#subtly shook my head bc. that is just what this woman is like and i knew it wouldn’t make anything better

[morgana-pendragon]

shit shit shit i was so deep in sleep that when my dad just called to ask me something i accidentally gave him the real answer and kind of revealed how insane his mom treats me and now he’s like kind of pissed 😭

[purecantarella]

Good Girl

and ya girl's backkk! i wanted to come back a little while ago, but i didn't want to rush myself to come back and then just disappear again. but i am back bc i have found a will to live again AHSASJDH this'll be the long awaited hush reversed version. it felt fitting that i come back with this fic AHAHHAA enjoy my lovelies 💓 update to when i'm writing this : lISA GOT COVID BUT THE OTHER GIRLS ARE OKAY. i got really pressed a couple days because of the news. anyway...back to the smut HAHAHA o!rosé x a!reader 🔥 disclaimer/s : this is some very mature content, if you're not 18+ please go find some nice floof or angst instead

You never pegged yourself as a jealous alpha...no. With all your previous partners you'd let them do their thing. You couldn't be bothered with their omega or beta dramatics. The feeling never even crossed you before.

But your previous partners weren't your mate. They weren't Park Chaeyoung.

It began with you visiting Chae and the other girls during their practice. You had food in hand as you cheerily walked into the practice room. The scents in the room mixed in an almost unrecognisable way. You made an attempt to find your mate's scent but it was muted in the other smells.

"Baby!" Chae's voice caught your attention first before she barrelled into you. You smiled widely as you pulled her closer by the waist.

Then you smelled it.

You pulled away and saw her wearing a black hoodie, a hoodie that definitely didn't have your smell on it. It in fact had her fellow member, Lisa's, smell all over it who happened to be an alpha herself.

You forced a tight smile and waved to the other girls standing behind Chaeyoung. The shorter woman placed a soft kiss over your lips before she was called back to practice. You offered her a small smile and placed your lips over hers, letting a possessive arm wrap around her waist. You pulled away, leaving her to walk back to her position in a dazed state.

You didn't want to seem like a possessive alpha who forbade her from being friends with other alphas, so you sat back and bit back the snarls that threatened to break every time she walked by with someone else's scent all over her. But seeing Rosé in a jacket scented by another alpha left a bitter taste in your mouth.

The choreography for their song didn't help either. The maintained eye contact with one another, the way Lisa's hand dragged over your mate's body, and the small and hidden smiles that they both threw each other's way, it all made your blood boil. The clench you held in your jaw was beginning to feel painful with how long you'd kept it locked.

After what felt like forever, their practice ended. The girls bowed to their choreographer before going around the room to collect their stuff. You stood up as you saw Chae run up to you, jumping into your arms. Momentarily, you forgot about the scented jacket and smiled fondly at the feeling of her in your arms.

"Rosie!" Jennie called, catching you both off guard. "Is N/n coming over for dinner?"

Your mate whipped her head back to face you, a pleading look on her face. A soft laugh fell from you before you nodded, lifting your hand to give the other girl's a thumbs up.

"Do you not want to change first, baby?" You asked, subtly wanting her to get out of that damn jacket. Rosé shook her head, "I'll still have to shower at the dorm, then I can get changed." She explained before slinging her back over her shoulder, to which you pulled it away from her. She smiled up at you again before she wrapped her arm around your

The five of you piled into the group's van. While Jennie, Jisoo, and Lisa were all engaged in their own conversations, Chaeyoung leaned up against you. Still wearing that God-awful hoodie. The closer your mate snuggled up to you, the angrier your inner alpha got. A low growl accidentally slipped from your lips as you saw her pull the jacket's fabric to her nose before taking in a deep breath.

Chae pulled away, her eyes going wide. On the other hand, you were fed up with the smell that lingered on her body now. Your finger hooked under her chin, forcing her to look at you. Her eyes darkening and trembling under your commanding gaze. You leaned down, pulling her into a possessive kiss. Your tongues wrapping themselves around one another as she desperately pulled at your shoulder.

Once you pulled away Rosé was desperately gasping for air. You smirked as you leaned lower. Your hand weaved it's way through her blonde locks, tugging the strands so her head tilted back. You heard her breath hitch as you left kisses along the column of her neck, letting your teeth grace the mate mark you'd left months ago.

She let out a rather audible gasp. You quickly pulled away, making sure her members were still unaware of what you were doing to their vocalist. Upon learning you were still in the clear, you glared at her. The hand still in her hair tugged a little harder, making her groan softly. You leaned close to her ear, "If you want me to continue, you'll have to keep quiet for me. Do you understand?"

The timbre in your voice made her shudder, she nodded mindlessly wanting nothing more than you to touch her. You smiled wickedly biting down on her earlobe. "My good girl..." You trailed off, glaring at the scented fabric again. "...Now, be a good girl and take that fucking hoodie off."

Rosé looked down at the dark, offending fabric. "I-I-I'm not wearing anything un—" You growled, biting down on her neck. The omega bit her lip to prevent anything from coming out.

She stared at her three members, still blissfully unaware of what was happening just a little distance behind them. Your eyes stared into hers intently, a wave of heat washed through the omega as you whispered, "I will rip it off you if I have to. Take. It. Off."

No longer thinking of the idea of getting caught, she pulled the offending article of clothing off. You grinned before pulling her into your lap, your lips finding hers again. She whined softly, tugging at the shirt you were wearing. You pulled away, teeth tugging her lower lip back. Without a second thought, she pulled the t-shirt you wore over your head and pulled you close as you bit and sucked at her neck, leaving red and purple marks in your wake. Making sure your scent was all over her.

The young omega trembled in your arms as your hand slipped past her sweats and teased her center. You wore a devilish grin as you felt her grind down onto your hand. The hand that was free found it's way to her jaw, forcing her to stare at you while your hand made tight circles around her now erect clit.

Her mouth falling agape as you picked up the pace around her center. "I've barely done anything, Rosie...and you're already breathless." You taunted, pushing her underwear to the side, teasing her entrance slowly. She threw her head back and took your wrist in her hand, grinding down with a passion. Her eyes screwed shut as you began to piston your fingers roughly into her pussy.

You saw that your mate's eyes went wide, mouth hanging open with a vein popping out in her throat. You grinned, challenging the pace you were already going at. Your hand began to ache but the blissful expression painted all over her face made it all worth it.

"B-Baby..." She whimpered softly, her hips slowing in their movements. You stared at her, silently waiting for her to speak, your fingers still pressing into her inner walls. "I...I want..." A soft groan cut her off as you pulled your fingers out of her cunt.

"What do you want, omega?" Rosé once again trembled and let out an almost helpless whimper. "Your knot. I want it, alpha. I want you to breed me. Please..." She begged, breathless and strained, in attempts to keep her voice low and unheard by her members.

You were suddenly acutely aware of how small the space around you was and just how tight your pants were. You leaned in close, your lips taking hers again in a hot kiss. Her arms wrapped around your neck, pulling you closer while your hand busied itself, releasing your throbbing member from its denim confines.

Chaeyoung stared at you, her eyes blown out and silently begging you for more. You plunged two fingers into her awaiting mouth. She choked your long digits momentarily before moaning softly. You leaned in close as you lined your member up to her dripping cavern.

"Never forget that you're mine." The singer nodded frantically, gagging on your fingers. "Now be a good girl and keep quiet for your alpha." You thrust up to which she bit down on your fingers in an attempt to keep silent despite the fact that you both had a sneaking suspicion you'd been found out. Frankly speaking though, you couldn't care less.

The idol was at this point lost in the pleasure of the friction your prick created in her center. She ground her hips down faster than she had earlier, chasing down the high like an addict. You grunted, feeling the knot at the base of your cock. It was almost embarrassing how quickly you'd reached the beginning of your climax. But with how sinful your mate looked. Blown out eyes, drool trickling down her chin from gagging on your fingers, the way her hair looked so tousled, and your smell mixed beautifully with hers.

Not a single trace of anyone other than you. You'd made your stake on her, and anyone who got a whiff of her would know it. You groaned softly as you felt her walls clench deliciously around your dick. The movement of your hips though never ceased, you doubled your effort. Feeling a satisfying 'pop' from your member, your mate released an unexpectedly loud whine before she fell on top of you.

You wanted to shrink up and die, there was no way the members or their managers didn't hear that. You heard Jisoo clear her throat uncomfortably. Your mate, completely blissed out merely mumbled a shy and barely audible, "Sorry about that..."

"You can just burn that hoodie, I kind of don't want it after what happened back there..." Lisa muttered, a protective arm wrapped around Jennie who was practically sewn onto her alpha's side. You chuckled softly, pulling Rosé, who was in a blissful and sleepy daze, closer. Pressing a soft and loving kiss over her temple.

Sleepily, Rosé placed light kisses over your neck. "The embarrassment is worth that fucking high..." She mumbled against your sweaty skin. You chuckled and nodded. "I love you, N/n...And you never need to feel jealous."

"I know, you're my good girl after all."

it was a little rough but i'm still getting back into the swing of writing smut HAHAHA i'll get back to my usual writing confidence once i get into the writing spirit again, but i hope this came out the way everyone wanted it to HAHAHA anyway, i hope yall enjoyed this and are keeping safe. with everything going on in the world, it's a pretty shit time to be alive but i genuinely hope you're all powering through. you're all loved and i'll see you all very soon 💓

[inriospocket]

last request for now i promise! i love the idea of y/n as rio’s girlfriend meeting his family for the first time officially as his girl after he feels like she’s the one. she encounters nick and he ends up asking rio if she could be his plus at a charity benefit and rio’s just like “nah.” and then nick says “always taking what i want” which is what i think he says in the scene while they’re eating in the bar? SO NOW as the family trying

*ask continued* to eat, make small talk, and find out how in the hell rio could have landed home girl, he’s hella protectively jealous now especially since his girl and brother/cousin whatever tf is having a charming conversation and rio’s just seething 🙃. also the idea of this moment seeping into a few days of rio only being cordial with her and keeping her at bay /being assertive to her @ work intrigues me especially if either nick stops by their shared home since he knows it’ll get on rio nerves/or he catches y/n trying out dresses with the notion of attending this event with nick bc she doesn’t underdtand the big deal (+she likes when rio’s possessive but obvi not like this?) and rio’s mad mad but not at her😅. feel free to do whatever you’d like with this. it mostly sounds like angst and possessiveness so can you mush everything together if it’s easier for you.

-

❀❤ enjoy!!

word count ♡ 1,237

summary ♡ Rio finally takes reader to meet his family but tensions rise as Nick invites reader to a charity benefit.

warnings: possessiveness, aggressive behavior, fighting

situation ♡ angsty

-

You could already see how tight-knit his family was when you and Rio both walked into his grandma’s house. So much laughter and shared conversations. It eased your nervousness until they started staring once you walked in.

You started to feel a bit insecure but Rio knew they were just staring at how beautiful you were. As cocky as he was, even a little part of him wondered how he got you.

“Close your mouths before flies get in!” You heard an older woman coming from the kitchen. You saw the resemblance between her and Rio and figured this was his grandma.

You smiled when she first came up to Rio and kissed his cheek before hugging you next. “You must be Y/N. It’s so nice to meet you, carino.”She smiled.

“Likewise.” You hugged her back.

Before sitting down for dinner, Rio introduced you to everyone individually, letting you get comfortable.

You started to connect all the characteristics that Rio had to his family. There was a lot of subtle influences but you finally figured out why Rio was the way he was.

Nick.

“You’re not going to introduce me?” Nick asked Rio, smiling towards you. You could feel the tension coming from Rio.

“Y/N, Nick. My cousin.” He said, reaching for the bowl with the rice.

“Brother.” He corrected, giving him a cold stare.

“Cousin.” Rio corrected again, dumping a ladle full of rice on your plate.

“Nice to meet you.” You said, trying to ignore the quiet battle between the two.

You continued answering questions that everyone had for you. What you did, where you met, etcetera.

“Oh, you’re a councilman.” You said to Nick after he was discussing a city issue that no one could seem to solve.

“I am.” He said, noticing your intrigue. You started to engage yourself in the conversation, giving pointers on the issue that no one had thought of yet.

Rio was proud that you had so much knowledge and insight about every topic but he knew Nick and this conversation made him seethe. He hated that everything he had, whoever he had, Nick always wanted it.

“I like this one, Rio,” Nick laughed.

Rio narrowed his eyes at him. “Yeah, I do too.” He said and you could feel the tension rising again.

“Say, Y/N. There’s a charity benefit next weekend. Why don’t you come?” Nick asked. He was charming, you noticed. Too charming and you realized that there was an underlying evil lurking.

“Oh, um...” You didn’t know what to say. You were so taken aback that he would make a subtle pass at you in front of Rio.

“Always want what I have, huh?” Rio pursed his lips. You saw Rio’s grandma shake her head subtly.

“Always get it too.” Nick smiled.

The next couple of days following and you noticed Rio distancing himself from you but also being unusually possessive.

“Rio, it’s just a benefit. Your grandma even asked if we were going to be there.” You said, placing the call on speaker while you tried on another dress.

“I’m not going to that shit and you aren’t either.” He said, his tone letting you know how serious he was.

You rolled your eyes. “What’s up with you? Your grandma’s expecting us so we’re going Rio.” You said showing him that you can be serious.

“I’m not going to say it again.” He said, getting more upset.

“You’re not my dad, Rio.” You shook your head as he laughed in response.

“That’s not what you were saying the other night.” You could hear his smirk through the phone and kissed your teeth.

“I’ll see you when you get home.” You said before ending the call.

You examined the dress in the mirror and decided to just take it off but before you could, you heard a knock at the door.

You hurried to open it and was taken aback to see Nick standing there. He made a quick glance at the way the dress hugged you before you said something.

“What are you doing here?” You asked.

You noticed how Rio’s smirk was not just a him thing. It ran in the family and also meant that Nick was up to no good.

“Just picking up a package.” He said as he invited himself in, scanning the room around you.

“Oh, well Rio isn’t home right now.” You said, closing the door behind him.

He didn’t seem to mind waiting and you started to wonder what his ulterior motive was. “Oh, the issue we were discussing the other night. What you said surprisingly worked.” He told you.

You smiled proudly and you were just about to say something before you heard the door open indicating Rio was home.

You felt the tension in the room similar to the other day. Rio hid it as much as he could but he wanted so badly to put his hands on Nick. His house, his girlfriend. Everything sacred to him belonged here and Nick still found a way to weasel in.

You told Rio he was here to pick up a package.

“I told you I would give it to you myself." Rio said, dropping his keys. “Well, I was in the neighborhood.” He smiled.

"Your business is on the other side of town.” He said, not buying his story. “Like I said, I’ll give you the package.” He said, emphasizing that it was time for him to go.

Nick laughed to himself and walked to the door to leave. He turned towards you.

“You should go with the red.” He said, hinting towards one of the dresses you tried on. You already saw it coming but you were too far away to stop it.

You flinched once you saw the punch landing on Nick’s jaw.

“Rio!” You called before Nick threw a punch back near his eye. You contemplated how you were going to try to stop their fighting.

You knew it was a possibility of you getting hurt but you tried your best to put your body between them to stop their fists.

“Stop now! Stop!” You yelled, trying to push Rio away. Luckily, they had enough self-control to make sure they wouldn’t hit you and stopped.

“Nick, leave.” You told him. He shook his head while holding his jaw.

“You’re gonna regret that.” He said once more before he left for good.

You pushed Rio, visibly upset with him. “What’s wrong with you?!” You yelled again.

“Y/N, Nick is not trying to hear your opinions on gun control. Dude’s showing up to my crib knowing I’m not home, trying to get you to some charity benefit because he wants you.” He explained, wincing at the soreness in his face.

“I don’t see the big deal.” You said and walked to the freezer to get an ice pack.

“I know you ain’t slow, Y/N.” He said feeling like you weren’t even listening.

You walked back over to him and held the ice to his face, holding it there. “I don’t see how it’s a big deal when you and I both know he can’t have me. You’re so wrapped up in your head that you don’t even realize he’s already succeeding in pissing you off.” You said.

You could see Rio’s defeat. “Yeah, exactly. Look at you.” You rolled your eyes at his blackening eye.

“Sounds like you might be the slow one, dumbass.” You laughed.

[dakotafinely]

Thank you for writing my request!! I enjoyed the twist you put on it!

But like....now I’m curious about when April’s parents finally DO meet splinter and the bois- would she recognize Raph? I assume she’d recognize splinter bc I mean cmon rat man but Raph has gotten so much bigger than when she first saw him

Would you be willing to write that too? 🥺

YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH I WAS HOPING YOU'D ASK THAT AKSNSOSNDIFLENEHFODND!!

ALSO THANK YOU I HAD SO MUCH FUN WRITING THE REQUEST!!

Also, before we get into it. April has two mom’s and I don't take criticism on that. The one that met Raph & Splinter will be referred to as Mama/Ma while the other will be referred to as Mom/Mother.

--

Most of the time, it was just April and her mama. Her mom with a job that caused her to travel often. Sometimes unexpectedly.

“But, the guys really want to meet you!” April begged, despite knowing her mother couldn’t get out of it if she wanted to. Her mother lightly kissed her forehead, before returning to pack her suitcase.

“I know honey, and I’d love to meet them too,” She stops to focus and folding a shirt and putting in the suitcase “but I have to go, they need me down in Texas for the week. I promise if I can make it back before Sunday I’ll try to with all my might.” She turns to her daughter. Placing both hands on her face with a gentle smile on her own.

“You know I wouldn’t do this if I didn’t have to,” she says and April sighs. Knowing she was right.

“Just... try and make it back as soon as possible,” It was April’s last plea. To which her mother turned back to the suitcase to zip it up. Putting it with the other one and looking to April. Her eyes shining with honesty.

“You know I always do,” she responded. Leaving about ten minutes later.

Saturday came, and April knew her mother wasn’t coming in time. Still, the guys at least meeting one of her mom’s oughta satisfy their curiosity just a bit.

Sunday came and April’s mama was running around like a chicken with her head cut off. Trying to prepare the house as much as possible before they came. April tried to calm her down. The speed reminiscent of a freight train.

