#supergordon

[drpoisonoaky]

Babs: So what’s for dinner?

Kara: I can’t tell you, it’s a soup-prise!

Babs:

Babs: Is it soup?

Kara: I soup-pose it could be! *winks*

Babs: Please, enough with the soup puns.

Kara: Wow, you’re soup-per mean.

Babs: STOP!

*one hour later*

Babs: It’s fucking tacos?!?!?!

Kara: Never get comfortable around me.

[redrepresents]

#supergordon #porkpie #production #propmaster @thelsproductions

[drpoisonoaky]

Sometimes when you’re in a relationship you forget to tell people…or that’s is a thing that has happened to Kara and Barbara. So as two mature adults they decide that the best option is to try to gaslight everyone. Spoiler: it usually doesn’t work.[Part.1]

———— Stephanie Brown and Cassandra Cain

Babs: Oh today is best if you don’t go on a patrol cause it’s date night and I’m not going to be able to give you back up.

Cass: No problem.

Steph: Wait you have a date? With who?

Babs: With who?

Steph: Yeah Barbara, who do you have a date with?

Babs: With my girlfriend?

Steph: Babs be for real.

Babs: I’m not cheating on my girlfriend. Being a cheater isn’t cool Stephanie.

Steph: WAIT WHAT?! YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?!

Cass, also clueless but rolling with it just to piss off steph: Yeah, it’s not cool Ste-

Steph: I THOUGHT YOU WERE STILL DATING GRAYSON!

Kara, coming in through the window: Are you ready?

Steph: WAIT KARA WHY OMG NO WAY WAIT WHAT.

Kara, whispering: Why is she going crazy?

Babs, also whispering: Did you tell her anything about us?

Kara: No?

Babs: Exactly.

Kara: *Nods*

Kara: Steph, are you saying she’s cheating on me with Grayson? That’s nasty.

Steph: Wait what NO. I don’t know. What?! *looks at Cass* YOU KNEW?!

Cass: *shrugs*

Kara: So m’lady, shall we?

Babs: We shall.

Steph: COME BACK YOU ASSHO-

———— Tim Drake

Tim, coming in the clock tower through the window: Hey Babs. Can you help me?

Kara, with a cup of hot chocolate: Hey Tim. I’m sorry, but Babs is sleeping. So not tonight.

Tim: Oh. Okay.

Tim: Wait what are you doing here?

Kara: Oh, drinking hot chocolate I couldn’t sleep and I didn’t want to wake Babs. You want some?

Tim: But why are you in here…Oh OH.

Tim: SORRY I DIDN’T KNOW NOBODY TELL- SORRY.

Kara: So hot chocolate?

Tim: Sure.

Kara: Nice! So tell me, how’s life?

Tim: For once great. I met someone and…

———— Jason Todd

Jason: Barbara I need to find-

Kara, slightly annoyed: Hello to you too.

Jason: What are you doing here?

Kara: I’m getting quality time in order to have a healthy relationship.

Jason: With who?

Kara: With the only other person in the room before you rudely barge in?

Jason: Barbie?

Kara: Duh.

Jason, looking at them: Ok. I don’t care. Can you help me?

Babs: Sure, tell me.

Kara: Goodbye quality time.

Jason: It would be quicker if you help too Barbie 2.

Kara: AT LEAST PICK AN ADJECTIVE I COULD BE BARBIE ALIEN OR BARBIE MADE OF STEEL

Jason:

Babs: We were watching Barbie.

Jason: It’s a great movie.

Babs: Indeed.

Kara: And you’re ruining it.

Jason:

Jason: Ok. so this dude-

[drpoisonoaky]

Kara: Do you think I should learn how to ride a bike?

Babs: You can fly.

Kara: But you have a bike.

Babs: I can’t fly.

Kara: But what if my powers fail? How would I go anywhere?!

Babs: You just wanna ride my bike to look cool, don’t you?

Kara:

Kara: Fits with the new jacket.

[drpoisonoaky]

Sometimes when you’re in a relationship you forget to tell people…or that’s is a thing that has happened to Kara and Barbara. So as two mature adults they decide that the best option is to try to gaslight everyone. Spoiler: it usually doesn’t work.[Part.2]

———— Dick Grayson

Babs: What kind of jewelry could I buy from someone who flies at supersonic speed?

Dick: Rings.

Babs: Ugh but the fights.

Dick: Mmm… wait why would you- OMG IT’S HAPPENING?!

Babs: I don’t know what you’re talking about.

Dick: Are you asking Kara out?

Babs: I’m asking out…my girlfriend?

