#swift oc
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sssatrn · 10 months ago
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more stuff from solar MVs.
posted the old phi piano gif again so i could put it next to the related neptune one LMAO.
ok, back to the art mines. o7
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enyasaints · 14 days ago
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The manifestations of Diabetic Neuropathy (Need a wheelchair)
https://gofund.me/c347d35f
Hello friends I’m Enya and I was diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes in 2015. Unfortunately I have been losing the battle of my mobility for some time. It has come to the point I struggle to walk even short distances without severe sharp radiating pains. I also experiencing these painful sensations in my right arm. I am asking the community today to help me purchase a motorized wheelchair to not only greatly improve my quality of life but also help regain some sense of my independence. I would be eternally grateful and deeply indebted to anyone who could contribute finacially and or take the time to share and help me reach my goal
For direct Aid:
Venmo: Enyasaint
CA: $Enyasaint
$62/$2600
https://gofund.me/c347d35f
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myladysapphire · 5 months ago
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You belong with me
you and jace were childhood friends, you never left eachothers side growing up, but that all changed once you both went off to university.
CW: MDI, 18+, smut, p in v, oral (f receiving), fingering, angst, jealousy, unrequited love (kinda), love confessions, not proofread!
word count: 5,896
modern Jace x fem!reader
Masterlist
a/n based of taylor swifts you belong with me, lyrics and music video.i also have very little knowledge of american uni or football, but i tried my best though!
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You and Jace had grown up, side by side. Your mothers had been the best of friends, and so naturally you both were also. For your entire lives you knew everything about each other, your traits your habits, you knew each other better than you knew yourselves. You made every decision together, especially the decision to go to Dragonstone university together.
And that decision changed everything.
It wasn’t a surprise that Jace became so popular, he always had been. Always so able to draw a crowd and make friends in any situation.
And you, you had always been one to take a backseat. Happy in the friends you had, and never one to put yourself out there as he did.
And sadly, that seemed to be your first mistake.
He had joined the football team, finding new friends and a new crowd quickly.
You stuck to your old friends. Making small efforts to know the endless crowds of people at university.
And so, he and you started to spend less time together, and more and more time apart.
And then he got a girlfriend.
Sara Snow.
The cheer captain.
And the sister of his new best friend, Cregan Stark.
And suddenly you weren’t apart of his life anymore. You had found out he had a girlfriend from sitting on the bleachers at one of his games and seeing her run towards him and shove her tongue down his throat.
As time went on, your texts to one another became less and less, your replies delayed, and sporadic, and his ever more so.
Your study sessions stop, nights in together became nights in apart.
It hurt, you had loved him for so long, as a friend and a lover. Not that he knew. All you could do no was stare in envy as you lost your best friend and never even got a chance to say goodbye.
That year was a strange one, you now watched each other from the outskirts, you didn’t know each other every thought or where they were at all times.
Ther person you looked to in every room, no longer there, no longer was he the person you would text at every opportunity, or share looks as you reacted to what other people were saying.
Now you only knew each other in passing, a few texts here and there, mostly about your course, or if you were going home for summer or the weekend.
And when you both were home, it was so different. Once you would spend all day together, planning your days with each other. And now, you may sit in the same room, but little more than small smiles and small talk was shared between you.
And the few times you did feel you could talk to him; he would be, interrupted by his new friends coming to whisk him away.
The last three years you started to get used to not having Jace as a constant presence, instead you found great comfort in your other friends, you had always been close to them, and apart of you was grateful as you began to realise the love of female friendships, rather than just the love of Jacearys Strong.
It was Friday, the week before the big football game. The game everyone talked nonstop about, even Jace, as he had messaged you asking if you were coming to the game.
You had yet to respond.
Once you were his biggest cheerleader, sitting on the bleachers shouting his name. Now you no longer cheered his name, though you always sent him a kind smile when he did look for you in the crowd.
But unlike before you no longer went to every game, and as time went on you went to less and less.
 “Are you going to the game on Friday?” Maris asked. You were all sat in a private study room, preparing for your midterms.
You shrugged “maybe, I’m not sure yet”
“of course, we all are! It’s the big game, everyone’s talked about it nonstop!” Baela said beside you, “and I also don’t want to miss watching Cregan stark all hot and sweaty, now would I?” she said with a laugh, she and him had been casually hooking up for a past year, and with the way he looked at her she was sure they were soon to become more.
You laughed, “perhaps for you maybe, not that I have anyone worth ogling over”.
“Sure, you don’t” Heleana giggled from the other side of the table “poor Jacey would miss you terribly if you don’t go”.
“Oh please, he wouldn’t care if I was there or not” you rolled your eyes.
“Oh? Aside from his on again off again weird little thing with Sara Snow, Jace is, besotted with you!” Maris interjected.
“she’s not wrong” Rhaena spoke,
“Really?” you shook your head, “perhaps once, but he rarely speaks more than a few words to me anymore”.
“Perhaps that’s because he realised how hot you are” Baela said, sending you a wink.
“Oh gods, do you remember the look on his face when you slept with Justin Lannister in our first year” Maris laughed, “he looked like a kicked puppy!”
“Especially when he saw the hickey he had left” Heleana added.
You shook your head “I think he was more disgusted with the fact I slept with Justin than anything else”.
“hmm” Rhaena hummed, “and when you and Aemond dated in high school, what about then?”
“Oh gods, don’t bring that up” Heleana grumbled, “it still brings me nightmares, from when I walked in- “she fakes gagged at the memory.
“Okay stop it, I think you’ve all proved your point!” you sighed, “maybe once he had a crush on me, but not anymore!”
They all shared a look.
“And what about your crush on him?”
“What crush?” you said defensively.
They all laughed.
You stood up dramatic, gathering your books, “if I go to the game will you all shut up?”
“We make no promises!” Maris said, laughing once more.
“Ughh, I don’t know why I put up with you lot” you grumbled, as you went to leave.
“Because you love us” Heleana, answered.
“And Jacey too” Baela added.
you rolled your eyes as you left, heading home for the weekend.
You returned home often, your mother was all alone with out you there, though you did often find Rhaenyra, Jace’s mother, in her company. You loved seeing them both, finding Rhaenrya presence to be as much as a comfort as your own mothers.
Its one of the reasons your friendship with Jace fading into what it was now, hurt so much.
Before you had practically lived at Jace’s house growing up and now you rarely went over there, despite living next door, your bedroom windows facing one another. It hurt, seeing the life you knew suddenly disappear. To spend the summers in your own home, having your friends come to yours rather than to his, especially when you could see him on his bed, and you on yours.
He had changed, though not so much that he seemed a stranger to you, though his company was certainly strange. He knows hung out around Aegon a lot more, though he had once avoided him as often as he could. You were glad he had yet to adopt Aegon’s personality, the self-entitlement mixed with the self-loathing. Jace remained kind, his gaze often on yours whenever you were in the same room together. Something you had heard Aegon mock on several occasions.
As you walked into your house, the taste of cinnamon and sound of laughter flooded your senses. It was no surprise to see your mother in the kitchen, and even less of a surprise to see Rhaenyra with her, a smile graced your face as you approached the pair.
“mama” you greeted, “Nyra”.
“Oh darling, I didn’t know you were coming home!” your mother greeted, pulling you into a hug.
“I came home to study, I couldn’t focus with all the football stuff going on” you sighed, dumping your bag on the kitchen table.
Rhaenyra laughed, “yes Jace has talked nonstop about the football” she then looked at you with a sad look, “are you planning to go?”
“I’m not sure yet” you replied, stealing one of your mother’s cinnamon rolls from the counter.
“I’m sure Jace wants you there, he misses your rituals you know” Nyra spoke, coming to sit down at the table you now sat at.
“He does?” you did too, he was the reason you got into football in the first place and watching him without your rituals or watching games without Jace’s constant commentary.
“I know he does” she smiled, reaching for your hand, as your mother moved towards to the table.
“Believe it or not, darling, he talks about you often” she gave you a teasing look.
You shook your head, “if only he talked to me and not about me more” moving to stand up and head for your room.
