#tbh Jim and Archie are cute together

[the-lesbian-orpheus]

I SAW ALL THREE EPISODES AND NOW IM WATCHING AGAIN AND IM WATCHING AGAIN NOW AND I GET TO WATCH AGAIN TOMORROW WITH MY PARENTS (if I don’t before then lol)

ANYWAY FIRST THREE EPISODES WERE IN FACT “FUCKING SWEET SLUTS”

I actually almost cried happy tears this morning lmao

And since I got my friend into it we got to talk to each other about it which is magical

But like ugh the costumes, and songs, and darkness, and goofiness, and ALL THE CALLBACKS

IM SO UNWELL OVER THE SILLY GAY PIRATES AND ITS ONLY EPISODE 3

Also didn’t know this was possible but I’m even more insane about Jim now

Vico ortiz man

(I am also unwell over Ed, Archie, and Zheng lmao- pan panic is real)

BUT ALSO JIM AND OLU WHY ARE THEY BEING DRAGGED APART

[childofwonder]

Haven’t talked about how much I desperately love Archie yet, she’s my favourite new character this season and I want MORE. I want back story (outside of the snake cult which is cool as hell) and I want more characterization. Obviously that’s not happening this season because they cut down the amount of episodes this season, which was a strength of last season tbh. Also her and Jim together make a lot of sense the same way Olu and Jim made sense. I love them all spending time together and being a trio. It’s really cute.

I like that because Archie is new to the crew she has to make a name for herself with everyone else, she ends up being the one bringing the crew together in some ways. She might have a craving for attention and affection (which makes sense because we know so little about her and she could definitely have been alone for a long time before getting into blackbeards crew) and now she can finally be in a crew that shares stories and experiences, talks about how they feel(sometimes) and cares about each other. It’s really sweet

[izzy-b-hands]

Watching Prince vids to find some new ones to gif and have realised i absolutely need to write either modern au Ed and Izzy fucking at a Prince concert (u know Ed's essentially cosplaying as Prince for the show, as he should, and there's this one outfit of Prince's that's a v Izzy shirt with a tight jumpsuit that I bet Izzy would happily wear both for Ed and bc. it's cute as fuck lol) that turns into a bit of steddyhands

Or. if i can wiggle around how electric guitars work in the canon time (can i just say they do and not worry abt it lmao), I'm equally down for writing it like.

Fuck it, mini sort of fic time for this version of it. nsfw and horny edizzy into steddyhands below the cut

Canon time version of this is like

Post s2, in an au version where everyone is well and fine (the only version i personally fuck with rn tbh bc u guys Know my feelings on actual s2 lol)

Ed and Izzy have been working on things. Slowly, painfully, and tbh, they still communicate in a way that's like. Absolutely odd and not great to anyone except the two of them and the few crew members who are starting to figure it out or already had some understanding of it (ex. Stede for the former and Fang for the latter)

But there's a show at this port, tonight. A fairly famous bard, that Ed's maybe always wanted to see (let's be real, he adds the maybe in bc he feels bad abt wanting to go, to spend a night away from the ship and Responsibilities, the same shit that kept him feeling tied to being Blackbeard)

It doesn't take much to convince him tho, once Izzy admits that actually he thinks it would be good for everyone to go, and Stede eagerly agrees. They'll go as a group, but everyone can vibe and do their own thing as they want at the show (aka The Swede is in Jackie's lap for most of it, Zheng and Olu and Jim and Archie are all over each other in between dance breaks, and it's just a nice time out for one night where even the navy officers in the crowd that are poorly disguised aren't gonna start any shit)

He's basically vibrating with excitement after Stede and Izzy start talking wardrobe for the show, and then suddenly they're tearing apart old stolen clothes to stitch together to make new things and he's going out in something tight, silk, different shades of purple and violet with black highlights to even it out (and some glitter, for good measure.) Izzy's smiling, helping get himself fitted into the jumpsuit that Wee John has insisted upon helping them sew together in time, adding extra black silk frills to an already black frilly shirt they've found amongst their pile of spoils (none of them like folding or hanging up clothes, so be it lol)

Add in that Stede and Izzy are taking turns making out with him mid-dress up and he's. on a fucking hair trigger by the time they go off the ship into the port, to the biggest pub there to join the crowd (Jackie notes it isn't as nice as her place was, and she's right, but it could be worse.)

Stede offers that they should go, the two of them, up closer to the front and he'll join them later (partially bc he needs a moment to adjust to the crowd which is full of pirates recognising him and Ed and Izzy and it's. v cool to him but also overwhelming considering how that went the last time at the republic of pirates), so they make their way until he's pressed gently into the front barrier, Izzy grinding against him from behind.

They're not dressed so they can hide much of anything, but everyone around them is seemingly there for the same thing and in the same sort of spirits, so they can play pretty freely. The ppl closest give them dreamy, eager, wanting looks as they watch, and he can't help but think yeah, they should be jealous. Doesn't matter if they're more jealous of Izzy for being with Ed or vice versa, it's a turn on both ways now for Ed (and he's realising he missed out on a lot by not appreciating the ppl who look at him with need in their eyes, bc he's the one taking Izzy fucking Hands home with him and not them.)

