#suddenly this isnt a safe space anymore
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glamorous-glisten ¡ 29 days ago
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You look like me when I take 17 benadryl and start seeing the hat man.
...What
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wizzy35925 ¡ 1 year ago
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i eouldnlike to sincerely apologize… *holds gun to my head* …for makign a distateful ioke about literal murderer ocs *cocks gun*…. it won’t happen againZzz… *shoots self*
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thisisntmaple ¡ 1 year ago
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baby i explore your breasts like steamapps common
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mare-sanguis ¡ 2 months ago
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The queercoding in Sangcheol's and Jeongwoo's relationship
Let me preface this by saying: everyone is still allowed to see them as whatever they want (a work related relationship, best friends, close friends, soulmates, lovers, and and and) but I think most (if not all at least here on tumblr) can agree it would be ignorant if we completely overshadow just how much queerness there is.
This analysis is brough to you by this thread (why JW is snow white and why SC is the prince) and @thedevildeer latest post. Its not structured and really just a ramble so excuse me if it might sound a little confusing at some points.
Let's start by looking at it through a heteronormative kdrama lense below the cut 
How often do most kdrama fans watch a drama, see the lead man and the lead woman and think "woah, they would look so hot as a couple" even when the drama isn't a romance? Quite often, that's right. That's because most M/F leads are designed to be shipped even outside of the stereotypical romance genre. If it's a crime drama, thriller, mystery etc. Where the focus should solely lie on the plot they will still most likely try to create an M/F duo so most kdrama fans will have something to latch into. It has happened so many times that people dropped a non romance drama because it had no M/F couple, but people apparently want it so badly because how else can they enjoy a non romance drama, right? And kdrama directors/writers know this- they see and read the reviews and work with them; That's why in kdrama land M/F ships are still the norm, still seen as the most canon- even if there is a 2nd ML who has insane chemistry with the 1st ML (perhaps even more than the FL, cuz let's also face it in a lot of kdramas women are written flat)
When the ML is near the FL, everyone immediately interprets all kinds of thoughts into it, even worse when they go as far as to look at each other and hold eye contact, when they worry about each other, support each other, visit each other or are just having a work related conversation. They dont need to confess their love or kiss for the viewer to know they are in love*
Those are all valid points for shipping, that's obivously not the issue- The issue starts when they genuinely can't see the FL as her own character, when they can't seem to understand that men and women can be platonic friends, the issue continues when the 2nd ML appears whos got way more chemistry with the 1st ML or even takes the place of where the FL should be. Its then where the issue peaks- their relationship will automatically treated differently (2nd ML get potentially hated by the M/F shippers even) and it creates rift within the fandom, its shipping and arguments about queerness as a whole (discrediting that queerness is a large spectrum) by cishet fans
Suddenly, if it's M/M those actions I mentioned earlier dont seem romantic anymore, suddenly it's just a simple bromance (and while the term per se isnt homophobic, in these circumstances it sure sounds like it which is why I personally dont like it and rarely use it), best friends caring about each other because homies are homies. ("why can't men stay friends?" we all know that argument) *if they don't confess to each other outright, don't kiss each other, then they aren't i love (last part especially is targeted towards specific BL fans who only think a relationship is valed if they kiss and maje out)
So, this out the way let take a look at SC, JW, HS and BO approach (intentionally or not) on queercoding and the importance of a strong man-woman friendship.
First, let's look at tropes commonly (but not exclusively) found in queer media or media that tries to imply queerness and the similarities they share with SCJW:
Found family (the most common trope in queer media, especially the media that emphasises on realness, as found family serves as a safe space for queer characters when they arent accepted at home)
A strong opposite gender friendship or a friendship that defies traditional views
Color coding (mostly a warm and a cold colour, often times its blue and red)
Language coding (do the characters say they are queer, do they use specific terms, do they confess or declare their love for each other through something deeper; just what are they saying?)
