#tbh I didn't even try lol
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Time tried riding with Wild on the Master Cycle once.
Never again.
#he's dead Jim#Wild drives like a maniac#but you already knew that#no I can't draw vehicles#tbh I didn't even try lol#house of heroes#hoh time#legend of zelda au#hoh wild#hoh#hoh official art#zelda au#legend of zelda#the legend of zelda#link#nintendo#master cycle zero#doodle#sketches#houseofheroesau#oot link#botw link#not lu
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loveeee your Oswald so so so much. Can we see the boy?
perceive the
#oswald cobblepot#gotham#curryart#i like to not draw his hair one consistent way but i was#weirdly a fan of that weird swoop with his fringe i think about it all the time#I think I made his neck too skinny tbh (or maybe it's just that his head is rly big lol)#maybe his arms too but different people distribute weight differently + his left arm is supposed to be leaning on the back of a couch#which i didn't draw. but#i did try to make his chin a little softer but i don't think it came across well even w the red the rest of the lines are
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was trying to figure out why I feel so Wrong rn and I think it's because I didn't follow my usual daily routine like At All and now my brain is freaking out. woke up at a vastly different time, had entirely different tasks throughout the day, took a nap at a weird time (to make up for the fact I had about 3 hours of sleep last night), zero human contact for the past 15 hours, and ate different food from usual (various leftovers from social events/thanksgiving, instead of cooking for myself like normal). and before I really realized that these were all things that were Bad For My Brain I was just wandering around my house like "why do I feel like garbage?? I've literally been outside so much today my brain should be happy"
ANYWAY here's to me not remembering I have issues with unstructured living because my days have been so similar for the past 4ish years that I straight up Forgot that things being too different too fast makes me crazy ✌️
#rye.txt#I'll be fine lol#the sudden shift in my daily schedule and my generally unhealthy eating today were the big things that made me feel Bad#so now that I am actually cognizant of this I can take steps to mitigate it tomorrow#god. what the hell did I even eat#leftover soup. that was breakfast (very out of my ordinary). uhh. a lot of pie (grandma made a ton for thanksgiving).#a tangerine that miiight have been on the edge of going bad#(thought I should eat a fruit. fruit did not improve status)#reheated popcorn chicken? that was not a good decision I felt so gross after eating that#hrm. ok my issue is that I feel like I Need To Eat These Leftovers So They Don't Go Bad#otherwise i'll be Wasting Perfectly Good Food#BUT. I don't want to eat it and eating it makes me feel generally unfulfilled and kinda blehg#ough. why can't I be normallllll#I'm also not dealing with the whole 'zero human contact' very well tbh. which is weird because I'm a deeply introverted person#and usually spend my days avoiding people like the plague#but idk. it's been literal years since I've spent and extended period of time completely alone#I don't knowwww i don't know#I'm gonna invite some friends over tomorrow and get them to help me eat these dang pies#ALSO. ITS BEEN REALLY COLD TODAY. AND I HAD TO BREAK INTO MY NEIGHBORS' HOUSE#(was not breaking in; I was trying to take care of their dogs since they're out of town)#(but their door code AND their garage door code weren't working#and I didn't have a physical key to use#so I had to push my way in through a back door that'd been blocked by a pile of boxes taller than my head#and squirm into their garage in order to get inside and take care of the dogs)#(was a very stressful way to spend my early waking hours)#i ALSO had to drive to the AIRPORT this morning which SUCKED. had to drop off family#which like I'm happy to help but also airports suck so much ass I hate them#anyway. today was sort of shitty#but mostly I only have myself to blame#did not structure my day well enough
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having fun with colors for once :P
thanks @creepycoffins for the awesome dtiys :D