“He said he was coming back this week, perhaps he will” Nyra called out as you started to walk up the stairs.
As you lay on your bed, your eyes moving to investigate Jace’s room. You laid there for a while, hoping they would open.
And they did. He had clearly just returned home just like yourself, his face tired, as he moved to sit on his bed, his face downcast, no smile in sight.         
You moved to sit up, and as you did, he saw you, a small smile gracing his face.
He sent you a small shy wave, and for a moment you felt as if you and he were back to normal.
But then his smile disappeared as his phone rang.
She tried to not watch as he argued with someone, his girlfriend you assumed. They always argued, she was always upset about something he had said, she never got his humour, not like you once did.
You couldn’t think of anything they truly had in common, then again you didn’t know either of them, not anymore.
On paper It made sense them being together, she was cheer captain and he on the football team, whilst you, you were on the bleachers, watching the game and waiting for his victory, whilst she would cheer him on, in his direct view. Ever the supporting act, and you the extra.
Before Uni, you and been his biggest and though you still supported him, it hurt a little seeing her cheer his name, especially since you never knew if they were off or on again until her, she shoved her tongue down his throat.
You and he used to have a ritual before each game. the day before you would always bunk of school, and he would always somehow convince you to join him on his run, you would run side by side, your phones listening to same playlist. (You and he had always had the exact same music taste, music she didn’t like, if the  though few parties hosted by his frat and her sorority were anything to go off of)Then you would spend the night staying up and watching the same three movies, before falling into a sugar induced coma only to be woken up by Nyra and Luke aggressively shilling you both awake screaming that your going to be late, and when you did finally wake up Jace would always force you both to take an ice bath, claiming it to be a good way to wake you up. You never believed him, and it would take him pulling you into the water with him for you to join him.
You would be there for every game and event, cheering from the bleachers.
And now as you watched him arguing with his girlfriend, you wished you knew what they were saying, there issues. A part of you regretted not trying harder to stay friends with him, even though it was him who moved away from you, not you away from him.
You reached down under your bed, trying to find the old sketchbook you used to use to talk to Jace before you both had phones.
You didn’t have his number anymore, having deleted it off your phone, though you remembered it off by heart, a part, something you could never bring yourself to forget it.
You didn’t want to text him, it didn’t feel right, you are reaching out first almost didn’t feel right either but eh looked hurt and you deep down still cared.
Finding a pen you quickly wrote, “you, okay?” Finding a pen you quickly wrote, “are you okay?”
He had sat down on his bed, head in his hands before looking up to see you turn the paper around.
A smile graced his face as he shrugged and reached for his own sketchbook and pen.
“Tired of drama” he wrote.
You laughed a little at his message, writing “sorry” with a sad face beside it, shrugging as you turned the paper around
And he shook his head, moving to stand up as you went to write something else, only for him to shut his curtain before he could see what you wrote. 
You shrugged of his easy dismissal, and how so few words were exchanged before he decided to end the conversation.
You had finished you studying, content and ready for your exams, so blasting your music on full volume you started to dance around your room.
Unbeknownst to you, he watched you dance, a smile pulling at his face as he realised you were the same as always. You danced like no one was watching singing along to the songs as you did. And he smiled, laughing at your antics as he remembered how you used to pull him up and dance with you.
He regretted how he ended his friendship with abandoning you, he wasn’t even sure why he did it. He knew he hurt you. He feltBu, for his own selfish somehow, he had made gain. He had made new friends; he, he was popular and on the uni football team. He liked the spotlight always had and was half to have all these new friends. He had made a great bond with but in doing so he lost his truest friend and the woman he loved.
He had decided to talk to you, to apologise and make up for what he did. So, as he saw you at outside the bench outside both your houses he came over and sat beside you. So, as he saw yous at outside the bench outside both your houses he came over and say beside you.
“hey” you heard a voice say beside you, as you turned your head to see Jace sit beside you.
“hey” you said back, as your hair falling in front of your face. He reached his hand forward, to brush the hair out of your eyes, and tucking it behind your ear.
 “How have you been?” he asked, his hand lingering slightly. You stared at him fro a moment, he still dressed the same, with the same worn-out jeans, the same smile, but with better hair.
You supposed you looked entirely different, though at the same time you hadn’t changed either. Your curled hair was no longer a frizzy messed, but well maintained. You didn’t wear your glasses much anymore, now favouring contacts. He seemed to smile as he took you in, staring at your eyes.
“I’m good, you?”
“Good, excited for the game…” he kept talking and it felt like old times again, you thought, it was so easy, to return to how it once was, chatting about nothing in particular.
He smiled as he spoke to you, happily chatting away. His smile was the same as always, a smile you sworn could light up a town.
“I haven’t seen you in a while” you said after a pause.
“yeah” he said awkwardly, scratching his head “I’m sorry about that, I never meant to- “a car pulled up, with Sara Snow in it.
He got up suddenly, mumbling goodbye as he did. His smile had faded, and turned into a forced smile, the kind of smile you gave to a stranger you passed in the hallway, as he got into her car. She instantly pulled him in for a kiss, her eyes staring you down as she did.
You had never actually talked to her before, never known anyone who had, but you did know Cregan, though not well, and he rarely said anything nice about his sister.
They drove away after that, Jace looking at you over his shoulder as they did.
The rest of the day you kept too yourself, focusing on studying. Jace had yet to return home, the light off in his room. Not that you were checking.
He had sent you a text, “sorry”, nothing more. You hadn’t replied, you didn’t even know what to say.
From the corner of your eye, you saw the light in his room turn on.
He walked in with a downtrodden look. He had spent the whole day with her and felt only regret on not spending it with you.
He and sara were on and off again, never anything serious, no feelings past lust. Especially after how she talked about you today. He ended it officially, and he couldn’t be happier. Especially when he saw yous at at your bed.
He reached under his bed for his sketchbook, reminiscing on how even as children you couldn’t spend an hour with out talking to one another.
It had all changed after uni, and he regretted not dragging you with him as he changed.
“hey” he wrote holding it up hoping you would look, and as luck would have it you did.
You seemed unsure as you yourself grabbed your own sketchbook, writing the words.
“what’s up?”
“I wanted to see if you were okay”.
You furrowed your brows “yeah?”
He sent you a small smile, before grabbing his phone and calling you.
“Hey?” you answered, your tone nervous.
“Hey!” he said trying to lighten your mood a little, “i’m sorry about earlier it won’t happen again”.
Yous kissed your teeth nodding your head, “right” his actions early hadn’t supposed you, they only made you realise that you and he won’t ever return to how you were before. Choosing each other first always, and never up and leaving each other mid conversation.
“I…. i broke up with her, officially”.
You hummed, he nervously coughed.
“I I know I hurt you when I started dating her, and i…I am so sorry, I just got so caught up in the idea of it all, these…these past few years have been a torment to me, watching as you seemed perfectly okay with us not…not being us anymore and I didn’t know how to…how to talk to you or-“
“i wasn’t perfectly okay with it” you interrupted him “at not point was I okay with loosing my best friend” you shook your head, glaring at him through the window “I tried to talk to you  and you shook me off, you chose her over an 18  year long friendship, how would I be okay with It!”
“I didn’t!” he said quickly, his face panicked, “I-I I messaged you I swear I did I sent you so many messages and you never replied”.
“No, you didn’t, I get the odd one but the second is as her shove her tongue down your throat I haven’t received these “many messages” you claim to have sent”.
“what?” he looked shocked through the window, “I told you about her, how I got drunk and slept with her at a party and how she wouldn’t take no as an answer, you never replied, I sent you countless texts about going to study together or hanging out and you never showed up!”
“What! You never showed up when I asked you!” you were near shouting now.
“You never asked me- “
“Neither did you!”
You heard your mum call you are asking if you were okay. You went silent, “we can’t do this over the phone”.
“Meet me at the backdoor” you looked at him nodding your head.
“hey” you said as Jace opened his back door, pulling it closed behind him.
“hey” he said moving towards you, “look, clearly there was some reason we never got these texts”.