The character design (this is not just about how they look but the desgin as a whole: background story, family, friendships, career, driving force, are they representing something (like a specific color, a flower); what was the creators thought process while creating them)
How do they express love around the person they ador (for example, men express love with touches while women often times use words and actions)
Broken friendships (because old friends dont accept)
Then of course we have common tropes found in all media highlighting love
Clothes sharing
Intense eye contact
Personal space
Lingering
Caring
Hurt/Comfort
Touches
And what do we have here? That's right. Black out s well as SC, JW and HS fit right into the common tropes and the queercoding tropes and yet we see some totally discrediting its validity to exist within the universe because god forbid both JW and SC are queer or viewed as such cuz they both were with women prior and they can't possibly be one of them queers... right?
HS is a really well written female character who's got nuances, a great backstory with a fair share of suffering and the additional nosiness which makes her so special. She is sweet and caring to everyone who seems nice in her eyes. She cares about JW's mother (prior to knowng he's JW's mother so thers no point in saying she does it cuz of JW), cares about Suoh and is genuinely interested in his hobbies. Her character takes care of everyone because she's a med student (you can take a med's job away, but you can never take the job out of a med). This is what her character is about- taking care, worrying. Her purpose in Mucheon was (as we know by ep.13) to find what shes looking for, to find her way back. She is by no means not connected to eithe JW and SC but her story is canonically detached from both JW's and SC's- it takes part in a different pace, in a different setting and through a different lense and most of it happens off screen or throug her observig the people. We rarely get any of her POV's, unless it's either around Suoh or Geonoh. The other times when we do get a POV of her is when SC and JW and in the same frame. Then she is postitioned as the onlooker, the one who observes. When she is alone with JW she gets almost no POV, even less that focuses on her feelings towards him. But the most important thing I said already: her story is detached from SCJW. She grows alone unlike SCJW who grow together. She is that friendship JW needed to show him a part of humanity that got lost with his fake friends. She is to represent and tell that you do not need a large group of friends to feel at home. 
Then there is JW. Beautifully written full of nuances, a tragic yet amazing written backstory- easily to read as a story of someone being queer. A big group of friends, a beautiful home with loving parents and then you got the catalysator which sets the whole plot moving. While for JW it's murder, abuse, gaslighting by friends and people he thought were family, prison and finding new hope in humanity through one person- how can one not look at this and think "yeah it's somewhat reminiscent of someone coming out in a conservative country with traditional family values"? Family and friends ditching before the person can even stand up for themselves, people spreading venomous lies, all the guilt trips, that person shutting themselfs off retreating into their own little world. JW was obviously never meant to be read as such and some even might find this part weird, but it's undeniable he has those classic queercoding tropes. He finds true meaning in humanity again through HS and SC at the same time, yes, but it is SC alone who stands by his side the whole time- every single day. JW feels the safest around SC, falls asleep in his home (therefore also in his presence) and gives in to being taken care of only when SC is around, he also laughs at his dumbs jokes and makes sure to catch his reactions when he is sassy (handing out flyers scene or the scene at the scrapyard). JW is meant to not grow alone but together with someone else- and that someone is SC. who he shares the exact same pain with. He sees the good in people- he sees the good in SC so he keeps on pursuing him even when he would reject him. Because he can see himself in him. Because he feels he's different- just like him. (And isnt it like: Queer people know someone is queer when they see one?). We cannot forget him being a metaphor for Snow White which imo solidifies the queercoding in him even more and how he steps in to save SC and then again to support him by beating up those debt collectors. (Also, just a random little side note: I think it's funny how he's either loved or hated, there was no inbetween. BM and MS hated him, they were eaten up by jealousy; BY, NG, DE and the twins loved him (also again, random side note to me any anyone who cares: it's so easy to read the feelings GO felt towards JW prior and post time skip as more than just friendship tbh which again, adds to the queerness layer))
And then there is SC, just as complex and full of nuances like JW. Having an almost identical tragic backstory to hm even- losing the love of his life. While hes story is way more difficult to decipher as queercoding, his character is most definitely not. He is portrayed as rude and rough towards any criminal and at the beginning of the story we genuienly dont know where we stand with him with this ever fluxuating personality. He is hurt, struggles, doesn't even seem to know himself very well, has seen a lot and he also doesnt trust anyone (as seen when he immediately clocks BM as suspicious when the review the CCTV footage) except JW. How come he trusts him more, even after he had accused him of the hit and run accident, but is side eying everyone the moment the incident with the mother happens? When he should have more trust in his own people then defending and caring for a guy whos accused him of causing the car accident. Even when he finds out JW apparently killed the girls, his actions towards him are differet than the actions we see him taking against the guy he chases after in the beginning. We see him falter and struggle even more in the manhole when he's threatening to shoot JW, we see it again when they are at the shed and JW is reinacting the murder scene- he is reluctant. Even when using violence against JW. Because, just like him, SC feels they are the same. And it doesn't even take much time for him to switch side- we can see him questioning everything onwards from from episode 4 during their first team dinner. And when he switches side he suddenly becomes so soft and caring- completely taking on the role of a possible love interest in both drama, romance and fairytale. Because he has seen the good in JW, saw the same suffering, this unfair treatment. He is a character not meant to grow alone but together and this togethes is only JW. JW still has HS by his side but in SC's world there was only JW who shows him all aspects of what it means to be a good human being. It's through him he grows. 
