#such a sad widdle face

[greyias]

😟

[salty-kira]

Some more of Eros!! This little Urge knows of no time before Bhaal— he was born and raised within the cult. When both nature and nurture declare you a killer— well, how can you become anything but?

[forcebookish]

top tanin is giving me chest pains

[twilightakiishi]

How Suo reacts everytime you talk abt him on here:

EEEEEEEEP EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[delightfullygiddy]

My job: Listen you HAVE to get more credit cards! Just straight up beg people and keep asking even if they say no! If you don’t get any 3 months straight, they’ll take you off the register and put you on the floor! They'll even reduce your working days to just 1!

[thechaoticdruid]

°•IF THE BG3 COMPANIONS BABYSAT YOUR KIDS!•°

Lae'zel

Congratulations your children are spending an afternoon at boot camp!

You can rest assured they will be treated fairly at least.

No favoritism going on here.

Anyone who misbehaves shall be sent to solidarity confinement and left there until....Idk

If they want a snack they WILL have to fight one another in a duel to the death.

Or at least until one of them falls down and cries.

To the winner go the cookies.

Or more accurately maybe some giant space hamster jerky.

Karlach

This is assuming her engine has been fixed, naturally.

The kids absolutely love Auntie K.

Legit can carry them all on her shoulders at once.

She gives the best hugs too and is always so nice and warm.

She is up to play any games with them! Especially ones where she pretends to be a monster and chases them around.

Very protective of the little ones.

Brings them new stuffies each time she visits.

You MUST remind her constantly to watch her language around the little ones!

Gale

Arrives via magic portal.

Brings Tara to help him.

Takes it very personally if one of the children don't like him.

Tries to impress them via magic and creates a magical illusion to entertain the kiddos.

Attempts to teach them everything he knows about the weave.

Takes it very hard if the children fall asleep during his lecture.

Must be consoled by Tara.

If any take an interest in the weave they immediately become his favorite.

You'll probably end up coming home to your home appliances floating or having some kind of enchantment on them.

Halsin

Yes he turns into a bear and lets them ride on his back.

Most time is spent outside enjoying nature and all of its beauty.

Will carry the littlest one on his shoulders at all times.

Always brings healthy snacks, mostly fruit like apple slices.

Proceeds to take them to a nearby pond to feed the ducks.

Widdles them little animal figures to play with.

No TV or video games. The thought of technology taking over their lives makes him sick.

We play outside or we don't play at all.

Doesn't mind them grabbing at his ears, if they can even reach them that is!

He has to remind one of them multiple times that he unfortunately cannot turn into a dragon.

Sad sad truth.

Shadowheart

Makes cute little flower crowns with them.

Helps the little ones feel better if any of them are afraid of the dark.

Is very good at comforting them.

Possibly might be one of the older one's first goth girl crush.

Badmouths Lae'zel in front of them shamelessly.

Always puts on a tim Burton movie or something for them to watch.

Definitely the reason for any of their emo phases.

They think she's really cool though.

Wyll

Always the first to volunteer to babysit.

Man has the patience of a saint and can handle even the most unruly of children.

Always talks them up and is very careful to never put them down.

Tells them all kinds of exciting stories of his time as the Blade.

Makes sure to adjust them to be suitable for the kiddos.

Leaves out the scary parts.

If any of them are mean to one another and can't get along he's the type to make them each say something nice about the other as a punishment.

Let's them play with toy swords and teaches them a thing or two about using them.

Never raises his voice at them. Is super calm and collected.

Loves them all to pieces!

Also may or may not take them out to get ice cream if they're good.

Astarion

Assuming this is Spawnstarion we're talking about because the vampire Ascendant would just laugh in your face if you asked him then slam the door on you.

Our sweet little spawn will also likely laugh and think you're joking at first.

"You seriously want a vampire to watch over your children?"

Assuming you pay him and be sure to give him big sweet puppy dog eyes he may consider it.

This man is a very not my child not my problem kind of guy.

Gets annoyed with all the children asking tedious vampire questions and responds with very sarcastic answers.

Does not approve of them wanting to touch his ears.

Agrees to let them see his fangs in hopes to scare them (the mischievous little shit).

The children instead think they're cool, which confuses him. He really isn't sure how to feel about it.

Threatens to eat them if they get on his nerves.

Spends most of the time on the sofa, boredly reading a magazine or watching television.

Miraculously takes a shine to one of the younger girls who call him pretty and compliments his clothes and hair.

This is also given the girl is a little mischief gremlin who pulls pranks on her older siblings.

He lets her paint his nails purple or red while she gossips about her mother/father's new partner or her siblings.

Unapologetically shows her favoritism and lets her sit on his lap and watch TV with him.

Will not bat an eye if the other children run a muck and destroy shit.

Legit just keeps watching TV. Probably some drama filled 'reality' show.

He actually finds the chaos caused by the children quite amusing.

One of the children somehow ends up on the roof.

Once the parents are home and it's time to leave. The youngest girl gives him a hug.

His eyes get all big and round and almost threaten to tear up.

Astarion is not asked to babysit again.

Sorry some of them are so short, I mostly write for Astarion so I'm not very confident at doing the other characters.

Hope you like it though!

