#surprisingly somewhat proofread

[hxxsxxng]

Past Wounds, Present Hearts P.SH

「Pairing」 : exbully!sunghoon x fem!reader

「Word Count」 : 10.5k

「Genre」 : smut, angst, somewhat fluff, college au

「Summary」 : you have felt resentment for sunghoon ever since the hell he put you through in middle school. now you find out he goes to your university.... and he's kinda hot?

「Warnings」 : MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!!! mentions of bullying, lower quality of life due to bullying, self doubt, mentions of drinking alcohol, implied intoxication in some scenes, college parties, sunghoon calls reader petnames, kissing, sharing a bed, nipple play, fingering, titty sucking, handjob, sunghoon turns out to be a sweetheart, cum eating, falling asleep together, and more

「Authors Note」 : i originally intended for the story to have a different ending but i changed my mind half way though and it would have been too fast paced for the word count given, i will definitely make a part two if enough people ask! not proofread

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I hate him. The smug look on his face when I walk pass him in the main campus hall. All of the girls clawing on to his shoulder, begging for his attention without knowing what fucking loser he is. The way all of the professors are so impressed with him for doing practically nothing in class. Getting a full ride scholarship for basketball to this school. I have grown sick of it.

Park Sunghoon. The name still twists my stomach after all these years. Middle school was when my hatred started for Him. He was my middle school bully. Always teasing me in front of the whole class, or making comments behind my back. What hurts the most is that he doesn’t seem to care that he used to act this way, or maybe he thinks I have forgotten. The truth is, I will never forget. It sits at the back of my mind all of the time. The people who know me from middle school still view me as this ‘disgusting’ girl who was unlikeable, because of the things that Sunghoon would do to me.

It took years for me to build myself back up, so when I saw that he was planning on going to the same university as me last fall, I was more than worried. But this wasn’t middle school anymore. I can’t let him get away with treating me like an outcast who doesn’t deserve friends.First semester of university is always scary, I was always afraid to come out my shell and meet new people. I wanted to stay on top of acedemics. My best friend Yuqi was the complete opposite. Any opportunity she got to go out and party, she would be there. And, she would surprisingly maintain decent grades as well. Now that I think about it, I have never been a party goer, not even in highschool. Then again, there weren’t too many parties that either sounded interesting, or that I was invited to.

“Kappa Alpha is having a party this Friday, you in?” Yuqi suggested. She always gets the same response. “No, you already know I can’t, we have finals next week” I shrugged. “But Kappaaaaaa!” Yuqi whined, her voice getting higher every passing second. We were walking down the hallway towards our classes. A few students looked over, but quickly decided that they didn’t want to look any further. “I hear that Kappa Alpha has the best Christmas parties every year. You have to come” Yuqi insisted, grabbing onto my arm. I rolled my eyes. “Yuqi… You don’t actually think I’m going to attend one of their parties?” Yuqi gave me a confused stare, trying to read through my expression. “Why not?” “Sunghoon is in that frat, I’m pretty sure he lives in the frat house as well. You would catch me dead before seeing me step foot into that trashy hell hole” I explained, crossing my arm defensively. She knows how he treated me in middle school, she was there to witness it.

“What? He can’t be, out of all the parties I have gone to there, I have not seen him a singular time” Yuqi said with her eyebrows furrowed, putting emphasis into each word.. I tried to tell her that yes, he is the type of guy to hide out in the frat house and not attend, but she had no idea. After some debate, she eventually gave up asking me.

That night, I lay in bed, staring at the ceiling fan as it spun lazily above me. Yuqi's words echoed in my mind, mixing with memories I'd rather forget. The Christmas lights strung across my dorm room cast a soft glow, but they did little to brighten my mood.

I rolled onto my side, hugging my pillow close. Why did Sunghoon have to be here, at my university, in my space? It wasn't fair. I'd worked so hard to leave that part of my life behind, to become someone new. Someone stronger.

But was I really stronger if I was still letting him dictate my choices? I grabbed my phone, thumb hovering over Yuqi's contact. She was probably out somewhere, living it up like she always did. I envied her sometimes, her ability to just… exist without all this baggage.

"Maybe I should go," I whispered to the empty room. The words felt foreign on my tongue. Me? At a Kappa Alpha party? It was absurd.

I sat up, running a hand through my messy hair. Yuqi would be ecstatic if I went. And isn't that what college is supposed to be about? New experiences, stepping out of your comfort zone?

But then I imagined walking into that frat house, the pulsing music, the crowded rooms. And somewhere in there, Sunghoon. Everybody loving him not knowing the kind of cruel person he is on the inside. My stomach clenched at the thought.

"This is stupid," I muttered, flopping back onto my bed. "I don't need to prove anything to anyone."

But even as I thought it, I knew it wasn't true. I did need to prove something - to myself. That I could face my past, that I could exist in the same space as Sunghoon without falling apart.

I picked up my phone again, this time opening my messages to Yuqi. "Hey," I typed, then paused. Was I really doing this? My finger hovered over the send button as doubt crept in. But then I thought of Yuqi's excited face, of the possibility of actually enjoying myself for once.

Before I could change my mind, I quickly typed out the rest of the message and hit send. "Hey. About that Kappa Alpha party… I think I might go after all." I set my phone down, my heart racing. What had I just agreed to?​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​Yuqi didn’t see my message until the morning, but I can only imagine her physical reaction after reading her written one. “Really???? I never thought this day would come. I promise you will love it!!!” my screen read. Her overuse of punctuation was telling enough about she felt. It was Friday morning, meaning that the party was going to be later in tonight. If I plan my time correctly, we can leave my dorm around 8pm, and I would have had all of the studying done that at I needed to do for the night.

I couldn’t help feeling nervous at the thought of attending a party with Sunghoon, but I decided that this may be the perfect chance to get to know him better. Okay, not ‘get to know him better’ but maybe this could finally give him a chance to clear the air between us, to apologize properly for everything that he did to me. But the chances of him apologizing are slim to none. When I see him in campus he seems to be the snobby type, unable to admit that they are wrong. Trust me, I have heard the stories going around campus.

I spent the rest of the day in a fog, my mind drifting between lectures and study sessions. The impending party loomed over me, a mix of dread and nervous anticipation.

By the time I returned to my dorm, the sun was already setting. I sat at my desk, attempting to review my notes, but the words blurred together. My phone buzzed - another excited text from Yuqi about outfit choices. I sighed, closing my textbook. There was no point in pretending to study anymore.

~~~~~

At 7:00, a knock at my door announced Yuqi's arrival. She entered with her usual whirlwind energy, arms full of clothes and makeup. "Okay," she said, dumping everything onto my bed. "Let's make you look amazing."

I eyed the pile warily. "Yuqi, I'm not trying to impress anyone. Especially not Sunghoon." She paused, giving me a soft look. "This isn't about him. It's about you feeling good about yourself. Now, let's start with this sweater."

For the next half hour, we sifted through outfits. Yuqi was patient, letting me veto anything too revealing or flashy. We finally settled on a soft, cropped sweater and high-waisted jeans - comfortable, but still party-appropriate.

As I changed, Yuqi chatted about her day, her excitement for the party. Her casual banter helped ease my nerves, reminding me why I'd agreed to this in the first place. This was about spending time with my best friend, not about Sunghoon.

We left my dorm at 8:15, the cool night air a welcome relief for my flushed cheeks. The walk to the frat house was short, but with each step, the butterflies in my stomach intensified. Music pulsed in the distance, growing louder as we approached.

Outside the house, we paused. Yuqi squeezed my hand. "You okay?" she asked, her voice gentle.

I took a deep breath, nodding. "Yeah. Let's do this."

We stepped inside, and I was immediately overwhelmed. The air was thick with the smell of alcohol and too many bodies in too small a space. Yuqi leaned close, "I'm going to get us some drinks. Will you be okay for a minute?"

I nodded, not trusting my voice. As she disappeared into the crowd, I stood there, taking in my surroundings. Groups of people clustered around, laughing and dancing. I recognized a few faces from classes, but no one I knew well.

And then, across the room, I saw him. Sunghoon, leaning against a wall, surrounded by his usual admirers. He was laughing at something someone said, his head thrown back. For a moment, I was transported back to middle school, hearing that laugh directed at me, mocking and cruel.

Our eyes met for a brief second, and I swear I saw something flicker in his expression. Surprise? Recognition? But before I could process it, someone bumped into me, breaking the moment.

I turned away, my heart pounding. What was I doing here? This was a mistake. I was about to head for the door when Yuqi reappeared, pressing a red cup into my hand.

"Here," she said with a smile. "It'll help you relax." I took a small sip, the unfamiliar burn of alcohol hitting the back of my throat. As we stood there, Yuqi chatting animatedly about the people around us, I felt myself slowly start to unwind. Maybe agreeing to come here wasn’t too bad of an idea.I was just starting to relax, the music and Yuqi's chatter creating a comfortable bubble around us, when I saw him approaching. Sunghoon, weaving through the crowd, his eyes fixed on... us? No, it couldn't be. But it was.

He stopped right in front of us, that infuriatingly perfect smile plastered on his face. "Hey, Yuqi," he said, his voice smooth as ever. Then his eyes slid to me. "And Y/N,… it's been a while, hasn't it?" I felt my body tense, my grip tightening on the red cup in my hand. Yuqi glanced between us, her eyes wide with surprise and a hint of concern. "Sunghoon," I managed to say, my voice coming out colder than I'd intended. But then again, why should I care? He seemed unfazed by my tone. "I didn't expect to see you here. You're not usually the party type, right?" The casual way he said it, as if he knew me, as if we were old friends catching up, made my blood boil. How dare he act so nonchalant after everything? "People change," I replied curtly. "Not that you'd know anything about that." I avoided eye contact. I saw Yuqi wince beside me, but I couldn't bring myself to care. Sunghoon's smile faltered for a moment, a flicker of... something passing across his face. Confusion? Hurt? Good.

"Right," he said, recovering quickly. Looking down at the ground with a half smile, he takes ​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​my snarky response as a que to leave. “I’ll see you around, (Y/N)” he scoffs and walks away.

“He is such an asshole” Yuqi complains, rubbing my back as a way to try to comfort me. “You responded well” I watched Sunghoon's tall, muscular figure get lost in the crowd, a mix of emotions swirling inside me. Part of me felt satisfied with how I'd handled the encounter, but another part felt... unsettled. I took a long swig from my cup, hoping the alcohol would dull the conflicting feelings. "Thanks," I mumbled to Yuqi, grateful for her support. She gave me a reassuring smile, but I could see the concern in her eyes. "Do you want to leave? We can if you're not comfortable." I considered it for a moment. The idea of going back to my dorm, burying myself in my blankets and pretending this night never happened, was tempting. But then I thought about how that's exactly what the old me would have done. The me that let Sunghoon's actions dictate her life.

"No," I said, surprising myself with the firmness in my voice. "I'm not leaving. I have just as much right to be here as he does." Yuqi's face broke into a wide grin. "That's my girl!" she cheered, linking her arm through mine. "Let's mingle a bit, shall we?" As we made our way through the crowded room, I couldn't help but notice Sunghoon's gaze following us. Every time I glanced in his direction, he looked away, but not before I caught a flicker of... something in his eyes. It wasn't the cruel amusement I remembered from our school days. It was something else, something I couldn't quite place.

Yuqi introduced me to a few of her friends, and I found myself actually enjoying the conversations. It felt... normal. Like maybe I could do this whole college social scene thing after all. But then, over someone's shoulder, I saw Sunghoon again. He was looking right at us, his expression unreadable. Our eyes met for a brief moment, and I felt a jolt of... something. Before I could analyze it further, he quickly averted his gaze, a faint blush coloring his cheeks. Wait, was Sunghoon blushing? I shook off the thought. It was probably just the alcohol playing tricks on my mind.

As the night wore on, I found myself relaxing more and more. The alcohol helped, but it was more than that. Every minute I spent here, laughing with Yuqi and her friends, was a minute I was reclaiming for myself. Yet, I couldn't shake the feeling of being watched. Every so often, I'd catch Sunghoon looking in my direction. But it wasn't the mocking stare I was used to. There was something almost... wistful about it. Once, when our eyes met, he even offered a small, hesitant smile before quickly turning the other way. I don’t understand why he is trying to smile at me. It was confusing, to say the least. This wasn't the Sunghoon I remember. The Sunghoon who had made my life miserable. This Sunghoon seemed... different. Unsure. Almost vulnerable. As Yuqi and I were preparing to leave, I excused myself to use the bathroom. On my way back, I quite literally bumped into Sunghoon in the hallway. "Oh, sorry," he mumbled, steadying me with a hand on my arm. The touch sent an unexpected jolt through me. "You okay?" I nodded, unsureness in my voice. We stood there for a moment, an awkward silence stretching between us. "Listen, Y/N," he started, then paused, running a hand through his jet black hair. "I... I'm glad you came tonight. It was good to see you."

Before I could respond, he quickly walked away, leaving me standing there, completely baffled. It wasn't until much later, as Yuqi and I were stumbling back to our dorms, arms linked and giggling about nothing in particular, that I realized something. For the first time in years, I'd spent an entire evening in the same space as Sunghoon without letting it ruin my night. And more than that, I was left with the strangest feeling that maybe there was more to Sunghoon than I'd allowed myself to see. As I collapsed onto my bed, exhausted but oddly content, I couldn't help but feel like something had shifted. I wasn't naive enough to think one party had erased years of hurt and resentment. But maybe it was a start.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

~~~~~

The next morning I woke up disoriented, borderline hungover. Roll over to the side to check the time on my phone. 11:09AM? It honestly felt like I slept for three days with how many drinks I consumed. I look further down the screen to see the notifications:

1:18 AM: @prksnghn02 started following you!

1:19 AM: @prksnghn02 Liked your post!

I must have fallen asleep to quickly too see this last night, but that was definitely right after we left the party.

I scroll through the conversation, smiling slightly at the messages

2:11 AM: @prksnghn02 Hey! You still here?

2:11 AM: @prksnghn02 I get it if you don’t want to speak to me.

Why was he messaging me. What gives him the right? I igonore the message and delete the message request. All that before my thumb hesitantly hovered over the follow button on his profile, eventually turning it grey. I spent the weekend as usual, going to my job at night and studying in the mornings. Though I had the awkward interaction with Sunghoon at one party, I think that I could see myself going with Yuqi to another party some time. Not soon though because finals start on Monday and I have to pass to keep my financial aid. That’s another thing that pisses me off. I work day and night to pay for my schooling by myself, and Sunghoon gets it all handed to him for being okay at basketball. He teased me for growing up less wealthy than him, but if he were in my shoes, he wouldn’t have thought it was so funny.

Monday morning I was walking through the main hall on campus, where they have to coffee shop that I occasionally stop by. Of course this time when I went, Sunghoon was standing at the bookstore across the walk way, talking to his girl-toys. It took everything in me to not make things awkward by looking in his direction, but for the split second I looked that way, he was already eyeing me down. I pretended to not notice, continuing into the coffee shop line as I would do normally. The line was fairly short. I looked down at my phone to distract myself until it was my turn to order. “I am sorry (Y/N)” a familiar voice says behind me, him lightly grazing my shoulder.

My eyes immediately snap to the owner of the voice. His brown eyes were staring directly into mine as if he could tell exactly what I was thinking just by looking at me. And I know he can. ‘Hey’ he seems to say, flashing me the smallest of smirks as his hand rests on the counter to my left. I scoff in disbelief. He really is serious now isn’t he. I try to ignore him and continue with my order, but Sunghoon stops me in my tracks. My heart starts hammering harder in my chest as I glance around to make sure no one overheard. “Hey (Y/N),” he repeats, giving me his infamous smirk. “I really am sorry” he continues. He’s watching me with a curious tilt to his head as he waits for my response.

“Can I buy you a drink? Maybe we can talk some more?” For a fraction of a moment, it’s hard to believe what’s happening.

“Whatever you are trying to do, I don’t want any part of it” I said sternly, trying to shoo him away. I know he could see the annoyance on my face but that wasn’t enough to get him to leave. “Please, I want to make things right” he begged with a hint of charm in his voice. He reaches out to hold my wrist but this time instead of swatting him away, I let him. If anyone deserves an apology it should be me. He takes a step closer to me, tilting his head slightly. “Fine I guess, but do not expect to get anything out of me” I agreed hesitantly. His facial expression completely changed from worried to… relieved? We ordered together in line while I tried my best to ignore him. His scent was a distraction. It was captivating. It was comparable to mohagany and mint. Admittedly, he is tall and handsome, even when we were in middle school he had always been cute. But I would never say that out loud. Eventually, his named was called and we both went up to grab our drinks. “Thank you Sunghoon” I said while looking down, trying to get out of the situation as soon a possible. “Wait” he says before I get to far away. “I will text you” he added. I half way smiled and walked away.

~~~~~

At lunch, I found myself leaning against Yuqi as we sat at one of our tables outside. “How do you feel?” she asked. “Better” I admitted. “It’ll take some getting used to, but I think I’m doing better” She nodded, seemingly satisfied by my reply.

“Yuqi?” I spoke again once I had my full attention back on her. She turned her attention towards me expectantly.

“Why don’t you give him another chance?” she sighed, rolling her neck around. “I mean, he seems like he is genuinely trying to make it up to you.”

“Yes he is putting in the effort now, but the pain that he put me through doesn’t just go away in an instant, it will take time for me to trust him”

“I understand” she muttered.

~~~~~

A few days had passed but I had never received a message from Sunghoon. Maybe he forgot or maybe he was scared…. I don’t know. But I can’t help but to think that I was maybe looking forward to that message. Yuqi was right, maybe he does deserve another chance. The library was my number one studying location. It was quiet, I could focus, and nobody bothers me. I actually have some time to myself. I have tested out every study area here and the to floor is by far my favorite. I press the 5 on the elevator control pad, and as the doors start closing, someone’s hand is placed between the doors, causing them to shoot back open. It was Sunghoon. I awkwardly scoot to the edge of the confined space to make sure there was more than enough room between us. His eyes light up when he realizes I was the one in the elevator.

“Would it be a problem if I rode with you?” he asked hesitatingly with an awkward smile.

“No, why would there be a problem?” I replied quickly. There was an awkward silence for a few seconds after my answer, and then I heard the elevator ding and the doors slowly start closing again. God, being around him gave me mixed emotions. His aura is so captivating, but his personality is the opposite. And not to mention that mohagany scent again. We rode to the fifth floor in total silence and exited the elevator once it stopped. When we both made way out of the elevator to walk our own directions, He gently grazed my shoulder and said “Good luck with finals” and walked the other direction.

-

Later that same evening while I was still on the library, my phone pinged with a new notification.

prksnghn02: Hey are you available?

prksnghn02: I know I said I was sorry but I really want you to know how I feel. I can’t do it over text.

I think this is the message that I have been waiting to see. I would appreciate to see him and have him fully apologize, though I don’t think this is the right time. It’s the middle of finals week and lord knows I am already struggling as is. I look up from my phone, observing my surroundings, and spot Sunghoon across the almost empty room lounging on a library bean-bag. Alone. That’s a first considering his royalty equivalent status on campus. He was clearly looking at me when I opened his message.

yourusername: Hey, sorry. I really need to study for this Sociology final. I can definitely carve out a time to meet next week.

I look up at him and point at my phone, making a frowny face and his expression mirrors mine.

prksnghn02: Who is the professor? I aced my sociology class I took over the summer. If you need any help lmk.

He looks at me with a thumbs up. His offer seems tempting, but what would I do? Sit there and hear him lecture me? It would already be hard enough to pay attention given how his arms are looking in that black fitted top.

yourusername: I will think about it.

I try to focus on my sociology notes, but my eyes keep drifting back to Sunghoon. He's still lounging on the bean bag, but now he has a textbook open on his lap. Every so often, he glances up, catching my eye before we both quickly look away. The tension is palpable, even from across the room. I sigh, running a hand through my hair. This is getting ridiculous. I'm here to study, not to play this weird game of cat and mouse with my former bully turned... what? Potential friend? The thought makes me uncomfortable. I make a split second decision on impulse and grab my phone, maybe regretting my decision later.

yourusername: Okay fine, come help me.

I witness Sunghoon look at his phone and shoot up out of his seat within the span of 3 seconds. Impressive. My heart hammered a frantic rhythm against my ribs as Sunghoon practically skidded to a stop in front of my desk. It was a stark contrast to his usual nonchalance. A smile tugged at the corner of his lips, and for a moment, I was back in middle school, his laughter echoing in the halls, the same laughter that used to sting.

“So, sociology huh?” he said with the most awkward tone possible. “What do you need help with” he continues, signaling his hand towards my messy notes. My notebook has definitely seen better days. I sighed, shoving my phone into the abyss of my backpack.

"Everything feels like gibberish. Professor Ramirez throws these massive lectures at us, and it all just blends together." Surprised laughter rumbled out of him.

"Ramirez? Yeah, he can be a bit much. But trust me, sociology isn't actually that complicated. Let's see your notes." Tentatively, I slid my well-worn notebook across the desk. He flipped through the pages, his brow furrowing in concentration. The silence stretched, broken only by the soft rustle of turning paper. I snuck a peek at him. His features were softened by a focus I wouldn't have expected. "Okay," he finally said, looking up. "This isn't so bad. You've got the basic concepts down. I think you're just getting overwhelmed by the details."

Relief flooded me. Maybe I wasn't completely incompetent after all. He settled into the chair across from me, his arm brushing mine for a moment as he reached for a pen. He continued to sort through my notes, trying to piece together what I may not be understanding. He was surprisingly patient with me, and even created examples for me to try and understand better. Not to mention that I couldn’t keep my eyes off of him as he spoke. His black hair falling loosely in front of his dark brown eyes and black glasses was so sexy.

"So basically, social stratification is like the ranking system within a society?" I summarized, feeling a flicker of accomplishment. Sunghoon grinned, a genuine smile that reached his eyes. "Exactly! See, you were getting it all along." He paused, then reached for a specific page in my notes.

"Now, let's talk about power structures and how they influence social mobility…" Time melted away as Sunghoon patiently guided me through the sociological knowledge. I peppered him with questions, surprised by my own comfort level.

He answered them all with good humor and a surprising depth of knowledge that made him seem worlds apart from the bully I knew in middle school and the jock he is now. I looked at his face once again, admiring the way he furrowed his eye brows when he concentrated. I am snapped out of my trance with

“What?” Sunghoon questioned me, tilting his face to the side. I couldn’t even comprehend what had happened until a second or two later.

“Nothing! It’s nothing. Go on with what you were saying” I averted my eyes towards the table to try and hide the blood in my cheeks. “Heh, Okay….” he chuckles fiddling with the ring on his finger. He pauses for a few seconds and picks up with “You should get home soon. You don’t wanna have late nights, right?”

He looks me dead in the eye as he says this, a hint of playfulness in his gaze. I glanced at my phone, startled to see it was already 1 AM. We'd been studying for hours without realizing it. The library, usually bustling with stressed students, was now eerily quiet.

"Oh wow, I didn't realize how late it got," I mumbled, hastily gathering my notes. Sunghoon stretched, his shirt riding up slightly. I pretended not to notice.

"Yeah, time flies when you're having fun with sociology, right?" he said sarcastically. I rolled my eyes, but couldn't help the small smile that tugged at my lips. "Right, because power structures are just a barrel of laughs." As we packed up our things, Sunghoon hesitated, then asked, "Hey, um, would you like me to walk you back to your dorm? It's pretty late." I paused, considering. The old me would have immediately refused, not wanting to spend an extra second with him.

But now... "Sure," I found myself saying. "That would be nice." We stepped out into the cool night air, the campus very quiet around us. For a moment, we walked in silence, the only sound our footsteps on the pavement.

"So," Sunghoon started, breaking the silence. "Did you find the study session helpful?" I nodded, surprised by my own honesty.

"Yeah, actually. You explain things... differently than I expected." He raised an eyebrow.

"Different good or different bad?"

"Different good," I admitted. "You're more... patient than I thought you'd be." Sunghoon chuckled softly. "Well, don't sound so surprised. Im not just a handsome face ya know.” I felt a retort forming on my lips, but bit it back.

“Yeah yeah, don’t flatter yourself.” As we walked, I couldn't help but sneak glances at him. In the soft glow of the street lamps, he looked... different. Softer somehow. Less like the arrogant boy I'd built up in my mind and more like... well, just a guy. "You know," he said suddenly, his voice quiet. "I meant what I said before. About being sorry." I felt my body tense. "Sunghoon, we don't have to-"

"No, please," he interrupted, stopping in his tracks. I turned to face him, surprised by the earnestness in his eyes. "I was a jerk in middle school. More than a jerk. I was cruel, and I've regretted it for years. I just... I want you to know that. I am sorry." I stood there, stunned. This vulnerability was so at odds with the Sunghoon I thought I knew.

"I... thank you," were the only words that were able to come out of my mouth. - I turned to face towards him as we reached the enterance of my dorm building. “Okay, I guess I can take it from here” I said, grabbing my key card out of my backpack.

“Goodnight, Sunghoon.” I entered the building and the door was already halfway closed before Sunghoon grabbed it and called out behind me, "Wait!” I stopped mid step and turned to meet his curious gaze, confused by what he could possibly want to say. I gave him a questioning look as he approached me slowly. His hands fidgeted nervously, and he took one last glance around, making sure no one was watching before reaching up to touch my cheek hesitantly. His thumb brushed the area under my eye lightly, his hand moving downwards slowly until he rested his palm flat on my jaw. I was somehow okay with this, despite the butterflies in my stomach.

My heart thudded loudly against my chest as I stared at his hand resting gently on my skin, unable to tear my gaze away from his. There was something magnetic about the way his eyes bore into me with an intensity I have never felt. “Have a good night, (Y/N)” he said softly, grazing my bottom lip with his thumb. He leaned down slowly while gazing into my eyes, a soft smile gracing his lips. My breath hitched as he brought his other hand up and cradled my cheek, brushing some loose strands of hair out of my face. “You too, Sunghoon”

~~~~~

The end of finals week had finally come and I am not exaggerating when I say that this is the most relieved I have ever been in my life. I was lounging on my bed scrolling through tik tok and I saw a message pop up at the top of my screen.

prksnghn02: Hey! A few of us are having a small get-together at the frat house to celebrate surviving finals. You and Yuqi should come.

I stared at the message, my thumb hovering over the keyboard. A month ago, I would've immediately declined. But now… things were different. The study session with Sunghoon, our late-night walk, the way he'd touched my face before saying goodnight - it all swirled in my mind, a confusing mix of old resentment and new… something.

yourusername: Let me check with Yuqi. What time?

His response was almost immediate.

prksnghn02: Around 8? It's just a few people, nothing crazy. Promise it won't be like last time.

I couldn't help but smile at that. The last party had been a turning point, in a way.

yourusername: Okay, I'll let you know.

I rolled over, dialing Yuqi's number. She picked up on the second ring.

"Please tell me you're calling to drag me out of this post-finals funk," she groaned.

I laughed. "Actually, yeah. Sunghoon invited us to a small thing at the frat house. You in?"

There was a pause on the other end. "Sunghoon, huh? You two seem to be getting along better."

I could hear the smile in her voice. "We're… working on it," I admitted. "So, you coming or what?"

"Obviously," she said. "I'll be at yours in an hour. We need to talk about this Sunghoon situation, by the way."

I groaned. "There's no 'situation', Yuqi."

"Uh-huh. Sure. See you soon!"

She hung up before I could protest further. I flopped back onto my bed, staring at the ceiling.

An hour later, Yuqi was sprawled on my bed, watching me rummage through my closet.

"So," she said, drawing out the word. "You and Sunghoon, huh?"

I threw a shirt at her. "There's no 'me and Sunghoon'. We're just… I don't know. Not enemies anymore, I guess."

Yuqi sat up, her expression serious. "Look, I know he was awful to you in middle school. But people change, you know? And he seems to be really trying."

I sighed, sitting down next to her. "I know. It's just… complicated."

She bumped my shoulder with hers. "Life's complicated. Doesn't mean you can't give it a chance."

I nodded, not trusting myself to speak. Yuqi always had a way of cutting through my defenses.

"Now," she said, her tone lightening. "Let's find you something cute to wear. Just because it's not a 'situation' doesn't mean you can't look hot."

I rolled my eyes, but let her pull me back to the closet.The frat house was quieter than I'd ever seen it. No pulsing music, no crowds of people. Just the soft murmur of conversation and laughter drifting from the back patio. Sunghoon met us at the door, his face lighting up when he saw us. "Hey! You made it." he said, ushering us inside. His eyes lingered on me for a moment, and I felt a flutter in my stomach. "Drinks are in the kitchen, we're all out back."

As we followed him through the house, I couldn't help but notice how different he seemed here, in his element. Relaxed, open, a far cry from the popular Sunghoon I was used to seeing on campus. He was wearing a simple black t-shirt and jeans, but somehow he made it look effortlessly attractive. The back patio was strung with fairy lights, casting a warm glow over the small group gathered there. I recognized a few faces from classes, but it was indeed a much smaller crowd than the usual frat parties.

Yuqi immediately gravitated towards a group she knew, leaving me standing awkwardly by the door. Sunghoon appeared at my side, two red cups in hand. "Here," he said, offering me one. "It's just punch, but fair warning - Heeseung made it, so it's probably stronger than it tastes." I took a sip, the sweetness masking the unmistakable burn of alcohol. "Thanks for inviting us," I said, surprised by how much I meant it. Sunghoon's smile was soft, almost shy. "I'm glad you came. I wasn't sure if you would." "Honestly? I wasn't sure either," I admitted. He nodded, understanding in his eyes. "Well, I'm glad you did. Come on, let me introduce you to some people." As the night wore on, I found myself relaxing more and more. The punch was indeed strong, but the warm buzz it provided was pleasant.

Sunghoon stayed close, always making sure I was included in conversations, laughing at my jokes, his hand occasionally brushing against mine in a way that seemed both accidental and deliberate. I found myself studying him when he wasn't looking. The way his eyes crinkled when he laughed, the gestures he made when he was explaining something he was passionate about. It was hard to reconcile this Sunghoon with the boy who had tormented me in middle school. At some point, Yuqi caught my eye from across the patio and gave me a not-so-subtle thumbs up. I rolled my eyes at her, but I couldn't help the smile that subtly appears on my face.

As the night progressed, people started to drift away in twos and threes. Yuqi had gotten into an intense discussion about some TV show with a guy from her psych class, leaving Sunghoon and me alone on a small bench near the edge of the patio. The fairy lights cast a soft glow on his features, and I found myself staring longer than I should have. "You know," Sunghoon said, his words slightly slurred, "I never thought we'd be here like this." I raised an eyebrow. "What, drunk on your frat house patio?" He laughed, the sound warm and genuine. "No, I mean... talking. Like friends."

His hand found mine on the bench between us, his fingers intertwining with mine. The touch sent a jolt through me, but I didn't pull away. "I was such an ass to you in middle school," he continued, his voice dropping low. "I... I didn't know how to deal with how I felt about you back then." I froze, my heart suddenly pounding. "What do you mean?" Sunghoon turned to face me, his eyes intense even in their alcohol-glazed state. "I had the biggest crush on you," he admitted. "But I was too stupid and insecure to know how to handle it. So I lashed out instead." I sat there, stunned.

The Sunghoon I knew in middle school, the one who had made my life miserable, had a crush on me? It didn't make sense, and yet... "That doesn't excuse what I did," he continued, his thumb tracing circles on the back of my hand. "Nothing excuses that. But I want you to know how sorry I am. And how glad I am that you're giving me a chance to make it right."

I looked at our intertwined hands, then back up at Sunghoon's face. The vulnerability in his expression took my breath away. "I... I don't know what to say," I whispered. "You don't have to say anything," he murmured, leaning in slightly. "I just wanted you to know." We sat there for a moment, the air between us charged with possibility. Then, without thinking, I leaned in, closing the distance between us. Our lips met softly, hesitantly at first. Then Sunghoon's free hand came up to cup my cheek, deepening the kiss.

It was sweet and a little clumsy, tasting of punch with a hint of alcohol. His lips were softer than I'd imagined - not that I'd been imagining it, of course. When we broke apart, I could feel the heat in my cheeks. Sunghoon's eyes were wide, a mix of surprise and something else I couldn't quite name.

"I... wow," he breathed, his thumb gently caressing my cheek. Before I could respond, the patio door slid open and Yuqi's voice rang out. "Y/N? You out here?" Sunghoon and I sprang apart, but not before Yuqi caught sight of us. Her facial expression completely changed, a knowing smirk spreading across her face.

"Sorry, am I interrupting something?" she asked, her tone teasing. I stood up quickly, nearly losing my balance. Sunghoon steadied me with a hand on my arm, the touch sending another jolt through me. "We were just... talking," I managed to say, knowing how unconvincing it sounded. Yuqi's grin widened. "Uh-huh. 'Talking.' Got it. Well, hate to break up this... conversation, but it's getting late. We should probably head out." I nodded, suddenly feeling very sober. "Right. Yeah. Let's go."

As we made our way back through the house, I could feel Sunghoon's eyes on me. At the front door, he caught my hand. "Text me when you get home safe?" he asked, his voice low. I nodded, words not being able to leave my mouth. He squeezed my hand once before letting go. - The walk back to the dorms was quiet, Yuqi mercifully holding back her questions until we were safely in my room. "Okay," she said, flopping onto my bed. "Spill. Everything. Now." I sank into my desk chair, my mind replaying the kiss over and over. "I... I don't even know where to start," I admitted.

Yuqi's expression softened. "Start at the beginning. And don't leave anything out."

~~~~~

Going over to Sunghoons frat house became a frequent thing over the winter break. About twice a week I would go with Yuqi and kick back with a few of his friends, the same ones that were there the first time.

During those times, we'd always end up hanging out in Sunghoons backyard, or playing in his pool. He definitely acted a lot different around his friends than I expected. More relaxed, open, less guarded. In turn he opened up to me a bit too.

“If I beat you in a round of pool, you have take a shot with me” Sunghoon said chuckling, nudging his elbow against my arm. “Come on, that’s fair!”

“I guess, but what do I get it I win?”

Sunghoon narrowed his eyes suspiciously. “You know what, I can think of something…” He moved closer to me, the tip of his nose inches away from mine. A shiver ran down my spine as I tried to resist the urge to pull away. Instead, I remained still, watching nervously as his mouth slowly drew closer and closer. “I think you might like it” he said teasingly.

“I guess I should just let you win then” I sighed sarcastically, trying to ignore the butterflies built up in my stomach.

He scoffs “I promise, sweetheart, I don’t bite” he said, moving back just enough so he could meet my eyes. His voice was low and husky, sending a ripple of heat through my body.

“So, what kind of shot?” I asked lightly, trying to ignore the way my voice shook as I spoke.

“I think I have some Don Julio” he mused, running a hand along the back of his neck.

Sunghoon it first to break all of the pool balls apart, declaring him as solids. Drinking beer between each of our turns and chatting about family and work, Sunghoon was a lot better at pool than he originally let on, because soon enough he had only 2 solid balls left, while I still had 5 stripes.

I was expecting him to have already won at this point. When he set his cue on the edge, lining up to hit one of the solids into a hole, the 8 ball shoots across the board, into the hole closest to me.

“Aw shit, I guess you won” He said with a fake defeated look.

I laughed, setting my bottle aside. “Looks like it. Thanks for letting me have a couple extra rounds” I said, winking at him. I missed my cue stick by mere centimeters, but didn’t care. My eyes were locked on Sunghoon; his hair stuck up everywhere, his skin glistening with sweat after his game, his shirt clung tightly to his frame.

A loud bang echoed off the walls, making us both jump slightly. Sunghoon’s eyes snapped towards the window behind me, his eyebrows furrowing in concern. “Someone just slammed the garage door shut” he whispered. “Did they close up for the night?”

We had spent so much time playing pool, we didn’t realize that slowly, one by one, people started to go home. This meaning that Yuqi probably caught a ride home with someone and the only people left here are the 3 frat guys staying in the house over the break.

“It’s getting late, I should probably call an Uber” I said, rubbing my eyes for focus.

“Why leave so soon? Doing Uber this late at night could be dangerous, you never know what kind of people could be out there.”

“What other option do I have? Yuqi went home already” I replied, grabbing my phone.

“You can stay here, you can sleep on my bed and I will set up a bed on the floor” he offered.

“I don’t know if that is the best idea” I muttered, staring at my feet.

“Just sleep here. Don’t waste money on an Uber, and I promise I can take great care of you.” he urged me, placing his hand under my chin so that I would finally look at him. “Do you really believe that I would let you get into a strangers car right now?”

I hesitated before nodding. “Fine, but only because I trust you.”

~

We pack up all of our stuff from outside, including my purse and all of the extra alcohol. There are so many room in the frat house and I have never been upstairs, I have no idea which one is Sunghoons. As the two of us climb the stairs up to his room, we both silently agree not to mention the previous events from the other night.

Sunghoon doesn’t know why I kissed him, And I don’t know why he kissed me. Even though he did tell me a little about the reason behind our relationship, it wouldn’t matter, he was too far gone for it to change anything anyway.

The moment we step into his room, he tosses his backpack onto the floor and gestures to the large queen sized bed sitting in the corner of the room.

“I didn’t bring anything to sleep in, I can’t sleep wearing jeans and a tank top” I said, gesturing to my jeans.

“Don’t worry about it, I can lend you something” he said, walking over to a laundry basket of clothes lying on the floor near the wardrobe. “I haven’t gotten the chance to put up my laundry, let me find something” he explains, rummaging through the basket.

He pulls out a large black t-shirt and some basketball shorts. “Here, try these on” and walked over, handing them to me, a slight smile tugging at the edge of his lips.

“Look away!” I playfully shouted while waving my hand to shoo him. “

“Oh my gosh, okay” he covers his eyes like a cartoon character.

Luckily I was wearing some spandex shorts and a sports bra underneath, so even if he did sneak a peek, which I’m sure he did, nothing too important would have been exposed. On him the clothes look normal size, but on me, the shirt fit like a dress and the shorts touched half way down my shins. “I guess I have no choice” I shrugged.

I crawl into his bed while he went to fetch an extra blanket for me out of his closet. At this point, he was already in his sleep attire. No shirt and some basketball shorts. It was hard to concentrate when he was standing there wearing nothing but shorts. I admit that maybe I was staring a bit longer than appropriate.

“You like what you see?” he says in a cocky tone, chuckling at my embarrassment.

“Shut up, you are so annoying” I scoff and roll my eyes, laying back down on the bed.

“Haha okay…” he smirks as he stands up from the closed with the blanket in his hand. “Hopefully this will keep you warm enough” he said, covering me with the big piece of fabric.

“Thank you, Sunghoon” I said, turning over to attempt to catch some sleep. He set up a little bed on the floor with a blanket and a pillow right next to the bed and layer down as well.

After sometime of just listening to the sound of the crickets outside, the quiet noises of the street, cars passing by, the occasional chirp of a bird. The atmosphere was rather peaceful, comfortable almost. I couldn't help the small smile forming on my face as I lay my head on my arm.

My brain kept drifting away from sleep, my thoughts constantly drifting back to Sunghoon. My heart rate was rising with every second that passed, I tried desperately to calm myself down, not wanting to give any indication that I was starting to get aroused. The more I listened to the sounds outside, the more I felt the overwhelming desire to be wrapped up in his arms. Just to feel him hold me.

