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pileofboneswrites · 5 months ago

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TAILSPIN.

SUMMARY — after receiving an unintelligible call from jax, your rush back to charming to discover your son, abel, has been kidnapped by camerson hayes, and worst yet, he also killed your younger brother that you practically raised.

PAIRING — exhusband!jax teller x fem!halfsack'ssister!reader | juice ortiz x reader

WORD COUNT — 3.8k

WARNINGS — established relationship(s), kidnapping, murder, death, past child neglect (about reader and her brother), divorce, premature birth, pregnancy complications, agent stahl, swearing, fighting, angst, loss of loved ones, suicidal thoughts, contemplation of suicide, cheating, allusion to smut but no description, no use of y/n (she's actually only outwardsly referenced 2 times and is referred to as miss epps or epps).

AUTHORS NOTES — just to clear somethings up; jax married reader instead of wendy, and instead of drugs being the reason abel was born early it was just due to pregnancy complications.

MASTERLIST | SONS OF ANARCHY

your heart was slamming rapidly into your ribcage, panic rolling off your skin in waves. you push the pedal to the floor, the idea of a speeding ticket not even remotely close to crossing your mind. this was your fault, it was. leaving charming, even for a few hours always felt like it had consequences. something bad always seemed to happen the moment you crossed the county line. your tires squeal as you peel into the teller-morrow parking lot, slamming your car in park as you jump out, only barely remembering to take off your seatbelt as you go. clay, piney, and opie are standing by the entrance to the clubhouse, sad expressions creasing their features.

"what happened?!" you ask, your voice loud, panicked and harsh.

the surprise on their faces from your tone has silence ringing in your ears. you'd known them for years, opie, jax and you being quite the troublesome trio through most of your youth. they'd never heard you raise your voice before, let alone the venom behind your words.

"someone answer me!" you shout, your entire body vibrates from the panic working its way down to your stomach.

you're going to puke if someone doesn't tell you what the hell is going on, and soon. you'd received a rather frantic voicemail from jax last night and hadn't been able to reach him since, which is what made you turn your car around and head for the clubhouse. his voice was shakey, and you couldn't hear a damn thing that made sense. but you know jax, and jax doesn't panic. he's dealt with and seen it all through the years, he's not easy to shake. so hearing your husband–well soon-to-be ex-husband–in that state had your mind reeling.

"kiddo, you need to take a deep breath." clay starts, attempting to sling an arm around your shoulders.

you shrug him off, "no! you need to tell me what the hell is going on, and why jax called me in a panic, and where the hell he is!"

it comes out as one rushed sentence, barely comprehensible but opie steps towards you. he rests a large hand on your shoulder, a distraught look on his face.

"we need you to take a breath, seriously, epps. i'll tell exactly what's happening, but you've barely taken a breath since walking over here, and you look like you're going to passout."

you nod, sucking in some extremely needed air. you take a second to just regulate yourself, and in that time, opie steers you over to one of the picnic tables. you sit down, back to the table and once you've calmed a little, you cross your arms and look up at him expectantly.

"alright, now, tell me."

he glances back at clay, and at his dad, before looking back to you. they turn and walk into the clubhouse, giving you two some privacy.

"cameron hayes killed your brother because he thinks gemma killed edmund,"

"w-what?" you ask, bottom lip wobbling, your head is spinning

your baby brother is... dead? eddie is dead? cameron hayes killed your brother? you shake your head, wiping your eyes on the sleeve of your flannel. you'd practically raised eddie. your mom was a drunk, and your dad had left long before you could form any memories of him. so, from ten on, you were big sister, mommy and daddy all rolled into one. you taught him manners, how to use the toilet, how to cook, how to flirt with girls, and so many more things. you'd been there for every step of his life, cheering loud enough to drown out the naysayers.

when he left for the military you were terrified that you'd get that call every parent dreds. sure, you weren't really his mom, you couldn't be with the five year age gap, but in all the areas that mattered, you were. eddie was your first kid in a twisted sense, and knowing that he'd made it all the way home from iraq, only to die at the hands of someone affiliated with the club that he loved so much shattered your heart.