Their shared journey:
To quote Leo Buscaglia again "Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around."
And isn't this what SC's and JW's shared bond is about? How they grow with and around each other- thanks to each other.
The little things SC does to make JW more comfortable, to show him love still exists? He takes him home without thinking twice because he's worried he might get sick when he could've taken him back to his house. He dresses him up in his clothes, let him sleep on his couch, in his blankets, gives him something warm to eat and drink (the glass of milk will never stop making me sob), showers him in touches and shows him warmth through them, always reaching after him because he's afraid something might happen to him, watches out for him, observes his reactions and waits for him. The little things JW does to SC- giving him a reality check that not everything is as it seems, graduately bringing back his old personality, stays by his side.
It's how SC brings JW's smile back and how JW brings SC's smile back. Its how SC not once but twice declares his worries, adoration and love towards JW: once when he's so worried sick JW might get hurt so he installs that app on his phone and the second time when they say their "goodbyes"- those words are so easy to read, so full of love. The "if you move" highlighting just how much he wants and hopes JW to stay in his life a little longer. It's longing and we can clearly hear it in his voice when he says "I'm sure you can" right after the monologue and then tilts his head. It's how JW doesn't know how to approach him after this, contemplating what to do and then goes on for the hug first. This is JW's way of showing his love. 
And yet, despite it all there are still people who only see it as a bromance. Those who think JW and HS will end up together because they are at the same uni, study the same. And are a man and a woman. If either SC or JW would be a woman, no one would even bat an eye to think they aren't in love- no one would even come up with the idea to even ship JW and HS. If one of them was a woman, every little gesture would be seen as romantic, betting on it the drama would perhaps even be a lot more popular as well as the ship. It's so disheartening to see how many deny an obvious queercoding between them just because they are men and for the sake of a straight, not well manouvred, ship because again apparenlty many kdrama fans don't dare to ship queer.
We know Black Out/Snow white must die is a fairytale because it very much is just one of many iterations of a snow white and exactly because is one of many nothing is impossible and queerness is allowed to exist within it.
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melrosing ¡ 1 year ago
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what do u think of brienne and selwyn’s relationship? idk like brienne obviously loves him. whenever she thinks of her safe space its always tarth and her dad but at the same it seems one of her deepest insecurities is not being enough for him and part of the reason she goes on her escapades is like in a way running away from facing him and her responsibilities as heir. also i think its strange that he lets her: a girl who is unmarried run around being a female knight. like its in good faith i believe lol but this is westeros isnt he worried? i cant imagine how he felt learning about the ransom and vargo hoat. i also think its interesting bc she seems sure he’ll have another kid and put her aside. also do u believe they reunite or that hes dead? i want them to reunite badly.
answered this a couple years ago here and I'd say my thoughts on their relationship remain roughly the same! this may be headcanon territory, but I imagine their emotional distance as being a symptom of grief on Selwyn's part, like he wants the best for his daughter but he moves through life just kind of numb to all that takes place around him, including her suffering; he just doesn't have it in him to engage anymore. that's my hc for why he has never remarried, never tried for more children, etc.