I sigh deeply, rolling over onto my side and facing him. The soft glow of moonlight illuminating the entire room, casting light patterns on his sleeping features. If this was any other day, I would definitely stare at him until dawn, taking in every minute detail of him.

I scooted over to the edge of the bed, just close enough for me to nudge Sunghoon with my foot. “Hoon, are you awake” I whispered.

His eyes opened slowly, adjusting to the brightness of the moonlight leaking through the blinds. “Yeah” he clears his throat. “Why?”

“Can you lay with me?” I whispered again.

He stared at me for a second, trying to understand what was going through my mind. Eventually, he crawled onto the bed, lying down next to me. His body was hot against mine, making goosebumps erupt throughout my skin, but the feeling was comforting nevertheless. We laid like that in silence for a few moments, simply enjoying each other's presence.

Eventually, it became too awkward and I had to move closer into Sunghoon, cuddling up next to him. “I like this” I say quietly, resting my head in the crook of his neck, inhaling his faint scent. He chuckled slightly, positioning himself to where his fingers could comb though my hair.

I mumble, wrapping my arm around his torso. His fingers stopped their ministrations then, hesitating for a moment. I looked up at him from my position on his chest, curious as to what made him stop. I met his deep brown eyes that were focused solely on me. His gaze was soft, yet intimidating at the same time. Slowly, carefully, he lifted my head off his body and held it between his hands. Then he brought his lips to meet mine softly.

He pulled me in closer, gently running his fingertips along my jawline, making my heartbeat pick up in pace. His kisses were slow and sweet, the most tender kiss I've ever had. After several seconds of pure bliss, he pulled away slowly, watching me as if waiting for some sort of reaction. When my eyes fluttered open I met with his eyes, gazing deeply into each others’. A smile formed on my lips, making Sunghoon lean in to reconnect our lips again.

He placed his hands on the sides of my neck, holding me close to him, deepening the kiss, our tongues intertwining in a passionate dance. Our bodies pressed closely together, moving together rhythmically. His hands lifted up my oversized shorts and began roaming across my bare thighs, tracing up the hem of my shirt. We kept getting tangled in each other’s clothing as we continued kissing.

He reached my breasts, pushing up my sports bra to give them an affectionate squeeze, causing me to gasp in response. My hands moved down from his shoulders and ran up the backs of his arms to his neck, pulling on his short hairs slightly. Pulling on the strands of hair caused him to release a low growl and deepen the kiss, pulling his tongue into my mouth. Suddenly I felt his teeth graze my bottom lip, causing me to whimper slightly at the unexpected pain. When he released my lower lip, he sucked on it, sucking on it harder and harder with his sharp canine teeth. “Fuck…” I moan, gripping tightly onto the ends of his dark brown locks.

He took the opportunity to slide his hands under my shirt, rubbing his thumbs over my nipples lightly, causing my stomach muscles to tense up involuntarily. A slight smirk crept onto his lips as he noticed this, but then he proceeded to push the crop top further up on my shoulders before placing soft gentle kisses along my collar bone. He sprinkled kissed on my shoulders and chest and then moved down towards my waistline, placing soft soft kisses along my belly button. His hand started to work its way downwards, slowly caressing the insides of my thighs.

He latched one of my nipples into his mouth, gently suckling the tight swollen bud of flesh with his teeth and tongue. As his hand reached down and slid his middle finger along the underside of my left thigh, causing me to grind against his hand.

He trailed his hand back up to the bottom of my shirts and bunched it up in his hand “Can I take this off?” he leaned next to my ear and whispered. My breath hitched at how sensual he sounded.

“Please” I managed to speak out. He didn’t reply immediately, only gave me a reassuring smile before pulling it over my head, only leaving my bra. His lips found their way back up to mine, sending a surge of electricity through me. His hands worked their way to bottom of my bra, lifting it up and throwing it to the side as well. The cool air on my bare stomach and chest suddenly sent tingles all over my body, sending shivers down my spine and goosebumps all over my skin. He smiled at my reaction, continuing to caress my inner thigh.

“Is it okay if I take these off too?” he whispered, grazing the waistband of my shorts.

I let go of his arms and nodded my head yes, watching his expression change from relaxed to excited. I watched him pull those off and discard them as well, leaving only my thong on. “I hope this is okay” he smiled. He was still looking at me with those intense eyes, making it difficult for me to breathe properly.

He removed the last piece of clothing from me, both my spandex and the shorts he gave me, revealing my beautiful skin and perfectly plump curves underneath. He took a few seconds to appreciate every inch of my body before sliding his slim fingers between my legs. Instinctively my knees fell apart slightly, allowing him access to my core which caused his eyes to darken even more. As he gently traced circles around my bud, sending me into complete ecstasy, I moaned loudly, moaning in pleasure as my hips began grinding into his finger tips.

“God, you’re so pretty” he whispered, trailing kisses along my cheek. I bit my bottom lip to suppress the moans coming out of my mouth as he continued to stroke the wetness inside of my thighs. “So perfect.”

He spread my wetness all over his fingers and slid one finger inside of my desperate hole. At first, he started slowly, his thumb circling my clit while his middle finger slid in and out of my warm opening, slowly increasing the amount of pressure until I was gripping down onto his fingers with all of my strength. He increased the speed of his movements, adding another finger, pumping them hard into me. I closed my eyes and arched my back, trying my best to keep a good grip on his fingers.

“Shit, you’re so wet angel” he groans. He took his hand away to pull off his own shorts, with his boxers. His dick spring free, tip raging and dripping with precum. It was big, a lot bigger than I had expected.

I take all of his length into my fist as he continues contact with my folds. “Fuck, that feels good, baby” he says under his breath. I collect spit in my mouth and layer his tip and slide my hand up and down slowly.

I feel a familiar knot forming in my stomach as he keeps a consistent pace pumping his finger into my gushing pussy. “Agh yess” I moan on his cock, feeling the burning sensation building up. He leans down to place a tender kiss on the back of my shoulder, his warm breath fanning my sensitive skin, causing my back arch even higher. "Let go babygirl"he murmurs against my shoulder.

I let my hand rest against his erection, stroking him slowly, feeling the tip get longer by the moment. Soon enough, I can no longer contain myself as I let the orgasm rip out of me. His name came spilling out of my mouth, followed by a loud moan “Fuck Sunghoon, just like that.” I continue to hold on to him as the wave of pleasure takes over me, feeling my muscles start to seize up and my vision starting to blur.

As I'm regaining my composure, he pulls out of me, bringing his fingers up to his mouth. “You taste so good, princess” he praises, with sweat droplets forming in his forehead.My face turns red with embarrassment. I cover my face with my palms as I try to control my breathing. Sunghoon chuckles and grabs my wrists, pulling my hands away from my blushing face and places them on his cheeks instead. “Don’t be embarrassed, babygirl. That was hot” he says. My blush gets stronger by the second.

“Let me get you cleaned up” he suggested, getting out of the bed to go to his bathroom where he kept his extra cloths. He came back with a small smile on his face. He runs the rag between my legs and said “I am really happy you decided to spend the night”

“Me too Sunghoon” my smile only visible by the moonlight. He went back into the bathroom to put the cloth into the dirty clothes hamper.

“Now come here…” He brings his lips to meet mine once more. He wraps his arms around my sore body, making my face bury into his chest. Our bare skin resting against eachother was so relaxing. His skin was soft, and he was perfectly toned to my liking. He runs his fingers through my hair and begins to massage my scalp, making my whole body tremble. “It’s really late, sweetheart, let’s get some rest” he whispers and kisses my forehead, then rests his chin on the top of my head. As I lay there in Sunghoons embrace, feeling the warmth radiating off him, my eyes gradually fall shut.

-

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[imaginedisish]

Poker Face (Logan Howlett x Fem!Reader)

A/N: OKAY! Here is the strip poker fic! This is not a request, but there are a few requests I really like, so I'm most likely going to write one of those next! Could not waste the opportunity to use Lady Gaga's "Poker Face" as the inspiration here. I hope you guys enjoy!

Summary: You and Logan are alone in the mansion for the evening, and after a few drinks, your game of Blackjack turns into strip poker...

Warnings: 18+ Sexually Explicit Content MINORS DNI!!! Oral (f!receiving), Fingering, Unprotected PIV, multiple orgasms, softdom!Logan(?), cocky!Logan, alcohol consumption (neither reader nor Logan get drunk), feelings, friends to lovers, strip poker!, f!reader/afab reader, cursing, def some grammatical errors (proofread this one between weird times), I think that's it!

Word Count: 4,025 how did I do that???

The house is empty. Quiet. It’s so strange, almost eerie, but honestly welcome. You can’t remember the last time you were ever so alone. Not lonely—alone. Comfortably and peacefully alone. 

Scott, Jean, and Storm took most of the children off on an overnight camping trip, while Hank, Kurt, and Charles were on a mission with some of the older mutants. Rogue and Gambit were out somewhere, leaving you and Logan in the mansion alone. 

You’re sitting at the kitchen table, back to the window, looking out at the empty room. Everything is untouched—neatly put away. You know things will be back to normal by tomorrow afternoon—dishes in the sink, shoes all over the floor, kids shouting down the halls. But for now, there’s nothing. No disruptions. No—

“Oh, hey,” Logan mumbles, stepping through the doorway and into the kitchen. “Didn’t know you were in here.”

You smile, trying your best not to let your eyes flit up and down his body. He’s wearing one of his tight beaters and a pair of jeans. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t want him—if you said that being alone in the mansion with him wasn’t somewhat overwhelming. You’ve wanted Logan since the day you joined the X-Men, just a few months ago. And while you’ve become close friends, you know it’ll never progress further than that. 

“Wanna join me?” You ask, tilting your head to the chair across from you. 

Logan smirks and nods. He walks to the fridge, swings open the French doors, and reaches inside. “Got something for us, actually,” he says, glasses clinking as he rummages through the fridge. He pulls out whatever he’s looking for, turning around, and revealing a 6-pack of beer. 

“No way!” You shout excitedly. “Logan Howlett, breaking the rules as always.”

He sits down across from you, placing the beers in the center of the table. “You know you love it,” he husks, grinning widely. 

You can feel the heat rising to your chest. He’s right. “I do,” you whisper, hoping he doesn’t catch on to the implications of your words. If he does, he doesn’t show it. He grabs a beer by its neck, pops off the cap with ease, and holds the bottle out towards you. Your fingers brush his as you take the beer from him, his hands warm and surprisingly soft. The contact is fleeting, effervescent. You wish he could touch you again. 

You bring the bottle to your lips, the cold beer a distraction from your all-too-hot thoughts. You watch as Logan pulls a bottle for himself, his muscles flexing as he removes the cap. He brings the bottle to his mouth and knocks it back, his throat bobbing as he swallows. 

“So…” You trail off, doing your all to ignore the way his tongue swipes across his upper lip as he places the beer back down on the table. You take another swig of your beer, ready to down the entire thing just to give yourself the confidence to say something. “D-did you wanna do anything?” You take another big gulp. 

Logan smiles. “Not sure,” he says, taking a sip. “You got anything in mind, princess?”

Your heart flutters at the familiar nickname. You rub a finger up and down the beer bottle, streaking the condensation. “We could play a game,” you offer, your eyes finding his. “Cards?”

Logan hums in affirmation as he knocks his beer bottle back again. He’s already practically finished. “You wanna play Blackjack?” He asks, taking a final sip before standing up and walking over to the kitchen island. He rifles through a couple of drawers before finding a pack of cards. He sits back down across from you, grabbing another beer and cracking it open. 

“Sure,” you answer, watching as Logan slips the cards from their box and expertly shuffles them. He thumbs the cards, dexterously letting them slide through his long fingers. He deals you the first card, face up, and then does the same for himself. You have a king of hearts, and Logan has a five of diamonds. He deals again, and you’re given a nine of clubs. It’s a good hand. Better than Logan’s, so far. He deals himself another card, looking at it briefly before putting it face down on the table. 

He smirks up at you. “Hit, or stay?” He asks.

You roll your eyes. “Stay, obviously.” He shakes his head, smiling as he deals himself another card. 

“Well, princess,” he says, showing you all three of his cards now. Five of diamonds, queen of hearts, and six of spades. “Looks like I won.” He’s smug as he grabs your cards and shuffles them back into the deck. 

You scoff and let him deal you in again.

You’ve only had two drinks, but there’s something about being with Logan that makes you feel like you’re drunk. You’ve been playing Blackjack for almost forty-five minutes now, round after round. Despite this being a game of chance, it seems like Logan wins far more often than you do. 

And yet, something gives you the sudden confidence to up the ante. 

“Lo?” You ask, taking a swig of your third beer, now. He looks up at you and hums, dealing the next round. You lean across the table. “What if we…” you trail off. “Made this more exciting?” 

Logan looks across the table under hooded eyes. You can sense the sudden shift in his expression, and you know he can sense the suggestiveness in your voice. The corner of his mouth turns up—a sly, half smile. “Exciting how, princess?”

You’re nervous now—all talk and no action. “Maybe we could bet somehow?” You offer, but Logan knows that’s not truly what you mean. He cocks his head, eyes narrowing.

And then he says exactly what you’re thinking—as if he can read your mind. “What about strip poker?” 

Your eyes widen and you swallow harshly. Logan is focused on you, still folding the cards into each other. You finally nod your head. “Sure, sounds fun.” 

Logan quickly deals the first cards. You have an ace, and Logan has a ten of diamonds. He places another card down for you—seven of clubs—and another face down for himself. 

“Hit or stay?” He asks, his eyes set on yours. He’s leaning closer to you than he was before. 

You take a deep breath. “Stay,” you answer, your voice trembling ever so slightly now. 

Logan shakes his head. “Wouldn’t have mattered anyway,” he says, flipping over his second card. It’s an ace of hearts. He collects your cards without another word, but his eyes are still glued to you. 

You bite your lip nervously and decide to tug away your sweatshirt. You’re wearing a thin tank top underneath, much to your relief. Logan’s eyes flit up and down your body, drinking you in. 

You drape the sweatshirt across the back of your chair, your eyes narrowing in Logan’s direction. “You have to be cheating,” you accuse sarcastically.

Logan grins ear to ear as he deals again, looking down at the table. “Just lucky,” he says, the words stopping your heart. “Very lucky.” He looks back up at you. Your breath catches in your throat. 

There’s a four of hearts in front of you this time. You roll your eyes at the low card. Logan—naturally—has a jack of diamonds. He places another card in front of you, a nine of clubs, and another face down for himself.

“Hit,” you mutter before he can ask the question. He places a seven of diamonds in front of you and shakes his head. He reveals his other card: an eight of spades. You smile widely, self-satisfied as you grab your beer by the neck and take a long swig. You lean back in your chair, watching as Logan pulls his beater up and over his head. 

He’s perfect, you think to yourself. Sure, he’s all chiseled abs and muscles, but he truly is beautiful. And you hope he knows it. “Happy now?” He asks, dealing the next hand. 

Heat spreads across your chest and down to your stomach. Your clothes feel tight, itchy. You try your best to ignore the way Logan makes you feel—to ignore the way you long to press your thighs together for some sort of friction. You—very obviously—are failing horrifically. 

“Hit, or stay?” Logan asks. You’re so distracted by him that you completely missed the deal. You look down to see an eight of hearts and a six of diamonds. Logan has a king of spades face up, and his other card face down. 

You raise your eyebrows, mulling it over in your mind. “Hit,” you finally spit out, and Logan deals you a ten of clubs. 

Oh. 

“Well shit,” you mumble. Logan chuckles as you stand up, struggling to decide what to take off. You look down at your athletic shorts and decide those are the next to go. You slip them down your legs and place them on the back of the chair with your sweatshirt. 

Logan’s throat bobs as his eyes trail up and down your legs. He isn’t laughing anymore; there’s something serious in his eyes, something dark. He works his jaw as you sit back down across from him. He looks pained as he deals the next hand. 

You cock your head to the side as he places a queen of hearts in front of you. “Are you okay?” You ask.

“’M’fine,” he answers curtly, drawing an ace of diamonds for himself. He quickly places another card down for you—a five of spades—and another face down for him. 

But you can tell there’s something wrong. It’s the way he moves, the way he fidgets in his seat. You reach out tentatively across the table, your fingers brushing against his. “Logan,” you soothe. “We don’t have to play if you don’t want to.” 

His eyes find yours, and he smiles softly, looking at your cards and then flipping his over. He got it. Twenty-one. Blackjack. “I think this game is almost over,” he says, his Adam’s apple bobbing in his throat. 

You roll your eyes and grab the hem of your tank top, slowly pulling it up your body and over your head. Now all that’s left is your sports bra and your panties. You look across the table, and there’s Logan, eyes locked on you. “One more round?” You ask. 

But he ignores you, pushing out his chair, standing up, and walking over to you. “No,” he murmurs. “I think we’re done with the game.” He pulls your chair out from the table and leans down over you, placing his hands on either armrest, caging you in. 

His eyes are dark and filled with lust, his lips just centimeters from yours. Your noses brush, his breath fanning across your cheeks. You can smell him—the pine and musk and tobacco, his shampoo, a hint of mint. 

“L-Lo,” you stutter, your heart beating out of your chest as he leans in closer. There’s something animalistic, something primal about the look in his eyes. 

“I know you want me, pretty girl,” he husks. “Could smell that pussy crying for me before you even took those little shorts off.” 

“I-I,” you stutter, unable to form a coherent thought, no less a sentence. Your thighs rub together involuntarily at Logan’s words, searching for friction, for relief. 

Logan chuckles darkly. “Yeah,” he hums, one hand dropping from the armrest and slipping in between your thighs. “That’s what I thought, princess.” 

He pushes your legs open, his fingertips trailing along your inner thigh, slowly climbing higher. He finally reaches your heat and two of his fingers drag teasingly through your clothed folds, up to your clit. “Haven’t even touched you yet and you’re already soaked,” Logan growls, stroking you through your panties. “Making a mess of the chair, hm?”

“Logan,” you whine, his fingers circling your clit and then pulling away. Before you can protest the loss of contact, he’s hoisting you up and out of the chair, his hands squeezing your ass, holding you tightly in his arms. You wrap your legs around his waist and bring your hands to the nape of his neck.

He carries you through the kitchen and into the hallway. He stops in his tracks and pushes your back against the wall, his lips finally finding yours. The kiss is rushed and frantic, like he just has to have you now, like he’s so hungry he’d die if he waited another second. He grinds his hips into yours, his erection straining through his jeans. 

“Need you, darlin’,” Logan mumbles against your lips, his chest heaving in time with yours. “Needed you this whole time.” He finally steps away from the wall and heads towards the stairs. You thread your fingers through Logan’s hair as he bites your lower lip, your pulse point, kissing you anywhere he can as he walks up the stairs and into his bedroom. 

He closes the door with a kick, and strides over to the bed in the center of the room, placing you down in the middle and crawling over you. His lips find yours again, his tongue darting out and sliding over your bottom lip, silently asking to be let inside. How could you ever say no? How could you ever not give him whatever it is he wants?

Logan balances on his forearm as his free hand trails up your body, warm and soft and soothing. He finds the hem of your bra and pulls the fabric over your tits. You arch your back, helping him slip it off the rest of the way. He finds your breasts, massaging gently before teasingly rolling your nipple under his thumb. 

“So fucking beautiful,” he huffs, moving to your other breast, pawing at the flesh, rolling over your nipple again, pinching lightly. His knee is settled between your legs, keeping you spread open for him. Your hips involuntarily rock against him, your needy core sliding up and down his thigh, searching for relief. 

Logan smiles against your lips and swallows your moans with a kiss before his touch suddenly disappears. His knee is no longer between your legs—the delicious friction gone. Your eyes flutter open and closed as he crawls down your body, kissing his way to the hem of your panties. 

“Lo,” you whimper as he places a chaste kiss to your clothed clit. “Please,” you beg, squirming underneath him. 

His arm latches around your waist, holding you down to the mattress while his other hand hooks inside the waistband of your panties. He tugs teasingly, taking his time as he slides your panties down your legs and tosses them off to the side. Logan settles himself between your thighs, his breath fanning against your cunt.

His arm is still firmly pushing you down into the mattress as he brings his face closer to where you need him most. “Wanna taste this pretty pussy, darlin’,” Logan grunts, and his tongue swipes through your folds, dragging across your slit and up to your clit. 

You curse under your breath as Logan licks another long stripe, his tongue finishing with a flick to your clit. “So fucking sweet,” Logan murmurs against you, the bass and vibration of his voice sending a burst of pleasure up your spine. “Knew you’d taste so good, pretty girl.” 

Logan pulls you closer to him, burying his face into your cunt like a man starved. He takes your clit between his lips, sucking roughly. His fingertips slide up your inner thigh, drawing higher and higher until he finds your folds. 

“Such a fucking tease,” Logan mutters, spreading your slick, prodding your entrance. “Using cards as an excuse to take your clothes off for me.” He shoves two fingers deep inside you as his tongue circles your clit. “Wanted me that bad, huh?” You can feel him smiling against you, all smug as he pulls his fingers from your slit and plunges back in. 

“Y-yes,” you stutter. His grip is like iron across your hips, keeping you in place, stopping you from squirming. “Wanted y-you so fucking bad.” 

He pumps his fingers in and out, down to the knuckles as he laps at you. He sucks at your clit again, harder this time. “I know, sweetheart,” Logan soothes, his thumb rubbing against your hip as his thrusts become faster, deeper. You’re already shaking underneath him—a trembling mess. “I’ve got you, pretty girl,” he coos. 

His tongue flicks your clit, swirling around the bud, adding more pressure with every stroke. Your walls flutter around his fingers, taking him in deeper. “Logan,” you whine, growing closer with every pump. “I-I—”

You’re cut off as he adds a third finger. “That what you needed, princess?” Logan asks, all cocky and self-assured. Your back arches off the mattress and Logan tightens his grip on your hips, holding you down as he devours you. “You’re not going anywhere until I’m finished with you.”

Your muscles clench around him at the words. His teeth graze lightly against your clit as he pulls the bud into his mouth, sucking roughly. “Lo…” You trail off, unable to use any semblance of language to communicate the way he’s making you feel. 

“Taking me so good, darlin’,” Logan praises, his fingers fucking into you unrelentingly. “Such a good fucking girl.” 

You’re so close, almost at that edge, pleasure burning through your every nerve ending. “’L-Lo I’m so—” you choke out.

“So fucked out that all you can say is my name,” Logan teases, sucking on your clit between sentences. “Wanna feel you come around my fingers.” He pushes himself in deeper. “Wanna taste it.”

“F-fuck,” you stutter, contracting around him uncontrollably. The tension building in your stomach finally snaps, the fire set free to burn through your body. “Logan!” You cry out, chanting his name like it’s a sacred prayer. And maybe it is.  

“I’ve got you,” Logan soothes, his tongue still lapping at you, his fingers still thrusting in and out. “I’m right here, let go for me.” He works you through your orgasm, his pumps slowing down as you ride out your high.

He pulls his fingers from your cunt, but his face doesn’t move. He’s still lapping at you, his tongue swiping through your folds, your slit, up to your clit. He’s drinking you in, savoring the taste of you. 

“Lo,” you whimper, running your hands through his hair, trying to guide him up your body. But he doesn’t budge. He grunts against your core, his tongue dragging through your heat. “Please,” you beg. “Need you, Lo.”

He licks one more long stripe through your folds before finally lifting his head to look up at you. Your release is painted across his lips, glistening in the moonlight. His tongue darts out, licking away the proof of your orgasm. 

“Need me, sweetheart?” He asks, sitting up, unbuckling his belt and letting it fall to the floor with a clink. He unbuttons his jeans and pulls his zipper down. “Need me to fuck you?” You nod, settling into the pillows at his headboard as he tugs his jeans and boxers down his legs. 

His cock springs free, bouncing against his stomach. You swallow nervously at the size of him. He settles on top of you, balancing on his forearm as he guides his cock to your entrance. 

Logan presses a chaste kiss to your lips as his tip nudges through your folds. “Thought about this for a long time,” he murmurs, the head of his cock bumping against your clit before sliding back down towards your entrance. His lips meet yours again, more hurried and hungry this time. “Always thinking about you.” And then he buries himself deep inside you, down to the hilt. He stalls, unmoving, giving you a moment to adjust to the size of him. He’s stretching you out, working you open. You grab his biceps, searching for purchase. Nothing could have prepared you for this, for the way he fills you up and makes you feel whole. 

“Feels so fucking good,” Logan whispers, pulling out and pushing all the way back in. “So tight, so perfect,” he praises, slowly setting a rhythmic pace, pumping in and out. 

His hand leaves the base of his cock and slips between your bodies, finding your clit—still sensitive from your first orgasm. His thumb strokes soft circles into the bud, drawing a moan from your lips. 

“Y-yes,” you pant as Logan plunges into you, faster and deeper with each thrust. You can feel him throbbing inside you, his cock dragging against your walls. It’s already too much—already more than you can handle. “F-feels so good, Lo.”

His hips snap against yours. “I know it does, pretty girl,” Logan coos, rutting into you. “Gonna take care of you. Gonna make you feel good.” His words go straight to your core, your muscles contracting around him. He curses under his breath at the feeling, your pussy taking him deeper as he sinks inside you. “Squeezing me already, sweetheart.”

He’s fucking into you, his pace growing reckless and punishing. He adds more pressure to your clit, rubbing harder, faster. You don’t know how much longer you’ll last, not with his lips at the shell of your ear whispering praises. 

“So fucking beautiful,” he husks, his hips rocking against yours. “Taking me so good, doing so well for me.” He’s hitting that sweet spot inside you with every thrust. He swallows your moans with starving, desperate, needy kisses—biting your lips, bruising them. He’s consuming you, taking everything you have to give him. 

He presses his forehead to yours, pounding into you, somehow finding a way to sink deeper inside. Your walls flutter around him, and you know you’re almost there. “Logan,” you croak, pushing your hips into his. 

“F-fuck,” he stammers, his cock twitching inside you, massaging your inner walls. “I know princess, know you’re close.” You can feel his thrusts faltering, growing sloppier. “Wanna feel you come on my cock, pretty girl.” You moan his name, wrapping your legs around his waist, keeping him close as he pumps in and out. “Come for me, darlin’.”

Logan pinches your clit and buries himself deep inside, sending you over the edge. Your orgasm crashes into you, your walls clenching around him, squeezing him tighter. “Stay,” you whisper, and he knows what you mean���knows exactly what you’re asking for.

He curses under his breath and his head falls to your shoulder as he comes undone, too, filling you up, spilling inside you. Everything is liquid heat. Your muscles contract and relax, your shoulders melting into the mattress. Everything feels hazy as Logan gently strokes your clit, thrusting in and out of you slowly, riding out your orgasms. 

He finally pulls out, wrapping his arms around your back and rolling you over so that you lay on top of his chest. He holds you close, his fingers trailing up and down your back. He kisses the crown of your head. “You okay?” He whispers into the silence of the room. 

“Yeah,” you answer, burying your face into his chest. “’M’perfect.”

He presses another kiss to the top of your head. “Wanted you for so long, princess,” he husks, his voice deep and raspy. 

“Wanted you, too, Lo,” you say, pressing a kiss to his chest. 

You can hear his heart beating; can hear every breath he takes. You can even hear the smile in his voice. “You have a terrible poker face, you know.”

You laugh softly, lifting your head from his chest. “I think it’s just fine, thank you very much.” He’s smiling down at you, his hair a mess, sweat still on his brow. He’s perfect. So fucking perfect. “And besides, you’re the one who suggested strip poker.”

He shakes his head, tugging you back down to his chest. “Should’ve played it sooner.” You can feel his chuckle reverberate through his lungs. “We can play again if you want…”“…but this time we skip the poker part.”

tags: @ilysmdovie12 @prettyseaveins @spiderset @figsnpassionfruits @silversprings-mp3 @movhoney @wittyjasontodd @theasiaabattoir @fanfic-writing-barbie @manipulatour @pedrohoe04 @derbygracie @honeyfewr

[sanakiras]

BLOOM FOR ME

PAIRING — finance major!mingyu x law major!reader

WORD COUNT — 18.1k

SYNOPSIS — even though you and mingyu share the same friends, there’s a clear distance between you. when you make a drunken mistake, he suddenly becomes increasingly aware of your lack of a relationship with him, and he takes on the challenge of changing it — not expecting to fall for the ice princess who turns out to be less cold than he thought.

TAGS — college au, slice of life, strangers to fwb to lovers, angst, fem!reader, slowburn-ish, rollercoaster of somewhat unrealistic events, minor use of the fake dating trope, not proofread, explicit sexual content, inexpressive!reader, fear of intimacy, once again a fic that seemed better in my head than the finished product but idc!

♪ — pearly drops - bloom for me,, kid cudi - kitchen,, the fugees & ms lauryn hill - killing me softly with his song

NOTE — sooo this fic is pure self-indulgence because i wrote mc as a character very similar to myself! some of these scenes are based on my own experiences :D my personality type is intj which i incorporated a lot here, do with that what you will x

you and kim mingyu just don't work.

to be honest, you don’t think you’ve ever met anyone who didn’t like him or get along with him. most people on campus either wanna be him or be with him — which makes sense, ‘cause he seems to have it all. he’s smart, talented, and awfully good-looking.

and in hindsight, you have no clue as to how or why you landed in his little clique a few months ago, which is composed of a bunch of guys who appear to have very little in common.

all you remember is how joshua, a pre-med student with a soft voice and a passion for playing guitar, introduced himself to you as you were both assigned to help out with student orientation week at the start of the new academic year, and the rest became history.

you’re not sure how he managed to wiggle his way into your personal life, or why he seems so goddamn keen to be there for that matter. the same goes for his friends — chan, seungcheol, soonyoung, minghao, seokmin and mingyu. you’re closest to joshua and seokmin, though you get along well with most of the group.

soonyoung is pursuing performing arts, and he’s loud — extremely loud. you like his sense of humor though. chan does theatre and has mentioned he wants to have his own dance studio later in life. seokmin also does theatre and is arguably the biggest ray of sunshine you’ve ever met. cheol is a business administration major, a great debater, has quite the fire in him, and he looks great in a suit. minghao is more reserved — a psychology major. very sweet and polite, likes to meditate and is surprisingly good at martial arts as well.

and then there’s mingyu.

he studies finance, though he’s considerably less obnoxious than most of the students who pursue said degree. from what you’ve gathered, he has quite the range of talents, which, in all fairness, is pretty impressive.

the guy might as well be the complete opposite of you. he’s popular, loud, outgoing, smiles a lot, known to have a real heart of gold. an entertainer.

you find yourself at the other end of the spectrum. much more on the quiet side, usually only speaking up if you deem it necessary with a sarcastic quip, more often skipping social gatherings than actually attending them.

yet in spite of your closed-off nature, the majority of people closest to you are extroverted, always trying to pull you with them in their adventures, though remaining respectful and understanding when you don’t come with — because that’s just the way you are.

perhaps that’s the sole reason why your relationship with mingyu can easily be described in a single word.

non-existent.

neither of you have anything against each other — it’s just that, out of the group, you seem to have the least of a connection with him. you certainly never do anything together or talk to one another when you’re not with the rest of the guys, and even during the moments you are, saying you’ve had a proper conversation with him would be an overstatement.

for the most part, aside from saying one-worded greetings and goodbyes, you pretty much just disregard the other’s existence.

or, well — that used to be the case.

because there’s this dirty secret the friend group doesn’t know about — and that’s that you and mingyu slept together.

it happened only a few weeks ago. it was supposed to be a simple, fun night dancing and letting loose at soonyoung’s party, which he hosted right after midterms were over. everyone got drunk, including you — way more drunk than usual, it was terrible — and the only thing you remember is waking up in a room you’d never seen before, a bed that definitely didn’t feel like the one you wake up in every morning, your clothes discarded on the floor, and his warm body next to yours.

had you been even the slightest bit sober back then, you absolutely wouldn’t have gotten into bed with him.

it’s not that you don’t find him attractive. on the contrary. he’s sex on a stick, with his strong arms, small waist, sharp jawline and beautiful tan skin — it’s no surprise he’s done several modeling jobs for some extra cash.

but despite all of that, casual hook-ups with people in your circle are not your thing. they’re not his either.

neither of you remember much of that night. you two are rarely ever alone together, so it’s practically been impossible to talk to you about it, and you’ve never been close enough with one another to even text or meet up.

after the incident, you just continued living your life like everything was the same as before. honestly, for the most part, it was.

but mingyu likes to take risks in life. that, and being open about his feelings is just who he is. so he wants to talk to you, privately.

when he finally does manage to catch you alone, which happens to be right after you’ve walked out of your criminal law class, you’re not exactly welcoming to him.

“what are you doing at the other side of campus?” is all you greet him with.

“i’m good, thank you for asking.” he jokes in an attempt to make things more light-hearted, but you don’t pull a single muscle, face remaining the exact same, so he swallows and clutches the strap of his shoulder bag a little tighter. “i, uh... i felt like we should talk about what happened the other night. soonyoung’s party.”

“what’s there to talk about?”

“what we did. together.”

“we fucked. so what?”

oh. that’s a much more blunt response than he expected, even if he is used to those kind of remarks from you.

“well—” he cuts himself off, really cursing himself for not properly thinking of what to say to you before showing up outside of your lecture hall all of a sudden, “don’t you think it’s something we gotta discuss?”

“you want a professional analysis about how much i enjoyed it or something?” you ask with a furrowed brow. “not that i’d be able to give you one, considering it was all just a blur.”

“yeah, i can’t exactly remember much of it either. look, i... i don’t usually hook up with people i’m friends with—”

“except we’re not friends. i don’t think you’ve ever said as much to me as you have in this conversation.”

even though it’s true, it does feel like a slap across the face for a reason he can’t pinpoint. he’s aware you can be blunt sometimes, but this is more than people usually get out of you.

“fine. we’re just acquaintances. but we do share the same friends.” he says after a moment of awkward silence, his tone sounding a little colder than before, subconsciously trying to compensate for your unwelcoming attitude. “doesn’t that matter to you?”

sucking at the inside of your cheek, you sigh. “did your roommate notice me?”

his roommate being jeon wonwoo, the cute computer science major who likes to spend his free time working out and playing video games, always walking around campus with headphones stuck in his ears and a pair of glasses up on his nose. he and mingyu are both on the football team, you’re pretty sure.

“no. he didn’t see a thing. not as far as i know, anyway.”

“good. so that means we can both just pretend it never happened, yeah?” the smile you put on your face is so painfully fake that it makes him clench his jaw.

“yeah.” he mumbles bitterly, and you move away from him, going down the stairs, and mingyu rests his head against the wall, huffing in annoyance and embarrassment.

to be completely honest, he’s not sure why the whole ordeal bothers him so much. what you said was all true, even if you could’ve worded it differently.

many, many questions pop up in his mind. do you have something against him? do you not like him? if that’s the case, why? has he ever said something that caused you to get a bad impression of him? what do his friends have that he doesn’t, aside from considerably shorter legs?

he’s not sure what it is about you he finds so weirdly intriguing, but whatever it is, he’s discovered a fresh determination in him to find out.

mingyu is unsure of how to handle the situation with you. every time you look at him, all he sees is utter disinterest, though there’s very little he can make out of your facial expressions in the first place.

he finds himself seated at a table in the library with minghao, seungcheol and chan, pondering over the exam he’s got coming up at the end of the week, said thoughts coming to a halt once he spots you at the other side of the hall.

his gaze involuntarily follows you as you appear to be scanning a few bookshelves.

if he’s being honest, he’d already noticed you before the drunk-sex incident. he always thought you were pretty, and based on your your vocabulary and the way you spoke, he figured you were intelligent as well, so he silently admired you from afar.

and now, those feelings have only increased.

his eyes linger on your figure. it’s such a fucking shame he doesn’t remember his hands on your skin, the touch of your lips — he could actually cry just imagining it.

then he feels he’s getting too far in the sexual innuendos in his head, so he tells himself to stop right the hell now before his excitement starts to show in his pants.

god, he’s never like this. why is it irking him so much?

it’s chan — the youngest of the group — who grabs your attention, beckoning for you to come over to the table.

when you move to sit down on the empty chair between him and seungcheol, they begin to talk about how the shitty assignments they’re working on are so not worth their time, how one of cheol’s professors didn’t bother showing up for his lecture yesterday morning, and minghao mentions something about a new group project of his—

—and the whole fucking time, you feel mingyu’s gaze burning on you.

it both confuses and intrigues you. what the hell does he want now?

then when two of the boys get into a discussion, you stare right back at him, almost as if to tell him you’re aware of him watching you and you’re watching him as well, and a very thick yet silent tension rises between you.

he swears he catches the smallest glimpse of amusement in your features before you get up and tell them you’ve got to go to your lecture.

cheol raises his thick brow at his friend. “you’re uncharacteristically quiet.”

mingyu shrugs as he watches you walk out of the hall. “yeah, sorry. been a little preoccupied.”

“i can tell, ‘cause aren’t you supposed to be starting football practice right now?”

that snaps him out of it. he checks the silver watch sitting on his wrist, cursing to himself before grabbing his things and hastily throwing them into his bag before sprinting to his dorm.

the following day, as he’s working on his assignment, he decides to take out his phone, typing your username into the search bar on instagram.

your social media profile is as mysterious as you are. zero posts, some pretty aesthetic pictures found in your highlights as well as one or two with you on it, though blurry or with your face partially hidden.

it’s usually much easier for him to get close to people, yet with this, with you — it feels like the way is blocked, and he doesn’t know where to start.

tapping his finger on the table, he tells himself to make some kind of conversation with you the next time he sees you.

which is several days later, when the friend group is meeting up at a restaurant for dinner and drinks.

by the time he arrives — later than planned due to a study session running behind — everyone is already seated, including you. he’d hoped to secure a spot next to you for once, but you’re seated between joshua and seungcheol instead. the only vacant spot is at the other side of the table.

well, shit.

the worst thing is that you don’t seem to spare him a single glance. every time he looks your way, you’re either zoned out or intently listening to the boys around you as they tell their stories, with you throwing in a sarcastic little quip every now and then, making them laugh.

what he doesn’t notice is that you do look at him — he’d be surprised by the amount of times your eyes wander back to him, subtly observing him from a distance when he rambles about something his professor did during class or what went down during football practice.

he’s so handsome that it almost gets annoying to look at him.

it’s an hour before midnight when you decide to get going — you have an unnecessarily early class tomorrow and still gotta get back to your dorm. so you grab your coat and bag, announcing you’re leaving, after which they say they don’t like the idea of you going back on your own, but you refute it and tell them you’ll be fine like always.

“i can take you. i just remembered i gotta catch up with some things anyways before class tomorrow.”

mingyu’s sudden statement makes you blink at him a few times.

it’s not that he’s never offered to take you home before, ever the gentleman, but the situation always ends up with you either going home on your own with them keeping an eye on your location or one of the other guys taking you back, so his sudden eagerness to escort you to your dorm catches you by surprise.

it’s mainly joshua and minghao who catch onto your slight change in demeanor, but their puzzled looks are gone as soon as they came. they’ve had quite a few drinks, after all, and you’re pretty sure soonyoung is so drunk he’s on the verge of tears at the other side of the table, distracting them.

both you and mingyu say your goodbyes to the rest of the group before exiting the restaurant, embracing the fresh air outside.

it’s early october, your favorite time of year. you’re fond of the cloudy skies, the temperature right between warm and cold, and the leaves changing colors.

mingyu walks next to you on the sidewalk, his hands shoved into the pockets of his dark denim jacket.