#creepycoffinsdtiys#trigun#millions knives#vash the stampede#i haven't drawn nearly enough knives. posted him even less#him and vash are so fun to draw :P ik they have the same face but it's like. fun to experiment with how different i can make them look yk#also admittedly. did most of this at work during downtime so if it looks funky..... my bad#the lighting isn't the greatest aight?? it's night shift and there's no windows but they do dim the lights#i did do the limited coloring i did at home lol. wasnt gon bring more art supplies to work#trying to get back into the swing of things with my drawing. i got myself a huion display for my birthday this year!#on top of my traditional i wanna do more animated stuff#primarily animated bc honestly i don't really wanna learn digital painting or whatever. im not interested in that and i like my harsh style#i'd also like to do more original work. i think last year was literally just trigun fanart lmfaoo#we'll see how things turn out ig#i'm not really holding myself to doing anything bc i don't see that turning out well. i am applying myself to more fan projects at the leas#tho those i'm applying more as a writer lmfao#well anyway. enough about me. i actually really like the drawing this was based off of! i didn't include the full body designs#and tbh vash's design is almost entirely cut out just cuz how the pose worked out :(#so i would highly suggest checking out the original art by the person i tagged!#and their other art's pretty banging as well :D
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Finally got around to watching ep 11 (´;ω;`)
#I'm late...#I'm sorry I wasn't able to watch the episode by time last week but again. Food poisoning. And then the new chapter came out#I feel like I had much more to say when I started watching it last week...#Mmmmhh. I really like when bsd animation uses the colored lineart effect for flashbacks / subspaces (Anne's Room‚ Poe's books).#I think it's one of the prettiest and most original things of the bsd animation.#I've always felt like the Natsume reveal was a bit coming out of nowhere lol.#Here's this legendary ability user everyone knows but no one has ever seen with this immensely unthinkable powerful ability...#That the reader literally wasn't ever made aware of in the previous 49 chapters lol#After all that build up‚ his ability even feels a little underwhelming.#Which I suppose was the intended result‚ but I'm not sure it really works all that well in the end.#Then Naomi's words “Come to think of it‚ the things that happen when Mii-chan vanishes [...]‚ disasters are stopped every time”#really feel soooo out of place when so-called Mii-chan was never before mentioned up to this episode (╥﹏╥)#But I'll stop complaining. It's nothing big really#Fukuzawa and Mori's relationship is very homoerotic. Tbh#I looooove the ss/kk I don't even have much to say just watching scenes of them interacting together fills my heart of a warm feeling :')#The animation quality is very poor and the drawings are very undetailed but really I love ss/kk too much to care.#A lot of emphasis is put by the fandom on Atsushi's cruel remark towards Akutagawa in this ch/ep and it *is* cruel but really...#Akutagawa had literally just attacked Atsushi in a death-threatening way‚ futilely and completely unprompted#I can't find it in myself to blame Atsushi if he was irritated and lashed out at him.#And all their other moments are just so cute. What do you mean Akutagawa is deeply interested in understanding Atsushi's motivations.#What do you mean Atsushi can't get Akutagawa out of his mind!!!! They're so cute#So many more cute moments were cut out too rip lawnmower line you'll always be missed rip date line you'll always be missed#I feel like Pushkin's character is another instance of‚‚‚ Wow me and the author's morals really don't align at all#I really don't like the narrative of “weaker people will constantly try to harm and take advantage of strongest ones”#random rambles#Fun fact when I watched this episode for the first time I asked my mother to join me. Because I know a ss/kk scene was coming and I really–#didn't want to watch it alone. Well as it turned out the whole first half of the episode was dedicated to old man fighting–#and she gave up after that 😂😂 But I'm still grateful to her for trying.
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imagine joys dad (whats his name??) and mr sweet having a little group chat like "whats the worst way we can treat our children?? ideas?"
