#talk about internal conflict

[vanibear]

good lord .i think thats all of them (?)

[staruie]

an eternity left behind

[nehoteika]

it's strange, knowing now who it was this whole time...

[wonder-worker]

Thinking about Elizabeth Woodville as a gothic heroine is making me go insane. She entered the story by overturning existing social structures, provoking both ire and fascination. She married into a dynasty doomed to eat itself alive. She was repeatedly associated with the supernatural, both in terms of love and death. Her life was shaped entirely by uncanny repetitions - two marriages, two widowhoods, two depositions, two flights to sanctuary, two ultimate reclamations, all paralleling and ricocheting off each other. Her plight after 1483 exposed the true rot at the heart of the monarchy - the trappings of royalty pulled away to reveal nothing, a never-ending cycle of betrayal and war, the price of power being the (literal) blood of children. She lived past the end of her family name, she lived past the end of her myth. She ended her life in a deeply anomalous position, half-in and half-out of royal society. She was both a haunting tragedy and the ultimate survivor who was finally free.

[allisonjamaica]

posted abt this literally two seconds ago but i’m still thinking about Them so here we go

like look at that body language!! the open expression!! theo literally dragged him in there while liam was losing control but he’s not giving off any anger toward theo at all until theo goes out of his way to be callous about brett and lori. he’s just so earnestly letting theo in on his line of reasoning and i will never not be obsessed with the way he asks “well, are you gonna watch hunters murder [my friends]?” because he so obviously says it as a rhetorical question like!! tell us you’ve started to trust theo without telling us you’ve started to trust theo why don’t you

first of all liam’s little “why are you yelling” is adorable but second of all can we appreciate how he’s just So Confused but he seems more concerned that theo has lost his mind than anything else? like it doesn’t even occur to him that theo’s doing anything shady, he just has no clue why theo’s screaming in that moment. and his expression when theo yells at him to shut up and his whole “did you really have to punch me?” will never not be iconic like PLS he’s basically just whining at theo at this point, there’s no real anger or concern that theo actually wants to hurt him

MYKONOS SCENE MY BELOVED. look at him!! he literally has to take a breath at the end of his infodump because he was so caught up in letting theo in on his plan. like it’s so important to him that theo understands where he’s coming from?? also liam totally talks with his hands in both this scene and in pressure test when he’s explaining to theo that brett and lori were part of satomi’s pack which is (a) adorable and (b) definitely comes across as a sign of him gradually getting more comfortable around theo

all in all i am obsessed with way liam behaves around theo in 6b because he’s so obviously trying to maintain his hostility toward him, but so many of their scenes together make it so clear that, more and more, he’s forgetting to keep it up

[frogaroundandfindout]

the fact that bruce and batman are such distinct entities but also other times he's like "the batman is who I truly am, bruce wayne is a mask" but also batman is a curse but also but also but also

baby girl, WHY are you like this? see, this shit is why we had to drag out that zur en asshole arc for so long

he makes me mentally ill <3

He reminds me of those actors that act like they’ve been irrevocably changed and traumatized by their own method acting

Meanwhile some other heroes (dick for example) are like it really sucks not being able to tell normal people the full truth about my life and it makes dating rough, but it’s still doable

[civilization-illstayrighthere]

Johnny: wow kerry thought he was living in my shadow? shit. I had no idea. wow. this is news to me.

Also Johnny:

[annoying-moth]

Honestly, the qsmp election is really giving me some internal conflicts rn-

On one hand, I wanna vote for bad, I think most of us do lmao. And I too want to see skeppy on the island and think that bad overall is just so perfectly suited for the role.

Now on the other hand-

I wanna vote for jaiden and there's 3 reasons why:

1) she also fits the role perfectly, I mean, did you see how she SLAYED at Juanaflippas trial?? Absolutely ate that shit up fr fr

2) she has a good relationship with the federation, where she's not really getting controlled but also not really against it, maybe trough jaiden, we can turn the federation into an actual ally

3) I think it would be great from a CC basis. Jaiden has recently lost Bobby and therefore a big reason for playing on the qsmp. Max has found something new (S.O.F.I.A. and theory bros), Quakity has found talluha and roir has found love. I think being president on the server would give her a good role on the qsmp so that she can keep being involved and filming content. (I heard that slime and Mariana haven't been streaming much aswell after loosing juanaflippa again so finding something new for them would be ideal aswell, maybe they can be like vice-presidentand secretary or something lmao)

So yeah it's complicated since I have so many reasons to vote for jaiden and my brain is telling that it's obviously the best choice but my heart is telling me "haha funny diamond man and muffin man go brr with sophisticated egg"

[the-lark-ascending69]

Lumity is very cute but it seems like the kind of ship that would have a fandom so toxic it'd make you dislike the ship in time and I think that's sad.

