#tay dont look

[briarpatch-kids]

I'm so tired of the whole "hey when you're designing walkable cities make sure to include disabled people so we can access the town too" gets turned into "are you saying walkable cities are ableist??" Which turns into people calling us a bitch for trying to explain that we currently live in a walkable city but can't leave the house alone because the sideways slope of the sidewalks and deep inclines for the streets make every street crossing a broken bone risk.

I live less than a mile from a carless town square, a library, two grocery stores, a post office, a medical clinic, a mental health crisis center, laundry mats, ice cream shops, book shops, bakeries, restaurants, more than I can even remember. It's amazing and exactly what a lot of you dream of. The street crossings are super safe for pedestrians, people can jog, ride bikes, and push strollers just fine. Except I still can't access any of it safely and anyone using a wheelchair or scooter is in danger. But apparently I'm an oil industry shill and a bitch for pointing that out instead of a disabled person who wants to get groceries or check a book out at the local library a few blocks away.

[birdofmay]

"I've never met anyone who didn't think much about politics or wanted to keep politics out of fun stuff who wasn't conservative or otherwise stuffed full of ugly opinions."

Leftists forgetting people with brain damage and/or ID again.

An important thing you guys have to unlearn is thinking that people who avoid politics do that because they are somehow bigoted.

Because if you think that, you throw disabled people under the bus. And leftists tend to throw disabled people under the bus all the time.

There are people who don't understand politics, or who avoid politics because it's too confusing for them, and they do that because they're disabled. And at the same time they have very similar values and opinions to yours. They're not "stuffed full of ugly opinions", they simply don't understand literature and theory.

"Well I didn't mean you guys of course" - then THINK before you write things like that and don't say something like that at all, it actively harms disabled people!

Not being as sophisticated as you doesn't mean malice!

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

autism levels, few “often get wrong” points need highlight again

[transcript: autism levels, few “often get wrong” points need highlight again]

^ masterpost by birdofmay for more basic stuff no able explain rn, like “what are levels” “how determine levels”

autism levels about how much support you need for autism specific symptoms—specifically, two autism criteria, social communication & restrictive repetitive.

not how much you feel like you struggle

levels compare you to all autistics. not allistic neurotypical nondisabled people.

level 1 mean “need support.” level 1 can struggle. unsupported burnt out level 1 can struggle a lot. unfortunately level 1 can be miserable in life.

not able finish school, not able drive, not able keep job, need help cant live independent—none of that automatic level 2 & 3. none of that automatic mean not level 1. know many people who level 1 who all that. level 2&3 people tend more common be those thing because autism symptoms cause very big struggle. but autism levels not actual about any of that.

autism levels is DSM 5 thing. country no use DSM 5 not get levels. countries use DSM 5, sometimes doctor still not assign levels, because that doctor don’t use levels, or level 1 & just leave out write.

autism level is official diagnosis thing. different from self diagnosing autism itself (which for lsn/level 1/etc have many resources about what it like, community, and like. not life risky), autism level really not same and not recommend self diagnose, to put nicely. because it about amount official support need, & limited info about level 2/3 (yes, even if look like many of us on tumblr, still very few), and because that most people never actual met entire autism spectrum met actual level 3 in person not to mention enough to be good sample size, so most have understanding of autism & autism levels that heavily lean to level 1, wrongly think any struggle w autism mean level 2 or 3. put in plainly, most you all don’t know don’t see enough about higher levels to actual label correctly (this actual include level 2/3 people—although yes personal experience, but that one experience).

many level 2 & 3 diagnose as that because we need the official support. for not die, for physical survive, and/or for basic quality of life. it not fun little label to collect to call self unfortunately

also, i say a lot of level 2/3 i abbreviate put them together because online autism community not often include both. but level 2 & 3 can be quite different quite far not “basic same thing”

autism level describe general average symptom & support needed

autism level can change over entire life, like born level 3 but adult now & level 2 or even 1(rare), or born level 1 & now adult level 2.

autism levels cannot change over hours days or short term in general. cannot “level 1 good day & level 3 bad day.” not even “last (few) month level 3 this (few) month level 1.”

autism levels not same as functioning labels. although can be use in same ableist way people use functioning labels. but fault is ableism. (remind that some people do self ID as low functioning after their diagnose and that okay)

autism level is not perfect and need improve

autism level important & needed especially for many of us who need many support or our autism symptom very big or struggle communicate.