He can reach back and feel how wet Izzy is, knows the cream coloured pantsuit is probably showing it too (buttery soft and thin cream coloured silk, the brightest thing he's seen Izzy in in ages, and he wants him both in and out of it all at once lol.) His own cock is fighting against the purple silk and velvet skirt Wee John and Frenchie helped make, and he's mindful enough to not want to tear it, but he does want it pushed up so Izzy can start playing with his ass and cock

That's a step too far for the moment, but he grinds against Izzy like his life depends on it, and it's everything he wanted and more once Stede joins them. Surrounded by the men he loves being with, taking turns sneaking in kisses to them while the music plays (and the show is fucking amazing, Ye Olde Prince and his group egging everyone on to have fun and get nasty), and he's juuuust abt to come untouched when Stede and Izzy finally pull him towards the back of the crowd, where ppl are letting themselves really go for it

His eyes linger for a minute over the crew members nearby and what they're getting up to (in part bc Frenchie and Roach keep breaking away to come over and get their hands on Izzy, who moans so prettily whenever they or Stede or Ed touches him that it makes Ed ache)

But then it's Izzy on his knees pulling up Ed's skirt to suck him off, Stede behind him teasing his ass with a finger, leaving kisses and hickeys all over his neck and collarbone

He couldn't tell you much about the actual moment he cums, bc there's not a drop of blood going to his brain during it lol. He can hear the song that's playing (I've got a list for which it could be bc there are a lot of Prince songs that are on my edizzy and steddyhands lists), and he can feel Izzy swallowing it down while Stede grabs at his ass, toying with his hole (and making Ed wish they'd brought something as lube tbh), jerking himself off as best he can thru his trousers (tight, teal silk, a favourite for ed and izzy to see stede in)

After he's propped up between them for the rest of the show, taking turns teasing Stede through his trousers and rubbing at the front of Izzy's pantsuit (it's not near enough friction considering how hard Izzy grinds against his hand, stifling moans into Ed's shoulder)

The game plan was to return to the ship after the show, but an invitation from Ye Olde Prince's security guard to the backstage for the three of them means a few things:

finally access to lube and getting off with one of his favourite bards in the same room, with two of his favourite people, and the crew gets to have the ship all to themselves (something they were pretty blatantly hoping would happen in how they were talking before the show, and he can't blame them. There are a lot of fun places to fuck on the Revenge, and everyone deserves a chance to get themselves and whoever else they want off in them.)

Anyway. god. if i could draw I'd have sketches of their outfits too for u guys. but alas on that part of things akdnfjgn

[arsenicflame]

serangela, edizzy, ouizzy, and Jim/Archie (can't recall specific ship name for them, sorry to Jim & Archie for that 😅❤️) for the ship grading ask game?

oooh !!! many to fill.... thank u iz :)

Send me a ship and I will grade it:

SERANGELA

A+: OTP

oh you already knew my answer to this. 100/100 perfect score absolutely no notes. if serangela got more consistent content or i at least had people to talk to about them i would literally never look at another ship again. theyre just so,,,,,, my dear girls,,, im gonna be thinking about them for a while now thanks for that

EDIZZY

A+: OTP

Not as high as my girls im afraid, but if i had to pick one singular ofmd ship, this would be it! just,,, the depths of their dynamics consume me!!! sometimes i dont even ship it, i want to get them restraining orders and make them never see each other again*, but no matter what the vibe is with them, theres always something there with them for me and thats what draws me to them!

(*and other times i want to lock them in a room together anyway and see what happens. just for fun)

OUIZZY

C: Not a bad ship (positive!)

ha i went back on forth on the answer for this one for a Minute- ouizzy's sorta a weird one for me! its not a ship i have many original thoughts about usually but i do think its cute! ill read fics when the concept interests me and look at fanart but i dont often seek it out if that makes sense? but i have absolutely no qualms w them as a ship, and i think id have liked to see canon give them a few more interactions :') (still think about the leaning in the cell tbh....)

JIM/ARCHIE (i dont know their ship name either ''''''':) )

B: It’s really cute

im only rating jim/archie so low because i specifically love them as part of jim/olu/archie (& zheng also!) i do like what the two of them had together as part of the kraken crew specifically, but the moments with the three of them after are where i think the jim/archie element gets to shine, getting a chance to breathe and discover who they are together without circumstance forcing them together :)

[something-about-sunflowers]

Second verse, same as the first.

[Continuing where I left off]

Starting off strong, Izzy paying back the sword slap. ;)c

Nasty cut on his forehead. :'(c

Leg. :'(c

100% It's part of the figurehead tho. I do hope he gets something properly suited to him eventually but it's very sweet of them to give up a bit of the ship for Izzy's sake. (No scarf.)

The gloves are definitely because Stede's rich person baby-hands don't have the calluses he'd need to not be bleeding from handling all those lines. They'll probably handwave the bleeding when he takes them off but he'll definitely be complaining about it beforehand. (No scarf.)

Sorry, this is a nice shot of them but I really just don't see the appeal of the Stiddies in comparison to Izzy's beautiful bountiful tits. Respect tho. Earring. Who's he talking to? Is this before or after the Torture Party? This is the same shirt. (No scarf.)

Fang either trying to get someone to stop talking or trying to calm himself down. Looks like it might be either right before the storm or right after.

Last Voyage of the Demeter Revenge. Shouting out Tizzy again for suggesting they might think Lucius is their vampire. I think it might be Izzy? Depending on when they do the amputation (like, before they run into Stede and co or after) he'd be looking pretty undead if the infection is bad enough to need it. But also something about this shot is so cute. They look like they're all hanging out at a sleepover or something.