I picture Brienne's peril in ASOS waking him from that though, and that he's been worried for her all this time :( I would like them to meet again but I'm in two minds about it. can see GRRM fridging Selwyn for Brienne's girl pain; alternately, can imagine Selwyn teaming up with team Aegon if it's true there's a Targaryen in Tarth's recent family tree. and finally, I do just really like the idea of Brienne meeting her father again one day in just like some beautiful silent reunion :'( Selwyn going 'actually btw i AM proud of you' would be a bit too on-the-nose but I would like her to be able to read it on his face bc suddenly it feels like he's looking directly at her for the first time since they lost Galladon etc and he is smiling!! wah.
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dippyface ¡ 24 days ago
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he can be both. stupid bitches aren't allowed to lock in anymore?
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THIS ISNT A SAFE SPACE SUDDENLY
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slutcore-starships ¡ 1 year ago
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WHY ARE YOU UP AT 5AM BESTIE GO TO BEDDDDDD
OH SUDDENLY THIS ISNT A SAFE SPACE ANYMORE
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athousandsuns2010 ¡ 2 years ago
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bitches will call themselves delulu and its all fun and games but when i talk about The Cameras suddenly this isnt a safe space anymore
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kurikive ¡ 2 years ago
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i will add that to my potential blackmail catalog
HELLO??!#(*+ BLACKMAIL WHAT????3+#+ 😨😨😨😨 SUDDENLY THIS ISNT A SAFE SPACE ANYMORE
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jynxiejinx ¡ 5 months ago
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When the gang finds out you boinked your mindflayer guardian and SUDDENLY THIS ISNT A SAFE SPACE FOR SHARING ANYMORE
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POV: You’re being cringe at camp
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tedhaternumber1 ¡ 2 years ago
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Tap:you ever get so tired you start seeing spiders?
P:me after I take 17 benadryl and start seeing the hat man
Tap:the fucking who.
P:OHH SO SUDDENLY THIS ISNT A SAFE SPACE ANYMORE.
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cynettic ¡ 3 years ago
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His Experiment
Summary - There was no escape from an alchemist who wasnt finished his study, scrutinizing eyes keeping watch over you as he patiently awaited for results. What he did with the experiments he’d finished getting the results from, you knew not of. Only the wry hope that he would hurry and dispose of you.
Pairings - Reader x Yan!Albedo
Warnings - Yandere-ish behaviour, slightly suggestive, angst
A/N - I’m going to be posting this later, but its 3am and I just really wanted to write some angst for Albedo. Like I love him, but this is necessary luv <3
“This isnt love Albedo… this isnt love.”
The dim room felt suffocating, the candle on your bedside flickering with the intensity that pressed between you both. Backside pressed against the cool surface of the wall, breathing ragged and bound in the enclosed space.
Albedo across the room from you paced. His footsteps were silent on the carpet floor, hands laced behind his back as he did so. It was too dark to see what was written on his face, but you knew without a doubt that it was void of emotion. Distant, far away, too far away. You couldn’t reach him anymore, couldn’t cradle the length of his jaw and hold him close. 
“This…” Albedo spoke up, tone soft. “This isnt love?”
It was hard to swallow, forcing down the bile that rose at your throat. The sickening bitter taste that clung to your tongue. “No,” you replied hoarsely. “This is not love. This is not what love feels like.”
He hesitated, you spotted the abrupt change in his pace when he paused. Pensive stare as he slowly turned his face to angle at you, the candles gentle light giving you a good enough look. His lips were pressed into a firm line, eyes gazing down at you, face posed like a statue. He didnt blink, an unmoving figure that stared only at you, as if you were another puzzle he had to figure out. “Why?”
You almost wanted to laugh.
“Why?” You repeated, harsh with your words as you leaned forward. “‘Why?’ Have you seen me Albedo?” You wanted to move your hands, but the tight rope that bound them behind your back prohibited you from doing so. You clenched your teeth, frustration building at your eyes, tears brimming. “Take a good look at me,” you spat out. “A ‘good’ look Albedo, tell me what you see.”
“You,” he merely whispered back. “I see you.”
You flexed your wrists, testing your mobility, testing your ‘patience.’ “You see more than me. Do not spare me the details, I want to know exactly how you see me.”
