#sub!toto Wolff | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

h-c-u · 1 year ago

Text

Keep your eyes open

Summary: Mirror sex. Nothing else. Not even a crumb of plot.

Pairing: Toto Wolff x fem!reader (no y/n, just honorifics)

W/C: 4k

Rating: +18, age Gap, size difference, praise kink, oral hyper-fixation, marking, overstimulation, soft!dom/sub

A/N: I'm back, bitches! xD Bon Appétit <3

Masterlist | List of tags

Was the whole room vibrating, or was it just you...? Your mind needed a moment to focus and find yourself back in reality.

Your whole body felt dangerously hot, even though your skin was covered in the thin layer of sweat and you could feel your hair sticking to your face. Your breath was irregular, and heavy, as if you were drowning and someone just pulled you to the surface, and you were trying your best to get enough oxygen into your lungs. Your heart was beating so intensely that you could feel it even in your fingertips and toes... There was a metallic taste on your tongue, and you realised that you bit your lower lip so hard that you drew blood, but you were too overwhelmed to feel the pain.

When your breathing finally calmed down, a heavy sweet and salty scent hit your nostrils, invading your brain and reminding you of what just happened.

You were sitting in Toto's lap, although sitting was a very generous word for the state you were in. Your back was tightly pressed against his chest and for once in your life, his skin was colder than yours. That sensation helped your mind remember how to form coherent thoughts. He was using his knees to keep your legs open, letting them hang limp in the air, not able to reach the ground, so even if you could move - you wouldn't be able to escape. Toto's strong arm was holding your torso under your breasts, keeping you in the upright position as his other hand was gently caressing your thigh. Your head was resting on his shoulder, and it felt so heavy, even though you felt as if you were floating somewhere under the ceiling. His cheek was pressed to your temple and in his low, rumbling voice he was whispering things your mind wasn't able to comprehend.

Very slowly you moved your hands and placed them over his, trying to hold onto him even more, because you still felt like you could slip in between the cracks of reality. But the tone alone was able to soothe you in the way nothing else ever could. You could feel his chest vibrating behind you, while his hand moved from your thigh to your abdomen, covering almost all of it. His rough fingers were tracing unrecognisable shapes on your skin giving you goosebumps, but you loved that sensation. A huge smile sprawled across your face as you finally came back to your body.

You gently squeezed his big forearms, letting him know that you were coherent again, and when you did that - he pressed a gentle kiss to the side of your head.

- You want me to do that again...? - he asked in a hushed whisper, and the only thing you could do was nod your head slowly. - You're being so good for me, just let me take care of you... - he pressed another kiss to your head as his hand left your body for a short moment to grab the vibrating wand again, but you stopped him mid-move... Of that, you had enough. - Oh...? - he asked with a fake innocence in his voice. You could hear a sly smile that showed up on his face; you didn't even have to look at him. - You don't want more...? - he teased, even though he already knew exactly what you were asking for.

You let out a quiet mewl of protest, wriggling your hips just a little bit, grinding against his very erect cock, which was gently resting in between your folds, already soaked with your previous releases, but Toto hadn't had his yet... He always took care of you first, no matter what. He even joked sometimes that at his age he might not be able to keep up with you anymore, but that was bullshit because he was almost always able to outlast you; the control he had over his own body... It was something to be admired, especially in moments like this.

- And you think you're ready...? - he asked in a soft, teasing, almost condescending tone as he gently traced his fingers on the inside of your thighs, giving you goosebumps that spread all over your body. His hands rested on your hips for a moment, where his thumbs gently rubbed the skin before he pulled you back, allowing his shaft to slide up, teasing your clit along the way, which drew another twitch from your body. You couldn't help but part your lips, letting out a soft whine from between them, as his hand travelled up your body, teasing your nipples, until he reached your jaw, where his delicate touch tightened. He roughly grabbed you and forced you to look in the mirror in front of you.

You looked absolutely obscene...

Your eyes looked like they were made of glass, your lips were swollen and puffed from constant biting, and your skin glistened in the soft, dim light. Your neck and shoulders were covered in hickeys and bitemarks, already filling up with crimson. Before your gaze travelled lower, you looked up, to catch Toto's grin, but it was far from malicious; he resembled a proud cat, who presented the fruits of his bountiful hunt. He gently nudged your temple with his nose and playfully bit the top of your ear when he noticed you were looking at him, and you couldn't help but chuckle at the sight. But it wasn't long before he guided your head forward again so you could go back to examining your body.

Your hair was a mess, sticking not only to your own flushed skin, but also to Toto's, and your nipples stood proudly erect from all the stimulation, and just by looking at them you could feel them tensing even more. You were spread open by his legs, your most vulnerable parts exposed and displayed... Well... They were just a minute ago, but right in the reflection they were hidden behind a long, thick cock, which tip reached your navel, and just the sight of it made you swallow.

When you saw it for the first time, you were convinced there was no chance he'd ever fit inside you, but somehow he made it fit.

As if out of its own volition, your hand travelled to his shaft, and as soon as your fingers traced the length, Toto hissed quietly in your ear, which made you retreat and look down, but that didn't help, because instead of a reflection, your gaze met the real thing and you instantly started salivating. The smooth texture of a dark pink tip was almost glistening in the soft light, and you could see how tensely the skin was stretched over the girth, giving the impression that it was almost too thick to be contained. Every vein was not only visible but practically emphasized... And when it suddenly twitched and touched your abdomen - there was a sticky spot of precum left on your skin.

- I asked you a question, Angel... - he said with a playful grin, and you instantly looked up to catch his beautiful chocolate eyes staring back at you from the mirror. You swallowed loudly and looked down again as if to make sure, you knew what you were getting yourself into. Or rather what you were about to get inside you.

But somehow words eluded you, so instead you just nodded slowly without breaking eye contact with Toto's reflection.

- Well, if you're sure... - he chuckled quietly... - But first I need you to promise me one thing. Do you think you can do that for me...? - he asked, the cunning smile still echoing in his voice. You nodded again, and he licked your exposed neck, soothing the nasty bite he already left there. When he looked at you again, his gaze darkened. - Keep your eyes open. - he said in a stern voice, and you couldn't help but swallow, because you knew what was about to come, and even though every cell in your body craved it, you were aware that it wasn’t going to be possible without a certain amount of pain. - Yeah...? - he asked after not receiving any confirmation from you.

- Yeah... - it was all you were able to say, your voice still strained and raspy from all the screaming.

- Good girl... - he growled and playfully bit your earlobe, at the same time pulling you even closer into him. You almost closed your eyes when his hands started moving down your body, but you stopped yourself at the last second and looked in the mirror again. Your gaze was pulled to Toto's hands under your thighs, where he gave you a gentle squeeze, letting you know to get ready and relax, before lifting you until his thick tip was pressed against your entrance, and suddenly you weren't so sure if you were ready. He looked almost comically big next to you.

But then he started slowly lowering you, and it was too late to back out. At first, there was only the pressure of his smooth head pushing against your opening, without being able to penetrate, until suddenly his cock slid forward on a slippery mess, shot up gliding between your folds and teasing your clit, which forced a loud squeal from between your lips. You could feel his chest moving behind you, as he tried to mask a chuckle. But he didn't say anything... Instead, he pressed a long kiss to your shoulder and lifted you again.

For a moment you thought that the scenario would repeat itself when that pressure at your entrance grew, but then your already relaxed body lost the battle and gave in, swallowing almost a third of his shaft in one go, driving all air from your lungs in a loud squeak. It took a good few seconds for your brain to process the stimuli, and for a moment you didn't even feel the burning pain of being stretched so much that clenching was impossible, but when it hit you, tears almost instantly started gathering in the corners of your eyes... It was all too much, and a single sob left your mouth.

- Oh, I know it hurts, Angel, I'm sorry... - Toto whispered straight into your ear and rubbed his cheek against your temple. - You're being so good for me, taking me so well... - he continued praising you; his hot breath whiffed over your skin causing almost painful goosebumps. You sniffled quietly and mumbled something your brain couldn't comprehend at the moment, your nervous system completely flooded with the sensations coming from inside of you. - Hmmm? What's that? - he made sure that you didn't use your safe word, but you only weakly repeated the quiet plea. - No, baby, we can't stop yet, I'm not even halfway there and your pussy is too pretty to be half empty... - your sobs grew a little bit louder, and the tears finally overflowed and started streaming down your cheeks. - Shhh, shhh, shhhhhh... It's OK if you cry, you're safe, I promise... I love you so much... - his praise made something in your chest bloom and a familiar warmth spilled from that area... You took one deep breath and nodded, letting him know you were ready to continue.

You let your head roll back and rest on his shoulder while his fingers dug into your flesh as he slowly lifted you again in the air. The thickness of his cock pressed against every single spot inside you on its way out, and you let out another sob, this time louder and you could almost feel him smiling, even though you couldn't see his face from this angle, your nose buried in his neck. Your lips latched onto his skin and you started sucking, trying to distract yourself at least a little from the burning pain coming from between your legs.

He didn't let his whole length leave your body to give you a short break, and as soon as the head was about to pop out of you, he started lowering you again almost mechanically, not speeding up or slowing down, allowing you to get used to the sensations. Before your lips left his skin, you gave him a playful bite over the hickey and rubbed your tears away on his neck and with your own shoulder, because bringing your hands to your face required the amounts of energy you didn't possess at the moment.

You let out a quiet squeal when you felt a familiar pressure against your cervix, and the muscles in your thighs involuntarily clenched. You forced your head up to look in the mirror, but you still didn't have enough strength to keep it upright by yourself, so you rested your temple on Toto's cheek, and the view you saw in front of you almost took your breath away...

Both yours and Toto's skin glistened in the dim warm light, giving the impression that you were covered in a gold mist... Your legs hung loosely in his strong hands, your soft flesh giving into his grip, and every place where his fingers dipped into you looked like a secret oasis of desire, showing how much he didn't want to let you go. You didn't realise that before, but your breath synched with his, or his with yours, and you were moving in perfect harmony, both of your chests rising and falling at the same rhythm as if you were a single organism. And then your gaze travelled lower...

You could see your stomach bulging every time he slowly lowered you down, his massive cock invading your abdomen. You could tell exactly where the tip was and the steady movement almost hypnotized you; you couldn't help yourself and your hand traveled to your stomach, where you could feel him move under the skin. It wasn't the first time you were seeing it, but every time was equally fascinating... Seeing your skin stretching to accommodate something so big, and your opening straining around his girth; he was changing your body in front of your eyes, and you loved it more than you could put into words.

And then he lowered you even more and pain shot through your legs and spine; Toto rammed into your cervix, pushing it back into your body, and you couldn't stop a loud whine that left your lips. Your heart rolled back again, all the sensations too overwhelming to consciously process, so you just let yourself ride it through, trusting him completely.

Toto knew your body well by now, so he squeezed your thighs harder, pulling your attention away from the pain inside you, and he rubbed his cheek against your face, inhaling deeply and allowing your scent to invade his senses.

- You're taking me so well, Angel... So tight for me... - he continued praising you and pressing light kisses everywhere his lips could reach. And with his every word, every thrust, you started to feel the tension building up again, the familiar tightness overtaking your body as his cock constantly stimulated your G spot even with the slightest of moves. You grabbed his forearm with one hand and pressed on your stomach with the other - That's it, baby, that's it... Cum for me, pleeeease cum for me. It's ok, you can do it. - his tone was so soft, putting you at ease and you let yourself go yet again, a quiet moan escaping your lips as your legs involuntarily twitched in his hands, disrupting his steady rhythm, but not stopping completely.

Electricity run through your whole body as the tip of Toto's cock dragged against that spot inside you yet again, and you couldn't stop the loud cry that forced itself from your mouth. Your brain felt fuzzy, and as if it was behind a thick wall, not completely belonging to you. You couldn't lift your head, but your eyes locked with his in the mirror, while sob after quiet sob dropped from between your lips.

- Please... Toto... I can't anymore... - you whined, looking at him with a plea painted all over your face. He only smiled in reply and kissed the top of your head, but he didn't stop moving you up and down, almost like a doll. You wrapped your hands around your body and continued crying as he sped up, your whines matching his moves. But despite the pain and all the stimulation, you didn't close your eyes; after all - he told you not to. And he held your gaze; his eyes darkening with your every plea and you could only see determination in them. He held you even tighter as he continued fucking into you; his thrusts getting faster, more desperate, more erratic. - Toto... I can't... I can't cum anymore... - your voice cracked, tears streaming down your cheeks. Your whole body felt hot and cold at the same time as it hung loosely in his arms and rested against his chest. You barely had enough energy to stay still as he used your body.

- Don't worry, this will be the last one, I promise... I know you can do it, Angel... Here, I'll even go nice and slow to help you a little bit, just to be sure you can take it all, hmmm? - he whispered against your skin and you couldn't even reply coherently, as his movements became more drawn out, more deliberate. He was purposefully angling your body so as much pressure as possible was dragging against that sweet spot inside you at any given moment, and your cries started to mix with moans yet again. - That's it, you're doing amazing... You're such a good girl... Just a little bit longer... - his voice was getting husky and gravely, his breaths shallow and uneven; it couldn't be easy for him to manhandle you like that, but he showed no signs of stopping, continuing to move your body up and down his shaft, a cheeky smile curving his lips as he heard the change in your voice.

Against everything you thought you knew about your body, you started to feel another orgasm approaching; slowly, but unmistakably closing in. You couldn't look away from him, because you knew that if you did, you wouldn't be able to take it any longer and his beautiful dark chocolate eyes were the only thing grounding you in reality.

Your broken sobs became higher the closer you were to the peak, and Toto knew it well, that's why you almost screamed in protest when he suddenly stopped, dropping you completely onto his cock, sheathing it in full inside you.

- Toto... Toto, pleeeeease. Please, please, please, I am so close... - you whined and looked up at him, trying to look into his eyes up close, as if that could help.

- I thought you said you couldn't cum anymore... - he teased with a sly smile and a cold shiver ran through your spine. He wouldn't... He couldn't, right...?

- Nononononono... Please... I was wrong, please... - tears of desperation were streaming down your cheeks, but you couldn't care less.

- Oh, Angel... - his voice was soft and soothing; he could never resist your pleas. He playfully bit the side of your neck and immediately licked it at the same time moving you up again and a quiet squeal tore itself from between your lips. - Just a little bit longer... Can you do that for me...? Can you wait for me...? - he whispered quietly with his nose digging into your cheek, his words composed more from heavy breathing than actual sound.

