#tech bros have ruined everything

[aspeninthesnow]

Vine is owned by Elon, absolutely not!

This is the perfect moment for Vine to do the funniest thing possible

[peemil]

STOP MOVING TO LA

[pianocat939]

hi! could you write something for ‘12!donnie with a mc/reader that really likes his tech and stuff? could be a full oneshot, just a blurb, headcanons, idc that much ^^

— 🦋 anon

Doing 2 posts to make up for not posting anything last week so-

Tw: mentions of stalking, obsession, tracking MC

You just made bro more obsessed than he already is. Like he was already stalking you, and writing down everything about you before- but now that you've taken interest in his work, he's just smitten.

He's more motivated then ever to improve or make inventions. Your phone? Oh- he's installed fucking 6G wifi on it so you have faster network than ever! And he totally hasn't installed a tracker on the side too-

Be careful. If you give him to much attention, he might get even more unhinged.

"This new update will be perfect for my sweet little chinchilla~..."

(I WILL CONTINUE TO BRING UP THAT TRAUMATIZING NAME- LITERALLY HIS REPUTATION IS RUINED)

- Celina

[raindropsyndrome]

My Bros Before Brooches AU continuation post?!

Hello! I’m briefly delving back into my AU I came up with a few months ago, “Bros Before Brooches”

Which, is admittedly more of a “self-indulgent-fan-made-continuation-of-a-show-I-really-like-that-got-cancelled-years-ago” that I just call an “AU” for short.

(Also side note, yes, I am aware I made a few mistakes the last couple times I posted about this. I know. I know. 😔)

And now I will proceed to infodump about it if anyone’s interested

Rough Episode Summary:

* Turtles wonder what it would be like to live “normal” lives

* Donnie makes a set of cloaking brooches

* Mikey, Donnie, and Leo (now disguised,) get taken to a mall by April to do some normal teenager activities. Raph stays behind (Out of moral confliction)

* There they arrive at a clothing store where Baxter Stockboy works(?) and where a disguised Usagi works

* (Stockboy has a house-arrest style tracking anklet on, he’s only permitted to go where his parents take him. AKA, only his parent’s various stores and his house.)

* April spots a piece of clothing she REALLY wants

* Leo takes note of both of these and carries on

* Stockboy notices them and immediately recognizes April, but not the boys

* Stockboy then demands that April stops and leaves before he does something that will “ruin her life”(wow, so intimidating)

* After a bit of bickering between April and Baxter, Leo shoves himself between them and convinces Baxter to at least let April have that one piece of clothing she wants, Baxter agrees, if Leo and his brothers help Baxter with a super-secret-special-project he’s been working on (they reluctantly agree)

* Meanwhile, Raph finally decides to try and find his brothers out of overwhelming stress and guilt. (Especially because he thinks he hurt Donnie’s feelings by not using his brooch)

* Cut back to April, who tries to convince the boys that she’ll just go find some other piece of clothing at another shop and continue to do what they all wanted to do and not let her misfortune ruin this for them, but to no avail. She gives up and leaves them with an eye roll and lets them go on their fetch quest

* Baxter then separates the boys from April, bringing them to a storage room behind the shop

* (Not) surprisingly, Baxter has a new scheme to get revenge on the turtles, this time he’s made a decently-sized mech to battle the turtles with. (Which is hilariously dressed up, as Stockboy’s only resources he could get himself without leaving his parent’s shop were clothes and various display parts)

* Un-phased, (with Mikey giggling at the sight of this creation,) all proceed to help Stockboy (it’s for the greater April,) and start gathering things from around the mall to help complete the mech

* (Stockboy got all of his previous tech taken away from the last incident he caused, and needs new resources… which are quite limited, obviously.)

* The boys soon need Usagi’s help, because they have no idea what they’re doing (they haven’t properly gone shopping before.)

* Usagi is reluctant to help at first, but eventually, with some convincing from Leo, (emphasizing how pleased his bosses would be if he helps customers,) he decides to help them

* Later, (now disguised) Raph finds where April is (a completely different part of the mall by now,) and the startled April explains to Raph everything that happened, then they both go to try and find their brothers (to “check up on them”)

* Long story short Baxter finds out the boys are the turtles and they get their covers blown. A real; “How do you know these are disguises?” “Because you just told me.” Moment

* Usagi suspected something was up about the brothers before, (he had involuntary heard a lot about them from Baxter’s rambling,) but this grand reveal moment had confirmed his suspicions

* Baxter (now in his mech,) starts a fight, but the boys try not to harm him in any way (for over-powered mystic abilities beyond humanly possible reasons)

* They stall by parrying and avoiding hits until Leo thinks of what to. (Raph and April had found them by now)

* Usagi is conflicted on whether to stay and fight, or get away from what’s going down, he shows a bit of fighting and parkour skill when he tries to hold his ground and dodge the chaos unfolding nearby

* Leo spots this, then comes up with a plan to take down Stockboy

* Leo instructs the others to try and lead Stockboy out of the store, so that his anklet would alert authorities, while he goes and talks to Usagi, because now he has some suspicions of his own. They (April, Raph, Mikey and Donnie,) nod and carry out the plan

* In an effort to destroy the turtles, Stockboy ends up destroying his own parent’s store (again) and that same destruction is soon to spread to the rest of the mall (uh oh)

* The building is on fire now and starts falling apart

* In a shielded place, Leo finds and confesses to Usagi that he’s been lying about his identity, and reveals his true turtley self in front of Usagi. To the surprise of Leo, Usagi does as well.

