#taking inspiration from fern for this one
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apollos-boyfriend · 11 months ago
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SPARKLEZ!
You wouldn't believe the things I've seen. Or maybe you would. What do I know?
Worlds upon worlds of wonder have embraced my many selves. I'm living a thousand lives at once. And those are just the lives I'm aware of. For instance, in a place called Middle Earth I am reborn a beautiful elf queen. And under the ice shield of a moon called Europa I am a strand of plankton. And in a world we both know well, I'm a bunch of little girls who look just like me, and maybe other things too... Anyway, my umbrella consciousness has reformed for just a moment; my caretaker, in his mercy, has allowed me to show you these things.
But you definitely won't believe the most amazing thing I've seen. Lately I've been looking through a window... A window into bygone years. A man sits in front of a screen, speaking his soul to the world while playing a game. I think I know who he is!
I see this man forming friendships with those who also speak to the world. I know who they are too. They project themselves as tiny box figures into a world made of boxes. It's so much less detailed than the world where the man and his friends sit. I would not have known Ruxomar and it's sister dimensions to be so childlike in appearance except by this contrast!
The days go on as the friends play. The boxlike world is ruled by two gods. Of course I know who they are. The man is faced with a choice between the two. His life is riddled with choices! And like the stubborn idealist he is, he carves out a middle path. He'll take neither god. He'll have a goddess all to his own.
He created me.
A man named Jordan Maron created the goddess Ianite in a world beyond worlds. And Jordan Maron looks just like you. He is one of your countless alternate selves. He looks so much less boxy! I think that if I did not already know you and Spark so well, I would call him my favorite version.
Now I grasp the truth I have been seeking all my life. I have see what is above gods. It is ____________.
My umbrella consciousness won't hold much longer. Let me say a few choice words before the final goodbye between this version of you and this version of me. Thank you for choosing to create me. I believe that had the other you not made that choice in that far off world, none of my present selves would exist. In a strange sense, you are my god. Thank you for believing in your creation enough to make it real. Thank you for continuing to love me and make choices for my wellbeing. I hope another you loves another me in another world soon.
If Jordan looks out the window one of these days, he might be able to see me.
Not even creeping. Just fyi.
Forever Your Lady
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spaciebabie · 1 year ago
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cant fucking stand this dude honestly
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jiminscockr1ng · 10 months ago
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✩。°𝄞🚨D-TOWN BABY 𝄞✨°。✩
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╝ •part one | part two ╔
╰₊𓂂➢ pairing: gang affiliated!yoongi x fem!reader
╰₊𓂂➢ genre: hood au, bother’s best friend au, smut, angst
╰₊𓂂➢ warn!ngs: use of the n-word, aave, [mentions of drugs, drug dealing, death, smoking and drinking], negligence due to use of drugs (reader’s mother), reader is heavily black coded, cat-calling, riding, oral (reader receiving), swallowing semen. (let me know if there’s more please!)
╰₊𓂂➢ summary: yoongi is apart of a gang called d-town, the gang your brother just so happens to be apart of.
╰₊𓂂➢ word count: 5,625 words
╰₊𓂂➢ author’s note: the inspiration came from me shouting “D-TOWN NIGGA!” at my sister while watching the Daechwita music video. lmao, i hope y’all enjoy it.
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The headlights of your black honda civic shines on the group of men huddled together on the steps of the project building.
Smoking, drinking, talking and laughing loud as hell, and hitting licks.
You huff while turning your car off. Stepping out, your long, fern green skirt flows with the wind. Cleavage hanging out of your bohemian patterned shirt. As you approach the ran down project building you can hear the men on the stairs whistling at you.
You roll your eyes at the gang members who are shouting and cat-calling loud as hell— the whole block could hear.
“Damn Ma, can I get a 360?!” One of them call out. Before you could even flip him off, two familiar voices chime in.
“Chill, nigga.”
“Shut the fuck up.”
They say at the same time. The two voices could easily be distinguished as Trey (your brother) and Yoongi (your brother’s best friend).
Or their street names: Tre D and Agust D. The ‘D’ standing for D-Town. To which you find corny as hell because you all literally live downtown. All these corny ass niggas’ names end with D.
Once you’re right in front of the group of men your brother nods his head at you. That’s just him acknowledging your existence. The two of you have a complicated relationship. It’s only complicated because you don’t like his lifestyle (respectfully) but he won’t stop gang banging.
Nonetheless, you’d still take a bullet for that man. Vice versa.
“Yo, _______.” Yoongi speaks. From the looks of it, you can already tell he’s about to say some stupid shit. He has that sorry ass smirk on his face and keeps glancing around at his little posse. Leaning your weight on to one leg, you simply arch your brow at him.
“You gon’ let me tuck you in?” Your stoic expression remains the same. A few giggles are heard and your brother shakes his head. Trey is more than used to Yoongi making advances at you— he’s been fiend out for damn there 8 years.
Yoongi looks you up and down, adjusting his duffel bag on his shoulder. You smack your teeth and harshly brush past the men blocking your way up the stairs. Prior to entering the building you yell back at the long haired, pale man.
“Tuck your dick!”
SLAM! You slam the door shut, you can hear the distant instigating behind the door as you walk up the stairs to the shared apartment. Mumbling curse words on your way up.
Yoongi’s smirk never leaves, despite the instigation his crew nagged on about. He likes that shit. He loves it. Your hot temper and all of it. He knows that if he wanted to he could shut you right up. But you being mad at him kind of turns him on… so he’ll let you have it.
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You’d prefer a nice and quiet, empty pathway to your home when you get off from work. You go through enough stress as it is. Another headache is exactly not what you needed.
Stepping foot into the dark apartment, you set your purse down and walk to your room, ready to get in the shower after a long day. The apartment is fairly big compared to the other units. More than enough space for you and your brother. Although, for the past year it’s really just been you occupying the space.
Trey is never home. He’s out and about being Tre D. He stopped coming home about a little over a year ago. It’s just gang related activities after the other, selling drugs, hanging out with D-Town and fucking random girls. Repeat.
It’s reasonable that you gave up on trying to stop him. He’s a grown man now and you can’t sit around all day to inspect your little brother’s everyday life to make sure he’s doing ‘the right thing’. He’s only 2 years younger than you but you always acted as a mother figure. Taking over that role after your mother got sprung out on crack and left you both.
Working your ass off everyday, feeding him and yourself, trying to make sure he’s doing well in school— all a waste of time. Now look. He’s outside of your shared apartment, probably not even going to come up stairs and is making way more money than you.
You regret the day he met those guys. And you regret even more when he dragged Yoongi along with him.
The thought of Yoongi makes you sigh. You pick up your towel to get in the shower, blasting Lauryn Hill as you lather your brown skin with smell-good soap. You manage to decompress in the shower. Tracking wet footprints to your bedroom as you approach the window, you look outside to see if they’re still there.
Yes. Yes they are. Your brother seems to be leaving and you can’t help but notice someone is missing from the gang.
And almost on queue— as if the devil himself set it up… you hear the front door opening. Letting out a groan, you go and peak out of your bedroom door.
“No need to hide, babygirl. Come on out.” Yoongi calls.
You roll your eyes before slamming your door. But like you figured, the door opens right back up and in comes Yoongi. He silently stands in front of the door after he closes it behind him, observing your figure that is semi-hidden behind the white towel you have on. Yoongi already has a little stiffy just by looking at you.
“Stop calling me babygirl you freak, I’m older than you.” You say, responding to the comment he made. He chuckles, walking over to sit on your bed while you apply lotion on your legs. He drops his duffel bag on the ground next to him.
“Yeah, by like a few months.” Looking down at him, you noticed that he’s man spreading, leaning on his arms that are propped up behind him on the bed. Refraining from gulping, you look away.
You don’t respond to him. Instead, you continue on with your nightly routine, pretending that the fine man is not sitting on your bed ready to pounce on you the second you say go. You can hear shuffling behind you as you fix your locs, putting them in the ponytail.
“_______, I got you something.” He says and you reluctantly turn around. This man really doesn’t learn or care to catch a hint. In his hand is a book. A book that you’ve been searching for everywhere and is sold out.
“How…” is all you can mutter out. Out of all of Yoongi’s highly prestigious and unusual gifts he attempts to give you, this has got to be the best one yet. Best, because you actually wanted it. Not that that Birkin Bag was easy to donate— that was a struggle.
“Uh— I saw you were looking for this shit everywhere on your spam.” You furrow your eyebrows.
“Why the hell are you on my spam page?!”
“So I had drove damn there 2 fucking hours to get this shit.” He says, ignoring the previous question.
You love it. You want to snatch the book out of his long slender fingers, throw your bonnet on and start reading immediately. But—
“I can’t take that Yoongi.” The sentence isn’t something that he hasn’t heard before. You tell him every single time he comes up to your apartment trying to hand you something he bought for you. You never take shit from him and if you do, it gets donated almost immediately.
He scoffs. Honestly looking a little pissed off— fed up to be exact. “What do you mean you can’t take it? Didn’t you hear me, _______?” He stands up, book still in hand. “I drove 2 hours for a fucking book!” He exclaims.
It’s not like you’re meaning to be a bitch. You’d just rather not take anything that was bought with drug money. Even the book you’ve been dying to read for months.
“Listen Yoongi—”
“Agust D.” He corrects.
“I’m not calling you that shit!” A smile cracks onto his face. Just a small one. Because, as mentioned before, he loves that shit. But he’s still fed up.
“I can’t take that. It’ll be donated just like the other gifts you attempt to bribe me with.” You say and he sets the book on the bed, stepping closer to you. “I’m not bribing you _______. I just wanna spoil you, just let me do that.”
“No! I don’t want anything you or my brother buy with your fucking D-Town money. You can keep all of that shit!” You roar while waving your arms around. He sighs, running his fingers through his long black hair, letting it fall back in place. “Money is money, _______.”
“I’m not doing this with you, Yoongi.” Arguing with him back and forth is like arguing with a wall. You two could go on and on about the lifestyle he and Trey are choosing to live.
Yoongi walks up behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist. You don’t pull away. Despite how stubborn you are, you’d never deny Yoongi’s touch whenever you feel him. It’s instant stress relief.
“I’m trying, _______.” He calmly says in your ear. The disembodied voice— so husky yet smooth. It sends shivers down your back and all of the hair on your arms stand tall.
“Try harder then.”
“Why are you like this?” You scrunch your face up. “Like what?!” You can feel him shrug his shoulders behind you.
“Like… stubborn and petty.” Offended, you scoff.
“Stubborn and petty like your mama?” It was a quick little insult— a joke! Everyone says it. Plus, you had to think of a come back quick or else you know Yoongi would’ve known that you knew what he said was partially accurate. But when you feel the tight hold Yoongi had around your waist loosen… you knew you fucked up.
“You know my moms’ is dead.” You immediately twist your body around to face him, your towel nearly unraveling. You quickly catch it. “Omg, I did not mean it like that, for real. I was just saying shit!” You ramble on and on about how you don’t think before speaking and how sorry you are.
Then he laughs. Like actually laugh. Not a corny little smirk or the low chuckle he does when he’s around his boys— not even a light smile. He gave you his infamous, gummy smile, shoulder bouncing laugh. He even threw his head back for a second.
You really couldn’t help but smile. You missed that laugh. Having been reunited with it after so long makes you forget everything said and done. Because that’s the Yoongi you know, the Yoongi you grew up with, the Yoongi you loved. You smile at the taller man still looking at you with that cute gummy smile even after the laughter died down.
“Stop apologizing _______, I was just fucking with you.” You scoff but the smile never fades, even when you playfully punch his shoulder. “That’s not funny!” He nods his head in agreement as if he wasn’t just literally laughing his ass off.
“It was just funny seeing you speak like that. First time in mad long you didn’t have that stick that you love so much up your ass.” Looking up at him, you can’t even be mad at what he just said. Not when all the old feelings were suddenly rushing back in. The ones you fought off years ago.
“Yeah,” you switch your focus onto the ground. “It was nice seeing you laugh like that.” His fingers lightly grip your chin to lift your head back up to look him in the eyes. Your heart is doing backflips but in your head there are a million different alarms going off, screaming ‘abort!’.
“You always make me laugh. Whether I’m laughing around you or at home in my bed, laughing about something that you said. You make me…” He trails off making you furrow your eyebrows a bit.
“Make you what?” He sighs, scratching the back of his head, looking out of the window. You shove his shoulder to get his attention again. “Make you what?!” He looks down at his shoes as if the answer was written on them. They weren’t. You checked.
“You make me… hmmph.” He mumbles and you slap your hands on your naked thighs in frustration. You grip his face in your whole hand to get him to stop looking around the room helplessly, like a mother trying to force feed their child.
“What!” You scream.
“Happy!” He reciprocates the volume, eyes going wide when he finally lets the shit flow free. Your hand slowly drops from his face. “Damn— satisfied?” He sassily asks, rolling his eyes. Too in shock to even say anything, you just stand there with your eyebrows high, looking like a dumbass.
“_______,” he starts, earning you attention. So many thoughts sprint through your mind as you stare up into his sharp brown eyes. It’s really hard to believe that after everything, he still found happiness in you. You can’t recall the last time you felt happy in Yoongi’s presence. The man that you once loved. You and Yoongi never dated, never slept together, never really announced any feelings for each other either. The relationship the two of you had was unspoken. You knew the love was there— he did too, and that was enough.
“I need you to know, that I want you.” He says seriously. Your heart drops at the words. No.
No, not now. Why now?
“I want us, _______.” You could melt underneath his gaze. You feel yourself slowly folding. Ready to submit and give into him— give into your heart that’s been begging to be his for 7 years now. “Tell me you want this too.”
Yes, tell him you want this. Want all of him. Because you do… but you can’t. It’s not the same. This is not the same as it was 7 years ago. Yoongi isn’t the same. You can’t do it.
“I can’t— I don’t… want this.” You try to stand strong but you’re weak. Yoongi always did that to you. “You don’t or you can’t— which one is it?” He says, already knowing the answer. He needs to hear it from you though. You sigh, closing your eyes. “Yoongi—”
“No _______ tell me right now why you can’t just let us be happy?” Yoongi’s frustration is valid. But so is yours. You try to walk away from him, to get away, like those alarms that kept going off in your head a few minutes ago told you to do. But Yoongi isn’t having it. He already laid his heart out there, he just wanted you to take it— for it to be yours. So he grabs your arm. “Don’t walk away from me.” You yank your arm back immediately.
“I fucking can’t Yoongi! You want me to stand here, laugh, ‘kee-kee’ in your face. Tell you I want you and that I want this just for you to go back to the streets the next second someone calls you.” You’re out of breath from all of the screaming, no doubt the neighbors were gonna report. But you aren’t done.
“D-Town tells you to jump, you ask how high. I ask you to get your life together, to get off of the streets and I’m left with the same answer. I’m not gonna be one of those bitches that hold you down when you decide to get into some dumb shit and I’m damn sure not gonna be the person people have to get in touch with because their fucking boyfriend died doing some fuck shit.” The undertone of your face is red and your hands are shaking. “It’s bad enough my brother is in to deep. I’m not trying to have to worry about someone else.”
Yoongi’s tongue pokes the inside of his cheek as he takes in everything you said. You’ve never been this vulnerable. With anyone. You’ve never said any of this to anyone but you don’t want to keep having the same interactions over and over with him.
“I understand.” Is all he says. And it’s all he has to say. You know he’s not gonna quit the streets until the streets quit him. After all, that’s how it works. But he really did understand and if that’s how you feel he won’t push it.
“Can I just lay with you?” Before you can even protest he raises his hands to clarify. “Just for tonight. Can you please… just do this for me? Let me lay with you.” You sigh, over analyzing the possibility. In the end you conclude it was fine. So you grab your pajamas and change in the bathroom. When you come back in, Yoongi is already laying in the bed. Shirtless and wearing nothing else but the pair of basketball shorts he had in his bag. The book resting on your nightstand.
Your pajamas includes a sage green tank top and a beige pair of cotton shorts. You lie next to him in your bed after cutting the lights off. His body instantly cuddles into yours.
“Yoongi,” you call out. “Your head is on my boobs.” He chuckles into the pair before raising his head to look at you. “You used to always let me lay on your boobs. They’re comfortable.” He says with a faint pout, poking your plushy boobs with his finger, making you flinch.
“Yoo— will you stop poking me!” You say frustratedly. “It tickles.” Yoongi perks up at that. “It tickles, huh?” He sings, continuing to poke you. His fingers pokes at your chest, your sides, your neck. You try to fight him off but your laughter is making you weak. “Stu— stop!” You cry out and he just giggles at your plea. It’s really over once he hovers his body over yours, locking yours in place underneath him.
Your face hurts from laughing so hard, can’t even manage to fight it anymore. The poking eventually stops but the soft giggles and toothy smile on your face doesn’t falter. Yoongi’s eyes sparkle as they bore into yours. He carefully places his hand on your cheek, thumb caressing your lifted cheekbone.
“You’re so pretty, _______.” He observes your features from above and his heart pounds against his chest. The pace aligned with yours. “Sometimes,” he nuzzles his head into the crook of your neck. “I forget just how pretty you are. So I come to bother you— just to see you. But when I have you this close… you make me want to leave everything else behind just so I can be with you.”
That’s all you really wanted. For Yoongi to leave all the bullshit alone. Maybe then you two could work.
But you know that all of this is just pillow talk. Yoongi would never do that. Not for you. Not for anyone. “Don’t say things you don’t mean, Yoongi.” You speak mellowly. He lifts his head out of your neck to look at you again. “I can’t tell you how I feel now?” You roll your eyes. “You can but don’t sit here and lead me on to believing in a lie.”
He doesn’t respond. You feel his lips on your cheek. Eyes widening, you look at him in confusion. “What are you—”
“I’m not lying to you, _______.” He kisses your forehead. “Even with everything that happened, no matter what you say to me— I never told you a lie and I don’t plan to.” He leans in to give you another kiss but pauses. His face just an inch away. Your breath hitches at the close proximity, growing nervous when his eyes focus on your lips.
“Can I kiss you?” He whispers softly against your lips. Your mind isn’t working. There’s no alarms blaring, no weird gut feeling, just you. Underneath him. Without much thought, you mutter a breathy “yes.”
He leans in, his lips molding perfectly with yours. It’s soft and passionate and you’re worried that you just might have a heart attack the way your heart is pacing. Your fingers travel their way through his long strands of hair as you happily taste the minty flavor of his mouth— covering up the taste of cigarettes. When he pulls away to catch his breath, you immediately pull him back down. Now that you got a taste of him, you don’t want to let it go.
The kiss starts getting heated when Yoongi rolls off of you and pulls you on top of him. His hands roam the surface of your back, letting them slip under your tank top. You bite on his bottom lip once you pull away, letting your soft brown hands travel up his abdomen to his solid chest. Your back arches as you leave open mouth kisses against his chest. He takes the opportunity to cup your ass into his hands, occasionally squeezing the fleshy rump.
You slightly shift your hips up against him to lift up. “Fuck,” Yoongi lets out a shaky breath. “Don’t move like that.” You furrow your brows in confusion but you quickly understand when you feel something poking your thigh. In shock, you shift again. A low groan leaves Yoongi’s mouth and he places his hands on both sides of your waist.
You watch as his eyes squeeze shut, the action and the sound he let slip gave you that tingling feeling in your stomach, that familiar sensation fluttering in between your legs. You do it again. Wanting to hear that sound from him again.
“Seriously, you don’t want this to go further than it already has.” True. You don’t, but you’re a little too lust filled to think straight. And the fact that Yoongi is hard as a rock underneath you has you wet. Grinding your clothed sex onto his bulge.
“Yo, I—”
“Shut up.” You say, placing your hands on his chest to support yourself as you grind against him. The lewd sounds that escape from both of your mouths flood the room. Yoongi’s basketball shorts get bunched up in the process, the repeated action dragging the band down, exposing his boxer briefs underneath.
You lift your hips up to pull the shorts down but Yoongi stops you. He sends you a warning look that reads, ‘don’t do this.’
Regardless, you enthusiastically yank them and his boxer briefs down his thighs, letting his dick stand tall against his lower stomach. “_______, you’re confusing me.” He says while you’re busy scrapping to get the clothing from around his ankles, satisfied when they hit the floor. You turn around, looking down at him once again.
“You’re confused? Hm, I thought you were hard.” Speaking sarcastically, you turn your focus onto Yoongi’s member. You grip his length in your hand, brushing your thumb over his sensitive tip making Yoongi twitch.
“A little bit of both honestly. I mean, mostly hard but— woah woah woah, stop!” Yoongi panics once you put your mouth on his dick. He immediately sits up, his back resting against the head board. “I’m not doing this with you.” He says, to which one of your eyebrows flick up.
“Why not?” You scoff. “You don’t seem to have any problem fucking all these other bitches.” Yoongi lets out an unamused laugh, wiping his hands over his face. “You’re not other bitches. You don’t throw yourself on my dick.”
“I just did!” Technically, you did.
Yoongi scoffs, mumbling something under his breath. “It’s not the same thing. You’re invested in this _______ and you know it.” You turn your head away from him, not wanting to hear the truth. “I don’t need you to have another reason to hate me.” Rolling your eyes—
“I don’t hate you.”
“You’re just saying that.” You shake your head, scooting closer to him. “I’m not. I don’t hate you, Yoongi.” You repeat, your fingers go to his hair and you focus on the way his dark hair fall on your skin before looking at him again. “And right now… I’m horny, so.” You sit in front of him, anticipating his response.
“Okay.” He shrugs.
“Okay, what?” He grabs your waist gently, pulling you closer to him. Your lips lock onto his again and this time, the pace quickens. Yoongi’s hands reach for your tank top to pull it over your chest, you lift your arms as he pulls it off, slinging it across the room. Like clockwork, you drag your shorts down as well, tossing them in the corner without a care in the world.
Yoongi’s hands roam all over your body. Taking in the feel of your body being close to his. He retracts from the kiss to drool over your body. His pale hands over your brown skin, the only source of light coming from the window. “What do you want me to do, _______?” He asks, palming your breast in both hands. You bite your lip as you look down at him touching you.
“Can I ride you?” You ask in a whisper and you could’ve swore you felt Yoongi’s dick twitch on your thigh right after the words fell off your tongue. He felt like doing a backflip. An ability he doesn’t have but that’s how you make him feel. It’s just like you to want to ride him— it being your first time even having sex with each other.
“Fuck yes.” You let out a giggle at Yoongi’s expression before leaning over to open the top drawer of your nightstand. His eyes travel with your every movement. “What are you doing?”
“Grabbing a condom.” You popped out. He purses his lips at that. “Guess I’m not the only one you’ve been wrestling in the sheets with.” Looking back at the man with the condom in your hand, the jealous look on his face makes you want to run over to your phone to take a picture. Instead you laugh.
“You’ve got to be kidding me.” You say, ripping open the packet. “I bought them because they’re a necessity. I’m not fucking anyone— but i’m glad I did buy them.” Yoongi raises an eyebrow in curiosity. “I’d rather not have the neighborhood’s dick in me raw.”
It’s almost comedic the way his jaw drop. “Neighborhood’s dick is cuh-razy!” Slipping the condom on his length, you let out a giggle. Once you’ve got it on all the way you grip his shoulders, lifting your cunt over it. “It’s okay,” you jokingly reassure. “I’ll make sure to give you a good rating.”
“Oh, you got jokes— oh shit.” His demeanor changes once you rub his tip against your wet slit. “Are you—,” He reaches out to drag a finger through your folds. “You’re mad wet.” He states the obvious and when he pulls his finger away, your arousal drags with it. Without a second thought, he lifts his finger to his mouth, sucking on it to taste you. A low moan leaves his mouth. His eyes never leaving yours.
“You ready or did you change your mind?” You shake your head slowly, feeling more aroused than ever. “I’m ready.”
Once again, you maneuver his length through your folds before aligning it at your entrance. You take a deep breath and Yoongi’s hands rub your back. You slowly lower yourself down his length, feeling the pressure of him stretching you out. Your mouth falls agape when his full length is inside of your cunt.
After a few more rounds you get used to it. Yoongi stares at the action of your pussy swallowing his length. Your pussy is so tight around him, he’s afraid he might cum too fast.
He curse in your ear as you begin to ride him faster. “Fuck— you’ve been holding back on me for all these years.” Yoongi moves his hips, helping thrust into you. Your tits jump along with you as you bounce on his cock. So deep, the sound of his balls slapping against your ass echoes throughout the quiet apartment.
“Ah, Yoongi!” You moan out and Yoongi feels himself growing light headed. “You’re making me go crazy, _______.” He slams into your pussy faster— harder. At this point you weren’t even moving. Yoongi was the one in control of your body.
Especially when he moves you off of him, switching positions to take full control. You lie on your back, abandoned pussy and all. “Yoongi, put it back in.” You beg.
He shushes you before bending down, face in between your legs. His mouth attacks your wet cunt. He flatten his tongue to fully taste your sex. Licking and sucking all of you. His mouth sucks on your clit making you scream out in pleasure while his three fingers abuse your hole. “Yoongi, fuck that feels so good.” He slightly smirks up at you.
“Tell me whose pussy this is.” He says lowly. You could’ve came right then and there just from how sexy he said it. All dominant and territorial. The way he looks— his long dark hair sticking to his face and neck.
“Yuh— oh my god!” You moan out as your legs begin to shake at the overwhelming stimulation of his mouth and fingers.
“Tell me.” He demanded a bit louder.
“Yours Yoongi! It all yours, mm.” His fingers moves faster and you grip the sheets for moral support. “F- Fuck me Yoongi. I want your dick inside me.” It doesn’t take long before he obeys. He lifts up, just before you could orgasm and slides his hard dick inside of you. With Yoongi in control now, the pace is much faster. He lifts one of your legs up, putting it over his shoulder for better access.
Going deeper inside of you, hitting all of the right spots. You pull him down towards your body, your nails digging into his back, creating little crescent moon shaped marks. Chest to chest, Yoongi penetrates your pussy as the two of you share a feverish kiss.
“I’m gonna cum, Yoongi.” You say against his lips, out of breath. He rapidly nods his head. “Cum, mm.” His thrusts slow down, instead he makes sure to go deeper, hitting your spot repeatedly, making your legs shake around him. “Cum for me, _______.”
A few thrusts later and you cream on his dick. He pulls out, slips off the condom and starts stroking his dick. You place your hands over his, moving your mouth towards his tip. When the long drags of warm semen pour out you catch every drop of it. Mouth wide open, tongue out— you swallow his cum. Licking the tip afterwards for good measure.
Yoongi’s heavy breathing fills the room as he collapses on the bed. You get up to throw the used condom out and to collect your pajamas off the floor, walking with a bit of a limp. You toss Yoongi his basketball shorts before cleaning yourself up in the bathroom and changing.
When you come back, you find Yoongi already in his basketball shorts lying on the bed still. “Not gonna dip?” You ask, trying to sound nonchalant. You don’t want him to go but you don’t need him to know that. You were just awfully vulnerable and something similar to regret is already creeping up on you.
“Naw, why would I?” You shrug before laying in bed next to him. Not even being able to position yourself, he makes sure he cuddles into you, your face close as hell to his. “So how was the neighborhood’s dick?” He jokingly asks, laughing after. You lightly punch his chest.
“I’m not finna play with you Yoongi.” Yoongi serves you a feigned pout. “Awe, you regretting it already?” You don’t say anything because you really don’t know if you are. You don’t regret the sex because— fuck that was amazing. Best dick you ever had and you really will give him a good rating. However, the things that were said could’ve stayed unsaid. You shared too much vulnerability and that’s not something you’re comfortable with. The last thing you need is Yoongi to throw any of that shit back up in your face.
“I don’t regret it.” You conclude. His arms wrap around your waist tighter, grabbing one of your legs to wrap it around him. “But it won’t happen again. This was a one time thing.”
“But you swallowed my cum.” He pouts again and for some reason you don’t think it’s feigned this time. So you lightly smack his lips. Too much of a distraction.
“Because I didn’t want to get my covers dirty, you freak.” He dramatically raises his eyebrows. “So now I’m back to being a freak.” You sigh because it seems like he’s purposely not paying attention to what you’re actually trying to say.
“Yoongi.” You say seriously making him nod his head. “Okay, I got it. it was a one time thing.” Despite his display of understanding, you can’t help but hear the underlying disappointment in his voice.
You lay in his arms for hours. Neither of you fall asleep, replaying the previous events in your head. You debate with yourself whether or not you’re being in denial, too petty, stubborn, unreasonable. Whether or not you should give Yoongi a chance. Because right now you feel safe. Right now, everything is okay while your head rests against his beating chest. Right now…
“AGUST D GET YO’ ASS DOWN HERE NIGGA!”
You jump. You and Yoongi both lift up— your face of shock is a bit different from his. He knows what it is and you think you do too. That’s why you’re shook as fuck. The shouting and calling through the window doesn’t stop. And when Yoongi arms unravels from your waist, your heart sinks.
“What is that?” You ask.
And when that same, familiar, sorry ass, corny ass smirk that you hate so damn badly form onto Yoongi’s face… you knew.
“That’s D-TOWN BABY.”