I forgot for a sec why I actually took this SC. I was too distracted by Izzy. . . He's whittling. Fuel for my headcanon that Pete WAS on Blackbeard's crew, just exaggerating his importance and maybe a lot younger, and Izzy taught him how to whittle.

Anyway.

This isn't the revenge. (No scarf.)

I've seen people suggest a gunshot or a stab wound but this looks more like a cigar burn to me? There'd be more blood if it was a shot or a stab, a cigar would cauterize tho so it wouldn't bleed. Also imo it fits the 'torture' aspect a bit more.

This also confirms it's Stede tied to the mast in the big scream shot. (No scarf.)

Roach looks like he's having fun tbh.

The sound is definitely screaming but I can't help but think this looks like laughing. Especially Archie? Are they actually experiencing torture or are they trying to fuckery this for some reason and Archie can't keep it together/finds it too funny?

Like this could be celebrating after the fact if it was a fuckery? Could also just be actual torture and this is before all that though. Idk. (No scarf.)

Same shirt as torture party. Before or after? Still not convinced Ed and Stede are fighting the same fight here but we'll see. (No scarf.)

Ok so this confuses me SO much. This LOOKS like them sneaking onto the Revenge after the storm. BUT.

I'm pretty sure -

- this is right before the zipline shot. Which means Izzy, Jim, Frenchie, Fang, and Archie are WITH Stede and co when they do this. Stede says 'escape' so are they being held hostage by the Chinese pirates?

Ed's face is so fucking funny in this scene. Also what is on him? It doesn't look like his jacket? Or at least it doesn't look like he's wearing it properly if it IS? With the context of Izzy and co being with Stede when they're sneaking on the Revenge I. I have to wonder if. Did they tie Ed up so he'd listen to Stede/wouldn't be able to kill him immediately? That would explain the headbutt. (OR. This is a rescue mission and Stede and co are infiltrating the Chinese pirates to RESCUE Ed/Izzy and co? And they're escaping to the Revenge?)

Many thoughts, head full.

(Back to it.) Still convinced this isn't the same fight Stede's in. Ed looks hurt tho. Also there's blood on his sword.

Jim has a sword Jim has a sword Jim has a sword Jim has a sword Jim has a sword Jim has a sword. Izzy's forehead cut. :(c Pete looks like he's still wearing the Chinese fit.

Also how the FUCK did Stede know to turn around? Pete didn't give any indication and Stede is the FIRST to move, the only one besides Archie who's got their back fully to the attacker too. (Ring spotted.)

You can just barely see it but Izzy's got the prosthetic.

Literally frames apart but I wanted to point out how ready they all are to fight. Even Frenchie! (Except Archie who seems confused.)

Gonna die on this hill but this conversation is in no way indicative of a romance between the characters having it. This expression is exhausted contempt to my eyes.

But also: Sobbing my eyes out that they gave Izzy this line. Feeling SO vindicated but also just. Feeling It in general. (Ring spotted.)

And this face doesn't exactly scream 'being romanced' either. This reads as 'being told something they don't want to hear'.

Lucius spotted. They're fuckerying the soldiers. Lucius and Frenchie are wearing uniforms.

Queen. Presented without further comment.

I wanna say something like 'it should have been me' but no, honestly Olu deserves this look 1000 times over.

So Stede steals the WHOLE outfit and the shirt is RED. This might be right before the guy tries to come up behind Stede on deck, if it's the same ship at all.

Jim behind Stede. (No scarf.)

Trying to figure out where the fuck this is. There looks to be a small dock or something in the distance and there are people moving on it.

Can't tell if they gave the Swede a haircut or if it's tied up (or both)? I'll say again tho, good for him.

I honestly can't say I'm a fan of some of the fashion/fabric anachronisms this season but maybe they'll make more sense in the scenes themselves? Anyway Jackie's shirt splits in the middle to show off her cleavage I'm pretty sure.

Ed is so offended and yknow what? I'll say it again: good for the Swede. Ed almost got him eaten. He can take a few knocks at his outfit.

I have so many words in my head right now and most of them are screaming. We're not gonna fucking survive this season I swear. David if your viewership drops sharply all of the sudden, know it's you're fault, just Not Like That. It'll be because you killed us, David. You Magnificent Bastard.

Alright, *cracks knuckles, back, pussy, crack, etc* more trailer to break down.

Mirror image of the shot in the teaser? Was it flipped for a reason or are we getting more than one scene like this? What boat are they on? It's not the dinghy, not the revenge (I don't THINK?), and they're not dressed the way they are with the Chinese pirates. (Red scarf presence noted.)

Speaking of: Is this 'Susan' he's talking to? This has to be early on, he's not got his cunty little earring yet. (Just trying to nail SOME of the timeline down, you understand.)

Scarf. Feeling more and more sure it's Ed's silk.

Oluwande 💚. The way this dialogue is cut seems like they're skipping something, the way Olu says 'you dumped him' doesn't flow with the conversation the way it would if it was a immediate response to Stede's 'no, why would he do that?'

Presented without comment.

They're eating the wedding cake. :)

This is presumably happening while Ed is throwing knives at Izzy's head. :(

Anyway. This looks like they're definitely trying to get Blackbeard to stop -

- doing this so they can get through the storm or tell him something's gone wrong. Maybe Izzy's foot/leg gets real bad during the storm? Could be a lot of things.