You looked at him in disbelief, shaking your head, “gods Jace I didn’t realise you were so blind!” you laughed, “look I don’t know her or anything about her but, are you sure Sara never used your phone and maybe deleted the messages?”
“Umm…no?” he said unsure, “why would she do that”.
“Oh, please Jace, you and I have known each other our whole lives, and when we first started uni, we were acting like a married couple, she probably wanted me out the way so she could date you”.
“But we weren’t…we’ve never- “he stuttered awkwardly.
“Have you never once thought of me-?”
He cut you off, “no!” he said it too fast, so fast that you were unsure if he meant it.
“Really? Because I have, I did” you replied, sending him a shy look. You had hopped he had to and that you are saying this would make him say it in return.
He looked at you shocked, not expecting your admission, then his face turned guilty.  “I know” he said looking down, “but at the time I- I saw you nothing more than a…a friend and so I…I dated Sara to push you away in hope you would stop seeing me as more than a friend.” He scratched his head awkwardly, looking down his eyes filled with guilt.
 “oh” that’s all you could say. It was the first time you had ever admitted you had actually liked him, and to be rejected so clearly. To know the reason why he was with Sara, the reason he was with her in the first place was to get rid of you, it hurt more than three years of only passing words and fading friendship.
“I. I’m sorry I… I broke up with her though”.
You laughed a humourless laugh, almost in disbelief “I well that makes what you said better” you scoffed, truing around to leave.
He grabbed your arm, “No…I” he whispered your name, “I… I do like you like that… I’m just before her id dint realise my feelings for you and I do know…”
You scoffed, “right… so it took fucking another woman and ignoring me for three years, to save me from my feeling, made you realise you liked me to?”
“Yes.” He nodded.
You laughed, a short scoff of a laugh, “by the gods Jace you’re an idiot” this time when he grabbed your arm as you went to leave you only shook him off, storming up to your room and leaving the curtains shut for the rest of the weekend.
That week you swear you saw Jace everywhere. He seemed to follow you almost.
Though you were both doing the same course, meaning 90% of your lectures were together.
“Why is Jace following you?” Maris asked as you both walked out of your seminar.
“Oh gods, I haven’t told you, have I?”
She laughed, intrigued, “no, what happened”.
You looked down laughing as you tried to tell her, “Well Jace and I finally talked and he… admitted he liked me?”
“What!”
“that’s not it… but he also told me that he knew I liked him and that was the reason he started dating Sara… so I would stop liking him”.
“What the hells?” Baela said as she caught up to the pair of you, “did I just hear that right”.
“don’t even get me started! But I basically told him he was an idiot; I mean who hurts someone like that!”
“Idiots!” Maris and Baela said simultaneously.
And as they did you saw Jace appear from around the corner, two coffees in hand. He had a hopeful look in his eyes as he walked towards you.
“Speak of the devil” you mumbled, as you turned to your friends, “I’ll be back in a minute” you said as you walked towards him.
“Jace” you greeted. “What do you want now?”
“To apologise” he said handing you a coffee, “I really am sorry, I never should have done what I did, and I should have told you, and not kept it from you.” He looked at you, his face kin to puppy scrounging for food.
“Then why did you?” You said as you ushered him to an empty room.
“I was scared. “He admitted, smiling shyly, “all my life I had loved you and everyone told me you did too, and then. then you and Aemond started dating and I thought they all were lying to me and how could you ever love me and when you could be with him”
In truth it took you until after your relationship with Aemond to realise your feelings for Jace, in fact it was Aemond who broke up with you because he saw said feelings first.
He continued. “And then you broke up and everyone was telling me to take a chance, and then uni started, and I got scared and realised that you did I fact like me too. But for some reason I was convinced that being in a relationship in uni would only tear us apart. So… so I decided to take a step back and stop whatever romantic feelings we had- “
“That wasn’t your choice to make Jace, maybe for yourself but my own feelings? You had no right!”
“I know… I know. I was- I am an idiot and…I’m sorry, truly.”
You sighed, you could see he was really sorry, and yet an apart of you didn’t want to forgive him. But another part of you wanted to jump into his arms and forgive him.
“I want us to be friends.” He said, with a hopeful gaze. And your heart broke all other again.
“no” you stepped back, “you know of my feelings, and… I-I can’t be your friend, I can’t ignore those feelings, I won’t, I can’t” tears welled in your eyes at the look on his face.
“I don’t know if I can give you what you want.”
“Why not?”
“Because I have loved you my whole life, and I have already screwed that up, I can’t risk whatever we have now for a relationship.” “we have nothing, we are not friends, not lovers, nothing. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain”.
“No, I have everything to lose, I have already lost your friendship, I can’t risk breaking your heart and loosing you forever!”
“So, because you’re afraid of the possibility of us breaking up you won’t try?” you shook your head, “I can’t believe you! I don’t understand what you want! And you clearly don’t see what I want either!” you went to leave, “I can’t anymore Jace, I just want, I can’t look at you without my heartbreaking. You broke my heart and our friendship once before because you feared losing me forever, well know I think you might have lost me anyway.”
You left without another word or a single glance.
The week passed slowly, your friends were a great comfort and your exams seemed to breeze past you, but the nagging in your back of your mind was constant.
The regret and want. The want to see Jace, to take back what you said and make him realise what an idiot he was. And the regret from not grabbing his face and kissing him.
You and he had been each other’s first kiss, using the excuse of ‘practice’ to cover up you real feelings. It had been awkward, with nose and teeth clashing, and then before you knew it the kisses became perfect, casual even. You had both been sure it was the start of something. And then you ruined it by saying yes when Aemond asked you on a date. You never regretted dating him, he was your first love, your first everything. But not your first kiss. He made you realise what love was and that it was what you had with Jace all along.
Then University started, you lived in the same halls, saw each other every moment of everyday, cooking together, studying together. And then the casual kissing came back. Sweet kisses goodbye or good morning. And then one day you had lingered, and he had pushed back. Your daily routine faded, and then it all happened. The football team and Sara Snow.
It would of been better had he just stopped kissing you, stopped initiating the kisses. Instead, he left you, and now you had done the same to him.
And yet here you stood, getting ready for the big football game, with all your friends.
You wore a jersey, his. The day he got on the team he had gotten you both a jersey. It had sat unworn in a box under your bed since then. It fit perfectly, his name written in bold on the back, alongside his lucky number. The number you had picked, the number that was conveniently todays date.
You stared into the mirror taking a deep breath as your friends all readied themselves. You weren’t sure exactly what you planned to do, but either way Jace would regret ever saying no to dating you.
Everyone was at the game, including the entirety of Jace’s family, you found yourself sat next to Rhaenrya and Luke. You sat right at the front, practically, on the field, meaning Jace could see you, and more importantly you in his jersey. They had all taken notice of your jersey, with Harwin sending you a teasing look.
It was loud and chaotic, the entirety of the university at the event and for good cause as Jace’s team had won.
You hadn’t really paid any attention, your eyes solely focused of Jace.  
He made eye contact with you, solely you and came rushing forward. You stood up moving yourself and before you knew it, he had sweeped you up into is arms. Spinning you around, he whispered like a chant “I’m so sorry, I regret everything I never should have- “
You shut him up, taking his mouth with yours in a slow passionate kiss. Moaning into each other’s mouths, you realised you both had got on lost in the crowd, as everyone had run into the field. Leaving you to find a moment alone, to finally reconnect and admit your feelings.
“Come with me” he said grabbing your hand, leading you away from the crowd and field.
“I’ve never taken anyone here before” he said once you finally reached your destination, it was a sweet little outlook with a view of the island. “The day I found it I wanted to save it, for you”.
You looked at each other, hands entwined.
“I love you” you both said in unison, bringing a smile to each of your faces.  
“I am so sorry about everything, I don’t know why I said what I did, why I asked to be friends and nothing more. I’m a fool”
“You’re my fool” you laughed, “in fact were both fools, I don’t know why we kept this from each other for 21 years. “You laughed, before reaching forward and kissing him again.
It was so different from your years of practice kisses. They were deliberate and sweet. This was hot, passionate and desperate.
