, I really hope I did your vision justice.

    A small breeze played with your hair as your suitcase rattled behind you. A laugh bubbled from your lips to the sound of Jennie and Jungkook complaining about one thing or the other, your eyes feasting in the beautiful scenery. Did you just call an airport beautiful? Maybe.

  You were elated, finally arrived after a long plane ride to one of your favourite cities in the world: Venice. You were giddy with excitement, ready to explore the city and uncover its secrets with your three best friends.

  “We need to find the bus stop for bus 13” Taehyung announced, juggling a map and a trip advisor in his hands.

  You all looked around, trying to find the correct stop when Jennie announced, “There! Over there!”

  Not waiting for your confirmation, she led the way, stopping only when you arrived at the stop.

  “10 minutes. Great!” Taehyung said as you all settled down.

  You half sat on your suitcase, trying to be patient until the bus arrived. The task was a hard one, for your insides were screaming at the bus to be quick and your leg was bouncing up and down in anticipation.

  “Not a fan of waiting are we?” Jungkook joked, pulling you away from your thoughts.

  “You’re one to talk!” you snapped back.

  The boy threw his head back with laughter, clearly not able to answer back. Indeed, Jungkook was one of the most impatient people you knew. He liked things done his way, quickly and efficiently. He had taken things ‘to fix’ out of your hands more times that you cared to count, from helping you re-decorate your room, to opening beer and water bottles for you.

  “That’s my girl.” He said, messing with your hair.

  You struggled in dismay, calling out for Taehyung’s help. He was quick to come to your rescue, pushing Jungkook off of you and leisurely dropping his arm around your shoulders.

  “I need you all to behave. Jennie, this goes to you to!” Taehyung said sternly.

  “Hey, don’t drag me into their shit! I barely did a thing! Come to think of it, who died to make you leader?” she asked.

  “All the planning me and Y/N did! You both were really no help at all!” Taehyung said, exasperated, pointing an accusing finger to both your friends.

  “Hey, that’s not fair, I was there, I helped!” Jennie said.

  You couldn’t help the chuckle that escaped you, so you had to answer Jennie’s glare with an apologetic look.

  “Jen, you know I love you but the only thing you did that night was eat our stock of chips and salsa and drink soju. Hardly much help” you said, breaking into another fit of laughter.

  This time, the rest of your group joined you, Jungkook even giving Jennie a playful shove.

  “Okay, okay, I admit defeat. And I will behave as long as you all do!” she agreed.

  “Deal!” you said, placing your hand in the middle.

  Your friends soon followed suit, your hands placed one over the other.

  “To a great trip, with great company” Jungkook said.

  The smile on your face grew even more as you broke away, the bus you were waiting for finally arriving. After getting your tickets and taking care of your suitcases, you made yourself comfortable in a narrow seat next to Jennie, who immediately announced she was going to take a nap. She was now laying on top of you as you listened to some music and watched the scenery come and go from outside your window.

  The boys were sleeping too and the bus ride was peaceful, giving you some time to calm your nerves and think. You buried the thought of this being your last one deep in the back of your head. Yes, uni was over, all of you graduated and ready to start ‘real lives’. But that didn’t mean a thing. Right?  

  Soon enough, you realized you were only a few stops away from your destination, so you began waking the others up. Jennie was awake after a little shake and Jungkook was only half asleep in the first place. It took all of your efforts combined to wake Taehyung up, just in time for you to get off the bus.

  Once again, you found yourself with your suitcase in your hand, but this time you were walking through the narrow passages of a city you had been enamored with for years. If you were being honest, you hardly expected your friends to follow you to this trip, but you were glad that they did.

  Taehyung was still acting as your guide, maneuvering through the streets with ease. You followed him blindly, your attention entirely on the beautiful architecture and the busy streets.

  “And if we turn here…” you heard him mumble, followed by a scream that sounded like ‘eureka’

  “We’re here, my little troublemakers!” he announced, leading you to a two-story house.

  “You rented a house?” Jungkook asked, confused.

  “Technically, it’s an Airbnb.” You informed him.

  You knocked on the door, as the house owner should be expecting you inside. Soon enough, a man in his early forties emerged from the inside of the house.

  “Ah, you must be Kim Taehyung” he said, looking at Jungkook who was standing next to you.

  You suppressed a laugh as Jungkook pointed to Taehyung who was standing a little further back.

  “That would be me, sir” he said.

  “Oh, I’m sorry for assuming. Nevertheless, come in, come in, make yourself at home!” he said, almost pushing you inside the house.

  “I am Francesco, and I’m going to leave for you here, keys and my phone number. Call me anytime, for anything, from directions, to restaurant recommendations, to the sink breaking!” he said.

  “Is the sink very likely to break?” Jungkook joked.

  “No, my boy, not at all” his face falling, his hands hanging on his sides in an awkward manner.

  “I was merely joking sir, I’m sorry if I offended you” Jungkook rushed to explain.

  The man seemed to calm down then, regaining his smile as he waved a hand in Jungkook’s direction, his words already forgotten.

  “Please kids, call me Francesco. And let me give you a quick tour of the house while we’re at it!” he urged you on.

  True to his word, he gave you a full tour of the house, even showing you a small nook that worked as a garden. You talked a bit about your plans, and Francesco was very excited to hear about them, even taking a look at your map and giving you advice about which buses to use.

  At this point, you, Tae and Francesco were alone, the other two tucked away in their rooms. Soon enough, he took his leave giving you some recommendations for restaurants and disappearing inside a yellow Fiat.

  You closed the door behind you as Taehyung entered the kitchen, pouring himself a glass of water. He looked at you over his glass as you took a seat spreading the map in front of you.

  “That was some amount of information, huh?” you asked.

  Tae only chuckled, settling down next to you. He glanced at the map, only to set it aside a minute later.

  “We need to get to a convenience store to get some things for our breakfast. Or we just skip breakfasts altogether and eat brunch every day.” He said.

  Another round of planning later, the plan for the following days was crystal clear. You had moved to the couch, Tae’s head laying on your lap as you watched Italian television without subtitles, merely guessing at what was said. Jennie joined you at some point, looking refreshed after a shower. She took the armchair, letting her long legs dangle on its side as she scrolled through her phone.

  A couple of hours passed like that, which made you wonder where Jungkook was. Too curious not to take a look, you left the living room, taking the steps two at a time to reach what would become Jungkook and Taehyung’s shared room. You knocked softly on the door, pushing it open when you heard no sound come from inside.

  Jungkook was sat at a small desk his laptop opened in front of him, his hands typing furiously across the keyboard. Your face fell, your heart dropping inside your chest at the sight.

  “Kook. We said no work on the trip” you said, your voice small.

  He turned to look at you like a deer at headlights, his hands dropping flat on the desk. He was caught at the act and there was no escaping it.

  “You promised.” You said again.

  “It’s just… Just a few emails I swear, nothing else, I just didn’t want them to pile up-” he was saying, but you’d heard enough.

  You shook your head, leaving the room without bothering closing the door. You rushed to hide inside your own room, catching a glance of Jungkook coming behind you and slamming the door. You sat on your bed, your chest moving rapidly as you tried to get your thoughts in order.

  Jungkook had become somewhat of a workaholic in the last few months. You knew his job was really important to him, even more important that after graduation, he was promised a promotion. You were proud of him of course, happy he had achieved his goals. But it all came with a price.

  He had become withdrawn, standoffish, his texts getting shorter and shorter. He barely had time for any of you, your hangouts getting scarce and even Taehyung who he lived with, only saw him for a few minutes at a time. There was always something to do or something going on, somewhere to be or a deadline to meet.

  It took every bit of effort from all of you to convince him to come to the trip with a single condition. No. Work. Yet there he was, hiding in his room and answering emails on the very first day. Was it that hard for him to have some time for you?

  Your train of thought was cut short as you felt weight being placed on the small bed. You kept your eyes closed, knowing who it was by the soft smell of mint that graced the air.

  “I’m sorry” he said, keeping his voice low.

  You gave no reply, hoping that ignoring him would send your message loud and clear: you were disappointed. He settled in the silence, lying next to you without really touching you.

  “Y/N, please. I said I’m sorry” he tried again.

  You were determined to ignore him until he provided with a better explanation. The hand over your head helped you, because you were sure that with one glance at him, you’d break.

  That’s how it always was with Jungkook. A sorry, some puppy dog eyes and a big hug was all it took for your anger to evaporate. But not this time. This time you would prevail.

  “Look, I know I fucked up. Just please, don’t give me the silent treatment. Let’s talk about this.” He said, placing his hand over your arm to bring it away from your face.

  You let him, dropping your hand on your side and looking at him.

  “I want your laptop” you spoke up.

  “My laptop?” he asked, perplexed.

  “Yes. You’re going to give it to me and I’m going to keep it for the rest of the trip.” You stated.

  Jungkook turned to the ceiling and you could almost see the gears inside his head turning.

  “Okay. But we won’t say anything to the others.” He said.

  You gave it some thought, then nodded at his request. You looked at the clock that sat on your bedside table, only to realize it was almost 8 o’clock.

  “Let’s go, it’s dinner time!” you announced, pulling Jungkook off your bed.

---------------------------------------------------------

   Ah... Yes. This is it. You thought as you floated on the water’s surface. How could you describe this feeling? How could you put in words the relaxation and tranquility the sea brought you? You allowed it to do all the work for you, the buoyancy of the water carrying your body and letting it float. Half of your head was still submerged, your ears blocking out all sounds but your breathing. You concentrated on it, your eyes fluttering closed as you felt your muscles releasing the tension they were holding.

  You had spent the last few days exploring the city, visiting museums and galleries, archeological sites and buildings. Jungkook’s laptop was safely hidden in the drawer you kept your lingerie and you hoped he hadn’t looked for it. Today was beach day, a day Jennie made you snuggle in the perfect schedule you and Tae constructed because “you needed relaxation”.

  If you were being honest, she wasn’t exactly wrong. Although your heart leaped every time you explored the city or visited a gallery, your feet ached, getting overworked. So beach day it was, and now you were more grateful to Jennie than you’d ever been.

  You sighed, your mind throwing away needless thoughts as you enjoyed the feeling of the waves running under you, in between your fingers and your toes. You felt your hair float behind you, forming somewhat of a halo around you.

  The relaxation was broken as you heard your name urgently called out. Your eyes flew open, only to shut tightly the next second as a huge weight was pushed on your stomach, dragging you down in the water. Your breath hitched, causing you to shallow some water. Your lungs were burning, your body going on overdrive as you swam to the surface.