“i’m sorry for being rude the other day,” you speak up, breaking the silence, “i have a habit of being too straightforward for my own good.”

oh.

he didn’t expect this from you, but it’s a pleasant surprise, even if you’re not looking him in the eye at all.

so he shrugs. “it’s okay. looking back, i didn’t really know where i wanted the conversation to go, anyways.”

“i assumed you were just gonna ask me to keep it between us.”

“i didn’t even think about that, to be honest. i just don’t do stuff like that with friends, so... i guess i was just curious about your thoughts or something.”

you bare your teeth in a bitter smile, still refraining from looking in his direction when he’s clearly looking at your face. “you called me your friend again.”

the comment doesn’t sit right with him. “do you mind me asking why that bothers you?”

“it bothers me ‘cause it’s not the truth.”

god, you certainly do not sugarcoat things.

“do you... is there anything i did to make you dislike me?”

mingyu watches the way you clench your jaw at his question. it intrigues him. “i never said i disliked you, mingyu. i’m just picky about who i consider close to me and i don’t want anyone to get the wrong impression. sharing friends doesn’t make us friends.”

“not even a little bit?”

you chuckle again. he wonders what he’d have to do to elicit a real, genuine laugh from you. “name one of my hobbies. something i like to do in my spare time. the basics don’t count.”

he eagerly starts his sentence. “well, you like to... y’know... hang out with us.”

“i said no basics.”

“okay. fine. you got me. but, to be fair, you also gotta admit you don’t exactly share much.”

“you know who i do share things with? my friends.” you tease him, after which he laughs. you like the sound of his laugh.

“you’re evil.”

“thank you.”

he turns around, walking backwards in front of you so he can face you, finally getting the eye contact he’s been waiting to get. “i wanna be friends.”

“congratulations.”

“oh, c’mon. work with me here.”

“i would if it wasn’t so much fun to see you acting like this.”

mingyu feels a certain excitement rushing through his body when he sees how you look at him. “let’s get to know each other better. how about twenty questions?”

“oh, you mean like a conversation?”

he chooses to ignore your sarcasm for now. “i’ll go first. what’s a hobby of yours?”

“such depth,” you snicker, “i like to ice skate.”

“really? that’s cool.” he smiles, tilting his head. “okay. you gotta ask me a question now.”

“which of your friends is closest to you?”

yeah, he should’ve seen something like that coming. of course you wouldn’t go for small talk.

he ponders over the question before giving his answer. “minghao.”

“hm. interesting.” you just hum, clearly having no intention of explaining it, so you gesture for him to come up with another question.

“do you think you’ll ever be close with me?”

“no.”

“why?”

“not your turn.” you tell him, simultaneously trying to find out how far you can take this. “how many girls have you slept with?”

“four. why do you think we won’t ever be close friends?”

“because we’re too different. you can’t stand the fact that i give nothing away, i can sense it a mile from here.”

“it’s not that.”

“what is it then?”

“i’m… i don’t know, a people person. i want to get along with everyone, want everyone i like to like me. maybe that’s selfish, but… yeah. i like you and i wanna be your friend. it bothers me that you don’t.” he feels the words suddenly tumbling out of his mouth are taking the conversation elsewhere, so he tries his best to not come across as too intense. “i’m sorry for pestering you about it, i’ll just... walk you to your dorm and leave you be.”

he wants to increase the distance between you, but you don’t let him. your hand moves to his upper arm, touching him, but it’s gone before he can even look at it.

physical touch has never been one of your strong points, despite craving it at the same time. “i’m gonna say it one more time and that’s it — i don’t dislike you. maybe… i don’t know, maybe we could have a strong friendship, who knows. if you wanna prove me wrong, be my guest. i won’t stop you.”

“okay. anything i should know?”

you pout your lips as you think of things to mention. “i’m not a huge fan of texting. i prefer calling or meeting up in person. i’m more of a listener than a talker. i’m also a bit of a control freak so i’m not big on surprises. that’s all you’re getting for now.”

he thinks over your words and smiles. “i can work with that.”

not much later, you arrive at the university campus, and you use your card to enter your building, walking out front.

mingyu clearly feels it’s mandatory to follow you all the way to your door.

once you’ve arrived at your dorm, you lean against the doorpost. “thanks for taking me home.”

“you’re welcome. see you tomorrow.” he says. normally he’d give his friends something like a hug when saying goodbye like this, but he has a gut feeling you’re not very fond of physical contact with people who aren’t close to you, so he lets that go for now.

“bye.” the playful smile is audible in your voice before you close your door, and mingyu leaves your building with a sickeningly nice feeling in his stomach.

and he remains on your mind, especially once you watch him walk towards his own dorm from behind the window, unaware of your gaze.

it makes you scoff to yourself. you’ll give it to him — he’s sparked your interest.

“hey. mingyu.”

he’s roughly pulled from observing you in his secure spot in the university library by jeonghan, his partner for a project he’s working on. “what?”

“what’s going on? you’re awfully distracted.”

“it’s—nothing.” he responds, voice an octave higher. maybe he should quit this habit of looking at you every time he comes here.

“has anyone ever told you you’re a shitty liar?”

“many times, actually.”

“good. ‘cause you are.”

jeonghan is shorter than he is, with more of a lanky physique and slightly longer hair. he’s also the most annoying little shit mingyu knows — despite the guy being older than him — because he somehow. knows. everything. all the time. he knows things about mingyu before he knows them himself. if anything, it’s a talent.

“so who’s the girl?” jeonghan then asks in a more hushed tone, using his pencil to point at the girl in question.

mingyu looks in your direction again, taking notice of how nice you look today, and he just gives in to his friend, not even bothering to try and act stupid. “friend of a friend.”

“what does she do?”

“law.”

“she nice?”

“to a specific group of people, yeah.”

“oh, she’s a little mean to you, huh?”

“not mean. just distant. very distant.”

“that’s new.”

“what is?”

“you going for girls like that. it’s refreshing.”

“yeah, well—she doesn’t go for guys like me.”

“what do you mean?”

“i’m pretty sure she doesn’t like me at all. she’s wildly unimpressed by my presence, anyway.”

“how do you know?”

mingyu sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. “she’s very close with joshua and seokmin, likes the rest of the guys too, but me… i don’t know. we’ve been in the same friend group for a year, and it’s like i’m the only one she doesn’t feel comfortable with. bothers me.”

“you’ve known her for a whole year and it’s only bothering you now?” jeonghan senses there’s more going on. “what led up to this? got into an argument?”

the younger of the two scoffs. “not at all. the contrary, actually.”

jeonghan jokingly throws in the first thing he can think of. “what, did you accidentally kiss her when you were drunk or something?”

“not entirely. we were both drunk, for starters.” mingyu comments, the next sentence muttered much more quietly. “and we had sex.”

a scoff of surprise leaves jeonghan’s mouth. “you slept together? when?”

“soonyoung’s party.”

“that was weeks ago. haven’t you talked about it? at all?” he asks, clearly invested in the story now.

“i brought it up, she brushed it off and said it meant nothing. told her i wanted to be friends with her a couple days later, but she said she doesn’t think we’ll ever be good friends ‘cause we’re too different, and it’s fucking killing me for some reason. she still said she was… open to friendship though.”

“ah, you like her.”

“yeah, obviously. problem is that she hates me.”

“no, i mean, you like her. you don’t just want to be her friend.”

mingyu is somewhat taken aback by his words. “i don’t have a crush.”

“don’t fool yourself. you’d never get this worked up over someone not wanting to be friends with you — you’re worked up because you wanna get to know her better and she doesn’t seem like she wants to get to know you at all.”

“i can’t be in love with someone i hardly know.”

“debatable. you still have a crush on her.”

“fine. whatever. say that were the case — purely hypothetical of course — what should i do to get her attention?”

jeonghan has that knowing smile on his face, the one that makes him look like he’s up to no good. “you gotta get a little selfish.”

“could you be a little less vague for once in your life?”

“create a circumstance where she spends time with you without it being planned.” he shrugs, as if that answers it. “something like getting stuck in an elevator for a few hours. you know what i mean.”

“well, unless you were planning on hijacking the elevator somehow, i don’t think i have all that many options.”

right there and then, the two recognize another student from their statistics class sitting a few tables further. she’s giggling to her friends about something, hesitantly looking their way, pointing at them.

“speaking of crushes, she’s got one on you.” jeonghan mentions, raising his brow.

it doesn’t interest mingyu all that much. “yeah, she asked me out a while back. i told her i was busy. didn’t have the heart to flat-out reject her. in hindsight, maybe i should’ve, ‘cause she acts like that every time i see her around.”

jeonghan can’t help but take advantage of the opportunity currently presenting itself like a fucking birthday cake. “are you thinking what i’m thinking?”

“probably not, since i have no idea what you’re getting at.”

he leans a bit closer to his taller friend, speaking in a more hushed tone this time. “you could reject her — subtly.”

mingyu frowns at that. “how?”

and jeonghan smirks a little to himself before he’s about to tell him his plan. “you’ve heard of fake dating before, right?”

the following day, you find yourself in the library of the law faculty, reviewing the slides of the lecture you didn’t feel like attending this morning.

someone drops their bag ever-so-subtly on the table at the empty spot next to you, and when you look up from your notes, you recognize your dearest acquaintance.

you huff, removing one of your earbuds to engage in the conversation you didn’t ask for. “what do you want?”

“you have got to stop saying that when you see me.”

“no, i like it this way.”

“of course you do.” mingyu merely scoffs at your words, sitting down next to you. “you look busy.”

“gee. it’s almost as if i am busy.”

“what’re you working on?”

“undoubtedly nothing you have any knowledge of.”

he rolls his eyes when you grin at him, clearly ready to dodge his questions with more of your sarcastic comments.

“are you always this much on edge?”

“mhm. i hope you are too — otherwise you’re taking up too much space.”

the comment has him frowning at first, and then he gets it, making him let out a vaguely impressed scoff. “you’re cute.”

“not exactly the word i would use.”

“really?” he says, taking the cap off his water bottle, “i think it suits you.”

you squint your eyes at him, finally taking the bait. “what do you want? seriously.”

he shifts in his seat, clearly happy you’re finally going along with him here. “you know the senior gala on thursday, right?”

“yeah. i’m not attending.”

“okay. here’s the thing — i kind of have this girl in one of my classes who won’t stop bothering me about going out on a date with her and stuff.”

“gosh, poor you.”

“i’m serious. it sucks.”

“what does this have to do with you bothering me?”

“well, i figured if she finally saw me with someone else, she’d back off.” he explains, leaning a bit closer to you. “meaning i need a plus-one who’s willing to play my girlfriend for the night.”

“so?”

“so, i’d like you to be my plus-one.” he grins.

“why?”

“why not?”

“you’re saying you wanna pretend to be dating?” you ask, and when he nods, you shake your head. “no one’s gonna believe that.”

“yeah, they will. it’s perfect. same friend group, completely different majors so she probably doesn’t know you — c’mon, consider it.”

he’s surprisingly convincing, as if he already knows how to crack your demeanor. you remain stubborn, though. “out of all the girls you’ve got in your contacts, you’re asking me?”

“you’ve made it clear we’re only acquaintances — i wanna change that. become friends. just like i told you.”

you finally lock eyes with him again, taking your pen away from the paper, refusing to back down once you notice how close he is. “i don’t know what you’re expecting, but you’d get nothing out of a friendship with me.”

he keeps his eyes on yours. “i’ll be the judge of that.”

when you roll your eyes at him, he can tell you’re considering it. “when does it start?”

“ten.”

“dress code?”

“go for a cocktail dress.”

twisting your lips, you push your tongue against the inside of your cheek, and even you are a little weak for those big, brown eyes of his. and you said you’d give him a chance, after all. “fine.”

“great!” he nearly jumps in excitement. “text me when you’re ready and i’ll come and pick you up.”

“yeah, yeah. now go. i got shit to do.”

and once you’ve watched him cheerfully skip out of your sight, the tiniest smile rises to your face, after which you chuckle to yourself.

mere days later, on thursday, mingyu finds himself at your doorstep. it’s not like him to feel nervous — so why the hell is he this time?

you open the door hastily. “hey. you can come on in, i’m all ready except for the pair of earrings i can’t seem to find.”

he watches as you search through small drawers in the cupboard by the wall. maybe he should be glad you’ve got your back faced to him, because he’s subconsciously staring at you, checking you out.

the velvet red one-shoulder dress hugs your features just right, and he’s stunned in his place before you notice he still hasn’t closed the door behind him. “mingyu. the door.”

“uh—yeah. sorry.” he stumbles, stepping inside, doing as he’s told before his eyes wander around your room. “don’t you have a roommate?”

“i used to have one, in my first year. got a single room after.”

“must get quiet after a while.”

“i like it that way.”

your words remind you of his roommate, wonwoo. he figures you’re someone who prefers solitude after a day of being around others, which he keeps in mind.

once you’ve found your earrings, you’re putting them in, and you notice him stepping closer to you. he actually looks criminally good in the black suit he’s wearing, his half-long hair sitting just right. the fucker might as well be a real-life prince charming.

you’re glad you went with smokey eyes. your look compliments his.

as you subtly watch him in the mirror, he comes to stand behind you, holding out the modest bouquet of red roses he’s been holding behind his back. “these are for you. i appreciate that you wanted to come with me tonight.”

the gesture makes your eyes soften. “thank you. oh, they smell nice.”

mingyu feels a little giddy inside when you give him a little smile before putting the flowers in a vase with water. it might be the first time he’s seen you give one that is genuine.

the gala is taking place at a fancy hotel close to university. the walk there only takes a few minutes. once you're nearing the entrance to the party, dimly lit chandeliers catching your eye, he gently puts his hand on your back, just underneath your shoulder blades. you raise a brow, looking over at him, and he shrugs. “i’m your fake boyfriend for the night, remember?”

which has you chortling for a second. “that’s not where to put your hands if you wanna make this believable.”

before he can change the position of his hand, you’re already doing it for him, pushing his hand lower with yours, watching the way his face drops when you allow him to go lower than your hips, breath hitching in his throat.

“that’s better. you can hold me and kiss me on the cheek if you have to. not too much, it’s not the right time and place for it anyways.”

“noted.”

once you’ve arrived inside and given your coats away, you notice most people here are strangers to you, anxiety kicking in, internally wishing you’d consumed some alcohol before coming.

and your companion takes notice of this from the way you’re suddenly squeezing his hand, which you’re undoubtedly not doing on purpose.

“you okay?”

“sure, i’m fine.” you faintly smile back at him.

he’s honestly considering saying fuck it, ready to ask you to just get out of here with him and go anywhere else instead — that is until one of your friends comes up to you.

“am i imagining things—”

“we’re fake dating, josh.” you answer him, increasing the distance between you and mingyu as if to emphasize your point. “his idea, not mine.”

joshua appears all kinds of confused. “okay. um… just—why?”

mingyu presses his lips together. what he said about the girl bothering him was all true. could he handle it on his own? probably. is fake dating slightly unnecessary and a little dramatic of a solution? undoubtedly.

but he just wanted you as his plus-one so bad. he saw it as an opportunity he couldn’t miss out on.

what can he say? jeonghan is weirdly persuasive.

“there’s this classmate of mine who won’t get off my back about dating, so i figured she’d quit if i showed up with a girlfriend. girlfriend being her.”

in spite of the explanation, joshua still looks at the two of you with a frown. “right.”

“i’m gonna go get us a drink. be right back.” mingyu says, almost regretting doing so when he realizes he has to take his hand off your back.

you watch him walk off to the bar, suddenly hearing your best friend chuckle softly next to you. “can’t believe i never considered you two before.”

“what are you talking about?”

“you and him. you’d be a nice match.”

“what, me and mingyu? we’d be a disaster.”

“why?”

“we’re too different, josh. and don’t even try to give me that opposites attract crap.”

his soft facial features melt into a smile that gives off the impression he knows something you don’t. “i think you’d be surprised. that’s all.”

whatever the fuck that means.

your fake boyfriend returns not much later with a drink for the two of you. despite your clear disagreement with joshua’s words, you just can’t help but think about what he said, especially when mingyu’s arm remains looped around your waist for quite a while as the three of you discuss the whereabouts of your friends.

the worst thing is that you don’t even mind him touching you. you’ve always been picky when it comes to the people who are allowed to as much as stand close to you, and mingyu was not one of those people until you grabbed his wrist after he took you home from dinner, which was only last week.

and that’s not the only thing you’re becoming increasingly aware of.

mingyu’s popularity is a bigger thing than you thought. either that, or half the people here are from his faculty. which is highly unlikely.

being as observant as you are, you’ve noticed several girls as well as guys pointing your way, making you feel uneasy.

so your hold on him tightens as you stare back at them, as if to silently tell them to fuck off and focus on someone other than your fake boyfriend.

you’re not actually jealous. no, that’d be ridiculous. you can’t be jealous of others wanting something you don’t even have in the first place.

chan and seokmin arrive half an hour later, having pretty much the same reaction to the situation as shua. but they play along.

though not without noticing how comfortable the two of you are together.

after several hours of drinking, dancing and socializing, you feel in need of a break. “hey, i’m just gonna get some fresh air outside, okay?”

mingyu’s lashes flutter as he nods. “would you mind if i came with?”

you gesture that you’re okay with it, so he takes your hand to guide you through the mass of people without losing you, the littlest of touches sparking an indescribable feeling in your stomach.

the air feels much colder now that you’ve been inside the warm hotel for several hours. you sigh, leaning back against the brick wall behind you, the surface feeling slightly uncomfortable on your one uncovered shoulderblade.

mingyu takes fake dating very seriously, as it seems. he’s practically been unable to keep his hands off you, and you’re going to indulge in it for however long it lasts.

as you’re standing outside together, you notice he’s loosened up more around you, not hesitant to get close either. he’s certainly not afraid to put his hand on your thigh, and you make zero effort to push him away.

his lips ghost by the skin of your neck, alcohol clouding his thoughts. “it’s nice to have you here. i wasn’t all that excited about going at first.”

“yeah, yeah. i made your night ten times better.”

he snickers. “you hear that often?”

“every now and then. don’t sound so surprised.”

“it doesn’t surprise me. i was just hoping i was special compared to the others.”

“doesn’t everyone?”

“you’re a little cryptic, anyone ever told you that?”

“maybe.” you respond, chuckling, allowing his lips to touch your bare skin.

mingyu bites his lower lip, not afraid to look you in the eye to match your playful gaze with a similar one. “do you not remember a single thing from the night of soonyoung’s party?”

he almost smacks himself for asking the question, seeing your expression falter a little. “no. neither do you, as you’ve told me.”

“no, i don’t,” he says firmly, mentally trying to slap himself for consuming so much alcohol that it makes him say things he usually wouldn’t, “but i kinda wish i did.”

“why?”

when he remains quiet, still trying to figure out the best way to respond, you gently take a hold of his chin to lift it up, making sure he keeps his eyes on yours. playing with him is fun.

“i...” he tries to utter the words, but god, he might as well be hypnotized.

before he can give his answer, seokmin loudly stumbles out of the building, catching your attention. he’s clearly had a bit too much to drink, his boisterous laughter echoing through the courtyard. seungcheol follows closely behind, a hand on his shoulder.

whatever moment you and mingyu were having is gone in an instant. cheol spots you, keeping his friend somewhat upright in the process.

“i’m gonna go take him home, couldn’t find the other guys. i think soonyoung might be next, though.” he says, doing his best to keep seokmin upright in the process.

so mingyu nods. “okay. i’ll go check.”

they say their goodbyes, after which he proceeds to looks at you again. you let your head rest against the wall again. “you go ahead. i’ll meet you back inside in a few.”

he silently agrees, returning to the people inside. you appreciate the silence, mentally drowning out the sound of people talking and cars driving into the background.

it’s then that some girl you’ve never seen before walks up to you. “hey. you’re mingyu’s new girlfriend, right?”

the crease between your brows becomes apparent. “have we met?”

“no, no. i’m in the same faculty as him. i was just curious. didn’t know he was dating anyone.”

she’s clearly had a bit to drink, though not enough for her speech to be incoherent. you’re not sure what to give her other than an awkward smile that looks anything but genuine.

but either she’s too far gone to catch the hint or she simply doesn’t want to. “was kinda surprised to see him end up with a girl like you.”

and since she’s probably not gonna remember this conversation tomorrow, you decide to engage in it for once. “what’s that supposed to mean?”

“i don’t know, ‘s just... you seem a little distant. just different. he’s never really gone for someone like you. no offense or anything.”

you keep your composure despite a certain emotion brewing hot inside you, whatever the hell it may be. the sheer audacity of some people to stick their nose in business that’s not their own. “gee. hard to fathom i landed a guy like that, huh?”

the sarcasm dripping from your tongue finally seems to get it through to her that her opinion is anything but wanted, so she mumbles something about going back inside, after which you lean back against the wall, closing your eyes for a moment.

worst thing is that she’s probably right.

you and mingyu just don’t work.

and you don’t even have feelings for the guy, so why does it bother you?

the whole thing upsets you enough for you to go back inside, rushing to find him to tell him that you don’t feel like staying.

when you return to him, he’s so used to his role that his hand finds your waist and his lips touch your cheek, but you smoothly back away this time. “i’m gonna go back to my dorm. you guys have fun.”

even over the noisy music and chatter in the background, he notices the change in your tone and behavior, which gives him the hint that something has upset you. “why? is everything okay?”

“i’m fine.”

“i’ll take you back.”

“i’d appreciate it if you didn’t.” you tell him, sounding harsher than intended. again. god, you keep messing up. you sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose for a moment. “i’m sorry.”

mingyu is still processing your words as you’re leaving him behind.

then when you’re walking towards the exit, a girl accidentally bumps into you, spilling her drink over your dress.

goddamn. you wonder what the fuck you did to the universe for it to give you a night as shitty as this.

she begins to profusely apologize, very obviously sincere, but you just curtly tell her it’s fine, annoyance rising.

mingyu notices the situation from afar, deciding to go after you when he sees you walk to the bathroom instead of the exit.

the bathroom is awfully fancy, but it seems only fair for a hotel like this. clenching your jaw, you grumble while getting some paper towels, hiking the dress just a bit upwards.

god, you’re never agreeing to do that fake dating shit ever again. what a joke.

you huff as you keep trying to get the now barely visible stain out of your dress. you’re rubbing over the fabric on your thigh when someone walks in.

of course it’s him.

“any luck getting it out?” he asks, and you clench your jaw, throwing the wet paper towels into the trashcan beside the sink. your hands hold onto the cold surface, knuckles growing white as you focus on them instead of him.

“why am i here?”

“what do you mean?”

you turn your gaze to him, abandoning your quest of getting the stain out of your dress, annoyed that he’s acting like he doesn’t know what you’re talking about. “why did you invite me here? out of everyone you could’ve gone with, why did you wanna go with me?”

“are you angry at me?”

“answer the question.”

“i just…” he trails off, trying to think of the right words. “i just figured it was a way to become friends.”

you’re actually going to lose your shit if he as much as utters the word ‘friend’ to you one more time. “oh, jesus. cut the bullshit. why do you wanna be friends with me so badly?”

“i don’t know, because… because it occurred to me — y’know, after the party, after what we did — that we have little to no relationship and i wanted to change that.”

“oh, right. you just had to sleep with me before thinking of that.”

“no, i didn’t. i just haven’t been able to stop thinking about you since that night, and i—”

what the hell is he even supposed to say? he’s not even sure what exactly it is he wants from you. sure, he wants to be friends — but god, he spends so much time wishing he remembered what it was like to touch you that night, what you looked like underneath your pretty little dress, what you sounded like.

you’re quiet for a second before your whole demeanor changes, agitation shifting to intrigue. “so that’s what this is about.”

“well—what?”

“if you wanted to fuck, you should’ve just said that. instead of dragging me to this shit.”

“i—” he suddenly feels suffocated by the small size of the room and your body getting closer to his, backing him up against the door. “that’s not why i—”

“does it matter?” you ask, and he tries to hide his ragged breathing now that you’ve pressed your front against him, clenching his jaw.

it doesn’t help that you’re watching him like a hawk.

“not to repeat myself all the time, but i—i normally don’t do this with friends. i don’t want you to have the wrong idea of me.” he exclaims, cursing himself for looking down at the way your red dress is accentuating your curves so well.

so you begin to unbutton his shirt, and he breathes heavily because of it. “well, i guess you’re in luck. ‘cause we’re not friends.”

he’s about to tell you that he genuinely wants to be when you finally kiss him. it’s fast and intense and hungry.

whatever he expected, it wasn’t this — but he can’t find it in him to not give in.

his hand moves to the back of your head, pulling you closer, then proceeding to help you with unbuttoning his shirt, all without breaking the kiss.

mingyu shivers when your cold hands finally touch his bare chest, the faintest hint of your sharp nails nearly making him beg for you to dig them into his skin until he bleeds.

there’s a shift in control when his feet no longer feel locked in with the tiled floor, his hands trailing up your legs, fingers gripping the skin of your thighs. he lifts you up, allowing you to wrap your legs around his waist, only to have him pushing you up against the door, pressing his body against yours.

you’re rubbing your front against him, taking notice of the hard bulge in his pants, nearly crying out from his sheer size.

holy shit. no wonder you were sore after you slept with him — he’s fucking huge.

“gyu,” you break the kiss, “can i suck you off?”

the way you breathily call him by his nickname for the first time is nearly enough for him to bust in his pants. “wanna taste you instead. please?”

with your back resting against the surface behind you, you watch him as he sinks to his knees, kissing the inside of your legs, goosebumps erupting on your skin.

“are you sure?”

“yeah. please let me.”

“okay. just make it quick.”

in hindsight, maybe that wasn’t the best thing to say.

because he’s diving in faster than you can comprehend, lace panties pulled down in less than a second, making you gasp in surprise. your fingers grab onto a few strands of his hair, accidentally tugging on them, only to have him moaning in response, which is most likely the best thing you’ve ever heard.

your teeth sink into your lower lip as a way to suppress your moans, only deeps hums and groans escaping you, much to mingyu’s annoyance, because he wants to hear you.

his fingers slide into your dripping wetness, your muscles tightening up from the sudden intrusion. he looks up at you while kissing the inside of your leg, a sight that’s so fucking hot that you have to tell yourself not to get lost in it.

another surge of adrenaline rushes through you when he spreads your legs even wider, causing you to let out a broken moan, much to his satisfaction.

“you can pull on my hair. i like that.” he breathes out with a genuine smile and lust-blown eyes, refusing to wait for your reaction and getting right back to what he was doing.

it doesn’t take him long before he’s got you squirming above him. tugging his hair really does get him going, but you’re nearly at your limit, feeling the familiar feeling building up in your lower belly.

“gyu—fuck, ‘s too much, too much—” you try to push his wrist away and make him look up at you again.

you swear you might lose it when you see he’s actually pouting over the fact that you’re pulling him away from something he clearly enjoys doing.

“but, baby, i wanna make you cum.”

the pet name turns you on even more. “you can. i just want you inside of me, right now.”

he’s rising to his feet, towering over you with his tall frame as you push him back against the door, kissing his jaw, neck and collarbone while undoing the buttons of his white shirt.

mingyu is surprisingly vocal, which you thoroughly enjoy. his lips find yours again, relishing in the remaining taste of you on his tongue.

“god—want me to fuck you?”

pulling your dress over your head, you’re left in your matching set of lingerie that you just so conveniently put on tonight. “are you seriously asking me that right now?”

“fine. bend over the sink, then.”

the difference in his tone and words makes you shiver with excitement. once you do as he says, a new shot of adrenaline courses through your body — because you completely forgot about the mirror that’s now right in front of you.

so you’re able to watch him push his pants down, positioning himself behind you. his big hands are warm on your skin, the silver ring on his finger making you shiver.

his shirt is half unbuttoned, his hair a mess, trousers down to his ankles — but none of that matters now that he’s got you bent over in front of him, fingers trembling in excitement as he takes the condom from his pocket to slip it on.

all he can do is hiss and groan when he feels your heat wrap around him so nicely as he pushes into you. “you’re so tight, jesus—”

you huff. “not my fault you’re so big.”

it makes him laugh and simultaneously turns him on. “you’re all bite, even when i’m trying to fuck you.”

“don’t act like you don’t like it.”

he then finally bottoms out, both of you moaning, and he chuckles. “never said i didn’t.”

god, he’s so fucking attractive. he bites his lower lip as he throws his head back, his strokes slow but hard.

his girth feels so good inside you — and his touches are electric on your skin. his hands go from your ass to your hips, your stomach, everywhere.

and he’s certainly not afraid to get loud. especially when he feels you’re pushing your hips back against his. he’s convinced this is what heaven feels like.

“gyu, a little harder, please.” you plead, slightly beginning to struggle with holding yourself up by the edge of the sink.

“how hard d’you want it?”

“as hard as you want. i can take it.”

he gestures for you to turn over, lifting you up and pushing you up against the wall, burying himself inside you again before you can even comprehend it.

his fingers feel almost painful on your thighs with the way he’s digging into your skin. he’s sucking and biting right above your collarbone, leaving some pretty marks that will definitely be visible tomorrow.

you push his jaw upward so you can kiss him, and he sighs into it, tilting his head to get better access.

it’s like he’s trying to match his thrusts with your heartbeat at this point. pressure builds in your stomach when you whine his name. “oh my god—gyu—”

“i love it when you call me that,” he breathes out, so into it that he’s confessing everything on his mind, “you don’t know how much i’ve thought about this — been fantasizing about this for ages.”

you hold onto his shoulder blades, nails digging into them. “then you better make it worth my while.”

“such a brat.” he teases, a moan slipping out right after when you use your legs wrapped around his waist to push him deeper into you.

mingyu’s stamina is admirable — but he’s a simple man. you’re so hot and you just feel so good around him, and he knows he’s getting close to his release already.

you notice his pace becoming slightly uneven, his breaths erratic, a layer of cold sweat forming on his back.

he’s doing his best to hold out for you, to make you hit your peak first, but you actually need to see him come undone first.

“are you gonna cum, gyu?”

you have to refrain from biting your lip when he’s stuttering out a response. “n—no, not yet—”

“i want you to.”

“jesus, don’t say that—”

oh, he’s cute. he’s responding so well to your words, so you indulge in it a little bit more.

“wanna fuck me again later? without a condom? you can cum inside me. i’ll let you do anything you want.” you tease — your words being the complete truth, because if he’d want to fuck you again, you’d sure as shit let him.

his brows scrunch upwards while he lets out another whine. “anything?”

“mhm,” you nod, “anything.”

his fantasies about you, the way you’re looking at him, the things you’re saying, the way you suddenly clench around him — it’s all too much. his release spills into the condom, his muscles flexing from the sudden rush of adrenaline shooting through him.

it’s enough to make your legs tremble, and you reach the climax you’ve been aching for.

he’s still coming down from his high, face buried in the crook of your neck when he hears you chuckle. “so much for being friends, huh?”

he then smiles as well. “are we close enough for you to consider me as your friend now?”

“you’re quite literally inside me.”

“knowing you, that doesn’t really have to change anything.”

“oh, is that so?” you retort at his cheekiness. “sure. you’ve made it to friend level 1. congrats.”

“great. level 2 is next, then.”

“god, forget i said anything.”

“no going back now. you’re stuck with me.”

something’s very clearly changed between you since that night. mingyu has, in a certain way, changed your relationship.

because you’ve successfully upgraded from strangers to fuck buddies.

and truth be told, he wants to rip his fucking hair out.

the sex is great. there’s something thrilling and exciting about your secret relationship, both of you skipping lectures and sneaking away after classes with no one around you having a single clue.

and yet he’s come to the conclusion that this isn’t what he wants.

he wants you. all of you, completely. but every time he tries to get even remotely close to you, you somehow manage to dodge it and change the topic.

it bothers him. but he’s scared to just put all his feelings on a platter — because he doesn’t want to lose whatever he has with you.

something he’s also discovered is how utterly weak he is for even the slightest bit of your attention, the smallest of touches.

so when he’s typing away at his laptop in the study hall, noticing the screen of his phone light up as a message from you comes in, he can’t bring himself to ignore it.

20:23: you look cute when you’re focused

the message makes him frown, and he looks around, trying to figure out where you are, since you’ve clearly got your eyes on him.

so he texts back.

20:24: i always look cute ;)

tapping his fingers on the table, he waits for your response. the three buttons that indicate you’re typing suddenly go away, and he pouts, only to then be greeted by your voice close to his ear. “bit of an exaggeration, don’t you think?”

“fuckin’—” it almost makes him jump and screech out of shock. “christ, don’t sneak up on me like that.”

you chuckle at his high-pitched reaction. “bad conscience?”

“no. you’re just scary.”

“thank you.” you grin with pride, moving to sit on the table, right beside his laptop. “you busy?”

“just going over some older lecture notes to prep for an exam.”

“wanna come over to my dorm?”

“fourth time this week. what’s gotten into you? well, aside from me, obviously.”

“hilarious. really.” you remark, watching him laugh at his own joke, unable to help the smile rising to your cheeks. “what can i say? it’s a great stress reliever.”

“i know. give me a sec and i’ll pack my things.”

as he closes up his laptop and textbooks, you look around the other tables — which are mostly empty, except for the one by the window, which is where you notice a girl shooting you a bit of a weird look once you make eye contact with her.

“mingyu.”

“hm?”

“the chick by the window with the shitty earrings. you know her?”

he subtly looks into the direction of said window, recognizing the girl from his advanced statistics class. “yeah, i have a class with her. can’t really remember her name though. why?”

“she likes you.”

“oh.” he just shrugs, continuing to zip up his bag, standing up from his seat. “i didn’t notice.”

“sure.” you chuckle sarcastically.

that makes him raise a brow. he feigns shock, causing you to look at him.

“what?”

“you’re jealous.”

“excuse me?” you monotonously ask, brows furrowing in disdain.

“it’s actually kinda hot.”

“oh, please. i have nothing to be jealous of.”

“and yet you are.”

“either you shut your ass up or i’ll find someone else to relieve my stress, kim.”

he laughs and you roll your eyes. then he slings his bag over his shoulder, his hands in his pockets as he follows you out of the study hall.

as soon as you’ve entered your dorm room, he’s got you pressed against the wall, nipping at your skin. he makes you feel sickeningly good, putting your former boyfriends to shame — you’re certainly not complaining.

once he’s done with you and you’re completely worn out, you lay with your head on his chest, his fingers softly stroking your naked back.

you seem more on edge than usual today. less playful. tired, even. his voice sounds hesitant when he speaks up. “is everything okay? you look stressed.”

“i’m fine.”

he figures you either don’t want to open up or you simply don’t feel comfortable doing so with him, so he chooses not to pry, opting to let you know he’s there for you. “okay. well, if you need anything, someone to talk to, you can always come to me.”

you frown a little. refusing to act impulsively, you swallow your words, not saying a thing.

mingyu takes your silence as his cue to leave you be. a feeling of unease creeps into his body, and the room suddenly feels smaller than before.

so he gently moves away from you, sitting up to put his clothes back on. “i should probably go. wonwoo will be pissed off if i don’t have the kitchen cleaned up once he gets back.”

he’s buttoning his jeans when you speak up behind him, admitting your reasons for feeling more stressed than usual. “i’ve got two exams next week. they’re extremely important, i have to pass them, i just… i can’t focus for some reason.”

when he turns around, you’re not facing him. he leans against the tabletop, looking at you. “anything in particular that’s bothering you?”

“i don’t know. it’s just…” you shrug your shoulders a little, unsure of how to explain it, “i guess i haven’t been feeling great in my own skin lately, even though i don’t actually have a reason for it.”

“maybe i can help you study. could work as a nice motivator.”

“gyu—” you chuckle a little to reject him politely, but he sees it coming at this point, persisting.

“why don’t we just try it? if you don’t feel like doing it again, then, fine. we can always just restrict our activities to solely physical stuff again.”

“do you even have the time to help me?”

he’s smiling, able to tell you’re thinking about it. “are you kidding? i can do anything.”

“always so humble.”

“yeah, that’s why you like me so much.” he laughs. “that’s why i’m your friend.”

“whatever makes you sleep at night.”

mingyu wasn’t kidding when he said he wanted to help you, nor when he mentioned he wanted you two to be closer.

he’s putting in effort to make you like him, that’s for sure. buying you coffees and snacks, offering to study with you whenever you mention difficult topics you have to cram for exams — he’s certainly establishing his presence in your daily life.

and you hate how easily you get used to it.

for whatever reason, you haven’t had sex since that day either. you’re pretty sure he wants to prove that he likes you for you and not just your body.

which is sweet. but you also have needs, and they’re worse now, knowing he can fulfill them extremely well, as he’s proved many times at this point.

so you text him to ask if he wants to come over later.

as he’s seated at a picnic table on the campus square, he notices your text, grabbing his phone to respond to you.

“your girlfriend texting you again?”

mingyu looks up at joshua, who’s sitting across from him with a pen in hand. he shakes his head. “not my girlfriend.”

“she might as well be.”

“she doesn’t like me enough to be.”

shua wouldn’t call himself nosy, but he’s determined to get a better idea of what exactly is going on between you. “what’s up with you and her?”

“it’s complicated.” his friend responds, eyes narrowing from the rays of sunlight. “i’m not even sure, honestly.”

joshua has this ability to pry people’s hearts open and let their feelings pour out without breaking a sweat — how easily he does it should be studied.

“are you friends with benefits or something? situationship?”

ironically, those words are the complete opposite of what you and him are. mingyu huffs out of frustration, voicing his thoughts. “she doesn’t like it when i call her my friend, she appears to have an exceedingly low daily quota of emotions, i’m busting my ass off to get my own assignments done and spend as much time with her as i can and i’m pretty sure she doesn’t even like me. at all. worst part being that i like her, shua. i like her.”

“have you told her you like her?”

“sort of. in a friendly way. she just glared at me.”

joshua finds mingyu’s inner torment a little amusing, but he feels for him. “maybe she’ll warm up to you. give it a while, she’s a tough nut to crack.”

“is she open with you?”

“sort of. i don’t think there’s a single soul out there she’s completely open with.” he sucks on the inside of his cheek for a second. “she has mentioned in the past that she’s actually very sensitive but just doesn’t, like, really express it. and you gotta keep in mind that people show love and affection differently. give it time.”

mingyu takes a breath as he thinks over the words.

give it time.

which he does. he notices you’re gradually getting closer to him over the course of time, still not showing too much — but it feels different. you choose to sit with him more often than not when you meet up with the other guys, you’re spending a lot of time with him, and you’re showing initiative to make time for him. every time he lands in your bed, it feels more intimate than ever.

you’re starting to make him feel like he matters to you. his crush on you is getting out of hand to the point he needs to stop himself from gazing at you every time you look him in the eye.

just like right now. you’re smiling at him over something he can’t remember — it’s a genuine smile, he cherishes those every time you flash him one as they’re rare — and you just look so pretty.

a text message from one of the guys on the football team pulls him out of it. which sparks an idea in him.