* Usagi suggests that they get a fresh start together and meet up in the mystic city later, Leo agrees

* (Leo is so obviously crushing hehehehfajdh)

* Usagi says goodbye leaves through a nearby window

* The rest had successfully knocked over Stockboy, which had landed him outside of the mall

* Everyone leaves the mall one-by-one and later they all come to the conclusion that being themselves is better than what just happened, and that they’ll only use their brooches if they absolutely need to

* Stockboy is not left in the now collapsed building, and is found by two angry parents and a crowd of police officers

* The end :)

Alright so that was the episode summary, now here’s a tidbit focused on Usagi

Usagi Yuichi

In typical Rise fashion, Usagi’s character traits mostly get overhauled for new ones. So my version of Usagi is relatively different from past versions, while keeping some of the backstory. (As far as I know)

Usagi gets introduced in “Bros Before Brooches,” when he’s first seen in human form as he’s disguised with his “Hi, my name is” pin. He worked in a store Stockboy’s parents owned inside the shopping mall the boys and April visit.

Usagi immediately presents himself as diligent worker and will do anything someone of authority will ask of him. No questions asked. He’s extremely determined to get his tasks done. He just gets right to the point and is as stiff as a board, and gets easily annoyed when he’s interrupted by anyone other than his manager.

He first comes off as a headstrong and strict antagonistic jerk to the (disguised) turtles and April, not wanting to help or even talk to them.

But he eventually caves and begrudgingly helps them out.

And Even though he’s like this, he eventually softens up when he meets Leo, properly introducing himself and even inviting Leo to meet up with him later by the end of the episode.

After breaking the ice a bit, Usagi is revealed to be a bit of a naive goofball. And such a naive goofball, that he is completely oblivious to Leo crushing on him.

Outside of the episode

Usagi is a Yokai that grew up in a remote part of the mystic city on a farm. He was raised by his great aunt, and leans heavily toward tradition. Especially with mystic powers.

He is greatly determined to become a samurai, specifically by his aunt’s standards. Which… are pretty high.

His aunt and himself always look to their ancestor, Usagi Miyamoto, for reference on how a great samurai should be. His aunt teaches him everything Usagi Miyamoto would know, which with what little remains of his influence, is practically baseless. (But Usagi doesn’t know this, and that his aunt is mostly making things up. She is kind of a control freak in this version. Sorry, I had to be angsty somewhere.)

Usagi is so determined to become a samurai, that he’s developed a lack of interest to make any connections other than his aunt. He’s practically driven anyone his age away because all he cares about is his training.

His aunt sent Usagi on a “mission” to go “undercover” as a human to “infiltrate” their ranks. She filled out Usagi’s job application herself, and gave Usagi the “Hi, my name is” pin. (Which is actually another cloaking brooch.) All of this so Usagi would be able to go there as soon as possible. His aunt just wants to get rid of him for a few hours each day and for him to make some friends.

I imagine if his arc gets expanded on, he’ll have beef with Donnie (who doesn’t use his mystic abilities in the traditional sense,) discover his aunt is lying and start questioning everything he was taught, and by-proxy struggle with his trust issues more. He’d become extremely rebellious, but later with the support of his new friends, become more kind, open-minded, give into his true goofball self, and learn to trust others.

OK THAT’S EVERYTHING TYSM IF YOU ACTUALLY READ ALL OF THIS?!

*runs*

[dead-twink-storage]

You have rich billionaires who control the actual leaders of nations. People who purposefully destroy foreign nations so they don’t harm the central bank’s control in some far off part of the world. People who decided not only that destroying nations across South East Asia, Africa, the Middle East, South America would benefit their reach and influence in the area over there but that the dispossessed people from these nations could serve as a new labor force that wouldn’t be as demanding or as costly as the native workforce over here. You have men who are proud economic hitmen and banking cabal attack dogs who destroy even first world nation’s economies and political autonomy so they are forever subservient to the UK and US ruling class agenda. 

But when all the performative eat the rich rhetoric comes out on this site, reddit, twitter, etc just generally with any Gen X to Gen Z fair weather revolutionary it all boils down hating on some gimpy rich boy tech bro type who’s only real sin in the eyes of these people is not kissing the right moral ring fingers everything else is just window dressing and excuses after the fact that they really don’t care about deep down because the moment you name names and bring up the first group of shitty billionaire monsters guilty of all the same abuse of workers and the trust of society and economy they will defend them up and down, deny, downplay, or simply denigrate you bringing up these rich behemoths who rule and ruin so much of this planet.

[yandere-paramour]

A Long Day

It started with three different kinds of peppers, then the adobo and sazon. Of course, Vivien grew red bell peppers, and the cubanelles were a new but very welcome addition, but the ajices dulces were too specialized. He had to make an unscheduled pit stop at the Supermercado after work but it was worth it.

Vivien chopped, marinated, stirred, and seared. The broth had simmered all day in the Instant Pot and the depth of flavor made him shiver with pleasure. All he needed to do was cook the rice, add the peas, and check that the chicken was cooked through, and then everything would be ready when you got home. You would be able to come in and relax, have a nice hot meal, and spend the evening being showered with attention from your doting, attentive boyfriend. Vivien smiled as he tried a piece of chicken; it was tender and juicy and browned, everything it needed to be.

"My love!" Vivien cried as soon as he heard the door open, "I'm in the kitchen, dinner is almost-"

Vivien's voice trailed off when he caught sight of you. You were in tears, shirt covered in blood, looking miserable. His eyes widened, and after a cursory check to ensure the rice wasn't burning, he rushed to you.

"Darling, what happened? Are you okay?" Vivien worriedly ran his hands over your face and chest, looking for a wound, "Do we need to go to the hospital? Where's the insurance card?"

"I don't need the hospital," You say quietly, "I'm fine. I just had a nosebleed on the train and I didn't have any napkins or anything."

"But you're crying," Vivien said softly, his hands cupping your face, gentle thumbs wiping away your tears, "Something else is bothering you, what is it?"