  You greedily swallowed breaths of air, coughing and spitting water. A pair of hands were holding you up, as you struggled to compose yourself. You felt dizzy, trying to keep breathing evenly to calm yourself down. When your breathing came back to normal, you realized Jungkook was the one holding you, your own hands safely clasped around his neck. He and Taehyung were laughing, which helped you connect the dots in your head.

  “What the fuck?” you screamed at them.

  “The idiots jumped us!” Jennie screamed, exasperated.

  You pushed Jungkook away from you the best you could, angrily throwing some water in his face. The boys were still laughing when you started swimming towards the shore. You were mad, their little joke causing every breath you took come out labored and your insides to burn.

  You got out of the water, finding the sunbed on which you had left your things and draping your body across it. You fished around your bag, looking for your water. You gulped it down hungrily, which helped ease down the pain inside you and offer you some comfort. Laying back you closed your eyes, trying to control your anger. It was just a joke, right?

  You heard Jennie plop down on the sunbed next to yours, soon followed by the muffled chuckles of the boys. You pondered throwing them an angry glance, but ultimately decided against it. There was no use in pouring oil in the fire.

  “I’m so done” you heard Jennie mumble next to you.

  You agreed with a hum, putting on your sunglasses and trying to forget what happened. The boys settled down next to you, talking animatedly between themselves as you and Jennie soaked up the sun.

  Minutes passed and you were suddenly aware that someone was blocking the sun. You opened your eyes, turning to find the culprit only to realize it was Jungkook.

  “Can I help you?” you asked with an attitude.

  He took a seat on the sand next to you, his face obnoxiously close to yours as he studied you without speaking.

  “You’re mad” he stated.

  You scoffed, turning on your back and burying your head between your arms.

  “Hey” he said, pulling at your arm for your eyes to meet his. “I’m sorry”

  You suppressed the urge to laugh at his face. He was awfully sorry these days, wasn’t he? At the same time, you decided to let your anger go. This was your last chance, your last trip, few stolen days before you had to return what had become your realities.

  “Whatever” you said with a smile. “You’re blocking the sun, Jeon. Get out”

  Jungkook graced you with a toothy grin before pulling you on your feet. With one swift movement, you were draped across his shoulders and you were running towards the water. You squealed and struggled against him which didn’t seem to faze him, his strides sure as he flung you into the water.

  This time you were prepared, so you held your breath, your burning body gladly meeting the water. A mischievous grin grew on your lips as you swam to the surface. Jungkook was laughing and you were too, now able to stand in the water. You walked over to him only to find him in a moment of vulnerability, his eyes closed as he laughed. Your movements were quick, pulling him in the water with you, submerging his head and keeping it in.

  At that moment, Taehyung surprised you, pulling you away from Jungkook and throwing you some feet away. You were giggling as you fought playfully, Jennie not taking too long to join in the water fight.

   You were still laughing loudly when you existed the water, completely exhausted.

  “God, my stomach hurts, that was a workout” you whined.

  “That’s because you’re weak” Taehyung joked.

  You gave him a hard shove, which made him stumble on the sand. Another round of laughter found you cleaning up in the beach’s showers as you all piled in the Mini Cooper Jungkook had insisted on renting for the trip.

  Finally back in your little home, you each took turns to properly shower as you and Jennie fought over what to get for dinner. Ready for a night out and about, you decided to ditch the car and walk to a restaurant Jennie had found on Craigslist.

  The night was filled with the sounds of your laughter as the conversation led to all of you reciting stories of your childhood. As you were leaving the restaurant, none of you felt quite ready for the night to be over.

  So, you stumbled across the streets of the city, looking for an establishment fit for the occasion. Soon enough, you came across a decent looking club that wasn’t packed with people. It seemed like the best combination.

  You and Jennie made straight for the small dance floor as the boys brought drinks. Taehyung handed you your drink, twirling you once around yourself for good measure. Talk subsided due to the loud music blasting over your heads but you stuck together, dancing and drinking the night away.

  Ready for another round, you broke away from the group, finding a comfortable seat on the bar and waiting for the bartender to notice you. You were placing your order when you felt someone stand next to you.

  He ordered something in Italian, turning to grace you with a smile. The man seemed to be around your age, tan and, admittedly, very handsome. You returned the smile and he asked you something in Italian.

  “Oh, I’m sorry, I don’t speak the language” you told him.

  “No? I could’ve sworn you were born and raised in Milan? Italian blood runs in you, ragazza” he said.

  “Maybe I do have some Italian blood after all! I do love the country, we’ve been here for a couple of days already and I don’t think I’ll ever be ready to leave.” You told him.

  “We, you say. Travelling with family? Or a special someone?” he asked.

  You smiled at his question, clearly aware of his intentions. “Neither. Just friends”

  As if on cue, you saw Jungkook walking up to you. You smiled at him, momentarily not hearing what the man was telling you, your attention on him. His gaze was closed off, his steps sure but urgent as came to stand next to you, one hand circling around your waist in place of a greeting. You felt yourself gravitate to him as you often did, getting comfortable under his arms, the feeling of his chest moving up and down as he breathed, huffs of air fanning your hair relaxing to you.

  “The friend I was telling you about” you said to the man, motioning at Jungkook with your head.

   At that moment, the bartender returned with your drinks. You looked up at Jungkook, who looked as if he was about to start shouting.

  “Kook, you okay?” you asked in a low voice.

  “I will be once we get out of here” he told you.

   You nodded at him, waving a little as a goodbye to the man you chatted with. Instead of joining the others like you expected, Jungkook led you to a corner of the bar. The music was still very loud, but it allowed for some small talk. He pressed himself on you in a way he had never done before and you tried not to think about the goose bumps that raised on your skin.

  “Why him?” he asked.

  “What are you talking about?” you answered with a question of your own.

  “I don’t want you looking at other men like that” he said.

  “You’re being ridiculous” you said, shaking your head and trying to push him off of you.

  You reply didn’t sit well with him, for he pulled you back in your previous position. Your back hit the wall with force, almost knocking the wind out of you. You shot him an incredulous look but his mind was too preoccupied to register it.

  “I don’t want you looking at other men like that” he repeated. “Only me”

  His words made your breath hitch at your throat and you felt like a ton of ice cold water had been thrown over your head. Your eyes shifted between his, as your mind struggled to register his words.  

  “I’ve always, always been here and you…” he said, making your heart leap at your throat.

  “Jungkook, what are you saying?” you said, regaining your voice.

  The music, lights and people were making everything too much for you to process. His eyes were set on yours in a way that showed you he truly meant his words. You were about to speak up, when the words died at your lips.

   “Here you are! I’ve been looking everywhere for you” Jennie announced, giving an end to the staring contest between you and Jungkook by pushing him off of you and linking your arm with hers.

  “Tae is just paying the bill. Time to get back!” she said, smiley as ever, leading you to the exit.  

  On your way back, you stuck close to Jennie, letting her do all the talking as you brushed her off as just being tired. Your mind was hazy, your thoughts running wild at the sheer possibility that Jungkook could be…

  Then again, would it be so absurd if Jungkook were in fact in love with you? You were close, closer than you’d been with a boy before and there had been several instances where, if you didn’t know better…

  But did you know any better? All the time you were walking with Jennie, you registered the boys walking a few steps behind you, just out of earshot, talking in hushed voices. You had to gather all your courage to glance back at them. You were met with Taehyung’s moving look, alternating between you and Jungkook. Something seemed to stir in him when he caught you staring, making all his attention turn to the boy next to him as he started talking quickly.

  Well aware of the big plans in store for you the next day, you played your ‘I’m tired’ card once again, hiding under your covers. However, sleep didn’t agree with you as you tossed and turned for hours. At the same time, you were aware that the boys were still downstairs, safely away from hearing distance.

  Your thoughts were running, and every time you felt yourself relax, sleep run away from your grasp once more. Your muscles were tense as your hands came to rub at your face again and again. You tried to get rid of your thoughts, longing for sleep but alas, it stood far out of reach. It was only when you tried timing your breaths in time with Jennie’s some hour in the night that you finally felt yourself drift away into dreamland.

------------------------------------------------------

  A hand was shaking you awake, a voice screaming over your head. Your eyes flew open, only to find Taehyung’s face hovering over yours. Once he realized you were awake, he wasted no time to shower your face with kisses, from your head, to your forehead, your cheeks and your nose.

  You giggled under his ministrations, hearing Jennie gag in the bed next to yours.

  “No matter what you do, you aren’t getting out of this. We’re bungee jumping today, Tae” you told him, your voice still groggy from sleep.

  “How dare you think that I, Kim Taehyung, would even dream of missing this one in a lifetime experience with my best friends??” he asked, throwing a hand over his heart, as if to show how your words hurt him.

  You laughed at his antics, pushing him to the other end of the bed so you could get up.

  “You fear of heights did! Now, coffee!” you announced, pulling on some flip flops and rushing to the kitchen.

  As you entered the room, you felt your smile falter. Your eyes met with his, making you quickly look away, your hands finding solace in the coffee pot as you looked for a mug.

  “Good morning” he said behind your back.

  You mumbled an answer, your heart beating fast, your back still turned to him as you looked for something to eat to mask your awkwardness. You brought the bowl of cereal to the table, screaming telepathically to Jennie to make her way downstairs quickly.

  “Rough night? You look like you didn’t sleep well” Jungkook tried to strike up conversation.

  You decided to let him. It’s not like you’ll be able to hide from him for long.

  “It’s just the way Taehyung woke me up. Once I get my dose of caffeine and I’ll be ready to go!” you said.

  “Oh. I thought…” he said, his voice trailing off.

  “Jungkook? What is it?” you tried to get his attention back to you, for his mind seemed to be elsewhere.

  “I think we need to talk. When we get back from today” he said finally.

  “If Tae doesn’t die on us, sure” you said, trying to joke.

  His expression didn’t falter and you were almost intimidated by the serious look on his face. Your body moved on its own accord, your hands moving to place themselves over his own.

  “Hey. We’re okay. We are going to talk soon” you told him.

  You offered a reassuring squeeze, which seemed to help him snap back. He intertwined his fingers with yours, a small smile growing on his face. After a few moments, he got up.

  “I’m going to get dressed. See you in a few” he said, placing a small peck on the top of your head as he left the room.

  Your heart did summersaults in your chest as you struggled to keep your expression neutral. The smile on your lips was evident however when Jennie entered the room. She didn’t openly question it, only looked at you weird, raising her eyebrows.

  You wrapped up breakfast quickly, keen to be on the road sooner rather than later. You piled in the small car once again, Jennie working as shotgun and, consequently, designated DJ. Your job in the back was to comfort Taehyung, hold his hand and assure him that everything would turn out okay.

  Arrived at your destination, you felt Taehyung stick to your side as Jennie slowly came closer and closer to you. One look was all it took for you to communicate to Jungkook that he needed to check you in while you took care of your friends.