“hey, i have a football game coming up this saturday. do you wanna come? you could finally see me in action.” he asks. when he notices the puzzled look on your face, he tilts his head. “oh, come on. friendship works both ways, you know that, right? team effort and all that jazz.”

his wording makes you chuckle. “fine. i’ll be there.”

“you won’t regret it. our team is great.”

“really? then you better prove it. can’t be cheering for the losing team.”

with a raised brow, he points at you. “wanna bet?”

“what do you have in mind?”

he considers his options for a moment. “if my team wins, i get to choose what we do in bed next time. as long as you’re into it too, obviously. if the opposite team wins, you get to choose.”

now that’s an offer you’re certainly not gonna reject. taking on the challenge, you nod. “alright. deal.”

he shakes your hand ever so professionally, gathering his books since he needs to get to class. “oh, and, just so you know — my team’s won regional championships for the past two years in a row. i’m just saying.”

you tilt your head. he winks at you before walking away from the table, and you smile to yourself.

damn that asshole for making you like him this much.

saturday arrives, and you find yourself walking by the green football fields, surprised by the amount of people who showed up.

mingyu mentioned he was heading here earlier so you just told him you’d be there, sitting with the crowd.

it seems like it’s going to be a cold-weather match today. it’s already dark out, and the rain just started coming down from the sky. you’re glad the bleachers come with shade canopies so at least you won’t be soaked by the time the game is over.

your eyes are fixed on mingyu’s back as he stands by the sidelines with the rest of his team, enthusiastically discussing what’s most likely gonna be their strategy for the game.

then he turns around, still very engaged in the conversation, the wet strands of his hair framing his facial features. gosh, he’s incredibly handsome.

before running out onto the field, he looks back at the bleachers, scanning the masses before his eyes lock with yours.

he ever so dramatically makes a little heart with his fingers, teasingly motioning it towards you, and you put your middle finger up, making him laugh.

mingyu’s a real sweetheart, you have to admit. he’s growing on you.

watching the game is more fun than you anticipated. despite not being into football all that much, it’s great to watch the boys work together as well as they do.

you’re certainly not complaining when mingyu throws his vest on the bench halfway through the match, leaving him in a black compression shirt, emphasizing his strong figure.

shit. maybe you should watch him play more often.

it’s his team that seems to be on the winning side tonight — until the opposing team scores ten minutes before the end. both teams have the same score now, which is bad. ending with a draw would suck.

you’re now completely sucked into the game like the rest of the audience, desperate for mingyu’s team to score another goal.

the universe must be on their side today, because they do. three minutes left on the clock and none other than jeon wonwoo himself is able to kick the ball into the net, escaping the hands of the keeper.

it’s all yells of happiness on the field.

the referee blows his whistle to call the end of the game. everyone at your side of the bleachers stands up from their seats, yourself included, to cheer and clap for the boys, happy that they won the game.

you watch them congratulate eachother, some of their friends walking onto the field to do the same.

following the masses, you also leave your seat in the bleachers, walking down the stairs.

mingyu notices you coming his way and runs over to you, surprising you by lifting you up, giving you arguably the best hug you’ve ever had in your whole damn life. he holds onto you so tightly, his big arms and tall frame caging you in — in the best way possible.

when he gently puts you back down, his one hand briefly finds your cheek, which catches you off guard, but you don’t shy away from it.

he’s so tempted to just say fuck it and kiss you right now. you look so pretty, and your eyes — your eyes. he could stare into them forever and love every second of it.

but there’s too much at stake to get impulsive. “thanks for coming.���

“you’re welcome.” you blankly respond, making him smile a little.

“how did i do? good enough for your standards?”

you shrug at him, taking a brief look at his teammates celebrating in the distance behind him. “i was mostly focused on wonwoo, actually, but you were doing a good job too.”

he rolls his eyes before making a sarcastic comment. “you’re hilarious.”

“something i’m very aware of.”

he fake smiles at you, and you reciprocate the gesture, patting him on the shoulder.

“wanna go catch a drink with me?”

“don’t you wanna celebrate with the rest of the team?”

“not tonight.” he shakes his head. “i just gotta go get my bag. come with me?”

he intertwines his fingers with yours and you hardly notice it. which is bizarre if you consider how you had no relationship with him to begin with several months ago. “okay, yeah.”

you head to the men’s locker room with him, which is dark and empty. all the other guys are still out on the field, as you noticed when you were walking over here.

“the lights haven’t been working since yesterday, so watch your step.” mingyu tells you. the rays of moonlight coming through the high windows are enough to at least light up the room enough for you to see where you’re going.

you suddenly get an idea. “do you think the guys are gonna be out there for long?”

“they usually do. ten minutes, give or take.” he answers absentmindedly while taking his black duffel bag out of the locker with his name on it.

once he turns around, you push him back against the locker, taking him by the surprise, your finger pulling at the elastic waistband of his pants and boxers.

“i give credit where it’s due, you know.”

oh. oh. he only then understands what you’re getting at.

you always manage to make him a little nervous somehow — he lives for it. “in public? here? we could go back to your—oh, shit—”

you make him stutter the moment your hand moves underneath his clothes to take a hold of his dick. “but you’re already hard, gyu.”

christ. you’ve got some nerve, putting up that soft and sweet voice as if you’re not fucking responsible for getting him hard in the first place.

he doesn’t protest when you sink to your knees in front of him, pulling his boxers down his thick thighs, his cock springing free.

you grin a little to yourself before taking him in your mouth. he’s so hot like this, all hard and panting and begging.

“h—holy shit, that feels good.” he gasps, the warm sensation of your mouth making him go dizzy.

his hand moves to the back of your head. you take him as much as you can, using your hands for the part you can’t take. he slowly becomes a mess, his head resting against the locker.

you look up at him when he’s shamelessly moaning at the feeling of your tongue swirling around him, his hands subconsciously pushing your head just a little bit forward, making you take just that little bit more of his cock.

arousal begins to pool between your legs, and you suddenly curse yourself for choosing to wear jeans instead of a skirt tonight.

“fuck, fuck, baby—”

you release him with a pop, a mix of spit and his arousal coating your lips. “wanna taste everything. can’t make a mess here.”

it’s such a shame he’s still wearing his clothes. his stomach caves in so nicely whenever you’re sucking him off — like he can’t catch his breath. it’s the best thing you’ve ever seen.

his legs are trembling, and he’s embarrasingly close to his release already. “you don’t—ah—have to do this here if you don’t want to—”

“‘m not leaving ‘til you cum down my throat, gyu. you can do that, though, right?”

he nods, his adam’s apple bobbing as he swallows, his voice all soft and submissive. he can’t help it. “yeah, yeah, i’ll do whatever you want, baby.”

“good boy.” you tell him, entirely unaware of the effect it has on him.

the moment you hollow your cheeks, it’s over for him. the salty taste of his release sits in your mouth before you swallow it, and his chest heaves while he pulls himself together.

both your eyes widen when you suddenly hear the voices outside getting closer, and mingyu knows it’s time to get the fuck out of here. he quickly pulls his pants back up, his bag in his one hand and your hand in the other as he drags you with him to take the back exit before anyone can notice either of you.

you both take a breather outside as you lean against the wall of the building before you burst into laughter together. he feels on top of fucking cloud nine, if he’s being truthful.

“you’re insane.” he laughs, looking to the side to find you laughing and blushing at the same time. “you’re blushing? after doing that? wow. who are you and what have you done with my friend?”

“you’re getting special treatment, you know. i don’t suck off my other friends.” you tease, shrugging your shoulders.

maybe he should consider pursuing a theatre career with the way he dramatically puts his hand over his heart. “does this mean i made it to friend level 2?”

“you did. now you’ve been downgraded back to level 1, though. what’re you gonna do about it?”

he plays along with you. “well, shit. can’t have that. we can go get a burger with fries at that place near campus. my treat?”

“sounds good.” the words have left your mouth and that big smile is right on his face again. you playfully push his shoulder, cheeks hurting from the smile on yours.

he’s getting closer to you than you anticipated, and that’s not a good thing, but for now, you tell yourself it’ll be fine. how much closer could he possibly get?

another month passes by when, for the first time in a while, mingyu doesn’t drop by your dorm. he doesn’t text, doesn’t call — and you find yourself worried about him.

it’s been nothing but complete radio silence from his end, which isn’t a good sign.

you’ve already left him several voicemails when chan lets you know he’s been having a terrible fever for the past two days. it leaves you with the urge to go and check up on him, so once you’ve had all your classes for the day, you find yourself knocking on his door.

it takes a moment for him to answer it, wonwoo seemingly not present in the dorm.

when mingyu opens the door, surprise is painted across his face, the heavy bags under his eyes making him seem awfully tired. shit, you hope you didn’t wake him. he’s wearing a plain white shirt with thin black pyjama pants, his hair an utter mess.

the surprise on his face is gone once you open your mouth. “you look like shit.”

he snorts at your words. “would you say that to me if i were on my deathbed, too?”

“absolutely.”

he smiles at your attitude, finding it strangely refreshing. “wanna come in? i promise i’ll stay at a distance so you won’t get it.”

you didn’t think he was going to invite you in, but you accept the offer nonetheless. “i was wondering why you didn’t call. then chan told me you were sick.”

he shuts the door behind you. “yeah, i’ve been sleeping, mostly. watched some netflix too but it quickly gives headaches. i’m sorry for not letting you know — didn’t think you were worried.”

you pause for a moment. “well. you thought wrong. friends worry, don’t they?”

the words make him smile. he didn’t think you cared all that much about him for some reason — this changes that. “fair. what’s in the bowl?”

he’s referring to the black bowl covered in foil you have clutched between your arms. you shrug. “soup. i don’t know if you already had some, but it worked wonders for me when i was sick a while back, so… yeah. i figured you could use it.”

his face lights up when he realizes you went out your way to make this for him. with gratitude, he accepts the bowl. “thank you, i appreciate it. looks really good. you can sit by my desk if you want to, by the way.”

as he’s walking across the room, you notice the mishap in his steps, like he’s about to lose his balance. “are you okay?”

“yeah, ‘s just—i’m a little dizzy.”

your hands find his shoulders — a touch that feels heavy compared to the usual skin-to-skin contact you share with him — to put him down on his bed. “don’t force it. if you’re about to faint, you might as well be lying down.”

his lids hang low, eyes nearly closed when you pull the covers over his body. you touch his cheeks and forehead with the back of your hand to get an indication of his temperature.

as soon as you’re about to tell him he probably has a light fever, it seems he’s already half asleep. you pull the covers up to his chest to ensure he’s comfortable.

you gaze at him for a moment as he snores softly, biting your lip as you curse yourself for giving him a treatment he doesn’t deserve.

maybe mingyu likes to think he doesn’t wear his heart on his sleeve, but that’s far from the truth. even you have noticed he’s been looking at you a certain way recently, and that’s saying something.

one look at him and you’re already feeling like a big softie. it’s ridiculous.

you’re scared of what you feel for him, but as long as you can keep your relationship like this, it’ll be fine.

now that he’s asleep, you wander around his room. you know wonwoo must be at football practice, since mingyu is normally there with him at this time of the week.

you usually take him to your dorm, so you’re not in his all that often. your eyes rake across the framed pictures of his friends, family, loved ones, memories he’s made.

they stop, though, when recognizing yourself in one of the pictures. he promised you he’d frame one up as a way of ‘solidifying your friendship’ as he so politely put it.

still, you didn’t think he’d actually do it.

smiling to yourself, you proceed to notice his laptop screen is still on. he must’ve been working on something when you knocked on his door.

out of curiosity, you check the screen, figuring he was working on the essay he’s been postponing for two weeks because he had difficulty getting started.

you take a look at the assignment and decide you’re gonna try to do it for him. luckily, the necessary paragraphs that ought to be studied beforehand and referenced in the essay itself came with the mail, so that makes everything a lot easier.

when mingyu wakes up hours later, he finds himself alone in his room. you’re gone, though he notices the glass of water on his nightstand has been refilled, his laptop is flipped open, and there’s a sticky note attached to it.

slowly, he rubs his eyes and moves toward the desk to grab the laptop before sitting back against the pillows.

you must’ve written something on the note, he figures.

‘hopefully the essay is up to the standards of your class. i did it in a separate document so you can just get rid of the whole thing if it’s not what you want it to be. let me know if you need anything else. x’

he frowns, turning the device on to see what you worked on — and the screen lights up, only for him to realize you wrote the essay due for tomorrow. and with a few of his own additions here and there, it’s good enough to submit, which is impressive for someone who’s not actually taking the class.

and right now, all he can do is smile at his screen like an idiot.

you’re at the university skating rink when you hear someone calling your name from the bleachers.

looking up with a frown, you suddenly notice a tall man sprinting your way, so you skate towards him. “mingyu, what the hell are you doing here?”

“i got 87/100 for the essay. for the one class i always hate. you’re a genius.” he exclaims, absolutely beaming at you.

you suddenly remember doing the essay for him, snorting at his reaction. “so i’ve heard. good to see you’re doing better.”

“is there anything i can do in return?”

“don’t worry. i like writing essays. besides, you already helped me out plenty of times. it was the least i could do.”

the words coming out of your mouth hardly match your facial expression, but he finds he’s gotten used to it now. he understands you better than ever before. “you know how you said i’d get nothing out of a friendship with you?” he recalls, biting his lip for a moment, “you were wrong.”

a mere chuckle escapes you. “right. you get top-notch essays and bowls of chicken soup.”

your comment was sarcastic, but he remains serious. “you’re wonderful, you know that?”

it’s not often people use a word like that to describe you. it feels weird hearing it, but your attitude remains the same. “am i?”

“yeah, you are,” he nods, pushing out more compliments, “and i’m glad to have you in my life.”

the playful expression on your face falters — like a glitch occurring in your system. mingyu is starting to break through your hard exterior remarkably easily, and that’s beginning to scare you a little.

he leaves without saying another word, but the look on his face is enough to tell that he’s feeling the tension too. whatever relationship you have is becoming more intimate by day, most definitely passing the friendship it was supposed to be, and to you, that is very alarming.

and you suddenly refuse to let it go any further.

whenever he texts you, you either tell him you don’t have the time to come over or nothing at all. you avoid him like the plague, ensure not to go to social gatherings if he’s going be there and stay well away from all the places you and him studied together. it hurts, because you do miss him, yet you manage to keep it up.

but you can only do so much. unfortunately, mingyu is smarter than you hoped.

after two weeks of you avoiding him, he decides he’s had enough.

when you’re almost about to leave the dorm for your lecture, you hear someone knocking on your door. you open it to find him standing there, and he walks right by you, not bothering to ask whether he can come in.

“why have you been avoiding me?”

“i gotta leave for my lecture, i don’t have time for this.”

“so make the time.” he says sternly, jaw clenched. “answer the question.”

“i haven’t been avoiding you.”

“sure. so it’s a coincidence you suddenly stopped talking to me?”

you huff in frustration and close the door, leaning with your back against it. “no, it isn’t.”

he raises his hands in defeat. “so, why?”

“it’s been fun. i don’t know. but you’ve proved what you wanted to prove, so… good for you. we can both move on now.” you shrug, hardly sounding convinced of your own words.

“you’re lying.” he breathes out, scoffing to himself. he’s baffled that you think he’d consider it believable at all. “four months ago, i would’ve bought that. but not now.”

“believe what you wanna believe. i don’t really care.” you give him the cold shoulder, attempting to open the door so you can leave, but he immediately shuts it to stop you from doing so.

“don’t bullshit me. you care. i don’t know why the fuck you’re so hellbent on not admitting that, but it’s the truth.”

he’s beginning to get on your nerves. “what fucking answers are you even here for? since you claim to know everything that’s going on inside my head already.”

it’s then that he starts to show how genuinely upset he is at you pushing him away. “what makes me so different from the other guys? joshua, seokmin, chan—all of them. why is it so easy for you to be close with them but not with me?”

“because you keep trying to get closer to me! from day one, you’ve been saying you wanna be friends with me like the rest of them, but your actions don’t line up with that.”

“so what? i like you and i’m pretty damn sure you like me too.” his voice is softer, face closer to yours, those brown eyes of his working their way straight to your heart. “what are you so afraid of?”

either you’re imagining things or he’s leaning in to kiss you. his lips are so close before you feel them on yours, a sensation you missed like nothing else.

your fingers touch the back of his neck. it’s hard not to get lost in the feeling of his mouth on yours, the smell of his cologne making it even harder.

kissing mingyu is the closest you’ll ever get to heaven, but right now, all it’s making you feel is guilt and shame.

so you pull yourself away from him, breaking the kiss, hands feeling heavy on his chest. “close the door on your way out.” you whisper, leaving him alone in your dorm.

he stands perplexed in his place for a moment, pinching the bridge of his nose, processing what just happened.

“fuck.”

it’s been a week, and he hasn’t called nor texted you since that conversation. you assume that he’s decided to move on.

which is understandable. if you were him, you’d be done with it too.

it feels strange to be going about your day without him dropping by or talking to you. like he left a void you’re unable to fill. and it hurts — you miss him.

you’re having lunch with seokmin and minghao in the cafeteria when he’s suddenly standing in front of you by the table. “i just got a call from the gallery manager — we’ve got it to ourselves this friday evening!”

minghao smiles widely, the sweet sound of his excited laughter intriguing the rest of you. he turns his head to explain. “me and mingyu have been trying to rent the gallery so we could finally be able to put our work on display. apparently, it was just confirmed we managed to pull it off.”

hao is a passionate painter — mingyu a photographer. their love for art is one of the things that binds them together, and they’ve mentioned wanting to have their own exhibit for a few months now. despite the things that have happened, you’re happy for them.

“that’s great! we can come, right?” seokmin asks, already grabbing his phone to put it in his agenda.

“yeah, you guys better.” minghao answers, his gaze shifting to you. “you have to come too. you’re free, right?”

he’s aware of things between you and mingyu being tense right now — though he doesn’t know why — but he still thinks it’d be good for you and him to see each other.

your eyes meet mingyu’s for the first time since your last conversation a week ago, and hao follows your actions, looking at him as well.

mingyu subtly looks away, hoping his friend didn't catch him staring at you. before he can utter the words he wants to say, you tilt your head, already speaking up. “sure. i'll be there.”

he unintentionally gives you a puzzled look, and you pop a piece of gum in your mouth, looking at your wrist as if there’s a watch there.

there isn’t. “won’t you look at the time. i’ll see you guys later.”

they briefly say bye to you, very much used to the way you dismiss yourself, and mingyu watches the interaction as if it’s the first time witnessing it — as if he hasn’t known you to be like this for several months.

he watches you walk out of the cafeteria, confronted by his two friends staring at him. “what?”

“you’re deep in it.” minghao remarks. “when are you guys finally gonna admit that you wanna be together?”

“it’s not that easy.”

seokmin frowns, connecting the dots before gasping. “wait. you and her are a thing? since when? why didn’t anyone tell me this?”

the other two just deadpan a stare at him.

on friday night, you attend the art exhibit. you know he’s been working hard on the collection, and you certainly figured you were gonna be confronted with mingyu as well, but this is one gathering you couldn’t afford to miss. so you choose to try and forget the drama for one night.

you’re wearing a little black dress with lacy tights and sleek ankle boots, an outfit you feel nice in.

the gallery is buzzing with friends of the artists as well as people who frequent the place whenever a new exhibit is up. perhaps some pieces will be sold tonight.

as you’re passing some of mingyu’s framed photos, you hear his familiar voice behind you.

“i was surprised when you agreed to come.”

when you turn your head, he’s standing there with his hands in the pockets of his fitted black pants, the deep cut of his white blouse exposing just a bit more of his upper chest than usual, a silver chain sitting all pretty on his neck and collarbones.

personally, you find it’s relatively rare to find men with good taste in fashion, but he’s definitely got it. he looks good. really good.

biting your lip, you give him nothing but a cool response. “came to see if you were any good.”

“and? what’s your judgement?”

“haven’t made up my mind yet.” your tone turns into a more teasing one, seeing as he appears considerably less hostile than you. “does my judgement really matter that much, though?”

he nods so quickly, almost as if he were hypnotized by you. “more than you know.”

him showing you affection actually makes your heart shatter. he’s so genuine in it too — and you just don’t know what to do with all that love he so easily gives you.

people pass you left and right, completely unaware of the heavy feeling currently bubbling inside your chest. you’re crumbling under his gaze and he fucking feels it.

and this situation is precisely the one thing you were so afraid of. you know he knows how to poke into your heart, he knows when you’re lying to him, he knows when you’re upset or hurt — and the idea that there’s someone out there who can see all of that just by looking at you utterly terrifies you.

in moments like these, your expression doesn’t gradually change. it falls hard and quick, sometimes very visibly, just like right now. the blank stare is gone, your lips parting, eyes blinking erratically — it’s like you received a slap to the face.

“your photography is beautiful, mingyu. you’re talented, but you didn’t need me to tell you that.” your voice breaks in the middle of your sentence and you leave him behind, heading into the ladies’ room, hoping he won’t follow you.

you exhale when he doesn’t.

knowing it’s way too early to leave, you pull yourself together, and once you get out of the bathroom, you make it your mission to avoid him for the rest of the night. if that means talking to god knows how many new people, so be it.

minghao’s paintings are beautiful. you’re in awe of his talent as you walk past his artworks, admiring each of them.

as the evening nears its end, the artist himself comes up to you with that gentle smile he often wears. “so, what do you think? do i have potential?”

“are you kidding? you’ve got more than just potential. these are gorgeous. you should be proud of them.”

he thanks you, his hands sitting in the pockets of his trousers. “what’d you do to mingyu?”

you cross your arms over your chest. “why’re you assuming i did something?”

“because he’s been looking like a kicked puppy for the past few weeks. and i heard you and him suddenly stopped hanging out, so...”

taking a deep breath, you shake your head to yourself. “honestly, i’m not even sure what happened between us. it came out of nowhere.”

minghao keeps his eyes on you even when you look away. “he came out of nowhere and you started liking him.”

the comment makes your eyes widen, but you don’t bother hiding the truth from him. he might be the most trustworthy guy you know. “yeah. so i pushed him away.”

he’s aware of your fear of letting people in beyond a certain extent. “what did he do?”

you could cry, honestly. your face is blank — your voice trembles. “he said he was happy to have me in his life. god, i’m so fucking insecure.”

hao softly rubs over your shoulder blade for a second, a gesture you appreciate. he shrugs. “you’re not obligated to do something you don’t wanna do. but talking about it is better than leaving it unsaid. gyu’s a good guy. he’ll understand it, but only if you give him the chance to.”

with that sentiment, he leaves you be, and you rub your arms, staring at the painting that’s currently in front of you, only to realize it’s about two lovers.

there’s a thin line between laughing and crying. you feel like you’re somewhere in the middle right now.

“christ, i need a fucking drink.” you mutter to yourself, running a hand through your hair.

“mind if i join you?”

of course. why are you even surprised?

without looking him in the eye, you respond to his question with one of your own. “sure you want my company?”

“beats going drinking alone.” mingyu shrugs next to you.

you let out a sarcastic chuckle at that. “whatever you say.”

luckily for you, the nearest bar is around the block. the walk there is quiet. you’re not sure what to say to him, and you feel him subtly looking your way.

he holds the door open for you to go in first. the place is not all that crowded yet, only a few tables occupied, probably because it’s still relatively early in the evening.

since no one else is seated by the bar top, you choose to head to one of the high stools there, ordering two shots of vodka before even sitting down.

the bartender puts two shot glasses in front of you and pours the liquid in both until they’re completely filled. mingyu looks at you as he picks up the small glass, and you just lightly tilt your head as a toast.

his facial expression is as bitter as the alcohol burning in his throat. he hates the way you look at him — like you don’t give a fuck about him.

you look down at your glass. you still haven’t exchanged a single word since leaving the gallery. what the hell are you even supposed to say? you didn’t want to be here with him in the first place.

liar. the little voice in your head creeps in.

the silence feels as painful as trailing your nails down a chalkboard. surprisingly, it’s you who ends up speaking first.

“if you’re trying to make the situation more awkward, you’re succeeding.”

“i’m just trying to find the words. don’t know where to start.”

your voice is hostile and sharp as a blade. “then don’t.”

of course you’re aware you’re being mean. but it’s to serve a purpose. every time you show this side of you, people always leave. better sooner than later, right?

mingyu, instead of feeling insulted by your attitude, looks at you as if he’s deciphering a puzzle. “i will. because i care.”

that makes you remain quiet. you just scoff instead, not knowing what to say next. he shifts in his seat to be able to look at him better — you do the exact opposite, turning your face away from him.

“can i ask you something?”

you don’t actually respond, save for the blank stare you give him. which he takes as a yes.

“you not showing much… is it a front you put up or something you just do?”

an interesting question — one you actually have to think about. “the latter. having a resting bitch face doesn’t really help my case, i guess. but i also enjoy keeping people in the dark a bit. can’t have everyone showing everything.”

“why not?”

blinking at him for a moment, you gently smile at him. it’s not a genuine one. “do you wanna know why you feel at a disadvantage right now?”

“because your alcohol tolerance is better than mine?”

“because you can’t tell what i’m thinking.”

he then puts his chin up to look at you better. you tilt your head a little, as if you were following his gaze, and he feels like he’s on the right track here.

“maybe i kinda like that disadvantage.” he suggests, but you shake your head knowingly.

“no, you don’t.”

“how would you know?”

you suck at the inside of your cheek for a moment, taking a breath. “my mom once said to me that it bothered her she couldn’t tell what i was thinking.” you pout your lips as if you’re thinking about it. “i told her i liked that. being an open book is my worst nightmare.”

“why?”

“putting your thoughts and feelings on display make you vulnerable. being vulnerable makes you weak.”

“so you think it’s better to isolate your feelings completely — discuss them with no one? ever?”

“unless it’s necessary, yes. besides, feelings aren’t black and white. do you know how difficult it is to convey them through words, let alone getting the person at the other end of the line to actually understand them?”

mingyu looks—no, gazes at you. “how will you know if you don’t try?”

“how do you know i haven’t? you think you’re the first person who’s tried to get close to me like this?” you ask, tilting your head. “speaking of which, i’ve been having a real hard time trying to figure out what it is you want from me. i’m not buying the whole ‘i-just-wanna-be-friends’ façade. never did. i thought it was the sex, but i initiated it more often than you did.”

“it wasn’t for the sex.” he shrugs his shoulders. “i like you.”

“so you’ve mentioned. since when?”

“since… always.”

“we never even talked before soonyoung’s party.”

“no, but i liked you.”

“bullshit.” you fire back at him, scoffing sarcastically. “i’m hardly likeable — nothing i’m insecure about. just a plain fact.”

“and yet i like you a lot. must be shocking.” he jests, the vaguest hint of a rising smirk on his face. “do you like me?”

“i can’t stand you,” you reach out to push his chin upwards so he looks up at you, only realizing how physically comfortable you’ve become with him after doing so, “but at least you’ve got a pretty face to make up for it.”

it’s unbelievable, mingyu thinks to himself. the way you keep teasing him, keep being a little mean to him, and he just eats it all up.

every moment he spends with you has him wondering what on earth it is about you that draws him in so much.

but, fuck, he just can’t get enough.

another shot is poured into your glasses, which you take between your thumb and index finger, nodding at him so he’ll take his.

the liquid burns in his throat, making him feel hot, and you get awfully turned on when you notice the way he wipes off the drops that accidentally ran down his chin.

“i think i’ve got you all figured out.”

his bold statement and matching attitude has you raising your shoulders. “oh yeah? go on. try me, i’m curious.”

the words tumble from his lips as if they’re part of a monologue he’s been rehearsing for weeks. “you feel so much, express so little. i bet it must be hard to keep up with your own mind sometimes. i think you often feel judged and misunderstood because of your attitude, but you don’t mind that much, since you prefer a smaller circle anyways. you simply don’t like wearing your heart on your sleeve, but it’d be a big mistake to think you don’t have one — and honestly, i’d do anything to be close to it.”

it’s not often you’re speechless.

he describes you almost perfectly, and your body language subconsciously changes, confident and playful demeanor gone — the cold and distant side of your personality coming out again.

“good job,” you tell him softly, moving to grab a few bucks from your wallet to pay for the drinks, “i guess i should say congratulations. you know what makes me tick. that means we’re done here, right?”

he finally spots the shift in your behavior. “wait—”

“have a good night, gyu.”

you curse yourself for accidentally using the nickname as you walk out of the bar, putting your coat on, feeling raindrops on your hair and skin once you get outside.

as you’re trying to make yourself remember where the nearest metro stop is, you hear him utter your name behind you. “what did i do? was it something i said?”

letting impulsivity get to you for once, you scoff, muttering a response. “it was everything you said.”

“why?” he asks, the tension running thicker. “why won’t you just let me in, for once? just this time?”

you hate how desperate he sounds — you hate how much it’s tugging at your heartstrings.

“why do you even want me to?”

“‘cause i like you.”

“no, you don’t. you just like whatever chase this is, just a little fun to keep things interesting for you.”

“has it ever crossed your mind that maybe i like you for you?”

“i’ve given you no reason to like me.”

“what, you think that no one out there will like you unless you act differently?”

his words feel like a growing tear in your heart. your self-esteem is so ridiculously low that it makes you believe no one would love you if you were to be unapologetically yourself — and hearing someone say it out loud hurts.

mingyu watches as the emotion flashes through your eyes, one of the few glimpses of what you feel underneath that cold exterior.

“it’s not true,” he says before you attempt to answer, “because you… being around you makes me happy. when i’m not with you, i think of when i’ll see you next. you matter to me.”

you’re not sure what’s worse — the fact that you reciprocate his feelings or the words that are coming out of your mouth.

“you’d do best to try and get rid of that feeling.”

but he knows there’s more lingering behind your words. “tell me you don’t feel the same way.”

“what i feel means nothing.” you state, voice laced with hurt, though not from his words. “let it go.”

“why don’t you wanna try?”

“because it’d be a disaster. for both of us.”

“c’mon,” he pleads, gently touching your fingers, “please don’t push me away.”

“god—i have my reasons, mingyu.”

“then explain them to me!”

“i can’t give you what you want!” you cry out, needing him to understand you. “someone like you just doesn’t work with someone like me. it might sound stupid, but it’s the truth. i wouldn’t tell you i love you, i’m fucking—bitter and cynical, if not misanthropic, i like my own peace and quiet, i fucking hate talking about what i feel — and you are the complete opposite. i’d make you miserable. you’d grow to hate me.”

“no, i wouldn’t.”

“you would. you... i do like you. i don’t know what the hell you did, like—it’s bizarre how much i’ve grown to like you. but at the end of the day, we’d never work, because i cannot give you the love that you deserve. i know you. you want someone spontaneous, easygoing, sociable — those are all traits that i don’t have. i wish i did, but that’s just how i’m engineered. we wouldn’t work.”

“how do you even know that?”

“i’ve had two boyfriends before this. both broke things off with me ‘cause i didn't show love the way they were used to, and even when they called it quits, i didn’t show a thing. because i don’t do that. no matter how often i say it, no one ever appears to understand what they’re getting themselves into when they get close to me, so i’m telling you now. this? you and me?” you ask, finger pointing between the two of you. “we’d be idiots to try.”

“fine. then consider me an idiot.” he breathes out, just barely registering how close he’s standing to you. “i’m willing to try. please.”

the crease between your brows is the sign of your inner conflict. “i’m sick of getting hurt. sick of people making me feel like my feelings aren’t valid solely because i don’t like expressing them.”

“i’m not gonna hurt you. we can take things slow.”

“gyu—” you plead, almost like you’re begging him to stop tearing your walls down despite knowing he won’t.

and perhaps the other part of you does want to let him in. it’s so scary, so tempting.

“i don’t wanna lose you.”

he adores you so much — it’s ridiculous. “you won’t lose me. please…” he touches your fingers so gently, getting closer to you as you barely make an effort to push him away, “please let me in.”

his heartbeat rises when you look him in the eye — he wonders how the hell a person so strong can look so afraid. but he’s determined to show that you have no reason to be anymore.

it’s raining even harder now. instead of backing you up against the wall, he takes a few steps away from you as if he’s leaving, only for him to turn around and gesture for you to come with him.

mingyu’s smile shines even in the heavy downpour — a bright light that balances out your dull one.

he extends his hand, and you finally get over the edge of your fear, finally able to take control of your own body and slide your hand in his.

you and kim mingyu shouldn’t work — perhaps that’s exactly the reason why you do.

thank you for reading. let me know if you enjoyed it x

® SANAKIRAS — do not repost, remake or copy my work in any way whatsoever. translations are not allowed.

[clawsdevour]

treasure map

wc: 2.1k content warning: post-time skip, established relationship, hinata x reader, hc that hinata loves tanlines, face fuck, smut, fingering, kitchen sex, not proofread

𓂂 ْ メ𓈒༷

Back from your afternoon swim, you are completely red and throbbing due to the radiating sun that resonated throughout your entire body. Laying back down on your dry and somewhat gritty towel due to the sand, you rested momentarily before taking off to get back home for lunch.

Kicking off your sandals, rushing to get to the shower to get rid of the sticky and salty sea water from your pinkish skin. Your husband, Hinata Shoyo, is surprisingly home early from his beach volleyball practice with his team. His head turned from the kitchen counter upon your entrance seeing how burnt your skin became from one afternoon swimming session.

The nice cool shower made your skin immediately feel relieved as it felt like the throbbing pain was sizzled off despite your new appearance. Doing your usual everything shower routine to feel clean once more before hopping out with a towel covering your entire being. Hair slicked back, damp with the fresh cold water. You steadily open the glass door and step out, gripping onto the bathroom floormat in case you slip. 

Looking up from your toes, you see yourself staring back at you in the reflection. However, like mentioned, very sunburnt and still visibly red. Your untouched parts of your skin as you lowered your towel to use for your hair, showed you your protected areas of skin due to the straps of your bathing suit. The heat radiating, making you start to sweat the moment you settled down.

Quickly you started to dry your hair the best you could with the slightly already damp towel and throw on your clothes to get ready for your lunch with Hinata. Your wet hair was left to airdry while you put your towel back on the hook before heading out of the bathroom.

Walking out, the ginger’s eyes are lingering at your wet hair straight out of the shower. And lower, to your shoulders that showed him the lines left from your afternoon swim that was barely covered by your tank top.

“You’re burnt babe, how long did you swim?” Hinata’s beady eyes bore into you whilst heading towards you to check on the condition of your flesh. His fingertips rubbing gentle small circles on your nonburnt areas.

“Not that long.. it’ll be fine in a few days. Now let’s get some lunch Shoyo, I’m starving” locking your arm around his to lead him to the front door for some delicious food you was boutta devour the moment it’s set on your tablle.

Almost two days pass by, your red blistering skin starting to turn into a rich bronzy tan. You’ve noticed recently how Hinata’s been eyeing you more, making you wonder if something’s up. The tanlines grew more noticeable. That’s what drew him closer to you. It’s like looking for treasure with a treasure map to guide his imagination.

That night while you were cooking up a supper for the two of you, he couldn't help but stare at the tanline that rises upon your hips from your lowrise booty shorts that covered barely anything. Hinata’s shakey hands come out of nowhere to hug you from behind. If he can’t see what drew him to you, then he wouldn’t need to resist. Or so he thought. A large hand slithered its way up your top, cupping your right breast while catching you in surprise.

“You’re funny Shoyo. Food’s almost done, I know you’re hungry.” Of course you think this is his regular little tauntings whenever he sees you standing there cooking dinner and just looking all cute for him with those short shorts. You had no idea it was your bright tanlines that kept him on his toes for the past few days.

“Yeah, but I’m not hungry for food..” a hot breath tickles the crook of your ear, his increasing erection is slightly pressed against the crevice of your ass. You’re caught in a gasp before turning off the stove and putting on the lid. Playfully exchanging a snarky smirk with him.

His lips make its way to yours, starting off softly to passionately making his way into your mouth to explore everything you had in store for him. Turning around to face him, his hands are on your waist, sliding down to fondle your ass as if he was kneading dough. 

Pausing a moment to catch your breath, eyes staring directly into each other. Hot and steamy breaths were exchanged between you two before you wrapped your arms around his muscular neck. Jumping into his arms, you continue to pepper his face with your gentle kisses while he’s carrying you up onto the cold kitchen counter. Hinata couldn’t care less about where he fucked you numb, as long as he’s able to explore where that tanline led him to.

The moment he laid you on your back was when he completely tore off your shorts and threw it behind him, leaving you a bit shook even though it barely covered your ass anyway. While you closed your knees shut from humiliation, he parted them open like the red sea for all his eyes to gawk on.

“Ha.. you embarrassed?” a snicker appearing on his face while he huffed in excitement. His fingers reach to circle your clit, pussy already glistening from all the intimate kissing. His eyes are taking in the scene of your attractive swimsuit tanline that marked down where your leaking pussy was, dick pressing against his pants more than ever.

Stripping off your remaining top, your bright nipples perk up due to the chilled air in your house. Hinata’s scanning every inch of your body in satisfaction, increasing the speed in his fingers to stimulate you further before putting a digit in hearing you moan the moment he pressed a centimeter in. 

Your moans were as sweet as honey that resonated in his ears. He loves knowing how good he’s able to make you feel. He’s continuously going down knuckle deep into your gaping hole that yearned for more. Adding in another finger for your pleasure, he’s going ham while watching your expressions twist for only his eyes to watch.

“Kiss me Shoyo..” arms up to reach for him, to which he obliged. He’s plummeting two fingers into your sopping wet cunt, each thrust a little more powerful than the previous. Moaning into the kiss due to the pleasure, Hinata can’t take it anymore. The built up tent in his pants was so frustrating he could tear off his shorts that instant.

He’s pulling away, leaving you whining for more of his touch. Fingers out of you as well to hastily take off his t-shirt, showing you his rippling complexion from the extensive beach volleyball training. His broad shoulders also showing a tanline from his usual sports tank tops. His fingers reach for his waist band until you stopped him with your hands. 

“Let me do it too, I can’t have you doing all the work” pouting in annoyance, his hands move to his sides in approval while you pull his shorts down. His erection was standing nice and tall all whilst staring back at you, leaving your mouth salivating.

Your lips hover over his angry tip, licking off the precum while he lets out a small whimper of satisfaction from the foreign sensation your tongue created. His cute reactions make you feel delighted as you started to go down on his length, watching him try to resist. The warm and wet feeling floods him all over, breathing quivering from all the stimulation. Ginger locks of hair tilted back to take in all of the pleasure you’re giving him.

You’re going at your own pace, squelching noises and groans were made. Until you felt his fingers grip onto your head, helping you articulate to further satisfy him. Hinata was so close, but had to endure cumming before you did.

Tears started to form in your eyes whenever his tip hit the back of your throat, essentially leaving a bruise left to be healed. Your delicate fingers have a deafening grip on his hips while he starts to thrust into your mouth, making you lose all control. 

Biting into his lower lip, he’s slowing down his thrusts until he pulls out. Clear but foamy strings followed his dick while he created heated distance between you two. Your eyes are groggy with tears, trying to recover after his rough face fucking that you know you both enjoyed. 