“Gods, I need you” he moaned into your mouth, as he backed you up onto a tree, his hands descending to your waist, pulling you closer to him. Your bodies stating to slowly grind against one another as your tongues battled for dominance, his eventually winning, as he took you in for one last heated kiss before his lips began deciding down your neck.
“Please.” You begged, as you reached down to pull of his jersey, you wore nothing underneath, your bare breasts on show.
He moaned at the sight of them, before taking your nipple into his mouth, licking and sucking as he did. Low moans spilling out of you as he did.  You gripped his hair as he continued his ministrations, before pulling him of your breast and reaching up to undress him. Soon you were both bare, if anyone was to walk by, they would easily you, but neither of you seemed to care as Jace moved to kiss you again his hand reaching down to caress your wet cunt, shuddering as he penetrated your hole.
As he continued to pump his fingers in and out of you, your moans swallowed by his mouth as you felt yourself tighten around his fingers your peak edging closer and closer, before he withdrew his fingers causing a moan of protest as his fingers left you.
“Keep going” you pleaded, but he simply shook his head, before going on his knees, your leg moving o his shoulder as he licked your cunt. He lapped you up like he was dying, and you were his final meal. Licking up all your juices before finally reaching your clit, his fingers hand made there way back to your cunt, as you felt his finger penetrate you once more as he sucked your clit into his mouth.
You moaned loudly as he did so, making no effort to hide your pleasure, as you gripped his hair and started to ride his face until you finally came.
he stood up slowly, before once again pulling you into heated kiss.
“You taste divine” he moaned into your mouth, before groaning as you reached for his cock. “jump” he groaned, and as you allowing him to thrust, into you in one slick movement as you wrapped your legs around his waist, causing you both to moan simultaneously, as your walls wrapped around his length tightly, he didn’t move for a moment, allowing you both to adjust before he started to pump his hips slowly into you, building up a rhyme.
“Gods you moaned,” gripping onto him tightly, as he started to pound into you, you both moaning as his pace picked up.
His face was buried in your neck, leaving kisses you where sure would leave a mark.
He continued to thrust his hips, pounding into you as your peaks grew closer and closer, his cock throbbing inside you as your cunt tightened around his length.
“I’m going to cum” he whined. “Fuck, where?” he asked, reaching down to rub your clit, prompting you closer and closer to Cumming with him.
“Inside…I’m on the pill” you said between moans and before you knew it you felt the warmness of him spreads inside you as you came yourself, gripping tightly on his arms as you did.
You took a moment, leaning against, him and him you.
“Why did we wait so long to do this again?” he asked catching his breath.
“Because you’re an idiot”.
He laughed, “and I will spend every day making it up to you I swear” he kissed you softly, as if sealing his promise in a kiss, a promise you knew he would keep “I should have known, you belong with me”.
taglist
@apollonshootafar @flrboyd @theanxietyqueen17 @dark-night-sky-99 @zillahvathek @leavesmealobe @winter-soldier-101 @bunbunbl0gs @ka1afbr @tesha-i-guess @aemondwhoresworld @RAYNETARGARYEN2 @cloboboo @now-i-have-a-new-obsession
to be added to taglist
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cherriielle · 4 months ago
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summer/fall cards 📷✨
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domesticfanfic · 7 months ago
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Taylor Swift at 2am:
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mimimar · 7 months ago
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finally completed my comic based on the song ivy by taylor swift!✿ please zoom in to read the text and see the details~
✿.✿.✿
you can get the digital zine pdf here! it includes extras like character profiles, costume design, more art of willow and ivy, zine-exclusive sketches and an illustrated guide to the symbolism of all the flowers in this comic.
you can also get prints of individual pages here!
✿.✿.✿
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deadirlshwriters · 7 months ago
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you wouldn't last an hour in the asylum where they raised me.
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wasteland-wrecker · 3 months ago
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TW: blood - Nuka World dlc spoilers
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Toby was not prepared for the Gauntlet at all.
When he ran into Harvey, he hadn’t expected anything like that.
He could have turned back before getting on the monorail, but after the destruction of the Institute he felt lost, overwhelmed by a sense of inertia, of passivity.
He had only brought a few grenades and Kellogg’s gun. He hadn’t even bothered to wear any armor, just a shabby road leather outfit.
And then, Nuka World? Fuck, he had yet to see it.
After realizing he had walked into a trap, Toby wasn’t surprised at all.
Just another group of radiers who think they’re dealing with the last of idiots, he thought.
The Gauntlet certainly put him to the test. Whoever created that game had some time to waste.
The hardest part of it was the final one, the fight with the raiders and the walk through hand grenades hanging from wires, that lead to the fight with Colter.
He listened carefully the advice of that voice from the intercom, that Gage guy. He wondered where the catch was, what was the reason behind all of that mess.
Then he prepared for the fight, after catching some breath in the locker room. In one hand he held the Thirst Zapper, in the other one the revolver of the man who took everything from him.
It all seemed so absurd and ridiculous.
He stepped into the arena and fought following Gage's advice, using the water to deactivate Colter's armor and the revolver to finish him off.
During a close encounter Colter vigorously pushed him against a bumper car, opening a large wound on the side of his face. At that point it seemed all over, but Toby managed to escape again and gave him the final shot.
An earthquake came from the stands: applauses, whistles, screams. Some of the crowd’s comments were directed at the man who had helped him earlier, the man who now stood before Toby, behind a thick glass wall.
“Welcome the new Overboss,” he heard Gage say, or something like that.
He turned to him, and staggered forward a few steps.
That was the first time ever they saw each others face to face.
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And then, well…
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Toby asked for water.
(He drank some from the Thirst Zapper but he was still thirsty af)
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skyrigel · 4 months ago
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“Exile”
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Pairing: Cregan Stark x exiled!Reader
Hotd masterlist
You had no name, no home, no where you belonged. But Cregan doesn't think so, he thinks you belong to him, maybe you do.
Warning: Angst, hurt/comfort, jealousy, inappropriate language, fluff [ wc: 1.9k ]
・ ⋆ ・ ⠄⠂⋆ ・ ⠄⠂⋆ ・ ⠄⠂⋆ ・ ⠄⠂⋆ ・ ⠄⠂⋆ ・ ⋆ ・ ⠄⠂⋆ ・
You watched the snow flakes fall, like crushed sugar taking refuge on your lashes, soft and cold.
The girls had ofcourse abandoned sewing and started whispering to each other, and like always you were excluded, not that it concerned you, exiled.
Their ohhhs and ahhhs weren't quiet enough, you kept your head low and mouth tight, smearing your thumb in the insides of your hand.
That's where Cregan was standing, when you first met.
His face was cold and distant, watching as you were brought between these walls, stripped from your name, all titles, no honour to serve, no virtue to entact, just nameless exile, a no-one, truly pathetic.
You thought he wouldn't speak, the way he moved, his shoulders were always tense, like something physically was burdening him, and you weren't going to start with his frown—not that it was your concern but it wouldn't kill him to smile, he might look good if he smiled. And how coldly he spoke, you almost ran opposite of him during those first times.
Ofcourse he was good looking, very, what you were even playing at ? All the girl you were forced to indulge with talked of nothing but him, the noble ones were shy, only smiling under their breaths and blushing bright crimson while common court girls had wide mouths and broad imaginations, also filth —they spoke so much of the young wolf like they knew anything — they didn't, nothing at all.
Have you seen his ribs ?
he's...she beamed pink...very big. Yes bitch.
He's got so much there, chuckle, no, you haven't seen Martha, I have — Liar— And his mouth, ohhhh.
And he's wild like a wolf, just last night—No, he wasn't with you.
“Stop!”
All the girls snapped their head at you in union, some actually scared that it was Septa, some had mean, annoying frowns knitting on their dull, red faces.
“ What's with you ?” one of them said, She was the one who was boasting about her ‘wolf bite', a very angry bruise at the side of her neck, it looked more like hive. Bitch.
“ Don't...” You gulped, “ ...stop spreading rumours...you all..you never really—�� It was shameful, you couldn't talk, what would you tell them, that they don't know how it feels to be the one Cregan's arm, how it felt to be kissed by those lips, and to feel his heat creeping up your spine, how it felt to be his lover, no they didn't, none at all. lying whores.