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brailsthesmolgurl · 6 months ago
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APPRENTICESHIP
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Preview: Set back in the olden days of China, your attendance was much summoned by Master Li Shen, a renowned Medical Physician that is in need of an apprentice. Known for his stoic personality, your temperance was definitely tested. But, could there be an actual explanation behind his stoicity?
Warnings: This is gonna be quite of a long read for you Zayne girlies out there so pls strap in. Fluff, makes your heart giddy in a funny way. A possible new series.
P.S: I am not a doctor, hence most of the 'medication methods' mentioned in here are for the sake of the plot and is not and shall not be implied to real life practice! Futhermore, I am not a historian so I am not the best at depicting traditional China perfectly, all of the basis of my descriptions are taken off of the Chinese dramas I used to binge on. This story was also highly inspired by this amazing artwork and the most recent memory of his! He is always known as Doctor Zayne in modern days, so why not give it an inspirational twist and make him a highly honoured doctor in the older days of Chinese history! Divider is sourced from here!
READ PART 2 HERE!
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"We had arrived, Miss y/n." Waking up to the jolting of the chariot and the shoutings of the driver. Her head was ringing, possibly a light comatose from the constant bumpiness of the muddy roads for the past fortnight. Rests were only necessary for food and bathroom breaks but other than that, most of the time was spent encaged within the four walls of her chariot. Occasionally, the books may be entertaining; a romance novel, a literary piece and a biography of the great physician named Li Shen. The man named in the biography shall be her soon-to-be-teacher.
Master Li Shen is in need of an acolyte and y/n was called upon to meet him due to her father's connections. The old man boasted her to be a capable physicist, mildly implying his greed to receive a reputable name for his own bloodline. Although y/n father's opinion was distasteful, but she had decided to go through with it. Anything would grant her a better life than to be at home, waiting to be married off to some man who might be thrice her age and a pervert. Marriage is not the one thought she would want at this moment, let alone a marriage that she holds no control over.
Stepping out of her chaise, covered feet coming in contact with rocky pathways and eyes welcomed the sight of the abundance of verdurous greenery. Everywhere she looked, it was aligned with bamboos and wild grasses and ferns, standing on-guard and surrounding a standalone courtyard house. The courtyard house was mostly white and brown, the body of the walls being white whilst stilts were clearly constructed from lumbars. It sat within the same aesthetic framework as its surroundings.
The driver got off of his seat at the front of the chariot and he retrieved y/n's bags from under the chariot. “The master shall await for you in the house. I will get your bags into your chambers later. It is best to bid your greetings to the master as of now.” She heeded his instructions, walking over towards the grand doors of the standing structure. Pushing upon the heavy doors, it revealed a wall with a carved symbol—a standardised design of houses back in the days. The symbol is intricately carved by hand, taking shape of a leaf cradled by a pair of hands. It is a symbol that could only be bear by the best of physicians, an indicator of intermediate medicinal herb practitioners.
To the left, the hallways extended into a total of three rooms. All of the windows aligned with paper maché as windows and doors made out of varnished bamboo wood. On the right, only a set of sliding doors were found, no paper maché to be found on the windowsills and you assumed that is where the treatment room is allocated at. The courtyard in the middle held a small pool of lotus flowers, blooming elegantly on non-rippling waters. A stone table placed next to the pond, with incense burning on a wooden bark. It explains the lingering of a smoky-jasmine scent in the air.
“Y/n right?” A young man revealed himself from behind one of the sliding doors, adorning a cotton Hanfu. His features are sharp, pinched cheeks a good mixture with his chiselled jawlines. But his body was taut, the clothes he wore hung onto his mannequin-like body structure. “I hope the ride here has not taken too much of a toll of you as I could not afford to care for you the next day.” He was just as what was described in his biography. A man that owns an ego higher than his height, with a handsome face but too cold to touch. “Your chambers are located at the end of this hallway. Be awake at dawn tomorrow.”
Y/n laid in her bed at night, listening to the choirs of nocturnal bugs outside of her window sills, the haunting howls of wolves, the ricocheting chirps of the grasshoppers, the piercing screams of the cicadas. The room she was assigned to was fairly large, with more than enough space to fit a double bed and a dining table in it. The room is not anywhere special, it looked oddly familiar to her own room at home but minus the amount of gilt paintings and ornaments. It also reeked of herbs and incense that leaves a smoky aftertaste through one's nostrils. After a short staring contest with the ceiling, her dreamland beckoned and she willingly submitted to it.
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The next day, y/n got jolted awake to screams followed by gibberish that was indistinguishable. Sitting up in a hastened manner, eyes widened and hair messily sat on top of her head. Oh no, the sun is up. She pushed herself off of her bed and scrambled to make herself presentable then proceed to storm off to the treatment room where she was expected to be. Sliding open the bamboo door, and she was welcomed with the sight of a young man wincing in pain, with the master holding a thread in his hands.
"Your habit of waking up to the sun heating up your bottom is unfavourable." Master Li Shen spoke, not sparing her any eye contact as he continued his suturing on the guy's back, and her peripheral vision eyed the man biting down onto a wooden bark to muffle his screams. "Don't just stand there, make yourself useful. Get me the herb in the mortar." And she did as she was told.
A huge gash streaked on the back of the young commoner, now sutured up neatly in measured knots. It seemed like it could have been caused by a blunt force of trauma. "Here." Y/n handed the filled mortar to Master Li and he applied it onto the wounds, the patient of his hissing in response. "How did he obtained this wound?"
"Whiplash, he said it was an accident, but judging by the wet patch at the front of his pants, I assume it's intentional for the whipping, just not expected for this aftermath." Hearing that, her face heated up at the context that she was provided with. Men of lower classes clearly have lesser safety measures when it comes to fulfillment of their kinks. "Serve him a cup of tea that would suit his current conditions. He has sutures and a mild fever from the infection." Then the physician got up, his outfit emitted his elegance, long and flowy, just like his hair; a symbol of virility in this age.
Once Master Li had left the room, y/n scooted over to the tea table, looking at the array of loose tea leaves at her disposal. She took up the small tea pot, and filled it up with the chosen tea leaves before brewing it for the patient. Amidst waiting, she decided to observe the lotus flowers in the courtyard. She slid open the door and there is Master Li, sat at the stone table, with a calligraphy brush in his hand and a scroll laid out in front of him. "Master Li." Y/n mustered up the courage to approach him. "I apologise for my tardiness this morning. I did not mean to be late."
He looked up, hazy green eyes glanced at her. His hand still hovering over the scroll. "Being tardy is not professional, it is not tolerable for me. Do not repeat that mistake, do you understand y/n?" She nodded quickly and sat yourself opposite him, watching him quietly as he started producing strokes of words on the scroll. His handwriting is surprisingly neat, and fulfills the box-like characters for Chinese writing. So he is not only a good physician, but also has good handwriting. When he is done, he set the brush aside and looked up at her again, expressionless. "I will be setting into town tonight to gather some herbs. Would you like to come with?"
"Yes, I would love to. I have not been here before." She smiled at him and the man in front of her sighed contently. Getting up to retrieve his scroll and he walked towards the room the patient is in. "The tea should be brewed by now, you should serve it while its hot. After you're done with this patient, you may rest and I shall see you later during dusk."
Two hours was spent on treating the oncoming patients and Master Li Shen had asked her to tend to them as he had some other matters to care about. The patients ranged from having a mild cold to obtaining wounds from their harsh work. The only weird case of the day was surprisingly the one that she woke up to early in the morning. Throughout the treatment process she got to hear what the patients have to say, particularly this old lady with the surname Hwang. "He is a lovely young man you know? He never charges us a single penny and always prepares chrysanthemum tea for me to bring home. Even on the days I am not sick, I could come over just to have a cup of tea with him and talk."
"I see." Y/n replied with her back turned towards the lady as she was preparing the medicated powders for the lady to bring home to her granddaughter. "Does Master Li Shen talk a lot?"
"He does, but not as much as he does for listening." The old lady chuckled, her sign of age disappearing for a moment whenever she smiles. "I was telling him the other day that my granddaughter is almost at the age of maturity. I figured I could introduce them together. It would be nice to get her to marry a physician, especially one who is so good looking and kind like him."
The load of information caught y/n off guard slightly, not being able to properly process it as she did not know him well enough to be a judge of character just yet. She instead, focused on the task at hand, wrapping up the earthly toned powder in a thin piece of brown paper and wrapped it with some thin bamboo strips and turning to face the woman, placing the packed medicine onto the table and sliding it over to her. "I guess marrying your granddaughter to a physician may not be a bad idea afterall." Slender fingers tapped onto the medicine pack. "Mix this with hot water and drink it twice a day. If she does not show any signs of improvement, you may bring her back next week."
After the dismissal of the old lady, y/n walked her out towards the main entrance. Upon arriving at the main entrance, the heavy wooden doors were pushed open and her hands unconsciously held the lady's shoulders, backing her up so she would not get hit by the doors given her poor vision. "Master Li Shen." Y/n greeted the towering man that slotted into the entrance and his eyes glanced over towards y/n, and towards the old lady.
"Y/n, Madam Hwang." A curt nod was accompanied with his greeting and he turned towards the young acolyte of his again. "You may get ready, I can lead Madam Hwang back from here." He extended an arm forward for the old lady to grasp onto.
Y/n was slightly reluctant of course. He had only came back and now he has to leave the premise again just to walk the old lady home. She did wished for him to take a rest before the outing with him later in the late evening. "But Master Li Shen, you had only came back from your trip to--"
"I will be fine y/n." The end of his lips pulled up slightly, revealing a small smile of solace. For a man whom had always been content with their own loneliness, having someone who cares for such a minute detail made him felt acquainted. "I shall send Madam Hwang home and await for you in the courtyard for our outing in a bit. Come Madam Hwang, let's get you home." His tone, amiable towards the senior as he slowly walked her out of the premises. It was at this moment that got the young maiden wondering if Master Li Shen had always been such a warm fellow and he is the total opposite of what the rumours had suggested of his attitude.
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The town was much bigger than what she had expected, streets lined with stalls selling various goods, foods and beverages. Lanterns lit up the street in a warm glow, a stark contrast towards the silverish-blue rays of the bright moon for the night. People of all ages flood the street like ants within a colony, busy yet lively. Y/n walked next to Master Li Shen, cautious in herr steps as she does not wish to bump into anyone and cause any trouble.
A kid was shouting something incoherent, the thick accent of his made the dialect sounded like a foreign language. "Watch out." A palm landed onto her shoulders and she was forcefully tugged aside, her other shoulder bumping into something solid and she winced at the interaction. Looking over, y/n noticed Master Li Shen was the one who has his arm around her, a glare sent towards that mischievous kid who charged right towards you earlier. But when he looks down towards the young maiden again, his glare dissipated. "Are you alright?"
"Yes, Master Li Shen, thank you for watching out for me." You bowed slightly, a common courtesy in the olden days to show one's respect to another. His arm around her shoulder dropped and she could feel the heat prickling on her cheeks. Never once, she was touched by a man other than her father. Although the touch does not mean much, it still lingered on her skin.
"You should walk in front of me," she raised an eyebrow at his suggestion. "So you may be safer in this crowd." Nodding her head, she position yourself in front of him and slowly lead him through the crowd, cheeks still burning whenever his chest would accidentally bump into hers due to the crowd flow. The man behind her however, had no issue following behind her, his vision clear given his height difference from the norm. Or so he thought. "You may turn right on the upcoming junction. That should lead us right to the--- y/n?" Looking down, y/n's figure is nowhere to be seen. "Y/n?"
The crowd was too hectic, she had underestimated the crowd flow as she weaved through individuals, totally forgetting the fact she was supposedly accompanied by a giant. Given her small stature, she managed to get past the crowds easily only to find herself lost in a small alley. The darkness loomed over the alley, swallowing everything within its path to blend it within the shadows. Y/n could make out movement from within the shrouded darkness, but it sent goosebumps down her spine. Something does not feel right.
Suddenly, a bony hand reached out from the dark and she cried out as it grabbed onto her arm. The force then started to reel her in, and she could feel her tears surfacing to her eyes, too stunned to fight back. "Let me go!" She shouted in a desperate attempt to flee, head turning towards the crowd to grab someone's attention with her voice. More hands had started to extend from the dark alley to secure her legs and the ends of her dress, ready to drag her into god-knows-what. "HELP---" Another hand slapped itself over her mouth and she was immediately voided of her attempts to free herself as she got dragged into the darkness.
How long has it been? Her eyelids lifted every once in a while, visions went from black to blurred in a few blinks. She was drifting in and out of a state of unconsciousness and her ears could only take in the sounds of someone breathing hard. Her body was jerked back and forth, feet are certainly not on solid ground. But it felt like she was floating?
When y/n managed to snap her eyes open, she shot up while inhaling a breath so sharp it jabbed her lungs. "Careful, you might hurt yourself." The voice got her snapping her head towards the side, seeing Master Li Shen seated next to her, blowing onto the tea cup in his hand. "Here, have some of it. It shall quench your thirst." He handed her the cup that he had blew onto. Sipping onto it, the warm temperature soothes her body immediately.
"What happened?" Y/n asked, placing the tea cup back onto the table and looked at him. The moonlight gleamed through the wax papers of the window sills, an unnatural soft glow coming into the room and lighting his face up just enough to for her to read his expressions, which holds a blank slate. "You just got a little bit of a concussion. Nothing much to worry about." His voice was hushed, cool-headed as always. "You shouldn't have ran off like that, the town is dangerous. Especially for newcomers like you. You're fresh meat alike to them." He then leaned forward with a piece of cloth in his hand. She was too fixated on trying to regain her memories of the happening that she had totally missed out on him wringing out the cloth.
The way she had withdrew herself out of shock halted his movements from reaching his hand out further. He figured it would be best to get her permission before he proceeds. "You have some cuts on your cheek, I am going to clean it for you." So much for asking for her permission, it's more like he is demanding for her face to be served to his treatments. It does make one wonder if he treats all of his patients like this? Demanding.
To Li Shen however, it was more of an act of service. He could care less if someone was found in the state she was in earlier. Finding y/n in the alleyway, strewn on the muddy floor like a puppet as men stood over her, ready to do whatever they had planned to do. Alleys were never known to hold people of high morality and it got Li Shen irked on what he thought they might do to someone so beautiful like y/n. Yes, Li Shen does think of her as a beauty. Hence, he went out of his way to save her. He did managed to save her in one piece, but part of his guilt still troubled him, wishing that he could have stop them from digging their dirty nails onto her skin and causing those scratches and cuts.
"I can do it myself Master Li--" She was paused when he put the wet cloth over her mouth to shush them. He was so close that she could smell the scents of the market she was in earlier. Smells of the sweet tanghulus and freshly made baos, enveloping his usual jasmine-incense musk.
"Please, call me Li Shen from now on. We are quite close in age, there is no need for so much formality." His wet cloth pressed against the cut on the right side of her cheek and she winced in return, cheeks turning the opposite direction due to the stinging pain. "Stay still, it will only hurt a little." His free hand came up, and two fingers were placed under her chin as he turned her head back to face him. His gaze was steady, not on her wound, but staring right into her soul. Those emerald orbs that held a lot of emotions in them, yet she could never seem to read through them.
The tension grew between the both of them, as the staring contest went on. For a moment, she was encaptivated by him, a man so ethereal and smart and mysterious that it makes one want to fall for him. Maybe he is not the same as what the rumours had always suggested. "Li Shen." Her mouth blurted out his name before her brain could even process the emotions and she immediately looked away to hide her embarassment.
When she broke off the eye contact, it got Li Shen to snap out of his own reverie as well. His heart was thumping against his chest when he looked at her a while ago. It was as if the night had gotten longer. She looked ethereal to him too, the shine of the moonlight highlighting her facial features; her big eyes that had always held sincerity in them, soft and plump lips that makes the best smiles and laughters, her long brunette hair that flowed down to her waist, a heart so big that if given the chance to fit everyone in it, she would. She had never changed from the last time he had last seen her.
Li Shen had never really been associated with any females for any romantic relationships. Even when he was introduced to different potential marriage partners, he had never felt the need to be in a relationship. But with y/n, he just knew that it had always been her. Even from young.
"Yes?" It had never felt so right for him to hear her say his name out loud again. But, did she remembered him? Before her last accident? Right before he had left to the city for his physician test? When he had gotten news of her drowning because she fell into a well by accident and only to be awoken to a fresh start for memory collections. Had he ever once popped up in her pretty little head?
He anticipated for her response, trying so hard to not break the ice and to ask her the question he have had the moment he saw her within the candidate pile to be his assistant. However, his anticipation diffused as soon as she answered. "I...I didn't know why I did that. I apologise." Her apology was frowned upon for the wrong reasons, but Li Shen of course, was discreet about it. "I only remembered I blacked out."
"You don't have to know what happened." Li Shen tilted her head back to its initial position and wasted no time in pressing the cloth against her cheek. She hissed this time, biting her lip to stop herself from turning her cheek again and to disrupt his aid. "But you are safe now and that should matter the most." The statement came off to be more bitter than what he had intended to. It was a long awaited sentence. But with the current context of her not even having a slither of memory of him, it hurts him to say it. "The water was mixed with some herbs, it shall promote healing within a couple of days. You had a few cuts on your legs and arms too but I had helped you to apply some medication onto it while you were unconscious just now. I will see you tomorrow morning."
The physician then got up, his height immediately taking up space within her room. She may not know him, but she could tell that he seemed bothered. His sudden change of tone and body language got her curious. Without much thought, she leaned up slightly and grabbed ahold of the ends of his outfit. He stopped in his tracks and turned to look down at her. "I will not run off again next time, Li Shen. I'm sorry for what happened today. And thank you, for saving me." Accompanied with her smile, it only got Li Shen's heart weighing more than ever. The physician only gave her a nod of acknowledgement and sees himself out of her chambers. If only he had never left her from the start, then perhaps, he could have actually saved her.
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OKAY BBYGURLS, this is soooooo long overdued because of a writer's block. Lemme know in the comments if this is worth for a part 2 hmmmm :)))
READ PART 2 HERE!
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magussanctorium-if · 7 months ago
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The Magus Sanctorium. Pentagiim's elite and esteemed school for mages across the continent. Hard to get into with an advanced curriculum and hands-on experience, many would kill to be accepted into the fray. But behind shiny spells and gilded bookcases belies a lit powder keg of pent up tensions and small slights that threaten the whole continent with all out war. A single slip up will light the fuse, so be careful. And don't forget your 7 page essay is due next week!
The Magus Sanctorium is a highly ambitious WIP and new interactive CYOA pair of games. The focus is heavily on romance, relationships, and fantasy adventure with high-replayability value. It is inspired by JRPGs, romance visual novels, any media with a magical boarding school, and Dungeons and Dragons, among others. It will lean more towards a story-based focus, but will have stat-based mechanics.
You play as a new transfer student, having transferred to The Magus Sanctorium after moving continents. Being homeschooled to suddenly thrust into an elite boarding school is a culture shock. As you go about going to classes and making friends, your schooling is abruptly upheaved as war breaks out across the continent. Which house you decided to join determines how the war will affect you and how you can help or hinder your former classmates or lovers.
Note: Because this is still a WIP, some names of characters or places may change during development.
Genre: Fantasy, Romance, Adventure
Rating: 18+
Tracked Tag: #the magus sanctorium
Status: In Development (Outlining)
Demo || Character Introductions || House Introductions || FAQ || Ask Guidelines || Tag Navigation || World Lore || Current Anonymous Survey Form || Dev's Main Blog ||
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Create and customize your character. Select their gender, pronouns, appearance, their proficiencies and deficits, and personality among others.
Choose between 5 different houses each with their own cast of characters. Each student is divided into houses by which nation they come from, not by arbitrary traits.
Decide how to build your stats by choosing which classes to attend and which skills to train in. Influence your house members to train or attend certain classes to boost group skills.
Romance any of the 15 romance options (5 male, 5 female, 5 nonbinary), or select any of the 10 poly routes instead. Choose for a softer romance by picking one of your house members or go for an angsty romance by romancing someone outside of your house.
Build your relationships with your classmates before you're turned against each other and get to know what makes them tick. It pays to have friends across house lines.
Explore and learn about a high fantasy world steeped in magic and years and years of conflict. Perhaps it takes an outsider's perspective to bring about peace...
Participate in a war and potentially reveal long kept secrets that could change the fate of Pentagiim.
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Thalen Oakdane (they/them) - The proud and rigid Leader of the Fern Bears, the house from the Rasuaides Empire. They are strict with their rules.
Sumiel Tidewood (she/her) - The graceful and shy Leader of the Cobalt Snakes, the house from the Espersland Republic. She just wants the best for everyone.
Casithar Seedcloud (he/him) - The young but earnest Leader of the Maroon Rams, the house from the Iseadesh Alliance. He's trying his best.
Ariela Wyvernhair (she/her) - The prickly but well-meaning Leader of the Violet Foxes, the house from the Lupuv Caelait Territory. A rose wrapped in thorns.
Zanis Ironforce (he/him) - The charismatic and cunning Leader of the Sun Eagles, the house from the Quailax Kingdom. He is always 5 steps ahead.
Drelyth Hollymoon (she/her) - The vice-leader of the Fern Bears. She is kind and confident, always pushing herself to aim higher and higher.
Afthel Scalesun (they/them) - A member of the Cobalt Snakes. Quiet and introverted, they prefer the comfort of their books than that of their house members.
Anwyn Greenspear (he/him) - A member of the Maroon Rams. He is a known flirt and playboy, often earning him the ire of his house members.
Lamatri Glowillow (they/them) - The enigmatic and mysterious vice-leader of the Violet Foxes. You barely see them, but they seem to know everything about you.
Traki Goldreaver (they/them) - A member of the Sun Eagles. It's also their first year enrolling. Enthusiastic and energetic, but a work-in-progress.
Azaha Elmbasher (he/him) - A member of the Fern Bears. An idealistic and daydreamer artist who enjoys making life hard for his house leader.
Rumik Gullcaller (he/him) - A member of the Cobalt Snakes. Sumiel's childhood friend, he is protective and intimidating often scaring away most classmates.
Daeri Silkdream (she/her) - A member of the Maroon Rams. A bit ditzy and arrogant, her exaggerated personality belies her true strength.
Saevain Sageblossom (she/her) - A member of the Violet Foxes. Stuck-up and arrogant, she has a family legacy to fulfill as a Prime Magus. But is that what she wants?
Cyian Stonepelt (they/them) - The vice-leader of the Sun Eagles. Gloomy and apathetic, they'd much rather be doing anything else but this.
Poly Romance Options: Thalen & Azaha, Sumiel & Rumik, Casithar & Daeri, Ariela & Saevain, Zanis & Cyian, Drelyth & Saevain, Afthel & Traki, Daeri & Afthel, Ariela & Casithar, Traki & Drelyth
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the-winter-spider · 23 days ago
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Invisible | Part 24
Bucky x reader AU
Word Count:5.2k
Warnings: domestic shizzzzz
A/N: only 3 more to go after thisssss
----
The soft hum of your laptop filled the quiet apartment, the glow of the screen illuminating the living room in the dim light. You were sitting cross-legged on the plush rug, nestled between Bucky’s legs, his long limbs stretched out lazily across the couch behind you. His head rested lightly against the top of yours, his fingers occasionally brushing your shoulder or running through your hair absentmindedly.
“Okay,” you said, scrolling through the list of houses on the real estate site. “What do we think of this one? Three bedrooms, hardwood floors, a cute little backyard… ooh, a sunroom.”
Bucky leaned forward slightly, resting his chin on your shoulder to get a closer look. His voice was warm and teasing as he said, “I don’t know… does the sunroom mean we’re gonna turn into those people who grow, like, way too many plants?”
"You mean like Wanda?" You laughed, elbowing him gently. “What’s wrong with plants? I think we’d rock the plant-parent life.”
“Sure,” he drawled, smirking. “Until I forget to water them and you have to do a dramatic eulogy for a fern.”
“Honestly, Buck,” you said, shaking your head with a grin. “I’m more worried about you accidentally overwatering them. You’re gonna drown them with too much love.”
“Fair enough,” he chuckled, his arms slipping around your shoulders as he leaned back again, pulling you slightly closer. “But the house does look nice. That backyard… you thinking barbecue dinners? Maybe a couple of Adirondack chairs?”
You tilted your head back to look up at him, your grin widening. “You’ve been looking up Pinterest boards again, haven’t you?”
He feigned offense, his blue eyes sparkling with mischief. “I’d never, my design inspiration is completely original.”
“Oh yeah?” you teased, nudging him. “You want to talk about how you tried to convince me that ‘industrial chic’ means leaving random pipes exposed?”
“Baby,” he said, laughing. “That was one time! And in my defense, I thought it looked cool.”
“Uh-huh,” you said, raising an eyebrow. “Well, maybe you should pick the barbecue, and I’ll handle the interiors.”
Bucky nodded solemnly, his hands lightly massaging your shoulders. “Deal. But I’m putting up those little fairy lights in the backyard, that’s non-negotiable missy.”
“Fairy lights,” you echoed, smiling. “Okay..”
You scrolled to the next listing, and Bucky’s hands moved to cradle your face, tilting your head back so he could press a kiss to your temple. “You know,” he murmured, his voice low and full of affection, “this—just sitting here, planning our life together—feels like everything I’ve ever wanted, I can't believe how long it took for me to get out of my head because this, here with you, just even planning this is everything, I can't imagine when we actually have it, i think i'll explode.."
Your chest tightened with warmth, and you reached up to rest a hand on his arm. “It doesn't feel real, I feel like someones going to come and take this all away from me”
His thumb rubbed your cheek "No one will ever take you from me, I'm not going anywhere darlin'"
For a moment, you both sat there, the glow of the laptop forgotten as you basked in the simplicity of the moment. Then Bucky broke the silence with a playful grin. “Okay, but seriously, do you think the sunroom could fit a pool table?”
You groaned, laughing as you turned back to the screen. “You’re impossible.”
“And you love it,” he teased, kissing the top of your head.
As the scrolling continued, you stopped abruptly, your finger hovering over the touchpad. “Wait. Wait. Babe, look at this one,” you said, your voice suddenly tinged with excitement.
Bucky leaned forward, his arms tightening around your shoulders as he peered at the screen. “Three bedrooms,” he read aloud. “Two and a half baths… oooh, a wraparound porch?”
“And a backyard big enough for a garden and a barbecue setup!” you added, your voice rising with enthusiasm. “It even has those big bay windows in the living room—imagine how much light we’d get, we would save on power!!" You squeeked
Bucky’s brows lifted as he studied the pictures. “Doll, this is it. This is the house.”
You tilted your head back to look at him, your eyes wide. “Do you really think so? Like, we’re both imagining living there, right? Sitting on that porch with coffee, having Sunday breakfasts in that dining nook—”
“—Throwing those Pinterest-worthy barbecues in the backyard,” Bucky added, grinning. “You planting a ridiculous number of flowers I can’t name but ill love them all just the same because its you.”
You let out a laugh, your heart racing as the possibilities unfolded in your mind. “It’s perfect,” you whispered
Bucky gently took the laptop from you, placing it on the coffee table. Then, he turned your body slightly so you were facing him more fully. “Hey,” he said softly, cupping your face with his hands. His blue eyes searched yours, his expression filled with that mix of love and certainty that always left you breathless. “Are we really doing this? Finding a home? Building our life?”
You nodded, unable to keep the wide smile off your face. “Yeah, Bucky. We’re really doing this.”
He pulled you into a hug, his chin resting on the top of your head as he held you tightly. “I can’t wait,” he murmured. “To build all of it with you. The house, the backyard, the family. Everything.”
Your heart swelled, and you closed your eyes, savoring the moment. “I love you,” you whispered.
“I love you more,” he replied instantly, his lips brushing against your temple.
You both sat there for a moment, holding each other, until Bucky pulled back slightly, his trademark smirk creeping onto his face. “Okay, we gotta call the realtor before someone else snags this place.”
“Oh my God, you’re right!” you exclaimed, scrambling to grab the laptop. “Where’s her contact info?”
Bucky reached over to help, scrolling until he found the agent’s number. “Here. We’ll call tomorrow, first thing, don’t think she’d appreciate a call at 12:32 in the morning.”
“First thing,” you agreed, grinning. “And if it’s still available, we’re setting up a showing as soon as we can, okay?”
Bucky gave a dramatic fist pump. “I’ll even wear my best henley for the occasion.”
You burst out laughing. “Your ‘best henley? Is that the one without the hole in the elbow?”
“Exactly,” he said, deadpan. “Gotta dress to impress, baby.”
---
It was still dark when you and Bucky slid into the car, thermoses of coffee in hand and the GPS set for Boston. The realtor had scheduled the showing for mid-morning, and while it felt strange to take a day off work, the anticipation buzzing between you made it worth it.
Bucky glanced over at you as he started the car, his blue eyes bright even in the dim light. “You ready for this?”
You smiled, leaning your head against the headrest. “More than ready. What about you?”
He grinned. “I’ve never been more sure of anything. Except…you.”
Your cheeks warmed at his words, and you reached over to rest your hand on his. “You’re getting really good at this whole sweet-talking thing, Barnes.”
“Just stating the facts,” he quipped, giving your hand a squeeze before focusing back on the road.
The drive flew by in a blur of shared playlists, coffee-fueled jokes, and a stop at a diner for breakfast. By the time you arrived in Boston, the sun was high in the sky, and the crisp fall air carried a hint of excitement.