“You look so pretty like this.” Hinata’s caressing your cheeks, wiping the tears off your flushed red face. He’s helping you up before sitting you down on the kitchen counter again.

Spreading your legs open for him, you urge him to enter. You couldn’t wait any longer. Slick collected upon his entrance, you squint your eyes feeling him attempt to slide in. Your walls having to adjust to his girth, stretching it to mold his cock like your pussy was his.

When Hinata’s all situated inside you, he’s gradually thrusting while increasing his speed. Soon the loud skin on skin slapping noises began. His fingers are tracing over the tanlines on your shoulder, lips kissing the surface of your bronze skin.

“So good Shoyo..!” praising him while your plush walls clamp tight on his delicious size, hands trying to grab onto the edge of the counter with each deep plunge. His poundings weren’t just fast paced, but they grew deeper within each thrust, trying to explore your insides like a cave.

He was out of his mind, as if he was drunk off your pussy. The super visible tanlines drew him into a perverted frenzy trying to see what it’d look like without your clothes teasing him. He couldn’t help himself, nor his painful erection that grew more with the thought of you just getting undressed. The sight of your tan skin, divided by your regular skin tone like you had on your swimsuit was such an erotic sight he had in mind. Fucking you like this drove him absolutely crazy.

When he found your sweet spot, it was over for you. The moment his tip pressed against it in discovery was when Hinata started to thrust into it with all of his remaining might. You became a moaning mess while it echoed off your kitchen walls, legs starting to squirm around his broad and muscular figure. The heat pooling up at the pits of your stomach, soon to erupt like a volcano when it was at its peak.

“M’gonna c-cum..” you panted out between tired and high pitched whimpers. Your half lidded gaze ended up with your eyes being rolled back when it happened, seeing white.

You came so hard it was as if you started to see sparks of the hot molten lava fly in the air whenever a volcano would erupt. Hinata’s slowing down his pace after you’ve creamed all over his cock, a white rim of froth forming on the base of his girth. His fingers latch onto your nipple, flicking it around to tease you, testing if you’re able to go for another round. 

“We’re not done yet. I need to cum too.” His golden brown eyes watching you with a big smirk plastered on his lips. 

Moving his fingers lower, he’s back to playing with your swollen clit once again. Small and sensational circles was the way to go. You’re twitching with every slow but gaping thrust he’s continuously plunging into you, creating that build up that was able to match with his stamina.

He’s been holding back for so long, but he wants to keep going so bad. 

Unfortunately he’s peaked his high. Whipping it out right before he was about to cum inside, but he wouldn’t let that happen without your decision. His cock glistening from your juices, spraying its gooey white strips onto your tanlines, coating you in his essence. You’re watching him stroke his cock further while he’s emptying his load onto you, head tilted groaning out in contentness. You’re sprawled out on the couch yearning for the cold air to hit your face.

Despite you being all covered in his own cum, Hinata’s not afraid to let his body collapse on you even for a brief moment. Essentially, somewhat giving you an intimate hug with all his left over power he was able to muster. His fluffy ginger hair in the crook of your neck, peering up at you. His sleepy brown eyes make contact with yours while he’s mumbling into your neck.

“Have to explore every inch of you next time.”

masterlist here

[rindreamery]

HALLO NISHI !! congratulations on reaching 300 followers, i’m so proud of you!! i’m always so excited seeing ur works 🍀

for your cafe event i wanted to order rin, sweet flavor, laying your head on their chest + best friends to lovers ><

ORDER 5: READY TO GO !

rin + sweet + laying your head on their chest + best friends to lovers w.c. 1.4k+

note. thank you rurumi <33 once again, exceeded 1k+ but are we even surprised atp? i literally dk how to make my fics shorter LMAO (and again, ty minjee for proofreading)

interested in more? check out the lounge !

starting your morning by waking up wrapped in someone’s arms was unexpected, to say the least. 

as you started to make sense of your surroundings, trying to blink away the traces of sleep, you came to realization that you must have knocked out from exhaustion. that would be the only logical reasoning as to why your apartment was in the state that it was. an absolute mess. wrappers from your midnight snacks were still scattered on the ground, and you could make out the blurry outline of a mug of some drink, placed on the console table, across the room. the music from your playlist, one you vaguely remember putting on last night, was still quietly playing from your phone. it was somewhere in the room, but your mind was foggy, and you couldn’t recall where you had last placed it. 

you didn’t care all that much, though. there were more pressing issues, starting with the first. you winced as you tried to lift your head, immediately placing your head back down as the feeling overwhelmed you. there was a slight throbbing and pressure on the crown of your head, your whole body felt heavy, and your eyes were blurry and unfocused— a product of countless all-nighters. every once and a while, you would be hit with the sensation of pinching in your brain, and you would have to bite back a groan each time. 

there was that issue, and then there was this. maybe the effects of sleep deprivation were finally starting to catch up with you. because, frankly, you weren’t sure how you ended up in this position. one minute, you were slumped over the coffee table, with piles of notes and textbooks scattered across its surface, trying to make sense of the words as they all blurred into one blurry block. somewhere along the way, the feeling of sleepiness had crept over you, one that you had desperately tried to stave off.

evidently, it won. because the next minute, you were waking up— you tried to crane your head to glance upwards, and your heart stilled for a second— in rin’s arms?

in this situation, your initial reaction typically would’ve been to flinch, immediately jump out of his arms, and potentially wake him up and aggravate him along the way. but your body was still exhausted, and he was much more inviting and comfier than you had anticipated him to be. (well, not that you thought about laying on his chest often. definitely not.) admittedly, a part of you didn’t want to leave. 

the steady rise and fall of his chest was soothing, and with the side of your head pressed against his chest, you could hear the slow and rhythmic beating of his heart. his body felt warm against yours, a contrast to the chilly winter air that slipped past your windows, and he was your equivalent to a blanket. this position had also given you a somewhat unobstructed view of his face. he looked serene, at peace, the calmest he’s probably ever been. the semi-permanent crease between his brows had softened into a more passive state, and the frown of his lips was nowhere to be seen. it was a rare sight to see.

you realized that this would be the closest you would ever be to him (though, unintentionally, you think?) so, of course you wanted to stay, but you knew better. you tried to wiggle your way out of his arms, but his hold on you was surprisingly firm. 

you took a deep breath, shifting slightly, trying to reach behind you to peel his arms off of you. he’s stubborn, even in his sleep, you realize, and his arms go right back to where they were the second you take them off. you bite the inside of your cheek, trying not to sigh out of frustration, careful to not wake him up. but it’s uncomfortable reaching behind you for extended periods of time, and your shoulders were starting to cramp from stretching backwards. and after two more failed attempts, you give up, letting your arm awkwardly rest at your sides.

you lay there, frozen and at a loss for what to do. then, your mind starts to spiral. would he get mad? will he yell at you? will he push you off and onto the floor the second he wakes up? the twitching of rin’s hand, his palms sliding over from the small of your back to the sides of your waist, snaps you out of it. 

you glance up at him, hoping he wouldn’t be awake, just to be met with teal eyes staring right back at you. you throw him a sheepish and awkward smile as he blinks at you, before you look away. looking anywhere but him. another second passes, and he blinks again— “you’re up,” he points out, voice rough from sleep, and completely unphased. 

“yeah,” you respond, trying to act casual. your heart was in overdrive at this point, and you were mildly confused at the lack of reaction from him. was he not mad? “looks like i fell asleep on you, haha.” internally, you cringe at your awkward laugh. 

he blinks again, clearly still under the haziness of sleep. 

he doesn’t respond to you immediately, however, instead grunting as he moved so that you weren’t practically falling off of him and the couch. which, you hadn't even noticed up until that point. but you were now directly laying on top of him, cheek smushed against the fabric of his shirt, feeling his muscles flex with each movement, and becoming increasingly aware of just how close he really was. (it hit you before, but it was really hitting you now.) 

“you fell right on top of me and then knocked out,” he finally responds, after a few seconds. completely brushing over the fact that he had essentially pulled you closer, rather than pushing you away. acting normal. “you were studying hard, so didn’t wanna wake you.”

“...oh,” you mutter dumbly. it was all you could think to say. “oops. sorry.” 

rin scoffs at the lame apology, but there was softness in his eyes as he glanced down at you, one that told you that he probably wasn’t as annoyed as he tried to make himself out to be. “don’t get used to it,” he mutters, though, there was no malice in his voice. “and don’t overwork yourself.”

there’s a thump in your heart, and you ignore it. 

“yep, noted.” you agree. there’s a momentary pause as you collect yourself, wondering what to say next and whether you should finally get up. though your heart was begging you not to, your mind was trying to be logical. “i should probably get up now, i still have some material to review.” 

but rin’s response is immediate, this time. “you’re still sleepy, aren’t you?” his deep voice was still as flat as ever— yet, with a hint of gentleness? oddly adamant about not letting go of you, but you don’t question it. “just go back to sleep, i don’t care.”

he was trying to avoid saying, "i don't mind," but you know him better than that.

your eyes widen at his words, shooting to meet his gaze, and for a moment, the two of you just stare at each other. a part of you wanted to joke around and ask, what did you do with the real rin? but decided against it, at the fact that he might actually push you off this time.

maybe you were simply deflecting.

because the thought of going back to sleep in his arms, laying on his chest, made you feel weird. a good, but also anxiety-inducing, type of weird— like the feeling of swarms of butterflies fluttering uncontrollably in your stomach, or the jittery excitement passing over your body in waves, and the way your heart jumps at the idea of him letting you stay this close. it makes you feel all fuzzy inside. 

“uh— are you sure?” you try to unravel yourself from him, but his hands ever-so-slightly tighten their grip around your waist, keeping you flush against him. his nonverbal cue to make you stay. but still, “i know you don’t really like it when people are all up in your personal space, like this.”

he sighs, and you see the way he refrains from playfully rolling his eyes at you. “just go back to sleep, idiot.” 

“right, okay,” you mumble, still unsure, but letting your head rest against his chest again. it's instantaneous. one of his hands immediately creeps onto the back of your head, fingers threading through the strands of your hair, and he’s practically cradling you. you fail to fight back the contented sigh that slips past your lips at the feeling, and you don’t see the small smile on his face. “maybe just a little longer.”

and the two of you settle into one another.

rin doesn’t say anything more, letting the silence fall over the two of you as you’re lulled back into sleep. he simply adjusts his hold on you, one hand still on the back of your head, the other arm now loosely wrapped around your waist. 

“sleep well,” he mumbles softly, careful not to rouse you.

© rindreamery, 2024

[imfoive]

Crystal Bird - Chapter 10

Crown Prince! Chan x Princess (fem.) Genre: Royal au! Angst, Romance, Historical, hidden identity, slow-burn Warnings: mentions of war, assassination, somewhat proofread WC: 8.7k A/N: I debated breaking the chapter into another chapter but it would have left everyone frustrated lmaoo so this chapter is on the longer end!(although you won’t be any less frustrated anyways) Feedback, Reblogs, Likes are greatly appreciated! Happy reading! ── MASTERLIST

Synopsis: The Crown Prince is saved by the Princess of a rival kingdom, and he swears his second life to his savior. A forbidden friendship no one knew of, grows deeper with every secret meeting. As the two are kept apart, memories of their sunset playdates by the serene river, begin blossoming into something beautiful. Cheeks blushed, stomach butterflies fluttered at the thought of each other. Years of yearning and imagining had only made them crave a sweeter reunion. And finally meeting at a Royal banquet, he could only stare at the now grown Princess, taken by her beauty, while she only watches as he gives his heart to the wrong princess.

Missed a chapter? - Prologue / Chapter 1 / Chapter 2 / Chapter 3 / Chapter 4 / Chapter 5 / Chapter 6 / Chapter 7 / Chapter 8 / Chapter 9

CHAPTER 10 ───────────────────

The Sylvancrest Prince had met all kinds of people during his travels, friendly merchants, citizens from neighboring realms, some questionable, but all in all, good people. Even back in the Eastern Sea nation, he was always greeted with warmth. Always garnered attention as the youngest of princes.

Yet, surprisingly, the fourth prince had never really had any true friends of his own.

His brothers had always had their own responsibilities, and although they doted on him, they never quite found the time to entertain him for long. Other kids his age played with him, but they always made him feel the heavy weight of the prince title he carried.

His guard, Seungmin, who was close to his age, was almost the exact opposite in personality.

Quiet, dutiful, and frigid. Although Hyunjin had managed to get Seungmin to crack here and there, even drawing out small moments of mischief and fun, there was always a line the guard never crossed. Much like those playmates of his.

And it was this Foreign princess, who made him understand, for the first time, what it meant to have something like a true friend. Someone to share cheerful banter, long conversations with. About all kinds of things that piqued their curiosity. Unbiased, free. 

Someone who focused on him, on whatever he rambled about, with an enthusiasm that matched his own. Similar rambles slipped from her lips, and her eyes radiated with the ambition to see the world, to learn more.

Even if they hadn’t known each other as long as they felt like they did, it was clear that the two were alike, that their friendship was something that was unguarded, comfortable. They had even promised to keep in touch after his return, exchanging letters filled with thoughts and discoveries, things he was certain she would enjoy reading.

He had never exchanged letters with a friend before, never received anything of the sort himself. The idea of it excited him, in a way he hadn’t expected. Prominent in his glowing expressions that expressed his feelings easily.

But after the events over the past few days, Hyunjin began to notice something different. His friend’s smile no longer reached her eyes. Her mind seemed elsewhere, her presence across from him, but her thoughts clearly distant.

Then he remembered the Elysium King’s offer. The ridiculous proposition he still couldn’t fully grasp. 

Hyunjin’s gaze lingered on the second princess. She attempted to smile as she dismissed her “slight fever,” but the weariness in her expression was unmistakable. 

It was clear to him that she wasn’t happy here. Perhaps she never had been, and likely never would be.

In a kingdom where being the daughter of the king’s mistress, a lower-princess, earned you nothing but scorn, where arrows and bitter glances followed, true happiness was a distant dream for someone like her.

Hyunjin didn’t have any particular romantic feelings for his new friend, at least not yet. But he believed they could get along just fine. He believed he could make her happy. Perhaps she could join him in his travels, explore new lands, chasing that ambitious curiosity of hers through new experiences. The kind she’s only read about.

Hyunjin didn’t think he would propose such a thing today. To offer her an escape from this place. He knew well that a princess like her could only leave through marriage. If necessary, he would offer her that. 

He would marry her, if it meant she could have the freedom she deserved.

He would be a good friend. 

He was being good friend. But as the offer laid out bare, his words easily slipping through his lips, he caught the frantic twinge that flashed in her eyes.

A similar gaze he had seen just the day prior in someone else.

Someone who stood stoic, piercing gaze boring into his amidst the dense foliage of The Grand Forest.

Hyunjin sighed, a soft smile tugging at his lips before he chuckled, the familiar sound breaking the tension that had settled in the air.

   “It’s too bad.” His words had come out casually, not even a hint disappointed, gaze never leaving her now, taken aback by his sudden shift. 

The Second Princess stared at him in wonder.

It seemed as though he’d rescinded his proposal just as quickly as he had offered it.

Hyunjin leaned back in his seat, relaxing against the cushion of his chair.

Princess Y/N opened her mouth, her next words lodged in her throat.

Did she acknowledge his roundabout proposal? Replying with an answer they both knew? 

Or perhaps apologize for rejecting him without even considering?

Instead, Y/N gave a slight smile, tilting her head as she spoke.

   “Do write to me about the lakes, Hyunjin.”

The informal words, the title-less address, made Hyunjin’s grin widen. Their friendship seemingly deepened with a simple rejection.

A comfortable silence settled between them. 

Princess Y/N reached over to place his novel back where she had taken it from. He sipped his tea, before suddenly placing it back down with a clatter, as if some idea just flashed through his mind. Already moving onto the next topic.

   “I might take a detour instead. Perhaps explore some more before my father tries to tie me down with responsibilities.” He groaned at the thought.

Y/N raised an eyebrow, confused. 

   “A detour?” She questioned with a repeat. 

Hyunjin nodded enthusiastically.

   “Yes, maybe head up North—I’ve only seen snow once as a child, what a fascinating sight it was.” He almost rambled, his eyes lighting up.

   “Snow?” Y/N’s eyes widened with its own excitement, her interest piqued. 

The idea of seeing something she had only read about in books sparked a new fascination. Trying to imagine the white expanse of the soft snow covered ground.

   “I’ve never seen snow. Is it really that cold?” Her words were laced with new curiousity, one that made the foreign prince chuckle as he shook his head.

   “I can tell you all about the Sylvancrest lakes Y/N, but I’m no expert on the Northern Snow. Maybe one day, you’ll visit that place instead.”

His words lingered between them, and Y/N’s smile faltered. Her gaze slowly drifted to the biscuits between them, her thoughts slipping back to the expert of the Northern Snow.

The White Mountains where he had been, were filled with snowy terrains. It must have been greuling.

He must have been cold. Must have fallen sick countless times.

Her heart ached suddenly, and she couldn’t help but curse herself for so many of her wrong choices.

But Y/N knew she was going to continue to make these wrong choices.

Continue to push away the Crown Prince of Nightshade.

A love so tragic she would rather keep him in the dark than let him be kept away from her.

And as Y/N stood on her balcony that evening, staring out into the dark night, she couldn’t help but be drawn back to thoughts about Chan, couldn’t help but think about him again.

It was always like this.

Where once she would gleefully read her love stories, picturing a mysterious man, someone handsome, someone who was madly in love with her. Someone who was her Chan. 

Now as she pictured him, handsome, perhaps in love with her.

She couldn’t be giddy. Couldn’t let those emotions that made her cheeks twinge with pink and red, her skin burn with heat, warm and fuzzy, take over.

Chan was no longer hers.

Chan had a face. A handsome man, grown into all the things Y/N had once fantasized. Chan was real.

To the touch, to the kiss.

But Chan wasn’t hers. Chan was the Crown Prince. 

Prince Christopher, who loved the girl that had once saved him, because he must.

And even if deep down she knew it was pathetic to draw such a conclusion, she decided it was true. For her own sake.

Y/N had dwelled on it. Her mind spun with thoughts that never seemed to settle.

Thinking. Deciding. Doubting.

Over and over again.

She thought back to when she had lied to him. The hidden truth, nothing near a little white lie she had tried so hard to convince herself it was. Aware deep down that it was a cruel one. 

That her denial of being that princess that once saved an enemy prince, befriended, made promises, was the right thing to do.

The lie that had taken life from her lack of confidence, her self-doubts, snowballed into something she couldn’t control.

Then, it hit her. A realization that should have come to her long ago. One that lingered deep in her chest, spilling out with every encounter. A realization waiting to be made.

Her heart clenched painfully as she finally made a clear-headed decision, as the weight of it all sank in. 

Y/N didn’t deserve any of it.

His friendship. His loyalty. His lingering gazes, dimpled smiles.

His love.

She had trampled on his hopes. Her lies twisted so deeply, that she was certain he would hate her once he found out. 

The truth of how she had toyed with his heart. How she was going to continue to hurt him. He should hate her.

It was the right decision. She had to believe it. 

The fairytale stories she had once dreamed of belonged in novels, not in her life. They were things she should never have expected, let alone hoped for.

Could she really have expected anything else?

He was the Crown Prince of an enemy nation. One her family was preparing to assassinate. To go to battle against. Starting a war that they would perhaps lose.

Maybe she would perish along. 

Y/N thought back. Thought of Chan. 

Chan who wasn’t hers. Who belonged to his nation, his title, his crown.

Prince Christopher who belonged to his people.

Their friendship had been doomed from the moment she’d pulled him from that river, from the moment she had wandered back into the forest the day after.

Tears slid easily down her face, pooling at her jaw as she stared into the dark, moonlit night. She struggled to convince herself that this decision, this painful separation, was the right one.

He should return. But he should never know the truth. He should believe that Sienna wasn’t the one he should love. 

That the princess he sought, no longer existed. 

He’ll be hurt, he'll suffer a bit. Saying goodbye to a promise that he failed to keep, a reunion that would never happen. 

But he’ll be fine.

There was going to be nothing tying him to back Elysium. Nothing tying him to her. 

He would protect his nation, his people, like he should as the Crown Prince.

And even if she perished somewhere along the way, his thoughts won’t dwell on it.

His heart shouldn’t ache, he shouldn’t be in pain.

The sobs were impossible to control, her face contorting as she cried, palms pressing against her lips to muffle the sounds.

She longed to see him. To hold him, just one last time before she let him go forever. But she knew she couldn’t. If she did, the resolve she had fought so hard to build would shatter in an instant. 

All Y/N wanted, all she needed, was for him to return.

Safely. And she would make sure that happened.

────────────────────────

The preparations for Elysium’s Royal wedding had begun. 

The Crown Prince of the nation was finally to wed his fiancee. A daughter of a powerful noble. The eldest daughter of a Duke, one that had been picked out ever since they were children. 

The banquets, the dinners, the revelry that had started off these celebrations had all been leading up to this union and the ceremonies that followed. One that seemed to be dragging on for weeks, and finally the end was nearing.

It was supposedly a grand occasion, one which the whole kingdom was to look forward to. 

But as Y/N made her way through the town square, her well-kept appearance and the knight who trailed closely behind her made her rank clear. 

A high-society noble, perhaps even royalty. 

And with that, she immediately caught the wary glances of the townspeople. It had been months since she’d been allowed to walk freely through the market, and though her lavish appearance had attracted attention before, this time it was different. The locals seemed to regard her with a quiet…distaste, as if her presence here was an unwelcome reminder of something they resented.

Just as Anna had mentioned, Princess Y/N was witnessing it firsthand. The disdain the people held for the nobles and the royal family was evident in every glance they shot her way. It seemed to grow stronger with each passing day the King failed to address the suffering caused by the Fading Ill and the misfortunes that had befallen the poor. The weight of these frustrations was clear in the eyes that peered over in her direction.

She couldn’t blame them. 

The slum dwellers, the poor. The lower class, and the everyday merchants. They were fed up with a King who seemed to care only for the upperclass. The celebrations felt drawn out, flaunting wealth while the people suffered. The cold season was approaching, and the Fading Ill disease continued to spread, yet the King had done nothing. 

No words of comfort, no aid sent to those in need. No search for a cure.

From the outside the kingdom seemed to be harmonious, coming together to celebrate the royal union. Yet, the contrast between the royal festivities and the people’s struggles was impossible to ignore once you got a closer look.

Y/N had ravaged the Nightshade Books she could find on sickness, cures, poisons, that the Elysium library carried, yet still there wasn’t much she could find. Perhaps, if she could slip into a herbal shop or medical tent, she might learn more about this sickness from someone who had treated patients firsthand.

The Second Princess watched the dressmaker, giving orders to her seamstresses to pack the fabrics that had been pre-approved months ago. She glanced around at the maids who accompanied her, each carrying boxes of trinkets and accessories the future Princess consort had also chosen, now ready for pickup.

Y/N’s gaze dropped to her lap, her fingers fidgeting with her own rings. Her eyes traced the intricate fabric of the dress she wore. Symbols of the wealth and high status the townspeople likely saw her as. But in that moment, she felt more like a well-dressed errand girl.

Perhaps the Queen Mother took some twisted pleasure in assigning Y/N these menial tasks. Maybe she relished the fury that coursed through Lady Katherine whenever the mistress learned of the discrimination, often taking it out on Y/N. As if the daughter had any choice but to bow her head and follow orders.

Their return from Melgarde had emboldened her mother, making Y/N wonder how the older woman would react once she lost this small sliver of importance, the fleeting power she would lose after Ian's wedding. 

Once everything returned to its original order. 

Once Y/N returned to being nothing but the forgotten princess.

But for now, she had been left to manage these kinds of responsibilities while Sienna entertained the new guests arriving as the wedding day approached.

She should have felt envious, felt that sting of injustice whenever she had to take on Sienna’s workload, when she was given such lowly tasks, handling duties a “princess” like herself should never have to do. 

Yet, oddly, she felt a sense of relief. 

The chaos of the preparations offered an escape from the ever-watchful gaze of Chan. His piercing stare, always following her whenever their paths crossed, hadn't gone unnoticed. Especially after the other night. The ghost of his lips working against hers, still tingled whenever she recalled it.

But she was too afraid to do anything more than offer a quick curtsy as she passed him, her expression hardening as she clung to that new mask she decided she would wear.

After the carriage was loaded with trunks filled with new dresses and jewelry, the long line of seamstresses, along with the head-dress maker, all gathered to bid her farewell. Their presence drew attention, but it was the Princess' knight who seemed to feel the weight of it. He glanced around warily, acutely aware of the tension in the air.

   “I shall visit a herbalist.” Y/N's sudden declaration caught the young knight off guard. 

His head snapped back, a flicker of surprise in his eyes before he quickly regained his composure.

   “But Princess—”

   “It won’t take long.” She muttered curtly, turning to dismiss the dressmaker and her entourage, urging them to return to their shop.

The knight’s attempt to intervene irked her more than she cared to admit. She had wandered through the town square countless times, unaccompanied except for a maid or two trailing behind her. 

Who was he to stop her now?

Suddenly, her thoughts flashed back to the other night. The night she returned after her… rendezvous with the Nightshade Prince. At least, that was how it had felt.

After recovering from her fever, Y/N had reflected on how easily she slipped back into her chambers, unnoticed. She remembered the knight. How he'd been slumped on the ground, clearly passed out. It was almost effortless for her to sneak in and out during the dead of night while he slept, yet he still had the audacity to claim he was guarding her.

The Second Princess had seen that glint in his eyes before. The same look she often received from the attendants and ladies-in-waiting at the Queen’s palace.

That condescending look. The gazes of being looked down upon.

Of course he would, he was one of the Queen’s people after all. Assigned to her back in Melgarde Estate by aides from the Queen’s palace themselves, when it was decided that she would play a role in this fake harmonious family picture the royals attempted to paint. Although, that had been smeared long ago with the whispers of the arrow incident that still lingered throughout palace grounds.

She felt the stares as she walked down the market path, the knight trudging silently behind her. People stepped aside as she drew near. Y/N should have felt offended by the clear disdain in their gazes as they glanced back at her, but she didn’t. She was used to such scornful looks. In fact, she found herself more curious than bothered. 

How far had the neglect from their ruler gone that they couldn't even tolerate the presence of a high-society lady among them?

Her gaze shifted to the small herbal shop ahead. Her eyes raked over the exterior before she turned to her knight.

   “Stand guard here. No need to follow inside.” She ordered, her voice leaving no room for argument. 

Before the young knight could respond, she was already moving toward the door.

The medicinal scent of herbs filled the air, hitting her with a waft as soon as she entered, mixing with the faint hum of quiet voices.

The shop was small, its interior racked with shelves of dried plants, hanging shrubs, and jars filled with liquids. Behind the counter, was a curtained doorway, likely led to the herbalist’s backroom, where he concocted his remedies.

Some women lingered near the counter, their eyes instantly darting toward Y/N at the sight of her, their surprise evident on their faces. The Second Princess offered a quick, polite smile, bowing her head in greeting. The women exchanged a brief glance before returning the gesture. 

It was clear from their bewildered expressions that noblewomen rarely acknowledged people of their status.

Suddenly, the small curtain behind the counter was pulled back with a whoosh, and the herbalist appeared. He faltered mid-step as his gaze fell upon Y/N. A lady of high rank, no doubt. He cleared his throat, pushing up his glasses before addressing the two women.

   “—Apply this twice a day, and it should reduce the itch. Try not to get the infected area wet.” He instructed, in the midst of a diagnosis it seemed. 

After the women handed over their coins, they shared another cautious glance at the Princess before quickly exiting, leaving only Y/N and the herbalist. The older man, who seemed to also be the shopkeeper, settled his gaze on the out-of-place young lady.

   “How may I assist you, Miss.” He asked, his tone neutral.

Y/N hesitated, unsure how to approach her questions. She had no idea what symptoms were tied to the disease supposedly spreading in the slums, spreading into the outskirts of town. Instead, she glanced around the shop, her eyes darting over shelves, baskets of herbs, and jars of syrups. Her thoughts wander back to that one passage in the last Nightshade book she read.

   “What is a common poison?” The question was blurted out before she could think better of it, blinking back at the older man who was as stunned as she.

The herbalist’s gaze slowly narrowed as he scrutinized her. He took in her high rank once more before the Second Princess cleared her throat, taking a step closer toward the counter, standing straight as if to not appear nervous.

   “I-I’m writing a story.” She attempted to add.

It wasn’t the most believable excuse, but it was enough to make him sigh, his wary gaze softening slightly as he pieced together his own conclusions.

Noblewomen asking about poisons wasn’t unheard of. Some used them for beauty, others for darker purposes. Poisoning, murdering, common enough in the shadows of the world of nobility, especially during inheritance conflicts or out of jealousy.

And the shopkeeper had taken one glance at Y/N and easily assumed so. Although usually, he was dealing with their personal maids rather than the noblewomen themselves.

But who was he to judge? A humble herbal shop keeper who made big coins when dealing with such individuals, one who never wanted to get on the bad side of nobility.

It was unfortunate, but a young lady like her turning to poison wasn’t the most surprising thing he had encountered.

With a final shake of his head, he disappeared behind the curtain to the backroom. She watched, eyes laced with curiosity, fidgeting with her gloves. After a few moments, the herbalist returned, glasses pushed up again.

On the counter, he set down a vial containing what looked like a simple dried plant, a few dried berries. Perhaps even just a small stem, preserved in the thin glass tube.

   “It’s the most common, but a potent poison.” His words were curt, yet still made Y/N flinch, never really thinking about poisons, let alone seeing one.

   “Deadly Nightshade.” He continued, the name of it made her heart skip a beat, her gaze snapping up to meet his. 

However he seemed unphased, continuing to speak as if it was a script memorized. But still, the Princess noticed how his tone had dropped to something quieter, almost... cautious.

   “You can grind it to powder. You can cook it into food. Or ingest it just as. The berries, are the most toxic.” He whispered, lowering his voice even more.

Y/N only stared, her eyes blinking at the thing that looked like any common shrubbery she had seen.

The name of it instantly made her think of the Nightshade Kingdom, of the Nightshade Crown Prince. The man who drifted through her memories, his touches burning on her skin like poison itself.

   “I-I’ll take it.” She found herself muttering, her fingers raking under her robed hood to pull out her pouch of coins.

   “—But you shall also tell me more about the Fading Ill sickness.” 

The pouch, fat and full, had clanked against the counter, making the shopkeeper blink almost bewildered anew, by both her question and her actions.

   “Fading Ill?” The repeated words fell through his lips as he eyed the pouch of coins.

   “It’s a spreading disease.” His obvious information made Y/N mentally groan almost, brows furrowing as she leaned in.

   “Of course I know that. What are the symptoms?” She pressed, forgetting all about her nervous fidgeting amidst her thirst for answers.

The herbalist fell silent for a speck of a moment before he let out a chuckle, head shaking.

   “Do you?” He raised a brow, watching as Y/N’s taken aback expression looked back at him.

   “The high-ranking nobles have stayed ignorant of the lower classes’ troubles.” He continued, the edge of cynicism in his voice. 

The older man reached for the pouch of coins, taking a glimpse inside to ensure the amount vaguely as he spoke.

   “The symptoms start pretty mild, like a common cold. But once it holds, there’s persistent fatigue, a faint but unsettling cough, and strange, fleeting visions.” He looked up to Y/N, watching the young noblewoman absorb his words.

   “There’s coughing of blood and the patient begins withering from the inside.”

The herbalist watched her eyes widen at the implications of death. Those unfortunate souls who couldn’t fight the illness, didn’t have the means to cure themselves, had simply begun fading away, succumbing to the disease. 

He sighed, his hand tapping against the wooden counter, signaling the end of these kinds of talk. The rhythmic sound pulled her back from her thoughts.

   “They’ve ignored the cries for help. The diseases that run rampant. It’s surprising to see a young noble lady asking questions about it.”

His words echoed everything Y/N had encountered. Whatever Anna had recounted, whatever she had seen and felt ever since she stepped into town.

   “You don’t intend to ingest this poison in attempts to cure the sickness do you?” The herbalist’s tone turned incredulous again, his eyes darting between the Princess and the vial.

She immediately shook her head, getting rid of his suspicions almost instantly.

   “Deadly Nightshade can be used as medicine for certain things, when concocted properly. But no one in Elysium knows enough about it, or the disease, to even attempt to make a cure. The people continue to suffer, while our ruler refuses to find said cure.” The shopkeeper muttered the latter part under his breath, moreso to himself as he secured the vial tightly, placing it in front of her to take. 

Then, as silence stretched on between them, he realized what he had said.

Words that questioned the royal family, the King. And he had spoken them in front of a high-ranking noblewoman. If she reported him—

   “I’ll overlook what you’ve dared to say.” Y/N said quickly, her voice cold as she gripped the vial and nodded toward him. 

   “But you’ll forget my purchase.”

Without sparing him another glance, she exited the shop. 

The Second Princess didn’t truly intend to purchase the vial of the poisonous shrub, but the weight of it in her grip was undeniable as she stood outside the herbal shop. The glass container felt heavy, almost suffocating against her chest, made worse by the constant presence of her guard. She clutched it close, hoping her anxiety wasn’t visible on her face.

Damn it.

It would be disastrous for a princess like herself to be seen with poison, and she regretted not picking up a simple scent pouch instead. But there was no turning back now.

Her knight trailed behind her as she walked with confidence, though the nervousness swirling inside her didn’t show. She was doing well. Really well, too.

The journey back was short, maybe felt even shorter than when they had left for town. Maintaining a facade that didn’t draw any suspicious glances her way, Y/N hid the vial under her robe.

The attendants and maids had rushed to unload the carriages, bustling with the trunks of fabrics and trinkets she had brought with her. Her knight’s attention was briefly diverted to the servants darting past him, giving Y/N a head start.

She glanced over her shoulder, hoping her knight remained occupied by the attendants, his path blocked. 

She couldn’t afford for him to see her holding the vial. 

She couldn’t afford for anyone to see it. Unable to even fathom what sort of consequences would follow.

But, of course, that was bound to happen. With her head turning back to repeatedly glance over her shoulder, she didn’t notice the collision until it was too late.

Her body swayed as she instinctively reached out to steady herself by holding onto the person she had bumped into. Once grounded, her widening eyes met Prince Christopher’s equally stunned gaze. His grip on her forearm was firm, holding her up. An unexpectedly intimate position, though not as much as their last close encounter.

Chris’ gaze immediately flicked to her hand, noticing the vial she still gripped tightly. The vibrant color of the dried plant was unmistakable in her fingers. His brow furrowed with a frown, but before he could speak, Y/N recoiled, a sharp gasp escaping her lips as she swiftly pulled her arm under the cover of her hood, hiding the tube.

   “Princess!” The knight had caught up, his stance instantaneously rigid as he positioned himself in front of her. 

His wary gaze swept over the Warrior Prince and his guard. One that made Han step forward, his own intense expression fixed on the young knight, silently sizing him up.

Y/N hadn’t even noticed Han until now, her focus had remained on Prince Christopher from the moment they collided. But now, she couldn’t even bring herself to meet his gaze.

   “Let us head back.” She said, her tone shifting to one of authority, attempting to ease the tension that had settled between them. 

   “There’s much to do.” She glanced back at her knight, the one who had always been defensive around the Nightshade warriors, his Elysium training evident in his watchful eyes. 

The knight relaxed his stance, crossing his arms behind him as he nodded.

Y/N could sense Chris wanted to say something, maybe about the vial he had clearly seen, or about the strange way she had been avoiding him lately. But she wouldn’t allow him to speak. She dipped her head in a quick, dismissive farewell, cutting any potential conversation short.

The Nightshade warriors watched her retreating figure, and Chris felt a familiar annoyance bubble up inside him. The Second Princess was always so cautious, yet always seemed to be running from something. From someone. 

Running from him. 

   “Was that what I think it was?” Han’s voice broke through Chris’ frustrated thoughts, pulling his attention back to his friend. 

The Warrior Prince slid his hands into his pockets, his gaze fixed on Y/N's path.

   “It seemed so.” Chris muttered, his focus still on her.

Han groaned, irritation flashing across his face as he began to piece together the implications of what had just occurred. 

What did she plan to do with that poison? 

Perhaps they truly intended to lace it into his Prince’s tea. The mere thought made the guard clench his fists.

He glanced at Chris, who was still fixated on the direction Y/N had gone. Han knew his friend well enough to see the obsession in his gaze. 

Perhaps he would happily drink any poison-laced drink given to him by her.

────────────────────────

Felix stood rigid at the door, his eyes scanning the prominent figures gathered in King Bahng’s meeting room. The tension in the air was thick, a heaviness that even Commander Seo’s youngest son, Changbin, could sense. The Northern Warrior shot a quick, thoughtful glance toward the Solar Guard, his expression mirroring the uncertainty that hung over them all.

   “My King, we must take the first step.” Commander Seo urged once again, his voice firm, as he had done for the better part of the last hour.

Since the Commander’s arrival, he had brought his brigade of warriors, with Changbin at his side. Their presence underscored the gravity of the situation, the urgency palpable in their every move.

   “We can’t attack first, Commander.” Captain Elliot countered, his tone sharp, as he stood firmly by the King’s side.

It was the same debate, unfolding in a weary loop. The Nightshade Commander had been urging for immediate action, while the King’s Solar Captain insisted on holding back, waiting for the situation to escalate just enough to justify their move. 

The King sighed, his gaze shifting toward Felix, who had entered the room not long ago, clearly waiting for his chance to speak.

   “Do you have something to report?” The King’s voice cut through the tension that hung thick between the Solar Captain and the Commander.

Felix cleared his throat, stepping further into the room, the weight of the moment settling on him.

   “The Prince’s Midnight band have received a sign from their leader. It’s been two days, but once the path cleared, they were able to identify the markings on the tallest tree.”

Silence fell over the room, every eye turning toward Felix, waiting for him to elaborate.

   “What was the sign?” King Bahng’s voice bellowed, deep and authoritative.

   “A circle. Eight tallies.”

The moment the words left Felix’s lips, the Commander’s expression darkened. His brows furrowed in immediate understanding, his displeasure clear as he processed the implications of the message. He let out a “tsk” of frustration.

   “We’ve received the Crown Prince’s orders.” King Bahng continued, his voice firm and steady. 

   “Remain defensive. Encircle the border with as many stealth warriors as possible. We’ve already lost two days.” He pointed toward Elliot before turning his gaze to Commander Seo.

   “We have five days, Seo. Are your warriors prepared for war?” The King asked, his sharp eyes fixed on the scar-littered face of the Commander, who responded with a smug smile.

   “Prepared? Of course. We Seos have always been the backbone of the Kingdom’s strongest army. We just await your orders, my King. Surely, we could get a head start and eliminate the enemy royals before—”

   “We cannot jeopardize the safety of Nightshade’s Crown Prince, Seo.” King Bahng interjected, cutting him off with a steely look.

   “War is not about bloodshed, as you well know. It’s about protecting our people. And right now, we have our people in enemy territory.”

The Commander lowered his head, inhaling deeply, finally relenting.

   “Yes, Your Majesty.”

────────────────────────

The Second Princess of Elysium stared at the vial of Nightshade poison on her desk, her mind a storm of thoughts.

