#tales from the shadows spoilers
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queenhelenblackthorn · 2 years ago
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Cast Long Shadows
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Chain of Gold
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Chain of Iron
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Chain of Thorns
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izar-tarazed · 4 months ago
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In hindsight, Izar found that walking in on Messmer wearing the armor of his slain girlfriend had probably been a bit tactless.
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memorys-skyscraper · 1 year ago
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cannot overstate the extent to which this single line has given me brainworms
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kingstealer · 10 months ago
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v'tchos tia's fingers close around the haft of the spear he's just been handed, and he is home in a way he's never been holding a staff.
the spear is nothing special--a piece of filed metal, lashed to a weathered piece of wood. but it's familiar in his hands, and as he goes through the motions of driving it through hapless wildlife, it comes alive.
his skill is praised, his aptitude for the lance extolled. but he knows in his bones and at the base of his skull that he's done all this before, and is just remembering it.
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when he's offered a position as the pupil of ishgard's former azure dragoon, it takes no effort to accept--a skill that is quickly put to the test as he is driven out of the only place he's ever known into the brutal winters of coerthas, to end a neverending war.
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as the snow, and the war, thaws, v'tchos stumbles upon a corpse in a forgotten alley in the slums--a corpse that offers him a sword.
"i've only got the one," he says, with a flash of a smile in his glowing red eyes. "take it. it's yours."
a stone tumbles from the corpse's pocket as he stands, and the ache at the base of v'tchos's skull flares. he fumbles through the hallowed halls of the heavens' ward, shaking from the weight of the sword, fingers drenched in blood and darkness. and something at the bottom of his soul curls into a smile.
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he had picked up a grimoire, joined the arcanist's guild, on a whim--etrii had said something half-seriously about how little he knew about magic, back when the pieces of the war were still being picked up, and his contrarian streak reared its head. with whispers from a voice he would swear was familiar echoing through his skull, he traces runes and sigils in the book, puzzling through it. trying not to think about how his friends lay a few rooms over, chests barely rising and falling, and how little he knows about anything that could be done to save them.
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not for much longer. he will figure this out.
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v'tchos is in ul'dah when a passing stranger offers him a job. he is barely surprised when it turns out to be a ruse, and curiosity leads him back to where the lemures keep their court. the woman in charge hands him a crystal, the pain in the back of his skull stabs, and--
a haunting hooded figure hangs in the air over her desk.
something deep within him opens an eye.
hands barely shaking, v'tchos accepts the scythe he is offered. it's familiar in his hands the way the spear was--which should probably scare him, but he doesn't think to be afraid.
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he stands over the defeated body of a voidsent, watching it dissolve into ash. coerthan winds flutter his coat and ruffle his hair.
the voidsent he has come to regard as his own creeps up at his feet, like a coerl seeking attention. we could do that, it seems to whisper. we could be that.
the thing deep in his soul, steeped in blood and shadow, cracks open a second eye.
no, it says, echoing across the ancient stone.
no, you won't.
something shatters inside him, a cage thrown wide. for half a terrifying heartbeat he's convinced it's the Light from the Wardens finally killing him.
a flurry of movement whirls across the ground. a piteous scream sounds silently before it is choked off, and there is the wet crunch of snapping bone.
v'tchos draws a shuddering breath--and is enshrouded in darkness.
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a familiar darkness, he realizes. a darkness he walks alongside.
that's better, fray murmurs.
and he agrees.
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the first time he calls forth bahamut, drawn from the aether that tore through him all those years ago, g'raha smiles. there's enough joy in that expression that he can ignore the flinch alisaie almost manages to hide, across the courtyard. the demi-primal swoops across the sky, and the former exarch's eyes are alight with wonder.
"that one's from you," v'tchos says, arm draped over the other miqo'te's shoulders. a grimoire faced in allagan gold and blue dangles from the fingers of his other hand. "and those old books in your tower."
g'raha just grins, eyes fixed on the sky.
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v'tchos startles awake from a catnap at the sound of books dropping onto his desk. he blinks the sleep from his eyes to see g'raha standing triumphantly in front of him, his expression only slightly marred by guilt at having interrupted a well-earned rest.
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"i found something new--well, old--in the Tower," g'raha blurts, fixing the immaculate tie on one of his armguards. "there aren't many references, not to the machi, but. this codex survived." he picks up one of the books.
"they didn't used to be just summoners. they could heal, too."
any remaining thoughts of sleep are stolen from v'tchos with that turn of phrase. he pushes himself to his feet, reaches for the codex, and begins to read.
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the first real interaction v'tchos has with the viera who showed up half-dead to their confrontation with elidibus, after pouring half his blood back in his body when he insisted on helping fight the warrior of light personified, is with a blacksmith's hammer in hand. helios takes a cursory look at him, polishing a botanist's scythe, and says: i wonder what you could do with a firearm.
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and while he proves himself more than capable at the marksmanship, where v'tchos really feels at home in machinistry is the tinkering. he drags cracked and broken allagan constructs from the depths of the crystal tower and remodels them to fight for him, alongside him.
that doesn't stop him, however, from standing at g'raha's side in the bozjan resistance. while they always have more things to do, curing tempering and all, there's plenty of time to for one catboy from corvos and one who at this point might as well be to spend fighting garleans on dalmascan soil.
and of course, there's no keeping helios from a cause. helios, who quickly proves himself as capable with a gunblade as with a rifle.
so it is that in the trenches of the bozjan southern front, at the gates of castrum lacus litore, and finally storming the dalriada, it is helios leading the charge with his gunblade, with g'raha and v'tchos at his heels--g'raha armed with his fragment of the crystal tower, light and dark magic at his fingertips, while v'tchos takes careful aim with a custom-built firearm, ready to throw a repurposed allagan construct into the fray.
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spacehero-23 · 2 years ago
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I'm sorry but "Belial gave them their powers" makes no sense because why would he give them to Lucie? That man is a dictionary example of a misogynist. He wouldn't even think of her.
also. wasn't there a whole thing with Ragnor wanting James to train as a warlock? so he thought it was possible that James could practice magic...
idk if you can tell... but I absolutely hate that tlh ended with the "main character loses their special powers at the end of the series" trope.
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helenofblackthorns · 2 years ago
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Per your tags, Matthew has never been the leader and doesn’t even give off that vibe 😂 It’s always seemed like James, he may be quiet and doesn’t tell a joke every five seconds but it doesn’t mean he’s not the leader type like his father. Of course Wills son would be the leader, Matthew was also drunk the entire series so we wouldn’t have gotten his genuine healthy POV anyway. The short stories will be from the real Matthews POV not the drunk one
I mean, Matthew is Charlotte's son why can't he be a leader 🤨 also here's multiple quotes that show him being the leader/the one who looks out for everyone else & holds the group together
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all of these come from the short stories written & published before Chain of Gold, and before Matthew starts drinking. Obviously Matthew's alcoholism is going to impede on his ability to care for others, both physically & psychologically, but tlh never really acknowledges it at all? I can continue to beat this dead horse into the ground but I think you get my point.
also Matthew's "real" POV?? he's suffering from an addiction not a possession 😟 just because he's mentally ill doesn't mean his POV would be ungenuine and not hold the exact same value as any of characters POV???? the hell???? also Matthew didn't magically stop being mentally ill at the end of ChoT, he will be an alcoholic for the rest of his life; he will never be able to causally drink, and it's entirely possible he will be relapse at some point. Healing is not some linear journey, and some days will be worse than others. However, I do believe Matthew is capable of getting back up after the bad days, especially now that he's told his secret to James & his family and more willing to accept their help.
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honeyxmonkey · 2 years ago
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I finished s2 of shadow and bone
It's taking everything in my power not to start writing another crossover like the deranged gremlin I am
I already have half a plot for it too
I'm not mentally well
Wesper and Carterdoux are singlehandedly holding up my sanity rn
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readitwatchitwriteit · 2 years ago
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I want the book between series to follow matthew. But I also would like it to follow Euginea. I feel they both deserve to have more story, and have more story to tell. I also want to feel more grief for christopher and find out what Grace is up to. I don't think she needs a whole book but a chapter or flashback just to see where she's at.
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zosan-secondchances · 9 days ago
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The Pirate King of the North
Main Themes: Villain Sanji, Alternate Universe, Zosan Ship
AU where Straw Hat Pirates meet old Sanji from a reality where Reiju didn't have emotions.
Warning: Long post ahead and some One Piece spoilers. Contains strong language.
Part 1 | 2 | 3
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Young Zoro hates the fucker but those scars and piercings are doing a number to his soul.
Old Sanji's story goes like this:
He didn't experience compassion from anyone else aside from his mother, who--you know what happened.
Judge kept him locked away until he was 13. He had him released when he was deemed too broken to do anything, and he was apparently a waste of space. As far as the world was concerned, he was already dead. He gets left behind at some random pirate town in the North.
His swirly brows were recognized by the pirates who took him in--only for him to be enslaved because people would pay a lot to have their way with royalty.
He picked up some skills from the other slaves and became cunning af--because he had to be.
At 17 he started a revolt against the slaver pirates, effectively taking over as their new pirate captain.
He became the feared "Mr. Prince" and his words are as sharp as his bite.
He's underweight because he doesn't give two shits about good food.
"The All Blue? It's nothing but an old fishwive's tale," he says.
He used his cunning mind and new pirate crew to hunt down and kill his own father from the shadows.
He enslaved his own siblings and becomes the new ruler of Germa Kingdom. Over the years, he used them for warfare and expanded the territory of the North.
His heart is a bottomless pit for power and control.
He had a fling or two or several with is closely allied with Doflamingo because god damn they're both mad like that. The alliance eventually lead to direct connections with Celestial Dragons.
Sanji gains more power and becomes the notorious "Pirate King of the North"
Meanwhile at the other side of the world, Luffy didn't make it as far as he could have without a good cook.
Luffy would have recruited one from Baratie but the restaurant was absolutely destroyed before the smaller Straw Hat crew could make a difference. Some of the staff didn't make it.
Zoro left the crew when it fell apart at some point.
Due to Zoro's reputation and bounty that he had occurred during his limited time with Luffy, he was offered a position as a Warlord, ultimately taking over the late Jinbe's old role. He accepted and served for several years before he was assigned a job that he didn't know would be the most challenging one yet.
The Celestial Dragons didn't like the fact that Sanji had started to have more worldly control over their own, so Zoro was quietly assigned to hunt down the great Pirate King of the North. Zoro accepted because he felt that he needed more experience before he could take on Mihawk again.
Zoro quickly realised that this mission is not a walk in the park.
Sanji loves toying with the Demon Warlord so he insists on taking him on by himself.
It becomes an endless game of cat and mouse. Sometimes Sanji chases and sometimes he runs, sometimes he wins and sometimes he loses.
They're at each others' throats everywhere in the world. Any person, city or being of any kind that gets in the way usually gets torn apart in the chaos. The hunt goes on for a lifetime. They're currently in their 40's.
Zoro severs Sanji's left arm during one huge fight.
Because of this, Sanji relentlessly tries to get Zoro to marry him to use him in so many ways he can think of--both as an asset and under the sheets--oh the things that he wants the swordsman to do and beg for.
Sanji likes to refer to the tiniest scar on his lip as "Zoro's love bite"
He was about to get a nice fresh one on his chest when some fuckers teleported him away.
Hearing old Sanji's backstory was a bit much. It was young Zoro's turn to have a nosebleed that day.
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Oh yes I had fun drawing old silver fox, damaged Sanji. I wish I have the time to colour it up. I've also been very much into reading AU stories, especially soul brand ones. Keep them coming, you beautiful people.
Edit: Woo! I finally decided to make my own AO3 account. It's about time. Link here for the story: https://archiveofourown.org/works/60686077
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makethatelevenrings · 2 days ago
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Ubi Amor Ibi Fides (Where there's love, there's faith) // Lucius Verus x f!reader
summary: When he saw you that day, surrounded by a gaggle of children who begged you to tell them a story, he had no idea that the Fates had their own epic tale in mind of everlasting devotion. OR, contrasting vignettes of the past and the present through the eyes of Hanno and his wife.
word count: 13.2k
warnings: SPOILERS FOR THE MOVIE!! 18+, war, blood, death, allusions to rape and what happens to female prisoners of war, allusion to desecration of a corpse, historical inaccuracy (if Ridley Scott can do it, so can I!), smut, Lucius being Down Bad for this wife, mythology and religion (with inaccuracies), discussion of suicide, suicide attempt, grief, throwing up, Roman culture???, period-typical misogyny but like, make it feminist
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“Tell me a story.”
Exhaustion clouded his voice and you turned away from your weaving to find him leaning against the roughshod mudbrick door frame. It was days like today that you cursed his stubborn nature. While he had been willing to let you help in breaking in the ground for the coming harvest, your husband sent you inside by midday when the sun was at its highest. Now, you were rested and chilled by the wind that eased its way through the small house, and he was completely depleted.
“Come.” You beckoned him with an outstretched hand. “Rest beside me and then I will tell you.”
He didn’t argue, for once, and took your hand in his. You drew him down to sit beside you, his head settling in your lap. Your fingers curled into the soft, downy hair at his temples and he relaxed with a sigh. While you wished you could continue stroking his hair, the weaving in front of you wouldn’t be completed without two hands. As you went back to your work, you began to speak.
“There were once two lovers by the name of Pyramus and Thisbe…” He huffed out a quiet laugh. You smiled at him, delighted that it made him relax even further. Most of your stories were the ones he had told you about from his childhood and you weren’t really in the right mind to come up with a fresh story.
“The parents of our two lovers refused to let them marry, but their love reigned strong through the thin crack in the stone wall that divided their property.” As you spoke, you embellished the story with extraneous details and dramatic gasps, eliciting quiet chuckles from your husband. He looked weary these days and not just from the labor in the fields. The Romans were creeping closer, and it would only be a matter of time before they came to your city. You woke up last night to a cold bed and found him standing at the doorway, staring out towards the sea. He knew what was coming. You both did.
“The gods looked favorably upon their sacrifice and changed the tree to its dark appearance to signify the devotion between them.” You ended the tale and stopped your weaving for a moment to gently trace your fingers along the edge of his features. You loved the sharp crest of his nose, the curve of his lips, and the bright blue of his eyes. His lashes were so long that they left shadows across his cheeks when he shut his eyes.
“I understand why he did it,” he said softly.
“Hmm?” Your hand stroked over his curls once more as you thought through everything you needed to get done tomorrow. You paused, however, when you felt his face turn to see you better and his lips brushed against your palm.
“I understand why Pyramus ended his life.” His calloused palm covered your own and he turned your hand over, his fingers sliding along yours and intertwining. “One can only imagine the pain he must have felt.”
A painful squeeze built in your throat and you felt an awful burning sensation behind your eyes. He sat up and gently cupped your face in one of his large hands, drawing your gaze up to meet his.
“Hanno,” you breathed. He smiled softly and leaned in to capture your lips in a sweet kiss. He was never one for words, always more inclined to act. Breaking apart, you pressed your forehead against his and breathed in the masculine scent of him tinged with soil, sweat, and something purely him.
“When death claims us, we go as one,” he vowed. “I cannot exist in this world without you.”
“As the gods see fit,” you assured him. “I will follow you wherever you lead.”
You wished this was a story.
It had been an easy day in the fields. You were sprinkling seeds in the ditches that Hanno dug earlier. The chickens clucked at you from their pen, begging for a bit more food as if they hadn’t been fed a hearty amount of grain earlier. After you planted these, Hanno would place the earth back over it while you worked on your herb garden.
You were capable of doing the hard, manual labor. Growing up, you would always help your parents through the entire process of planting, but Hanno was insistent on keeping his precious wife away from the heavy work. Rather, he encouraged your herb collecting and training with some of the city healers. You were grateful for him, truly. Most men would sequester their wives in their homes and work them to their deaths from labor, both of earth and child. 
But Hanno was different. 
He taught you to read, speak, and write in Latin. He would easily switch between Numidian, Phoenician, and Latin until you could respond perfectly. When he took breaks from tilling, plowing, and managing the harder tasks with the animals, he sat next to you at your garden and asked about the different plants. He was never cruel, never struck you or screamed at you the way you had heard other wives whisper to one another. In fact, Hanno was exceedingly kind to you and to anyone he didn’t view as a threat.
Which is why you thought this was a nightmare at first.
The horns of war sounded and you stood up straight to watch as the beacons erupted with fire at the top of the wall. Fear seized your heart and you stood frozen, transfixed, by the flames that licked the sky. Smoke curled off the top of them and the smell burned at your nose. You might have stood there all day if it hadn’t been for Hanno rushing out of the small house to your side.
“Come,” your husband instructed you. “We must get ready.”
He grasped your arm gently and it snapped you out of your reverie. Swallowing down your panic, you followed him into the house and to the small trunk he had made to hold your armor. The two of you silently donned your gear and were nearly finished when Jugurtha came to your door.
“My lord,” you greeted him with a slight bow. The chieftain’s face betrayed nothing, but you could see the worry in his eyes. Hanno and Jugurtha would be in the heat of the battle, directly in the path of the oncoming Roman fury. Would the gods listen if you sent them a prayer now? It felt as though they had decided to abandon you.
“The healers are gathering at Taklit’s house.” Jugurtha looked at the two of you, a hidden regret in his gaze. “We will come retrieve you once we have claimed victory.”
“Yes, my lord.” Your voice had softened as you realized how quickly this was all happening.
“I will join you soon,” Hanno replied. Jugurtha nodded and left, his imposing figure leaving an empty space in the doorway and in your heart. Needing a distraction, you turned and focused your attention on securing Hanno’s armor. As your trembling fingers finished tightening his armor, his hand enfolded around yours and he drew your fingers up to his lips. Hanno placed a delicate kiss on the tips of each finger. You searched his face to memorize every last detail, from the crinkles beside his eyes to the slight curve of his lip. Only the gods knew how this battle would end and the anxiety felt like it was going to swallow you alive.
“We go as one,” he reminded you. “I will not lose you.”
“Nor I, you.” His lips ghosted over yours and you leaned up, capturing him in a searing kiss. You poured every ounce of your devotion, fear, and worry into the kiss and he took it all onto his broad shoulders, shielding you from this world. His hand fisted in your hair and he pulled you impossibly closer so he could sink the weight of his devotion into every fiber of your being.
The gods had granted you this man as your husband. Perhaps they had not abandoned you yet.
“Be brave, my Hanno,” you whispered once you broke apart. He pressed his brow to yours and you breathed him in. “Be strong and be brave. And come back to me.”
The warm metal of his betrothal ring pressed into the skin of your cheek as he cradled your face between his hands. He kissed your forehead, his lips warm against your clammy skin. You savored the ring, this physical reminder of his tie to you, and touched the one that rested on your hand as a reminder of your tie to him.