The house stood at the end of a quiet, tree-lined street. It was everything you’d imagined—quaint but spacious, with a charming wraparound porch and a front yard that begged for flower beds.
The realtor, a cheerful woman named Susan, greeted you warmly at the door. “It’s even better in person, isn’t it?” she said, gesturing toward the house.
“It really is,” you murmured, your heart thudding in your chest as you stepped inside.
The moment you entered the house, you knew it was special. The hardwood floors gleamed in the sunlight streaming through the bay windows, and the open layout felt both cozy and expansive.
“This is… perfect,” you whispered, your voice filled with awe.
Bucky was already wandering toward the living room, his eyes lighting up as he imagined the possibilities. “We could put the couch here,” he said, gesturing toward the window. “And maybe a record player in the corner.”
You followed him, your excitement growing with every step. The kitchen was next, with its wide countertops and modern appliances. “This is where I’ll burn pancakes,” you joked, running your fingers over the marble island.
“Correction,” Bucky said, leaning against the counter with a smirk. “This is where I’ll save breakfast after you burn the pancakes.”
You swatted his arm playfully, laughing. “Fair enough.”
The backyard was the final stop—a spacious, fenced-in area with plenty of room for a garden, a barbecue setup, and maybe even a hammock.
Bucky turned to you, his expression soft but determined. “I can see it, you know. Us, here.”
Your throat tightened with emotion as you nodded. “Me too.”
-----
The drive back to New York was filled with an electric kind of energy. The house had exceeded all your expectations, and neither of you could stop talking about it.
“What about the guest room?” you asked, scrolling through the photos Susan had emailed you. “We could turn it into an office.”
“Or a nursery,” Bucky said casually, glancing over at you with a mischievous smile.
Your heart flipped, but you managed to keep your voice steady. “Nursery, huh?”
He shrugged, his grin widening. “You know, for the future. Way in the future.”
You laughed, leaning back in your seat. “Let’s start with putting in an offer, maybe packing, and then we can talk about future plans.”
That evening, after hours of discussing every detail, you and Bucky made the call to Susan. By the end of the day, the offer was in, now all that was left to do was wait.
---
“Think they’ll be happy for us? Y’know if we get it?” you asked softly, staring at your reflection in the mirror. “Even with Natasha and Steve hating me?”
Bucky wrapped his arms around you from behind, his warmth instantly grounding you. He pressed a lingering kiss to the top of your head, his lips brushing against your hair. “Sweet girl, they could never hate you,” he murmured, his voice steady and soothing. “It’s all gonna be okay, okay? We’re gonna get it.”
You leaned back into his chest, his reassurance wrapping around you like a blanket. But the ache of uncertainty still lingered. “I don’t know,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper. “Everything feels so… fragile right now.”
Bucky shifted slightly, turning you in his arms so you were facing him. His hands settled at your waist, holding you securely as his blue eyes searched yours. “Fragile doesn’t mean broken,” he said gently. “It just means we’ve gotta handle it with care, and we can do that.”
A small, involuntary smile tugged at the corners of your lips. “When did you get so wise?”
His mouth curved into a smirk, his thumbs brushing soft circles against your sides. “Been spending too much time with Sam, I guess. The guy’s annoyingly full of wisdom.”
You let out a small laugh, the sound lighter than you’d expected. Bucky leaned down, resting his forehead against yours, his gaze unwavering.
“Sweetheart, listen to me,” he said softly, his tone serious but tender. “Nat and Steve don’t hate you. They’re just dealing with their own stuff right now. And that’s okay. It doesn’t change us. You and me? We’re solid. No matter what.”
His words seeped into you, slowly easing the tension in your chest. You took a shaky breath, nodding. “You’re right, we're solid" You repeated
“Damn straight we are,” he said, his lips quirking into that familiar playful grin that always made your heart flutter. “Now, you ready to show off that gorgeous smile at Sam’s party? Or do I need to give you another pep talk?”
You swatted at his chest, laughing despite yourself. “I think I’m good, but… I’ve been thinking…”
His brow lifted, the grin turning mischievous. “Uh oh, that’s never good.”
“Bucky!” you protested, shoving his chest lightly. But then your expression turned more serious, and his teasing softened instantly as he waited for you to speak. “I don’t want to tell anyone about this yet. About the move, the house… any of it. Not tonight.”
He tilted his head, watching you carefully. “Okay,” he said, his voice gentle. “Why not?”
You sighed, running a hand through your hair. “I don’t want to jinx anything, because if we don't get it…. and I don’t want to deal with anyone saying it’s too fast or that we’re rushing into this. My anxiety’s already—”
“Hey,” he interrupted softly, his hand reaching up to cup your face. “You’re babbling again.”
Your lips parted, but he leaned in, capturing your words with a kiss that melted away your spiraling thoughts. His lips moved against yours, slow and deliberate, until you sighed into him and let yourself relax.
When he pulled back, he rested his forehead against yours again, his thumb tracing along your cheek. “Whatever you want, baby. I follow your lead. Always. You have me wherever you want me.”
Your chest tightened, but this time it wasn’t from anxiety. It was from the overwhelming love you felt for the man in front of you. You nodded, whispering, “Thank you.”
“And for the record,” he added, his lips brushing against your cheek, “I’ve known you for over 21 years. If anything, we moved too slow.” His voice was full of affection, teasing but entirely sincere.
You couldn’t help but laugh, the sound bubbling out of you as he took your hand and started dragging you toward the door. “Too slow?” you teased. “Says the guy who took years to tell me he was in love with me?”
“Exactly!” he quipped, shooting you a grin over his shoulder. “We’re making up for lost time now. Let’s go, sweetheart.”
----
The bar buzzed with life, the usual chatter and music filling the air, but for you, it was bittersweet. Sam was leaving in less than 36 hours, and it felt like the beginning of the end of an era. You walked in with Bucky, his hand resting at the small of your back, a comforting presence amid the unease brewing in your chest.
The booth was full when you arrived. Sam was at the center, his wide grin lighting up the space, while Wanda and Natasha sat on either side of him. Steve leaned back in his usual corner spot, sipping from a beer and keeping his gaze fixed on the table.
“There they are!” Sam bellowed, his face lighting up as he spotted you. He made his way over, pulling you into a tight hug. “My favorite troublemakers. Took you long enough.”
“Traffic,” Bucky deadpanned, earning a snort from Sam.
You laughed, shaking your head, “Nice to see you too Sam”, you gave him a quick hug before Bucky slide into the booth and pulling you in next to him.
“You okay?” Bucky murmured, his hand resting on your knee.
You nodded, though your grip on your glass tightened. “Yeah. Just nervous.”
The drinks came quickly, and the group settled into a rhythm of laughter and conversation. But even as the jokes flew and stories from years of friendship resurfaced, the cracks in the group dynamic were impossible to ignore.
Steve barely spoke, his smile strained. Natasha was quieter than usual, her eyes darting between you and Steve. You could feel Bucky watching you, his hand squeezing your thigh under the table as if to ground you.
After a while, Sam cleared his throat, his usual lightheartedness giving way to something more serious. “Alright, listen up,” he said, setting down his glass. “I leave in like 34 hours, and I can’t have my family falling apart before I’m even gone.”
The table fell silent, all eyes on him.
Sam turned to Wanda. “You’re coming with me to the bar to get another round. Shots, wings, whatever looks good.”
Wanda blinked but stood, grabbing her purse. “Alright, let’s go, Wilson.”
Before leaving, Sam pointed at the rest of you. “Nat, you need to talk to Y/N. Steve, you’re talking to Bucky. I mean it—figure your shit out before I get back. I need all my children to be okay before I leave, or I’ll never be able to live with myself.”
Natasha scoffed, rolling her eyes. “You’re not that much older than us.”
“Emotionally? A lifetime,” Sam retorted, walking off with Wanda.
Your glance flicked to Natasha, who sat stiffly across the room, her expression unreadable. She caught your eye and sighed heavily before standing, jerking her head toward a quieter corner of the bar. “Let’s get this over with,” she muttered.
Your nerves tightened, but you nodded, following her to the edge of the dimly lit room. The ambient noise of laughter and conversation faded, leaving just the two of you. Natasha crossed her arms, her gaze fixed somewhere over your shoulder.
“So,” you started hesitantly, your voice quieter than you intended, “I guess we’re doing this.”
She sighed again, her shoulders sagging slightly. “Look, I’m sorry. For what I said. About you and Steve. About… everything.”
The apology caught you off guard, and for a moment, all you could do was stare at her. Natasha rarely apologized—she was the type to let actions speak louder than words. But here she was, standing awkwardly in front of you, making the effort.
“You really hurt me, Nat,” you said softly, the vulnerability in your voice surprising even yourself. “All I wanted was advice about Bucky, and you shut me down. And then you told me—”
“I know,” she interrupted, her tone sharper now. “I know what I said. I was angry and… jealous.”
The word hung in the air, heavy and unexpected. Natasha bit her lip, her eyes darting away from yours before she finally continued, her voice quieter. “I’ve been carrying this around for years, Y/N. Watching Steve love you when I…” She trailed off, taking a deep breath to steady herself. “When I didn’t know how to stop feeling the same way. It’s not your fault. I know that. But it doesn’t make it easier.”
The weight of her confession hit you hard, your chest tightening with guilt and sorrow. “Nat, I didn’t ask for this. I never wanted to hurt you—or Steve—or anyone.”
Her gaze snapped back to yours, her eyes full of conflicting emotions. “I know,” she said, her voice breaking slightly. “But it still happened. And I’m still figuring out how to deal with it.”
You hesitated before reaching out to touch her arm gently. “What do we do now? I don’t want to lose you.”
Natasha’s jaw worked as she fought to contain her emotions, her arms tightening across her chest before finally dropping to her sides. “I don’t think you ever could,” she admitted, her voice softer. “But I need some time. Time to figure out my shit without dragging you into it. And when I do… I’d be honored if you’d still want to be by my side.”
Relief and emotion surged through you, making your voice tremble as you said, “I’d love nothing more.”
Her lips curved into a small, tentative smile, the tension in her shoulders easing just slightly. “Good,” she said, her tone lighter now. “Now get over here. We haven’t hugged in a week, and I’m starting to feel myself deteriorating.”
You laughed, the sound breaking the tension like a fresh breeze. “God forbid,” you teased, stepping forward and wrapping your arms around her tightly.
Natasha held on just as firmly, her hand squeezing your shoulder. “We’re gonna be okay, right?” she said, her voice quieter, steadier. “It’ll just take time.”
You pulled back just enough to meet her eyes. “We will. Promise.”
She nodded, brushing a strand of hair out of her face before gesturing toward the rest of the group. “Now come on, before Sam makes us cry in front of everyone with his goodbye speech.”
You laughed again, wiping at the corner of your eye. “Too late for that.”
--
Steve nursed his beer, his grip tightening slightly around the bottle as Bucky turned to him. “So,” Bucky began, his tone steady but probing, “wanna tell me what’s been eating at you?”
Steve glanced at him, his jaw working. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Bucky raised an eyebrow, tilting his head like he wasn’t buying it. “Come on, man. I’m not blind. You’ve been acting off all night. Just say it.”
Steve sighed heavily, leaning back against the booth. He ran a hand through his hair, his expression tired. “Fine. I ran into Y/N earlier this week,” he admitted, his voice low. “And yeah, I said some things. I know you already know what I said, Buck.”
Bucky’s shoulders stiffened, but he kept his voice calm and measured. “Enlighten me.”
Steve gave him a reluctant glance, his guilt obvious. “I told her she shouldn’t be with you.”
Bucky’s jaw tightened at the words, a flash of irritation crossing his face, but he said nothing, waiting for Steve to continue.
“And that she should be with me,” Steve added, his tone almost a whisper. “I was out of line, Buck. I knew the second the words left my mouth that I shouldn’t have said them. You’ve always been her guy. Always. I don’t know what the hell’s been wrong with me these last few months. I guess I’ve been holding onto something that was never mine to begin with.”
The tension between them was palpable. Steve looked down, taking a deep breath. “I’m sorry, man. You’ve been my best friend since forever, and I let my own shit get in the way of that. That’s not fair to you, or her.”
Bucky studied him for a long moment, his expression unreadable. Finally, he nodded, his voice soft but firm. “Apology accepted.”
Steve looked up, relief flickering in his eyes. He took a sip of his beer, leaning back with a small, self-deprecating laugh. “You’re good for each other, Buck. Always have been. Don’t do anything stupid..”
Bucky’s lips twitched into a faint smile, the tension between them easing slightly. “Not planning to.”
Just then, you appeared at the edge of the table, your smile hesitant. “Hi,” you said softly.
Bucky’s attention shifted to you instantly, his eyes softening. “You okay?”
You nodded. “I was wondering if I could talk to Stevie for a minute. Alone, is that okay?”
Bucky hesitated for a moment, glancing between the two of you, but then he stood, giving you a reassuring smile. “I’ll go make sure Sam’s not getting just hot wings again. God forbid we try anything else,” he joked lightly, pressing a soft kiss to your cheek before walking toward the bar where Sam, Natasha, and Wanda were gathered.
As soon as he was gone, you slid into the seat across from Steve, your hands fidgeting on the table. You opened your mouth to speak, then closed it again, trying to find the right words.
Steve chuckled, though there was little humor in it. “I must’ve really messed up if I made you speechless.”
You gave him a faint smile, but your expression was serious. “You did,” you admitted. “But I’m not here to rehash all of that. I’m here because… I don’t want this to ruin everything.”
Steve’s brow furrowed, his guilt clear in his eyes. “Y/N, I—”
“Let me finish,” you interrupted gently. “What you said… it hurt. It made me question everything for a second, but then I realized something. You’ve been my friend, my rock, for so long, Steve. And I don’t want to lose that. I don’t want to lose you.”
Steve looked down, his fingers tapping against the table. “I don’t want to lose you either,” he said softly. “I just—God, I don’t know what’s wrong with me. Seeing you happy with Bucky… it’s like I’m happy for you, but there’s this selfish part of me that keeps thinking, ‘What if?’ And I hate that part of me.”
You reached across the table, resting your hand over his. “Steve, I never wanted to hurt you. But you have to let this go. Bucky is my person. He always has been. But you? You’re my family. That’s never going to change.”
Steve nodded slowly, his lips pressing into a thin line. “I’ll get there,” he said quietly. “It’s just going to take me some time.”
You squeezed his hand. “Take all the time you need. Just… don’t shut me out, okay?”
His lips twitched into a small smile. “Deal.”
The two of you sat in silence for a moment, the tension easing slightly. Then Steve smirked faintly, his usual humor slipping back into his tone. “Guess I should be thanking Buck for taking you off my hands. You’ve been a handful since we were kids.”
You laughed, rolling your eyes. “And you’ve been a pain in my ass just as long.”
Across the bar, Bucky caught your eye and raised his glass in a small, questioning gesture. You smiled and gave him a thumbs-up, letting him know everything was okay.
Steve followed your gaze, his smile softening. “He’s a good guy,” he said. “You two are going to be fine.”
You nodded. “Yeah. We will be.”
Steve raised his beer. “To new beginnings?”
You clinked your glass of cider against his. “To new beginnings.”
As the conversation lightened, Bucky returned to the table, sliding in beside you and resting a protective arm around your shoulders. “Everything good?”
Steve nodded, his smile genuine this time. “Yeah. Everything’s good.”
When Sam returned, the tension had eased slightly, but the cracks in the group still lingered, waiting to be mended. Sam clapped a hand on Steve’s shoulder, as everyone slid in the booth his grin wide. “Well? Did we fix it?”
“We did,” Bucky smiled and nodded at Steve as they clinked their beers together.
Sam raised his beer. “To figuring our shit out. And to the best damn family I could ask for.”
Everyone raised their glasses, the moment bittersweet. Sam’s departure loomed, but for now, you were all together, trying to rebuild the bonds that had frayed.
The bar was buzzing with energy, the kind of Friday night chaos that made everything feel alive. You were crammed into the usual booth with Bucky by your side, his arm casually draped over your shoulders, and everyone else filling the space with laughter and noise. Sam sat at the center, soaking in the moment with his trademark grin. Tonight was about him, and for once, he seemed content to be the focus.
“Alright, who’s up for darts?” Sam said, holding up a set of darts he’d grabbed from the bar. “One last chance to embarrass yourselves before I leave.”
“I’m in,” Natasha said immediately, sliding out of the booth. “And don’t think for a second I’ll go easy on you just because you’re leaving.”
“You’ve never gone easy on me,” Sam shot back. “Which is why I’ll be kicking your ass tonight.”
Wanda stood, rolling her eyes playfully. “Let me get in on this. I need to show you amateurs how it’s done.”
Bucky nudged you. “You playing?”
You shook your head with a laugh. “I’m good. I’d rather watch everyone else embarrass themselves.”
Steve stood too, grabbing the last spot on the roster. “Someone has to keep it respectable,” he said, smirking.
The game started off friendly enough, with plenty of jeers and laughter as the group took turns missing shots or landing impossibly good ones. But as the rounds went on and the drinks flowed, the competitive edge started to sharpen. Natasha and Sam were neck-and-neck, with Wanda trailing just behind, and Steve hovering somewhere in the middle.
“Alright, final round,” Sam declared, his eyes gleaming. “Winner takes all.”
Natasha narrowed her eyes, gripping her dart like a weapon. “Prepare to lose, Wilson.”
Sam threw his first dart and landed a bullseye, throwing his hands up in triumph. “What did I say? Perfect form.”
Natasha rolled her shoulders, stepping up to the line. Her first dart landed just outside the bullseye, and her second was a near miss. By the time her third dart went wild, Sam was grinning like he’d already won.
“Choke city!” he crowed, earning groans and laughter from the group.
Natasha’s face twisted in mock frustration. “You’re insufferable.”
As Wanda stepped up for her turn, Steve leaned against the table, watching with mild amusement. “You okay over there, Nat?” he teased.
Natasha shot him a glare. “Don’t push it, Rogers.”
The game ended with Sam winning, of course, and his victory lap consisted of strutting around the bar while everyone booed and threw napkins at him. “You’re all just jealous,” he said, basking in the attention.
It was all fun and games until someone brought up another round. A casual remark about who owed drinks spiraled into an argument about who always skipped out on paying the tab. Natasha and Steve exchanged sharp words, and Sam and Bucky started debating who was the real cheapskate of the group.
“Steve never tips the bartender enough!” Natasha snapped.
“That’s because I don’t order a new drink every five minutes like you do!” Steve fired back.
“Oh, like you’ve never milked a single beer all night,” Sam added, smirking.
“Hey!” Steve pointed a finger at Sam. “Don’t drag me into this.”
“You’re already in it!” Bucky laughed, his voice loud over the commotion. “And for the record, Nat, you still owe me from last time.”
“You owe me!” Natasha shot back, her voice raising.
“What about me?” Wanda interjected, arms crossed. “I’m pretty sure I’ve covered half your tabs this year.”
It was ridiculous, juvenile, and completely in character for all of you. But then Natasha said something snarky about Bucky always forgetting his wallet, and you couldn’t help but jump in to defend him. That spiraled into a chaotic mess of voices, everyone shouting over each other until Sam finally let out a piercing whistle.
“Enough!” he yelled, silencing the table. He looked at each of you, shaking his head. “You know what I’m gonna miss the most about this group? How absolutely dysfunctional you all are.”
The tension broke with laughter, the argument dissolving as quickly as it had started. Wanda grabbed a tray of shots from a passing waiter, setting them down in the middle of the table. “Alright, truce,” she declared. “Everyone, grab one.”
You all raised your glasses, and Sam grinned, holding his high. “To this crazy, messy family. I love you all, even when you drive me nuts.”
“To Sam,” you all echoed, clinking glasses and throwing back the shots.
The rest of the night passed in a blur of laughter and nostalgia. As the bar began to thin out, the reality of Sam leaving started to sink in. One by one, everyone said their goodbyes.
Natasha hugged him tight, whispering something in his ear that made him smile. Wanda promised to visit, and Steve gave him a long, firm handshake that spoke volumes.
When it was your turn, you wrapped your arms around him, holding him a little longer than usual. “I’m so proud of you, Sam,” you said, your voice thick with emotion. “But I’m gonna miss you.”
“I’ll miss you too,” he said, squeezing you back. “But don’t worry. You’re stuck with me. I’ll be back before you know it.”
Bucky clapped him on the back, pulling him into a quick hug. “Don’t be a stranger, Wilson. And don’t forget—next time you’re in town, darts rematch. I’m taking you down.”
Sam grinned. “You wish, Barnes.”
As Sam walked out of the bar for the last time as a local, the group lingered by the door, watching him go.
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mydearestbeloved · 1 month ago
Text
Chapter 13 [Draft]
Sung Jinwoo/Trial Player!Reader
CW:
Inspired by @circeyoru ‘s “Future Power Couple”
[Masterlist🦋✨️]
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The day you met her was vivid in your memory, even after all these years.
It was two years after you had set foot in Seoul, still trying to adjust to life after practically being a recluse for five or so years. Though you’d like to think that you were already pretty well-settled into your rhythm.
Your flower shop had grown from a modest corner tucked away into a beloved staple for locals—a sanctuary of blooming life amidst the bustling city. Most days brought a steady flow of regulars, some looking for gifts, others seeking solace among the vibrant petals.
On a quiet weekday afternoon, just as you were finishing a delicate arrangement of daffodils, the bell above the shop’s entrance chimed.
The sound was nothing out of the ordinary, but something about the presence that entered your shop that day was different.
Your eyes flickered up to find a teenage girl hesitantly stepping inside as if she were intruding. She was probably around eighteen years old, her figure lean, dressed in a worn red tracksuit, a black mask covering half of her face, and a baseball pulled low over her brow. She appeared more like someone ready for a jog than a customer browsing for flowers.
Despite her attempt to blend in, there was something distinctly youthful about her—a sense of innocence and naiveté that stood out, an air of unpolished grace—something that drew your attention even before you saw her fully.
You observed her quietly from behind a high rack of ferns and succulents as she lingered near the doorway, her gaze sweeping over the cascading vines and rows of colorful blooms before wandering tentatively through the butterfly-filled aisles.
Blond hair tied in a ponytail sway as she moved. Her beauty was fresh and striking, though something else was itching at the back of your mind—her bright grey eyes seemed to glow with a subdued curiosity as they darted around the shop.
Every few steps, she paused to smell the fragrant blooms, a small smile tugging at her lips as if savoring a rare moment of peace. You had seen countless customers react similarly, but there was something about her that stirred a faint sense of recognition in you.
It wasn’t until she pulled down her mask to take a deeper breath, her eyes widened with an unmistakable expression of relief, that you realized who she was.
Cha Hae-In.
Or at least, a younger, less hardened version of the woman introduced as a rising star from the beginning of the story.
The Hae-In you knew from Solo Leveling was a force to be reckoned with, an S-Rank Hunter who would one day capture the heart of the world’s strongest man. But this girl in your shop, dressed in a red tracksuit with her face half-hidden, was just that—a girl. She hadn’t yet become the indomitable swordswoman who would one day stand by Jinwoo’s side.
You stepped out from behind your plants, offering her a soft greeting. “Welcome to Perennial Atelier. Can I help you find something today?”
She turned at the sound of your voice, her gaze locking onto you with an expression that shifted quickly from polite interest to something more… surprised. Almost shocked.
She stared at you for a moment, before her expression softened, though her mouth opened, then closed, before she finally murmured, a hint of confusion in her tone, “You... you don’t have a smell.”
“Pardon?” You asked, though the recognition was already dawning on you.
Realizing what she had just said, her face turned beet red. “I-I’m sorry!” She began to stutter, hands flitting frantically as if to physically pull back her words. “I didn’t mean to—that came out wrong! I just...” She paused, taking a deep breath, trying to collect herself. “I mean, um, it’s just that… I usually pick up on, uh, people's scents, but you… don’t have one at all.”
You listened quietly as she tried to explain herself, her words coming out too quickly, too jumbled. But you understood.
You remained calm, though inwardly, her words set off alarms. This must have been related to her heightened sense of smell. Her olfactory sensitivity, a trait that allowed her to smell mana, able to distinguish every hunter’s strength and presence by scent alone, where most she found foul. It was also what first drew her to Jinwoo, the first person she found bearable because his scent was different, almost pleasant to her.
But with you… she said there was no scent at all.
Though before you could dwell too long on the mystery, something cliché happened.
One of your many children, a silver one you named ‘Trick’, decided to pop into existence right in front of Hae-In’s face, nose-to-nose.
The poor girl let out a small yelp, stumbling backward, her shoulder colliding with a steel shelf.
The shelf creaked, and a potted plant teetered dangerously near the top. Her hands flew up as the potted plant began to tumble toward her.
Reflexes kicked in. You summoned your scepter in its sleekest form, and lunged forward, all the while positioning yourself between Hae-In and the falling plant, just in case. The thin blade slashed through the air, and the ceramic shattered harmlessly to the ground, split neatly in two.
Fortunately for you, the soil didn’t make too much of a mess. The unlucky plant also still hummed, faintly, its life thrumming just below your skin.
Hae-In blinked up at you in stunned silence as you held out a hand. You were close enough to see the slight tremble in her eyes.
“Are you alright, Miss?” You asked, concern coloring your tone, keeping her eyes on you as you discreetly wave off your weapon.
Professionalism came first. Wouldn’t want to scare off your costumers, right? Even if this customer would one day become an admirable warrior.
Her face flushed an even deeper shade of red, whether from embarrassment or awe, you couldn’t quite tell. “Y-Yes! Thank you…”
“Sorry for you causing trouble!”
Hae-in, mortified, had insisted on paying for the broken pot and plant, voice filled with earnestness, apologizing profusely. You held her hands in yours before she could gather the scattered broken pieces.
"Oh, not at all. In fact, it was my fault. This shelf has been unstable for a while now.” You said lightly as you waved her offer of compensation off. “Think of it as a good reminder for me to get new shelves. I appreciate your help with that.”
The encounter left a spark. Cha Hae-In became a regular visitor after that, dropping by the shop almost daily, each time with the same blend of subdued curiosity, excitement, and shyness.
Most of the times, she would linger, chatting awkwardly at first, then more comfortably as the days passed. There was sincerity, a softness to her that was endearing, and you found yourself subconsciously looking forward to her visits.
It became clear that this place, and perhaps your company, offered her a rare reprieve. You didn’t miss the way her eyes softened each time she entered, relieved by the lack of foul scents around her. Her unique ability, you could only imagine how difficult it must be for her to make friends, to connect with others in general—yet here, in your shop, she found solace.
Befriending her now felt like stepping into a space that wasn’t meant for you. But when she looked at you with that earnest gaze, so full of hope and longing, you couldn’t turn her away.
Despite the risks of forming such a bond with someone who would eventually be tied so closely to Jinwoo, that loneliness of hers was one that echoed your own. An outsider in this world, a stranger playing a role—
Cha Hae-In was the first person to breach that solitude.
At first, she seemed to come up with excuses to drop by, asking for small bouquets or browsing the potted herbs, likely out of guilt for taking up your time. But eventually, you took the initiative, gently letting her know that she was welcome to visit anytime, with or without making a purchase.
The shyly joyful smile she gave you was enough to melt the remaining reservations you had.
And apparently, she was too adorable for you at this stage that it triggered your cute aggression. That was how you found your hands cupping her face, squeezing and pinching her cheeks, her hands flailing about in the air, more flustered than ever since that day she first met you.
Thus, a routine was born.
Each day, like clockwork, she would step into your shop after school or on her days off just to chat, filling the air with her eager energy. She was still clumsy with her words sometimes, but the honesty that was rare to find never left, and her shoulders less tense. At times, you would invite her to your afternoon tea, talking about everything and nothing, while at other times, she would help you tend to the plants. You guided her hands when she fumbled with the watering can or pruning shears, her eyes lighting up whenever she managed to do something right.
It was infectious. Her joy a balm to the quiet ache you carried.
The shop, usually filled with the soft flutter of your butterflies and the gentle rustle of leaves, became livelier with her presence. Trick seemed to take a particular shine to her, often tickling Hae-In with her wings by being the nearest to the teenager’s face. Hae-in would sometimes sit on the stone-covered ground, playing with Trick and your other children, their delicate feet settling on her form. Hae-In’s laugh became a sound you grew fond of.
Even though you chided her every time she sat on the stone floor without a matt, dirtying her clothes with dirt and the occasional wild grass in the process, she would look up at you with that pleading expression, and you relented every time.
Hae-In would then turn to grin at Trick, and despite her not understanding exactly what that child of yours was saying, Hae-in seemed able to piece bit by bit what the mischief-butterfly was conveying by observing the flutter of wings and flight patterns.
At this point, you honestly don’t know if it was a blessing or a curse.
One day, as you were pruning a row of gladiolus, out of the blue, she asked you, “(Name), you’re a Hunter, right?”
You paused, uncertain where the question would lead, but nodded nonetheless. Her eyes seemed to sparkle, and before you could even process it, she had both of your hands clasped in hers.
“Please, teach me how to fight!” she blurted out, her face inches from yours, filled with a hopeful determination that was impossible to ignore.
You almost wanted to laugh, though you were touched by her eagerness, you masked your hesitation pretty well if you said so yourself.