"n-no, that's not possible, i-i just sp-spoke to eddie, we-we just spoke this morning. h-he said he and-and-and-and," you're spiraling, mind and heart racing faster, and faster before your expression drops, and your mind clears. "abel. he was taking tara back to jax's to get some of abel's things. where is my baby? where's abel, harry? where is my baby?"

you're sobbing uncontrollably, your entire body shaking as you slide off the seat of the picnic table, onto the concrete. opie pulls you into his chest, and you sob into his shirt. it's another first for all of them, watching you breakdown, watching you cry.

"we're going to find abel," opie says into your ear, trying to calm you down, it doesn't help, you just cry harder.

it shouldn't have happened in the first place! the club was on lockdown. losing eddie is hard enough, but losing your son in the same span of minutes is devastating. it takes you twenty minutes, but when you finally pull yourself together again you pat opie's arm, and stand up.

"where is jax?" you ask quietly, taking a deep breath.

"he's at home, we're heading over there now, let juice drive you, you shouldn't be driving right now." opie says, and you nod.

normally you'd fight him, which he's well aware of, but knowing your son is god knows where has you in an anxious tailspin. you don't have the energy to fight with anyone right now. opie walks you over to your car, tucking you into the passenger seat and waiting by the door for the other's to come out of the clubhouse.

"what happened exactly?" your voice is barely a whisper, and opie looks worried.

"are you sure you want the run down right now?" he questions, and you immediately nod, your eyes on the hood of your car.

"please, ope," its the most desperate, pathetic sound to ever cross your lips, but you have to know.

he takes a deep breath, "what tara says happened, is that gemma took off while they were out, so she sent your brother to watch over her, and she went to jax's house. stahl freaked, shot edmund hayes, gemma shot polly, and stahl pinned the blame on her. half– eddie took off to find tara, and cameron must have followed him from their safe house. cameron was going to kill abel, but your brother stepped in, and got stabbed in the process. he tied her up in the nursery, and left with abel."

"the same man who killed my brother, has my son?" you ask, and he nods. "and tara just let him take my son?"

"well, i wouldn't say that—"

"everyone's ready," juice says, stepping up to the driver's side window, pulling the door open.

"hang tight," opie says, patting your knee before closing the door, and walking over to his bike.

"hey baby," juice says softly, "i'm sorry."

you nod, but don't say anything. you pull your seatbelt on, and lean back. you and juice had been together for a couple of months, with jax's blessing of course. he'd been great, amazing even. part of you would always love jax in a way that juice would understand, and he was okay with that. knowing you would be crawling into bed with him every night was good enough to ease any worries he might have had. juice had been rock solid in your life, a shoulder you privately cried on when jax had initially asked for the divorce.

you saw it coming from a mile away, while you'd loved each other greatly, it just wasn't the same kind. you knew that in the beginning, the middle and especially at the end. you also knew that if you didn't agree, or you tried to convince him to stay, that you'd lose him for real. he'd grow to resent you, and you'd grown to hate him for resenting you. you couldn't live in a world where jax wasn't at least a part of your life in some capacity. so that meant an amicable split, and seeing him when you dropped off abel. despite what most people think about your relationship, things haven't changed.

jax is still one of your best friends, and when you're not working, you're usually at his house. your relationship label may have changed, but your relationship hadn't. opie had been the most worried when you'd told him you were getting divorced. his two best friends splitting? nightmare. but when you told him there were no hard feelings, well, he actually didn't believe you at first. it took seeing you both in action to actually understand that you were serious. then, you found out you were pregnant.

it didn't change anything, you were still getting divorced, but jax was actually really excited. he'd told you about all his worries about becoming a father, and you reassured him that he'd be great. in turn he did the same for you. he joined you at every appointment, and played a very active role in your pregnancy. he helped you find an apartment close to his house, and spent a lot of time by your side helping you with nursery set up, moving, and everything in between.

gemma was probably the most heartbroken over your split. she loved you just as much as (and sometimes more than) jax. she helped you a lot over the years, especially when she found out about her grandbaby. gemma made the transition from wife, to ex and baby momma so much easier. she was a cheerleader for you, and always in your corner. you were incredibly lucky to have them, and be in the situation you were in. tara on the other hand... she was the opposite. gemma clocked it the moment you went into labour prematurely.

you'd been stressed over work, being the only manager on an already understaffed team was difficult but so was being pregnant. you'd never planned on getting pregnant, so there were a lot of things at work you decided were to be dealt with later. the moment you found out, you were trying your damnedest to get things ready. the stress got to you, and manifested itself in making your pregnancy high risk, and then landing you in the hospital way earlier than you should have been. it was obvious to you the moment jax came to see you after abel was born that tara thought it was your fault.

later it became clear to you that she just didn't like you, something you didn't notice in your teen years. you'd never really spent any time with her then, but the more time you spent with her after your son's birth, because lets face it anytime you went to visit jax she was there. all smiles, and cooing at your son until jax left the room, and then a scowl and general disinterest in you reared its ugly head. now things were different. she let a terrorist kill your baby brother, and kidnapp your son. karma was about to take her ass for a ride, and you were going to be driving.