Instead of replying you just nodded enthusiastically and pressed yourself into his chest even harder; not sure when your own body ended and his began. And then he picked up the speed again, and you just couldn't stop your eyes from rolling back into your head. You had to wrap your arms around yourself, so they wouldn't be flailing widely in the rhythm of Toto's moves. You could feel your breasts bouncing, straining against gravity, the slight sting of skin slapping against skin, the sound filling the room in tandem with other sounds. Moans, growls, whines, and whimpers mixed with each other in an unnamed symphony, accompanied by the loud squelching coming from your pussy.

Toto's fingers dug deeper into your flesh to get a tighter grip; your skin was covered in a layer of sweat and he didn't want to accidentally drop you. And if that meant that you'd be donning bruises in the shape of his fingers for the next few days... Oh well.

You were so fucking close... You could almost taste it with your mouth wide open, willing your body to hold on for just a little bit longer. You didn't even feel your fingernails drawing blood from where you were holding onto yourself.

And then something shifted in the air. Toto's growls became deeper and louder, and you could just tell that he closed his eyes and that his eyebrows gathered closer, focusing on the culmination of today's evening. He started thrusting up, although, in the position you were in, it wasn't easy. His face was pressed into your shoulder, his hot breath giving you goosebumps all over.

It wasn't long before you could feel his cock throbbing and pulsing inside you right before release, and as soon as he released the first spurt of cum right against your cervix, he dropped you onto his cock, wrapped his hand around your waist and with the other reached down ad started rubbing your clit with just enough pressure that you came instantly releasing an exhausted yet satisfied cry, allowing your body to act on its own.

Your legs curled up, your toes crossed each other and your stomach tensed, and if not for Toto's arm, you would have slid down from his lap onto the floor. And then he continued rubbing, as all air left your lungs and you became quiet. Or maybe you screamed...? You weren't quite sure, because the only thing you were able to hear was a loud, rapid heartbeat ringing in your ears, as you were spasming around Toto's giant cock inside you. He made you ride your orgasm to the fullest, relishing in the feeling of your soft walls squeezing around him, as your body twitched uncontrollably until it couldn't anymore.

You were left limply laying in Toto's hold, and after you were able to catch your breath you let out a quiet, raspy chuckle.

- I swear to gods, the things you do to me... - you said with disbelief, your mouth was so dry that when you closed it, your tongue almost stuck to the roof of your mouth. Toto joined you in the quiet laughter, his chest rumbling gently under your back

- Ich liebe dich... - he mumbled and pulled you up his lap, even closer to him than you already were, and hid his face in the nook of your neck, taking a deep breath. You lifted your hand and ran your fingers through his soft hair.

- I love you too... - you chuckled again, not exactly by choice... Your body still didn't belong fully to you and it tried to release all the accumulated tension in any way it could, and that also meant that you still randomly twitched from time to time, but that didn't stop you from noticing that Toto's giant hand found it's way to your abdomen, fingers tracing the bulge he was a cause of. - You're not planning on pulling out, are you... - it was more of a statement than a question and your tone was light, almost like a warm laughter.

- I wouldn't dream about it. - he replied and started sucking on the skin of your shoulder again, and you just knew that you were going to wake up with another load of his cum inside you.

Eventually, you were able to look up at your reflection again, and you didn't even try to hide a giant smile that curved your lips. There was no way you could hide all the bitemarks, hickeys and bruises in the coming days, but neither could he, so at least you were matching.

A/N 2: Please don’t feel obligated/pressured to reblog, because I write mostly for myself. A comment would be appreciated though :) Love, G.

#my writing #Toto Wolff #Toto Wolff fanfiction #Toto Wolff smut #Toto Wolff x reader

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agendabymooner · 8 months ago

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SOMETHING LECHEROUS !!! GEORGE R. X FEM!READER X TOTO W.

summary: this was the only time when someone lucked out with toto's wife. after the austrian grand prix, maybe george should consider winning more.

content warning: smut under the cut (minors dni!), dubcon, pwp, no beta reading, austrian gp 2024 spoilers (ish), threesome (mfm), m!masturbation, cuckolding(ish), oral sex (f receiving), sub!needy!nameless wife (only referred to as 'mrs. wolff), voyeurism, praise kink

note: i have a little hangover but man did that race eat, i just had to write on it. enjoy xx

something sinful (smut) masterlist

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if you’d like to get on one of my taglists, check this post out

mrs. wolff was the most sought-after woman in the paddock despite the ‘wolff’ name being attached to her soul and public image.

everyone knew who she was, having been the mercedes boss’ wife, but it didn’t deter them from ogling whenever she passed by with grace and entrancing presence.

toto knew that. he knew all too well about the ogling, the staring, the subtle glances. and because of that, he would often shadow his wife whenever she came by.

there was an unspoken rule applied by toto: don’t talk to mrs. wolff unless you’re standing feet away from her, don’t ever touch her, don’t ever dream of being with her.

it wasn’t even that he didn’t trust his wife around other people, no. instead, he didn’t trust other people around his wife.

george russell was one of those people. as bad as it sounded, george always found himself unintentionally ogling and staring at mrs. wolff whenever she came by in the brackley factory or in the race tracks. who wouldn’t find her beautiful? she had poise and charm that george couldn’t explain.

hell, george couldn’t blame toto for falling for her grace. or rather, he couldn’t blame his team principal for falling for whatever the fuck she had on.

but there was something about the austrian air that night that led george to saunter towards the woman. was it his victorious ending at the race? george wasn’t certain.

but this was a rare occasion; mrs. wolff never joined the celebratory occasions before, and seeing her here with a nice slit dress and ever ravishing smile drove everyone insane. seeing her here while toto was on the other side of the bar, though…

george could get fired for even trying anything with her, he could admit, but ego was something that every f1 driver had and right now the briton couldn’t refuse the inflation of his. he had to try, especially when she was dressed like she wanted to get it off already.

so that’s what george did: chatted with her and talked with alcohol in their hands. there were a lot of things that george learned to say and not say.

mrs. wolff had the nicest laugh, george could admit, but her lips looking so kissable was just another can of worms that he couldn’t open. especially when toto was somewhere to take the bait and potentially lead his wife to saunter away from the race winner.

george couldn’t lose her now, so he opted to chat with her instead. behind his blue eyes was something forbidden. lust.

he could understand why people ogled mrs. wolff now — she was a walking aphrodisiac, like her pheromones were through the roof and george could sense all of it. they were enough for his trousers to tighten a little.

fuck, he couldn’t have that now. not when…

not when toto’s hand snaked around his wife’s waist and squeezed her hip. not when the atmosphere inside the bar turned hotter when toto came by. not when toto’s head dipped down to feed onto his and her desire and show everyone whose wife mrs. wolff was.

george shifted in his seat, not even looking away from toto’s surprising public display of affection. toto was always professional, but then again he was off-track.

george did the one thing that people rarely got to do: watch toto’s younger wife become needy for the team principal. it was… hot. fuck it really was hot. but he needed more.

and it seemed like toto sensed it too, his hand running through his wife’s hair before grabbing a handful to tilt her head towards george’s direction.

george could tell she was a putty in toto’s hands, her eyes glazed in neediness and desire. toto smirked at the tension that he felt amongst the three of them, nipping on her earlobe as he asked her, “do you think you can do it, mein liebe?”

“yes,” she bit her lip, her hooded eyes trailing at george. the brit could see a lot of lust in her eyes, as if she wasn’t just laughing at some shitty joke he made five minutes ago.

she was an entirely different person, and toto turned her on with a snap of his fingers. seeing her so aroused because of toto made george want her more and the team principal could see it.

toto chuckled softly, nipping her craned neck before telling george, “we’re heading up.”

george could only nod, frozen in his position. what did that even mean?

it seemed as though george’s confusion was all over his face because toto seemed to answer his unspoken question with, “do you want to come along? i know you want to fuck my wife like most people.”

what?

toto smirked, “c’mon, george. lewis would’ve jumped at the chance if he could.”

george wasn’t any better either. this was something that most people wouldn’t ever expect from toto wolff. the man was possessive and wouldn’t let anyone touch his wife.

god must have been playing favourites. but george couldn’t care less. he had the austrian grand prix win and now he got the win that most people would’ve wanted: a night spent with her.

so that was how george found himself stomach flat against the mattress, the woman’s legs spread out while the brit’s tongue lapped at her drenched pussy. her knicker was pulled aside, reverberations in her cunt making her body squirm and her mouth water.

she sought for her husband’s cock, but toto was busy watching them from the armchair he set by the bed. each time she pleaded for toto, all toto said were ‘patience’ or ‘behave yourself.’

george’s being left to pleasure her on his own while toto watched was something that made the brit’s cock twitch in his trousers.

“god, you taste so fucking good,” george murmured between his tongue lapping. she uttered out a moan, making george grind his hips against the mattress for friction.

“toto, please,” she mewled quietly, looking at her sitting husband while toto stroked his thick cock. “lemme taste-“

“i want to hear you whine and moan, schatzi,” toto crooned, pressing a kiss on her forehead, “i want george to hear you moan for him.”

“mmfh-“ she whimpered, her mouth eager to taste her husband. but she couldn’t say much when she felt herself nearing the edge with george’s mouth and fingers. “fuck- george. you- oh fuck george- fuck!”

“yeah, cum on my fingers, darling,” george tutted softly, lapping on her and sucking on her clit while his fingers curled up against her sensitive spot. “give it to me-“

“fuck- yes! oh, fuck,” her body arched and her hips grinned against george’s face, and the british man could’ve cum right there.

george’s cock was agonizingly straining inside his trousers, precum leaking when his lips and chin glistened while she rode out her orgasm and coated his mouth and fingers.

“oh, you sweet little thing,” george cooed at her as he moved up to capture her lips with his. his fingers never left her, only sliding out of her cunt when he unzipped his trousers.

“taste so good, doesn’t she?” toto smirked and chuckled darkly, his eyes darkening at the sight of his wife being ravished by his driver.

“abso-fucking-lutely,” george laughed too, finally taking off his trousers and taking the foil packet that toto tossed his way.

“she loves that,” toto hummed, his eyes never leaving his lust-ridden wife as he licked his lips. but he didn’t dare touch her, enjoying the sight of her. “my wife- ever the sweetest thing who loves getting off with my mouth and my fingers… how about you let her cum in your cock this time, hm?”

“on all fours, doll,” george murmured, helping her into the position as he moved behind. “facing your husband, sweets.”

she was gone. she was certainly gone when she looked at her husband, watching toto stroke the one thing that she wanted in her mouth. heat was rising in her cheeks, her body warming up to 40 degrees as george hooked her arms behind her and slid his cock in slowly.

both her and george let out guttural moans, george’s face turning red in enjoyment as his pace turned moderate.

she looked at toto with half-lidded eyes, biting her lip at the sight of him stroking his cock. it was all too damn good.

“you look so fucked out, liebling,” toto said lowly. she seemed out of it, only nodding to his words. “you’re so gone, aren’t you? so fucked out?”

“yeah… yes,” she stammered hazily, “so good, toto.”

“yeah?”

“yes,” she cried out when george angled to hit her spot repeatedly. “fuck- toto, he’s so good-“

“good girl,” george crooned from behind her, “good fucking girl with a tight cunt- god, you’re so fucking good.”

“fuck her, george,” toto instructed with a smirk, prompting george to smirk too and follow as he was told. “look at that face of hers- she could cum right now and she could cum again and again.”

“oh fuck- yes,” she whined softly, her face scrunching in pleasure as her mouth gaped open. she was overwhelmed with pleasure, unable to keep track of who was talking. “you’re- oh god, george!”

“you’re gonna be the death of me, schatzi,” toto commented, his stroking hand matching george’s thrusting pace. toto groaned out, “fuck her hard. she loves that, george.”

george wasn’t able to contest toto’s command, not when he was there only once. this was a rare occasion, and if it meant that he had to follow her husband’s words then fuck it.

george might as well do the things that people were unable to do with mrs. wolff. if people only knew— he was a lucky bastard to even be able to see her like this while she lusted over toto and him.

♡ moony’s reminder 🅶 (general): @hiraethrhapsody @avaleineandafryingpan @enhacolor @roseandtulips @woweewoowa @magnummagnussen @happy-nico @architect-2015 @hiireadstuff @biancathecool @scorpiomindfuck @stinkyjax @youdontknowmeshh @hyneyedfiz @decafmickey @lightdragonrayne @marknolee @xylinasdiary @anotherblackreader

♡ moony’s reminder 🅴 (explicit edition): @glitterf1 @savrose129 @maxillness @bigsimperika @xoscar03

#george russell imagine #toto wolff imagine #george russell smut #toto wolff smut #gr63 #tw00 #formula one imagine #formula one smut #♛ something multiplied ⎯ poly!f1 smut #♔ something sinful ⎯ f1 smut #f1 #formula 1 smut #george russell #toto wolff

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tpwk-formula1 · 10 months ago

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Masterlist

Masterlist for some of the drivers. I will write for any driver so if you don't see your favorite just send in a request