“Mama please, trust me when I say they’re not going to care if it’s not perfect,” April said with a slight whine. Still, in a flurry she went. Tidying up things the boy’s wouldn’t have even seen to begin with. Like closets and bedrooms.

“Well I’ll care,” her mama retorted. Slowly running out of steam as it become one hour before they would arrive. Hair tied up and fizzled, clothes stained with deep cleaning messes. She huffed as she looked at herself.

“I’m taking a shower,” she told April “put the chicken in the oven when the-”

“When the timer goes off, I know.”

--

“I still don’t know why we have to wear clothes,” Raph spoke up as Donnie and Leo admired themselves in a shared mirror. Lightly pushing each other to get a better view. Raph huffed and smoothed out the red cardigan he put on for the 50th time “we never wear clothes any other time!” he said.

“Yeah, but,” Mikey slid up next to him, adjusting the snappers tie “it’s to make a good impression! We’re mutants, we gotta do something to make her feel at ease.”

“Her?” Raph asked.

“Oh yeah, I forgot you weren’t in the room,” Donnie spoke up, finally leaving the mirror before the pushing got to violent between the twins. Leo falling over with a yelp at the unexpected movement of the soft-shell “April’s other mom couldn’t make it back home in time. We’re only meeting one of her parents,” Donnie explained, looking relaxed in the suit, as if he could wear it all the time.

“But still!” Leo spoke up, popping up next to his twin as though he hadn’t just fallen “It’ll be nice to meet at least one of her parents,” he said “for a hot second there I thought we’d never meet either of ‘em!” Leo crossed his arms and sat with a happy smile. Also looking comfortable in his clothes.

“I’m just glad we finally have a reason to use these cardigans!” Mikey said, gesturing to his orange one. Raph looked back to the mirror, looking down at the red cardigan. Mikey had taken time to tailor it to Raph’s measurements, it would’ve been a true shame to let it go unused.

“Alright my sons!” Splinter emerged from his room. The boys stared at him, his suit looking dapper, a sight unusual for the boys. He held a brightly wrapped gift in his hands. Clearly spending most of his time on it as the bow on top was complex and beautiful. He grinned “Let’s go!”

--

As the hours had become mere minutes. A dread filled April’s stomach. She’d yet to tell her mom’s the truth about her friends. But she knew if she didn’t do it now she’d be asking for disaster later.

“Mama,” April said, mouth dry as she didn’t really look at her. April’s mama looked from the table she was decorating. Concern following her features as she saw the way her daughter was standing.

“What’s wrong baby?” She moved, stopping her task and put a hand on April’s shoulder. Using the other to move April’s face gently to make April face her. April looked nervous, with a mixture of fear. The type of fear you feel when you believe you’re about to be rejected.

“There’s... something I gotta tell you about my friends.” April said “Before they get here, so you can be ready.” She continued, studying her mama’s facial expression. It was mainly confused.

“What is it? What-” A lightbulb went over her head “Oh! Are they gang members? Is that why you’ve been out all hours of the night because April-”

“No!” April spoke a laugh of disbelief, relaxing a bit. Mama relaxed a bit as well, that was her worst fear. The last thing she would ever wish on her daughter is to be swept in something as dangerous as a gang. Especially with some of the very...  bizarre ones in New York.

“Well, then whatever it is will be alright with me,” Mama said letting go of her daughter. Despite the concern on April’s face, as if there could be something worse in her mind then gang members. Mama smiled reassuringly “You can tell me, I promise it won’t make me think any less of your friends,” she added, wanting to let her daughter have open space to talk about anything.

April opened her mouth, when the doorbell rang.

“Oh! Well speak of the devil’s then,” Mama spoke with a small chuckle, already moving to open the door.

“Wa- wait! Maybe I should get it!” April began to protest. To which Mama simply shook her head as she placed her hand on the doorknob.

“Nonsense April,” Mama said, already opening the door, “I’d love to-” She stopped as her eyes landed on the five mutants in front of her. Recognizing one almost immediately. Eyes wide and mouth agape as she stared at him again for the first time in years.

Splinter couldn’t help but have the same expression. Feeling as though he’d been thrown into the past. Recognizing the woman, her long thick curls draped down her shoulders had light grey hair’s decorated inside them. She didn’t seem as slim as she was all those years ago. But the gentleness was still evident in creases around her eyes.

Her eyes flicked up. Four, there were four turtles. And despite the fact she hadn’t used the information for years. She still was able to identify each one of them with a glance.

A red-eared slider, a box turtle, a soft-shell, and-

“You!” Splinter and Mama said almost at the same time. Mama taking a step back as she pointed to the Snapper.

April finally snapped out of her horror as she had awaited her mama’s response. Becoming confused by the reaction.

“Wait, you know Raph?” She asked walking behind her mama. April’s mama put a hand over her mouth.

“Pop’s... you know her?” Raph asked leaning down, not-so-subtly whispering behind his hand. Having been to young to truly remember the trauma he’d gone through.

“Well, uh, can we at least come inside?” Leo finally said after a beat of silence. Earning an elbow from Donnie “What? She knows Raph! Or pop’s at least...” Leo trailed before realizing something.

“Wait, is she the one you meet when getting Raph back!?” Is what Leo would’ve said, if Mikey hadn’t said it first. April’s eyes went wide with the realization as well. And Donnie and Raph seemed a bit flabbergasted.

“I- uh, come in!” Mama finally snapped, swinging the door right open. There was a lot of explaining to do...

Eventually, everyone had settled. Sitting at the table as the last of the food cooked.

April looked to her mama, awaiting an explanation.

“It was... before you were born. I’d joined this sort of hunting group as a way to make quick cash. They’d needed a turtle and tortoise expert. And I was it.” April’s mama began. Hands on her lap as everyone leaned into the story.

“I didn’t go on many trips. Just a couple, I didn’t know what they did with the animals they caught. I always thought it was a capture and release type of thing. Since I only was really there to examine the capture and take notes before just, being on my way. But..” She took a deep breath “during one mission, they’d actually decided to let me stay from start to finish and...” Mama looked up to Raph with a small smile “that’s where I met you,” she said.

--

“Look what I caught!” A hunter said holding up a small turtle by it’s tail. The group gathered round to get a better look at the creature. But she was the only one who truly took notice of weird things about it. How it held it’s claw like a hand, whimpering in pain as it looked around. With eyes that shone of a bright mind, curious about the world. And unusual, toddler like form.

“Well O’Neil?” A hunter asked, lightly knocking her shoulder. Snapping her out of her study. They lightly gestured with their head to the turtle “what kind is it?”

“Uh,” O’Neil shook her head and took a closer look. Holding the turtle with care, making the other hunters snicker at her compassion. She ignored it as she flipped the turtle on it’s stomach, feeling the sharp edges of it’s shell. She turned it back and opened it’s mouth. Tiny hands pawing at the unwanted intrusion, but she saw the sharp curve of it’s beak. Clearly made for tougher meats. Of course, this one was easy, she probably could’ve guessed if she really wanted to “Ah, Alligator Snapper Turtle... which is unusual for this area.” She said.

It took everything in her not to take it back as a hunter ripped it from her arms like a lifeless doll. Laughing a bit as they put him close to their face, slightly sneering at it.

“Really now? Why don’t we cage this lil’ fella and sell ‘em?” They said lightly tossing him from arm to arm. The snapper letting out whines and distressed whimpers. O’Neil was in to much shock at the action to move to action as the others around her laughed.

Until the hunter let out a pained scream. Dropping the snapper with a slur of curses. Backing away as bit. The snapper had begun to get up and try and run. O’Neil noted, that it was on two feet and not all four, before someone else crushed him under their foot.

“That- that fucker bit off my finger!” The hunter screamed in horror as another went to grab the med kit from one of the tents. O’Neil’s eyes widened as she saw the little turtle spit it from his mouth, clearly in distaste.

It was after that O’Neil still had to watch them throw him in cage. But, he drew blood, heck he almost at a whole finger. They couldn’t release him back into the wild. Not with the taste of human blood now his system.

It took two more days for O’Neil to properly realize that it was simply self-defense. With no more incidents occurring, and the snapper unable to eat anything raw without immediately spitting it back out. The poor sucker was starving.

“Maybe he’ll eat the jerky,” O’Neil made the mistake of commenting it aloud as she watched poor turtle suffer in his cage. Whimpering out in hunger, sitting in the corner every time another human would walk by.

“Aww, what’s the matter little guy? Ya hungry?” The hunter he’d bit a few days ago spit out. Clearly begin sarcastic as he threw a piece of jerky out of the cages reach. Still, the naive snapper had went after it. Trying to paw at it from inside the cage.

The laughter surrounding her was sickening. It made her want to cover her ears and shout at them to stop. But she couldn’t. Instead she used her foot to nudge the jerky within reach.

Waiting a few minutes before dumping her bag inside the cage. She didn’t like the jerky that much anyways. She couldn’t help but watch with a smile as the snapper filled his stomach. A satisfied churr coming from him as he smiled back up at her.

That was it, she had to get him out of here.

Under the cover of the evening. She’d volunteered to do night patrols, in case something or someone tried to invade the camp. A shudder crawled through her spine at the idea. What could they’ve been doing to make other people come after them?

Still, once she was sure everyone was asleep. She went to the cage, crouching down in front of it. Relieved to see the Snapper crawl towards her instead of away. This would make it much easier. And despite the darkness, she could see his eyes. Shining with child-like joy and wonder.

“You’re not like the others are you little guy?” She cooed, trying to be as gentle as possible to not startle him. The snapper churred in response, curious but cautious. He understood her. She couldn’t help but smile wider.

“Yeah, I didn’t think so. I’ve seen snappers before and you don’t really look it,” She continued, before letting out an awkward chuckle. He did sort of look like a snapper, that’s why she was able to identify him in the first place “I mean,” she corrected herself “you do kinda, but not really if you get what I mean.”

A confused churr, but he leaned against the door of the cage. Silently asking to be let out.

“Yeah... sorry,” she said, opening the cage door. The snapper immediately went into her arms. Snuggling into the warmth and safety of them. The moon finally coming out from behind the clouds for her to see him properly.

Perfect, now was the time to-

As she’d turned to run off, she saw a rat. A large rat, wearing a worn down robe and looking as though he hadn’t slept in days. She couldn’t do much of anything beside stare. And the creature stared back.

The Snapper began to chrip happily, seeming to recognize the thing in front of her. She kept him balanced, still afraid of handing him off to someone. Within four days, it seemed she’d adopted the snapper.

But when the rat gently lifted his arms. Staring at the snapper with adoration and worry and hope. Hands shaking just a bit as though he could will him into his arms. O’Neil knew she was defeated.

She relented the child. With slow movements as to not scare either of them. The rat took him quickly and carefully. Hugging him like his own son, quietly sobbing with shoulder shaking violently. Oh dear, how long had he been looking for the kid?

“Go,” her voice was much hoarser then she would’ve liked, but there was no time for her to care. The rat looked to her, as if he completely forgot he was there to begin with. She couldn’t help but glance at the tents, afraid of waking up the others was lighting in her skin “if you want to get out of here with him now. You need to go,” she whispered. The rat nodded and with no words. Rushed off, leaves in the up kick at his unexpected speed.

She relaxed, until she heard a branch snap.

“O’Neil?” A hunter spoke up, clearly groggy from begin so easily awakened “Is that you making a racket?”

“Yeah, yeah,” she tried to sound as confident as possible. Not wanting to raise suspicion and make them aware of their escapee sooner then necessary “just go back to sleep, thought I heard something but I was wrong.”

She stood frozen in place. Waiting for a response. Before relaxing after a beat or so.

--

“Wait! What happened after!?” Mikey asked excitedly, immersed in the story. She couldn’t help but let out a chuckle at his enthusiasm.

“Oh, I quit. A month later we got you,” She booped her daughters noise. Making April giggle a bit and shy away. Mama sighed and leaned back against her chair. More at ease with the story out there.

“I always thought you guys ran far away from here,” she commented looking to Splinter “I’m surprised to see you’ve stayed, and gained three more turtles in the process.”

With that, the timer beeped. And everyone helped move the food for them to dig into.

--

I hope this one’s good! I feel kinda iffy about the ending but it seems like a good place to end it. I had fun playing more with this concept! I’d like to think the guys and April’s history went deeper then even they realized. (I kinda like doing that with ALL my characters, it’s so much fun to interweave them!)

This was a lot of fun! Thank you for sending me the ask!!

[moeruhoshi]

Hi! I hope you're doing well. Idk if you're taking requests but I had this cute idea where little dragon Natsu ends up really liking his teacher Anna (lucy's aunt) bc he smells Lucy on her but Natsu's not able to really understand that so he just knows he likes this teacher (this is based off of that one scene at the end in the anime). And then Anna brings Lucy to school with her bc no one can watch over her. Then Natsu sees Lucy and it all just clicks 👀🥰🥰

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES

“Natsu,” Anna laughed as her little student smothered his face against the legs of her long skirt. “You have to go home, no more clinging to me, okay?”

“But Miss Anna smells really good,” The fledgling whined, using the little bit of strength in his hands to try and stay attached. His father sighed and pulled him by his waist, rolling his eyes when his son began to glare at him.

“Come on, Natsu,” Igneel grumbled and crouched down to his level. “Miss Anna has to go home too, and you’ll see her in the morning,”

“Okay...” He huffed, letting his weirdly strong grip on her go. His eyes glazed up at the smiling woman, his heart not so subtly skipping a beat. “G-Goodnight, Miss Anna!”

“Goodnight, Natsu,” She giggled and waved off the small boy who kept his eyes glued to her form as his father carried him away. He sighed lovingly, resting his head on Igneel’s shoulder. His tail had come out on its own, wagging behind him and slightly smacking his dad in the face.

“N-Natsu!” He sputtered, holding the appendage down. “You do this everyday, can’t you calm down already?”

“Nope!” He grinned as his tired father rolled his eyes, taking off into the air with his miniature prodigy.

Grandine greeted them at the door with a finger to her lips, holding Natsu’s younger sister in her arms.

“I just got Wendy to fall asleep so please be quiet,” She glared, bouncing the baby gently before going back into the house.

“But I wanted to tell mama about school today,” Their son pouted as he pulled off his shoes.

“You can at dinner, alright? But for now, you can sit and watch television.” Igneel ushered the little fire dragon into the living room, making sure the volume was just above two as he left Natsu by his lonesome.

He wandered upstairs to find his wife, Grandine gently putting Wendy to rest in her crib.

He carefully wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her cheek, chuckling lowly as she melted into his hold.

“I love having babies, but I swear, no more,” She shook her head furiously. “Wendy’s sensitivity to sound is...ugh, I just forgot that this is something we’d have to deal with while she’s still so young,”

“Me too,” Igneel sighed, the both of them carefully exiting the room as Wendy cooed in her sleep. “But that might not be the worst of our problems,”

“What do you mean? Natsu’s not fighting at school again, is he?” She groaned, following her husband down the stairs.

“No, hes just very attatched to his teacher. It’s the way she smells, he wouldn’t let her go when I went to pick him up,”

“Oh gosh, that doesn’t sound good,” She pursed her lips and turned to face him. “But there’s nothing else weird about the way he’s acting, is there? I don’t think we need to be worried unless he starts getting possessive or antsy without her around.”

“You’re right, but I swear I’m going to lose it if his instincts wake up early while we’re dealing with Wendy’s hearing,”

“Worst case scenario, we can just send her to stay with my mother for a little while.”

The worst case scenario would prove to be a reality for the Dragneel family as the years went on, but the next day of school was the beginning of the worst of it.

It wasn’t until a dragon reached their adolescence that their instincts woke within them, making it much easier for the parent to walk their child through the understanding of their own body.

And it wasn’t completely unheard of for a dragon to meet his mate early on in life. The only worry that came along with said encounter was a possible, accidental marking. It was hard to tell a child to fight off that kind of urge, especially when it was such an overpowering voice in their mind telling them to do so. And without proper supervision, there was no telling what might happen. It was only when the aftermath occurred, that things went haywire.

Sure, an older dragon could stand being away from their mate for however long they needed to be, were mature enough to understand that it was just a part of life. But for someone so young, they’d whine and cry like you had just taken their favorite bear away. And a baby dragon would have no issue with destroying everything around them in efforts to get what was theirs back at their side.

When Natsu walked through the doors of his preschool, he was quick to run from his father's side and into the open arms of his teacher waiting to greet him.

Igneel watched with a steady smile, but took it as a good sign when all Natsu did was take in a big whiff of her skirt before skipping off to find his friends.

He left for work feeling relatively secure with his assumptions, not knowing the madness he’d soon be faced with that evening.

When everyone had arrived, Anna clapped her hands and had all the students gather on a large and colorful carpet.

“Alright, so today is going to be a little different,” The teacher started, staring into the excited and few wandering eyes. “We have someone joining us today! I want you to make her feel super welcome, because she’s my niece! Everyone, I’d like you to meet Lucy!”

A little blonde girl, not much taller than the rest of them, appeared as if out of nowhere from behind Miss Anna’s skirt.

She waved her small hand and blushed in embarrassment, not used to so many people looking at her all at once.

Natsu, who always sat at the front of the carpet, felt his heart begin to pound. He stared at Lucy with wide eyes and felt a grin split before he knew it.

She was the source of Miss Anna’s hypnotic smell, why hadn’t he met her until now? If Miss Anna knew that she smelled so good, wouldn’t she have brought her here sooner?!

He wanted to stand up and tackle her in a hug, but he knew Miss Anna wouldn’t like it if he interrupted her outside of recess time.

“Lucy lives in Acalypha, but she’ll be here in Magnolia this week while her parents are out of town,” Their teacher said, everyone excitedly waving and saying hi. Though Gray tried not to look too excited about a new friend when he saw Juvia staring relentlessly at him.

“We’ll start this morning with arts and crafts, okay? So go sit at your usual tables,” She said, allowing the bunch of toddlers to stand and find their way to their seat. “Natsu, could I ask you to do a very special thing for me?”

“Uh huh! I can do anything, Miss Anna!” He chirped, practically bouncing as he stood in place.

“Could I ask you to look after Lucy while she’s here?” She asked, crouching down to push her little niece a little closer to the dragon. “She’ll need a good friend to show her the ropes, don’t you think so?”