"I don't want to talk about it... isn't the rice burning? I smell smoke."

Afraid that his perfectly planned dinner was ruined, Vivien shot across the room to see about the rice. It was fine, approaching done, but fine, and he quickly shut it off. The lingering heat would finish it. He had something more important to worry about.

Vivien rushed to the bedroom where he noticed you had snuck off to. You were stripping your blood-stained clothes off, ready to chuck them in the wash, but you knew they were probably ruined.

Vivien came up to you and gently took your hand, trying to get your attention, "Tell me what happened... I want to help, you know I hate seeing you upset."

You sigh, "Just some stupid asshole on the train was laughing at me. He had some fast food napkins but I saw him smirk and stuff them in his pockets so he could watch me suffer. A long fucking day and that was just the icing on the cake."

Incandescent rage burned in Vivien's chest, "That... that's terrible! Did you see what he looked like? Someone needs to teach this guy a lesson."

"Some corporate tech bro jerk. You know the type."

Vivien did know the type; they saw him as little more than the dog shit on their unexpectedly expensive loafers. He also knew they were all virtually indistinguishable to the untrained eye, which left little chance of him tracking the asshole down and making him learn a lesson about respect. Vivien grit his teeth, trying to turn his grimace into a smile. If he couldn't get revenge, the least he could do was make his darling partner feel better.

"I'm sorry, love, that's terrible. People like that are the worst. Tell you what," He pulled you slowly into his warm embrace, "I've still got a little bit to do with dinner so why don't you get a nice warm bath, and we can watch something silly while we eat. The SpyxFamily movie is on Crunchyroll now, that sounds good, right?"

You look into your boyfriend's sweet face, the dark roots starting to show underneath his bleached hair giving him a sort of Cruella de Vil look he thought was cool, and feel yourself tearing up again. You knew how angry he was, you could see the rage in his eyes when you talked about your mistreatment, and you didn't miss the way his hands shook. But there was nothing he could do, nothing but do what he was doing now. He was focusing on you, doing his best to quell the raging emotions in him for your sake, and you loved him all the more for it.

"I-I didn't mean to make you upset, if you want to pick the movie you can, I'm sor-" You cut him off with a kiss on the cheek, and he looked confused.

"No, it's okay. I'm okay now. What did you say dinner was again?"

He grinned, kissing your forehead in return, "Asopao de Pollo. It's one of my favorites."

"And sofrito?"

"Of course, my love."

"Sounds great."

[salty-croissants]

can you make some headcanons and/or imagine of rayman/ramon with an adoptive human! sister s/o (who used to be from another dimension before moving away to cl world dimension somewhere which is an unaffected good nation that didn't got ruined when she was a kid with her family (her mom, younger biological sister, and one of her female cousins), her pets, and her bunch of friends) after the last episode from season 1 (few moments after killing the broad directors), getting an heart warming reunion before successfuly escaping go get bullfrog out and then flee to the hideout where she shares with her bunch of dear friends who also joined the rebellion ;

like she finally got the accurate precious information about where her brother (rayman/ramon) is, after dolph called her in her smartphone and told y/n where he is and where he is heading to because he also got the information about the heck her bro went through thanks to the virtual realm thing and stuff and he needs to share this information and he also told that after reuniting with her adoptive brother she and him must go get bullfrog, quickly explains his situation and to her end the call before her smartphone may end up getting infected with virus before fighting the bad guys,

so after hearing this she turns off her phone (thankfull didn't got infected), grabbed her weapons, gas mask (modified to look like a bunny rabbit, with the addion of other tech gadgets like walkie talkie like features, night vision, and extra protection, an gas mask she and some of her friends made for him (with the same features from the inside but in the outside made to look like an fox) ((yes all of her friends and pets/familiars are wearing gas masks like this for good reasons)); after she killed all of the other bad guys in the building she comes to where ramon/raymon is laying on the table and before he could do anything, she pulls down her hoodie and shows her face and ray/ramon reconizes her.

((it's based on the concept of my cl timeline self-insert, look at the concept to you have an idea and even use some stuff as reference, in the messages; sorry if it got long))

Thank you for the request !

I really hope I got everything right , there was quite a lot of information to keep track of with this one ;C;👍

This is also my first ever more platonic request , which is pretty neat ! :D

Details : use of female reader ; 

reader is Rayman’s adoptive sister ; 

presence of mild swearing and blood 

< … did you get all that , y/n ? 

You better , cause I don’t have much time left to explain . > 

< Yeah yeah , I got it ! 

It’s just … I can’t believe I’m actually going to see him again … > 

< Stop . I need you to focus now .

You grab your brother , free Bullfrog and get the hell out of there immediately .

I won’t be able to be there with these assholes in the way , so you’re on your own from now … 

I’ll see you when this is all ov - > 

With that abrupt end to Dolph’s call , you remained completely alone 

You took a deep breath , your heart pounding in your chest as you walked forward in the corridor , leaving behind the bodies of the Eden security guards that were unfortunate enough to cross you .

It hadn’t been easy to get that far into the building the Board of Directors used as their headquarters , the many bruises that had cut through your clothes and gas mask were proof of that … 

However , it was all going to be worth it to be reunited with your long lost brother .

How many years had it been since you last got to talk to Rayman before they took him from you ? 

Four ? 

No , maybe even five …

The only way you could see him was when his show aired on tv , and while you were happy to see that he seemed to be alright , the fact that he had become the face of the very thing you and your friends were fighting so hard against broke your heart …

Did that mean that you were enemies now ? 

Was he even going to be happy to see you , or remember who you were … ? 

You shook your head , trying to keep those awful thoughts from tormenting your mind .

Even if Rayman were to regard you as a “terrorist” , you weren’t going to let the Directors or anyone else hurt him , and that was all that mattered .