Initially I thought this might be a precursor to him menacing Frenchie in the one shot in the EW article, but that's in the galley not Stede's cabin and this is a bucket full of bottles (alcohol) and with Frenchie it's a box with bottles (containers, possibly food but I think it looks more likely to be medicine)

(for reference)

I think this is in the auxiliary wardrobe, bride figure in the top right.

Izzy looks MISERABLE here. Whether it's the idea of him knowing EXACTLY why they're at a wedding or because he's in a hell of a lot of pain (foot still present and infected and all that) or some unfortunate combination of both (likely both), I want to wrap him up in a blanket burrito and give him forehead kissies. Also, wider shot here lets me update who's where on the topdown, so:

Jim

Izzy

Frenchie

Fang

Archie

Unnamed bald one with the studded bracers behind Izzy in the previous shot

Ed. Ed you are like. Consistently seen smoking from a pipe. You can't handle a blunt? Or is the weed too dank? Also, pretty sure this is him and Anne and/or the person she's with in the shots a bit after this.

This is why I thought it might have been the shot from the EW article but again, different container with different miscellanea and different room. He. Does seem to be. Interacting with Frenchie a lot though. And. This instance seems very specifically similar to. To him interacting with. A certain someone else. In season 1. . . I'm not saying Izzy's out with a case of Leg Gone and Ed's leaning on Frenchie in the aftermath. . . but.

I feel this so hard. We've all been there Ed. Anyway I'm pretty sure this is the same place he's smoking with mysterious, mostly offscreen, light skin-toned hand person who may or may not be Anne and/or her friend. (No scarf.)

Genuinely I feel like the nose staying on his face would look more believable without the ribbon. Lucius didn't need a ribbon for his finger. Maybe if it was horizontal as opposed to diagonal? It looks LOOSE and that makes it seem like it's not secure enough to be staying on his face like it is.

Deserved (the punch). My baby's leg tho. :'(c It's not even the right height for him. Look how he's gotta bend his other leg just standing.

Olu fighting someone???

Bracer looks like guy number 6 from the wedding raid but this doesn't look like it's on a ship. This guy also seems to have a beard or something that the other guy didn't so idk.

Cracked the code here thanks to @tizzyizzy pointing out something in my server. I was right about this not being during the storm. I was wrong about it being a possibly mutiny. I'm gonna jump a bit ahead in the trailer in a sec to explain but: Ed's got a rock tied around his waist here. You can see the rock at the bottom of the screen.

You can see the line go taut and pull him down.

You can see the rock continue to pull him down. (The rock is right at the bottom of the screen.)

Jumping ahead in the trailer and. Well. Rock with some rope tied around it. (Once again, thank you Tizzy 🙏 you eagle eyed hero) The lighting certainly matches better than the storm did. The question is: Is Hornighost trying to talk him into it or out of it? (And. Yknow. Is he a ghost at all, even?)

Back to where we jumped from. Are these guys wearing the same clothes as the guy Stede 'did a punch' to? Looks like it. *Black Pete voice* What IS this fucking timeline!

Love that Izzy is the only one who doesn't duck away. Also 👀 Lucius spotted. Is he holding hands with Jim? He certainly seems comfortable positioned right between the two little killers doesn't he? ;3c

'Oh no my boat :'(c' Is anyone still on board or did they take a dinghy and get outta there after the storm?

This.

(New promo pic.) This.

(Skipping ahead in the trailer.) And this, are all the same version of Stede. The outfit (weird little arm flappies, red sash) and location are the same. This is absolutely a dream sequence. Stede is dreaming about being the kind of pirate he wishes he was. I'd also venture as to guess this is the extent of his 'revenge on Izzy' that Some Of You are all so clamoring for.

[Out of allowed images, please hold]

[bular]

Welcome to Live Commentary

I had no one to talk to while watching the movie and I hate being alone with my thoughts so I wrote everything down in my notes app. It's not coherent! Enjoy!

Aw yeah 1.5 seconds of Bular that is all I needed! Might as well stop now I've seen my boy I'm satisfied.

Why is there a nearly 4 minute recap as if I haven't watched the show at least 50 times. I should be the one giving the recap.

The beginning felt a bit forced to me but maybe that's just me? Like they just tried to squeeze too many things into a small timeframe without any buildup, it just didn't really work. Congrats on the engagement! This is my OTP so I'm very happy! But it came out of nowhere.

Nari in Douxies body is so wrong and I love it and hate it at the same time (positive)

Eli is BIG. I knew he was gonna be tall but I was not prepared for that chiseled face. Or the fact that he stepped off the ship without glasses? I wear glasses and I would not choose to step off a spaceship blind.

OkAY who had mpreg on their bingo card?

AAARRRGGHH actually said a full sentence 🥺 there is no heterosexual explanation for this scene and I'm here for it

Arcadia being the center of the universe really does make a lot of sense. I hate how much sense it makes. Despise it.

Strickler in a Christmas sweater is something i didn't know I needed. Jim's jacket too but that's just adorable, Jim's adorable. Oh sweet baby you're about to get fucked over so bad.

Love seeing Barbara actively participating in battle too. Good for her! Power family!!

Where are the kids tho? Is NotEnrique babysitting? Either that or they hired the girl from the Incredibles movie.

