#talking about how it was for Henry's benefit the whole time

[y2ksnowglobe]

Me: *happily relistening to episode eight* Will: Henry definitely got spanked as a kid Me: *slowly turns to look at my mental conception of Barry* Me: Just when I thought I was finally hating you the correct amount...

[mikewheelerlikesboys]

Will Byers has to have powers.

TW: slight mention of SA and grooming, not graphic

This post is going to be a little scrambled, I have a hard time construing my thoughts especially when they’re sort of intricate and long ones so just bear with me.

Will has to have powers, because what other reason would Henry have to kidnap and possess him? Brenner stated that he doesn’t just kill, he consumes, or absorbs. Henry told El he was trying to absorb her powers in Season 3.

We know it was Henry who kidnapped Will and not a Demogorgon because of 2 things

Telekinesis was used to unlock the door, which Demogorgons do not have, nor do they need for this specific act as we’ve seen them bust doors down numerous times.

Will was still alive, Demogorgons are shown to try to kill anyone they come in contact with, immediately, unless being controlled by the hive mind. Will simply would not have been able to survive one alone at his age. It wasn’t luck that he lived so long, it was a plan. He was being kept alive.

So going off of that, what possible reason could Henry have to kidnap a young boy and essentially hold him hostage?

The implications of Henry being a predator and the underlying themes of SA involving him with Will and also El is a whole other thing to get into, I do believe he’s somewhat of a metaphor for SA, given the vines when Will was found and “I felt it everywhere” paired with the scene of the shadow Monster possessing being very violating and him essentially grooming El, but they obviously need a more basic explanation for these things that the general public will understand and be able to swallow more, which is why we have the supernatural plot.

The only logical explanation for him kidnapping Will, holding him hostage, and keeping him alive, is that he was trying to either absorb Wills powers, or keep Will there with him to “join him” like he wanted to do with El.

This obviously doesn’t work because everyone and their mom goes straight to bat for Will and pries him from Henry’s grasp, so then in season 2, he tries a new way of consuming Will, becoming Will. Taking over his mind.

My theory is that by doing this, he was again trying to absorb Wills powers, I’m not exactly sure how yet, but to me it seems to be the only logical explanation for the possession. Henry only started using Will as a spy, or spying back, after he got hurt and realized Will was spying on him first, otherwise I don’t think he would’ve allowed Will to give so much information to everyone and make the drawings of the vines. So the original reason for possession was not to spy.

Then we have Will losing his memory, this shows that Henry is consuming him, he’s consuming his memories in a way, making Will essentially just an empty shell or vessel. It’s unclear if Will remembers the events of when he was possessed, or even if he remembers Bob much afterward. I believe the incident is only brought up 1 time in season 3 (I could be wrong though, please let me know if I am) when Will is talking about how Joyce got it out of him and then El closed the gate. So it’s obvious he knows he was possessed, but it’s unclear whether he remembers the things that happened while he was possessed or not. He also never mentions Bob after his death, we see the drawing on the fridge, but Will never mentions him. We know that in the hospital he forgot who Bob was, so there’s a very real possibility that Henry completely consumed the memories Will had with Bob, causing him to still not remember much of him once the possession is over. This would further prove that Henry was trying to absorb things from Will.

If he can consume memories, through possession, why not powers? He has no reason to want Wills memories after all, that wouldn’t benefit him. But if Will has powers, that would.

It’s only after everyone saved Will AGAIN, that he moves back onto trying to take Els powers in season 3.

So yeah, essentially what I’m yapping about is that if Will doesn’t have powers, there would be no reason for Henry to target him at all, which we know he did from the very beginning and into and throughout season 2, so Will HAS to have some sort of special powers, there’s not really any question about it in my mind, just like Byler it’s the only logical way the story can go.

[firstprincehornyramblings]

hell yeah im finally getting back into my routine.

thank you to @onthewaytosomewhere and @thighzp for the tags. and huge shoutout to everyone being super nice to me about the roommate fic wow, i love yall

i have several wips right now, but i'm fully dedicating myself to two, Angel Henry, and a KissingChambers pwp sex club fic snippets below, with a break cos they might be long?

-------

Angel Henry

“Okay, so indulge me,” Alex spoke, trying not to take his eyes off the road too long as he spoke, “How did you get kicked out of heaven?” “Ah,” this time, Henry looked down at his lap, fiddling with the hem of the towel, “It’s a logical conclusion to come to, no?” “No,” Alex quipped, “But you’re gonna have to forgive me, I haven’t been in church for like a decade.” “Well, that’s not good,” Henry mumbled, looking up and glancing over at Alex, “You should attend fellowship. The Church is his Bride, the mother of humanity.” “Yeah, well, she’s also a whore,” Alex rolled his eyes, “Sorry, not, I’m not trying to be anti-religion, or sexist or… anything,” he sighed, “I just mean, this is Austin. And obviously you’re not from here, and obviously you’re super religious, so I’m really not trying to offend you, but-” he paused, looking at the road as he felt the blond’s eyes locked on him, “This is the kind of place where people constantly use religion to justify their bigotry. Pulling out of context things out of the bible and swearing it means that the marginalized communities don’t deserve rights or to even exist in public. And I’m just… I’m a little bitter about it,” he sighed, tightening his jaw, “It’s hard, even though I was raised religious, and here, to not kind of lump it all in together, if that makes sense.” “I understand,” Henry’s tone sounded empathetic, it made Alex’s shoulders immediately began to relax, “There have always been those who attempt to twist or reframe The Word to benefit themselves. But man has flaws, it’s important to remember that; and to lead with love in places there is none. That is all that’s expected of you. Humanity is fallible and there is suffering in the world, a lot of things here are awful, most of the time. But you? You seem good, Alex, I plead with you not to let them change you; stay good.”   “That was really sweet,” Alex found himself unable to stop from turning his head and looking over at Henry for a moment. By the time he looked back at the road, he whipped to the side, staring again, back at the road, and another stolen glance, “Wait, I didn’t tell you my name. I never told you that.”

Kissingchambers 4.0

“Well, I mean at least you’re just here for the synthetic drugs and not the risky sexual encounters,” Marco nodded with a grin. He sounded playful, there was an air of sarcasm to his voice that Elliot found much more attractive than he anticipated. “I mean, I’m not opposed to a risky sexual encounter, but couples overwhelm me, and they do need to be hot,” Elliot murmured, sipping his drink again. His eyes stayed locked on the other man the entire time, as if willing him to understand the intent of that statement. “Well, of course, no one expects you to hook up with people you think are ugly, obviously,” Marco rolled his eyes with a light chuckle, seeming a bit more comfortable now that he’d found someone to talk to. “Mhm, you’re missing the whole point, aren’t you?” Elliot asked, breaking into a grin. “There’s a point?” Marco blinked, shaking his head, “Of saying you have a type?” “Fuck, I can not be that bad at flirting, I’m saying you’re hot. I rescued you, like a goddamn lost puppy, I bought you a drink, we’re still talking, I’m not that nice, I don’t do charity, I’m calling you hot.” Elliot explained, nodding as he tried not to sneer. “Oh,” Marco blinked, before making a face and half shrugging, “You’re kind of bad at flirting.”