  Taehyung was trembling and Jennie seemed to regret her breakfast as an instructor led you to a side room to help you put on your gear and give you the necessary instructions. When you were all set, you agreed that you’d jump one at a time, Jungkook first, followed by you, Jennie and lastly Taehyung.

 You stepped out to the platform for the first time and you were almost taken aback by how beautiful the scenery was. A small river, (a creek?) was flowing under you as rocks fought to overcome trees, causing the scenery to be mixed.

  “How are you not scared?” Jennie asked you.

  “Who said I’m not? I just really want to do this with you” you told her, emphasizing your words.

  She took in your words, nodding a little as you all gravitated closer to each other. There weren’t a lot of people around, but because it wasn’t your turn yet you didn’t want to be in anyone’s way.

  In front of you was a couple, who was talking with the instructor in a lively way, evidently very excited for their jump. You watched as they hugged each other, the instructor tying them up in the correct position. 3, 2, 1… And they were off, dangling upside down over the valley.

  Two voices sounded at once as your eyes found Jungkook’s. You really thought in the same way, huh. You chuckled, Jungkook answering with one of his toothy grins.

  “Excuse me”, you asked your instructor, “Could it be possible that we do that, after we finish our individual jumps?”

  “Two pairs then?” she asked.

  “No!” all four of you said in unison.

  The instructor laughed at that, weighing you up.

  “Then my guess is you along with the first jumper?” she asked.

  “That would be me, and yes, that’s right” Jungkook said, coming to stand next to you.

  She nodded, taking a quick look at the schedule in her hands.

  “Well, seems like today isn’t too busy, we’ll be able to fit you in.” she told you.

  You jumped in excitement, you and Jungkook high-fiving in victory. You thanked the instructor, only for her to inform you that it was already your turn.

  Jungkook eagerly stepped up, almost bouncing on his feet as the instructor started tying him up to the wires. They exchanged a few words and Jungkook turned to wave at you, even giving you a thumbs up. Your phone ready in hand, you zoomed in his face as he smiled at you before jumping.

  You heard his cries, reaching frequencies you didn’t know he could as you laughed away from the microphone, recording his fall. The wires were raising him back up when you were called to the edge of the platform.

  Nerves started kicking in as you handed the phone to Jennie. You pushed it all away, plastering a huge smile on your lips, disregarding your trembling hands. Your heart was beating at your throat as you half registered the instructor’s words and directions.

  “Smile at your friends and then get ready” he told you.

  You turned around, finding Jungkook had rejoined the others. You waved, mouthing ‘I’m shaking’ to Jennie who just shook her head.

  “Don’t be scared, it’s amazing!” Jungkook urged you on, giving you the courage you needed to turn around.

  “Countdown with me, okay?” the instructor asked and you nodded.

  1, 2, 3. You were flying. Your pose was bad, you were screaming without even realizing, but you were flying, cutting through the air into complete emptiness. Your heart still beat rapidly as they were pulling you up. You enjoyed the view, nature running wild around you.

  Your feet wobbled when they placed you back on the platform. The adrenaline rush was slowly but surely fading and you didn’t know if you had it in you to stand up. Your eyes met with Jennie’s terrified stare, making you get up and walk up to the others, never breaking eye contact with her.

 “You can do it! I know you can! Just jump!” you urged her on.

 Jennie gave on curt nod, before stepping out into the void. She screamed with all her might, cursing at you and Jungkook as she fell, still half screaming as she was pulled up.

  In an instant, your arms were around Taehyung’s neck, whispering soft words of encouragement in his ear. Jungkook was softly massaging his shoulders, throwing his own two cents in and urging him on. He reluctantly walked over to the edge of the platform, talked to the instructor, watching closely as every piece of wire was being attached to his body.

  “This is safe right? I can do this?” you heard him ask.

  “Tae, you’ve got this!” Jungkook urged him on from beside you.

  Jennie joined you, whispering how much she hated you, but still offering her support to Taehyung.

  “We’re a set deal, Tae! If I did it, you can do it!”

  The countdown was quick and Taehyung was screaming to the top of his lungs. You laughed at his fall, still screaming and babbling all the way down. You were ready to collapse on the bench, when Jungkook took hold of your hand.

  “You ready for round two?” he asked, eyebrows moving up and down.

  “Oh my god, yes!” you almost screamed, repressing the need to jump up and down.

  You were called onto the edge, given a set of new instructions as you were told to hug Jungkook tightly at the waist as he did the same, your eyes barely able to look over his shoulder, his head resting easily on yours. When you were all tied up, all that was left for you was the countdown.

 1, 2, 3… And you were flying again. You screamed in Jungkook’s ear as he did the same to you, holding him tighter and tighter. You barely had time to look at the scenery, burying your face in the crook of his neck, feeling borderline terrified. He whispered soothing words in your ear, kissing the side of your head and telling you how good a job you’d managed.

  Safely set on the platform, you felt a few tears escape your eyes as Jungkook held you. You wiped away your tears, laughing softly at your random reaction.

 “I’m just so happy” you whispered, only for him to hear.

  He patted your head, running a hand softly through your hair.

  “You make me so happy, Y/N, you really do. Thank you for doing this with me.” He whispered in your ear.

  You just then realized how close you were. With one small motion, your lips would be on his. Your noses were brushing as you tried to control your breathing, stopping your tears for good.

  “Let’s go back to the others, okay?” Jungkook asked.

  You nodded and he was quick to help you to your feet, guiding you to the others. Your arms wrapped around Taehyung’s torso as you gushed over how brave he’d been. Somehow, the hug turned to a group hug, as Jennie snuggled to your side, Jungkook on her other side.

  Your heart felt like it couldn’t take any more, such a roller coaster of emotions and so much happiness seeming unreal to you. You savored it, hoping your heart could remain strong for a little while longer, even if it had to crash at the end.

-------------------------------------------------------

  After your big bungee jumping excursion, you knew that you all needed a big meal to fill you up. Jennie once again served as your provider, leading you to a beautiful sea-side restaurant.

 With stomachs full of food and hearts lighter than ever, you returned to your home, leaving the afternoon free for all of you. You ultimately decided to watch a movie, which you abandoned only halfway through, with Jennie and Jungkook drifting off to sleep.

  You excused yourself, walking outside to the small nook Francesco had showed you on your first day there, book in hand. Slowly, the sun set over the horizon, light getting scarce and making you set your book aside. You half drifted off, your mind replaying the events of the past few days.

  You enjoyed the quiet, needing some time to yourself to recharge after being stuck to the hip with the others for so long.

  Soon enough, you heard someone making their way over to you. You could tell it was Taehyung, his bare feet making no sound as he walked over to you.

  He laid beside you with a small groan falling from his lips. Once he was next to you, he sighed in contention, making you mirror his actions. He got comfortable against you, your hips and legs touching in a way that was intimate but not too overbearing.

  It was easy. Almost too easy. But then again, everything with Tae was easy. Smiles and laughs, tears and weakness, blurting out your deepest fears or your most precious secrets. You trusted him and he trusted you. Your dynamics were easy, like a river flowing through a valley.

  “Do you know any constellations?” you asked out of the blue.

  He took a few moments to reply, making you turn to face his side profile. His eyes were moving frantically, taking in the clear night sky as your thoughts drifted, thinking how easier it would be if you were in love with him instead.

  Only you weren’t.

  “Someone once told me the night is dark and full of terrors” he said.

  “Kim Taehyung, did you just quote ‘Game of Thrones’ at me?” you asked, laughter bubbling from your chest.

  The popular show had been a bone of contention between your group for a long time, with you and Jungkook totally enamored by it and Taehyung and Jennie cursing it for becoming so mainstream. But it seems, after many years you’d at least gotten Tae to come around. Interesting.

  “Maybe I did… Nothing you can do about it now.” He said, playfully pinching your side, making you squirm and laugh some more. “But seriously, how can you tell them apart? They are just dots” he asked.

  A chuckle fell from your lips as you shook your head,

  “Oh Tae… Let me show you” you said.

  You outstretched your hand to the sky, pointing at the Big Dipper.

  “There’s one. Imagine a parallelogram…”you were saying, when he cut you off.

  “English, Y/N”

  “Oh, come on you little baby, you know what it is! It’s like a table” you said, waiting for his nod of confirmation before outlining the constellation with your hand. “You see it? Over there?”

  “I think so. Should I try to show it?” he asked, making you nod.

  His hand outstretched before you, showing the body of the Big Dipper.

  “That’s good Taehyung, good job!” you encouraged him “Now imagine the tail of a kite following it. You see it? Like that?”

  “I see it! Wow, that’s actually really pretty” he admitted.

  Your reply came at the form of a nod, as your eyes skimmed over various other constellations you recognized.

  “These are different from the ones back home. Before you leave, I’m going to take you stargazing again. I bet you’ll love them.” You promised.

  “Is it really me you want to stargaze with?” Taehyung asked you.

  Your head turned at his words, only to find him already looking at you. His arm was rested under his head, supporting him in a more upright position as his gaze was open, inviting you in, almost like saying ‘Talk to me. I’m here to listen’. You rolled to your side, your own hand resting under your head as you tried to come up with an answer.

  “I just think you guys should talk. Openly. Like grownups. Lay it all out in the open and go from there.” He said, shrugging his shoulders a little.

  “It’s not that simple” you tried to explain.

  “It can’t be harder than that. Opening up is the hardest part. It’s like tearing your heart out of your chest and laying it in front of the other to stomp on.” He said

  “Exactly. There are so many reasons why we should just brush last night off. It’ll be easier that way” you said

  “And when was anything about you guys ever easy? I just… I don’t get it. You’ve been tip toeing around each other for years and now that you finally have your chance…” his voice trailed off.

  “Maybe we missed our timing. Or we weren’t meant to be in the first place. Everything is going to change from now on… Maybe this will be the last thing that will stay the same.” You said.

  “But that’s exactly my point. Everything will be different from now on. So why not you too?” he asked,

  You rolled back to your back, not baring to hold Taehyung’s gaze any longer. The worst thing was he had a point, and you were out of excuses. You heard him sigh next to you, but your thoughts were running too fast to understand the meaning behind his sigh.

  “You know” he said, snapping you away from your thoughts “I’ve been stuck somewhere in the middle between you too for so long. For a time, it was crystal clear to me that you both felt something more. So when Jungkook came to me… I immediately told him that he should confess. But the idiot didn’t want to ‘ruin what you have’. Love is the same. Be it romantic, platonic, parental. It takes time, work, effort and two people who are in it together. It’s not some flick of a switch, you don’t wake up one day and realize you love someone. The feeling grows and grows until there’s no more to grow and then it grows some more. What I’m trying to say is, you aren’t breaking or making anything. You are simply recognizing what was always there” he finished.