This was Cha Hae-In, Jinwoo’s future partner. Training her, influencing her growth, could have unintended consequences. In the original story, Cha Hae-In had trained under someone else. But looking into her earnest eyes, so filled with the desire to become stronger, to help people, you couldn’t bring yourself to refuse. In the end, you agreed, though with a caveat.
“I can teach you the basics,” you said, “Let’s see what suits you first.”
And so, you became her mentor—or well, her half-time mentor. She was a diligent student, showing up on time for every session and practicing tirelessly even after you were done for the day. In the weeks that followed, her natural aptitude for swordsmanship came to light, just as you predicted.
“Here. If you truly want to master swordsmanship, there’s a dojo run by a skilled kumdo teacher —a swordsman named Song Chi-Yul. I’ve only heard good things about him.” After all, you were first and foremost a healer slash mage, but there was no need for Hae-In to know that. Sure, you became a jack of all trades to survive the trial stage, but that came second to your specialty: long-range and control over magic. A mainly supportive role.
If Hae-In wanted to augment her strikes with mana however, you would gladly be her magic teacher, which you did after a while of her refining her sword skills under Song Chi-Yul’s tutelage.
The fierce resolve in her eyes reminded you a lot of a certain protagonist.
Years passed, and by the time Cha Hae-In turned 22, she officially became Korea’s 9th S-Rank Hunter. You couldn’t help but feel a swell of pride, both as her magic mentor and her closest friend. She had grown into the formidable warrior she was meant to be, and though you knew she would have reached this point even without your help, it was still gratifying to see her bloom.
Even with her newfound fame and responsibilities, Hae-In still made time to visit your shop, albeit less frequently. Her smile, as always, never fail to brighten your day every time she came by.
Now, standing in your shop once again, she looked every bit the strong, confident young woman she had become. Perhaps today was one of those rare days off she had.
“How have you been, Hae-In?” you asked, a warm smile gracing your lips as Trick fluttered excitedly around her.
“I’m good!” she replied, practically bouncing on her toes. “I just had to come by and see you. It’s been too long!” The tickling sensation on her cheeks made her giggle, “And I miss you too, Little Guy!” You watched, amused, as Hae-In reached out to stroke Trick’s wings after that child fluttered down to land on her shoulder
You listened with a fond smile as she chattered on about the recent missions she went on and all the little things that had happened since she last visited, sparing no detail.
Despite the changes and the years that had passed, some things, it seemed, would always stay the same.
As the sun dipped below the horizon, casting your shop in a warm, golden glow—
As your shop gradually closed for the day, the two of you lingered in the dimming light, the soft scent of flowers hanging in the air—
You suppressed the small pang in your heart.
Soon, Jinwoo’s path would cross with hers.
---
The ice cream parlor was cozy: pastel-colored walls, little round tables with cushioned chairs, and the sweet, irresistible aroma of freshly made waffle cones lingering in the air, tucked away on a quiet street, a haven from the chaos of Seoul. It had become your go-to spot whenever you and Hae-In found a spare moment to relax, away from your respective worlds—hers filled with the rigorous training and responsibilities of a rising Hunter, and yours with the quiet rhythms of tending to your flower shop. The soft hum of conversation, the gentle clinking of spoons against glass cups, and the faint scent of vanilla that filled the air made it a perfect place to unwind.
Today, the two of you sat by the window, where the afternoon sunlight filtered through the glass, casting warm golden hues across the table. A small cup of vanilla ice cream sat half-melted in front of you, while Hae-In opted for her usual, a decadent swirl of dark chocolate and mint. The gentle glow illuminated her flushed cheeks as she stirred her ice cream absentmindedly, lost in thought.
You had barely taken a bite of your dessert when she suddenly broke the silence. "I met an interesting person today," she said, her voice almost thoughtful, as if she was still mulling over the encounter. It was an unusual tone for her—Hae-In was usually direct and straightforward, never one to mince her words.
And she rarely described people as "interesting"; most of the time, she kept her interactions simple. Whoever she was about to talk about had made quite an impression on her for sure.
“Oh? Do tell,” You tilted your head, curiosity piqued. “Who was it this time? Another persistent admirer?” you teased lightly.
Hae-In shook her head, a small, exasperated smile playing on her lips. “No, nothing like that. It was a Hunter working with the mining team,” she began, taking a delicate spoonful of her ice cream. “He... didn’t smell bad.”
So she’s already met Jinwoo. The pieces were falling into place.
The thought sent a strange pang through your chest, though you couldn't quite pinpoint why. Was it relief that the story you knew was unfolding as it should?
Ah right, it was natural, this familiar pang in your chest. You felt this before, and you were not alone in doing so. Like a fan knowing that they couldn’t touch their idols. A reader that couldn’t cross the boundaries between their beloved characters through the pages. Your circumstances might be an exception, but it will be too reckless to charge in blindly. There was a reason why there was a line between fantasy and reality. Too many unknown consequences to really breach these boundaries were put exactly to ensure that it stayed.
You pushed the thought away and focused on her words.
“At first,” she continued, her eyes narrowing slightly as if she were reliving the moment, “I thought it was just because he was an E-Rank.” She stilled, “I didn’t mean that in a bad way! You know, umm… their mana is usually too little to produce that overwhelming foul scent.”
“There’s something about him, though,” Hae-In added, leaning back in her chair. She stared down at her cup, stirring the ice cream slowly as if lost in her thoughts. “I had this nagging feeling that there was more to him than he let on.”
“More to him, how?”
“When I first saw him, I could have sworn he was holding weapons— Not something subtle either. Swords, or are they daggers? Like, right there in his hands.” She paused, frowning. “But as I got closer to talk to him, there was… nothing.”
You had to hold back a smile. Did Jinwoo almost get carried away again? The scenario matched perfectly with some of the incidents you’d read in the manhwa, where he’d nearly given himself away. It seemed some solitary habits were really hard for him to shake.
A small smile tugged at your lips. If you looked at it in another way, even now, it seemed like fate was nudging Jinwoo and Hae-In closer together.
"And his scent..." she added softly, almost as if she were confessing something. “It’s... bearable, almost... pleasant.”
“Oh my!” you said, placing a hand dramatically over your heart. “Did you fall in love at first sight?” You couldn’t resist the urge to tease her, letting out an exaggerated sniff as if you were on the verge of tears. “Our little Hae-In, all grown up and already falling for some mysterious Hunter.”
Hae-In’s reaction was immediate and priceless. Her eyes went wide, and a blush crept up her neck, flooding her cheeks and even the tips of her ears with color. “Hey! You’re only three years older than me!” she huffed, her voice rising an octave higher than usual. She leaned forward, jabbing her spoon in your direction as if she might swat you with it.
You leaned back with a laugh, dodging her mock attack. “I didn’t hear a denial~” you sing-songed, drawing out the last syllable in a playful lilt.
“Cut it out!” she grumbled, but there was no real heat behind her words. Her blush deepened, and in her flustered state, she reached out to swat your shoulder lightly, her movements more akin to a kitten batting at a string.
You couldn't help the laughter that bubbled up from your chest. The way she reacted was too endearing—like a shy teenager experiencing her first crush, though she herself might not even realize it yet. She kept lightly hitting your side, her pout growing more pronounced each time, but her lips twitched upward despite herself.
“All right, all right, I’ll stop teasing,” you said, raising your hands in mock surrender. “But in all seriousness, if he’s caught your attention, there’s probably something special about him. Your instincts are pretty sharp, after all.”
“Sometimes the people we meet by chance end up playing a bigger role in our lives than we expect.”
Hae-In’s expression softened at your words, the playful atmosphere giving way to something more thoughtful. “I don’t know,” she admitted, her voice quiet now. “There’s just… something about him. It’s like he’s trying to hide something, but I can’t figure out what.”
You watched her as she spoke, the way her brows furrowed slightly in concentration, her eyes growing distant as if she were replaying their meeting in her mind. If only you knew, Hae-In. Knowing her future with Jinwoo, it was almost surreal to witness this stage in their journey. Here she was, unknowingly at the beginning of what would one day become a bond so deep and unwavering. A part of you ached at the thought, but another part of you was grateful, too. Hae-In deserved to find someone like Jinwoo, someone who would cherish and understand her in ways few others could.
Lost in thought, you almost didn’t notice when Hae-In glanced up at you, her gaze curious. “Do you think… I should get to know him better?” she asked, her voice soft, almost hesitant.
You smiled, reaching across the table to pat her hand gently. “I think you should trust yourself. If there’s something about him that makes you feel drawn to him, there’s probably a reason for it. Don’t ignore that feeling.”
Hae-In looked at you, her eyes searching yours for a moment, as if trying to decipher something deeper in your words. Then, she smiled—a soft, genuine smile that reached her eyes.
Eventually, she broke the silence, her expression a little more playful. “You know, you’re awfully wise for someone who pretends to be so clueless.”
You let out a mock gasp. “Pretend? Me? I’m hurt, Hae-In,” you said, feigning offense as you placed a hand dramatically over your heart. “I’m just a humble florist with a penchant for giving sage advice.”
She rolled her eyes, but there was a warmth in her gaze as she looked at you. “Thank you, though,” she said softly. “I… I don’t know if I would have had the courage to follow my instincts without you reminding me. You’ve always… made things feel less confusing.”
With a gentle smile, you squeezed her hand once before pulling back. “Anytime, Hae-In.”
For the rest of the afternoon, the conversation shifted back to lighter topics, the two of you exchanging stories and laughter over melting ice cream. Sitting here with Hae-In, watching her cheeks glow with that familiar blush, you allowed yourself to live in the moment, savoring the peace of this ordinary day.
---
Jinwoo’s grip tightened on his dagger as he assessed the battlefield, eyes darting from one side to the other. The dungeon was shrouded in shadows and the stench of blood, the ground littered with remnants of the high orcs that Kargalgan commanded. This one’s different, he thought grimly. Kargalgan was leagues above the other two bosses he had encountered in the Demon Castle. Metus, the skeletal lich, was capable of commanding thousands of undead, but his defenses had been weak—easily punctured by Jinwoo's relentless assault. Kargalgan, however, was a completely different beast. His defenses were formidable, coupled with a mastery over powerful, wide-area spells that sent shockwaves rippling through the air with every cast.
What made it worse was the damn trick Kargalgan pulled—expanding his size, making himself appear as a hulking, monstrous giant. The moment he grew, towering over the battlefield, Jinwoo's grip on his weapons had tightened, a flicker of unease crossing his eyes. Memories clawed their way up from the depths of his mind—memories of the stone statues in that cursed double dungeon, back when he was barely capable of keeping up with the others. The echo of that terror, the raw, primal fear as those towering figures moved and he’d been utterly helpless against them. His breath hitched, but he forced it down, shoving the fear away.
Yet, there was another memory that followed, a more recent one that left a bitter aftertaste in his mouth. Vulcan. The morbidly obese bastard whose massive club had struck down his soldiers. The same battle where he had seen you, for the first time, bleed.
Jinwoo's mood soured as the images flashed through his mind. The bitterness lingered, like a dark cloud over his focus. He pushed those thoughts away as best as he could, his MP dangerously low. He needed to concentrate on the battle at hand.
When his mana finally hit zero, Jinwoo cursed under his breath, feeling a slight edge of desperation creeping in. But his hand found the small, smooth crystal from his inventory. It was one of the leftover mana crystals you had crafted for him after that snowland of a dungeon. He had been saving it, reluctant to use the precious item except in dire situations. But now, with Kargalgan rampaging before him, there was no better time.
The warmth of the crystal against his skin was immediate, a gentle heat that spread through his cold, battle-weary hands. Huh, Jinwoo thought absently, rubbing his thumb over the smooth surface. The sensation was oddly comforting, reminded him that time back in that hellish land again, your hand on his, unfazed by the demon’s blood as it coated both of your palms.
Your hand had felt even warmer than this crystal, and softer. His heart gave an odd, unsteady beat.
Jinwoo blinked, realizing where his thoughts had wandered. Focus, he mentally chastised himself, shaking his head. He crushed the crystal in his grip, feeling the satisfying crackle as it disintegrated, releasing a burst of mana. The air around him filled with a delicate flurry of butterflies, each one shimmering with the faintest glow of magic as they fluttered outward. They spread through the battlefield like a gentle breeze, healing his injured shadows and replenishing his mana in a surge. The rush was intoxicating, bringing a fresh burst of energy to his limbs.
His eyes trailed after the butterflies, lingering for a moment on the remnants of the crushed crystal in his hand. There were only a few left now. Jinwoo knew he couldn’t afford to be reckless with them. It would be wasteful to use them on anything less than an emergency, but now that the situation called for it, he felt a twinge of regret for having held back for so long.
I should thank her properly later, he thought. Maybe even take her out for that dinner I keep promising myself I’ll treat her to.
A slight smile tugged at his lips, but he quickly sobered as he turned back to the battle. In the chaos, with Kargalgan roaring and his spells crackling in the air, Jinwoo found himself thinking of you again.
He analyzed the shaman’s moves with a new sense of clarity. Kalgalan’s spells were powerful, his defenses near impenetrable, and his control over his minions formidable. But for all his strength, Jinwoo couldn’t help but see the similarities between Kalgalan’s approach and yours—the way he wielded his spells with practiced precision, the same controlled energy you used when in battle. Yet the more Jinwoo compared, the more he saw how the orc shaman fell short.
The ability to switch between offense, defense, and support on the fly.
He lacks your versatility.
The moment a magician loses their guards, they were nothing but a sitting duck.
---
Cha Hae-In watched from the sidelines, her heart racing as she observed Hunter Sung Jinwoo’s every move. She had expected something, certainly—word was spreading fast about the oddities surrounding Hunter Sung Jinwoo. But what she saw now went far beyond what she had imagined. His movements were fluid, precise, quick, each one calculated and relentless. This was not the skill set of a mere E-rank, nor even a typical high-rank. Hunter.Jinwoo moved like a phantom on the battlefield, his shadows surging and swarming. How many are there?
But what truly took her breath away was what happened next. Just as his shadows began to falter, and the B-team members appeared at the brink of collapse, Jinwoo did something completely unexpected. She saw him crush something in his hand, and suddenly, a distinct, soothing warmth filled the air. Cha Hae-In’s eyes widened further as she felt it—a familiar energy, subtle yet unmistakable, like a gentle breeze on a summer day. The members of the B-team, who had been on the verge of collapse, suddenly stood a little straighter, their wounds mending before her very eyes. Even the team’s healer, who had been nearly depleted, looked around in bewilderment.
Where have I felt this warmth before?
Hae-In’s brows furrowed as she tried to place the source of that warmth. It was distinct, different from Hunter Sung Jinwoo’s mana—something softer, more comforting.
The sensation nagged at her mind, tugging her back to memories of visits to your flower shop, of the quiet strength and warmth you exuded, of the unique aura that seemed to flow around you like an unseen embrace. Could it be…? No, she thought, feeling her heart skip. That’s impossible… isn’t it?
---
Jinwoo was still basking in the satisfaction of a hard-won battle when he felt a faint twinge of awareness—someone watching him. With a slight twist of his head, he saw Chief Woo Jin-Chul and, standing beside him, Hunter Cha Hae-In, both watching him with wide eyes.
Shit, did I get too caught up in the fight again?
"You did."
Jinwoo nearly jumped when your chiding voice echoed in his ear, though it came not from his surroundings but from one of the butterflies that had perched itself on his shoulder. He cast a quick glance around, noting that no one else seemed to be aware of the conversation between you two. Your butterflies were cloaked, visible only to him, their magic attuned solely to his presence. Jinwoo chuckled to himself, a sheepish grin spreading across his face as he murmured back to you.
“Yeah, yeah, I know,” he muttered under his breath, barely loud enough for the butterfly to catch. “Guess I still have a few things to learn, huh?”
---
Cha Hae-In watched from the sidelines, her heart racing as the last remnants of Jinwoo’s magic faded. The echoes of your advice from the previous day rang in her mind, filling her with a hesitant determination. "Why don’t you try talking to him again?"
Still, she took a steadying breath, her mind made up. She was going to speak to him. She took a step forward, parting her lips to call his name—but before she could utter a single word, Jinwoo was already being ushered away by members of the association. She hesitated, hand half-raised, her heart pounding as she watched him go.
And then, life seemed determined to make her embarrassment complete. One of the B-team mages nudged her, raising an eyebrow at the pickaxe still clutched tightly in her hand. She looked down, realization dawning slowly as mortification blossomed on her face. Oh no. The pickaxe. She hadn’t even thought to drop it. She had come all this way, heart pounding, ready to face him—and all while holding a pickaxe.
What am I doing?! she screamed internally, feeling the blood rush to her face as she hastily tried to shove the tool out of sight. Help me, (Name)! Her thoughts went into a frenzy. I messed up so badly!
---
Far away, in your flower shop, a butterfly delicately landed on your shoulder. You listened to the faint echoes of Hae-In’s jittery mental plea, a small smile playing on your lips. “Looks like I’ll have to check on her soon,” you mused to yourself. As you resumed tending to your flowers, your thoughts were already turning to the ways you could tease her about this little mishap over your next ice cream date.
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End Note:
Unfinished Draft of [13/11/2024] -
Did I make Cha Hae'in too... jittery?
108 notes · View notes
matchalovertrait · 3 months ago
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Me??????
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Thank you to everyone who tagged me for the simblr appreciation 💗 That was @bouncytrait, @elderwisp, @catsinmugs, @bloomingkyras, @woohoojuicesimoleons2,
@spotlessssmiind, and @smulie :)
I am so happy you thought of me and I love your blogs too!!
I’d like to tag everyone, but I can’t do that. However, I can acknowledge all of you whose posts I come across every day! I make sure to hit the like button to let you know that there’s someone here waiting for your next post. If I haven’t been liking recent posts, it’s because I’m reading your story from the beginning. I’m an awfully slow reader, so my apologies. I like to take my time and not rush through the stories to ensure I understand everything and take in all the small details.
Also, I know it can be easy to become disillusioned on here but trust me, there are a lot of incredible people. I see them every day on my dash.
I’ll mention some of my friends here who inspire me. Um, it's kinda long:
@changingplumbob: I don’t know how she balances so many projects at once and does it all with love! Each one of her characters is unique and steals the spotlight. When it comes to her posts, I'm either philosophizing or laughing. It's also admirable how much research she puts into the stories she writes. You can definitely tell!
@deardiaryts4: I love people who do extra things for their sims just like me LOL. She doesn’t have to make a music video or album cover CC. Nor does she have to create actual code for us to solve a mystery, but she does it anyway because she's passionate! She gives it 110% every time with her intriguing story and gameplay.
@ruthplaysthesims goes DEEEEPP into the lore! Blink and you'll miss it. She also has an impressive cast of characters. There are many mysteries in her stories that I am itching to have the answers to. I need to see/know!!!
@abbysimsfun OMG I absolutely love her style of writing, which became a recent influence over my own. She's also a fellow fan and user of Chekhov's guns (I know the name of that literary device now because of her hehehe. No, no actual guns here!). I am captivated by the storytelling!
@dreamyyesenia is so incredibly sweet! She also takes her sims' personalities and interests very seriously and creates the perfect homes/wardrobes for them. She's a master at it and I'm taking notes.
@authorspirit: Her builds are absolutely fantastic. Joy is a smart cookie and she does everything with precision. I really like the chic and regal aesthetic in her posts too. Quite demure
@sharona-sims is my slice-of-life queen!!!! She seems apologetic for the "slow pace" of her gameplay, but I don't mind it one bit. I could keep up with Lily and Michael for the rest of my life, idc, I love them.
@teadreamsims is immensely creative and a great storyteller. I always forget they play on console. That just shows how important imagination is. The gameplay with Fern and the rotational gameplay with the townies happened ages ago but they live in my head rentfree.
@aurorangen: Details details details!!!!! I eat it all up and Rory always gives us extra insight and behind-the-scenes stuff. She's talented in both writing and telling her stories through pictures. And her builds are insane.
@cakepoppresent: Nahhhhh cuz the drama and the wholesomeness, omg. I like how we explore different groups of characters at a time and it never seems like too much. And her videos are everything.
@miralure is on hiatus sadly :( But she definitely left her mark, I never forget her. When I came back to Simblr, I had no idea a lot of people saw commenting as an "embarrassing" thing? She was very welcoming and her mindset is the one I've been following ever since. Because of her, I'm often all up in your guys's comments like nothing lmao. Anyway, her lookbooks were perfection as well as her male sims. Amazing.
@windslar also seems to be on hiatus :( I admire the way she composes her dialogue posts through photos and I've been trying to do it as well as she does. The facial expressions, the angles, etc! It's cinematic.
@cinamun: I don't even have to explain, but I will anyway. The drama, the real-life-issues, the gifs, the heartfelt moments, the plot twists, the in-depth characters, the lore, the background, the wardrobes. Phenomenal work!
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treedaddymcpuffpuff · 8 months ago
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Excessive Force : Tom Ludlow x Fem Nurse Reader (COLLAB W/ THE INCREDIBLE @johnwickb1tsch) - Chapter One Two Three Four Five Six
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TW: violence, choking, mentions of bdsm, abuse of authority, cops, unfair power dynamics, harassment, body fluids and drug use mentions, mentions of harm/accidents
For California, it’s a bit chilly out this morning. The sun is getting a lazy late start, just beginning to yawn golden orange and fiery yellow over the horizon. Julian’s hair in that light is the high shine of fashion magazine model locs, and you’re, as usual, opening your mouth before you think. “What shampoo and conditioner do you use?”
He seems thoroughly amused. “Honestly? You’re going to be mad about it.” 
“Try me,” you prod, slipping inside his little sports car that smells like lemon air freshener and coffee. 
He seems a little cramped in the seat, knees bent up and head almost touching the ceiling, and you wonder if he actually even tried to get into this thing before buying it. 
“It’s a rental,” he explains.
“Did you get into an accident?”
“A truck hit mine while it was parked.” 
“How are you so calm about that? I’d punch someone.” 
He looks over at you with a sculpted, raised brow. “I just cannot imagine you hurting a fly, y/n.” 
“Flies are innocent, truck drivers are free game.” 
He gives you a big laugh that strokes the flame of your ego. “You’re hilarious. I use men’s body wash.” 
“What?” Okay, he’s right, you are a little mad. You use shampoo and conditioner that are specifically supposed to soften your hair, but the poof on your head absolutely pales in comparison to his soft, beautiful mane that gets the luxury of … what? Old spice? Axe body wash? 
“I told you,” he sings, turning on the engine. 
Genetics is a bitch. 
He takes you to a fancy little French inspired coffee shop cuddled into the center of an outlet mall with salt lamps and big ferns and comfy chairs. You settle into a nook closests to the sunned windows so Julian can keep an eye on his rental, which is understandable. No part of LA is good to have a Porsche in, but especially not the inner city. 
“This is delicious,” you tell him through a mouthful of warm croissant, covering your lips in embarrassment when you realize that your table manners are less than adequately prepared for a date with a doctor. 
“They have the best coffee,” he agrees, taking a sip of his steaming latte. 
You don’t have time to stop your brain from comparing Julian to a certain cop you know who prefers his coffee black and bitter, or at least that’s what he told you when he saw you drinking your vanilla cream cold foam at the nurse’s station. 
Julian is talking, you think, and you’re only half listening while you remember how Tom had snatched that drink right out of your hands and held it up in the air. 
“Give it back!” You hissed, reaching up on tiptoes while he laughed at the pathetic rescue attempt. 
“Careful, honey, don’t hurt yourself for this pathetic excuse of caffeine. What is it anyway? Is there even coffee in here?” 
After he walked away with his discharge paperwork, your coworkers were understandably curious about the tall, puckish cop who fucked with you any chance he got. 
Miguel watched his ass move the whole way down the hallway and out the glass exit doors while literally clutching the rosary under his scrub shirt as if a devil had just walked by, then looked over at you. “What a man.”
“Are you alright?” Julian asks, bringing you back to the present conversation with a hand over your forearm. He does seem concerned, and it makes you feel like a piece of shit. This guy is a gentleman and here you are on a date with him fantasizing about the brute that is Tom Ludlow. 
“Yeah, I’m fine.” You wave away his concern. “Tell me about you, Julian. What do you do for fun? Doctor-by-night, Violin-player-by-morning? 
He chuckles. “Nothing that cultured. I like riding motorcycles.”
“Really?” You ask, genuinely surprised and trying to imagine Julian in a gang of bikers with cracked leather skull and snake jackets. 
“I love them.” He nods. “I have three that I take for long rides along the coast. You get lost in it, the wind and salt and sand. The rumble of the engine under you.”
“I’ve never been on one,” you tell him, “and I’m honestly surprised you ride them after what we see in the ER. Don’t you remember that guy that had his calf hanging on by a tendon? Or that woman who had half her face missing?” 
“Yes, I do. But I go the speed limit and wear the proper gear. And I like the thrill.” 
It’s not just the casual t-shirt and worn jeans or the way the light halos his thick silk nest of hair or the roguish grin that makes you see Julian in an entirely new way, now. “You’re wild, Dr. Mercer.”
He licks spilled cream at the ridge of his coffee cup, rubs at the skin of your forearm with his fingers, and winks. You wonder what he would look like between your legs doing the same thing, except with your fingers gripping that luscious hair. 
“You should let me take you for a ride, sometime,” he suggests, and for a minute you forget you’re talking about motorcycles. 
“Oh, I don’t know, Julian.”
“C’mon.” He nudges your knee under the table and relaxes back into his seat, now reminding you too much of someone else you know. Same height, same hair color, same facial structure. 
Fuck. Really? 
“Good boyfriends take their girlfriends on long, romantic motorcycle rides.” 
“But you’re not my boyfriend.”
His smile droops a little bit and it makes you feel bad for being so illiterately ignorant. Well, you feel bad until he opens his mouth. “I am, though.”
He paints it playful, but it sounds a little bit pushy-bossy, even. “I don’t know about that, either, Julian.”
He tries a different angle. “You know, believe it or not, most women would consider me quite the catch.” 
You hope your face doesn’t betray the little bit of ick you get from him saying something so egotistical. “I don’t doubt it, and you deserve someone that can give you what you’re looking for.” 
“You think you can’t give me what I’m looking for?” He leans across the table in sudden intensity, and you balk at the notion. 
“No, I honestly don’t.”
“Why?”
You start to say something, but he cuts you off. “And, I really mean why? Why can’t you give me what I’m looking for? Enlighten me.” 
“I’m not-I have too much baggage.” You unconsciously lean away from his swelling intensity. 
“That’s a little vague.” He frowns. 
“I’m not normal, Julian. You seem like you would like normal women.” You cringe at the childish sentiment, but truly have no idea how to get the point across except for basically telling him that you’re a freak with a bad past and worse coping mechanisms. You eat slices of bread for dinner and drink out of the milk carton. Julian probably irons his shirts. This will not work. 
“You’re assuming I’m normal?”
“Yes. I guess I am.” You lean back and cross your arms over your chest. 
“Well, I’m not. In fact, I’ll prove it to you.” He takes out his wallet, pulls a laminated card from it, and slides it over the table to you. 
“What..” It’s a little red card framed in black with big bold letters on the front advertising a BDSM club in the heart of downtown Venice. “What is this?” 
“BDSM is bondage, domination-“
“I know what that is,” you interrupt. “I just meant.. You go here?”
“I do.” He nods and takes a drink. “I occasionally engage in scenes.”
You decide that you should coat your suddenly very dry mouth and drink a big gulp of your coffee. “Like with a dominatrix?”
He laughs at you, puts his head in his hand and shakes his head. “No. I prefer to be the dominant one.” 
You look at-really, really look at this man for the first time and honestly cannot imagine him taking that role. 
He must see the confusion on your face, because his laughter grows. “That’s the usual reaction I get.”
Curiosity killed the cat. Curiosity killed the-you know what, fuck it. 
“So, what do you do at the club?” 
“A typical play scene, you mean?” How in the hell he can be so casual and relaxed about this you’re not sure. Because you can already feel the cold sweat breaking along your shoulders and neck. 
“I guess? Yeah.”
“Well, ideally the woman is tied up in some fashion, and of course there’s a safe word, negotiated limits. Perhaps a punishment scenario with pain play. Are you okay?” 
He looks at your table-clutching, white knuckled hands, searches your face, giving you a genuine concerned expression that makes you wonder what actually is going on with you right now. You feel like you're on a tightrope over a ravine of crocodiles and Julian’s on the other end lazily sawing at the rope with dull scissors.
“I’m fine,” you say breathily, suddenly unable to meet his eyes. “Honestly, I’m not sure how I feel about all that.”
His gentle smile is nothing less than kind, though maybe also, a little disappointed. “I get that a lot too.”
“Is that…the only way you enjoy sex?” you ask quietly, leery of the blue-haired old lady just two tables away.
“No,” he seems happy to tell you. “Though it is…the way I enjoy sex most.”
You blink, digesting this with understandable trepidation. He’s basically telling you that it would be impossible to be in a relationship with him without dipping into this eventually. And you…? 
Are definitely intrigued, and you’re not really sure why.
“You said you have baggage,” Julien probes cautiously. You can feel him looking at you, but you’re not quite up to eye contact with him yet. You fix your gaze out the window. “Well, I do too. I haven’t had a perfect life. No one does, and I’m not interested in a perfect girlfriend. I like you, y/n.”