----

yay that was so long. TAG ROUND UP TIME (no obligation lovelies)

@taste-thewaste @henrysfox @mikibwrites @judasofsuburbia

@softboynick @catdadacd @sheepywritesfics @henryspearl

@basil-bird @caressthosecheekbones @henfox @anti-homophobia-cheese

@redlipstickandglitter @eusuntgratie

@thesleepyskipper @tailsbeth-writes @thighzp @lfg1986-2

@bitbybitwrites @midnight-soulless-system

+ literally anyone else; I love reading yall's stuff. <3

[chappcdlips]

(  geraldine viswanathan  .  cis woman  .  she / her  )  .    ⸻  shreya  howe  ,  a  twenty - seven  year  old  ,  has  survived  another  day  in  red  creek  where  they  have  lived  for  their whole life ( besides college )  .  the  gossip  is  known  for being  curious  and  overbearing  and  is  often  associated  with  talking so fast the words run together , naps taken anywhere , music blaring in headphones  .  in  a  small  town  where  they  work  as  a journalist at the register  word  travels  fast  .  it’s  hard  to  keep  a  secret  ,  and  it  looks  like  the  boogeyman  knows  that redacted .

STATS

full name: shreya naomi howe   hometown: red creek, mi   sexuality: queer (really just... into anyone who will give her an abundance of attention)   birthday: august 1   zodiac: leo sun, cancer moon, aries rising  height: 5’6”  languages spoken: english, na'vi (language from avatar (2009)) marital status: single children: none  traits: curious, outgoing, assertive, impatient, overbearing, nosy 

BACKGROUND tw parental death

shreya has no memories of her dad, she used to pretend when she was in kindergarten that she remembered saying her first word and saying it to him, but that was a lie she crafted to make herself feel even remotely better of only knowing him from pictures and stories

she was always an outgoing, loud child, could make friends with anyone and was always the first to reach out to new kids in class or in town; half of this was out of the kindness of her heart and the other half her nagging curiosity to know Everything about everyone

despite chandra's religious preoccupation, she took solace in her mom, going to church with her, following her around to try and keep close, make sure nothing ever happened to her like it did to her dad

she, of course, spent plenty of time bothering her older brother, playing the usual annoying little sister role and always ALWAYS looked up to darshan, he's the closest thing to a father figure she ever had

when she was 11, chandra died after a brief, horrible illness, and shreya wasn't sure if she herself would survive it, but darshan came home and he took care of her and she's not sure if she'll ever be able to repay him for that sacrifice

she covered up her grief with humor and her big personality, always putting on a smile and keeping an appearance of everything being chill and cool

when she graduated high school, she shipped off to ohio university to study journalism, but she knew her path would always lead her back to red creek

she returned and got a job at the register where she is allowed to gossip for a LIVING, which she loves <33

she knew daniela growing up and her disappearance has kinds fucked w her, plus now kirby dying??? she's like what the HELL is going on? beautiful young women are under fire... shreya said EYE could be next??? anyway, she's never been good at handling her grief, so all this violence and sadness in town is definitely not helping!

PERSONALITY AND FUN FACTS

she's friendly! sometimes almost TOO friendly and sometimes it's only because she wants a quote or some scoop for her latest article, but she does have a big heart! lover girl core underneath all the jokes and all the grief

was absolutely the first one to text the group chat when queen elizabeth died and then shot off a series of tweets that probably could get her fired... her henry kissinger death tweets? even more unhinged

curious, just loves to Know things, wants to know everything down to the tiniest detail

probably shouldn't tell her secrets but she loves to be told secrets

she IS a loyal friend though, will not be breaking codes of friendship unless she thinks it could really benefit her career

pretty anti-religion; religion didn't save her mom so now she's kinda like... what the hell @ god? u canNOT be real if all this shit happened to me

big flirt, loves dating and loves The Chase (loves to be chased), but has not had many serious relationships bc that would require emotional vulnerability that she is not equipped for; she LOVES when people are vulnerable to her but cannot reciprocate it

probably a little annoying but in an endearing way

does NOT play about the people she loves, will fight you if you're mean to the people she cares about, fiercely protective

lives with a lot of guilt, mostly in regard to darshan giving up so much to take care of her when their mom passed

has a lot of special interests (na'vi, fantasy novels aka fairy smut, writes fanfiction, lover of wes anderson movies)

sleeps with socks on

has a black cat named chip and he is her baby, her pride and joy

also has a garden in her yard, most of it is dead but neverthless... she persists! (someone come help)

character inspo: velma (scooby doo), liz (shrinking), lois lane (superman), betty (riverdale), lilly (the princess diaries)

[barisistill]

Prompt for you: instead of being stabbed in the ear, Carisi has his face violently slashed open by a hidden weapon. It causes permanent scarring and he is extremely insecure about it, so he won’t let anyone mention it to Barba even though they all think he would benefit from talking to him. He hasn’t talked to him in forever and he’s scared that if Rafael finds out he will think he’s ugly, now. He’s scared of how he will react to the new scarring. He knows it’s bad. Everyone always stares wherever he goes and he can’t handle dragging Barba looking at him and having that same reaction. So nobody tells him, and when Barba comes to New York expecting to be defending a case on the opposite side of the bench, he thinks it’ll be fun to surprise Carisi with his presence there. Maybe an asshole move, sure, but the look on his face will be priceless when he sees him and it will break the ice between him to get sonny off guard. He’ll he pissed, sure, but at least he will be talking to him. And that’s a start, isn’t it? He’s on Sonny’s uninjured side when he walks in, so he doesn’t see the wound, and Sonny won’t even look at him which he wasn’t expecting. It makes him kind of angry, actually, that he isn’t even acknowledging him, even if he knows maybe he deserves that for leaving how he did. But Sonny is perfectly pleasant and polite to everyone else, and raf knows it’s just him getting this treatment. So he says something to try and get a reaction and raise Sonny’s hackles. Something like, “And people say I’m hard to read. You’re more two faced than Harvey Dent.” (If you don’t know, TwoFace/Harvey Dent: That’s a Batman character who has a face injury on one half of his face. RAF means it as a joke about his cold shoulder toward him, thinking he’s being clever about the word play, but Sonny would think it’s a dig at the injury which he assumes raf must know about after all despite his shielding it this whole time)

But Sonny whips around, gut-punched and devastated and Rafael suddenly can’t breathe as he sees the long scar over his face. Fuck. What the fuck had happened to him? Why didn’t anyone call him? Olivia? Rita? Someone? But it’s too late and he realizes how Sonny is going to take that insult and hates himself for it. How the room at large probably understood it to mean. But this isn’t the place to mend fences. He suddenly regrets showing up unannounced and wants nothing more than to take Sonny home and apologize for all of this history between them. The judge is disturbed by the comment but can tell he didn’t mean it like that, or hopes he didn’t, and immediately chastises the word choice before calling a recess. Carisi is out of the room before Barba can even look up again and rushes to chase him down and solve things between them. Where it goes from there…it’s all up to you, if you want to take the prompt 👀

Barba's throwaway quip about Carisi being "two-faced" would have meant nothing if it weren't for the disfigured half of his face. (AKA Henry Mesner ripped open Carisi's face instead of nicking his ear)

you're the absolute best, you get an A+ and a gold star in request submitting ily

[boltlightning]

⭐️ for director's choice, please?

fic director's cut asks!