  You allowed his words to sink in for a minute, really trying to absorb them.

  “When did you get so wise?” you asked,

  “Wise? I don’t know about that. I just know you. Both of you.” He said simply.

  “It’s not like I don’t want to talk to him. Or that I don’t love him. It’s just…” you said, looking for the words.

  “Let’s say that Jen and I are out of the equation. It’s just you and him. Would you talk then?” he asked you.

  “Of course! But we’ll have to wait until we get back home for that” you said.

  “Not necessarily” he answered, already getting on his feet.

   “Where are you going?” you asked him.

   “Don’t move! Just, wait here!” he told you.

   You did as you were told, lying back to face the sky, your thoughts drifting away, your head emptying out. You didn’t know how long it had been when Jungkook’s voice snapped you away from your thoughts.

  “Hey” was all he said, yet your heart picked up its pace.

  He was leaning on the door with one hand, his other was placed in the pocket of his jeans. His hair was a small mess, making you want to run your hands through it.

  “Hi” you answered simply.

  “Let’s go.” He said, motioning with his head towards the door.

  “Go? Go where?” You asked.

  “Don’t you trust me?” he asked you, smirking.

  You scoffed, your gaze finding the sky again. Nevertheless, you sat up, getting to your feet and dusting away your clothes. Jungkook watched you without saying a word, turning for the door when he realized you were ready to go.

  You saw him pick out the car keys as he led you wordlessly out of the door. You settled in the car in comfortable silence as Jungkook picked out a playlist and began to drive.

  “Do you even know where we’re going?” you broke the silence.

  Jungkook glanced at you briefly, trying to keep his eyes on the road. That gave you the chance to study his side profile as he drove, face set, arms tightly holding at the steering wheel.

  “I thought you trusted me” he said.

  “I never said that” you told him.

  “And yet you came” he said, almost snapping back at you.

  “And yet I came” you said, more so to yourself than Jungkook.

  The car ride continued in silence, music flowing through the speakers, without you paying much attention to it. You noticed that you were driving away from the city, the scenery turning from cute houses, one next to the other to green grass and crops, stacked neatly row after row.

  “We’re here” Jungkook announced, pulling up to the side of the road.

  “This is the middle of nowhere” you said, shocked to see him get out of the car.

  “Exactly. Are you coming or not?” he asked, shutting the door behind him.

  You got out of the car in a hurry, more scared to stay alone in the side of the road than follow Jungkook. You had to trust him. You walked next to him, but he paid you no mind, crossing the street with you hot on his heels.

  On the opposite side of the road, was the sea, magnificent and angry, the wind making it crash on the rocks as if it was punishing them. It was lit pretty well by the headlights of the road, helping you see almost to the bottom of the cliff. Jungkook sat on the ground, making you mirror his movements.

  “Is this a good enough place to talk?” Jungkook asked timidly.

  Realization hit you, making you look around once more. You appreciated the view a hundred times over, making you look back at him with a smile growing on your face.

  “Sure it is” you told him.

  Jungkook sighed deeply, as if he had been holding his breath the whole time it took you to answer. The thought make you want to hug him, but you suppressed your urge. Now was not the time.

  “You want to go first or..?” you asked, fearing the silence for the first time.

  “I don’t think I’d know where to start. Tae said to just talk to you but… I don’t know how to talk to you about this” he said, his face hidden slightly as he looked down, keeping his hands busy by plucking grass out of the ground.

  You took a deep breath, trying to collect your thoughts before speaking.

  “I… I heard what you said last night. And you’re right, you know. I don’t want to look at other men like that. Taehyung told me that we’ve been tip-toeing around each other for too long and he’s right too. Ever since that night when Jimin left, I… Kook, I’m pouring my heart out here, can’t you at least look at me?” you asked.

  The weight of his gaze made you regret your words. He looked at you intensely, waiting for your next words, his eyes peering into yours. It took everything in you not to crash onto his body right then and there.

  “When Jimin left and we almost… I just can’t get that night out of my head. And I didn’t… I never thought you felt the same way after how that night played out so I-” you were saying, when he cut you off.

  “I always think about that night. But, Y/N you have to understand, I couldn’t. I could never take advantage of you like that, no matter how much I wanted you.” He said.

  “But you’d said…” you tried to tell him, only for him to snap at you.

  “I said what I said that night… To make myself believe it.” He admitted.

  Memories of the pain in your chest as you clung onto Jungkook resurface and you have to push them down. It’s no help remembering the past. Tonight, it’s about the future.

  “It’s always been you. All the girls I was with on and off, they mean absolutely nothing. They were distractions, ways to fool myself that I wasn’t hopelessly in love with you. But I am. And I don’t regret it. I only ever regret not telling you before” he said.

  At last; it had been said. Your bodies collided without you even knowing how or when, your lips finding his in a crazy and passionate kiss. You were tangled together, a mess of limps and bodies as everything faded away, leaving only the two of you.

  Jungkook was the one to pull away first, breathing heavily and connecting his forehead to yours. Your eyes remained closed, your mind trying to remember everything, from the sound of the waves under you to his hands, safely holding onto your hips and the feeling of his hair under your fingertips.

  “Do you trust me?” he asked for a second time that night.

  “You know I do” you told him.

  He pulled you both on your feet, bringing you closer to the edge of the small cliff you were standing on. You looked over the edge, the view almost taking your breath away as the sea spread out for miles on end, only to meet with the tip of the skyline.

  “Now we jump” Jungkook said.

  “Wait, what?” you screamed.

  But Jungkook only smirked at your words, counting down without a second thought. Your head was reeling, questions that would be left unanswered asking themselves one after the other. Is this safe? What if there are rocks in the bottom? We’re going to die, fuck we’re going to crash.

  You jumped, holding onto his hand for dear life as you felt yourself fall. You hit the water’s surface hard, making your muscles ache. Somewhere in the fall, you’d lost Jungkook’s hand, so you swam quickly to the surface to find him.

  He was struggling with the waves, looking for you, the wind and insufficient light not helping him in his endeavors. When he saw you come up, he swam over to you, putting his arms around you immediately.

  “That was so fun!” he said.

  “That was terrifyingly fun, yes” you agreed.

  Jungkook laughed, peppering kisses all over your face, his lips finding yours again. His lips tasted salty and you could taste the sea water on them. You were holding onto each other tightly, the sea raging around you, your feet kicking to keep you afloat, as close to each other as possible. When his hands started trailing under your soaking wet shirt, you quickly broke the kiss, not ready to get lost in it, especially under these circumstances.

  “Jungkook. We should get out” you told him.

  He nodded, leading the way over to a makeshift staircase that led you back to the top. Water was dripping everywhere, from your clothes to your hair, making shivers run up and down your spine. Jungkook entwined his fingers with yours, leading you back to the car. There, he wrapped you around in towels, snuggling next to you to share his body heat with you.

  You kissed him again, this time leisurely, taking your time, savoring the feeling. The kisses were experimental, slow enough to have you whining against him. He heard you loud and clear, deepening the kiss, his hands trailing up and down your back.

  Your moment was broken by Jungkook’s obnoxious ringtone, making you both jump. He groaned, his face falling to the crook of your neck, leaving kisses in its wake.

  “Kook. We should get that” you told him.

  “Fine.” He mumbled angrily.

  He looked around for his phone, answering it quickly and walking a few steps away from you for some privacy. You heard only bits and pieces of the conversation, so you didn’t quite understand what was being said. Slowly, you felt your eyes flutter closed, your head spinning, thoughts running. You were so happy, so unbelievably happy, you could’ve jumped off the cliff again.

  With one eye open, you saw Jungkook making his way back to you after he finished his call.

  “Let’s go back” he told you softly.

  You hummed at his words, jumping down from the front of the car and getting into the passenger seat. Jungkook settled in the driver’s seat, starting the car and driving off.

  “Who was it? On the phone?” you asked.

  “Taehyung, who else? The little snitch told Jen and she screamed that we were going to die if we jumped off the cliff… As if I didn’t research for days for the safest cliff diving spot!” he scoffed.

  “You researched for days? You planned this?” you asked, perplexed.

  “Well… I kind of thought this was my last chance so…” He said, his voice trailing off.

  “Oh Kook…” you said, entwining your fingers with his.

  “I was supposed to take you on sundown, but I fell asleep like the idiot I am” he confessed, placing small kisses on your knuckles.

  “Oh shut up” you mumbled, pulling your hand back.  

  Silence wrapped you up in the car as he kept his focus on the road and you did your best to stay awake. Jungkook parked the car not far from the house, but you stopped him before he could get out.

  “Can we… sit here for a minute?” you asked him.

  Wordlessly, he sat back, eyes never leaving yours.

  “I’m just… I’m so happy right now. But I don’t want this to be just fantasy. I need to know you’re ready to… To work on this, on us, with me. Once we get back we can’t just, I don’t know, brush each other off” you said.

  “Y/N, I haven’t been more serious about anything in my life. I’m ready to work on us however long we need to make it work. This isn’t just a hook up for me. Never was, never will be. We… We’re in this for the long run. Okay?” he said, trying to reassure you.

  His words helped your heart settle in its place, back in your chest. As you walked back to the house, hangs held tightly together, you knew that from now on everything would change. Dynamics needed to be made anew, your relationship shifting, the balance of the group’s friendship dipping.

  But you were in this together. And with Jungkook by your side… There were few things that scared you.

[lov3nerdstuff]

Voluptas Noctis Aeternae {Part 7.30}

*Severus Snape x OC*

Summary: It is the year 1983 when the ordinary life of Robin Mitchell takes a drastic turn: she is accepted into Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Despite the struggles of being a muggle-born in Slytherin, she soon discovers her passion for Potions, and even manages the impossible: gaining the favor of Severus Snape. Throughout the years, Robin finds that the not quite so ordinary Potions Professor goes from being a brooding stranger to being more than she had ever deemed possible. An ally, a mentor, a friend... and eventually, the person she loves the most. Through adventure, prophecies and the little struggles of daily life in a castle full of mysteries, Robin chooses a path for herself, an unlikely friendship blossoms into something more, and two people abandoned by the world can finally find a home.

General warnings: professor x student, blood, violence, trauma, neglectful families, bullying, cursing

Words: 4.7k

Read Part 1.1 here! All Parts can be found on the Masterlist!

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"Yet. Right." Robin repeated in a sigh, then removed her wand from her hair when the bun started hurting her head. It did little to lessen the headache that was starting to drum through her skull, but shaking her hair out of the restraint at least took some of the tension away. Little victories like that were important too.