Dick: Oh nonono don’t try to gaslight me Barbara. We haven’t talked about this before and you know it. So your girlfriend already? Good job.

Babs, trying to gaslight him: Of course we have talked about it.

Dick: Look try to gaslight me as much as you want but I know you Barbara and you didn’t tell me shit about Kara and you dating, Barbara.

Dick: So you should do it now, Barbara.

Babs: Stop using my full name.

Dick: Sure but go on.

Babs: You know it’s extremely weird that you are so invested in your ex-girlfriend and her new girlfrie-

Dick: My dad dresses up as a bat and beats people every night since I was kid I think we’re good.

Babs: Touché.

———— Bruce and Damian Wayne

Bruce: Supergirl, what’s the matter?

Kara, who was sleeping on the couch: Whut?

Damian: Why are you here?

Kara, still half asleep: Sleep?

Bruce: Here?

Kara: Yes?

Damian: Did you have a rough mission?

Kara: No?

Bruce: Is Barbara in trouble?

Kara: I hope not.

Damian:

Bruce:

Kara:

Babs, under Kara and with her eyes closed: CAN YOU PLEASE SHUT UP I’M TRYING TO SLEEP HERE, SHE’S COZY AND SHE NEEDS TO STAY RIGHT HERE

Damian:

Bruce:

Kara: Can you please come back later? Or tomorrow? It’s bedtime and as you see she needs it.

Bruce: Sure.

Damian: But father we need to-

Bruce: Later, now we have to call Clark.

———— Dinah Lance

Dinah: Hey beautiful what do you have for me?

Babs: Her friend was found dead in an alley so it seems-

Dinah: You know your neck is covered in hickeys like a horny teenager, right?

Babs: *sighs* She never listens.

Dinah: and by she we’re talking about…?

Babs: Kara obviously.

Dinah: Are you trying to pretend I already know this piece of information so I can’t tease you about it?

Babs:

Babs: Is it working?

Dinah: Yes.

Babs: Wait, really?

Dinah: Of course not you asshole. We talk, I tease you. Then you call Kara. Then I tease you both and then you both catch this dude to compensate your shitty move.

Babs: Deal.

Dinah: First things first. Is it because she’s blonde or the muscles...?

[drpoisonoaky]

[Dick and Kara on a “date”]

Dick: And you know Batman can be a real asshole.

Kara: Aha.

Dick: What kind of superhero gives his child sidekick such colorful clothes when he’s the fucking night.

Kara: Right.

Dick: I mean, Batgirl fucking bought her costume at a costume shop and it’s better.

Kara: Wait wait wait.

Dick: I know right. Plus her suit came with pants. Do you know how cold the roofs are at night?

Kara: I don’t know what you were talking about I only get Batgirl. Do you know her like personally?

Dick: Of course.

Kara: How much?

Dick: I dated her?

Kara: WHY DIDN’T YOU SAID THAT SOONER?!

Kara: Tell me everything about her. What she likes, what she doesn’t like, is she single?!

Dick:

Kara: Oh Rao she’s so cool and smart GRAYSON TELL ME EVERYTHING ABOUT HER!!

[Barbara at home]

Babs: *sneeze* Someone’s interrogating someone for information about me.

[drpoisonoaky]

*buying groceries*

Kara: *takes a free sample twice*

Kara: Robbery and Fraud. I am a rebel.

Babs [who’s seen her go apologize and buy whatever that shit was]: No you’re not.

[drpoisonoaky]

Sometimes when you’re in a relationship you forget to tell people…or that’s is a thing that has happened to Kara and Barbara. So as two mature adults they decide that the best option is to try to gaslight everyone. Spoiler: it usually doesn’t work.[Part.3](Sirens’ edition)

———— Pamela Isley aka Poison Ivy

Ivy: Are you lost or something?

Babs: Harsh. I thought at this point we are at least acquaintances.

Ivy: So you want something.

Babs: Your help actually.

Ivy: With what?

Babs: How I say this without offending you…

Babs: Pamela, you are really smart and I know you are a doctor in-

Ivy: Cut the crap Barbara.

Babs: Help me to pick a plant for my girlfriend that she couldn’t kill for over watering or something.

Ivy: Oh you have a girlfriend. Now we can be acquaintances.

Babs: Ivy please.

Ivy: Sure I’ll do it. But tell me who your girlfriend is cause you know my girlfriend would murder me when I tell her this and don’t tell her who she is.

Babs: Is it really necessary?

Ivy: The price to pay, darling.

Babs:

Ivy: I’m waiting.