“ She's gone insane.” One shrieked, covering her high pitched screeching of a laughter and other's joined for a snicker.
“ She's just jealous because she's too ugly to be his whore.”
Fuck you. You didn't if you said it or not.
“Aww, you nameless slut.”
Oh.
And you would've said something, but your throat was rigid, your cheeks burnt with shame and all you saw was girls with name, girls with father's and mother's, girls with futures and husbands and children, girls with home and prospects and life.
Then you looked down at your hands, beaten up with hard labour and prickled needles, a sense of reality washed like waves over you.
The kind of waves that brought you to winterfell, your mother's necklace was taken first, a ruby, exiles don't have the luxury.
“ You're no one's daughter, you have no name, no home, no noble blood. You don't belong and don't matter, do you understand ?”
No
“ Yes.”
And during those days in water, you thought what it meant, name wasn't a physical concept, it can't be stripped and yet it was —
“ Aye, girl ! ” that's what you'd become now, a girl, a girl who's no one.
But, you fought back the tears, turning your back to the chatter of giggles, nameless whore... pathetic, isn't she ?... Your eyes were brimming with tears and your vision was blurring, you just ran, wherever your flight took you, just far, far, far.
“ Ow —ouch.” You squealed, bumping against a hard except walls didn't have hands to steady you and wall didn't speak.
“ You should be care— Are you crying? ” Cregan said, he had that sweet way of talking to you, it's an inside joke.
“ Are you...are you scared of me ?” Cregan said, his mouth twitched in concern —worrying.
“ Oh...I..no..m'lord.” You bowed, feeling your cheeks flush, you realised how poor your attempts have been to avoid Cregan, only landing you to him personally seeking you out.
“ Cregan.” He said, noticing you wide blown eyes, “ Call me just Cregan. If you don't mind, lady Y/n ”
A pause. It's been a while you heard your name said so beautiful, each syllable, each sound resonating like waves rippling through water, a soft music, you couldn't believe it was something that was yours, that it belonged to you.
“ I am an exile.”
“ You never answered my question? Have i done something to offend you ? ”
You looked up at him, feeling your heart spiral in a lavender haze.
“ You, m'lord —” Cregan frowned, “ Cregan. You are...I..you speak coldly.”
“ Right.”
“ I shouldn't have said that.” You said it, panic seizing you but... was it...oh, he's smiling, Cregan Stark is smiling like a fool and it's so bright that you feel your skin melting, your bloody boiling and your mouth too dry.
“ Thanks, i think you wouldn't avoid me now.” He said, like a different person, his jaw was loose, his eyes were crinkling, his words were carrying warmth and sweetness.
“ I am not.” you sniffed, but he already had your wirsts in his grip, holding them like you were guilty. Maybe.
“ Tell me Y/n.” He urged, he leaned to inspect you, a tear fell down your eye, gathering at the tip of your chin.
“ It's nothing, really Cregan, nothing at all.” you tried to smile, it could've worked with anyone but Cregan knew your bones better than you, he frowned and if times were different, you would've kissed it away, whoosh.
“ Tell me darling, it would pain me if I couldn't take away your misery.” His eyes deepened in yours, brushing your cheeks and you leaned into his palm, “ I don't want to see you, I don't..fuck — it hurts me.”
“ I don't want to hurt you.” You said, loving him was like an itch, a never ending torment, craving him was stopping the itch only to realise you'd ripped off your skin, like that.
It began with you ducking around him in halls, turning away from him at every point because he just intimidated you, the way he looked, like he knew, like he could read everything that ran in and out your brain, it scared you, the power, the chaos.
Then something changed, whenever you were alone you found yourself with him, telling him about home, no longer home, praying and praying, and he watched, sometimes he joined too, kneeling beside you, shoulders touching, eyes closed and in those moments you drifted into a dream, in your dream you were getting married, you had dreams like this before but now the man had a face, a truly beautiful face, and you were saying your vows, you let yourself smile at those ridiculous sweet nothings, ofcourse no, you stupid, stupid girl, no.
And you loved talking to him because he listened, everything and nothing and he made no noise, nodding and smiling along, sometimes he would lean to your side, sometimes taking your hand and guiding to his hair while he laid in your lap, looking up to with stars in his eyes, and then one day war came and duty called.
“ I will come back to you.” sweet, he said it so sweetly that you could've died.
“ I know.” and maybe it was love that rippled the thought of parting, because love was afterall grief preserving, your breath hitched and you hesitated only a moment, a bare second before you reached on your tip toes, joining your lips to him, for a man who was ice, his lips were warm like fire, soft and warm.
You blushed when you heard grabbed your face, pulling back and looked into your eyes, a grin, almost spilling out of his mouth.
“ I will come to back to you.” and he kissed you again, kissing Cregan was like confetti, it's one moment everything is bursting golden and then the ashes settle, he has to leave, for war, but the sparkle never leaves — he'll come back to you.
“ Then tell me, please, let me help you.” Cregan's eyes were pained, his jaw hardening, he would break his face like that.
“ Just girlish tatter, they claim to know, claim that they have with you..you, that they know how it's like kissing you and how it's like bedding you and how —” You didn't realise you were breaking until Cregan swooped you in his arms and gathered your pieces, you were pathetic, and what if it's true, what if they know, it didn't matter, you were no one, no claim, no right, no name, exiled.
“ Oh, my darling...shhh.” He kissed the top of your head, his arms wrapped around you, helping you hold on to him.
“ They are all pathetic liars, all of them...no, they don't and they never will. Only you my baby, only you my lady.”
“ I am sorry...I am being pathetic.” You pressed your wet face into his cloak, somewhere inside his heart was beating, only for you, Cregan had told you very much, when he traced your finger on his chest, there, he would smile, can you feel it ? , He would gleam like a teenage boy, yes, i can, thud-thud-thud, You would lean down to press your ear on his chest, he would spoon you, skin by skin, just two warm bodies and glittering souls, yeah, just for you.
“ No, you're not, my darling. You're not, they are... pathetic and jealous.” He was raging, you knew, but he wouldn't lash out, not now because it would mean he would have to let go of you, not yet.
You smile into his arms, it will be okay, as long as it's like this, you and him, you don't need a name, really — just him, he's your home, he's yours, he's where you belong.
“Okay, okay...now calm down my lord.” You looked up at him, his brooding sulking face, no, they don't deserve it.
“ Huh, What did you say lady y/n ? ” He cocked his head, the corner of his mouth tugging at one end, beautiful.
“ I am an exile.” You said, watching as he shaked his head, wriggling you along as he shaked your waist in a hug-like way.
“ No.” He pecked your lips, “ you're mine.”
Maybe love wasn't just grief preserving, but life blooming like twilight flickered by the horizon, almost blinding but so beautiful.
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farannir · 8 months ago
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folklore (2020) lyrics that made my jaw drop
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with-my-calamitous-love · 7 months ago
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REASONS NOT TO END IT ALL:
1) all the unreleased songs from your favourite artist
2) all the dogs and cats waiting to be loved by you
3) GOTTA OUTLIVE THE HATERS
4) THE HATERS GONNA BE HAPPY IF YOU DIE
5) potatoes. boil them, mash them, fry them up till golden and crispy
6) we got 2 more fnaf movies to go
7) dr. pepper
8) you have so many hugs left to give and get
9) you might eat your favourite meal tomorrow
10) keep telling yourself “not today.” one day you won’t have to.
please, REBLOG + ADD MORE REASONS!
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sssatrn · 11 months ago
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I !! KEEP !!! FORGETTING !!! TO !!! POST !!!
anyways, here's some splash art i made of the solar project gang a little while ago. i put off working on these for a LONG TIME because i really didn't want to make boring old character references like i did last time. solution: i just allowed myself to draw them however i wanted!!
currently obsessively working on the new season. it's a bit of a doozy. i just love seeing my little characters do their silly little activities (and crimes).