“Mhm! Just trust me, Luce! I’ll be your bestest friend ever!” Natsu said excitedly, reaching out to grab her by the hand.

“O-Okay,” Lucy squeaked a bit as he pulled her along with him, showing her to his table and the others that sat with him. 

It would have been more obvious as to what was going on if Natsu was more rambunctious, but he was the epitome of calm. Though that really should have set off at least one alarm. Since when was that fire dragon ever this well behaved?

He was kind and didn’t come on too strongly, in the way that he would have towards Gray or Erza. Instead, he was clear and coherent in his usage of words, or as clear as a six year old was able to get.

When Lucy looked like she was confused, he helped her out with instructions or ran off to collect the materials she really wanted to use. Miss Anna would have paid more mind to this if she hadn’t had to focus her attention on one of the more upset students. It was Millianna, as usual, crying over her inability to be at home with her pet cat.

Natsu made sure she got to know his friends too once it was time for recess, the little blonde hitting it off right away with Levy and Cana. Erza was a bit embarrassed to meet someone knew, but warmed up to Lucy’s sweet smile in no time. Juvia...well Juvia was alright the rest of the day since Gray agreed to hold her hand. And Gajeel was always nonchalant, not caring about what was going on...unless Levy was scolding him.

At lunch, if anyone had the ability to notice, would have seen Natsu absolutely swooning from his seat across from Lucy.

He sighed lovingly and pushed his round cheeks up with his hands, leaning forward on them to admire her. She was in the middle of talking about her favorite book to the pixie beside her, Erza and Cana both fumbling to tie her hair in loose braids. They swore they could do it as good as Miss Anna could. 

Once she looked his way, his heart began skipping, his cheeks became flushed, and his adrenaline; well Natsu didn’t really understand that feeling. He really liked the way she looked at him though. 

Lucy laughed and picked a grain of rice that rested on his cheek, popping it between her lips as she stole it from him. 

Uwah...

During nap time, he couldn’t help himself anymore. Lucy absolutely, one hundred percent, needed to sleep by his side. 

Not that she complained. Rather, she was excited that someone else was just as excited to be her friend. 

Natsu smothered his nose against her cheek and fell asleep, holding her like he did his dragon-bear at home. Lucy liked that he was warm and snuggly, like her doggy, Plue. 

That was the first memory of the best sleep he’d ever gotten in his life. And any nap he had at her side in the future would count as well.

When his dad came by at the end of the day...it’s a good thing that everything indoors was magic-proofed. 

Lucy had been in a separate room at the time so she was spared the sight of a mad-raving, fire-spewing and burning, fledgling have to be dragged out of the school.

There was something inside of him that screamed, felt pain beyond what pain had meant. 

No no no no no no no no!

It drove him practically literally insane. It pounded in his brain, in every nerve end and even more so. It was as if he left his heart behind and all that could replace it was rage. 

Needless to say that Wendy and Grandine were out of the house before Igneel got anywhere near them.

Sleeping spells worked, if only for the night. It was spine-chilling to see him so catatonic in the morning. Like all that fire from the night before was all he had, that the flame that rested at the pit of his stomach couldn’t be lit again. 

But when Natsu came back to school and saw Lucy standing there, waving with the cutest grin ever on her face, well...Igneel probably the only one who got upset.

“Anna,” He sighed and wiped a tired hand over his face. “We need to talk, if you have the time right now,”

[slapshot-to-the-heart]

Death by a Thousand Cuts - j. debrusk

Trying to venture into some new territory, let me know what you think! Title’s from the Taylor Swift song. 4.8k of post-breakup Jake DeBrusk angst, as always, I love hearing feedback! I read all the tags, so feel free to reblog, pop into my inbox, anything!

Wine pairing from someone with zero authority on the subject: a full-bodied Syrah - smooth, fruity, the kind of wine I’d want to drink if I was sad. 

My heart, my hips, my body, my love/Trying to find a part of me you didn’t touch

Shadi threw back another shot, wincing as the vodka burned down her throat. Clara rubbed her back sympathetically. “Better?” She shrugged. Alcohol was great for forgetting things, but there were some wounds too fresh and too deep for even a Sazerac to cure. And her wounds were named Jake DeBrusk.

Jake had been her everything, still was her everything, and the idea that she was somehow now in charge of forgetting everything they had shared was more than she could bear. Breakups weren’t something Shadi took lightly, and especially when she had spent the past year falling more in love with him with each breath she took. Forgetting more than a year’s worth of early-morning conversations in his bed, Jake’s hand gently brushing back her hair before kissing her temple and going out to the kitchen to start the coffee pot. Shadi couldn’t start her day without coffee. A year’s worth of games, up in the box with the other WAGs and down in the tunnel, their lips crashing together in the euphoria of a post-win high. A year’s worth of vacations, to Edmonton to visit his family and Dallas to see hers, laying on the white sand beaches of Tahiti in the summer. A year’s worth of falling asleep to him tracing lines between the freckles on her bare back in the glow of the post-sex fog. It wasn’t like she was going to forget any of it anytime soon. And if Shadi was being honest with herself, it wasn’t like she wanted to. 

---

Shadi met Jake just after moving into her new apartment with Clara, her best friend from BC, when they decided to celebrate their newfound jobs and independence with a bar crawl. As luck would have it, they never actually made it past the first one. Clara had just finished up her first week as a tenth grade English teacher, and Shadi had the weekend to relax before her marketing analytics post started on Monday. 

She wasn't going out to meet someone, not really, but if there was someone attractive enough and charming enough she wasn’t absolutely opposed to spending the night in a bed that wasn’t her own. Shadi sat at the bar, responding to a few texts and sipping her drink as she waited for Clara to return from the bathroom. She wasn’t paying enough attention to her surroundings to notice someone sidle up next to her, getting a little too close for comfort. “Hey,” he said loudly, startling her. Shadi looked up — way up, he was at least six or seven inches taller than her 5’5 — to the stranger’s face, flashing a tight smile. She didn’t know any women who particularly liked to be accosted in the middle of a drink. 

“Hey,” she said. 

He inched closer. “I’m Darren, nice to meet you.”

As much as she’d really just like to be able to tell the guy to fuck all the way off, Shadi hated that it was a far better decision for her safety and security to just try and tacitly go along with it. Let him down easy. 

“Shadi,” she responded. 

He whistled, and she internally cringed, trying as subtly as she could to look towards the bathrooms and trying to spot Clara. More than once, they had pretended to be a couple at bars to get each other out of situations exactly like this one. “Shadi,” he said, testing out the name. “What is that? Arabic? Indian?”

Now she visibly cringed, raising her eyebrows. Great, he’s racist as well as a creep. “Neither. I’m Persian.” 

“Cool, super cool,” he said, nodding. “So, Shadi, what brings you here?”

“Starting a new job next week,” she said, looking back down at her phone, trying to give him just enough information to keep him from being pissed at her. 

Darren finished his drink. “That’s cool, yeah. Good for you. I work in finance. High-level account managing and stuff. It’s a lot of responsibility, but I like the challenge.” Great, add finance bro to the list of reasons why I’ll never go home with this guy, Shadi thought. 

“Nice,” Shadi said, looking away and taking a sip of her drink and trying her damndest to make it clear she wasn’t interested. 

Darren moved even closer, his hand now resting on her waist as Shadi leaned as far away from him as she could while still staying on her seat, looking frantically around for Clara, or anyone, to bail her out. “You come here with anyone?”

“Uh, yeah,” Shadi said nervously, eyes still sweeping the room. “My boyfriend should be around here somewhere.” Darren didn’t need to know she didn’t have a boyfriend, and as much as she hated that men like him were more likely to leave her alone if they thought she was spoken for than if she told him herself she wasn’t interested, it was the best thing she could do in the moment. 

Darren took a cursory glance around the room. “I don’t see anyone coming,” he noted. “You sure about that, Shadi?

“Yes,” she squeaked, as his hand tightened around her waist and she froze like a deer in headlights, too stiff to flag down the bartender.

“It’s polite to look at people when they’re talking to you, or did they not teach that where you’re from?” 

Shaking, she turned back to look at him. “I’m from Texas,” she spat. 

“I think we could really have some fun together, if you’d just stop being so uptight we could really—” Darren didn’t get the chance to finish his sentence, his arm being forcefully removed from her waist. She swung around, meeting the eyes of her unknown savior, who was too busy glaring at the man across from her to even meet her eyes. 

“Seems like you’re having a hard time taking no for an answer,” he said. 

Darren looked up, rubbing his wrist from where it had been in a vice grip only moments before. “You the boyfriend?”

The other man didn’t even flinch. “Yeah, I’m the boyfriend. Even if I wasn’t, she clearly doesn’t want anything to do with you, but she’s just too polite to tell you to fuck off. Luckily,” he smirked. “I’m not.”

Darren rolled his eyes, grabbing his half-empty glass and inching away from the bar. “Whatever. Wouldn’t have been worth it anyways.” 

Shadi collapsed into her hands as soon as he was out of earshot, breathing shakily. The stranger reached out tentatively, rubbing her shoulder to comfort her. “You okay?”

She leaned back, taking another drink and nodding. “Yeah, yeah. I’ll be okay, it’s not like it’s the first time this has happened. He just really didn’t want to leave me alone and I couldn’t find my friend and he didn’t seem to be getting the message that I wasn’t interested.” 

He grimaced. “On behalf of my entire gender, I apologize for all the shitty men you have ever had to encounter.”

“Thank you,” she said, laughing slightly and setting her glass back down on the bar. “And thanks for stepping in, you really didn’t have to.”

He shook his head. “I just did what any decent guy would do. I’ve got a sister, girls deserve to feel safe in bars.”

“Regardless,” she added, “I appreciated it. And just so you know,” she said, pausing, “you don’t have to worry about an actual boyfriend coming around. I’ve just found it’s the easiest way for guys to leave me alone.” Shadi surprised herself; she wasn’t normally this bold. 

He dipped his head. “Good to know. Probably should properly introduce myself, then. Jake DeBrusk,” he said, sticking his hand out. 

“Shadi Azizi.” She shook it, smirking slightly as she took a sip of her drink. “I know.” 

He smiled bashfully, scratching his head. “Hockey fan?” 

She nodded. “I’ll go to Bruins games when I can make it, but I’m from Dallas, so…” she shrugged. 

“You’ve already sold your soul to the Stars,” Jake finished. 

Shadi laughed. “Yep. You can take the girl out of Texas, but you can’t take the Texas out of the girl.”

Jake eyed her glass, seeing that she was nearly finished. “Can I get you another?” Shadi nodded after a moment. “Sure.” He caught the bartender’s eye. “What are you drinking?” “Whiskey on the rocks.” Jake leaned back on his stool, clutching his hands over his chest. “A woman after my own heart.”

---

Three months later, it was November, and Shadi was in Jake’s kitchen, doling out Chinese takeout onto two plates. “Beer?” she asked over the counter, to where Jake was flopped on the couch, flipping through channels in hopes of finding something mildly interesting to watch.

“Yes please,” he shot back. He had just gotten back from a road trip that afternoon, eleven days in the Midwest, and there were few things he wanted more than to be back in Shadi’s arms. They had started a sort of unspoken tradition; Shadi had taken to spending the night whenever Jake came back from a road trip, and he wasn’t about to start complaining. He loved his job and he loved his team, but after a week or two of being around them practically 24/7, he didn’t want to waste any time getting back to her. 

Shadi padded back towards the living room, sliding a plate of lo mein and fried rice over to Jake, who leaned in and kissed her shoulder. “Thanks, babe,” he said, putting the remote down. “Parks and Rec good with you?”

She nodded, mouth full. “Doesn’t take much to convince me. I’d kill a man for Leslie Knope.”

Jake laughed. Shadi looked over at him, one eyebrow raised. “You think I’m joking?”

He held his free hand up in mock surrender, the other balancing his plate on the arm of the couch. “I should have known better. Will you ever forgive me?”

“Maybe,” Shadi said, scrunching up her nose. “I think I can find it somewhere deep in the recesses of my cold, dead heart.” 

Things between Jake and Shadi had gotten pretty serious pretty quickly, certainly more quickly than Jake was expecting. But, as he was realizing, that wasn’t exactly a bad thing. The scene was definitely more domestic than he was used to; it wasn’t unusual for him and Shadi to join some of their friends or the team for a night out at the bars or clubs, but it was just as common to have an evening in. It was nice, being together like this. Domesticity was never something that was quite his style, but as he thought, looking over at Shadi, who was entirely engrossed in Leslie’s valiant attempts to control a town hall meeting, maybe it could become his style.

You said it was a great love, one for the ages/But if the story’s over, why am I still writing pages?

It was the end of January, and Shadi was in Edmonton. Jake had told her about Boston’s bye week about two months earlier, the plan having originally been to drive up to New Hampshire for a week of camping in White Mountain. But then Jake had been selected for the All-Star Team, much to his surprise — not Shadi’s, who had been convinced he’d be picked practically since the season started —  and their schedule had been turned on its head. He had decided that it would make more sense to visit his family. Shadi didn’t complain; she had just started to get used to Boston winters, and wasn’t confident in her ability to go a week in a tent in the middle of January.

What surprised her, though, was when he invited her to come with him. She had never met his parents in person before. Over FaceTime, sure, but it wasn’t the same. Jake was initially very shy about extending the invitation, almost as if he wasn’t sure if that was something she wanted or was ready for. His concern was sweet, but Shadi was more touched that he had asked her to come in the first place, and put in her request for vacation time that night. 

The flight wasn’t much over six hours, a short layover in Montréal and one connection later and they landed in Edmonton. Shadi met up with Jake just outside of passport control, pulling her pea coat tightly around herself. “Ooh,” she said, breathing out shakily. “Bit chilly here, no?”

Jake laughed. Oh, if only she knew. “Wait till you get outside, babe. It’s January in the middle of Alberta.”

“How bad can it get?” Shadi asked naively. Pretty bad, as she found out the moment they stepped outside the terminal into the freezing air. She was suddenly very grateful her parka was in her bag, a Patagonia jacket that had been one of her first big purchases when she moved to Boston. Jake was having a very good fun time poking fun at her in the three minutes it took for his parents to pull up. 

“Aww, is my Texas girl cold? Is she having trouble dealing with real weather?”

Shadi glared at him. “Shut up.”

His parents were incredible, kind and welcoming from the moment they picked them up at the airport. They drove them back to Jake’s childhood home, where his sister greeted her with a hug. She had visited Boston a few weeks prior, her and Shadi immediately getting along thanks to their shared taste in coffee orders and music. They had swapped Spotify playlists more than one time since her visit. 

The week she spent in Edmonton was amazing. Even though she may have been a little bit apprehensive from the start, all of her worries were just distant memories by the time they had to get back on the plane. She had always been good with parents; whether it was her best friend or her boyfriend, they had always liked her. Making a good impression and being unfailingly respectful, especially to her elders, was a value that had been instilled in her from a young age. She had brought a tin of qurabiya on the plane as a gift for them, after a half-dozen Google searches to make sure she could bring them across the border and a twenty minute long phone call with her mom to make sure she was using the right type of almonds. They loved them, and seeing the tin already empty on the third day of her trip filled her heart.

“She’s really good for you, you know,” his mom said, as he was packing his suitcase for the flight back. “You’re still you, fun and spontaneous and caring. But you’re a more mature, thoughtful version of yourself. And I think that’s thanks to Shadi.”

Jake blushed, shoving his toothbrush in his toiletry bag. “She is. She’s great, Mom. We have so much fun together, and she really does bring out the best in me.” He paused for a moment. “I think I’m in love with her.”

His mom raised her eyebrows, not surprised and certainly not disappointed, but a little astonished that he had realized himself what she saw from the moment they had landed in Canada. She had just been waiting for him to admit it. “You do?” she asked, a hint of a smile on her face.

He nodded, more sure this time. “I’m in love with her, Mom.”

Quiet my fears with the touch of your hand/Paper cut stings from our paper-thin plans

“You doing okay, babe?” Clara asked gently, one hand on Shadi’s back as she nursed her third beer of the night. Shadi reached up to try and wipe away her tears. Thank God she hadn’t worn any mascara. She nodded, trying to flash her best friend a smile, but it didn’t meet her eyes. 

Shadi hadn’t ever been the kind of person to put up walls. That was Jake’s thing. But she was a great actress, and if Clara hadn’t known her as well as she did, she wouldn’t have been able to call her on it. 

“Bullshit, Shadi. You’re not fine and I know it. You know it.” God, Clara could read her like a book. It wasn’t okay, she wasn’t okay, and she sure as hell wasn’t over him. She didn’t know when she would be over him. If ever. 

They said that Rome wasn’t built in a day, but it burned in one. If Rome was a metaphor for their relationship, Shadi would say there’s never been a more accurate phrase. All it took was five minutes for Jake to break her heart, for the world they had built together to come crumbling apart around her. As much as she hated it, there was still a part of her that couldn’t help but try to look back on that night. Shadi almost called bullshit on him the moment he said he was breaking up with her, because he had never even brought it up before, and that’s not something you just drop on someone like he did, right? But she didn’t, she hadn’t gotten closure and hadn’t gotten a reason, an actual reason, and so any curly hair she saw out of the corner of her eye that night she kept hoping was Jake’s, and any cocky smile from some guy trying to buy her a drink — she’d let them, for the free alcohol, but they never got a conversation out of her — she kept wishing was his. 

---

It was September, and Shadi felt like she was walking on air. She and Jake had celebrated their one year anniversary a month ago, and things couldn’t be going better. Training camp for the new season had started, which had begun to take up more of his time than she maybe would have liked, but she was dealing with it. They both were. It was like Shadi had told him two months into their relationship, and countless times since: she knew what she was signing up for, knew that sometimes she would have to take a backseat to hockey, and she was okay with that. Having Jake some of the time was better than not having him at all. 

So when Jake had texted her that morning, asking if she was free to come over that night, she thought nothing of it. Well, scratch that, she thought a lot of it. It had been about two weeks since they had had a proper date night; while she loved him sneaking into her apartment to sleep for a few hours before he had to get up or meeting in the mornings for coffee and bagels, they were in desperate need of some alone time. Jake hadn’t exactly been distant since their anniversary, but it had definitely seemed like something was on his mind. And when she asked Clara, or her older sister Yasmin, or Hannah, her best friend in Houston, they all said the same thing. If nothing seemed like it was going wrong, but he was seeming distant, but they were still communicating, then there was really only one possibility, at least according to them. He was going to propose. 

