#tbh i havent been that happy with what i make nowadays?

[noornight]

Saw this and immediately thought of them.

[lorenfinch]

Happy WBW! 💜💌 What does the ideal (or stereotypical, or both if they're different) marriage/partnership look like in any of the cultures present in the world of your WIP? Is it about a powerful union of equals? Is it about chemistry and happiness? Is the end goal to produce kids? How does gender impact this, if at all? etc.! :) - @liv-is

Happy (late) Worldbuilding Wednesday @liv-is!

TBH I havent thought about this one much! Blood family is placed in high importance in the Luminous Faith, so it'd make sense for people following that to place value on producing kids. This is especially seen in noble families, to keep the bloodlines going strong. The Luminous Faith is purposefully inspired by some aspects of Christianity, but polytheistic instead of monotheistic, so they'd share some similarities. Gender roles are reinforced rigidly in places like Fabros, while places like Cedra may be more lax in comparison. Lower class people also tend to be more lax in regards to this.

I have a vague idea of what Levanois (where Vince is originally from) would've been like. Polyamory is a lot more accepted, and nowadays more same-sex marriages are found across classes (in Vince's time living there, this was not the case, but that was around 700 years ago and times have changed). I'm thinking it's ruled by a single marquis/marchioness with multiple consorts.

Elves see marriage as a human construct, and don't really have a concept of it, instead taking one or more life partners. No religious significance behind it. Though, if an elf had a human partner, I imagine some would be open to it.

[this-was-a-terrible-idea]

Tag game!!

Tagged by @bi-bats thank u for the tag ily 💕💕💕

name: Bean!!

pronouns: she/her (i dont mind they/them though)

where do you call home: Alaska!

favorite animal: frogs n toads 🐸💚

cereal of choice: really depends on my mood and what my available options are, tbh. recently its been cocoa puffs with chocolate milk 😂

visual, auditory, or kinesthetic learner: visual and kinesthetic!! if you try and give me auditory instructions i will bluescreen

first pet: when i was a kid my parents had a german shepherd and two black cats! they all died when i was a kid though, and i havent had a pet since 😔 i want a cat so bad

favorite scent: the woods!! the forest!! trees and dirt and leaves and petrichor and loam and moss and earth. looooove that scent.

do you believe in astrology: not really. growing up i used to read my horoscope with my mom for fun but nowadays i dont put a bunch of stock into it. its fun though, even if i dont know what it all means (my sibling made me calculate my big three and its virgo pisces pisces, in that order. no idea what that means for me tbh but it cracks him up)

how many playlists on spotify/apple music: HEY. listen i already get so much shit from my sibling for this so i dont wanna hear it askjldfhhkasjhdf i dont really use apple music for playlists but spotify... i just clicked create new playlist and it auto-titled it "My Playlist #166" so. 165 of my own playlists. dont ask me how many are basically the same playlist with slight tonal shifts. i dont wanna hear it akfasdlfdfa;dl (and no i WONT go through and delete playlists. spotify is an archive to me lmao)

sharpies or highlighters: sharpies. highlighters have Specific Uses in my brain and sharpies are multi-use and fun

songs that make you cry: im not sure ive cried over a song since i was a teenager that would process my emotions via laying on the floor with my earbuds in, ipod volume set to the max, crying. one of THOSE songs is End of the Line by Henry Jackman. Some songs that make me sad nowadays though are Something in the Orange by Zach Bryan (i KNOW, its country!! how much i like this song surprised me too) and If We Were Vampires by Noah Kahan and Wesley Schultz.

songs that make you happy: not to sound like a snot but i feel sooooo many complex emotions over music and broadening them to reach an overarching 'happy' is askldfjadf im overthinking this one i believe. anyways. Northern Attitude by Noah Kahan, When the Day Met the Night by Panic! at the Disco, Cafe Carnival by Craig Chaquico

do you write/draw/create: sometimes!! id say like 90% of my writing never gets out of the discord rambling stage (sometimes i post that on ao3 if i like it and feel like its long enough) and i wouldnt classify myself as an artist, but for creating i recently got into bookbinding!! ive been typesetting things and when i get to go home this next hitch i want to actually get the woodworking bits i gotta do done so i can move onto the actual binding parts.

no pressure tagging: @skyderman, @cacopheny, @megatraven, and anyone else who might want to do this! again, no pressure :)

[deutoplasmic]

LMAOO yes i am in the asia pacific region hello neighbor 🫡 and i got a good amount of sleep!! because i woke up at noon lol

PLSSSS long haired fengfan in 汉服,,, idk abt you but i wouldve thought ive already died and gotten to heaven if hes what i wake up to

MASAYA CREPE SALESMAN SOUNDS SO FUN and it would definitely calm fengfan down from the competition LMAOOO

IT WAS THAT SHITTY MATT DAMON MOVIE WHERE HE ACTS LIKE THE WHITE SAVIOR OF CHINA 😭 its called the great wall and i watch it for 鹿晗 but it was frankly one of the worst movies ive ever watched and like. 鹿晗 is a great singer but his acting is,,,

I LAMENT THE LOSS OF UNIQ TOO 😭 but im especially happy for sungjoo he does tiktok lives now and sometimes you can see all baby stuff in the back for his son its cute

for music i love a bunch of stuff!! mostly kpop/jpop/some cpop lmao if you want some recs i can put them in a separate ask!! what kind of songs do you like ^^

LMAO WE’LL SEE i havent watched any dramas in awhile but wei daxun’s a pretty famous actor so i hope hes got a nice filmography to peruse

THANK YOUUU we’re planning to make more than a hundred this year which is more than usual so HDNDJDJ

also. well fengfan is a given. but i also like rihi and nishi! and sometimes the flat earther line (masaya and takeru) get me too 😭 im also a jam and with jo1 my bias line is. basically the entire group but mainly takumi

sleep is sleep even if it's at noon LOL we will take it

you are so real for that. now i need fengfan to wear 汉服 bc for 春节 ALL HE DID WAS POST A NORMAL PHOTO WITH 新年快乐 OR SMTH!!!!!!!!!!!! it's ok i'll take him wearing like a yukata like during the ini folder summer festival eps or smth damn it 😔

he probably does the fancy crepe brulee thing too oh my days i'm salivating. masaya you better start up your crepe store soon!!!!!!