#house of anubis#tbh jeromes dad did try make things better at least#and i guess mr sweet tried but im still mad at him#yk wasnt ambers dad like so disappointed in her whenever she wanted to follow her dream#and mick had some issues with his dad too remembering the whole australia thing#house of anubis should be called house of daddy issues#honourable mentions to victor rodenmaar sr who treated his son awfully his whole life and didn't even apologise directly afterwards#he literally sent nina with his watch like 'tell him im sorry lol'#also rip sarah because her dad was literally frobitcher smythe himself#they all have daddy issues#im cackling imagining joy being like to nina 'u should be glad ur father is dead'#ill stop now#just thoughts
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Lol I keep on doing this, saying I'd come back to tumblr to only disappear again 😂😭
#and i hate it bc i miss being on here#but also i don't have to force myself or feel guilty for it#bc if i'm fr being on social media is just so time consuming and also not what is good for my mental health often#and that includes tumblr#it's not even that it's a toxic place (at least not the content i'm consuming) but sometimes i just rather spend my time with people irl#meeting someone than on social media and like focus on my life#the last month or so was just really difficult for me and i haven't been feeling so bad mentally in forever#i mean it always is like that that time of the year but i feel like i was worse this year#whenever autumn comes around with the darkness and cold i seem to hit a low mentally#when i tell you how much better my mood is in summer spring how much better i feel everyday regardless of everything else#i get people like autumn but for me its literally the worst and winter too altough at some point it gets better#maybe i adapt and maybe because i spend more time outside around christmas when i go home that's usually a turning point#and ig also the lights of december make it a bit better#but mid october to november is awful#this year the weather was much worse beginning of october was much worse#i feel like i lowkey have this seasonal mood disorder idk#but i barely managed to go to classes and i had no motivation#usually i always make myself study and do the things i have to atleast altough i often terribly procrastinate#but now i was barely able to do this and i had things to do but i couldn't make myself i missed a deadline closely#luckily my professors are the best but i felt so horrible for it how i was unable to get it done#sunlight is just so good for my mood and ik how doctors say how you should avoid it because you can get skincancer#but like i'd rather than my mental health being this bad (not that i want either)#i already miss summer so much and being happier#but tbh i haven't felt this good as I do today in weeks and even this whole week was better#i exercised more than usual altough i tried to in the last weeks i couldn't as often as i normally do so maybe this actually helps a lot#and i studied yesterday today and i will tomorrow i finally feel motivation again#besides i also tried to break up with my bf so that was also tough but i couldn't lol#i tried talking to him and tell him in the nicest way but he didn't get what i was trying to do and i couldn't say more bc i felt horrible#but maybe that's for the better altough i had these thoughts for a while that he just isn't the one for me and that we're too different...#i do really like him as a person the way he treats me and i'm still into him but i just felt like it wouldn't work
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really loving wuwa so far, it still lags a bit here and there but it kinda feels like it just has to marinate for a while? first 10 minutes are painful but after it seems like it has its assets cached or something and it isn't as much a problem anymore. it also looks like kuro games has been working overtime putting in patch fixes asfdjlkadfsj god speed to the devs fr
#0.txt#i'm all about combat gameplay and exploration so i'm having LOADS of fun on that front#i don't really have any opinions on the story yet tbh. its not bad but it's not amazing but i never have high expectations for#early game story to begin with. or gacha games in general tbh ajkladsf#i DO really like the world building in the sense of everything being made up of frequencies. it helps tie a lot of the lore together imo#my only thing is like. honestly if i didn't know who the fuck i was or where the fuck i was why would i go on this puzzle hunt for#some magistrate who i haven't even met in person. but whatever ig lol#character wise i'm running sanhua / yangyang / mortefi#sanhua is the fave here i love the charged attack mechanic where you have to release at the right moment#yangyang's cc is really useful and mortefi is also just fun lol#from trials i REALLY like using jiyan and lingyang so i hope i pull them eventually. still need to try out others though too#in general i definitely prefer the melee characters waaay more than others. i haven't liked a single rectifier yet ajskdlaf#(i got encore off the beginner banner)#my only gripe with the combat is that the range definitely feels a bit small like if you're a little too far away you won't hit the enemy#i'm eager to actually figure out proper playstyles though. i do actually like that effectively just button mashing also works#but it's also super satisfying understanding a character's exact gameplay mechanics#i have not even looked at character building though that is a whatever until it suddenly clicks fadkflaf