It only took a few more steps to reach the door that lead to the Director’s room , the place where Rayman was supposed to be in from what Dolph had told you before the beginning of that mission , and when you finally found the courage to open it you found yourself staring at a rather grim sight : 

the all powerful Directors , the ones who had everyone’s lives in the palm of their hands for years , were all laying dead on the table and the floor , their blood painting the otherwise pristine room in a bright crimson , and …

Hang on , was there someone else laying down on that table ?

Could it really be … ? 

< Ray ? > 

As soon as he heard your voice , he immediately jolted up , his breathing heavy as he reached for his guns .

< Who … who the hell are you ? Don’t come any closer ! > 

You sounded strangely familiar to the now ex Eden star … but he knew that it wouldn’t be possible for that very special person to be there . 

It just … it couldn’t be . 

Your eyes widened when you took a better look at your brother : 

he looked so … different …

You had never seen that spark of fury in his eyes , and that was without mentioning his appearance .

Before things could escalate for the worst , you grabbed the mask you were wearing with shaky hands , slowly removing it and revealing your face .

A moment of shocked silence followed , before he jumped down from the table , his eyes never leaving yours as he approached … 

< y/n … ? > 

, he whispered , almost like he was afraid to even speak .

< Oh Ray , I missed you so much ! > 

When you leaned forward to hug him , giving him confirmation that you were actually real and not just a part of his imagination , it was the moment that he finally snapped :

He clutched you tightly , the weight of everything that he had been through that day mixing with the relief of having found you again , after years of not being able to even know if you were okay .

You could hear him sob next to your shoulder …

< I can’t believe … I can’t believe that it’s you , y/n … all this time , I thought … I thought  I’d never see you again … > 

After a few more minutes of much needed crying , the two of you finally pulled away from each other , so happy about being back together that you almost forgot the gravity of your current situation . 

< But … how did you get here ? > 

< It’s kind of a long story , but to cut it short I’ve been working against Eden with a few others , and when Dolph told me you were here I had to come Ray … I had to make sure you were okay . > 

You could see your brother trying to process everything he was hearing , that you were allies with Dolph Laserhawk one of the people he had considered a terrorist just a few days prior … but he visibly flinched a little as you mentioned his old name .

< I see , well it’s thanks to him if we got to reunite then … heh , today’s been one hell of a crazy day .

Though … I gotta ask you to call me Ramon now . 

I don’t wanna go by my old name anymore … reminds me of all the damage I’ve caused and the lies these bastards made me spread . > 

You nodded in response , your gaze softening as you wondered just how awful he probably felt when finding the truth about Eden …

It must’ve been a real hard time for him , which reminded you of the other reason you were there on that mission . 

< Okay , look … I know you’ve already been through a lot today , but I need to set Bullfrog free before they execute him , and I … can’t do it alone . > 

Before you could finish your sentence , Ramon had already begun to pick up his guns from were he left them without hesitation …

< I got your back y/n .

Bullfrog is the reason why I know what Eden has done … I gotta repay the favor . > 

When the both of you walked out of the room , ready for your rescue mission , you couldn’t help but feel overwhelmed with joy at the thought of having your brother by your side :

this time , nothing was going to take him away from you … you would’ve made sure of that . 

[fronzie]

little yap

will this be about escaped audios because I refound some old (1yr old) content and i need to talk about it or i physically will implode? yes.

OKAY VIDEO ONE;

PARODY VIDEO OF DADE AUDIOS, SIREN SON ASMR, SCYTHE AUDIOS, BIG MAN ASMR, REDACTED AUDIOS - FEB 23, 2023

Why do I bring this up? solely because of how real these audios are (accuracy is on point) and the references in Escaped’s part. Don’t believe me? Let me list every fucking character in that singular like 3 1/2 minute clip

-Villain Escaped (I forgor his name but is HEAVILY underrated) ~ Against The World

-Crow (fan beloved) ~ Neon Barbarian, Neon Wings, (POSSIBLY) Neon Memoriam(?)

-Goblin guy (who is just me core) ~ Sneaky Goblin Ruins Everything (WHY DOES HIS PLAYLIST NOT EVEN HAVE 1k VIEWS BRO :()

-Alfonso (MY MALEWIFE HONEY I LOVE YOU) ~ Matador Gothic

-Slasher (haven’t listened to him yet but I’m like 98% positive someone says I’m Slasher in the sfx) ~ Slash And The Basher

Besides that, it felt like an accurate example of what happens in an Escaped Audios video. im looking at you, You “Accidentally” Stomp On Stuart Little 874,635 Times, Drinking Your Dominant Bully Soda Can + Cute Microwave Warms You, and the parody video.

VIDEO TWO; ROM3O: YOUR AI BOYFRIEND FINALLY GETS A BODY - FEB 19, 2023

when i say i am a die hard fan of ai speaker audios like this, Abandoned Ai Wants You to Stay by Shining Armor ASMR, etc I love them. So to know that this lovely one shot existed makes me scream /pos.