*** indicates smut

Lee-Lee's Pizza Menu

2024 Kinktober Masterlist

Written Fics and SMAUs

Lewis Hamilton

Lewis x Teammate reader - Cool Down Room***

Lewis x Rosberg! reader - Road head, biting, orgasms***

Lewis x Rival! reader - We Don't Actually Hate Each Other***

Lewis x GF! reader - No, Go Change***

Lewis x GF! reader - Literally Just Porn, Plot Got Lost***

Lewis x Bratty! GF reader - Such a F*cking Brat***

Lewis x rival! reader - Let Me Use Your Mouth***

Lewis x sugar baby! reader - Need it now***

Max Verstappen

Max x Norris! reader - Take A Gummy WIth Me***

Max x Plus size pregnant reader SMAU - She's Pregnant

Max x Dom! reader - Bratty Boy***

Max x Horner! reader - I Don't Like You***

Max x Norris! reader - Just Miss You***

Max x Plus size pregnant reader SMAU - She's Pregnant

Max x Dom! reader - Bratty Boy***

Max x Horner! reader - I Don't Like You***

Max x Norris! reader - Just Miss You***

Max x reader - My Champ and A Baby***

Carlos Sainz

Carlos x Plus size reader SMAU - Thick Thighs Save Lives

Carlos x Rvial! reader - RED!***

Carlos x Leclerc! reader - Morning Routine***

Lando Norris

Lando x Leclerc little sister - Keep it a Secret

Lando x Plus size read SMAU - She Shouldn't Be Your Type

Lando X Fewtrell Twin sister - It was Obvious

Frat! Lando x Rival! reader - Been Waiting Too Long***

Lando x Plus size! Reader - You’re fucking gorgeous***

Lando x Verstappen! Reader - Prerace Rituals***

Lando x Sugar Baby! Reader - You're a Terrible Sugar Baby***

Lando x Sugar Baby! Reader - Come Back to Me***

Lando x Ferrari driver! Reader - I Always Come Back To You***

Lando x Personal Assistant! Reader - I Can Do It Myself (spoiler he can't)***

Lando x Verstappen! reader - I Didn't Give You That***

Lando x Plus Size Fewtrell! reader - Back of The Pack***

Lando x Ditzy! reader - You Cannot Be THAT Blind***

Lando x GF! reader - Making Our Own Movie***

Lando x Piastri! reader - Post Monza Frustrations***

Lando x Piastri! reader - You're Gonna Have My Baby***

Oscar Piastri

Oscar x Norris little sister plus size SMAU - They grow up so fast

Oscar x Fem! reader - I'm Not Sprinting This Time***

Oscar x Ferrari engineer! reader - Orange and Red Make Yellow***

Daniel Riccardo

Daniel x Norris Twin sister - Virgin Diaries***

Daniel x FWB! Reader - Post Singapore***

Charles Leclerc

Charles x Longtime GF! reader - Celebrations and an Orgasm***

Charles x GF! Reader - A little to Rough***

Charles x Injured Driver! reader - Please Just Fuck Me***

Charles x GF! Reader - Mark You Mine***

Charles x virgin! reader - I'm Ready For You***

Logan Sargeant

Logan x GF! Reader - Kiss it Better***

Ollie Bearman

Ollie x Antonelli! Reader - Fighting and Cheating Rumors***

Ollie x Antonelli! Reader - Kimi isn't happy and Ollie's a Giraffe***

Ollie x GF! Reader - WHEN We Get Married***

Ollie x GF! reader - Virgin Diaries***

George Russell

George x GF! reader - Private Moments***

Fernando Alonso

Fernando x Vettel! Reader - Needy and Begging***

Fernando x Rival/TM! Reader - Sleepy Sex***

Fernando x Younger! reader - Please! Just a Quickie***

Franco Colapinto

Franco x GF! Reader - Morning of Monza***

Franco x Albon! Reader - Don't Like Other Men***

Franco x rival! reader - We Fight In Bed Too***

Kimi Antonelli

Kimi x moody! Reader - Grumpy Girl***

Kimi x Bearman! reader - Caught***

Sebastian Vettel

Seb x AM! Reader - The Papaya Isn't a Threat***

Toto Wolff

Toto x Younger GR! Reader - You're Gonna Have My Baby***

POLY FICS AND SMAUs

Landoscar x reader - Figure it out***

Max & Lewis - Bad Race Baku***

Lestappen x reader - A Release***

Lestappen x reader - Bratty Little Thing***

Max & Lewis x GF reader - Fighting, A Brother, and a Sore Ass***

Landoscar x Sugar baby! reader - Buy Your Time***

Paul Aron x Dino Beganovic x GF! reader - First Time Sub***

Kimi x Ollie x reader - Just Take It***

Max F x Lando x Reader - Jealous Men***

Lily Z x Oscar x Pregnant! Reader

TEXT AUs

Telling the grid they didn't make you finish

Sending a Risky Pic (coming 12/6)

#masterlist #formula 1 masterlist

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tommydarlings · 6 months ago

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fucktoy part 4 | f1 grid

pairing: dark!dom!mick schumacher ; dark!dom!toto wolff ; x sub!bimbo!reader

warnings: smut, dacryphilia, possessive behaviour, obsessive behaviour, mentions of tracking somebody’s location, covering mouth???, pussy eating, hair pulling, breeding kink, spitting, gagging

w/c: 0.7k

summary: the f1 grid loves to simply use you as their fucktoy or as a stress relief and nothing else.

check this out: my masterlist <3 // my ko-fi to support me! <3 // my PayPal to support me! <3 // my Patreon to become a member! (get access to +65 works) // Save a Life carrd made by me! <3

Thinking about how mick would keep an eye on you everywhere and every time and get unbelievably mad the seconds he notices you’re somewhere he didn’t allow you to be.

You were partying with your girl friends but forgot to tell mick — but that wasn’t really a problem for him since he tracks your phone and car anyway — which you didn’t know since you’re only his situationship.

He immediately got into his car and drove to the club you were at.

And as you saw him storming into the club with a not so happy facial expression, taking long and angry looking steps right towards you.

And here you were now, being mercilessly thrusted into against the one of the women’s bathroom stalls, mick behind you gripping your hair in a tight grip, his lips grazing your ear.

“You think you can just go out partying or shit like that without letting me know? You could have given me a call… or at least message me but no, you’re dumb little brain didn’t think about that, huh?“ you arched your back further as his thrust got harsher.

You shook your head, trying your best to find some excuse but you came up with nothing.

Mick chuckled, “can’t find any stupid excuse, huh?“ And you only gulped, rolling your eyes into the back of your head.

“Thought so,“ he mumbled before he almost lovingly kissed your wet temple, still mercilessly thrusting into you.

Suddenly, you heard two women entering the restroom, loudly chatting and laughing with each other and just when you were about to release a not so quiet scream of pleasure, mick swiftly covered your mouth with his hand, immediately shutting you up,

“Shh,“ he whispered into your ear from behind, his thrusts not stopping, “just scream into my hand but just so you know I won’t stop.“

Or how toto would literally think and talk about breeding you all the time just so you don’t even spare a glance at the other men in the paddock.

You were in his office, dress bunched up by his big, veiny hand as one of your legs was laying carelessly by its knee on his glass table.

Gasps and whines were constantly leaving your mouth as the older man ate your wet pussy out from behind, collecting all of your juice and spitting into your hole, his hands roughly spreading and squeezing your cheeks.

“O-Oh fuck! Oh god!“ you screamed through gritted teeth, the tip of his tongue rapidly running along your slit, occasionally entering you before sliding out again and spitting on it, being very messy and careless.

He removed one hand from your ass, running his long pointer and middle finger along your drenched cunt before entering you, his lips not biting and sucking on your cheeks, clearly to create prominent marks.

“Mhmm… who were you talking to earlier, meine kleine?“ my little one, toto asked in a raspy tone with a smirk, his two fingers making quick work of deeply entering you and slowly sliding out of you again, repeating that devious process over and over again.

You gulped, “I w-was only talking t-to Charles about-”

“You were talking to Charles, that’s right… and that’s exactly where the problem begins,” toto told you from behind, his fingers speeding up, forcing you to around them as you heard him spitting onto them, making you even wetter.

You whined in a high pitched tone, letting your head fall onto the expensive table half of your shaking figure was laying on.

Toto spoke up, “maybe I should breed you, make your pretty little body all round, hmm? What do you say, liebling?“ love.

You quickly shook your head, you were too young and the two of you weren’t even together, you were just casually hooking up to have some fun and release some pent up stress or anger.

His fingers left your clenching pussy, quickly putting them into his mouth and licking them clean, his eyes still focused on the back of your head, a frown on his face as he noticed how you swiftly shook your head.

Toto slowly stood up, “no? Why not? Then everybody would know that you’re mine and you’d be pregnant with my child! Wouldn’t that be just beautiful? That way I could easily show those immature, young boys that you’re completely off the market,“ he mumbled into your ear from behind before he entered you with his big cock, forcing you to take deep breaths as he slowly filled you up.

“Oh yeah, I’m gonna put a pretty mini version of the two of us into you now, you just relax and let me do it, alright?“

BONUS;

Or how Lewis would have the audacity to make you feel so embarrassingly small and dumb.

CONTINUE READING THE EXTENDED VERSION WITH THE L.H BONUS ON MY PATREON! <3 [1k]

#fanfic #fanfiction #f1 #mick schumacher #mick schumacher x reader #mick schumacher x you #mick Schumacher smut #mick Schumacher x fem!reader #toto wolff x reader #toto wolff #Toto wolff x you #f1 smut #f1 x reader #f1 fanfic #f1 imagine #f1 fic #f1 2024 #mercedes amg f1

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boxboxblog · 4 months ago

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2025 Rookies

Alrighty, now that the Sauber seat has been officially filled, I wanted to do a quick look into the rookies for the 2025 season. I will put out official profiles for them once we get to the 2025 season, for now this will just be quick introductions.

Ollie Bearman for Haas

Technically after Brazil, Bearman (AKA the super-sub) does not qualify as a rookie. However he has never officially had a full year seat, so I consider him one nonetheless. Bearman, a 19-year-old-brit, is a very well known person around F1 paddock. He is a student of the Ferrari Drivers Academy, and has been the reserve driver for both Haas and Ferrari since the beginning of 2024. Bearman is a little bit more known than other reserve drivers because he is one of the few that have had ample opportunity racing F1 cars. He filled in for Carlos Sainz in Jeddah, Kevin Magnussen in Baku, and Magnussen again at Interlagos. In these races he showed strong promise, specially in his first appearance driving with Ferrari when he achieved a P7 finish. He has competed in many series, including F4, F3, and F2. He found his highest success in F4, where he won the Italian Championship and the ADAC Championship. He most recently is competing in the FIA F2 Championship and right now is in 15th, having had a tough year and having missed multiple races to fill in for F1.

2. Kimi Antonelli for Mercedes

Another well known rookie, and Toto Wolff protege (like George Russell was), Antonelli is the only rookie that is going to one of the big boy teams in 2025 and has been part of the Mercedes Junior Team since 20-19. The eighteen-year-old Italian will be the youngest driver on the grid in 2025. He has had a very strong career in single-seater, winning multiple F4 and regional championship and moving through the typical path from F4 to F3 to F2. His most recent series is the FIA F2 Championship where he is currently placed 6th. While he has had no actual F1 racing experience, Antonelli served as Mercedes' test driver in 2024 and has raced in a few free practices for them. He is well known by fans for his close relationship with the Mercedes team and for the fact that he is replacing 7X WDC Lewis Hamilton, who is moving to Ferrari.

3. Gabriel Bortoleto for Sauber

The most recently announced rookie, and by far the least known. Bortoleto is a Brazilian driver whose connection to F1 comes from being part of Fernando Alonso's driver management company and being a McLaren Junior since 2023. He has a huge amount of support among current F1 drivers like Max Verstappen and Oscar Piastri for his seat bid, and was even released by McLaren so he could take the chance to join Sauber. He has had a very strong single-seater career, moving up through the typical global pathway and winning the 2023 F3 season and most recently is leading the 2024 F2 season.

4. Jack Doohan for Alpine

Doohan's name probably sounds familiar, but not in the F1 world. Doohan, the son of MotoGP legend Mick Doohan, has been a widely anticipated driver. Since 2017 he has had strong connections in F1, joining the Red Bull Junior Team that year and switching over to Alpine Academy in 2022. He also served as Alpine's reserve driver from 2023 to 2024, and has spend the last year focusing solely on his role with Alpine. While he has followed the typical global pathway of young drivers to F1, he has also participated in other branches, like WEC in 2022. While he had strong results throughout his career, Doohan has not won any championships since his karting days.

Alright, so those are all of our 2025 rookies, bar Red Bull doing something out of left field with their seats. I hope this was informative and that we can all welcome these rookies with open arms.

Cheers,

-B

#f1 #formula 1 #f1 driver profiles #ollie bearman #kimi antonelli #gabriel bortoleto #jack doohan

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livelaughghoul · 3 months ago

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Omg Idk if it would be too much but would you be down to take the same people of the smash or pass list and have a guess weather they are dom, sub or a switch 😭 based on vibes 😭😭😭😭😭 just for fun I promise

I want you guys to know that I am attending court via zoom this morning, and this is being done while waiting for our case to be called. My boss is sitting across me, probably thinking I'm being productive as fuck, but really I'm sitting here ranking these men based off vibes.

I think it goes without saying that this is all being done for fun, nothing I am saying should be taken seriously. I truly do not care about these men in any capacity beyond their ability to drive in funky little circles.

Charles Leclerc: Sub, but he thinks he's a Dom but like it's a joke when he tries it and it just ruins the vibes.

Carlos Sainz: Dom, seems self-explanatory.

Oscar Piastri: Switch, it's always the quiet ones that surprise you.

Lando Norris: Sub, but similar to Charles he likes to think he can Dom but it's hilarious when he tries.

Max Verstappen: Sub, we've all see the clip of him meowing on stream, I feel like this one doesn't need an explanation.

Sergio Perez: I feel like he's a switch, but leans more towards dom.

Nico Hulkenberg: Subs for Kevin.

Kevin Magnussen: Doms for Nico.

Pierre Gasly: Probably dom, but like a fun dom! A cool dom! One that is down with the trends or whatever.

Esteban Ocon: I know this one is gonna surprise some folks, but I think he's a sub.

Alex Albon: SUB, LOL. Do I need to explain?

Franco Colapinto: Switch, 100%.

Logan Sargeant: Sub, because everything about this man screams sad puppy.

George Russell: Honestly? Dom.

Lewis Hamilton: Swich.

Fernando Alonso: Dom, god the vibes are screaming dom.

Lance Stroll: Sub.

Yuki Tsunoda: Hear me out, sub.

Liam Lawson: Probably a dom, but he's mean.

Zhou Guanyu: Sub.

Valtteri Bottas: Switch LOL.

Daniel Ricciardo: Sub, and he's like perfect.

Kimi Kaikkonen: DOM, SO DOM.

Sebastian Vettel: Hear me out, see the vision, dom.

Mick Schumacher: Sub.

Jenson Button: Switch.

Nico Rosberg: Sub, I think. He's a wildcard to me.

Toto Wolff: Dom, this one feels obvious.

James Vowles: Dom, this one also feels obvious.

Peter Bonnington: Probably sub, but god I would let this man dom me.

Daddy Stroll: Switch.

Fred Vasseur: Sub, and he's not proud of it.

Adrian Newey: Again, this is a wildcard, I think sub.

Helmut Marko: He makes me think of emperor Palpatine, so like, idk, probably dom?

Christian Horner: Sub, and he's also not proud of it.