Nomura is so talented I love seeing her fighting on the good side. I can't explain it but I love digitigrade legs they're just so pretty?? Aesthetically pleasing??? Fuck yeah, legg! I could watch Nomura run around and be badass all day.

WAIT NO OH SHIT HOW DARE YOU FUCK

STRICKLER DON'T YOU FUCKING DARE NOT YOU TOO THAT'S TOO FUCKING RUDE DON'T DO THIS TO ME

THERE'S NO WAY HE'S DEAD RIGHT WE SAW NO BODY

Barbara does not deserve this I refuse to accept it. He's fine he'll be back they wouldn't kill two Changelings at once. Also Nomura is with Draal now I take no criticism.

So my favorite characters were Bular, Draal, Gunmar and Angor. And before this movie I always half-joked that everyone I love dies, how I still like Strickler and Nomura but apart from them all of my faves were killed in the very order of favoritism. AND NOW LOOK AT THIS. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN I LOVE A CHARACTER. MY LOVE IS TOXIC.

OKAY I LOVE GUN RO- WAIT NO I DON'T LOVE HIM FUCK ABORT ABORT

It's great tho omg

I didn't realize it was Gun Robot when I saw it in the trailer this is amazing

Okay but imagine you're chilling in your trollmarket minding your own business when some misfit group of strangers waltzes in, steals your favorite shiny and celebrates your death before running off

"I AM GUN ROBOT" IS THE HORN LMAOOO

Nana better show up at some point to reunite with her boytoy, I'll cancel this entire franchise otherwise

Something bad is going to happen to Toby isn't it. He's getting too much screentime

Jim's hand got DEEP FRIED

ARCHIE NO

We can play Scrabble okay if they don't free them (which they must) I want an after credits scene of them playing scrabble

Douxie and Nari's bond 🥺🥺🥺

Nari pls just say what you fuckin mean the world is ending

Oh god is she going to remember killing Nomura oh nooo

Claire don't make the portal you will die again. Your hair gon be white all over

EVERYONE AVOIDING THE SCHOOL JUST RIGHT THERE LMAO RIP

I love how Darci is just with the school bus. Civilian girlfriend. But also love how the world is ending and Coach is like "fuck that I'm gonna teach these kids"

Does he know his son is pregnant

"Going back to the city where it's safe" buddy have you been to that city

Whatever happens, Nari has the coolest looking titan. Giant four legged gremlin. I'd adopt him.

WAIT SHE CAN FEEL THE PAIN?

Me: oh i love that titan

The titan 5 seconds later:

Did Nari just fucking die what the FUCK

Oh of COURSE the pages are stuck together RIGHT THERE

Seriously tho how do you not notice an entire nougat nummy in a book

Wait so Arcadia has another heartstone? Or OH SO IT'S ALIVE. OKAY GREAT. GUNMAR COULDN'T EVEN DO THAT RIGHT HUH

Love how the Heartstone has been dormant/dead for months and apparently heard Blinky say it's alive and decided to wake up RIGHT THEN

Finally they're evacuating the city. This is like, the third apocalypse there. About time.

Okay so you can't pull Excalibur from the rock, but you CAN carve out the stone. Couldn't you just carve it off the sword as close as possible and like. Use that? Just swing the whole damn rock around?

God i can NOT get over Steve's pants. I mean I read a spoiler he was gonna be pregnant but I thought it was a prank or shitpost. I did not see this coming and I am never going to be over it. I love how he and Aja just roll with it and nobody else even cares. They've seen weirder stuff. So he's pregnant now. Whatever.

Jim's hand is bandaged and his ribs still hurt. I love that they're actually consistent with his injuries. I mean sucks for him but hell yeah for hero that doesn't always win!

Okayyy here comes the heartstone. Why not!

IS HE IN LABOR

So if you kiss an Akiridion 7 times you will have 3-5 babies in a few hours. How are they not overpopulated?? Also Aja couldn't have WARNED STEVE BEFOREHAND?

Eli is so supportive omfg

So uh where are the babies gonna come out of? I'm not into mpreg how does this usually work

OH STEVE THANKS FOR ASKING MY QUESTION

Oh good thing he happens to have 8 friends still alive. Otherwise this would've never worked. Nomura had to die otherwise there would've been 10 of them.

Why is everyone bowing to Jim? Did they rehearse this?

Stuart if you hadn't taken a bathroom break you would've thrown off the math and doomed the world. That was a poop of fate my man

Ahhh the signature quote. Where did Douxie and the Akiridions learn it? Did they rehearse this too? It's really cliché but I do like it tbh

If Strickler were dead we'd see more Barbara right?

WOOO BLINKY DRIVING

Ah Jim just used she/her for Bellroc! Finally we're learning some pronouns. I've been wondering this whole time.

MY VIRGIN EYES. WHAT IS GOING O N

How are they not dying with all this lava?

She really just yeeted Varvatos

Did Claire just tell AAARRRGGHH to jump off the titan and he did it without question

I want to say I like Stuart and want him to have more screentime, but I won't say it because I don't want him to die

Jim's poor ribs

Toby can drive yoooo

Tobyyy you're scaring meeeee

So did they really need the different stone or was the amulet just waiting for Jim to choose death over giving up

I saw the armor before but it looks VERY COOL

Also I didn't mention this before but I love that they cut Merlin's name from the incantation. Good for them.