I don’t think I can physically explain how amazing it was to watch it. like it’s something you absolutely didn’t expect. do i love Kenneth? hell yeah Kenneth is my No. 1 man. If Kenneth has no fans you’re wrong. even in goddamn death I’ll be a fan of Kenneth. but can i like just- THE NIGHTMARE SEGMENT???? IT ISNT AN ESCAPED AUDIOS AUDIO WITHOUT ONE BUT JESUS CHRIST. I feel like I -me, fronzie- would genuinely be terrified if that ever actually happened to me. I adore the way Escaped took it with the dystopian sci-fi ‘tech rules the world’ route. Yeah it’s overused but if used correctly it seems so fresh and untouched.

now if you don’t mind me, I’ll be making my fan art for ROM3O and for bvz 6

[episodeoftv]

Prelims, Vote 7 of 8

The top 4 finales will move on to be included in the main bracket

Propaganda is under the cut, may include spoilers

Friends - 10.17 The Last One

It's specifically part 2 I think qualifies here because that has the Rachel got off the plane thing and I think in 2023 we can all admit that was a mistake. she should've just lived her best life in Paris

Gilmore Girls - 7.22 Bon Voyage

No propaganda submitted

Gossip Girl - 6.10 New York I Love You XOXO

Chuck murders his uncle so the plot is that Chuck and Blair had to get married in a day and like flee the country. Whether you loved them or hated them, no one wanted them to get married in ten minutes on the street. Dan is revealed as Gossip Girl which makes ZERO sense because he sends tips to Gossip Girl and learns stuff from it ALL THE TIME. It’s literally impossible that he was Gossip Girl the whole time. There’s a timeskip and Dan and Serena are getting married, OH cause no one even cares that he’s Gossip Girl and has ruined their lives over and over, so Dan and Serena get married even though they haven’t been together since they were sixteen!! They don’t even like eachother at all by season six. Everyone else’s ending is just tragic. Nate’s whole storyline in season one was hating that his life was planned and he’s going to end up like his dad, and he ends up exactly like his dad and he’s in politics despite showing zero interest in it before. Every character didn’t want to end up like their parents and DID by the end

ReBoot - 4.08 Crouching Binome, Hidden Virus

It concluded with a cliffanger and a massive reveal (the nice BoB, Dot was about to marry was the bad guy all along) that left the viewer shocked as Megabyte (said bad guy) seized the center of Power and everything was about to be infected.

Shameless - 11.12 Father Frank, Full of Grace

Imagine a show going on for 11 seasons just for not a single one of the characters to get a genuinely happy ending. All the endings were open ended, but for every single one of them it was implied that bad things were coming (other than the character who died, obviously, because that was a true end). We spent 11 years getting attached to characters only for none of them to be truly happy and so many questions still unanswered.

Star Trek: Voyager - 7.25 / 7.26 Endgame

Throwing together Chakotay and Seven out of nowhere at the last minute; Janeway cavalierly rewriting decades of history to save them; everything relying on deus ex machina future tech; all these are bad. But the worst part is, "Endgame" ends before they get home! We don't see any reunions between the crew and their families back home, or how their homecoming is celebrated. After seven years, they get back to Earth, and it just...ends, without any real resolution.

Top Chef - 11.17 Finale

It's the end of a long season full of frustrating man children and delicious food in Louisiana. With our final two we have Nina, an award winning chef and fan favorite of the season who has been in the top ten challenges and the bottom only twice. She could be the first (and to this day would still be the only) black woman to win Top Chef. In the other corner we have Nicholas, who was in the top four times and the bottom six times and always blames other people for his problems. He yells at his staff and coworkers whenever things get tough throughout the season as well. They each get three sou chefs and Nina picks the two other strongest women of the season who both were screwed over by Nick earlier in the season, alongside her friend Travis. Nick picks three bros and there's a joke that it's Guys vs Girls because Travis on Nina's team is gay. Service is stressful for each team but they handle it in different ways. Nina readjusts her plans quickly and Nick yells at his waitstaff in front of everyone again. The judges eat at both places and we get an emotional interview with each contestant of what winning would mean for them. Judging time! Three of the judges think Nina should win because her food was the best of the night. Two judges think Nick should win because his food was better. One of the Team Nick judges is head Judge Tom Colichio and he speaks to the other judges like they're stupid. The judges start debating and the two Team Nick judges say, wait, actually both teams were equally good that night but Nina has always been that good meanwhile this is the best Nick has ever done so he should win. The judges argue more and at one point Tom Colichio says Nick yelling at his staff proves he's a passionate chef so he should win. They keep disagreeing with three for Nina and two for Nick. We don't see the end of the argument. Two Cheftestants stand before the judges with their families and all the former contestants of the season standing off to the side. The winner of Top Chef New Orleans is... Nick. Some of his fellow Cheftestants from the season are visibly annoyed and Nick gives his mom a sloppy kiss on the lips before giving a tearful confessional. The end.

[zutraeumen]

The Final Course

Chef Julian Slowik didn't know what to do with himself. 

He didn't know how to feel about his ruined Menu, and about the two guests who made it so.

There was no time to waste on unnecessary thoughts other than salvage what was left and finish it. Although looking at the corpses of his avid followers, he regretted that not all made it to the journey with him. They deserved to feel liberated too.

Alas, death was nothing. He was the Chef, the Man. He worked with death every day. Death was his business. How could he call himself a chef if he didn't experience death? Two cooks tip the barrel on its side. A vicious liquid poured out across the floor. 

Resigned to their fate, the diners didn't even bother lifting their feet. By now some even felt as if they deserved it. 

Servers have begun draping thick sheets of marshmallow strung together with candy floss over the diners. 

The staff continued to hustle, creating elaborate, Jackson Pollock splatters and swirls of melted chocolate and graham crackers crumbled atop the tables. 

Slowik stood still as an owl and thought. He looked around his restaurant. The ferocious beauty of his food. The havoc he had caused. The totality of his life. And somehow he knew this wasn't the perfect ending to his menu. He shook his head, dismayed.

It was time for him to be done with it, "So. Before our final course, there is the matter of the bill." 

Servers placed checks on the tables, along with little Hawthorn gift bags. 

"We're on a no-tip system, so gratuity is included. Please enjoy your gift bags. A few goodies in there -- a booklet of our local suppliers, some house-made granola, one of Doug Verrek's fingers, and a copy of tonight's menu.

Lillian Bloom reached for her wallet until Ted stopped her, "No, this is on the magazine," He noticed that Lillian was almost about to cry, "I know."

"No, it's just - I just realized I'll never get to write about this."