WHITE SAVIOUR OF CHINA IS CRAZY. and not the great wall omfg 🤣 are you a lu han fan??? and uh. yeah. i hear it leaves smth to be desired lmfao 😰

wait really omg i'm glad it's going well for him!!!!! tbh i haven't been up to date with like . most of the uniq members like what is yixuan doing nowadays

WAIT NO WAY i would love some recs. love music so very much omg.... i like kpop, jpop, rock, metal, prog, and classical!!! but i listen to just about anything!!!!!

i hear he's got quite the catalogue of dramas he's starred in LOL hopefully your search is fruitful 🙏

MORE THAN A HUNDRED WOOOOOOOW i'm sure you guys can eat them all. determination. also what quantifies as usual omg ...... 😰

no way!!!! the rappers of ini!!!!!! also omfg flat earther line being masaya and takeru what'd they even do to earn that name LOOOOOL 🤣 takumi is such a guy i do not blame you.... i loved his role in cool doji danshi so much it was a bit too relatable........

[bbarican]

august 28, 2022; 7:10 pm - long weekend

long post ahead! i feel like i havent really had the time again to just sit down and update my tumblr (and even myself tbh) with everything thats going on with my life so fair warning this post is going to be super long but feel free to read along

work:

i hate how work is all i ever think about nowadays kasi wala naman akong jowa, all my friends are busy too, tapos na yung board exam pumasa na ko and everything so talagang when i have problems at work, its all my brain can think about and its really exhausting

ill try to go in depth again about work in another post next time pero all i can say is its both really fun to be challenged but also its just really tiring too kasi it isnt the most ideal way of being challenged (if that makes any sense)

im just really thankful for my work friends kasi they constantly remind me na oo nga pala im not alone and they understand me more than anyone could kasi theyre living through these challenges too

family:

my tita and tito are leaving this week and its really bittersweet! i love having them here kasi nga its a great break from the mundane but its also very tiring to constantly have to be a host every single day so all in all im just really glad they got to visit and that they had fun here during their stay!

sana most of my cousins could come to our house tomorrow for my little celebration kasi i really do miss them plus ang daming pagkain na balak lutuin/bilhin ng nanay ko and i dont want that to go to waste

i miss my kuya so much and i wish march would come sooner para nandito na siya for a few months of vacation

i love my family and our dogs so much and im forever thankful for all the blessings we receive everyday and that we're always safe

personal:

where the fuck did this rain come from? it was partially sunny from yesterday to this morning and now its pouring again - i love the rain, not so much the lightning, but i really hope it doesnt rain tomorrow

im so excited for tomorrow kasi my brain is already making a mental to do list of the things i want to accomplish tomorrow before guests start arriving

im so emotional and extra bloated kasi magkakaroon na ulit ako ng period and most of the time naaamaze parin ako sa flor app kasi sobrang accurate niya when it comes to telling you how long before you get your period again (that is, if you make sure to always update the calendar once you do get your period)

i dont exactly know what to wear yet tomorrow - and yes inisiip ko parin yun kahit na sa bahay lang naman kami magcecelebrate

i got the tiny spray bottle that came with my keyboard cleaner to work! akala ko sira talaga siya ever since i got it pero i think i just havent been pushing it correctly all this time lang

i kinda want a cute mousepad too kasi ang panget ng mousepad na gamit ko whenever i use my laptop

music:

talk that talk is SOOOOOOOOOOOOO much better than pink venom when it comes to comeback singles

im so so so happy about twice sounding more like they did around mid 2019-2020 kasi thats my favorite era from them and im just really happy na talk that talk fits that sound ive always been looking for from them

super love the y2k mv, the choreo is AMAZING, the song is really cute, and i really love how maganda yung distribution of lines nila in the song

theres this particular song i recently fell in love with and instead of gatekeeping it (even though im sure some of you might already know it) im going to share it with all of you kasi its one of the loveliest songs ive discovered in a really long time - golden hour by jvke; reminds me so much of call me by your name and feeling like youre in italy and falling in love and being outside, basking in the sunlight with your lover - i really hope someone, someday, remembers me when they hear this song

and thats it for another update post! again if youve made it this far, thank you again for reading my updates; i hope you all are doing okay and are staying safe and dry!

happy long weekend, tumblr! sulitin na natin to!