You feel your breath go out in an audible whoosh. It actually makes him smile-you feel it like rays of the sun. How can this man be so warm, and yet have such a dark side?
Well, maybe it’s not a dark side, you reason. Maybe it’s just…a thing he likes, and between consenting adults, what’s the harm?
“So…” You can’t help but think about how odd this is, discussing this in this coffee shop filled with mild-mannered caffeine addicts. What you really want to ask, is what happened to him that makes him like this kind of sexual play, but you know it would be too far, and you damn well don’t feel like talking about your own fucked up past. But there is something you do feel you have a right to know. “Is this something you want to do to me?” 
Again, he fixes you with that bad boy smirk that gives you chills and utterly ruins your panties. “Since the moment you stood up to me over that patient,” he admits. And maybe that should alarm you, that he wants to tie you up and hurt you for being defiant about something that deserved defiance. It does alarm you, but… It also… It sounds a little thrilling. “In fact-“
Julian and the rest of the world and even your own thoughts disappear when you meet a pair of familiar, sun tinted eyes out the window of the coffee shop. He’s grinning-when is he not grinning at you like he knows what it does to your helpless insides?-and licking his fingers, tearing off a yellow parking ticket to slap it under the windshield of Julian’s rental.
“Uh, Julian-“ 
“Just let me finish,” Julian insists. His bossy tone irritates you, but Tom brightens the mood by making a jerking off motion towards the doctor, and then winking at you. 
You can’t help but laugh. It’s honestly involuntary, the loud wheeze that tears from your chest and makes Julian look outside to see the yellow ticket shining under his wiper as Ludlow’s ass saunters away. 
You’re not sure what Julian’s plan is when he storms outside to catch Ludlow by the arm, but you’re definitely following ten strides behind to prevent his untimely death. 
“I’m parked legally.” His voice is a menacing growl instead of the smooth honey you’re used to, and yeah, maybe now you can see a little bit of that Dominant Persona he was talking about. 
“Not after 9AM,” Tom says, unbothered by Julian’s anger, still grinning like an idiot. 
“It’s eight-thirty,” Julian argues, tugging on Tom’s sleeve-that earns him a bent back arm and even the appearance of handcuffs. 
“Tom, stop it, fucking really?” 
“Sorry, honey, your boyfriend’s going to jail.” 
“For what?!” You and Julian both demand at once. 
“Putting his pristine fucking hands on what’s mine.” Tom tugs Julian up on his toes and clicks one handcuff into place. 
You hope he means his uniform, but you have a feeling he doesn’t. 
“That’s way too tight and you know it,” Julian grunts. 
“What, someone likes to dish it out but can’t take it? Don’t be a bitch,” Tom muses, grabbing Julian’s other arm and twisting it-not gently-behind his back. 
“Tom, you fucking dickhead.” 
He looks at you as he’s putting the other cuff on your date. “Oh, I’ll deal with you later.” His grin looks more like a snarl at this point, and you think that Julian could probably take some pretty good Dom pointers from Tom, because your heart is galloping and your clit is pulsing despite the absolute absurdity of the situation. Also-it's a miracle-your sassing mouth has snapped shut. 
After Officer Ludlow practically throws Dr. Mercer into the back of his Charger, slamming the door, he turns to you with a smirk and his thumb in his belt. Goddammit, if that fucking look doesn’t go straight to your lady parts.
“Tom…you cannot do this.” 
A tow truck has pulled up, and is in process of impounding the sweet little Porsche.
He steps up to you in those big black boots that make him a mile tall.
“You’d be surprised what I can and cannot do, sweetheart.”
“Please.” You hate how desperate you know you sound. 
He taps his chin. “Well, I do like the sound of that. But it would be a lot more convincing if you got on your knees and said it.”
“You asshole,” you seethe, even as you can feel the moisture pooling between your legs.
“That kinda language definitely isn’t going to get Doctor Bitch Boy out of my car.”
“What the fuck do you want then?” You know it was a stupid question the moment it flies from your mouth. He’s going to reply with something filthy, and demeaning, and-
“Have dinner with me.”
You’re going to need another tow truck just to get your jaw up off the ground. 
“You’re going to get in trouble for this,” you say. “This isn’t harassing a lowly broke-ass nurse. He is going to sue the shit out of you.”
Tom just snorts at that, unimpressed. “Did you know your friend likes to hang out at a BDSM club in Venice Beach? Whips and chains and shit? Bet this asshole has mommy issues from here to Pasadena. Come on, y/n, you don’t need that in your life.”
It almost sounds like he’s…worried about you?
Officer Ludlow has no idea how badly he’s misjudged you, now that he’s pissed you off. “Maybe I like it,” you snipe back, stretching up so you’re almost in his face. “Fact is, it’s none of your fucking business.”
Ludlow just narrows his eyes down at you, those dark orbs glinting like sharp obsidian. “Well, sorry, guess he’s not tying you up tonight, baby. He’s gotta cool down in the tank.”
He makes to go, but you reach out, not grabbing him, per se, but just touching his chest. He freezes, and you can practically feel him vibrating beneath your hand. With excitement, because he fucking lives for being an asshole, or…you hate to think you know the real answer.
His mitt of a hand covers yours, holding it just above his heart.
“Tom….” Caught up in this tension between you, you’re not even sure what you’re asking now. 
You expect him to say something dirty, or snide, but instead you swear that just for a moment, his gaze softens as he looks down at you. “Dinner?” he asks again, with a note of hope in his voice that is almost endearing, if he wasn’t being such a class A jerk.
“I can’t.”
His demeanor changes in less than a second, drawing up to his full height, his shoulders squared. He flicks down his sunglasses that were on his head, so you can no longer even see his eyes. His voice changes, drops an octave, something. The authority in it makes you shudder inside. “Wave to Dr. Bitch Boy, y/n, we’re going for a little ride.”
Before you can grab him, or do anything, really, Tom is behind the wheel, speeding off with a very pissed off Julian in the back seat.
Your heart drops to your feet as you are left standing there alone on the sidewalk without a ride, and completely at a loss as to what to do.
***
“I’m going to fucking sue you,” Julian grits, kicking the back of Tom’s seat for good measure. 
“Yeah, yeah, with your doctor money,” Tom grumbles, taking a big swig of coffee with one hand and steering recklessly with the other because it’s fun to watch that skinny fuck bounce around helplessly in the seat. 
“I’m not getting booked tonight, Officer Ludlow. I’m calling my fucking lawyer.”
“Sorry, Doctor Bitch, your Lawyer’s busy until tomorrow afternoon, didn’t you hear?”
“You son of a-“
Tom gasses the car over a big pothole and it sends Julian flying into the opposite door. It’s a sight he could almost get off to.
Julian, big goose egg swelling up on his temple, gets yanked out of the squad car and tossed on the shit smeared, needle peppered streets of South Central. “They probably need you here more than the hospital, Doctor. Have fun–”
“Wait! Fuck. I’m still cuffed for fuck’s sake!” Tom gives the little guy credit for being able to get up on his feet so fast with his hands behind his back and a probable minor concussion. “You can’t leave me here.”
Tom pauses with his hand on the lip of the hot car door, but only to memorize the sight of a sweat-stained, wild eyed, trembling distinguished doctor about to get his shit wrecked on the mean LA Streets. He’s guessing Julian’s never visited much outside of Hollywood, Venice, and Santa Monica, and the cute little horrified expression on his face is testament to that. 
Tom taps the hood of his car. “See ya, Doc.” 
“You know,” Julian says, “this isn’t going to stop me from seeing her, Tom.” 
Well, if he wants a fight. 
Tom slams the charger door, whips off his belt, backs Julian up until he falls on his ass into a steaming puddle of unknown origin, and loops the leather around his neck. 
He tugs him up by the belt, onto his toes, eliminating that fraction of height difference just so he can see the whites of this prick’s eyes. 
He doubles the wrap of the belt in his fist, and Julian sputters something unintelligible through a thick choke. 
“What’s wrong? Thought you liked this shit?” Tom pretends to wait for an answer that he prevents. “Oh, that’s right, you like being the one doing the choking. That gets your dick wet, huh? Beating on women?” 
He wants nothing more than to choke this fucker unconscious and leave him on the streets for the hepatitis rats to chew on his toes, and, fuck it, if he ends up passing out by the time Tom’s done saying his peace, then so be it. 
“You can see her all you want, asshole. Take her on as many dates as you like. But if I see one fuckin’ bruise on her-one red mark on that pretty skin-I’m gonna make the rest of your short life very fucking unpleasant. Comprende?” 
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Along for The Ride - Part 1
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Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5
Summary: Transported to Middle Earth, you must Join Thorin Oakenshield's Company as they travel to reclaim Erebor! OR: My take on the classic 'modern girl in Middle Earth' troupe. With this first installment, we are following the first movie of The Hobbit trilogy, and falling in love with Kili on the way! Slow burn with this one y'all, nothing spicy till the next work I'm afraid.
Tags: Kili / Reader, Reader-Insert, Slow Burn, Modern Character in Middle Earth, During The Hobbit, How Do I Tag, Canon-Typical Violence, Kíli Is a Little Shit (Tolkien), wrote this while I had covid, in like 4 days lol, implied soulmates, Dwarf Culture & Customs, Freeform, Holding Hands, Cuddling & Snuggling, Sleepy Cuddles, Protective Thorin Oakenshield Company Members, Dwalin & Thorin Oakenshield Friendship, Fluff and Humor, Domestic Fluff, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Where In Middle-Earth Is Gandalf?, Hair Braiding, Dwarf Courting, My First Tumblr Fic, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Fíli & Kíli & Thorin Live, Thorin Oakenshield Lives, Fíli Lives (Tolkien), Kíli Lives (Tolkien)
Word Count: 6,292
A/N: I was utterly appalled by the lack of Kili writers on here and Ao3. Y'all who write for Kili, I've been eating your crumbs like it's the shit (cause it is) for weeks, but one can't be sustained on crumbs alone so I've prepared a feast!! This is the first fic I've ever wanted to post, please be gentle. Comments, Likes, and Reblogs are loved and treasured!!
Tagging the amazing Kili writers I've been living off of for the past few weeks and who have inspired me so they might share in the feast as well lol go check out their stuff too: @mikathemonster, @cowboybeepboop, @littleenglishfangirl, @ethereal-inquisitor, @sweetpeakili
Photo credit: @immawriteyouthings
Divider credit: @cafekitsune
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You were having one of those days that made you want to run away from everything. Instead, you walked on the golf course behind your house after hours; no phone, no umbrella, no bag this time, just you. You had what you could fit from your hands in your jean pockets as you walked the grassy field. Something twinkled and caught your eye on the far side of the fairway, there was a sparkle in the ferns. You walked over and began looking through the underbrush. Your hand grazed a smooth stick with a mangled end that encased a gem. You picked it up hoping for a better look but were transported to another world instead!
You appeared in the new world holding the staff. You were standing beside an older fellow with a pointy hat and long grey beard. You looked around and saw many other gruff, burly-looking men sitting in an encampment. They looked as confused as you. You did the only thing you could think of doing at that moment.
You turned around and took off running as fast as you could.
The wizard whose staff you were running away with asked the younger dwarves in his company to fetch you for him. They ran after you as quick as the wind. You dodged trees and hurdled bushes, making an all-around great effort. You were slowing down though. You stopped for a moment to catch your breath and plan. A twig snapped in the distance; quick footsteps closed in on you. You took off again. You needed a place to hide, a moment to think for God's sake. You were afforded no such luxuries. They were gaining, you were tiring. In your drained haste, you tripped on a bush which sent you stumbling and struggling to regain your footing given your momentum. You finally fell and scampered to take cover behind the roots of a great tree. Their footfalls grew slower and drew nearer. They were so close you could hear their words now.
“…She’s hiding, Fili,” one said much closer than you expected them to be.
You tried your best to steady your breathing. Your heartbeat was so loud you knew they could hear it.
“Stop scaring her Kili,” The other chastised. “You know she’s got to be scared half to death”. He walked past you, studying the ground. The other came up the other side of the tree doing the same.
You gripped the staff preparing yourself to be found. They turned in unison following the same tracks and looked up at you simultaneously. They were both panting but not as hard as you. Fili, the elder and more experienced of the two knelt where he stood a few yards from your curled trembling form.
“My name is Fili” He put his hand on his chest and motioned to the man next to him, “This is my brother Kili. We mean no harm to you.” He kept his distance and showed his empty hands. You stayed firmly pressed against the tree trunk, your chest heaving rapidly and your eyes as large as saucers. They could have tackled you, beaten you, or done any number of terrible violating things, but they kept their distance and spoke softly.
“What’s your name?” Kili asked, with a charming smile as he crouched beside his brother.
“Y/N,” you said in a shaky freaked-out tone.
“Y/N, that’s our friend wizard’s staff,” Fili said, “If anyone can figure out how you got here, he can.”
“But you gotta come back to camp with us,” Kili said reaching out his hand as a peace offering. So many horrible things could happen to you in the wild of this new world, but even more on top of that could if you didn’t go with them.
“How can I trust you?” You asked them. They looked at each other.
“How can we trust you?” Kili threw back at you with a suspicious look and recoiled his hand.
“Touche” you nodded returning his look.
“Seems we are at an impasse then,” Fili huffed at his brother, “You want to get home, and our wizard can do that. The only way that can happen is if you come with us back to our camp. We can only offer you our word and promise on our honor as dwarven princes that you will not be harmed by any in our company.”
You thought for a moment and nibbled at your lip, “You promise?” you looked up at Kili this time.
Kili looked you deep in the eyes, and very seriously said: “No harm will ever come to you, on my honor as a prince.”
You nodded at this, “Very well”, and tried to stand up but were stuck against the tree. The 2 men easily lifted you back to your feet. You followed them back to the camp.
You tried your best to hide behind Kili as you approached the wizard smoking a pipe. You peeked from around his shoulder at the other men in the camp. They were looking at you.
“Please sit, my dear,” The wizard said to you, motioning to the rest of the long log beside him “We have much to discuss.”
Your legs wouldn’t move you from behind the dwarf. You were still quite afraid.
“She seems to have taken a liking to you Kili,” the wizard said to him. The rest of the company let out a soft chuckle of agreement. You couldn’t see it from your angle, but Kili smiled and nodded.
“Sit down child, we aren’t going to hurt you,” One of the dwarves sitting across the fire said. You took a deep breath to gather your courage. One false move by any of the others would have you bolting again.
You moved from behind Kili and sat beside the wizard still clutching the staff.
“May I take that from you?” the wizard politely asked. You handed it to him. He explained how this type of thing had happened to a couple of his wizard friends before, but he didn’t know the remedy or spell to undo it or how to prevent it from happening again. You sat quietly listening and nodding. He explained to you and the rest of the company that he was leaving to travel to his friend and inquire about your predicament. In the meantime, he convinced the company and its leader, Thorin you came to know, to keep you in the company as an innocent bystander to help around the camp and whatnot till Gandalf (the wizard) could figure out what to do with you. Gandalf gave you a small sack of coins, instructing you to get a bag, a bedroll, clothes, and any other necessities you’ll need at the next town.
As the fire died down so did the company. They got out their bedrolls and sleeping gear like a synchronized unit and as quickly as they started, they were all asleep snoring softly. Kili had first watch and was sitting on the ground next to you leaning against the log you were on. You slid onto the ground next to him curled with your knees to your chest. He looked over at you. You looked over at him.
“I don’t know what to do now,” you said not hiding the waver in your voice very well, “I’m so scared.” You couldn’t hold back the tears anymore. You cried into your hands as quietly as possible, so you didn’t disturb and anger the others. If you had looked at Kili, you would have seen him in a slight panic and at a loss for what to do, he didn’t know how to console crying women. You sobbed into your hands knowing you just needed to let it all out then you’d be fine. Kili looked at the fire and put his hand on your back. Physical contact of any kind back home was next to nonexistent, it felt nice to know he was trying his best to comfort you. After a few minutes of uncontrollable sobbing and hiccups wracking through you, you began calming down. When you were able to breathe properly, you wiped your face even though tears kept falling. You sniffled and rested your chin on your knees letting the tears fall silently now.
“Do you feel better?” Kili guessed in a soft tone and rubbed his hand on your back.
You nodded at him, “Yes” You took a deep breath and wiped the tears from your eyes as best you could, “Thank you” You looked at him and smiled a little. He smiled and nodded too, still concerned but returned his hand to his lap. You sniffled and looked at the fire.
“Really though I don’t know what I’m doing,” you said. “I’ve never been camping before,” you paused to think. “I don’t know how to fight or use a sword or make a fire or hunt or-or—” You were working yourself up and starting to cry again. Kili cut you off before you could start sobbing hysterically again.
“WOAH! Woah!!” alarmed, he put his hand on your back again, “It’s ok. Calm down.” he said harshly, “Take a deep breath, that seemed to help last time,” He mumbled the last part under his breath. That made you smile despite yourself.
“You don’t know how to console someone, do you?” You took a deep breath and wiped your eyes. He shook his head and took his hand from you. “Seems we’re both out of our depth then,” you said making the mood a bit lighter.
“In my defense, I was raised in a pack of manly men,” He smiled fondly “It’s a wonder my mother got through to me at all.”
“So, you do have a mother,” you said, making him look at you quizzically “I assumed you were raised by wolves,” You shrugged. He laughed and you couldn’t help but smile.
“You’re not completely wrong about that,” He smiled, looking over at the men across the fire. There was a momentary silence. “We’ll teach you those things, how to fight, how to make a fire, all that,” He looked over at you, “I mean who knows how long Gandalf will be, and you’d have to be pretty stupid not to pick up a thing or two even from this bunch.” You smiled and nodded; this calmed your nerves a little. A moment of silence fell between you again.
“Is it ok if I stay up with you?” you innocently asked, “I’m not very tired.”
“Sure,” he said casually, “May I ask about your life back in your world?”
“OK,” You nodded.
“What do you do?” he asked, you gave him a weird look. “Like for a living, how do you make money, how do you spend your days?”
“I’m a student at university at the moment.” He looked at you confused this time. “I spend my days studying at a desk, it’s boring and dull” You quickly summed up.
“Ooohh,” He said, “No wonder you couldn’t run for shit,” He laughed.
You scoffed, “So rude,” You huffed, failing to hide your smile. He was glad you were cheering up a bit.
“If it’s so boring and dull, why don’t you do something else?” He asked, naive to your world and its ways.
“It’s…complicated” you sighed “I have to study to do what I want to do for work even though I don’t want to work or study or do any of that, but I have to make money somehow because I need money to do stuff and buy things because the world I live in is shitty that way and it’s so frustrating sometimes,” you gritted your teeth to make your point.
“Well, what do you want to do then?” he asked, trying to understand your strange world.
“Sit on the beach,” You said without hesitation “…Listen to the waves…sleep on a blanket in the sun,” you sighed wistfully. “Die happy and rich.”
“That does sound nice” He agreed “I’ve never seen a tropical ocean before, the seas near the Blue Mountains are all frozen over.”
“Surely there’s a beach somewhere in this world,” You refused to believe the universe sent you to a world without a beach.
“There is! I’ve heard stories of Southern Gondor, where the sun makes the sand hotter than forges, and the water falls over the horizon in every direction.”
“That sounds like the beaches from back home,” You felt a little bad for him. You’d been practically raised at the beach because it was the only free thing to do in your hometown.
“May I ask a question?” you asked this time.
“Of course,” He shifted to lean against the log and face you.
“What are you guys doing?” you gestured to the camp around you.
“We are on a quest!” He said proudly, “A quest to take back our ancestral home from the dread dragon Smaug,” he said in a sinister voice. He explained about Erebor and the dragon and Thorin to catch you up. You listened, nodded, and took it all in, asking questions and giggling at his jokes. He was a decent storyteller.
“And I’m just along for the ride I guess,” you said deflated about your role in all this.
“If it’s any consolation, you’re quite good company,” He indulged; Kili always got so lonely on watch.
“Yay!” you said over a yawn, “I’d hate to bore any of you,” you replied, genuinely fearing your stories may never measure up to theirs. You leaned over and laid on the soft grass, curled in a ball with your arm as a pillow. You tried not to shiver from the cool evening breeze. You heard some shuffling of fabric, and then a blanket fluttered on top of you. You looked at Kili who smiled and said: “I’m quite the furnace at night, I’ll be fine without it,” he reassured.
“Thank you,” you said over another yawn. You didn’t expect to fall asleep but the next thing you knew it was early morning and you were awoken by the clanging of pots and spoons. You sat up and looked around to get your bearings.
‘Still in the same strange world’ you thought not fully awake. Kili appeared, greeted you good morning, and handed you a bowl of white goo he called porridge. You thanked him and ate your breakfast in silence like the rest of the company. While the men packed up the camp you were tasked with washing the dishes in a nearby stream. You were struck by the beauty of the incredible woods around you even in the dim morning light. You returned to camp and put the dishes in their bag, which was taken by one of your new companions. You felt out of place without a task among everyone who knew what to do. Balin saw you standing in the middle of the camp looking lost. He asked Thorin what they were to do about their lack of an extra pony for you. They decided you could ride with Kili seeing as he was the lightest (next to Bilbo) and his pony could take the weight and because you seemed the most comfortable with him. The old dwarf with a white-grey beard curled up at the ends approached you with as much of a nonthreatening air as he could muster.
“Good morning, my dear!” He greeted you with a chipper smile. “My name is Balin”
“Good morning,” you replied. “I don't quite know what I’m to be doing,” you said sheepishly.
“That’s ok lass, it’ll come with time,” he reassured, “For now, you’ll ride with Kili so you can see if he needs help getting ready.”
“Ok,” You nodded and started walking in Kili’s direction. You stopped in front of his pony and petted its nose and down its neck. “I’ve been told that I’m to ride with you,” you said timidly looking at him adjust his saddle. Kili looked at you and nodded.
“I’ll be happy to have a lovely conversation again” He smiled and looked back at his saddle, making the final arrangements.
He turned to you and said, “I’ll give you a leg up,” And jabbed a thumb at his pony. You nodded and approached the animal. You put your hands on the ponies back and bent your leg waiting for him to help. He leaned forward so he could whisper in your ear: “Wrong leg”. You blushed quite profusely at that and switched legs. He heaved you with such strength he nearly threw you over the other side of the pony. You made yourself comfortable behind the saddle before he hooked his foot in the stirrup and carefully mounted so he didn’t knock you off.
“You ok?” he asked over his shoulder.
“Yep!” you smiled. He nodded. You were excited to see new lands even though you feared what they harbored.
“If you need to hold on to me when we get going you can,” he said, making you both blush despite yourselves.
A few moments later Thorin called out: “Company ready?” in a deep booming voice, “Aye!” They all replied in unison. “Company, move out!” He bellowed and urged his pony forward. The rest followed behind him one by one. When your animal lurched forward you grabbed Kili's waist for dear life. The company was silent till they got to the end of the forest. You had your cheek pressed against Kili’s shoulder and your chest against his back. The fur of his coat was very soft against your face as you turned your head to look over his other shoulder. You yawned but didn’t realize you did it right next to his ear and breathed down his neck. He determinedly kept his eyes on the pony ahead of him to keep the blush rising in his chest at bay.
“You can take a nap if you need to,” he said over his shoulder in a soft voice for only you to hear.
“That sounds like a good idea,” You yawned again. You buried your face in the soft spare fabric of the hood on his back and cuddled closer to him to rest your head on his shoulder. You closed your eyes and sleep swiftly took you. He knew this because he could feel your breathing slow on the back of his neck. He was happy you could sleep and couldn’t help his smile. You shifted now and then, turning your head one way then a while later turning it the other. Kili tried not to talk or move too much in fear of waking your delicate slumber. By midday, you felt very well rested. You took a deep breath and released your grasp on Kili to stretch your arms above your head, arching your back to wake yourself up. You quickly slipped your arms around him again, so you didn’t fall.
“Good morning!” He chirped, “Well afternoon really,” he corrected with a smile, “Sleep well?”
“Mhm,” You hummed against his shoulder “I haven’t slept that well in a long time,” you said thinking back on the restless weeks before your arrival in Middle Earth.
“Good,” He nodded. “Happy I could be of service.”
“Yes, you make quite the comfortable bed,” you replied.
An easy silence settled between you for a while. You contentedly watched the landscape pass by while he kept the pony on the path.
“What’s a good weapon for a beginner?” You asked knowing you needed to start wrapping your head around the fact that you could be stuck here forever and needed to protect yourself. He thought about that for a few moments.
“I’d have to say a bow,” He shrugged, “I don’t know honestly, lemme ask Fili,” he kicked up his pony to walk faster to be next to his brother. “What is the best weapon for a beginner?” He asked him. Fili glanced at you and thought for a moment.
“Hmm I think a sword would be easiest,” He replied, contradicting his brother.
“A sword?!” Kili said incredulously “No that’s one of the harder ones,” He swatted his hand as if to swipe the words from the air.
Fili scoffed “For you maybe,” he said barely keeping his teasing smile under control “But not to the rest of us, my weapon-challenged brother.” That made you giggle. Kili huffed and pulled his horse back, so he wasn’t beside his brother anymore.
“Are you that bad with a sword?” you asked, trying not to laugh too much.
“No!” he exclaimed, “I’m just better with a bow and arrows,” he pouted.
‘Awe he’s so cute when he pouts’ Your thought took you by surprise.
“Perhaps you can teach me, Archer,” Your voice was lower than you intended, making you both blush. Your breath ghosted over his ear making him shiver just a little. He turned his head to look at you over his shoulder, his face so close to yours. He looked at your lips then deep into your eyes holding eye contact.
“Maybe I will,” he said in a deep gruff whisper that made you gasp and goosebumps rush over your skin. He turned back and smiled; proud he could get a rise out of you. You huffed and distanced yourself from him by leaning back, needing the space to calm down.
As night drew closer, Thorin led the company to the edge of a forest and found a shallow cave, more like a cliff overhang to make camp for the night. He told Fili and Kili to take care of the ponies and Oin and Gloin to make the fire. After the meals had been handed out Thorin told you to take Fili and Kili a bowl. You walked through the forest and found them looking at a downed tree in panicked awe.
“Something took 4 of the ponies,” Fili said to you, hoping you’d have the answer to their predicament.
“Yes, and…” you nodded at them trying not to panic yourself “What are you going to do about it since it’s your problem?”
The brothers decided to see what took the ponies and if they could handle it themselves, no need to worry Thorin, right? You followed them as they tracked the pony-nappers. Kili hid behind a tree and peeked around, you hid behind him and peeked over his shoulder. 3 large trolls were something to worry about, and a sight that made that dreadful feeling drop from your chest into your stomach. Your grip on Kili’s coat tightened.
He turned to you and said in barely a whisper, “Go back to camp and tell Thorin”.
Fili was immediately against it, huffing and puffing from behind his tree. Kili shrugged and motioned with hands as if to say, ‘What else would you have us do?!’ Fili huffed again and snuck around the tree. He tried to cut the rope fence with his sword, but he took too long. The trolls caught him. They were deciding ways to eat him when Kili looked at you in alarm and told you to go back to camp. You ran as fast as you could.
“Ponies! Big grey troll things took the ponies!” You said out of breath pointing the way you just came “Fili…in…danger”. Thorin cursed in dwarfish and rallied the company. Balin told you to keep your distance, so you didn’t get caught in the fight.
The dwarves fought bravely but were captured. Bilbo bid for more time while you thought of a plan. You heard the trolls complain about daylight coming and that gave you an idea. You saw the trolls had made camp in the shade cast by a large boulder. You wedged a branch under the rock and used the leverage to try to roll it. It was very heavy, and you were not. It took everything in your power to push the branch to roll the boulder down the ditch edge it rested on. The trolls were washed in sunlight, turning them to stone and freeing the company. They cheered when you stepped over the branch and into the clearing. You helped them from their confines and smiled and blushed when they praised your good job.
Back at camp the company gathered their things and discussed what to do now. Fili suddenly hushed the company.
“Warg howls in the distance,” He whispered to Thorin “They are coming!”
“RUN!” Thorin yelled at the company. Following Thorin everyone started running. You all ran as fast as you could onto a hilly plane sprinkled with trees and boulders. You ran and ran till the Wargs finally caught up. They began to encircle you. The company fought the beasts, taking them down as still more came at them. You went to hide behind the rock formation but fell into it instead. You climbed out as the Wargs were closing in.
“Down here!” you called “There’s a passage this way!” you slid down to make room for the others. Thorin was the last one, as he slid down a horn was blown near the entrance to the passage.
“I can’t see where it leads, do we follow?” One of the dwarves asked.
“Yes! We follow!” Thorin barged through the dwarves and led the company through the narrow pass. You all walked for a few minutes, but then Thorin rounded a corner and slowed as he realized where he’d unwittingly led the company. The rest kept walking around him, but Bilbo stopped and said in admiration: “Rivendell”. You stopped as well to take in the view before you. It was the most beautiful thing you had ever seen. A small town on the side of a mountain with water flowing from beneath some of the glittering structures.
As Thorin led the company over a bridge, you grabbed Kili’s arm to steady yourself as you looked around and took in the ornate statues and architecture of the front steps of a large building. A man much taller than you or the dwarves approached the group.
“We would like to speak to Lord Elrond,” Thorin said through gritted teeth. He was swallowing his pride for the betterment of the quest, that much was clear through his clenched fists and tense shoulders.