Emotionless, he answered. “I see you,” he repeated. “I see your eyes, you’re angry. But its not about our conversation… no, you’re angry with me. You’ve been biting your lips, you do that when you’re anxiety stricken. The way you shift your knees around, you’re nervous, but the sight itself is arousing.” He rubbed the back of his neck absentmindedly, these observations were nothing unique, no he was stating things he noticed, kept track of. “You’ve been sitting their for only a few minutes, but you’re already leaning from side to side, you’re growing numb. Also been trying to get out of the restraints on your wrists, are you cold dear? There are goosebumps along your arm.”
This didnt come as a surprise, though the accuracy of his observations was the cause of the cold feeling crawling up your arms. Up the curve of your spine and along your neck. Just until you were paralyzed, fear held you in place. “I’ll ask again Albedo,” you simply said in a repetitive, robotic voice. “What do you see?” When he didnt answer, you elaborated. “Friend, lover?”
He didnt answer.
He didnt ‘need’ to answer.
No no, you’d settled on a conclusion yourself. Drunk on his silence and obscure answers, you rose to your feet, the numb sensation itching your toes. Rage, you felt ice cold rage jolt through your veins. “Im not an experiment Albedo,” you seethed, again pulling at the rope on your wrists. 
“Experiment?” He took a step towards you, drawing out each second that he did. “I love you do I not?” You took a step back.
“You call this love? Locking me away and keeping me ‘safe’. Is that not what you do when you store your viles in the cabinet to test later? Taking care of them?”
“But I love you,” he persisted. “I obsess over my experiments for a short amount of time, that is not love.”
And was this not an obsession?
You were done with trying to get these common ideals through his head. Instead you stomped towards him, until you were mere inches from his face did you say, “Not because you love me, means that I feel loved.” You wanted to press a hand to your chest, struck by the reminder again that you were bound. Again, tears threatened to spill. You were so ‘angry,’ not wanting to cry to give him the satisfaction of another reaction to analyze. Archons, this was so frustrating.
But instead it was the cool feel of his fingertips against your jaw, gentle with his touch. “Its alright to cry,” he soothingly whispered, holding your face in place when you tried to move away. You despised the way his thumb gently ran across your cheek, face pressing close to give you a kiss on your forehead. “You must be tired, lets get you ready for bed.”
His other hand looped around your waist and suddenly you were trapped in his embrace, strong hands pulling you to the shower and out. Palms keeping you in place as he dressed you and did as he saw fit. As he tucked you into bed and pulled the covers over your form, wrists still tied.
Only then in bed did you let yourself cry.
Fat tears rolling down your plush cheeks, eyes burning when you finally let yourself release all these raw feelings. There was no escape from an alchemist who wasnt finished his study, scrutinizing eyes keeping watch over you as he patiently awaited for results. What he did with the experiments he’d finished getting the results from, you knew not of. Only the wry hope that he would hurry and abandon something that held no use to him.
At your sobs, Albedo pressed you close to his chest. Arms gentle when holding you, fingertips playing with the roots of your hair. He was so good at this, knew just the motions to get you calm, the words to have you breathless. You didnt miss the way his finger slid against your wrist, feeling for your heartbeat, his breath slowly following the rhythmic pattern of your pulse.
His experiment.
Tucked in his arms, you could only hope he found his results soon.
Even if it meant disposing of you.
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alanabloomluvr ¡ 5 months ago
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suddenly this ISNT a safe space anymore.
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been watchinf hannibal lately and i cant stop thinking about this
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livingalifeofasimp ¡ 4 years ago
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Yandere Childe x Reader (Modern Mafia au)
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✧You were in your room sitting in king size bed that was decorated with all kind of furniture and luxurious accessories perfectly organized and red carpets around, when suddenly you heard someone knocked on the door stating that Chide wanted your presence unwilling you opened the door and made your way with them because if you haven't, they won't go and keep pestering, pleading you to come them other wise they would be dead, you were snapped out of your thoughts when you saw they were taking you to basement, you stopped not knowing what his head was planning, no one can ever know what he will do, what if you are going to get punished ? for disobeying him, being rude to him or ignoring him,what if he is going to kill you? One of the bodyguard said " Miss __________ please don't not keep him waiting ", he is right you shouldn't .