[burningcheese-merchant]

It's so cool to see CRK getting popular again, it feels so refreshing like so much new quality fan content dropping that we couldn't even DREAM about a couple of months ago, but it hurts my very soul seeing new players being interested in beast x ancient ships, in their dynamics, asking is it okay to ship it and getting slapped in the face with another "IT'S ABUSER X VICTIM IT'S A PROSHIP IT'S A DARKSHIP" (which is just not true) killing off all the fun, bc apparently enemies to lovers, AUs and what-ifs doesn't exist anymore and everything that isn't pure fluff is illegal now. "IT'S NOT ENEMIES TO LOVERS, BEASTS ABUSED AND TORTURED THEM" yeah THAT'S WHAT ENEMIES DO??? What else do you expect from a villain honestly??? Like in ANY media??? Beasts still got their ass beat in the end as they totally deserve BECAUSE ANCIENTS ARE NOT SOFT INNOCENT SMALL BABIES THAT NEED TO BE PROTECTED, they're grown ass IMMORTAL ADULTS with huge responsibilities, they rule kingdoms, they hold a huge power in their hands, they're imperfect and not innocent. They can stand for themselves, they can fight, they can destroy, they can lie and they WILL if they need to.

I can SMELL that a shit tonne of people in this fandom secretly enjoys beast x ancient as a guilty pleasure, a forbidden fruit, but they will never admit it just because they're afraid of being harassed and bullied and it's just sad how normalized it is to hurt actual people over shipping some mobile game characters, who are adults, doesn't have power imbalance between them and aren't related.

And allat coming from ME, who doesn't ship a single beast x ancient ship

It's sad lol. Sad for the Beast x Ancient community and honestly kind of pathetic for ardent detractors at this point. I've seen sooooo many Beast x Ancient fans get harassed and even sent death threats, it's not even funny (not that it ever was in the first place). Don't you have better things to do than get this mad about video games lol. Like a job or school or a hobby or something

You're right, the Ancients are not helpless widdle babies and I'm kind of sick of how often they're infantilized, in general and just for the sake of tearing down BxA. They're grown adults who are thousands of years old. Two of them are parents, whose children are grown adults themselves. 4 of 5 founded entire nations. 1 is an active ruler still (Cacao), one seeks to rule again (Golden). Let's not kid ourselves, they've probably all got blood on their hands (not to the degree the Beasts do, but still. You don't live that life without having to make tough choices). Stop treating them like porcelain dolls lol. Yes, the Beasts attacked them, but they're villains. That's what villains do. Go play Animal Crossing if you can't handle heroes and villains fighting each other lol

And then I get a laugh whenever those same people who screech about toxicity and abuse and yadda yadda turn around and ship H*llyt*ya or Sh*dowSp*ce. The former is BxA in a different costume. The latter... Man. You know. Because TWO deranged maniacs, who are fundamentally incompatible in every way and do not make sense at all and absolutely would hurt each other and bring each other down I hate that ship so damn much. Do not ask me abt it I WILL ramble and nobody needs that. Zero beef with fans though, we're coolio! Just a difference of opinion!, is such a better option, isn't it lol. Hypocrisy.

I'm sure you noticed that ep 7 + 8 brought out a whole lot of new ShadowVanilla fans. I agree w/ you, I can feel that there are a fuckton of BxA fans lurking in the darkness, waiting for an excuse to poke their heads out (like 7 + 8 lol), only hiding because they don't want to attract lunatics. Even YOU sent this ask anonymously. Most of my inbox is stuff from anons, and I look at them all and wonder, "how many of you are just afraid of backlash for expressing any joy in BurningCheese or any of the other BxA pairs?" It's ok, guys. Don't listen to them. Be you. I'm being me right now, as cringy as I am. I am Extremely Normal about BurningCheese and I'm not ashamed :) they're video game characters at the end of the day, just have fun. Why can't we all just be bros, man, what does any of this matter

[homelanderbutbig]

Homelander's Childhood Compilation

A collection of every mention of Homelander's childhood, from seasons 1-3 in "The Boys". I also included the season 2 promo with young Homie and his tutor, as well as episode 8 of "The Boys: Diabolical".

He's just a sad widdle war criminal baby boy and I wanna give him a hug. 😭

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

HOMELANDER COMPILATION LIST UNDER THE CUT:

Noise Compilation

Face Twitch Compilation

Childhood Compilation

Laser Eyes Compilation

Flight Compilation

Super Strength Compilation

Gloveless Compilation

Cape Flip Compilation

Fidget Compilation

Babygirl Voice Compilation

Ear Ringing Compilation

Smooch Compilation

Laugh Compilation

Mirror Compilation

Milk Compilation

[solomiracle]

i can't even focus on his culinary terrorism cause i instantly focused on his stupid widdle sad face. why do i think he looks cute. why do i want to kiss him. this is so stupid. shut up

[gekkochive]

listen to morning sex by ralph castelli while reading if you’d like

“Bebé, have you seen wings? I swear he was just—here.” Gekko finds you and wingman cuddling in bed. 

You rush to hide wingman under your blanket so the cuddle session wouldn’t end there.

“Uhhh.. the who now?” Wingman tearily rushes to Gekko at the sound of him as if you’d been holding him hostage for cuddles. (You were.)

“There's my li’l guy!” “Sana, sana!” Gekko excitedly says. “Aww wings come on I just wanted a hug!” You say in a baby-toned grumpy voice. 

“Oh my widdle wingypie, where have you been?! Fighting for your life against y/n again? Aww, I know, I know. See that bad guy over there?” Jokingly glaring at you.

“Bad y/n, bad guy y/n.” “Now, attack!” “Plant the spike, widdle man!” He yells.

They both lunge at you and start smothering you with affection. Wingman gurgles and Gekko laughs as he starts to kiss you all over your face. It's all fun and games until you feel something. First you think it was just his belt grazing your thigh, but you know that pulsing sensation anywhere. 

You’re taken aback, but you know what you’re about to do, exactly what. 

He kisses your neck, and then your ear and you let out the slightest moan.

“Hold it, amiga. Now what was that?” You pretend you didn’t just like what you were feeling, you start blushing and you cover yourself with both your hands. Though you realize you can’t let him see you like this. You have your pride and you’re not about to let go of it.  