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I had a dream I was following my work crush's Goodreads account. I didn't FIND it in the dream—I was already following it. A fascinating concept because I probably follow less than 10 accounts on Goodreads so I remember following every one of them, and he had his full ass name on there for some reason. And he was showing up on my feed because he has been very active going through lists of interesting lists I would frankly not expect the average young white man from New Hampshire to be reading, and marking things "want to read"
#idk what this dream says but it feels like somehow a consequence of when i found his linkedin by accident#i was just trying to see if he had a staff photo (he doesn't) but i suppose if u search someone's name + place of work. u get linkedin#i think so little about linkedin that that honestly didn't occur to me. i will never seek out anyone's linkedin intentionally. i prommy#i will do my damnedest to forget about the existence of linkedin#not of goodreads though. i really do just like reading and leaving reviews tbh#tales from diana#the books he was marking as want to read were like. queer feminist books on sexuality#fiction by indigenous queer authors#stuff *i* don't even rly read but ppl i follow read and review sometimes#high expectation of again. a young white man from new hampshire. i hate to say it but that's what he is#i like how i know literally nothing about his hobbies let alone worldview so my brain was like. yeah no he's woke#it's funny bc whenever i don't specifically meet someone in like a queer-affirming space or whatever#and it's a cis man im like ooooh what if he's like transphobic and racist for all i know. bc that happens irl!!#and obviously knowing nothing about him but how pretty he is. i am very much holding back the urge to idealize#tempering it down with the reasoning of 'well he could be awful and i wouldnt know'#my dream was like 'no. not only does he Get it. but he's Well Read about it'#i do not say this lightly: lol.
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Sometimes i hate to be the one who's always right
#i suspect that my ex bestfriend like the one i've been friends with for over a decade is now dating that one guy friend#who i was really into years ago when we were all from the same group of friends#and the point is that i ALWAYS had that gut feeling she was also into him but due to the fact that she was always dating someone else#she never really gave him a chance#and she knew i had some feelings for him at the time (she never tried to help us get closer btw which i took that as a subtle sign lol)#<- i mean thats what friends do right? especially really close ones#and one time she almost tried to start a make out sesh with him knowing i was there to witness it happening#she then brushed it all off saying she was drunk and blah blah blah#fucking bitch#i should've fucking ended it that day tbh#why am i mad about it now? i don't know#i just hate the idea that she could've started dating him earlier instead of supporting me trying to get close to him or whatever#possibly behind my back for a bit even#and me being so right about it since the very fucking beginning#if y'all ever catch me posting about how much i miss that person you're allowed to come to my house and beat the shit out of me#cause i don't and i didn't deserve this#end of rant
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[just venting a bit into the void you understand you understand 😌] Lately I've been feeling very caught between "I have a lot of thoughts on Sparrow and Normal and all that with the ending and teen talk and feel like I need to get them out and voice them for my own piece of mind and resolution" and "I am lacking the strength and energy to actually sit down and write it all out and kind of really just want to fully move on to other things (AUs, fics, anything else)" but my brain can't seem to commit to either and that's quite frustrating cause it's just left me very restless. *Sigh*. Idk! Just needed to complain about that a bit ig, it's silly but this is what has been ailing me as of late.