[dreamyoongi]

OH i see, so it's about like the quality of the production. i think your points are fair even tho tbh i didnt notice any of it for this video, i really enjoyed like the concepts and colorful stuff and ""retro"" typography signs and shit. but one of the things i hated about idol was the mv, like it was just too much going on in one single video and nothing felt connected, it was just so chaotic to me and some of it really looked cheap - A pt1

and the thing about the b sides. like i know its a tradition for bts to have the rest of the album be better than the tittle tracks lol but for the past few albums that didnt really happen much for me like i would hate the tittle track and half the album so i only had the other half to actually enjoy. even if this title track is the typical catchy mainstream wtv song, at least this time i dont absolutely hate it and thats such a weight lifted off my shoulders haha - A pt2

ive been folloiwng u for a good time i think and its so refreshing for me to see other ppl that arent very happy with current bts' choices. i actually felt mostly alone besides my best friend also feeling similar to me. thank you for sharing your opinions on this blog :) - A pt3

oh yeah i also agree about their styling omg! 90% of wtv gucci stuff they wear is fugly as hell and sometimes they put stuff on them that really doesnt fit and makes them look ridiculous, altho personally i strongly believe they have been doing that with yoongi in particular since the beggining. the number of hideous outfits he has had is outstanding and like why??? just tailor shit to fit him properly??? he can look amazing if they do their job right!! - A

i liked the building they shot the mv in front of too and the initial pastel tones were also super nice. but now after coming back from my vacation its literally the only thing i remember.... i had to go back and re watch to remember that they did several singing in the rain references. 

and namjoon said in a vlive a few months ago that nowadays title tracks are the most important thing on an album and rarely do people listen to the b-sides. and that is the moment where i REALLY started to doubt if i would ever like bts’ music as much as i did before. bc if most of their hand work goes into these title tracks... rip... 

and dont even get me started on the STYLING its a fucking embarrassment  at this point. their direction at this point is only ‘follow the TREND and the pricier the better. off the rack, we dont need to adjust to our widely different clients’ 

honestly being away for almost two weeks now i have barely checked into what is going on. and i havent listened to even one of their new songs if im being honest. at this point im not feeling it anymore and i really have almost fully left the fandom i think.

[redandfranticfeelings]

south park, bc duh

send me a tv series and I’ll tell you:

my all-time ultimate fave character: it used to be kenny but tbh i LOOOVE BUTTERS so much. hes just so funny and pure and sad and a great standout for the show.

a character I didn’t used to like but now do: kyle has rlly grown on me tbh. a lot of  them have! even fucking terrence and philip have.

a character I used to like but now don’t: most characters i started out not caring abt and now i like them more so this is hard to say.

a character I’m indifferent about: stan. also clyde, idk why hes so popular

a character who deserved better: heidi

a ship I’ve never been able to get into: a lot of bg character crack ships like craig/kenny or token/clyde

a ship I’ve never been able to get over: hhhh....bunny.......good

a cute, low-key ship: style and creek

an unpopular ship but I still enjoyed it: im surprised kenny/damien isnt more of a thing? i havent seen damiens episode yet actually but the concept of kenny going to hell and hanging w damien and satan is funny to me

a ship that was totally wrong and never should have happened: heidi/cartman bc duh, but the way they portrayed the ship going south in season 21 from what ive seen is perfectly heartbreaking. i just wish they didnt try to sell it as cute to begin with. in terms of fandom..........kyle/cartman bc thats just sick, dudes

my favourite storyline/moment: the scene when craig actually helps tweek with his anxiety in ‘put it down’ makes me so goddamn happy. its almost unusually compassionate for a show like this.

a storyline that never should have been written: janet garrison as a concept was terrible and the show has to work damn hard to undo their transphobia there. i havent seen the episodes specifically about her i admit but the way they portrayed transitioning and sex change surgery is stupid. i know it was 2005 but jesus.

my first thoughts on the show: wow this could be really good if cartman werent here

my thoughts now: wow this could be really good if it were written by people who really thought about the impact their work has on american culture and knew how to actually be revolutionary nowadays instead of just mostly echo popular beliefs

[unproduciblesmackdown]

this one for the special club of ppl who have no friends

idk abt yall but even for myself im not sure exactly how long it took me to work out that i was & had been more isolated than the avg person over my life & realizing that the feeling i had since ever being around a group of ppl (preschool) that i couldnt fit in or have more than like, one friend that was mostly defined as “wanted to actually play together at recess or smthing”, was just actually generally true. idk what it is but you know what its like when ppl have some tendency to ignore you. or quietly gain contempt for you because they think you’re weird, which i havent known to stop being true between like 10 yr olds & ppl in their 20s. when ur being talked over even in a group you’re supposed to be in and its like listen. what is going on that this happens so much

anyways when you have no friends its always wild when anyone does show up and actually act like a friend more than like once & show the slightest interest in you as a person. for me though i did have to learn to just not care as much when this happens because its like the sheer math of it all yknow. a person who is used to having like, a more avg number of friends across life is gonna make a friend and be like “oh man awesome” but on the other end of things when u have only a handful of friends and/or little access to friends &/or no close friends, getting a new friend seems way more significant because its like wow this is only 1/18 in my whole life or something. whereas for the other person you are 1/143 idek. not to say that each friend is less important to someone who has more of them. but it is less of a big deal to gain a new one, and a new person theyve just been talking to a bit IS going to be a less important friend

where this is going is just that, never having friends = everyone else being a big deal to you, but you arent a big deal 2 them....a lot of wondering why you always like ppl more than they like you. in my experience its not fun so, with the motivation to stop feeling terrible over that repeated revelation, and also figuring out that its because being so isolated / having few to no Reeeaalll Friends = valuing new friends way more than they value you, rather than just that everyone definitely hates you....i personally have tried to stop caring less about getting the opportunity to talk to new people.

thats not to say i dont enjoy it or value it or like the people i talk to.....i do enjoy it, im a social person in my own way, and i appreciate it when it happens b/c i dont consistently have conversations with anyone. i just don’t get excited abt a potential friendship or expect to ever reach what feels like a real & solid friendship w anyone. i have picked up a few ppl in the past like 5 yrs i do consider friends but its always taken a while to get there.