[horribleprotagonist]

dex pining after openly out nursey, it's a classic we all love it okay BUT!!!!!!!! have we considered the far superior nursey pining after an openly queer dex??? will comes to Samwell after growing up in small town conservative Maine and dealing with homophobia on his Jr hockey teams and he decides he's not gonna hide at college he wants to be the role model he needed as a kid. and he absolutely Thrives!!! he's open and out and Radiant and he makes casual queer jokes with bitty and nursey (who is either closeted or hasn't realized his own identity yet) is just obsessed with him but doesn't understand Why so he just continues sulking and maybe staring a dex a bit too long during practice......

[jasper-stims]

holy SHIT my name change just got finalized!!!

I am officially Jasper what the fuck this is so based!!!

Happy pride i'm SO trangender!!!!

🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️

[lillypadcrochet]

I love my parents so much but I fucking hate having anti vaxxers as parents.

I really feel like I can’t tell them anything about my health and how I’m feeling, or it’s

“Oh all this autoimmune stuff didn’t start til you got all those vaccines!”

And

“ are you taking this vitamin? Are you taking that one? I just learned about this new herb combo and it’s supposed to be good for dadadadada”

And my dad bitching and moaning about how health insurance isn’t graded like cat insurance bc ‘fat people use 80% of all healthcare a year’ (source needed) and how the only covid super spreaders were fat people bc their immune systems suck (idk how that’s supposed to work?)

I just love them and respect their input on everything else! But fr I wish I could discuss my health with them without having to smile and nod through a bunch of bullshit about WesTeRN MediCInE and some bullshit chiropractic supplement

[aurora1040]

My Grampa is was just in the hospital. The drs are pretty certain that its stage 4 cancer. They wont get the results back until the 24th.

I'm going to be leaving by Tuesday to go be with Grampa and family at least until we get the prognosis. Depending on how much longer he has left to live, I may stay until his passing. Hopefully he has more time left on him, though.

He is my last grandparent on my Dad's side and he has a special place in my heart. As sad as I am that his time is ending, more than anything I just want to be there with my family when it happens. I think I would regret not being there for my family when we lose him more than anything.

[briarpatch-kids]

Other people's disability being more severe doesn't make your disability go away. Severely disabled people aren't a threat unless you think it's a competition. You still deserve the accommodations and assistance that you need. You still deserve kindness and understanding for the struggles you undergo. But I'm still gonna say something if you spout off about how you're just as disabled as me when you can both walk and breathe without assistance.

[birdofmay]

[Because this is Tumblr: My country doesn't have autism levels, so I'm not going to say level 3, and I'm not going to say high support needs - I was diagnosed with severe autism as a child, and most autistics in this category use severe autism for themselves. It's not a bad word, it's not "the same as functioning labels". Listen to us for once please 😑😑]

A difficult thing about severe autism, especially in combination with severe intellectual disability, is that sometimes you can't tell the individual about another perspective, a different opinion, or try to say "Yes, in your case, but not all", because it's too much for the brain to handle in an already extremely confusing world.

I don't have ID, but I was extremely developmentally delayed, and I remember the fear, anger, and confusion I felt whenever somebody tried to tell me something that wasn't in alignment with my beliefs.

Autism makes it already hard to switch perspectives, and with severe autism, the world is one big chaos and makes no sense, and once things settled and you think you finally understood your little world, suddenly somebody says a contradictory thing and booom, chaos again.

So sometimes people with more or less severe ID and severe autism only see their perspective and their life, and therefore what they say and think seems pretty "black and white" to outsiders, but it's important not to tell them "Hey, this isn't always true, this is only partly correct", because what you try to tell them is too complex for an already overwhelmed brain.

And that's difficult to accept sometimes, but rest assured that somebody will at some point find a way to modify the knowledge you want to share in a way that it's not confusing and overwhelming, when the time is right.

I just wanted to say that because very often people hear or read something and immediately go "Hey, not necessarily ☝🏼", and then they don't understand why the individual melts down and screams, when they "just wanted to add on, that...".