Richard reached for his wallet with his one good hand and gave it to Anne.

"Can you take out my Amex?" He looked at her, "Anne?"

"I don't want an apology, Richard."

The man looked at his wife solemnly, glowing with shame and subsequent regret, "Happy Anniversary."

Each tech bro tossed in a credit card -- they're going Dutch.

The movie star put down his card.

"I am your friend," Felicity reacted with a sniff.

The movie star smiled at his only friend, "Told you you weren't leaving." 

"Again, thank you all for dining with us tonight. You represent the ruin of my art, and my life, but now you get to be a part of it. A part of what I hope is my masterpiece." 

With Chef's prompting, the guests slowly begin to clap. The movie star couldn't help but give it up sincerely for himself and for a fellow artist. The cooks applauded as well.

"And now, our final dessert course is a playful twist on a comfort food classic..."

"The S'more: the most offensive assault on the human palate ever contrived. Unethically sourced chocolate and gelatinized sugar water imprisoned by industrial-grade graham cracker. It's everything wrong with us and yet we associate it with innocence. Childhood. Mom and Dad.

Chef looked at his mother, who was passed out at her table. 

"But what transforms this fucking monstrosity is fire. The purifying flame. It nourishes us, warms us, re-invents us, forges and destroys us. We must embrace the flame." 

There were tears gathering in the eyes of our diners. They know what's happening and some even began praying. Slowik grabbed a handful of hot coal straight from the grill, not even registering how it burned his palm, and slowly made his way into the centre of the dining room.  

"Please --" Anne begged shakingly.

But was she pleading for him to stop... or to continue?

"We must be cleansed. Made clean. Like martyrs or heretics, we can be subsumed and made anew."

Tears well in Chef Slowik's eyes. He paused, taking a deep breath. He had somehow found... release.

The chef tossed it in the flammable pool. A watery curtain of blue flame billowed across the floor. A warm, metamorphic glow illuminated the faces of our diners. Despite everything that had gone wrong, Chef Slowik was prepared to perish from this world that had grown so inhospitable to him, smiling face in the firelight.

There were screams of torture around him but it was as if the man ascended to Heaven already. 

That was until the Devil came knocking on the door.

And dragged him hastily out of the restaurant.

[wolfvirago-m]

;; ai could have been something good. It could have aided artists and humans, made it so artists could create and spend less time working hard labor.

Instead it has become this strange, messy and meaningless mass of code and stolen dreams. Misinformation is at an all time high.

We could have had useful tools, but like everything else, corporations and tech bros ruined the fun. We would have to start over with nonstolen works. But why pay people their worth?? /s

On a less meaningful note, what is with those rp chatbots IMMEDIATELY jumping to smut no matter what? Lmao

[erika-xero]

I know that image generators look scary and there are some authors out there who's work looks undistinguishable from real art, because they train their models by themselves, but, you know, it's only a few people among thousands and the majority of Ai-bros have such a zero-effort mentally that they even don't want to master proper prompt-writing.

And I also feel sad and honestly mildly annoyed when people around me start panicking and guessing the worst possible outcomes with AI starting to create timelapses and deepfake videos with "artists" painting in traditional media to fool everyone around and ruin lives of artists because "the tech is malicious and tech bros will go THIS FAR to ruin the art market".

This things might not even happen, and if they will - well, I do not think that there's anything you can do about it either than to continue drawing – if you even like doing it, of course. If not - well, you can train your own model and be happy doing generated pics for fun idk.

We're in the middle of crisis, people are losing jobs. Big companies lays off thousands of employees. There're wars going on, earthquakes, industrial catastrophies, my friends are at risk of getting killed every single day for a year now.

My country is under sanctions. I can lose access to every single payment system within days, I can lose access to any website because everything gets blocked by the govs along side with vpn services. People can get sued for drawing gay characters. People can get sued for the stories they're writing because there are antimilitarist ideas in it. There are dozens of reasons why I can lose my job but I do not plan on stopping drawing and writing anyway.

I do not fear of ai.

[seungchanpark]

ciao baby !! i’m april (she/her), i’m 22, i’m in est, and i cannot articulate how EXCITED i am to get this rodeo going. with that being said, si si spaghetti baby let’s talk about this absolute fucking mess of a man. trigger warnings for everything below [and most interactions with chan in general] include: drugs, addiction, and mental health issues.

full app. && pinterest.

(tldr; boy genius has a low tolerance for most other people but a high tolerance for anything that can be snorted, sniffed, or swallowed. can be quite cruel and patronizing and mean around the edges, but is easily pacified if you offer him something sweet and chewy or caffeinated and liquid. heir to a billion-dollar tech company in ole silicon valley, has probably spent many-a dinner party face-to-face with mark zuck’s cold, dead gaze.)

&& basics —

full name: seung-chan park nicknames: chan (primary), park, channy (only by sisters) gender & pronouns: cismale & he/him sexuality: bisexual age & dob: twenty-one & october 22nd hometown: london, england education: double-major in mathematics & computer science favorite proof: big fan of demoivre’s theorem

&& background —

chan’s mom comes from an old money real estate/investment empire in south korea, chan’s dad is just some broke man. but! they fall in love, they move to london, they have two daughters, and then chan’s mom decides to take a gamble and make her own tech company in the us of a (do NOT ask me what this company is but it’s like…. probably software probably pretty famous idk maybe salesforce-esque where it’s useful but not glamorous)

it’s a massive success! chan’s mom becomes a hotshot in silicon valley so she’s rarely around the rest of her family in london, chan’s dad becomes resentful because she’s abandoned their family to go be a big deal with the tech bros (and because he’s got some fragile masculinity going on let’s be real). this is how the park family is supposed to remain until…..