its kind of funny because like i said i AM kind of social & i do really care about people i get to grow a bit close to.......there is definitely plenty of ppl i dislike right away & have the opposite interest as being friends with them....but when i do like ppl, idk, i like to try to support them and be nice to them and be there for them in the usually tiny ways i can.....i love to talk to people actually. in person when im actually comfortable, i can actually come off a bit overly talkative....i can be energetic when i’m happy & i do have a lot to say about things sometimes but usually only in my head. even typing it out is difficult b/c i can only type so fast, especially with a phone. but in other situations i can have trouble actually getting my voice to come out at all, or i choose not to speak at all b/c i dont want to. or when im frustrated i dont want to talk for a moment but thats generally because there is no one around i want to talk to about it. i can talk abt something for hrs....and it is of course extra special to me b/c i dont get to be around ppl i like talking to them that often

idk and i like to do nice things for friends when i can......i dunno. i do like people. i can be pretty choosy about who i hang on to, i might only have a select group of friends even if i wasnt isolated; but still....theres a lot of people in the world. even being picky about it, you could have a huge friend group

little tangent i dont trust trying to make friends in groups at all really lol.....like even if you’re friends with someone who’s in a bigger friend group. i might cautiously give ppl a chance just b/c of the good endorsement but ive also had bad times w it. and often like, even ppl i all individually like, to be in a group w everyone is to realize that my way of socializing means im a lot of times off on the tangents and it just makes it clear that there’s a whole Thing going on in the middle that you’re not at all involved in. and then there’s ongoing Things that nobody lets you in on and its like alright i guess i’ll do my own thing that nobody’s interested in. idk and its happened that i’ll be in a group and again just like....not be even noticed physically and its like. feels great man

anyways i guess theres general things about Friendship that i feel i miss out on, on account of never experiencing it

like ive never felt like i had someone i’d tell anything to, not even collectively, like i have three Things to tell & maybe i cant tell anyone all three but i know three ppl i’d tell one of each to

ive also never quite felt like i’d always have someone to talk to just in general......or been in the situation where if i wanted to go out and do something w someone i knew i could find someone to go w me.....idk theres never been the feeling that i always had access to friends in any way. or like, ever had access to friends, most of the time at least

i also have no idea....when ppl talk about having longtime friends like known all their life im like wtf. ok. weirdo. ive had a friend for ten seconds

kind of a bummer b/c i think a lot of ppl consider College to be th easiest place to make friends...like before that you mostly have school friends and afterwards its like oh work friends but college you have a bit more mobility and different situations to meet people.....but post-college its supposedly just increasingly difficult to make new friends. and being more isolated makes it even more difficult as ppl tend to ostracize ppl for being lonely weirdos

im always lucky i get to talk on here tbh......it occurs to me it’s probably bad to feel completely unheard. because it frustrates me a lot at times to feel that way. even nowadays i dont really say anything about the stuff i think & dont ever find myself wanting to....im picky about who i really feel like having long or even short but actually genuine convos w like i said...............and idk its not that infrequent too for ppl to seem to not really care one way or the other or listen or even like it when i talk. i only wanna talk in situations i feel good talking obv lol....otherwise i’d rather stay quiet, but staying quiet is frustrating also. but i do it. but i can say things here at least even if i’m not actually talking aloud

i cant expect to ever have this mythical friend group or whatever.....i dont have Expectations like that. and in the meantime ive been lowkey for a few years just trying to lower my expectations even for ppl im just chill-ly talking to. its not that difficult nowadays, i get a bit pumped to just be talking, but i dont get Pumped Abt New Friends or anything. i know it doesnt work like that....and its not like i was ever like, wanting a blood oath after two conversations or anything like that. it just tends to mean more to you and then you find out you dont mean as much to anybody else really

oh but a good silver lining is that now i have better standards for ppl anyway, to be like “well it sucks that it turns out my connection w all these ppl wasnt that solid at all, but hang on now that i think of it do i even Like this or that person”

life is wild huh. back in preschool i thought something was wrong w me that nobody liked me & nowadays i dont care if they do or not. im doing my own thing over here & may be chillin in hell but at least, even if i’m sad i don’t exactly get to consistently interact w ppl, it only matters to me if i get the attention from ppl i genuinely like anyways. i could drop off the face of the planet & probably the biggest giveaway was that i had reblogged a joke in a few days but wtf does that matter anyway. some of us got to be on the tangents still w no friends. not because its necessary but b/c it happens and it has to be someone, might as well be me or you. it happens to be me, thats for sure

[markblush]

shoot okay i'm glad i sent that second msg haha CONGRATS ON FINISHING THE SEMESTER :D i think i saw that you're studying art :0 what year are you in? but ikr it's insane that 2020 is almost over.. omg i haven't played animal crossing since june 😭 i'm doing pretty well!! i finish the semester next week so i'm still drowning but theres a light :') tbh i havent really been able to sit down and listen to their stuff lately cause of school but i do like 90s love + deja vu! i also really like the styling for 90s love too so that's a bonus haha what are your fave songs?