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

whenever talk about level of autism (1/2/3) and support need labels (low/mid/high), see bunch people say how they don’t like levels because can’t be described by single number or single word, and how if someone want know what they need help with, just ask, disabled people know their needs!

by all means, allowed feel this way for self! this post not way say you must like autism levels or support need labels for self.

and yes! ableism & infantization like assume all disabled people not able know self, so it sensitive topic for many, and true that many disabled people do know own self & needs & disability & limits.

but do notice pattern: often, people who say this, more likely comparatively less language & communication struggle, comparatively less intellectual & cognitive struggle, and able be somewhat independent—people who can know and explain their needs in timely manner—which become problem when they go beyond talk about self and try speak for all autistic (or I/DD, or disabled) people. become problem when say “levels/support needs labels useless and gloss over details and ableist, just ask disabled people themselves we can answer for self.”

(human experience complex. no one number/word/phrase/label can perfectly explain all experience. this include levels, support needs, but also diagnoses like autism.)

here only some! reasons why some autistic people cannot explain struggle & what need help with, why need quick short easy remember word like autism level & support needs labels & severity (but other I/DD may feel similar, but wide and am not entire know don’t want generalize. people with dementia and similar may also feel similar) :

1. cannot communicate all

autism impact social communication ability. may not able explain all complex need and how exactly help. may not have language and word for all. may only able say few words. may only able know few words. may not have functional communication. may not have any word communication.

2. cognitive struggle, cannot remember all, cannot understand all

may be too often confused or overwhelm or brain not clear to explain. may not able know what specific need help with, just “need help.” maybe not remember all thing need help with. may not remember need explain. may not able understand need help. may not understand need explain need help.

3. too much, or take too long explain, too private for random internet, but need something

“level 3” “high support need” may not tell you what exactly need, but definitely tell you “will need a LOT more help than most people, need especially watch out for.” because “autism” not specific enough.

mid/high support need, level 2/3, moderate/severe, often struggle with so much and need help on so much, even if able perfect communicate & cognitive, actual explain can take very long, even hours or more and only touch basic. many half joke about name what don’t need help with faster.

during time sensitive emergencies, or “you don’t need all my medical info but you need know” situations, or “no time/space need be short & sweet summary” situations: ambulance, medical ID, lanyard, ER, quick medical intake paperwork, be/about be called police on, be see as suspicious / act “weird.” all no time/space/ability say anything more than few words.

even outside that. it personal medical info. some don’t want name all. for some, say all bring out many emotions and trauma, like embarrassed or ashamed or hopeless.

why do you say autistic instead list all autism symptoms everytime? same reason why many people use & need autism levels and support needs labels.

4. specific for so called “outdated” autism severity: not all able change language. not all want change language. not everywhere have levels. for some, severity most accurate describe how autism symptoms impact.

so, no, not all autistic people, not all disabled people able know & explain self! not all able answer for self! some may only able use quick summary words like autism levels & support needs & severity, some none at all. some need others help explain, some need lanyard or other visual ID for everyone see explanation because we autism visible and everyone already see.

remember us

[aurora1040]

thats actually a really good saying. I'll be using that.

I came up with a new saying:

"You wouldn't bake a cat just because it jumped into the oven."

It means that just having a really, really good opportunity to do something awful is not an excuse to do it. That it isn't enough that you never go out of your way to do evil, you're also supposed to go out of your way to do the right thing, even in situations where the wrong thing to do would be extremely easy and profitable, and passively allowing it to happen would be easier than going out of your way to do better than that.

[horribleprotagonist]

have some more hilson poetry if you'd like

"informed consent"

[Image description in alt text]

also!! both house poems ( + some other fandom poetry) are up on my AO3 if you'd like to read it there!!

[lillypadcrochet]

This is kinda gonna be a niche rant post but I’m really struggling in my career path lately

….

So to be a child life specialist you need 600 internship hours. And those internships are insanely competitive so I decided to go to the graduate program that basically matches you with internships. AND I STILL CANT GET A FUCKING INTERNSHIP!!!! The hospital I was supposed to be at this spring dropped me because I was taking too long to get my health clearances and so now I’m at a freaking EI place which is BARELY CHILD LIFE and my supervisor took me on as a PITY JOB because she’s an alum from the program.