Babs: Ugh fine. I’m dating supergirl.

Ivy: *starts to laugh*

Babs, confused: What?

Ivy: Why do you need help to pick a plant when your girl is a plant herself.

Babs: What do you mean?! She’s not she’s funny, sma-

Ivy: Not like that. But think about the supers, they get their powers from the sun. Does that ring a bell?

Babs:

Ivy: I gave Harley a ficus when we started dating. They are pretty strong. Here.

Babs: Thanks Ivy.

Ivy: Enjoy your plants.

Babs: You only gave me one?

Ivy:

Babs, completely red: OH I- BYE!

———— Selina Kyle

Selina: So how is it?

Babs: How is what?

Selina: You’re sleeping with a super, right? How. Is. It?

Babs:

Selina: I’m not into them like they are too goodie goodie but I’m curious.

Babs: I-

Selina: Girl of steel, super strength, could fly, x-ray…

Babs, clearly flustered:

Selina: Oh don’t act like a prude babe. We’ve known each other for years.

Babs, whispering: …It’s mind blowing.

Kara, coming into the room: Sorry I’m late.

Selina: And that’s my cue, bye bye girls. My pleasure.

Babs:

Kara: Bye!

Babs:

Kara, whispering: You know I heard everything right?

Kara: Super hearing.

Babs: Don’t you dar-

Kara: MIND BLOWING FELLAS

Babs: I hate you.

Kara: In fact no you don’t. MIND BLOWING

Babs: Ugh.

———— Harley Quinn

Harley: Holy molly whatcha doing in Gotham super blondie?

Kara: Personal business.

Harley: Lemme tell ya, I’m good now like I don’t plan and do evil things anymore.

Kara: Oh don’t worry, I know.

Harley: Phew cause fight you would be a pain in the ass…

Kara: It would be quick.

Harley: Don’t be a prick.

Harley: Btw, how is your personal business related to the bat family?

Kara: Who sa-

Harley: You’re on a rooftop in the middle of the night in Gotham. Cut the crap.

Kara: Personal business.

Harley: Right.

*5 min later*

Kara: So are you going to stay here all night?

Harley: I was here first, go to another roof.

Kara: I can’t.

Harley: Neither do I.

*10 min later*

Kara: I-

Harley: Look if you want me to move my ass to another roof I need context or something and you know it.

Kara: *sigh* I guess there’s no choice. So-

Babs: Hey babe I’m sorry but it took me a long time to find my old suit but look it fit perf-

Babs: Oh hi Harley.

Harley: No freaking way.

Kara: I-

Harley: *running away* Well, take it as a gift for whatever it is you’re celebrating.

Harley: Bye blondie! Bye blondie’s personal business!

Babs: Wha-

Kara: Whao. You really look incredibly.

Babs: I know.

Babs: By the way I have I gift for you.

Kara:

Babs: A different gift, horndog.

[drpoisonoaky]

Babs: What are you having for breakfast, Kara?

Kara: Gay Cheerios.

Dick: Wait what are those?

Babs: *sighs* fruit loops.

Dick: Gimme some.

[drpoisonoaky]

A good psychologist is hard to find especially when you’re a bat-something. So go to Ivy’s house and pay a visit to the best therapist in Gotham: Harley Quinn

---------[Barbara Gordon]

Harley: Hey Babs.

Babs: Hi.

Harley: You’re are late but damn you look happy.

Babs: Guess therapy is really working.

Harley: Mmm.

Babs: Truly.

Harley: I know I’m good but I’m not that good.

Babs: Harley I don’t know what you are assuming.

Harley: I’m not gonna make you talk if you don’t wanna. But I know why somebody got that smile, you know when me and Ives started to you know I worn the brightest smile that any person coul-

Babs: You know Dick and I aren’t together anymore, right?

Harley: Oh I know, he’s in that weird fase of “all of the redheads are evil” so I connected the dots.

Harley: Now he gets exposure therapy every time Pam opens the door.

Harley: But I had a question though.

Babs: What?

Harley: When you have to go to National city do you call her and she fly you or do you go like a regular person. Cause lemme tell ya Ivy loves the first one sooo much not cause is gayer, which I think gives it extra points, but cause is much better for the environment than plains or cars. Well assuming she doesn’t pollute the air cause we nev-

Babs: I don’t know what you are talking about and I’m here for therapy so…

Harley: I see…

Harley: What time is it? Omg I have to water Ivy’s tomatoes and feed the babies.