AHH THANK YOU!!! Thought I would be pretty chill with online classes since I really enjoyed taking them in the past but this sem was... def smthn else! AHAHA It’s a whole lot different taking classes online nowadays since normally I’m on campus 24/7 working in the studios :’) And aaa yes that’s right! ^^ I’m technically in my 3rd yr (it’s a two yr program but I’ve been doing it on and off from full-time/part-time). And hbu! What are you studying? :O

AAAA stay strong!!!! You’re almost done!  👏 👏 👏 ONE WEEK LEFT THEN UR FREE TO CHILL FOR A BIT AHH 😭 and I’m also happy to hear you’re doing well!! ^-^ and ahhh same with me! I definitely took some time off ac bc I got a bit burnt out and tbh I still can’t make up my mind on what I want my island to look like xD After I got the island customizer tool thing I demolished my whole island and wiped it clean of trees and my river and everything then after I kinda had an idea but then went back and demolished again ahaha IT’S A NEVER ENDING CYCLE  😔

Ahhh NICE NICE!!! Tbh yeah this album’s been super solid and I’m super duper happy to see them mixing up the lineups :’)))) hMM I think my favourite title track is MAW (dude i really loved their outfits and everyone looked and sounded so gOOD OOF  😔 ✊ ✊ ✊) and for the b-sides I really loved Nectar and I.O.U. ^^ and DUDE YEAH Deja Vu with 7dream is just  👌 👌 👌 a BLESSING :’))))

also hope your day has been going well today!!!! WHEN UR STUDYING PLS DRINK LOTS OF WATER, TAKE BREAKS AND REMEMBER TO EATTTT  🙏 🙏 🙏 STAY STRONG!!!!!!!!

[itskimtaehyung]

life updates

I feel like i’ve been kind of MIA lately in terms of updating tumblr and all that. Like usually nowadays I just fill up my queue and then log off and I dont really make that many personal posts or original content all that much lately.

Firstly, I want to update you all on all the new stuff I’ve been working on. I started a new painting series which is basically a Yeontan BT21 crossover. I have some ideas for continuing that circle painting series with OT7. I have Yoongi finished and I chose a color scheme for Hoseok. I did a painting for Hoseok’s birthday and I tried a new style that I’ve never done before and I’m really happy with how it turned out I can’t wait for you guys to see it!

In terms of writing, I’m currently working on a YoongixReader fic but it’s going slowly mainly because it’s kind of based on my life and I want to tell the story properly. I have a few scenes writing for some other fics but I don’t have concrete ideas or plots for them yet and I don’t know if I ever will. I plan on finishing the Always series but I’m not happy with the original plan I had for the series so I still have to rewrite my original ending. As for Jeon Jungkook is dead, I wrote part 1 very spur of the moment and honestly I dont remember what I wanted for part 2. I dont know if I’ll ever finish it tbh.

Now that those are out of the way, time for personal updates. As some of you may know, I started uni back in september. Before that I was going to community college to complete my general education requirements and now I’m taking courses that are very focused on my major aka the hard stuff. Also, we’re finally getting into the rocket science courses and they’re really cool!!! My workload is a lot heavier lately and I barely have time for sleep let alone writing and drawing. I’m taking 5 classes this quarter which may or may not have been a mistake but like homegirl wants to graduate on time.

For those of you who were following me during the whole “thirst boi” thing, no, i never hooked up with him, however, he is now one of my very good friends and has introduced me to another guy who’s also become a close friend. Like one time i slept over at their place and we baked cookies and watched cartoons. 

I also mentioned a “cute boy” in one of my classes a while back. I think most of my posts were about wanting to talk to him but not knowing how. Well, I finally talked to him after midterms last quarter, we we also became very good friends. At one point I thought he really liked me. We would do homework together and he would offer to drive me home if we stayed late at the library. I was spending nearly all day everyday with him (and I still do). But sadly, I found out after the quarter ended that he has a girlfriend. tbh I still really like him and sometimes it’s hard spending so much time with him but not being able to be with him ya know? I honestly think the universe is working against me because he is literally like everything I look for in a guy. And he smells like something from my childhood???? Also one time he came over to my apartment when we had a break in between classes and he talked to my housemates and they all really got along with him and also really liked him, *sigh* You’ll see a lot of him in Yoongi in that fic i was talking about earlier.

i dont think I ever told you guys about my housemates. I’m living with one of my best friends from middle school and a few other people. Theyre all super nice and I’m so grateful to live with such amazing people. We all get along so well and have “house outings” on a regular basis. A couple of weeks ago we all went together to get 순두부 for one of their birthdays, and today three of us got pizza together after class and then four of us went together to get boba. And whenever we’re stressed or just need to wind down, we sit on the floor of the living room together (we dont have a couch or like furniture really) and talk and eat snacks and complain about our days etc. and two fo them like kpop/khh too! and we listen to it together from time to time. and we have ramen nights where some of us will cook ramen and just eat it together on the floor. we also tease each other a lot which is fun to some extent but can also be kind of annoying. one of the guys is a couple years ahead of me in school but we’re the same major so sometimes he helps me with homework. I’m also on a design project with him which is also pretty fun. I learned how to use a laser cutter for the project so that was really cool.

It’s midnight and i have to get up at 6:30 tomorrow for class but I still havent showered but im still really full from the pizza and only drank a quarter of my milk tea (its strawberry) (i luv strawberry). Anyway, that’s what’s been going on in my life for the last 5 wish months or so? to my old followers, thanks for sticking with me this long. And to my new followers, welcome, thanks for hitting that follow button. I am grateful to every single one of you for supporting me and encouraging me and giving me a safe place to complain or vent or whatever else i need to. also my housemate caught me writing this and he asked to be included in it lmao. his words were “are you writing about me? are you including any of my jokes in your post? am i not funny enough to be included in your tumblr posts?” and then he told me to tell yall that he caught me writing this and he wanted to be included. I dont think he’d ever be able to find my blog because I dont have it searchable by email nor do i use my real name but oh boy if he’s reading this, thats really creepy of you, tyler.

[mushmeyers]

Do you have any ocs in/out of the newbies verse?