“I will see you soon, my love.”
How bittersweet endings are, you thought to yourself as the walls of the city were seized by Romans. Men and women fell left and right from the parapets and you knew there was no help you could give them once their bodies hit the ground. Instead, you watched in horror as Roman soldiers grew closer and closer to where you were stationed and awaiting the wounded. You could see Hanno at the top of the wall fighting for his very life and your heart beat wildly in your chest at the sight of so many men around him falling in battle. Would he be next?
A cry of pain nearby alerted you to someone needing help. One of your people had been caught within the crosshairs of an archer and you rushed out of the house to grab them and drag them to safety. The child, only a mere babe, shrieked in agony as you dove to cover his little body when another arrow went sailing over your head. Even over the din of war, you heard Hanno scream your name. 
A Roman soldier grabbed you by your hair and yanked you up off the ground, forcing your back to bend sharply and a shout to emerge from your lips. He drew his sword, placing it to your throat with the intention of drawing your blood, your life, out of you with one swift pull. Despite knowing it wouldn’t help, you shouted your status in Latin.
“Healer! I’m a healer!” Perhaps he would be merciful. Perhaps he would let you go. Your eyes sought out the top of the wall and you saw Hanno desperately fighting to get to you, but he was too far away. The blade knicked the soft skin of your throat.
Two things happened simultaneously. One, a general pointed at you from the crowd and yelled at his man to stop. Two, Hanno was shoved off the wall and into the sea, right where huge rocks clashed with the waves.
A scream escaped you. A wail. War makes widows, your mother had said. And here you were, one of them. 
The soldier removed his blade and forced you up to your feet, shoving you back in the direction of the house. You scrambled to scoop up the child in your arms. If you could not save your love, maybe you could at least save a mother from grief.
The child died in your arms by the time you stepped into the healer house.
Numidia fell. Rome claimed victory and dominion over the land. Hanno was dead.
You busied yourself with tending to the wounded in hopes that you wouldn’t think about the fact that you were now under Rome’s control, a widow, and possibly homeless. What would happen next? Would they let you retrieve his body? Or would they throw him into a pile and burn it all along with the city itself?
A shadow fell over you as you tended to one of your own. You looked up to find the general gazing down at you. All at once, you were filled with hot rage and the deepest sorrow. You stood quickly, your hand reaching for a stray knife on the ground but he merely raised a brow. Right. What skill do you have against a Roman general?
“You’re a healer,” he said, not as a question. “And you speak Latin. How?”
“How do I heal or how do I speak Latin?” you spat. He remained stoic and you narrowed your eyes in suspicion. You would never reveal Hanno’s secrets. Not even under the threat of death.
“My husband is-” You stopped yourself and swallowed hard. “Was a merchant. He taught me so I could help him sell.”
“But you are a healer.”
You shrugged. “We do what we must.”
He studied you carefully and then nodded at one of his soldiers. A sudden bolt of terror struck you. Was this your future? To be a general’s plaything? A concubine? Some kind of bed warmer until he got back to Rome and disposed of you into the nearest brothel?
No. You were the wife of Hanno, a kind man and a good soldier.
“If you expect me to lay with you, I ask that you let me slit my wrists first so that I can die knowing I never let you take more from me than you already have,” you hissed. The soldier went to unsheathe his sword, but the general raised a hand to stop him. He took in your figure and the way you trembled with rage and grief.
“I need a healer,” he explained. “For my men. I will not touch you, for I am a married man, and you are a widow.”
He turned to the soldier once again. “Place her in chains and then put her in my room. Do not lay a finger on her, nor let anyone else.”
What choice did you have? If you defied them, you would be dead. If you went with them, you would have a chance to avenge Hanno before you died. Either way, you would join your husband in the afterlife. Going meant you had a chance to drag another life with you on the journey.
You dropped the blade and let the soldier lead you to the ships, not daring to look at the mass of bodies being piled up on the sand. Tears blurred your vision as you were hauled onto the ship. The keening wails of mourners raised above the fractured walls and you watched as smoke started to envelope the city. Just this morning, you had been thinking about spring planting and now you were a Roman slave.
What fresh hell was this?
The soldier clamped the heavy irons onto your wrists, connecting them together, and then attached two to your feet as well, forcing you into a shuffle as he then moved further below deck to a room. He tossed a thin blanket onto the wooden floor and pointed at it. You needed no words to explain that it would be your new bed.
When the door shut behind him, you fell to your knees over the chamber pot and promptly threw up everything in your stomach. An agonized sob tore from your lungs and you grit your teeth to silence the wail that threatened to emerge. You beat your fists on the hard, unforgiving wooden floor and wept silent tears, rocking back and forth in time to the crests and waves of the wailing mourners outside. Your people were subjugated. Your home was destroyed.
Your Hanno was dead.
Oh Thisbe, you thought as hot tears coursed down your cheeks. I understand. I understand. I understand. If I cannot shoulder this burden, then let the gods strike me down so that I may join him in peace.
“Tell us a story!”
The voices of children bubbled up over the crowd and Hanno looked up from sharpening his sword to find a woman surrounded. The kids eagerly mobbed her, their little heads bobbing up and down as they pleaded for her to tell them a tale. A basket balanced precariously on her head, but she seemed as though there was no worry about it falling.
But the thing that Hanno noticed the most was that she was completely and utterly beautiful.
“Who is that?” Jugurtha smiled at the young soldier’s question. He saw the way the woman captured his gaze. He knew that look in his eyes.
Jugurtha said your name quietly and explained how your family used to live on the outskirts of the city so they could accommodate a larger farm, but recent skirmishes in the area had wounded your father and drew you behind the walls of the city. Hanno had met your father before and made a mental note to visit the man and see how he was healing. Perhaps he would bring some fresh fruits from the merchants.
Jugurtha must have caught onto his train of thought because he called you over. The gaggle of children followed closely behind and you laughed, a sound that Hanno delighted in hearing.
“Are you interested in a story too, my lord?” You said in greeting. Jugurtha grinned and gestured for you to sit.
“You’ve been hard at work. Take a moment to rest and tell the children a story.”
With careful hands, you reached up and lowered the basket to the ground. Hanno could see it was full of various types of plants and fabrics. He had a million questions swirling around in his head. What did you do to pass the time? Where were you staying? Did you like it here? He stayed silent, however, as you slowly lowered yourself onto the ground. Your dress pooled around your legs and the coins on your shawl clinked against each other. What would you look like bare? He banished the thought as soon as it appeared.
“Come.” You beckoned the children to sit around you and gathered one of the youngest into your lap. The child reached up and played with the ends of your veil and you smiled down at her before beginning your story.
“Long ago, there was a queen of Numidia by the name of Kahina. When invaders came to Numidia to conquer us, she stood strong and fought them off with all of her might. Kahina was brave and smart, using both her strength and her mind to push the invaders back.” You launched into a tale filled with drama, some comedy, and even a bit of romance that had the kids shouting and cheering with glee. Hanno even stopped cleaning his weapons to sit and listen. He was enraptured by the way you kept the kids engaged as you weave your tale. The child in your lap started to drift off and you didn’t even hesitate before drawing her closer into your arms and cradling her.
“Queen Kahina is a reminder to all of us,” you declared. “That each of us has the power to stand up for ourselves, to do what’s right, and to be proud of who we are.” You gazed out onto the sea of little heads bobbing their agreement and then looked up to lock gazes with Hanno. For a brief moment, it felt like everything in the world went still. He scarcely knew he was breathing until Jugurtha nudged him. You tore your gaze away and offered a brilliant smile to the children. Clapping your hands together, you shooed them back towards the gathering of homes.
“Your mothers are probably wondering where you’ve gone off to. Now, go home and do some chores to help her out.”
“Oh, but we want another story!” One boy cried out. You huffed out a laugh and shook your head, your veils moving like buttery silk across your skin.
“Only if you finish your chores for the day. I will ask your mother and you know I will. Now, off with you!”
The children dashed off, leaving you with the sleeping babe in your arms. You slowly started to rise, intent on not waking her, when Hanno spoke.
“Here, let me carry your basket.” He stood and took the wicker basket from the ground so you wouldn’t have to worry about carrying both child and items. You regarded him warily at first and Jugurtha had to hide his smile behind his hands.
Truth be told, you were one of the most desired women in the city. You were also one of the least trusting. Your mother desperately tried to set you up with suitor after suitor, but none met your standards. Your father laughed off your mother’s attempts and said that the gods would lead the right man to you. You were older than most women to be unmarried, but you remained steadfast in your belief that the right man would come someday.
And perhaps today was that day.
Jugurtha offered you a short nod to express his approval of Hanno and your suspicious expression melted somewhat. You turned and started to walk towards the village. When you realized that the handsome man with blue eyes wasn’t following, you glanced back at him.
“Are you coming or not?”
Hanno scrambled to catch up and quickly joined your steps, a smile cresting on his face as he asked you about how you were settling into the city.
Hanno cried when his mother sent him away. He sobbed when he fled his hiding place, cried on the boat crossing, and sniffled away into his sleep the first few days of living in Numidia. But he had never wept like he did when they tossed him into the hold of the ship with a Roman brand on his shoulder and a ring that felt infinitely heavy on his finger.
The last thing he saw before plunging into the sea was the blade sliding across your neck. Stuck between the two worlds of consciousness, he saw flickers of a wheatfield stretched before him and, for a moment, saw the outline of your body amongst the stalks. He reached out, his hand passing through where you stood, and then you disappeared from his grasp.
Coming to, he rushed from the sea and towards the city, but two Romans stopped him. He needed to find your body. He needed to see that you were buried properly. He was never as devoted to the gods as you were. You kept idols on the hearth and prayed regularly, but he only found himself turning to the gods at a time like this. But, right now, he found himself praying to Viduus, Libitina, and Proserpina.
Let her soul cross, Mercury. Bring her to the Fields of Elysium. Please. Tell her I will meet her on the other side.
He was forced to kneel next to Jugurtha, stripped of his armor and weapons, and watched as they loaded body after body into a pit. Jugurtha’s gaze never left the growing pile, even as he asked the question that Hanno dreaded.
“She’s gone,” he said, his throat raw from screaming your name across the battlefield. Did it hurt? He wondered. Was it instant? Did you feel pain? His sweet wife who dedicated her life to healing and helping died in such a brutal manner. His hands curled into fists as rage filled his veins. You were supposed to die at an old age, tucked in his arms and surrounded by your children. That’s what he planned that day so long ago when he walked you home, basket in his arms and a babe in yours. You dropped the child off with her mother and he refused to let you take your basket back, instead carrying it to your small house where he checked in on your father, met your mother, and charmed your whole family.
He craned his neck to see the dead lying a few feet away in hopes of catching a glimpse of any sign of you but there were too many dead. Too many lost. He saw the man he had bought silk from two days earlier. The midwife in the village. So many of the soldiers he had helped train.
Hanno glanced beside him and saw a fellow healer who was weeping openly. He leaned closer and asked if she knew anything about what happened to you.
“They took her,” she wailed. “They took her.”
Any grief that remained calcified into pure, hot rage. They took your body? For what sick purpose? To desecrate your corpse? To taint you with their hatred and their delusions of power, even when you were already dead? He started to rise, intent on seeking out your corpse and draping himself over it so that he would still be holding you when they killed him. Jugurtha stopped him with a shaking hand around his wrist.
“I’m sorry,” the leader lamented. “But not like this. This is not how you will die.”
Hanno’s eyes fixed on the man standing in front of the soldiers, in front of the keening mothers and children, in front of the men he had defeated and stripped of their armor to expose their humiliation. Hanno remembered the way he pointed directly at you, encouraging the soldier to keep the bloodshed continuing, and knew what Jugurtha meant.
He was going to kill him, and then he would reunite with you in the afterlife.
“Tell me a story,” Lulit encouraged as the two of you picked herbs from outside the city. The two of you rode out early this morning to gather herbs not grown in the village gardens. Lulit was with child and Jugurtha insisted on a guard coming with you and you glanced over at the man asleep at the base of the tree that the horses were tied to.
You paused for a moment to consider which tale you should tell. Recently, the only stories that came to mind were romances. Your face burned at the thought, but you knew why they were the only things that floated to your memory. A certain blue-eyed man had consumed every waking thought of yours and it was driving you mad.
He was a consummate gentleman and always found ways to visit your family. He started helping your father get his new trading business up and running in the city. He brought your mother fresh wheat to bake bread. He carved toys from wood and willow reeds for your siblings.
Hanno was the man of your dreams. He was exceedingly kind, handsome, and funny. He was sincere and wasn’t putting on some kind of face to impress you. He was just truly nice to everyone he met. You saw him once helping one of the elders bundle their wheat harvest and carry it into their house. Jugurtha had already come by and assured your parents of Hanno’s good nature.
He had started to teach you Latin and how to read and write Phoenician and Numidian. He told you stories from other empires and listened intently when you told him tales your grandmother had told you. The gods had indeed brought the right man, the perfect man. 
“Psyche was one of three daughters of a king and a queen of a far away land. She was renowned for her beauty and praised among the land as the second coming of the goddess of beauty. Her admirers would bring offerings and gifts to her, angering the goddess, who decided that Psyche must be punished.”
A thorn caught on your finger and you let out a hiss of pain as you brought your finger to your lips, sucking the blood away. You began to continue your work and your story when a horn trumpeted across the sky.
The sounds of war.
Your heart leapt into your throat and you immediately looked to Lulit. Her face had drained of color and she traded a worried glance with you. In the time you had lived here, the horns had never sounded.
“We need to move.” Despite being asleep moments earlier, Hanno was already leading the horses to the two of you.
“Who is it?” You knew better than to stall, especially when he wore such a serious expression. He helped you climb onto the back of your horse and paused for only a moment, one of his warm palms resting on your skirt-covered thigh.
“A small war party, by the looks of it. Nothing the defense can’t handle. But we need to get out of the way before they attack. There’s a forest just a few paces away, but we need to get moving.” He ensured that you and Lulit were secured before he climbed onto his own horse. Dust grew in the east and you felt your worry build with it. Hanno tugged at the reins of your horse, urging you to follow. You urged your horse into a gallop and kept close to him, but you still looked over your shoulder to gauge how close the marauders were.
“Hanno.” Your voice carried a warning and he looked back to see a rider closing in on them. He let out an expletive and pointed to the trees that were nearing with every step.
“Go! I’ll find you.” He slowed his horse and fell in line with you, his bright eyes meeting yours. “I swear to you.”
You swallowed against your rising panic and he sent you a reassuring smile before he turned his horse around and rode off in the direction of your pursuer. You looked back to watch as he drew his sword with expert ease.
Focus, you chastised yourself. You need to focus.
Lulit silently followed you as you led the way to the forest. Once the trees began to cloud your vision, you looked back and saw nothing but dirt and sky. He would be okay. He had to be.
Dismounting, you grabbed the reins of your horse and led her further into the forest until you came to a clearing with a good underbrush. You tied the horses and instructed Lulit to dig out some of the underbrush so she could lay down and rest while you brushed out the horses.
“Are we in danger?” she asked. Were you? You had no clue. But you set your shoulders and covered her with the blanket she kept on her saddle.
“Hanno would never let anything happen to us,” you told her. You settled down onto the soft grass next to her. “Let me continue my story. While Psyche’s sisters married, she found herself still unmarried and that worried her father who consulted a seer. The seer predicted an awful outcome for the beautiful daughter, one of a brutish husband in the form of a dragon who came to claim her and whom the gods feared. But truthfully, the goddess of beauty had been so enraged by the people’s devotion to Psyche that she sent her son to enchant her with a hideous creature, but instead found himself falling in love with her.”
Lulit curled up onto her side, cradling her growing belly with her hands as she listened raptly to your story. You spoke of the trials the lovers endured in their pursuit of one another, but as you began to wrap up the story, you found that she had drifted off to sleep.
A branch cracked nearby and you flinched. There was a small knife in your saddlebags that you used for foraging and silently, you crept over to your horse and retrieved it. The leaves rustled and you spun to face whatever beast dared to come close. You held your knife aloft and pointed it in the direction of where the noise was coming from. Oh, you were not brave. You were a farmer’s daughter and a healer. The most you knew with a knife was how to butcher an animal.
“You need to adjust your thumb to the other side,” Hanno said in greeting as he stepped through the forest and into the clearing. “It will give you better control.”
With a ragged sigh of relief, your shoulders fell from their tensed position and you dropped the knife onto the grass below. He stooped to catch it and studied the small blade with a hint of a smile. Droplets of blood stained his face and you carefully examined him for any sign of injuries.
“I am unharmed, my little warrior,” he teased. He rose and handed you the knife once more. “And I will make sure to teach you how to use that.”
“Are you sure you’re alright?” He could easily be lying. Father always brushed off your mother’s worries so as to not incite her own anxieties. Hanno raised his arms from his sides and slowly turned so you could see that he was indeed unharmed. His sword hung from its scabbard and you could see that blood still lingered on its surface.
“Are we safe?”
His eyes darkened and he stepped closer, his hands hovering over your waist. He searched your face for something, you weren’t sure, but dipped his head into a nod. “Aye. I would never let anything happen to you. To you or Lulit.”
“Then rest, soldier. Let me clean your sword.”
He looked as if he wanted to argue, but determination furrowed your brows and Hanno reluctantly unstrapped his sword from his side and handed it to you. This was a task you had witnessed your mother perform before when your father took on anyone trying to attack the farm. Blood was not a foreign thing to you, even if Hanno appeared to want to protect you from it.
You took a rag from your saddle pack and sat down by a tree. Hanno joined you, his back against the bark and his eyes studying the treeline for any disturbance. Slowly and methodically, you ran the rag over his blade and ensured that every last drop of blood and gore was cleaned from it. He searched your face for any sign of fear. Fear of what? Of him? A man who so willingly charged into danger to protect you engendered no fear from you.
“There,” you declared. “Good as new.”
He gratefully accepted the blade from you and placed it back in his scabbard. The sun was starting to set and the glow between the trees created a halo of light around you. He reached up and tucked a stray strand of hair out of your face before curling his knuckles against your jaw and stroking his thumb over your cheek. You let your eyes flutter shut and leaned into his palm, savoring the rough drag of his calloused fingers against your soft skin.
You loved him. Oh, the thought made your heart race and you surged forward. He caught your waist in his calloused hands and let his lips meet yours in a breathless kiss. Hanno groaned against your touch and you pulled away, thinking he was hurt with some injury you hadn’t seen, but he merely cupped your face and pulled you back in so he could nip at your lips and soothe the slight sting with his tongue. You whimpered at his touch and kissed him once again, moving your hands down to trace along the hard lines of his chest. Your hand moved lower and Hanno quickly pulled away from you, one of his hands catching yours and tangling your fingers with his.
“Not yet,” he panted against your cheek. “Not yet.”