#Then there's also a part of me that's like “does anyone even care at this point? haven't I already talked about them too much?”#but I have seen many a take that irk me...#and perhaps at the center of it all nagging at me is that persistent conflation of love and pride#Less about that in Normal's mind so much as in Will's and the fandom's 🤔#Also that reoccurring issue of the fandom going ''Normal thinks this therefore it is The Truth'' though I believe I've discussed this befor#And... Hooks Will could have grabbed onto but didn't... Quite a few of those...#And the double standard/negativity bias in fandom of ignoring that Sparrow says both that he loves and likes Normal while doodlerized#But not treating those with the same legitimacy we do the pride thing. And ignoring Sparrow's demonstrations of love and change...#And what the love wolf scene actually implies about Sparrow (as I see it) with his own explanation of the pride thing in mind#But also!!! Also on Norm's epilogue and how despite everything taken at face value (i.e. no teen talk influence) I don't actually hate it#and I think it's plenty salvageable#And gah also that like *regardless* of how things turn out with Normal and his dad-#Well I haven't listened to much of the teen talk just the directly Sparrow-relevant clips#so I don't know quite how cynical Will is or isn't about Normal's future#But like. UGH. What I'm trying to say is even if things didn't find resolution vis-a-vis his dad#(which tbh I could go either way on- it's the meta misinterpretations of Sparrow that Bother me not so much Normal's)#(Well that's complicated. Again it comes back to the love vs. pride thing gosh this is so vague of me lol)#With all the positive influences in his life (and just the fact that life is long? and therapy is a thing?) I just don't see Normal-#being Miserable for the rest of his life. Like. I mean I won't elaborate here really but damn it no he can absolutely turn out alright stil#blugh#BUT YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN THAT'S A LOT OF STUFF AND THAT'S ONLY VAGUE RAMBLINGS ABOUT *SOME* OF IT#Like I'm proud of a lot of my essay posts (which I'm hoping to eventually compile in a masterpost eventually actually) but they take a whil#And if my heart wants to do other things... Ah idk...#ANYWAYS a vent to vent a vent to vent
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ouaaaaaghhh i've been on a bit of a pokemon binge lately......... i should crack open my old pokemon games and take a peek at my teams :,) i wish i still had my old copy of conquest and black 2 though............ :(
#gu6chan's musings#im so sad because literally ALL my pokemon games i've had as a teen i still have#up to sun and moon which i got on christmas when i was NINETEEN lmao!!!#but yeah pokemon was technically my first fandom ig???? i used to watch my brother play pokemon yellow and crystal a lot when i was TINY#but i never ACTUALLY played pokemon or video games in general myself until my older sister surprised me with my first video game console#and video game when she came up from florida 😭 a black dsi with pokemon black; i was 13 and my dad HATED her for it like 'Why are you#giving her videogames??? she's a girl :/' BUT I HAD IT!!!! MY FIRST EVER POKEMON GAME THAT BELONGED TO MEEEEE#i loved the SHIT out of that game and then got black 2; soulsilver and platinum; pokemon conquest; got the 3ds games...#i still have platinum/soulsilver as well as all the mainline 3ds games i believe#but conquest; black; and black 2 i lost :( literally my FAVOURITES i took them everywhere with me (which is why i lost them lmao)#funny enough i know exactly where black 2 IS though; its in the pocket of a jacket i owned but lost back between 2013-2014???#if i find the jacket it will 100% be in there; i just couldn't find the jacket and tbh idek if its still around anymore or is in storage#but if it is!!!! i'll literally cry lmao#black 2 is where i got my first level 100 pokemon; a magneton....... i ADORED that little bastard ouaaaghh....#i dont believe i ever managed to get past the league in black 2 though bc i remember being so pissed i couldnt get to see the other side of#the map beyond castelia city lmao#14-15 years old and i STILL didn't believe in stat moves 😭 i deserved to get shot#But fun fact: I DID get a new copy of Black a few years back!!! only it 1. already had save data on it and 2. it was full of rare/hacked#legendaries young me could only ever DREAM of having so i can't get myself to restart the save data even though i rlly want to.......#oh but funny enough!!! i also still have the 14 y/o dsi i was gifted back then; it still works though the battery cover is missing so you#have to hold it lol#but aaaaa so many fond memories of playing black and black 2... black 2 especially since i never really got to finish it lol#like#i finished the main CAMPAIGN with plasma and ghetsis trying to fucking kill you and all that (Something which i remember being so :0!!!?!?!#when i first saw it omgggg its such a clear memory aaaa) but i think like#i got up to the league and could never beat it........ so i just went back to training my mons till i got a level 100 magneton lmao#so many good memories; i hope i can get copies of black 2 and conquest again someday...