"Actually, we do have a few answers now." Snape said after a moment, after again watching gravity at work on untangling the mess of waves cascading down Robin's back. "Morgan did come in here, and he most likely was talking about the portrait today indeed. We still have to see about the earrings, in due time. Other than that, we now have an answer to a question that goes all the way back to the start of this term."

"What do you mean?"

"The night of the welcoming feast. Morgan brought it up himself today, which quite honestly is what made me draw the connection in the first place."

"Right… You mean the entire ordeal in the hallway which McGonagall brought to an end."

"Yes. During your encounter back then, Morgan wanted to hold on to your locket as a keepsake. That line of behavior would certainly make more sense if at that point he already was in the possession of the portrait, seeing as the locket is perhaps not the most obvious, but indeed the most palpable connection between you and the woman portrayed. He hardly would have known about the locket otherwise, seeing as it isn't the most noticeable piece of jewelry."

"You're absolutely right… I should've thought of that connection way earlier!" Robin groaned in annoyance at herself, astonishment at the fact, and concern at the implications. How Snape even remembered little details like that was incredible in its own right, but the fact that Morgan might have been after the locket because of the portrait was a revelation she hadn't thought would clear the picture of the past events in her mind quite so much. Things at last started making a little more sense. "My locket and the portrait are connected somehow, that much we already could tell years ago. But it makes me uneasy to think that Morgan has something to do with it."

"Likewise. Perhaps you should take it off for the time being, until the issue is solved."

"Yeah… The bracelet too, probably, sad as that makes me. It was the first thing you gave to me that I didn't have to return by the end of the week like the books I borrowed." She smiled up at him, a sad half smile that showed defeat more than humour. "But you were the first person who ever gave me anything for my birthday at all, who ever thought of me in the first place, and that's all that matters to me. I can live without a piece of jewelry."

"I really was the first to give you a gift for your birthday? In all of eighteen years?"

"Yes. The very best gift even, when you got Jorien and Cas to make me see the day as a real celebration worth having. But I have to admit, you asking Dumbledore to take the bracelet out of this room was also-..." Robin cut herself off in the middle of her sentence, then stopped in her track and stood glued to the spot. The nagging in her mind turned into a sledgehammer that tore down the brick wall that had obscured her sight before, but now that it was gone, she could finally see. Or rather, she could wonder.

"What is it?" Snape asked as he came to stand right in front of her, both concerned and curious as ever. That really was a good way to sum up both of their sentiments currently, concerned and curious. "Robin?"

"Wait a second…" She replied on autopilot, while her mind pondered a question that she finally decided to voice when she couldn't answer it herself. "When you wanted to give me the bracelet, did you ask Dumbledore before or after removing it from this room?"

"Before, obviously, because-…" Now it was him who stopped in the middle of the sentence, when he caught on to Robin's line of thought. "Because one cannot remove from this place what was left for storage here without the current headmaster's permission."

"That's what I thought." Robin replied with a long breath, then jumped into action to look around herself in a sudden spark of adrenaline, upon which she finally picked up a random book from a pile to her right. "Let's test that theory, shall we?"

"I wouldn't do that if I were you, it-..." He didn't get any further, for Robin had crossed the remaining few steps towards the door, then opened it and tossed the book through the opening and out into the hallway beyond. She tried to, at least, for the book got caught in the air in the middle of the door frame, floating there for but a broken second, before it was catapulted right back into the room of hidden things at a speed that turned the harmless piece of literature into a lethal projectile. Robin was just lucky that Snape pulled her out of the way in an instant, otherwise the flying book would have taken quite a bit of work off Morgan's hands. They didn't have time for her timely end right now!

"You really are remarkable at putting yourself in harm's way." Snape huffed in concern-turned-annoyance when the loud clattering of the book's distant landing had subsided, and it was just then that Robin realized how desperately he was clawing onto her right now. She felt bad for repeatedly scaring him in an instant; first the thing with Morgan –which hadn't technically been her fault, but it still counted to worry him– and now this thoughtlessness on her end. Or rather the result of too much thinking, and too little care for the real world results in contrast to the intellectual gain of the endeavour. Why was she only ever truly scared of getting hurt by people, not by something she did to herself? It was one more thing to work on at some point.

"You're remarkable at keeping me out of harm's way in return. And to be fair, I didn't think it would do that out of all the things it could've done." She finally replied with a weak half smile as she looked up at him. No. Humour wouldn't do now, that much was clearly written on his face. She sighed in resignation. "I'm sorry. That was stupid of me, I should've known better. This whole day, the thing with Morgan… it has thrown me into an odd ambivalence myself. I'm absolutely terrified and at the same time all the adrenaline makes me act like I'm bloody invincible. But that's no excuse, it really was just stupid of me and I'm sorry."

"Coming that close to death doesn't pass by anyone without consequences. Neither does torture." He said after a few seconds of silence, with an expression almost as guilty as Robin's own. "It is only too reasonable that your behaviour is rather erratic, and even if I cannot say I appreciate it, I do very well understand it. If anything, I am surprised by how well you seem to cope with the situation."

"It's not the first time I've come closer to death than anyone should. Only the first time I know who the person is that wants to see me dead." She shrugged in return, but after taking one glance at the expression of prevailing concern on Snape's face, she rested her forehead against his shoulder and gave in to the urge to lean into him once more with a sigh. She knew that he didn't mind in the least… and the work that kept her on her feet might as well wait for a minute. "To be honest, it's currently less coping and more of simply repressing and pushing through. Just wait until tonight when I actually have the time to come down from the adrenaline… It'll be a nightmare."

"I will be there." He replied quietly, holding her closer against himself than his calm demeanour would suggest, then remained silent for a moment longer before speaking on. "Stay with me tonight."

"That must be a first." Robin chuckled quietly, but kept her eyes closed to enjoy at least this short moment of calm for now. "Usually I have to pretend to be asleep for you to let me stay over in your rooms."

"You are terrible at pretending, I can always tell when you do."

"Only because I want you to."

"I know…" He replied in as close to a sigh as his composure allowed. "And I know that I will not be able to close my eyes for even a minute tonight if you are not with me."

"Not without seeing all that could have been if things had ended differently. Without the shadows and ghosts and darkness. I know, all too well." She said, then smiled into the cloud of fabric around her. "And in addition to that, it's been way too long since I stayed over last, even though I always love to. Whenever it's possible. You know that."

"I do indeed."

"And I love you. Beyond what's possible."

"I know." His tone let on a hint of a smile, then he placed a fleeting kiss on the top of her head while his arms around her tightened their hold so much that Robin had to smile. He never said he loved her with words in return. He didn't need to.

"We should get back to work… It's almost time for dinner, and I want to check Morgan's office before then." She said after taking a deep breath to savour the comforting scent of him, of home. "I really have no wish to run into him again today. Especially not after just discovering that we are the underdogs in this entire issue."

"What makes you think that we are?"

"Isn't it obvious?" She asked as she pulled back at last, and fully snapped back into work mode as they left the room of hidden things behind to walk through the dark corridors of the castle again. "If Morgan had to ask for Dumbledore's permission to take the painting, then the old man must know why Morgan wanted it in the first place. He wouldn't have given him the permission if he hadn't seen through his reasons entirely."

"I agree."

"So Dumbledore knows why this is happening, he knows Morgan's reasons. He knows what Morgan is doing to me. He gave Morgan the permission to keep the painting, and he has let him proceed in what he has been doing to me for years now."

"Indeed. But we have been aware of that problem for a while now."

"Dumbledore never does anything that isn't to his own advantage. And if he lets Morgan do all that to me…" Robin sighed gravely, and looked up at Snape with the most serious expression. "I think Dumbledore wants Morgan to kill me."

"That is-..." Snape cut himself and his automatic response off in an instant, but he returned Robin's dark expression nonetheless for a moment while her words seemed to run circles in his mind. Finally, he seemed to find his own line of thought again. "While I do have to agree with your reasoning, there is still a lot speaking against the conclusion you came to. I am not saying you aren't right, but I believe there is more to it than that. You are leaving certain matters out of the equation."

"And what would that be?"

"Me, for example."

"You?" Robin frowned at him in confusion. "You'll have to elaborate on that."

"If Dumbledore wanted you dead, why would he have been in favour of the connection between you and me right from the start, and at every point since?" Snape quirked an eyebrow at Robin in return. "He is a brilliant man, I have no doubt he knew that we would end up where we are now long before we did. Thus he must have known that we would always stand two against one in the end. My involvement makes it infinitely more difficult to have you killed, which in return would make it unreasonable for him to encourage our relations. "

"You're right… That doesn't add up." Robin mused with a lingering frown. "Neither does the book he gave me, now that I think about it. Ensuring that I know more about the unforgivables than the person he wants to see killing me would be an odd way to prepare me for slaughter."

"Correct."

"What a fucking mess…" Robin groaned under her breath, then rolled her eyes to herself and at the ceiling before taking a deep breath to regain some composure. "So if Dumbledore doesn't want me dead, then why would he let Morgan proceed in trying to kill me? It's not like he couldn't put an immediate end to those efforts if he actually wanted to…"

"That we will find out. Morgan's reasons as well as Dumbledore's."

"With my luck, I probably have to die to prevent the world's impending demise or something likely unlikely… The most exaggeratedly dramatic thing we could ever think of, that will probably be my fate. Just for irony's sake."

"I will gladly see the world in ashes before I let you die."

"I know." She had to smile yet again, and couldn't resist to take his hand and give it a gentle squeeze even though they were in public. If one wanted to call a secret passageway from the seventh floor down to the fourth 'public', that is. "But whether it's the world we're saving or just me, I refuse to die before I graduate. I've put far too much effort into my essays and homework recently to let that all go to waste!"

Snape let out something that sounded like a snort and a scoff at once, and quietly shook his head to himself as they finally reached the fourth floor and crossed over into another corridor to continue their path towards Morgan's classroom. Robin was content with the reaction, and focused back on the matter at hand.

"How do we go on from here?" She asked in a whisper only, for who knew which prying ears might be nearby in a public hallway like this. "I mean… If we find it here, how do we go on?"

"We could confront the headmaster, for example. With a piece of evidence like that, not even he could deny his involvement in the issue. He might not give us the truth, but perhaps more leads to follow nonetheless."

"That sounds as close to a plan as we will probably get." Robin nodded, more to herself than to him. "In any case, McGonagall seems to know something about this entire thing as well, and I'm not convinced she's too happy about any of this either. She wanted to tell me, but the headmaster obviously asked her not to, and I at least can respect her loyalty. Too bad it is Dumbledore who is at the receiving end of it… She would make a good ally."

"Curious that you have taken a liking to Minerva after all."

"Oh, you know… If McGonagall can work with Jorien, who really isn't the easiest person to deal with from my own experience, she deserves some credit at least, if not my sincere respect."

