#tabloid ask

[themosthatedbeingg]

“Mister Morningstar! Rep Orter with Hellfire news daily! Is it true you can’t shower with a special rubber ducky? Is it true its name is colonel Quacks? Your people are waiting with bated breath to hear your answer!”

“.. his name is Sir quackenton actually and he’s a retired dictator of Nicaragua but now he’s my waterproof Bluetooth speaker !”

[untitledrockstar-if]

wait omg what kind of. crimes. can/does mc commit (if they crash out)

i love this & all my mcs WILL be crashing out❤️

I have a full on meltdown planned but there'll be smashing of R's guitars (even the ones from their idols), driving their latest car into the statue in the driveway of mc and R, burning their favorite leather jacket in the backyard, smashing their gold and platinum records, clawing out the faces of R's record covers hanging in the hallway and taking the golf clubs their dad got them to go to town on their recording booth. then the neighbour's call the cops. AND THEN mc gets their mugshot taken.

[vapolis]

It would be so funny if we could date *another* celebrity - like- the DRAMA

yeah, that's an option as well

[latenightsundayblues]

I live for your amazing drawings of Stu and Billy in the slasher band au looking foward for more!! 🌸

Aww thank you😭😭im usually a bit embarrassed of posting too much AU stuff but i made a little something for you!

It's them during one of their photoshoots. Stu always takes the opportunity to whisper insults about Billy's emo boy ways without immediate retaliation.

[sipthegossip-if]

Guys, I am writing the prologue rn and I am having a BLAST. This shit is actually so fun. 😭

[rwby-confess]

Confession #411

[quanblovk]

washed up child actor Marx my… uh… beloved?

💔💔 From most beloved child prankster to most scandalous cyncial drug addict /j

[figure-frenzy]

[dreamings-free]

Shitty press as usual from the daily mail and daily telegraph sigh. At least the headlines. Didn't bother reading any further.

well they’re tabloids and that’s what tabloids do I don’t know how this fandom still after all these years expect anything else from those trash rags ?!!

and yea good don’t read it. because every time you do every click every engagement gives money to these vultures so they can keep writing their hateful racist xenophobic anti-social sensationalist bullsh*t. tabloids are not just harmless gossip rags writing shit about your fave celebs they are trash that influence politics that enable things like brexit anti-immigration and hate against muslims. and when you give them ad revenue you help further their damaging agenda.

every time I see someone on here the post a link to the sun I wanna pull my hair out.

[stackthedeck]

writing fanfic is wild because you're like tehe I'm going to put my favorite guy in a completely random situation like shopping for groceries and worrying about his legal right to get married in the future... and it's like...huh wonder why I did that

[themosthatedbeingg]

"Your royal majesty! 666 News, here. Can you answer why a particular part of hell always gets destroyed on your outings?"

“Oh you guys rebuilt already ? Ah I should have destroyed you better— er I mean how nice to see you up and Adam again ~ , as to your question this is Hell in case you didn’t notice most of it is on fire constantly just the hazards of being here now I’m kinda busy so go away before I show you exactly what happened to your old news anchors~”

[untitledrockstar-if]

hiii! i'm really looking forward to this if, i love angst and suffering so muc!! i was wondering tho can we expose R/ruin their career and still be with them or would they not want mc at all at that point? also will R emotionally cheat on the mc or just physically? thanks if you answer!

there's not much to expose about R truthfully. most of their issues are public knowledge and while leaking that they're cheating would surprise some, most expect them to sleep around.

mc can do very little to damage R's career more but they will also reach a point where they no longer want mc around (which we will explore).

the cheating is just about the sex for them. they love mc and that's all they need emotions wise.

have a good day!

[mischas]

were mischa and lindsay friends? they were both it girls at the same time

Not really but they were friendly enough (though I think MB would deny even that). There were a lot of industry machinations pitting them against one another at the time which sucks but is unsurprising. LL apparently popped up at MB's 18th birthday party in January 2004 which is cute. I do think they were in the same clubs for a couple of years but I doubt either of them would ever say they were legit friends.

[blorbocedes]

After a beloved mutual (and popular blog on f1mblr) was caught sending herself really disgusting hate messages to feed a narrative nothing else can surprise me

omg how did they get caught 👀 did people like analyse the pattern of how anon typed and OP typed... 🕵️‍♀️

[bluebellwrenart]

Tabloid x Avril height difference breathe if you agree

[anchorandrope]

Louis would be useless and do nothing, we’d die quickly after he tried to catch a fish with his hands or a homemade spear or something. Liam would try hard but not know what to do, he’d be good at like breaking rocks or collecting firewood that we wouldn’t know how to light without matches. (Btw I am not expecting that I’m bringing much to the table here because I’m not outdoorsy, this ain’t all on them). Niall again would do nothing helpful. I feel like he’d want to write “help” in big letters with seashells on the beach and hope to be saved that way (does this show take place near a beach? I assume it does I’ve never seen it). Harry, again, he’s picking poisoned plants. He thinks he can identify mushrooms but he cannot. He will catch a frog and it will be poisonous. Useless for survival however charming company before we die. It really would have to be Zayn. He’s my only hope. He was strong enough to walk away from 1D to live on a farm and raise animals as well as a child and grow a vegetable garden. He once saved Harry from fire onstage and also stopped him from eating a muffin thrown onstage by a fan, he has some sense of survival in him. But again, I assume we die with any of them. And I am scared of insects, the wild (I am a city girl), wild animals and having to fend for myself in the dark overnight so chances are I die from sleep deprivation after 140 hours awake in a row under extreme misery and duress. They can eat my body to survive if they want as long as they promise to record one more song as 1D and dedicate it to my memory. This is how I think Naked and Afraid would go, the one direction edition.

[related to this post]

"He once saved Harry from fire onstage and also stopped him from eating a muffin thrown onstage by a fan, he has some sense of survival in him. But again, I assume we die with any of them."

— wise words from an anonymous tumblr user

you are so real for this one, and the "HELP" sign from niall is so niall 😭 i still feel zayn has survival instinct but he has no idea how to use it. and regarding a song in memory of them eating you: well we do have no control that is a song of eating someone... but in a different way... maybe they can dedicate that one to you for a night! what do you think? 👀😅

taste on my tongue 🎶 (he's eating you) i don't wanna wash away the night before 🎶 (you were his dinner) in the heat where you lay 🎶 (he grilled you) i could stay right here and burn in it all day 🎶 (he saved a bit of you for later)