[cant-get-no-worse]

Your writing is always great, I need you to write something to either making us optimistic about the future of the club or to make us realize how much in deep shit we actually are please 😭

Babe, just browse through my La Liga 2022/2023 tag and mourn with me. 💕

[gomzdrawfr]

Gravity

this is a short fic of my oc Raven and Price, feel free to ignore this :] it's properly tagged ((I hope)) anyways if you do read it do lmk how you feel about it :3

word count: 917

Tags: angst, slow burn, enemies to lovers, unrequited love, emotional hurt/comfort, character development and introspection of Raven, complicated relationships, pinning, idiots in love, Raven is simping real hard ngl, Raven is bad at feelings, so is Price, stolen quotes, brief mention of violence, author has not written fics in months

notes: Blue is Raven, Green is Price, Italics can be Raven's own thought or a third perspective thing

Maybe that’s what love is, finding the one person capable of utterly destroying you, but won’t

As this realization dawned on her, fear gripped her heart.

Not sure when it all happened, how it happened in the first place. A weapon like her capable of feeling something, a dormant part of her, long forgotten and locked away in the deepest part of herself, now comes spilling out, and she barely can keep them at bay.

This is why you never play with your food.

Perhaps the moment of realization came one night when she decided to observe him, as she often did, but this time it was different.

Instead of the usual sight of the Captain entering his office and burying himself in paperwork, accompanied by the sight of smoke from the cigars he favored (four in a night, to be exact), she saw a disheveled man. He stumbled into the room, one hand clutching a bottle, and collapsed onto the nearest sofa.

Drunk, that much is clear.

She found herself smiling behind the scope, a smile she quickly wiped away.

Focus. 

And so she did, her gaze tracing over his tousled, unkempt hair, the scarf on his neck that had shifted slightly and fallen off, revealing a trail of freckles cascading down from his cheek. Her eyes wandered down his back to his waist—how could a man his size have such a small waist?

But her favorite? His hands.

Rough, calloused, and adorned with faint traces of pink and green on his knuckles. His left hand, in particular, had a subtle prominence of veins, now loosely gripping the bottle.

What day was it to get this drunk?

She stepped closer.

When did she get into the office again?

Carefully stepping over the scattered papers and books near the sofa, she carefully squatted down, and gently placed her hand next to his on the floor.

Warm. Always so warm.

She felt the heat emanating from his palm, tempting her to hold it.

Perhaps she could, considering he seemed unlikely to wake anytime soon.

Despite her initial indifference toward this man, the Lieutenant now turned Captain she was supposed to kill, she couldn’t deny the growing curiosity she had for him. 

It’ll pass. She thinks.

It only gets worse, the more she watches him and the more they occasionally go throat to throat with each other, more things and feelings start bubbling up.

Suffocating, distracting….addicting.

This unexplained attraction that has now gone beyond mere curiosity and interest has fallen into a deep pit of attachment and want.

A dangerous development, one that she comes to realize all too late. 

It’s a mixture of frustration and anticipation, unsettled for the uncertainty and possibilities, on another, the inner beast clawing in the deep part of her chest that screams the need for something.

It wasn’t love, or was it?

Is love supposed to feel like this? The feeling of someone extending their hands into an open wound, a sliver of a hole that somehow cracked open, allowing them to touch the most broken, delicate part of their soul that had long been forgotten.

In all honesty, he had done nothing, if their banters and conflicts counted as nothing. 

A not-so-distant memory bubbled up. 

“Tell me why I shouldn't put a bullet through that pretty head of yours, Raven,”

Price's voice was a harsh whisper, his fingers entwined in her hair, forcing her to meet his burning gaze.

That same old glare, always in control wasn’t he? 

“Growing a beard out, Pricey? It suits you” Price’s eyes widened for a split second, wavered even, before he regained composure.

Not as controlled as he would like to be whenever it’s her.

“How the hell did you kno- never mind that- answer the que-” “The hat sucks though,” she interrupted, a smirk playing on her lips. Another moment of silence, the cold feeling of the muzzle digging into her chin, but the grip on her hair loosened ever so slightly. “Does it actually?” “Yes” “Hm, guess I’ll wear it more often then” She couldn't stifle her amusement, even if she tried.

If he wanted to, he would have pulled the trigger a long time ago, and yet here they are.

Dancing around fire, blades and gunpowder like a couple of moths.

Both yearning for more, even if they know things will go up in flames.

She supposed, if she truly were to die in his hand, perhaps it would be worth it. 

Because death sure has gentle, ocean eyes. 