✧Entering the chandelier golden  decorated corridor you saw many armed bodyguards more than he retailed to guard you, if you tried to escape you were sure that you would be dragged by them infront of Childe, you heard a voice roared loudy at someone " You cannot take __________ away from me ", no doubt it was Childe screaming at someone but who is it ? You definitely needed to know, fastening your pace you opened the gate and saw your scared friends surrounded by black suited guards pointed their guns towards them, you don't care, after seeing them you can't hold back,you runed towards them crying only to be yanked back by Childe by your wrist crashing on his toned chest " Babe you here, I have been waiting forever you know " pouting at you, is this really what he wants to do right now but you kept trying to free your wrist from his possessive grip. 
✧"____________ you know they  trespassed our paradise and came here they deserve dead ", he said while looking down at them, it's the time that you finally realized that he will kill them, " Childe stop, I am here with you I am not going anywhere so release them ", he put his face at the crook of your neck smelling your sent "Babe I know you will be here with me, even if you want to go I won't let you, but these worthless people want to take you away from me", you can clearly hear him hissing at the end bitterly while looking at them. "YOU ARE INSANE _____________ DON'T WANT TO BE WITH YOU CAN'T YOU SEE IT LEAVE HER ALONE AND LET US GO" ,your friend shouted at him, they were so bold and loved you that they were able to stand up for you, it can't be helped you were crying more. " _____________ sweetheart you need to close your eyes or you can go outside and wait I need to give them their reward for having the courage to yell at me ",Childe said while smiling at you, " Please let them go they won't come back, please hear me out th-this is what I want, let them go they will never come back" you begged him, your eyes spilling tears  but it seemed like he was not going to buy it.
✧"No they want to take you away they die, everyone can so they will ", smirking like a maniac "Kill them " , he said giving them a death glare, guards started to pull their hair and made them kneel, their struggle, everything was in vain "No Childe you can't do this , stop them please", he stopped and looked at you, smiling again something was telling you that he isnt planning what you want " You are right they can't kill them, i should kill them with my bare hands perfect", his words hitted you like a truck, even if you can't see them at least they will be safe. Childe pulled the trigger, guards clearing up the space for him, this can't be true you needed to do something, it's stupid you tried everything he won't stop right now,the finally thing that was left to do is to kiss him, you pressed your lips against his soft pink lips holding his cheeks, it startled him however he let you kiss him enjoy your submissive behavior, if things like this can make you come to him then he do it everyday so that you would come to him willingly. Please stop, please stop is what you receipted in your prayers, by know he must have known you are kissing him to stop from killing your friends. 
✧Childe shooted at the ceiling which made you part from him, he immediately put his hands around your waist grinning like a kid. "____________ that's not how we are supposed to kiss, I should teach you tonight" picking you up in bridal style making his way towards your shared bedroom. Childe turned death glaring your friends " Throw them out ", turning towards you "Are you happy sweetheart? ", you nodded looking at your friends last time, you can't let any one die anymore because of you the guilt will kill you, at least they will be safe.
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comfyswitcherblanketfort ¡ 4 years ago
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Silent Treatment
I was really vibing with both of these prompts today so I combined them 🤷‍♀️? I hope y’all Nonies are okay with it? It’s not exact but I think it captures the vibe? I hope?
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Warnings: we got mommy issues up in this bitch, on both sides, abandonment, controlling/narcissistic parents, definition of ‘hurt’ isnt explicitly mentioned but is used mainly in the emotional sense, first fight, established geraskier relationship, it ends soft i promise
_______________
Jaskier was surprised by this new side of Geralt every day. He was gentler, attentive, sweet, and even verbally appreciative of Jaskier and the little things he would do. A lot of things were making more sense to Jaskier now that he was seeing Geralt express himself. 
The grunts, for example, were less of a disinterested placation and more of a way to respond without showing his hand. And now that he had no cards to hide, Geralt's grunts and sideways looks were few and far between. They’d been replaced with soft smiles and little murmurs of ‘you’re cute’ and ‘your eyes are very pretty in the morning’. 
Jaskier was constantly on his toes, not in a bad way, just - adjusting. Geralt seemed to drop his walls rather quickly, though that might have been because Jaskier started their relationship off with a big ole’ “I love you and would rather die than take another lover if it upset you.” Surprisingly, Jaskier was having a hard time keeping up. It wasn’t that he didn’t enjoy it, he just wasn’t prepared to be the one knocked on their ass from a nonchalant compliment. 