"hey," juice says, his warm hand finding yours over the center console, snapping you from your thoughts. "we're here,"

you turn your head, and see clay speaking to tara in the doorway. your vision goes dark. you don't even remember getting out of the car, let alone walking over to tara and grabbing a handful of her hair. you're yelling is incomprehensible, but it's obvious to onlookers that you're sobbing as you beat the shit out of her. you come to again with juice's arms around you, pulling you into the house, and opie pulling tara inside into a different room. your only injury is three claw marks across your cheek, but tara is quite a bit worse for ware.

"what the hell were you thinking?!" jax snaps at you, upon pulling you away from juice, and into abel's nursery.

"i was thinking about how that bitch let some guy take my fucking baby and kill my baby brother!" you scream at him, breaking down all over again. "my baby..."

his expression softens, and he wraps an arm around you, pulling you into a hug. you sob into his shoulder, loud, heartbreaking, borderline violent wails.

"i'm sorry about your brother, i really am, but you can't blame tara."

you pull back, weaseling away from his grip, "can't i?"

"it could have happened to anyone, it could have happened to you."

"i would have died, jackson, and i think you better than anyone knows that. i would have died for abel. for eddie. i would not have let that man get away with everything i love." you say, sobering, violent, hot anger courses through you. "i would have died or killed him. i wouldn't have let him walk out the door."

he just stares at you. his once bright blue eyes dark, like the light behind them died. you know he knows exactly how you feel. that he blames tara to some degree. but you don't really care. you're numb. your heart aching in a way you've never felt before. in a way you'd never wish upon your worst enemy. tara included, despite what she did. the worst part is you don't have the one person you want to talk to about it. eddie died protecting her, and his nephew. what did tara do? she let herself get tied up, let cameron take your baby, let cameron kill your brother. tara lost nothing, and once again, you've lost everything.

"i want to kill her jax," you say finally, after what feels like an eternity of silence, his sad eyes just staring back at you. "that's not rational, not right. but i've just lost the two single most important people in my life, and i want to kill her for it."

"i understand what you're saying, why you're saying it," he says slowly, "but you're right, it's not rational."

"when abel comes home, she's not allowed to be around him by herself. i don't care what that means. i don't feel comfortable with her being alone with our son." you tell him, fingers grasping the cool leather of his kutte to pull him in closer. "i don't want to see, hear or think about her until then, and you bet your ass, i'm coming with you to bring him home, whatever, and wherever that takes us."

jax briefly looks scared of you, but he collects himself just as quickly as you let him go, and brush past him back out the way you came.

"you're lucky you're not dead," you seeth, flipping tara off with both hands as you walk back out to your car.

worried about your well-being and your mental state, jax sends juice home with you when you leave. the drive to your apartment, albeit quick, is silent. how does one comfort someone who lost both their only child, and only brother in a matter of minutes? besides, juice knows you well enough to know that you'll talk when you're ready. if you're ever ready. and right now? you don't know if you'll ever be. the fear of unraveling that far scares you. so for now, you think positively, and you keep moving forward.

it takes four hours, before agent stahl is in your living room, sitting on your couch. juice stands in the kitchen, watching the exchange from the sink, where he's washing your lunch dishes.

"so, mrs teller, where were you yesterday afternoon?" she asks, and you immediately understand why the club hates the woman so much.

"the divorce might not be finalized yet, but it's miss epps, and i was half-way to seattle."

"ah, yes, i forgot about that... why were you heading to seattle?"

"i don't really see how that's going to get my son back, seeing as you know who took him already."

"we need to get a picture together of everyone's movements."

"i got a phone call a few days ago, my mother's in the hospital there. she wanted to see me, so i was going."

"as i understand it, you aren't close with your mother?"