YES i DO!!! i actually posted a drawing of one just a few days ago! you can see my ocs in my ocs tag here !!! (and scouts ocs- who my ocs often interact w :P)

the oc im easily the most attached to is pogo… shes My Girl. she runs a lodging house in chelsea, manhattan (like, shes the head newsie in charge) and i really enjoy her because she goes from being someone who always errs on the side of caution to the point that she hesitates to take risks for things she believes in and risks for the sake of her own happiness, but (usually with the help of her amazing beautiful wonderful gf dice) she learns that there are always things are worth the risk and she needs to sometimes prioritise her own happiness over keeping everyone happy or even safe… i really love her. other than rambling about her character development, she’s a fun loving kinda gossipy chill girl. she likes parties and socialising and people (good people)!!! and shes super bi and transmy other ocs are needles and striker who have a little less work done on them than pogo but i still love them dearly. needles is a newsies in queens (she also runs a lodging house), and shes pretty direct and to the point. not only does she sew (originally to patch clothes but its developed as a hobby too!), but shes also a pretty sharp person and can appear prickly though shes really not, she just has a tendancey to keep to herself and can even be rather shy. well. she is actually pretty easily annoyed tbh. but shes not MEAN. just… keeps to herself! though shes really good w kids because though shes not exactly nurturing, shes firm in a good way? idk its hard to describe but shes really grounding sometimes.shes a very organised, efficient person- she loves a good roster or chart, but shes less good at talking to people…  anyways its really nice to write about her coming out of her shell a bit and feeling more comfortable around people (like her gf… yes allmy newsies ocs are gay and have gfs . problem?)strikers characterisation relies heavily on where in her arc you are…shes kinda  a character based in her character development ig if that makes sense?? but no matter what shes really tough, and self sufficient (though part of her character is that even though she doesnt need peoples help she eventually learns to accept it.) shes quiet and protective. shes had a lot of trauma in her life, and she has great difficulty trusting people or feeling very secure- she has a lot of sleep issues and such. she used to get herself hurt a lot because she also doesnt back down from what she believes in- to the point where she got into fights. however since she started staying at the lodging house in harlem full time, shes become a lot better at facilitating that need to do the right thing into helping other people out- she helped her now-gf pins with transitioning, and she helps out a lot around the lodging house nowadays. she loves her baby gay+trans daughter pollicle. strikers ramble has been really confusing sorry but basically shes super tough and used to get herself hurt a whole bunch but now she lives safer and happier (while still being tough but in a different way.) i also have like, a buncha named ocs who i havent worked on as much who are kinda bg charas to my main ocs stories usually… like bumble, terrier, coats, einstein, owl, and fringe (im not the best at naming newsies LMAO)

[itsspiderpenguin]

Meh: 11/08/19 4:33am

I'm just going to go on a little self indulgent rant about my life and feel like recording this, I really don't care whether you read this or not and it'll probably just be a waste of time because you don't know me. But still moving on to the point of this post which is that I've become somewhat aware of my growing apathy towards everything in life. Tbh I don't really know when it started and I don't even really know how intense it is. But the thing is that I remember when I was a child some of my friends went to see a film without me and I cried so hard and felt like the entire world had hated me because my friends went to the cinema without me and why would they do that if not because they couldn't stand being in my presence. And then in secondary school my two best friends stopped talking to me (for good reason but I digress) and I felt so miserable and worthless yet again. And in the first case I ended up completely losing contact with them and even today its been years and years since we last spoke. And I remember just realising that I had lost contact and it broke my heart because I didn't think anyone else would be able to stand me. Coming back to nowadays I've just finished college where I had met a fair few new friends and we spent basically all of our college time and time outside of college together. Playing games, helping each other revise, gossiping and so much more. And I came to the realisation that as usual I havent kept in contact with any of them. And yet I don't care. Not in the slightest, the most amount of emotion that I could sum up was "eh that's a shame" and I don't understand why. What's happened that's caused me to become so uncaring towards others, why is it so easy for me to let people leave my life? And this next point could just me being lazy but I've found that I have zero motivation to do anything. I've stopped going rock climbing, I got fired because I had no motivation to leave my bed. And now that I've got so much free time I do nothing but lie in bed and think about how I got into this situation. I try and do something, whether it be dancing or playing games ot reading or walking or learning a language or learning to draw or playing guitar but I always get bored of it barely even a few minutes into the activity. There just doesn't seem to be anything that makes me feel happy. Like I've become interested in BTS but tbh even that excitment is wearing thin and there's only so many times you can hear the same song. And another thing I've realised is that my birthday is in 8 days and I'm finally going to be 18, a legal adult where I can legally do most things, and yet I just don't care at all. Like there's no excitment, no fear, just nothing. So yeah things are weird but who knows maybe I'll get bored of feeling bored and actually get off my ass and do something

[whatsjungkooking]

1-92💪🏻

1. Would you have sex with the last person you text messaged?

- nooooooooooooooooooooooooo

2. You talked to an ex today, correct?

- incorrect

3. Have you taken someones virginity?

- nope

4. Is trust a big issue for you?

- not a big issue but people tend to mess about nowadays

5. Did you hang out with the person you like recently?

- yes my bf

6. What are you excited for?

- hopefully passing my driving test

7. What happened tonight?

- my mum and i went to mcdonalds through the drive thru and i got a chicken legend we nEVER go to mcdonalds but my mum didnt want to cook for tea so we went there

8. Do you think it’s disgusting when girls get really wasted?

- no its their decision i just wouldnt do it myself

9. Is confidence cute?

- in some situations yes

10. What is the last beverage you had?

- water

11. How many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust?

- like 4

12. Do you own a pair of skinny jeans?

- all of my jeans are skinny, its to that point now where i feel really weird if my jeans/trousers arent skinny

13. What are you gonna do Saturday night?

- going bowling and for a meal for a friends birthday

14. What are you going to spend money on next?

- bowling and the meal HAHA

15. Are you going out with the last person you kissed?

- yes

16. Do you think you’ll change in the next 3 months?

- probably not to be honest

17. Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything?