Harley: I think we should do your session tomorrow or maybe next week cause you know information is really important and it looks like you don’t wanna talk…

Babs: Are you really postponing my therapy session if I don’t tell you about my love life right now?

Harley: Your neck is cover in hickeys, the rogues are literally shitting their pants cause the super blonde is here and I won’t be able to focus if I don’t know the whole story.

Babs [face completely red]:

Harley: Pretty please?

Babs:

Harley:

Ivy [from other room]: Oh c’mon we want to know don’t be a prick.

Ivy: Especially how you go to National city.

---------[Kara Zor-El Danvers]

Kara: Hi?

Ivy: Shit shit shit I promise that thing with superman only happen once. I was young, I was lost, I have power and you know difficult times.

Kara: Is Harley Quinn here?

Ivy: Oh…she’s good now, I promise. Take me instead I’m more evil yesterday I punched an-

Kara: Oh nonono I’m not here as a hero. I’m here for therapy.

Ivy: Oh thank god.

Harley [who has just enter the room]: RED WHO’S THERE I HAVE MY BAT AND A FICUS!

Kara: Oh hey!

Harley: HOLY MOLLY GUACAMOLLY the super blondie.

Kara: I was talking with batgirl the other day and she talked a lot about how you are helping her. So I thought why don’t you tried what’s the worst could happen.

Harley: I- YES YES YES OF COURSE.

Harley: Wait so Babs thinks I’m good?

Kara: DO YOU KNOW HER REAL IDENTITY?!

Harley: I mean yeah, but I don’t need to know yours no biggie.

Harley: also I assume you know hers cause you and her [lace her finger(same way babs did with her to hint that her and ivy are roommates)] just you know wink wink.

Ivy: Do you just said wink wink instead of saying it?

Harley: It’s more organic.

Kara: Oh well yes and yes she is… awesome.

Harley: So no worries blondie and come here it’s therapy time.

[drpoisonoaky]

Kara: *Kicks the door down looking panicked*

Babs: What did you do?

Kara: Nobody died.

Babs: WHAT KIND OF ANSWER IS THAT?!

[drpoisonoaky]

Sometimes when you’re in a relationship you forget to tell people…or that’s is a thing that has happened to Kara and Barbara. So as two mature adults they decide that the best option is to try to gaslight everyone. Spoiler: it usually doesn’t work. [Part.0]

———— Barbara Gordon

Kara: What are you doing?

Babs: Bruce asked me to track this guy. Looks like he’s planning something big.

Kara: Oh.

Kara: So you’re gonna be done soon, right?

Babs: Of course.

Kara: Well now it’s 5pm, so in two hours you should be ready plus a little bit of delay just in case…got it.

Kara: I’ll pick you up at eight.

Babs: What?

Kara: Date night, remember?

Babs, totally red: WHAT WHEN

Kara: Tonight at eight, wear the blue dress, even you are pretty in anything, but the blue dress make your eyes pop, and get ready to get a lot of kisses. See ya! *flies away*

Babs:

Babs: I don’t know if she was oddly smooth or she gaslighted herself into thinking that we were dating…

Babs: Well I guess I have a girlfriend now.

[drpoisonoaky]

Steph: Why don’t we go to that buffet in Burnside? I’m starving.

Babs: It would be great but Kara was banned from there.

Kara: Well, they shouldn’t say “all you can eat” if they don’t mean it.

Babs: Kara, you ate a chair.

[drpoisonoaky]

Steph: I need pickup lines.

Babs: ..Why?

Steph: Let’s say I need ammo.

Kara: OHH MY TIME TO SHINE

Steph: Are you good with pickup lines?

Babs: No, she’s not.

Kara: HEY What do you mean? I’m a pro.

Babs: Kara, darling…

Kara: So, I heard you like bad girls… I time travel in Animal Crossing.

Babs: I don’t actually.

Kara: Thank Rao. Cause it’s a lie, I’ve invested too much in turnips.

Kara: That proves nothing.

Kara: And I made a lot of bells after that.

Babs: Or when you tried a more nerdy approach…

Kara: Are you an F5 key? Because that ass is refreshing.

Babs: Are you a software update? Because not right now.

Steph: That was bad.

Kara: The answer wasn’t really necessary…

Babs: Or do you remember?

Kara: Did you have lucky charms for breakfast? Because you look magically delicious!

Babs: It’s 6:00 am after a patrol I look dead.

Steph: Bad timing.

Kara: But you looked cute!

Babs: Or maybe that one…

Kara: I never need to see the sun again because your eyes light up my world.

Babs: You literally need the sun for your powers you’re like a plant

Kara: OKAY I GET IT!