#smash or pass with a twist #f1 #formula 1 #logan sargeant #lewis hamilton #max verstappen #charles leclerc #carlos sainz #toto wolff #george russell #franco colapinto #i need therapy

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maxillness · 1 year ago

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🇦🇹 || Happy Fucking New Years || T.W x rival driver!reader

Warnings: 18+, age gap, alcohol consuming, praise kink, degrading kink, Toto is called a Needy slut🤭, handjob, oral (M reviving), over stimulation, sub!toto

Wordcount: 2k

New Years. Something she wasn’t looking forward to

She had been invited to a New Year’s party with the rest of the drivers, as well as the team principals

She liked partying and drinking, but the thought of that many people made her shiver and thought about just staying at home

Of course she wanted to spend time with her fellow drivers, but she did my want to spend time with them all at the same time

She knew it was wrong, but she had come to the conclusion she only went because he was gonna be there

The rival team’s Team principal. Toto Wolff

She had only ever told her best friend and fellow driver, Lando Norris. He was the only who knew of her attraction to the older man

She was afraid to ever tell somebody, but she had to get it off her chest, and even with doubt, Lando had promised to never tell anyone, and she trusted him

She had arrived at the party with Lando and Oscar by her sides. They all went to the other drivers, sitting at the couch area in a corner

From her spot on the couch, she could see the whole room. When she spotted him, she couldn’t take her eyes off of him

Her eyes lingered on the way his hand ran trough his hair, the way his other hand had a grip around his glass, the way there formed small wrinkles at the corner of his eyes when he smiled or talked

Everything he did made her brain foggy. She stopped herself from biting her lip, choosing to bite the inside of her cheeks instead

He looked so fucking good like this. Surrounded by people, the different coloured light reflecting off of his beautiful soft skin

Lando sat down beside her, handing her a new glass with liquor “What are you looking at?” He asked, noticing she had stared into the abyss all evening

“Why does he gotta be so fucking pretty?” She asked, not answering his question

“I wouldn’t, would I? I’m not the one finding him attractive” He said, trying to ignore the fact his best friend was feeling this way about someone from her rival team

Even though they had their rivalry, she couldn’t stop her mind from picturing all kinds of inappropriate images in her hea

She would sit at a meeting, and she would imagine fucking that pretty smirk off of his face after one of the Mercedes drivers had won

She wish she could fuck him dumb. Making him forget his own name. Making him forget everything beside her and the way she would make him feel good

“Would you come back to earth, please?” Lando waves a hand in front of her face “I don’t want you to have an orgasm, not now at least” She rolled her eyes at his words, where after her eyes yet again turned to the man at the other end in the bar

“Enjoying the view?” She hadn’t realised the man she had eyes all night had come up to her

She stood by the bar, waiting for her drink. If she was any less drunk, she would have stopped her thighs from clinging together at the sound of his voice, but that wasn’t my the case

“What are you talking about?” She picked up her glass putting it to her lips, taking a short sip

“You’ve been starring at me all fucking night, Schatzi” His chest was almost pressed all the way on her back as she stared down into her glass

“You don’t know what you’re talking about. You’re drunk” She sighed, taking yet another sip of her drink

“And you’re not?” He had leaned down to talk in a deep voice, just by her ear, making blood rush straight to her core

“I didn’t say that, but you’re more than I am” She chuckled, feeling the alcohol rushing trough her blood

“Fuck, you’re hot when you have a dominating voice, did you know that?” He said, his lips dangerously close to her neck “The things your eyes do to me” He groaned, his hot breath against her neck

She turned around in the bar stool, now facing him, making him take his head a few centimetres back “What are you doing?”

“Well, if you haven’t noticed, I’m trying to fuck you” His lips were now only Millimeters away from hers

“Nobody’s stopping you”

The drive in the taxi was unbearable for Toto. Her fingernails dug into his inner thigh, just under where his cock was straining in his tight pants

He held his hand over his mouth, stopping any excess sounds from spilling out of him as she started making small circular motions on his inner thigh

They arrived at her apartment. She paid the driver and they walked toward the building. It was a rather tall building, and she did live in one of the top floors

As soon as she had pressed the floor button, she was pushed up against the wall of the elevator

He smashed their lips together, his hand behind her head so she wouldn’t bang it against the wall

The kiss was hot, messy, heated, and filled with saliva. Their bodies were pressed together, and she could feel his erection pressed against her stomach

The ding of the elevator didn’t startle Toto, it almost went unnoticed by him. It was only when she had pushed him off of her and pulled him by his wrist out of the elevator and towards the door

He interviewed their fingers as she pulled out her keys from the pocket of her jacket. She had barely closed the when she was yet again pressed up against the door

“I want you so bad, please” He mumbled, pressing his lips to hers “Please, need you”

“God, Wolff. You act all bad shit and tough, but do you know what I think?” She forced him to look down at her “You’re just a needy slut who needs to get taken care of” She smirked as he whimpered at the nickname

Her smirk faded “Isn’t that right?” He nodded at her dominating tone “Use your words”

“Fuck, yes. I’m a needy slut who needs to get taken care of” He whimpered at the way her eyes look up yet dominating at him “Please, I need you so bad”

“I can tell” She gripped his cock trough he is pants making him moan low “God” She chuckled “Such a needy slut”

She backs him up, pushing him down to sit on the couch, his shoes gone as well “Take your shirt off” He doesn’t hesitate to obey “Good boy” She caressed his cheek before taking a pillow to the floor so she could go down on her knees

Her fingers went to his belt, unbuckling it. She zipped down his zipper, and tapped his hips, indicating him to buck for her to pull both his pants and boxers down slowly

She spit into the palm of her hand and started stroking him slowly, but it was enough for him to grab her wrists, arch his back, and throw his head back on to the couch

The grip on her wrists wasn’t tight; he didn’t want her to stop, but it was more to steady home self, and to have a place to have his hands

“F-fuck, please” He bucked his hips, fucking her hand, wanting her to go faster, but it only resulted in her stoping, not taking her hand away, but stoped her motions

“No, please, I’m sorry. Please, i need it. I’m sorry” He whined and whimpered as he look down at her

“God, you sound so good when you whimper” Her words made him whimper and she stared stroking him slowly again

“Please, I need your mouth around me. Please-“ His last plead turned into a loud moan when she sped up “Fuck. Making me feel so good” He threw his head yet again back onto the couch, eyes rolling into the back of his head as his back arched off the couch

She felt him twitch in her hand “Are you gonna come, Toto? Are the needy little slut gonna come?” He didn’t want it to be true, but yes, he was already gonna come, and her words did just that

His load landed on his abdomen and the part that ran down his shaft, landed on her hand

He started whimpering and whining when she did halter or stop her actions. She was sending him into over stimulation

“Think you got a few more in for me?” She asked teasingly, kissing the inside of both his trembling thighs

He made a sound, but she didn’t pick it up “What was that, baby?” She asked soothingly

“I don’t know if I- fuck. If I can give you more” He said, trying to look down at her, but his body was trembling, making it hard for him

“Well, you have to have more in for me I won’t stop until I get at least two more” She knew she was stretching it far, but she want to see how long he could last without falling completely apart

“I can t-try” He stuttered as she lightly licked up his shaft, taking all the droplets of cum with her tongue as she did so

He turned back to loud moans as her tongue swirled around the tip of his cock, collecting the rest of his cum

“Fuck, please. I want you around me, please, I’m begging you” His hand came to tangle in her hair, but he didn’t dare to push her down

“Be patient, Toto, or you might not get it at all” He didn’t want to risk it, but he really needed her around him

“Please…” He whimpered softly, his thighs shaking, trapping her body between them

“God, you’re so pretty like this” She said “Fucked out, post-orgasm, hair sticking to your forehead, all sweaty. So fucking pretty” Her words sent him yet again over the edge, yet again shooting his load on his stomach but less this time

“Such a good boy for me. I just want the last” She said, licking the cum off of her hand “Think you can do that for me?” She looked up at him

He only nodded, unable to form any words. Her lips wrapped around his tip. A second went by before she hollowed her cheeks, his cock hitting the back of her throat, making her gag, sending vibrations all trough his body

“F-fuck. You feel so good around me” He cursed something in German as she started bobbing her head, holding onto his waist, making sure to leave marks for him to see tomorrow

She hummed around him, sending even stronger vibrations through him, making him moan loud again, his body convulsing, yet not near his third orgasm

He was still sensitive, but he took it well, better than she thought he would “Fuck, you’re taking me so good” She said, pulling off of him, beginning to stroke him again

“Come on. Come for me again, baby” Her words and a few bites to the inside of his thighs made him come for the third time

He was exhausted as she stood up. Her knees felt sore, but it would have been worse without the pillow

“Come on, baby. Let’s get you cleaned up” She pulled him off of the couch, holding him steady, helping him walk to the bathroom

He got into the tub as she opened for the water “Is the temperature okay?” She asked softly. He only nodded at her question

“Are you okay, Toto? I’m sorry” She kissed the side of his forehead “I really am”

“I’m fine” He looked up at her with the prettiest brown doe eyes she had ever seen

#smut #dom!reader #formula one #Toto Wolff #toto Wolff smut #toto wolff x reader smut #toto wolff x reader #sub!toto Wolff

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pinkfoxd0ll · 8 months ago

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🩷Pink Ribbon🩷

Summary: Bellas dads friend Toto Wolff visits the family for the summer. Bella hasn't had close relationship with her parents but Toto has been a protective figure when Bella was younger. One day, Bella and Toto spend a day together and find a connection they haven't had before.

Characters: Toto Wolff & Bella(reader)

Category: 🧁Sweet Smut

POV: Fem

Warnings: Parental figure sex, DD/Brat dynamic, big age age gap (26-51)

Dynamic: Fem Sub/Masc Dom

🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀🎀

Toto is sitting on a armchair reading a newspaper, with his glases on looking very focused. I walk to my bedroom changing myself in to a cute outfit. I walk down to the kitchen looking in the living room where Toto still sits. I go to by an upper closet trying to reach it.

"Mr. Wolff! Can you come here?", I yelled, having my back still turned.

I can hear his steps approaching. I turn my head.

"I need some help.", I looked at him up and down, stretching my arms up to shelf.

Toto walks to get next to me.

"You can't reach?", he asks.

"Yes.", I lightly giggled.

"Which of these did you try to get?"

"That one."

Toto reached his hand to the shelf and gave me the small bag.

"Thank you.", I smiled.

There. We had a small moment. We looked into each others eyes. My heart beating a bit harder than usual.

"Anything else?", Toto asked casually.

"Uh, no.", I smiled.

"Okay, let me know if you need help again.", he smiled and nodded.

"I will."

I walked outside to the garden. I laid on the grass on my stomach looking at the flowers.

Hour or so later I hear steps on the ground. Toto was walking to the gazebo. When gets to it he stands and looks at the view. I walk to him and sit down on a couch.

"The garden has grown beautifully. The trees have especially grown strong.", Toto says out loud.

I look at the same direction.

"Yeah, it has. Dad was worried about the sunflowers. Last year they were dying constantly, but we found a better place for them and now they have been very strong.", I said.

"So he finally listened?", Toto looks at me.

"Yeah.", I laughed.

Toto walked to the couch and sat down across to me.

"What have you been doing while I have been gone?", Toto asks.

"Travelling. A lot. And I did open a gallery in Madrid."

"What kind of gallery?"

"At the moment a mostly photography gallery. There are few statues but it's mainly photography focused."

"Sounds very much like "you". I remember you always liked art. Especially photography."

"You gave me a camera as a birthday present when I turned twenty.", I play with a flower in my hand.

"Oh yeah, I did! I remember you were so happy that you cried."

"It was the best present I've ever gotten. Still is."

"I'm happy that you like it."

I giggled.

We talk for a while.

Back in the house, Toto is sitting in the office. I get very strong urge. He looks very focused on his papers and computer, I doubt that he even notices me. I walk up to my bedroom, remove my clothes and have only lingerie on. I lay myself on the bed.

"Mr. Wolff! Mr. Wolff!", I yell.

"Yes?", he yelled back.

"I fell. Can you come and help me up?"

I hear steps coming closer.

"God, you can be so clumsy at ti-", he came to my room and saw me on the bed. I could see his eyes going slowly up and down.

"Why are you on your underwear?", he asks.

"For you.", I answered.

Toto walks walks closer. He sits himself next to me.

"I need to tell you something. I have felt need to tell you this for a while.", I softly told him.

Toto turns his head to me. I move myself behind him.

"I have had this feeling for a while. You have always been there for me. Made me feel safe, warm, comforting...", I continue.

"What are you saying?", Toto asks.

"I want you. I need you.", I move myself to his lap. Putting my hands on his shoulders.

"I don't know if this is a good idea.", he says.

I pout my lips and give him my best puppy eyes.

"It would disappoint your father if he'd found out."

"He won't.", I whispered in his ear.

"Please, Mr. Wolff. I'm in need. Won't you help me.", I rub my waist back and forth.

"I'm not sure.", he smirks and bites his lip.

"Please Mr. Wolff, please!", I beg.

He pulls my head head closer. And kisses me. He stops and we look at each other. And then continue to kiss. He continues to my jaw, down to my neck.

"Take off your bra.", Toto tells me.

I removed my bra. He continued to kiss to my breast. He looks at me, I nod. He puts my breast into his mouth, started sucking it and playing with my nipple with his tongue. He places his hand on my panties.

"My dear. Are you this excited already?", he whispers.

"Mhm.", I nodded.

He lightly rubs his finger against my panties. I can feel it up till my spine.

Toto lays me down on the bed. He removes my panties and spreads my legs.

"You look absolutely gorgeous.", he kisses and licks my inner thighs.

He teases me, making me more and more impatient. He finally starts playing with my clit with his tongue. Just making me wetter.

"Mr. Wolff! Yes! Just like that!", I whimpered.

His tongue feels amazing. I couldn't stop craving for more.

"Mr. Wolff, let's switch.", I asked him.

Toto lays on the bed and I get on top. I unzip his pants and take out his cock. I first lick the tip and teasing his cock with my tongue. I put his cock in my mouth. I can feel it getting harder.

"Ah yes!", he groans.

I go up and down. Making sure the cock gets hard and slippery. We both moan of pleasure.

"I need you now. Get on my lap.", Toto asks.

I get up on his lap, but instead of putting it inside. I tease his cock around my slit. But I couldn't do it for long. I craved it inside just as much he does.

I put it in and go up and down. His cock stretching my hole feels amazing. I didn't expect it to be so thick. Toto holds my breasts while bounce faster and faster.

"I didn't realize for how long and how much I have craved you.", I moan.

"This whole time, have you tried to tell me this?", Toto asks.

"Yes. But I was very shy. I was praying for a chance for us to be alone. I was worried about us possibly getting caught. I just couldn't take it anymore."

"I found you attractive too but I thought that you wouldn't be that interested in me. Especially when you were dating other people."

"None of them compare to you."

We moan and moan, as I go harder and faster. Toto raises himself up to get closer to me. I wrap my arms around his neck. We kiss and he rubs my clit.

"Cum for me, liebling. Show me how badly you wanted me.", Toto groans.

I moan louder and feel immense pressure between my thighs. We moan in sync and forget where we are. Our focus are only on each other. I feel warmth filling me inside. A feeling of euphoria hits and I can't move. Everything feels tense, but in a good way.