- jess and lauren

18. The last time you felt broken?

- in February 

19. Have you had sex today?

- no

20. Are you starting to realize anything?

- ive realised im biting the inside of my cheeks 

21. Are you in a good mood?

- at the moment yes

22. Would you ever want to swim with sharks?

- no thank yooouuu

23. Are your eyes the same color as your dad’s?

- yes but a bit darker

24. What do you want right this second?

- water and lipbalm

25. What would you say if the person you love/like kissed another girl/boy?

- b y e

26. Is your current hair color your natural hair color?

- the majority yes 

27. Would you be able to date someone who doesn’t make you laugh?

- no way that is like number 1

28. What was the last thing that made you laugh?

- a video on fb i laughed so much my hip popped

29. Do you really, truly miss someone right now?

- yasss

30. Does everyone deserve a second chance?

- it depends what theyve done

31. Honestly, do you hate the last boy you were talking to?

- definitely not

32. Does the person you have feelings for right now, know you do?

- yes

33. Are you one of those people who never drinks soda?

- nah i loooooove it

34. Listening to?

- body talk by red velvet

35. Do you ever write in pencil anymore?

- tbh not in a while, theres always pens lying about never really pencils

36. Do you know where the last person you kissed is?

- at his house 

37. Do you believe in love at first sight?

- i do not, no 

38. Who did you last call?

- sainsburys, that was last week, i dont call very often

39. Who was the last person you danced with?

- my dad 

40. Why did you kiss the last person you kissed?

- bc i was saying goodbye

41. When was the last time you ate a cupcake?

- a few weeks ago??

42. Did you hug/kiss one of your parents today?

- i think i hugged both 

43. Ever embarrass yourself in front of a crush?

- quite a few times

44. Do you tan in the nude?

- even if i did the sun would still only catch my hands and id only tan my hands

45. If you could, would you take back your last kiss?

- no waaaaaay

46. Did you talk to someone until you fell asleep last night?

- i dont think so

47. Who was the last person to call you?

- my mum

48. Do you sing in the shower?

- when im the only one in the house i do yes

49. Do you dance in the car?

- i move my shoulders about HAHA

50. Ever used a bow and arrow?

- at school at some point 

51. Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer?

- school photo

52. Do you think musicals are cheesy?

- it depends which one bc for example wicked, thats a musical and thats not cheesy but some musicals are purposely meant to be cheesy

53. Is Christmas stressful?

- not for me but probably for my mum

54. Ever eat a pierogi?

- da heck is tHAT

55. Favorite type of fruit pie?

- im not really a fan of fruit pies

56. Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid?

- manager of asda or an author

57. Do you believe in ghosts?

- yes

58. Ever have a Deja-vu feeling?

- quite a few times

59. Take a vitamin daily?

- i used to have tablets but theyre very easy to forget about...

60. Wear slippers?

- all the time giiirrrrrl

61. Wear a bath robe?

- a dressing gown? only when im cold

62. What do you wear to bed?

- pyjamas

63. First concert?

- the saturdays

64. Wal-Mart, Target or Kmart?

- none we dont have any of those here

65. Nike or Adidas?

- oooooo thats tough, maybe nike just edges in front bc ive bought more items that are nike

66. Cheetos Or Fritos?

- wotsits

67. Peanuts or Sunflower seeds?

- peanuts

68. Favorite Taylor Swift song?

- love story

69. Ever take dance lessons?

- i have not no

70. Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing?

- he do what he gunna do

71. Can you curl your tongue?

- yes 

72. Ever won a spelling bee?

- we dont have spelling bees so i have not

73. Have you ever cried because you were so happy?

- mainly of laughter 

74. What is your favorite book?

- shatter me, probably bc i keep mentioning it its the first one that comes to mind

75. Do you study better with or without music?

- without, i need complete silence

76. Regularly burn incense?

- nope

77. Ever been in love?

- yes 

78. Who would you like to see in concert?

- bts, gfriend, snsd, little mix maybe, ellie goulding maybe 

79. What was the last concert you saw?

- the saturdays

80. Hot tea or cold tea?

- neither 

81. Tea or coffee?

- neither 

82. Favorite type of cookie?

- chocolate chip

83. Can you swim well?

- im okay HAHA i struggled when i was younger 

84. Can you hold your breath without holding your nose?

- i can yes

85. Are you patient?

- i would say so, especially recently bc apps have been crashing on my ipad lately and i havent gone mad yet 

86. DJ or band, at a wedding?

- maybe DJ

87. Ever won a contest?

- quite a few, the first one i won was a harry potter competition in a really girly magazine and i went for it bc i thought no girl would go for it and i won, i have a flipping quidditch helmet and a huge bag

88. Ever have plastic surgery?

- nope

89. Which are better black or green olives?

- nONE THEY ARE GROSS

90. Opinions on sex before marriage?

- why not

91. Best room for a fireplace?

- living room

92. Do you want to get married?

- yes please

[mariska]

18 - 25 c:

omg thank u thea!! :D

18 - Worst game you’ve played 

oh man this is a tricky one…when i was a kid i used to play all those like bratz doll games and barbie games but some of those barbie games are legit fun so like i dont wanna call them the worst ever yknow? i paid like 50 dollars for that mmo game Defiance when it first came out (of course its free to play now too) and ended up logging like 3 hours tops into it and then going ‘why am i playing this its so bad’ so that would probably have to be my pick LOL