Babs: But we end up together, so it didn’t matter. I really lo-

Kara: Don’t you dare to be cute I’m sad.

Babs: You can’t have it all sweetie.

Steph: You’re both really cute…

Steph: But this conversation was pointless. Where’s Dinah?

[drpoisonoaky]

Kara: *acting tough* You guys don't want to mess with me. I’m supergirl I’m the girl of stee-

Babs: Yeah, Kara will straight up cry in public. Don't try her.

Kara: Exactly, I will straight up-

Kara:

Kara: *tearing up* Why would you say that?

[drpoisonoaky]

Sometimes supergirl has a random thought that has to be shared with a specific person.

[Thought 1]

[On a rooftop with nightwing looking at some criminals]

Kara: Do you realize you can say “have a nice day” without problems but when you say “enjoy the next 24 hours” sounds threatening.

Nightwing: THE FUCK SHE’S DOING HERE

Babs: and if you use seconds instead of hours sounds even more threatening like “enjoy the next 1440 seconds”.

Kara: Exactly! Well good luck and good night *kiss her in the forehead and flew away*

Dick: I-

Babs: Shh they’re moving.

[Thought 2]

[Inside the clock tower with Steph]

Babs: Steph you have to be more caref-

Kara: A coconut has hair. A coconut has milk. A coconut has flesh. Therefore, a coconut is a mammal.

Steph: WHERE DID SHE CAME FROM?!

Babs: A coconut is a fruit babe.

Steph: THAT’S NORMAL TO YOU?!

Kara: Your logic is no fun but you are pretty so *kiss her in her left cheeck* bye *fly away*

Steph: that wa-

Babs: cause if you aren’t more careful I’m going to call Cass.

Steph: WHY DO YOU CONTINUE LECTURING ME AS IF NOTHING HAS HAPPENED

[Thought 3]

[Inside the clock tower with Dinah]

Dinah: There were like 10 guys at least but she came and fight al-

Kara: Do you realized that poems that don't rhyme are just really weird sentences that make people feel awkward?

Babs: Maybe you can write one and use it instead of fighting.

Kara: Oooh I’m going to do that *kiss her in her temple* see you tomorrow night *flies away*

Dinah:

Babs: and what happened next?

Dinah: I guess birds of a feather flock together.

[Thought 4]

[At the batcave helping Bruce]

Bruce: I’m trying to enter but-

Kara: Do you realise your lap only exists when you sit down? When you stand up its not a lap anymore.

Babs: That’s a good one.

Kara: The accessibility of this place is awful btw.

Bruce: Are you done?

Kara: Geez you didn’t even flinch.

Bruce: I’m part of the justice league. They always show up like that.

Kara: …okay I guess. Well *kiss babs on the nose* see ya!

Bruce: as I was saying-

[Thought 5]

Riddle: Riddle me this Wh-

Kara: Pizzas are circles cut into triangles put into squares. It feels over geometric.

Riddle: shit shit shit I cannot win a super-

Babs: Mmm now i’m kinda hungry. Can you hit him to end this sooner so we can get some pizza?

Kara: Your treat?

Babs: Of course.

[Thought 6]

[With Harley on a rooftop]

Harley: And then this guy came-

Kara: I bet the person that invented popcorn must have been really surprised.

Harley: FUCK YOU YOU NEARLY KILL ME YOU S-

Babs: I hope they didn’t have any cardiac pathologies.

Kara: Right? I’m gonna get some *kiss babs on the top of her head* bye!

Harley: Men I love popcorns.

Babs: So…

Harley: I’m sorry bratgirl but I don’t remember what I was telling you before the blondie.

[Thought 7]

[On the clock tower with cass]

Babs: When will you perform? I want to see you again, I miss watching you dance.

Kara: Someone could be stopping time, then unstopping it, and we wouldn't know.

Babs: I think that violates every law of physics.

Cass: They have to feel quite alone.

Kara: True. My powers are better. *kiss babs in her right cheek* Nice to see you Cass!

Cass: She’s nice.

Cass: In two weeks.

Babs: I’ll be there.

[Thought 0]

Kara: Babs, can I ask you something?

Babs: Always.

Kara: Can I fly wherever you are every time I have like a stupid thought and tell you and then go back?

Babs: Like a message.

Kara: Well yeah but faster and forcing you to read it.

Babs: mmm

Kara: A random thought, a kiss, and scaring the hell out of whoever you are at the time, what do you say?

Babs: If you do it more than 15 times in a week, the dinner on date night is on you.

Kara: Deal!