“Me? Hold it? Sure, baby. Take those boxers off, and then we’ll talk ‘bout holding it.” You playfully exclaim. 

“Someone’s feelin’ it.” Gekko says as he chuckles. 

“What about it? There’s something you have I’m trying to feel too. I mean, felt it already anyways..” You rebut.

“Ayoooo chill what do you even—“ Before he can finish his sentence you grab onto his length with your hand while you’re still under him. 

“Ughh y/n, fuck.” “You got me.” He grunts and moans. He tells Wingman to go and hang out with Dizzy first while you stroke up and down through the tight clothing. Wingman is annoyed and thought to look back two times at Gekko on the way out, sad he couldn’t join the “cuddle”. 

You pull the garter of his boxers and let go as fast as you pulled it, earning a wince from the man. 

“Alright baby, he’s out. Where were we?” You swiftly flip him over and start french kissing him. You grab his hair and pull his entire head back to give him hickeys where you know he’s weak. Neck, under the ears, then under the chin. He’s needy and loud. You like that. You like that more than you should. 

You enjoy the view as he sports his pink over-the-chest cropped hoodie, exposing his entire torso. Who needs to take shit off when you can see everything anyways? 

You don’t stop stroking him up and down, and you kiss him, swapping spit, and you feel him moaning into your mouth. He tries to stop them because he hates being so vulnerable, but he’s fine with it because it’s you. 

You lick your way down his body. “Hmmmmm~ y/n please.”  You kiss his tip, and it starts to leak. Sticky and yummy. “Teo, you taste so good, you know that?” You spit on it and he rolls his eyes back from the tease. 

You lick his length through the clothing and he can’t even use his words anymore. “Hnggg please y/n, please~” You bite him gently and look into his eyes. He winces and he smiles. “Fuck.. Please just take it out.” He needily says. 

“Whoops, we’ve got a big one!” You say as you take it out of his boxers and slap his dick onto your cheek, and he tells you “That’s so hot baby.” You don’t waste time and start deepthroating it, shocking him and he thrusts into you, and arches his back high. “Fuckkkk. I can’t y/n, I can’t… I can’t— fuckkkk~” He moans loud and you moan back with his dick in your mouth and he loves the sensation of vibration from it.

He starts twitching in your mouth and you don’t stop stroking and deepthroating him at the same time. “Ohhhhhh—I’m gonna… I’m gonna cum~” He tries to grab your hair and you quickly catch his wrist and pin it down on the bed. He’s close, and you know that because he just stopped talking and slurred anything he tried to say.

He finally cums in your mouth and he twitches, but before he can soften up, you play with the tip and start sucking at it again. “Y/n oh my god… I can’t cum anymore please. You’ve finished me up I ca— I can’t—“ He cums all over your face this time and he is just so loud. 

You gently pat his dick and say “Defenders win!”. As he bursts into laughter and shivers from the overstimulation from earlier.  

“Cariño, hate to break it to you, but this is far from over.” 

—— end

note: she tried offering aftercare and he declined ‘cause aftercare is for AFTER not midway 😁😁😁

[duckymcdoorknob]

𝓣𝓲𝓬𝓴𝓵𝓮𝓽𝓸𝓫𝓮𝓻 𝓓𝓪𝔂 1: 𝓐𝓷𝓽𝓲𝓬𝓲𝓹𝓪𝓽𝓲𝓸𝓷

SEND FUCKING HELP I FLUSTERED MYSELF WRITING THIS

Tags @undercovergamer @ticklish-n-stuff @chrimsss

—This do have tickles under the cut—

Aether should have known better than to challenge Itto in, well, anything. After all, as the old saying goes, never poke a sleeping, erm, oni... The blonde was currently running through the fields of Narukami island, Itto hot on his heels.

“Get back here, you little brat! You can’t escape the wrath of numero uno!” Itto roared, effortlessly hurdling tree stumps and leaping across rocks.

“I didn’t mean it, I didn’t mean it!” the traveler whined in reply, keeping an eye on his footing.

In all reality, there wasn’t a bone in Aether’s body that anticipated Itto actually harming him. But, maybe he should have thought a bit before he said that the oni was a bad TCG player…

“Oh yeeeeaaaah sure! Didn’t mean it my left- WAH!”

Aether snapped his head backwards to see that the oni had overlooked a small stone, and he was now face-down in the grass.

“Haha! Smell ya later- woAH-“

Before he could realize, the blonde toppled onto the grass, using his hands to break his fall. Ouch… As he attempted to scramble to his feet, he felt a weight press onto the center of his back.

When his head whipped around, the traveler was met by an amused snort from Ushi, the very same “obstacle” that he had tripped over.

“Ushi! How could you just betray me like this, after everything we’ve been through?!” Aether whined as he tried to push himself upward.

“Haha! Good boy, Ushi! Who’s my widdle babywaby abuubuubuubuububbah-“

The traveler couldn’t help but snort at the incoherent baby talk that was being vested upon the animal atop of his back.

“Oh? Is something funny, mister tough guy? Huh? Got anymore zingers for me n’ Ushi? Eh?” Itto interrogated, effortlessly lifting the little bull, and flipping the blonde over to face him.

Aether squeaked at how easily the oni flipped him, glowing red when both of his arms were pinned above his head with great ease.

“Ohhhh? Someone’s embarrassed, how adorable!” Itto cooed as he pinched the traveler’s left cheek.

The blonde giggled a bit in nervousness from the contact, squirming in the white-haired male’s hold.

“Ohohoho! Got a case of the giggles, traveler? I know juuuuuust the cure!”

The oni formed his right hand into a claw and wiggled his fingers above Aether’s neck. The swordsman squeaked and giggled once more, attempting to wiggle away from the threatening claw.