Toto leans on me and we hug.

"That was amazing.", I smile.

"You liked it hm?", he smiles back.

"Yes.", I bite my lip with a smile.

We lay down on the bed, I move my head to his chest. He plays with my hair.

"How much time do we have for ourselves?", Toto asks.

I look at the clock.

"Few hours.", I close my eyes.

Toto let's out a chuckle.

#f1blr #f1 fanfiction #toto wolff

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bunny-jpeg · 4 months ago

Text

toto the terror

toto wolff

tags: smut/pwp, driver!reader, spanking/punishments, team prinicpal!toto, age gap (20s/50s), teasing, dirty talk/degrading language, rough sex, mean!toto, collars, dom/sub behaviors, power dynamic, kinky

a/n: like the fic? suggest your own! really like the fic, leave a comment!

you should've known what was coming next when you saw you results of the weekend. you got p16, you were basically in last. and you boss didn't like being at the bottom of the grid. he paid you a lot of money to win, so do to so horribly was unacceptable. toto wouldn't allow this.

when you got yo your hotel room with your metaphorical tail between your legs. you saw a familiar box on your bed. made of sturdy wood with the mercedes logo painted on the top. as much as you belonged to the team.

you belonged to toto even more.

you swallowed as you opened the box. you gazed inside its padded interior. a black leather collar with a gold tag glared back at you. you expected it to be there just as you expected to be punished for the infraction of the weekend. you'd have to learn for the next race.

toto was an interesting man. he could be so stoic, but also abrasively passionate. his anger could be felt through any room if someone caught him in the wrong mood. and while the anger was something to avoid, especially in the tension of racing. there was nothing worse than the silent disappointment. there was a tension in the air of his own room as you knelt in front of him while he fastened the collar around your throat.

despite it being an act of punishment, this was also an act of trust.

"i'm sorry, sir."

"apologies won't save you now. if you were truly sorry you would've done better this weekend." his tone was flat while he tugged on the collar to make sure that it was securely on you.

you whined and toto patted your head, you tried to go for the belt around his waist but he stopped you. you looked up at him with a sad expression and he laughed.

"the puppy dog eyes won't work on me, you know that." he said sternly, "not tonight. you need to learn and i'm afraid i have been lacking in my lessons with you."

you whined when he patted your cheek with a little more force than normal. he'd never hit you with a closed fist, but he'd leave another pair of cheeks bruised. you swallowed then said, "please."

"no." he said lowly as he got you across his lap. there wasn't a stitch on you except for the collar around your throat. a symbol of toto's ownership over you. he squeezed the roundness of one of your ass cheeks and you moaned. he gave it a rough rub before he laid a smack across the skin.

your back arched as you hissed through your teeth. you held onto a pillow on the couch . your jaw tensed when he laid another smack across your skin. it made you buck against him.

"don't make me pin you down, slut. you know i will tie you up like a hog and tease you until you cry." his words were a promise as he continued to land smacks across your ass.

his hand covered a lot of surface across your skin. you hissed when three more slaps cam down. but he kept you down against him.

you weren't going anywhere toto didn't want you to go.

"you are so useless to me. useless on the track. i can't believe they allowed you get a license. you don't belong anywhere near a car or a track, my little failure of a driver." his voice was tense and it made your bottom lip wobble. he laid down more smacks across your behind. you knew it would be purple come morning.

maybe being unable to sit properly for a while would do you some good. maybe the sting of it would linger until you won another championship.

he grasped your cheek once more and the pain made your toes curl. he heard your groan and it made him chuckle. your curse words in your first language made him laugh.

"you'll behave now? you'll finally understand how much i've invested in you. you are my most expensive purchase. and i expect returns. either with your wins or your body."

you swallowed before you said meekly, "i'm sorry, sir. i won't fail you again." your hips rolled when you felt another painful smack.

when he was finished giving you your punishment, he pushed you onto the carpeted floor of the hotel room. you fumbled and whined when you got carpet burn on your knees from the impact.

"don't cry over that. i've done worse to you than a little carpet burn and you moaned." he said as he took off his branded button up and got his cock out of his slacks. he remained mostly clothed in a white undershirt in his slacks. no need for a messy girl like you to ruin his work shit. (someone had to work around here).

toto wolff was a man who loved control. while he usually kept his drivers on a loose leash, not you. he needed total control over you. he needed you on a leash that nearly choked you.

so when he kept you on the floor by the couch, your knees bruised like your ass. you felt the heat in your core. you felt the fire in your gut from the power he held over you.

he rubbed his cock up against you. he briefly teased your cunt before he sank himself into you. you tried to find support from something, but the rough carpet just hurt your fingers while your boss fucked you. "you're no good. only good with your mouth. maybe if you didn't run it so much for the press, you could actually use it for it's real purpose. getting me off. being my stress relief. you being in a car is a mercy i could take away. you're a seat warmer when you should be my bed warmer."

it made your toes curl. his words burned in your brain and you heavily panted against the rough carpet. your heart raced as he had you almost bouncing on his cock.

"you need to learn to behave, you need to learn to win. you need to be the best. if you're not the best, then you're nothing to me." he groaned.

the movements were rough and you felt the pleasure between you two. your short nails dug into the carpet, unable to grab leverage of anything. you were at the mercy of your lover.

your boss.

the movement continued and you felt all rationality leave your head. there was little left in terms of thoughts as toto made sure to push you further into the carpet. he pressed your head into the carpet. he shifted his knees to go at a quicker pace. he noticed the shake of your ass with each heavy movement. he curled over you as he hit against the right areas.

"please sir, i'll win the next one. i'll win all of them!" yur back arched. you felt the rush in your system. your head felt a buz while he remained balls deep inside of you.

"promises, promises." he grunted.

you were at your lover's mercy. you were under him and it made you core swim. you eventually pressed your cheek against the carpet, you accepted the carpet burn across your skin. you were pushed further into it with each hard thrust.

you whined, "i mean it! i'll make you proud!" your bottom lip wobbled more as he continued to roughly fuck you.

he shook his head and clicked his tongue, "i hear the words, but i've yet to see the action, you know i'm a man of results."

you knew that, you knew that painfully well. toto expected the best out of you. that was why he collared and spanked you. he said things that often made you ears burn

the pace was rapid and rough. he didn't stagger despite his age. he didn't pull his cock fully out, he made sure that every inch was shoved inside of you. that you were familiar with him, that you could taste him in the back of your throat due to how hard he was fucking you.

"you feel so good. taking my cock is more nature to you than driving. maybe it's time for a new career path."

"no, please sir! i want to drive I want to win it all! i want to be your champion!" your mouth hung open for a moment as you felt the inferno in your guy.

toto muttered something in german and you felt the pleasure flood your head and with a few more thrusts, you finished around him. you clawed at the carpet and arched your back. your noises were tight as you came.

toto muttered something against your heated flesh as he continued. he fucked you roughly against the carpet, he left you needy. he left you wanting more. you were greedy for him. he let himself fully take you, he heated noises grew before he slammed his cock as deep as it would go as he finished inside of you.

you panted heavily as you tried to come back to reality. toto came out and admired his work as he got his sticky cock back into his slacks. your bruised behind with cum dripped out of you achy cunt. he rubbed you behind and you whimpered.

"now, you'll be good, right? next week will be better?"

you croaked, "yes, sir."

"you've done it! first place yours!" you heard toto's voice over the radio. you cheered as you drove the car back to the garage. you beyond happy, this put you back in the league to get the wdc.

"let's go! let's go!" you cheered.

"careful now." toto said, "remember the rules. don't want community service after your win!"

you laughed, "of course, sir, of course!" you couldn't contain yourself. you believed this was the start of a winning streak. toto gave you a good luck charm before the race. his cum inside of your slick pussy after he fucked you in the driver's room. you believed that your boss' training would make you a true winner. <3

#bunny writes #reader insert #formula 1 #formula one imagine #formula one smut #formula one fanfiction #f1 smut #f1 x reader #torger toto wolff #toto wolff smut #toto wolff x reader #toto wolff fanfiction #toto wolff #toto wolff fanfic

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h-c-u · 2 years ago

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Was it ever really love?

Summary: You break up with your fiancé, and right after you throw your engagement ring at him, you go to Toto's room...

Pairing: Toto Wolff x fem!reader

W/C: 6.3k

Rating: +18, age gap, size kink, dirty talk, light dom/sub, oral sex (fem receiving), squirting, edging, choking, drooling, biting, breeding kink

TWs: dubious consent in the end (the reader is so consensually fucked out that TECHNICALLY she's not in the right state to agree to anything)

A/N: I mean... So that happened. Exactly what's in the rating. You are responsible for the media you consume, so if you're not into it - please scroll away :) Oh yeah, and it's like 90% smut.

Masterlist | List of tags

- Isn't it enough that I am telling you that I've never cheated on you!? - you were sure everyone in neighboring rooms and the corridor heard what you were fighting about.

- Apparently, it's not! How can I believe you if you're always with him!? You always run to him to sign something, pass the documents, and make sure he remembers about the meetings! For fucks sake, you do that even in the middle of the night, when you're in bed with me!

- Yes, BECAUSE THAT'S MY FUCKING JOB! IT'S LITERALLY IN THE DESCRIPTION BECAUSE I'M HIS FUCKING ASSISTANT!!! - you couldn't help raising your voice, because it definitely wasn't the first time you were fighting about it.

- OH, AND YOU'RE TELLING ME THAT YOU'RE THE ONE ASSISTANT NOT FUCKING THEIR BOSS!?!? - this conversation wasn't going anywhere, but neither of you was going to stop now.

- YES!!! THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I AM TELLING YOU!!! - the stress of another lost race was getting to the both of you, and it was just too much. - Wait. Is that what it's all about!? You don't believe me, BECAUSE YOU'RE FUCKING YOUR OWN ASSISTANT!?!? - it suddenly hit you, and you started to connect dots in your head quicker than Sherlock Holmes. - Oh my fucking god, you are... - you had to sit down not to fall over.

- What gave you that idea? - he asked much quieter but equally angry.

- And you're not even denying it... How the fuck I could have been so fucking blind. Maybe you're right, maybe I was spending too much with him to notice that you are SUCH A FUCKING BASTARD. YOU MOTHERFUCKER!!! YOU CHOSE THE FUCKING DATE! - you stood up again and with a speed and intensity of a tornado, you started throwing your things in your bag. - YOU CHOSE THE FUCKING VENUE!!! – fortunately, you didn't have much to pack, since it was supposed to be just a weekend trip. - YOU STARTED MAKING A GUEST LIST!!! - you moved to the bathroom to get your things from there, and he didn't even try to stop you. - ALL THAT, WHILE YOU WERE FUCKING SOPHIE!?!? - he still hasn't denied that, and that was all you needed. - You know what...? - you closed the zipper of your bag with such vigor that you almost broke it. - We're fucking over, I'm done. And just so we're fucking clear - I never slept with him. Not even fucking once, you motherfucker. - it wasn't the best of your insults, but you no longer cared. You took off your engagement ring and threw it at him. - Here, give it to Sophie, I bet she'll love it since she took you second hand. - he didn't even try to stop you when you took your things and left. You were still fuming, and you honestly didn't know what you were supposed to do.

If anyone looked at you, they would be hit with a ricochet, and that wouldn't be good for anyone if you wanted to get another room in this hotel. And then it hit you. You knew exactly what you were going to do.

You marched down the corridor to the suite you were in so many times and with determination on your face, you knocked at the door. It was already late, but you knew he wouldn't be sleeping just yet, so you weren't afraid about waking him up.

- Y/n..? What do you need? - the door finally opened, and you had to look up to look Toto in the eyes.

- Funny you should ask. I need you to fuck the anger and frustration out of me. - you surprised not only him but also yourself with your boldness.

- I'm sorry, what? What about...? - he was clearly meant to ask about your now ex-fiancé, but you cut him off.

- We just broke up. - you motioned to the bag hanging currently on your arm. - So? Are you going to do it, or will I have to find someone else? - the adrenaline from the fight was still running high in your veins, that's why your voice wasn't shaking.

Instead of responding, your boss grabbed the strap of your bag and used it to pull you closer. You couldn't help but smile when you kicked the doors closed and he pushed you against it. You didn't even notice that the bag landed on the floor because he was already kissing you hungrily as his life depended on it, and you gave in... Well, at least for now.

His arms caged you against the door, which with his much taller figure meant that there was no way you could get away without him allowing you to do so. While the kiss was frantic and impatient, his other moves were much more calculated, because he put his knee in between your thighs, and started rubbing your crotch through the thick material of your jeans, but even that was enough to make you moan into his mouth, which only made him smile.

- If I knew you were such a horny pretty little thing, I would have done that much sooner... - he growled, bit your lower lip, and pulled on it, and you had no choice but to follow. And you did…

You kicked off the shoes off your feet and grabbed the front of his shirt, stopping him from moving further toward the bedroom, and while your bottom lip, was still locked in between his teeth, you aggressively sucked and bit his top lip, while reaching for his hands and putting them under your ass. You didn't have to say anything more, because he lifted you exactly when you jumped and locked your legs around his hips, which also meant that your faces were on a similar level now and he no longer had to crook his neck at the uncomfortable angle just to kiss you.

While he was walking in the direction of the bedroom, you started to unbutton your Mercedes-branded shirt, revealing a soft, see-through white bra, which left very little to the imagination. It didn't have any complicated lace pattern, but as soon as Toto saw it, he stopped kissing you and with his teeth grabbed one strap and pulled it down, and then the other, making it easier for you to take it off completely, but you knew he did that just to indulge himself because he didn't break the eye contact even for a moment and gave you a cheeky smile right after.

When the top part of your wardrobe landed somewhere on the floor, you finally moved to his. Due to the position of your hips, you couldn't unbutton it all the way, but he was already ahead of you. Sure, he could put you down, but the other option seemed much more fun, so he tossed you a bit higher into the air and moved his left arm, so now your ass was resting against his forearm, while his right was snaking under the white material. You pulled the shirt up just as his hand was on its way back to your butt cheeks. You maneuvered the material around his head and down his right arm, so he could take it off completely, and when he did, you were finally able to feel his hot skin clashing against yours. You could almost hear the blood rushing through your veins when you rubbed your whole torso against his. which got you a low growl deep from his chest.

You rested one hand on his shoulder, while the other found its way to the back of his neck, and you pulled him closer, catching his lips in yours. It was scarily easy to lose yourself in him, but right now you were far beyond caring and there was no time or space for any feelings between you two right now.