So Shadi took a little longer in front of the mirror, put on her good jeans instead of just a pair of sweats, ran a comb through her hair. She grabbed her car keys, locking the door to her apartment and nervously pressing on the elevator button. Why was she nervous? She was in love with Jake. She saw a future with him, a future together. If tonight was going to be the start of forever, there was nothing to be afraid of. I wonder what Jake’s doing now, Shadi thought. Was he waiting for her on the couch? Trying to cook pasta, the only dinner he could reliably make without burning? Pacing back and forth in his room, turning over the ring box in his hand? The ring. What did it look like? Did he buy it new, or was it a family heirloom? Did he ask any of the guys on the team for tips, or did — Stop it, Shadi reminded herself. He doesn’t have to be proposing. We do nights in almost every week. Maybe he just wants to watch a movie. But in the back of her mind, as she pulled out of the parking garage, was the possibility that she was about to walk into one of the most important nights of her life. And it was, but not in the way she thought. Not in the way she wanted. 

Jake’s place was only ten minutes away from hers; before she even knew it, she was killing the engine and walking up the stairs to his door. She tapped her knuckles against the wood. It was barely ten seconds before Jake opened it up, smiling at her.  “Hey, thanks for coming over,” he said, leading her into the living room and pressing a kiss against her cheek, lingering a little longer than usual 

Shadi knew something was off even as they sat on the couch thirty minutes later, Star Wars playing on the screen in front of them. If she was being honest, she knew something was wrong from the moment she got there. Jake was acting stuff, not distant, but almost confused. LIke he had something on his mind that he couldn’t quite spit out. And it didn’t seem like a proposal. “Alright,” Shadi said, huffing and propping herself up on one arm to face Jake. “What’s up.”

To his credit, he didn’t mince words, didn’t play dumb. He knew better than to insult her intelligence like that, and she knew better than to believe him. “You noticed, huh?”

She rolled her eyes. “I love you for a lot of reasons, J, but you really do have a terrible poker face.”

Jake sighed, running a hand through his hair, leaving a piece hanging in front of his eye. “Alright,” he said, in that kind of I-know-what-I-need-to-say-but-I-don’t-want-to-say-it tone, the one that she wasn’t expecting. The one that never means good news. “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking on my life, our lives over the past thirteen months we’ve been together, and I’ve loved every minute of the time that we’ve spent together.” Okay, Shadi furrowed her brows, where’s he going with this? “I’ve also been doing a lot of thinking about my priorities in life, where they are right now and where I think they should be. And I’ve realized that,” he swallowed, “I’m at a place in my life where I need to be focusing on hockey.” Oh no. “And I don’t think I’m in a position where I can have a relationship and be as invested in my career as I need to be.” Oh God. 

Shadi sat up, stunned. “Are you...Are you breaking up with me?” 

Jake nodded his head jerkily. “And I want you to know that I don’t regret anything about our relationship. I don’t have anything bad to say about you, or the time we’ve spent together, or anything. I just don’t think I’m able to give you, or our relationship, the attention it deserves. You deserve someone who’s going to be able to dedicate a hundred percent to you, and as much as I wish I could, I don’t think I’m that person.”

“So, you’re saying I’m a distraction?” Shadi asked slowly, her eyes shiny with unshed tears. 

Jake ran a hand through his hair, tangling his fingers in his curls. “Fuck. No. That’s not it. I just don’t know if I’m in a place where I’m able to juggle two things that are so important, and that I want to dedicate this much time to.” 

She scoffed. “Are you really trying to pull the whole ‘it’s not you, it’s me’ line with me, DeBrusk?” That stung. She never called him by his last name, not even when they started dating. It was J, or babe, or even Jake if she was particularly annoyed, but never just DeBrusk. 

“Would it make you feel better if I was?” 

Shadi shook her head. “It’s worse. Don’t you know that it’s worse? Because then there’s not anything I feel like I could have done differently. Nothing I could have done to change your mind.” Her eyes drifted down to her right hand, where the gorgeous pearl ring Jake had gotten her for their anniversary just a month prior sat on her ring finger. “You said you were going to marry me one day,” Shadi said, sliding her fingertips down to the band and gently twisting it off. Her hand felt bare, even though it had only been there for a month. Jake’s breath caught in his throat. Never make a promise you can’t keep. 

Saying goodbye is death by a thousand cuts

God, sometimes Shadi just felt so fucking stupid. She almost felt naive, shortsighted from not listening to her friends in Boston, or people back home who warned her about Jake.“You know his reputation. You know how hockey players are” Shadi couldn’t count the number of times people had told her that, and the number of times she hadn’t listened. “He doesn’t stick with any one girl.” “I know you like him, but he’s only going to break your heart.” But the thing was, he hadn’t. Jake had made it clear, straight from the start of their relationship, that they were exclusive, and he backed it up. She wore his jersey to games, went as his date to all the Bruins fundraisers, and took the week off to come with him when he was selected for the All-Star Game. Jake knew his reputation better than anyone, and that’s why he was so committed to making sure she knew that he wasn’t the kind of guy everyone kept trying to peg him as. And Shadi had never felt so much pride then when she was able to turn around, prove them wrong, and say: “You see? He’s never done anything to hurt me, and he’s not about to start now.” 

But she couldn’t, not anymore. She couldn’t, because they all had been right and he had broken his promises and her heart and now she was crying in a bar with her best friend on a Friday night and had no clue how to get a grip of her feelings. She pounded back another beer, barely even stopping to swallow before ordering a fourth round. Or was it a fifth? She didn’t know, and at that point, she really didn’t care. 

I get drunk, but it's not enough/’Cause the morning comes and you're not my baby

Sometime past one but before her next door neighbor’s chihuahua always started barking at two, Shadi stumbled into her apartment. She unstrapped her heels and placed them haphazardly by the door as she walked down to the bathroom, reaching around the cupboard for her toothpaste. Teeth were brushed and flossed, and she had shed nearly all of her clothes by the time she reached her bed. She grabbed the nearest sweatshirt to pull over her body as makeshift pajamas, only half paying attention. Shadi was too tired to look too closely; if she had, she would have noticed that it was a Bruins hoodie, the very first one Jake had ever given to her, a month and a half into their relationship. 

It seemed like Shadi had barely drifted off to sleep when she was woken up by the sound of frantic knocks on her door. Her first thought was something was wrong with Clara, who lived down the hall, that she wasn’t feeling well or needed to be talked out of texting her ex-girlfriend. It had happened before. But then she realized that Clara would have called first. Then her thought was a fire somewhere, but she didn’t smell smoke and her alarm hadn’t gone off. The knocking persisted. “Okay, okay, I’m coming. You’re going to wake up the whole building,” Shadi grumbled, throwing back the covers and padding out to the living room, pants be damned. 

She tried to wipe the sleep out of her eyes, the harsh light of the hallway fluorescents the first thing she noticed as the door swung open. The second thing was the person standing in front of it. It was Jake. His hand was frozen in the air, like he was about to knock for a fourth time if she hadn’t answered. “What are you doing here?” she whispered, her voice small. She didn’t trust it to speak any louder. 

Jake’s breath hitched as he noticed what she was wearing. His sweatshirt. He stuffed his hand into his jeans pocket, pulling out her pearl ring. The same one she had taken off the day he left, the same one he had given her when his thoughts of the future were filled with big houses and weddings and kids’ birthday parties. He held it out to her. “I had to see you.”

[dirt-cup-draco]

Ardeth x Reader - Too Late For Us

Hi!! Could I kindly request an Ardeth Bay x Reader (Rick’s sister) where they had history but reader left with Rick and Evelyn to London after the first movie and bc of Alex they now meet again to defeat Imhotep and the Scorpion King, but Ardeth is engaged already to a woman from his tribe and reader is incredible jealous. Both reader and Ardeth still love each other though

When Evy and Rick had come to you, explaining that times were changing for the worst yet again, it went without saying that you would be helping them, right beside your brother and sister-in-law. What didn’t really sink in until you were in a plane, on your way to save the world from danger it couldn’t fathom, was that you would have to see Ardeth. Just as you felt responsibility to your sibling, he felt responsibility to keeping Imhotep buried once and for all. 

“What if he doesn’t want to see me?” Rick just rolled his eyes as you bit at your fingernails, a nervous habit you had thought you had left behind long ago. You also thought you had officially left your feelings behind but it didn’t seem like those had disappeared either. You weren’t ready to see Ardeth yet at the same time you could think of nothing else that would make you happier. The terror and excitement swirled in your stomach and you were left feeling sick. 

“I’m sure he’ll be very pleased to see you,” Evy comforted, hand warm on yours as she gave you a sympathetic look. 

You and Ardeth had grown very close the first time you had met, some invisible force drawing you together that not even the chaos around you could withhold. It had started with longing glances and slight touches, a hand on the small of your back as you tried to stay upright on the shifting sand, your knee bumping against his as you warmed yourselves in front of a fire that Rick had started as the sun set. 

One night everything had snapped into place, the tension growing until neither of you could handle it anymore. Jonathon was curled up in the sand, a bottle grasped in his hand. Evy was laying comfortably in a sleeping bag, Rick dozing peacefully near her. You found it sweet, your brother, whether he would have admitted it then or not, had found the woman for him. Alternatively, you and Ardeth were still awake, shoulder to shoulder and gazing at the stars. You thought that maybe you had found the man for you. 

The both of you had connected eyes at the same time, a sentence pausing in Ardeth’s throat as your closeness rattled him. “I-I was just going to say how beautiful the stars were tonight,” He confessed, looking surprisingly flustered. 

Without another word between the two of you, your lips had engaged in a dance that left your legs feeling weak. His hands were steady and his lips insistent as he pulled you closer, daring to nibble at your lip. You had been putty in his hands. You had both stumbled to a tent, too busy getting lost in the feel of his scruff against your neck and his hands kneading at your hips to think properly. Ardeth had left an impression on you that wasn’t fading, as well as several hickies if you remembered correctly but you hadn’t been complaining. 

After that, you both had little time to be near, let alone intimate. Time passed and when it was your time to leave, you had hesitated. Pulling Ardeth aside you had discussed a future that you could only dream of now, one where you sent letters frequently and stayed in touche, one where you visited and let the seeds of this whirlwind romance grow. 

But, just like in dreams, it was fleeting no matter how many times you tried to fall back asleep and continue the fantasy. 

You held to little bits and pieces, old letters he sent before he halted them completely without another word as well as the memories you shared. You hoped he was alright or that he hadn’t forgotten you at the very least. Did he think of you the way you thought of him? You were shaken from your thoughts as the plane landed, your heart in your head and your logical reasoning gone somewhere out the window. 

With the sun glaring down on you with unforgiving rays, you followed Rick and Evy as they chatted idly. You were too busy ogling the man that you had adored as he came into focus, hopping gracefully from his horse as he greeted your little traveling group with open arms a cheerful grin. “My friends,” His rich voice danced around in your head, turning your every thought to mush. 

Ardeth knew you would be arriving with your brother, it was a certainty. He however hadn’t thought he would feel his chest restrict at the sight of you, his heart aching uncomfortably. You looked like a deer caught in the headlights as you watched him and his stomach turned. Even now and he could see the adoration in your eyes, even if it was veiled by hurt. 

He had enjoyed your company, you had been hypnotizing and strong and Ardeth had been starved for touch, his body in tune with yours. However, when you left it only took him a month or so to realize that he didn’t care for you as you cared for him. Ardeth liked you but your connection had been purely physical, he missed your presence but only as a friend. It had been fun, passionate fun, but only that. He hadn’t had the guts to tell you he didn’t see you two going any further in any aspect besides friendship. 

The months had passed and then years. You were still a brilliant and beautiful woman, even a decade later but the spell you seemed to be under had worn off of him. “Come in,” He urged, his voice strained the slightest bit as he invited you all into his home that was just over the sand dune he had appeared from. “I have had refreshments prepared for you all,” 

“You mean I’ve prepared refreshments,” Came a teasing voice. It was soft and sweet, with a faux edge that made Ardeth’s heart burst with affection. However, you were feeling quite the opposite. It was as if a cold bucket of water had been tossed onto you when you had least been expecting it. A woman with a straight back and bright eyes sauntered into the humble living room you had all gather in, tucking herself into Ardeth’s side as if it was second nature.

You watched as he smiled, the warm expression dropping slightly as he caught your eye. He set his arm over her shoulder, pressing a kiss to her temple but he found he couldn’t look away from the betrayed look in your eyes. What would ease your pain? He wondered momentarily. Ardeth had tried to spare you by cutting off contact, letting you move on as he had, but it seemed he had only hurt you more. 

“Yes, I must give credit where credit is due, my love,” Ardeth cooed. 

Rick grinned, oblivious to the way your heart shattered. “You old dog! How did you manage to land such a knock out?” Rick was charming and she giggled at the compliment. Evy subtly elbowed Rick in the side, her other arm extending but in such a way that no one could see the show of support. You gripped her hand, willing her strength to be yours. It took everything in you to not cry. You had your own doubts, but a part of you had been hoping so badly that he had waited for you like you’d waited for him. 

“I ask myself that every day,” Ardeth answered Rick, eyes now glued lovingly to his lover’s face. “I have been blessed to have her by my side, these past five years have been a dream with her. I couldn’t ask for a better wife,” 

Ardeth emphasized the word. Wife. He has a fucking wife! You nearly whimpered. You had been starry eyed over him for years and here he was, happily married for nearly as long as you two had been separated. He knew you were processing the information, he could see it in the ways your eyes had gone dull, your expression exceptionally blank as you tried not to cry. 

You bit your lip in the hopes it would stop trembling. “How wonderful! Congratulations, friend.” You finally managed, words tasting bitter but sounding saccharine. Evy squeezed your hand as your shoulders shook imperceptibly, your entire body tensing to stop the physical reaction of your heartbreak. It was a cruel joke to bring you back to him only to shove the happiness he had found in your face. 

“Now how about those refreshments, huh?” You pressed, “I’m starving! Anyone else?” Your voice pitched without warning and the group was left looking at you in question before laughing softly. 

“A woman with an appetite, I like you,” Ardeth’s wife grinned, sending you a playful wink. Unbeknownst to her, you had been hoping to jump her husband’s bones not even two hours ago. You tried to smile back but it fell flat. 

“Y/N-” Evy whispered as the others began to filter in to the kitchen, the two of you diddling behind. 

“It’s fine,” You muttered. “It’s too late for us now, my fault I didn’t see that sooner,” Without another word uttered, you locked your heart away and calmed your expression. You were here to save the world, not let it crumble around you. Ardeth gave you an apologetic look and you nodded curtly. An understanding passed between you then. 

Whatever your history had been, it wasn’t to be repeated. 

[bellero]

I Want To Love

Request: request-  heya !! could you maybe write a sister Winchester fic where the reader is being like really irritable and emotional bc she’s struggling with her sexuality, and is like really upset bc she wants to be able to have a girlfriend without feeling afraid of what other people think? and she’s afraid to open up to Sam and Dean about it bc she thinks they won’t understand ? ahhh sorry if this doesn’t make sense 😅 I’ve never requested anything b4. (Also ur fics inspired me to get back into writing !❤️)

Characters: Dean Winchester x Sister!Reader, Sam Winchester x Sister!reader, reader x female!OC.

Warnings: homophobia, internalised homophobia, swearing, anxiety.

Author Note: I’m going to slowly work through my requests. It might take some time but please be patient<3.

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You were lying on your bed in the dusty motel room, your brothers were out interviewing a witness on for a case. You had read reports of a ghost that was harming residents of an old, abandoned house. You were scrolling through a tag you had found on twitter, it warmed and broke your heart simultaneously. You loved that these people were proud and comfortable with living life 100% authentically, but it also made you sad knowing you’d never be able to do that. It broke your heart knowing you’d never be able to publicly love a woman. It’s nothing to do with your family, god no, your brothers have never cared about that stuff. As long as you were happy, they were fine. However, you had always had this internalised shame for being gay. 

The door opened and your brothers walked in, “how’d it go?” you asked placing your now locked phone on the bedside table. Sam and Dean took off their jackets, Sam was sat at a small table with his laptop open and Dean was sat on the bed next to you “well, you were right. It’s definitely a ghost attacking these victims” Sam said, you did a small fist bump which caused them to smile at you, “luckily the person wasn’t cremated. Her remains are still in her grave, we’re gonna grab some food and head over” he explained further. You nodded your head and scooted to the edge of the bed “does this seem like a safe enough hunt for me to partake in?or...” you asked. Dean shot you a look,  

“kiddo, you know you have to rest up that ankle. I’m fine with you coming with us and helping out with the research but you gotta take care of yourself” you let out a groan and flopped onto your back, “fine” you grumbled. You had injured your ankle two weeks ago during a Wendigo hunt, it wasn’t broken, just badly sprained but that didn’t stop your brothers from overreacting. Dean stood up and hovered over you, “you hungry?” he asked, you nodded your head and sat up “you left me for three hours with no food in the motel room and no money. Of course I’m hungry, you idiot” you glared, he put the palm of his hand on your head and pushed you so you fell back onto the bed, you let out a laugh and kicked his leg, “can we go to that diner we drove past on the way here?” you asked, Dean nodded his head and turned to Sam who was typing away on his laptop, “Sammy, you coming?” he asked, Sam nodded his head and shut down his laptop. Your brothers left the motel room before you but quickly jumped when you pushed your way between them and ran towards the Impala, “I call shotgun!” you yelled at Sam whose eyes widened as he chased after you, Dean rolled his eyes but had a fond smile on his face as he watched the two of you fight over the front seat. Eventually Sam picked you up and moved you away causing you to flip him off.

-----------------

The car stopped outside of the diner, you jumped out and walked in-between your brothers. “I’ve never been this excited to eat in my entire life” you muttered under your breath. Dean swung an arm over your shoulders “we are so related” he said causing you to let out a snort of laughter.  

You stepped into the diner followed by your brothers you inhaled the smell of freshly baked food, Sam motioned to an empty booth near the back, you walked over, Dean slid in next to the window and you sat next to him, Sam sat opposite the both of you. You leant over Dean slightly and grabbed a menu, you opened it and began looking through your options.  