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enyasaints · 6 months ago
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Why I choose the Bear. Sexual Assault Legal Fund
GOFUNDME:
Ways to support directly:
May 24, 2024
I will make update videos. If you have any questions feel free to ask. This is my first time putting myself out there so please be kind 💗
May 26, 2024
Unfortunately I have received any help :/
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lecsainz · 1 year ago
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Hi can you please do one about the Travis and Taylor rumours going around. Maybe like your Taylor’s sister dating Travis secretly for awhile now and your pregnant. And like the Taylor concert he went to he was like there with you and the football that Taylor went to she was like there with you. And it all comes out that he’s with you and not Taylor and they find out your pregnant and all and are so shocked and didn’t see it coming. Like if that makes sense 🙂
EVERYONE WAS WRONG
parings: travis kelce + swift!reader
author 🗒️’s: I missed writing smau 😭
summary: where you are taylor swift sister and there’s something with travis but everyone thinks he and taylor are dating.
✩. . . masterlist !
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liked by selenagomez, icespice and 1.989.073 others
ynswift can I say I'm cheating on the eagles?
tag: @/taylorswift @/chiefs
see all 65.638 comments
taylorswift still can't believe you made me come to this game
⤷ ynswift didn't force you at all!
user6 love seeing the swift sisters together
killatrav It was nice meeting you, y/n
⤷ ynswift likewise, kelce
⤷ killatrav hope to see you girls at the next game
⤷ ynswift I need to check my schedule
user1 y/n being the cupid of tayvis
user Is it confirmed that taylor and travis are together???
⤷ user4 I think so
user2 she it's me in life: the friend who always couples people up
user5 andrea, please adopt me to be their sister!
⤷ ynswift mom said she'd adopt!
⤷ user5 OH MY GOD
philadelphiaeagles no comments
⤷ ynswift I swear we still loyal to your team
user7 I want a tayvis photo, make it happen y/n!
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Y/N and Travis had met during a The Eras concert, what seemed like a normal show turned into something entirely different. Y/N didn't expect it until she literally ran into this 6'5'' tall man. He was so much taller than her that she couldn't help but feel incredibly drawn to the unknown man, so much so that she forgot how to speak when he asked if she was okay.
Travis found the blonde girl utterly charming and just had to ask for her number. However, instead of getting her number, he received a polite but firm "no." That piqued the curiosity of the Kansas City Chiefs' tight end. With determination, he approached one of the security guards to inquire about the mysterious blonde girl. After a bit of investigating, he finally discovered that she was Y/N Swift, the younger sister of the famous Taylor Swift.
Travis couldn't help but be intrigued by this revelation. He felt compelled to get to know Y/N better, despite the initial rejection. It took him over a week to gather the courage to send her a direct message. When he did, he invited her to an Eagles game, which he later learned was the Swift family's favorite team, and having her older brother on the team made it easier to secure a private suite for their date.
As the two of them spent more time together, a genuine connection began to form. Y/N was captivated by Travis's charisma and his down-to-earth personality, something she hadn't experienced with anyone in a long time. Travis, on the other hand, was smitten with Y/N's intelligence, warmth, and her unique ability to make him forget about the pressures of the football field.
One date led to another, and before they knew it, they were deeply involved in a relationship that neither had anticipated. Their connection was electric, and they couldn't get enough of each other's company.
As the days turned into weeks and then into months, Y/N and Travis's bond grew stronger. They had shared dreams, inside jokes, and an unspoken understanding that went beyond the public eye. But their connection was shrouded in secrecy, as Y/N didn't want to overshadow her sister's fame and success.
Despite their efforts to keep things private, the media eventually caught wind of their relationship. Reports began to circulate, with speculations of a romance between Travis and Taylor Swift, not Y/N. The rumors hurt Y/N, as it seemed like her own life would always be overshadowed by her sister's immense fame.
Little did she know that amidst the media frenzy and the complications of their secret relationship, she would find herself facing an unexpected twist of fate – she was pregnant with Travis's child.
As days turned into weeks, Y/N couldn't keep the secret any longer. She knew she needed to tell Travis about the life-changing news, despite the fear and uncertainty that loomed over her. She had never been in a situation like this before.
One evening, she decided it was time to confide in Travis. With her heart pounding, she went to his house, her mind filled with thoughts of how he might react. Would he be overwhelmed? Would he want to be a part of this?
Travis opened the door and smiled warmly at her, inviting her in. Y/N took a deep breath and began, "Travis, there's something I need to talk to you about, something important."
Travis's expression shifted from curiosity to concern. "What's going on, Y/N? You look serious."
Y/N took a deep breath and began, "Travis, there's something I need to tell you. It's not easy, and we didn't plan for this, but..." She paused, her eyes glistening with emotion, "I'm pregnant."
For a few seconds, there was silence. Travis processed the information, and his eyes filled with a mix of emotions, but he didn't look away from Y/N. Then, a gentle smile crossed his face. "Y/N, are you serious? We're going to be parents?"
Y/N nodded with a soft smile. "Yes, Travis. I'm pregnant."
Travis leaned in closer, his face filled with emotion. "That's incredible! I can't believe it. I'm going to be a dad."
Tears welled up in Y/N's eyes as she saw his genuine excitement. "I'm so glad you're happy, Travis. I was worried about how you'd react."
Travis took her hands in his and looked deeply into her eyes. "Y/N, I couldn't be happier. This is a beautiful surprise, and I'm looking forward to this journey with you. We'll figure everything out together."
Y/N felt a wave of relief wash over her. She couldn't believe how supportive Travis was being. "Travis, you have no idea how much this means to me. I was so afraid to tell you."
Travis took her hand and said, "Y/N, I care about you more than I can express. In fact, there's something I've been wanting to ask you for a while now." He got down on one knee, pulling a small box from his pocket. "Will you do me the honor of becoming my girlfriend?"
Y/N's eyes welled up with tears of joy as she nodded and replied, "Yes, Travis, a thousand times, yes."
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liked by taylorswift, annehathaway and 23.366.133 others ynswift & killatrav you said I do and I did too
comments have been limited
taylorswift so happy for you both 🤍 and travis you better take good care of my little sister!
austinkingsleyswift congrats sis!
jason.kelce finally, you guys announced it! I couldn't stand not being able to talk about it anymore. congratulations lovebirds!
chiefs welcome to chiefs family y/n!
donnakelce I'm so happy to have you in the family now y/n! 💕
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imthebadguyyy · 6 months ago
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my boy only breaks his favourite toys
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pairing : charles leclerc x reader
fandom : f1
series : the tortured poets department
warnings : angst baby angst, no comfort here.
a/n : this broke my heart a little but oh well.
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oh here we go again...
The late afternoon sun filtered through the large windows of the Monaco apartment, casting a golden hue over the modern, embellished living room. You and Charles  stood in the kitchen, a simmering tension between you.
"You know how important this event is to me, Charles," you said, your voice steady but with an edge of frustration. "I've been looking forward to it for weeks."
Charles sighed, running a hand through his tousled hair. "I know, and I'm sorry, but you know how demanding the F1 schedule is. I have commitments I can't get out of."
You crossed your arms, your eyes narrowing slightly. "Oh, here we go again," you muttered, more to yourself than to him. "Every time I have something important, it's always the same excuse."
Charles's eyes flashed with a mixture of guilt and frustration. "It's not an excuse, Y/N. This is my job. It's what I've worked for my entire life."
"And what about what I've worked for?" you shot back, your voice rising. "This event is a big deal for me, and it feels like you don't even care."
Charles stepped closer, his expression softening as he reached out to touch your arm. "That's not fair. I do care, deeply. But I can't just drop everything because our schedules clash."
You pulled away, taking a deep breath to steady yourself. "It feels like your career always comes first, Charles. I need you to be there for me too, just once."
He sighed, frustration giving way to a deep sadness in his eyes. "I want to be there for you, but I don't know how to balance everything."
You looked at him, your eyes filled with unshed tears. "Maybe it's time you figure out how, because I can't keep doing this. I need to know I'm important to you too."
Charles's face hardened slightly, a storm brewing in his eyes. "This again? You think I don't know how important you are? I can't be in two places at once, Y/N."