“No? You don’t want your giggles to go away? Aww, soooo sad. I guess we’ll have to get you to the doctor then!” The oni stuck his lip out and pretended to pour as his fingers continued to wiggle above the traveler’s body.

He moved his hand downward toward the blonde’s middle, coming dangerously close to touching.

“Ihihihittohoho!”

“Hmm?”

“Stahahahap thahahat!” Aether whined as he tried to wriggle a hand free, the ghost tickles not giving him any mercy.

“I haven’t even touched you yet!”

“Ihihi cahahan feheheel ihihihit! Stahaha-AGH Stahahappihihihit!”

“What do you mean? Stop what? I’m not even doing anything!” Itto rebutted as he repeatedly inched his hands closer and then recoiled, accentuating his teases as he dipped dangerously close to Aether’s bare stomach. “Ooooh, Itto’s gonna gETCha! Ohhhh yES he is! Ohhhhhh he’s gonna gETCha!”

The traveler whined incoherently as his giggles grew in volume and his squirms were more desperate. “Ihihihitto! Plehehehehease! I cahahant tahahahake ihihihit!”

“Please what? You gotta tell me what to do, or else you’ll never be free from the wrath of numero uno!”

“Gohohods- juhuhust dohohoho it ahahalreheheady!”

“Oh? What am I gonna do?”

The traveler whined through his giggles as itto’s hand got closer and closer to his bare stomach…

“You want me to… tickle ya? Huh? Want me to get my revenge so bad? You must love it, how adooooorable!don’t worry, Itto’s gonna getcha, ohh yes he is!”

“IHIHIHITTOHOHO!” The blonde’s face were as red as the fresh dendrobium that had toppled out of his bag. “JUHUHUST TIHIHICKLE MEHEHE ALREHEHEADY!”

“Oh, tickle you? You’ve got it, traveler!” With a Cheshire grin, the oni released Aether’s arms and used both hands to gently squeeze at the blonde’s stomach.

The traveler squealed as he regretted his words, hands instantly shooting down to grab the Oni’s wrists. “WAITWAITWAITWAHAHAHAIT! IHIHIHI LIHIHIHIED! IHIHIHITTOHOHO!”

“No waiting now! I thought you wanted me to tickle you so bad? If you’d like, we can go back to the game we played before!” The oni chirped, continuing his gentle, ticklish assault on the poor traveler.

“HYEHEHEHAHAHA! IHIHIHITTOHOHOHO! WAHAHAHAIT!” The blonde shrieked as the ticklish squeezes on his right side switched to gentle pinching around his belly button. “HOHOHOHOLD OHOHOHON!”

The oni paused and let Aether regain his wind. “You okay, little buddy?”

“Y-Yeah. Just, uh… just a bit flustered. Give me a minute to cool off.” The traveler admitted, ears burning a fiery pink.

“Oh you are just so freakin’ cute-“ Itto gushed as he gave a little prod to the blonde’s side.

After a few moments, Aether nodded, resulting in another toothy grin from the oni.

“Just tell me to stop whenever you need a break, cause this oni is getting his proper revenge.” With a swift movement, Aether found his arms pinned above his head once more. “And we ain’t stopping till I’m the one outta breath.”

The traveler rued the day he ever made the teasing comment toward the oni the second he felt Itto’s lips blow a raspberry on the side of his belly button. He threw his head back and shrieked as he realized he had a longggg way to go.

Aether and his big mouth…

🎃————♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎————🎃

[narwhalandchill]

how are we feeling about this project amber update

assuming this is in relation to childe bc who the fuck else JWDJWJKDJKW anon im so sorry if not. also so so sorry for how out of hand this got. i am simply unwell about him.

But! Well. there certainly are thoughts

(obviously 4.6 datamine of arle SQ and her voicelines; This Will Not Spoil Anything Abt The Main SQ Plot, i only discuss the relevant parts. also some p Heavy negativity towards fanon ooc at the start youve been warned dont @ me)

(i mean i didnt even read anything of the SQ but The scene w childe so idek the main plot of the quest rly either lmao. tho go at ur own risk if u wanna check the dialogue out; its the 2nd quest log but it does hint at the greater story)

TLDR: how i feel abt his appearance in a vaccuum? quite solid despite the briefness, actually. accounting for the way fanon is 100% likely going to be reading into this and turning it into the Lets Infantilize Ajax Even More 2024 championship? conflicted.

in other words; a certified labyrinth warriors moment - theyve expanded on childes character in a very interesting and quite a compelling way and while i Do like the potential in what im seeing from hoyos end theyve also done it so that its going to be misinterpreted to hell and back by fanon so i kinda have an immediate jaded love-hate moment going on JJWJDKJDKJWJDWKJ

its literally just labyrinth warriors flashbacks - that event has some of my ALL TIME favorite insights into who ajax is and how he views the world and himself but when the event came out all everyone cared abt was to warp it into baby boy stuck in scawwy paper boy dungeon dehumanizes himself by calling himself a weapon and doesnt love himself he is such a sad trauma meowkitten 🥺🥺so yeah

bc like lets look at this properly for a bit; okay he went back to fontaine to look for skirk still somewhat injured and waa waa my 286 month infant baby cannot Make decisions like that!!!!!11! which is to say. i am tired of him getting this shit every time.

is it smart of him to get on the move immediately with just the bare minimum of rest? no. do i like that hes straining himself before proper recovery? not particularly no. do i feel the particular need to psychoanalyze this grown man and feared warrior whos 100% survived Way Worse in Way More Extreme Situations for it? hell fucking no.