“Lord Elrond isn’t here,” The elf said regretfully.
“Then where is he?” Thorin’s patience was growing thin. A horn was sounded on the other side of the bridge you’d just crossed. Everyone turned to see a group of horses galloping towards them. The dwarves began shouting in dwarfish and closing ranks with their weapons ready for battle. You were pushed into the very center of the circle as tall horses and riders circled you. They stopped suddenly and the one on a black horse dismounted.
“My Lord Elrond,” The elf who first approached you said with a bow.
“Lindir” Elrond bowed his head at him then turned to the leader of your group, “Welcome Thorin son of Thrain,” He looked over the dwarf “You have your grandfather's bearings.”
“I’m afraid I know you only from the stories my grandfather told me,” Thorin was doing his best to be polite. (You were later informed that the stories were mostly about him being a ninny.)
“I’d like to offer you and your company a taste of our elfish hospitality,” Elrond said with a warm smile.
“Does that mean we’ll eat?!” Bombur called from the back. The company chuckled at him.
“Yes Bombur, that means we’ll eat” Dori replied. The company cheered at the prospect of a full belly and a warm hearth.
Not long after, you were sat next to Bilbo and Kili at a large table. The salad appetizers were very good despite the dwarves not liking green food very much. You giggled at their jokes about how bad the music was or how they wanted chips and meat. Thorin was sat at another table across from Elrond discussing something you couldn’t hear, but you could tell it pained Thorin to be in the other man's presence.
You turned to Kili beside you. “Thorin looks constipated,” you said in a low voice barely containing your laughter “He can’t even pretend to be enjoying this”. Kili looked over at his uncle and laughed with you.
When the meals were served there was boisterous laughter and general dwarfish shenanigans, the usual at any merry dwarfish gathering. Bilbo looked like he was having PTSD from when they were doing the same at his house at the beginning of the quest. At the end of the meal, Thorin and Balin disappeared with Elrond to discuss a map. You asked Kili if he would escort you to the markets with as much innocent girlish need as you could muster to solidify your security. He agreed and walked with you through the corridors and to the market. He helped you get a fair price on a bag, a blanket, and a bedroll. The next thing you needed was clothes to blend in.
“What do the women around here wear exactly?” You asked him. He shrugged.
“It depends, I guess” He had his hands shoved in his pockets as he followed you around the clothing stalls like a puppy.
“Gee, that’s a big help.” You teased.
After some more wandering you found a stall selling clothes that looked your size. You purchased a dark blue form-fitting tunic that stopped above your knees and had slits on the sides that went up to your hips. It paired very nicely with the brown pants and brown coat with dark blue highlights you bought as well. Kili helped barter with the merchants since you didn’t know the fair price of things here. In another section of the market, you bought spools of black, blue, and pink thread. You put your belongings in your new bag.
“Are we done?” Kili asked, sounding slightly annoyed. He was ready to go back to the others and be away from so many elves. You sighed and rolled your eyes playfully and nodded. He led you through the busy crowded markets by holding your hand. You were thankful he was in front of you so he couldn’t see your blush. You made it back to the group, who had set up camp in a courtyard garden at the end of a hallway. Just as you arrived two female and two male elves came down the hallway.
One of the males stepped forward, “The bathhouse is ready for you now” he said to the group.
“Bath?! We don’t need no stinkin’ bath!” Exclaimed a dwarf from behind the fire. The rest heartily agreed, not ready to drop their pants on elvish soil it seemed.
“I’d like a bath” you timidly said, not wanting to make a fuss but very much wanting to be clean.
“Very good mistress dwarf, if you’ll follow us,” one of the female elves said. You were tense as you followed the four elves down the corridor, not sure what you were doing.
“You best go with her lad,” Dori said to Kili, “You never know what an elf might try to pull.” He glared at the back of the elves as they walked away. Kili nodded and ran after you.
“Y/N!” He called making you and the elves stop.
“Oh, change your mind, Kili?” You asked with an innocent smile, happy to have his company.
“Yeah, I guess so.” He smiled too.
You were led to a large door that opened into a covered hot spring that flowed over the balcony to create an assumably gorgeous waterfall. Columns lined the outer edge of the room which was split down the middle by a cloth partition. The male elves walked to one side of the divider with Kili in tow, while the females walked to the other. The elves asked that you wash under the heated shower of water off to the side before entering the hot springs. They left you to your own devices.
“I’ve never seen anything like this have you?” You asked Kili across the large room.
“No” He smiled at the wonder in your voice from seeing new things and making discoveries. He thought it was very cute.
You placed your bag and new clothes on the vanity in the corner. You undressed and stepped under the warm shower. You used the bar of soap you found to wash your hair and body. It was the best-smelling soap you’d ever had the pleasure of experiencing.
“Hey, Kee?” You hollered.
“Yeah?” He yelled back.
“Do you plan on keeping your soap?”
“No…Why?”
“I’ll take it then. I’ll need extra anyway,” And you were so happy you did. That soap made your hair silky smooth and stronger than ever. You rinsed the suds away then stepped into the hot springs.
It felt luxurious. You couldn’t help but moan a little as the heat pulled every knot and tense muscle from you. Relaxed, you floated in the steamy water.
“You still there Kili?” you asked suddenly nervous he’d left you.
“Yeah, I’m here” He replied, “We shouldn’t take too much longer though, Thorin could be back any minute and who knows what kind of a mood he’ll be in.”
That made you enjoy the bath a little faster. Not long after you began drying off and getting dressed. You took the hairbrush and beads and other miscellaneous hair trinkets that were on the vanity. You looked in the mirror at your new outfit. It fit as you thought, though a little snugger in some places than others, hugging your curves to allow for movement yet still baggy for breathability and insulation. Overall, a nice ensemble.
“Ready Y/N?” Kili asked from across the partition.
“Yeah, you can come over, I’m just packing my things.” You replied, folding your old clothes, and putting them in your bag with the rest of your things.
“Here’s the soap” He handed it to you.
“Thanks!” You smiled at him; you simply wrote his flushed cheeks off to the hot water. When you stood, he was able to get a much better look at you in your new clothes.
“A perfect fit I see” He smiled, looking you up and down. He couldn’t help but imagine what you’d look like wearing nothing but his tunic. A line of thought he blushed at and quickly willed away.
“Does it look alright? I don’t know how it’s supposed to fit” You fussed with the hems and the folds trying to make them lay better. He grabbed your hand to make you stop fidgeting.
“You look great,” he said with a genuine smile. You smiled and nodded your appreciation.
You walked back to camp, making moneyless bets on what mood Thorin would be in when he returned.
As you approached Fili saw you in your new outfit and said, “Well look at this…” Making the rest of the company look at you too, “Our wee lass looks like a bona fide middle earther now!” They cheered at your near-complete indoctrination.
“Now she just needs to learn how to fight like one.” Bofur quipped from beside the fire.
“Then I wouldn’t need any of you to protect me!” You put the back of your hand to your forehead feigning a damsel in distress, making the company laugh. You sat on the ground beside the long chair Kili was now examining his weapons in and leaned against it. You held out a stone fish figurine to him.
“As a thank you for helping me” you cleared your throat “…And for being my friend.” You couldn’t meet his eyes, but you knew he was smiling a little around his reed pipe. He took it from your open hands. You know it wasn’t much but it’s all you could offer.
“Maybe one day you can return it to the ocean,” you said, referring to your previous conversation.
“Maybe I will,” he smiled down at you with genuine fondness.
“Bombur!” Bofur called before throwing a sausage to his cousin. The table, which took skilled elfin craftsman months, even years to craft and carve out of solid wood, collapsed under the massive weight of Bombur. Everyone erupted in laughter, it was nice to be part of the group and share in the merriment.
~~
Thorin stopped Balin on their way back to the camp, “We should leave her here,” He said, “She is a liability.”
Balin had a terrible sinking feeling in his round tummy when he thought of splitting you up.
“So what if she is, Thorin?” Balin said near pleading. “Have you ever seen your nephew that happy or open with a girl that quick before? I’ve never seen the lad so engaged in a conversation that didn’t have to do with weapons before last night. So what if she dies on our quest, at least we gave them a chance to happen, and if fate finds their pairing favorable it will all work out!” Balin was desperate to keep you and the young prince together if only to keep the sinking feeling at bay.
Thorin huffed, “Very well, but her blood is not on my hands,” He walked away and into the camp.
~~
Thorin and Balin returned, and the tone became slightly more serious—slightly. The company settled and laid their bedrolls in the grassy parts of the garden. You laid yours out as well and prepped for sleep by removing your shoes and coat. The night was warm enough that your blanket would suffice. You looked up at the stars wondering if any of the constellations were the same as back home. You cuddled your coat to your chest relishing the feel of the soft fabric. The low conversation between Fili and Kili, while they sat on watch across the fire, lulled you to sleep.
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Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5
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roosterforme · 1 year ago
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roosterforme's '80s Rocktober Playlist fic challenge
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For those about to rock, we salute you!
Let's rock 'n' roll the Top Gun way! Choose an '80s rock song (or pop or country or rap...), and write a fic about one or more of our favorite Top Gun characters! Just make sure the songs are from Rooster's favorite decade, the 1980s!
Or create a banner or mood board! Go with an '80s vibe or a specific song to inspire you and run wild.
Banner credit to @mak-32. Rock on, Mak.
Rules for fics:
Please use the #top gun rocktober hashtag!!!
Once you have your song selected (first come, first served, no duplicates), please send me an ask letting me know which song and character(s) you want to write about. If your song is not listed below, just let me know what you want with your ask and I’ll add it (as long as it fits the decade). If your song has been claimed already, I'll let you know so you can choose another one.
You can use the song in the fic however you would like. Use it as the title, use some lyrics, have the song playing in the background, use it as inspiration, anything you want!
There is no real time limit, but please try to post in September or October.
Please make sure you tag me (or send me a message) when you post your story so I don’t miss it. I can’t wait to read and reblog!
Please reblog and share this with anyone who may want to participate. And reblogging fics is always a treat for writers!
If you’re under 18, do not submit or read smut.
Rules for banners and mood boards:
Please use the #top gun rocktober hashtag!!!
If you want to use a specific song, please send me an ask letting me know which song. If you want to participate with the '80s vibe and no specific song, just send me an ask and let me know you'll be submitting an image or images.
Please make sure you tag me (or send me a message) when you post so I don’t miss it. I can’t wait to reblog!
Please reblog and share this with anyone who may want to participate.
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Songs and fics we are rocking out to:
1 @roosterforme What's Your Name by New Order (Bradley)
2 @beyondthesefourwalls Time After Time by Cyndi Lauper (Bradley)
3 @sylviebell Faithfully by Journey (Natasha)
4 @wkndwlff Love Walks In by Van Halen (Bob)
5 @desert-fern Jump by Van Halen (Bradley)
6 @yanna-banana Like a Prayer by Madonna (Jake)
7 @fanboyswhore9 Addicted to Love by Robert Palmer (Mickey)
8 @cherrycola27 Born to Be My Baby by Bon Jovi (Bradley)
9 @trickphotography2 Start Me Up by The Rolling Stones (Bradley)
10 @blue-aconite Every Little Thing She Does is Magic by The Police (Jake)
11 @roosterforme Do You Wanna Touch Me? by Joan Jett (Bradley)
12 @startrekfangirl2233 Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go by Wham! (Mickey)
13 @bradshawsbitch Hungry Eyes by Eric Carmen (Bradley)
14 @bellaireland1981 Can't Fight This Feeling by REO Speedwagon (Bradley)
15 @wkndwlff Lay Your Hands On Me by Bon Jovi (Bob)
16 @beyondthesefourwalls Jessie's Girl by Rick Springfield (Javy)
17 @thedroneranger Boys of Summer by Don Henley (Bradley)
18 @cottagecori Dancing With Myself by Generation X (Bob)
19 @sweetwhispersofchaos I Hate Myself For Loving You by Joan Jett (Natasha and Jake)
20 @sometimesanalice Straight Up by Paula Abdul (Bradley)
21 @lovinglyeternal Call Me by Blondie (Jake)
22 @roosterforme Adult Education by Hall & Oates (Jake)
23 @beyondthesefourwalls Your Love by Outfield (Bradley)
24 @mayhemmanaged You Shook Me All Night Long by AC/DC (Jake)
25 @topherwrites Love Shack by The B-52's (Bradley)
26 @ficsilike-reblogged Take On Me by A-ha (Bob)
27 @cottagecori Rock You Like a Hurricane by Scorpions (Bradley)
28 @jupitercomet Kissing a Fool by George Michael (Bradley)
29 @startrekfangirl2233 Don't You (Forget About Me) by Simple Minds (Jake and Bradley)
30 @topherwrites Just Like Heaven by The Cure (Jake)
31 @sweetwhispersofchaos As the World Falls Down by David Bowie (Natasha and Bob)
32 @inmyloveworld Open Arms by Journey (Bradley)
33 @thedroneranger Centerfold by J. Geils Band (Jake)
34 @gretagerwigsmuse Can't Hardly Wait by The Replacements (Bradley)
35 @bellaireland1981 Love is a Battlefield by Pat Benatar (Jake)
36 @blurredcolour Push It by Salt-N-Pepa (Jake and Bradley)
37 @blackwidownat2814 White Wedding by Billy Idol (Jake)
38 @keep-on-burnin The Look by Roxette (Bradley)
39 @cherrycola27 Secret Lovers by Atlantic Starr (Natasha and Javy)
40 @topherwrites Uptown Girl by Billy Joel (Bradley)
41 @jynxmirage If I Could Turn Back Time by Cher (Jake)
42 @notroosterbradshaw Edge of Seventeen by Stevie Nicks (Bradley)
43 @ficsilike-reblogged Hungry for Heaven by Dio (Beau)
44 @callsign-magnolia Who's Crying Now by Journey (Bradley)
45 @trickphotography2 Every Breath You Take by The Police (Bob)
46 @sarahsmi13s��Pour Some Sugar on Me by Def Leppard (Jake)
47 @roosterforme Cover Girl by New Kids on the Block (Natasha)
48 @bobfloydsbabe Alone by Heart (Jake)
49 @ughthisisntright The Stroke by Billy Squier (Bradley)
50 @wkndwlff Special Secret Song Inside by The Red Hot Chili Peppers (Jake)
51 @sylviebell Thriller by Michael Jackson (Natasha and Javy)
52 @xoxabs88xox Why’d You Come in Here Lookin' Like That by Dolly Parton (Jake)
53 @paigewinchester67 I'm On Fire by Bruce Springsteen (Bradley and Jake)
54 @sarahsmi13s Fishin' In the Dark by Nitty Gritty Dirt Band (Bob)
55 @callsign-joyride Need You Tonight by INXS (Bradley)
56 @foreverrandomwritings Paradise City by Guns N' Roses (Beau)
57 @cherrycola27 Whoever's In New England by Reba McEntire (Bob)
58 @1234-angelika The Bluest Eyes in Texas by Restless Heart (Jake)
59 @decantedenchanted Right Here Waiting by Richard Marx (Mav)
60 @the-authoress-writes Black Velvet by Alannah Myles (Jake)
61 @withahappyrefrain Somebody to Love by Queen (Bradley)
62 @valhallaas Hold on Loosely by 38 Special (Javy)
63 @talktomegooseman The Chair by George Strait (Jake)
64 @foreverrandomwritings Master of Puppets by Metallica (Mickey and Bob)
65 @poetrieshouse Hungry Like the Wolf by Duran Duran (Mav)
66 @tongue-like-a-razor Poison by Alice Cooper (Jake)
67 @1234-angelika Real Love by Dolly Parton and Kenny Rogers (Bradley)
68 @the-authoress-writes The Flame by Cheap Trick (Ice)
69 @hangmanstigerlily Can't Fight This Feeling by REO Speedwagon (Jake)
70 @samsgoddess Hysteria by Def Leppard (Bradley)
71 @eternalsams Cherry Pie by Warrant (Jake)
72 @love-in-light Livin' on a Prayer by Bon Jovi (Bradley)
73 @thatdammchickennugget Summer of '69 by Bryan Adams (Bradley)
74 @whatislovevavy Everybody Wants to Rule the World by Tears for Fears (Jake)
Totally rad cover art:
@ryebecca She Drives Me Crazy by Fine Young Cannibals
@bettycooper Running Up That Hill (A Deal With God) by Kate Bush (Bradley)
@ryebecca The Power of Love by Huey Lewis and the News (Bob)
@mak-32 Get Outta My Dreams, Get Into My Car by Billy Ocean (Bradley)
@laracrofted I Love Rock 'n' Roll by Joan Jett (Bob)
@sebsxphia Come On Eileen by Dexys Midnight Runners (Bob)
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Need some song inspiration? Check out these bangers:
Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic - The Police
Start Me Up - The Rolling Stones 
Livin’ On A Prayer - Bon Jovi 
Eye of the Tiger - Survivor
Shout - Tears for Fears
You Give Love A Bad Name - Bon Jovi 
Every Breath You Take - The Police 
The Final Countdown - Europe
Angel - Aerosmith
Edge of Seventeen - Stevie Nicks
Uptown Girl - Billy Joel
Call Me - Blondie
Take Me Home Tonight - Eddie Money 
Free Fallin’ - Tom Petty 
Hysteria - Def Leppard 
I Hate Myself for Loving You - Joan Jett & the Blackhearts 
Just like Heaven - The Cure 
I Won’t Back Down - Tom Petty 
Magic - The Cars
Love Is A Battlefield - Pat Benatar 
Addicted To Love - Robert Palmer
Love Shack - The B-52’s 
Without You - Motley Crue 
Material Girl - Madonna
Legs - ZZ Top
Paradise City - Guns N’ Roses 
Can’t Fight This Feeling - REO Speedwagon 
Cum on Feel the Noize - Quiet Riot 
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ilguna · 1 year ago
Note
Hey! Could I get a 1 and 3 from aisle 2 for the supply run? With finnick preferably and only if it inspires you! I’m in desperate need of some soft hurt/comfort.
Congrats on everything and thanks for opening this up!
☼ moments notice (Finnick Odair) ☼
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warnings; swearing, blood mention, weapon mention.
wc; 1.4k
prompt; 1. "Just close your eyes. I will still be here when you open them again." AND 3. "I'd come for you. No matter what, when you need me, I will be there."
“(Y/n)!” 
You whip around at the sound of your name being screamed deeper in the jungle, eyes searching the thick trees for the person who’s calling for you. You take a step, eyebrows knitting together, unsure if you should be running in their direction or not.
Slowly, you reach for the spear that Katniss had to help you attach to the purple belt the Capitol provided. The vines do a very good job of making it stay in place. No matter how fast you run, or how badly it bounces on your thigh, the knot never comes loose.
You pull the long pole out of the loop, gripping the metal tightly. Maybe you didn’t hear what you thought you did. There’s a good chance it was a bird up in the trees, the chirp coincidentally sounding like your name. Still, this doesn’t ease the tension in your body.
“(Y/n)!” The scream is raw, one that was caused out of fear.
A shot of ice goes down your spine when you realize why you had such a visceral reaction the first time you heard it. It’s familiar, it belongs to the one person that matters in this world. Your feet begin to move you forward without a real plan on what to do.
“Finnick?” You call back, “Finnick!”
He begins to call back, but it’s abruptly cut off. You race toward where you’d last heard him, arms pumping, barreling through ferns, rocks and roots to reach him faster. As you get closer, you think you can see movement beyond the trees, possibly another small clearing.
You raise your free arm, anticipating to block your face from the branch you’re going to run into. Instead, you slam straight into an invisible force. The side of your arm hits your chin, as you try to twist your body away from whatever it is that’s managed to stop you so harshly.
You land on the ground, the spear a few feet away. You don’t even have time to breathe before you’re springing back up, hand outstretched to feel what it is. You come into contact with a wall, one that you weren’t able to see before. The only reason why you can now, is because you’re touching it. It warps around your hand, and smooths out as it spreads.
You push into it, wanting it to budge.
It doesn’t.
“Finnick!” You shout, snatching the spear out of the grass as you travel uphill, wanting to get a better look from the conveniently placed trees. They block your view of the clearing,
From what you can see through the leaves, he isn’t in there. You stand there for a moment, catching your breath, thinking about your next move. Which becomes obvious when you hear Johanna calling for you, from the area you were all gathered at on the beach. 
You start to jog that way, “I’m coming!”
Johanna’s standing a few feet into the treeline, watching you come toward her. As soon as you��re in reach, she wraps her hand around your wrist, pulling you with her.
“Where is he?” You breathe, looking at the beach, but you’re not going in that direction. “Is he okay?”
“He’s stuck in one of the hours.” She tells you, letting go. “We heard Katniss’ sister screaming, so she went off running after it. Finnick followed her because he’s the fastest. We heard you, too, but it sounded different.”
“Well I was—”
“No, I know that.” She cuts you off, waving her hand. “I mean, the first one we heard didn’t sound like you. Beetee says that it might’ve been engineered.”
You pause, face twisting. The Capitol fabricated your screams? 
The two of you slow down when you can see Peeta and Beetee. They look up when they can hear you rustling through the greenery. Johanna takes a few steps, and then moves out of the way to let you get a better look of the situation.
Peeta presses his forehead against the wall, his hand right next to it. If he feels comfortable enough to do this, that must mean the wall isn’t electrified in the same way the forcefield at the top of the hill is. It’s safer to touch this one for long periods of time. 
Katniss is on the other side, body turned to face in his direction, but her hands are clamped over her ears, eyes shut, head between her knees. Her whole body is rigid, and you don’t understand, until you see a dark bird divebomb at her, beak aimed for her body.
You can’t tell if it hurts her or not, because she doesn’t twitch at the impact. You move around Peeta, looking for Finnick, and find them close to Katniss, in nearly the exact same position that she’s in. Except, his nose is gushing blood.
“What happened? Why is he bleeding?”
“He ran straight into the wall.” Johanna says. “They’re going to be in there for an hour.”
“Can they hear us?” You ask.
“No, and we can’t hear them, either.” Peeta says. 
“What’s going on with the birds?”
“I believe they’re Capitol mutts, engineered to mimic their loved ones' screams. They’re programmed using artificial intelligence. All we have to do is take clips from interviews and manipulate them. It’s quite simple.” Beetee murmurs. “We do something similar in District Three.”
“And he has to sit there for a whole hour?” You ask, “Listening to this?”
“Yep.” Johanna says, lowering herself to the ground. 
You stand there, staring at Finnick. What use would your screams even have, besides leading the tributes into an area? They could’ve done anything, and they chose dive bombing birds? You don’t understand why the Capitol wouldn’t go for something more sinister, considering they’re all about torture.
“I’m right here, Katniss.” Peeta mumbles, not caring that she can’t see him. “I’m not going anywhere.”
Peeta suddenly falls forward, barely managing to catch himself in the dirt, unprepared for the wall disappearing without notice. The two of you get to your feet at the same time, but you have to walk farther to get to Finnick. Whereas he simply scoops Katniss out of the grass and goes to the beach.
You fall to your knees next to Finnick, grabbing his knee, reaching for the side of his face. You cup his cheek, running your thumb over his cheek, finding it wet from the tears.
“Finnick, honey.” You murmur. 
He looks at you, the corners of his mouth turned downward. You shake your head, scooting toward him. You grab his shoulder, pulling his body to yours. He hugs you tightly, letting out a shaky breath.
“You’re okay.” He murmurs to himself. “I thought I was too late. I thought they got you. Enobaria and Brutus… they’re fast and…”
“They could never take me down, Finn.” You tell him, stroking his hair. “You don’t have to worry about that.”
“I do, especially here. It’s not like last time.”
“I know.” You pull away to look at him. “Let’s go to the beach.”
Finnick reluctantly lets you go, but it’s not for long. The moment he’s back on his feet, he reaches over to take your hand, holding on the entire way. At the beach, you pick a spot underneath the shade, away from Katniss and Peeta.
Once the two of you sit down, he stares off at the water blankly. You let him be, listening in on the conversation the others are having a few feet away. It isn’t until Johanna volunteers to go grab water, do you feel as if enough time has passed.
“Why don’t you lay down?” You suggest. “You’re exhausted, you need to sleep.”
“I won’t help.” He mumbles.
“It might help more than you think.” You tilt your head to get a better look at his face. “This took a lot out of you.”
He shakes his head, unmoving. A few minutes later, he sighs, “Okay.”
You smile a little, crossing your legs. Finnick lowers himself onto the sand, using your thighs as a cushion for his head. You immediately reach to rake your fingers through his hair. He’s facing away from you, but you can tell he’s resisting.
“Just close your eyes.” You murmur. “I will still be here when you open them again.”
He doesn’t speak, twisting his body to look over his shoulder, at you. “You know I’d come for you, right? No matter what, when you need me, I will be there.”
“Of course you will.” You stop touching his hair. “I know you were looking for me, Finnick, because I was looking for you, too.”
--
this is part of my 3k celebration!! you can join until the cure is released on october 31st, at midnight! info at the bottom of my navigation post. you don't have to follow to participate :)
+ thank you anon!! feel free to send another :)))
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blenselche · 9 months ago
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tags: bubbline finnfern finnferntress ZaDr merge HC feral Fern Huntress Wizard dadFinn makes me cry goatmom things chickenblr gift art asks
Art request info.
My AUs:
About Keep Yourself (FinnFern) Finn has spent a decade carrying Fern's ghost on his back and in his reflection, the devastating loss of his Jungian shadow lingering softly in his footsteps.
Ch 2 Excerpt: Anxiety bubbles its way up his esophagus and Finn drowns it with a long pull off his homebrew, eyes flickering from the bottle to his prosthetic, foot tapping furiously. He sighs and gives into the itch at the back of his brain, taking the wish out and reading it over again, biting more teeth marks into a pencil already shredded down to the lead. It’s something to look forward to. Something he can put off, hoping ‘it gets better’ but it hasn’t and he’s almost certain it won’t. A morbid form of motivation to get more built, work harder, save more people, hoping against hope he’ll wake up happy before he has to spirit himself away. But none of it matters without fulfillment, sat alone and suffocating under his own melancholy in this empty space, only a facsimile of a loved one on his chest for company.
Keep Yourself Series (E rated vers.)
Keep Yourself Series (T rated vers. sans comic)
Keep Yourself AU Comic on AO3
This is a ~30 page comic spanning from Seventeen to 2k AMW that can be read without knowledge of the rest of the series and can be read as platonic.
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Keep Yourself AU posts (sketches, asks, etc.)
Keep Yourself Playlist
About Vanlife (FinnFernTress) inspired by Gregg Araki films like Nowhere, The Living End and The Doom Generation.
Finn collects Fern after his arm mishears him in his want to just go home together, and never one for reading is left ignorant of the demon contract and its terms, unknowingly burying Fern alive. Fern reforms and takes off to the Nightosphere to find himself after being forced to confront what he is. The comic starts with him reappearing six years later, much to the annoyance of Huntress Wizard, Finn's casual hook up and confidant.
Vanlife AU Comic on AO3 (posted by batch, higher quality images)
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Vanlife AU Posts (sketches, asks, etc.)
Vanlife AU Playlist
My Adventure Time AU sketchbook First chapter is for Keep Yourself fic art, the second is for miscellaneous spicy stuff I can't post here lol.
About Erasure (ZaDr/ZaGf) [on hiatus] Freight hopping, folk punk, and falling in love over and over again. (and hating it.)
Erasure AU pages in order
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Erasure AU posts (sketches, asks, etc.)
Erasure AU playlist
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bonefall · 1 year ago
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I'm still wading through some brain fog so I'm not writing as much as I want to, currently. But I have just been absently sketching Willowpelt because she's been on my mind
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I had initially been working with the "hyena" face in mind, but I've been playing around with the "villainous role" idea for Ferncloud's Parting. I mentioned it to my partner who pointed out that big, strong profiles like that are overused for "vengeful" characters.
Besides, I really love drawing that face shape anyway, so I figured I'd move away from it since it's going to be on a LOT of RiverClan cats in particular (they have longer muzzles than other Clans because they hunt in water).
I'm leaning towards "bat" now... maybe I'll retool it so it's more deer-like. Deer are totally underused as inspiration for harsh characters...
Anyway ready for some WIP material? Plus a recap of Ferncloud's Parting for all who need a refresher
(oh wow it got long. The power of girlies <3)
FERNCLOUD'S PARTING... Refresher!!
Replaces Graystripe's Vow completely, taking place just after the Impostor has been deposed and is imprisoned. Ferncloud is now the main POV, accompanied on her journey by her childhood best friend Cloudtail and the Impostor's surviving lackey, Bumblestripe.
The goal of this SE is to explore Ferncloud's relationship to her younger brother, Ashfur.
(BB canon: Ferncloud and Elderberry are the older kits of Brindleface. Ashkit was a singlet born shortly before his mother's death, raised by Fern, Elder, and their grandmother One-eye. Fireheart botched the Queen's Rights while claiming Cloudkit, but for all intents and purposes was socially his Mi... which he was not good at being. Cloudtail was Ashfur's mentor and Ferncloud's childhood friend.)
Ferncloud is asking herself the question; "What could I have done to prevent this?"
A lot of secondary questions revolve around this... Does this make her responsible for what Ashfur has done? Did she teach him anything that contributed to who he is today? Does that make her responsible?