Toby you lost your helmet noooo

For real tho I'm terrified for Toby rn. I saw a comment somewhere earlier that just said "Toby no" with no context and I am AFRAID

So do Bellroc's eyes work after all? I thought she was blinded back in Wizards in the past.

DID SHE JUST FUCKING STAB MY BOY

TOBY YOU SHOULD NOT BE THERE GET OUT THE TRUCK

Bellroc maybe screaming "i'm powerless" in front of your enemy isn't the best idea

She sploosh

DID JIM SURVIVE THAT FALL AND ALSO IS THE TACO TRUCK OKAY

How is he lifting Claire like that buddy you have bruised ribs and just got stabbed

ELI HI CAN WE SEE THE KIDS

SEVEN KIDS! AND ELI JR I LOVE IT

This show really loves to give people more than the recommended amount of babies with no warning huh

She immediately knows which one is Eli Jr 🥺 okay listen I'm not the biggest fan of comic relief sideplot surprise babies, but I have to admit they're cute. Cute couple. Throuple. Eli is in on this. He even has a Junior.

I TOLD YOU WHERE'S THE DAMN TACO TRUCK NANA WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU AND NEITHER WILL I

Oh yea he better fuckin be alive I will commit murder

HE BETTER FUCKIN BE ALIVE BITCH

FUCK YOU

THAT'S A WHOLE ASS CHILD HE ISN'T ALLOWED TO DIE IT'S ILLEGAL

JIM IS GONNA LOOK DOWN AT THE GREEN GLOWING BITCH AAARRRGGHH CONVENIENTLY THREW THERE AND SEE HIM ALIVE OR SOMETHING

YEAH USE THE SWORD TO UNDEAD HIM! THAT'S HOW YOU USE SWORDS!

Unbecoming Part 2

So is Jim just gonna Groundhog Day it until everyone is fine? There's only 13 minutes left we're gonna need a bigger movie

Also I screamed so much about everyone's death and now everyone reading this after they already saw the whole thing is gonna shame me for clowning huh

The scene where Blinky is giving his goodbye speech, there are no babies and Steve has a round belly? Did he reabsorb them?? I mean I know Jim is about to un-birth them but he hasn't started yet

JUST HOW FAR BACK IS HE PLANNING TO GO

WAIT HOLD UP EXCUSE ME WHAT

Oh they did NOT just do that. I though he was just gonna go back to like, the start of the movie maybe. Not all the way

Imagine being in your early twenties with as much trauma as this kid has and having to pretend you're 16 again

Somewhere Unkar is complaining because "oh sure NOW it's a good idea"

I know Jim is wondering where Toby is because he was there before. But before, he made an entire meatloaf AND did his homework before leaving the house, so honey maybe wait a minute

For a second I thought Toby wasn't gonna be there and Jim would return to the right time. But there he is!

Alright so they're in school now, did they take the canal and just didn't mention the amulet on screen or did they pass it as if the Unbecoming episode hadn't been that traumatizing? Jim you know what happens when you ignore it

Jim maybe you're being too obvious here lmao

Soooo. Anyway. These whole past years I've rewatched this show over and over and over again are cancelled now?

OKAY AT LEAST WE SAW NANA FOR A SPLIT SECOND THAT'S IRONIC TIMING

So we get the quote again. And Trollhunter Tobias is nice. Cool. Cool AU I mean, but I don't know. I don't knowwww. I've been way too invested in everything to just accept that it never happened?? So uh. Hm. How about this.

Strickler survived because fuck you, and Toby also survived and just has scars now. Maybe a wheelchair but he's fine, also he can use the Warhammer for super speed and make it awesome once he's used to it. Archie and Charlie get freed once they rebuild the bridge (and they were playing scrabble to pass the time). Nomura is still dead because she died on screen and I can't really deny that but she's with Draal so it's okay. Everyone is traumatized but they'll be fine. NotEnrique is still babysitting 500 babies and Steve is about to bring 7 more.

In summary, I reject Groundhog Day ending but everything else was great, as long as it actually happened. It was a good movie. But you can't just cancel years of passion. Having the prospect of a million "canon AUs" sounds great for writing but at the same time nooo you can't do that he didn't have to go back THAT far HHHHH

I liked the movie. It was a great watch and a satisfying end to a franchise, but I gotta say I do not fancy the ending of it so I will from now on be in denial. I honestly feel kind of betrayed that this show was my whole life for so long, I learned every smallest fact, and they basically deleted it from existence. I know what they were going for, I think, but no thank you I will be going with my own opinion. Still gonna rewatch it a few dozen times though ✌🏻

And that concludes my live commentary that was supposed to be a small handful of notes. Feel free to shame me for my opinions. See ya!