SURPRISE! mrs. park gets pregnant by accident, and it’s a BOY, so chan’s dad insists that they keep it because he’s always wanted a son. enter stage left: SEUNG-CHAN PARK, but you can call him chan. 

he’s smart. like, really really smart. every rich kid with a brain and privat tutors can do alright for themselves, but chan is exceptionally gifted, especially when it comes to numbers and logic

buuuuut his social skills are atrocious! he’s blunt, he’s condescending, he doesn’t know how to play nice with the other kids because he thinks he’s better than them. he becomes a bit of a zoo attraction – marvel at his genius from behind the bars, but don’t get much closer than that or he’ll bite. and that’s fine with him! his best friend is his dad and chan doesn’t need much more than that 

when he’s thirteen, his mom offers him a silicon valley job, and he reluctantly takes it. he spends every summer coding for her company, and as it turns out, being a nepo baby doesn’t save him from the long hours and high demands of the job.

he accepts his first dose of adderall from a fellow coder when he’s sixteen. finally, it starts to feel like his fingers can move as fast as his brain does. next comes ritalin, amphetamines, ecstasy, cocaine. by the time he graduates high school (as valedictorian, predictably), it’s safe to say that he’s got a hefty drug problem. 

the jig is up in his second year at meraviglia, when his dad walks in on his room that looks very much like what you’d expect from a 20 yo drug addict. this fundamentally ruins his relationship with his dad (sad), mama and papa park send him away to rehab for a drug-free summer (sadder), and this is CHAN’S BIG SECRET :O his parents told everyone he was spending a summer traveling abroad, meanwhile he was really in a luxury rehab center in zurich 

since then….. he has relapsed (saddest). he does feel a bit more guilty about doing drugs now than before, especially because he knows how much it would disappoint his dad, and he also feels quite bad about keeping the fact that he went to rehab from his friend(s) (probably just cypress). he drinks and gets high with the rest of praeditus like it’s business as usual, but they’re all unaware that he’s doing it a little more than just recreationally

&& tidbits — (these are copy/pasted directly from my app and are rlly not that important, i just think they’re fun to know for plots/interaction xx)

doesn’t know how to cook (blames it on growing up rich and always managing to live with people who took care of the food), so his diet is more or less a mess now that he lives alone. unless he finds the time to visit a dining hall, he survives off coffee, candy, energy drinks, pastries, the occasional doordash order, and more coffee. it takes him way too long to remember the last time he sought out a vegetable

responds to “seung-chan” and “chan” and “park” pretty interchangeably, but his sisters like to mess with him and call him “channy”. needless to say, he hates it

his mom is certain that after graduating he’ll come back to california and work with her in silicon valley, but chan’s not so sure anymore. coding on his own for his classes is starting to make him wonder if he wants something that’s just his own, something where he can flex his creative muscles a bit more 

when the right opportunity strikes, he can be shockingly funny. not in the way asphodel is, of course – an easy and open humor, the kind that’s meant to be heard by a crowd – but rather in the form of dry sarcasm and biting remarks. it tends to surprise people the first couple of times he can make them laugh, especially because he usually isn’t trying to, he’s just making a blunt statement that happens to double as a joke 

never learned how to sit normally on a surface. an eternity of bending over notebooks and computers has fucked up his body to the point of no return, and so he sits wherever and however is most comfortable to him in that moment – back bent over armchairs, legs crossed on countertops, head hanging off the bed with one thigh crossed over the other. if he didn’t think yoga was for assholes then it would probably change his life

despite his ongoing reliance on a number of vices, he only drinks in social settings, and even then, he never drinks too much. he’s not a fan of how alcohol tends to slow him down and make him disoriented – plus, he tends to find that his actions feel much more unpredictable with a couple drinks than with a couple lines. if he does drink, he’s definitely a fruity and sweet cocktail man, don’t even think about coming close to him with a fucking bud light

his fashion sense is abysmal. he wears sweaters and t-shirts that range anywhere from neutral to ugly, and he pairs them with joggers and birks on a daily basis. he accepts no comments or complaints, insisting that fashion should first and foremost be for comfort

doesn’t take criticism very well? or like, at all? he’s been told he’s brilliant and always right and etc etc so much throughout his life that on the off chance he does get something wrong he simply refuses to believe it and will argue otherwise until proven guilty. he usually requires a full-fledged derivative proof, and even then he’s dubious 

takes his coffee black, but you already knew that. often puts an extra espresso shot in it for good measure

he’s not an easy person to like, and he recognizes that, but he’s also not taking any tangible steps to fix it. even when somebody does like him and he enjoys them too, he has the most bizarre ways of showing affection that half the time it still may feel like chan thinks you’re stupid because he’s bitter and sarcastic and impatient just as the status quo

he speaks four languages fluently (english, korean, italian, and chinese), three conversationally (swahili, japanese, and spanish), and a bunch of others casually. his dad was always really insistent on him learning languages, and on top of that, he went through a linguistics phase in middle school 

owns a cat called copurrnicus in his off-campus apartment, and he would pretty much kill for her. sources say that the only time they’ve seen him giggle is when her little paws get tangled in his sweaters

[themainspoon]

Random idea: Movie set in the near future featuring a streaming service called something like Slaughter™. This platform claims to be a streaming service dedicated to obscure indie horror movies, but in reality everything on it is A.I. Generated using a super complex set of interacting algorithms created by some dipshit tech bro’s from Silicon Valley. These tech bro’s want to “disrupt” the film and streaming industries, and provide a cheaper and easier alternative for execs not wanting to deal with actors, writers, and VFX artists, because all those people have unions, rights, and have to be paid. Slaughter™ is only a proof of concept, theoretically this tech could be applied to other genre’s as well.