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so solace and corentin are siblings? were they separated? if one is with wyll who is the other with?
They are! Solace barely survived Corentin attacking the family when their dark urge awakened, and was taken in by the Temple of the Open Hand because their mother had been going there regularly and the priests had been helping Tin try to keep things under control. Solace was 10, Tin was 15, and they had a 13 year old sister who didn't make it.
Corentin doesn't remember the attack because of a mixture of trauma and purposeful efforts by the Bhaalists, and I don't think they ever truly get the memories of their family back. They put the prices together eventually, though. Solace remembers the attack vividly and was conscious enough to see the direct aftermath when Corentin came to. They're actually the reason she survived: Tin threw one of the many healing potions placed around their house at her and screamed out the window for help before the Butler dragged them away. It's...complicated for Solace and I don't think he'd ever be able to forgive them (which Corentin never expected or asked for), but eventually they're able to move around each other to some degree. They're also working on elf time so by the time they settle into that pattern and make their peace very few people who saw the very beginning of all of that post-game are alive, so the way they interact around each other instead of directly is kinda just accepted as the Way Things Are among the folks in the city who notice.
I haven't decided who Solace is gonna go for yet. I was thinking about Gale but I'm not sure; they might be a no-romance run, honestly. I've got active playthroughs for all of the romances but Gale and Minthara at the moment. Wyll would actually be a good fit for them I think, but I'm not sure if the "both siblings survive" timeline will be the canon one in my head since durge dies if you're not playing as them, and the idea of Solace finding Tin's body after fighting Orin is intriguing to me. I'm not going to touch their playthrough much until I've finished Corentin's and/or gotten further in Candor and Luka's first though, so I have time to decide lol
#their mother had grown up in a different bhaalist...compound? commune? enclave? than the one we see in-game#and fled to baldur's gate without knowing there was a temple there too. tbh i think part of the reason she picked that city#was b/c of gorion's ward#she didn't know she was pregnant with tin at the time but figured out what they were pretty quickly after they were born#solace was terrified of thunder & lightning for years after the attack (tin's a storm sorcerer)#but kinda just naturally/accidentally? became a tempest cleric#because they were processing everything & training to be a cleric at the same time#it also took them several years to truly feel comfortable at the temple#the moment they truly settled into the tempest domain marks that shift#they'd been trained w/ the intention of becoming a life domain cleric but it just. wasnt clicking#because that's just not how they interact with their god or faith#personality *or* experience-wise#they've always been restless and loud and trying to tamp that down (it didn't seem close to anyone's vibe but father lorgan's in-g#*game) just didn't work#even roses have thorns after all#anyway. ramble done lol#thank you for the ask!!#bg3#asks#solace riadyr#corentin#the prodigal saer#bg3 tav#bg3 durge#(solace uses he/she/they)#tin settled into an 'older sibling' role with orin pretty quickly#and solace was a little shit (affectionate) to the others in the temple in the way youngest siblings tend to be#the more things change the more they stay the same lol
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I want to ask my friends very deep and substantial questions because all of my friendships feel so superficial (on my end specifically) right now and I want them to be deeper.