Dawn was breaking when you awoke. Your head rested on a blanket that you recognized as Hanno’s while your own draped over you, protecting you from the bitterly cold nights of Numidia. Your soldier sat wide awake and alert beside you and you could tell, from the fatigue weighing down his eyes, that he hadn’t slept a wink through the night. A silent sentry, guarding you and Lulit from any unseen danger.
The blanket fell from your shoulder as you began to sit up and he instinctively reached over to drag it back up your shoulder, bathing you in warmth from both the outside and surging through your insides at his tenderness.
You woke Lulit and the three of you rode back to the city, barely making it in time before a search party headed by Lulit’s husband went out. He wept when he saw his wife and swept her into his arms. Two men offered to take your horses to the stables to care for them and you graciously accepted. Hanno refused to leave your side until he deposited you at your doorstep.
It was still early but you knew your parents would be awake, both from their anxiety and their history as farmers. Your mother let out a shriek when she saw you approach and ran from the doorway to hug you. Hanno squeezed your hand once and made to step away, but you kept your fingers tightly entwined with his.
“I believe you have something to ask of my father,” you explained. His brows raised in surprise and you offered him a shy smile. As your mother ran back to the house to exclaim of your return, you raised your clasped hands so you could press a kiss to his dirt-stained skin.
“Are you sure?” His hesitation had nothing to do with you, but rather in his belief that he was not good enough for you. You laughed and started to drag him in the direction of the house.
“You foolish man.” A boyish grin lit up his face and he followed you inside.
“What happens to me once we reach Rome?”
General Acacius looked up from the letter he was writing and turned to face you. The floor barely made a comfortable place to lay your head, but he had at least given you blankets and removed the chains from your legs. They only went back on when you were on the deck, thanks in part to your failed attempt to jump overboard and sink into the sea.
“My wife will find a place for you in her house,” he explained. You scoffed and picked at the dried blood under your fingernails. You spent your days stitching up and tending to the wounds of Roman soldiers and spent your nights curled up on the floor of this room, dreaming of bright blue eyes and a crooked smile.
“Why? Couldn’t you just drop me off at the nearest brothel and let them rip me apart?” His compassion, minimal at best but still present, confused you. To him, you were barbarian scum. A conquered people. Prisoner of war, spoils, an artifact of his military prowess. He winced at your accusation, knowing that it was true for many military campaigns that the women were subjugated into the slave trade and forced into prostitution. The general refused to meet your eyes and you savored what little bit of power you held over him.
You could picture it now. You would demure yourself and behave in his wife’s house until you found a chance to slit her throat and leave him with the same raw, empty feeling that consumed you.
“You have skills that would be useful,” he muttered. “Your husban-”
“Don’t you dare speak of him,” you hissed. “My husband was a good and kind man. You do not deserve to speak of him.”
“He taught you well,” he continued on. “Lucilla could use someone with your skill set.”
The name made you pause and you tilted your head to the side, brows furrowing as you mentally ran through your memories. “Lucilla, daughter of Aurelius?”
He regarded you with suspicion. “Aye. How do you know of her?”
“Everyone knows of Marcus Aurelius,” you retorted. “I’d be a fool not to.”
A sudden knock on the door drew his attention away from you and he rose to answer it. General Acacius left the room to sort out some sort of issue and left you alone with your thoughts. You drew your knees up to your chest and rested your cheek against your folded arms. If you shut your eyes, you could see his face. If you thought hard enough, you could feel him in your dreams. The rough stubble of his beard. The high plains of his cheekbones. The crooked smile he gave you when he made you laugh.
Lucilla, daughter of Aurelius, you ran the words over and over in your head. Aurelius. Aurelius.
You could only hope that Hanno would forgive you if you delayed your joining with him in the afterlife for a little bit longer.
He slept fitfully on the ship and in the cages. He dreams of your eyes, your laugh, your smile, and wakes with your name on his lips in a strangled cry that he buries into his bicep and lets only a few tears leak out onto his battered skin. 
He has nightmares most nights and the lack of sleep fuels his rage. Dark circles take hold under his eyes and weariness leaves red rims around his blue pupils, making him appear as the wild barbarian they purport him to be. His muscles ache and scream and bruises litter his torso. He bites a monkey back and savors the burning anger that courses through his veins. The crowds cheer and shout and applaud his fury, but he pays them no mind. All he focuses on is going back to his cell and dreaming of you once more.
Killing men has never been an issue for him. He was raised a fighter, even in Numidia where he helped Jugurtha lead their forces. He fought in skirmishes and battles. When he met you, it brought another reason to keep the fight going. He refused to let a single person pass into the gates of the city when you were seeking protection inside. He had failed you, and every new scar on his body was merely penance.
Ravi chastises him for the way that he seeks out injury, but the man doesn’t refuse to help him. In an opium-fueled haze, Hanno tells him quietly that his wife was a healer. She was exceedingly kind and gentle. Too gentle for him. He was scared he would break her with his brutish nature, but she was also enduringly strong. A stray tear slips down his cheek and he tosses the opium aside in favor of feeling the pain and knowing that it pales in comparison to the ache in his chest. His grief builds and compounds into this sickening version of him that he cannot recognize. The blood of other men stains his skin, no matter how hard he scrubs in the baths. Even when the iron-thick substance is gone, he can still see it.
Macrinus brought the finest courtesans by his cell, but he refused them everytime. Once, the girl shared a similar hair color as you and he invited her into his cell, but merely let her rest on his cot while he sat at his desk and sketched what he could remember of your face on thin papyrus.
When he looked into the stands and saw your murderer seated with his mother, his rage calcified into his heart. With every kill, he pictured your pale face crying out for him. With every breath, he reminded himself of his failure to protect you. His mother had the audacity to reason with him.
“Do you have a family?” Lucilla asked.
He says your name with the reverence afforded to the gods and then hisses out that you were dead and taken from him by her husband. How dare she try to call her son home when she shares a bed with that monster? Ferality consumed him and his thirst for revenge. He meant what he said to Macrinus. Only Acacius’ head will quench this fire in his blood. For a sickening moment, he wants his mother to feel the way he does.
There are times when the night is darkest that his mind descends into the throes of the deepest depression and he wonders about how you would feel if you saw him like this. There is one nightmare that plays over and over again in his mind. He is in the Colosseum and the crowd is cheering in their bloodlust. The gates open and he steps out to face his next opponent, only to find you standing in the sand with your hands outstretched towards him. In this dream, he can’t stop himself from raising his blade an-
He woke up screaming.
Hanno doesn’t trust Macrinus within an inch of his life, but he trusts that he’ll bring him Acacius and that…that will be enough.
“Can I tell you a story?” Hanno whispered into your hair.
The wedding was an all-day event. You looked resplendent with flowers woven in your hair and layers of colorful fabric adorning your body. It felt as though the whole city came out to celebrate your union and the dancing, food, and music flowed for hours. Jugurtha clapped his hands on Hanno’s shoulders and congratulated him. A knowing glint flashed in the older man’s eyes and Hanno was eternally grateful for the man’s meddling.
Your father had tears in his eyes when he took your hand from his and placed it into Hanno’s, but they were tears of joy. When discussing the marriage negotiations and dowry, your father declared that there was no one greater for his daughter. In his vows, Hanno promised to protect and provide for you until his very last breath, one that he would take with you in his arms at an old age, with your children around you.
As the night grew longer, the crowds began to thin out. Parents took sleeping children home and the elders slipped away so they could rise early and start their daily chores. The fires began to burn low and Hanno looked over to you, only to have his breath catch in his throat at the realization.
His wife. His wife. Your lovely face was now his to wake up to every morning and your sweet laughter was his to elicit. Izim was telling some tall tale about his adventures as a sentry, but Hanno didn’t hear a single word. He ignored the hoots and hollers of his fellow soldiers and friends as he left their group and strode towards you.
The women around you tittered and giggled as he approached and it drew your attention away from whatever Seble was telling you. You barely had time to react when he suddenly scooped you into his arms. Hanno easily cradled you to him, your long veils swirling around the two of you, and he made his way towards the new house he had built with the help of your father and a few friends. The party cheered and you hid your laughter into the crook of his neck.
Hanno stopped in the doorway and set you gently onto your feet so you could examine your new home. Someone, your mother, you presumed, had already set some lanterns alight in the house and a clay jar of flowers sat on the small wooden table in the center of the room. It was a small house with the bed on one side and a small kitchen on the other. You traced your hand along the furniture that you knew he constructed himself. Your dowry chest laid at the foot of the bed already and a loom was on the wall. Your husband had done all of this.
The word made your throat squeeze with a level of affection you had never experienced before. He watched you carefully from the doorway, but you could see tension in the line of his shoulders and how his hands fidgeted until he clasped them behind his back. The flames from the lanterns made his eyes glow and heightened the smooth planes of his face. You reached up and unclasped your veils, letting them pool at your feet before you took a step forward.
He met you halfway, his hands going to settle on your waist as you nestled into his strong arms. Your hands came up to rest on the rough fabric of his tunic and you could feel his heart beat wildly under the tips of your fingers.
“My husband,” you breathed to the heavens. You wanted the gods to know that this man was yours. He had placed an iron ring on your finger and you savored the weight of it, the press of it against your skin. Hanno’s lips lifted in the barest hint of a grin, but his eyes took on almost burning intensity.
With nimble fingers, you released the clasps of his tunic yet kept your gaze locked on his as the fabric pooled to the ground. Hanno’s breaths grew ragged as you settled your hands back onto the chiseled muscle of his chest. For a moment, nothing happened. You just stared at one another as the air electrified with palpable energy. You had no idea where this boldness emerged from, but you slid your hand down his bicep, along his arm, and then to his wrist where you clasped it and raised his hand to rest on your breast. He swallowed so hard you could see his throat bob and just the simple evidence of his arousal made your skin burn.
“My wife,” he said hoarsely and untied your dress.
Hanno sucked in a shuddering breath as the fabric fell away from your body and joined his on the floor. He stroked his hands over your quivering flesh and stepped forward so that his body pressed against the length of yours. You felt him harden against your thigh as he leaned down to capture your lips in his. The two of you had kissed plenty of times, from small chaste pecks to that heated moment in the forest, but this felt entirely new and you welcomed it. He nibbled at your lips and explored your mouth with the desperation of a dying man searching for water. You moaned your approval which encouraged him and he let one of his hands drift down to cup your breast.
Hanno’s touch made your skin light on fire with every simple brush. How were you supposed to act when the man strutted around shirtless most of the time and built your house? Some of the older women in the city gossiped about their husbands. They told you about how it hurt, about the way he took without giving, and how they hated it.
From the delicate way Hanno touched you and the tender press of his lips against your pulse point, you knew that this would be different. He bent down and hauled you up against him, your legs wrapping around his waist for security, but you knew he would never drop you. You slid your arms around his neck, pulling your chest flush with his and he let his head fall back with a sinful groan, exposing the column of his throat. Eagerly, you licked a stripe up against his sweat-tinged skin and savored the taste of salt, musk, and man.
“By the gods, you will be the end of me, my little wife.” His teeth enclosed around the hinge of your jaw and you let your head fall to the side with a little sigh. Hanno nipped at the skin of your neck and you jolted against him, causing his throbbing cock to brush against you. Hanno squeezed his eyes shut at the sensation that wracked his body and you turned your head so he was facing you. Running your thumb along his jaw, you pulled your husband into another kiss and then pulled his bottom lip between your teeth. He sucked in a sharp breath and his hold tightened on you, sending a zing of pain mixed with pleasure down your spine.
“Take me to bed, husband,” you panted against his mouth. “Claim me as yours.”
Furs and silk lined the bed and softened your fall. You marveled at the way he prepared everything for you, even bringing over the blankets you wove for your marriage chest and setting them on the bed. He planted himself over you, his chest rising and falling with every heavy breath he took and you stole a glance down his broad chest to the heavy manhood that stood proud between his thighs. Your body pulsed with want even as your mind protested the idea of taking his length. He sensed your apprehension and leaned down to place a gentle kiss against your temple, your brow, both eyelids, and then your lips once more.
“I cannot promise it to be painless,” he said. “But I will do everything in my power to make sure you find bliss too.”
One of his hands snaked down to your most intimate place and your eyes widened with shock as he brushed the pad of his finger along the seam of your cunt. Your legs spread further apart instinctively and he kissed you in thanks for your invitation. A gasp escaped you as one of his fingers slid past your entrance and he kissed away your shock, even as you felt the rough and calloused pad of his finger slide up and press against some part of you that had you seeing stars. A little whimper from you had him pausing and he immediately pulled his hand away, eliciting a low whine from his wife. Hanno couldn’t stop his cocky smile that spread across his face before he touched that part of you again. His finger drew a circle over your flesh and your hips canted up, a mewl spilling past your lips and your breath catching. He stole a kiss, then another as he sent electricity up your spine and shocks scattered through your bones.
“You are magnificent,” he murmured just as he slipped another finger into your aching cunt. For a moment, you felt a hint of discomfort and bit your lip to refrain from making a sound. Hanno frowned and pulled your lip out from between your teeth. Some small part of you whispered ugly words and lies into your mind in an attempt to push his affection away. He only wanted you because other men did. You were merely a token to conquer. He needed a wife before he could get a concubine.
“Let me hear those pretty sounds.” He kissed the corner of your lips and you turned your head to see him properly once more. His eyes burned with a hunger you had seen before like in the forest or when he saw you carry one of the village babes on your hip. Hanno cheek pressed against your own and he whispered into your ear as he sank one finger into you and then two. He told you how proud he was of you, how good you were for him, how precious you were, as he pulled little cries of pleasure from you. You tightened around his fingers and he leaned back and watched your face as your body twitched and seized with the electric shocks of pleasure. A proud smile captured his face and he craned his head down to kiss you again and again and again. You climbed higher, higher, higher but then he abruptly pulled his hand from you, leaving you empty and aching. 
“I know, I know,” he groaned in that deep timbre bass that wracked through your body. Hanno rubbed a gentle circle into your outer thigh and shifted himself until he was kneeling between your spread legs. He grasped his cock in one hand and pressed his other hand to your hip, holding you in place under his heavy gaze. You squirmed as his eyes raked down your naked body and the little thoughts began to creep in once more, but he silenced them with one word.
“Divine.” Hanno leaned down and laid the flat of his tongue along your cunt. Your back arched off the bed with a choked out gasp and for a moment, you thought you died and entered the afterlife. He chuckled against your inner thigh and pressed a kiss to your pussy before sitting back on his heels. He stroked his thick length twice before moving closer to you. He nestled his face against your hair and inhaled the sweet scent of rose petals. His cheek rested on your temple, and he shocked you with his question.
“Can I tell you a story?”
You choked back a laugh and kissed the shell of his ear. “I suppose.” While you were the typical storyteller, you would always accept whatever he gave you.
“There was a king of the island of Ithaca by the name of Ulysses*. He was sent to fight in the Trojan War and on the way home, was blown off course. The journey home took over ten years and was filled with countless obstacles and dangers.” You gasped as the blunt head of his cock slid past your entrance and Hanno inhaled deeply. “Odysseus had a wife, the queen of Ithaca, named Penelope. A hundred suitors from the various lands and tribes came in an attempt to woo her and take her hand in marriage. Everyone thought Odysseus to be dead.”
He rocked his hips and his thick length began to split you open and your lips parted in a silent moan. Any air that was in your lungs seemed to evaporate as he filled you fully. Hanno swallowed your shaky whimper with a sweet kiss. You clawed for purchase against his chest, your limbs liquifying when he pulled out. Hanno caught your hand in his and flipped your hand over so he could pepper kisses along the inside of your wrist.
“Penelope was a devoted wife and ever faithful. She never doubted that Odysseus was alive and would come back to her. She lied to the suitors and told them that she would marry them when she finished weaving a funeral shroud. But she undid her work each night.” This time, his intrusion didn’t have the burn like the last thrust. Instead, his cock dragged against your walls in such a way that had your eyes rolling back into your head.
Hanno groaned as he started a steady thrust of his hips. He moved your hands above your head and entangled his fingers with yours, squeezing them in assurance as he fucked you. The pleasure burned so hot in your stomach and consumed your entire being. Everytime he thrust in, it felt like he was carving you out and branding you with his claim and oh, how you wanted this. He built this house for you and your future and even though he put a roof over your head, you saw stars with every touch against your skin.
“Ha-Hann…” You whined as he hit a certain spot that made your head spin. “Hanno.”
He frowned and slowed his thrusts and he touched your cheek, his thumb rubbing away the tear that you didn’t realize slipped down. “Does it hurt?”
You yanked him closer until his nose was touching yours. Your legs wrapped around his hips and he bottomed out in surprise.
 “Don’t you dare stop.” He grinned that reckless, crooked smile of his and swept your lips into a bruising kiss as he fucked every last thought out of your head. His name became a prayer that you chanted to the skies as he took you higher and higher until that coil that wrapped in your stomach snapped. You clenched around his cock and your body seized up as your orgasm washed over you. Hanno let out a guttural, animalistic groan and he spilled his seed into you, flooding you with warmth.
Silence enveloped the two of you, only the heavy exhales from exertion permeating the bubble that surrounded you. Hanno’s body relaxed and he caught himself before he put all of his weight on you. Rolling to the side, his arm came up to curl around your front, and he pulled you to his chest. Nose to nose, you met his gaze and let your breath mingle with his.
“Penelope didn’t falter in her devotion,” you said hoarsely. “Did she?”
His hand drifted up and down the raised gooseflesh on your arm and he reached over to draw one of the furs over you. “Aye, she didn’t.”
You tossed the edge of the fur over him and kissed him once again. “I will always remain steadfast.”
His lips met your temple and he tucked your head under his chin. “And I shall always come for you. No matter what it takes.”
Acacius lead you into the villa, the shackles and a new plate around your neck indicating your designation as slave. Lucilla immediately greeted him with an embrace and you looked away, your heart shattering at the sight. Quiet words were exchanged between the two before Acacius paused and stepped back to display you.
“She is from Numidia,” he explained. “She has skills in healing and I felt she would be a good addition to the household.”
Lucilla approached you and took in your sorry state. You felt bile rise in your throat as you bowed your head to the woman, but she stopped you with a raised hand.
“What is your name?” she asked you in Phoenician. You paused before answering her in your second tongue. That’s when you saw her eyes and realized, with a jolt, that she was indeed the woman you had heard of.
“Leta,” Lucilla called for another slave. “Come. Show her to the baths and give her a fresh chiton. Acacius, unchain her.”
He obeyed his wife’s command, but the slate remained. Perhaps you would wear it for the rest of your, hopefully short, life. Leta, an older woman, silently beckoned you to follow her deeper into the villa where a few slave women were gathered together over a pool of warm water.
“Who is this?” one of them asked in Latin.