And then for the fall one program saw my application and didn’t even want to interview me! And two others I matched at and interviewed at and they BOTH said I wasn’t showing the BREADTH OF KNOWLEDGE they need from interns!!! But I thought the interviews went really well! And most people are accepted by both internships they interview at but apparently I’m so pathetic nobody wants me as an intern!!!

And now I spoke with my advisor and she said they might not be able to get me into a traditional internship setting because so many places have already chosen interns but if I don’t intern in the fall I can’t graduate!!!! They might even beg my current internship to take me on for longer! And I can’t fucking take another community based setting because it’s not Really child life and I won’t actually have any job experience!!!!!!

I’m just so upset and I hate myself for fucking up my spring internship and I hate myself for flopping my interviews and I hate myself for being the worst student the programs ever had and I hate hate hate this!!!!!! I should have done something else I should have chosen a different career path

I HATE MYSELF AND THIS STUPID FUCKING PROCESS

Not to mention how exorbitantly expensive this fucking program is!!!! And how high the cost of living is in this city!!! I’m gonna have so much fucking student debt and no job prospects!!!!

[briarpatch-kids]

I think I'm a better person because of my disability, I have a perspective that I wouldn't have gotten as an able bodied person and I've met a lot of people along the way who taught me a lot of things.

However, if an able bodied person told me "everything happens for a reason! You learned so much from it!" I think I'd fight them to the death.

[aurora1040]

Reminder that this brand switches NAMES whenever they are called out.

DO NOT BUY ANY LITTER BOXES THAT LOOK LIKE THIS ONE, DO NOT TRUST THEM, ASSUME THEY ARE ALL CAT KILLERS

litter box warning

spreading this person's PSA here onto tumblr bc this seems very important for everyone to know if you're not on Twitter: here's the link to their full post.

[birdofmay]

I briefly want to talk about why "proving your diagnosis" to strangers online is absolutely useless, and especially if you want to prove it to a stranger.

I'll use two documents I was allowed to upload.

What does this photo say or prove to you? Well, first of all, absolutely nothing if you don't understand German. And all my documents are in German. This is it in English:

"Diagnosis: Motor coordination disorder with dynamic equinus"

I don't even know how to translate this properly. It's not developmental coordination disorder, aka dyspraxia. It doesn't even have an ICD code. Doctors love not to use ICD codes when it comes to the development of disabled people where I live, they rather describe the symptoms. All it means is that I struggle with motor coordination, either due to brain damage or specifically because of my cerebral palsy. And that I limp (equinus).

But does it really prove that? No, all you know is that somebody took a picture of this document and uploaded it. It has no date and no name and you can't even see the name of the institution. Because you always censor that, that's basic internet safety.

Another one:

In English:

"You are applying for coverage of the costs of early intervention at the early intervention centre [redacted] for your above-mentioned child.

According to the medical opinion I have received, your child requires early intervention because of an imminent or significant disability."

If you know German law, you'll realise that this is an older document because they don't say "wesentliche Behinderung" anymore now. Alright. But does it tell you that I'm disabled and was in early intervention? Does it tell you that there are medical documents that prove that I have a significant disability?

No, it tells you that somebody uploaded a medical document. And that sensitive information is redacted. And you always redact sensitive information, that's basic internet safety.

I could be someone who has access to these documents, maybe because a family member is disabled. Or because it's my job and the document belongs to one of my patients.

It would be even easier for autistics who really were in early intervention and group therapies or special education, and therefore know many peers who "have it worse", so to speak. Maybe I'm friends with someone who's severely developmentally delayed, and they once sent me something that proves their significant disability. I could censor and upload that, and I could start roleplaying because 1. I absolutely know what their life is like and 2. I have the "proof" to back it up.

So what would really prove it?

I'd have to take a picture of an identity card or maybe even my disability ID card, and then I'd need to start a video call to show them my face and, again, my ID. That would prove that I am me, and that the documents belong to me.

And you don't do that with strangers, especially not internet strangers.

So you see, there's absolutely no way to reliably prove your disability to internet strangers.

Therefore, whenever somebody asks you to prove your diagnosis, just ignore them. You can't prove it. You just can't.