#air's antics#I'll make a list LMAO#I want to know people#I want that kind of platonic intimacy#because bonding over fandoms that die is one thing#but knowing someone and maintaining that bond past mutual interests is another#I had mentioned to my therapist at one point that I didn't want my parents to know me#And I think that has extended to my friendships now#Like do my friends know ME or do they know a shell?#Like do you actually know my favorite color or is it my favorite color because people expect it to be?#You know?#Shit like that LOL#don't even get me started on how distrusting I have become#I don't even trust my therapist#LIke bro?????????????????????????????????????????????????#can you CHILL Air can you open up to someone eventually??#😂😂#I'm so sorry if any of you have tried to or want to get closer to me#I am currently making that impossible :' )#But please know that I AM trying.#I'm pretty resilient though like it's a miracle I still laugh#Despite the numerous times I am told that my laugh is too loud and hurts my mom's ears lmao#I think she just hates my laugh tbh#And I kinda do too but well it's the way I laugh //shrugs
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ik i already did smn like this before but im doing it again!!
(template below cut!)
#shock a fallout game isn't the fav game of all time for someone who runs a fallout blog lmfao#you're all so lucky you didn't get to see my cyberpunk 2077 era on main#i was fucking insufferable lmfao#first playthrough i was like#oh this is okay!#then the second one with phantom liberty absolutely fucking wrecked me#phantom liberty is a phenominal dlc#made me love the game and V even MORE then i already did lol#its really smn that you can come to love a world that just fucking hates you#V my beloved one of my fav protagonists of all time#still need to do a run with fem V#god im gushing again lmfao#i could speak the moon and stars of that game i stg#i was torn for the tons of hours section between fo4 and project zomboid!#both games I've got thousands of hours in!#but i think fallout 4 just beats it out#oh yeah i love the DA2 artstyle I'll die on that hill#can't get into the witcher no matter how hard I try#maybe I'll give it another go when the remake for the first one comes out#also never played the new resident evils!#only up until 4!#never finished 5 or 6!#also for the villain part it was so hard!!!#but trilla is such a good villain i had to put her in#honestly Cal could rival V for fav protagonist in a game tbh#same with Halo just beating Cyberpunk for best soundtrack#and Halo rivalling Fallout for fav series#and RE2 for childhood game lol#love Halo to bits!
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taylor idk who chappell roan is i think that makes me disqualified from being queer forever (←sapphic girl)
She's a musical artist! She's pretty up-and-coming right now and is seen as a wlw queer icon in the music industry, but I've never been able to get into her music even though tons of other sapphics love it. I probably just haven't given it enough of a chance. Casual is a good song though!
#big ol' personal opinions disclaimer down here in the tags. also lisia this is soooo unrelated to your question sorry lol#i also kind of hate a very specific subset of chapelle fans and i can't listen to her without thinking of them dkjfsdkjfnkdsf#which is a really stupid reason to not listen to her music and i know it but alas brains work in weird ways#i don't judge her by her fans! but i just have that tainted association. like how sometimes you feel ill after eating something#and even if that didn't cause you to be sick- you still refuse to eat it afterwards? it's like that#it's not her. she did literally nothing wrong. it's just an unfortunate little brain link that i can't get rid of#saw a couple of fans talking about toxic bisexuals and their 'inferiority complex' and that put me off of her music as a whole tbh#in regards to debates about her sexuality#one was talking about how bisexuals 'marry the patriarchy'.#quote-'bisexuals have freddy mercury. that alone is all you need' :)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) i'm going to bite someone.#it's like these few specific fans were tailor made to put me off of her#unfortunately i have not gotten past that yet but if i ever can undo that brain association and enjoy her music i will let yall know ksdjks#unfortunately as of right now i am programmed to see her name and think of the (probably very few) jackasses in her fandom#just kinda made me feel unwelcome when i was trying out her music a bit more sadly#it was never her as an artist or a person. just a few idiots but it was enough#idk. i should try again though. chapelle fans. which songs should i try to start again with?#anyways i should probably stop swinging the bat at the biphobia nest lest it come back to bite me but dkjfdksjf yeah tldr she's a musician#a very talented one! just one that i cannot enjoy quite yet. i hope i can kinda defrost about it though
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