It was a small thing, but its presence filled her with an unsettling weight. The plant had once gleamed a vivid green in the light of day, but now, under the dim glow of her bedroom, it seemed darker than ever. The two shriveled black berries rolled slowly within the vial, one having fallen off the stem during her journey back to the privacy of her chambers. Possibly when she had collided with the Warrior Prince.

She sighed, sinking deeper into her chair, her eyes still fixed on the deadly shrub she hadn’t intended to purchase in the first place.

After completing her tasks for the day, she had made up an excuse about needing to retire early, convincing Anna that she was simply exhausted when the young girl seemed concerned anew by her out-of-character actions. Though recently none of her actions seemed anything close to her usual behavior. 

But now she sat at her desk, the cold night air breezing through the crack of the balcony doors she had left open, in hopes the chill would ease the suffocating weight in her chest, and would calm the storm swirling in her mind. Overwhelmed by whatever she had learned today, by this vial in her possession.

She had jotted down notes, writing out symptoms of Fading Ill, scraps of information she could recall from the herbalist she’d spoken to that afternoon. 

His words had stuck with her. The ones about the poor suffering, while the royals celebrated. While she sat here enjoying the comforts of a cushioned life. Even if she was looked down on, it was nothing compared to what the slum dwellers were living in. It made her feel guilty, that same drive that had erupted within her the first time she had heard about this sickness, had returned with much more intensity. 

Her father was not going to do anything about it anytime soon it seemed.

At least not until after Ian’s wedding in a few days. 

Once again she thought back to the herbalist and his warnings about this poisonous plant, its uses.

To grind, to cook, to mix.

Her eyes widened as a thought struck her.

   “A poison that could also be used as a medicine…” She whispered to herself.

The Deadly Nightshade, a common poison, yet no one in Elysium knew much of its uses beyond death. 

Ironically, the Kingdom known for its herbalism and medical advancements, named after this very poison.

Y/N chewed her bottom lip, torn between curiosity and frustration. If only there were books on such things in the palace, instead of the endless shelves of useless histories and ceremonial records.

If only she could run to Chan about this. 

The Nightshade Prince would know far more about poisons than she ever could, she was sure of it.

   “Have you finally decided to poison someone?”

The deep voice shattered the silence of her bedchamber, making Y/N jump, a startled scream slipping from her lips as she whipped her head around to find the Nightshade Prince standing in the room, having entered through the same small crack in the door she had left open.

It seemed as if he too was thinking about her.

About whatever he had seen this afternoon. 

Her gaze snapped toward the grand doors at the far side of the room, where her knight stood guard. The knight who surely would have heard her scream.

Yet, there was no movement. No rush of footsteps. No knight bursting in to protect his princess from a potential threat.

   “He’s not here.” Chris finally spoke, and Y/N’s eyes flicked back to him. 

He was leaning casually against the balcony door, his gaze briefly scanning the glass tube of the toxic shrub on her desk before settling on her stunned expression.

   “I thought I would have had to render him unconscious once more…” He continued with a touch of disdain, his eyes narrowing. 

   “But it seems your knight had other plans. Not worthy of being called a knight.” The anger in his words was unmistakable.

Y/N took in his words, processing everything. Finally understanding that the other night, her slumped over guard had in fact not been in a deep slumber out in the corridors.

Yet as her eyes settled on him, she could only stare at his intense gaze that traced over her, suddenly making her stiffen. 

She watched him look back at her desk, at the plant he definitely recognized at just a mere glimpse. At least she had been right about him knowing much about such poisonous plants.

   “I purchased it out of mere curiosity.” She finally answered his question, composing herself after her initial shock.

He tilted his head, brows raising as he took in her lame excuse. 

   “Purchasing a poison out of curiosity…that’s a first.” He seemed amused slightly.

Then his eyes narrowed, staring into hers.

   “Do you intend to poison me?” His question lingered in the air.

One that made sense. The foreign prince had been guarded ever since his arrival, and seemed even more so after learning certain things it seemed.

Still, the question left her frowning, a sense of unease settling over her.

   “You’re a Nightshade healer aren’t you? Surely you must have certain levels of immunity to such poisons.” It was a guess, something that seemed to be true with the way his expression morphed, slightly impressed, but he didn't answer.

Possibly still guarded, still wary. She was a princess of Elysium after all.

An enemy princess. One who loved him, his presence here making her heart hammer against her chest.

   “What are you doing here Prince Christopher?” 

The air between the two of them had shifted almost instantly with her simple question, making the Warrior Prince stand straight, gulping back to soothe his suddenly dry throat.

He could have told her that he wanted to speak to her.

That he wanted to know more about what she meant the other night. Why did she have such a dangerous plant in her possession?

He could have asked why she was avoiding running into him, avoiding confrontation.

That he wanted to know more about why she knew of Sienna not being his childhood friend, one she supposedly didn’t know about.

Maybe it was another guess. Like she had just made about this poison. But he wanted to know.

He could have told her he missed her. 

There were so many thoughts that flitted through his mind, yet standing here, staring at her hardened expression he couldn’t utter any of them.

His silence seemed as frustrating to her as him, making the Second Princess drop her head as she sighed.

   “You too must take my rank lightly.”

Her statement bewildered him, his brows narrowing into a deep frown at the implications. Taking a step closer before faltering from his stuntedness. 

   “What nonsense—”

   “Then what else? You freely enter my bedroom as you please. Jeopardizing my reputation as a young maiden. Isn’t it because I’m the daughter of the King’s Mistress, because you think I’m lowly?”

The words had come out harshly, words that had pricked at her ever since her birthday banquet. Ever since he had laughed at the existence of the King’s illegitimate children.

She watched as his expression grew upset, her words poking him with slight anger. But Y/N continued, as if talking to him after what felt like forever, made her bare out all the things that he’s done to hurt her unintentionally, finally pouring out in her own harsh words.

   “Just because you’re a Crown Prince and honorary guest, does not mean you-you can disrespect me.” Her stern tone faltered with hurt, gaze dropping to the ground.

Chris inhaled deeply, finally understanding.

He had already learned long ago that the second princess who no one outside the King’s court knew the existence of, was in fact not a sheltered or guarded girl like the Nightshade Warriors had assumed. He’d long learned that she was looked down upon by the higher-ranked royals, by her own mother even. 

That she cried often, that she hurt often.

He had long felt protective over her even before truly understanding his feelings. 

Yet now he understood. Princess Y/N, who held her head high, deep down, was very insecure. 

The Nightshade Prince exhaled, taking another step into the bedroom.

   “I do not take you lightly, I could never take you lightly. Nor do I mean any disrespect.” Chris finally spoke, unsettling the silence that befell them, his words sincere.

   “I know it is rude of me to barge in here and risk your reputation, but I could not control myself—I…” Chris’ words faltered for a moment. “—I wanted to speak to you.”

He knew it was a stupid excuse. Such an insignificant reasoning for his damning presence here in the privacy of her bedroom. But it was nothing but the truth.

   “Speak to me…” She repeated, a small laugh, tinged with bitterness escaped her lips.

   “—And you thought sneaking into my palace was to do so?” She almost glared back at him.

Both her words and her expression slightly irked Christopher, as if she was purposefully trying to misunderstand him. Each sentence of hers, drawing out his frustrations.

   “You run from me the moment you catch a glimpse. How else am I supposed to speak to you?” His tone was almost incredulous. 

She wasn’t surprised he had noticed, she didn’t really attempt to hide it either. Hoping her distant behavior would make him look at her badly.

   “Why do you think I run Prince Christopher?” She spat, her voice sharp.

   “You said the other night ‘didn’t happen’, yet you’re the one who seems to be reliving it every time you see me. It shouldn’t have happened. At least not like that. But can you not lie to both of us and accept the fact that you had wanted it as much as I…” His tone had softened, his awaiting eyes, twinged with frustration, with desperation.

Reminding her of the same look he had given her in the rain. 

A look that makes her stiffen, her hands clutching at the fabric of her nightgown.

   “I did not want that kiss.” She answered, her words cold almost.

A coldness that spread into the air between them, making the foreign prince stare at her with a slight surprise.

Yet it didn’t last long. His gaze darkened, slightly upset.

   “But you did not stop. You pulled me closer. You kissed me back.” His tone was slightly defensive, slightly something else.

Hurt.

It was time it seemed. To hurt him further. To put up that act that she had convinced herself into, determined to make him lose all interest in her.

To make him hate her.

To keep him safe.

   “What do you want me to say?” She asked, the venom in her words flowing freely.

   “That it was amazing, that I was desperate to kiss you? Well, that would be a lie. I hated it. It disgusted me. T-to kiss you— “ Each word felt like a prick, dripping with disdain.

The Princess watched, her hands balling as tightly as they could against her sides, holding back the tears that threatened to betray her and fall easily. But she continued.

   “—You, who kissed me like some predator.”

Chris could only stare, eyes raking over her suddenly distant figure. Her harsh words stung, each one a sharp stab against his chest. 

But what hurt more, perhaps, was the gaze. 

Even through the disgust that flashed across her face, the gaze remained, piercing him with an honesty he couldn’t ignore. It was the same gaze he had learned to recognize, the one she wore when she lied. That subtle, almost imperceptible shift in her eyes.

It was the same gaze he had seen in the rainy garden, when she had pressed him to leave but couldn’t bring herself to let go. It spoke volumes in the silence between them.

Prince Christopher dropped his head, masking the hurt that flashed across his face with a small laugh, his eyes returning back to glare into hers, gaze sharp and intense.

   “A predator?” He repeated, his voice dropping low, a tone that has her flinching slightly, yet not enough for him to catch.

   “Aren’t you? Your presence here is proof of it. Like a nightly beast you are so proud to be compared to.”

She knew it was low of her to spew such utter nonsense, knowing they weren’t even close to her true thoughts.

Knowing well enough that they would hurt him. Perhaps enough for him to look at her with disgust-laced eyes, like she had been pretending to do so.

The Warrior Prince’s jaw tightened at her words. His eyes trailing over her tense form. Her arms that had slowly crossed over her chest almost defensively as he stared.

   “So you’re showing your true colors then?” He muttered bitterly,  watching her stay silent, her eyes refusing to meet his.

   “Are you saying you’re just like them all? The nobles, the royals of Elysium, who are afraid of us? Who looks down on us?” 

The silence that followed was suffocating, thick with tension.

Y/N’s grip on her arms tightened as she struggled to control her emotions.

   “I am a Princess of Elysium—An enemy princess. And—” Her voice faltered, his sharp eyes boring into hers, making her inhale silently.

   “And you terrify me Prince Christopher.”

The lies spilled into the silence that settled, his brows relaxing as he took in her words, processing. His eyes darted between hers hoping to find that they were false. Yet that glint he had seen earlier lingered no more. 

And he realized that she had been telling the truth.

That she was scared of him.

His lingering gazes, his touches. His presence here all seemed to terrify her.

Allowing herself to fall for him like he had her, terrified her.

A heaviness settled over him.

He had left behind the tensions within Ruby Hall, the defensive stance he was suddenly in. He had left behind the anxious thoughts that coursed through him upon realizing that he didn’t have his childhood friend here. 

He had pushed it all back to sneak around here, to climb into her chambers like a true beast.

Like a true mad man, in attempts to get her to look him in the eye. So he could apologize for his actions that night. So he could speak to her.

To explain to her about the crystal bird.

To hold her.

To kiss the second princess who undeniably attracted him even if he resisted. Although a part of him had been aware that he had perhaps been drawn to her from the moment they had exchanged words.

Perhaps the moment she had caught him loitering outside the Queen’s corridors, her gaze piercing even behind the veil that covered her face. His curiosity piqued.

But here she was now. The walls she had built around herself were not easily torn down. Instead, suddenly revealing a side of her that she had supposedly hidden throughout his entire stay.

Chris doesn’t believe it. That the girl who had advised him to be confident about himself, his nation, asserting his power, in front of these Elysium nobles, now claimed it was all a farce.

The girl who opened his eyes to what he could now understand as true love. The one who had made him question his feelings for his childhood friend, someone he thought he loved in some way, only to realize it was her he had fallen for, now claimed he disgusted her.

That she was terrified of him.

Claimed that he was truly a beast of the night. Sneaking into her bedroom, into the garden that night to lay his filthy hands on her.

Her lips, her actions, her words scream “Hate me. Like I hate you.” But her gaze spoke of something else entirely.

A desperation perhaps? A flicker of something he had seen before, amidst the downpour. Amidst the turmoil that churned between them.

From the outside it would have made sense. They weren't close, let alone be anything near friends. 

He knew the way she interacted with Hyunjin, saw first-hand how she spoke with him. How friends with one another spoke. Her form relaxed, her lips thinned into soft smiles.

Her giggles. 

The sound of which he had heard once that afternoon with the gathering of royal children. Yet, that sound seemed to haunt him, flitting through his thoughts whenever they felt like it.

But now he could only stare, his intent gaze boring into her. Her chest heaving from her anger, her frustrations that seem to spill out so easily in front of only him.

   “Do you truly wish for me to hate you then?”

The words hung in the air, a heavy silence falling between them as they settled. He watched her eyes widen slightly as she processed them.

He wasn’t sure why he had asked.

Part of him hoped she would shake her head, saying “no.”

Part of him hoped she would embrace him, her arms tightening around him just as they had that night. Her lips pressing against his.

But she does none of that. Her form stiffened, gaze locking with his, unwavering.

   “I do.”

Prince Christopher inhaled sharply, his eyes dropping to the ground for a moment before he took a step back, his posture stiff, his movements almost courteous.

A grim silence fell between them before he finally spoke.

   “Very well, Second Princess Y/N.”

His tone was cold. ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ to be continued.

── ask to be tagged! - @stayceebs97, @palindrome969, @tsunderelino, @solandiszale, @fixation-dump, @ellelabelle, @gaslasyttune, @qwonyoung23, @minh0scat, @candyquokka, @sellomaybe, @kat-unzel, @aeri-skzver, @hefflez8, @lenfilms, @staytinyluv, @ovulatingrn, @vxllxnsworld, @yoongiismylove2018, @farhas-stuff, @staysweird, @gujter, @moledroangel, @spectraly, @luminouskalopsia (please ask to be tagged if you’re genuinely interested!)

[hipsdofangirl]

poltergiest! wonwoo x f!reader

summary: after an accident that occurred, your friend decides to move you both into a new apartment for closure; however, it was unknown that the apartment was actually the site of a brutal murder.

genre: ghost au!, slight joshua x reader, joshua is a menace but for good-ish reasons, wonwoo is manipulative but doesn’t know love, swearing, violence, lowercase intended

SMUT AHEAD! contents include: semi-hate sex, wonwoo and you love titties, subtle corruption kink, voyeur but not much

first time writing smut please be nice lol

wc: 6.1k

not proofread

18+ ONLY, BE WARNED

the doorknob was too rusty for your liking.

“you don’t like it?” your friend, joshua asks.

you blink, snapping briefly out of your stupor. you dart your attention to him, seeing a slight smirk on his face before it fades behind his own smiling eyes.

you glance away out of embarrassment of being caught. “no. it’s very…” your eyes trail back to the bronze number plaque representing the apartment; you can pinpoint specks of paint ready to be flicked off. “unique i have to say!”

joshua lets out a breathy chuckle. “good. cause this place is one we are going to be staying at for a while.” he reaches into his dress-pant’s pocket as you register his words.

“for a while?” you subtly gasp, “aren’t you like rich-rich?” you turn to him and clasp your hands together in a pleading manner, “i swear i’ll pay you back for whatever costs just don’t make me go in…there!” you point at the door.

joshua jingles the keys in his pocket before fishing them out to dangle sardonically in front of your face.

“weren’t you the one to tell me that i should understand how…” he waves his hand with the key, jingling them in a way you could only describe as pompous, “everyday people live.”

his attitude causes you to back down.

his gloved hand positions the key into the slot and turns it, eliciting a sharp click. you take one last glance over the edge of the second story railing, the rapid wind cooling your nervous body.

joshua makes a sound of disgust as he wipes his black glove against his pants, wiping off the dusty iron; as he saunters in the apartment, you hesitantly follow, still admiring the sunset.

he flicks on the light switch in the hallway and you both observe the singular stutter of the—surprisingly—white LED light.

he puts his hand on his hip. “welcome to our new abode.” you grimace at the way he is taking this all in. he strolls over to the kitchen island, setting down the keys before looking over at you with scrutinizing eyes.

at the same time, you sheepishly tip-toe your way over to him like a magnet; your eyes scan the area of a mesh between the living room and kitchen. you lean your body further to notice a hallway that leads to bedrooms.

you glance back over to your friend, ready for the next instructions, but his attention is focused somewhere else; you follow his gaze to a bookshelf.

you snigger at him, “you read books?”

his attention snaps back to you—you notice his facade dwindle little by little with every snarky remark you make—and then he smirks back at you.

“with the way you jest, you believe you know a lot,” he barely whispers.

you feel tingles bubble in uncomfortable places. you bite your lip and downcast your eyes, somewhat apologizing with your body.

joshua’s tense demeanor relaxes a bit, you sense him giving off a comforting aura, as if he is trying to soothe you in someway. he waves over to the shelf. “i just noticed that a book fell, probably from how hard you slammed the door.”

you whip around to see the door is shut and groan, “agh, i’m sorry about that.”

joshua steps over to your side, close enough to take in his body heat, “things are too much and going by so fast—i get it. don’t worry about it too much.” he smiles. “now i’m going to grab our things so you can go around and explore.”

you nod your head, observing the man causally walking down the hall and opening the door to the outside world. it shuts dramatically once again. your body feels caged more than ever.

“i don’t even know if you can understand it…” you whisper to the air.

the air whispers back, “that man will never understand as much as he claims to…”

you twist your head around, scanning for…nothing.

you immediately scamper. ignoring the book that is lying by your feet, you jump over it and speed-walk to the front door. you attempt to reason yourself out of it.

‘ghosts? no—no…not ghosts. i mean even if there was a ghost i doubt he knows i know, so i’ll casually walk out and sneak by joshua and book it down the street and return to living my normal life before that wack job entered it.’

you clasp the doorknob. it wouldn’t budge. you wiggle it till you see the part where there is no door and only a knob.

‘oh shit there really is a ghost here.’

you slowly turn your head back to see the keys still sitting on the island.

‘okay so there is only one lock and it’s from the inside and for the love of the absolute whatever is the door not budging?’

the door opens and you shriek.

on the other side, joshua stares at you with wide confused eyes.

he tilts his chin down. “is everything okay?“

your hands—that spontaneously covered your mouth at that instance—retract. you swallow and shake your head.

“no! it’s not okay!” your hands clutch your pants. you begin to whisper and glance around to your sides. “i think this place is haunted.”

joshua snorts and eyes you up and down. “haunted?”

“mhm!”

he covers his mouth with his right hand and chuckles.

you stomp your foot on the ground like a child. “i’m serious!”

he raises that same hand in the air as if he is surrendering. “okay! i would believe you,” your brows furrow, “if you had proof.”

you raise an eyebrow at him. “josh, look at the apartment we are at right now,” your teeth begin to clatter against each other, “and ghosts are somehow out of the question?”

“i never said ghosts weren’t real, but you haven’t even been in the apartment for 10 minutes. a ghost wouldn’t immediately make its presence known.” he consoles.

you flick your wrist in confusion. “isn’t a ghost’s whole objective to get people to leave its sacred space? wouldn’t i be better if they jumped the gun?”

joshua taps his chin. “not always—those are normally known as poltergeists.”

you cross your arms, rubbing your hands against your skin to soothe the bumps that arose during your conversation. “like from paranormal activity?”

joshua squints his eyes and puts his hand on the suitcase handle. “the main antagonist was a demon—not a poltergeist.” he begins to walk inside, squeezing past you through the doorframe. you hear him mutter, “that’s the reference she makes? and not name the actual movie poltergeist?”

you scoff, “isn’t that an old movie?”

“a very well known movie,” he sighs, wheeling the suitcase and stopping it next to the couch. joshua prances over to the bookshelf that caught his attention earlier and picks up the book that fell. he flips over the book to the cover and reads it before placing it under his armpit.

joshua comes back over and rests himself on the armrest on the pre-furnished couch.

“no matter what the movie displays, poltergeists are the main type of spiritual entity able to manipulate the physical world.”

you tilt your head. “i thought any type of ‘spiritual entities’ could?”

joshua grins. “that’s what hollywood wants you to think. the low-level spectrum of ‘ghosts’ are officially labeled as ‘wanderers’—“

you snap your fingers. “like those in limbo!”

joshua’s grin fades into a solemn smile. “those who cannot move on.” his eyes then darken. “poltergeists are those who will themselves not to move on. all they need is a push in the right direction.”

it’s weird seeing joshua this intense. however, it doesn’t last long when he clasps his hands and his smile that joins his eyes return.

“enough with that exposition of spooky stuff—i’ll turn on a show for you to watch while i take care of our things.”

you groan. “you don’t have to keep doing everything; i feel bad that you are basically taking care of me.”

joshua pats the couch cushion, welcoming you to trudge over and plop on a seat. “after all you have been through, you need time to recover. i’m here to help with that.” he bends over to the coffee table in front of you both and turns on the tv.

you notice his glances when he flicks through the channels. “i don’t care what we watch, i’m fine with the harry potter movies they show every weekend.”

joshua laughs. “alright then, princess.”

your face flushes and you sink further into the couch.

he sets down the remote back on the table and wipes off metaphorical dust.

before he fully enters the hallway leading to the bedrooms, he turns back to you.

“you don’t mind sleeping on the couch do you?”

your face drops.

joshua winces in return. “it’s a pullout couch. i would give you the bedroom but a man needs his…”

you shut your eyes. “oh god—yes just take it.”

strolling down the hall, joshua sighs in relief. “thank you!”

you hear the door shut, then another click, then you are alone.

the LED light flickers off.

‘oh goddamnit.’

you glance at the still working tv screen. ‘it doesn’t help that harry potter is currently in the dark woods.’

“princess, huh. you are really going to let him worm his way through you like that?”

your eyes practically bulge out of your head. you whip your head to the source of the noise—toward the bookshelf.

a—rather handsome—man stands there, licking his thumb before turning it to the next page of a book. the man doesn’t look at you, but you feel obligated to respond. his aura compels you not to look at him for too long. instead, you take interest in the book he is flicking through: The Return of Sherlock Holmes.

“or did he reduce you to a blubbering mess with just petty words?” his baritone voice ponders.

you clear your throat, willing yourself to meet his face. “no, no he didn’t. he is just a nice guy.” you internally gag by how lame you sound.

your attention then snaps back to the book he is reading. you sputter, “wait! you’re holding the book!” you stand up and pace over to him, “does that mean you’re a poltergeist?” you ask dumbly.

the man is taken aback, by your bluntness and impulsiveness to approach him. his shoulders relax soon after as he dons a small smirk on his face. “cute.”

you pause, wondering how hot your cheeks could burn.

he retracts the book and places it on the shelf shoulder length to you, displaying the title. “you just got here, didn’t you?”

reminding you of your current situation, your shoulders droop, eyes falling to the floor. “unfortunately.”

the man latches onto your mood swing. “why so sad about it? is this place not to your liking?”

you glance back to—for once—meet his gaze but you cannot will yourself to be in there for too long. “uhm—it’s just not my style.”

the man hums and looks around. “is it too old for you? i can change it to your liking?”

your hands wave in front of you before you even realize. “no no! it’s fine—“

“you weren’t here by choice were you?”

your hands stop their frantic movements and slowly clasp into light fists. “yeah…”

the man shrugs his shoulders. “it’s not so bad here.” he then strides past you, brushing against your shoulder. you turn to observe him, seeing him walk over to the island to pick up the set of keys joshua left there. “this yours?”

you confusingly nod at him. “i guess so.”

he huffs. “you aren’t very sure of yourself are you?” he seems to mutter something under his breath, “that can be changed.” he takes one key off and sets the rest of the key ring back on island.

the man fiddles with the singular key and quietly whistles, scanning around the cabinets and other shelves. he then tosses the key before snatching it through the air, pacing back to the bookshelf.

he lifts the book he previously was reading and places the keys behind there.

he meets your confused state. “it’s our secret,” he whispers, placing his finger on your lips as a ‘shush’ notion. “isn’t that right?”

your chin trembles. “yeah, sure.”

he grins. “good girl.” he brushes past you once again.

you try to reach out to him, but he was never there.

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

ever since the accident, you couldn’t sleep; flashes of pain and suffering kept you awake. the days felt like minutes while the night felt like years.

joshua mostly kept you company during the day, but sometimes he would leave, instructing you not to go anywhere for your well-being. at night, he was locked up in the bedroom, doing whatever he does, leaving you alone once again.

however, you weren’t alone for too long. as the friendly-poltergeist, you dubbed mr. beanie (after you caught him trying joshua’s on in the hallway), kept you company.

“and that’s how i was able to take a photo of her cheating on her boyfriend!” you end your story time.

mr. beanie only sat there, entranced by your storytelling, as the clock rolled onto 2 am.

he adjusts his linked hands in his lap. “was the boyfriend a friend of yours? or do you just like to see justice handed out?”

you rest your head on the back couch cushion. “ding ding ding! he was one of my friends—poor chan. i wonder how he is doing nowadays.”

“and was he loyal?” beanie asks.

you sit up straight. “he better have been or i will kick his ass! making me do all that for nothing,” you pout.

beanie scoots an inch closer to you, releasing his clasped fingers to put his hand on the cushion behind you. “did you love him?”

you sputter, “love? oh god no he is just a friend!”

he tilts his head and shrugs his shoulders, eyes glancing upwards.

the silence agitates you further after that question. “the last time i was in love it was a shit-show.”

the brown haired man raises an eyebrow; you crack your neck—a nervous tick responding to the intense stare you suddenly received.

you continue, fingers gripping your pants tightly, “we were fine as all couples were—for the honeymoon phase—but,” you whistle. you feel him place a hand and methodically tap your back as a form of comfort. “his habits got worse. i thought when getting into the relationship, i could change him.”

beanie nods. “what habits?” he sits up. “did he hurt you?”

your hand unfurls. “uhm…no? i-i don’t think so at least. he never laid his hands on me but some of the things he said to me weren’t…boyfriend-like?”

the methodical tapping meshes with your heartbeat.

“and the real tipping point is when…” you pause again, his palm lays flat on your spine. “i had to go to the hospital.” your hands tremble. you wave your hands trying to explain and contain your emotions. the oven light flickers. “i just remember blacking out and then waking up in the hospital.” you blow air through your nose dumbly. “and he never visited. i even looked at the visitor list for me and…no sign of his name.”

“…and how did you meet,” his eyes glance up to the hallway, “this man?”

you blink rapidly. “what is your problem with him?”

his eyes glaze over for a second. “i don’t trust men like that.” you then notice how close he has inched to you. “doesn’t it make you angry?”

you whisper, dumbfounded by the tense change in conversation, “angry?”

he hums. “this man you moved in with has some similar qualities to the boyfriend you described.”

“what? no he doesn’t!” you exclaim.

he leers further in your full eyes. “he brought you here out of your own free will, he doesn’t pay attention to you, and won’t answer any of your questions fully.”

you try to interject but he continues.

“the day you first moved in here, you explained your fear and he did nothing. in fact, you are here,” he gestures to you both sitting on the couch, “talking to the most dangerous entity in the radius—well besides other humans.” he leans closer to you, you could only imagine his breath fanning your lashes. “if someone tries to interrupt our peace, i’ll protect you.”

footsteps pad toward your direction. your eyes widen as you stare at your ghostly friend. he doesn’t seem too shocked, however, as he just turns his attention to the incoming sounds.

“(name)?” joshua rubs his eyes. “what are you still doing up?”

you hear the man beside you scoff; you send off a little glare to him before replying, “as always, i couldn’t sleep.” you pause, taking in his work attire, “what are you still doing up—in your work clothes no less?"

joshua dryly chuckles. "just got caught up with work."

your fingers dig into your pants—uncomfortable with his presence. “ahh. how fun…” you try to sneak a glance toward the being beside you only to see an empty spot.

a blade from the ceiling fan pierces the wall beside joshua’s head.

“holy shit!” you stand up, stumbling towards the man who continued to rub his eyes sleepily. you don’t notice joshua’s eyes scanning the area.

your hand reaches out hesitatingly, but you pull it away, back to your chest.

joshua notices and furrows his brows. “what have you been up to during these nights?”

your hand grips your wandering hand’s wrist. “nothing important!” you notice the ghostly figure stand in the doorframe to joshua’s bedroom, but he doesn’t walk in. joshua follows your gaze and then turns back with a roll of his eyes. “i’ve been recovering!” you nod to support your point.

joshua sighs and rubs his forehead. “recovering as in talking things out?” you pout and begin to study the hardwood floor. “talking doesn’t really prove much compared to actions. maybe start, reading a book or doing something to actually move on,” he snips.

your eyes flash back to him. “doing something? like what? go for a walk? i would if you actually let me out of the house—i’m not a damn house cat! i can’t even go into your room. you even take most of the damn books!”

joshua’s chin twitches in annoyance. he sharply exhales. “it’s for your own good.”

he turns away from you, marching back to his room. the man is still at the doorway, seeming to try and peek in, but joshua wipes the air, distorting the spiritual being’s presence.

the man vanishes completely.

the fan blade sits there in its spot, like a little form of mockery.

“go read a book,” you mimic, “i’m not a fucking kid.”

yet, still following his words, you toddle to the bookshelf. with a downcast gaze, out of anger, you stop yourself before you could kick the book on the ground.

you recognize it. the same book the man was reading when he showed his presence: The Return of Sherlock Holmes. next to the fallen book, newspaper clippings are lying haphazardly. you should have seen the title coming.

HAVE YOU SEEN THIS MAN?

yes, you have.

crouching on the floor, you mentally slap yourself for remembering that you have been fancying yourself up next to a goddamn poltergeist: beings that only remain to wreck havoc.

you scan the paragraph on the side next to the picture before reading the section toward the bottom.

‘Jeon Wonwoo was reported missing around the end of the holiday season. He was last seen enjoying the festivities downtown on North St. with friends, Kim Mingyu and ——.’

you couldn’t even decipher the latter’s name.

“we both have had our fair share of bad romance.” the man—wonwoo’s—voice hits you upside the head like a brick. you tense up, wiping your sweaty palms against your pants.

you swallow. you feel his presence rubbing against your spine. “she killed me.”

you snap your head back to face him; he isn’t looking at you.

he continues, “we have been dating for around 6 months. mingyu was too naive to see it as he slowly fell in love with her. couldn’t blame him though, she knew how to do her job well….” he pauses, enacting eye contact with you. it’s not anything dark like you’ve seen before. “well i guess that’s how i also took pity on you; you remind me of him.”

you will yourself to speak, “what happened?”

he sighs, eyes darkening once again. “she convinced me to drink while we were out; i trusted her. she even bought me a book as a treat. then, she took me back to her apartment—here—to the bedroom where we were beginning to fuck.”

you blush out of embarrassment.

“but then she pulled a knife out on me. i tried to fight and was beginning to overpower her, but this wasn’t her first time. she slipped something in my drink, causing me to be sloppy and weak.” he spits.

“that’s why you’re still here…” you ponder.

he nods. “i’ve been waiting in this apartment for her return, so i can get revenge. i’ve been gaining energy from the inhabitants here—“

“killing them—?” you vocalize in horror.

he pouts mockingly at you. “is that so wrong? you hinted at it yourself, the people that come here aren’t good. i’m just doing the world a favor.”

you inch your way to separate yourself from him.

he snaps his gaze onto your form. “don’t you wish you could do the same? as much as we are trapped here, we are free.”

you shake your head. “no..no…”

he grabs the back of your head and mashes your faces together.

his tongue enters your mouth unexpectedly. your eyes shut, unable to do anything else out of confusion, slight fear, and some fucked up kind of attraction.

you barely register his claim over pockets of your mouth till he forces your separation. you breath heavily. he chuckles at your response.

“you know she is never coming back, so just think of me,” you state, out of breath, eyeing the sherlock holmes book.

he whispers, “you don’t know that…you don’t know anything.” all the lights in the apartment flash on and off like a bolt of lightning.

‘fuck it.’

“i know it,” you reply cockily, “cause i’ll be all you’re thinking about.”

wonwoo freezes with wide eyes that could see the whites.

this time, you snatch the back of his head, gripping roots of his hair, and bring him closer to you.

your sets of teeth click for a second as your tongue overpowers him. with another pull of his hair, wonwoo groans, rumbles fluttering through his chest. his hands slide down from your shoulders to your waist. he gives one squeeze to your hips, eliciting a squeak from you.

his tongue wraps around yours as you try to pull back for air out of habit. only a small gasp cries out from your lips before he messily mushes you both closer.

you tap his head with your two fingers, causing him to instantly pull away, searching for any discomfort on your face.

you heave, “can we do it somewhere comfortable?” your knee rubs against the newspaper clipping. wonwoo hears this noise and glances down.

he quickly meets your gaze again. “c’mere darling.” he picks you up, fingers squeezing your thighs. he struts over to the couch and tosses you in there gently; you laugh in surprise.

he trots back to your previous spot and picks up the newspaper clipping with a firm grip. you couldn’t help but recognize and understand the prominence of his veiny hands.

he crawls on top of you and tucks the paper under you; all in one motion, he tugs your shirt upwards. he stops at your upper midsection, you feel him snap off your bra and pull both articles of clothing off.

he whistles and gapes at your plump tits.

the room gets warmer and you attempt to curl your arms around yourself.

wonwoo’s gaze hardens. “none of that.” he grips both of your wrists and pries them apart, mocking some weak strength, “didn’t you say to focus on you? so let me see it.”

the ceiling fan swirls faster. lights turn on and off in your vision; you don’t know if it’s from him (in more than one way) or if it’s the leftover blades obscuring the light.

he clasps his cold hands around both of your tits and kneads them sensually. he flips his right hand over to slot your nipple between his fingers. he pulls them up slowly and gauges your reaction before pinching it, drawing out a gasp from your lips.

before you could recover, he continues to tease that one and latches his mouth over your other one, suckling it.

your hands—after having no where to go—latch onto the sides of the couch.

wonwoo releases his wet mouth and the warm air fans over you, perking your nipples up taller. he snatches both of your lingering hands and positions them back on his head.

you smirk. “so you have a hair pulling kink, huh?”

he pushes his knee further between your legs. “just need you to hold onto something before you break.”

your smirk fades as you lean your head back. you tug the strands of his hair as he goes down on your chest once again. instead of giving too much attention to your tits, he smothers kisses between the crevice before turning to one mound and sucking—hard.

you cry out. you could feel a smirk twitch against his lips before he gives it one feather kiss.

his hands creep from the sides of your shoulders to rest by your head on the cushion, supporting his weight. his knee pushes further.

at the same time, his kisses travel up to the crook of your neck. he lightly peppers any skin in his way. he bites down spontaneously.

you moan obscenely you didn’t even know you could muster.

“that’s a new one,” wonwoo lowly comments.

while he tickles your neck, one of his hands travel down, fiddling with the button holding you together. he snaps them apart at the same time he suckles a specific part of your neck.

his cold hand then taps his way on top of your underwear before sliding down the top to your clit.

the temperature cause you to shudder and bury your face into wonwoo’s cheek.

two of his fingers enter suddenly.

you gasp, “already?”

wonwoo tugs your ear lobe with his teeth. “we don’t have much time together.”

your moist hole sucks him up as if you are twisting a wet towel.

he bellows a guttural groan. the sensation vibrates your ear drums, loosening your hands to rest onto his upper back.

his thick fingers spread and kiss every section they can access.

“darling,” he huffs, “you’re so tight, even just around my fingers. are you sure you aren’t a succubus?”

the fact they are real doesn’t interrupt your current scenario.

he inserts a third one. you pray you don’t combust then and there. you bite your lip.

“just give it to me,” he mutters.

you do with a foul moan.

wonwoo slaps his hand over your mouth swiftly. “shhh. don’t want one of god’s holy messengers to hear us, do we?”

still undergoing first high, you shake your head rapidly, not processing what he said.

he sighs dramatically. pulling out his fingers, that seem to covered with liquid. he swipes those fingers under your chin, barely out of reach from your tongue.

he erects back up to a kneeling position on top of you, pulling your pants and underwear down to your ankles before ripping them off.

“you ready, darling?” he asks, taking off his shirt with bulging muscles.

you nod dumbly.

he leans back on top of you and taps your cheek. “words?”

you blink. “yeah! yeah… i’m good.”

a glimmer shines through his eyes. “good. just tap my cheeks if anything goes wrong.” he places one soft lingering kiss on your lips.

you whine for more and try to meet him again but your interrupted by your own sounds. your fingers dig into his shoulder blades.

wonwoo rumbles under his breath, “the supernatural shouldn’t be a stretch when this magnificent pussy can still be this tight somehow.”

you didn’t notice his one hand is interlocked with yours, his fingers gripping the slits as he slowly inserts himself.

you huff and hear rustling of paper. you peer down and bite your lip to see wonwoo placing the newspaper clipping under you both.

‘if this is the closure he needs then i guess it’s fine—‘

he whistles again—a habit you assume—and grips his hand next to your head. he begins to thrust slowly with a low grunt. in and out. each time he languidly pushes in to its extent, you feel him reach corners that have you seeing stars.

the slow beginner pace also slows down your mind as your lone hand scratches his shoulder blade. it slowly trails its way down, bouncing back up when wonwoo’s dick reaches your soul.

with light cold fingertips, your nails gently pluck one of his nipples on his sagging yet firm pecs. you whole palm then smushes it, squeezing it in rhythm during one of wonwoo’s thrust. he tilts his head forward, resting his forehead on your collarbone.

your hand continues its journey downward. before you can even fathom the size of his abs he roughly thrusts in and out, causing you to grab onto his sides abruptly. your thumb fiddles with the muscles as wonwoo’s pace ramps up to reach his high.

he grunts. “tell me you’re about to come. come for me, pretty.”

you nod, tears forming from the corner of your eyes, “i will—i’m going to—i’m so close wonwoo—please!”

he couldn’t resist your pleading, dumping his load into you. he gauges your current state: eyes shut and hands tightening around anything they touch. you still haven’t came.

even after his energy has spent, wonwoo returns to speeding up to match you up to his speed.

you come for a second time with a loud moan; wonwoo doesn’t cover it up.

you inhale and exhale so loudly you could barely hear your heart beating.

wait. its not your heart.

you turn to the side to see joshua sitting in a side chair in the living room, clapping with a hard on.

“thank you for the show, you two,” joshua comments slyly, “do you both feel better now?”

you blink and feel warmer out of embarrassment of being caught.

“josh—what the fuck—wait…” it clicks within your head.

you promptly try jerking yourself out of wonwoo’s grasp as he moans softly. you ignore the pleasure of leaving him but whimper in the loss of intimate contact. the newspaper now dripping in goo sticks to the couch.

you breathe heavily. “how the fuck can you see him?”

joshua blinks innocently. “do you feel better?”

you tuck in your chin to your chest and cover your private parts out of frustration. “yes, i do? i mean what girl wouldn’t like some dick—“

“i don’t care about what sensations you think you perceive,” joshua interrupts, “what do you want to do now?”

you scoff, tears wetting the corners of your eyes for a different reason, “i want to get away from you—both of you—you goddamn manipulators!”

joshua smirks and glances over at wonwoo with a victorious smile. he claps his hands one last time. “perfect! where are your keys?”

you sputter, angry at the whirlwind of questions, “oh, so i can get out of here now?”

joshua stands up. “of course you can, or you can choose to stay here with wonwoo, but i highly do not recommend.” joshua laughs proudly. “i don’t even know if wonwoo will stay here anymore after this.”

you turn to see wonwoo glaring at joshua.