while not at all the course of action a medical professional would approve of. from childes POV its perfectly logical hes priorizing going back for skirk when its literally the FIRST TIME shes showed up in like. a Decade. when hes been looking for her all this time are you kidding me 😭😭😭 but fanon must keep fanoning for their widdle baby girl so what does a hater like me know

anyway. seething and venting over im gonna try to avoid bringing up how much i hate this kinda infantilization of ajax now im sorry for bringing it up so much on ur innocent ask anon KJWDJKWKJDJDKWJKD. neutral discussion moment. i Promise

so it seems that theyre going for the pulcinella-is-shady-about-ajax (and prolly his family) angle for good and like. personally for me as long as the only real source of that claim was scara (a cynical edgelord who doesnt believe in non-exploitative human relationships, mind you) i was rather skeptical towards just instantly drawing that conclusion, but well. with the scene in arles AQ it appears to be sth theyre building towards

i actually really fucking loved that scene bc while theres outsider perspectives (scara obvi; and even arles line for him has that vibe. and ppl still take that shit face value 💀💀) and a lot of fandom assuming childes like. completely clueless and naive and ignorant towards the potential risks involved with trusting pulcinella. this is actually a very clever demonstration of quite the opposite? and showcasing how despite his aversion towards schemes and lies hes still intelligent and knows the kind of people hes dealing with when it comes to his fellow harbingers

like. childe has a negative opinion of arle based on what pulcinella has told him about her because at face value many of her deeds are in heavy conflict with his values of loyalty and family. and because he does not have the further context behind her actions and what the HotH under her is really like. Obviously hed hold a very hostile and wary view towards arlecchino

(ESPECIALLY when with all this biased intel hes still going to run into kids from the house!!! and then hes going wtf? these are good kids. what the hell is that knave doing with them??? blink twice if you need help i will start a civil war for yall like thats how he is with kids!!!!)

so YES. pulcinella has given him if not false then at least misleading intel based on the political tension between himself and arlecchino and the wider HotH. and childes taken that at face value! sure! he is close with pulcinella of course he would!

BUT. THEN. he returns to fontaine and seeks arlecchinos help looking for skirk. and observes her behavior and modus operandi for himself as well as the kids. does he go "nah she must be just hiding the crazy evil shit i would never distrust pulcinella" and leave it at that when reality doesnt completely match his expectations?

NO. because when offered the opportunity through the traveler asking about the HotH childe immediately capitalizes on the opportunity to prod for answers and see if pulcinella is lying to him!!!!

and hes so fucking smart with the way he does it too???? i LOVE his intelligence. the entire thing is so simple yet elegant; it Completely relies on his reputation as the kinda gullible harbinger whod Never scheme or hide Anything to indirectly affirm or deny his suspicions. he doesnt Need to Pretend to care about the possibility of arle betraying the kids bc he genuinely does!! and when she pushes back against the accusation he doesnt Need to fake admitting to her that well, actually, its all just rumors so he could be completely wrong. and so on. like he navigates the entire thing so effortlessly. and whats the end result?

childe has Confirmation of pulcinellas possible ulterior motives in action AND that arlecchino is a much more reliable ally than he initially assumed. all the while appearing as just The Straightforward 11th. like obviously id need to hear it voiced first to be sure but in text it v much gives the impression hes almost kinda just. playing up the threats towards arle and being "dumb" on Purpose?? to get the answers he wanted out of arle without appearing like hes fishing for anything particular. and i just hhhhhhhhhhh

i love when he does this so muchhhh!!!!!! 😭😭 he doesnt need to become some machiavellian schemer to be able to strategize !!!!!! he avoids scheming bc he Dislikes it not bc hes incapable of it like this has Always been the case Since Liyue AQ and i love whenever they show that side of himm . my Beloved

so anyway. while i do still think the like "pulcinella is bad and has his family hostage" is still kind of a generic plotline and i hope the writing regarding the whole thing wont ultimately turn out to be sth That simplified and black and white. its p clear theyre doing Something with pulcinellas motivations and as they are. im Really glad theyre letting it show that childes not just some completely passive party being manipulated in this all. he Is thinking abt this stuff and his position among the harbingers. ig we shall see where it goes - not the greatest fan of the concept still, but canon text supports it becoming a thing way more than when it was just scaras word we had for it. hope theyll surprise me positively w how they go about it!

then briefly for the rest uhh

also loved arle and childe just shittalking the rest of the harbingers it was amazing. i wasnt expecting this kinda dynamic between them at all but its great lmao. also i wanna see childe hang out w the HotH kids

as for project stuzha; so we dont really get anything solid on it other than being summoned back to snezhnaya for it is apparently a Big Deal. but still very interested. let my man have his endgame significance Trust

childes appearance was obviously v brief ultimately but that was clear from his leaked linecount to begin with - i am pretty satisfied with what they seem to have done w him. like its not The Best but also i wasnt expecting his lore to get some massive expansion in another harbingers SQ . the worst i feared was that it was just going to be a flashback of arle returning his vision which did Not happen so massive W. i am super hyped to hear this scene voice acted proper and happy to see him again, i really hope he gets to appear at least once more in an interlude or dains quest or something before going on hiatus again but idk if thats too much to ask LKKWJDJWDJWD

also: i am never changing my namecard after this patch drops. oh my godddddddd its So Fucking Beautiful 😭😭😭😭

But. Yeah. lots of good stuff. unfortunately lots of it will get misinterpreted and fanon will get obnoxious about it. but i still love getting to see him again and i am speedrunning that namecard day fucking one mutuals and/or followers in EU please add me (UID 711090267) ill need coop buddies for the world bosses

thank youuuuuuu for the ask i hope this monstrosity of a monologue doesnt scare u off 💀💀💀

[bringthesauerkraut]

Hehe 🤣 Look at his sad widdle face 😂

Been waiting for this day since the podcast lol.

Also love how he made Nate wear one too 😆

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[ireallylovepupplies101stuff]

Gods AU Oneshot: The Demon (Pipsqueak) Servant.