“A Barbarian whore for the general, I presume,” Leta replied. “He brought her from Numidia. Thing hasn’t had a bath in her whole life.”
You remained silent, hands clasped before you, even as Leta pointed towards the bath. “You. Wash.” You pretended not to understand and she huffed out an annoyed breath and marched off, leaving you to strip out of your ruined and bloody dress from home and step into the water. You didn’t want to wash the gore off of your skin. Not when it was your last reminder of home. Of him.
Taking a moment to look around, you tried to picture what it was like living here in all its splendor. Leta returned and tossed a dress for you onto the edge of the tile and you stared at it blankly. She turned her back to you and started to gossip with the other girls. Your hands scrubbed at your skin, but your ears picked up all that they were saying. Gladiator games, senators, the emperors, it was all banal and boring.
But you found it all invaluable.
When night fell, you slipped out from the tiny cot you had been given in the slave quarters and silently made your way through the halls. Mosaics lined the walls and depicted everything from myths to actual battles. You stopped at the bust of Marcus Aurelius and stared at it for a moment. Shaking your head, you moved on to the hall that everyone had pointedly walked past and Leta explained was off-limits. Or as she said, “no touch”, because she thought that your supposed inability to speak Latin was also an indication of your idiocy.
You pushed open the doors and entered the chambers. Dust covered every inch of the place, as if no one had been in here for years. You carefully made your way over a broken tile and into the bedchamber where the sheets were still unmade and a book lay open on the desk. Turning slowly, you took in the whole of the room with an unsteady inhale.
“The gates of hell are open night and day,” you whispered under your breath. The words were etched onto the top of the wall. “Smooth the descent, and easy is the way: But to return, and view the cheerful skies, In this the task and mighty labor lies.” As you spoke, you could almost feel the presence of him at your back, his rough and low voice breathing the words into your ear.
You fled from the room, unable to bear it.
You almost made it back across the atrium when Lucilla emerged from seemingly out of nowhere. The two of you paused and you quickly lowered your head in deference.
“I hope you weren’t trying to escape,” she said gently. “Acacius told me that you were recently made a widow.”
The wince on your face was visible even in the moonlight and she stepped forward, her hands clasping over yours in comfort. She spoke her next words in Latin. “I am sorry. These meaningless deaths are foolish emperors playing war without considering the human cost of it.” The older woman patted your hand and made to leave, but your voice stopped her.
“Your slaves do not respect you,” you spoke in Latin. “Leta spreads vicious rumors about you and she said she has ties with some of the senators. Your allies are playing you and your plan is shaky at best.”
She whirled around to face you and you jutted your chin out in defiance, your eyes flashing with something dangerous. “In Numidia, my husband was the soldier, Domina. But I was the politician.”
Macrinus delivered on his promise. Acacius faced off with four soldiers in the Colosseum before Hanno was given a taste of vengeance and oh, did he savor it. Acacius ordered your death. Now, Hanno had the chance to ensure you were honored properly.
But Acacius stood across from him, sword on the ground, and accepted his death with a stoicism that Hanno only dreamed of possessing. The crowd roared and swelled with indignation after Hanno demanded to know their morals, but he was ushered away before he joined his father in dying in this ring.
He was granted the chance to see his mother one last time before her execution for treason and his slaughter in the arena. Lucilla told him of his father and he remembered meeting Maximus and how kind he was, even in the jaws of death. When his mother meets him for the last time, his only thought is how much Lucilla would like you.
She gave him two gifts in parting.
One, his grandfather’s ring.
Two, a lock of hair. And not just any…
Lucilla smiled sadly. “Acacius took her from Numidia to be a healer and didn’t realize she was your wife. She is safe, Lucius, and under the care of my household. I’m afraid I put it together too late, and she isn’t aware that you are here.”
For a moment, the rage subsided and he heard only a shrill ringing in his ears, as though he took a heavy blow to the head. Lucius turned the hair over in his hand and raised it to his nose, smelling a faint hint of rose petals.
I shall always come for you. No matter what it takes.
His mother was taken back to his cell and he took a moment to curl his palm around this fragment of you and press it to his chest to guard it from the world.
And then he called for Ravi.
Your hands remained steady when you slit Leta’s throat. You did so quietly, in the darkness of an alleyway. Blood never fazed you before, and the taking of a life was no different now. As far as you were concerned, this woman was one of the reasons why your Hanno was dead. Was it a rational thought? Perhaps not. But rationality would come another day.
The Colosseum roared with fury and you tried not to flinch at the deafening sound as you slipped in through the gates below, into the pens with the animals and gladiators. Chaos reigned above and below the world’s largest stadium so it was easy to blend in with others. The cloak you stole from Leta made you appear to be a fellow slave working amongst the masses. It never failed to amaze you how they called you a barbarian when they fought men to the death for their entertainment.
Your fingers skated over the smooth wood that curved over your spine and you felt a little better knowing that it was on you. The games were already underway with a few prisoners being devoured by Barbary lions as the crowd screamed for their blood to spill. You slipped around a few courtesans that lingered in the hall and passed the raised dais where three maidens were chained. Pushing on, you found a small corridor that was unoccupied and slipped in between the stones to hide from any roaming eyes.
The noise increased and you knew what was coming. Lucilla would be executed and Macrinus was to blame. The lanista was the mastermind of all of this, and you knew firsthand what war could do to people. You refused to let Lucilla die and, as much as you hated the Romans for what they took from you, the innocent children in the streets would die.
After this, you promised yourself, you would join Hanno.
Footsteps rushed past your hiding spot and when it quieted down in the hallway, you took that as a chance to peek out and see if you had an opening. You slipped out into the hall and darted towards one of the gates that was partly open. A bloodbath was the only word to describe what was happening in the Colosseum. You blanched at the sight of Lucilla tied to the dais, but it seemed as though the gladiators had it well in hand.
Removing the bow from your back, you notched an arrow onto the string and inhaled deeply. Macrinus was not hard to stop, thanks to his place behind Emperor Caracalla, but you didn’t have a clear shot. The crowd was turning on the Praetors and more soldiers entered the Colosseum on horseback. One Praetor nearly took the head off of a gladiator and you turned your bow in that direction.
Breathe in, aim, fire as you breathe out, Jugurtha had instructed. Keep your arm steady, your aim true, and your mind clear. There is no time to panic, just shoot.
The arrow sailed through the air and straight through the Praetor’s shoulder, knocking him off his horse and to the ground. You drew another arrow and started to aim towards Macrinus once more, but this time he was standing up. Caracalla was slumped over dead in front of him and Macrinus had his own bow in his hand.
Numidians were excellent horsemen and archers. Before you ever met Hanno, before you even bled for the first time, you were trained in the art of horsemanship and archery. Indeed your husband vowed his protection, but you were not one to go down without a fight. He taught you how to manipulate a knife, where to aim on the body, but Hanno never came close to your familiarity with a bow.
Your next arrow arched through the air and collided with Macrinus’ shot. The wood splintered midair and you loaded a third, but the lanista fled the stands before you could take another shot. It gave a gladiator the chance to free Lucilla and pass her to another gladiator, a hulking beast of a man. The gladiator gave chase to Macrinus and you focused your attention on your subject at hand.
There had to have been a reason the gods kept you alive and took Hanno. Clearly, it was to protect your husband’s mother.
“Are you ever going to tell me what you’re hiding from me?”
His hand stilled from where it had been absentmindedly stroking your thigh. Hanno came home from the field and immediately drew you into his lap, inhaling your sweet smell and letting his hands roam all over your body. You savored his touch, but marriage had sharpened your mind regarding his mannerisms. Something was bothering him.
Hanno sighed and he nuzzled his nose against your shoulder. You let him have this moment, but you would weasel the truth out of him, someway or another.
“Is it another woman? A concubine?” you asked, your voice hushed and wounded. He laid a kiss against your skin and shook his head.
“Rome is moving closer,” he finally said. You turned so you could see his face and cupped his chin, drawing his head up to meet your gaze. He blinked up at you with those sky blue eyes of his and nestled into your palm until he could lay a gentle kiss there.
“My name, my real name,” he whispered, “is Lucius Verus Aurelius and I am the prince of Rome.”
The first thing he did after ascending his rightful place as Emperor of Rome was go to his mother’s villa.
Lucilla was fine, a small gash on her bicep and shaken up, but fine. He tried to be a good son, but she could tell his focus was on anywhere but her. Lucilla directed him to the gardens and that is where he found you.
The Roman dress was different from what he was used to seeing, but you still covered your head with a veil when praying to your gods. Head tilted towards the heavens, hands outstretched, you made a beautiful image of devotion.
Your feet inched closer to the edge of the cliff.
“Forgive me, my love, for being so weak that I could not do this sooner,” you said. Tears coursed down your cheeks and stained the fabric of your chiton with damp tracks. You muttered a mixture of prayer and apology and he strained to hear it.
“Give me the strength to commit this final act, oh gods, grant me this. I have protected his mother and granted her the life he was not spared. Please, oh Hanno, let me see you in the afterlife. I am tired, so tired of only seeing you in my dreams.”
“Step back from the edge, my heart.” His voice came out in a tremble.
“Hanno,” you whispered. “Forgive me for being so weak. Forgive me for failing you. I’m sorry.”
“You’ve been nothing but strong.” A ferocity claims his words. “Step back from the edge.”
“We made a promise,” you pleaded. “We go as one. Let me join you, please.”
You raise one foot over the rocky cliff and he lashed out before he could think. He grabbed your wrist and pulled you back so hard that the both of you tumbled to the ground. Quickly, Lucius kneeled by your side to search for any injury.
“Open your eyes,” he ordered. This was the afterlife. It must be. You obeyed his command to find those bright blue eyes that haunted your dreams.
“Am I finally dead?”
“Not for a long, long time.”
No, this wasn’t the afterlife. Blood caked his skin and scars littered his bare arms. He had been muscular before but now he appeared to be only thick, corded muscle. Your hands came up to rest on his neck and you examined his face. The same freckles. Same lines by his eyes. Same long eyelashes.
Trailing your hands down along his arms, you skirted around the obvious injuries he had until your fingers brushed something new, something entirely foreign to you that resided on his shoulder.
A brand.
And with that, the dam within you shattered. The wails of a widow finally escaped your chest and you let out an agonized scream as you curled in on yourself. Hanno gathered you into his arms and buried his face into the crook of your neck. Hot tears slid down his cheeks and onto your skin. Your hands scrambled to find purchase on the armor that still adorned his body and you eventually settled on cradling the back of his head with one hand and grasping his forearm with the other.
“I am so sorry,” he wept. “If I had known you were alive, I would have come for you sooner.” He wrenched the slave plate from your neck and kissed the places where the chain had rubbed your skin raw.
All the agony of grief and rage and terror from the last month spilled out of him in broken, gasping sobs. His precious wife was alive and in his arms. Numidia had fallen, but now he had the chance to protect her with all the power and might of Rome. He could now have armies at his beck and call, coffers of coins brought to him, and enemies assassinated but the true power laid in his arms.
His little wife was right. He was the soldier, the muscle, the physical strength. But the reason he fought and killed, the reason he kept going even when every part of his body screamed to give up, was because of her. As far as he was concerned, she had the power to raze cities and command armies. All she had to do was ask him.
“Is this real?” you breathed once your sobs and trembling ceased. He pulled you into his lap and almost began crying once again at the feel of your supple body against his.
“It’s real,” he assured you before he bent down and kissed you. Despite the blood that coated his skin, you savored the taste of him. You never thought you would get this again. Maybe the gods did bless you.
He kept you pressed against his side as you made your way back into the villa. One of the slaves nearly dropped her tray at the sight before her and ran to grab Lucilla. The stately woman swept into the courtyard and met you both there.
“Lucius,” she exclaimed. “I take it that this is your wife.”
“Yes.” His gaze never strayed from your face. “This is her.”
You instinctively went to bow to Lucilla but she stopped you with a gentle hand on your arm.
“You are not my slave any longer,” she assured you. “Not only did you save my life, but you are now my daughter and also Augusta.”
Hanno, Lucius, you reminded yourself, stood in all his resplendent glory, covered in dirt and blood with his gladius hanging from his sheath. How different the two of you were now, yet still fit like the gods made you for each other. Your small house was gone. Your home was subjugated. Your family and friends in the afterlife. But Lucius was still here and still breathing. That made it all worth it.
He might be the Emperor of Rome now and you, the Empress, but he was still your charming soldier, your devoted husband. This, you decided, would make an excellent story someday.
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lustlovehart · 3 months ago
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Heartslaybul : Riddle Rosehearts [Mission Failed]
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“Oho, our Trickster can’t commit to such a crime! Such a softheart filled with empathy… Magnifque! The time with them will surely prove to be beautiful…!” The man of shadows watches you from a distance, a fawning admiration growing for the Hunter he, and a few others, had fostered deep in their obsessions for quite some time.
Truly, He knows you’ll live long enough to see all of them through to the end, for the shadows of night had told him of fate themself!
My, How he can’t wait to see what you do for these 7 missions.
The terror watches as you kneel down in front of the ghostly tyrant, placing your only means of attack right in front of him, your hands placed where Riddles own would’ve been had he been in a tangible physical form.
“I put it down.”
“I can see that…”
Goodness, a Monster Hunter with a weakness for Monsters? Rook must tell the tale to the rest of them.
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At this point, all the spoilers (Though none of them make sense without context) I do for the Monster!Twst au will ruin the story, but I couldn’t resist making this after finishing Riddles portion. Even with all these sneak peaks there are still major points in the plot that I hooe people will enjoy ♥︎
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mydadleft471 · 4 months ago
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A Jester Indeed
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Summary: You've heard tales of Messmer the Impaler from other Tarnished. They say he's a monster, that his flame will burn through your armor to the bone, and that he is not to be trifled with. So what happens when you, a not-so-serious individual, fight the Impaler and show him mercy?
Spoilers for Elden Ring and Shadow of the Erdtree. Some warnings of violence, fighting, blood, and a stupid Tarnished.
This was a request from anonymous! They requested, "Messmer with a Tarnished reader who chose to spare him at the end of their battle, and she frequently comes by to annoy him." This was so fun, thanks anon! I wasn't sure how to incorporate the Tarnished coming back to annoy him, so I just made her a little shit whenever possible lmao. Hope you like it!
As always, thank you for reading, liking, reblogging, and commenting! I've gotten back into writing because of everyone's continued love and support and I can't begin to thank you guys enough! <3
You were so in over your head.
Traveling to the Land of Shadow was an ordeal all by itself. As you carved your path of carnage throughout the Lands Between, you’d killed many. It did not matter what they were; if they didn’t want to talk it out, you knew there was only one way it would end. No matter how many times you died, which had to be in the hundreds by now, you would come back and try again. Victory had always tasted so sweet. 
As did the amount of runes some bosses dropped.
Seeking out the Lord of Blood was certainly a task, but you had also found the husk of Miquella, Malenia’s twin brother forever cursed to be a child. Disgust must’ve been obvious on your features as Mohg appeared out of a pool of blood and referred to Miquella as dearest. You had a feeling you wouldn’t mind ending the Lord of Blood.
You did mind, however, the amount of bloodflame he threw at you. His trident could kill you in one hit if you weren’t careful, and it did, many times. Eventually though, he fell just like the rest. After you lit the site of Grace near Miquella’s cocoon and sat down, you noticed someone standing a few feet in front of you. They were donned in gold and black armor with an ornately embroidered white cloak. Carefully, you rose, ready to fight if necessary.
She introduced herself as Needle Knight Leda, in service to Miquella the Kind. She told you that if you wished to travel to the Land of Shadow, all you needed to do was touch the withered arm dangling lifelessly outside of the cocoon. Noticing your hesitation to follow someone you had just met, she tells you of her compatriots that would offer you assistance when you arrived.
You were never one to shy away from challenge and adventure, so you rested your hand upon the cold, much larger one. In an instant, your vision went white and suddenly you stood in an unfamiliar place. It almost reminded you of where you first woke up after crossing the fog, but it was more foreboding. You shrugged off the feeling of anxiety and started up the hill in front of you.
After stepping out into the open and seeing the vast landscape before you, you knew you had to explore every inch of this place. You would discover why this place was hidden, and you would almost certainly fight challengers tougher than you could imagine. The thought alone sent shivers of anticipation down your spine. With Torrent by your side, you embarked on your journey throughout the Land of Shadow.
That anticipation that had once set your soul ablaze was now fear coursing through your veins. After weeks of fighting, you had reached the Shadow Keep, home of Messmer the Impaler, who was another of Queen Marika’s children. Messmer’s guards and knights were no joke, and you had met your demise at their hands more times than you could count. But you had persisted and cut your way through his numbers, and here you were: in front of an imposing and cold metal door that would certainly lead to your number of deaths reaching the thousands.
Everything you had heard about Messmer was terrifying. You were unsure if you would actually best him. Many other Tarnished you’d met along your travels spoke of his flame, scorching and unnatural, searing them down to the bone before they were impaled on Messmer’s spear.
You tried to keep your spirits high. You had fought and beat Radahn, once known as the mightiest demigod of the Shattering. You’d killed Mohg. You even killed Miquella’s sister, Malenia, the Goddess of Rot.
So why were you standing here shaking like it was your first encounter with combat?
You sighed and knew you’d have to will yourself to open the door in front of you. Throwing caution to the wind and ignoring your nerves begging you to turn back, you pushed the heavy metal door open and stood in the doorway. You flinched and closed your eyes, expecting your death to be immediate. But you were fine.
Taking a few tentative steps into the room, you realized that it was almost entirely dark. A few candles sputtered weakly along the floor, but that was it. Perhaps the Impaler was out?
Your hopeful thoughts quickly died as the room lit up. Hundreds of candles sparked to life within mere seconds. You drew your weapon and looked around the room, your heart beating wildly against your ribcage.
“Mongrel intruder.”
A low, stern voice echoed throughout the room, sending shivers down your spine. Looking towards the center of the room, you shrieked when you saw a red snake hovering in front of you. It wasn’t poised to strike however, so you, although a stupid idea, reached out to pat its head.
“Thou’rt Tarnished, it seemeth.” 
The snake began to slink away from your outstretched hand. You saw a large towering figure sat on a throne in the very back of the room.
Messmer the Impaler.
“I am, yes. Why does that matter?” Your voice shakes and comes out weak.
He stands up, seemingly ignoring you. You realize how he towers over you.
“Mother, wouldst thou truly lordship sanction in one so bereft of light?” He does not sound amused.
“I don’t want to fight you. ” You realize that might not seem convincing with your sword drawn.
“Yet… my purpose standeth unchanged.” He saunters towards you. 
You really shouldn’t be here.
“Those stripped of the Grace of Gold shall all meet death. In the embrace of Messmer’s flame.” From his hand, fire erupts and swirls, but it’s unlike anything you’ve ever seen before. It’s darker, a deep crimson with black tendrils dancing around like snakes. It’s beautiful, yet horrifying.