‘oh…’

“i’m dead, aren’t i?” you answer yourself.

joshua solemnly nods. “yes…you had a stroke and died as soon as you entered the hospital. the only thing you had on you was your apartment key…”

you finish his statement, “the object that tethers me here.”

joshua places his hands in front of him—covering his consequences. “the reason you couldn’t leave this place was because you couldn’t be more than a certain feet away from your desired object. or, you would feel a pull that brings you back to them.”

you laugh, defeated, leaning back into the couch, pelvis aching.

‘what a way to do aftercare..’

joshua waits for you. “only till after you have relieved yourself,” he sniggers before composting himself with a cough, “can you leave limbo and move on.”

you stare blankly at the ceiling.

wonwoo asks the question you were just thinking, “why here and what do i have to do with it?”

joshua rubs the back of his neck. “well originally, as a medium, i was assigned to deal with your case, wonwoo, before the sentinels arrive. you’ve been racking up a kill count at the same time i got newly assigned to your case, (name).”

joshua begins to pace back and forth you two, continuing his exposition. “you both had similar issues and i thought—“

“that you might as well kill two birds with one stone. aka you let me try and help us,” you gesture at you and wonwoo, “to get over our issues.”

wonwoo leans back on the couch as well. “so you didn’t have to do any of the work.”

joshua slaps his hands on his sides. “when you say it like that it makes me sound like the bad guy.”

you and wonwoo don’t say anything.

joshua huffs and crosses his arms. “i was trying to help you before you both got killed. so a thank you for bringing you two together would be nice.”

“who says we are leaving?” wonwoo questions. joshua and you turn to him in puzzlement. “maybe i haven’t gotten over my baggage and i turned,” he points a thumb at you, “(name), into a poltergeist.”

you slam your hand on the couch. “wait so that was your plan?”

wonwoo shrugs in nonchalance but a hint of discomfort soaks his aura. it tastes weird on your tongue.

you stand up, not caring about your exposure. “yeah okay i’m out and i’m ready to move on and be reborn or whatever happens.”

you march over to the bookshelf and reach for the keys wonwoo hid on the first day. you turn back around to hand them to joshua but notice wonwoo’s downcast gaze.

you point to the book on the floor to signal to josh and walk back over to the couch in front of wonwoo.

you exhale, then realize that you have been breathing the whole time out of habit. “look, wonwoo,” he doesn’t move his head but meets your gaze. “it’s your choice if you decide to move on but. i’m telling you that staying here would be an even more waste of your time.”

you take a pause before continuing, observing wonwoo slightly relax as you talk. “you technically got your revenge as we did fuck on top of your ex girlfriend.”

“it’s not enough,” he growls.

you scoff. “as much power as you think you have, she probably wants this. for you to think about her all the time and consume your every thought—she feeds off of it. don’t give her that satisfaction.”

you pause one last time, gathering your final thoughts. “i know i’m not much and we just met and we just had sex, but. i wouldn’t mind if you joined me to a new life—a new start—for both of us to live how we wanted to.”

wonwoo lowers his hand that was holding his head and stares at you blankly.

you nod awkwardly. “so uhm. thank you—i guess?”

you turn to joshua and pass him your keys. “wait i’m not a poltergeist cause i could hold those right?”

joshua laughs. “no, you’re not. these are what tie you here so of course you can have a strong emotional attachment to make it physical.”

you pat yourself on the back for not giving in too much. “okay! okay…” you meet joshua’s find gaze as he clasps the keys. “i guess i should thank you too—as much as you were a voyuer-ous dick.”

joshua smirks. “i’ll take that. and thank you for trying to convince him instead of following him.”

you wave and shrug your shoulders. “since this is the last moments of my soul being here then i want to make them lawfully impressionable.”

you feel your insides—your soul—becoming lighter; the sensation of being on a rollercoaster and going down the big drop, filling your excitement along with anxiety.

bubbles then fill the air. you stare at them fondly before popping one, experiencing content after everything that has happened.

joshua holds your key above a purple candle. “may you rest in peace.”

tags: @jcxbliss

a/n: that’s the end!! ahhh i spent so long this weekend writing it out of the blue def my longest fic. i just wanted to write a ghost fic cause i saw a prompt of sadistic ghost x empathetic ghost; i was like ‘man i haven’t written about wonwoo, he could work here’ cause i wanted to do jeonghan but that’s favoritism.

as stated before, i’ve never written smut just read it so please don’t judge it too hard. mainly it’s included to add more to wonwoo/reader’s relationship this make it an actual ‘xreader’

i tried to make it hinted at throughout the story that reader was a ghost since she never could touch anything or enter joshua’s room (since it was sealed up via magic). also the light flickering and other stuff happened cause wonwoo was trying to influence her to kill josh but she unknowingly was able to move on because of that. if it wasn’t too apparent, at the beginning, reader was very indecisive and skeptical about everything including her past relationships; when she interacted with wonwoo, she slowly became decisive and at the end knew what she wanted to do instead of blindly following or agreeing. also it’s open ended if wonwoo moved on or continued to stay there; if he chose the latter, he would basically be hunted down by exorcists so who knows if he made it out then lol.

and yes i made up my own lore lol. so if there are any questions i can further explain or expand upon this world 🫶

if you made it this far, please reblog!

have a nice day/night 🫶

[hazbinhazmeinachokehold]

Alastor + apprentice!child!reader

A/n: this is some practice to get a footing in his character. (Also slight practice on husk as well.)

Reader is kinda scary but means well overall

Not proofread

Y/n ever elusive. Alastor would randomly mention your name in conversations. References your rampages and your sweetness in the same breath. But when anyone would try to quiz him on you further he would act like he didn't know what they were talking about. He might try to claim it's for privacy but it's pretty obvious he just likes messing with hotel members.

Charlie was especially sad that she might never get to meet you. If Alastor was to be believed you seemed really sweet! (And easy to rehabilitate *cough* *cough*) Also cool! You seemed to be an absolute powerhouse. After Al mentioned you Charlie got somewhat mopey. Until he mentioned you visiting the hotel, which piqued everyone's interest.

When you finally showed up, people's interest was at an all-time high. But now it was because the fabled y/n was a child. "It's a pleasure to be meeting everyone!" You were looking at Alastor but were speaking to the whole room. "I've heard so much about all of you!"

"They've also heard much about you too, dearie." Alastor bent at the waist down to your level. "You've become quite the hot topic here!"

As if to prove his point Charlie picked you up and spun you around almost hitting Alastor in the face. He glared at her but remained calm. "Welcome, welcome! Do you want to choose a room to stay in?"

"Sorry, but I'm not planning to stay."

"I know but just for the time being." Charlie clarified. To that, you nodded. Husk snapped his head toward The Radio Demon once both you and Charlie had left.

"Did you really stoop low enough to make a deal with a child?" He was just barely containing his anger. While he didn't particularly care for those he didn't know at least somewhat personally, taking a child's soul was a place he drew a thick line.

"Why of course not!" He said sounding offended but clearly, it was to mock Husk. "They are under my guidance purely by choice!" Vaggie and Husk both said some version of 'you're a liar' in unison. Alastor simply tsked as he walked away.

Niffty seemingly appeared out of nowhere. "Was thas thay y/n?"

After the crew (excluding Husk) let out a yelp, Vaggie spoke, "Yep."

Niffty let out a villain-esque laugh, though that was just her usual laugh, "I've been meaning to talk to them since they scared off a group of bad boys~" She flashed her sharp teeth and held a knife. Angel grabbed the knife and her before she could get very far.

Back with you and Charlie Alastor materialized next to you and you waved at him.

"Hello, sir!" You saluted him as a joke.

"Hello to you too! Have you found a room?" You nodded and entered said room. Charlie looked at him, her face painted with a confused yet kind look.

"They're the one who hurt so many people? Are you kidding? They are so nice."

"You've never seen them in danger." Suddenly as if on queue an explosion was heard. You shot up from your surprisingly comfortable bed and ran downstairs. Pushing both Charlie and Alastor out of the way while also throwing a quick ‘sorry’ their way.

Once you got downstairs the bad boys that Niffty mentioned earlier were spouting something about you. Once they looked at you they pulled weapons out. You grew and your arms turned pitch black with a slight claw shape. With your new size, you were just big enough to grab them to the point of almost cracking bones. Almost.

"Leave." You said with a deep booming voice that came with the size. You threw them and they scrambled. Once they were gone you shrunk back down to your normal size. Niffty pouted and stamped her foot.

Once you turned everyone had varying looks of shock on their face except Niffty and of course, Alastor who was instead proud. "Congrats dear! Would you like some jambalaya?" You nodded.

As you were walking with him Husk grabbed your shoulder, "Um good job kid... If he ever offers you a deal, don't take it." He felt obliged to warn you. If Alastor's moral code was against recruiting kids, he probably would have pounced on the opportunity to take your soul once you were an adult.

You smiled, "I know I know. But what could I even gain out of any deal with him?" You laughed and walked back to Alastor. Huh. Well, you certainly were being tutored by Alastor.

A/n: Y/n got kinda of edgy at the end-

[endless-weightless]

Ford Pines x GN!reader headcanons!

I'm surprised it took me this long to get into Gravity Falls. Anyways this has both SFW and NSFW so beware. There's also a brief mention of being AFAB as a possibility but other than that it's completely gender neutral (I'm 99% sure, I didn't proofread too well lol).

SFW

Right off the bat, I’m saying he’s autistic because so am I and I said so.

If you’re someone who needs reassurance or is generally anxious/paranoid about anything he’ll go into long (often scientific) explanations to ease your mind and also throw in some fun facts.

Both a listener and a yapper. He loves nothing more than the sound of your voice but also loves being able to spout all sorts of things about his research and interests while you stare at him lovingly.

Can’t sleep unless you’re next to him. You don’t even need to be cuddling, your presence is just the one thing he needs to fall asleep.

That being said, he will NEVER pass up an opportunity to cuddle. Watching a movie? Cuddling. Working at his desk in the lab? Cuddling on his lap. Cooking something in the kitchen? He’s got his arms wrapped around you as he presses loving kisses into your temple.

He rarely swears, but when he does it always makes you do a double-take (and maybe giggle because it sounds so odd coming from him).

Probably tried weed once or twice in the '70s and was somewhat part of the psychedelic rock scene. Stan has some old photos of him during that time somewhere but Ford is absolutely mortified by the idea of you seeing him in bell-bottom jeans.

It doesn’t matter how long you two have been together, every time he sees you he feels the same as he did the day you two met. Ford will never stop becoming flustered at the sight of you.

Post-Weirdmaggedon he became very anxious at the thought of you being out alone or not being near him. He feels like he needs to be on guard at all times so that he can protect you. He eventually calms down after some reassurance from you and a fuck ton of therapy.

While he lacks some emotional intelligence he’s actually very attentive and knows exactly what you need when you’re upfront about your feelings. As long as you’re not vague and communicate, he knows what to do to help you.

Adding onto that, I think he briefly studied psychology in college so he’d have a pretty good understanding of any mental health issues you might have.

Said “No more Mr Nice Guy” one time and hasn’t heard the end of it from anyone.

NSFW

Has to stop himself from cumming too quickly when you tell him how good he’s making you feel. Stroking his ego (and other things) is the best way to get him horny.

Will always ask you for consent no matter what it is. You could be mid-fuck and he’d still ask if he could put his hands on your hips.

This is just my personal headcanon but I believe while he didn’t really have too much experience before he got stuck on the other side of the portal (probably hooked up with Fiddleford once or twice tho), I fully believe that after a few years of dimension-hopping, he would’ve had a few one-night stands (mans gotta blow off some steam). So when he gets the chance to fuck you, a real human from his dimension, he’s more than ecstatic, especially since he’s picked up more than a few tricks over the past thirty years.

Knows how to use all twelve of his fingers.

Since Ford was sucked into the portal in the early ’80s and spent thirty years in there, he’s super confused when you mention shaving down there or being embarrassed about your body hair (if you do either) since the last time he was around everyone preferred going all natural.

This one’s less sexy but I’m putting it here anyways. He avoided taking off his shirt for ages since he didn’t want you to see all the scars he’d gotten over the years or any of the tattoos related to the things he did in the portal, especially the ones related to Bill. Surprisingly not as insecure about his “Flirty Gal” tramp stamp.

Doesn’t understand that he’s ridiculously hot. 

You jokingly said “Yes sir” one time and he got hard so quickly.

Although he does rather enjoy you taking the lead.

Loves experimenting with cock warming and edging. Literally. He’ll time the both of you and have everything written down somewhere and draw a graph with extra info like if you’re someone with a menstrual cycle and how that affects the results.

[lelengerine]

pairing. haechan x reader

synopsis. under the light of a lamp post, maybe love isn't so lonely after all

genre. mentions of bruises, a lot of mixed signals from hyuck + comfort (it's a little messy ngl), cussing, friends to ???, no specific pronouns used, not proofread, lmk if there's anything i missed!

wc. 1.9k words

notes. hilu…! i’ve finally gained motivation again hehe so u can say i'm back somewhat :> it really does feel nice writing again TT likes and feedback are highly appreciated <3

m.list

you trudged along the dimly lit sidewalk, each step amplifying the dull ache in your heels. it had been a long night of forced smiles and polite conversation—your third blind date this month. the universe seemed to be testing your patience, and you were beginning to wonder if you had any left. the conversations felt hollow, the people you met like fleeting shadows, their words empty and their intentions hidden behind a facade of politeness. tonight's date was no different—another self-absorbed narcissist who only paused his monologue long enough to take a breath before launching into yet another tedious story about himself.

you were utterly sick and tired.

the vibrant atmosphere of bars and the energetic crowd you once thought would lift your spirits now felt suffocating, leaving you more alone and out of place than ever. it was a sharp contrast to the hope you had felt earlier in the evening, and the reality of your disappointment weighed heavily on you.

your feet throbbed, bruised from the heels you'd worn in a futile attempt to feel confident and put together. the bitter taste of the evening lingered, a reminder of yet another failed attempt to find something meaningful to cling on for a while. desperate for some relief, you stumbled toward the nearest convenience store, drawn by the promise of fluorescent lights and the comfort of solitude. the harsh glow overhead made the aisles feel cold and unwelcoming, but you ignored it, grabbing a pack of band-aids from the counter as if they could somehow patch up more than just the blisters on your feet.

as you reached for your wallet, a familiar hand appeared beside yours, placing a few cups of instant ramen down alongside your purchase. the sight of him made your heart lift, even in your weary state.

“rough night?” his voice was gentle, laced with concern as he paid for the items. you looked up, meeting haechan’s gaze, and despite everything, you felt a small spark of comfort.

“do i even need to answer that question, hyuck?” you replied with a soft, tired chuckle. you tried to keep it light, but the exhaustion was evident in your eyes, in the way your shoulders sagged under the weight of the night.

“is it a crime to ask questions of concern in this day and age?” he retorted with a smirk, though his eyes softened as he took in your worn expression.

“i’m afraid so,” you teased back, though your smile was faint.

haechan snickered quietly, taking the paper bag of paid goods from the cashier. he gestured for you to follow him outside, and you gratefully accepted, the cool night air a welcome change from the stifling atmosphere of the date you had just escaped. as you both walked to a nearby bench, you couldn’t help but notice how his presence grounded you, making you feel a little less lost.

sitting down, haechan reached into the bag and pulled out the pack of band-aids, his movements careful and deliberate. it was such a simple gesture, but it felt like a lifeline in the sea of disappointment you were drowning in.

“so, why the long face?” he asked, his tone genuinely curious as he began to unwrap one of the band-aids.

“shitty date,” you murmured, your voice barely above a whisper. you watched as he gently lifted your foot onto his lap despite your initial reluctance. his touch was surprisingly tender, the soft glow of the nearby lamp post highlighting his features in a way that made him seem almost ethereal. somehow, the thought was enough to distract you from the sting of the evening’s failures.

haechan’s expression softened even more as he worked, his gaze focused solely on you. “i told you not to go on those anymore,” he said, a hint of reproach in his voice.

“i know,” you admitted, feeling a mix of gratitude and guilt. his touch was soothing, and with each carefully applied band-aid, the pain in your feet seemed to fade, though the ache in your heart lingered.

“there are really creepy guys out there, you know? i don’t know what i’d do if—”

“hyuck,” you interrupted, your tone more serious than before, “you’re making it sound like you’d beat them up without hesitation.”

“i would… for you,” he replied quietly before glancing up at you, his eyes reflecting a mix of affection and concern. “how are you even going to defend yourself? look at you!”

“you care too much,” you said, a hint of a smile on your lips, though your voice betrayed how much his words meant to you.

“i care the right amount,” he countered, his voice steady but filled with warmth.

“no one else would put on bandages for me aside from you,” you confessed, feeling a pang of vulnerability as you spoke. it was true—people often tiptoed around boundaries, but with him, those lines always seemed to blur in a way that allowed for solace and confusion to swirl up within you.

“then maybe everyone else should learn from me,” haechan said with a small, triumphant grin, though his eyes remained serious.

“hyuck,” you began, hesitating as you tried to gather the courage to voice the thoughts that had been gnawing at you. he let out a small hum to let you know he was listening, busying himself with peeling another band-aid out of its packaging. “please tell me if you only mean to lead me on.”

his expression shifted to one of shock and bewilderment, his hands freezing in place. “how did you even come to a conclusion like that?”

“i know you’re probably just being a good person, but… you care for me more than others do. you make me feel special, like i have a place in your heart—even if i know that isn’t truly the case and i’m only being hopeful.”

haechan’s eyes searched yours, and for a moment, the world seemed to pause. “you think that’s all this is?” he asked softly.

“then why does it feel like we’re always dancing around something?”

haechan’s gaze was steady, his hand resting gently on yours. “maybe we are. but if there’s one thing i’ve learned, it’s that love isn’t always easy or straightforward. sometimes, it’s about finding comfort in the moments when you’re together, despite the uncertainties.”

as the night deepened, the air between you both seemed to shift. the loneliness that had weighed so heavily on you earlier began to recede, replaced by a quiet connection that felt more real than any conversation you’d had in recent weeks. haechan’s presence was a comforting reminder that, amidst the loneliness and the search for something meaningful, you had found a spark of something genuine.

with a soft sigh, you leaned closer to him, finding solace in his proximity. “maybe love is lonely sometimes,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper, “but tonight, i’m just glad it’s not so lonely with you here.”

“me too.”

[jvnluvr]

nightplumes ; sylus ♡

author's note: hello... it's been like a year. >< blog will be going under some theme changes soon- and i'm writing for love and deepspace as well. not proofread. loosely based on sylus' 'nightplumes' card but majorly just fluff written by yours truly. comments and feedback are appreciated! otherwise enjoy soft sylus, <3

after a quick ride out of the N109 zone, you and sylus reach a somewhat secluded bridge with the dove he had been taking care of over the past week. you perch the dove onto his hand, giving him a nod as he releases it back into the wild. you look up as you watch it fly off into the distance, a tiny smile making its way to your lips knowing it'll find its way somewhere. you move your hands into your jacket, letting out a sigh as you turn back to sylus, who is surprisingly looking at you intently. "what's wrong?" you question, moving slightly towards him as you notice the city lights behind his figure.

he remains silent, putting his hands into his pockets before turning around to view the scenery. you tilt your head slightly, confused by his demeanour; yet, you have little time to ponder upon it as you hear a sudden burst in the sky. your head whips up and a beautiful array of fireworks lights up the area in front of you, the light falling of snow making the sky seem all the more magical. you run up next to sylus, leaning against the side of the bridge to get a closer look at him.

the light of the fireworks is reflecting in his eyes... he looks... surprised?

"...sylus, i've noticed that whenever you want to protect something, you always make sure to protect it well." you breathe out, continuing to look at him. "whether that be a dove or a person."

he turns around, raising an eyebrow at you as he replies, "is it only when i'm willing?"

you think, only for a moment, before saying, "yeah, only when you want to do it."

you pursed your lips before turning back to the view in front of you. the lights of the ongoing fireworks reflect into the river underneath. it's peaceful for another moment, only the wind breezing past you two before sylus speaks again.

"you think too highly of me. i'm not a philanthropist." his words almost send another gust of cold wind into your face. almost.

but you don't really seem to care about the meaning of his words in this moment.

"doesn't matter. after all,-" you look at him once again, "i'm not a dove that needs your protection."

sylus lets out a little sound, turning his head to the side before looking back at you. "...is that so?" he questions, to which you give a little nod.

another couple of seconds pass, and you both return to watching the fireworks in silence. they're stunning, but there's a lingering tension amid the air, which makes you gaze back at sylus. he notices your staring, turning in your direction once again.

"what?" he says in a curt voice.

"there's snow in your hair." you point out.

sylus immediately moves his head down, closer to your face as he replies, "help me."

you reach out your hand and lightly tussle his hair, the snowflakes quickly dissipating as they fall to the ground. you let yourself smile again, finding it a bit silly that he asked you to remove the snow. as you pull your hand away, he grabs onto it for a moment, only to quickly let go as he sees your eyes widen. and once again, you both turn back to watch the fireworks.

the silence is a bit awkward...

"the fireworks are pretty, aren't they?" you muse, putting one hand on the ledge before looking at sylus.

his crimson eyes bore into yours; yet, a gentle smile lights up his face, moving his fingers to draw a small cat into the snow. is it supposed to be you? you didn't realize the leader of onichynus would be so playful.

"pretty, like a little kitten i see here," he remarks, finishing his tiny drawing with a smug expression.

you take some snow and press it against his face as a retort, laughing at your own trick. sylus flinches at first- an annoyed look plastered across his face. but once he takes your laughter in, his gaze visibly softens. he pats your head gently, wrapping your scarf properly around your neck.

"don't want you getting cold now, do we sweetie?" he teases, grabbing your hand and wrapping it around his. you both resume admiring the fireworks, indulging in the cold and quiet night outside of linkon city.

maybe this weather was enough to turn a crow into a dove.

[dollcherray]

may I request part 2 of the creepy doll reader? mainly with Jax and her starting to show him kindness... like head pats when he saves one of the cast members! :) this is something I thought of randomly: jax is minding his business while everyone is playing with digital flowers that came made for an experiment. then the reader walks up to him with something behind her back, Jax turns his head away and braces himself, scared, but instead of an axe he feels... something light on his head? he looks up and sees a flower crown on his head and he then looks at the reader with a confused look. there's a long pause but before Jax finally speaks she cuts him off with "equality bi(beep)h" "there she is" Jax says with sarcasm in his voice

๋࣭ ⭑ IRRITATING BUT LOVING ₊˚⊹

ᛝྀི JAX WITH CREEPY DOLL READER PT 2

₊˚⊹♡ Notes: Honey i am HORRIBLY sorry for the wait, i was on a long hiatus because of school but now im finally able to write for your request! (along with others) this post is somewhat of a part 2 from this post, the reader is fem in this, not proofread.

๋࣭ ⭑۶ৎ Type: Fluff, Platonic/romantic, Oneshot.

˚ ⋆ ⊹ Song: Playdate

Irritating.

It's all it was to him; blood boiling.

The people stuck here with him, the ambience, the circus, the fake names, the fake food, the stupid flowers.

And he still tried to keep his sanity together, even though it was getting more challenging for him every day he woke up in the same fake bed, in the same fake bedroom, but even if everything was overwhelming for him, he kept himself together.

But then you came along.

You made everything so much harder! scaring him off every time he tried to tease or prank you, threatening him mercilessly, why must you be like this?! why couldn't you just be like the others and get mad at him?!

Doesn't matter what he did, say or think, he was scared of you and it was also another thing that made him so irritated.

It was all he could think, not only now, but since the moment he realized your influence on him.

"Stupid doll girl, who the f@#& does she think she is" Jax angrily vented under his breath while he looked and fiddled with the flowers while crouched down the floor, his touches and eyes filled with disdain, his little way to inject his anger towards other things.

Unfortunately for him, he was so angry that he failed to check his surroundings and notice the source of his problems approaching him, with something she blocked from his view in her hands.

When Jax finally realized the doll girl was approaching, it was too late, she already was starting to raise her hands with the mysterious object.

The purple bunny only braced himself; preparing for whatever sharp object you had to meet his head, forcing his eyes shut and finally feeling-

...something light in his head..?

The bunny boy opened his eyes hesitantly, right eye first: checking if you don't have any other trick up your sleeve, once assured he fully opened his left eye, only to finally get a glimpse on your expression.

it was lovely...

A lovely and sweet smile plastered around your plastic face, eyes lifeless but somehow full of peace, what... did you put in his head?

A yellow gloved hand reached out for his own head, carefully landing his fingertips on whatever you placed on his head, gently brushing it to the sides, still cautious with the mysterious... hat? object? you putted above his head.

It was a flower crown?

Ok, sure, you were showing slight signs of you warming up to him, every time he did something cool or selfless you were there to "compensate" him for the kind action.

Yet he rarely did something nice, so to him it was just your little way to tease him, and it made him annoyed.

But... this was surprisingly nice, like you really meant to and it didn't make his digital blood boil.

There was a silent staring competition between you two after that "strange" interaction, but it didn't last long when Jax tried to open his mouth to talk only to be cut off by you.

"Equality, b#)$+@"

was all you said before turning around and moving to another place in the large set up garden, leaving Jax on the flowery ground, he couldn't help but smirk at your funny remark.

"There she is."

He said after the funny event.

the lovingly funny event.

[woniverse-writes]

"Moth to a Flame (part 1.5)"

Bada Lee x Reader

part 1 ⟵ part 1.5 ⟶ part 2

series masterlist

summary: all teams react to the first episode of street woman fighter season 2

word count: 1.7k

warnings: surprisingly no swearing lol, uhhhm I don't think there are actually any warnings for this chapter, not proofread

The members of Jam Republic settle in on the couches and chairs of the dance studio lounge room surrounded by staff as they get ready to watch the premier of Street Woman Fighter Season 2. Kirsten already has her phone out and ready, Latrice is on face time with her brother, and Ling is taking pictures of the three youngest members as they pose and mess around. The camera crew is doing some last-minute sound and lighting checks, even though this would just be some extra reaction content posted on the choom’s YouTube channel. 

A few miles away was team Bebe, were all cuddled up together on their couch in the Just Jerk studio lounge. They were waiting for Tatter and Minah to arrive, seeing as they were both in a class at the moment, but both were supposed to get there right as the show would be starting. They were offered some energy drinks while waiting, which the team gladly took.

Once the show started playing everyone was screaming and cheering in excitement, all phones having pulled out to record the introduction. After getting past the initial shock of seeing themselves on TV, the girls returned to their seats and got comfortable again. The team introductions and reactions were shown first leaving some laughing in annoyance at the reminder of the comments, while others stressed out about the things they had said only for the sake of the competition.

When Jam Republic came on the screen an uproar in almost every single team space occurred. They all restated their previous positive opinions of the team- like how Kirsten was well-known, Audrey had the face of an angel, and y/n was a princess. But they also brought up y/n’s initial anger issues. They all remember how scary she seemed back then, and now they all laugh at it because while it is still scary, she’s very cute. The editors put scary music over her at first when she started glaring, but then cut to her pouting a few minutes later and put a kitten meow over it, which caused y/n to roll her eyes and giggle while all of her teammates burst out laughing. The reactions of other teams were quite similar with them all dying laughing as well and calling her cute.

“Our baby” Tatter cooed making grabby hands at the screen, causing everyone else to tether giggle or chime in. Bada surprisingly didn’t really say much, she just smiled and giggled, looking extremely in love

They show Bada and redy’s battle and jam republic is reliving their emotions that occurred a few months prior when the show was shot. y/n giggles and leans on her hand hiding behind it as she rewatches the scene. she smiles shyly at the older girl’s moves, reacting much more tamed this time compared to her original reaction. Said reaction was aired immediately after the battle ended, including the part where Kirsten pointed out her intense blush which caused her and all her teammates to laugh, y/n somewhat lowering her head and laughing softly in embarrassment. they also happened to air what was said shortly after when y/n said “The way she got up in Redy’s face- UGH I WOULD’VE DIED” causing y/n’s eyes to widen briefly before she immediately buried her face in her hands as the rest of jam republic died of laughter

Team Bebe’s reaction to the battle was as usual- hyping Bada up and laughing over the drama, but they were definitely more interested in the reactions, especially y/n’s. When the screen panned to the small girl with her hand on her forehead as she stood in a daze, the blue team instantly burst out laughing, including Bada who had no idea this was how y/n had been reacting to her. Then as they heard her say she would’ve died if Bada got in her face as she did with redy, Bada hid behind her hands and smiled embarrassedly as her teammates ‘ooh’ed and teased her

“With that logic, I can’t believe she’s still alive…” Lusher mumbled but everyone heard it, causing another uproar of jeers and claps from the team

“I can’t believe I didn’t listen to you back then” Bada muttered still hiding behind her hands as she glanced over to Lusher, who just smirked and shrugged her shoulders. Shortly after that the battle between y/n and Lusher comes on and the editing overdramatizes the whole thing making it seem like y/n was going to pick Bada by adding long pauses and cuts in between her words.

Everyone thought your interaction beforehand with Lusher was cute, as you shook hands and wished each other good luck- seeing as your reaction was that of a slightly breathless fangirl who just met her celebrity crush. Other teams giggled and cooed at your bright smile and wide eyes

“y/n just looks so happy to be there-” Lia Kim said with an endeared smile and the rest of her team agreed all sharing a similar reaction. Bebe is hyping Lusher up even as they rewatch the battle that already occurred, loving how fired up she had gotten during it- It showed the part where she ruffled y/n’s hair before the switch and everyone freaked out

“I hope you know I really thought about killing you for a hot second in that moment…” Bada joked with Lusher who chuckled and nodded her head

“I did it more so to provoke you than her” the younger girl responded causing her leader to scoff and roll her eyes while letting out a sarcastic ‘of course’- but when y/n started dancing lusher was the first to get even more hyped

“YEEEAH THAT’S MY BABY GIRL” the girl was hyping up her then-opponent, now-friend, as if she weren’t the one in a battle against her. Her team laughed at her antics before they all began excitedly chattering about how amazing of a battle it was, and how y/n’s power and personality were showcased perfectly. And just like y/n’s reaction was aired, Bada’s gay panic sent every single member of every team into an uncontrollable fit of laughter when it was shown immediately following y/n’s ‘razzi shots’ move

“Oh my god, I’m crying- that was the funniest thing ever” Redlic wiped tears from her eyes, still trying to calm her laughter.

“I never thought I’d see Bada react like that” Mina Myoung stated, amused and lowkey satisfied by the usually cool leader’s anything-but-cool reaction.

“We’re usually the ones reacting to Bada like that, so it’s definitely refreshing seeing that she really is just like us-” “and toward y/n, which is absolutely justifiable” the two biggest y/n supporters- Redy and Harimu- conversed aloud. Of course, other teams’ reactions were shown to her dancing, but the editing specifically highlighted Bada fumbling to pull herself together as y/n sexily finished her half of the battle. Just like everyone else, team Bebe was laughing hysterically- all except their dear leader of course, who was now curled into a ball on the couch, covering her head with her arms as she hid behind Lusher and screamed in denial

“I CAN’T BELIEVE I ACTUALLY REACTED LIKE THAT” Bada screamed into Lusher’s shoulder as her members only laughed harder at her muffled stress

“I CAN’T BELIEVE THEY ACTUALLY AIRED IT” Minah responded practically crying with how hard she was cackling. When Jam Republic saw it they all freaked out as well but screamed and shook y/n around as she sat shell-shocked in her spot in between Audrey and Emma on the couch. y/n’s eyes were as wide as possible as her jaw practically lay on the floor. They ended up having to pause the episode because even the older members couldn’t bring themselves to calm down. y/n sat completely zoned out for the next seven-ish minutes, trying to calm down her heated face. While Bada was also zoned out for a while, it was because she was having an internal mental breakdown.

The episode ended right as Lia Kim and Mina Myoung were about to battle, leaving the audience in suspense as they wouldn’t be airing it until the following week, which left everyone annoyed but excited for the next episode. After it ended, everyone debriefed for a few moments but they were mostly talking about the connections. The teams discussed how there was a lot of history between certain contestants- like Mina Myoung and Lia Kim, Bada and Redy, and then Harimu and Redlic. After talking about the old relationships, they all somehow managed to have similar conversations about building new connections with other dancers

“I was surprised at how reactive Bada was, especially towards y/n…” Mina Myoung snickered, still grinning away at the thought of Bada losing her composure.

“Yeah but everyone was reactive toward y/n-” Gooseul commented in reaction, but was immediately cut off 

“Right, but Bada is usually pretty chill and reserved… her reactions to that girl were anything but reserved” They all laughed and agreed

In the Jam Republic space, all the members were doing the same as every other team by debriefing.

“I think we got a pretty positive reaction out of them!” Kirsten happily noted with a lifted tone of voice

“We definitely proved them wrong, especially with our secret weapons-” Emma moved to ruffle Audrey's hair while squeezing y/n, causing the two youngest to complain but the older members to chuckle.

“I guess they did really like us, huh y/n?” Audrey smugly observed and prompted the other to respond

“Hm, it sure seemed like it.” the youngest chuckled with raised eyebrows, still slightly in shock by how much cooler she looked on TV- loving how she could see everyone’s reaction and hear their comments. It really boosted her ego when she realized that was Bada’s first impression of her… they had known each other for a while now, so it was pretty normal for her to see the older girl have similar reactions to the ones she did in the episode- but it didn’t hit y/n right away that this was all months ago before the two girls really knew each other. They had been through a lot since then and were still recovering from some of it, but y/n and Bada definitely had a better understanding of each other now.

taglist (open): @tinybada @angel-hyuckie @violetinferno @jesuschrist2006 @1luvkarina @uwulyn @justandloyal2961 @deadgirlwalking3 @heeheemich @squidvoldyvoid @vivzyo @ouhaika @jksjx @ocyeanicc @marianamartinsthings @jxrdxnh @luvjanexx @lorenztired @khjssss @heavenlycloud @loisje123 @starchasermyloves @zhivaxo @grinnwolph @notyourd0lly @stinkbvgs @nermandiiiii-blog @abllucena @arujee @idontknownemore @thatgayinsomniac @l-a-u-r-a--b @fruitr0llup @cgriffin9797-blog @woooooya @kaaylvst @ssc7514 @astoreea @linda-botello @kpopgirl-97 @erikook @majookim @okjaeminn @misszoldyc @sammisregrets @jysai @moonsvrse @froufrousnowman @amararosesblog @tikitsune @aestrelle19 @laaaasanielzz @randomhoex @tswisal1 @leasha25823 @unpretty-reader @charlesswife

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[asvtrials]

can you please write a smut story about Bjorn? I loved the one from your master list and your fluff ones were just incredible I really want to give you freedom for this story cause you’re writing style is addictive 🫀🫀 go nuts!!

Bjorn x fem!reader, minors dni!

summary: What started as an attempt to talk yourself out of the scavenging trip, turned into proving to Bjorn that you are not as proper as he thinks. warnings/tags: smut, shotgunning, smoking weed, riding, p in v, swearing, manipulative Bjorn if you squint your eyes, reader is kind of inexperienced, not proofreader, NOT that accurate to the alien timeline a/n: Thank you for the ask! I'm glad you like my writing! <333 w/c: 2.6k words English is not my first language. Sorry for any mistakes I make.

── ୨ৎ

Tyler's words swirled in your mind as you stared at the ceiling of your trailer. Sweat coated your forehead as the endless possibilities of what could go wrong invaded your thoughts the more you tried to relax and go to sleep. 

It hasn't been an hour since you returned from Tyler and Kay's trailer, and you haven't been able to relax.

 You were never the ‘easy-going’ type but to be fair, Tyler and Navarro's plan was beyond reckless and dangerous. It was impossible.

If anything goes wrong you could easily be stuck in Jackson's Star for the rest of your miserable life to mine coal for Weyland Yutani.

That thought really woke you up, any hit of drowsiness disappearing completely. You sat up, rubbing your face. You checked the clock, “1:08”.

It's not that late.

Tyler wouldn't mind, would he? You just needed to know some details, and maybe say you can't join them.

Yes, that's the right thing to do.

You stood up, throwing on the clothes you previously wore and grabbed your keys before stepping out of your trailer.

The walk wasn't far but you felt guilt the closer you got. You hoped he wouldn't be asleep when you gently knocked on the door.

Part of you hoped he wouldn't answer, maybe then you'd finally do something reckless for once. Before you could finish your thought the door swung up and instead of Tyler you saw-

“Bjorn…Hey.” You muttered as you looked at him.

He stared at you perplexed, cigarette hanging from his plush lips.

“Forgot somethin’?” He mumbled.

“Uh, no. I wanted to talk to Tyler, is he here?” You replied, stepping up the metal steps.

“Not here, sorry to disappoint.” He said but moved to the side to let you in. “Ya wanted him…why exactly?” He asked, his voice gruff and dripping with implication.

You weren't sure if you wanted to share your fears with Bjorn. The number of times that he had made fun of Rain and even you for being reluctant made you somewhat standoffish around him. His loud and hot-headed personality didn't particularly help his reliability.

“What about Kay?” You tried to change the subject.

“With Rain, probably.” He spoke, sitting back down on the couch and blowing off a drag from his mouth.

A string of coughs escaped you when you smelled the smoke, he chuckled lightly. You should've guessed he was smoking weed by the redness in his eyes and his rough voice.

“Right” You muttered awkwardly, trying to clear your scratchy throat. “Sorry.”

“Ya didn't say wha’ you wanted him fo’.” He spoke before you could reach for the door handle.

“Nothing serious, just wanted to ask some questions.” You answered vaguely.

“Mm” He hummed, staring at his blunt before taking a long drag “Sorry to cock-block ya” He chuckled and blowed out the smoke.

You furrowed your brows in confusion. “That's not what i-” you tried to defend.

“Relax. I just didn't think ya were like that, that's all.” He cut you off, finally taking his eyes away from his joint and focusing, as much as he could, on you.

His focus wasn't something you felt like you wanted, nor you ever get since you never spent any time alone with him. 

But having his eyes on you was surprisingly pleasant…

“I really just wanted to ask some questions.” You repeated, voice louder this time.

“Okay, bloody hell.” He swore under his breath.

You wanted to turn around and leave but his previous words still played in your mind “And what does “like that” mean?” You asked, accusation evident in your tone “What am I not like?” 

Bjorn sighed irritated. He groaned and some smoke escaped from his nose “Y’know, like a hooking up kinda chick.”

You could feel your anger babbling in your chest “You think I can't hook up with someone?” You retorted.

Bjorn’s glossy, reddened eyes seemed more focused as he slowly dragged them down your figure. “Nah, you can. I just don't think you do.” He murmured, a sly smile spreading across his face. 