Cloudtail is in a similar situation, as Ashfur's mentor and someone who only ever wanted to help his friend. Could HE have prevented this? He wants to find out.
Graystripe, oldest cat in ThunderClan, accompanies the little group as far as the mountain... and decides to stay there, with his golden boy, Stormfur.
Bumblestripe had come along with them all, for... a lot of complicated reasons. But the most relevant is that he had been one of the Impostor's most loyal, brutal enforcers. Berrynose was killed in a huge skirmish, and now there's just Bumblestripe left alone to shoulder his sins.
After saying goodbye to his father for what's probably the last time, getting to meet the mythical oldest brother he's been compared to his entire life, and seeing Cloud and Fern looking to visit the Old Forest Territories... Bumblestripe goes with them even further to make sure the old cats stay safe.
Like Graystripe's Vow, I'm planning to keep the split chronology. It goes back and forth between Ferncloud in the Broken Era, and Ferncloud back during the Fire Era.
The ultimate moral here, the point I want to build to, is that Cloudtail and Ferncloud did exactly what was expected of them. They raised a loyal warrior who holds the code above all. They're only responsible for Ashfur insofar as they were responsible for teaching him the same values of vengeance, violence, and distrust of outsiders as was expected... in Firestar's absence.
(Though... there's lots of other questions that I don't think FP will answer. Like, COULD they have truly stopped him? Can they ever understand WHY, if they don't currently? There's a LOT of feelings here and I don't know if all of them really have answers.)
WIP STUFF TIME
Here's new stuff, I've either not mentioned this before, or I've mentioned it in passing without actually linking it to Ferncloud's Parting.
I have a LOT of ideas here that I have to start sorting through. I think these characters are all really interesting so it's really a matter of cutting down all these little details into something more coherent.
When Ashkit is young, he's a child. There was nothing particularly outstanding about him, besides the fact he was a bit lonely and eager to please.
There's a bit of an air of "loss" when Ferncloud thinks back to Ashpaw's childhood. Elderberry and One-eye will be dying soon after the "flashback" segments, so when she goes back to the modern era, thinking about them feels bittersweet.
I also want to sneak in that Ferncloud feels jealous over Cloudtail's mateship with Brightheart lmao, because she has a crush on Brightheart. (Note, maybe tie this to Ashfur being obsessed with Squirrelflight, with Fern questioning if her jealousy rubbed off on Ashfur)
Through helping WarriorClan, Bumblestripe feels REALLY good. They don't know anything about his past, his struggles, or his failures as a person. He's just a hero to them and that feels... good.
Watching Bumblestripe be good, learning more about his issues and WHY he did what he did while following Ashfur brings Cloud and Fern some insight... but not entirely what they need. Is Ashfur just a Bumblestripe on a bigger scale? Or are they just learning more about how good of a manipulator Ashfur is? In which case... where did that ability to manipulate come from?
Fang/Honeysuckle might be Bumblestripe's half-brother. If that's the case, Bumble is... frustrated by it. MORE of his dad's complicated legacy.
Ferncloud and Cloudtail probably have some short discussions about how much is really appropriate to teach to WarriorClan... after all, they're here questioning if any part of Ashfur was THEIR fault, what if they accidentally teach them something terrible?
But at the same time, Ferncloud is the Educator of ThunderClan, and these cats can't write. The Glyph system would be very useful to them, and they're begging to learn more about Clan culture.
Putting a pin in that part, for now. Will tie back more into the conclusion that the Clan cat party ultimately reaches.
BACK IN THE PAST; Firestar is away bringing back SkyClan in Firestar's Quietus. Everything that is done is without him.
Longtail, the deputy, is blinded and a leader does not immediately rise to fill the space in ThunderClan.
And in BloodClan, their trading partner... Scourge does the same. Oops! WRONG TIME, SCOOJ!
Planning to retire, Scourge announces an event called The Frenzy. He will choose the next leader from whoever accomplishes the biggest achievement in the given timeframe. This is how BloodClan passes on leadership.
He gives his chosen heir, Claw, their first Frenzy Achievement-- the fang of a dog from his own collar. Anyone who wishes to take power instead must accomplish a feat even bigger than what had allowed SCOURGE to take power in the first place; Killing a dog.
Fury is a challenger. She does NOT want Scourge's chosen heir, Claw, to lead BloodClan next. Claw will continue the trading and friendliness towards Clan cats, which Fury wants to end.
ENTER WILLOWPELT
Willowpelt ALSO wants this trading with BloodClan to stop. She feels it's gone too far.
BloodClan killed her mate-- Whitestorm. Firestar might have been willing to just throw his life away for this, but she's NOT.
She's recovering from a boar bite, currently, but it's scarring up nicely... and she's willing to pretend she's injured a little longer if it shakes suspicion off her.
She doesn't WANT to be allies with Fury, but if her goal is to bring BloodClan back into isolation... then, Willowpelt will do it.
And Fury promises her something else; Revenge. Scourge is the reason why Whitestorm died, and together, they can ruin his plans and make him watch as his peaceful little power transfer crumbles into ash.
GOOD SETUP IMO but I still need to work out what nefarious deed they'll do, exactly. All I know is that Fury will betray Willowpelt at the height of it. Maybe something about taking over Barley's barn. Maybe Elderberry gets killed.
But, I have one very strong feeling in mind; Ferncloud probably ends up killing Fury while Ashpaw watches or even helps.
Hmm... maybe Graystripe (becomes deputy as soon as Firestar gets back for handling this crisis so well) ordered them to let Fury go.
But Ferncloud looked at Fury, and decided that Willowpelt was right about one thing. Most BloodClan cats cannot be trusted.
The code does not apply equally to outsiders.
Maybe I WILL have Fury end up killing Elderberry in some way, and then give Ferncloud and Ashpaw a conversation about it. "Those who don't live by the code will not be protected by it. And we must protect our Clan... even if Graystripe doesn't realize it."
I could make it clear that Fury is not a threat at that point, having been beaten in some way and Claw ascending to BloodClan leadership. OR I could have left it open-ended, like, maybe Fury would be a future problem, maybe not. Not sure yet.
Willowpelt of course will also need to experience some consequences for this... unleeeess, I have Graystripe let her off really easy exactly because she's Clanborn, which even Cloudtail is frustrated about, maybe even coining the term "Codebreaker" as an insult under his breath.
In any case, Ferncloud never told Cloudtail about how she secretly killed Fury. It's too juicy to have her reveal it to him in the modern day, explaining that it IS her fault, she DID teach him the wrong thing.
Hmm... I'm talking myself into it. Though I did also like the original vibe that Ashfur's tyranny was kind of unknowable, trying to make sense out of a senseless thing he did. I think it feels a lot more interesting for Ferncloud to have been hiding this for literal years, and now feeling like she has to "pay the world back" for what she did.
Maybe even build towards something metal about Fury's grave. Hmm... maybe to hide the murder, she buried her in Elderberry's freshly dug one, since no one would notice the soil had been recently disturbed as it was JUST dug.
Buried my sister and my secret victim in the same grave. ~Just Girlie Things~
Cloudtail sitting here, War Criminal to the right and Secret Murderer to the left like "can i ever be around normal people. like, just once"
Jokes aside... Cloudtail needs to point out something very important. Ferncloud regretted what she did, and she never did what Ashfur is doing. She never sought power, when Firestar came back she's lived a long life without ever once undermining him, and even her beliefs have softened over time.
She was a Traditionalist back then, but is Fire Alone now. After everything. The destruction of the forest, loss of her kits, WindClan rebellion, reveal of Squirrelflight and Leafpool's secret...
She's helped to raise every new generation as the Educator. And yet, Ashfur, the Impostor, is unique.
And look at Bumblestripe... being Graystripe's son didn't stop him from being the Impostor's lackey.
We all make our choices. HE made his. You made your own.
But... I don't feel like Ferncloud can entirely accept that as an answer either. There would be a very forlorn sort of feeling here. Yes, we all make our own choices-- but we influence each other. For better and for worse. And she refuses to avoid responsibility for that.
Maybe in that moment I'll have her make the choice to return home, and BE the one who becomes the Light in the Mist to face Ashfur in the Dark Forest. Seems to be coming together.
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woneuntonzz · 10 months ago
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competitive academic rival!eunseok x overachiever, afab!reader
“ started with a spark,¹ now we're on fire.² ” ; (2/2)
warning/s: cussing, violent thoughts
content: songfic, enemies to lovers, academic rivals, fluff, incy-wincy bit of angst, very lovey-dovey i'm actually attached, mention of other idol names for world building !!
wc: 7.4k!!
⋆⭒°。⋆ i feel like we've made it pretty far, now we're stargazing ☄️ ; inspired by The Neighbourhood's Stargazing 🎶
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It was a joke when Yunjin said Eunseok might take her place as your one and only best friend, but you figured there might be a slight truth to it. It wasn't that you'd dismiss Yunjin entirely, it's just that overtime, one instance of being project partners will become a sort of regimen for the two of you, him trailing behind you, calling out, “Partner, wait up!” as you walk to wherever you're headed. 
You would still exchange playful banters —some not sounding very playful at all— and would still contest each other during class recitations, but it was all fair and square, unlike before where it'd be blood, sweat and tears, not in a literal sense of course. 
“You should write this part. You're great at expressing your opinion.” This time, you two partnered up for statement writing —that supposedly was for a group of three.
“You really think so?” you tilted your head at him, jestful taunting hinted in your voice.
“Yeah. You're beautiful.” 
You knew he wasn't finished speaking, but a part of you wished it had ended there.
“—your narrative I mean. If there's anything I'd like to correct, I'd say you take a little too long to get to the point, but overall your writing is great.” you nod, flailing away the lost hope in your eyes.
It's been three months since you've grown to treat each other like a friend. It was something your past selves would've never foreseen, like a switch had been accidentally turned on. 
You wouldn't change a thing, though. Even if everything was only by chance, you wish it would stay till after highschool graduation, or, till all of your senses died out —till you were sure there was no way of seeing or hearing him ever again. 
The thought was so unhinged for you at first, but denying is for underdogs, and you were no loser. 
Considering the time you've spent with him, a big part of the blame is on him. Well how could you not blame him? when your conversations were at its tamest, he would resort to saying things that made you think more than when your history teacher would throw around riddles for you to figure out what he was trying to teach. 
“You really like green? that's kind of gross.” you scoffed at his comment after he'd observe that most of the things you owned were of your favorite color.
You hold up your phone, showing the back of your fern-colored phone case. “It's fern. Maybe you're thinking about a gross shade of green —why does it matter to you anyways?”
“I just thought you'd like a different type of color, like blue.” he slightly shrugged, his eyes wandering to the keychain dangling at your bag's zipper.
“I like blue, but I see it all the time, everywhere, so my eyes are kind of tired of it at this point.” you gave him an innocent smile, one that would soon falter when he replied,
“You see me all the time, I hope you like me too.”
What kind of idiot says that? —you were determined not to emit much of a reaction, you feared it might be too much for the both of you, and that he might be just that friendly with those he considered friends. Of course I like you. —you weren't sure though, if it was only harmless feelings you'd have for a best friend, or if it was this almost electric sensation that made everything else around you fade away from the void of your mind as you isolate yourself with the thought of him. 
After two weeks of somewhat careful reflecting, you realized that it was the latter. 
He'd accept his feelings around the same time you did, but he most certainly caught it first. He'd tell himself that you never minded his incidental wording, not realizing just how bad he was at reading people. He just wouldn't catch the way your eyes would linger from where they last situated after he spoke because he was too afraid to look at you long enough to catch your reaction. 
You were both so convinced that you did such a great job of hiding from each other, but the people around you could say otherwise. 
Eunseok would start biting the inside of his cheek when Shotaro told him, “You know what you two remind me of? like a very, painfully slow basketball game.”
“Come again?” his friend laughs at him, poking fun at the confusion plastered on his face.
“She likes you too, I mean, why else would she stick around you and always be your partner?” The idea made him bite into his bottom lip, reminiscing about the way things used to be before the near fallout —the essay incident. 
She's a people pleaser —but he couldn't just say that, and he knew you struggled with it too, he just wouldn't figure out why just yet. “She just finds it hard to say no to anyone.”
“Okay, partner.” Shotaro's teasing had him shaking his head.
It was something he wanted to help you with, saying no, taking care of yourself first. You kept giving and giving, it was something he never understood about you when he knew it's normal to be tired, angry, sad, and it's most certainly normal to refuse to save yourself from the anguish.
With you, he chose to be careful. He wanted you to be comfortable with him, to be ready when you finally him why you would always say yes to everyone, why you were so stubborn and so willing to give so much of your time and energy for the benefit of someone else who wouldn't even bat an eye if you got hit by a speeding truck.
It pained him to see you fake your keenness whenever Yuri, Ahra, or some other piece of shit chased after you in the hallway. They'd never directly say it, but they were basically asking you for their grades, all while you had to make sure yours were better than last quarter's results.
If you weren't taking care of yourself, he would, as much as his courage allowed him to.
The end of the school year was just right around the corner, you were busy all month preparing, elections for next year's student council were being held before the end of the year.
Eunseok was already a part of the student council, he was a public information officer, a very recognized one at that, but this time he was running for president. 
He wanted you to run alongside him, as his vice president, but you were afraid that it was way beyond your limits. You have been a part of the student council before, the year he transferred in your school, you were a peace officer, but that's the farthest you've gone. You've lost elections the next year, and the current year, you lost the public information officer position to him.
Still, he was able to encourage you to run for secretary. And like he promised —though not verbally— he helped you throughout everything.
“I haven't gotten much sleep last night, sorry for drooling on your sleeve.” you lazily tried to wipe off the wet stain on his forearm that you had accidentally napped on whilst he explained something about initiatives, you couldn't quite recall.
He had actually stopped speaking when he saw the way you tried to fight your drowsiness. He felt bad for almost laughing, but the way your eyelids would shut itself and you forcing them open only to fail seconds later, he thought it was adorable. 
“It's okay.” he moved his forearm, it was a signal to tell you to lie your head on it again. “You can rest.”
Your mind was still a bit hazy. You wiped your eyes and you would keep doing so, progressively becoming more forceful until he stopped you by taking ahold of your wrist. “Hey, stop, your eyes will hurt.”
He looked at them. He could almost feel your exhaustion, but even through it he could only see how lovely the color in your eyes were. 
“Sorry, I was just up all night doing…” What did you do? oh, right,
“Someone else's work? don't be sorry. Give yourself a break, please.” you would lock eyes with him when he said please, his voice was pure silk, gliding through the very cracks of your soul, it almost made your eyes brim with tears. 
The elections would roll around. You two would be inseparable by then, leading people to think you were running for vice president since he was with you more than he was with the actual running vice of your partylist. Even then, if they were being honest, they'd vote for the two of you. The pair of you were like a premium package in the market, two perfectly flawed individuals promoting your ambitions to the whole school. 
Your confidence flourished like never before, and the stutter you always had when speaking, you were way past it. You received so much support and encouragement, not only from him, but also from your best friend Yunjin who ran for vice president and other candidates in your partylist. 
You were happy with how everything was turning out, and so was he. He was confident you'd get the spot, not even caring any longer if he lost. He just wanted to see you succeed in something you've worked so hard to achieve for so long. 
“I hope I get it this time. I've been beating myself up for not having enough confidence to get myself into bigger opportunities.” he heard you say to Yunjin when you were all getting ready to go home. 
He didn't need to say anything because your friend was already there to assure you, but his stare was enough to tell you that he cared. He wanted you to know that he believed in you, more than you believe in yourself.
The sequel to your odyssey wouldn't be announced till the next school year began, but until then, you two would keep contact. It would start off with him popping up in your notifications with a little, hey how r u —which would shortly be followed by, it's eunseok btw.
yeah ik it's u —you laughed quietly to yourself, legs against your chest as you got comfy on your living room sofa. i alr have u saved in my contacts.
he would immediately reply, oh right
—lmao
You would subconsciously pucker your lips as you typed, whats up?  
the sky? —you physically cringed at his reply, funny for being so unfunny.
bro? 😭
bro…
idk it's been two weeks
since school ended?
yeah
and it'll only take like less than a month till we're back
but suffering is for the weak 💪
right 💪
kinda miss it too
props to u for missing school ig
i meant to say you
lmao
It was normal to say things like that to your friends, you and Yunjin say it to each other when you reunite after a considerably long time of not seeing each other, so, this must be… normal, right?
that's oddly sweet of u
hbu?
same
it's not the same w/o ur annoying ass
annoying or not
i know u love my ass
eww????
Maybe not his ass. 
You two would go on with your little convos every other day, that would soon turn into everyday, to every other hour, into phone calls.
would it be weird if i asked to call rn
why
u wanna?
yea
feeling lazy to type jus saying
call me then
You thought maybe you sounded too sure of yourself than you actually were, cause when he called, you fumbled, trying to fix yourself before you answered —it was pointless since it was an audio call and he won't even be able to see the pillow lining marked on your face from laying down for so long as you chatted with him. 
He also had no reason to feel lazy at all, in fact the only activity he'd been up to is on his phone, talking to you. He just wanted to hear from you again, because at that point you two still had sixteen days left before you got to see each other again.
“Y/n” he spoke as soon as you picked up.
“Eunseok.” you said back, imitating his tone. 
“The voting results are out, I'm looking at it right now, on my laptop.” you could almost hear him gulp before he spoke again. “We got it.”
You yelped, but rushed to cover your mouth. “Shit, is that for real?”
“Yep. It's for real alright.” his smile was wide, like the one he wore when you finally accepted his offer to be his project partner.
“Oh my fucking —thank you Seok. I love you, I love you guys so much, holy shit.” his eyes were wide open as he listened to your celebratory exclamations. 
You loved him? He knew it was your utter excitement speaking, but deep down he just wished he could hear it again, just those three precious words.
──────────﹒★﹒﹒──﹒﹒★﹒──────────
Time flew by, but not like how it usually would. This time it actually seemed to be a little slower. Maybe it was because you spent the majority of your break talking to him, which you didn't even think was possible. What was even there for the two of you to talk about outside of school? you two had never gone below surface level conversations, then suddenly he was approaching you in school all smiley while holding a cup of iced coffee?
“Drink up Sleepy, my favorite dwarf.” he sounded so sweet, but it was a tease. 
Suddenly your height became a topic of discussion, comparing you to one of Snow White's seven dwarfs, and he'd pinpoint the one who was most like you. Sleepy, always sleepy —and also pretty small. You weren't even that small, he was just a bit —no, he was a total tease. You'd mention it was your dad's genes, then it would turn into you telling him that you and your dad weren't really close at all. 
It was a drastic shift, but he learned to appreciate the trust you've granted him by telling him those things, and he would find out about the emotional neglect that went unnoticed by you yourself. 
You carefully took the cup from his hand, and with a smile you said, “Thank you, Seok.”
If back then he hid his emotions from you and everyone else, now he had his smile on full display, facing its very cause, you. He had learned how to read you now, and he knew he was getting somewhere when your voice had started to soften at certain times. Your voice that was usually dominant, almost sounding demanding in a way, he would be one of the few who would hear it completely disappear, and taking its place would be a sound he could only describe as his sweetest dreams.
Hearing you speak again in face to face for the first time after a while felt unreal almost, he felt ecstatic from your voice alone, so much so that he almost forgot that he was to be announced as student council president that day.
During orientation, you would be declared as student council secretary, and he's the president —the president who stood next to you instead of his designated place, next to the vice president. Yunjin stood where he was supposed to be, you noticed and whispered to him, “Hey, go back to your position.” but he'd just chuckle at your furrowed eyebrows. “Seok?”
His gaze was fixated on you, and it was like the whole world stopped for the two of you. “Hmm?”
“Congratulations, and, thank you. I really owe you one.” he chuckled again, and all you could see was him. 
“You don't owe me anything, but thank you for trusting me, congrats Sleepy.” his smile caused your mind to almost lose itself, eyes wandering down to the glint on his lips. 
Suddenly you wondered if they would feel as soft as the words he had spoken to you. You were ashamed that you would think that about your best friend, but he was thinking the same thing, eyes fixated on your velvet lips.
Nothing would come out of it, for fact, it would be as if nothing ever happened. But you both knew, the way you looked at each other was different. Heck, you could never even spare anyone else a second of eye contact. At that point, you two knew each other well enough, as opponents, and eventually as close friends. Now he just had to figure out how to know you as his lover. 
──────────﹒★﹒﹒──﹒﹒★﹒──────────
The two of you would be busy as ever and being together in those situations served as a perk, for even with the urge to just throw away your paperwork and drop out of school, you were able to continue with each other's motivation, each other's smiles, each other's voices.
—each other's touch. “Are your hands okay?” 
He eyed your fingers that had green guard bandages on them. You've been writing a lot, not only for being a secretary, but also for the ridiculous amount of school work you had piled up and had to finish before the end of the week. 
He was hesitant, but you kept yourself busy and it gave him a push to just go for it. Moments later, your writing would be interrupted as a hand reached out for yours. 
“Rest for a while. We have plenty of time before the next period.” was all he said as he enclosed your hand in his grasp. 
His touch felt warm, relieving you of the pain and the pressure everything's been giving you lately. When he moved his thumb against your skin, you just wanted to drag him with you and run away from everything and everyone. 
Realization would only hit you when from a distance, you saw a few of your classmates looking at the two of you, then whispering to each other. 
“Hey Y/n, I hope you're not too busy—”
“What?” Ahra had approached again, but this time Eunseok answered for you.
“Oh, I just needed help with the gen bio activity.” she eyed your linked hands.
“Right, just give me your paper, I'll sort it out for you.” Ahra handed you her activity sheet, but it was Eunseok who'd snatch it from her hand and retort,
“You people can't do anything for yourselves? Jesus.” he had an ill-tempered glare that he kept on the paper he held, but he gave your hand a gentle squeeze. “If you need it so badly, I'll do It. Fifty bucks.”
“But I don't have fifty bucks on me right n—”
“Then go find someone else to pester.” he says as he hands Ahra's paper back to her. 
Ahra takes it and walks away in shame, and spite. Why did he have to be there to ruin everything?
You were worried Ahra would be up to speaking ill of you to others like past classmates have done to you before, but he reassured you.
“They don't have to matter, besides, you're not obligated to take responsibility for their own.” just think about you and I —he finishes his words in his mind, not afraid to admit, but afraid to say it. 
Even if he didn't say it, you were already thinking it. Because why would anything else matter when you had him and he had you. The summit of your dreams used to be these superficial things, and now it would be a future, a future of a better life, living off of pure contentment and bliss. A future together.
It would all remain unsaid, but you could feel it with each other. 
Through him, you would learn to say no without much thought of the consequences all you had to think about is his fond eyes greeting you once you've successfully overcome your struggles. 
And through you, he learned to be more open and considerate. He would finally see things from others' perspectives, helping him understand what he needed to do as the president of the student council, and as your… 
Well, what was he to you? What were you to each other?
The label would be unclear to everyone, and to you both, but you were sure that you had something. You shared the same feelings and the same longing whenever your time with each other was cut short.
It was almost as if your only reason to go to keep attending school was to see each other and be with each other. It was easier to stick around with one another since you were both major parts of the student council, so when people asked if you two had a thing, there was only one answer.
“Well, we run the student council.” and apparently you ran in each other's minds too. 
sleepy  
don't force yourself to go to school tmrw ok?
but there's literally a presentation
and?
if u present with a stuffy nose and phlegm in your throat would that be any better?
no…
good
u better rest and not tire urself with ANYTHING else
oki
thanks seok :>
miss u alr lol  
u know i miss u more
it's so hard to bear with these ppl without u around
see? this is why i need to go to school...
hell no
get ur ass some rest
i'll see u when u feel better <33
It was usually you who would be too sick to go to school, and he quickly picked up on your routine of going to school with allergies that'll turn into a fever by the end of the day, and you would be out of school for a day or two, and he'd always make sure to check in on you through messages or calls.
Soon enough though, he'd show up outside your house. It was a risky move, but he was always lucky enough that your parents weren't around to see him. 
“You're really outside my house? Are you crazy?” you sneezed into your phone right after you spoke.
You heard his sweet chuckle from the other line. “Yeah, cutie. I have something for you, can you go down? or is there a way for me to get in? Is it through the doggy door or your bedroom window?”
Your laughter was weak due to the phlegm in your body. “Wait, wait, I'll open the door for you.”
Somehow, the thought of seeing him gave you enough energy to rush down the stairs to welcome him. 
You ended the call on your phone as you opened the door, and there he was. “Hey Sleepy, looking real groggy there.”
A playful glare made its way onto your face, and he'd laugh loud enough for you to hear despite the distance.
“Can I come in?” of course you let him in.
He had about two hours before your parents came back. He got you food, very warm and comforting seaweed soup and a cup of warm lemon tea. 
He watched you eat a couple bites, very slowly and feebly. He grew worried about the way you struggled with just holding the spoon up to your mouth. “May I?”
Honestly, why'd he even ask? he would do it anyway even if you refused —in this case you weren't even able to utter a reply. He takes the spoon, and feeds you, being very gentle, even wiping away some stray soup from the corners or your lips and your chin. 
Luckily, you weren't too sick to miss his enamored eyes and for a moment he'd stop feeding you, wiping your bottom lip, allowing his gaze on it linger. Flustered, you'd bite down on it with the strength you had. 
He chuckles, looking down for a brief moment. “You're so adorable.” —and a soft pinch to your cheek.
──────────﹒★﹒﹒──﹒﹒★﹒──────────
Your final year in highschool has finally ended. Elation coursed throughout your body when you received your medal as salutatorian, and of course, he was your valedictorian.
All those years he thought he was graduating with not much to look forward to. It was life, he graduates, and graduates again, then he'd be out making big contributions to the economy. But now, you would be in his list of aspirations, because at that point, none of you have ever thought of confessing, but still looked in each other's eyes like they were the only ones that existed. 
The day of your graduation, he'd run to you —which startled you a bit— and carry you by your sides, spinning you once before settling you back down again. All you could hear was each other's laughter, and he'd engulf you in his embrace.
“We've made it pretty far.” —and you both wanted to go further, further from what you already had, a reassurance, a settlement.
You two would keep constant contact the whole time you prepared yourselves for college. It could be a miracle, or maybe it was truly meant to be —you two got into your dream university. 
In all honesty, he never had a dream university. He'd only have one when he heard it from you. “Yonsei seems like a great university.” —his dream will always and only lie with you.
You spent your days talking, daydreaming about college life. You both knew it wasn't something to daydream about since it would only get harder from then, but it was driven by the thought that all this time, you would still be together. Still, none of you would outrightly say it. 
“Imagine we'd get forced to drink with our seniors.” you let your phone lay close to your head on your bed as you spoke to him on call.
And to that he replied, “I'd never let that happen.”
You laughed, and it was the most beautiful song he's ever heard. He ended up laughing with you. 
“I'm serious.” he adds, still laughing. 
“I know, Seok. I know.”
The time would come eventually. You two would be in two different departments —he was in computer science— but fortunately, your seniors seemed to only know one place where they could pressure the freshmen to their favor.
Eunseok walks up to the table where you're at, you two have had your eyes on each other ever since you've step foot in that place. 
He held onto the strap of his shoulder bag, looking into your honeyed eyes. “Let's go home.”
Everyone had their eyes on him, then on you. “Woah, woah, and who's this pretty boy? Why are you cutting our Y/n's fun so short in the night huh?”
“Y/n doesn't drink.” your seniors looked at you and you nod, keeping your eyes on him.
You extend your hand out to him, and soon you would feel sanctuary. 
No other words were said as he pulled you along with him to the exit, not minding to spare the others another look. His hand still held onto yours as he walked you back to your dorm room. You were both quiet the entire time, your social batteries drained to its very limits from the orientation activities and the higher-ups pressuring the both of you to join them waste away.
Before completely letting go of you, you would both stop in front of your door, facing each other. 
“See, I told you so.” you laughed at his playful jabbing.
“Okay, my firefighter. Thank you for saving me.” his eyes wandered down to your lips once again, but they would shift back up to your forehead.
He wipes the bit of sweat on it with his thumb, letting his palm slowly glide down and rest on your cheek. 
“I said no, you know, but they kept insisting I come with them.” his hand went from your cheek to your chin, gently taking a hold of it.
“I know Sleepy. It's alright. It happened to me too.” 
You wondered what would happen next. The tension had only grown stronger, it was only the two of you in that hallway, it was you, him and the desire dispersed throughout the silence of the halls —but nothing was salvaged from it. The looks in your eyes yearned for the feeling of each other's lips, but he held back. 
His hands cupped your face, slightly squishing your cheeks together. “You kinda look like Keroppi.” a bittersweet chuckle leaves his mouth. “Good night, Y/n.”
Before he could walk away, your embrace would stop him, and he'd hug back, almost not wanting to ever let go. His hand wandered to the back of your head, gently caressing your hair. 
“Good night Seok.”
That night was definitely one to remember, one that made you realize, he's always loved Keroppi, does that mean he loves me too? —maybe you were taking it too far, but it wasn't impossible. You saw it, you felt it, his amore through the feeling of his skin against yours. 
Every moment you've shared with him felt like a push, just say it, just do it, but none of you would budge. 
Your best friend Yunjin was in the same department as him, she didn't see you as often as he would, but when she did, she wanted to just push your faces into each other, just kiss already —she'd think to herself as she observed the two of you just being so lost in each other.