Your voice shook with emotion as you replied, "I'm not asking you to be perfect, Charles. I'm asking you to make an effort."
His frustration boiled over, his tone sharp. "I am making an effort! But you can't expect me to be there for every single event when I'm fighting for my career."
Your tears finally spilled over, your voice breaking. "I'm not asking for every single event. I'm asking for this one. But it seems like that's too much to ask."
Charles stared at you, his jaw clenched, before he turned away abruptly. "I can't do this right now," he muttered, grabbing his jacket from the back of a chair.
"Where are you going?" you asked, your voice trembling.
"Out," he said curtly, not looking back as he headed for the door. "I need some air."
The door slammed behind him, leaving you standing alone in the quiet apartment, the echo of your argument hanging heavy in the air. You sank onto the couch, wrapping your arms around yourself, feeling a cold emptiness settle in your chest. The silence was deafening, and for the first time, you wondered if your love could withstand the strain of your clashing worlds.
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rivulets descend my plastic smile...
The grand ballroom of the FIA Gala was adorned with sparkling lights and elegant decorations, a fitting venue for the prestigious event. You arrived on Charles's arm, feeling a mix of excitement and nerves. As a famous singer, you were set to perform a song later in the evening, and the anticipation was palpable.
Charles looked dashing in his tailored suit, and he squeezed your hand reassuringly as you made your way through the crowd, greeting fellow drivers and attendees. You couldn't help but notice the pride in his eyes as he introduced you to his colleagues, but a small part of you hoped that pride would extend to your performance later.
As the evening progressed, you were called to the stage. The crowd applauded as you took your place at the microphone, the spotlight shining brightly on you. The music started, and you poured your heart into the song, your voice resonating through the grand hall.
But as you sang, your eyes scanned the audience, searching for Charles. When you found him, your heart sank. He wasn't watching your performance. Instead, he was at the bar, engrossed in conversation with a group of people, a drink in hand. He didn't even glance in your direction.
You fought to keep your composure, finishing the song with as much passion as you could muster. The crowd erupted in applause, but the hurt gnawed at you. As you stepped off the stage, Lewis Hamilton, Carlos Sainz, Alex Albon, and Pierre Gasly approached you, their expressions a mix of admiration and concern.
"That was incredible, Y/N," Lewis said, giving you a warm hug.
"Seriously, you were amazing," Carlos added, his smile genuine.
Alex and Pierre echoed their sentiments, but there was an undercurrent of awkwardness.
"We're sorry about Charles," Pierre said quietly, glancing towards the bar. "He should have been watching you."
You forced a smile, gratitude for their support mingling with the sting of Charles's neglect. "Thank you, guys. It means a lot."
After exchanging a few more pleasantries, you excused yourself, needing a moment to collect your thoughts. You made your way to the bathroom, the weight of the evening pressing down on you. Once inside, you locked the door behind you and leaned against the sink, the tears you'd been holding back finally spilling over.
The sound of the bustling gala outside was muted here, leaving you alone with your thoughts and your pain. You couldn't understand why Charles couldn't be there for you, why he couldn't even watch you perform for just a few minutes. The hurt and frustration were overwhelming, and you let yourself cry, the tears a cathartic release.
As you stood there, you wondered if this was something you could continue to endure. Being with someone who couldn't support you in the moments that mattered most was taking its toll. For now, though, you just needed to let the tears fall, hoping that somehow, things might get better.
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but you should have seen him when he first saw me...
The apartment in Monaco was filled with the echoes of another heated argument. You were standing in the middle of the living room, tears streaming down your face, your voice rising with each word.
"Why can't you understand, Charles? I need you to be there for me! It's always about your career, your races, your commitments! This is the grammy's! the most important awards night ever! Why can't you make time for me?!" You screamed, the frustration and pain evident in every syllable.
Charles stood across from you, his face a mixture of anger and helplessness. "I do understand, Y/N, but you know how important my career is! I can't just drop everything whenever you need me!"
Your hands trembled as you wiped away the tears. "You should have seen you when you first saw me," you cried, your voice breaking. "You looked at me like I was the most important person in the world. Where did that go, Charles?"
The memory hit Charles like a punch to the gut, sending him back to the first time he saw you. It was at the Monza Grand Prix. He had just finished his race, the adrenaline still pumping through his veins, when he saw you standing near the paddock. You were talking animatedly with a friend, your smile lighting up the entire area.
Charles had stopped in his tracks, his breath catching in his throat. He remembered how his teammates teased him about looking like a lovestruck puppy, but he couldn't help it. You were captivating, and he had been instantly drawn to you.
In the present, he struggled to reconcile that moment with the reality of the argument unfolding before him. "I remember," he said quietly, his voice filled with regret. "I remember how I felt when I first saw you. But things have changed, Y/N. The demands of my career... it's not easy."
"Things have changed because you let them," you shouted, the pain in your voice cutting through him. "You let your career come between us. You promised you'd be there for me, but you're never there when I need you."
Charles took a step towards you, reaching out, but you recoiled. "Don't, Charles. I'm tired of empty promises."
He dropped his hand, feeling the weight of your words. "I don't want to lose you," he said softly, his voice breaking.
"Then start showing it," you whispered, your tears flowing freely. "Because right now, I feel like I'm losing you."
The silence that followed was heavy, filled with the unspoken fears and regrets that had been building between you. Charles stood there, torn between his love for you and the relentless demands of his career. And you, feeling the ache of his absence even when he was right in front of you, wondered if things would ever go back to how they once were.
Finally, unable to bear the silence any longer, Charles turned and left the apartment, the door closing softly behind him. You sank to the floor, the tears coming harder now, the memories of better times a bittersweet reminder of what you had lost.
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he saw forever so he smashed it up..
The soft glow of the bedside lamp cast a warm light over the room as you and Charles lay entwined under the covers, the quiet hum of the city outside barely audible. His arms were wrapped around you, his heartbeat a comforting rhythm against your back. It was one of those rare, peaceful moments when everything felt just right.
You turned slightly to face him, your head resting on his chest. "Charles," you began softly, tracing patterns on his skin with your fingertips, "do you ever think about our future? Like, where we might be in a few years?"
Charles's hand stilled on your back, and you felt his body tense slightly. The question hung in the air, and a heavy silence settled over the room. You waited, expecting him to respond with his usual confident assurance, but instead, there was only hesitance.
"Charles?" you prompted, your voice quieter now, a hint of uncertainty creeping in.
He shifted slightly, looking away as if searching for the right words. "I... I don't know, Y/N," he finally said, his voice barely above a whisper.
The silence that followed felt deafening. You tried to hide the sinking feeling in your chest, forcing a small smile as you looked up at him. "It's okay," you said, attempting to sound light-hearted. "We don't have to figure it all out right now."
But the emptiness inside you grew, a hollow ache that his words had planted there. You cuddled closer, burying your face in his chest, hoping the warmth of his embrace could fill the void. Yet, the unspoken truth lingered, a shadow over the moment of intimacy.
Charles held you tighter, as if trying to reassure both you and himself. But the hesitation in his response, the uncertainty in his eyes, left you feeling more alone than ever. You had wanted a glimpse of a shared future, a promise of what could be, but instead, you were left with doubts and questions.
As you lay there in his arms, you couldn't shake the feeling of loss, the odd emptiness that settled over you. The love you shared was real, but the future you hoped for seemed suddenly fragile, like a dream that might slip away at any moment.
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ill tell you that he runs because he loves me...
The lively buzz of conversation filled the upscale restaurant as you sat with Charles and a group of fellow F1 drivers—Lewis Hamilton, Carlos Sainz, Pierre Gasly, and Alex Albon. The evening had started well, laughter and camaraderie flowing easily around the table.
Charles had been in good spirits, joking and sharing stories, but after the main course, he excused himself to go to the bathroom. At first, you thought nothing of it, but as the minutes ticked by, the knot of anxiety in your stomach grew tighter.
Carlos glanced at you, his brow furrowing slightly. "Everything okay, Y/N?" he asked, his voice gentle.