Summery: When Demi-God Cuphead got his first mortal servant, it wasn't like how Cuphead expected. Though, maybe that's not a bad thing.

________ Out of all the mortals in the world, Cuphead had to get the cussing stubborn one.

It was interesting, how on his birthday he was given his first mortal servant by a village that pays respect to his mother often. It was probably their way to kiss up to her, but either way Cuphead wasn’t sure how to process the tiny little demon that approached him with a glare and had to be forced by his village leader to bow in respect by pushing his head down. He continued to glare during the rest of the village’s festival, and his glaring got worse when they finally left to return to the kingdom of the gods.

The only time the demon’s expression changed was when they were getting ready to leave, a young wolf approached and hugged the demon tightly with tears in his eyes.

“I don’t want you to go Bendy…”

Returning the hug tightly, Bendy pulled back a little to hold the wolf’s face as he put on a sad smile. “I know, but this won’t be the last time we see each other, okay? I’ll come see you as often as I can, I gotta make sure the village is keeping their word. I’m also going to write to you weekly. So keep an eye out for my first letter.”

With how the wolf was still crying and now started to whine, the demon made the young pup look at him. “Hey, where’s my happy widdle wolfy?”

Giving a teary chuckle, the wolf’s tail began to wag. “Here I am!”

Happy to see that helped, Bendy pulled the pup back into a hug. “I love you so much Boris…”

“I love you too Bendy.”

Cuphead didn’t think too much about that afterwards. He’s seen people who start working for the gods have tearful goodbyes with loved ones before. It wasn’t uncommon since mortal citizens didn’t live with the gods unless they were married to one or working for one. Still, that was the only time he witnessed his demon servant Bendy actually smile.

Or speak kindly for that matter.

A few days after being taken to the kingdom of the gods, Bendy tended to work in silence. Cuphead didn’t speak to him much either because he wasn’t sure what to do with a servant exactly, so he just gave Bendy busy work.

However, he did take note of how other servants would practically pamper their gods they work for, holding plates of fruit for them while fanning them and/or keeping them out of the sun. So, at one point while working on his studies, feeling his stomach growling after so many hours in front of his books, Cuphead ordered Bendy to give him some fruit from the bowl on the other side of the room. Not wanting to pause in his reading in order to be done sooner, and wanting to see what it’s like to be pampered by his own servant.

Bendy paused in his task of organizing the books that were stacked around the room, glanced at the bowl, then gave Cuphead an irritated look. “Get it yourself. I’m busy.”

Now, normally gods wouldn’t take it well if a MORTAL of all people actually had the nerve to talk back, especially a servant! Cuphead though, was too stunned to really react. His jaw dropped over how Bendy had the guts to say that to him, the demi-god known for his rage, without a hint of fear.

“... D-did you just talk back to me???”

Going back to work, Bendy didn’t even look at him this time as he huffed. “Your legs aren’t broken.”

Getting nothing but silence, Bendy glanced over this time, and rolled his eyes over how flabbergasted the demi-god looked. “Oh get over it. You’re a demi-god capable of shooting stars out of your fingers. You’re perfectly capable of standing up and walking 10 feet to get an apple.”

Cuphead doesn’t know what’s more shocking, Bendy’s attitude, or how he actually did get up and get the apple himself like Bendy told him.

Worst of all, this kind of thing kept happening!

Bendy actually refused to do certain orders when busy with something else, he gave Cuphead attitude, he disrespected other gods he didn’t work for, and he certainly wouldn’t hold himself back on speaking his mind. It was giving the little demon one hell of a reputation, and ticked off so many gods that they went to Cuphead’s MOTHER to complain about the disrespectful little demon.

She had pulled Cuphead aside and asked him if Bendy wasn’t doing his job like he was supposed to, and Cuphead wanted to confirm that he wasn’t… but, honestly, he kinda was doing his job. He did it pretty well in fact. He was just stubborn with an attitude.

So, Demitasse didn’t see the need to do anything about the little demon. If he was doing his job, then there wasn’t a problem. The other gods just had to suck it up.

Things continued this way for a while. It got to the point that Cuphead wondered if Bendy’s attitude was mostly directed towards him, because he’d occasionally catch him chatting with Mugman and holding small talk. He even talked to demi-god Dimitri and helped her out whenever she had her hands full! Meanwhile if Cuphead told Bendy to get his clothes for him to wear for the day, he’d get said clothes thrown at his face.

It got to the point where he’d actually start yelling and arguing with Bendy, and Bendy actually yelled and argued back. ESPECIALLY if Cuphead made a comment on his height. THAT never failed to get Bendy MAD.

Certainly explains why the angry little pipsqueak was given to a rageful demi-god.

At least Bendy didn’t put up a verbal fight when he was told he had to accompany Cuphead to his combat training with Hat. The demi-god was thankful for that, considering he was already not looking forward to training anyways. He didn’t want to deal with Bendy being a pain on top of that.

Today’s training was hand to hand combat with no god powers against another opponent. Cuphead was up against some schmuck who for some reason had some competitive vendetta against him. Why? Cuphead had no cussing clue. He never bothered to learn the guy’s name anyways, he could care less.

But today? Oooooh today this cusser was making him mad.

For some reason today he thought the best strategy to fight Cuphead was to get under his skin by fighting dirty and being petty. Sneaking in a god strength powered hit enough to make a blow hurt even more than it should, kicking up dirt to try blinding him, the cusser even managed to punch him in the throat! Hat wouldn’t intervene when Cuphead tried objecting or calling out his opponent, claiming they had to know what to do in any situation.

Bendy though from where he was watching surprisingly started objecting LOUDLY, yelling at the other demi-god to stop being a cussing schmuck. That though did nothing to help, if anything the schmuck just taunted Cuphead over how he’s such a pathetic demi-god that his own servant won’t respect him.