A grunt pulled her out of the memory as she returned to reality, it seemed the drunk Captain somehow managed to turn around and lay on the couch with the side of his face pressed onto the couch. How can he be comfortable like that? The sight made her chuckle lightly, as she leaned forward and brushed his hair away. The loose strands moved ever so slightly, soft in her hands, and she watched as the lines and wrinkles smoothed from the gesture.

I'm letting it happen aren’t I?

I’m going to let you love me, just as much as I love you, and let it ruin me. 

She planted a small kiss on his forehead, her lips remained for a few moments selfishly on the warm skin, as her gaze lingered on his sleeping form silently, a tender gesture that surprised herself.

It didn’t matter if she didn’t fully comprehend what love is, at least for now.

For now, this will do. 

additional notes: the flashback is inspired by this doodle The first quote is from John Green's novel, "The Fault in Our Stars."

[uten4]

The way that the Akuma no Riddle anime never explicitly talks about being gay but only works because it's gay... If Tokaku were a boy then it would be so much easier for her to be like "okay, I'm protecting Haru because I'm in love with her" and to accept that, or Haru would face her feelings more and suggest the idea that they're in love. But because they are both girls, it's not considered a given that they would be in love. Many gay people have these doubts in the back of their mind, especially when they've only recently started realizing they're gay-- "Am I really attracted to this person, or is it just [insert deflection of choice]?"

And Tokaku is forced to think, "Do I really care about her, or has she just been using psychological powers to manipulate me this whole time? Why do I feel so strongly about this girl?" And attraction or love don't appear to be a satisfying enough reason or excuse. And of course it wouldn't! They're both girls! 😱

[void-botanist]

Rose's Kiss Week Day 5: Lonely

OCs: Marcus Asalun (aka Anchesh Pabat) and Gren Orech-Pabat

Words: 1335

Content warnings: mentions of family health issues

Notes: this takes place six months after Anchesh married his last spouse, human himbo Gren.

At the other end of the sofa, Gren sighed for the tenth time in as many minutes.  He was staring off at the other end of the room, chin propped up in one big hand, and more than likely didn’t even realize he sounded so despondent.  

“How are you doing?” Anchesh asked.

“I’m fine.  It’s just lonely without Yera.”

Probably it was best not to talk too much about Yera, because Gren would only get sadder if he started thinking about why Yera was out of town and how stressed she must be.  Instead Anchesh put aside his knitting.  

“I’m probably not as good at cuddling as Yera,” he said, moving to the cushion next to Gren, “but I’m here.”

Gren instantly pivoted and deflated into his lap, settling one cheek against his thigh and a hand over his knee.  Today Gren’s hair was held in a bunlike fold with just an alligator clip, which Anchesh gently pulled out and set on the open cushion beside him.  Then he combed his fingers back through Gren’s loose locks.

“I feel bad being lonely,” Gren murmured.  “Her family needs her way more than I do, and I’m not alone here.”

“You’re her family too,” Anchesh answered in the same low tone.  “And it doesn’t feel the same, not having her here.”

“Yeah.”  Gren squeezed his leg a little, like he needed something to cling to.  

Anchesh let Gren’s hair slip through his fingers over and over, massaging Gren’s scalp with each draw.  Truth be told, he was worried about Yera too.  She would be fine, unless her father got worse.  He probably wouldn’t die, not yet, but the wondering and waiting felt unsettling enough for him at home—it must be awful for her.  She was right to have the rest of them stay behind, except Hossan, because sooner or later they’d all be at loose ends and end up making her feel worse.  But he still wished he could be there to hold her and talk to her, probably just the same as Gren.  

“Maybe I don’t spend enough time with the rest of you,” Gren said suddenly.  “Especially you.”

“I don’t mind how much time you spend with Yera and Hossan,” Anchesh answered.

“Yeah, but—” Gren rose from his lap, slowly enough that he didn’t pull his own hair in Anchesh’s hands.  With his hair pushed behind his ears, he said, “I’m your husband too.  And you don’t get tired of me like Pali does.  I would leave you alone if you wanted me to but you’ve never told me to do that.”

Anchesh handed him the alligator clip.  “I mean, I’m happy to spend more time with you.  I just don’t want you to worry too much about it.”

Gren stared at nothing while he smoothed his hair back into a ponytail and clipped it there.  Then he continued looking at some spot further down the sofa.  “Anchesh...do you love me?”

It was a serious question that deserved a serious answer, but Anchesh was distracted by the plaintiveness of Gren’s voice.  Had this been worrying him for the last six months?  

Gren waited two seconds before adding, “Not like you love Yera or Umedes, but...”

He took Gren’s hand from his lap, and Gren looked up.  “I do love you, Gren.  You’re my friend.  And my husband.  And I’m glad I married you.”

“Really?”  He didn’t seem entirely convinced.