"Funny." Snape replied with a not-smirk. "A while ago, she said much the same thing about you, for working with me."

Robin had to bite her lip quite hard to keep from snorting. They were in close proximity to the defense classroom, and loud noises like that were a no-go at this point if they wanted to successfully break and enter without drawing attention. So she settled for a soundless laugh, and a small smirk to follow it up.

"I'm glad someone recognizes the troubles of working with you at last." She whispered back softly, glancing up at Snape for but a second, which in return sufficed to take notice of the feigned glare and the not-smirk. Good… humour might do them good at this point.

"If anything, you brought the trouble into my life." He protested with a huff, while checking the corridor for anyone or anything that could observe them. Then he opened the door to the classroom with the same spell that sealed his own down in the dungeons. Robin was surprised, but very much pleased that he seemed to be doing all the breaking for now, and she only had to enter.

"I didn't bring trouble into your life!" She replied nonetheless as they walked into the room, after she'd closed the door behind them and locked it back up. It was no secret that Morgan never came to his classroom nor his office on weekends… Thus the risk of getting caught in here on this late afternoon really was minimal. "As far as I remember, you have far more trouble with people who are not me."

"That, for once, is true." He mused, but kept his eyes on the door to the office they were now approaching. "But you made me realize that I have trouble with everyone who isn't you. Before I met you, I simply thought the world was supposed to be cold and cruel like that, but then you had to saunter into my life and make me question every single thing I believed to know. You just had to show me happiness and thereby make everything that isn't you straight up unbearable, didn't you?" His sigh was dripping with so much feigned annoyance and the utmost irony that Robin couldn't help snorting at last.

"I won't apologise for bringing trouble into your life in that case." She smiled as she watched him working on the sturdy wooden door with spells she doubted were even suitable for the occasion. But she let him proceed anyway. "Seeing as the trouble only extends to people who aren't me."

"I did not say that, nor would I ever dare to." He returned a half-smirk, which made Robin roll her eyes with an even wider smile.

"Why is that?" She finally asked in an attempt not to laugh. They were breaking in somewhere… This wasn't the time for teasing and jokes, and yet they had chosen precisely this time to humour each other indeed. Oh well, why start being ordinary now, after all.

"I might have been surprised for a second, that you didn't consider breaking into my colleague's office as trouble, but then I remembered your liberal approach to breaking into places, which you displayed on multiple occasions last summer. Now, I am led to believe that perhaps you are trouble after all."

"And what if I am?" She raised her eyebrows at him with a small smirk. "Seeing as you've been causing trouble together with me all this time, I could say you're no better."

"You certainly are better at breaking into places than I am." He stated with a scowl at the still closed door, then quirked an eyebrow at Robin. "Would you be so kind to open the door now or is watching me fail too amusing for that?"

"It is quite amusing, but I'll open the door nonetheless." Robin chuckled at his feigned annoyance, then went to make quick work of Morgan's more than poor wards and locks. Thirty seconds later, the door was open, and a smug expression painted on her face as she looked up at Snape at last. "There you go. Anything else I can assist you with?"

"Do shut up, will you?" He grumbled, but Robin only had to snicker as they went to search the office. She knew that he was impressed with her knowledge of legal spells, and even more so by her knowledge of what was (in her opinion unrightfully) considered dark magic. That area didn't only extend to curses after all, and more often than not some of those unseemly spells served them better in their work than the school taught ones did. Either way, right now she knew that his entire dismissive demeanour was merely meant to humour her, and it really did serve that purpose wonderfully well.

After a good ten minutes of searching with as well as without magic, they had to realize though that the portrait wasn't here, nor was anything else that could've given them a clue about the current mysteries. Disappointed but not yet defeated, they locked the office door back up the way they had found it and made their way back out into the hallway. Unseen as ever. By now, it was about dinnertime, and thus they redirected their destination to the great hall instead of the dungeons.

"His private rooms will be a lot more difficult to search." Robin sighed as they reached the staircase that luckily was yet -or already- void of students. "He spends most of his time working from there, especially in the evenings. Or at least that's what I've heard. My information about him doesn't stretch beyond the gossip that makes rounds these days."

"We have to be certain he won't interrupt our search, or it would pose an ideal opportunity for him to justify another attempt on your life. Removing him from the castle shouldn't be a problem though, I believe I can arrange that without drawing too much attention to our goals."

"Wait, what? You can?"

"Years of knowing each other, and you still doubt me. Unbelievable."

"I wouldn't dare to."

He returned a small glare upon her sarcastic tone, but beneath the public facade of stony indifference, there was a layer of humour as almost always these days. Robin doubted that anyone but her had ever seen it though.

"In all seriousness, how soon can you get him away from the castle?" She asked after a moment, as they came to a stop in the hallway that led to the main entrance of the great hall on one end, and to the backdoor on the other. They usually went separate ways from here on, always careful not to arrive together at the wrong times and make the wrong impressions on the wrong people.

"An hour after dinner, perhaps a bit later. But in return he will be gone for a few hours at the least." He replied in certainty, and Robin wondered just how he was going to do that. Especially so quickly, after a day like this that hadn't been easy on Morgan either. She'd have to pay attention during the meal or simply ask about it later. After a few seconds, Snape added, "That should suffice to search his quarters, I believe."

Robin let out a breath in relief upon the prospect of a timely solution, then offered him a smile. "Great. I'll set up the dunderhead gang in the entrance hall to check when he leaves. That way we can be absolutely certain he's gone and not coming back. They can hold watch at least until curfew."

"I could always write them a note to have them stay out later than that, you know… At least I can for the girls. The Ravenclaws are out of my influence."

"I'm aware." She smiled at the memory of her own permission note to break curfew. Gods, that was long ago. "Perhaps we can send them up to the astronomy tower, from up there one can see the very foot of the hill. That would allow for a warning in time to make an escape. I'll ask Cas and Melissa; Jorien's got work with McGonagall, if I'm not mistaken."

Snape scoffed, then rolled his eyes in that lovely exaggerated manner. "Does Minerva ever give the girl a break?"

"Says the man who used to make me work every single night until four o'clock in the morning!" Robin laughed, then shook her head both at him and to herself. "Even on bloody school days!"

"You never seemed to mind." Snape protested with an almost sullen look, and if that was even in the realm of possibility, Robin believed he would start pouting if they'd been alone. Gods, that man was a mystery above all others.

"I didn't just not mind; I absolutely loved it even." Robin replied almost reassuringly, but with more humour than she could tone down. "But so does Jorien. She enjoys working with McGonagall, even if by far more normal hours than we do. No longer than midnight on Fridays and Saturdays and no longer than ten on school nights."

Now, Snape actually did snort for once, even out here in public. "We weren't even done with coffee at that time of night for the majority of the last years."

"We really are a terrible example though!"

"Are we, now? We usually are done working by midnight these days, aren't we?" He raised an eyebrow at her again, more teasing than serious, and Robin was sure they would miss dinner if they kept going like this. It had happened on more than one occasion.

"Well yes, we are, but for entirely different reasons!" She gave him a look, then a smile, then shook her head to herself as her cheeks tinted pink no matter how much she tried to prevent it. They really were done with work earlier than ever these days, as that left them with way more time for private matters afterwards. Not that those private matters didn't occasionally sneak into the lab or the office as well… they did get distracted quite regularly, even. But still, they tried to somehow keep school business and private matters separate now more than ever. That however did not apply for private studies, experiments or research, which they were more than happy to do in their very own kind of way, as they always had. Anyhow, Robin took a deep breath, then tried focusing on the matter at hand. "So, you get Morgan out of the castle as soon as possible, I bargain with Cas and Melissa, and you write them a note later for whoever has patrol duties tonight. Right?"

"Indeed. What reason for your request will you be telling the girls? And what are you willing to offer them in return?"

Robin scoffed, then smirked up at him in both humour and a certain smugness she didn't bother to hide. "What makes you think that they are going to do me the favour? The better question would be what they are willing to do for me if I set up a past curfew visit to the astronomy tower for them. Because they have always wanted to sit there and freeze their little butts off all night. They just don't know it yet."

"Clever." The not-smirk was back in an instant, as was the subtlest expression of pride. "As always."

"I'm trying my best." She replied with a softer smile. "As always."

"I know. I wouldn't be so confident in our plan under any different circumstances. Neither would I break into places for that matter, if it wasn't for you."

"Really?" She quirked an eyebrow at him in utmost doubt of what he was saying, and the smirk on her lips made him roll his eyes with a hidden one of his own.

"Dinner. Now. You can harass me later."

"Is that an invitation or are you trying to flirt with me?"

"Get out of my sight already."

With quiet laughter that resonated off the stones around them as a feather light echo, Robin gave him another look that said more than a million words could, then finally made her way down the remainder of the hallway and towards the main entrance with quick steps and a smile on her face. It felt good to laugh and joke again… but she had also learned her lesson today, knew perfectly well what was at stake, and that's precisely why she kept an ever careful eye on her surroundings now more than ever. They still were on a mission after all. A mission they were going to set into action now.

______________________________

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[nypmphetsbastard]

Paradis Island ch2

Genre: slowburn fanfiction, college!au

Pairings: yelena x fem!oc

Summary: college becomes a whirlpool of new people and emotions once you meet a woman by the name of yelena manages to weasel her way into your once perfect life and tear down everything you ever thought to be true. together, she introduces you to new world she likes to call 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝗮𝗱𝗶𝘀 𝗶𝘀𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗱.

Warnings: angst, smut, hurt/comfort, struggles with religion, homophobia

A/N: reminder that this story is also posted on ao3 [NYMPHETSBASTARD]

————————

PIECK'S FRIENDS couldn't be described anything short of...odd. Porco didn't talk much and when he did it was always sarcasm slipping out of his tongue and multiple eye rolls. Hange was....a character. You had recently come to find out about their wild science obsession that they swore up and down wasn't an obsession, was the main part of their personality. They rambled about random scientific theories that were proven right, wrong, unidentifiable and theories they believed to be correct. It was interesting and gave you a new perceptive on a lot of things you haven't thought about before.

Hange tackled you into a hug and rocked the two of you back and forth on the sidewalk outside of the library. Porco both tried and failed trying to get them off you and with a sigh he just gave up.

"I'm gonna miss you so much! Thank you for listening to me!" They pulled away with a gasp, "We need to hang out again soon! I have so much to tell you about!" You laughed at their excitement

"Okay okay Hange, I think she gets it." Pieck chuckled lightly, Hange dismissively waved their hand at their dark haired friend and pushed up their satchel.

"Bye! It was nice meeting you!" Hange exclaimed, waving their arm around wildly and almost smacking Porco in the face, earning them a glare from the blonde.