You heard footsteps skip over to where you were sat, “Hi, I’m Sophie and I’ll be serving you today, can I get you anything?” you looked up and felt your heart stop beating, your eyes widened slightly so you quickly adverted them back to the menu. You felt Dean elbow you in the side causing you to glare and hit him back “you having anything?” he asked, you nodded your head and glanced back at the waitress “yeah, I uh, could I have a bacon cheeseburger with fries and a water... please” you stuttered out with an awkward smile, you cleared your throat and handed her your menu, she took it out of your hands “awesome, be back soon!” She walked away, you followed subtly with your eyes, you quickly snapped out of it and shook your head. You look at your brothers who were smirking at you “what?” you asked somewhat defensively “you got a little flustered there, huh?” Dean asked, you narrowed your eyes at him and shook your head “no, I just think I’ve seen her somewhere before, that’s all” you swallowed nervously, luckily, they left it alone.

You were talking about the case when the waitress came back with your drinks, “I’ll bring your food out in a sec” she said with a smile, you let out a deep breath and took a sip of your water, you had said one sentence to this girl and you were already smitten and flustered, you put your water back on the table “how long do you think it’ll take to salt and burn the bones? I don’t really wanna be in that motel room on my own for hours. That place is creepy” you muttered at the end whilst taking another sip of water, “hopefully not too long, it’s a pretty cut and dry case” Sam explained, you nodded your head and let out a small yawn, “did you even sleep last night?” Dean asked, you shrugged your shoulders, your brothers knew that shrugging your shoulders was another way of you saying “no”.  

Sam sent you a look of disapproval, “you need to sleep, Y/n. We don’t want you getting hurt on a hunt because you become sleepy” you looked at him and rolled your eyes, you went to speak but was interrupted by the waitress coming back over with your food “here you go! One chicken salad, and two bacon cheeseburgers with fries” she handed Dean’s over and then yours, you furrowed your eyebrows in confusion when you felt a piece of paper on the bottom of the plate. When Sam and Dean weren’t looking you pulled out the paper,  

hey, I don’t usually do this but I was wondering if you wanted to go out sometime?  

Here’s my number, let me know!

-Sophie.

You sucked in a breath a smiled a little, you quickly tucked the piece of paper in your jacket pocket and grabbed the salt and tomato ketchup, “so what’s the plan of action?” you asked whilst sprinkling salt over your fries, Sam grabbed it out of your hand and frowned “stop using so much, it’s not good for you” you and Dean shared a look before shaking your heads, “and we’re gonna drop you off back at the motel and then drive over to the cemetery” you nodded your head and grinned, it gives you a perfect opportunity to meet with Sophie.

------------

Your brothers had just left to finish the hunt, you had been pacing the motel room for a solid ten minutes. You collapsed onto your bed with a sigh and unlocked your phone. The cemetery was about a half hour drive away, it’d take another half hour the dig up the grave, if not more and another half hour drive back. You had around an hour and a half, two hours at the most.  

You typed Sophie’s number into your phone and started typing out a text,  

Hey, it’s the girl from the diner. I’m free tonight if you wanted to hang out? My brothers are out for a few hours and I'm getting a bit bored. My name’s Y/n by the way!

You threw your phone down on the bed and let out a sigh, ‘the text sounded so stupid’ you thought, you walked over to the sink and went to turn on the tap to get some water when you phone binged, you ran and dived on the bed. You opened the message and grinned.

Hey! I didn’t actually think you’d text, but I’d love to hang out. I’ve got about an hour left on my shift here if you’d like to keep me company, it’s been a real quiet night. Also, I like your name, it’s cute x

You let out a small laugh and buried your face in the blanket. You’d never been this flustered over a girl before. Granted this was the first time you’d actually tried to flirt with a girl. You shot her a text back.

I’d love that. The place we’re staying at is 10 mins away. I’ll see you soon? X

You clicked send and went to put your phone down before you quickly typed out another one.

Also, your name is cute too x

You let out a smile and grabbed your jacket, you wrote out a quick note and placed it on the table,

Got a bit hungry so I’ve headed back to the diner. Call when you’re back – Y/n x

You slipped your jacket on, pocketed your phone and some of the money Sam had left for you and walked out of the door.

---------

You were slightly freezing when you entered the diner, it was a cold night and you were fairly certain your hands had turned blue. You cupped your hands over your mouth and breathed hot air into them. You looked around and spotted an empty booth near the back tucked away in the corner, you walked over and sat down. You shrugged your jacket off your shoulders and rested your arms on the table. Letting out a sigh you pulled out your phone and checked the time, you had maybe an hour and a half before your brothers came back, you were snapped out of your thoughts when somebody placed a cup of hot chocolate in front of you.  

You looked up and smiled, you tucked your phone away and grabbed the hot chocolate. ”Hey” you breathed, she sat down across from you with a small smile on her face, she had deep dimples on both sides of her mouth, her emerald green hair was pulled up in a tight ponytail and the apron she was wearing had coffee stains over it. “Hi” she giggled, “how’re you?” she asked, you nodded your head “I’m good, thanks for the hot chocolate. It’s freezing out” she nodded and smiled “it’s fine, your lips were practically blue. I didn’t want you to stay freezing” she looked down for a quick second and looked back up at you “so, I’m guessing you aren’t from around here?” she asked, you let out a small laugh and shook your head. You took a quick sip of hot chocolate, “no, me and my brothers are from Lebanon. We travel a lot though for... work” you furrowed a brow whilst you tried to explain the complexity of your situation, “hunters, right?” she asked.  

Your eyes widened which made her laugh, “I mean c’mon. You guys roll into town days after a mysterious murder? Plus this a small town, one of our regulars came in and told me about how some guy knocked on his door claiming to be FBI but then started asking him about cold spots and flashing lights” you let out a small breath and started laughing. You looked up at her and tilted your head “how did you find out about the things that go bump in the night?” you asked, she sighed “my dad use to hunt a lot. One night he went out to hunt a vamp nest but he didn’t come back... we don’t know if they turned him or killed him” her voice was quiet and her eyes were downcast, you reached over and grabbed her hand “I’m sorry that happened to you, I know what it’s like to loose somebody you care about... it’s not great” you sympathised, she slowly laced your fingers together and smiled softly “yeah, I guess it helps talking about it... my mom acts like it didn’t happen, she’s in denial about the whole thing so talking to her is pretty useless” she explained, you gave her hand a gentle squeeze which caused her to look up at you “you can talk to me” you offered, she smiled and nodded her head.  

It had been about half an hour since you arrived, you had talked a lot about hunting, she had asked you about what it was like living with your brothers, you asked her about school. She was a little jealous about the fact that you didn’t have to go.

“I swear Sam is so overbearing with school stuff. The second we found the bunker he started researching schools in the area” you laughed whilst eating a fry, “we came to a compromise that he would just home school me instead, I thought it’d be awful but it isn’t too bad” she let out a laugh, “what did Dean think about it all?” Sophie asked with a fond grin on her face, you shrugged your shoulders “he didn’t really care... I mean don’t get me wrong, he did try to talk me into going to school a couple times but when he realised I wasn’t budging he gave up, left it all to Sam” you smiled, it’s rare you get to recounter the good memories you shared with your older siblings, it was nice being able to talk about them this way.

Sophie looked at you for a few seconds and you stared back, “are you out yet?” she asked, you froze slightly but managed to shake your head, “I’ve been debating it... I know they wouldn’t care, they’d be happy for me either way but I’m still just so scared, y’know? I mean, even I’m still battling with myself about the whole thing... I just don’t think I’m quite ready, I’m almost there. It’s just going to take a little more time, I think...” you trailed off, it was her turn to grab your hand this time, “whatever you decide to do, I’m here for you. You don’t have to rush this, take your time” she said rubbing her thumb across the skin of your hand. You smiled softly and clasped her hand in yours, “thank you, it means a lot” she smiled and brought your hand up to her mouth and gently placed a kiss on your knuckles, “anytime”.

Your little moment was interrupted by your phone ringing, you sighed and answered it,

“Hey, Dean.... I’m at the diner, got a bit hungry but I left a note...” you rolled your eyes, “I didn’t call or text because I didn’t want disrupt you guys” Sophie stifled a laugh, you grinned at her “nah it’s fine, I’ll walk back, kay see ya!” you hung up the phone and huffed out a breath which causes Sophie to let out a laugh “never have older brothers, they suck” you rolled your eyes, she smiled and nodded “duly noted” she checked the time whilst you looked around the empty diner “wanna help me close up?” you nodded your head and stood up, you helped her collect the dishes and clean them, it was quiet but it wasn’t awkward. It was comfortable. It felt right.

You were drying and putting the dishes away whilst she cleaned them, “hey, Y/n” you turned and was met with soap suds to the face, your lips quirked at the sound of her giggling, “I’m glad you found that funny” you said whilst wiping them off your face, you grabbed a handful and covered her head with it, you were both laughing, you handed her the towel as she dried off her head whilst you wiped your face with the other one, you placed your towel on the counter and looked at her “you uh.. You missed a bit” you said pointing, she tilted her head to the side, “let me just-” you gently took the towel out of her hand and patted the part of her head that was still damp with soap suds, you cleared your throat as you put the towel back down, you turned your back and finished drying the rest of the dishes, you grabbed for a cup when you felt her grab your hand, you looked at her to find her already staring at you. You smiled softly, “hey” you whispered, she laughed “hey” she stepped closer and you could feel your heart jump into your throat.  

You looked down as she intertwined her fingers with yours, you smiled softly and gave her hand a small squeeze. With a slow exhale you looked up to find that she was pretty much toe to toe with you. She reached up and tucked a stray piece of hair behind your ear, she went to speak when a knock on the diner door sounded, you stepped away and looked over to the door, you had let out a groan of annoyance when you saw your oldest brother stood there, Sophie shot you and amused grin when she walked over and unlocked it allowing him to enter.  

You stepped out of the kitchen, “Dean, I told you I was going to walk back” you said, he shrugged his shoulders, “it was getting late, plus I don’t think you’d wanna walk back in that” he gestured outside, you pulled a face at the sight of the pouring rain.  

Dean turned to Sophie, “you need a ride home?” he asked, she shook her head but grinned over at you “nah, I'm good. I’ve got a car” she pointed towards the red Jaguar. Dean nodded in approval “is that the 1994 XJS model?” he asked, his interest suddenly peaked, Sophie nodded her head. You looked at Dean, “so, are we heading back or?” you asked, he snapped out of whatever trance he was in “sure, grab your stuff, I’ll go wait in the car” he walked out and jogged towards the impala.  

You turned back to Sophie, “I’m sorry for him. He sees a nice car and turns... weird...” you trailed off as you slipped your jacket on, she shook her head “it’s fine... so this is goodbye, huh?” she said, your turned towards her with a small frown on your face and shook your head “no, absolutely not. I’d love to see you again... I’m about an hour out, so it’s not too far” you shrugged, she smiled and nodded “I’d love to see you again too... we’ll have to plan something” you nodded, it was silent for a while “what were you going to say? Before Dean interrupted...” you asked, she stepped forward “I was just wondering if I could kiss you...” she trailed off looking down at the floor, you smiled softly and stepped closer to her, you were eventually toe to toe again, she looked up at you “okay” you spoke softly.  

--------

You ran towards the Impala, the rain was coming down a lot heavier. You opened the passenger door and sat down, you closed the door and turned your hands towards the heaters “I hate the rain” you grumbled. Dean chucked and slowly drove out of the parking lot.  

It was silent for the majority of the car ride, that was until Dean spoke up. “I uh... I wasn’t interrupting anything back there, was I?” he asked, you froze and turned to him. You quickly shook your head, “no, I was helping her clean up and got soap on my face, there was still some in my hair so she was getting rid of it” you spoke, you hated lying to your brother but it was easier than the truth, “you sure?” he asked, you nodded your head, “okay” he spoke.

You jumped out of the impala and into the apartment, throwing your jacket and phone onto the bed, “hey, Sammy. Gotta pee” he laughed when you raced past him into the bathroom, Dean walked in after you and shook his head, “dude, what took so long?” Sam asked, Dean shrugged off his jacket and sat on the bed “I was waiting for Y/n, she made friends with that waitress from earlier” Dean explained, Sam furrowed his brows at his brother, a sign he knew there was more. Dean let out a sigh “I think I may have interrupted something... I don’t know, when I asked her about it, she lied. Do you think she’s hiding something?” Dean asked, Sam pondered for a moment “possibly, but we shouldn’t grill her about it. She'll tell us eventually” Sam said, hoping his idiot of an older brother would listen.

Dean sighed, he was about to talk when your phone interrupted him, you had a text. Dean looked down at your phone and then over to Sam whose head was wrapped up in research. He subtly grabbed your phone and flipped it over so that the screen was facing him.

Hey, I had a lot of fun tonight. It was great meeting you... I guess we could count this as our first official date? I hope we can see each other again... soon...  

-Sophie x

Dean’s eyes widened, “I knew it” he muttered causing Sam to look up from his computer in confusion, “I knew I was interrupting something, read this” he said standing up, he passed the phone over to Sam who read the text out loud, Sam raised his eyebrows.  

You opened the door, “what’re you looked at?” you asked, your eyebrows furrowed when Sam hid whatever was in his hand by his leg, “what’s that?” you asked. Your two brothers looked at each other, silently communicating, “no... no you are not doing this weird telepathy thing. What is it, what’re you hiding? We said no more secrets, remember?” you explained getting frustrated. The boys looked at each other, Sam let out a sigh and held out your phone.  

You furrowed your eyebrows and snatched it away from him, “why were you looking at my phone?” you asked defensively, you saw that you’d had a text from Sophie, you read it and froze. You felt tears rush to your eyes and you started shaking, “you read my text?” you asked not looking at either of them.  

The silence was deafening, “why the hell would you do that? Haven’t you ever heard of privacy? God, I can’t believe you did this!” you yelled, you walked towards the door but was stopped in your tracks by Dean grabbing your arm. You yanked it out of his grip and glared at him, “what?” you spat causing his gaze to harden, “hey, you don’t get to run out. We need to talk about this” you rolled your eyes, “talk about what? You already know what it is, you invaded my privacy!” tears filled your eyes, “you had no right to do that. You had no right to look through my phone, either of you!” you walked over to the bed and sat down, “I wasn’t even ready to tell you guys... Every time I’ve thought about telling you I’d just choke up. It was like the words were in my mouth, but I just couldn’t say them” you explained with tears rolling down your face, “I mean, I’ve felt so isolated and alone because I couldn’t talk to anybody about it, it feels like a weight on your shoulders and it’s so exhausting, carrying it is so exhausting” you whimpered, you didn’t notice that your brothers were now sat on either side of you with tears in their eyes, “hiding this, it’s been so difficult... there’s always been a part of me that hates the fact that I like girls. It absolutely despises it. Which sucks because I can’t change who I am and I don’t want to change who I am... I don’t know what to do” you finished, quiet whimpers leaving your mouth.

Dean grabbed your hand, “I’m proud of you... I can’t begin to imagine how you’re feeling... I’m sorry I invaded your privacy” he paused and looked at Sam, “we both are, but you don’t have to go through this on your own. We’ve got your back, kiddo” he said whilst brushing away your tears with his thumb, “Dean’s right, Y/n. Sure we don’t know how this feels but we can try our best to understand” he knelt down in front of you, “but you’ve gotta talk to us. We can’t help if you keep things bottled up.” he picked up your phone and held it out in front of you, “I think the best place to start would be to text that girl... she clearly cares about you. You can’t be scared forever, sweetheart” you took the phone out of Sam’s hand and sighed, you placed it beside you.  

You rested your head on Dean’s shoulder and grabbed Sam’s hands in yours, “I love you both, so much” you whispered, “love you too” “love you too, kiddo” they replied back.

----------------------------------

Forever Tags-

@winchesters-favorite-girl @girl-with-a-fandom-fettish @keira-willow  @max-peralta @assbutt-still-in-hell @internationalmusicteacher @rosie-winchester  @hero-ically  @waywardnewcomer @hi-my-name-is-riley  @rosegoldquintis   @wegoddessofhell @saturn-aka-six @paintballkid711 @wecantgiggleitsafandom @daughters-and-winsisters @anxiouslymalicious 

[inutargaryen]

Until We Meet Again

Rating: T+

Ship: InuKag

Summary: Based on this piece. Some souls are meant to meet for the rest of eternity.

He wasn’t sure when the spontaneity in his life had been replaced for routine, but he knew it happened more frequently. At 8 am he woke up for physical therapy, at 12 lunch, 2 pm bingo, and so on. Woven in between were the various pills administered to him by an aide not much older than his daughter.

His physical therapist complimented him frequently. While his body might belong to an aging man, his spirit surely did not. It pained the young girl to see him struggle to stand after a session, but, when she would reach her hand out for assistance he would shoot daggers with eyes. His sharp tongue had grown quieter with age, however, his stubbornness would persist until death.

In his youth, he was a man of determination. He arrived in the States post-war with a dollar and a dream. What he found was prejudice. Not even that could deter him. He solved disagreements in back alleys, fixed cars, cleaned dishes, delivered takeout. He once chased a car down on his bike for cutting him off, or that was his favorite version of the story to tell his kids at least.

He no longer created adventurous stories. He sat in his room and watched American television, he longed for home, his wife, his kids.

None of the kids could handle the responsibility of eldercare on their own. Ai had recently been diagnosed with breast cancer, Eiji had his second divorce, and Nobu had eight children. It was evident he couldn’t live alone anymore. He burnt part of his apartment down from falling asleep with the stove on. Then he forgot to take his medicine and ended up in the hospital for three weeks.

So is the woe of aging. 

The nurses left warning signs outside his door.

“ Mr. Taisho is NOT happy today.” In smaller letters there lay special instructions depending on how he reacted, no jello cups please, or his personal favorite, no stupid questions.

What he hated most about the assisted living facility was that is smelled like death. Every room with a soul that had gone off to its next adventure. Or those that were still alive smelt like they were already dead. It was not just depressing, it was downright disgusting.