"no. look, agent stahl, this isn't helping. get your ass out there and look for my son. you're the reason my brother died, i'm not interested in you being the reason my son dies too. do your fucking job." you abruptly stand up, and walk into the kitchen.

you want to throw something. you want to scream. you want to be violent and aggressive. you miss your brother. you miss your baby. you want them back. most of all, you want this nightmare to be over.

when jax tells you they're heading to ireland, you pack light, but take abel's favourite stuffed animal, a white bear with a blue hat, mitts, scarf and booties. you carry the bear with you, hugging it tightly when you worry you're about to fall apart. jax's reassuring hand on your knee, and juice's hand in yours keeps your grounded. you lose yourself a little every time you think you're going to see abel, and then are denied at the last moment.

when father ashby finally drops the bomb on you and jax; that he'd been adopted, sold to another family, you break down. father ashby tries to comfort you, but nothing he says changes anything.

"i don't care about your fucking god, i don't. i don't care about your promise to john teller. i want my fucking baby back. your cousin has caused me enough pain; by killing my fucking brother. don't make the mistake of keeping my son from me." you scream, uncaring who hears you. "i'm sure you know the saying desperate people, do desperate things. desperate doesn't even begin to cover what i am, and what i'm willing to do to get abel in my arms, and back home."

you lay in bed all day, the blanket pulled up over your head, your eyes squeezed closed, the bear tucked under your arm. you've felt sick from the moment you'd heard that abel might be gone. whisked away by some—in their defence, probably oblivious, but lovely—couple, about to be taken god knows where. the very notion, that you could go home empty handed hurts, burns, stabs at your heart. you feel like someone's cut you open, and taken a knife to your chest. poking and proding at all the parts you should never poke and prod at.

you've never felt worse in your life; physically, mentally, and emotionally. you're drained, exhausted, and contemplating ending your life. you've never felt so low. you're almost embarrassed as the idea crosses your mind, but the longer you stew, the longer it seems like a really appealing idea. incredibly selfish, but desperation is like that. you weren't sure how jax was downstairs, enjoying the night, the party, the people... how he wasn't suffocating, like you were. everthing is falling apart, collapsing around you, and he's acting like everything's a-ok.

you don't hear the bedroom door open, but you startle when you feel the bed dip behind you. fight mode activates, and you leap from the bed, eyes scanning for a weapon. then you see jax's face in the reflection of the window, your heart rate slows.

"you asshole, make some noise when you move around. i thought i was about to get murdered..." you close your eyes, hands dropping to your sides. "why are you here?"

"i'm so sorry," his voice is barely a whisper, you vaguely make out the trembling of his bottom lip, and the tears streaming down his face. "this never– never should have happened."

your expression softens, and you sink back down on the small bed. you pull jax in, his head resting on your shoulder as you hold him. you'd only ever seen him cry a few times, but that was usually how you could tell he was past his breaking point. jax always perseveres, pushing forward. you're the slightly unstable, completely unhinged one. he's the calm, rational thinker.

"i don't blame you." you tell him, "i don't even blame tara, anymore. i blame stahl. it's her fault all this shit happened. had she not shot edmund, none of this would have happened."

he nods against your shoulder, then lifts his head. the kiss is unexpected, but not unwelcome or unwanted. the sex is fantastic, it always is with jax, but it just further complicates an already complicated situation. it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out what happened come morning when juice pops his head into the room to see how you're doing. he's hurt, but he understands to an extent. he loves abel. he loves you and by extension abel is part of you, so what's not to love? under normal circumstances, he knows this would not be an issue, but nothing about what's happening is normal.

he knows you're grieving, he knows as abel's father, jax can relate to your struggles more than anyone. what he doesn't understand, is why, even while in the midst of a divorce, the pair of you would do something like that. how despite this, he shoves his concerns aside, and closes the door, banging heavily on it to wake the pair of you. he doesn't avoid your eye, or not take your hand when you reach for his, or walk out of every room you walk into. he instead, keeps his mouth shut, and supports you. the guilt gnaws at you, and you spend the majority of the day avoiding jax, and he you (and juice).

after your night with jax, you brush your hair, actually get dressed, and spend the afternoon playing cards with juice, opie and happy, and try really hard to feel normal. it works for a few hours, until you find out that your son has been taken, again from his new adopted parents, and that they were brutally murdered in their hotel room. discovering jimmy was behind it surprises no one, but sets you into yet another tailspin. terrified of what could happen to him, terrified that jimmy would kill him if he got too annoying.