Eventually, Cuphead snapped.

He doesn’t remember much of what happened. He blacked out, and the next thing he knows, Hat is pulling him off the other demi-god who was now a bloody pulp. He dismissed Cuphead from training after that “disappointing” turn of events, and now Cuphead was limping off to go get cleaned up.

His head was still kinda foggy from the blackout. 

He thought he was getting cussing better at handling these damn black outs, but he’s still struggling with them as if he’s some overpowered child! What kind of demi-god is he if he can’t control his stupid powers and anger?!

So deep in thought as he mentally scolded himself, he nearly jumped when someone yelled LOUDLY.

“CUPHEAD!”

Stopping, Cuphead blinked in surprise when he finally noticed his servant, who was now standing in front of him, blocking his path. The Demi-god’s surprised expression soon turned into an irritated one as he glared at Bendy. “WHAT?”

“I’ve been trying to get your attention for a minute now! You need to sit down.”

Scoffing, Cuphead attempted to move around Bendy. “Cuss off.”

Bendy blocked his path yet again. “You’re sitting down, NOW.”

“The hell?! Who the cuss do you think you are telling me- HEY!!”

Grabbing Cuphead by his least injured arm, with a surprising amount of strength (though honestly Cup shouldn’t be surprised, Bendy’s a demon after all) the demon pulled the demi-god with him, ignoring his objections and his demands to be let go, as he started to move until he found a room with chairs. Bendy pulled Cuphead over to one of the chairs and stood in front of him, GLARING right at him with his now red eyes. “You’re limping and dripping blood all over the floor! You shouldn’t be on your feet so SIT THE CUSS DOWN!!!”

Stunned, Cuphead found himself sitting like Bendy said, making the demon huff and nod in satisfaction before he walked off to find medical supplies. When he did, he came back to the demi-god and proceeded to patch him up without being told to do so. Telling Cup to hold still, Bendy carefully began to clean the blood off his face.

Feeling the clean cloth rub against his scratched up and bruised face made Cuphead cringe slightly from the sting, it was then that he actually started to FEEL everything. The scratches and cuts he got from his opponent when he got more desperate to fight Cuphead off, the blood stains on his clothes that was making it uncomfortably stick to his skin, the sweat that was making every open wound STING, and not to mention how his knuckles throbbed from how hard he had hit the scum.

Cussing OW.

Seeing how Cuphead was trying his damn hardest to hold still despite his discomfort, Bendy paused for a bit, then continued to clean the demi-god up, albeit a bit more gently now. “... You would have won that sparring match honorably if that cusser wasn’t a scumbag.”

It took a bit for Cuphead to process Bendy’s words. When he did, it made him realize something.

Every time Bendy talked to him, and verbally talked back to him, as well as other gods. How he was polite to Mugman and Dimitri because they spoke kindly to him. Bendy doesn’t treat him like an almighty god. He treats him as someone he’ll respect when he earns his respect.

Bendy treats him, like an actual person.

“...Thanks.”

[rainwalker-dragonblade29]

Atra esterní Ono thelduin!

Dropping in to share a heartwrenching Eragon headcanon.... how Brom found ways to bond with his Son, and Eragon's early years in Carvahall.

Say, when eragon was a baby, Selena had just left Carvahall after telling brom about his son. Dear old Brom is so happy but sooo sad that he can't keep Eragon with himself, and it is bittersweet to know he will have to watch from afar because he can't ever tell Eragon the truth of his lineage...

And because Eragon is so widdle right now Garrow or his wife Marian won't take him out of home until he is a bit older... Brom takes flowers to Eragon just with the excuse to see him. He told Garrow and Marian that he's new in town and he's been hearing everywhere that a beautiful new baby has been born in Garrow's family and he is a sentimental storyteller who felt tempted to come congratulate. And that day, just a few days after Eragon's birth, his father finally sees him. It makes him very emotional, because baby eragon is very cute. And all he can manage to say "he puts stars to shame with that face and a name made for glory!"

Garrow and Marian are astonished to see him cry and he has to make up an excuse that he lost his own son long ago.

"I don't know if this is how all storytellers are, but no man should be this lily livered" Garrow whispers.

"Oh, but he lost his own child, imagine how you'd feel if we lost our Roran..." Marian retorts.

The couple pity him for it, and Marian says, "you can visit him whenever you desire friend." Garrow doesn't have a very high opinion of the storyteller but he seems kind says he'll allow it on occasion. Brom thinks they will feel like he's intruding if he came anytime he wished to be with Eragon which was all the time and they might see him as a bothering fly, and be suspicious of him so accepts their favour knowing he can't exploit their allowance.

So mostly he would scry Eragon when he was alone, or take an occasional hike up the hill once a month with the reason of "keeping his old legs still working young" to come say hi to Eragon, but sparingly.

When harvest time usually came, before Selena left Eragon there, only Garrow would do the harvest, and Marian would care for lil Roran... but when harvest came sometime before eragon turned a year old, there was to be some wedding in the village and Marian had promised to help the other ladies prepare. So she had no option but to take Eragon and Roran with her, and she's finding the kids hard to manage as her attention is very much split between her work with the food and to whomever who is just a little free to watch the two boys for a few minutes, with eragon crying loudly and Roran running about nobody has peace.

Brom came amidst all this as the family of the bride to be married had asked him to marry them for he was fairly old and the reputation of a goodwilled man who came to their aid when they needed someone to read the vows. And he heard all the commotion happening in the back with Roran banging pots and pans and Eragon crying and he tells Marian he could take the kids to his little house and watch them till Marian is done. No one is sure how an old man could care for two children let alone a baby, but since everyone is tired of the clamor they are grateful that Brom takes them.