To increase morale they hosted a party every Friday to encourage the residents to meet. Mr. Taisho suspected that they just wanted them to live longer so they could rip every last dime from their retirement funds. His aide had taken a liking to him, suggested he attend, he always refused.

This Friday was different from any other.

He hadn’t really cared all that much for women anymore, nothing south of his belly button functioned too well and he had three knee surgeries. Even if it weren’t for that, his wife had died long ago and so did his desire.

Then he saw her.

She arrived on a Wednesday. He knew this because she was getting a walkthrough of facility as he headed sat outside the physical therapy room. She did not dress like she was preparing for a funeral, but instead, still carried herself as he imagined she did in her youth. Her dress was far shorter than he had ever seen in the facility, but still modest, he could see her bony knee sticking out. As she passed him she smelt of honey and lavender. Her voice was pleasant, soft and raspy, as if she had only ever smoked a few cigarettes in her lifetime. More importantly, she was the only other Japanese person in the facility.

X

His aide was surprised to see him dressed when she knocked on the door. He had been here for exactly two years and had not went to any event where he couldn’t illegally gamble.

His aide doted on him. She smoothed out the wrinkles from his shirt like a mother would a child. From her lips fell words like groovy and other slang from this decade he didn’t quite understand. She extended her arm out to him for balance.

He let out something between a scoff and sigh, waving off her arm. He could use the help walking but he wouldn’t see the mystery woman with any signs of weakness.

They walked down the hall together. Close enough in proximity for her to catch him if he fell, but enough to give him his independence. When they reached the door he stopped for a second, staring as if a portal to another world might exist on the other end.

“ Are you scared, Mr. Taisho?” She asked playfully.

“Keh!”

He analyzed all parts of the room, his eyes searching for her everywhere. Something close to a frown tugged on his lips as he failed to identify her.

“ Come on now!” The aide pleaded with

“ I’m going back to my ro-“ he finished as soon as he began. As he turned to look behind him and there she was the definition of beauty. Her hair gathered together in a bun that revealed her delicate neck. He had only glanced at her outfit for a second before returning to her face and then her scent. That scent intoxicated him to the point he was without words.

What he didn’t realize is that everyone else could notice him staring at her. Mr. Taisho did not have countenance that coincided with flattery. He looked like the nurses had referred to him in secret, a mean old man.

“Hasn’t anyone taught you not to stare? “

Her voice awakened something deep in his soul. He could feel something pulsing deep inside of him.

He blinked a few times while he pondered a sarcastic comeback. He watched as she continue walking with an airy step.

“ I ain’t looking at you.”

His aide shook her head placing both hands on his back to softly nudge him inside. He gave in reluctantly, now, sulking very close to the entrance so he could escape at any moment.

X

He watched her subtly as she moved around the room. People were drawn to her like bugs to honey, her pool of warmth and sweetness was worthy a terrain to die in. Her smile radiated, called to him, but he tried his best to ignore it. When her eyes darted to meet his he looked away, pretending to be interested in the tray of jello.

He imagined how he would have approached her in his youth. Not likely that it would go much differently. He exuded confidence in everything, that is, except for love. Perhaps she would have approached him then. Her with rosy youthful cheeks and him with an icy glare waiting to be thawed by her glance.

Mr. Taisho was handsome in his youth in a way that only clean-cut women searching for a wild escape were drawn to. He looked as if his life had been unkind to him. But there was a certain charm in a face that looked like it had actually lived. Skin that had been burned by the sun too many times. His black tresses drawn in a ponytail that collected down to his back. Proof that he had not cared for societal norms. His hazel eyes that mimicked the yellow of the sun in the light.

Now, his eyes were replaced with a gray film from the cataracts. His long hair had been chopped long ago, the maintenance far too much for his aging body. The color of snow that was a clue to everyone that he had few years to claim his life on this earth.

He was pulled out of subconscious thought by her smooth voice. She talked about many things at once. He pretended to ignore her as she spoke about music, about her time as a dancer, about her children. He lifted his head up as he was met by silence.

“ I was listening. “

Then she quizzed him on all that she said. A hand on her hip as if she was to scold him. Something that resembled a smile crept on his face as he repeated her conversation verbatim. New York City Ballerina, taught at Julliard, kids too busy so they shoved her in here.

She looked pleased and extended her hand out to him, propositioning him. At first he refused scowled at her. Looked at his feet as if they have been put on wrong. But she insisted, her hand pulling on to his with force. There he was, trapped in her pool of honey as she moved him to the dance floor.

♪ Haven't felt like this, my dear. Since I can't remember when. It's been a long, long time. ♪

They twirled in silence to the ballad. The older woman rested her cheek on his chest as they moved together in unison.

♪ You'll never know how many dreams I've dreamed about you. Or just how empty they all seemed without you. ♪

His soul awakened to her tender touch. Unbeknownst to him, it had awakened hers as well.

what took you so long?

you weren’t easy to find this time.

i thought you’d never come.

i always do, don’t i?

i thought our story had ended.

that will never happen, kagome.

how much time do we have left?

not much, not much.

inuyasha, you feel warmer.

you are mine.

has this lifetime been kind?

doesn’t matter.

the songs almost over.

you smell like heaven.

will you find me next time?

always, always.

X

His aide peaked at them throughout the night with caution. Not for them, but for the fear of Mr. Taisho catching her staring. Her eyes darted with playful happiness as he watched him gather jello cups for them, as he listened to her talk, as what might have been a smile broke slowly on his face. She had become so entranced by his softness that she had forgotten that he could see her.

“ What are ya’ looking at! “ He gaped at her angrily. The woman beside him tapped his shoulder lightly, before smiling in the direction of the aide.

The aide pretended to be scared to appease Mr. Taisho. Softly she smiled to herself, her hands collected over her chest where she felt the familiar pulse.

Her soul spoke out to no one in particular.

one hundred lifetimes, reborn the same.

X

AN:

The aide is sango bc she will spend her lifetime as Inuyasha’s BROTP. All italics/ no capitalization are convos of the soul. The current body/ mind has no idea.This is a small part of a larger piece that expands on the piece that’s linked!

[cptn-stvngrntrgrs]

Prompt! Natasha meets Steve's mother, Sarah, in a vision after a mission bc she got injured or smth. "Watching you and my son from up here has got to be the most frustrating thing to watch. Both of you are stubborn and dont realize what you have right now could be something more."

holy shit anon. this is a couple months too late, i’m so sorry!!! thank you for this prompt though - i truly had fun with it!!! here you go~~!!!

Title: I Had A Dream; Your Mother Knows

Relationship: Steve Rogers/Natasha Romanoff

Natasha needed a nudge and who else better give it to her than Sarah Rogers herself?

set sometime after CACW and before Infinity War.

Okay, I know the title are two ABBA songs but there’s nothing else related to ABBA in this fic; I just happened to be listening to the Mamma Mia soundtrack while thinking of a title lol

There are bad missions and there’s bad missions.

This one happens to fall into the latter category, Natasha noticed, a little bit too late. They were tracking down a major supplier of illegal Chitauri weapons deep in the rural countryside. Sam was in charge of flying their jet while Steve and Wanda took down the dealers as a distraction so Natasha can come into their main office and gather the intel.

She plugged in the flash drive and began coding the files from the computer into it, typing furiously. She heard a lock click and in a split second, she has her gun drawn and twirled around to face one of the dealers, holding a gun in front of him. She was a fraction of a second too late as he already fired at her twice, two bullets hitting her chest and stomach. Shit, she cursed through gritted teeth and managed to fire at the guy just before she started to stammer down, gripping onto the desk behind her. The shot hit his waist and he stumbled backwards.

Natasha fired another round at him but her aim was shaky as she tries to keep standing up. She heard the door burst open and collapsed to the floor at the sight of Steve. He looked at her then at the man, who was getting ready to fire at Steve, but he beat him to it and emptied his gun at him to make sure he’s gone, before running to Natasha’s side.

She remembered seeing Steve hold onto her and him screaming into his earpiece for Sam to get them. And she could faintly hear Steve crying out her name, sounding very desperate. Natasha wants to wake up and remind him to let go of her and get the flash drive instead, what is he doing!!! This mission would be pointless if they don’t get that intel. She tried but she couldn’t. She felt something consuming her and she let it, letting the pain go.

–

Natasha woke up, her head feeling light and vision hazy. She was lying down in bed, but the ceiling was unfamiliar for her. Slowly, she turned her head around and saw a woman watching her. Natasha squinted her eyes at the figure but she couldn’t make out her face. Feeling weak, she took her time to sit up and examine her surroundings. She was at a small apartment, and although it was a place she’s never been to before, it feels… familiar.

“I’m glad you’re awake,” the woman’s voice broke the silence. Natasha was still looking around her and let her eyes fall on the woman in front of her once again.

“Who are you? Where am I?” Natasha’s voice came out as raspy and she coughed to clear her throat but soon flinched from the pain she suddenly felt on her stomach. She placed a hand down to put a little bit of pressure on it, hoping to ease the pain.

“Are you hurt?” the woman replied, a frown gracing her beautiful features. Natasha narrowed her eyes. She looks so familiar. And that frown… she’s seen that frown somewhere, she just couldn’t remember. When Natasha didn’t answer, the woman let out a bit of a chuckle. “Oh dear, I’m sorry. You must be confused. I’m Sarah. Sarah Rogers.”

Natasha blinked. Sarah…? Like Steve’s mother, Sarah? Well that does explain the familiar features. And the apartment. She’s seen photos of it from Steve’s old files from before the war. Steve talked about how beautiful his mother was but seeing her personally, she’s gorgeous. Steve definitely got his striking blue eyes from his mother.

Sarah smiled at her, noticing the look of recognition on Natasha’s face. “I take it that you know me from Steve?” Natasha nodded, still trying to take in what’s really happening. “Good. I’m glad that he still talks about me, that silly punk.”

Natasha felt her lips twitch at that. She remembered Steve telling her that his mother and Bucky would call him ‘punk’ due to his reckless nature. “Um, Ms. Rogers, why am I seeing you? Am I… dead?” the possibility of her being dead hasn’t really hit Natasha yet but that’s the only reason that she could think of that would make her see Sarah. She felt a pang of sadness… and regret.

Sarah laughed - it was a beautiful sound - and waved a hand, shaking her head. “Don’t worry, dear, you’re not dead. Almost, though. You were hit, badly, and poor Steve’s shaken,” she explained. Natasha frowned, she remembered getting shot but she didn’t think it was that bad.

“Oh… Um, but how am I with you?” she asked once again.

“Yes, about that. Well this is just me visiting you in a dream. But you’ll be fine, honey, don’t worry,” Sarah reassured, noticing the look of concern on Natasha’s face.

“Huh. I’ve been getting interesting dreams lately,” Natasha mumbled. She thought about the dream she had the other day - a vision of a family, her family. With Steve. Complete with a big house and a white picket fence. She shook her head because no, that’s not possible.

Sarah was watching her intently. “Natasha, I’m here because I want to talk to you. I’ve been watching you and my son from up here,” she paused, taking a deep breath, releasing it with an exasperated puff. “And I got to say, that is most frustrating thing I’ve ever had to watch. Both of you are stubborn and don’t realize what you have right now could be something more.”

Natasha was speechless. Something more? With Steve? She just stared at Sarah, not knowing what to say.

Sarah sighed at the sight of Natasha looking clueless. “Natasha, do you really not see it? Or are you just refusing to acknowledge it?” Sarah asked her, although Natasha knew it was more of a rhetorical question.

The thing is, she does see it. The frequent glances, the banter, and even the way he just seems happier when she’s around. Besides, subtly isn’t exactly Steve’s strongest point. The guy wears his heart on his sleeve for everyone with eyes to see. And anyone who spends at least 5 minutes around the two of them would be able to tell that Steve practically looks at Natasha with heart eyes.

But Sarah is right. Natasha is refusing to acknowledge it. She’s scared, okay? She’s used to every good thing in her life being taken away from her. And Steve? Steve’s the best thing that’s happened to her (well, and Clint too).

She can’t manage to lose him - doesn’t want to lose him. She really tried not to, but she’s starting to depend on him, on his presence. Like how his constant soothing words everytime she found herself to be in a bad place - nightmares, flashbacks - would be enough to bring her back to reality, to herself. The way he just seems to make her forget her past, the red in her ledger.

“Natasha?” Sarah called out. Natasha’s eyes snapped back to meet hers and she looks a little concerned. “Don’t overthink it. You care about him, and he cares about you. A lot. Now, just listen to what your heart wants, I think it’ll help lead you two in the right direction.” She smiled softly and reached out to grasp Natasha’s hand. “Now, go back there and you’ll figure it out. Thank you for being there for my son.”

Then darkness overtook her.

Natasha awoke with a start. She tried to take a deep breath, but was met with pain instead. She has a pair of breathing support tubes in her nose that is probably breathing for her. Frowning, she tried to look around - as best as she could, anyway, she felt so sore - and found a mop of blonde hair on her right side. She can immediately tell that it’s Steve, and he looks fast asleep, bent at a weird angle from the chair he was sitting in. His head was resting on top of his crossed arms, with one of his hands clutching Natasha’s.

Based on the ceiling and lights around her, she’s in a room that’s not quite an actual hospital room, but is set to look like one; with machines plugged in around her and it looks familiar. Pausing to think for a moment, she realized this must be one of SHIELD’s clandestine facilities, which she’s been to in some other regions in the country, like the underground one Fury recovered in. They probably couldn’t risk taking her to an actual hospital in case they get caught.

Steve stirred a couple of seconds later, most likely sensing she was awake based on her moving her head. Well, she and Steve has always been attuned to each other, so it wouldn’t surprise her if he felt that she was awake through no other means but his gut.

He looked startled for a moment, eyes still unfocused as they met Natasha’s, who already has a smile playing on her lips. “Hi soldier,” she croaked out. It was meant to be teasing but it turns out she barely has a voice. Which reminds her, she needs water. Her throat felt like cardboard.

Steve looked stunned. He remained silent for a couple of more seconds until breathing out a long sigh. “Oh thank god,” she heard him mutter before he ducked his head down and she felt him kiss her hand. When he looked up at her again, his eyes were shining with unshed tears. “I’m so happy you’re awake, Nat. We were so worried…” he trailed off, looking at her intently, like she was the only thing in the world that mattered. In any other circumstances, Natasha would’ve teased him about this, but right now, she can only widen her smile and feel her cheeks heat up a bit.

“What happened?” she asked, her voice still low. Steve raised his eyebrow at the way she sounded, and seemed to get the clue that she needed water. He held up a hand and reached down, taking a bottle of water and straw from what she guessed was his bag under the bed. He let her hand go as he uncapped it, put the straw in, and held it up in front of her to drink. Natasha sipped from the straw as quickly as she could, and in just a few seconds, she finished the bottle. Steve let out a small chuckle and put it away, sitting back down, and grasping her hand in his again.

“Hm, where do I even start? It has been a tough week, Nat.” he said lightly, but there was a heaviness in his voice - something like resignation, weariness, and relief all at once.

“Wait, a week?” Natasha interjected. “I was out for a week?” Steve only nodded and Natasha gaped at him. No wonder he looked like a mess. And she feels like a mess.

“Yeah. We nearly,” she heard his voice waver, but he continued, “lost you. A couple of times too,” Steve cleared his throat, blinking quickly. “If you were leaning a little bit more to your right…” Steve trailed off, shaking his head. Natasha knew what he meant, based on the tubes on her nose and chest. “Fury had you transported here, ASAP. He sent Sam the coordinates as soon as he mentioned you were shot. Badly.” Steve sighed.

“But did you get the intel?” Natasha asked after Steve paused. As soon as she asked that, though, she knew it was the wrong question.

Steve stared at her and frowned. Natasha had to stop herself from grinning. He looked so much like Sarah had been in her vision, but she didn’t want to tell him that right now. “Nat. Did you not hear what I just said? You almost died, I couldn’t care less about some damn intel,” he scowled.

“I’m sorry…” Natasha muttered, feeling guilty. Sarah’s words echoed in her mind. He cares about you. A lot. “I’m just worried that-”

“- We wouldn’t get the intel we need, yes, I know that,” Steve cut her off and finished her train of thought. Natasha stayed quiet. “But Nat, you have to understand, you mean so much more to us, to me,” he emphasized, and Natasha’s eyes widened fractionally, “than some piece of information,” his grip on her hand was getting tighter with each word.

Natasha didn’t say anything and just looked at him, her eyes searching his. “Come here,” she motioned for him to come closer to her. Throwing her a puzzled look, Steve stood up to move his seat closer and leaned over her. Natasha used her free hand to pull him down by tugging his shirt, and clashed their lips together.

It seemed like it took Steve a few moments to realize what was happening since he just froze and Natasha moved her hand from his shirt to the back of his head, pressing him down harder. He finally came to his senses at this, and started to kiss her back, closing his eyes. Knowing that Natasha probably doesn’t have the strength, he adjusted himself so she doesn’t have to pull him down, and put his arm on the bed to brace himself over her.

The kiss, which started out innocent and slow, became more heated as months of pent up desire overcame them. Steve poured out all his worry and concern and relief into it, relishing into the fact that she’s here and she’s alive. Natasha was taking it all, gripping into his shirt and resisting the urge to pull him closer. There are still tubes connecting her to machines and she wouldn’t want him to pull on those.

“So are you ever going to tell us she woke up or are you going to wait until after your honeymoon before doing so?” A teasing voice made Steve suddenly jump up and pull away from Natasha. Sam was leaning by the already-opened door frame, a smirk plastered on his face. Wanda was right behind him, face split into a huge grin.

Steve was at a loss for words and can feel that his face is probably matching the red of his uniform. “I- uh,” he looked at Natasha for help, but she just had a smug look on, looking back at Sam and Wanda. “Um, why didn’t you knock?” Steve finally managed to let out.

“We did,” Wanda answered, moving in front of Sam and into the room. “But no one answered. We thought you two were both still sleeping so we let ourselves in,” she explained.

“But turns out, it was a different kind of sleeping,” Sam said with a wink. “You were supposed to call a doctor when she woke up!” he reminded Steve.

“Oh. Um, doctor, yes,” Steve repeated, blinking, looked at the headboard above Natasha and pressed a button.

“However, I am glad you two finally figured it out,” Wanda mentioned, sitting at the chair on Natasha’s other side.