19 - Hardest game you’ve ever played

i am so not into difficult games at all because my frustration level rises very easily and if i get too frustrated then i just end up not playing and never finishing what i was doing ksjfsdlkfjsdlkfs. i love the Binding of Isaac but i’ve never actually beaten it before, also Brutal Legend is so fun and i cosplayed one of the main characters a few years ago but was never actually able to beat that one either

20 - Favorite publisher and/or developer

OH JEEZ OH JEEZ i mean, i have a very special place in my heart for Valve games, i am literally wearing my portal sweatshirt right now and i used to have a ‘Bonk’ sweatshirt from tf2 that i loved (as well as like, a whole buncha other portal/tf2/l4d merchandise scattered around my house) so if i absolutely had to pick it would probably be them. i love Blizzard as of recent bcus of Overwatch and i’ve been following their activity a little bit since that came out…also i kind of have to mention Harmonix in here somewhere because the amount of time i’ve put into guitar hero and rock band games in my life is absolutely ridiculous. also Maxis probably because the sims. this was supposed to be one answer fjdgdhfgkjd

21 - If you had to play one game for the rest of your life, what would it be?

honestly like…probably either one of the Sims games or if i’m being entirely honest SSX 3? LMAO. ssx 3 was one of the first games i got into as a kid and i still play it a lot on my ps2 and i really love it

22 - If you could turn one game into a movie, which would it be?

hmmmmMMM…….tbh i’ve wanted someone to make a Left 4 Dead movie forever and i would be really happy if that ever happened at some point, but i would want it to include the characters from both of the games yknow??

23 - Favorite genre of video game?

fps probably, its what i play most often nowadays. i also really like music/rhythm games, rpgs and fighting games, but im like, really really bad at fighting games as much as i try not to be loool

24 - Ever cried because of a video game? Which one(s)?

HOO BOY i am the biggest cry baby ever so i cry at everything basically klsdfjsdlkf, The Walking Dead game ruined my entire life when i played it and i still havent recovered from the way season 1 ended, im pretty sure i cried at the end of season 2 as well (havent played season 3 yet because i am lazy and poor), im pretty sure i cried at the end of Undertale, Tales from the Borderlands made me tear up a lil bit, DEFINITELY lost my shit at the end of Portal 2 the first time i played…if theres a game thats supposed to make u emotional by the end of it and ive played it i guarantee u i’ve bawled

25 - Proudest accomplishment in gaming?

absolutely getting every achievement in Lollipop Chainsaw lmao. i think thats the only game i’ve gotten every achievement in except for ones that give u achievements for finishing all the parts of the game and stuff like that. i got some pretty tricky achievements in portal 2 back in the day too and i remember being rly happy about that

[zonerz]

Hamilton AU ramblings

//Kicks down door AIGHT YALL TIME FOR ME TO RAMBLE–

Okay so Ive been seeing lil Hamilton AU thingies pop up for Overwatch here and there, not too many but enough that I wanted to ramble abt a chara and who I feel they’d fit 👈👈

Ok so I know a common lil thing popping up is Hanzo and Genji taking the Schuyler Sisters place, and damn that is some good stuff, I do love me some loving bros and love triangle angst 👌👌👌👌

But what I havent really seen that much, and this rlly surprises me tbh, is Hanzo as Burr.

Now hear me out ok? Lmao. Im going to describe one of them, and as you’re reading I want you to guess whom Im describing.

This man is a man who promised to carry on their family’s legacy, especially promising their father, whom had passed away. Everything was on the right track for that to come true, for them to grow and be great. They also have someone that they care for greatly, for they start as pretty close to almost best of friends; but over time, as their ambitions grow, said person keeps causing problems for them. They grow distant, and become angry, envious and act impulsive on this, especially with one last thing pushing them over the edge. They attack the person whom they had once held rather close, “killing” them. This act caused them immeasurable guilt and everything that they had built and tried to achieve crumbled with this newfound blood on their hands. They have no chance of rebuilding what they once had, their legacy is ruined as they realize and regret their actions; The world was wide enough for them both. Nowadays, even though their decisions and what side they truly stand on is questionable, deep down there’s still good in them, you’d just have to dig to find it.

Y'see where Im coming from now? 👈👈 Idk I just felt this was a cool idea for an AU and felt it has a lot of potential for AngstTM But this is just my opinion lol

Also Bonus for the shippers:

You can make whomever u ship Hanzo with Theodosia for sadness, but fyi, Burr remarried later in his life if ur a sucker for happy endings like I am 👌👌

[beaulesbian]

TAG You're it! Once you get this say 5 things that you like about yourself publicly and then send this to 10 of your favorite followers!(non-negotiable) SPREAD POSITIVITY!

thank you!!♥

hmm okay..

im glad i finally found work, it took me a year of procrastinating, and the search (or not search) caused me lot of anxiety, bc i hate doing things where i dont know all details (like just going to the interview was so scary), anyway i managed to put my worries aside for a bit and now im happy, kinda,..

i havent been sick in like half a year, which is unbelievable to me, because when i was going to school i was sick all the time, now that i look back at it, i stayed at home a lot bc of depression and anxieties, but i didnt know that before and it caused me even more depression bc i thought i was just making things up.. so yeah.. not being sick for a while now, bc no school yey :)))

i still have my little christmas plastic tree on my table, because i either forget to clean it up or just am too lazy, i dont know if this is a thing i like about myself, that i leave seasonal stuff half a year later still decorated lol, but its a fact and i dont know what more should i write here

i like my music taste

i really like my blog, tbh i dont have much time for it nowadays, bc again work, but i try to queue up posts, and lately i post here whatever i like, so i love it!