Roran finds two spoons in his house and he is again hitting them together and baby eragon cries so brom casts a spell so that only roran will hear the joyful noise of the spoons. He calms Eragon too with a soft glowing werelight that Eragon gets fascinated by and wants to hold the blue orb. And later that afternoon, he tells the boys stories till nightfall about Rider's city and dragons, with Eragon in his arms. Even roran listens to his exaggerated speeches.

When Marian comes to pick them up, Brom insists that she leave the kids with him every harvest time for he much enjoyed their company and even Roran behaved. That astonished her. And Eragon seemed happy too for he cried as soon as Marian took him from Brom's arms. So after that year she'd go leave them at his place during the harvest, or when the harvest was plentiful and Garrow needed a hand (much to hurt Garrow's pride for he was the "I can manage it alone" man) or she would tell Brom to come to their place to watch the kids. And some years went by in this fashion, when harvest time was the best month of the year.... and once Roran was 10 ish he'd help Garrow in the farm and Eragon was left at Brom's home and Eragon used to have much to tell Brom about Squirrels on the farm or curious things he looked at, and Brom would tell him more tales only to be met my half a dozen questions the moment he began. Once Eragon and Roran were old enough, he stopped using magic here and there around them.

He really cherished those early years, and it hurt to never tell Eragon the truth. And when eragon was 10 he was allowed to wander how he wished in town. Ever since forever Marian and Garrow would tell the kids never to go too far in the valley near the Spine and Eragon grew ever curious to what was so dangerous about them.

One day he wandered in there, trying to be brave and got lost in the Spine and nearly chased by a wolf. His family was worried sick, and Brom brought him homethat day to their relief. He had luckily scried him before and rushed to Eragon's aid as fast as he could.

Roran would tease him about it for some time. And Marian died sometime after that incident. But after that frightful experience, when Eragon was 13, he vowed to be braver and practiced archery and and before the winter he'd go hunt. Those who knew he ventured into the Spine were mostly afraid of the prospect. But Brom was proud of him. So very proud of his brave boy who grew up having his father and never knowing.

OH HOW I LOVE THIS SERIES!

[camels-pen]

Could you please write more of yourdanny phantom x jjba au? I really liked it!

glad you like it! and i'm pretty much always open for requests so here you go!

Ao3 link | previous fic

-

"GET- MMF" Danny struggled in the iron clad grip while claws dug into his face. At this rate he'd suffocate!

He tried to turn intangible, but his power didn't so much as flicker.

What was it that Polnareff guy said? Use his 'stand' to turn things intangible?

Danny flapped an arm out, in the vague direction of Fall Out Boy. Eventually, he hit something and the familiar feeling of his powers washed over him. His tormentor fell to the ground.

Danny bent over on his knees as he let go of his stand. "Finally, a breath of fresh air."

He heard a growl and his shoe started to feel wet.

"Oh- dude!" Danny shook out his foot. "Just because I wouldn't let you eat my hair?!"

Iggy laughed as he trotted off, hopping up on the table Polnareff was sitting at. Then he started munching on the plate of sandwiches that were meant for Danny.

"Y'know I've never met a dog I haven't liked before," Danny grumbled, pulling up a chair. "But I guess I'm having all kinds of new experiences this week."

Polnareff tapped his cigarette in the ashtray. "We've only known you a few days."

"Exactly."

"It's not so bad," Polnareff said. "You're not in any danger while you're learning; that's far better than most people have it."

"Look, Polnareff, I appreciate it and all but did you have to use Iggy to teach me?"

"He's a good motivator." Polnareff grinned. "And it keeps him entertained so he doesn't go after me."

"And the truth comes out." Iggy laughed his little dog laugh. Danny glared at him. "Oh, this doesn't get you off the hook; I know you're smart enough to know what you're doing. I've seen you steal Mr. Joestar's wallet when he isn't looking."

Iggy turned away. Polnareff took a drag of his cigarette, hand covering his mouth.

With the saddest, most apologetic puppy dog eyes, Iggy turned back with a whimper. His head was ducked low and his ears were downturned. A textbook picture of a sad little doggy.

Danny held strong. He would not be swayed. He knew exactly what was going on here and-

"Ugh, I can't stay mad at your adorable widdle face." Danny held Iggy's face. He scratched behind one of Iggy's ears- the same spot Cujo always liked- and the dog pressed into his hand. "Oh, who's a terrible little mischief maker? You! Yes you are, you little-BWUH?!"

Suddenly, Danny was sitting in a mountain of sand, trying in vain to dig his way out before remembering Fall Out Boy. He had his stand pull him out and the sound of Polnareff practically pissing himself with laughter greeted his valiant escape from a deadly betrayal.

Iggy barked at Polnareff and he waved his hand, gasping something about an agreement.

"I nearly-" Danny paused to hack and spit out all the sand in his mouth. "I nearly suffocated twice! In one day!"

Polnareff gave a teary-eyed apology. The tears were from laughter. "I told him if he could cover you in sand, I'd get him a steak. It was supposed to be practice for being ambushed." Polnareff wheezed, holding his stomach. "I didn't think he'd bury you!"

"Ha ha ha." Danny shook out his pant leg. "Keep laughing and I'll bury you in a mountain of sand. Maybe on the beach so the crabs can get you."

Polnareff did keep laughing, but not for long. A wave of sand washed over him, almost identical to the one still on Danny's seat. Silver Chariot appeared moments later, digging through the sand as Polnareff shouted muffled curses and threats to Iggy's person.

The dog wasn't listening though, hopping off the table and walking off who knows where. Danny stared after him.

Iggy's ear flicked. The same one Danny had scratched.

Danny smiled. He'd have to remember to nab a stick of coffee gum later in thanks.