thank you sm friend!! 💖 taking this opportunity to talk a little about the overarching ideas for so hunts the shrike, which is fresh to mind at the moment :')

really i just wanted an excuse to write elizabeth and norrington 10 years older and wiser and more repressed, but shrike hunt is the culmination of a few ideas that finally came together after years of stewing as individual pieces: elizabeth as an exiled information broker, norrington running back to england after handing over davy jones' heart, a reprisal of the skeleton curse. i was looking at my initial notes for this and the entire original outline reads: "anyway. whatever. elizabeth runs tortuga now, she's a mother, she's learned to be hard. james ran away; he learned to be soft. and now: They Fuck."

aside from a few details that ended up changing, the whole idea remains in tact! this fic is a homage to COTBP with the roles swapped around. elizabeth has been on her own for so long, she doesn't want to involve anyone else; it'll hurt too much when she eventually ruins their life. norrington's been coasting for the last 10 years and doesn't necessarily know what he wants, only that he ran away from war in europe for a reason; he's looking for refuge without realizing it. for once she's the one looking ahead, he's the one living in the present. and it's not really overt, but this time elizabeth is the one expressing interest in norrington rather than the other way around (not that he recognizes it in the narration at all, idiot man).

the one major change is that weatherby swann is still kicking around. originally this was going to adhere a lot more to canon in that gov swann would be dead and elizabeth would have henry, but the scope of the story just wasn't equipped to handle norrington bonding with her son by the man she almost married, yknow? they've got different hurts to wrestle for the moment. plus, selfishly, i don't think elizabeth needed the additional suffering of losing her father on top of raising a son with no support network. it's my au and gov swann can hang out and drink wine and dote like he was always meant to do.

the entire fic is a treatise on how well norrington knows the swanns as people, even all these years later. the love is still there, and all the hurt has been blunted, but not erased. they have the benefit of hindsight now! and being fully grown and weathered adults! they all can lean back on those old friendships. there's so much intimacy in things like remembering how someone takes their tea, or holding onto an inside joke all these years later. while i'm very proud of how tight this fic is, i do regret not lingering more in the domestic circumstances i spent so much time setting up. i barely exploited the fake marriage of it all. smh. that's what spin-offs of the au are for i suppose!

finally, leaving you with a cut bit with a reference that was too on the nose even for my tastes:

“James…” Elizabeth draws herself up more fully. “I didn’t tell you this with the intention of asking for your help. But if I know you—” “You know you don’t need to ask.” He lifts his hand to his chest. “What do you need of me?” “I don’t—" “It is no imposition. I would run mad without an occupation, truth be told,” he says, and is surprised to find he means it.

[binuwe]

I'm currently watching Oniisama e, and I've a lot of thoughts regarding this anime. One of those is the outrageous role of Henmi in this saphic story, like, why is he even here? At a certain moment, I genuinely believed he was going to be just a second character who Nanako wrote to... I was so wrong, and partially disappointed.

In episode 24, I believe, it's revealed the reason why Fukiko behaves the way she does in front of this man (this woman never ceases to impress me). And such reason is so boring and dull. I was expecting a parallel between these two older siblings, how both their fathers betrayed their mothers by having an affair, how they both have step sisters, and how they managed these events. We are pretty aware of the mistreatment and manipulation Fukiko treats Rei (Saint Juste) with, meanwhile Henri is patient and sweet with Nanako. Since Henri is close friends with Fukiko's brother (neither I can stand this man), it may have occurred that he had noticed this awful treatment against Rei. Henri could have called her out, confessing his similar situation.

In the first episode, in the first scene, it is shown how Henri meets Nanako. Correct me if I'm wrong, but they never get to explain what exactly he was doing there (aside from seeing from afar the father that abandoned him). There's an important detail one mustn't overlook: his reaction to Nanako. Why did he act the way he did? I began to elaborate a posible, and very dramatic, come out.

So, having in mind we want to make parallels Fukiko-Henri, we need to establish what differentiates them: their relationship with their sisters. In episode 26 (I believe), it's revealed the sickening root from where Fukiko and Rei's relationship comes from. Fukiko uses Rei to upgrade herself, to feel superior, using a lone kid for her benefit. She saw Rei as an instrument she could use to "expire her sins", that inner facade nobody else could see. Meanwhile, she lost the possibility of bonding with Rei on an equal basis. She lost the possibility of having a sister.

Here is where Henmi could have been different with Fukiko. Although in their first meet, Henri hadn't seen the older Nanako yet, his previous encounter with her is enough to set a difference. So, again, what was Henri exactly doing there? Henri couldn't have been older than 12-13 years old when he first saw Nanako. His father abandoned him and his mother so he could live with his new family. He must have felt betrayed, he must have wanted answers, he might have even searched for revenge. He was replaced by a younger child, much weaker than himself, it wouldn't have been difficult to get her out of the way. (On various occasions, this story shows how teenagers seek drastic solutions for drastic situations.) Now, when he arrived to execute his plan, after the sight of his poor victim, he realised the wrong in his actions. How could he inflict pain on a poor girl just to make himself feel better?

Fukiko wouldn't react well to Henri's ethics lesson, creating a palpable conflict between the two characters. At the same time, it would have created a parallel between Rei and Nanako, for they are the object of their sibling's conflict. Helping to create a richer dynamic between them.

Now, the sad reality is much boring. I guess what actually happens, happens, with the intention of making Fukiko childish (and dramatic, as everyone else in this show). Which she is, don't take me wrong, but this was the worst scenario ever. It also makes Henri a kind of god for these mentally unstable teenage girls. It makes the whole story orbit around him (I'm not even going to talk about the atrocious end because, yes, I've spoiled myself)... WHY? Why has the postgraduate man have to be the reason behind the existence of the plot? I know the title literally means "Dear Brother," but come on! Men always ruin everything, in Mariko we trust.

[arcane-vagabond]

Do you know what? I've been thinking and I am really interested in how you think Jake's shopping for clothes with Uncle Walter went. What did they talk about? Did Uncle Walter covertly quiz him to see if he was worthy of Scout and Scout's father's watch, or did he simply want to get to know his future nephew-in-law better? Was Jake nervous the whole way through or did he get more comfortable over time? Did he manage to knock everyone off their feet with his natural charm? Only if you want to answer, don't feel any pressure! Also, I am so, so, so sorry for not saying this before, but congratulations on 500 followers!!!

WOW this has been sitting here forever, but here I am....tackling the 100+ messages in this damn askbox. So, sorry it took me a while to get to this, Nonny! I hope you're still around!

I'll put this below a cut since it's a little long now...

DGU!Jake, my beloved. That boy was SO nervous, okay? He wanted to make a good impression because this was Scout's family we're talking about. The closest thing she has to living parents. They're classy, sophisticated, and born in high society. They're everything Jake isn't, and he knows it. Sure, they've been kind to him since he arrived, but who's to say that isn't for Scout's benefit?

What he doesn't know is that Benji had sent his aunt and uncle letters over the past few months detailing life out west and the inexplicable fascination this young ne'erdowell has with his baby sister. So, Aunt Josephine and Uncle Walter are very familiar with Jake before he even arrives.

I think Uncle Walter was definitely interested in getting to see the type of man Jake is for himself. Scout is like another child to him, so he's very protective over her and wants only the best for her. He was never too keen on Henry, but his late brother-in-law was excited for the match, so he bit his tongue. But now? Well, he saw how Jake and Scout look at each other, and some snot-nosed bully is not going to do no matter how wealthy he is.