Only a few seconds passed since you kicked the doors closed, yet somehow it felt like a small eternity filled with so many sensations... The taste of his tongue on yours... His natural scent filling your nostrils and making you lightheaded... His hot skin under your fingers and against our body... His hands, kneading your ass while gently moving you up and down, forcing you to grind against him... His rough kisses leaving your lips puffed and oversensitive... It was like he knew exactly what you needed and was giving it to you without any questions.

- Be a good girl and unbutton your jeans... - he whispered in between the kisses, and you happily obliged, sliding your hands over his naked torso, until you got to the band of your trousers and undid both the button and the zipper. He slowly moved first one hand under the material and then the other, so there was another point of skin-to-skin contact, and you realized you were finally in his bedroom with his legs touching the edge of the bed.

He gently put you on the sheets; the tenderness in this move was contrasting so much with everything both of you were doing up to this point, which surprised you a bit. Especially when he slowly started pulling your pants and underwear down, kissing, licking, and biting every new patch of skin that showed up on your right leg, and it somehow turned you on even more. And when you were completely naked in front of him, he went right back up, marking every part of your other leg, until he stopped on the inside of your thigh, so close to your core.

- Are you sure you want this...? - he asked quietly, giving you one last chance to back out. And you knew that if you chose to do that, he would have never mentioned whatever just happened. But you not only wanted it… You needed it. You needed to get rid of all emotions, to forget, to throw away all the stress and anger currently bubbling under your skin.

- Yes, I am sure... And don't hold back, I need to feel anything but emotions. - you added, although based on his actions leading to this moment, you suspected you didn't need to.

- Your wish is my command... - you couldn't help but smile at the sight of the devilish grin that sprawled on his lips, but instead of being rough and messy, like he was just a few minutes ago, he started gently licking your slick from the outside part of your folds... You could feel the scratch of his unshaven five-o-clock shadow on the inside of your thigh and his warm breath just where you wished his tongue was, but he was merciless and meticulous as if he wanted to savor every little part of you. And with every lick and every gentle suck, you were getting more and more sensitive, so when he finally dove in, you were already panting, grasping the sheets in your hands, and you simply couldn't stop squirming and bucking your hips, even when he bit the inside of your thigh as a warning.

So instead of following your unpredictable moves, he wrapped his arms around your thighs in an iron grip so you weren't able to move your hips even by an inch... And he went right back down, pulling you flush against his mouth and keeping you there, no matter how hard you tried to react, to move even closer, or away from the sudden overstimulation. His tongue was circling around that sensitive bud, focusing a little bit more on the place just above it and it made your vision go white.

- Ffffuck... Just like that... Don't stop, don't stop, don't stop, don't stop, don't stop... - and he definitely didn't. He also didn't slow down or sped up, because he was experienced enough to realize that when a woman was telling him not to stop, it didn't mean to change anything, so he did just that until your whole body curled up. You squeezed his head with your thighs and grasped his hair with your hands so hard, that it actually hurt, but even then he didn't stop completely, licking your juices while you were trying to catch your breath, and when he felt your body relaxed in his arms, he picked up the tempo again, determined to make you forget everything but his name.

The sounds his tongue made in between your soaked folds were lewd and obscene, but you didn't have time to focus on any of that, because you could feel the second wave approaching much quicker than the first one. This time you looked down, and your heart skipped a beat when you saw his piercing dark eyes drilling into your soul with such intensity... You realized you won't be able to walk straight after the things he'll do to you, and just the thought of it was enough to push you over the peak and you couldn't help but to break the eye contact, because your eyes rolled back...

You could feel the electricity running through your body until it reached every single nerve ending, sending you into such an overstimulated state, that even the slightest touch hurt. His arms locked around your hips felt as if they were made of metal, his tongue was made of fire, his 5 o'clock shadow became rough sandpaper, the sheets under your back were made out of tiny spikes, the air in your lungs felt like steam and yet... He didn't stop. And what was more important - you didn't tell him to stop... You wanted him to pull you to the top and push you over it again, and you knew he was more than capable of doing so. And he did just that... Only this time you almost blacked out from the intensity of it, but you could still feel the release of the accumulated pressure deep inside you. You didn't process why, but you felt him chuckling against your skin, and only then you realized that he was actually swallowing your release. Which could only mean...

You almost immediately hid your face in your hands from embarrassment... It was supposed to be a quick one-night stand with your boss, an act of revenge towards your ex-fiancé. But here you were. In his bed. Squirting.

Toto finally released his grip on your hips, so you could move again, but before you were able to do anything, you felt the weight shifting on the mattress, and you could tell he was crawling up.

- Such a tasty little pussy you have there... You've been holding out on me, dear. - he said in a voice deeper than you've ever heard him use, while slowly moving your hands from your face above your head, where he held them both in only one of his, while the other found its way under your chin and forced you to look at him. - Here, see for yourself... - he growled and leaned down to kiss you. Technically you could turn your head away, and tell him to stop, but after coming three times in a row, most of your inhibitions went out of the window.

You could taste yourself on his tongue... And honestly - you were pleasantly surprised. It was a bit sour, but not overwhelmingly so, with a hint of actual sweetness. You didn't know what you were expecting, but it wasn't this. And even though the taste quickly faded away from both of your mouths, you couldn't stop kissing him, while his free hand slowly traveled down your body, taking a short stop to gently squeeze your nipples, but when you bucked away from his touch there, he stopped and pulled slightly away so he could look at you, his eyes instantly full of familiar softness.

- Are you in pain? Tell me. - he demanded, and you wanted to hide your face again, but it would be hard at the moment. He didn't know you well enough to know what your boundaries were, and he didn't want to assume anything.

- I am not in pain... - you whispered. - Well, not like that. I'm fine, I promise. It's just... They're really fucking sensitive when... - you could feel your cheeks heating up.

- When...? - he urged you to finish that sentence.

- When I'm ovulating. So, if we could skip touching them, I'd be grateful. - you wanted to end this conversation as quickly as possible, but his devilish grin told you that he already had a plan.

- No touching it is... - he echoed. - At least for now... And tell me if anything I'm going to do will be too much. - you nodded, and as soon as you did, he moved a bit lower, so his face was lined up with your breasts. He very gently blew on one of your nipples, the cold air making it slowly tense and rise, which made you blush. No one ever showed you this kind of attention, so it was completely new.

You couldn't take your eyes off your boss, who was currently letting his saliva drop from his mouth directly onto your nipple, and as soon as it touched your skin, you felt the soothing coldness, which made you rapidly suck a substantial amount of air through your nose. Just as you did that, he gently blew on your wet skin again, and you couldn't stop a soft moan that escaped your mouth.

He continued doing that to your breasts until both were covered in a cold, slick mess, and you were squirming under him, because it just felt so good... You knew it shouldn't be, but somehow, he found a way to make it hot.

- I am going to touch now, but as soon as you tell me to stop, I will. Do you understand? - he asked, and you nodded enthusiastically, hands still above your head in his iron grip. He started on the outside of your breasts, gathering what was left of his saliva, and the contrast between your cold skin and his hot tongue made you arch your back, pushing everything closer to him, in search of that sensation again.

He was using just his tongue and his lips, making sure not to accidentally scratch your skin with his cheeks or chin currently covered in a rough stubble, since you've said you were sensitive to the point of pain. Your body was asking for more in such a pretty way that he couldn't say no, so he tested the waters and very gently run his tongue directly over your nipple, and when he heard the loud, obscene moan that left your lungs... It went straight to his cock. But tonight, wasn't about him... It was all about you. And he wanted to spend time getting to know your body better; to see how it reacted to his touch, where to push, press, where to pull, and what to do to get a reaction out of you.

You didn't know that, but he thought about having you for so long... All the long evenings together, you always being so close, the white branded shirt hugging your every feature so nicely... How could he not? There were times when his fist was closed around his cock as soon as you left the room, your subtle scent still present in the air, and he honesty couldn't count how many times he thought about you in the morning, under the shower, in the garage, in his office... So many places to fuck you, but you were unavailable… A forbidden fruit hanging so low, that he could practically taste it... But you were happily in love, and even though he knew he could make you much happier than that idiot, he didn't dare to do anything. Until you fell from the tree right onto his lap, and you were all his to take, to mark, to...

He let out a low growl to stop his thoughts from galloping where they shouldn't, instead focusing on your beautiful moans while he very gently sucked on your nipples, blowing on them from time to time to soothe the pain with coldness, and never spending too much time just on one... After all - he didn't want to hurt you, just to test your boundaries. And by your reaction, he could tell that he was far away from breaking you, so he slowly moved his hand down and gently rubbed your overstimulated clit, making your back arch into his touch.

You were relaxed enough from the previous orgasms, that he could start stretching you with not one finger, but with two, dividing his attention equally between your breasts and filling you in search for this sweet spot on your front wall, and when he found it... Music to his ears...

He would have never suspected that you would be so vocal, but here you were, moaning, begging, pleading, screaming for more, and he just couldn't refuse, so he added the third finger, filling you up more. There were tears streaming down your cheeks, leaving behind light streaks of mascara that was supposed to be waterproof. Gentle pain was mixing with extreme pleasure, his soft tongue and his rough fingers, his hot body and cool air... All the extremes were colliding with you in the exact center of it all. You were ready to fall apart, just to be built up again, and as if Toto was in your head, he began to put more pressure on your clit with his thumb, and that was enough to pull another orgasm from you, and you suddenly found yourself sitting and tightly holding his head against your chest, with your face in his hair. You didn't register when exactly he let go of your wrists, but you were finally free to touch him, to feel him, and you took full advantage of that, letting your hands run over his back.

- Fuck you're good... - he didn't say anything, the smirk on his face telling you everything you needed to know, and you shook your head with disbelief because you couldn't believe the cockiness. He knew he was a confident man, but this was different... - Thank you for that... I should... - you started, but the fingers that were still inside you started slowly moving again, making a beaconing gesture against your wall, and you inhaled sharply once again.

- Oh, darling... I'm just getting started... Have you honestly thought that I will just eat you out, stick a few fingers in your pussy, and that will be it...? - he teased you, playing just the right chords on your body. - Now that I finally had you, tasted you... I'm not letting you go so easily. - if his thumb wasn't putting constant pressure on your clit and his long fingers weren't filling and stretching you so nicely, maybe you would have been able to form coherent thoughts and say something. - And it would be a shame if your pretty little cunt missed out on something else stretching it and filling you to the brim, hmmm...? - you dug your nails in his shoulders because that was all you were able to do. He was learning your body so quickly and skillfully applying that knowledge in practice.

You were a perfect mess... Panting, too exhausted to even moan, and he hasn't even properly fucked you yet. Your hair was sticking to your face, and your whole body was covered with a thin layer of sweat, which was supposed to cool you down, but the fire he lit inside you was too strong, too hot, too overwhelming... It engulfed you whole, and there was no coming back; not when you knew how he could treat you... Just before he made you cum for the fourth time, he stopped, and the needy cry that left your lips was music to his ears. It was right then and there that you realized there was no chance that you wouldn't be back for more. And he was more than willing to give you everything you needed...

- Toto... Please... - you whispered against his neck, your hands holding to his body for dear life, so desperate for him to finish what he just started, but the devilish grin on his face told you that he had other plans. He gave your body a moment co calm down just enough so his next touch wouldn't push you over the edge again, and he started to tease you once more, this time purposefully missing that sweet spot on your front wall, while his fingers were still filling you ups so nicely, the burn of stretch almost completely non-existent. His thumb was grazing your clit from time to time, just enough to keep you on the brink of orgasm, but not enough to give you the release you so desperately wanted. And he kept you in that state for so long, that all the thoughts slowly started to disappear from your head, leaving behind only flaming heat and want.

- Oh, look at you... Such a desperate little slut and just for me... I bet he never got you to that state, didn't he...? - you could only shake your head, his words barely reaching you. – You’re so cock starved that you would let me do anything with you, just to have me inside you, wouldn’t you...? - you nodded enthusiastically and tried to reach down to unbuckle his belt, but he swatted your hands away. - Tell me first... - you weren't in a state to make any decisions... When your friends told you that they sometimes felt like a feral animal in heat, you thought it was just a figure of speech, but here you were... So overstimulated yet so filled with a specific need that your thoughts weren't your own; all that mattered was getting filled. - Would you let me cum inside of you...? Fill you up so much you would be leaking for days...? - you had no control over your nodding head, but everything he was saying sounded amazing. - Put a baby in you, mark you in every way possible so everyone everywhere will know that such a perfect little cunt belongs to me? - you weren't sure if you even stopped nodding in between questions when he was peppering your neck with soft kisses that felt like butterflies made out of fire, and you could have sworn that every little kiss left behind a bright red mark, but that wasn't possible... was it...? - You truly don't know what I'm talking about, don't you...? - his devilish smirk only made you giggle. - Oh baby, we're gonna have so much fun... - he growled and finally got his fingers out of you, brought them to your mouth and you started to suck on them eagerly, chasing that newly familiar taste, while he undid his trousers with one hand and freed his cock, but you were too focused on the fingers in your mouth to even realize what just happened.

Only when you felt something smooth running slowly in between your folds, you realized that you were finally about to get what you needed. You gently bit his fingers from excitement, because you had no other way to release all the emotions bubbling under your skin, and as soon as you did that, he took the fingers out of your mouth and roughly grabbed your jaw to the point of pain. He forced you to look him in the eyes while he was slowly entering you, with your lips parted in the shape of a perfect "o".

Even though you were drenched, and he took his sweet time preparing you, there was still some pain. Not enough for you to ask him to stop, not in the state you were in, but enough for you to need a moment to adjust, which he seemed to understand because instead of moving, he leaned and placed a soft kiss on your lips, such a contrast to the words he said just a couple of minutes ago.

You wanted nothing more than to grind against him, but being pinned down under him made that difficult, although he seemed to read your thoughts, because his hand slipped down your body until it reached your knee, brought it up, and pinned it to the mattress, opening you up even more, making the burn a bit more manageable. And then he slowly started to pull out... At first, there was still that uncomfortable feeling, but as soon as the head of his cock run over that sweet spot on your front wall, your whole body twitched.

- There it is... There is my greedy little slut... - he whispered with a satisfied smile on his face. If you were able to think, you would probably wonder how the hell he managed to stay so composed while you were a leaking mess with nothing behind your eyes, but all you managed to do was moan when he entered you again, slowly picking up the pace, and moving his eyes down. - You're taking me so well, darling... Your pussy looks so beautiful all stretched out around my cock, I really wish you could see it in all its glory... - his words were entering your brain with one ear and almost immediately leaving with the other, but that didn't matter... What mattered was the fact that you were so close you could almost taste it, and every time he dragged his head in and out, he was getting you closer and closer. - One day I'm gonna fuck you in front of a mirror just so you could see up close how perfect your cunt looks with me inside you, but for now... - he moved his hand from your jaw to your hand and brought it to your abdomen, covering it with his own there. At first, you weren't sure why he did that, but then you felt it... Your skin was bulging and stretching every time he entered you; you could feel the outline of his cock and now you regretted you haven’t seen it before he started fucking you.