“But I can see sites of Grace! There’s one right outside your door!” You plead with him, your voice unnaturally high with fear. He pauses for a second, mulling over your words. Then his brow hardens and his gleaming gold eye narrows.
“The Tarnished, graceless and stricken, is also a liar, it seemeth.”
You were stupid and brave, but a liar? That crossed a line.
With his words as your only warning, he leaps into the air, creating an inferno of raging fire. He slams down next to you and you barely have time to roll out of the way. The explosion clouds your vision, and you don’t catch him hurtling towards you. His spear rams through your stomach as if you weren’t wearing armor, and you scream. Your hands grasp the handle where it impales you and it’s sticky with blood. Your blood.
Messmer comes closer as you fall to the floor. You have to admit, he’s quite handsome, even with your blurred vision. You don’t think telling him that would spare you.
“I don’t want to fight.” Your voice comes out weak and you spit out blood on the floor next to you. You’re beginning to fade.
His eye glows a blinding gold as he stands above you. He seethes with disgust.
“Then thou shalt run. Thine wishes are an impossibility. But rest assured, Tarnished,” he spits the word like an insult, and brings his face closer to yours. “The Impaler will see to it that thy fate never cometh to fruition. Thou shalt perish here, as many times as necessary.” 
With those words, you fade away and return to the site of Grace outside his door. You lay there in stunned silence for a few seconds before you dare to sit up. Looking towards the fog wall in front of you, you question yourself. Could you really defeat Messmer? He’s made his intentions crystal clear and you know that each time you face him, it will end in your painful death. 
No, you say to yourself. You take a few deep breaths and make a conscious effort to not give into the fear he instilled in you. That’s what he wants. He wants you to be afraid to face him, to give him the upper hand. But you won’t do that. Sure, he’s a demigod that’s launched an endless crusade on an entire race of people and has a curse that’s gotten him shunned from his Mother’s good graces, but you’re really good at fighting. And you’re persistent as hell.
Standing, you draw your weapon once more and walk through the fog wall.
He’s returned to his throne, and once he sees you, he grips his spear and stands.
“I warned thee, Tarnished. All thou wilt gain here is an acute understanding of agony.”
“I’m not afraid of you. I’ve faced demigods before and won. I’ve died countless times and came back. This fight won’t be any different.”
He is taken aback by your confidence, but he quickly regains his composure. His face hardens and he leaps into the air once again, flame encompassing his form.
“So be it.”
You dodge his inferno and sidestep him as he rushes at you. You have a feeling he uses his fire to disorient you and shroud himself. You would be wise to keep the distance between you two as close as possible.
“A spear is a horrible weapon for close combat!” You holler at him and see his eye narrow. You’ve successfully pissed him off.
He ignites his spear and soars through the air, then rushes at you with multiple jabs, and you successfully dodge all but one of his attacks. He slams down into the ground next to you, and right as you reach for your flask, a myriad of spears burst from the ground and quickly end you. As your vision fades, you see him above you once more, looking down at you with something you could almost call pity.
You re-enter his arena with little time between your attempts. Though he manages to best you over ten times, you are growing more certain in his attack patterns, and you can seamlessly dodge and punish most of his moves. On your 16th try, you’ve managed to only get hit twice throughout the fight so far, and you still have 9 remaining charges in your flask. You know he’s beginning to worry from the way his attacks grow more and more desperate. He stops charging deliberate moves and instead swings wildly at you in an attempt to kill you instantly.
After side-stepping his barrage and rolling through his summoned spears, you quickly deliver a swipe that cuts his stomach and sends him to his knees. You breathe out heavily and watch his every move with your sword at the ready in front of you.
“Bested, by a meek Tarnished…” His voice radiates with pain and humiliation. He looks at you, his eye dimmer than usual. 
“Give up. I don’t want to kill you.” You hope he doesn’t push you to deal a final blow.
He weakly stands up, using his spear to hold him upright. He turns away, facing a giant statue of Marika holding a baby. How did you not notice that before?
“O Mother, forgive me.” You narrow your eyes and ready yourself for whatever he’s about to throw at you.
He reaches towards his eye that shines a brilliant gold as his long claws near it. In horror, you realize he is about to tear out his eye. Throwing your sword to the ground in an act of desperation, you fling yourself forward and catch his hand. Your weight makes him shift uneasily on his feet and you find yourself staring into the same eye he was about to pluck out.
He glances between your hands around his and your worried expression. He cannot understand why you would stop him. “Let go, Tarnished. I would give thee a fight to ne’er forget.”
You shake your head, clutching onto his hand tighter and trying your best to pull his arm down. “I’m not going to let you tear out your own eye! Are you crazy?”
“Thou hast me at thy mercy. Strike me down or release me.”
“I’ve told you before; I’m not going to kill you.”
His eye narrows and he releases his spear. It thuds onto the ground and the sound reverberates throughout the entire chamber. His other hand wraps around your neck, and he lifts you like you weigh nothing. You do not release his hand as you struggle to breathe.
“Thou’rt foolish and weak. Thy grace is false, thy blade is dull, and it seems thy mind is shattered.” He squeezes harder and you notice black spots in your vision. He peers into your eyes for the Grace you claim to have, and he sees flecks of gold dancing in your irises.
Hesitantly, he loosens his grip enough for you to breathe, but not enough to allow you your freedom. As expected, you heave in heavy gulps of air and cough. He wonders what Mother sees in you, a mere Tarnished, too weak to kill him but not strong enough to delay their inevitable demise at his hand.
“Thank you…” You mutter. You’re still clutching his hand.
“Why didst thou hesitate with thy blade?”
You give a tired and sputtering laugh. “Maybe I’m tired of killing.”
“Nonsense. Reveal the truth.”
“Will you at least put me down?”
He grits his teeth and slowly releases you. He expects you to immediately pick up your weapon and strike back, but you simply reach for one of your flasks.
You notice him watching you with caution. “May I?” You gesture to your flask.
“Fine.”
Unexpectedly, you close the gap between the two of you and unscrew the cork from the bottle. You then hand it over to him without a second thought. 
He doesn’t move, too shocked by your sudden offer. This would heal him, and if he so chooses, he could kill you again with all his strength returned to him.
“I do not require that.” 
You huff and roll your eyes. “Would you please just indulge me? I think you owe me after how many times you killed me, don’t you think?”
Wordlessly, he reaches down and takes your flask. Tipping it back, the liquid warms him as it travels down his throat. He instantly feels better and the wounds you inflicted on him earlier dissipate. When he looks down again, he sees you smiling. He hands the flask back to you and you replace the cork, then store it away in a pouch on your belt.
“There, all better.”
“A duller foe I have never met.”
“And yet, here we are. So, what’s next? Are you going to talk with me, or do you feel like you need to kill me again?” You gesture at his spear still on the ground.
“Why wouldst thou grant me mercy?” His face pinches in confusion.
“Because you don’t deserve to die.” You answer.
“Dost thou consider themselves judge, jury, and executioner?”
“No, but I know enough to understand that you’ve been shunned and cast out by Queen Marika, just like me.”
A Tarnished who speaks ill of his mother? He had yet to wrap his head around that.
“Speak plainly.”
“Okay. I know your mother made you go on an endless crusade in her name against the Hornsent for whatever they did to her. She’s done the same with Godfrey in the Lands Between. The Mountaintops of the Giants, once a land covered in fire, now lay cold with bodies and snow as their only inhabitants. Now, she wants me to fight my way through her remaining children to claim their Great Runes so I can have the burden of becoming Elden Lord.”
“Mother chose-” he begins.
“She cast you out because of your curse.” You interrupt him and his eye blazes out of fury.
“How dare thee!” He bends down to pick up his spear. You hold up your hands and make no move to grab your weapon.
“I understand your pain. I’m cursed to die over and over again until I fulfill her wishes. She doesn’t care for me.” You keep your voice even.
“Thou will never understand my pain nor my curse.”
“Maybe not, but I understand how it feels to be cast out and sequestered without honor or glory.”
Why was he talking to you? He should’ve ended you the moment you gave him your flask. He should’ve killed you 20 times over by now.
But he hesitates.
“Tarnished. Thou hast granted me mercy. Thy reasoning I shall never understand. But thy words ring true and hold merit.” 
“Does that mean you’ll stop killing me?”
“It means I shall consider ceasing hostilities towards you. Thy safety is not yet guaranteed.” 
You groan. These demigods are always so complicated. “Then what do I have to do to get you to trust me?”
“Thou wilt tell me everything.”
You blink at him. “Okay. We could’ve avoided my painful demise many times over if you had just said that earlier.”
The grip on his spear tightens. “I shall make the memory a reality if thou dost not hold thy tongue.”
He’s met with silence. Perhaps you had finally learned when you were to speak. Or maybe you were just thinking of another clever quip that would make him doubt his decision to spare you.
The hilt of his spear hits the ground and he stands taller. His voice echoes around the room. “Thou wilt stay here, within the Keep, so that I may have eyes on thee at all hours of the day. Thou shalt be safe and comfortable in exchange for your knowledge.” 
“You’re going to keep me prisoner?”
“Wouldst thou prefer a grave to a bed?”
“Fair point. We have a deal.”
You hold out your hand and he stares at you in bewilderment. He narrows his eye.
“What?”
You gesture to your hand. “It’s a deal. We’re supposed to shake hands to make it official.”
“I shalt not touch one so depraved.” He looks disgusted at the mention of touching you.
“Shake my hand or get used to killing me. Your choice, my Lord.”
“Thou wouldst jest, even now? When death stands before thee?”
“Can you just shake my hand?”
“...Fine.”
He reaches out and grasps your hand loosely, and you shake his hand. His skin is surprisingly soft. Just as you are about to say something, he pulls away.
“Come. Thy quarters are just down the stairs.”
“Good. I’m exhausted.”
“As am I,” he replies.
You follow him. “But I gave you my flask. You should feel fine.”
“Thou misunderstood. I am exhausted of thy prattling tongue.” 
You scoff, which earns you a small smile from him. You are steeped in an uncomfortable silence as he leads you to your chambers. You walk down a long hallway lined with ornate paintings and trinkets. This is somewhere you had not been while you were fighting your way up to Messmer. You wonder if he knows how many of his men you had dispatched. Considering he granted you some semblance of mercy, you think he has yet to find out.
He stops at a large wooden door. Twisting the knob, the hinges creak like they haven’t been opened in a century. The room is full of dust and stagnant air, but is otherwise beautiful and luxurious.
“I shall have servants clean thy room, of course, but this is where thou shalt stay.”
“It’s pretty. I don’t think I’ve ever stayed somewhere so nice.”
“For once, thy countenance is agreeable.”
“Well, for once, you’re being nice to me.”
His eye twitches in annoyance. “Was I not nice when I spared thee of another woeful death?”
“Seeing as I stopped you from plucking out your own eye, we’ll call it even.”
He felt like he was dealing with a petulant child whenever you opened your mouth to speak. Even threatening you with your demise just spurred you on.
“I shalt leave thee to thy quarters before my headache worsens.”
As he walks away, you call out to him. “Just admit that you haven’t had anyone so entertaining and interesting in your Keep, it’s okay!”
“Yes, my Keep hath never held a jester such as thee.” He replies over his shoulder, not caring if you heard him.
Smiling to yourself, you think that, yes, he does need a jester.
He’s much more handsome when he smiles.
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izar-tarazed · 5 months ago
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"Oh yes, I've killed for this outfit, but can you blame me?"
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nerdallwritey · 5 days ago
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About to Strike (Part 1)
***IMPORTANT, PLEASE READ: ONCE AGAIN I've yapped too much and this chapter became longer than tumblr likes, so I've split it into two posts. It's the same drill as Cheeks All Flushed: The smut is in the other part if you'd rather skip shenanigans and Get To Business. And that's valid! Part 2 is here and also linked down below. Apologies! It IS all in one place on AO3 if you'd prefer that!
Summary: Before Astarion could protest more, you took a sip of the drink.  He gasped. “Darling, what do you think you’re doing?” “Building trust,” you said, smiling at Jaheira. Her features echoed your own and she took a sip as well.  “Ah, what the hells,” Karlach said. “Bottoms up!” She downed her own goblet. “You’re all idiots and I hope you die,” Astarion crossed his arms.  OR The gang finally makes their way into the Shadow Cursed Lands.
Pairing: Astarion x f!reader Rating: 18+ Word count: 21.3k (This particular part is 10.7k) CW: smut, reader is new to sex, piv sex, oral (male receiving), hand job, vaginal fingering, mentions of Astarion's past trauma, blood drinking, mild angst, protective Astarion, soft Astarion, whimpering Astarion, porn with feelings, reader is an idiot (and a bard), so is Astarion (not a bard, just an idiot), lots of party banter, AND JAHEIRA!! Spoilers: Minor spoilers for Act 1 and 2 (in-game dialogue, plot points, etc.), as well as Astarion's plotline Also posted to: AO3 FAIR WARNING: This is PART 6 in my series, "Beauty and the Bard." Find the masterlist here.
a/n: SURPRISE! Part 6 is COMPLETE and she's A LOT. The back half is mainly smut and feelings and Astarion processing emotions a little which we LOVE to see. I hope to the gods that you guys find this to be a good followup to Worth the Peril, but I'm excited to FINALLY be in Act 2 and get into the big romantic scenes that happen there. Thank you all so much for sticking around and loving this goofy version of Astarion and his favorite bard :) You guys are the best and I adore and appreciate every single one of you! Please enjoy these silly little vignettes from the end of Act 1 and the start of Act 2! (Thank you as always to my beta @kermitwazowski for reading!) As a reminder, last time you got Mega Hurt in a fight and Astarion kind of took that personally.
Taglist: Moved to the comment section, since tumblr hates sharing fun with friends - please let me know if you'd like to be added to the list!
“Would you relax?” you whispered sharply to the vampire currently brooding to your right.
“How can I be when this… ancient woman just tried to murder you?” Astarion threw a dramatic hand forward, gesturing to Jaheira, who was walking in front of you towards the Last Light Inn. You all had just arrived at the well lit sanctuary in the Shadow Cursed Lands, only to be interrogated by the High Harper, and vouched for by Mol, who’d managed to find her way here as well.
“I handled it,” you hissed. “It’s going to be okay.”
“While I admire your optimism, darling, I still don’t trust her.”
Karlach buzzed behind you, clearly in disbelief. “Mate, you must be joking. That’s the Jaheira!”
Astarion slowed his pace a bit to meet Karlach’s eye. “And, I take it, you know the old crone?”
“Astarion!” Wyll sounded surprised. “You’ve lived in Baldur’s Gate longer than I have! And you don’t know the tales they tell of Jaheira and her party of adventurers?”
Your crew of seven came to a halt in front of a moss covered fountain to gawk at the elf.
He clicked his tongue. “Mmm… that’d be a no.”
“He’s lying,” Shadowheart rolled her eyes.
“I am not!”
Gale lifted a quizzical eyebrow. “Come now, Astarion, surely you’ve heard passing tales of the heroes of Baldur’s Gate? Or perhaps read a book of their exploits?”
Lae’zel narrowed her eyes. “I do not know of this ‘Jah-hee-rah’ person. Her heroics must not be that impressive if I have never heard of her.”
“Nor I,” Halsin cut in.
“Yes, well, being freakish outsiders from the Astral Plane and the middle of the forest will deprive you of basic history lessons.” Astarion crossed his arms.
You snorted. “So what’s your excuse?” The others snickered. 
Astarion placed an annoyed hand on his hip. “Did you all forget that I was kept as a slave for two hundred years of pure misery and torture?”
The group remained silent for a moment before you stepped forward to kiss his cheek. “You’re still not over that?” 
He smirked. “Would you believe it’s taking me a little longer than one might expect?”
“Shame,” you pouted. Then you looked at Karlach who was angling her head around the fountain to track where Jaheira had gone. “You want to enlighten these three, Karlach?”
Karlach looked back at you all and her eyes lit up with glee. “Oh, yes please!” She rolled her shoulders and bounced on her feet as if she were preparing for battle, rather than recounting basic Baldur’s Gate history. She cleared her throat before she spoke. “Years ago - over a century-”
You turned to Astarion and caught his eye. A century! your expression seemed to say.
Astarion shrugged his shoulders up to his ears and unwrapped one of his crossed arms to hold dramatically in front of himself. So what?
You rolled your eyes. So you should have been there!
He narrowed his eyes and shook his head. I don’t know what to tell you.
You huffed some hair out of your eyes and tuned back in to what Karlach was saying.
“-Jaheira was part of a group that saved Baldur’s Gate from Seravok - a Bhaalspawn trying to plunge the city into war.”
Once again, you caught Astarion’s eye. “And you don’t recall any of this?”
He pursed his lips as the others turned to look at him. “Now that you mention it, I vaguely recall tensions being rather high around the city all those years ago.”
“Liar,” Shadowheart accused again. “It had to be more apparent than that. Why don’t you just admit you know who Jaheira is?”
Astarion’s response was venomous: “I was kept on a very tight leash, thank you, so apologies for not getting the names of the heroes who ‘saved’ the city that kept me enslaved for another hundred years.” 
You approached him quietly and took his hand. He scowled at Shadowheart but wrenched his gaze away to look at you. His expression softened mildly.
“It’s okay,” you said gently. “I’m sure she would have come for you and your siblings had she known.”
“Yes, probably come to kill us for being abominations,” he muttered, but squeezed your hand anyway.
“Ah, don’t be like that, Astarion,” Wyll said cheerfully. “I’m sure she would have helped you! You’re quite fun once you get past all the prickly bits.”
“Gee, thanks,” Astarion said flatly. 
Karlach took the awkward silence that followed as an opportunity to keep fangirling. “My mum used to tell us stories all about them - the legends who protected the city from evil. She said Jaheira was a powerful druid. Adamant. Tough.”
“Probably a good ally to have on our side,” you said. Your companions nodded in agreement.
“I’ve told myself those stories thousands of times since,” Karlach continued. “I never thought I’d meet Jaheira. She’s a hero, and I was always… some Outer City kid.”
“Well, excellent news, Karlach,” Gale said. “Given our circumstances and the path we currently find ourselves on, it’s quite possible that we might be considered heroes one day.”
“Chk,” Lae’zel scoffed. “We don’t even know what we’re up against yet. It is likely some of you will perish before we are able to slay this unknown enemy.”
Shadowheart rolled her eyes. “Charming as always, Lae’zel.”
“I am not charming. I am merely stating fact.”
Halsin cleared his throat. “Another druid you say, Karlach?”
Karlach grinned and nodded. “She’s the best! Can’t believe she wants to talk to us about working together. What a day!”
And what a day it had been. 
Or, tenday, more like.