At one point you'd feel bad for not spending as much time as you used to with her, but after talking to her about it, she reassured you that she wasn't an obligation for you to worry about, but she'd always be there when you needed her, and of course you would be there for her too. 
You thought you were lucky that both of your favorite people were in the same department, shared the same classes, that way it was easier for you to see them and hang out simultaneously. 
Doubt would start swimming around the oceans of your thoughts —one day you were set to meet them in the campus library. Your pace was a bit speedy, wearing such a gleeful smile, you walked to meet them again after the longest week of your life. The campus library was huge, but it wouldn't take you a while to spot them.
Your first instinct was to run up to them, but maybe it was your exhaustion that had stopped you from doing so and instead just stand there for a while, watching them laugh together from a distance, and they would get so close to each other that your breath almost hitched. 
You felt insecure, but also hated yourself for even allowing these feelings to surge. They're also good friends, your best friends, you were more fond of one of them for sure, but you both loved and cared for them just as much.
Your worries would subside once you were finally seated next to him. Your eyes lingered on each other's allure, it was quite clear that you two had this certain look reserved for each other. 
“Oh, look. The project partners are back again.” —your harmonious laughter would fill your ears.
At first it came easy, but then it wasn't.
Being in different departments meant seeing them from afar walking side by side, and you would find that they would be together a lot more than before.
When they'd meet with you, they were together, almost all the time. At first you thought, it was easier that way for them, and for you especially. 
Then love month came around. Everyone was busy preparing booths for the Feb Fair celebration. It was three days long, and everyone wanted it to be perfect, single or not, it was three days of just love, love for friends, family, for him.
Just a few days before Feb Fair started, despite your efforts of searching for him everywhere you could, sadly, your efforts would be futile. 
hi seok
been looking for u everywhere
u busy? —delivered, 4 hours ago.
sorry 
shit sorry 
i am kinda busy
but not like usual
it's for something vv special :))
that's nice 
you have any plans for feb fair?
anyone asked u out yet?
even if anyone did i would reject them lol
would u reject me then? —read, 10 minutes ago.
it's okay roppi lmaooo
tbh i'd say yes w/o u even asking
really?
so it's settled then?
you got it :3
shit
i got the prettiest date for feb fair 🙈
You seemed to have forgotten about the roots of your agitations once you've gotten a chance to talk with him again. 
You made sure you would look the prettiest when you were with him. You wore a blue dress, he never said it was his favorite, but you did see it quite often in the items he owned, and some in his wardrobe.
But maybe you should've gone for green. The first day of Feb Fair, entering the area of festivities, a band playing some overrated love song would serve as soft background music for everyone else indulged in the love, it's in the air as they'd claim.
Maybe this would be the day, the day you would finally admit to each other's feelings, confess.
You walked around, taking in the luminous fairy lights, and the fake flowers that accompanied them. Even if they were artificial, they were still really pretty, and you would be the living depiction of those flowers, your dress flowing with the cool breeze as your eyes glimmered with the stars. 
When he saw you, his whole world stopped. You were suddenly the only one he could see. He wished he was quick enough to rush over to you, hold your hand, but you were gone, like the wind. 
You had seen him handing over a bouquet to your best friend —Yunjin, and at that moment you thought she looked so perfect that you thought your presence was unwanted. 
Maybe it was a mistake, maybe he didn't mean it at all. Maybe you were only meant to be a bridge for them. 
That night, you would lock yourself in your room, ignoring the calls and messages in your phone and your own roomate. You just kept yourself under your covers. 
“Hey, um, Y/n, Eunseok's outside.”
“Please tell him to go away.” you cried out. 
And your roommate would do just that. His heart would sink, but it was a lot worse compared to when you had first rejected his efforts of asking you as his project partner. 
It was like the past all over again. There you cried all alone, then, it used to be because of an essay and his egocentric self, now it was because of a bouquet, and his fleeting promise. 
He just hoped he could talk to you again.
y/n it wasn't what you thought it was
i'll explain to you when we meet again
please
i'm sorry
i'll wait for you by the water fountain tomorrow —delivered, 10 hours ago. 
be my partner, please? —delivered, 30 minutes ago.
It was the second day of the Feb Fair. You were still isolating yourself in your room. You wondered where they could be. You still hadn't opened your phone so you thought, maybe they're together, like they always were.
You hopelessly sat on your bed, munching on some snacks. Suddenly it would hit you that all the food you had in your pantry was from him. Holding back your tears, you would let the packet of gummy worms fall down on your bed, with you feeling defeated. 
Feeling like you needed to move, you got up from your bed, weakly opening your closet. 
I should've worn the green dress. —unlike the blue one, it was more casual, and the most important detail of all, it had a cute little frog on the right chest area. You let your finger trace the frog imprint, almost tearing up again. 
Closing your closet, you turned around, ready to plop yourself back down onto your bed, but your phone lit up again. 
maybe tomorrow? :)) —read, 4 minutes ago.
When he saw that you had read his message, he wore a hopeful smile. Maybe, just maybe, you'd show up the next day, or maybe in the night. He promised that this time, he won't skimp on his words, he was going to tell you everything.
It was already dark, nearing 9:00 pm when he had messaged you. You were admittedly worried and guilty for making him wait till that time of the night. 
Reading through his messages again, you knew you needed to show up. Because you trusted him. Trust, you almost forgot. You have given him so much of it. 
The next day, you got up relatively early, at least earlier than your roommate. She'd wake up to you already dolled up.
“That's a cute dress.” she said, she had her hands against her sides, looking around for a while before asking, “Um, if you don't mind, are you and Eunseok… okay now?”
“We'll be alright.” the tiredness in your voice was still evident, and so your roommate would just give you a smile, nodding as she left to go to the bathroom. 
You were going to make it right. This was the final push, you would finally tell him how you've felt about him, from the very start of it all up to now when you longed for him.
Still at the water fountain, Eunseok sat there anxiously. He sat there, and in his hand was a box. It was all, and everything he had kept of you, and if ever he lost you —and he prays to God it would never happen— he'd have your memories in this box, his most cherished ones.
6:00 pm, his eyes grew a thin layer of water as he watched everyone else with such loving eyes and sugared laughter. He looked up at the sky, and he thanked it for being so full for that night, full of glittering stars. He took it as a sign that you would come soon, because last night there were no stars at all, and you didn't arrive. 
“I'll be your partner.”
He froze in his spot, stare still fixated on the constellations above him. 
He stood up, bringing his gaze down to you. You eyed the box he held with both his hands, “Y/n.”
Your eyes lit up, hearing his voice emit your name very faintly. You let him walk closer to you, just enough for you to see his eyes glisten against the fairy lights. 
“The flowers, well, I helped Yunjin look for them. They were meant to be for someone else, she won't tell me who. I'm guessing it might be Chaewon since she kept asking me about her, if you remember, Chaewon's my cousin.” —well shit. Isn't it just so easy to be stupid?
“Sorry.” he hurriedly used one of his hands, hesitantly reaching out for the one he's been dying to hold since the day he thought he'd lose you, for the second time.
“Don't be sorry. Please. I should've…” he glanced down at your entwined hands, your hand was cold. “... just told you that…”
Again, he'd struggle to find his words and you'd bring your hand up to his cheek, “Seok?”
“I like you and I think I'm in love with you —no, I am. I…” he was almost breathless, and you'd gently move his head to meet his soft eyes. 
“Song Eunseok, I want to be your partner, in the long run, and maybe, till I can no longer write essays and make grammatical errors, will you be my partner —for life?”
Eunseok had always dreamed of going to space and seeing the shimmering little specks of wonder up-close. He knew they were just fiery rocks, but unlike him, who others would describe as still and emotionless, these rocks shined, and they were beautiful. You are so beautiful. He'd finally have a star to himself. His dreams, driven by his childhood imaginations, were coming true, in the form of you.
Finally, he would lean in, finally feeling your plush lips against his. You're as sweet as he imagined. 
“Till I can no longer correct you, I'll be your partner.” he uttered against your lips.
Later that night, you two would be seated on the ground, leaning your backs against the base of the water fountain —he'd let you use his arm as a cushion for your back, well, he insisted. The fireworks had already died down, and you two were still there.
You were going through the box he had prepared for you. 
“You kept this?” It was the essay, the nameless copy. 
“Yeah, but look, look.”
He had written stuff all over it, and drew a bunch of Keroppis. And he had checked it like how your English teacher back then would, with one singular correction where he wrote, you missed a word miss know-it-all, doesn't matter though, i miss you more.
“When did you do this?” he watched fondly as you chuckled, reading through his little notes and doodles.
“I checked that essay the day you rejected my 'partner proposal' for the second time.” you looked at him wide-eyed. 
“You… missed me then?”
“Yes?” 
Then you'd see receipts of every breakfast coffee, every ice cream meeting —you never called it a date because you were just being professional, every candy packet and every wet wipe purchase he had ever made for you, all stapled together with little tmi's on them, y/n really likes green. i should buy more green shirts.
You chortled. “Don't laugh!”
“No! I just think it's really cute!”
wait holy shit, i wish i could draw well THE WAY SHE SMILED AT ME. i won. fuck everyone. 
“You've liked me for that long?” looking into his eyes again, you'd melt into his loving stare. 
He had been watching you smile through his sweet little shenanigans that you never would've thought he'd been up to this time. “Yes, I have.”
You bit your bottom lip, still your smile showed through it. With a gulp, you'd place a quick kiss on his lips, making him freeze once again. 
With an innocent smile, you went back to rummaging through the box. “Wait, this was my favorite pen. You hid it?”
“I've been using it around you ever since I got it, I thought you'd notice.”
“I just thought you used the same brand. Shame on you, thief.”
You would laugh together for the rest of the night, reminiscing about the past, how you both hid your painfully obvious liking for each other, and then a moment of silence. 
You admired the array of stars that shined throughout the body of the sky as you laid your head on his shoulder, his hand holding yours like it was its only purpose. 
“Thank God Yuri plagiarized your essay.”
You playfully hit his knee, laughing out, “What do you mean?”
“Just imagine, If I never realized my feelings for you, I'd never make an effort to ask you as my project partner, and we'd stay the same, me still a jerk, and you…”
“Still saying yes to everyone? Well, that makes sense, but, what if we're really meant to end up where we are now?”
“We are meant to be, aren't we?” You felt him place a kiss on your head. “So, what's your opinion on officially being my girlfriend?”
You sat up, startling him a bit, but he'd chuckle once he saw the cheeky grin on your face. “You know how you've always taught me how to say no?”
You giggled when you saw his smile diminish. 
“Well, you're no idiotic low-life, so yes, Eunseok, I'll be your girlfriend.” he leans in and hugs you, and you both fall over. “Wait what the fuck.”
“Sorry, sorry.” he helped you get up.
You would get lost in each other's eyes again, and eventually your lips were linked once more. You had your arms wrapped around his neck, and his hands on your waist. You pulled away, and you'd laugh at each other's breathless states.
“I honestly don't know why you still asked me to be your girlfriend when I asked you to be my partner for life.”
“I'm an anxious man, okay? but I just really wanted to be sure, and I wanted to ask for myself, that was the initial plan anyways, I can't believe you ruined my plan.”
“Excuse me? you seem to sound so offended now.”
“So what if I am?”
The stars were once only a tiny glimpse of hope for him, now drew the two of you. First two very distant stars, one shone blue and the other shone red, the blue star almost died, but the red star gave some of her flame, and soon they would ignite the fire they would share. 
She said yes, finally. —he knew you'd ignite his flame again, and with an unspoken promise to himself —and to you, he'd grow to love you more and more, every single day.
Fin.
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would you like to go back?
> take me back
> no :)) (thank you for stargazing with me)
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shinakazami1 · 2 years ago
Text
TSP FERNATOR THEORY – THE ROLE OF NATURE IN THE STANLEY PARABLE
Oh gosh, I took this so seriously but hope someone will enjoy my rambling ;w; Just will say it here - this essay is game interpretation, it doesn't talk about Fernator AU (only mentions it).
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Contents
0. What is Fernator AU?
 “Stanley, this fern will be very important later in the story.” (Confusion, Bucket Destroyer & Figleys Endings – Fern)
“It's all out of my control now.” (Skip Button)
“Yes, I have something very exciting to show you!“ (TSP 2 Expo)
“And Stanley was happy.” (Outdoors - Freedom Ending and Memory Zone)
“The office could use a bit of decoration.” (Other plants in-game, Games Ending, Epilogue) 
Conclusions
(Click 'Read More')
0. WHAT IS FERNATOR AU
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Fernator AKA Fernnarrator AKA Fernie is my TSP AU where the Narrator takes the form of the Fern and gets moved into the Bucket.
His form can change into any plant, either through a conscious decision or subconsciously, based on his emotions. While some of his flowers blooming can fit the conventional flower language, he creates his own based on his own bias for the plants.
The AU isn’t purely cosmetic – depending on his and Stanley’s relationship before the discovery of Narrator being the Fern, it splits into 3 main pathways. 
Each one of them has different ending alternatives and on top of that, the AU has a linear story.
This post will NOT be focusing on Fernator AU - instead, it will talk about the plants of the Parable and my theories about their meaning. These do influence Fernator AU as a whole but I will leave AU talk for another time if anyone would be interested. 
Instead, let’s talk about the two main inspirations for the AU: Fern and The Skip Button.
1. “STANLEY, THIS FERN WILL BE VERY IMPORTANT LATER IN THE STORY.” (Confusion, Bucket Destroyer & Figleys Endings – Fern)
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This Fern is one of the few plants in the game and the only one mentioned in dialogue. 
Its placement in the Confusion Ending is a set-up for a joke: something gets mentioned, said to have a big importance and then gets forgotten. Maybe that was its whole purpose - a gag about misplaced foreshadowing or there is more to it.
A reverse situation is the Broom Closet – it can represent the “show, not tell” rule in storytelling where an object isn’t mentioned through text but more through actions. Narrator is displeased with that and on the third reset in a row after interacting with it, the Closet gets temporarily boarded. 
That changes in the Bucket version– you can come in it as many times as you want and Narrator doesn’t get mad at Stanley (which overall is a theme in post-Skip).
So, these two are a perfect contrast:
Narrator doesn’t even mention the Broom Closet at first. However, it ends up getting new unique lines and gives long-term effects on the story (boarding the door).
The Fern gets mentioned in the story but doesn’t show up later in the ending.
However, the plant does appear in the alternative of Confusion – the Bucket Destroyer Ending.
 “We're the ones that matter Stanley! Classic characters from the first game.”
Each of the objects in this picture symbolises a person in Stanley’s life:
the Broom Closet = Player, since in the original version, if you stay longer, Narrator talks about them;
the pencil sharpener= 432 – in lore, madness through never being given a pencil to sharpen;
Stanley’s computer= Boss, due to the orders;
Wife mannequin;
Baby cut-out (might also represent Stanley’s kids);
Adventure Line ™ – it isn’t a person but is said to be conscious;
and the Fern.
(EDIT: Beau in Stanarr server also said that the mugs on the table could symbolise the Employees while the Baby could be The Essence of Divine Art. That could potentially mean that Adventure Line™ could also symbolise curiosity - just like, while TEDA seems to be a conscious being, might just be human creativity. )
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We already have the Line ™ from the Confusion Ending. Other objects could have been used for this scene but somehow, it is the Fern that ends up being showcased. It could be just due to it belonging to this pathway but it could be also something else.
“You see, your friends and I are concerned for you, Stanley.”
He could be meaning himself just as the voice – after all, the separation between him and his friends is not that uncommon. He does use the word ‘friend’ positively only in the UD version of the game. He calls Stanley his friend only once and then, proceeds to call the Bucket and Stanley friends a few times, making it obvious the man projects on that object.
Here though, Narrator is against the Bucket - so, why couldn’t he start to project on something else? That way, he could visually show the group of friends with himself. 
So you know,,, Fernator real,,, maybe,,,,,,,
(Big thanks to Chris from Crowsx3 Discord for reminding me about this next part)
I was also reminded that Fern makes one more appearance - in the Figley Ending, Confusion Ending room.
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You get to this room after a Red-Blue door choice that doesn't matter at all, leading to an open door. It perfectly blends so many parts of the game together - the choice between two pathways, the illusion of the choice and also brings something new - backtracking. In most of the game, we are unable to do so - the doors close behind us and that's it. But, just like in Confusion - Narrator wants to backtrack, to change the pathway, for one last adventure with Stanley.
Maybe that was the importance of the Fern. For it to show up when Narrator wants to do something fresh, something new, WITH Stanley.
"Oh, I want more memories, Stanley! I want to keep going!"
In the end, he wants to retire and move on. If he does and only leaves his recording, if he stays with everything TK has done - that's up to a debate for another time.
But one thing is known - we all remember the Fern, even if it doesn't heavily impact the story. Unless you know - Narrator took the form of it and then-
Ok ok, but this was the nice task – now let’s talk about The Skip Button.
2. “IT'S ALL OUT OF MY CONTROL NOW.” (Skip Button)
I will talk about the Memory Zone later – here, I want to focus solely on the Skip Button room.
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The Skip Button plant is the only thing in the Parable that shows actual ageing. Sure, there are some other symbols of time passage - i.e. clocks, and scratches on objects but nothing else shows decay besides this one single plant.
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Changes happen in Skips #5 and #6. 
In Skip #5, Narrator says it’s been a week or two. I know that people have done the math on how much time passed through each skip takes but we will base it only on the plant alone. While a week is too short for a plant like that to show signs of severe dehydration, 2 weeks is more plausible.
In Skip #6 - when he says he had stopped counting once it was over a year - the plant is dead.
Death is overall a bit of a theme in the Parable – the Countdown, Museum, Apartment and Zending especially have a lot of lines about Stanley’s death, which should cause permanent effects. Instead, the game just resets, not making any deal about it. This plant, however, does not return to its original form.
In Skip #13, concrete falls on it, leaving the plant trapped for the rest of this pathway.
I think the room overall (together with the plants and the clock) symbolises Narrator’s psyche. 
The first few Skips are alright for him - sure, the time in-between seems to grow but he still thinks it is a good idea. He starts to panic and begs Stanley not to press the button in Skip #4 and in Skip #5, both the plant changes and the lights dim down. This is when he has been left for those two weeks all for himself and just sounds so tired - and with each skip, another part of his psyche breaks.
The clock stops working and falls around #8 and #9. It’s still long since in #6, Narrator where he says he lost count but he might have just exaggerated it, only losing it in these runs.
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After such a long period in solitude, any mind would start to decay - the plant, the pipes letting the water escape through them, the fire alarm going off (since batteries are low), the walls getting destroyed with time… Together with how silent Narrator gets at times, I genuinely believe this whole section is us being in his brain.
But then in Skip #15, (after the sunlight in #14) this happens: 
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These skips are special because they are a glimpse of hope. Sunbeams, birds chirping, new life in the form of plants showing up – just for it all to disappear next Skip.
While the last time we hear Narrator talk is in #11 (The end is never), this feels like he is trying to talk to Stanley indirectly. The destruction of the ceiling feels like an attempt to break Stanley free, which, unfortunately, was a bit misplaced since we don’t have the jump option (curse you, jump circle for gatekeeping them / silly).
These can mean several things. 
Narrator hopes that the situation would soon end, as mentioned in the previous part.
It could also show that he is making new ideas and growing. I think it would be a poetic way of personal growth. It is visible in the Bucket version of the game - lack of Red-Blue doors, Countdown becoming silly birds ending, him calling Stanley his friend through the bucket - he wants to change for the better.
“You are not beyond redemption. You may change, and you may become more, so much more than you were before.”
And what better way to show that than through physical growth?
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Even if his mind, in the end, becomes the sandy landscape we all know - he had tried to get better and, in some way, succeeded. 
I sometimes wonder if the New New Content & Bucket parts of the game are what Narrator wants to turn the game into during these Skips. How he wants to acknowledge Stanley, show that he cares for him and that he matured.
But, let’s go back a bit. The New New Content happening during these skips in Narrator’s mind are a cute theory but, it’s just that - a theory.
What is real though is the game content, like the plants in the TSP 2 Expo.
3. “YES, I HAVE SOMETHING VERY EXCITING TO SHOW YOU!“ (TSP 2 Expo)
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This part alone has 4 new plants that were never seen before in the rest of the office (they later make an appearance again in the Bucket Apartment Ending).
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Three of the plants have some resemblance to the one in the Skip button - a long office plant put in a pot, while the smaller ones seem similar to the Fern.
(Small note: these plants are based on real-life ones that are common in offices and are low maintenance but I am too tired to figure out their types. Possibilities from a bud: “the first one in the basket is prob Dieffenbachia Seguine, down in middle is calathea makoyana, low right kentia palm”. )
Interestingly, the whole Expo is red-themed so, to compliment that with the opposite colour - green - could seem like it’s a bolder move. It to be fair isn’t - there are a lot of greys, whites and browns that tie everything together, not letting this become a Christmas-themed event.
Expo gives us a lot of new and fresh Narrator ideas - the Bucket, Figleys, and Infinitive Hole. I think these plants also deserve a mention - they all tie perfectly to the theme of Narrator’s growth.
He wants to be better, to please Stanley and I think, maybe, to fit in more. He could have reused the same plant from the Office but no - he made new ones.
And just like the Broom Closet - they never get acknowledged in the dialogue.
Show, not tell.
4. “AND STANLEY WAS HAPPY.” (Outdoors - Freedom Ending and Memory Zone)
Stanley felt the cold breeze, blablabla, you know the drill by now. Most of us will remember the current Freedom Ending - lots of grass, some trees, blue sky…
But that wasn’t always the case.
The 2011 Mod had a way different ending screen.
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The difference is probably due to the limitations of this being a mod but comparing it with the future renditions, it might portray how Narrator had gotten softer throughout the games.
In this one - the outside world is urban. You went out of the building you were mind controlled in into a town of some sort. It doesn’t look too appealing. Trees without any leaves, very short grass - it is SOME freedom but it feels rough. Just like the only other outdoor area in the Games Endings (more about it in the next part).
The newer versions, however, are WAY different.
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More saturated colours, some rock roads, trees, and mountains in the background - nature is ALIVE and well. Just like Stanley is, being freed, in Narrator’s eyes.
Because it is Narrator who chose to make this the end screen. It is just visible, time and time again, how much this man adores nature. Sure, he might be scared about the open world (next point, again) but he could have just remade the buildings from the original. But he chose not to - instead, upgrading it into something more beautiful.
This isn’t just an ending for Stanley - it’s an ending for HIM.
I think that’s why Memory Zone is just so similar, in my eyes, to Freedom in this aspect.
“(...) I made something special and tucked it away here where the game’s developers won’t find it.”
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Some things do not match - the tree types seem different, the sky is a different colour, and small flowers pop here and there that aren’t in Freedom.
But there is a key element that does match - mountains.
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These two areas may be connected - Memory Zone seems to be on a higher standpoint, maybe on a hill rather than a mountain but due to just that, it is possible they are both connected, just in different parts of the world.
Memory Zone is special to Narrator - it is supposed to show his achievements and happiest moments. It would make sense that it was placed in a similar area as Freedom - just hidden so that the other game developers Narrator mentions, would not influence it.
The Maintenance area of the Memory Zone, however, is everything Narrator tried to repress. That is why he might not remember the reviews in there - it’s all hidden in his subconsciousness.
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“I don’t recall this part of the Memory Zone before.”
Narrator had been probably working on the Memory Zone way before he shared it with Stanley. It was his safe space, or so he thought. The memory in the name seems to be the most important clue - it’s not like some remembering zone, history zone or something - it’s memory.
And memories like to get hazy.
As I mentioned - to me, Skip Button's room is a visual representation of Narrator’s mind, at least a part of it. And since it’s a part of this area - I headcanon the whole Memory Zone to be that.
Contrasting with the wild flora of the main Memory Zone, the maintenance seems very run down and secluded. The colours in Memory Zone are already desaturated in comparison to the rest of the game but this part looks dirty thanks to the focus on browns and greys. While some of the lovely nature is in there - birds, a big water pool, the trees are dead. 
These dead trees, just like the Skip Button tree or 2011 Freedom Ending ones might be a pattern for Narrator when he is not in his best shape.
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Once again, the game shows just how important the nature aspect seems in the key part of the story. Narrator made the conscious decision to change the Freedom Ending and probably also had some saying about the Memory Zone, until the parts he wanted to repress that got run down.
Narrator keeps on repressing things a lot throughout the game. He shows denial and shifts the blame - on Stanley, the Player or the reviewers. At the end of it all - during Skip - he finally realises his flaws and mistakes.
But that realisation happened way too late.
Maybe that’s why he later tries to separate himself from that Memory Zone, putting it in the Executive Toilet.
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Or maybe, it’s some not-so-hidden poop joke. But that’s not as important.
So let’s get to the rest of the game.
5. “THE OFFICE COULD USE A BIT OF DECORATION.” (Other plants in-game, Games Ending, Epilogue)
Besides Fern, there is another plant that keeps on being with Stanley a lot. It is there, never in the foreground but it’s always there. It’s like a hidden companion - maybe, as a symbol for not so hidden one.
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This plant shows up in most of the Left Door pathway to the Boss’s Office - 5 times in different rooms:
desks 431- 436,
desks 418-424,
left-right door choice,
Meetings Room, 
and the entrance to Boss's office.
It also shows up in rooms we see around the pathway:
room with 456, 457 doors,
413 room,
Executive Bathroom
and two in the room with Elevator Music.
The plant shows up 4 times in Confusion Ending (including the earlier mentioned 456, 457 area)- and thinking how the Fern is also there makes me just feral. Narrator joins Stanley on his little adventure through the unknown territory - so he inserts himself in the story.
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In the Right door pathway, we get through the first 3 from the Left door and 2 more - the Loungue and the Games Ending.
The Games Ending has very different alternations between the game version but one thing is stable - nature in the open words games.
“I wonder what he found.”
In 2011, once again, nature is quite dead and dried up. RIP all the plants in this version of the game.
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The next alternations, however, take a different approach and make the plants more alive.
The 2013 version uses Minecraft as it outdoor area.
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Narrator doesn’t focus at all on the nature aspect - more on the crafting one which is fair, he is a storyteller and a game designer.
In Ultra Deluxe, there are two areas - Rocket League and Firewatch.
Rocket League won’t get that much attention from me - it’s just a typical grass for sports fields. The Firewatch, however, is a direct parallel with Minecraft. And it’s due to it being open-world.
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This brings me to the last issue with Narrator and nature - he likes it quite a lot, but it HAS to be limited for Stanley.
Freedom makes you stuck in a cutscene, you can only go to mines in Minecraft due to no jumps, Memozy Zone has barriers, so Stanley has one path to follow, and most plants are potted- expect, for one thing.
And it’s the plants that show up in Skip #15.
I think it’s no coincidence that in the Bucket runs, the Red-Blue choice is off-limits. I think it’s due Narrator not wanting to go through things that hurt. But they hurt not only him - they also hurt Stanley.
We could focus on the fact that each of the Games runs ends up with Stanley being trapped in the 2011 version. But I think that lack of freedom to explore beyond the main area - the set path, the game, is what got Narrator more, in the end. Maybe he is scared about full freedom and lack of full control over the story and Stanley.
And maybe that’s why the Epilogue seems to be a never-ending desert. It’s Narrator’s last attempt to give Stanley the true freedom they both needed.
“An epilogue would be fun. Wouldn’t it, Stanley?”
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(Shoutout to a Rammy who gave me the idea to talk about this screenshot.)
The desert, for me, fits the Sandman story (no, not just the song though now it is playing in my head so I hope it will play in yours, too). It shows up at the end of the Skip run and just like the room itself, I think it keeps on symbolising Narrator’s mind.
Once a mindflow, where his thoughts could drift anywhere they pleased became quite stagnant. He fell in hibernation or the mind was just no longer there.
The Sandman brought him the sand and let him rest, cope with the near eternity of solitude.
And to think, during it, Stanley uses wood he finds in this place to bring some light. Lighting up the neurons that still are active.
And this one last time a plant in any shape is present - it is there to serve Stanley.
Narrator, I see you. You probably never left because you are unable to but, you still care about Stanley.
And we care about you.
6. CONCLUSIONS
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(painting in the background: The fairy grotto, 1867)
I could mention EVERY single plant in-game: all the nature paintings, plants in Demo and all the Infinitive Hole nature backgrounds, apple in Pink room, try to get through every plant and try to find its significance but at the end of the day- this whole thing is over 3k words IOSFAIHOSAFHIOFSA
I know this post didn’t talk much about Fernator. I could talk about how Narrator’s need for control and being in a confined space makes him want to be in a Bucket that he also projects a lot onto. How plants often symbolise his psyche, show up in important parts of the office and as the only other visible living being besides Other Stanley and Mariella, maybe, just maybe, Narrator, who seems to not be human, might have decided to take such form, for comfort and safety. But I will leave that for another time.
So if you reached this point, I hope you realise that Fernator AU is a superior AU to the point it’s canon /silly/nsrs /j (,,,, or is it / silly)
If you are reading this - thank you so much for reading this ramble or just skimming through it. I do appreciate you.
Thank you and-
“I'm out... I'm out... I'm done! It's over! Thank you for playing! Your input was extremely valuable.”
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