The warmness that spread on your face made you feel almost as confused as his words. Especially since his words were true. You never did that sort of stuff. The idea of sleeping with someone you didn't know wasn't something you ever felt like doing.

But his words still pushed you to argue. “You think I'm some goody-two-shoes that has no life?” 

Bjorn didn't answer, just brought the blunt to his lips. He eyed you, shrugging mockingly..

You scoffed, muttering a small “whatever” but once again his words stopped you.

“Here.” 

When you turned you were met with Bjorn extending his hand to you, his blunt sitting lazily between his fingers.

You narrowed your eyes.

“Oh yeh, forgot ya didn’t smoke” He taunted and turned his face away.

“You’re such a fucking ass…” You muttered and walked to him. Before he could bring the cigarette to his lips you snatch it, bringing it to yours instead.

You wanted to believe it was because he was challenging you, underestimating you even but a small part of you knew that now that you got a taste of his attention, you wanted more—no, needed more.

You took a long, deep drag, keeping your eyes on Bjorn’s surprised ones. You kept your cool, the bitter taste invading your lungs but you kept your cough in. You broke when you saw Bjorn's mouth slowly twist into a smirk, a very approving one…

You coughed harder than before, the smoke coming out of your mouth wasn’t helping you at all. Bjorn cackled at your reaction and held your waist, prompting you to sit down.

“Jesus, Y/n” He laughed when your coughing fit came to an end. “I’m impressed.”

“Shut up.” You muttered but couldn’t stop the small smile that crept to your face.

Bjorn brought the cigarette to his lips, taking a slow puff, the same cigarette that sat between your lips moments ago.

You blushed.

The room fell silent but your thoughts about leaving the trailer were long gone. And not only because of the dizziness that slowly made its way to your sleepy mind.

You don't know if it's the substance that infested your mind but your eyes kept flickering back to Bjorn, or more accurately, his lips. 

Your tongue ran over your bottom lip as he opened his mouth and let the smoke escape his mouth.

You didn't miss the way your lips opened slightly to breathe in, letting the smoke explore your mouth. He didn't miss it either.

“Ya know…Ty won't be her’ for anotha hour or so…” He began, his eyes meeting your for a moment before letting them travel down your warm face, stopping at your lips. “If you wanna try doin’ otha things…i can help ya.”

You knew what he meant and for some reason you didn't back down. You didn't slap him and tell him that he's disgusting, neither did you sent him to hell and run off the trailer.

Instead you moved to him, your lips so close you could feel the smoke slowly moving past to your own lips.

You didn't wait for him to make a move. You closed the gap between you and pressed your lips against his without much thought.

Bjorn didn't take long to react, kissing back with the force that you lacked. Still, you tried to keep up with his hungry movements as his hands quickly wrapped around your waist.

You gasped in surprise when he bit your bottom lip. Bjorn didn't waste any time to push his tongue past your lips.

Your tongues and lips moved hungrily against each other. His eagerness made you wonder if he had noticed you before you realized.

You shivered when his hands slid under your shirt and gripped the delicate skin of your waist. 

“Bjorn—” You broke the kiss making the boy frown.

You didn't wanna stop but your mind was starting to race, your thoughts coming back, and the fear of regret settling in.

Quickly, you grabbed his hand, attempting to take another drag from the blunt but Bjorn seized his hand back. 

“Ah, ah, ah.” He stopped with a crooked smile. “It's clear you're shit at this.”  Rather, he wrapped his lips around the cigarette, breathing in deeply.

“Stop being an assh—” You began but he silenced you when he grabbed the back of your neck, pulling you closer.

His thumb brushed your bottom lip, encouraging you to open your mouth and you found yourself complying without a second thought.

With a gentle breath, he let the smoke travel to your mouth like a snake, choking you for a second but giving you enough courage to move closer once again, brushing your bottom lip against his before diving in for another ravenous kiss.

Bjorn's hand moves to your hair, wrapping his fist around it and pulling you even closer. You hummed your own hand reaching to cup his face.

The scene was messy and frantic. Lips moving like you were trying to devour each other, hands clawing on clothes and skin like it was the only thing keeping you grounded. Bjorn's groans of pleasure encouraged you to let your soft sounds slip past your bruised lips.

Bjorn was the first one to break apart, throwing his head against the couch. “Shit, Y/n” He chuckled lowly, hands lazily roaming your back. 

You didn't say anything, you were too busy staring at his swollen, spit-painted lips. 

He cleared his throat. “You wanna keep goin’ or you want another one” He mumbled, wiggling the blunt between his fingers.

“I don't need it anymore.” You replied and you could see his lips twitch upwards.

Without warning, he closed the gap between you once again, leaning against you while attacking your already bruised lips.

He attempted to lay you down on the couch but you stopped him by tugging at his hair.

He pulled away only to move down to your neck, chuckling between kisses “Wussed out already?”

“No.” You breathed out, pulling at his hair to make him look at you in the eyes. “Maybe I just like being on top.”

With lust-clouded eyes, he smirked. “You keep surprising me, doll.”  A small whine left his lips when you tugged at his hair harder.

You kept surprising yourself too. Bjorn didn't seem to be a careful or attentive lover. He seemed selfish and rough and although the thought made your chest rise and fall faster, you weren't sure if you wanted to leave the pace up to him. Especially with how heightened the unfamiliar drug had made your senses.

To be fair, he looked just as excited to have you on top of him.

He grabbed the hem of your shirt and pulled it over your head, the split second your hands left him felt like pure misery for the both of you.

The drug really made you crazy, right?

Not wanting to let him have the upper hand, you took off his hoodie. Goosebumps covered both of your bodies but neither of you cared, grabbing and clawing at every piece of skin you could reach.

Normally, kissing as sloppily as you did now would leave you disgusted but all you wanted to do right now was consume him whole until you were spent and satisfied.

“Fuck…” he groaned and pulled at his belt, quickly undoing it.

You lifted your body a bit to let him push his pants down to his hips, taking his boxers too. His dick sprung up, settling against his stomach.

You eyed his member as he sloppily kissed your collarbone, but you were too focused on the fact that you haven't really been with many people, especially not people who were…as blessed.

“You gon’ stare for long? I don't mind but you promised me somethin’ else, doll.” He spoke against your neck. Despite his words, you could hear a small hint of pride underlining his tone.

“I didn't promise you anything.” You argued but stood up to remove your pants. You didn't even try to look sexy as you kicked your pants to the side. His hands gripped your thighs as you straddled his lap once again.

He fisted his cock and lined himself against your entrance impatiently. He threw his head back against the head of the couch, a loud moan left his lips at the feeling of his tip sliding oh so easily between your dripping folds,.

“Bjorn…” You mumbled and he looked up at you with a hum. Fuck, he already looked so fucked out… “Condom.”

He froze for a second, seemingly too out of it to comprehend your words at first. Quickly, he started to ruffle through his pockets hastily. 

“Shit.” He swore under his breath. He sighed when he found a forgotten condom in the back pocket of his jeans.

You chuckled at how eagerly he ripped the packaging and rolled the rubber down his length. He winced at the feeling but didn’t even flinch.

“Didn’t know you'd act like such a virgin” You teased breathlessly, your own panting making you unable to look as confident as you would've wished.

Bjorn didn't say anything. He grabbed your waist tightly, his short nails digging into your skin. You yelped but that pain was quickly replaced by the burning of your cunt being stretched as he slowly lowered you onto his dick.

You hissed and leaned closer, pressing his face against your neck, and Bjorn wrapped his arms around your waist tightly.

You moaned loudly against his ear. The feeling of being filled so deeply, so fully was addicting.

“Fuuuck” He groaned, pressing his lips on your skin seemingly unwittingly. “You’re so fucking tight.”

“It has been a while.” You chuckled, trying to get used to his size.

“Yeah. Bet you were waiting for the right one, huh?” He groaned, leaving open-mouthed kisses wherever he could find. 

“Fuck!” You moaned when he thrust into you.

He grabbed your hips, silently telling you to move. You complied, cycling your trembling hips on his cock. 

Bjorn dropped his joint from his hands ignoring how it fell to the ground in favor of grabbing your ass.

Tears collected on your lash line at the feeling of being this stretched. “Bjorn!” You moaned when he moved your hips faster.

“Wanted to do that for so long…” He groaned.

You squirmed and whined above him, not only by the speed at which he forced your hips to move but by his words as well.

“R-really?” You stuttered moving your head to pull at the hair on the back of his head.

“Fuckin’ hell. So fucking hot and you don't even know it” He whispered lowly “Wanted to fuck you the moment Rain brought you here.” 

You let out a moan that sounded more like a sob but that didn't stop Bjorn. He bounced you on his cock like his life depended on it.

He moved closer, seemingly wanting to kiss you but his own moans stopped him. You settled on sharing your choking breaths, wet lips brushing against each other the closer you got to the edge.

Your thighs trembled, attempting to tell him you're close but before you could even begin he quickly slid his hand on your clit, rubbing roughly.

“Go on, cum on my cock, darling.” He nearly growls.

“Please, Bjorn!” You cried his name over and over again until you came with a sob but he didn't stop. Even when you tried to push his thighs down, he kept thrusting deeper into you.

You cling to his shoulders as he came inside the condom with a strangled moan, grasping your ass tighter.

Good on you for trying to set the pace.

You weren't sure what to say but it turns out you didn't need to say anything. Bjorn's lips latched to yours once again, kissing you deeply.

This was definitely not the last time you decided to be adventurous.

[xxblairexxss]

Doudou (part 4, Charles’s ending)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

Pairing : Charles Leclerc x reader / Lando Norris x reader

Theme : Angst / Fluff

My heart broke for Lando. I’m so sorry. :( I haven’t proofread!

After everything that happened last week, you went on with your life. You started working, met new colleagues, and it felt like you were onto the next stage in your life. You were no longer a student, dying to catch up on the submission deadline and somehow, you were really enjoying it.

But it felt like something was missing, or someone. Someone who would be among the first one to congratulate you on your exam result, someone who always accompanied you staying up late going through files of different cases, someone who became your wall to lean on when things got so stressful you were so close to give up.

You spent every night thinking about him, about you and him. Yes, what he did was horrible but you remembered that aside from what happened that night, he never raised his voice, never cursed at you. He had always treated you like a delicate, dainty piece of flower. It felt unfair to judge him and to keep on punishing him based one part, and ignoring all the admirable and meaningful things he did before and after what happened. After all, he was still an important person to you. However, you had realised that he was somewhat different. Yes, didn’t shout, he didn’t curse at you after that night but it felt like he was walking on an egg shell around you, as if he didn’t know how to act.

But then again, you didn’t know what you would do if he was the one who asked you to give him space in this matter. Like, how would you act when you couldn’t touch the person that you spent days and nights with like you always did. How would you act when you were so used to have them locked in your arms one night but couldn’t even touch them the next day.

﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎

It was Wednesday night and you just had a long day at work. You skipped lunch because you got carried away and for some reason your social anxiety kicked in and you felt like these people would judge you to the core for trying to eat like a human being so now you were so famished you even had to chumble the chocolates that Charles gave you while waiting for your onion soup to simmer.

Speaking of Charles, you haven’t seen him after that night. New season is starting again in 2 weeks so he had been really busy going back and forth to Maranello but he never missed a call or text to check up on you.

And so was Lando.

“Oh my god, this new flavour is so good! What the heck did they put in this one?” You exclaimed and picked up the packaging to go through the ingredients. Somehow everything, anything was interesting to you at the moment. Your brain just needed to distract itself from thinking about how starving you were.

Then you heard a doorbell.

And you weren’t expecting anyone.

﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎

“Hi, I was thinking if you want to have dinner with me? The food’s on me.” He lifted the paper bag with a restaurant’s name on it and it was your favourite restaurant.

“Oh my god! How did you know?”

“You mentioned it during our Lego session the other day I thought it would be too last minute to have dinner at the restaurant so I ordered takeouts.”

Lando insisted that he wanted to try your onion soup though you kept on saying no. You weren’t that bad in cooking but if you knew you weren’t cooking for yourself and that someone else would like to try it, you would have paid more attention to it instead of just sprinkle sparkle eye level everything.

“I don’t want to be held responsible if you get food poisoning.”

“That’s alright, I won’t die.”

“Your have a race next week!”

“We have reserved driver for a reason.��

You could never win against him. There you were, spending another night in sweatshirts and baggy pants with Lando,

and your onion soup.

Which was surprisingly good. Not as good as a Michelin star restaurant as Lando claimed it to be but good for someone who cooked it while munching on chocolates.

“Are you nervous? I mean, the new season.”

“Hm, not really. Kinda excited for it. I have been driving the virtual car for months now. A real, hands-on experience would kick up the adrenaline again.”

“I think….” You trailed off and bit on your lips.

“Yeah?” Lando took another bite of the onion soup.

“I think I’m gonna give Charles another chance. What do you think?” You lifted up your gaze and beam timidly at him, feeling embarrassed to talk about your relationship problem with another guy, a friend of your ex-boyfriend at that.

When Lando caught your gaze, he caught your eyes making the same twinkle that made him stunned. Talk about timing. The first time he saw it up-close, it made his heart flutter and lost at words. Now that he saw it again, it still made him lost at words, but his heart didn’t flutter, it was smashed to pieces.

When Lando didn’t reply, you were slightly taken aback. You thought he would get mad or criticise your decision so you dipped your head down and started playing with your fingers.

“I think….” His voice halted your movement but you still didn’t look at him in the eyes.

“I think you should do what you heart desires, Y/N. After all, I am not the one to control your life because it’s yours but whatever it was, I’m gonna be with you, always, as your friend.”

Lando realised he didn’t actually have a lot of time with you. He thought he did. He spent half of the time loving you and the other half hiding how much he loved you.

“I’ll take back my Lego set with me, yeah?”

“I thought we were gonna finish it together?”

I don’t think there’s anymore chances for me to get to know you more so I don’t need it anymore was what Lando wanted to say.

“No, Y/N. We ran out of time. I ran out of time. The season is starting soon and I’m gonna start flying here there, remember? It’s okay, I won’t do it alone. I’ll bring it back and we can get it done together. Promise.”

One promise is made out of lie.

﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎

Charles had called you a few days after, telling you to get dressed and he was gonna pick you up at 8. He didn’t tell you the occasion, he didn’t tell you the details and here you were, in a fancy restaurant with all candle lights and fancy music in the background.

You weren’t sure if he had asked the restaurant for a privacy set up or this was how they set up the theme for their restaurant but your table was separated by a door or more like a room where the waiter would shut the door every time they walked in and out through the full-course dinner, leaving both of you all alone in your comfort space. There was also like a glass doors which opened on to a balcony with a view of Monaco at night.

Charles had asked you to head out to the balcony after dessert and you were so glad that you agreed to it. He was so good-looking, the luminesce coming from the moon and street lights made his green eyes looked as if they were glowing which made him looked so, do much more attractive.

“Thank you. I mean, I never thought you would go this far just to celebrate my first job.” You took the first words. It was peaceful, not peaceful as in no other sound. There was still sound of cars passing by, the shallow voices from people in the street and the faint sound of music coming from the nearby clubs.

“I had it plan for a while but I didn’t have any free time to carry on with it so I’m like 2 weeks late. I’m sorry.”

“I don’t mind. I really really appreciate it, Charles. Thank you so much.” You stepped closer and placed your hands on his chest and they moved to the rhythm of his breathing. “Let’s give us another chance.”

Charles’s green eyes are now locked on yours but he looked like he needed you to say it again.

“Let’s give us another chance.”

Then you could see the ends of his mouth lifted into a curve, the dimples line that you used trace looking deeper as he pulled you closer by your waist. His eyes studied your face as if he was looking for the sincerity and genuineness to make sure what he heard was indeed real.

“Are you being serious?”

“Yeah! Do you…want to?”

You didn’t know if he nodded to your question or if he even replied to your question but youfelt Charles’s lips on yours and it sent a tingling sensation ran through your body. God, you missed him so much. The kiss was full of gentle urgency, you felt his hand cupped on your face as he deepened the kiss. There was nothing else mattered to you at the moment, there was no fear or worries, no past. You just felt this pure, unconstrained and overwhelming passion that reminded you back that it was him, all this time and it would always be him. The kiss ended only when both of you ran out of breath but instead of pulling away, he leaned his forehead against yours and closed him eyes when you began stroking on his cheek.

“I was scared that if I ever stumbled around you again, you would slip off my fingers and I can’t go through that feeling of having no contact with you, not being able to tell you about my accomplishments or failures all over again. I have been living in a constant terror these past few months it’s frightening—“

“I knew, Charles. I knew. I saw the way you being all restless and fidgeting around me, I saw you scanned my face as if you were seeking for my approval before you could touch me. You slipped off once and you made a mistake but we are all learning, aren’t we? None of us knew exactly what love is, none of us knew how relationship worked but look at us now. It’s okay to make mistakes, I want you to be yourself, be comfortable around me like you always did. We’ll figure things out together and I want you to be with me throughout the journey in my life, in our lives. Promise me that you’ll never push me away, talk to me when things get too hard for you, please?”

“Promise. I love you, doudou. All ways, always.”

And one promise is made out of hope.

﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎

“Hi, Y/N.”

“Hi, Lando!” You squealed in excitement to the phone as soon as he picked it up.

“I’m assuming things go well between you and Charles?” You had texted him last night that you were excited and scared but he had assured you that you had nothing to worry because he knew Charles, and he knew you.

“Yeah! We made up and he was so happy and I was so happy too I cried last night and he almost cried—“

And Lando stayed on the phone, every words you said felt like it was piercing on his heart but hearing your voice, knowing you were triumphantly joyful felt like the wound in his heart healed instantly,

and then he remembered that you were talking about Charles, and he felt his heart bled, again but almost instantly, over and over, the sound of your joyful laugh through the phone healed the wound, again.

Lando knows he will never be him, but you will always be her.

“Perhaps in another life, I could be the first one to teach you about friendships, about relationships, perhaps I could be the first guy to hold your hand, the first guy to kiss you and the first guy to break your heart. Perhaps by then, you would choose me over him.”

ynusername

Liked by charles_leclerc, landonorris and 455,365 others

ynusername Pasta and wine 🍝🍷

username si belleeeee 🥰🥰🥰🥰

username You look unreaaal

username Is that Charles on the last pic?

username It’s him check his story

username Does that mean my fav couple is back 🥹

username I’m no longer a child of a divorceeeeee

username La plus belle ❤️😍

charles_leclerc has added to their story

landoprivate

Liked by 8 others

landoprivate Flowers. This one doesn’t wilt.

kymillman

Liked by 103,554 others

kymillman Guess who’s back in the paddock at the start of the season! Ms, childhood sweetheart!

username I knew it!!

username Charles P1 let’s go!

username sighs she’s so pretty 🥹😔

username MY PARENTS THAT’S MY PARENTS RIGHT THERE

username LOLL to all those people who think she had something with Lando

username first love will always wins

[lightlycareless]

The oneshot we were all expecting!!!!!! Or at least the one I so desperately wanted to write 🥹 I just adore our two little lovebirds in this setting—their first kiss and date ajkhgjkaghjkahgjkahsgjkashkgaskghaj ANYWAYS

warnings: highschool au. naoya is completely evangelized so don't expect his usual shenanigans. he's also somewhat of an obnoxious dork. fluff. also minimal proofreading (?)

Happy reading!!

[I’m almost there!! There was a small delay on the train, but I’m almost there I swear!! I’m sorry, please wait for me 🥺]

Naoya must’ve re-read your last message a thousand times, but far from making him angry, or even easing his anxiety… it just made him feel worse.

As if the seconds he spent waiting for you weren’t agonizing enough, now that he knew you were very close, he couldn’t help but worry about your reaction. If you’d approve of him, his itinerary for the day—

Or most importantly, his appearance.

Up to that point you had only seen him in his everyday boring jujutsu uniform, with a few exceptions of casual attire after class. Never situations where actual effort beyond the bare minimum was placed.

So naturally, he had to go all out on your first date with him.

Was it too much?

Maybe. Though some would argue this… style was expected of him. Expensive, borderline excessive, from head to toe black in brands many could only dream of affording—it was obvious that Naoya had money to spend, and he wanted the whole world to know.

Mostly you. Everyone else he really didn’t care for—he just wanted you to know what he was willing to do and provide for you. Nothing more, nothing less. 

And such was his determination that he almost forgot another important matter, the one that ended up affecting him the most ultimately: his reaction to seeing you all dressed up for the date.

With a black short skirt alongside a beige oversized turtleneck, accompanied by black thighs that sparked something inside him… Naoya simply wanted to scoop you up and gush at your adorableness. He literally didn't think you capable of being any prettier, and yet, here you were, proving him wrong. Just like every day.

“I’m so sorry Naoya, I hope you weren’t waiting for too long!” you breathed, rushing to his side. Even if you had kept him waiting, all those silly trivialities disappeared the moment you stepped into his sight. 

“You didn’t.” he lies, doing his best to contain the blushing mess settling on his face. “I just got here.”

“That’s not true.” You giggle. “You’ve always been punctual!”

Yes, that's true. And when it comes to you he was far worse; in fact, for today he had actually arrived three hours earlier just to make sure that all the places in his itinerary were still available. 

Naoya had reservations anyways, but there’s always some fool...

“The same way you’re always pretty.”

Now it’s your turn to fluster; what a nice way to turn the tables.

“You’re not so bad yourself, boyfriend.”

Naoya smiles; he's been waiting so long to earn that title, and naturally, it's much sweeter than what he imagined.

“You ready to go?” he asks as he takes hold of your hand.

“Yeah!” you nod eagerly, squeezing him back. “Where are we going first? The aquarium?”

“Yes. Unless you’re hungry, princess. If so, we can get a bite.”

“No, I’m not hungry yet. But I guess we could get  something to drink.” You suggest, already looking through your options.

“Whatever you want, and don’t hold back. Remember it’s all on me.” 

Your heart fluttered at his words. 

“Thank you.”

He smiles.

Naoya had previously scoured the area for nothing but the best coffee shops to give you the most amazing experience possible, nothing short of suitable for his little mochi…

Though his efforts would ultimately be for naught, since you’d take him towards a personal selection instead, initially a recommendation from one of your classmates, now your favorite spot. 

But it wasn’t all bad as Naoya feared, in fact, it was much better than he anticipated; the pastries, while peculiar, were surprisingly tasty. Even for someone like him who wasn’t all too fond of sweets. Yet, what he liked the most was the cozy ambiance that set for an… intimate setting.

“You know, you’re awfully cute when you do that.” Naoya murmurs, a sly smile as he places his hand over yours, inching closer to you.

“When I do what?” you ponder curiously.

“Don’t act coy now, you know what I mean.”

“But I���m not… doing anything.” you frown.

“Is that so?” Naoya laughs.

“Don’t tease me…” you murmur. Your poor heart was already on the brink of bursting out of your chest by the happiness of being so close to him brought you—

You almost passed out once he got much, much closer to you, pressing his thumb at the left corner of your lips and wiping the remnants of your delicious tiramisu…

“Oh, Naoya—that’s—!” you covered your face with your hands. “Stop it! You’re just trying to embarrass me…!”

“Hmmm… really? How could I possibly do that?”

“You—you know what I mean! Don’t act like you don’t!”

Well, you’d better get used to this playful side of Naoya if you’re to be his girlfriend, for he doesn’t intend to stop anytime soon—though he briefly manages to stop when in the aquarium.

Yes, even for someone “cool” like him, the aquarium was quite enjoyable by itself, the kind of place he wouldn’t mind returning to later on again…

Especially if he gets to admire you gleefully observing the fishes, gushing at the ones you considered pretty, if not odd, while taking pictures of them.

There’s just… something about seeing you like this that makes his heart feel warmer, tighter, his feelings for you growing stronger the longer he stares at you, eventually leading him to the thought he’s plentifully considered before—but never brave enough to push for it.

But now… considering all this… he believes perhaps, it’s finally time for that.

Nonetheless, he’s yet to traverse his biggest obstacle, which is setting up everything for that to happen— if it was even meant to occur in the first place. 

Just consider this: Naoya is intimidated by the notion of asking you for a picture, hiding his phone as soon as you turn around to face him.

“It’s—It’s nothing.” He stammers, looking away as he promptly shoves his phone down his pocket. “Just wanted to check something—I think I got a message or something...”

“You know… if you want a photo of me all you have to do is ask.” You suggest, moving closer to him and intertwining your arm with his, resting your head into his shoulder. To think that just a few moments ago the roles were reversed… Oh, how you adored Naoya. “Might even throw in a pose or two for my shy boyfriend.”

“I’m not shy.” Naoya frowns.

“No, of course not.” You giggle, standing on your toes and kissing his cheek. “Never.”

Once done with the aquarium, Naoya’s itinerary continued to the nearby mall, where he’d encourage you to buy something nice—or more like force you to do it yourself, since he was set on purchasing whatever he assumed you’d enjoy. So, if you don't want to end up with things you might not like, you better step up— before getting something to eat.

But while most of his plans were made with the purpose of distracting you, he won’t deny that he’s greatly benefiting from them too; because once he set his mind in achieving that today, Naoya turned into nothing less of an anxious mess, constantly wondering what he needed to do to achieve the same thing he’s been dreaming of since he’s set his eyes on you. 

As well as trying to overcome the insecurities that came with it, what could ultimately ruin the small relationship he was starting to build with you.

What if you didn’t want to? What if you accepted this date to get to know more of him, deciding the best way to continue was by taking things even slower?

If so, he’d only ruin everything with his silly request!

But this—this isn’t anything new. A lot of couples have done it many times! And will continue to do so even after the two are no longer around. 

«Don’t you think if this is something she wanted to do,  she would’ve told you already?» Naoya cruelly scolds himself. «If I make this decision myself, I’ll only end up pushing her away—»

“Are you ok, Naoya?” you ask, having noticed how eerily silent he’s become since… a while ago, really. “You haven’t even tasted your ramen”

“Ah, yes— I’m fine.” He responds, wiping the sweat off his hands on his coat before looking at you. “I just remembered there’s an assignment I need to do.”

“Oh, is it urgent? We can head back if you—”

“What? No! Why would you suggest that?!” Naoya gasps, you blink. “I—I mean—I still want to spend more time with you in the city.”

You press your lips together.

“Are you sure it’s nothing? We can always go out another time…”

“No. I want today to be special, it’s our first date, after all.” You blush.

“Alright, I’ll believe you.” You say, smiling. “But only if you eat, if not, we’ll head back to the school!”

Maybe filling his stomach will ease his nerves, an empty stomach was never a good basis to make decisions on. 

And yet, it simply made his uneasiness grow bigger, if not worse—like he could puke at the mere thought of disappointing you, even when you’ve consistently shown how happy you are with all that he’s done for you.

Or so that’s how you wished to feel, because it wouldn’t take long before you noticed Naoya’s… distance. His prolonged silence that begun just after leaving the aquarium—the now bane of your existence—completely different from when the day began.

You didn’t want to take this mishap and use it as fuel for your insecurities, but with nowhere else to go and no answers to obtain, it just happened. You simply… began to think that maybe, he didn’t like you as much as you hoped. 

Perhaps you’ve come off too strong with him back then; or maybe you’re too weird for his liking, you shouldn’t have gotten too comfortable with him too early in the relationship—

Not that it mattered anyway, because you were absolutely sure he was now considering not being with you anymore.

Evidently, the two were going through quite the emotional turmoil; but it wasn’t until you realized that the time to return home was fast approaching that you decided to take the first step and end all confusions once and for all.

If the day was going to end like that, you might as well know why.

“Na—Naoya… did I do something to upset you?”

Naoya immediately blinks, snapped back to reality and startled by your bold accusation.

“No?? Where is this coming from??”

“I—I don’t know, I guess you… well, I just concluded that since you got all silent out of the sudden… it must’ve been because of me.” you quietly explained. “Because I disappointed you.”

“I hope to never hear that from you ever again.” Naoya frowns, his stern reaction making you further embarrassed, avoiding his gaze subsequently. He sighs.  “Lool, Y/N… I didn’t mean it that way.”

“...Just tell me. What did you not like about me? What is something I did?”

“All you’ve ever done is be perfect, so no.”

“Then what is it?” you ask once more. “Is it the assignment you told me?”

“No, that’s not it. Not at all.” Naoya quickly responds.

“Then tell me, please.” you breathe, getting desperate at the lack of answer—for every denial felt as if the knife of his indifference twisted deeper and deeper into your heart. Inching you closer to the possibility of you being the cause of such distaste, he just didn’t want you to make a scene. “If it’s something I did—”

“Seriously, stop it already, Y/N!” Naoya gasps, immediately cupping your face and forcing you to see him. You try your best to avoid his gaze to befall your teary one, but ultimately you fail at his persistence. “What do I need to say to get through that stubborn little head of yours??”

“…The truth, I guess…” you sniffed, there’s no point holding back the tears forming in your eyes anymore if they were already soaking your cheeks. “...What changed?”

Naoya swallows, already feeling like shit by having made you cry—a sight he will never forget, nor will he allow to occur once again by his own merit—worse when his heart just kept pounding loudly and painfully against his chest, a combination of his uncertainty when approaching the topic, and regret for your reaction.

But even then, he wholeheartedly prefers to deal with his embarrassment, than his guilt for having hurt the woman of his dreams.

The faster he mends this, the quicker you’ll be back to the same bubbly girl he fell in love with. Or so, he hopes.

“The truth is… I’ve been thinking about something. About that.” Naoya begins, voice trembling as he looks at you. 

“I don’t… follow.”  you say.

He swallows once more.

“The reason why I’ve been quiet is because I want to do something with you.” He quickly adds, it’s obvious by the way he speaks that he’s very nervous, fearful that you might judge him afterwards. But only if he knew… “I want… to… kiss you.”

“O—Oh!” you gasp, and suddenly, everything seemed to make sense. “Naoya, is that why—”

“Ye—yeah. And I didn't know how to bring it up without making you uncomfortable.” Naoya explains. “That’s the reason why I kept quiet. I… I never meant to upset you.”

“I… I didn’t know you were—”

“I knew it was a stupid idea, I’m moving too fast, aren’t I? You probably haven’t even considering the idea—forget I said anything—”

“No, Naoya, don’t—don’t say that.” you say, pulling his attention back to you. “Because that’s not true.”

“What do you mean?”

“...I guess I mean to say I… I’ve also considered it. I have also been thinking about it, quite often too…” you confess, embarrassed. “I’d be lying if I said otherwise…” 

“Y/N…  you mean to say you also…”

“Y—yeah, I mean… who doesn’t want to kiss their boyfriend any chance they get?” you ask. “I just didn’t bring it up because… well, I wasn't sure if you wanted to.”

“It’s all I’ve been dreaming of.” He reveals as well, your heart quickens once again. “...Did you hope it would happen today?”

“M—Maybe!” you shriek. “It’s not too soon, is it?”

“No, I don’t think so.” Naoya admits. “I think some might even say we’re running late.”

You frown. “Not that it should matter, it’s our relationship. Our decision—and I… choose to wait if you so desire.”

“I don’t want to wait anymore.” you say. “I… I want to kiss you.”

“Then let’s do it—” “But what if you don’t like it?” it’s your time to worry. “I… haven’t kissed anyone else so I don’t know what to do…”

Naoya blinks. Did he hear that right? But far from being inundated with that peculiar rush most got in a situation like this, he was greatly worried about making this a moment you’ll enjoy.

A moment he won’t ruin by his own inexperience.

“Am I to be your first?”

“I mean, I guess if you count that one time when I was 5…”

“I don’t like the thought of that.” Naoya frowns, jealous. You let out a breathy chuckle.

“It was a silly bet, Naoya. Didn’t mean anything.” But you still made the conscious decision to not tell him who it was—if this is how he got at the mere thought of someone else kissing you, you could only imagine what he’d do upon learning it was actually Satoru all along. “Not when I only want you.”

Naoya swallows, his heart skipping a beat.

“Then… what are we waiting for…?”

After a quick debate, the two end up settling for a small, nearby park to finally do what their heart’s desired, into a somewhat secluded eye where no one else would see them obnoxiously (but sweetly) try to kiss each other for the first time, yet intimate enough to persuade them into actually doing so.

Truth be told, the more you and Naoya realized how close you were to actually doing, the more… anxious you felt. To believe you were simply a few moments away from kissing your boyfriend for the first of many times… This might as well be your first kiss!

Might be Naoya’s too.

“N—now what?” you whisper, unsure how to proceed, fidgeting with his fingers.

“I—I guess we kiss.” He swallows, gently squeezing your hands. “Do I just… lean?”

“Ye—yeah.” You nod, cleaning up all the strands of hair that obstructed your face. “And I guess I’ll just… move to you.”

“Ok.” He nods, taking one last deep breath. “Then… let’s do it.”

…

…

…

“You said you would lean down, Naoya.”

“I can’t if you’re staring at me like that!”

“I’m—I’m not staring!” you cry back. “I’m just—I’m just being attentive!”

“Yes you are, you’re looking straight at me with those big eyes of yours!”

“Where am I supposed to look, then?! How am I supposed to know when to move??”

“Not me?? Close your eyes!”

“But what if you bump into me?!”

You’ve unknowingly awoken a fear within Naoya, as if the worry of your approval wasn’t enough.

“I’m not—I’m not going to bump into you.” He frowns. “Why would you even suggest something so silly… Do you know how weird you look staring right at me?”

You frown.

“…You didn’t have to be rude about it…” Naoya immediately regrets the way he spoke to you.

“No, princess, I didn’t mean to upset you.” He says, cupping your face once more. “That was just my nerves talking.”

“…I’m nervous too.”

“I know, I know. But I still want this, more than anything in the world.” Naoya adds. “So please… trust me. I promised to take care of you, didn’t I?”

You smile softly.

“You did.”

“Then just close your eyes and let me do everything else.”

“O—okay…” you nod, sighing before eventually closing your eyes, trying your best to relax and prepare for the fateful moment that would mark the beginning of this beautiful relationship.

Unaware of Naoya’s intent stares; it was almost ironic how he complained about your gaze when he was doing the very same thing now…

But he wasn’t exaggerating when stating he really wanted this. In fact, he probably wanted this much, much more than you. To finally be connected to someone that would appreciate him for who he was, not for what he represented…

Naoya never imagined a moment like this could ever happen with someone like him, like his family and it’s expectations.

Yet, it’s like he summoned you out of his thoughts and now, here you were, materialized before him and ready to give him all the love he deserved—through the adorable pout you were unwittingly doing, awaiting for his kiss, to the way you stood on your toes, your own way to help him out when he eventually leans down. Were you even aware of how adorable you were to him? If not, it just transformed his perception of you into something even lovelier.

«I won’t keep you waiting any longer» Naoya promises as he readjusted his gentle hold of your face, giving you one last smile before finally beginning to lean down towards you. Taking in your scent, your softness, your warmth…

Closing his eyes when just a few millimeters away from your lips, preparing to take in your affection, and then—

He kisses you.

Carefully and sweetly, his world is suddenly filled with color when his lips finally touch your soft ones, the very sensation he always imagined you’d have—no, this was much, much better than all he could conjure up.

It filled a void he’s been desperately craving to satisfy, the need to feel loved, cared for, needed—you gave him all that with just a simple gesture…

How could he not fall more in love with you? His life had become far more thrilling with you in it, and this was only the evidence of such.

And while it ended as a quick kiss, nothing short of inexperienced, found with some hesitance along the way… none of these things mattered in the bigger picture.

To you and Naoya, this was the official declaration of each other’s love, leaning deeper into each other’s embrace once eventually separated.

“S—so…? How—How was it?” you ask, doing your best to push down your heart from coming out your throat as you glanced up to him. “Was—was it… good?”

“Ye—yeah.” Naoya quietly admits, resting his head alongside yours. “It… tasted like ramen.”

“You—stop it! Be serious!” you fret, already a nervous mess when asking for his opinion, his comment simply made it worse!

But naturally, he was only making a slight jest of the moment, his instinctive reaction to trying to ease his jumping heart from bursting out of his chest, as you’d come to notice when placing your ear next to it—it’s the first time you’ve ever heard such quickness coming from him… enough evidence to know he enjoyed it, much to your delight.

“I like it.” he confesses, you smile, leaning deeper into his chest. “It was… much, much better than I expected.”

“I can hear that.” you giggle, hugging him tightly. “... I liked it very much too.”

“Enough to kiss me again?” he teases once more, you blush.

“I don’t know if my poor heart can take it.” you jest back. “My ears are ringing too.”

“Well, you know what they say—the more you keep doing something, the more comfortable you feel with it.” Naoya implicitly suggests.

“Are you saying…”

He nods. “...but only if you want… please.”

You grin.

After such a lovely date, and with so sweetly that he asked…

You had no other option. Not that you’d have many once Naoya grew confident enough to kiss you over and over again later on, if anything, you’d soon find yourself begging him to give you a second to breathe. It would be a miracle if he even gave you a chance to speak in between kisses!

But oh, who are you kidding? Deep within, you knew you enjoyed it, always looking forward to the moment the love of your life would come rushing to steal all your kisses away, you’d probably won’t have any to share by the end of the year!

And you wouldn’t want it any other way.

“By the way, princess. Why didn’t you want me to pick you up? It was nothing, you know? I could’ve easily gone to your house and done so.”

“Well, because I didn’t want to inconvenience you.” you say, he frowns. “I know, you just said it wouldn’t. But I also felt like taking the public transport, I haven’t used it since we got out on holiday.”

“I don’t feel comfortable with you taking the public transport, it’s… unbefitting for someone like you.”

“The public transport isn’t that bad, first of all.” You say, tightly holding his hand as the two headed towards the nearest station, time to head back home unless you wished to deal with an angry father. “...But if you really want to know… I didn’t ask you to pick me up because I didn’t want your motorcycle ruining my outfit.”

“Ruinning your outfit—really? Is that all?” He chuckles. 

“Hey, don’t judge me! And besides, you should know too! You’re quite cautious too, to put it one day.”

“I wasn't going to pick you up with the motorcycle, I have cars too, you know?”

“...A car?” you blink. “You have a car too??”

“Cars. Plural.” Naoya explains proudly. “I just choose whichever matches with what I’m wearing.”

“Naoya, I knew you had money, but that’s just ridiculous!”

“It’s our money now, actually.” He says. “All that is mine is yours; so technically the cars are yours too.”

“No Naoya, oh my god.” you gasp. “I can’t—I can’t accept that! Just what did I get myself into?!”

“Hmmm, I don’t know, I guess the best time of your life?”

You blush.

“That would be one way to put it, I guess.” You frown, making him laugh and subsequently press a kiss on your cheek, on your lips…

“As long as you’re with me, you’ll always have what you need.” He swears, pressing one last kiss on your knuckles. “Whatever you want, I’ll make sure you have it. And I won’t stop at any limit to achieve so.”

Whether he referred to love, or monetary possessions, both guided you to the same conclusion:

“I know.”

NGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH Nothing was ever the same after that point; 🥺 I just... well, I hoped you liked it!! I wanted this to be as sweet and somewhat awkward as possible lol they're teenagers, after all; but not enough to ruin the experience. I hope I managed to convey that 🥹

Luckily I have another version of their first kiss so if you don't particularly enjoy this, there's always another 😏 but i'll get to that one eventually.

Now, take care, and hope you have a wonderful day!!