luckily, your fears never play out, because father ashby trades himself for abel. when jax walks back through the doors of the apartment you'd all been staying in, with abel in his arms you can't help the happy tears. shaky, holding your breath, hand over your mouth, you stare at your unharmed baby in jax's arms. seeing abel for the first time in what feels like an eternity is like a cold water shock to your system. when jax hands him over to you, letting you finally hold your son after weeks without him.

he smiles up at you, cooing softly, and reaching for your hair. it's like every bad, anxiety moment slips away. it doesn't matter that he was gone, all that matter's is that he's home, in your arms, surrounded by all the people who fought to bring him home, his family.

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samcrosfaith · 8 days ago

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GONE WITH THE SIN / CHAPTER EIGHT

Happy Lowman x fem!oc

authors note; You can find all chapters of this story in my main masterlist pinned post it'll lead you to the right masterlist! I appreciate every like, comment and/or reblog! 🖤🍒

tag list; @ravennaortiz @mamawiggers1980 @tommyflanaganfan-blog @adoreemee @delightfulheroshoeflap @jp1019 @sjester42-blog @mayanqueenxx @aimkatsz

word count; 2577

TARA SQUINTED HER EYES against the sun as she looked over at Randi, silent at first. It was unusual for her best friend and sister-in-law to be so quiet, normally Randi had this bubbly personality, this infectious good mood.

But not today.

"Okay, are you so quiet because of what happened to Happy or because of Julia?" Tara stopped in the middle of the sidewalk and stopped Randi as well by gently olding her arm, the coffee to-go in her other hand. "Just talk to me, say anything. But this silence is creepy, really."

Randi remained silent for another moment before finally giving in to Tara's curious gaze, a frustrated sigh falling from her lips. "Both, I guess. Shit, I was really scared, especially because I had no idea what happened. And then..then that bitch storms into the room andᅳ"

Randi shook her head, her lips in a thin line as she looked away, staring at the coffee to-go she was holding. "He said he was single, that there was no other woman. I wouldn't have slept with him otherwise."

Tara almost choked on the sip of coffee she had just taken, staring at Randi with wide eyes. "You slept with him? And you're only telling me this now?!"

"Sorry", the brunette replied with a wry smirk and a shrug. "It just happened somehow. I knew it was going to happen the moment I let him into my apartment though. I have no self-control around that man."

"But what does that mean now? I mean..was it just sex or more?" Tara hooked her arm through Randi's and slowly strolled on, curious to hear more. "I would really be happy for you guys if you could work things out, you were really happy with him."

"Yeah, I was. Until I ruined it." Randi let out a bitter snort, the anger at herself still gnawing at her. "In Seattle, I really thought it could work out again. Shit, I even seriously considered giving up everything to come back after spending the week with him", she admitted before clicking her tongue. "But apparently he already has someone. And lied to me on top of that."

Tara didn't miss the bitterness, the sadness in Randi's words as she stopped in her tracks again. "He didn't lie to you, Randi. Julia is nothing more than a bed warmer for him, a croweater. Happy isn't in a relationship. You know full well that you were the only one he could even imagine this life with."

"But why was she there then?! Did you see how she threw herself at him?" Randi asked through a huff, but she was just hurt. "Do you have any fuckin' idea how much it hurt to see another woman worry about him? That's my job; was my job."

"Julia is always around him and is desperately trying to become more than a croweaterᅳ but she never will." With a small smile, Tara nudged Randi's shoulder. "Happy told me to tell you to come back later. And believe me, Julia was with him less than two minutes. He doesn't want her, he wants you and we all know that."

"You really think so?" Randi usually wasn't an insecure person, but she didn't know what to think or feel at the moment. "I still love him, I realized that last weekᅳ although I never doubted it. Butᅳ"

"But your job is getting in the way", Tara finished the sentence for her friend, her tone full of understanding. "I used to be like you. My career was so important to me that I blocked out everything around me. Don't get me wrong, I love my job; but sometimes I wonder what would've happened if I had never left Charming back then."

"Maybe you'd have five kids with Jax by then", Randi chuckled, her sour mood finally fading a little. "Dancing was all I ever dreamed of until I met Happy. But then I got the letter and..I was afraid that I would regret it one day if I hadn't taken the chance."