He started to loosen up a month or so in. Making jokes again, doting on Geralt in turn, and becoming just as comfortable with their newfound openness. 
Though it wasn’t long before he put his foot in his mouth. They were taking a bath together when he did, Geralt leaning back against his chest as they shared stories of sneaking out in their youth.
“...and then my mother, had the gal to tell me she just ‘wanted the best’ for me. As if putting a seven year old under house arrest for wanting sweets is in any way good for a child? Sometimes I envy you, dear. My mother was a terrible woman. I think I’d have been better off without her. I know my father would have.” 
Geralt had stopped scrubbing at the gunk on his arm and frowned at the wall. 
Jaskier felt his stomach drop as soon as Geralt’s muscles tensed. 
“No you don’t,” he murmured.
“I-” He almost started defending his position, which he had grounds to. His mother was a tyrant and a narcissist who bent everyone to her will and slandered those who wouldn’t bow until they fled. But he knew what he’d said. Geralt had never outright said he missed the good parts of his mother, but Jaskier heard it in all the little bits of stories he had dropped over the years. How he’d wonder what his mother would have thought of what he’d become, who he loved, the causes he’d fought for. Jaskier was all too aware he’d fucked up as he lightly rested his hands over Geralt’s hips, “Darling I didn’t mean it…”
Geralt rocked forward and stood abruptly, water making a sickening slapping sound when it hit the floor as he quickly stepped out, “You had someone to protect you. Even if she was wrong, she still fed you and kept you safe.”
“Protect me?” Jaskier knew he should shut up, a voice in his head was begging him to, but alas, he couldn’t have stopped if he wanted to, “She did what she had to to keep up appearances. Don’t think for a second she protected me.”
Geralt glared at him as he toweled off, “She kept you.”
“Until I no longer worshiped her! I was out on my ass at sixteen for questioning her at the family dinner table!”
Geralt pursed his lips and set his face in a stony mask of indifference, “Okay.”
“Okay?” Jaskier felt a chill, even in the hot bath, at the look on Geralt’s face.
He simply shrugged and dressed for bed, leaving Jaskier to marinade in his stupidity. 
Of course Geralt would see having any type of mother as idyllic compared to his childhood. But there was still a righteous anger burning in Jaskier’s gut as he crossed his arms and sunk into the water up to his nose. Just because it hadn’t been as bad as Geralt’s childhood didn’t mean the things Jaskier had to grapple with were fading any faster. The fact didn’t suddenly absolve Jaskier of the baggage he carried, nor mend his broken relationship. And logically, it wasn’t meant to, but Jaskier was having a hard time seeing anything but red. 
When he got out and went to bed, Geralt was already asleep, or pretending to sleep. Either way Jaskier was too angry to call his bluff and settled down to sleep without nuzzling into his chest. 
In the morning, Geralt was already up and packing, only humming in response when Jaskier said good morning. Jaskier tried to make light conversation, to loosen Geralt up even a little, but it was met with grunts and silence. 
If he’d thought the newfound praise and range of facial expressions were a surprise, this was whiplash. It was like being thrown back a decade, when he’d first decided to stick to Geralt like tar, before he would even call Jaskier by name. He did his best to give Geralt space, but he missed their banter and how Geralt had started holding Jaskier’s hand as they walked. Part of him wanted to lay into him, tear him a new one for telling him how to feel about his mother, but another part of him wanted to wrap around him and apologize profusely, both in words and gentle kisses. Even more than either of those, though, was the sinkhole of guilt in his chest over flippantly hitting Geralt right where it hurt most. 
Finally, Jaskier couldn’t take it anymore. 
They were sitting across the fire from each other, Geralt pointedly not looking at him as the sun sank below the trees. 
“Geralt?”
“Hm.”
Jaskier took a slow breath before he continued, having told himself all day to keep his head on straight when he said his piece, “It’s not okay.”
Geralt just frowned at him. 
“It’s not okay for me to treat something that hurt you so lightly,” he clarified, catching the slight upward twitch of his lover’s brow, “I don’t need to be thankful for someone who hurt me, either. But, I reacted poorly. I’m sorry for snapping. And upsetting you.”