Uncle Walter took the reins during their shopping trip, and made note of every time Jake thanked the staff there or moved out of the way for the bustling workers - something none of the high society men in the shop were doing themselves. He also took note of the calluses on Jake's hands, another stark contrast to the softer hands of the elite. Uncle Walter saw the way Jake's eyes drifted towards the fine silks of the scarves and handkerchiefs, something like regret shining in his green eyes as he grimaced. He noticed as a gaggle of young ladies watched him with coy smiles on their lips, the blond man paying them no mind except to nod at them politely.

"Benji tells us you've been hard at work on the ranch," he offers. Jake looks at him, surprise coloring his features before he nods.

"Yes, sir."

"He also tells us that Scout has been hard at work with the chores around the house and barn, as well."

Jake's expression softens at the mention of Walter's niece, a hint of a smile on his lips.

"She works too hard," he replies, turning his attention to the different fabrics. "She'll keel over one day."

"You think she's not capable of hard work?" Walter asks, a hint of amusement in his tone. Jake's eyes widen at his words, his head whipping around to look at the older man as panic fills his features.

"No!" Jake exclaims. "No, that's not what I meant at all. It's just-"

He blows out a breath, running a hand through his short locks.

"She's stubborn, and she doesn't like to ask for help. I know she can do it, but she doesn't need to do it all alone. She shouldn't have to, not if I'm there to help her."

Walter stares at the young man for a moment, letting his words sink in. With his decision made, he claps Jake on the shoulder, putting on a good natured smile.

"Come along," he says, leading the young man towards the counter. "It's time we should be heading back.

[lesbiansayaishii]

what are your currents wips!? <3

hi anon! mostly i'm writing for meddison right now, so i'll give you those wips. edit: this got very long so my wips are under the cut <3

lately she's undressing for revenge. i currently have 3 parts out of this fic! the basic premise is addison walks into meredith's life and suddenly her relationship is ruined because her boyfriend didn't bother to tell her that he had a wife. so meredith drops him in a turmoil of feelings and seduces addison to get back at him. and, well, if they happen to fall in love... isn't that the ultimate fuck you?

neighbor au. this one doesn't have a title yet, and it's BARELY a wip with how much time i've had to work on it lately, but it's really kind of an au where one tiny thing is changed in canon and the butterfly effect of what happens because of it- namely derek divorces addison before he runs to seattle in season 1, so when addison shows up in seattle (with henry) in season 18 and moves into the house next to meredith's, they have no idea about the connection between them. slightly crack-y events ensue as well as some very fun, very sexy milf action because really. this is me we're talking about. (it's partially based on my therapist told me by xana if you wanna check that out!!)

sad christmas fic. this is from the mentioned christmas part in chapter 3 of revenge. that's all i'm gonna say about that.

bloomington au. this is based on the sapphic professor/student movie bloomington! the main characters SCREAMED meddison to me as i was watching it so i took notes and somehow it devolved into a whole au. whoops.

elevate me songfic. so um. fun fact about me i hate nick marsh? especially with meredith? so in very me fashion i decided to take the song that played over their first sex scene and make it into a season 18 meddison au. because honestly the whole nick storyline SCREAMS meddison the second time around. the meeting again after a long period of time, the instant rekindling of infatuation, the way they would drop anything for one another, etc. you get it. this one is probably a two parter but i'm excited for it especially since i was just talking about it with @walshies earlier. it's going to be very self indulgent and everything we wished was true about meddison the second time around <3

an addison-centric fic about her early life > relationship with derek > relationship with mark > relationship with meredith <3 i haven't decided whether or not i want to include the events from private practice into this fic yet but i suppose we will see what happens when i have more time lol.

carol au. planned this one out with @thenightmaredrowns! it's based on the movie carol (as was a bit obvious) we have it mostly figured out we just have to... actually write it. in our spare time.

bonus random assorted fics i haven't thought about in a bit:

series rewrite but meddison is cheating on derek through the entire show

a fic set to enchanted by taylor swift. set before in the heat of your electric touch (i want to need you forever)

season 6 au, meddison adopts zola

a fic set to maroon by taylor swift

friends with benefits meddison

a fic set to shivers by ed sheeran (this one has no plot. it's a single scene lol)

[swanqueensalad]

okay top 3 cute sq headcanons that you have right now and top 3 more angsty sq headcanons you have right now?

thank you for this anon!!! i love doing these <33

cute:

emma is actually so dad vibes she falls asleep on the couch every night the minute she, regina and henry start watching netflix. she kicks up such a fuss about what they watch then just straight up passes out. henry always complains and makes fun of her, but regina (though she would never say it) really likes it. it makes her feel very warm and safe and comforted to be snuggled up on emma's chest watching tv, feeling her breath rise and fall, listening to her silly occasional snores. because even asleep, emma never stops holding her. (and then emma wakes up at the end of the episode or the movie and insists she wasn't asleep and saw the whole thing)

every saturday morning, regina mills has a baking session. she is basically a pinterest mom who also is obsessed with organizing and scheduling, and baking is a hobby that benefits everyone, so it becomes part of her routine. emma is gradually learning to help: this means being annoying in the kitchen, eating ingredients, giving regina cuddles and neck kisses when she's trying to do something, and singing along badly to the music on the radio. though regina pretends to be annoyed, she secretly loves it. after henry grew out of helping her, she always baked alone until emma, and rarely got much joy out of it. now it's one of her favourite parts of the week. simple, peaceful, and happy. (and every time she bakes with emma and then they eat some of the freshly cooled goods together, it undoes cora's voice in the back of her head a little bit, every week her questionable relationship with food gets a little bit better)

as much as emma loves storybrooke, she sometimes misses the outside world, and so another tradition that develops is emma taking regina for date days out of town. they'll pick random towns, forests to hike in, and places to visit and take a leisurely drive, stop for food somewhere. for a while emma gets weirdly obsessed with weird thrift/antique stores and finding the dumbest stuff she can (regina and henry, when he hears, both tease her for 'keeping some Mr Gold genes after being the Dark One') and while regina makes fun, she secretly loves leafing through antique books and reading inscriptions left in them. also, whenever they speak to waitresses or shopkeepers on these outings, they have to make up different stories about how they met. every time, emma comes up with a different story and makes it as rambling and silly as possible, and every time regina smiles and shakes her head and sometimes inputs something funny that comes to mind.

angsty:

i've def spoken about this one before, but regina has nightmares very regularly. multiple times a week, about various things from her past (god knows there's enough nightmare fuel). emma is a light sleeper and lifelong insomniac herself for many reasons, and if she is asleep, she wakes up very quickly when she hears the familiar change in regina's breathing, or feels her lashing out with her hands or feet in her sleep. it aches deep in emma's chest every time, knowing there are things that have happened that will always haunt regina like this, knowing there are some things she can't fight off. and she's still learning what to do with those things, how to help her without a sword and fist, but she wakes her as gently as she can and kisses her forehead, strokes her hair and whispers silly things and dumb jokes to her until they're both okay. regina doesn't like to talk about her nightmares or what they contain, and emma doesn't ask. they just hold each other and learn to feel safe.