"Hey, it's okay that you chose that path", Tara smiled weakly. "And if we're honest, moving to Seattle seems to have shown you what you really want. A life with Happy."

"Yeah, maybe", Randi sighed, turned the next corner and changed the subject after taking another sip of her coffee. "Shit, this really is the best coffee in townᅳ no, the best coffee in the whole freakin' world", Randi gushed.

"Well, I guess you'll only get it daily again if you come back to Charming", Tara said with a wink, which made both women laugh before they spent some more time in the nearby park to catch up on all the things they haven't talked about while Randi was gone.

ᅳ

THERE SHE STOOD, in front of her house. The house she bought with Happy a little over two years ago. Okay, he had paid most of it, after all he had more money after selling his old, smaller house. But Randi had put in every dollar she had saved, even though Happy told her she didn't have to.

The yellow facade was already peeling a bit, but it still looked just as cozy as it did a year ago. The sun, which hung high in the sky and beat down on Charming, cast an extra warm glow on the property. The lawn was freshly mowed, the small palm bushes on the sides looked well-kept.

Probably, and the Morrow woman was pretty sure of this, it was Gemma's work. Her mother had a very specific love of plants and probably just wanted to make sure that the garden was still well-kept even though it wasn't even her house.

Excitement bubbled up inside her as she headed to the door and turned the key she had kept all year. Taking another deep breath, she entered the house and immediately found herself in the living room, and the memories she had collected here hit her like a truck.

But what she noticed first was the distant scent of Happy, his scent probably clinging to the furniture, spread throughout the house. She closed her eyes for a moment after letting her duffle bag slip from her shoulder, enjoying the quiet moment as she folded her arms across her chest.

She felt at home.

The lump in her throat was hard to swallow as her eyelids fluttered open again, her brown orbs taking everything in. The pictures in the living room, of her and Happy, club parties, of Happy's mom. Nothing had changed. The furniture was the same, even her favorite dark green blanket lay on the couch, neatly folded.

Randi wasn't surprised, she knew that Happy was a neat freak and needed everything clean. She had always been the chaos queenᅳ and still was.

Her path led to the kitchen, the largest room in the house. The previous owner had installed a new kitchen just before he moved out, the white cabinets and stainless steel appliances still shone like they did on the first day they moved in.

A smile tugged at the corners of her mouth, but at the same time pain tugged at her heartstrings as she thought about the last conversation here where she had begged Happy to come with her. The look of real pain and anger on his face was burned into her memory and still haunted her today.

Her breath hitched in her lungs before her feet quickly carried her into the next rooms until she finally stood in the bedroom, her heart heavy as she came to a stop in front of their bed. Randi hesitated for a brief second, but she had to do it.

Shaking her combat boots off her feet, Randi fell back onto the bed, some of her brown hair splayed out around her head. She just stared at the ceiling for a while before rolling onto her side and pulling Happy's pillow against her chest, burying her face deep in it.

And when his scent filled her nostrils again, much stronger this time, she just wanted to come back home. Inhaling his scent had such a calming effect on her that she fell asleep within a minute. Sleep that she probably needed more than she had thought.

ᅳ

A LOUD RUMBLE ECHOED through the house, startling Randi awake. Confused, she looked around until she remembered that she must've fallen asleep earlier.

But she was on high alert right away as the noises grew louder. The brunette slid off the bed silently, pulled her duffel bag closer, and rummaged through it for her gun, something she always carried with her. If Happy had taught her one thing, it was to never be unarmed; that had always been the most important thing to him.

With the gun firmly in her hands, Randi slowly stepped into the hallway and let out a loud gasp when Happy came around the corner and ran straight into her, his expression almost amused as she stared at him in shock and immediately put the gun aside.

"Jesus Hap! I almost shot you", she scolded in concern, running her shaky fingers through her hair.

"You kept it", he noted with a rasp, followed by a slight grin. "Atta girl."

"You could've said it was you sooner!" Randi said with a scoff and shoved him in the chest, slapping her palm against her forehead as Happy let out a low growl, his face twisting in pain. "Oh my god, shit, sorry. Sit down!"

"I'm fine", the SAA grunted as Randi gently pushed him towards the couch. He sat down reluctantly, every movement still straining.

"What are you even doing here?" Randi stubbornly asked. When she stood in front of him, right between his legs, she put her hands on her hips, looking like a younger copy of her mother. "I bet the doctors didn't tell you that you were good to go home. Am I right or am I right?"