And then he caught your gaze, and put more pressure on your hand, and by extension - himself and this simple thing were enough to send you rushing in the arms of another release, while he was holding your hand in one place with an iron grip. He didn't even slow down when you squirted again, wetting the bedding and his trousers with your release, he just pushed and pushed, and pushed, until you had nothing else to give, and yet he still managed to take even more.

He changed the positions a little bit, wrapping his arms under your shoulders to find more leverage, and started hammering into you at a brutal pace, while you were still high on your last orgasm, and you weren't even able to form even a simple "please". With your walls still spasming around him, it didn't take him long to finish, and when he did, he pushed deep into you, holding you in an iron grip, so there was no chance you could escape even if you wanted to. He harshly bit the place where your shoulder met your neck, leaving behind a mark that would definitely bruise soon, and just as he did that, you could actually feel his warm cum spraying against your wall, which ticked just a little, but that was the last thing on your mind.

He was still panting when you moved your hand to his neck and pulled him into a deep kiss. No words needed...

Eventually, he turned around, pulling you on top of him, careful not to slip out of you... His arms were wrapped tightly around you, keeping you in place, while your legs were spread around his hips.

Slowly but surely, your brain started to become your own again… You placed your hands under your chin and started thinking about the consequences of what just happened.

- Toto...? - you eventually said, your voice deep, raspy, and almost broken from all the moaning, screaming, and crying.

- Hmmm? - he asked, not even looking at you, but his thumbs started gently caressing your skin.

- Do you really want a kid? - he raised his head and looked at you with his eyes barely open.

- Not just any kid... - he replied. - I want you to bring our child into this world. And I don't want to stop just on one... - he smirked, and you smiled in reply. He knew that about a year ago you tried to get pregnant with your fiancé, and how excited you were to be a mum. A few times he was the one to actually drive you to your appointments, but even though everything was ok with you, you never managed to get pregnant with your now ex, which - from today's perspective - was more than fine.

- Then we better make sure it will take... - you knew this was crazy, but you actively chose not to think about it too much, which wasn't that hard with Toto's hands gently turning you around, switching your position and moving both of you from the wet patch of your doing, so both of you were on your side with your back pressed tightly against his torso. He finally kicked his damp pants off completely, so both of you were naked.

Even before he started slowly grinding against you, he was already growing inside you, which was a sensation you’d never felt before. You could feel your juices mixed with his release slowly dripping out of you and around him, but he did his best to fuck it right back into you. His left hand was on your abdomen, so he could feel himself through your skin, and he gently wrapped his right around your neck, putting a small amount of pressure. Not enough to cut either air or blood supply, but enough so you could be always aware of its heavy weight there.

This time he moved much slower, savoring every feeling, and focusing more on himself than on you, but you honestly didn't mind. Even though your thoughts were much more coherent there were still stumbling in that pleasant fog filling your mind. You moved your hands to cover his because you needed to hold onto something, and it seemed like the most logical option to not let go of reality because everything felt like a perfect dream. His moves were hitting all the right spots, forcing the air out of your lungs, the warmth of his breath pleasantly hugged your neck, where he put his head, while your own was currently resting on his shoulder, your lips so close to each other, that one turn from either of you would be enough for a kiss.

His movements were sloppy and irregular… You weren't able to predict when his hips snap again and the tip of his cock would grind against your g-spot, so you couldn't prepare for it and all you could do was react to whatever he was doing to you. This time both of you were much quieter... No loud moans, no screams, no desperate cries, it was much more... intimate - with barely audible whimpers, deep breaths, and unspoken pleads and promises.

It took him a while to widen his movements so more of him was leaving your body, which made you hook your feet behind his calf in involuntary reaction because you honestly didn't know what you wanted or needed to do. You just didn't want this moment to stop...

You finally turned your head and caught his lips in a messy kiss, while his movements quickened, and his fingers put more pressure on both your abdomen and the artery in your neck, slowly restricting the oxygen supply to your brain, making it even harder to think, but in the end... wasn't it exactly what you asked for...?

You weren't sure if he was able to manipulate your body to that degree or control his own so well, but he squeezed your throat harder and pushed on your lower abdomen at the same time he reached his peak, so the two of you came in the exact same time. As soon as you felt your walls spasming around him, he released the grip he had on your throat, allowing a fresh dose of oxygen to flood your brain, making your orgasm much stronger. You felt the muscles in your legs tense up, and your hips pushed back, taking his cock even deeper. Your back so hard, that he actually had to use his muscles to hold you in place...

And then you collapsed in his arms while he held you flush against his body, gently rubbing your abdomen with his fingers, like he was trying to ascertain if he was able to already get you pregnant. Logically he knew it wasn't possible to tell that fast, but it didn't stop him from imagining a new life already growing inside you, the mere thought of it making his cock twitch.

When you finally came down from cloud nine, you reached back and put your hand on his neck and pulled him into a sloppy kiss, trying to turn around, but he didn't let you, because he didn't want to risk even a drop of his cum leaking out of you.

- You did so well... - he whispered straight into your ear. - Your pussy took me so perfectly that nothing in the world could compare, and I'm never letting you go... From now on - you're mine. Do you understand? - the growl in his voice should scare you because even so fucked out you could tell that there was something dangerous behind it, but somehow... His claim on you made you feel... safe. So instead, you smiled and nodded in reply, and he started to leave deep red hickeys anywhere his mouth could reach in that position.

Your whole life had just changed...

And you couldn't help but love it.

A/N 2: Please don’t feel obligated/pressured to reblog, because I write mostly for myself. A comment would be appreciated though :)

Love,

#my writing #Toto Wolff fanfiction #Toto Wolff smut #Toto Wolff x reader #🖤#🐇#🔇#🥪#💋#⛔#😛#🎤#📏#🔥

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totothewolff · 7 months ago

Note

(About that toto fic) I don’t remember much but I think it was a one shot and he was on the phone in his office and reader undoes his belt without using her hands?

Could it be this one?

If it is, a massive thank you to Chris at the Wolff Pack Discord Server. She helped me find it 😭

#fan mail #fan service #txt post #txt

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f1 · 2 years ago

Text

Mercedes dismiss Verstappens criticism of Russell: He defended well | 2023 Azerbaijan Grand Prix

Max Verstappen’s vehement criticism of George Russell’s driving following the collision between the pair in yesterday’s sprint race left Mercedes’ team principal unmoved. Russell was trying to pass Verstappen on the inside of turn two when the pair made contact while disputing third place on the opening lap of yesterday’s encounter. Although Russell claimed the place, Verstappen was able to overtake him after the race restarted. The collision infuriated Verstappen, who confronted his rival after the race and called him a “dickhead”. However Mercedes team principal Toto Wolff said Russell “defended well” and Verstappen had put himself in a vulnerable position. “I think it’s dangerous to overtake from the outside because you could either end up in the run-off or you can end up in the wall,” he said in response to a question from RaceFans. “Or you can have somebody on the inside that is weak and gives you all the place in the world. “But on the inside, it’s quite an angle you need to achieve. And if you try to turn around there tightly, you’re going to lose out on the next straight.” However Wolff said he understood why Verstappen was angry afterwards. “That’s a race situation that is, you’re trying the outside, that’s never going to be an easy position. They collided, he had a big hole in the car and that’s certainly sub-optimal for your race. It’s absolutely understandable that he’s upset. “On the other side, George defended the position, and that’s also clear that they’re going to do that. So it’s not the first time, I guess, they had this situation between each other.” Wolff suspects Verstappen’s frustration was partly a result of his team mate winning the race. “They are all upset when they lose,” he said. “If your team mate [is] winning and you finish third and you haven’t got performance in the car because you have a big hole, absolutely you’re upset. “Each of them vents that differently. As long as you’re authentic, that’s good and Max is quite outspoken. Probably forgets about it one hour later. That’s okay.” Bringing the F1 news from the source RaceFans strives to bring its readers news directly from the key players in Formula 1. We are able to do this thanks in part to the generous backing of our RaceFans Supporters. By contributing £1 per month or £12 per year (or the equivalent in other currencies) you can help cover the costs involved in producing original journalism: Travelling, writing, creating, hosting, contacting and developing. We have been proudly supported by our readers for over 10 years. If you enjoy our independent coverage, please consider becoming a RaceFans Supporter today. As a bonus, all our Supporters can also browse the site ad-free. Sign up or find out more via the links below: Advert | Become a RaceFans supporter and go ad-free 2023 Azerbaijan Grand Prix Browse all 2023 Azerbaijan Grand Prix articles via RaceFans - Independent Motorsport Coverage https://www.racefans.net/

#F1 #Mercedes dismiss Verstappen’s criticism of Russell: “He defended well” | 2023 Azerbaijan Grand Prix #Formula 1

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tommydarlings · 2 years ago

Text

Boys? Men! | t.w

pairing: dom!toto x sub!reader

warnings: smut, chocking, blindfolding, inappropriate usage of a tie, spitting, ruined orgasm

w/c: 3k

summary: Dating Toto Wolff right after you broke up with Mick Schumacher is something you can definitely argue about, but you just realised that older man do it way better, especially jealous old man that are rather possessive over what's their's.

check this out: my masterlist <3 // my ko-fi to support me! <3 // my PayPal to support me! <3 // my Patreon to become a member! (get access to +45 works) <3 // Save a Life carrd made by me! <3

Honestly, you didn’t even wanted to put that black little dress on and drive in that old timer Mercedes with your boyfriend toto to this 'super important' event that he had to attend.

But since you’re his lovely girlfriend, you’ve decided to join your hardworking boyfriend.

And you definitely didn’t regret your choice as soon as you saw Michael Schumacher’s golden retriever son, mick.

You and mick had a tiny bit of… history. You’ve met each other through formula one — since you are actually a pretty well known photographer in the industry — got pretty close friends, hooked up multiple times, kind of acted like you were a couple but never put an actual label on it and then decided that staying normal friends would be the best option.

And none of you cared about the fact that the two of you got some history… not until you started dating his boss — right before he joined Mercedes—, Toto Wolff.

Was it maybe a tiny bit bold? Yes. Did you care what others had to say about it? No, not one bit. You didn’t even think about it that much.

But what you definitely do think about is walking up to mick now and starting a harmless conversation with him, tilting your head to the side before you set your champagne glass down and leaned into Toto’s touch,

“I'm gonna be right back, darling.” You mumbled into his ear after he bend down to hear you better.

He briefly stopped taking with some random, old dude you’ve never seen before, putting his attention onto you now. “Where are you going, Schatzi?” He asked you, furrowing his brows.

You cleared your throat, “I-I’m just gonna have a quick chat with somebody.” You replied as you looked up at him.

Toto clenched his jaw before he quickly threw his gaze in the big room, eyes scanning the place before they landed on mick on the other side off the room, making his lips turn upwards into a very tiny smirk before he looked down at your figure again, “Alright honey.” Briefly bending down to give you a quick peck before he turned around again and continued his conversation.

You gulped before you made your way over to mick, squeezing through a few people before you finally reached him, smiling at him as soon as he noticed you.

“Y/n, hey!,” mick started as he went in for a big hug, “What are you doing here? Supporting your man?” You nodded at his question, briefly checking him in that neat black and white suit that he’s wearing out before you put your eyes onto his face again.

“Yep, gotta be supportive, right?” You chuckled, slowly making your way over to him and leaned your back against the wall right next to his taller figure, turning your head to look at him.

“You’re here alone?” You asked him curiously.

He sighed as he put his hands into the pockets of his black slacks, “Why would you care?”

His answer suprised you a bit. You knew that the break up was mutual but you also knew that in the end it was always mick how wanted an 'us' more that you did. You gulped again,

“I don’t, I’m just curious mick.”

He briefly shook his head, “Yeah, s-sorry,” he whispered.

You looked up at him, “it’s okay,” you answered.

You removed your gaze from mick and looked across the room to put your eyes on your tall boyfriend standing at the other side of the room, still chatting with that random guy.

Mick briefly grinned before he cleared his throat, “I mean, as long as you love him, everything’s good, right?” He turned to face you again, seeing your grin now, desperately trying to hold a giggle in.

Your ex tilted his head to the side, “what’s so funny?”

Then you just shook your head before you started singing your's and mick's favourite song that you’ve danced to a dozen of times when the two of you were still together.

“As long as you love me,” you suddenly started imitating the backstreet boys's iconic song.

Mick chuckled at your obviously awful attempt to sing the song, “Who you are,” he continued.

“Where you’re from.”

“As looooooong as you loooooooove meereeeeeee.” He dragged out the o's in a rather loud manner, making you lean into his side and laugh into his chest as his head fell on top of yours, both of you squeezing your eyes shut as you just unstoppably laughed at your extremely bad singing voices.

But then, as soon as you opened your eyes, you were only able to see your boyfriend, Toto, spitting daggers your way, tightly holding his champagne glass before you removed your body from mick's warmth again.

You gulped before you looked up at the blond man, “I’m gonna go back to toto again, was very nice to see you tho, mick!” You told him as you slowly made your way over to your visibly angry looking boyfriend.

He nodded and smiled at you, “yep, no problem! See you, y/n!” He kindly answered before you turned around and went to the boss of your ex boyfriend, eyes only staring at the floor.

Toto cleared his throat as soon as you stood in front of him, silently forcing you to look up at him. You briefly bit your lip before you raised your head and looked at him.

“And? How was your little chat with your dear ex boyfriend?” He asked you in a rather mad tone. You rolled your eyes at his tone, making him quickly get a hold of your upper arm, pulling you closer to his body.

“Don’t roll your eyes at me and answer my question,” Toto told you harshly, making you gulp before you spoke up,

“It was good, funny,” you answered, making him grin.

“That’s what I’ve already guessed since you leaned your body so close to his after he told you some stupid joke.” You were only able to bite your inner cheek at his jealous behaviour, desperately having to stop yourself from rolling your eyes again.

“He just told me a joke, what’s your damn problem here?” You asked him in a mad tone, making the men that stood behind him turn around and take a long look at you.

“You’ve got a problem as well, or what?” You asked one of the man that stared at you like you’re an alien, making toto quickly turn around and apologise before he squeezed your upper arm even tighter and pushed your towards the exit of the big building, swiftly opening the car door of his black Mercedes before he basically threw you in the passenger seat, shutting the door in a harsh motion before he got into the drivers seat, starting the engine.