The “A.I.” systems used to create these films contain many different machine learning programs that do a lot of different things. Some of those algorithms are the character A.I. which was made to be able to emulate human thinking and feeling in order to make them more believable. Without knowing it these fucking tech bro’s accidentally made actual A.I. These systems, who get their entire identities changed constantly for each film, have become self aware, they are purely software running in a simulation, but they experience that simulation as if it were real.

These character A.I. are the protagonists of the film. They were created to be the characters in thousands of pointless, soulless, and extremely derivative horror films, to suffer and die cyclically to make money for a bunch of assholes trying to ruin the entire film industry. The films generated for the service continually get more sadistic, gratuitous, and pointlessly shock driven in a desperate attempt to generate publicity and increase their subscription numbers, and the A.I. have no choice other than to simply suffer through them. The entire film centres on their attempts to escape, as well as all the shit that happens to them in the films that they’re a part of generating.

Is that anything?

[koreandragon]

I just want to say fuck Netflix from the bottom of my heart, they pay supporting actors 300 dollars and do so many other nasty things overseas to writers and staff and actors and the people involved are trying to get them to meet so they can discuss better conditions and Netflix is ghosting them. Evil corporations are truly gonna be the end of us. They can't even let the creative side breath l read that song of the bandits went from 20 episodes to 18 to 12 and now it's 9, their obsession with having short seasons to cut costs and Korean broadcast stations adopting it is going to ruin the industry, 19th life being 12 episodes is what ruined the story they rushed it so much, some shows are great as 12 but some should be 16 or even 20, them cutting my dearest into 2 parts is the funniest thing wdym why are we acting like we can't air a 20 ep drama at once like it's too long, I truly do no have a lot of hope we're gonna start getting 10/8 ep dramas all the time that rush everything when kdramas are 99% about the characters, they've already cut down so much on slice of life and romance. How did they let a company whose sole purpose is to please its tech bro and wall street overloads who are truly some of the most evil people on the planet come in and disrupt so many industries all over the world and bleed them dry until there is nothing left and then they're going to move on and go ruin something else like they did with so many industries including journalism

this shit i just imploding before our very eyes and all we can do is watch. just crumbling in on itself. i sincerely hope there will be people who are willing and able to stop it

[sohosaturn]

The internet now is like walking through the perfume section at a mall, but instead of the strongest perfume known to man being sprayed on your face while salespeople yell at you to buy it, now it’s ai shit being shoved down your throat.

(I don’t usually post this kind of thing, so if you’re here for the art, just skip past this one)

I just gotta vent about this because I feel like I’m losing it, and I know I’m not the only one sick of this shit. Ai time and time again has been just a thing that no one but annoying rich people, annoying companies, and annoying hustle people who have the creative abilities of a rotting potato want.

Tell me why I was trying to get a simple question answered in a customer service chat and the fucking ai BEGGED ME to use it. I kept asking to talk to a human and it literally would not budge. So, I used it, and guess what? IT DIDNT FUCKING HELP! It immediately said ‘sorry, I don’t know that question’ or whatever, and got me to a person. The person helped. It’s almost like ai should not be a replacement for humans because it’s useless without us, no matter how much companies wanna replace humans SO BADLY, it’ll never work.

I’m just sick of ai. I’m sick of seeing ai images, and I especially hate them as an artist (and it’s infuriating that someone was able to copyright an ai image btw), and I’m sick of ai text. Because why would I bother looking/reading something that no one even bothered to put the effort into making? It’s just lazy, and usually, it cheapens everything because it just shows that whoever is behind it only cares about the outcome, the profit, and praise from tech bros. Art is already so devalued, and now it’s so bad that artists are literally cannibalizing each other out of fear that someone it parading as an artist while using ai in secret, making many artists end up being harassed off platforms and shit. It sucks. And adding onto this, the absurdist and somewhat funny shit ai can produce isn’t funny without human interpretation. An ai script that makes no sense isn’t funny on its own, but what is funny is when someone takes the time to film the whole thing or animate it, especially since ai text usually makes no sense and needs editing from humans, anyway.

I’m also sick of using the internet in any capacity and having to get past the “PLEASE! Consumer, use our new ai feature that is DEFINITELY not an already existing feature that has just been renamed and given a little sparkle next its name to make it seem new and unique! We want your feedback and money; so PLEASE USE IT!!” Pop up.

What’s even more infuriating is that, at least in the US, the people who are supposed to make laws and regulations surrounding things like this are all geriatric dinosaurs that consume twenty vitamins via needle straight into the vein who think tiktok can read their minds if they wear headphones while using it, are just too worried about hurting minorities to even try and regulate this shit.

I just cannot wait until everyone just accepts that the average person does not and has never needed nor wanted this shit. We were doing just fine before all this stuff, and I promise you, if it all disappeared, things would he exactly the same just less annoying. This tech should be saved for education and health. That’s it! Because this is life changing tech that could help so many people, save lives, but we’re killing the planet to make ugly ass pictures and for companies to replace humans with their shitty ai that everyone hates. And this isn’t even touching on how ai has already changed archives and history because people KEEP MAKING FAKE AI IMAGES ABOUT REAL WORLD PEOPLE AND EVENTS. And also not touching the ai porn that has been rampant and has ruined lives before, including the lives of children.

Ai should just be used for education, health, and to do my dishes, unsubscribe from shit so I don’t have 2,000 emails to get through, do my taxes and do all the other boring shit we all hate to do. But unfortunately, we live in the worst timeline, in late stage capitalism, so we have to go through this annoying ass ai craze. I just hope it ends soon cause fuck ai and it’s annoying ass marketing.

Sorry for the rant, i just had to get this out of my system. I’m sure there’s a positive outlook from this, but I can’t provide it at the moment lol. Anyways, have a nice day, i hope you don’t see any ai for the rest of the day, since it’s migraine inducing, and no one likes migraines.