Geralt set another branch into the fire, his eyes narrowed as he thought, “I didn’t… hm…” he frowned and chewed at his chapped lips as he pieced his words together, “I didn’t think she hurt you. I thought you were… griping about a strict rule.”
Jaskier breathed a sigh of relief at getting full sentence responses, “To be fair, I was. And putting my foot in my mouth.” 
The corner of Geralt’s lips twitched up as he shook his head, “I’m sorry I shut down.”
“All’s forgiven,” Jaskier smiled, “I’m sorry I-”
“I know. Come here.” Geralt interrupted, holding a hand out to Jaskier as if to hold it over the fire. Jaskier took up residence across his lap instead, wrapping an arm around Geralt’s neck and laying his cheek on his shoulder, pressing his other palm to Geralt’s chest. Geralt held him securely in place and pressed a kiss to his forehead as he gently swayed, setting a soothing rhythm. 
“I missed you today,” Jaskier whispered, not wanting to break the spell of calm over their little campsite. 
“Don’t worry, I still thought you were cute.” Geralt chuckled, the low rumble under Jaskier’s palm soothing what was left of his worry. 
“Oh good!” Jaskier chirped, loading his words with an extra helping of sarcasm, “Now I’ve had a taste of your honey-sweet words, I might never be able to live without them!”
Geralt cracked a grin as he ran a hand through Jaskier’s silky, fine hair, “We can’t have that.”
“Of course not,” Jaskier giggled, more from the giddy feeling of a lifted weight from his chest than their banter as he lifted his head to look down at Geralt.
The witcher pulled him in for a soft kiss, after all, Geralt was still Geralt. Actions would always come easier than words for him. 
“I love you.” he sighed as their lips parted, only pulling away far enough to get a breath.
“I love you, too.” Jaskier grinned into the next kiss, holding Geralt close for the rest of the night. 
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chocojjk ¡ 4 years ago
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date scenario: stargazing with mark
“mark and stargazing date🥺”
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ok, you cannot convince me in any way, shape, or form!!!! that this man isnt obsessed with stars and outer space !!!!!!! !!
i mean his signature is literally shaped as a star !
his eyes are literally twinkling 24/7!!!!! - like STARS!!#%@$!
im getting off topic im sorry that this man is my entire galaxy 
anyways so a stargazing date with mark 
he geeks out so much 
every time you guys see a star above, he just does that thing where he slaps his knees and get all giggly because he’s just so excited 
luckily for the both of you 
there was also a meteor shower that night 
and he’s just so in awe, his jaw dropping to the ground and his eyes staring in amazement 
and you cant help but just admire your childhood best friend 
as he was the biggest star in your life 
literally and figuratively 
he notices you staring and suddenly he’s very aware of how romantic this scene is 
letting out a slightly awkward chuckle, he breaks the silence
“did you make a wish?” 
“yeah, i did,” you say, giving him a smile 
“did you?”
“mhm,” he replies, keeping eye contact with you 
his eyes darting down to your lips 
“what was your wish, mark?” you say, breaking him away from his thoughts
“if i say it out loud, it might not come true,” he whispers quietly 
“well, what if i can help you with your wish,” 
 he looks back down at your rosy lips 
“i-uh, i uhm...can i kiss you?”
and those were the only words you needed to hear to lean up and press your lips against his soft ones 
and if this wasnt the most cheesiest thing youve read 
the second round of the meteor shower started as soon as he deepened the kiss 
but this was short lived as the kiss ended with a round of giggles 
the two of you realizing what was actually happening
“you dont know how long ive been wanting to kiss you,” he admits, cheeks getting rosy and his shy smile coming out to play 
“do you want to know what my wish was ?”
he looks at you, one eyebrow going up as curiosity filled his eyes 
“that you would wish to kiss me,” you say smugly smiling, as you look back up at the sky 
mark lets out a cute laugh before gently turning your head to face him 
looking in your eyes for confirmation before giving you another sweet slow kiss
and another 
and another....
i think its safe to say that by the end of the night, you werent just mark lee’s best friend anymore (¬‿¬)
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