"See ya." Porco waved, ignoring Hange's air talking towards you that said 'call me' with a fake phone in their hand.

Laughing at Hange being yanked away by Porco for taking too long, you turned back to Pieck as she linked her arm in yours.

"You're friends are interesting." You pointed out, Pieck giggled and nodded

"Yeah they're definitely different, but I prefer a couple of weirdos than a big group of fake friends." Nodding in understanding, you began to think back to your home town.

"I wouldn't know. I've never had many friends and the one friend I did have barley paid attention to me or my life so..." you mumbled, drifting off thinking about how sad your life actually was.

"Well don't worry, you're not missing out on much." Pieck nudged you, "I had a big group of friends in high school and the one thing I learned is that popular people are only popular for their looks, definitely not personality." You two laughed together, "The group ended up being problematic for a lot of reasons and the only ones left that were still close were me and Porco. Funny thing is, Hange used to be considered a huge nerd in our school and our group made fun of them but me and Porco hung out with them and for some reason we just..,couldn't shake em off. They love us and we love them, even they do have a little screws loose in the head."

You laughed her joke but couldn't help but think about yourself. Wishing you had friends that cared about you and talked about you like Pieck did even when you weren't around.

Noticing your frown, Pieck nudged you once more, "And now you're our friend" you smiled at her and nodded. The one question that had been itching at your for hours finally felt like enough as you looked down at your moving feet.

"So...what's the deal with...Yelena?" It felt almost sinful saying her name, Pieck's attention instantly turned to you at the mention of her name.

"What do you mean?"

"Like...are you guys friends or....? How did you become close?" You asked hesitantly, the fair skinned girl looked over at you with a raised eyebrow.

"Are you asking me how to get a date with Yelena?" Pieck questioned, you stopped in your tracks and looked at her with wide eyes.

"No no no no no, I-I'm not— I don't— my religion I-" you sputtered out nervously, Pieck's eyebrows came together at your random word vomit as she crossed her arms staring at you, "I mean! I'm fine with gay people I just— I'm not" your words were cut off by Pieck's soft angelic laugh.

"Relax, kid. I don't think you're homophobic but your questions were a little...off putting" She searched for the words to say and cringed at the one she came up with, you shook you head and sighed.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to intrude."

"No it's fine. I'm not actually close with Yelena...in that way, I am in other ways but we're not really good with day to day conversations. That's Zeke's job. They've been friends since middle school I think and I guess it's stayed that way, don't know why but I guess history keeps friendship alive." She shrugged, you nodded and fished out your dorm room key out of your pocket, unlocking the door and bringing the two of you inside.

Honestly, you didn't understand why you felt such a pull towards Yelena. She was nothing short of intimidating, she wasn't short of anything actually. Her tall stature loomed over everybody in the room no matter how tall they believed they were, she was taller. Not only that, her dark colored sanpaku eyes made her already bored expressions look so blank yet so intimidating at the same time. She was an enigma to you. One you couldn't figure out.

"Shit, we don't have anything to drink." Pieck cursed, taking a look inside the mini fridge she had under her desk. Technically there wasn't enough space in the door to get an actual fridge so Pieck had just bought a mini fridge and insisted the two of you share it.

"I'll get some juice from the vending machine." You offered, Pieck let out a breath and gratefully took your offer.

"Here, buy me a cranberry juice, please?" You took the money Pieck handed you and nodded, sliding on some frog slippers and making your way own out of the dorm and towards the vending machine.

Truthfully? You had no idea where the vending machine was. A small glance towards it while walking past gave you idea enough that the machine existed, where? Well you'd have to figure that out. Trying to retrace your steps at any was hard enough given how short your memory was so you tried your best to think of the last time you crossed it. You probably looked crazy peaking over every corner you came across and looking up at the sky trying to remember but it was nearly one in the morning so you doubted anyone was just casually walking around for fun.

"Are you looking for something?" Asked a familiar voice from behind you, you whipped around and definitely did not make eye contact with whoever was in front of you. Your eyes slowly slid up till they landed on the two eyes you couldn't get out of your mind.

"Huh?" You choked out

"You're walking around like you don't know where you're going, are you looking for something?" She explained patiently, you blinked as the wheels in your head finally began turning.

"O-oh yeah, I am actually! Do you know where the vending machine is?" You asked despite your nervousness, the short haired girl looked at you with a blank face for a moment before she titled her head to the side and let her eyes fall behind you to the large vending machine that sat at the end of the open alleyway. Nearly heating up in embarrassment, you quietly thanked her and walked over to the large machine.

Your mind was so clouded with forcing yourself to not embarrass yourself while also trying to remember what drink Pieck asked you to get her that you didn't even notice the steps getting closer. Her steps got closer and closer till she walked around your crouched frame and leaned against the wall. You could barley look over at her, only catching the click of metal and the hiss of a lighter. Yelena snapped the metal lighter shut and looked over at you.

"You like cranberry juice?" She asked, pointing at the small bottle in your hand as a small smirk gracing her lips as she popped the cigarette in her mouth.

"Mmh? Oh no this isn't for me it's...it's for Pieck." You explained, Yelena simply nodded and continued taking a drag from the deadly paper wrapped nicotine. Deciding to finally make a move, you walked over to her and leaned against the wall as she'd done previously.

"Smoking is bad for you." You said bluntly, Yelena chuckled and blew the smoke out of her nose.

"I know." She stated simply.

It was a one word response, not much for a conversation but it didn't need to be. You were fine just staring at her while she stared right back, not a word being said. For once in your life, silence wasn't awkward or condescending. It was just...quiet. The kind of quiet you seeked in the middle of the night when your parents fought or when the day felt like too much, the kind of quiet you craved in the middle of an overcrowded area, the kind of quiet you longed for. You didn't mind the quiet. You didn't mind the quiet with her.

In your eyes is your humanity, the person you really are. There are times it gets lost, when you wear that facade, the facade of not caring about anyone or anything. But in that alleyway you stared into each other's souls. She said cheeky was good; she let you be yourself. You laughed so much, at times stopping because you knew a torrent of giggles would wake any scholars in nearby dorms. That's all you ever needed to connect to her in that moment, you and her, just eyes, no words. If you were mute your words and hushed giggled it would be all the same.

You bit your lip, trying to hold back to the unattractive snort that nearly made it out as Yelena chuckled at you,

"Hey, I'm serious! It was a very traumatizing experience." She joked, pushing your shoulder lightly

"And you just had to share that traumatic experience with me of all people?"

"Well, who else was I gonna tell the story of how I found a birthmark in the shape of Texas on Zeke's ass?" At that point you couldn't let it in and just begin laughing at her serious face, you looked away and leaned your head on your hand that rested on your knees as the two of you sat on the sidewalk.

"Literally anyone else! You have so many friends." You exclaimed. Yelena sighed and leaned back, holding herself up on one arm and running the other hand through her short blond hair.

"Not real friends. My 'friends' haven't laughed with me like this in...years." She revealed

"What about Zeke?" Just as the words slipped out, the blond woman's eyes widened as she side eyed you.

"Zeke? You think Zeke has any humors bone in his body?" Yelena asked incredulously, at that you truly snorted and let your head fall forward.

"Okay, okay, fair point." You agreed, lifting your head up just on time to see the woman letting her tongue slip out from her mouth and wet her pink lips, a silver shine of metal catching your eye in a quick second.

"You have a tongue piercing?" You asked curiously, besides the obvious silver septum piercing with horns pointing out the end, you never even noticed the metal piece in her mouth.

"Yeah" was all she said, dropping her hand between her man spread legs and looking at you with a head tilt.

"Can I see?" Yelena looked at you and smirked before leaning in closer

"Well you'd have to take your pants off for that." You blinked

"h-huh?" You stuttered, not expecting the answer. The blond chuckled at your nervous state and stood up in front of you, leaning down and grabbing your chin in her hand, her face getting closer to yours.

"You're an adorable little kitten, aren't you?" She whispered, you sat paralyzed as the two of you stared into each other's eyes once more, your eyes faltering down to her lips once more.

Sucking your teeth, you looked away from her sharp gaze and focused your attention on a random garbage bag a couple feet away from you .

"I have a name, you know?" You asked with a raised eyebrow, Yelena stood up at her full height and tucked her hands into her pockets looking down at you.

"Of course you do. See you around, kitten." Were her final words before she sauntered off, leaving you starstruck on the sidewalk.

You dropped your head backwards till it hit the soft plush bed you'd been craving the entire day. Falling asleep was one of the best parts of the day, there in the cozy blankets, snug and safe was where you could finally let go and let the world of dreams come to you in its dancing way. Let your mind rewind recent events and turn it into some weird ball of a mess that you would t even remember once the sun rose and your tired eyes blinked open.

Warm hands shrugged you somewhat roughly, effectively waking you up and not giving your mind enough time to catch up.

"Psst, it's time to wake up." Whispered a soft voice, you groaned and rubbed your eyes.

Once you adjusted to the natural lights beaming through the window, your mind finally processed Pieck running around your shared bedroom and dropping random clothes onto your bed hurriedly.

"What's going on?" You asked groggily

"You told me you have Professor Erwin first period, I had him last year and trust me you do not want to be late to his class, especially on the first day." She rushed out, handing you a random pair of sneakers as the wheels in your head finally began turning and you realized you had to get your ass out the door and to his classroom in 15 minutes.

"Oh fuck-" you cursed, throwing on the clothes Pieck had picked out for you and being stopped in your tracks by the short woman who shoved a croissant in your mouth and pushed you out of the dorm, not waiting to hear your mumble of gratitude from behind the piece of bread and butter.

Honestly, it hadn't processed how much Pieck for you beforehand until you made it to class and realized she'd packed your school laptop, a notebook and pencil in your bag as you made it to a random seat in Erwin's class just before he closed the door. You sent a prayer to the goddess known as Pieck Finger and immediately began immersing yourself into whatever came out of your professors mouth.

A small noise from behind you caused you to turn around and notice Hange sitting directly behind you with a wide smile. They waved excitedly at you but put their pen up to their lips as a way to tell you to be quiet. You smiled at them and turned back to focus to the lesson, making sure to write down anything that seemed slightly important. It was only after class that you felt you could finally breathe.

"Hey again!" Exclaimed a voice beside you, you looked over and smiled over at Hange.

"Hey Hange, what's up?"

"Nothing much, I woke up super early today and even got in a early jog before class."

"Pfft, cant relate. I woke up so later today by the time I even gained consciousness Pieck had already packed my bags, thrown a random outfit at me, put a croissant in my mouth and threw me out the door" you explained, Hange laughed and nodded.