~~~~~
The day after you’d told Astarion’s sleeping form that you loved him, he’d been nothing but clingy. 
You awoke to find him still curled tightly into your side, but now he was fully awake, his eyes wide and unblinking. It was unnerving.
“Can I help you?” you asked.
He blinked rapidly before an easy grin rested on his lips. “Just making sure you still have a pulse, darling.”
You snorted. “Checking on your food supply, I see.”
Astarion angled his head to nuzzle his nose along your throat before kissing your pulse point. “What can I say,” he murmured against your skin, “we vampires have two instincts, as we learned from that book yesterday: ‘feed and make little vampires.’” He scrunched his face into a silent roar, baring his fangs and forming one of his hands into a claw. He slashed it through the air playfully.
“Yes well, the latter probably won’t be happening for a little while,” you said, shifting to sit up, but wincing in pain over the wound in your torso. 
Astarion was rolling off the pillows within seconds and coming around to help you sit up. His eyes were concerned, but he pouted and his voice was teasingly whiny when he said, “Pity.” He rested his forehead against your temple. “I do so miss being inside of you.”
You nearly choked on your own spit, which had him pulling away from you and laughing. 
“Whatever,” you muttered, watching as Astarion pulled his shirt over his head. 
“Hungry, my sweet?” he asked, still smiling.
“You’re really freaking me out,” you said, giving him a sideways look, “with how nice you’re being.”
Astarion rolled his eyes. “Fine. Starve.” With that, he exited your tent with a theatrical swoosh of the flaps that acted as a door.
You exhaled a disbelieving laugh, watching as the flaps swished back and forth before settling back into their closed position.
“SHE’S WHAT?!” you heard Karlach shriek, followed by loud, bounding footsteps approaching your tent. 
Astarion called after her in annoyance, “Don’t bother her!”
“Soldier!” Karlach’s head and shoulders popped their way into your tent. “So happy you’re awake!”
“Hi Karlach,” you laughed. “I’d get up but-”
Karlach shook her head. “Don’t move a muscle. I’m sure Shadowheart and Halsin will want to change your bandages and pump you full of potions but… I’m so glad you’re okay.”
“Me too,” you said. “Thank you for helping while I was unconscious.”
“You’d do the same for any of us,” she said earnestly, still on her hands and knees in the entrance of your tent. 
You heard a dull thump outside that had Karlach yelping in surprise. 
“Out,” came Astarion’s sour tone, his tongue putting extra emphasis on the “t.”
Karlach looked back over her shoulder and then over to you. “He kicked my boot, the bastard! Proper hard, too!”
“I’d do a lot worse if you weren’t a walking furnace.” Another thump informed you that he kicked Karlach’s boot again.
Rather than retreat, however, Karlach settled her elbows into the dirt and rested her head in her hands. “Ask nicely.” She met your eye with a mischievous grin. 
You heard Astarion squawk incredulously. “Darling, tell her to move!”
Clearing your throat to keep from laughing, you said firmly, “Astarion. Be nice. That’s my dear friend, Karlach, you’re kicking.”
He muttered something you couldn’t make out, followed by a loud groan. 
Through gritted teeth, he said, “Dear, sweet, Karlach-” 
“Liking the sound of this,” Karlach nodded.
“-would you be so kind as to remove your humongous form from the entrance of my lovely bard’s tent?” It sounded as if the words were causing him physical pain.
Karlach looked back at you. “What do you think, Soldier?”
“He could probably do better,” you said with a smirk. But it was then that your stomach decided to growl loudly. 
“Woof,” Karlach said.
You could practically hear Astarion’s eye roll. “You know, if you let me in, I could remedy that little problem you’re experiencing.”
Karlach slanted her mouth to the side. “He’s probably right, Gale left behind a bunch of-” she waggled her fingers, “-magic-y warm food for you before he, Shadowheart, Lae’zel, and Wyll headed out this morning.”
You cocked your head to the side. “And you didn’t go with them?”
“Are you kidding?” she asked. “And miss you possibly waking up?”
You smiled at her fondly. “That’s very sweet of you.”
“Besides, I don’t trust myself around all the explodey mushrooms down here.”
Astarion cleared his throat loudly.
“Alright, Fangs, don’t get your panties in a twist.” Karlach looked over her shoulder at him before looking back at you once more. “Let me know if you need anything. You know where to find me.” She pointed to her temple, referring to the tadpole connection, and winked. She crawled backwards on her hands and knees, purposely taking her time, before she fully exited the tent. 
Astarion took her place instantly, crawling into the space with a plate of steaming scrambled eggs, fresh fruit, bread, and a pair of healing potions. He placed the entire thing on your lap, along with a fork, before settling onto the ground next to you. 
You blinked at him. “Breakfast in bed?” 
He scoffed. “It isn’t as if you can join us at the breakfast table.”
Smiling softly, you reached out a hand to cup his cheek. “Thank you, my love. This is very kind of you.”
He still scowled, but his face softened when he took your hand from his cheek and kissed your palm. “I expect the same kind of pampering in return if I’m ever to practically die as foolishly as you.”
You laughed before picking up the fork and stabbing some egg. “I’ll keep that in mind.” 
~~~~~
And for the first few days, it did feel like pampering: Astarion staying by your side at all times - reading to you, laying with you, changing your bandages… He only ever left to feed himself. He refused your blood, citing that you needed it more than him, even though your bleeding had slowed to a halt by the third day. 
It all felt very nice.
Until you felt well enough to get back on your feet.
The others had dutifully been wrapping things up in the Underdark; defeating monsters, freeing deep gnomes from their drow and duergar slavers, rescuing the halfling woman’s husband, and exploring an abandoned wizard’s tower and the temple to Shar, to name a few. Lae’zel had even gifted you a new longsword she’d found, Phalar Aluve - a sword with the ability to sing or shriek - claiming that this weapon would not have allowed you to be wounded as fatally, had you had it during the duergar battle in the decrepit village.
On the day they raided the Zhentarim cache Astarion had mentioned all those days ago, he’d remained dutifully by your side, much to your dismay and protests that you’d be fine without him for a few hours.
“Absolutely not,” he’d said, looking down his nose at you. “As if Halsin or Shadowheart could care for you as properly as I have.”
“You forget,” you’d responded, mildly annoyed, “that they’re the ones who taught you how to care for me.”
“And I’m the one who shall continue to care for you,” he huffed, finishing changing your bandages once again. By this time, you could sit up on your own with mild to no pain at all. You were perfectly capable of changing your own bandages, but Astarion had insisted on continuing to help you. 
You supposed it was nice that he wanted to take care of you, given how much he usually hated being responsible for anything, but he was taking the job a bit too seriously.
Luckily, Karlach and Lae’zel had lugged some chests they’d been unable to open at the Zhentarim storeroom back to camp, allowing your beloved rogue to take part in the raid, despite not attending himself, and thus allowing you a moment of peace to roll off your pillows and put on fresh clothes without his help.
You emerged from your tent to look at the spoils from the storeroom, standing up straight and walking on your own. Astarion hadn’t noticed at first, too busy fiddling with the lock of a particularly large chest, but the commotion created by your companions forced him to look in your direction. 
“You’re up!” Wyll exclaimed.
“Do you need any help?” Gale snapped the book he was reading closed.
“Give her some space,” Shadowheart said, assessing you with her eyes from a few feet away.
Astarion got up and hurried over to you. “What do you think you’re doing?”
You smiled at him reassuringly. “I promise I feel well enough to be out here. I just wanted some fresh, Underdark air.” You looked over his shoulder at one of the open chests. “Find anything good?”
He narrowed his eyes. “Nothing worth you getting out of bed for.” He looked you up and down and noticed your change of clothes. He sighed. “I could have helped-”
“I’m fine,” you maintained, placing your hands on his shoulders and looking him directly in the eyes.
Halsin approached the two of you and nodded approvingly. “It is good for her to be up and moving around. It’ll stretch the healing muscles and allow her to join the fray again much more quickly than if she stays in bed all day.” 
Astarion rolled his eyes. “Oh, what do you know?”
“Astarion,” Shadowheart said in warning. “If she says she’s okay, let’s believe her. I’m sure she’ll tell you if something’s wrong this time around, right?” She made pointed eye contact with you. 
You held up your hand as if swearing an oath. “I promise.”
He watched you closely, narrowing his eyes and sniffing pompously. “Fine.” 
He made no move to leave your side.
You rolled your eyes and walked over to the chest he’d been working on, the thieves’ tools still stuck inside the lock. You patted the top of the chest and said, “Don’t let me interrupt you.”
Astarion watched you carefully before he made his way back to the chest and sunk to his knees. 
Not far off, Lae’zel was polishing her greatsword. “Does this mean you are well enough to accompany us to the crèche?”
“Well, I-”
“No,” said every other person at camp at once.
“Chk,” Lae’zel thrust her greatsword into the dirt in front of her. “Heal faster.”
“Trying my best,” you said with a shrug. 
Lae’zel rolled her eyes and returned to assessing her greatsword.
“If you’re going to be up and about,” Shadowheart said, “you should probably start packing up your belongings for when we need to enter the Mountain Pass.”
“Augh!” you exclaimed loudly, clutching your side. Astarion was up immediately and you leaned your weight on him, throwing your arms around his neck for support. “So sorry, Shadowheart,” you said in a fake strained tone, “my wound… it prevents me… from hard labor…” You flopped fully into Astarion’s side, closing your eyes and sticking out your tongue as if you’d just perished on the spot.
“Oh good,” Astarion said blandly, “she’s finally dead and I can get on with my life.”
You kicked him.
“Uh huh,” Shadowheart crossed her arms. “Such a shame she’ll never be able to annoy us again.”
“I’ll haunt you forever…” you murmured, wobbling your voice like a ghost.
 Shadowheart stepped forward and patted your arm. “I’ll ask for blessings from Lady Shar on behalf of your passing.”
“Thank you…” you murmured again.
Astarion bumped his hip into yours forcefully. “Would you get off of me?”
You pulled back and smiled at him. “See? I’m fine.”
He humphed and returned to unlocking the big chest, only to find it full of more thieves' tools. He sighed heavily and rested his forehead on the edge of the chest. You peered inside and laughed.
“Aw,” you said sympathetically and patted his shoulder. “I’m going to get some food.”
“Let me-” 
“No,” you said firmly. “Keep going through your useless chests, my love. I’ll be right over here.” You walked over to the makeshift kitchen area Gale had set up. 
Astarion watched you go, and you felt his protective eyes remain on you for the remainder of the night. 
~~~~~
It was like that now: Astarion trying to do things for you while you insisted you could do them on your own. 
It had bewildered you when he actually helped you pack for your trip back to the surface. He had little to pack of his own, given that he’d more or less lived in your tent throughout your stay in the Underdark. He was relentlessly cautious with you, insisting that Gale cast Fly on you so that you didn’t have to ascend the impossibly long ladder back up into the Goblin camp. And he rarely let you out of his sight, even when safely surrounded by your other companions. 
The Mountain Pass was beautiful: bathed in what seemed like permanently golden light that had Astarion blooming in the sun’s glow once again. When your group accidentally stumbled into a hostile party of undead while looking for a place to camp, Astarion had taken your hand and pulled you behind him to shield you with his body. 
“I can help!” you’d pleaded, watching your friends sling spells and swords at the skeletons.
“Let us handle this,” Astarion had growled, slashing his daggers through a ghoul that came a little too close to you for comfort. He kept you both to the outskirts of the fight.
Try as you might to help, Astarion held you back, glaring at you for drawing the attention of a ghast when you cast Thunder Wave in its direction. You gave him an apologetic smile before he fatally stabbed the ghast in the chest. 
Bloodied and burnt out, you and your companions finally found a decent place to camp, close to the monastery that Lae’zel was sure housed the crèche. She took the lead on making a plan to enter the building and find the cure that had been promised to her all her life. You sat by the fire, listening idly to her plans, knowing full well that no one - except maybe Lae’zel herself - wanted you fighting so soon after your injury. You also knew that, should the cure be legitimate, your friends would happily accompany you back into the crèche where you could have the tadpole removed. You chose not to linger on the thought of your adventure possibly coming to an end so soon.
Unsurprisingly, Astarion sat by your side, mending a pair of pants. His knee was pressed lightly into your upper thigh as he hunched over the fabric to see his thread better. 
“You could be doing that in my tent, you know,” you said quietly, watching his fingers nimbly weave the fabric back together with needle and thread. “It’s probably easier to see what you’re doing surrounded by candles from all sides than just this fire. I don’t want you to burn yourself.”
“I’m quite skilled at seeing in darkness, thank you,” he said, not looking over at you.
You exhaled softly and leaned your head on his shoulder, effectively stretching your right side, which housed your wound. He paused momentarily, then kept going. 
“I’m okay,” you said softly, barely audible above the roaring fire and the heated discussion of possible battle strategy amongst your companions a few feet away. “I’m not going to get hurt like that again.”
Astarion sighed and halted his work on the pants. “You can’t promise that,” he said, sounding annoyed. He spoke his next words quickly, equal parts irritated and vulnerable: “You have no idea what’s coming and neither do I or any of us and I know you’re capable of protecting yourself but the least I can do right now is make sure you heal properly and don’t get hurt again because if I lost you… I wouldn’t know what to do.” He cleared his throat and looked back down at the fabric in his lap. “Or… whatever.” 
You smiled softly and lifted your head from his shoulder to kiss his cheek. “I adore you.”
He exhaled an amused breath through his nose. “You’re fine, too.” 
“Thank you for looking out for me.”
He sighed dramatically. “It’s been dreadful.”
You laughed. “I can’t even begin to imagine the sacrifices you’ve made.”
He brought his hands up to count on his fingers. “I’ve barely slept, I’ve been drinking animal plonk as opposed to your delicious vintage, I’ve hardly killed anything in the last few days, and I haven’t been able to sleep with you for just as long, if not longer.”
You were glad he wasn’t looking right at you, otherwise he’d surely see the flush on your cheeks. “You’ve been sleeping with me nearly every night.”
He nudged your unwounded side with his elbow. “You know what I mean.”
You smirked. “I miss you too,” you said. “And I’m sorry. You don’t need to be giving up all of that for me.”
He leaned his head on top of yours which had found its way back to his shoulder. “Just… heal, would you? You wretched thing.”
You reached your hand to rest on top of his knee. “You must be starving.”
“In more ways than one,” he growled teasingly in your ear. 
“I’m serious.”
“As am I. But your blood stays off limits until I’m sure you’re done bleeding.”
You made a frustrated noise. “I haven’t bled in days, you stubborn leech. And you nearly killed me the first time you drank from me, so really, what’s the difference?”
“Yes, but we weren’t us back then. You were just some bard that I crash landed on a horrid beach with.” 
“Hmm,” you hummed through pursed lips.
Now Astarion bent to kiss your cheek. “I’m just being extra careful, my sweet.” He moved his mouth to your ear. “And… it’ll be all the more exquisite when I finally taste you again.”
“Ah,” you said. “So you’re edging yourself.”
Astarion sputtered, “That’s not-” Then he smirked. “And what would you know about edging?”
You swallowed thickly. “Enough.”
He chuckled darkly. “Noted.”
It was quieter now, as your companions had dispersed to their own tents to prepare for tomorrow’s journey to the crèche. 
Still, Astarion kept his voice down. “I have an important question for you though, my darling.”
“And what would that be?”
“Whose belongings should we peruse first tomorrow while everyone’s gone?”
~~~~~
The only interesting items you’d found while snooping around camp the next day were cheap erotic novels hidden among both Shadowheart’s and Wyll’s possessions. 
Everyone, minus Halsin, who was sticking around the edge of camp planning a way through the Shadow Cursed Lands, had made their way to the crèche only a few hours before. 
“‘The Salty Mermaid,’” you’d said, waggling your eyebrows at Astarion who was rifling through Wyll’s tent. 
“You’ll never believe this, darling.” He turned to show you the same book, its illustrated cover even more worn than the copy you’d found in one of Shadowheart’s bags. 
“Shut up,” you said, leaning forward to snatch the book from his hand and holding the copies side by side. Both depicted a shirtless man gazing into the eyes of a beautiful, topless mermaid, her torso turned tastefully away from view. Their mouths were parted slightly in anticipation of a steaming kiss, ocean mist spraying over them and the rock they were perched on in the middle of the ocean. Wyll’s copy looked as though it had been read dozens of times over the span of many years, while Shadowheart’s was newer and gave the impression that it had been opened frequently, given the way the cover refused to rest against the first page.
“This is outrageous,” Astarion said, sitting behind you and resting his chin on your shoulder to look at both books. 
You turned your head to look at him. “Didn’t take those two for naughty book lovers?”
“What? Oh, no, everyone in this camp is a deeply sad, depraved creature, that’s not it.”
You snorted. “Okay, so what-”
“It’s that they didn’t think to include us in their little book club!” His hand gestured wildly between the covers. “You and I read all the time!”
“We don’t know they’re reading them together,” you pointed out. “Maybe it’s a coincidence.”
Astarion looked at you skeptically. “Do you really believe that?”
You thought for a moment. Honestly, you weren’t sure. Your nights had been occupied spending time with the man currently wrapped delicately around your midsection. You couldn’t be sure that your companions hadn’t started a book club without you. It brought a small smile to your face, imagining your friends bonding with each other without your help.
Astarion didn’t wait for you to answer. “Let’s at least see what all the fuss is about.” He leaned forward slightly, careful not to jostle your right side and took Wyll’s book from your hand. He flipped open to a random page as you set Shadowheart’s book on your lap. You leaned your head against his, which was still resting on your shoulder, and read along with him. He tilted his head slightly to read slowly and seductively in your ear. 
“Fabian ran his calloused fingers along Allura’s scales. Her tail quivered in response.” He held out the “s,” as if hissing, and nipped at your ear.
You flinched in surprise and smacked him gently on the side of the head. 
He chuckled and continued. “‘Taste me,’ Allura pleaded. Fabian smashed his lips against hers and their tongues twisted together like two eels in the Sword Sea.”
You barely withheld a laugh. “Trying to seduce me with eels again, I see.” 
Astarion narrowed his eyes, rereading the passage in disbelief. “Oh, gods dammit.”
You nuzzled the side of his head with your own. “It’s working better this time,” you admitted.
“Oh?” Astarion pulled back and met you with a wicked grin. 
You nodded and watched his mouth as he leaned in to kiss you before pulling back just out of his reach. He opened his eyes and gave you a puzzled expression. 
“I didn’t say it worked completely.” You pushed his nose lightly to turn his face away from yours and back to the book in his hands. 
“Why you-” He dropped the book unceremoniously and brought both his hands to your cheeks to kiss you firmly. You laughed against his mouth before giving in and opening up for him.
“Astarion,” came Halsin’s voice from a few yards away. 
Astarion immediately disconnected the kiss and shot a deadly glare at the bear. 