idk if this is a controversial one, or if my view of them has just changed a little as i've gotten older, but emma and regina are both people that are still struggling big time with their mental health, processing, healing etc and though they love each other and are definitely on a one way path to peace, there's no way this doesn't cause issues sometimes. when regina and emma fight (beyond the everyday quibbling that undoubtedly means i love you), they fight badly. they both say awful stuff they don't mean or believe. they both spiral. (but afterwards, when they've calmed down and the dust has settled, they always find each other with immense apology and understanding. and the good thing is, because they both struggle, they both understand wholeheartedly what the other one went through, why they said those things, and they know unequivocally that they didn't mean them. their fights are not common, but after them they are always extra caring and tender and honest with each other, just to be sure the other knows how much they are loved.)

this is more sad than actually angsty, but it means a lot to me so. i have forgotten if this is actually canon or not, but regina had a version of daniel's tombstone brought over to storybrooke with the curse and it is still very important to her to visit it regularly, bringing his favourite yellow flowers. emma respects her privacy and that it's a very personal thing, but one day when emma asks where she's going and she says there, regina tells her very gently that she's welcome to come if she'd like. and so emma, after making sure it's not overstepping any boundaries, joins. she is quiet and respectful, holds regina's hand and sits with her there. after a while regina turns to her and tells her how much he would have liked her. how similar they are, in some ways. how totally not in others. before they go, when regina has already left, emma pretends to have forgotten something so she can have a quick moment to touch the stone and tell him a quiet thank you, for loving regina and taking care of her before she could.

[politelymenacing]

If they're not doing a reboot where they're married, and Henry gets to live happily in England with his two dads and go to a better school than he could go to Kansas???? then why are they showing us this?

APPLE TV EXPLAIN!!

Is that not what happened....?

Must've just been in my head, damn. 😛

OK. Here is my pitch to Apple to make it happen (because is just makes sense):

Why do the bit about Henry acting out and bullying a kid?

Why have Henry failing science (scandal!)?

To me, that should have nudged them in the direction of 'maybe he would be better at a new school in England?' rather than 'he'll be fine just as soon as Ted returns to Kansas'.

Then we have the whole Dr. Jacob of it all... they were clearly hinting at his and Michelle's relationship breaking down (thank god. I can't even go into how much that angered me). To me, that was freeing her of her ties to Kansas so she could move with Henry to England. But instead they just kind of maybe left it a bit ambiguous. Are we supposed to believe that Ted and Michelle would ever get back together? Because no.

Also, it was clear that Henry didn't really like him and would benefit from being closer to his Uncle Beard (ugh that bit outside of the pub with them two absolutely got me 😭)

There's also Dottie. Now, I will admit that that episode fucked me up a little (yay, mums...), so I have only rewatched it once, but if I were Ted her attempt at manipulation would have just made me want to get Henry away from her, so even more reason to bring him to England.

Now Ted:

He's doing better. Ok, not amazing, but he is getting regualr thearapy and he can control his panic attacks

He knows the offside rule. He (re)invents Total Football. He is finally understanding the sport he came over to coach.

He is starting to use British terminology for things! He's acclimatised! Honestly, if he'd been there any longer, he'd have been drinking tea.

They specifically show him interacting with his neighbours and the community.

And then you tear him away from all of that. It is beyond cruel.

Also, even though Sassy was not right for him at all, he was maybe starting to show that he could move on from Michelle and let someone else into his life. (I do not have enough time to lay out the Bi Ted agenda, I'm sure people have done excellent metas about it, but let's just say the Bi Triangles will haunt me forever.)

Which leads us to Trent.

I am definitely missing things because I'm just rattling this off the top of my head, but:

Are we just going to forget that Trent got fired for Ted? And then following his bliss lead him straight to Richmond to write a love letter book about Ted.

What was the whole thing about the right idea just sitting behind a couple of the wrong ones?? In the red string of fate episode, no less!

Whatever was going in during Girl Talk with Rebecca.

Why did Ted tell Henry that it was "good to have people in your life that are excited to be around you" literally the episode after Trent was SO EXCITED about Total Football and how Ted got them there. Like. Seriously.

TRENT’S LITTLE FINGER STICKING OUT IN THE RED STRING OF FATE BIT THAT WAS POINTING DIRECTLY TO THE RED STRIPES ON TED'S JACKET ahem.

Trenthouse magazine. TRENTHOUSE MAGAZINE.

The Robert Redford/Dustin Hoffman thing. Followed by a sodding wink.

And then there's the fact they are both middle aged single dads who have so much baggage. They get one another.

Finally. Because this is turning into a bloody essay. The ending. Ted was FOR SURE asleep and dreaming at the end. I don't give a fuck what Brendan said.

You can't get that close to Stonehenge, it all looked too fake, there's no way Ted wouldn't be there, Jane needs to get in the bin.

How did Sam manage to get into the Nigerian team? (Don't get me wrong, I desperately wanted that for him, but it seemed like it was never going to happen??)

Ted thinks Trent will agree to change the book's title, and even dreams up someone he knows (Shannon) to get a copy singed.

OH AND THE GLASSES. Trent has new glasses. Why? Because Ted doesn't want to imagine him with the ones from before because the first thing he said to Trent was a compliment about the glasses.

Basically, what I'm saying. Is that that is what makes most sense from the ending. HOWEVER, Apple TV, if you are convinced it was all real, here are some ways you can keep that ending (more or less) and still have the Romcommunism ending we deserved that will lead to you picking up this reboot idea:

Ted goes back, gets a final copy of The Richmond Way, the dedication says something about how Trent changed the title because he asked, but it was always about Ted, of course it was. Ted realises his huge mistake. (Maybe he goes to rush to the airport, only to find Trent standing outside his door.)

Trent didn't say goodbye to Ted because he was already on a flight to Kansas to wait for him with a sign that says 'Coach Lasso from England". (OK, this doesn't quite fit with the ending, but you know it's a cute AF idea so shhh)

Trent is singing copies of his book and asks who it's for without looking up and just here's Ted say his name.

In all these scenarios someone says "Is this a fucking joke?" END.

And now you are ready to start your spin off/reboot/series 4 with the footage of Jason and Jimmy at the Emmys. You're welcome.

You can have all of these ideas for free (plus whatever other headcanons you get out of me), Apple TV, if you let me play one of the minimal acting required background players in the AFC Richmond Women's team (Because that is a part of the finale i can get behind and I have credentials if you need to verify I can actually play)

[inkdemonapologist]

Who's your favorite female character in BATIM? Also, what do you think about Audrey as a character (aside from the weird stuff about Joey and "you don't have to be like this" that you mentioned in that one post)? You draw her really well.

Aw, thank you! And MAN that’s a tough question……

Dot and Abby and Susie are my personal stack of favs. Dot’s probably the one where I like her personality as-written the most, since Abby I find difficult to summarise beyond “she’s gender” and loving her friendship with her besties in TIOL (and also getting my heart destroyed after seeing her and Joey interact in DCTL). Abby seems like a delight to interact with and I enjoy that she’s a little bit rude at heart but in a “omg its true but u shouldn’t say it lmao” sort of way, and I get the sense that she and Joey kind of enabled each other when they were younger. I’d love to hear more of her art opinions. I would say I’d get in a fight with her about Monet, but I don’t think she’d even give me the honour of an argument.