“Figured it out?” Steve asked, tilting his head at her.

“Oh, we had helped,” Natasha answered, reaching for Steve’s hand and locking her fingers with his. He looked down at her, still looking confused, but she just smiled broadly at him. She knows their relationship is about to become something more.

[swearronchanel]

the durrells finale

Reporting live (not really) and simultaneously crying from Disneyland Paris!!

I’m literally not Fucking ready to say goodbye to this show! My heart hurts

but here goes nothing right

Louisa gracefully opening the window

MY SON LARRY IS BACK!!

Louisa’s sunglasses yes queen 😍

The family is all back together MY HEART IS MELTING

“No you’re too white” me @ the American government

“I did bring you all on an epic Greek journey, which we are still on” YEA BUT NOT FOR LONG 😭

Larry causally brining uP the war

“We’re not going anywhere” GOD ya really just want to be ironic and hurt me

fuck them nazis

HOW IS THIS THE END UGHH I CANT TAKE IT (meanwhile it’s only the credits)

SPOON MAKING LMAO louisa really needs to hook up with spiros she’s losing it

FETUS PIC OF THEO AND GERRY IM CRYIN ALREADY

stop the years pls!!

Aw Galini is back too

Margo has an announcement

“I’m less stupid than I thought I was” LMAO ME AFTER DOING A SEMESTER ABROAD

LOUISA CRINGING AT MARGO LMAOO

“I DONT REALLY REMEMBER” LMAOO LOUISA SKKSKSKS I FELT

Les showing up with the bottle of wine

HE’s living out of his car STOP

LOUISA COME RESCUE HIM PLS😭

“You’ve loved my mother ever since you met her” FUCK YEA LES IS RIGHT

SPIROS PLS MY LOVE COME BAck to MRS DURRELLS

this play is gonna be a shit show I love it

LMAO NIKOS

I need me a Greek babe

“You’re a siren” “obviously” wow I missed Florence 😂

SPIROS IS BACK😭

“I’m realizing that precious things end” THE PAIN THIS IS CAUSING ME

SPIROS IS SO IN LOVE STOP

“LOUISA.. LOUISA..LOUISA” JUST KISS ALREADY !!!

LUGA DAMN IT STOP COCKBLOCKING LMAOO

Theo don’t come with the bad news already please

“Look at me” fuck Theo is so serious and it’s paining him to say it 😭

also not the time to say but I love that he has a pimp cane

Theo can’t even tell Gerry the truth this is so subtly painful

SEX WORSHIP

I love how everyone including Florence knows Margo is planning to have sex LMAO

THE CYCLOPS MASK LMFSO ITLL BE IN MY NIGHTMARES

oh shit here comes the fascism fuck

THE TYPEWRITER TOO?

ya have to blast, just take spiros with u

“AND THE EGG WOMAN AT THE MARKET” LMFAOOOOO STOPPP SHE TOLD EVERYONE

hide your kids hide your wife hide your wireless

“You’ve been so good to me Theo” stop Gerry 😭

They’re Setting animals free I can’t deal with this

i am so emotional

Louisa is in such denial that they’ll have to leave and honestly SO AM I

“Like you and Spiros” RIGHT!! THEYRE SO IN LOVE

4 seasons later and I still want white pants like Louisa’s

Florence really said ill expose your medical records LMAO

“Louisa” GET A ROOM YOU TOO

LOUISA WTF WHY SAY NO? GO TAKE HIM TO BED RN

"Where do you want to go? .."To heaven"..”I know the way.." Im going to have some type of aneurysm I can’t deal like  GOD THIS IS ALL IVE WANTED!! THEYRE SO LOVEY AND HAPPY AND UGHSH WHY CANT THIS LAST FORVER

BUT HERE COMES ANOTHER COCKBLOCKER ..OF COURSE

BASIL WAS KILLED? OH SHIT WHAT

oh my I didn’t expect that 😭

“I’m afraid we have to leave Corfu” 💔 knife in my heart

“Come with us” PLEASE DO

“We still have a future” her heart is breaking and so is mine !!

SPIROS NO! COME BACK! PLEASE

I feel my heart literally throbbing in pain

AUNT HERMONIE’S GHOST!! BASIL’S TOO! STOP THIS (I knew ThTs the only way she could’ve been in this but still!! Shook)

Louisa is going to run after her man now right

.. or not

Margo says some secretly wise things every now and again

“The house.. breathing”

They’re all restless in bed & so am I right now bc this is too much for me

I literally have CHEST PAIN RIGHT NOW JUST BC I KNOW WHATS COMING

Larry as a spy is killing me lmao

All these people came to see the play😭😭

Even Pavlos!

LMAOO THIS REMINDS ME OF WHEN MY BROTHER WAS IN THE ODYSSEY FOR SOME EVENT IN HS - ISSA SHIT SHOW AND IM LIVING FOR IT

FUCK IT’s HAPPENING NOW

CONFRONT YOUR MAN LOUISA !!  

THE RUNNING ! THE WHITE CLOTHES ! THE BEACH ! THIS IS BEAUTIFULLY CINEMATIC

FUCK SHE JUST RAN UP AND KISSED HIM GOD SHSJSJWMS OMF FF

HE’S LIFTING HER OFF THE GROUND!!

WHAT A PERFECT KISS

“I LOVE YOU” ..“I LOVE YOu” I LOVE THIS!

“..A bed not too big so we’re always touching”

SOMEONE CALL 911 I AM NOT BREATHING JAJSSJJS FUCKKKKKK

“ I can’t go with you to England” I AM WEEPING

THE WAY SHE FELL I CANT

I KNEW IT WAS HAPPENING BUT IT HURTS SO BADDDDD

“You’ll be beautiful and complicated “ FUCK ME I WANNA JUMP OFF A CLIFF

“You’ll go on and spread the magic and I won’t be here”

“You will Be here” I THINK I AM HAVING AN ANNERYUSM

“Has it all been for nothing?” CAN U KILL ME

“Would you change it for us never having met..?” JESUS LORD PLEASE TAKE ME NOW I CANT TAKE THIS

THEYRE HOLDING EACH OTHER ON THE BEACH AND CRYING

OH MY GOD

OH MY GOD

NO ONE IS HOLDING ME AND IM CRYING 😭😭

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK

YOU CANT JUST BREAK MY HEART AND GO

 ZOLATN PULLED UP

IM WEAK LMAOO HE CAME FOR MARGO I LOVE IT

BUT THE LAUGHS WONT REPAIR MY SHATTERED HEART

THERE’S NO COMING BACK AFTER THAT LOUISA AND SPIROS MOMENT

but Margo and Zoltan are actually cute

LMAO THEY ALREADY HOOKED UP IM PROUD SJSKKS

But deadass my heart is beating so fast and I’m in pain I can not and will not recover

Larry throwing the script is a mood

Louisa’s monologue I literally want to fling myself into the sun

“For us this has been quite a journey..” 😭😭😭😭

Sven and the damn accordion

“There’s been a lot of messy love since we got here” YOU THINK

! ! they’re all sitting angelically in the Ionian Sea and this is killing me ! ! ! !

Larry isn’t going 😭 spiros will protect

“To the future” PLEASE LET THERE BE A FUTURE ONE DAY ITV I NEED IT

LUGA KISSING LESLIE’S HEAD BROKE ME FURTHER ..HER FAV CHILD

Spiros and Louisa Hugging I just can’t

I can’t do this

I need an inhaler and I don’t even have asthma

I’m drowning in my tears 😭😭

This isn’t fair how can it just BE OVER NOW?$/!/‘s?!?!?

I felt like they weren’t going to show them leaving and now I can continue life in denial and pretend they don’t leave and everyone lived happily ever after !!

I’m not okay at all obviously

I just-

[theprojectatedensgate]

Hey, um, may I request a short fic for Jacob with a tall fem! Deputy? Maybe some worshipping bc she feels insecure about her height? Thank you sm in advance 💕

aww yes why not? Lets have some fluff!

Warning: This is really sappy, I’m a soppy person okay?

“Oh my god why do I have to be so tall?!” Rook growled at the mirror, titling her legs to each side, looking over the length, trying to duck her head into frame. “My legs are too long, I tower over nearly everybody.”

Jacob huffed from his seat it the corner of the room, combat blade carving into a piece of wood. The scraping of the knife filling the silence in the room. Rook ignored his huff, too busy focusing on her insecurity.

 "People say to me “You’re too tall to be a girl. It’s not lady like.” Jacob released a snort at her comment causing her to turn to him with a frown.

 "What? It’s true. I wish I was shorter.“ 

the red head slammed his knife down with an audible Bang! and Rook jumped at the noise, confusion at the source. Jacob raised his deep blue eyes to here, a grimace on his expression and Rook felt like her heart fell into her gut, wondering what she did to make him mad.

 "Don’t say that again.” He grumbled, pointing the blade at her slightly. 

“Say what again?“ 

"That you wished you were shorter.” Rook was perplexed, she didn’t even realise he was paying attention to her rant. Her height had always been a sensitive feature for her, being bullied for it since a young age. She out grew her friends quickly, feeling like the black sheep in the herd. It had helped her physically whenever she did police work, but socially? She felt outcast. She felt like it was the only thing people took note about her, being called “The tall girl” or “That tall woman.” It felt like as long as she was tall, the less people would acknowledge anything else. 

“…Why not?”

 Rook asked hesitantly, she might get an explanation or a shrug of the shoulders, either choice was a possibility for the Seed, Never knowing what way he would react. Jacob looked at her like she had grown two heads when she asked, he liked her tall. He still towered her of course be having a woman who wasn’t far off in height did wonders for his pride. She was beautiful that way, he wouldn’t change anything. Jacob wasn’t expecting to actually explain this to her though, assuming she should just know from all the time they spent together. Talking about feelings was still rough for Jacob, he had bottled and held macho about it for so long he didn’t know how to have these conversations. He knew that people had them in relationships, talks of insecurities and secrets, whispering sweet nothings to each other.Jacob displayed his affection more subtly, putting fresh wood in the fire for her, always leaving a lighter so she could smoke, tucking her in when he leaves early for his duties. He was certainly taken by the Deputy, completely enamoured with her, but telling her to her face was a whole new ball park. 

“Because I said so." 

"Because you said so? What are you my Dad?" 

Jacob raised a brow at her suggestion, a smirk on his face. Rook shook her head at him rolling her eyes and turned back to the mirror, examining her dress. She didn’t seem the type to wear dresses but God was she a dream in them. Jacob observed the hem swaying just above her knees, the material caressing over her thighs. She was a sight for sore eyes and Jacob had seen enough to qualify, gaining some confidence and biting his lip, he spoke up. 

"Come ‘ere Soldier.” he patted his thigh, re-adjusting his position. Rook gingerly paced over, Jacob watched her every step, eyes travelling up her legs and down over her face. She stopped in front of him and he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her to sit on his knee. His hands braced the back of her, holding her flush against him. 

“Now listen. Don’t ever say you wish you were shorter. Your height just extends how beautiful you are.” Rook blushed at the praise, he had never called her beautiful, she tensed in his lap slightly and he adjusted his grip on her to be firmer. “The taller you are, the more of you I can appraise, your body is a river of strength and the view of it just takes my breath away.”. Rook’s voice snagged in her throat, coming out a whine instead. It was so unlike him to say these things, their love never being communicated verbally, always with intimate touches or exchanging soft glances. Jacob held her so she was above him slightly and peering into her eyes, his blue orbs searching her soul. Rook tell by his look, he meant every word, he truly adored her. Her frame just being one of the many assets she had. His hands ran up her back in slow deliberate movements, callouses pressing into her feeling the softness of her skin. “Don’t ever listen to what anyone else says about it, they don’t have the skills to comprehend such beauty in tenacity. You listen to me and only me, clear Soldier?” Rook’s face was flushed now, she was overwhelmed with love and self pride at Jacob’s words. It was so unusual of him too, if he was making the effort to reassure her, he was serious. She stared back at him doe eye’s, full of trust. 

“Yes Jacob." She giggled nodding her head, all the praise had gone to her head making her giddy. Jacob stroked down her back, tapping the back of her thigh. “Good. Don’t doubt yourself, don’t doubt me either. I know true perfection when I see it and I see it every day when I look at you.”. Rook placed a gentle kiss onto his lips. 

“Thank you, Jacob. For loving me this way.” Rook pulled back to look into Jacob, he returned the favour, getting lost in each others eyes.

 "Only you.“ Jacob whispered. ”Only you…“ 

Thanks for the request! Hope you enjoyed it! It was lovely to write!

[saltwaterships]

Characters: Klavier Gavin, Vera Misham

from Ace Attorney

I’ve never done one of these proper fic posts, but I’d really like to elaborate on this idea so I think I’ll give it a try.

I feel like Klavier’s characterization was a let-down in so many ways. After playing around with ideas from the Drew Misham case, I thought about Klavier. He seems really cool and composed in the game (mind you, its been a while since I played it) and it just didn’t sit right with me. I wanted to write a fic that expresses Klavier’s feelings properly, regarding the end of AJ.

I wrote this around Vera bc I love her, and love writing about her experience. This fic actually came about because I love thinking about new ways to tell her case so I felt it necessary to include her. Not sure how long this will be, or how many characters I will add in. I definitely fell in love with the idea of Vera and Klavier supporting each other and being able to talk to one another.

Hope you enjoy!

It was a difficult time in the life of prosecutor and rockstar, Klavier Gavin. He was in the process of questioning all of his relationships,  He couldn't have known his brother would do something like this? His own bandmate? That's one story, but his brother- who he had known all his life, was another. He felt guilt and fear and he felt abandoned. But he himself could not say what he felt because he felt too much all at once. How could he forgive his brother? Was it his fault? Something he could have done? Could he have changed the future?

How would Klavier continue his life? He had money, which was a great start. Fans, fans, people were generally friendly to him, he did not lack an abundance of admiration or wealth. What he lacked was maybe love, maybe it was true friendship, and he had done well without it until this point. He felt like he was at an end, he really couldn't end his life but he could not imagine his life continuing. What was in store for him? He had made many accomplishments in his life, two of his biggest turned out to be the cause of much horror.

He almost didn't want to hear other people talk. Didn't want to talk to people, for the first time in his life. What his brother had done was awful and he was awful for sharing his name. He wanted people to forget who he was, if anyone would talk to him he would like them to treat him like someone who was not related to a murderer. But how could he ignore what his brother had done? Why should anyone? At the same exact time he believed people should treat him awful but they should also treat him like he was not significant at all. What a selfish prick.

It was about his feelings now. What didn't he feel? But what did he feel? He didn't want to know what he felt, he would never figure it out, anyways. He was distraught, he was angry, he was sad, but he didn't feel an ounce of it.

Did he get help? Yes. Did it take time? Yes. It took him long enough to reach a point of stability. How he felt now took him back to the days before therapy, before medication. He was a burden, selfish, jealous, he was (not his words) a monster. Deep down he knew he wasn't really all these things, he was a lovable human being, and he, himself was loving. He cared for people and he cared so much, he cared  more than anyone else could ever know. And at this extent, he felt anger, sadness and jealousy in similar intensities. And now it was all coming back. The worst he had ever been.

Just as he thought his entire life was up in smoke, he remembered the victim. He was sorry for the him; Klavier knew that Drew Misham's life was not the easiest but felt a little comfort knowing the man truly cared for his daughter. Everything he did was to benefit her well-being. And how did her life turn out? Who would she become? If she survived, that is.

Klavier's attention shifted to the girl. Would it kill him to pay her a visit? No, not at all. Although, it could make him feel worse. But he wouldn't die. It would be fine. Or maybe it wouldn't, he just needed to go. Her life was in his hands now.

He arrived at her hospital room the next day. He realized he could have been too late but he was a sour piece of shit anyways. The nerve of him. A young woman's life was in danger and he – just forget it. He was here. He was beat to the punch by Phoenix, Apollo and Trucy. It wasn't a competition. In reality he knew he was not responsible for this girl. He knew it somewhere deep down. He could not find it at that moment. He did not know.

As he looked at her, his heart pounded. Memories came flooding back; emotions he tried so hard to keep away. Fuck it all. He wanted to leave. He wanted to leave. He was leaving. He was leaving. He was responsible for this. Why wasn't it him in this hospital bed? Why was he lying to himself. He had it good compared to her. He had it bad, but she had nothing. She had some things but she didn't have the things he had. She would have to start her life over. His was ending. Maybe he was responsible for this after all. Maybe he should stay.

So he sat himself down on a chair next to her bed. He put his head in his hands as if to keep his emotions at bay. He was kidding himself but he did it. He was actually a wreck but he soon learned that if he didn't look at the girl and pretended he wasn't in a hospital bed, he still felt like crap but he didn't feel guilty. What a faulty human being. Waste of space.

He must have been sitting there for hours. Well, five minutes. He finally looked at her again. She was awake. She was looking at him, possibly staring. She closed her eyes again. She must have hated him. He felt sick. He wanted to disappear.

“Look, I'm sorry.” He worried he sounded too aggressive. Maybe he was being too passive.

She nodded her head and said, “It's okay.”

He wanted to scream.

“I did awful things. My brother did awful things.” He knew he was calm this time.

She looked at him briefly. She looked away as her eyes teared up.

“I'm sorry.” He repeated.

“Mhmm.” All he could hear was her heavy breathing and her hidden tears.

What on Earth would he give to make her suffering go away? She didn't deserve this. But he didn't know what to do. She wasn't immediately impressed by who he was, nor was he being very charming at that moment. He was an ordinary, an ordinary Joe. To her.

“I didn't want to make you feel bad, Vera.” He said it. Her name. It was one of the most painful things he ever had to say. Not that he had to. “I feel bad.” He paused, he didn't want to repeat himself a million times. He came here to talk to her. But he felt disconnected from her. He didn't want to touch her shoulder or her hand, he didn't think she would like it if he got any closer. He wasn't exactly comfortable, with their distance they may as well have been on opposite sides of the room. “Vera, do you understand me?”

“Yes” She barely looked at him. Poor girl. “It's not your fault.” She sounded insincere from trying to be nice. Maybe she meant it.

But it worked for Klavier. He believed her.