You forced a smile, trying to appear unconcerned. "Yeah, he just went to the bathroom. He'll be back soon."
The conversation continued, but your eyes kept darting toward the hallway, hoping to see Charles returning. After what felt like an eternity, the worry and embarrassment began to creep in. You knew the other drivers were aware of the growing tension.
Lewis leaned closer, his expression kind but concerned. "Do you want to go check on him?"
You shook your head, swallowing hard. "No, it's fine. He runs because he loves me," you joked, trying to keep your voice steady. "He just needs a moment."
The table fell into an awkward silence. You could see the sympathy in their eyes, a silent acknowledgment that they understood more than they were letting on. It stung, their pity, but you held your head high, determined not to let your emotions show.
Pierre reached over, giving your hand a gentle squeeze. "We know he loves you, Y/N," he said softly.
Alex nodded in agreement, though his eyes mirrored the concern you felt. "Sometimes it’s just hard to see someone we care about struggle."
You nodded, biting your lip to keep the tears at bay. "Thanks, guys. I appreciate it."
Just as you began to lose hope, Charles finally reappeared, looking slightly disheveled but smiling as if nothing had happened. He slid back into his seat beside you, wrapping an arm around your shoulders. "Sorry, I took so long," he said lightly. "I got caught up talking to someone."
You nodded, leaning into him, though your heart ached with the knowledge that something was off. The rest of the evening passed in a blur, the camaraderie tainted by the lingering unease.
As you all said your goodbyes and headed home, you couldn't shake the feeling of emptiness. Charles held your hand, but the connection felt fragile, like a thread that might snap at any moment. The sympathy in the other drivers' eyes haunted you, a reminder that love alone might not be enough to bridge the growing distance between you.
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he took me out my box...
The dim light of your bedroom lamp cast a soft glow over your face as you lay on your bed, your phone propped up on the pillow. Charles’s familiar features filled the screen, but there was a distance in his eyes that you couldn’t ignore. The nighttime quiet amplified the unspoken tension between you as you spoke quietly over FaceTime.
“So, how was your day?” you asked, trying to keep the conversation light.
Charles smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “Busy, as usual. Lots of meetings and prep work for the next race.”
You nodded, offering a small smile in return. “I miss you. It feels like we haven’t really talked in ages.”
He glanced away for a moment, his attention seemingly captured by something offscreen. “Yeah, I miss you too,” he said absently, his focus clearly elsewhere.
The silence stretched, and you couldn’t help but feel a pang of sadness. You studied his face, searching for the spark that had once been so evident. Your mind drifted back to a time when things were different, when his love had been your anchor.
It was a little over a year ago, at a time when you were at your lowest. The world seemed bleak, and you had felt utterly lost. Charles had been there, though, in a way you never expected. He spent every day by your side, offering comfort and support. He made you laugh when all you wanted to do was cry, held you close when you felt like falling apart. It was during those dark days that he had fallen for you, his love a beacon of hope that guided you through the storm.
You remembered the gentle way he would look at you, as if you were the most precious thing in the world. He would bring you your favorite tea, sit with you in silence when words were too much, and remind you every day of your worth and strength. It was those moments that made you fall in love with him, his unwavering presence and the way he seemed to understand your pain.
“Do you remember when we first started dating?” you asked softly, breaking the silence.
Charles’s eyes flickered back to you, a hint of confusion in his expression. “Of course I do,” he replied. “Why do you ask?”
You hesitated, trying to find the right words. “I was just thinking about how much you were there for me when I was going through a tough time. You spent your days looking after me, making sure I was okay. It meant the world to me.”
His face softened slightly, a small sigh escaping his lips. “Yeah, I remember. You needed someone, and I wanted to be that person for you.”
Your heart ached at his words, knowing how far things had drifted. “I needed you then, and I still need you now, Charles. I miss how close we used to be.”
He looked at you, the conflict evident in his eyes. “I’m still here, Y/N. Things are just... different now.”
The emptiness you had been trying to ignore settled heavily in your chest. “I know. It just feels like we’re growing apart, and I don’t know how to fix it.”
Charles remained silent, his gaze dropping to the floor. The connection that had once been so strong now felt fragile and tenuous.
“I love you, Charles,” you whispered, hoping to bridge the gap between you.
He looked back up at you, his expression weary. “I love you too, Y/N. I really do.”
But as the call ended and the screen went dark, you couldn’t shake the feeling of loss that lingered. The memories of better times clashed with the present reality, leaving you with a deep sense of longing for the man who had once been your everything.
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im queen, of sand castles he destroys...
The tension in the air was suffocating as you and Charles stood locked in a heated argument, words flying like arrows, each one piercing deeper than the last. His face was contorted with anger, his fists clenched at his sides, and in a moment of blind rage, he reached out and grabbed the grammy award from the shelf.
"No, Charles, don't!" you cried out, but it was too late. With a violent motion, he hurled the award to the ground, the sound of shattering glass filling the room.
You gasped, the shock of his actions leaving you momentarily speechless. Tears stung your eyes as you stared at the broken pieces of your prized possession, a symbol of your hard work and dedication. Anger surged through you, hot and fierce, but it was quickly replaced by a cold, numbing emptiness.
"You... you destroyed it," you whispered, your voice barely above a whisper.
Charles's chest heaved with exertion, his eyes blazing with a mixture of fury and regret. "I don't care," he spat out, his voice dripping with venom. "I'm sick of pretending like everything's fine when it's not. I can't stand being with you anymore."
The weight of his words crashed down on you like a tidal wave, leaving you reeling in disbelief. He had shattered more than just an award; he had shattered your trust, your love, everything you had built together.
Without a word, you turned away from him, your heart heavy with grief and betrayal. You couldn't bear to look at him any longer, couldn't bear to see the man you had once loved reduced to this. With trembling hands, you reached for your phone, dialing a number you never thought you'd have to call.
"Hello?" a voice answered on the other end.
"Mom," you choked out, tears streaming down your face. "Can you come over? I need you."
As you hung up the phone, you felt Charles's eyes boring into your back, but you refused to turn around. The damage had been done, irreparable and irreversible. And as you heard him storm out of the room, you knew that this was the end.
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when I fix me, he's gonna miss me...
The stage was set, the crowd buzzing with anticipation as you stood under the bright lights, microphone in hand. Your heart raced with nervous excitement, knowing that tonight would be a turning point in your career. As the music swelled and the spotlight found you, you took a deep breath and began to speak.
"Thank you all for being here tonight," you said, your voice steady despite the butterflies in your stomach. "I have some exciting news to share with you all."
The audience leaned in, hanging on your every word as you made the announcement they had been waiting for. "I'm thrilled to announce that I'll be releasing a new album," you declared, a smile spreading across your face as cheers erupted from the crowd. "And not only that, but I'll be dropping the lead single tonight."
As the excitement built to a crescendo, you couldn't help but feel a surge of satisfaction. This was your moment, your chance to take control of your narrative and reclaim your power. With a sense of purpose, you raised the microphone to your lips once more.
"The lead single is titled 'My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys'," you announced, your voice ringing out clear and strong. "And to the boy who broke all his favorite toys and my fucking heart, this is one big fuck you from me to you."
The words hung in the air, charged with emotion and defiance. There was a collective gasp from the audience, followed by a thunderous applause that seemed to shake the rafters. In that moment, you knew you had struck a chord, tapping into a universal truth that resonated with people far and wide.
As you launched into the song, pouring your heart and soul into every word, you felt a sense of liberation wash over you. This was your anthem, your battle cry, and you sang it with a fierce intensity that left no doubt in anyone's mind that you were taking back control of your life.
And when the performance went viral, spreading like wildfire across social media and capturing the hearts of millions, you knew that you had made the right choice. You had turned your pain into power, your heartbreak into art, and in doing so, you had found a strength within yourself that you never knew existed.
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a/n : thanks for reading! as always comments likes reblogs feedback etc is always appreciated 🤍
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alana-reid-2005 · 4 months ago
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and when i felt like i was an old cardigan under someone’s bed, you put me on and said i was your favorite 🍁
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