We as a fandom have spent a lot of time yelling about how Buddy is clearly autistic and I don’t think we spend NEAR enough time talking about how Dot is clearly autistic as well. I really like the contrast between the two of them through that lens; Buddy has never understood an unstated implication in his life and he’s not about to start now, but badly wants to interact the way he’s expected to, whereas Dot is incredibly intuitive, perceptive, and understands subtext but has no time for it frankly and would rather be direct than conventional. A day after meeting Buddy she’s explaining how conversations work and coaching Buddy on how to ask questions even when he’s being guided away from asking questions, which is definitely a normal way to converse. I love her so much.

Meanwhile Susie is so complicated by virtue of having almost no presence in the books – just the games, where her timeline is one of the most up in the air, her writing is hit or miss, and so so much of her personality is in the gaps between audiologs that, like most in-game BatIMs, means no two fandom Susies are the same. I find her really compelling, though, exploring the character to find that sweet spot between someone who is clearly very charming and cheerful and sweet and sympathetic, but also cruel enough to become Malice, entitled and demanding enough to not take “no” for an answer and to simply decide that Alice should get to be hers forever. I’ve said before that I like to imagine that’s what Sammy saw in her, someone who could somehow be simultaneously thoughtful and optimistic and ruthlessly ambitious. I think she’s neat, but also I love her best when she’s not just sweet and not just horrible.

Anyway, Audrey’s a fun character with a lot of pretty believable emotional responses; when scenes are taken individually, I like her. Grain of salt that I haven’t watched the whole game, I’ve just seen some big moments and cutscenes, SO I COULD BE WAY OFF HERE -- but from what I've seen, while it’s tempting to say she has more personality than her predecessor, I’d be hard-pressed to pin down exactly what that personality is.

I don’t think it was intentional, but Henry’s weary compartmentalisation soaked into every comment he made, even when the things he was saying were deliriously strange (“[survives a deadly supernatural ordeal] huh, looks like I need 3 gears here”). We all made headcanons about how he’s either tired from the loops or selectively mute or just trying not to think about the horrors, and it felt like it worked. But Audrey is tough to really pin down a motivating force for, as if she’s defined by static descriptors like “determined” and “kind” rather than any particular desire like “wants to help” or “wants to stay out of trouble” that might spur her to make decisions based on those desires. Her most consistent character trait is giving others the benefit of the doubt (and constantly getting burned for it) and her most reinforced motivation is that she just wants to not be in the confusing dangerous weird ink place, which, like, same! I WOULDNT WANT TO BE THERE EITHER

She sounds bitter when Joey compares her to a father she never knew, which is an expected and reasonable response on its own that feels right in the moment – but when we look at her timeline (or the Archive’s revelation that she repressed her memories of her father AFTER Joey’s death), it’s actually a sort of difficult reaction to make sense of. I feel like a lot of her reactions are like this, especially near the end; they’re not that weird in the moment, but it’s hard to get a sense of why she’s doing these things or what’s led her to the conclusions she comes to. She defends Wilson to Allison, but like… what led her to believe that he’s legit? We can fill in those blanks with headcanons, of course, but we don’t have strong clues. Is it her having sympathy for him now that she “knows” he’s trying to save his father, or does she think it’s her best shot to get out of here, or does she really believe Wilson is going to fix everything despite everything else she’s seen? Do her chat with Henry and the revelation that Baby Bendy and the Ink Demon are one and the same just not affect her decision-making at all here? Or is killing Baby Bendy just a sacrifice she’s immediately willing to make once she realises that? What ARE Audrey’s feelings on her father and at what point does she remember him? Audrey giving Allison her name is a nice subtle indication that she’s started to accept that Joey’s story might be true, which I genuinely like, but it’s weird that we see her doing that right before insisting that she’s gonna go off and hear Wilson out – we get this indication that she’s started believing Joey, but apparently not enough to decide to try to fix the cycle, not enough to put together that the “wicked creatures who never came from my pen” might be the Keepers that she knows answer directly to Wilson. She’s determined to help Wilson so that she can get out of there, and only after that extremely fails does she decide to try to fix the broken cycle. (Honestly, it would’ve been kinda neat if she HAD in fact been selfishly helping Wilson as a “well, sucks for you guys, but I gotta get home,” and then Joey’s insistence that we always have a chance to make a better choice would actually mean something and inform her decision to take the Reel as more than just “well I guess this is the option that I have left.”)

Anyway, DESPITE THIS CRITICAL PARAGRAPH this is all fine for a player character who basically just needs to go from task to task; I think she’s likeable and I enjoy her interactions. But it does feel like a lot of times she’s just doing the next thing she’s been handed, to me, and it’s harder to make that a part of her personality than it was for Henry. It’d be neat to see a little more of Joey in Joey Drew’s daughter.

[scotianostra]

June 7th 1329 saw the death of our most famous King, Robert I, "The Bruce".

Much has been said about King Robert and his prowess in battle, I'll try and highlight some of his other traits and how it was he who was first given the no de plume Braveheart.

The Bruce is said to have spoken several languages, Scots, Gaelic, Latin, and Norman French, and was an avid reader who loved studying the lives of previous monarchs. According to a parliamentary brief from around 1364, Robert the Bruce "used continually to read, or have read in his presence, the histories of ancient kings and princes, and how they conducted themselves in their times, both in wartime and in peacetime.” In his free time, he would recite tales from history, with the likes of Charlemagne and Hannibal being two of his favourite subjects he shared.

Robert the Bruce’s physician, Maino de Maineri, criticized the king’s penchant for devouring eels. “I am certain that this fish should not be eaten because I have seen it during the time I was with the king of the Scots, Robert Bruce, who risked many dangers by eating [moray eels], which are by nature like lampreys," de Maineri wrote "It is true that these [morays] were caught in muddy and corrupt waters.” (Notably, overeating eels was considered the cause of King Henry I England’s death.)

Treasure hunters speculate that in the 14th century, the Knights Templar fled to Scotland with a trove of valuables because they received support and protection from King Robert the Bruce. Thanks to his help, they say, the Knights were able to hide gold and holy relics—from ancient Gospel scrolls to the Holy Grail—in secret spots across the country, including in Rosslyn Chapel and it's not just through the Da Vinci Code, I remember my mum talking about the Holy Grail possibly being hidden within the Apprentice Pillar.

After the death of his second wife, Elizabeth de Burgh, Robert the Bruce decreed to give the Auld Kirk in Cullen, Scotland—now the Cullen and Deskford Parish—a total of five Scots pounds every year. That's because, in 1327, Elizabeth had died after falling off a horse, and the local congregation generously took care of her remains. Robert was so touched by the gesture that he promised to donate money “for all eternity.” To this day, his bequest is still paid to the kirk.

The Kirk was not the only thing to benefit from The Bruce. He moved about Scotland he was a frequent visitor to Aberdeen , his first arrival being in 1306.

In the month of September 1319, King Robert, had again visited the city, where he stayed for some time, lodging in William the Lion's Palace in the Green.

The citizens of Aberdeen , many of whom were his former comrades-in-arms, gave Bruce a tremendous welcome. The King went south well pleased with the reception he had received, and at a Parliament in Berwick on 10th December 1319 , made his most generous benefaction to Aberdeen . He gave the burgesses in perpetual feu, and for a nominal payment of £213:6/8d, the whole of the Stocket Forest . From this remarkable gift the city's ‘Common Good Fund' may be said to have originated. The fund has accumulated over the years and has assets worth millions of pounds; the cities citizens still enjoy the benefits to this very day.