Halsin hadn’t been looking. Instead he’d been focusing down at what he was holding - a half carved piece of wood, something that was beginning to look like a rabbit. When he finally looked up, he halted in his tracks. 
“My apologies,” he said, holding his hands up in a showing of peace, “I merely wanted to ask Astarion for a better knife. It appears my proper carving tools are lost somewhere within our wares.”
“Hi Halsin,” you said nonchalantly. 
Halsin chuckled. “I didn’t mean to disturb your fun.”
“Fun? What fun? We never have fun.” You nudged Astarion who was still staring daggers at Halsin. 
Astarion sighed and settled his chin back on your shoulder. “Relax, darling, I’m sure Halsin knows all about the kind of fun we have together.” 
Halsin nodded. “Far be it from me to interrupt a spry couple preparing to partake in one of nature’s greatest gifts.”
“Ugh,” Astarion groaned in disgust and you felt your cheeks go red. “You make it sound awful.”
“It’s only natural-”
“Did you check our Traveler’s Chest for your carving tools?” you desperately tried to change the subject. “It’s possible one of us packed them in there by mistake.”
Halsin snapped his fingers. “Of course! And the Traveler’s Chest would be…”
You pointed in the direction of the chest, which was thankfully on the other side of camp. 
Halsin followed your gaze and nodded again. “I shall investigate the chest. Sorry once again.” He started to leave the two of you but turned back around.  “Remember to be careful of your wound.” He gestured to your right side and you absently held your hand to the tender area. “Nothing worse than an injury worsened in the throes of passion.”
“Goodbye, Halsin,” Astarion waved him off. 
Halsin chuckled once more, then left the area. You and Astarion remained silent for a moment, watching him go. 
You looked over at him. “Moment over?”
“So incredibly over,” Astarion lifted his chin from your shoulder and crawled around to sit next to you. “But the druid’s right. You’re still hurt.”
You huffed some hair out of your face. “And you’re still a drama queen.”
Astarion gasped and held a hand to his chest dramatically. “How dare you.”
“I’m fine!” you insisted. “Watch this!” 
You stood and leaned your body to the left, stretching your right side and lifting your right arm over your head.
“See?”
Astarion cocked his head to the side. “Impressive. Now stretch the other way.”
You remained upright and ramrod straight. “I don’t want to.”
“Because…?”
“Because…” You rolled your eyes. “Oh, fuck you! You know why.”
“Because you’re still sore-”
“Yes, because I’m still sore.” You sat beside him again and muttered, “killjoy.”
Astarion stood and reached for your hands, holding them in both of his own. “Call me whatever names you like, it won’t change my mind.” He leaned forward and kissed you softly. 
You frowned at him. “Asshole.”
Kiss. “Darling.” 
“Bat brain.”
Kiss. “Beautiful.” 
“Priss.”
Kiss. “My- hey.” He pulled himself back to look down his nose at you. “I’m not a priss,  I’m simply surrounded by frumps. And Shadowheart.”
You scoffed and reached up to brush your hand through his curls, mussing them ever so slightly. 
“Hey!” he exclaimed, pushing you away and reaching up to fix his hair. 
You crossed your arms and raised an eyebrow at him. 
He glared back and rolled his eyes. “Did I not just call you ‘beautiful?’”
“One of your frequent pet names,” you waved him off playfully and went to pick up Shadowheart and Wyll’s discarded books. “It means next to nothing.”
Astarion turned to watch you. “That’s not true.”
You laughed. “You call everyone ‘darling.’” 
“That’s different.” 
“How so?”
If he were still alive, you’d be able to feel his body heat as he stepped closer to you. He looked up towards the sky and moved his hands around as if searching for the correct words. 
“‘Darling’ has always been a lovely blanket term of endearment for victims whose names I didn’t bother to learn but needed to entice.”
You stiffened, thrown off by his honest answer. “Oh.” He met your eye. “People like feeling seen, and ‘darling’ does the job quite nicely. Call it a habit now, I suppose.”
You smirked at him. “You know my name, right?”
He smiled sideways in return. “Who are you again?”
“Good answer.”
“Honestly though, darling,” he said, before shaking his head and saying your name instead. “‘Darling’ isn’t anything special to me, that’s true,” he placed his hands firmly on your upper arms, just below your shoulders, “but you are.”
You exhaled a shaky breath, trying but failing not to shrink under his intense gaze. “Another good answer.” 
Astarion rolled his eyes and clicked his tongue. “Look at me, please.” 
You met his eye again and saw his features soften. 
“I’ve never called someone ‘beautiful’ and not meant it.”
You raised a disbelieving eyebrow. “Really. In all the times you had to seduce people, you never called someone you weren’t attracted to ‘beautiful’ just to make things go faster?”
Astarion rubbed absent minded circles into your arms with his thumbs. “In those instances, I preferred referring to them as, ‘striking.’”
You snorted. “You can’t be serious.”
“I could say ‘dead serious,’ but that would be atrocious, so I won’t.”
“‘Striking,’” you repeated, laughing a little at the vagueness of it. “I guess that could mean anything.”
Astarion nodded. “Exactly.” He shifted his hands up to your shoulders. “But you, my sweet, are exquisite.” 
You smiled shyly. “I could say ‘aw shucks,’ but then you’d kill me, so I won’t.”
He pushed himself away from you again. “You are infuriating.”
Dropping the books once more, you reached for his wrist as he backed away. “No, no, I’m sorry,” you said as you brought his hand to your mouth to kiss his knuckles. “Tell me more about how beautiful I am.”
He rolled his eyes and sighed dramatically before his features settled into a seductive grin. He reached forward and pulled you closer by the waist. His voice was low and flirtatious when he said, “I told you on that first night I had my way with you that you were the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen.” He shifted his head to nip at your ear, “I meant that.”
A shiver went through your body and you closed your eyes. “Really?”
Astarion scoffed. “I wouldn’t willingly attach myself to just anyone, darling.” He kissed your neck. “For one thing, there’s this gorgeous neck of yours.”
You let out an amused sigh. “Go on…”
“Your eyes,” he said, shifting up to bear his crimson gaze into yours, “they sparkle like anything. I can’t say I’ve ever seen eyes more lovely.” You blinked at him, unsure of what to say. He continued, “Especially when you’re laughing. Preferably at something clever I’ve said.”
That made you laugh. “You’re not always as clever as you think.”
He smiled back at you. “So long as I keep seeing that dazzling smile, I shall make a fool of myself.” After a beat, he clarified, “But only for you.”
If you weren’t careful, you might cry. “You sweet, stupid man.”
“Speaking of that smile; that mouth of yours. I could eat you right up.” 
He bent to kiss you deeply but you pulled away to giggle. “And you have!”
“And I have,” he agreed, succeeding in kissing you this time. 
Your mouth moved against his slowly, keeping in time with him, and you brought your arms up to wrap around his neck. As the kiss became more intense, his tongue licking into your mouth, your heart picked up speed, which sent Astarion groaning against your lips.
“That delicious heartbeat,” he said dreamily, breaking the kiss. “It’s as sweet as any song you’ve ever played, my love.”
Your eyes shot open as he brought his face down to your throat again to kiss your pulse point. Based on his body language and the sensual way he continually kissed your neck, you had a feeling he didn’t realize what he’d said. He kept talking.
“Your heartbeat means you're alive,” he placed a kiss on your collarbone. “And that you’re here,” a kiss to your chest. “With me,” a kiss atop your clothed left breast, above your pounding heart. “Not to mention it’s the source of my favorite meal,” he pulled back to look at you with a goofy grin that he quickly morphed into one of seduction. When he saw your bewildered expression, his face fell into one of concern. “What is it?”
You shook your head and blinked rapidly, attempting to keep your composure. “Astarion,” you said, your voice full of adoration, “there’s something I need to tell you.”
“What’s wrong?” His tone was instantly serious and stern. “Did something happen?” He inspected your right side as if you may have started bleeding again. 
Laughter bubbled out of your chest at his sudden shift in demeanor. This man cared for you so deeply it almost hurt. And it was so blatantly obvious to everyone but himself.
“There’s nothing wrong, dummy,” you said, tapping the tip of his nose to bring his attention back to you. 
He looked at you questioningly and saw nothing but affection in your eyes. “Then…” he leaned in closer, drawn in by the softness of your features, “what is it?”
You leaned in as well, watching his mouth and subconsciously wetting your lips in preparation for what you were about to say. “I…” you eyes began to close, “lo-”
“Tsk'va!”
You and Astarion froze, your mouths inches apart. 
“That wasn’t you, was it?” he muttered. 
You narrowed your eyes at him, swatting his cheek lightly and pulling away.
Lae’zel was standing not too far off, covered in blood, staring at the two of you with an intense ire that had you both nearly jumping away from each other. “You feeble wretches are delighting in intercourse whilst the Lich Queen lies to her kin about purification and I nearly lose my life as a result.”
Astarion straightened and looked at his nails, bored. “Oh, is that all?”
You gave him a look before stepping forward to offer comfort. “What happened?”
Lae’zel looked between you and Astarion before furrowing her brows and marching off to her tent. “She may yet purify me!” she called angrily, sounding like she was trying to convince herself more than anyone.
The rest of your party stumbled into camp not far behind. They, too, were drenched in blood and looking worse for wear. You approached them immediately, Astarion reluctantly on your heels. 
“Is everyone okay?” you quickly looked over everyone and didn’t note any major injuries.
“We’re alright,” Wyll assured and nodded to Shadowheart, “no thanks to Shadowheart.”
“Don’t thank me yet,” she groaned. “Let’s see if we survive the night.” She gestured towards Lae’zel who was angrily shedding her armor and shrieking frustratedly with each discarded piece.
You looked back at the others and repeated, “What happened?”
“Our little dream visitor had some rather enlightening news for our githyanki friend,” Gale sighed, wiping his brow. 
“Well hang on now,” Karlach said. “Her people, or rather, some random doctor lady, tried to kill her first!”
Wyll nodded solemnly. “Not to mention that fearsome god of hers threatened our lives.”
You inhaled sharply. Even Astarion looked surprised. “What?”
“Why do the gods favor you people?” Astarion crossed his arms. “They never answered me when I called.”
“Now, now, Astarion,” Gale said, “this was not a meeting on the most benevolent of terms.”
Astarion rolled his eyes. “So were you able to kill her or something? Is that why you’re all drenched in what smells like an absurd amount of gith blood?”
“Kill a god?” Wyll laughed lightly. “Be serious, Astarion.”
The vampire shrugged. “I don’t know what you lot are capable of, we just met.”
“‘Just met?!’” Shadowheart scoffed incredulously. “And you think you could have taken on a god? You and what? Those sharp teeth of yours?”
“If you’d like to see what they’re capable of, darling, you need only ask.” He flashed her a malicious grin. 
“Astarion,” you caught his eye and shook your head slightly. 
“If killing that overgrown creep were an option, I gladly would have taken it,” Karlach punched at her open palm. “I can’t stand bullies.”
Halsin now entered the fray. “Peace,” he said calmly. “Everyone should get cleaned up and inspected for injuries, then we can discuss the events of the créche.”
You turned to look for Lae’zel, but her tent was empty. You assumed she’d gotten a jumpstart on the cleaning process. 
“Why is my book in the dirt?!” Shadowheart exclaimed. “Astarion!”
“I think it’s time I go for a hunt,” Astarion kissed you swiftly. “You can handle this, can’t you darling?” Then he took off at a brisk pace down the side of the mountain. 
~~~~~
After Lae’zel and the others had cleaned themselves up and bandaged their shallow wounds, you’d all sat around the fire to discuss what had occurred at the crèche and what the dream visitor had told Lae’zel of Vlaakith’s deception towards the purification process.
That night, Kith’rak Voss and his group of rebel githyanki warriors had visited you and your companions, telling you all that the Astral Prism held the key to Vlaakith’s undoing. He’d also promised to explain more and provide help once you reached Baldur’s Gate. 
“Why must they always be so cryptic,” Astarion had muttered to you from where you stood behind Lae’zel, allowing her to take the lead on this. “If the Prism is a source of unnamed power, then I think we have a right to know about it.” He pouted and you elbowed him lightly. 
As you were preparing to leave for the Shadow Cursed Lands the next day, Elminster appeared, bearing a message for Gale from Mystra. 
“Don’t be ridiculous,” you’d steamed after the old wizard left, “you’re not blowing yourself up, Gale. I won’t let you.”
“She’s right,” Astarion agreed. You turned and gave him a surprised look. He shrugged. “Sacrificing Gale to the Absolute is a waste of a perfectly good cult we could be controlling.” When you rolled your eyes, he amended, “And a waste of a perfectly good Gale, I suppose.”
“I am touched, Astarion,” Gale said before turning his attention back on you. “Let’s save such certainty about my fate for the moment such a decision is upon us. You may feel differently, once we know what we’re truly up against.” 
Thus your party kept packing up in preparation to leave for the Shadow Cursed Lands, which Halsin had discovered an entrance to, not far from your camp. 
Upon entering, the suffocating nature of the dark hit you instantly, and you felt a shift in your party the more you shuffled into the area. 
Astarion held out an arm to stop you from going any further, away from the lit fire you’d found near the entrance. “Can you feel that?” 
“You mean the impending sense of doom?” Karlach asked. “Yeah, I feel it.”
Astarion ignored her. “The dark, it’s… hungry. Best watch the shadows.”
Lae’zel scoffed. “How can darkness feel anything, let alone require sustenance?”
“That’s not-” Astarion sighed. “Oh, nevermind. Just… stay close to the light.”
“Don’t have to tell me twice,” Wyll said, grabbing a torch from the lit fire near the entrance. 
Shadowheart gazed into the distance, straining her eyes to see into the dark. “This place… there’s power in these shadows, I can sense it.”
Astarion snorted. “Shadowheart feeling one with the shadows. A little on the nose there, darling.”
Shadowheart shot him a deathly glare that had him look over at you for protection. You patted his shoulder in response.
“She’s right, though,” Gale agreed. “I’ve never seen such a concentration of shadow magic. We must forge on, but carefully. It will corrupt any who lack the power to control it.”
“Best get a move on, then,” Halsin siad, grabbing a torch in one hand and your party’s ox cart with the other. 
Wyll took the lead with his torch, while the rest of you grabbed your own. You and Astarion brought up the rear as you all made your way through the darkness. He was uncharacteristically quiet as you went. 
“Everything okay?” you asked him quietly, making sure the others wouldn’t be able to hear you. 
Astarion’s eyes were darting around, on high alert, but he looked over at you when you reached for his free hand with your own. “It feels like we’re being watched,” he said, returning his eyes to scanning your surroundings. “Hunted, even. But there’s nothing out there,” he looked in your direction but was focusing on the darkness behind you, “only more darkness.”
You nodded, and joined him in scanning the surrounding area. 
“I much prefer it when I’m the one prowling in the shadows, about to strike.”
“Ooh,” you said, shaking your voice as if telling a scary story, “scaaaary.”
Astarion looked at you with a scowl that you could see was concealing a laugh. “Sorry, did you want something?” He stepped closer to you, bringing his face inches away from yours. “Or just looking for a distraction?” He looked down at your lips. 
“I-” you looked at his lips as well and watched as his mouth formed into a grin. 
“Look alive, lovebirds,” Karlach turned back to face you two. “Movement up ahead.”
Instinctively, Astarion pulled you to him, shielding your right side with his body from possible attacks.
It was then that your party came across a group of Absolute worshippers, seeking passage across the Shadow Cursed Lands to Moonrise Towers with the help of a drider named Kar’niss, who brandished a magical lantern of some kind. You all played along, brandishing your True Soul statuses in order to gain favor and join the cultists on their journey deeper into the shadows. You even offered to play the Spider's Lyre, which Wyll had found and given to you in the Underdark, in order to summon the drider. 
Astarion made it a point of keeping you close, despite the cultists giving you no trouble.
“I’m fine,” you murmured, bumping his hip with your own.
He scoffed. “Oh, so you trust the arachnid is totally sane and won’t turn on us at any given moment?”
“Well-” He made a good point. While Kar’niss had done nothing to prove he was an imminent danger to you, his words were erratic and he’d snapped at you earlier for offering to carry his lantern.
“Wait…” Kar’niss hissed suddenly, holding his lantern aloft in front of what appeared to be a long abandoned house. “Something’s wrong, Majesty.”
“He’s right,” Astarion said quietly, drawing his daggers, “I can sense blood pumping in that building.”
“Should we do something?” Wyll asked.
“Shhh,” Shadowheart hushed. “We don’t know where they are, exactly. Do you want them to spring out at us while they still have the element of surprise?”
“Not particularly,” said Wyll, just as Lae’zel said “Yes,” and drew her greatsword from her back.
“Who’s there?” Kar’niss called. “Show yourself!”
From within the house came a male voice, shouting, “Harpers, attack!” 
“Harpers?” Karlach repeated.
The man continued yelling orders. “Kill the cultists… and get that lantern!”
“HERETICS!” Kar’niss shrieked. “VILLAINS IN THE DARK!”
“Soldier,” Karlach turned to you, a frantic look in her eyes, “Those are Harpers!”
Your own eyes widened. Harpers were known for protecting the innocent from evils across the realms. It made sense why they would want to attack cultists of the Absolute. 
“Wait!” you shouted and ran forward as Astarion called your name, trying to stop you. “We can help!” You spoke to the man leading this gang of Harpers.
The man looked you up and down as Astarion approached you with his knives still drawn, ready to pounce. “Hurt her, and you die,” he growled, dropping into a low stance.
You exhaled. “Sorry about the guard dog.”
“Careful,” Astarion said lowly, “I bite.” He gnashed his teeth at the group of Harpers surveying you closely. 
A woman with long curly hair stepped forward. “Prove we can trust you.”
You nodded and took your lute off your back,strumming a quick tune that had the deep purple magic of Shatter sparking at your fingertips. You turned back towards the cultists, who were now sandwiched between the Harpers and your party. You friends took the hint and drew their own weapons. 
“What are they doing?” Kar’niss eclaimed. “We thought they were True Souls! Traitors! Heathens!”
“Darling, are you sure about this?” Astarion asked, watching you carefully, checking for any signs that you weren’t ready to fight. 
You looked over at him and winked, casting a powerful Shatter that sent the cultists flying in every direction. 
The battle that followed was thankfully not as bad as it could have been, thanks to the help from the Harpers. Astarion had remained by your side the whole time, maneuvering the two of you out of the way whenever an attack landed closeby. He dutifully shielded your right side, stabbing the hobgoblin rather brutally when he lunged at you. 
When the battle ended and it was clear that no one had been injured too severely, you approached Kar’niss’ lantern and picked it up. Its chilly glow appeared to protect you all far better from the Shadow Curse than your long since discarded torches. 