"Yep, sounds like Pieck. She's just naturally like that, although I'm surprised she didn't wake you up earlier rather than just shoving you out the door." Hange observed, you shrugged.

"Oh well, at least I made it on time. I'm pretty sure Erwin was about two seconds from shoving the door in my face." The two of you laughed at the joke till you finally made it to a cross way.

"I gotta go but I'll see you later, okay?" Hange patted your shoulder and you nodded at their words, agreeing to meet up with them sometime after your classes.

Picking a random seat, you slumped down in your chair and began pulling out your laptop as the teacher started to set their things up as well. The warm hand in your cheek nearly lulled you into a slumber as the class dragged on for a while. After the 4th period, you could finally rest your head on your arms and lean against the desk as your teacher just rambled on about their life story, effectively dragging out the period even longer.

Finally, you lifted your head and rubbed the back of your neck as you made your way back to your dorm room. A mistake on your part to lay your head on a hard desk and ruin your posture even more, straining your neck in order to find a comfortable position. This tiredness didn't seem to pick up on the 'Do Not Disturb' sign at the handle of your door as you pushed your way into the room. Mistake.

The two bodies occupying the bed on the right jumped apart at the sound of the door opening but didn't turn around to face you.

"Can't you read?!" Shouted a familiar voice, your eyes adjusted to the darkness in the room and noticed Pieck laying under a mess of short blonde hair, her eyes not meeting yours until you spoke up.

"Oh shit...I- sorry" you stuttered out in a moment of shock, and only then did Pieck's brown eyes met yours. They widened significantly and pushed the blonde body off of them, revealing the same face you had been staring and blushing at the night before.

"Wait—!"

Now that was when you well and truly slammed the door shut and stepped back, not waiting to hear Pieck's response before immediately doing a 180 and started walking down the hallway. The squeak of a door behind you and the rush of steps trying to catch up to you was all you needed to hear to know that Pieck had run out after you.

She grabbed your arm and spinner you around, "Oh my god, I am so sorry! I forgot to tell you about the sign and—" she sputtered out

"Pieck it's fine! I'm not your mom, I can't stop you from having sex." your eyes lifted away from Pieck's, taking notice of Yelena who stood outside your dorm room door watching the interaction with the same blank expression she always wore. "But a warning would be very much appreciated next time." She sighed and pulled you into her arms.

"Of course, of course. I'm so sorry, it completely slipped my mind today." Pieck apologized profusely, while you wanted to be even a bit mad, you couldn't help but wrap your arms around her as well yet let your eyes fall back onto Yelena.

It was only now that you felt awful about last night, the moment you and Yelena shared made you feel like you had gone behind Pieck's back and made out with her girlfriend or something. You pulled away from the hug and adjusted the straps of your bag on your shoulders.

"Um you guys can...continue, I'm just gonna go." You said, motioning away awkwardly trying to hint at your new escape.

"No no no you don't have to, we could just find somewhere else to go, I don't wanna kick you out of your own room." Pieck insisted, regret flashing in her eyes at your words.

Subconsciously, your eyes went back to Yelena again. "No it's fine, I'm meeting up with Hange in the library anyway. You two...do what you do. I'll bring you back something to eat." You dismissed Pieck's suggestion, waving her off and turning around to make your way to the library, not turning your back once to see not only one but two eyes burning into the back of your skull.

Mistakes were all you seemed to be making today.

[jaehyunhour]

la la love | twenty-two

college!jaemin strangers to lovers social media au.

summary: in which you’re upset at jeno for still talking to his ex yeji, so you recruit jaemin to fake date you to make him jealous, but you accidentally fall in love with jaemin during the process.

pairing: jaemin x female reader (special guest appearances from nct’s jisung, chenle, renjun, jeno, and itzy’s ryujin and yeji).

previous | next || au masterlist

tag list: @neocrackheadtendencies @dammit-jjk @infatuated-with-you @donghyuckster @hyucktingz @127-jaehyun @j9emin (??) @lowkeyviv @sunsungie @choipetals @ryujinnz @air-wreckaaa @jisungpwaarkk @bby-jaem @127aliciia @marklexleaf @floweryjaemin @cheersskznct @softieissues 

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y/n stands in front of jaemin’s door, debating what she’s going to ask him. she pulls her bottom lip between her teeth, the thoughts rattling around in her head. she knows she has to apologize, to tell him how she feels, she may even have to beg for him to forgive her and take her back. just as she raises her closed fist to knock on the door, the door is flung open and jaemin stands behind, one eyebrow raised as he looks at her.

“why are you just standing there? i told you the door would be unlocked, you could’ve just walked in,” jaemin says.

“i, uh, just got here,” she responds in an attempt to save face.

“i’ve been watching you for at least like 10 minutes through the peep hole, dude, just come in,” he says, looking past her and at the sky outside. “it looks like it’s going to rain, c’mon. i can’t believe it rains in the middle of summer here,” he leaves the door open behind him and sits down on the couch. she follows him inside and sits down on the couch next to him, turning her body to look at him. he stares straight ahead at the tv, sitting tense on the couch.

“can we talk?” she asks, voice soft.

“i’m listening,” jaemin responds, jaw tense and eyes not breaking away from the show he has playing.

“jaemin, i didn’t come over here to talk to you if you’re going to be an ass,” she says sternly.

jaemin pauses the show and lets out a sigh, running his hands through his hair before turning his body to face hers. “you’re right, i’m sorry,” he says.

she thinks for a second about what to say and can only come up with: “how have you been?”

“i’ve been better. thankfully i’ve been able to keep myself busy with school so i don’t have to think about you parading around with jeno in front of my face when you know i have feelings for you.”

“i’m sorry, jaemin. you didn’t deserve any of that... but uh, i broke up with jeno right before i texted you asking if i could come over.”

“how come?”

“because he’s not who i want to be with,” she explains quietly, reaching her hand out and grabbing jaemin’s hand. he doesn’t respond immediately, but after a few seconds he softens and lets her intertwine their fingers. “i’m really sorry, jaemin… about everything. i wasn’t thinking things through when i thought about this, and i didn’t think things would go down like this. i thought jeno would get jealous and want to commit to me, but i failed to take into consideration your feelings and i really hurt you—“

“y/n—“ jaemin says in an attempt to cut her off, but she continues talking.

“no, jaemin, it was shitty of me. and i didn’t think in the process of trying to make jeno jealous that i would fall this hard for you,” her gaze rises from the floor and up to jaemin’s face, and they lock eyes. “you have cared for me and made me feel like no one has ever made me feel, and i can’t believe that it took me hurting you for me to realize how i feel about you.”

“honestly? i didn’t think i would fall this hard for you either,” jaemin starts. “i know this whole deal was just to get back at jeno, but then i started to get to know you, and it just felt like all of these puzzle pieces in my life were being put together. you ignited something in me that i didn’t even know i had. and then when we finally kissed, man, i don’t know... i just knew that i never wanted to kiss anyone else ever again. can i ask you something?”

she nods.

“did you and jeno ever… do anything?” he tenses as soon as the question is out, and he squeezes her hand.

“i never let him.” his body relaxes and she continues talking. “it didn’t feel right to let him do any of those things with me… because it felt too right when i was doing them with you. he would try and i always made excuses, i don’t know how he didn’t get fed up of me. jaemin, i really want to be with you, if you’ll have me of course, but you have to tell me about what your issue is with jeno. you jumped at the opportunity to get back at him, and tense every time he’s mentioned. what happened between you two?”

“why didn’t you ask jeno?”

“i didn’t trust that he would tell me the right version of the story.”

“i see… well, it’s kind of stupid. i’m just holding a grudge. our freshman year of college, i was talking to this girl and i really, really liked her. like i’d never felt that way about someone before, truly. well, i do now, with you, but that’s different. anyway, i thought things would go somewhere and we’d talked for a while and went out on a handful of dates, and then i went to a frat party and walked in on jeno feeling her up in the bathroom. i shouldn’t really be all that upset, she technically wasn’t my girlfriend, but jeno knew damn well that we had something going on. and then they hooked up or something, i don’t know, but we stopped talking obviously and she got with jeno for a while.”

“oh,” y/n says softly.

“honestly, like it doesn’t seem that bad but the worst fucking part is that jeno and i used to actually be friends. he was my fucking friend, and he knew how i felt about her and still did what he did... honestly, now thinking back at everything, i feel like i shouldn’t have tried to get back at jeno. it was stupid, but god, he’s just so…”

“icky?”

“yeah! icky. he’s just gross, he uses girls as he pleases and messes with them and drops them when he’s done with them. i shouldn’t have tried to get back at him, but i wanted to make him feel like shit for once in his life. he’s gone through his entire life using people and never getting the short end of the stick, and he doesn’t deserve to have it so good. did it work at least? was he upset?”

“oh yeah,” she starts, scooting closer to jaemin. she raises one of her legs to place atop jaemin’s, feeling his thigh warm under hers. she lets go of his hand and puts her arm around jaemin’s shoulders. “you drove him absolutely crazy, jaemin. he’s never had anything taken from him in his entire life and the fact that you took me and showed me off made him go mad.”

“yeah? good. he deserves it.” jaemin softens into her grasp and places a hand on her thigh. “i don’t regret doing it, though, because it brought me to you. is that too cheesy?”

“way too cheesy, but i don’t mind. i’m really sorry again that i hurt you, jaems, you honestly didn’t deserve it. and i’m sorry that it took me so long to come to my senses and tell you that i like you. i hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me.”

“you’re really done with jeno?” he questions.

she nods. “absolutely. he never deserved to have me, and i should’ve recognized that since the beginning. i should’ve listened when my friends said they didn’t trust him, when you said you don’t trust him. can we start over?”

jaemin stares into her eyes and swiftly leans in, placing a firm kiss on her lips. she smiles into the kiss and he pulls back after a moment.

“let’s just pick up where we left off, yeah?” jaemin suggests, before pushing her gently onto the couch and reattaching their lips.

she pulls back for a second and stares into jaemin’s eyes, looking for any sign of regret. “jaemin, i want you to be sure about this. i hurt you and need you to be sure that this is still what you want.”

“y/n, i have never been so sure about something in my life. like i said earlier, i never want to kiss anyone else ever again, or do anything with anyone else ever again. i forgive you, okay?”

“okay,” she responds, leaning in for another kiss. she gets comfortable on the couch, jaemin flopping on top of her and resting his head on her chest. he listens to the sound of her heart beating, zoning in on the feeling of her fingers running through his hair and begins drifting to sleep. “jaems, shouldn’t we get into bed at least?”

“mm, wanna stay here with you, forever,” he mumbles sleepily.

“if you say so,” she responds, accepting her fate and closing her eyes to sleep on the couch with jaemin in her arms, and love in her heart.