The Bruce died just a month before his 55th birthday, about the same age I am just now. The cause of his death has been a source of much discussion, and disagreement, but most modern scholars believe that he succumbed to leprosy. His funeral was a rather elaborate affair that required nearly 7000 pounds of candle wax just for the funerary candles. Following the fashion for royalty, he was buried in multiple places. His chest was sawed open and his heart and internal organs removed: The guts were buried near his death-place at the Manor of Cardross, near Dumbarton; his corpse interred in Dunfermline Abbey; and his heart placed inside a metal urn to be worn around the neck of Sir James Douglas, who promised to take it to the Holy Lord. The reason his guts were taken and buried first was to stop the rest of the corpse did not rot before it's "spiritual" burial at the Abbey in Dunfermline.

Unfortunately, Sir Douglas never made it to the Holy Land: He got sidetracked and took a detour to fight the Moors in Spain, where he was killed. Before his attackers reached him, Douglas reportedly threw the urn containing the king’s heart and yelled “Lead on brave heart, I’ll follow thee.” The heart was later returned to Scotland and it was not until 1921 it was rediscovered on an archaeological dig at Melrose Abbey. The Casket was opened to find the mummified heart, it was photographed at the time, but I can't find these pics online, however it was unearthed again in 1996.

After the casket had been fully examined, several different ideas were put forward about what should happen to it next. There were some suggestions of sending the casket to the National Museum of Scotland, or creating a new museum for the heart at Melrose Abbey.

In the end, in accordance with Scots Law and respect for the dead, the casket was enclosed inside a time capsule, and reburied in a private ceremony.

Although this heart hasn't 100% been proven to be that of King Robert it doesn't really matter. The casket and the heart are symbols of the man himself and shall always remain so.

[ashadowofburnedoutstardust]

I was thinking about Buzz Lightyear and how the mood/tone in the fandom seemed to change substantially afterwards, even the slap at the Oscars that interrupted the whole Buzz being advertised midshow......were they former scientologists?

I mean wedding news of one of Buzz lightyears lead stars would have been good promo after all, no wonder they kept it secret, a real couple would actually keep things private

Not to mention Christopher commenting on Taika & Rita's scare video later on and I quote "I support this", you know, a POC couple, one of whom is actually Jewish....

It's weird that all of his projects have immediately tanked since then, you know after he tweeted support for the LGBTQ scene to be included

Weird how those reviews for Ghosted got published before anyone had even had time to see the movie basically one starting them pre-emptively, like they were already written and ready to go?

Weird how all of that keeps happening huh???

It makes me wonder if some homophobic shit further up in the Disney ranks that doesn't like the idea of paying people what they are worth and respecting their rights as people (let's not brush over the fact that half the Marvel stars have not been able to speak out and Clark Gregg is currently making submissions for the NO FAKES act)

Disney are the big AI likeness argument with the SagAftra strikes right now, and the big stars aren't speaking up.......more than likely being prevented from speaking up due to the fact they still have a contract with them..... because if Christopher still had a platform to use and seeing as he's not under the Disney umbrella or contracted to them any longer, you can bet your a$$ he would be doing so just like he did with Trump, hence we have Clark Gregg making legal submissions, I wonder who else might come out soon......

Is this Buzz Lightyear "failure" how he ended up getting pushed into this contract with Netflix to push for support for a show renewal that also ended up failing?

CAA can't claim to have not known about her and her past, they're the ones that took her out on loan from UTA and did the cleaning on her racist BS

Weird how CAA entered into a deal with Francois-Henri Pinault to purchase a major stake in their company just days before the "soft launch" of a fake wedding, PR distraction tactic yet again? Yes

If they don't have any clients lefts to keep on their books they don't have a product to sell for a profit, no wonder they have Bryan Lourd in there doing the negotiations (which he shouldn't be and is highly inappropriate conduct on their behalf, he's not there for the benefit of the actors)

Though I will say, I'm glad my "summoning spell" worked so well to have Christopher show up at the con, you are very welcome for the suggestions, good to see you can read but apparently not catch the references

If it's a real marriage his agency and PR firm have nothing to worry about, but if it isn't, he now has them on coercion and possibly blackmail

Ain't that a kick in the head?

🤍✨🪽

[onyxbird]

Got around to watching Damsel (2024), and overall enjoyed it and thought they did a lot of interesting stuff.

Detailed thoughts (and major spoilers) below the cut.

Aesthetically, I really like the dragon design. It clearly conveyed "dragon" in overall shape and behavior, but with a novel spin that did not look like a giant lizard with wings or closely based on any other real animal, but a different type of creature entirely. Its level of agility felt believable for that body shape, and also think not having it closely resemble any real animals gives a lot more freedom to use facial expressions/speaking without it looking really weird.

I also thought they did a good job of foreshadowing some of the developments, e.g., during the first scene with the old-timey king, the visuals were too obscured to see what was actually going on, but the sound effects, etc., were enough to make me suspect (but not be certain) that they'd killed baby dragons. And the apparent route out on the map? It would be a really selfless princess to get all the way to the exit and then go back to update the map for future girls.

The prehensile tail was particularly brilliant, because it added a completely new danger/dynamic to dealing with the dragon that isn't part of the standard pattern. I also liked that the egg fluids surrounding the hatchlings looked like molten gold--that feels like there was some worldbuilding about the typical link between dragons and gold going on there that just wasn't relevant to the current story.

(Also, for some reason I did not expect this dragon to talk! Even though they'd said they made a deal with the dragon, I was still shocked when she spoke to Elodie for the first time.)

There are a few aspects that I'm kind of side-eyeing.

1) The dragon claims to know that the princesses are from the royal family due to the smell of their blood, and that's supposed to be entirely from the little bit of Henry's blood that got transferred over by pressing their cuts together? I don't recall any indication that the humans can perform magic, but that plot point only works if 1) the ritual literally transforms all of the princesses' blood into "royal blood" identifiable by smell (Elodie bled a lot more than that cut while the dragon's caves, so that smell should have been clear) or 2) the dragon has never figured out that all she's smelling is human blood, despite seeming to understand that there are "royal" and "non-royal" humans.

3) While I'm all for the dragon and Elodie teaming up to eliminate their mutual enemy, is Elodie seriously bringing her home with them? Yes, the dragon was horribly wronged, but not only did she demand to murder young women who were not responsible for killing her babies (in huge numbers given this has been continuing for centuries), she also made it clear that them dying too quickly is disappointing and she wants to hunt them slowly and maximize the physical and psychological torment. I.e., whatever she says about making the royals feel her pain, that's not what she's actually prioritizing--the people sacrificing the girls dump them into the pit, walk away, and move on with their lives, never having to know what actually happens once they're down there or how quickly or slowly they die; everything after that is gratuitous torture of the princesses, i.e., the ones standing in for the babies she is supposedly avenging. Elodie seems to forgive and forget awfully quickly.

2) The royal family of Aurea seems awfully big on depictions of dragons (e.g., the gigantic dragon sculptures at the harbor entrance) considering that the one that lives on their island hates their guts and the deal seemed to be purely "regular sacrifices in exchange for the dragon not burning your whole kingdom down" without any other dragon-provided benefits, which doesn't seem particularly endearing--even if the Aurean royalty has no moral qualms about the human sacrifice whatsover, it's got to be expensive between finding the candidates from faraway lands, throwing the fancy weddings, and paying apparently-large bride prices for the girls they're just going to sacrifice the next day.