“Vera, I think I know, I know it's not,” He placed his hand on her bed, “but this,” he cleared the tears in his eyes, “is painful for me. It's painful for you. I don't want you to feel this pain.” Klavier took his hand in hers, not sure if she would be comfortable with it. He should have asked.

“It was scary.” Vera looked him in the eye for a short moment, but it meant the world to him. He saw her pain, it made him want to heal her. Healing her would be the first step to healing himself. It sounded selfish but they both needed the same thing.

“You are a brave girl.” He let go of her hand. He wanted to cry but he didn't. He was coming back to his normal self. For a bit. “I want to know if you know what to do when you leave here.”

Vera looked thoughtful for a second, “what do you mean?”

“Where are you going to live?”

“Oh, I have a home.” He couldn't read her.

“Aren't you afraid?”

“He's gone, isn't he? .....I'm sure he is...” The amount of fear she showed was horrifying to Klavier. That was his brother, and although she was definitely right to be afraid, it hut him. He hoped to get over it.

“I promise that he is gone. There is nothing to be afraid of anymore.” He felt silly for pursuing. But what if he could really help this girl? He looked Vera in the eye, trying to get her to look back but it was fine either way. “Vera, are you afraid of me?”

She shook her head. She couldn't say, though. Did he scare her? She was always afraid these days and knew it wasn't only him. “No” Although, was he here to torture her?

“Vera...” He worried when he saw her expression, it was like she was lost, a bit like if the world around her wasn't real. But she was living through the unfortunate consequences. “I think you....you need a bit more time...” He brushed his fingers across his face to wipe away his tears as subtly as possible. It hurt him to see her that way, but he was sure now that he really wanted to help her. He was afraid of doing something out of pity but this was a girl in great need of help; she just lost her dad, she had no one in her life. Maybe she had money, she had a home, and Phoenix and the others would care for her, no doubt. But he didn't think it was enough, he had, the kind of help she could not get from all that.

Vera looked at him, unsure of what to say. She didn't understand what he meant but she didn't want to ask for many reasons. If she was going to die, well it was the best time for it. As for him being with her, she didn't get why he would show up. She was happy, but a little uncomfortable, it was fine.

He was afraid of being too pushy and he wondered if she wanted his help at all.

[roroslatenightthoughts]

Sin City

Spent the weekend blissfully lost in a group of beautiful ABGs. Nobody knew me, really. Other than my name, it was the perfect solution to the “my name precedes me” thing that I had been encountering after moving back home.

There was a blur of little moments, living so in the moment that not much was committing to memory. 

But I can feel the memories already blurring away. I just have to let this out somewhere, so here we go.

Friday, June 21st (the first day of summer, my period, and the summer solstice).

Jody’s flight got delayed by 4 hour (at least) and I found myself drowning in intimidation. These girls knew exactly how to do their hair and makeup, what to wear, etc. Found myself regaining some confidence as I successfully put on lashes (really well too, tbh) for the first time since I was 18yo about to perform at recital and was empowered to ditch my Spanx.

While we were waiting in line for Wynn’s XS Nightclub someone raised his voice at me, “Hey, I know you.” I subtly rolled my eyes, assuming he was the first creep of the trip. But then, “It’s Rochelle, right?” I passed along the velvet rope to get a closer look at him. “Arsenio,” he said. The name didn’t ring a bell. 

“I’m Annie’s cousin.” 

“Annie, who?” 

“Luspo!”

“Ohhh, Christy?!”

“Yeah, we met when I was staying at her house in Houston. I think we’re friends on Facebook.”

I quickly looked him up. He was right. Our mutual friends shook the cobwebs from the old connection. It had been TEN YEARS since he last saw me, completely crazy. We tried meeting up for shots in the club, but it didn’t work out. He said he was living in the Bay area now. I looked up his profile, he has a 3-year-old kid now. 

We spent the majority of our Friday evening tediously scouring XS for a table, waiting for Jody, and denying the inevitable fact that a group of 13 young women were not about to ALL get drinks at the same table let alone maneuver a dark nightclub without getting separated. 

We hunted for tables big enough for the majority of us, got half-assed efforts from promoters, and eventually some guy rounded us all up to his table for [free] drinks. It was there that we meet the “thirty-something” Miami guy. We danced, he twirled me, someone later told me they thought he was gay, it definitely didn’t feel like it (but then again, I literally have the world’s worst gay-dar). He even gave me a lap dance -- what an odd feeling to have someone’s nuts rub on your leg... blegh.

We eventually left their table and stopped like ten feet away (the crowd was thick enough to be out of obvious vision). My feet were screaming and I asked if I could sit. He had a sleeve of tattoos -- hello, talking points! At this point I could have talked for hours as long as it meant that I could sit. I don’t really remember his face, but it felt like I had him wrapped around my finger. At one point I was sneaking ice cubes out of their bucket because I was that desperate for some hydration. He said something about being warm, and I don’t know what came over me but  I instinctively leaned in and asked “Did you say you’re getting hot? Come here.” Our faces were close enough and just said “kiss me” before passing an ice cube into his mouth. It was the smoothest and sexiest I’ve ever felt in my life. 

I nonchalantly pull away and feel completely detached from the romantic gesture. He boyishly blurts out, “Thanks for making me look cool in front of my friends.” I’m glad it was dark so I could hide my chuckle. Finally, we head home and we recap the night over Chex Mix and Gardetto’s. Night ended around 2-3am.

Saturday:

Woke up around 8am (I think) and continued recapping the night. Realized my feet were insanely dirty from walking around the hotels and drop-offs sans shoes. We started getting ready for day club and I accept 

omg i’m tired of writing. here comes the word/phrase vomit.

AB&G smoothie, morton’s neuroma, small boob insecurity, “thicc” girl empowerment, big boob empowerment. lowkey strutting and hopping around the suite proud of the muscle on my legs, jiggle on my chest, and less fat at my abdomen than 7 months ago. looking like bougie bruno mars as a woman. fhearing those first beats at day club. USC med alumni. “what job would you have?” “I would enjoy being a PT,” “I’d be humans of new york,” “I’m just now starting to pay off my loans,” his name was Patrick, he’s a urologist either “operating or in clinic.” the exotic Mediterranean guy “She just like a fun, nice girl.” Billy was just one of the cute guys, idk i naturally kept tabs on him i think. Felt like I was successfully flirting with and then getting subtly rejected by Nikolai - with the twin friends (ft. dance move guy), he is an electrical engineer graduated from UCSB who would get a 2x4 lego tattoo if anything and taught me a few phrases in French - because I assumed he’d rather get with one of the girls in the group (Later on Payne would convince me otherwise - that he kept looking around for me and was just talking to everyone because I kept leaving, classic Rochelle scenario, no?). The support I felt when they all encouraged me to go after him. One of the doctors didn’t pick up on my sarcasm when I said he was the oldest (obviously the youngest), it was sweet to see all his friends play along and to have his thirsty ass wanna make me his girl hahah. Some guy named Ty who was turning 21, filipino with great tats - ended up asking for his insta bc i kept running into him. OMG the handsome, potentially gay Black man who stopped me as I got out of the pool and lowkey-strutted towards the bathroom with a “girl you are naturally gorgeous - and you know it!” ugh idk why but it was the most believable comment I’ve ever gotten from a passerby (along with the random ladies that would compliment me omg i cry).

For a while I thought everybody bailed on me and left me with Nickolai just as things were fizzling out. But thankfully we found Kim, Payne, and Mary. We weaved through the crowd, over velvet ropes, and just danced our asses off to Marshmallo’s set. As we were gathering our things at the locker, Jody happened to be walking by (I swear, technology is the biggest cockblock for serendipity). I hadn’t had enough of Day Club at that point so I stayed and saw Jody and Kathleen in action with these guys at their lounge area. Man they really committed to fishing. Finally the delirium of Day Club became a bit overwhelming and we made our way back to the hotel. At this point I felt natural and confident enough to shower naked in front of an also naked Kim. It’s amazing how much confidence I had on reserve strictly from a fresh bikini wax and the knowledge that I’ve been consistently active.

Freshly showered and freshly napped, we started getting ready for Night Swim. (Seriously, the partying never really stopped - just paused for attempts at nourishment/rest.) There was something even more heightening about this round. I played up my freshly-fallen bun-curls and took a FIRE selfie on snapchat (although it didn’t get that much feedback, whatevs bc who was i even hoping for feedback FROM?) 

Donning Kathleen’s kimono and my “naked” swimsuit... (man, looking back where did this person come from?) 

Started talking to this Filipino-Black guy in line and his friend in all white came back and asked if we wanted to join them in their cabana. None of the girls wanted to go, but I figured why not? (the guy was so tall, I think this was my subconscious, amateur attempt at jersey chasing LOL) Also they were from Brooklyn, and I’m a sucker for a good nyc story. Bopped back and forth with drinks form their cabana to our lily pad. 

In classic form, I eventually said goodbye to the cabana boys, grabbed someone from the lily pad, and headed off to do laps. This naive, potentially-gay gentleman at the dance floor tried teaching me how to salsa, as I kept reiterating, “honeyyyy, I’m from Houston! I know how to dance!” We met this Brazilian sounding guy literally because he was standing there an just put his hands up -- got us drinks and saw a poor attempt at line dancing in Vegas, encountered a PTA named Jery (classically shocked that I finished school already hehe). Kept encountering this older gentleman who was charming but creepy, gave Katy a lesson in public strutting, and finally circled back to lounge at the lily pad. 

Eventually Katy came over and whisked me away to a table in the pool. About six girls were already there. There were only two guys so of course I assumed my role as a poolside, go-go dancer. I looked down and realized that I recognized this guy’s dance moves from day club!! And sure enough Nikolai was there! I called him over asking why he wasn’t backstage at the Zedd show. Got in the pool and of course dealt with the same ambiguous vibe as earlier that day. 

(At some point during this, Kathleen came over and dropped off my things - holy shit i just looked it up, it was around 1am - and I asked her to take my phone and wallet back to the hotel at the risk of getting it in the water) Kathy had just offered me some WatEr and I ended up just chillin’, enjoying the vibes and visuals by the side of the pool. I vaguely remember seeing Nikolai leave and honestly just dgaf about it. Kathy explained that it was ok to want to feel physical touch so I just leaned the fuck in to the virgin experience and let everyone and their mother scratch my head, massage my back, and just love on each other hahaha we ended up closing the club at like 3:30am or something.

As we were leaving, one of the two guys (the half-Jap-half-Russian who I was initially told was gay - found out his name at like 5am, and then ended up not being gay) bluntly says, “you’re really pretty and I’d like to make out with you” - looking back, it was almost perfect... I was already comfortable with him because he had been [orgasmically] pulling my hair all night and massaging my neck. He said later that he thought he was being obvious in making a move, but i’m pretty sure he was doing that with everyone, esp considering Kathy was deadass wrapped around his back like a monkey lolol he later said he was only pulling my hair, my rolling ass had no fucking clue ahahah

Anyway, I hadn’t had someone suggest making out in so long and had been recently longing for that exactly, so after several minutes of inner turmoil (at this point i was still getting used to him not being gay, but also i was on my period, freshly waxed, and headfirst in my first Experience). I stayed back with Kim and James (literally a total ‘Crazy Rich Asians’ vibe with his british accent and her stunninnnggggggg looks), Kathy, and Mr. Makeout. There was a cool breeze accompanying us on the late night streets of the Strip and we just let ourselves walk and blow away with Mr. Makeout’s EPB/APL. We ended up at their room at the Palazzo and sure enough, when Kathy and Kim went to talk in the bathroom, he point-blank says, “are we gonna make out now?” 

He was odd in his own way -  a balance of nonchalant, poignancy, and just enough flirtation. Stolen smiles and glances had become our forte at this point, I was really wishing that Kathy could see what was happening, and that I hadn’t given my phone away. The three of us decided to leave to give Kim and James some privacy. Kathy lagged behind to talk to Kim and we continued to make out in the hallway. Kissing him was somehow so erotic yet so professional/respectful. 

The sun was beginning to come up as we headed to the guys’r extra room at Caesar’s and awkwardly laid in bed, in our swim suits, unable to sleep, just waiting for Kim to need us since we had a key card. Let me just say that damn Kathy is such a good friend. She had her phone out the whole time even though battery was draining fast, making sure that Kim felt safe and that she wasn’t ubering alone or anything.

There was a moment that Kathy was going to leave and I was going to stay back with Daniel (I now knew his name), I decided against it and as I got out of the bed he beautifully clung to my waist with his previously whispered “I’d like to make love to you” twirling through my head. I playfully tried getting away, knowing full well that he had me locked down (If I was smart at all, I would have remembered James’ subtle mention that Daniel brought a NCAA National Judo Title back to Harvard, i.e. their ALMA MATER, which I barely cared about at this point because I was so out of it haha). We convinced him to come back to the Venetian/Palazzo with us (and he paid for the taxi, bless).

We kept stealing a few kisses in various lobbies as Kathy essentially babysat all of us lmao. Before heading up to our room, I threw my number onto his phone internally plotting how I can sneak away to him. After all, it was only 6am at this point and everyone was deadass asleep. 

Immediately I realized how not sleepy I was in comparison to everyone sprawled out on their air mattresses. I updated Katy and Jody and replied to his immediate texts:

“Hello

OK come now.

Can we make out a little more?”

I trotted out of the room in a sun dress, no bra, and my bikini bottoms. I told you, it was the start of Cancer season. Walked through the adjoining hotels (seriously, how convenient) and eventually he found me. 

“You changed”

“Well I didn’t really want to walk around in a sheer kimono at 7am,” then alluding to the lack of bra underneath. 

He was surprisingly disciplined in the elevator, undoubtedly catching me smiling in anticipation for his lips to be back on mine. Thankfully, he deviated towards a corner wall to kiss for a bit before heading down a very long hallway. It was the most seamless a makeout has felt in a long time. We were eye to eye whenever I’d rise up onto the balls of my feet. I grabbed at his jet black hair and his hands ran all over me with an energy I’d never felt before - I had gotten used to greedy hands on me... his were appreciative, almost even respectful. I could feel him near the hem of my dress and he’d lightly lift it up, but never yanked at it or slid it up too high... we continued down the long hallway with the same style of kissing, even getting caught by a couple, oops hehe. 

We got to the room and decided to continue in the [pleasantly spacious and conveniently mirrored] full bathroom. Knowing fully well that we only had time to makeout, we started slow, just weaving back and forth. We took our time, taking turns unbuttoning each others tops, one by one, kissing to celebrate the each exposure of new skin (forgetting the fact that we were already half naked when we met or that we had already laid next to one another in our underwear). 

Eventually the clothes were off and he didn’t question when I said that underwear has to stay on. It was 45 minutes of bliss. He leaned against the counter for the majority of the time and our hands ran free, up and down each other’s bodies. His musculature perfectly balanced - I seriously don’t think I’ve ever been so dumbfounded, I literally had no critiques. But I couldn’t properly articulate myself because I was so shocked by his whispers and praises.

“You’re so pretty... You’re so cute... You’re so hot... You have the most incredible body,” as he appeared to blink in what looked like disbelief. For once, I actually believed a man’s compliments on my body...

 “I was trying to talk to you all night,” he said as I stared back in disbelief reminding him that his hands were on all the other girls as well. “You have so many dang friends, I didn’t know how to get alone... and then you disappeared, I couldn’t find you.” We continued kissing through all this recapping and sure enough, he blessed me with that same, firm hair pull.

We ended up laying on the floor towards the end, him teasing me with the words, “I really want to eat you out” - BUT OF COURSE, I was on my period at a time when I’d never been more willing to do it. His lips were so luscious and our tongues had already become well-acquainted at this point. He told me to lay on the floor and his hands just explored my lower abdomen and superficial pelvis... it felt beautifully similar to the scene in “Pretty Woman” where Richard Gere goes from playing the piano to playing Julia Roberts’ body....  it was just pure bliss, I’d never been so happy to be in a hotel bathroom at 7am. And as we ached over the fleeting minutes, eventually we heard James fumbling for the bathroom knob, I doubled over in giggles as I fumbled for clothes to cover my mostly naked self. “I’m not done exploring you yet...” he said with a tone of sadness as we departed, again not realizing that I was plotting to return to him. I wasn’t done either.

I’m going to stop writing soon, but I ended up going back to his room (sans James) after Jody left. We had about an hour, “You just always leave me. I booked my flight for 11:30 after you left. I didn’t think I’d get to see you again.”

We kissed slowly, obviously running on depleted energy reserves, and eventually ramping up to the same enthusiasm as earlier that morning.

“I wish I had a video of you doing that,” alluding to my practically-rehearsed minx crawl over his supine body. To which he countered with the masculine version when it was his time to be on top. However, I think I reached a completely new capacity of physical attraction as I laid on the bed with him standing, holding my hips. Every time his hips thrusted forward, his chest and delts contracted with each pulse.... I’d never been with a physique like that, ever. I don’t know what came over me but eventually I was going down with an enthusiasm I hadn’t felt in years, genuinely wanting to kiss him just everywhere. I was lasting a lot longer than usual. I could feel him squirming and just when I thought he was going to finish - he blurted “I just want to fuck you” as he simultaneously tossed me to the head of the bed and held himself over me - it was performed so swiftly and smoothly that I officially have a newfound sexual respect for guys who do Judo. It almost felt like a couples tango... I just laid there, sprawled out in complete disbelief, realizing that I reallyyyy wanted him back in me. We wrestled with the idea but there were no condoms left and I wasn’t on birth control - I had to bite my tongue to prevent myself from discussing the significantly decreased likelihood of getting pregnant when on your period, but luckily he reminded me that we’re a couple of strangers, a couple of mature adults. Eventually time caught up with us  and with rosy-cheeks we left his room. I lamely asked if we could hold hands to which he said, “of course.” I could feel his smile next to me in the elevator and gave each other a quick kiss before he headed to the lobby and I sped off to the Venetian to clean up my things before check out.

 At one point we were just laying there and he said those perfect words, “this is all I really wanted.” I didn’t fully believe him, but I nodded in agreement because it truly felt wonderful.

(Sidenote: I initially started this post because I was resisting texting Mr. Makeout. I caved and started drafting a message, but I kept backspacing because I didn’t actually know what I wanted to say. Finally got frustrated and gave up on keeping contact, phew glad that period of desperation is over with)