[bluewormonastring]

My live reactions to season 2 (episode 5)

SPOILERS OBVIOUSLY KIDS READ AT YOUR OWN RISK

Kinda mad because I already typed out commentary for the first 10 mins before accidentally deleting it but nevertheless we persevere

I’ve missed them being goofy so fucking much this makes me so happy

HES WEARING A BELL PHAHAHAHA

Lucius is abt to go tf off

ED IS TRYING HIS BEST JIM BE RESPECTFUL SMH

LUCIUS I LOVE YOU LMFAOOO

Lu looks like a lesbian going to a rodeo w those bell bottoms

Not a single person believes buttons is a bird

OMG OLU IS WITH JIM AND ARCHIE OMG YAY I LOVE JIM AND ARCHIE DONT GET ME WRONG BUT I WAS SO SAD THAT WE WERENT GETTING MORE OLU TIME

Lucius ur insane again xX

But he’s so fr with the words I’m sorry never being said and “the bar is on the floor”

OH MY FUCKING GOD IZZY AND LUCIUS ARE TALKING LIKE THEYRE MAKING EYE CONTACT COEXISTING OH MY GOD (now kiss)

Daily reminder that I adore Izzy hands

FUCK OFF THEYVE SWITCHED IZZYS BOLD NOW HE TOOK THE JOINT OR WTV AND WENT TO PUT IT BACK IN LUS MOUTH AND HE HIT IT AWAY

Crying they put motherfucking Blackbeard on probation

Living for stede practicing captaining

He’s so proud of the door lmfao

“Oh hey friend” “AHH FUCK YOU”

YES FINALLY WE GOT THE LUCIUS AND ED CONFRONTATION

“There is nothing you could do that could fix this” “I will let you push me off the ship” “actually-“ LMFAOOO

Izzy ur so talented I love you

“Yeah Blackbeard says a lot of things… but what did he say about me… sss…specifically” Izzy I love you ur perfect

Oh stede you’re trying

LUCIUS REENACTING THE FUCKING PUSHING HIM OFF LMAO

OH MY FUCKIN GOD LMFAO “FUCKIN EAT MY SHIT BLACKBEARD HOW DOES THAT FEEL BITCH” PHAHAHAHAH

I don’t think you actually feel better my friend

Whatcha doin fang

“I’m gonna catch some fishies” I LOVE YOU FANG

AWWW YAY IM SO GLAD FANG IS HAPPY AGAIN HE IS MY SON

Izzy respectfully what are u carving this whole episode

I fuckin knew there was gonna be some demon symbol shit this episode

JIM DIPPING LMFAO

Stede respectfully stay the fuck away from that vest

OH MY GOD THATS WHY HE SAYS I DID A PUNCH LMAO

Also I thought that dude was Lucius at first

“Playing las maracas with the devil” *spits*

HES SO GIRLY POP IN THAT OUTFIT

Living for Izzy and stede just causally spending time together (but don’t fuck sorry kids I am not a stizzyhands girlie)

OH MY GOD ITS PETE AND LUCIUS

NOT EDS FACE BEING ON EVERYTHING LMAO

Lucius trauma is not a competition dont act confused when Pete gets upset

AWWWW JIM KEEPING THEIR PEOPLE SAFE

I would believe it if samba invented peanut butter tbh

Ohhhhhh is frenchie allergic to peanuts and also how has he not discovered this yet

I adore how David Fane says dick

AWWW ED REALIZING THAT HE WAS GENUINELY SCARING PEOPLE

See Ed that’s how you say “I’m sorry”

SCREAMING LUCIUS AND IZZY ARE TALKING AGAIN LOOK AT THEM THEYRE SO CUTE

Izzy are u genuinely trying to convince yourself it was a shark denial doesn’t count as moving forward my boy

NOW KISS HEHEHEHE

“I actually love this” ASWW BABY

“THEY RIPPED MY POCKET THE FUCKIN BARBARIANS”

“OHHHH FUCK OFFFFF” “rude”

Living for fang and Ed’s therapy sesh

Fang is normal people dealing with my adhd ass (Ed)

The way he lured them all out lmao

Stede just say it’s real my boy

SCREAMING AT IZZYS 👌😏 AFTER STEDE SHOOTS THE GUN

Lucius better hella redeem himself rn

I would not say that’s Pete but okay

WHY IS HE GETTING ON HIS KNEES HELLO!??

OH MY GOD

LUCIUS

OH MY GOD

NO FUCKING WAY

LUCIUS HOLY SHIT

OH MY GOD MATELOTAGE

IM SO HAPPY FOR MY BABIES

ED SHOWING OFF HIS FISH HES SO PROUD OG MY BABY

AND THE YOU WEAR FINE THINGS WELL CALLBACK OH MY GOD THIS IS PERFECTION

OH MY GOD ARE THEY GONNA KISS

FUCK OFF THEYRE FUCKING KISSING OMG

YAAAAAAAY

WEVE WAITED SO LONG

Oh shit that was like a kiss kiss

Awwww “let’s take it slow”

CUTIESSSSSSSS

IM SO HAPPY RN

AH HOLDING HANDS

CUTIES PART 2

THIS? PERFECT SOMEONE SEDATE ME

FANGS REAL NAME IS KEVIN OMFG

Guys this was literally the most perfect episode I’ve ever seen I’m genuinely so happy couldn’t have been better definitely my new favorite episode

And with that I’ll see u kids next week bye bye now

My live reactions to season 2 (episode 1)

SPOILERS OBVIOUSLY KIDS READ AT UR OWN RISK

Holy shit I’m so excited

Oh my god

Oh my god

Oauxbwkxjwhz

LOVE THE BLACK SCREEN W A SHARP CUT TO THE BEACH 10/10

OMG WE GET THE STEDE AND IZZY BEACH SWORD NOW? SO SOON? YOU SPOIL ME OFMD

Omg he’s been stabbed this is for sure a dream sequence

STEDE THATS MURDER EVEN IF ITS JUST IN YOUR HEAD

“You absolute twa….” BEST DYING WORDS EVER ILY IZZY ALWAYS AND FOREVER

THE SLOW RUN TOWARDS EACH OTHER OMG

AND STEDES FACE AND HIS VOICE AND AWW BABY

AWWW THE WAY THEY CRASHED INTO EACH OTHER

“BABE” HA FOWIHXBWNA I WAS NOT PREPARED

“I KNEW YOUD FIND ME LOVE”