“Really.  I would have married you just for Yera and Hossan, but I like having you around too.  You’re so bright, and lovely, and you always make sure we have what we need.  And—”

“I think Pali does that.”

“Pali doesn’t keep everyone upbeat,” Anchesh said.  “And she’s definitely not good at making sure we all rest, especially not herself.  I think she’s gotten more sleep in the six months you’ve been here than she has since I married her.”  Gren didn’t say anything, so he kept going.  “We need someone who’s as thoughtful as you are.  I need someone who is.”  An almost melancholy gratitude welled up in him, and he tried to figure out how to put words to it.  He wasn’t sure that Gren understood how much he made life more bearable.  He wasn’t sure any of his spouses did, even though he didn’t know where he’d be without them.  He loved all of them, and he needed all of them, and on some level he needed Gren, the only one who wasn’t at least a little wrapped up in politics and particularities, most of all.  He put his other hand over Gren’s.  “You mean a lot to me, Gren.”

“Do you think you could say that more?  Not that, but like, ‘I love you’?”

When was the last time he’d told Gren he loved him?  Even if he didn’t remember exactly, he had a feeling it had been days, or weeks.  He’d decided without thinking about it that Gren didn’t really need to hear it, and he definitely didn’t need to hear it from him, arguably Gren’s least favorite spouse aside from Pali.  

“Of course I can,” he said, rubbing his thumb over the back of Gren’s hand.  “I’m sorry I haven’t said it very much.”

“It’s okay.”  Gren put his other hand on top of Anchesh’s.  Then he dropped his cheek against Anchesh’s shoulder.  

“You know you can always tell me about your feelings,” Anchesh said.

“You don’t tell me about yours,” Gren said.  “Except in bed, kinda.”

“Do you want to know about my feelings?”

“Yes!”  Gren lifted his head and his face was all exasperation.  “I know I don’t understand all of the things you do but I can understand how you feel!”

“Most of my feelings aren’t good.”  And it would be cruel to burden someone like Gren with them.

“I still want to know,” Gren said.  “I just want to be there for you, but I never know what’s going on with you.”

He’d given up on being there for Gren because it was obvious Gren didn’t need him, and he couldn’t keep track of the constantly shifting world he lived in with Yera and Hossan.  “While Yera and Hossan are gone, maybe we should focus on that.  Being there for each other.”

“I’d like that.”  Gren’s eyes fell to their hands, and Anchesh thought he could see a blush rising in his cheeks.  “I’d also like to kiss you more.”

“You can kiss me whenever you want.”  He felt like he meant that the most of anything he’d said so far.  Gren raised his head and went straight to softly touching his lips to Anchesh’s, his mustache tickling at Anchesh’s smooth-shaven upper lip.

On the next kiss his hand caressed the curve of Anchesh’s neck, and then he untangled his other hand from Anchesh’s and threw both arms around his neck, and when that apparently wasn’t enough he broke the kiss and fully straddled Anchesh’s thighs, hunching a little to reach his lips.  Anchesh tilted his head further back in turn, feeling the pleasant tension of his horns pressing against the back of the sofa.  Despite his position, Gren didn’t seem like he was trying to be seductive.  He kissed Anchesh to savor him, like he was fresh water on Gren’s parched tongue, a tongue carefully exploring the contours of Anchesh’s.  He was in no rush, and his skin was warm against Anchesh’s where they touched, Gren’s feet pressed against his knees, hands along the edge of his neckline, soft lips drinking him in.  Anchesh let his hands run back over Gren’s thighs, his hips, to the bare, fuzzy skin at his midriff, and held on there.  

When Gren pulled back at long last, his breath was edged with gasps, and so was Anchesh’s.

“I love you, Anchesh.  I love you so much.”

Without a word, they pulled each other close, Anchesh wrapping his arms around Gren’s back as he leaned forward to press his cheek against Gren’s shoulder.

“I love you too, Gren.”

RKW taglist: @vacantgodling @jezifster @kk7-rbs

[emimillerart]

Do you realise exactly how long a minute lasts? An hour? Sitting in that mire of self-hatred, I was acutely aware of each silence between ticks, dragging out slow and treacle-like.

Goncharov (1973), study of the cigar scene

[rxvera]

Sometimes I think people need to take a step back from arguing about Israel and Palestine all day and realize that there are much larger scale problems in the world. Everyone's become so focused one issue that they're willing to ignore and belittle the suffering of everyone else.

[kiras-monkey-bum-face]

where's the love for the average lesbians (me)? you know the ones that are too masc to be considered femme but too femme to be considered masc (still me)? the lesbians that don't want to move fast and can't stand the idea of dating apps because they just favour the conventionally attractive (also me). where's the love for the lesbians that dont want to fall into a stereotype catagory and just want to exist (I'm talking about me)