The male Harper who you’d pleaded to at the start of the battle now approached you. “Incredible magic,” he said, indicating the lantern. “I can feel the light lifting the shadows - even those within me.”
Astarion laughed quietly at his remark, and you kicked the vampire in the shin. 
“Find us at the Last Light Inn,” the Harper said, pulling out a map and pointing to a small building by the river. 
“Thank you,” you said, marking the location on your own map.
“Be safe,” he said with a nod. “And be brave. We expect no less. Thank you for your help.” With that, he and his other Harpers made their way deeper into the shadows, accompanied by their own torches. 
“Could we not have gone with them?” Karlach asked.
“Probably had other Harperly duties to take care of,” Gale reasoned. 
“We should probably start heading that way anyway,” you said. “My magic’s depleted and I could use some sleep.”
“Agreed,” Halsin said, stretching his arms above his head and grabbing the ox cart once again. “It will be a relief to rest these weary bones upon a mattress for once.”
“Hmm,” Shadowheart mused, “is grass not cutting it for you anymore?”
“Far from it,” Halsin said. “But even I can appreciate the pleasures of a warm bed every once in a while.”
~~~~~
“Unfortunately, there is only one room available,” Jaheira said flatly when you all entered the inn and approached her at her desk.
Astarion scoffed. “Didn’t you just say outside that there were beds, plural, if we needed rest?” 
“It would seem I lied,” she said, looking through a book that you assumed showed current room assignments. “Oops.” She didn’t sound remorseful. “Looks like you’ll have to decide amongst yourselves who gets the room. The rest of you can make camp in the back. There’s plenty of room under Isobel’s light to keep you sheltered from the Curse.”
“Thank you, Jaheira!” Karlach said excitedly.
Jaheira smiled at Karlach’s enthusiasm and held out a goblet of wine to her. “Please,” she said, her tone suddenly very kind, “be welcome.” She handed a goblet to you as well. “Have a drink.”
“Oh my gods,” Karlach muttered, sharing an excited look with you. 
“To your very good health,” Jaheira said, raising her own cup towards all of you. 
Karlach was practically vibrating with excitement next to you. 
“You’ll have to excuse my friend, Karlach,” you said with a smile. “She’s very excited to meet you.”
She giggled, embarrassed. “Tsh. Yeah.” Her face fell just then, as if realizing she wasn’t being formal enough with her hero. She stooped into a low bow. “I mean… It's an honor. M’lady.”
“I will gladly drink to your health as well, Karlach.” Jaheira’s eyes sparkled with amusement. 
You raised your goblet to mimic Jaheira’s and went to take a sip, but were instead met with the back of Astarion’s hand. Your mouth crushed against his skin.
“You did not seriously just take a sip from a drink given to you by a stranger,” he said in horrified disbelief. 
“I was trying to,” you offered Jaheira an apologetic smile. “I wasn’t expecting to kiss the back of your hand,” you said through clenched teeth. 
Astarion took the goblet from you. “Give me that.”
Karlach had been just about to take a sip, but thought better of it and watched Astarion. 
He sniffed the contents of the goblet. “Klauthgrass,” he said with a wrinkle of his nose. 
“It doesn’t spoil the taste,” Jaheira offered, “if that’s what you’re wondering.”
Astarion rolled his eyes and shoved the goblet back into your hand, training his own hands above his sheathed daggers. “She’s trying to feed you a truth serum.”
“Astarion,” you said calmly, as if soothing a startled animal, “it’s okay.” You set the goblet down and reached for both of his hands, pulling them away from his daggers. “She just wants to protect her people. You can respect that, can’t you, my love?”
“Ah,” Jaheira nodded. “‘My love.’ It is admirable that the cub wants to protect his mate.” 
“She’s not-” Astarion sputtered. “We’re just-” He groaned loudly. “I don’t trust you,” he pointed an accusatory finger at the Harper. 
“Oh no,” her tone was flat again. “How ever shall I sleep tonight.”
Before Astarion could protest more, you took a sip of the drink. 
He gasped. “Darling, what do you think you’re doing?”
“Building trust,” you said, smiling at Jaheira.
Her features echoed your own and she took a sip as well. 
“Ah, what the hells,” Karlach said. “Bottoms up!” She downed her own goblet.
“You’re all idiots and I hope you die,” Astarion crossed his arms. 
Shadowheart laughed. “Isn’t the whole reason you’re being so dramatic because your mate almost died?”
“Watch yourself, cleric,” his words were icy, but Shadowheart couldn’t contain her snort.
Jaheira took another sip. “Well over a century old and yet it hasn’t lost a hint of its flavor.”
“Let’s have a taste, then,” Wyll pushed his way forward and took the goblet from you.
“I must see for myself if Astarion’s suspicions are warranted,” Lae’zel took Karlach’s goblet, “and if the wine is as good as this woman says.”
“No, no,” Astarion said sarcastically, “let’s all partake in the poison! Shadowheart? Gale? Halsin? What’s stopping you?”
Shadowheart crossed her arms. “I’ve packed my own wine that I don’t plan on sharing with you all, thank you very much.”
Gale, meanwhile, appeared to be reading a book he’d found discarded somewhere in the bar. “Pardon? Is something the matter?”
Astarion rolled his eyes and turned to Halsin who held up his hands in surrender.
“I rarely imbibe, the stuff goes right to my head. I doubt anyone wants to see that.”
“Mmm, yes, save it.” Astarion turned back to you and the others. “So we’re all going to tell the truth now, that’s great. Go ahead, Jaheira, ask away.”
“There’s an air about you,” she said, addressing you instead of the seething vampire to your right. “Something… alien.”
“Can’t imagine why,” Astarion muttered.
“Answer me true and do not lie,” she didn’t flinch when Astarion scoffed, and pressed on. “The parasite is changing you, isn’t it?”
You could feel the effects of the serum willing your mouth to form a truthful answer. You let it. “It’s trying to change me. To win me over. But I’m resisting its temptations.”
Jaheira looked you up and down. “And you’re certain you will continue to resist?” 
You nodded. “Yes.” The truth.
“Good,” you saw Jaheira’s shoulders relax. “I will take your word for it. And hold you to it, too.”
You looked over at Astarion, whose arms were still crossed. He scowled at Jaheira who turned to address him this time.
“I have every reason to be cautious.” She exhaled a frustrated sigh. “I’ve traced people like you.”
“Oh, have you.” Astarion rolled his eyes for what was likely the tenth time this evening.
Jaheira tilted her head. “People with parasites in their brains. All the way here from Baldur’s Gate.”
“A long journey, indeed,” Gale said.
Astarion laughed humorlessly. “Good of you to finally join us, Gale.”
Wyll cleared his throat. “And what of the city?” 
Jaheira turned to him this time. “The cult of the Absolute is spreading through the Gate. Quietly, quickly, and with unsettling deliberation.” 
“Gods…” Wyll breathed. “My father…” Gale patted his arm reassuringly.
“We tracked them to this ancient village,” Jaheira looked down at a map in front of her displaying the entirety of the Shadow Cursed Lands, and pointed to a village not far off, “only to be faced with a man we killed and buried over a century ago.” 
“Who was - is - he?” you asked, furrowing your brow. 
Jaheira paused briefly when she saw Karlach yawn. “General Ketheric Thorm. Remember that name. He’s the leader of the Absolutists.”
“How can we help?” you stepped forward, determined.
“Ugh,” Astarion pinched the bridge of his nose. “Really, my sweet, is now the time to be playing hero?”
“The vampire is right,” said Jaheira. “We can save this discussion for the morning.”
“Vampire?” Astarion repeated, laughing lightly. “What do you- I’m not-” he slumped. “What gave it away?”
She smirked. “Nearly everything about you. And I have experience with your kind.”
You and your companions snickered, and Astarion shot you all death glares. 
“Yes well… it’s been such a delight chatting with you, Jaheira, but I think now’s the time to discuss the room situation.” Astarion turned around so that his back faced Jaheira, effectively cutting her out of the conversation. 
She laughed. “When you decide who gets the room, it’s next to the bar, on the right.” Just as she was about to leave and take care of other matters, she turned back. “Do keep it down if it’s you two who get the room,” she gestured to you and Astarion. “The walls aren’t as thick here as you think they are. Those sitting around the bar will hear you and tell me all about it and I’d… prefer to remain in the dark if it’s all the same to you.”
“Jaheira!” Astarion scoffed. “What do you think of me?”
“Prove me wrong, vampling,” she winked at you and went on her way.
Shadowheart placed her hands on her hips. “Go on, Astarion. Make a case for why the two of you are in desperate need of the room.”
Astarion looked at his nails. “Well, darling, it’s just that we’ve had such little time to ourselves-”
Halsin interrupted. “I’m… going to set up camp outside. I yield my claim to the room and will gladly sleep under the stars. Or… I suppose there are no stars here. Regardless-” he turned on his heel and walked out the front door to reunite with your ox cart full of camp supplies.
“I’ll join him,” said Wyll.
“Right behind you,” Karlach agreed.
“Okay,” Gale looked around at those remaining. “That leaves four of us, considering you two as a unit.” He pointed between you and Astarion, the latter of which looked offended, but you grabbed his hand and squeezed it before he had a chance to argue.
Lae’zel adjusted her greatsword in her arms. “It is tradition among githyanki that those who performed best in battle should have the most comfortable sleeping chambers.”
Gale furrowed his brow. “Is that true? I’ve yet to read anything about that in my extended research on the githyanki people.”
Lae’zel shrugged.
Shadowheart spoke next. “It’s just that I drained so much of my magic healing everyone on the battlefield today. I think I deserve to sleep in comfort to replenish my power since we have no clue what tomorrow brings.” Then she quickly added, “Since we’re in her domain, I’d say it’s as if Lady Shar herself wills it.”
Astarion snorted. “Like hells she does.” He turned to Gale. “And what’s your excuse?”
“The knees,” Gale said, bending his knees for you all to hear an audible crack. “Too many nights on the ground will do no favors for one’s aching joints.”
You could see where this was going. There would be a constant back and forth until a loud argument inevitably broke out in the middle of the inn. You knew it was a bit devious, but you decided to get the jumpstart on ending the argument. 
You took Astarion’s hand. “Come on, Astarion,” you said with a sigh, “we can rough it outside for another night.”
He didn’t budge. “You can’t be serious, darling.”
“I am serious- Oh.” you paused in trying to get Astarion to follow you and reached for your right side. “Ow,” you said slowly.
Astarion said your name, his voice laced with worry.
“Oh gods,” you blinked your eyes several times, tears filling your vision.
“Tell me what’s wrong,” Astarion brushed hair out of your face and placed his hands on your cheeks. 
“I don’t know,” you said shakily. “I suddenly got a sharp pain in my side. I think my wound may have opened again.” 
“Oh for gods’ sakes,” Shadowheart rolled her eyes and held out her hand to scan you for injuries with her magic. “You know what, if it’s that important to you, you can have it.” With that, she left after the others.
“Are you alright?” Gale asked. 
“I know what would make her feel better,” Astarion said, catching on to your ruse. 
“Do not say the room,” Lae’zel glowered at him.
“The room,” Astarion said anyway. 
“Chk,” she spat. “Fine. Have your precious alone time. But when they kick you out for pleasuring each other too loudly, I get the room in your stead.”
“Uh… if that’s the case, she can have it after you two.” Gale smiled painfully. “I shall concede as well. If only so I can grab some shut eye without your loud-”
“Ooowww,” you moaned.
“Good gods, man!” Astarion exclaimed, clutching you to his chest as if you were made of glass. “How can you think of sex at a time like this! My precious treasure is wounded!”
“I mean, Lae’zel alluded to it first-” Gale pointed to where Lae’zel had been standing, only to see that she had already left. “Ah. I guess I’ll take my leave as well.”
“Ow! Gods, it hurts!” you wailed. “Get out of here!” Astarion practically yelled at the wizard.
Gale sighed. “Goodnight you two.”
“Goodnight Gale!” you called after him sweetly.
When he turned back to look at you, you were limp in Astarion’s arms, one of your own arms thrown dramatically over your eyes.
“Now look what you’ve done!” It was Astarion’s turn to wail. 
“Alright!” Gale turned and held up his hands in frustration. “I’m going!”
When he was finally gone, Astarion pulled you into him for a long, passionate kiss. “You are the perfect woman,” he breathed, resting his forehead against yours. 
“I’ll have to remind you of that the next time I annoy you,” you laughed and took his hand, leading him to the room.
Jaheira’s voice sounded from the second floor, “I would appreciate it if you did not yell while my Harpers and our guests are trying to sleep.” Despite her stern tone, her expression revealed mild amusement. 
“Sorry, Jaheira,” you whispered loud enough for her to hear you from the railing she bent over. 
“Good night, cubs.” She waved her hand and left you and Astarion to settle into your room.
~~~~~
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Unfortunately tumblr thought this piece was too long (WHOOPS!) so I had to split it into two parts. The second part can be found here.
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kingstealer · 1 year ago
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he recognizes g'raha tia on sight, of course. a bit older, a bit wiser-sounding, a bit more covered in crystal the same blue as the tower, but underneath it all the bones of the allagan-blooded youth are visible.
he denies it--he would. and tchos doesn't have the heart to pry into a lie so flimsily constructed and held up as an unbreakable shield. he lets it stand. gives it time.
there are more important things to do anyway. so they end up colleagues, again. saving a world they aren't from but that belongs to the exarch, to the man who built a city from the bones of a scared (but not broken) people. a man who woke to a very different situation than be expected, but wielded the tower's might regardless.
but there are stolen moments, where that shield bends. any time the exarch mentions his old friend, his inspiration. and tchos recognizes the fondness in his voice for what it is (no longer idolization. an ideal, one that's here in the flesh now, and that scares him), and lets it lie. they visit the dwarves together, they share plans for the future on an outcropping in kholusia. tchos can't stifle the fond smile that time, or the thought that maybe there is still something here. if the shield, the hood, comes down.
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which it does. brutally.
there isn't enough time to react before g'raha is torn away, tchos shattering from the inside out with rage and the sheer amount of Light in his bloodstream. something deep within his soul roils, gorges, but even that isn't enough to get him on his feet, to get him to stop coughing up light.
and the exarch is gone, but so is g'raha.
he gets him back--fights to the fading remnants of a long-dead civilization and the dying gasp of a man who's been tearing down worlds for so long he's forgotten exactly why.
and they're together, the catboys, but there's still so much to be done.
late night research and a few months of quiet yearning, of half-started conversations, does not a relationship make. but they know each other for equals now, even busy as they are, and there's an understanding--after this is over, when there's a break, they'll do this for real.
and then elidibus, clothed in the form of a long-dead hero, arrives.
and then, they're chasing him up the crystal tower, to end yet another ascian threat to this fragile, fragile peace.
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i'll hold them off, the one who was and still is the exarch says. but rest assured you haven't seen the last of me.
and v'tchos grabs him by the robes and hauls him in. and kisses him.
i'll hold you to that, he says, and takes off up the steps, greatsword in hand.
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elidibus is defeated, together, but at great cost--the exarch is now merely a statue. watching over his city.
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but g'raha tia's story isn't done.
tchos is a maelstrom of energy, barely staying in the rising stones long enough to explain before throwing himself across the plains of mor dhona at breakneck speed.
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perhaps leaving the soul vessel at the door to the tower would have been enough, and the tower would have done the rest. this doesn't even occur to v'tchos. he pushes the door open without stopping, not leaving until he can help raha stumble out of the tower back to the rising stones (his new home, as long as he needs it) and the scions.
he doesn't notice until later that one of his teal-green eyes has bled to allagan scarlet. aether, and souls, are often unknowable, as hard as we may try.
and finally, though there are still, always, many things to be done--these two catboys have time to just be.
(be gay, that is.)
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zafulz · 5 months ago
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Regarding SotE's ending.
Spoilers ahead, rant.
I'm a dissappointed on the fandom always wanting to take sides for the most nuanced narratives ever written in games, sometimes it feels like we play different games at all. They want to excuse other demigods and put the blame on the ones who wanted to changed the status quo, when we all should realize how the Greater Will and the Outer Gods had influence and have been the ones to actually be playing chess with their tragic fates. Radahn and Morgott wanted to keep and perpetuate Marika's / Golden Order rule, Miquella, Ranni and Rykard wanted to get rid of all the Gods (using the Stars/Moon, destroying gods or becoming God themselves), and Mogh, Malenia and Godwyn had their fates taken by Outer Gods/Plots. They were all played and incited by the horrors of Marika, under the Greater Will. Remember that Marika shattered the Elden Ring to rebel against the Greater Will due to all the grief and most recently Godwyn's death, so we can guess she realized too late.
Then, it surprises me how easy we are to label Miquella as a villain without taking all that into the equation. The game changers, following up Ranni's statements, were only Miquella, Malenia (as she was almost ready to become a goddess even before Miquella), and her. Ranni, probably the one who knew all of Marika's record and was already done with the situation of her family and the Lands Between, started this first with killing Godwyn. Miquella just could not keep at delaying the facts during the time he tried to revive his brother and revert his twin curse, leading to despising the Greater Will and deciding to ascend having learned the horrors of the Lands of Shadow and the current state of the Lands Between. The actions taken by them can't be honestly judged at certain human moral standpoint, since we are talking of literal demigods, SOME of them supporting the current status quote where Omens, Demi Humans, Albinaurics, Giants where OBLITERATED to keep the Golden Order's rule. The DLC covers the process in which Miquella decided to walk the same path as Marika, probably for similar "better world" goals, but Marika just followed the Greater Will. Miquella decided to become a god and strip himself from all essence, without any guidance. Is not a mending rune to keep the Elden Ring somehow. The story trailer show us how Marika called the Greater Will, now dried up after thousands of sacrifices, Miquella becomes a God by stripping himself of what attaches him to the world (reminds me of Tales of Symphonia, where Colette is loosing all senses to become an angel or the Avatar State) St. Trina asks us to kill him, because she understood this path will only create another Greater Will-like God, no feelings, just cold stare and control, a caged god.
Now, somethings that aren't clear is how the affection compelling powers works. Miquella shattered his own rune knowing this would remove his "charm" from others. Why he did that? What's the vow Radahn and Miquella made? The cutscene crystal clear shows Miquella is afraid of becoming a god, but taking that decision on this vow.
Probably a fight with Malenia before becoming Lord. Whispered this part on his ear like normal.
A LOT of information is missing, but the point was that there are no " villains" in this game, BUT THE GODS. It is a Man vs God narrative that is very nuanced. Thanks for your time.
Ps. Did you notice this?
Grace and the Gods influence reflect in the eyes. Messmer is final proof of it when he breaks his Grace and Serpent appears isntead, or Miquella showing up with eyes shut, becoming a God himself. Ranni Melina I wish we could have more dialog options and reactions from what we did in this DLC :')
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