“Fuckin love the beard mate”

Oh we’ve started farting lovely

OH MY GOD I WASNT PREPARED FOR HOW ID FEEL WHEN IT CUT TO HIM WITH EVERYONE AWW MY BABIES IVE MISSED YOU SO MUCH

“Cant be worse than you moaning ‘Ed oh ed’ all night�� ILY PETE

Iconic title screen as always

“DEAR ED” AHHHH

SPANISH JACKIE ILY

Instantly taking an interest in the Swede as we knew would happen but still iconic

Ugh I love Leslie jones did I mention I love Leslie jones

Nat looks so scared aww baby

I love wee John being security

And host stede aww baby

I live for black Pete dealing with working in customer service

And all of them tbh

Aww poor buttons he needs his ocean and Livy

I’m ngl for a second I was like “where’s Fred armisen- oh wait”

ITS THE I THINK OF YOU OFTEN LINE YESS

HELLO YES I ADORE IZZY HANDS HE CAN DO NO WRONG IDC WHAT YOU SAY IVE MISSED MY BABY BOY

Ahh the wedding

“Demon? *shakes head* I’m the fucking devil” AHH

Guys were only 6 minutes in and this post is already long as shit so buckle up (if ur actually reading it lmao my ass would be like nope too long”

THERES MY VICO HELLO VICO ILY AND MY JOEL FRY ILY BABIES

Ah yes ye olde put trauma in a box in lock it

Awww fang baby boy someone give him a hug find him Lucius

Omg it’s the “you dumped him” scene

“Did everyone get some cake” because he’s still our precious little angle

HE JUST SNORTED RHINO HORN IS THAT A THING WAS THAT A THING IN HISTORY HUH

NO ITS THIS SCENE I DONT WANNA WATCH MY BABY BE SAD

Yes hello I love Izzy hands I would protect him with my life little baby boy

Vico looks so done w his ass

Someone give my baby a hug

Ily fang

The tears in his eyes during “unhand me” aww Angel

AWW IZZY

CONNOTHAN O NONNATHAN WE LOVE YOU YOU PRECIOUS LITTLE BOY UR ABSOLUTE PERFECTION YOU ANGEL

I love the friendship Jim and that girl have

Oh shit Jackie

“BOO CAKES” JACKIE

Stede honey you’re not intimidating

“I know that guy we had breakfast together” “you’ll be having a lot of breakfastes together” “oh okay 🙂” ily Swede

HIM DOING AN ED IMPRESSION LMAO “could be. Could be mate.”

“You’re my hero” 😞😕🙂😏

Swede bein a cute lil double agent

AWW SWEDE “my time with Jackie has been the happiest of my life. Her love has helped me locate parts of myself I didn’t even know existed and reclaim others that I have long missed” ILY

“Tonight is my turn to perform the husbandly duties”

“That’s another toe” ED YOU STAY AWAY FROM HIM LEAVE MY BABY ALONE

“Who am I to you” aww Izzy Angel baby he’s accepting it OMG “I have love for you Edward” IZZY YOURE SAYING IT OUT LOUD IM SO PROUD OF YOU BUD

IZZY YOU DID NOT JUST SAY TALK IT THROUGH YOU HAD TO HAVE KNOWN THAT WAS A HORRIBLE IDEA

OMG AND THE SHIFT IN THE MUSIC AS SOON AS HE SAID IT

IZZY RUN

RUN MY BABY BOY RUN

“As a crew” OH EDDDDD

ED DONT POINT A GUN AT JIM

OR ANYONE ELSE

THAT INCLUDES YOURSELF EDWARD TEACH BORN ON A BEACH

“They think ya crazy” cackling his face omg

Go taika absolutely slaying this scene

The way the camera is all like jittery is so good

Jim’s like “beard” makes their chin look like… not caved in but idk like it looks like they have a rly bad overbite yk

“Everyone knows why” “I don’t. Enlighten me” “your feelings for stede fucking bon-“ *GUNSHOT* ARE U SHITTING ME EDWARD NO WE DO BOT SHOOT FRIENDS

OH MY GOD HE MADE FRENCHIE FIRST MATE HOLY SHIT

Oh my god Izzy my poor baby Izzy oh my god how dare you hurt my Izzy

LMAO SWEDE

“FUCK THOSE HAMMIES UP” LMAO

There’s like no way there’s actually anything valuable in that chest

WE GOT TO SEE HER TAKE A NOSE FOR THE NOSE JAR YESSS

OH SHIT INDIGO

“Now give me back my blue shit STEVE”

Susan’s hot

DONT HURT SWEDE

Oh good okay we’re cool

I feel like she’s lying tho

But for now we’re cool

AWW FANG

AWW JIM COMFORTING FANG

“WANNA HEAR THE STORY OF THE WOODEN BOY” AWW

Living for vico using they them for the puppet

“DO THE VOICE” AWW

OMG VICO THATS ICONIC

AWW YAY THEYRE LAUGHING NOW THOSE ARE MY BABIES YAY

Living for buttons reuniting with the ocean

Okay roll credits cheers yall see you next episode