(I'm also curious what the timing is on the sacrifices--my guess was every generation, and that works if they have a male heir to marry off to three sacrifices and then marry a "real" spouse, but what if they only have girls for a generation? Same-sex marriage? Have at least four daughters and actually sacrifice their own that generation? Do the royal-blood stunt on some random boy and make him an adopted prince long enough to marry and sacrifice three princesses?)

[awkwardturtletrash]

An egregious rant about celebrity culture and I am not even sorry

I feel like I'm going insane, I want to claw my eyes out and eat my phone and burn every cord I have in my house. How is everyone okay with celebrities? The concept? The payoff? The whole fucking charade of these people? They're not real anymore, these aren't genuine connections, this is the most dystopian existence I can imagine and you're all just fucking eating it up???

There is not fucking benefit to these people being in my face 24/7 ??? I cannot find a single piece of genuine emotion besides annoyance and anger whenever I see the same fucking picture of Kim Kardashian (I had to fucking google the spelling) in that dumb pink shirt and everyone losing their mind that she incorrectly styled a piece of clothing that they will never touch in their god damn lives. It's the most insane, mindless, pointless use of an existence I've ever seen. Why are you all so fucking obsessed with the CONCEPT of people? She has a stylist. She has a whole team. She doesn't do her makeup or hair or outfits or accessories. You are following this handcrafted existence, this portfolio of makeup and cloth and you just??? (This is not a personal attack on Kim Kardashian, as much as I do not care about her life this is not her fault and I do not want it to seem this is a rant against any specific human, they are still people and cannot control society as a whole.) Fucking do it day in and day out? You genuinely care about who Taylor Swift is dating or if John Mulaney got Petunia in the divorce or if Zendaya is engaged or if Henry Cavil's hairline is bad now or if Kendal Jenner can walk well or if Jenner Lawerence got face work done???

(And don't say you don't "genuinely" care when you spend HOURS online tweeting about it and talking about it to your friends in person and 'finally getting into football lol' over a single woman who went to a single game and hung out with a single guy. You put in the hours, you are pathetically genuine.)

What fucking purpose is there? What benefit? The world is in fucking shambles and you bitches have stan accounts dedicated to an actor??? Where does the self come in? Your own life? I cannot pity anyone more than someone who so desperately needs to know Ryan Reynolds's favorite color or what Bella Hadid eats in a day. Did I sometimes watch these kinds of videos, seeing famous people describe mundane stories or do the most boring secret talent? Yes...In middle school. Something clicked one day that every interview is a job, that this is an advertisement, that they are selling themselves as a byproduct of a film or show or whatever they were up to. I am being sold human beings as a product for a temproary creation.

How are none of you ripping your hair out everyday over this? That cute little game on Jimmy Fallon? An ad. Oh she's doing a panel? An ad. Oh they're doing a Reddit AMA? An ad. Literally at this point their whole social media accounts are ads. Their appearances are ads. Everything is a fucking ad. Their existence at this point is an ad. Oh she's the face of Prada, oh he's the face of Gucci. THESE ARE WALKING ADVERTISEMENTS FOR LIFE NOW. The amount of people who keep track of who works for who and which dresses they're allowed to wear make me nauseous. Do you care about your friends as much? Do you notice your family as much? Do you care about your health as much as you care about a Met Gala look from 2013?

And again, I used to do this all the time. I still do! I'm forced to have an opinion on who Ariana Grande is dating. I'm forced to have an opinion on an Andrew Garfield interview. It's absolutely impossible to not have celebrities in your face. Everywhere is merch of their face and photos of their face and quotes from their work with their face tied to it. They are ads. We are paying for people. You pay to meet them. Pay for a photo. Pay for their signature. Pay to see them naked. Pay to see behind the scenes. Pay to see them on a panel. Pay for them. Pay. Pay. pay. pay pay paypaypaypaypay.......

And yet. Here we are. "Anne Hathaway looks so gorgeous for her age because she's unproblematic." "Elon Musk looks hideous and malformed and terrible." Assigning moral value to appearance. Caring about their outfits and hair and "face card" and whatever the fuck else we are cursed to think and see and hear and PAY.

My theory is that everyone hates themselves. Everyone, everyone not on a red carpet or famous on TikTok or not in an ad resents that fact. Everyone wants to be seen, famous, loved, beautiful, attractive, followed. Everyone feels so fucking ugly that they retweet random screenshots from a movie of an actor purely because they're attractive. That looking at someone else, praising them being beautiful is some form of twisted wish fulfillment. And it's sad and it's weird and most importantly it's always turns sexual. It's always "this actor is secretly a bottom" or "this actor could spit in my mouth."

It's the most obscene shit. Imagine a classmate showing you a photo of another classmate and saying the most raunchy, salacious comments. Imagine your uncle showing a photo of a shirtless teenage boy and saying how submissive and breedable he is. Imagine standing in a coffee shop and a barista starts loudly exclaiming how wet they are over a customer. How is it being twitter and a famous person better? Less insane? I find celebrities attractive, but I am not going to make a fucking twitter account roleplaying as a character they played, use only photos of them, and INTERACT PUBLICALLY. Y'all are fucking insane. Absolutely disgusting.

And this doesn't just apply to fucking Twitter trending whoever is hot this week or putting down anyone in a bad pair of jeans. Tumblr sucks too! It's obsessed with actors! Misha Collins???? Why the fuck am I supposed to care about his opinion??? Did I like his performance? Yes. Is his life interesting? Sure. Do I need daily updates about him? What the fuck are y'all on? Reblogging just pictures from magazine shoots? Having entire gifs dedicated to someone just being hot. At what point is it not unhealthy? At wha tpoint are you not feeding a machine of self-hatred and devotion to pixels on a screen that you can only see in person because you fucking paid for it? At what point do you lose yourself?

This is horrible written, doesn't make sense, and is definitely out of order. But I don't care. I'm tired and upset and done with parasocial relationships. Everyone always complains "now is NOT the time to say 'this is why you dont praise people'" YES THE FUCK IT IS YOU ARE A FUCKING IDIOT WHO NEEDS RESTRICTED INTERACT ACCESS

You don't know these people. They have entire TEAMS dedicated to their image and their interviews and their social media and their entire fucking personas. You are getting fed a product and you stupidly fell in love or trusted it or even gaslit yourself into thinking it saw you back. A product cannot love you back, what makes you think it even notices you?

Markiplier could come out as a horrible person tomorrow and as a longtime fan of his channel and an active watcher/listener of his podcast I would stop watching and I would have negative feelings but not a single one would be disappointment. Because I never once assumed I was his friend who knew him. This is a stranger. It's the same feeling if a stranger on the street said something horrible. It's the thought "well I'm not associating with that" and that's the only correct one.

Get a life! Become someone! Who the fuck are you if you exist to talk about someone else? What is your purpose? They already exist, they don't need you, you need you, please for the love of god get off Instagram and find a passion that isn't someone else's success.

and yes I am certain I have evidence of the above in my tumblr blog. I am not different I am not some special little person. I am simply insane and angry and tired. So deeply tired of society.