Of course, the concern for him increased immensely, after all, his injuries weren't exactly harmless.

"You didn't come", he stated simply, his eyes now locked with hers. "So I came. And don't even try to convince me to go back."

"Butᅳ" Randi paused, cursing under her breath as Happy shot her a look that clearly said 'don't even try'. "I was sleeping, otherwise I would've come. I'm sorry, but first I was out with Tara, then I spent some hours with Mom and Dad to catch up, and then I just fell asleep here."

Happy shook his head, his hand reaching for her wrist to pull her onto his lap, no matter how much pain it caused him. "You needed sleep, it's fine. But I need to talk to you and it can't wait."

"I mean, it's kind of sweet that you left the hospital just because you wanted to talk", she admitted, the smallest smile on her lips. Still, she was worried about him, his health. "I assume it's about Julia? Tara already told me she's not your new girlfriend", Randi told him softly as she played with the hem of his white shirt. "But why was she there then, Hap? There has to be more."

"But there isn't. There's nothing between Julia and me, little girl", Happy croaked firmly, his uninjured arm wandering around her waist. "She wants more, but I've told her a thousand times that I'm not looking."

"But you slept with her." Randi caught her lower lip between her teeth, her eyes slowly meeting Happy's. "How many times? How long did that go on?"

"You really wanna do this now?", Happy asked, suddenly looking just as tormented as Randi. Hurting her was the last thing he wanted. "You just took off, and eventually I had to get rid of my frustration. So, a few months. Nothing serious, but sometimes I just needed someone next to me and fuckin' pretend that it was you."

"Okay", Randi breathed, appreciating that he was honest instead of lying to her. Still, it hurt. "Iᅳ shit, I know it's my own fault, but I hate the thought of another woman getting so close to you."

"Hey." Happy grabbed her jaw, pulling her head a little closer. So close that he could rest his forehead against hers. "I'll never want another woman, but I didn't know if you'd come back."

"I don't blame you, Happy, I really don't", she sniffed, her lips brushing his. "I wasn't entirely innocent in Seattle myself. I tried to get you out of my system somehow but it didn't help, you were always there, always in my mind."

"You slept with someone?" Happy's eyes darkened, all his muscles tensing under her delicate touch.

But who was he to get upset now? He had slept with another woman himself, more than once. But the thought of another man having his dirty hands on his womanᅳ he hated it.

Randi nodded almost shyly. "Yeah, with Steven. But it was only once andᅳ"

Happy raised a hand, his eyebrows drawn together, clearly not thrilled. "Steven. Your boss Steven?"

Randi nodded again, followed by a sigh as her gaze was fixed on Happy, whose face she cupped in her hands. "But just as Julia means nothing to you, he means nothing to me."

"Does he know that, too?", Happy asked, letting out a huff. But again, he had no right to be angry.

"Yeah, we both didn't make a big deal out of it", Randi shot back sternly, shifting until she was sitting properly on his lap and could face him. "It was a mistake, a desperate decision to forget you. And it didn't work, nothing worked."

Happy ran a hand over his face and turned his head away, but Randi's grip was stronger, almost possessive. "Please Happy, think about giving us another chance and I swear to God that I won't ruin it again."

"We talked about this, Miranda", Happy shot back, but he couldn't deny that he was slowly softening under her pleading gaze. "A long distance relationship? That's not what I want, and neither do you if you're honest with yourself."

Randi let her hands sink, only to place them on his chest, the next words hard for her. But she knew this was her only shot. "What if I stay?"

Happy's gaze shot back to her immediately as the words were spoken, hanging heavy in the air, his scrutinizing gaze studying her. "Are you serious about this? No games, woman."

"No games, I mean it", she promised sincerely, holding her arms up. "I want this, you. And if that's the only way...then so be it."

As soon as she had finished her sentence, Happy's hands flew to her face, holding it tightly in before he pulled her head further down and let his lips crash against hers, the kiss rough and raw but still full of affection.

She found a brief moment to breathe, already panting as she clutched his shirt. "Happyᅳ"

"Just shut up", Happy croaked back, not giving her a chance to doubt the whole thing.

He just wanted to feel her before they'd have the next serious conversation that could change Randi's mind again. But if the accident had taught him one thing, it was that he didn't want to waste any more time.

He wouldn't let Randi leave again.

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