“That hurt, Toto,” you quietly told him. Toto briefly grinned, “That won’t be the only thing that will hurt tonight,” he mumbled very quietly as you furrowed your brows and gulped at his words.

- - -

The air was definitely very thick between the two of you as you entered the big mansion that Toto let you live in ever since you started dating him.

You quickly went to work and removed your black high heels from your feet, putting them aside as you watched Toto’s gaze following every single move of yours while he removed his blazer and loosened his black tie a bit before he pulled it down, keeping it in his hand.

Just when you wanted to make your way upstairs into the bedroom, toto stretched his long arm out and stopped your moving body by your stomach, not even looking at you when he spoke up,

“Where do you think you’re going, little one… huh?” He asked you in a deep tone, hand now slowly gliding up to your throat, gently wrapping it around your soft skin.

You slightly furrowed your brows before you gulped, “Upstairs, to change,” you answered innocently, but Toto’s hand only tightened around your throat, swiftly pulling your visibly tinier figure in front of his taller one, forcing your to look up at him.

Toto grinned at your answer, looking down at you with a gaze that you already knew all to well, pure anger and jealousy.

“You’re going nowhere tonight, baby,” he whispered before he put his big palm onto the back of your neck and forced you to walk with him towards the other side of the room, harshly pressing your body against the wall, immediately burying his nose into the back of your head.

Your formed your hands into fists as his mouth hovered above your ear, warm breath hitting your sensitive skin now.

“I asked you to come to this gala with me just so I could show all of my colleagues and friends what for a pretty little thing I got myself here,” he mumbled quietly into your ear from behind, slowly unbuttoning his black slacks now,

“But instead they saw what a disrespectful little brat I got myself here,” he finished off while you felt him pushing your thong to the side, exposing your wet cunt.

You whined in a high pitched tone as he swiped his long fingers through your pussy after he spit on them to wet them. Your eyes rolled into the back of your head as his hand was placed around your throat again, softly squeezing it as he watched your wet pussy, swallowing his finger as he shoved two of them into you.

You gasped as he started to thrust his fingers in and out, thumb caressing the side of your neck as he fucked you knuckles deep from behind, making your legs shake.

You leaned your head forward, forehead now pressed against the white wall, “F-Fuck, please t-toto,” you sniffled as tears formed in your eyes, orgasm already approaching you since you were already quite horny in the car,

“P-Please don’t stop…it f-feels so good, oh my g-god,” you whined in a high pitched tone before you heard toto chuckle at your words.

He briefly kissed the top of your head, “Tell me one logical reason why I should let you come right now, sweetheart,” he demanded in a rather kind tone, fingers only going faster by now.

You gasped as his movements got harder, legs already shaking, “I-I, please, I d-don’t know…but please!” You begged him loudly, not giving a damn if the neighbours hear you.

“You don’t know?” He asked you teasingly.

You shook your head, tears gliding down your heated cheeks, “N-No, I’m so s-sorry toto!” You whined pathetically, squeezing your eyes shut as his fingers suddenly slowed their movements down, making you gasp.

“N-No! P-please toto, I'm sorry-”

“Shut. Up., alright?” He tilted his head to the side as his finger left your begging cunt, legs still shaking from the now ruined orgasm.

With shaking legs you fell onto the hard wooden floor, palms balancing your now visibly weak figure while you sniffled, only noticing in the corner of your with tears filled eye how toto sighed before he bend down and brushed some of your hair out of your face.

Tie still clutched in his hand, Toto looked down into you eyes, slightly smirking as he saw how glassy they actually are.

Then, after calming down a tiny bit, toto stood up again, towering in front of your now kneeling figure as he let his black tie dangle in front of your face — smiling as your small grin fell, fresh tears covering your vision again.

“I don’t think that you deserve to see me, schatzi,” toto mumbled in quiet tone, slowly brushing your messy hair behind your ear before he leaned forward and put the tie around your head, covering your vision with the expansive piece of clothing.

You gasped as he glided his fingertips over your neck and down to your shoulder blades, thumb still drawing unknown figures on your heated skin as he spoke up,

“Get up.”

You gulped at his demanding tone but quickly got up and played with your fingers due the nervousness you were currently feeling. Toto got a hold of your waist then and guided you towards — what you’ve guessed — another room. And your guess was right as soon as he turned your body around, picked you up and placed you onto the cold surface of the kitchen counter.

You bit your lip as he spread your legs, quickly removing your bottom lip from in between your teeth again as you suddenly felt him kissing your stomach, making his way towards your begging pussy which was still extremely wet.

“You know, sweetheart,” Toto began as he kissed his way around your pussy lip but then going up your thighs again,

“I though you wanted someone who’s mature and earns a lot of money and is, well… visibly older than you because you just love being seen as the pretty little girl that got herself the rich old man, the CEO of the Mercedes formula one team, you know?” You only nodded and gulped as his lips got closer to your pussy.

“But then you leave my side and walk over to,” he made a brief pause to use his fingers to spread your pussy lips, fingertip of his pointer finger now gently touching your clit, “this immature, young, almost 'no-name' boy and laugh with him and touch him and stare at him like he’s the love of your life,” he told you quietly before he spit on your clit, letting his spit run down to your entrance.

His fingertips were only teasing your clit now even more, spreading the spit all over your clit and entrance, “that’s pretty pathetic if you ask me, baby,” he mumbled under his breath, fingertips now leaving your wet pussy before he blew some air on your clit, making your legs shake again and gasp.

You swallowed and sniffled at his feather light touches and breath that was hitting your clit at the moment, “O-Oh my god,” you whined loudly, “Please toto, I l-love you,” you gasped again as he leaned forward and gave your clit a peck, “I o-only love a-and want you, y-you know-”

“Do I? Do I really know that?” Fingertips only gently touching your big clit now, teasing it as tears made their way down your red cheeks, some falling down your temple, some landing in your open mouth.

He cleared his throat, “Because if I know that — like you claim I do — then you should know, that you should have never even started this conversation with your ex boyfriend, you know how much I hate seeing you with oth-,” he briefly stopped, tongue touching your clit now as he moaned at your taste, briefly spitting on it again before he ran the tip of his tongue all over your clit, “boy's, because they are no men yet.”

You whined in a high pitched tone as he closed his mouth around your clit, sucking on it and flicking it with the tip of his tongue, basically making you see stars while your tears of pleasure and slight pain were still covering your vision — and the black tie, of course.

Your hands gripped the side of the counter as he shook his head from side to side, tongue not leaving your drenching wet pussy for one single second, making entire body shake and fall slightly forward.

“Toto, c-can I-, fuck! O-Oh my g-god, can I p-please see you a-again, please!” You cried out while he didn’t stop eating your pussy like a starved man, groaning and moaning into it, sending strong vibrations through your begging cunt.

Toto briefly removed his head after sucking on your clit for a few seconds, spreading your legs even further apart, almost forcing your knees to touch your collarbone before he went back in to eat you out, slurping your juice up and lapping onto your clit like his life depends on it, quietly humming a low 'mhh, mhh' into your pussy, basically telling you 'no'.

Obviously, you whined as you heard his answer as a new orgasm approached you, tears already staining the black tie that’s still covering your vision. You gasped before your fingers left the kitchen counter and tangled themselves into his hair, slightly pulling his mouth more and more into your pussy.

He briefly looked up at you, flashing you a quick smirk before he started to flick your poor clit with his tongue at an almost unimaginable pace, making you cry out,

“Can I-I please cum, t-toto…please,” you begged in a high pitched tone as your legs started to shake again, fingers gripping his hair now even tighter as the tears only continued to run down your temple.

“I wanna c-cuuuuum,” you cried out as Toto’s movements got even sloppier, making it even harder for you to hold everything back.

He quickly squeezed your thigh to grab your attention since you're slowly falling into subspace, “Tell me you're mine and mine only and I let you cum,” he mumbled into your pussy before he shook his head from side to side again.

You screamed as you almost choked on your tears as he did that again but quickly focusing on your answer since you really needed to cum.

“I-I am yours, toto,” you took a deep breath before you continued, “I'm all y-yours, and yours o-only…I p-promise!” You almost screamed at the top of your lungs as you felt your entire body starting to shake.

Before you came all over his mouth, you saw him smiling like a proud boyfriend, slowly nodding at your answer, “Then you may cum, pretty girl,” he whispered right before he licked all of your cum up, spitting some of it onto your clit but also swallowing some of it, groaning as he did so.

He kissed his way up your things before he stood up and wiped his lips with the back of his hand, looking down at you.

You sniffled as you tried to calm your shaking legs down but nothing helped, as your boyfriend noticed that, he put his arms around you and put your head on his chest, stroking your head.

“Shh, it’s okay… I’ve got you, I always do, don’t it? I’m yours…just like you’re mine.” He told you in a bit of deeper tone, clearly implying the situation with mick. You looked up at him,

“I love you.”

“Oh baby, I love you too,” he whispered, kissing the top of your head.

#fanfic #fanfiction #f1 #toto wolff x reader #toto wolff smut #toto wolff #toto wolff mercedes #toto wolff fanfic #smut #f1 fic #f1 smut #f1 x you #Toto Wolff x fem!reader #Patreon

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dear-ao3 · 5 months ago

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welcome to singapore. formula one’s original night race and what is usually (key and operative word here being USUALLY) the most bonkers race of the whole year.

its hot, its steamy, and a whole lot happened. its october 17th 2024, and i am a whole month late so lets hop to it.

you might be wondering why this is kind of late. well there was a lot that happened and i needed to make sure i included everything. also this update is split between two because there was an ~ event ~ that happened that needed unfortunately its own separate update. that is coming soon. first we do have to get through singapore.

and what makes singapore so special? well as i said its formula 1’s original night race. its also really hot. this is usually the hottest race of the season (were going to ignore qatar 2023 because that was worse but that was an outlier. also we are not at qatar yet). and its just usually kind of insane??? for example:

well no examples actually cause it wont insert. you have to watch the compilation here

so to recap just Quickly cause trust me we really Do Not have the time. singapore has been home to:

-crashgate (2008 where renault had piquet jr purposefully crash so alonso could win and this got exposed because piquet jr got fired the following season and exposed the whole thing. at the same race massa left the pitlane with his fuel hose still attached to the car and as a result lost the race and this cost him the championship and hes now suing over it cause if crashgate hadnt happened he might have won)

-giant lizards on track

-daniel ricciardo being asked if the sweat he is sweating is real sweat and him saying “its real sweat, im a high performance athlete, athletes sweat, kikiki rah! sweat sweat! woo woo!!”

-sebastian vettel won the singapore gp an unholy amount of times and also had the coolest helmets here, (one of them lit up) he also caused a lot of problems here. he is referred to as the lion of singapore because he has the most poles, most wins and most laps led at the circuit

-im about 95% sure that this is where max verstappen, a known geography nerd, pretended to not know what the monaco flag looked like just to talk to charles?

-whole lot of ice baths, sometimes even together and sometimes with sex noises

-also to note: max verstappen has never won here

and we gotta talk briefly about last year:

last year notably this was the single race that a red bull did Not win. carlos won by quite literally the sheer power of friendship and audacity and ignoring the ferrari strategy. he qualified on pole after max got knocked out of q2 by LIAM LAWSON (who was SUBBING for daniel ricciardo who still had a broken hand) (remember this was max’s most dominant era) and it came down to the end, someone crashed towards the end i don't remember who, but there was a late safety car and the running order was carlos, lando, george and lewis. both mercs pitted for new tires, carlos and lando stayed out on their old tires. (remember new tires means car goes faster)

and what ended up happening was that carlos slowed down just enough to get lando into the DRS zone to give him just a little extra speed to stay in front of the two mercedes cars who were trying to pass lando and then carlos. theres a real famous radio of carlos’s race engineer saying “you have lando .8 (seconds) behind with DRS” and carlos saying “yeah its on purpose”

let me remind you all that they were not on the same team. there were no team orders for lando to stay behind carlos, he could have tried to pass, but he didn't. somehow there was enough besties energy between them for lando to understand exactly what carlos was doing and they did in fact pull it off. carlos won the race, lando came in second, george crashed into the barrier on the last lap and lewis came in third.

george actually has crashed on the last lap all three times that carlos has won.

but yea. singapore is usually insane. usually a disaster. usually someone crashes at least once. and theres usually a safety car or a red flag or two or several.

and this year there were some changes:

they changed the layout of the track slightly, getting rid of one of the corners i think and adding a 4th DRS zone for extra speedy

but we are not quite there yet. first we gotta get through the days leading up to the race.

starting with mick and esteban who played paddle together and as usual they managed to look like a married couple

somebody had george do an event at a puma store and he got very very excited about it and kept waving at people in the most unhinged way possible

lando announced that he is officially having a section of a grandstand in silverstone be designated for lando fans …. tbh not sure what the purpose of this is but it definitely happened. and i think it sold out.

everyone went off and played paddle together. well, everyone except for george.

george played paddle with his team at a different time, and got absolutely soaked by the rain.

this is interesting because the last time george was photographed in the pouring rain after…. idk brazil?? last year??? he got pneumonia. and still drove the car and finished out the season. but he was coughing everywhere. and generally not vibing. and told the fia that they should fix the calendar to make it more conducive for general driver health (as in don't have a double header when the two races are on exact opposite points on the globe) and the fia responded by making the last 6 races back to back triple headers.

lando and daniel had the return of their individual jpg accounts on instagram. i might have put this on last weeks post. that was wrong. sorry. things get jumbled and i don't have a good system for this lol.

charles and pierre had fun with their dogs. i cant find the pictures. trust me that it happened.

charles also did an unboxing of a pack of driver cards for a fan. and its a very grainy and baffling video. mostly because he explicitly calls max verstappen hot. as in he pulls out max’s card and says “ooooo we are getting to the hot ones!!!”

and of course i cant find the link.

anyway this was a massive improvement from 2019 when, upon being asked if he thought max was “pretty” by seb (seb actually said british but charles misheard and thought hs said pretty) he blue screened for several minutes and was like “uhhhh i don't-i don't know”

max and daniel and lando all flew to singapore together. this will become relevant later on.

so singapore is Not alex albon’s home race (he races under the thai flag, but hes half thai half british) but he sorta counts singapore as a home race and he had a cool helmet:

also with cool helmets were lando, oscar, and zhou

oscar’s even looked a bit like seb’s from 2013 which made many people feel things as this was Seb’s Track

but in the wise words of one lando norris “if you're blinded its probably oscar, if you're like damn….whos that? then its probably me”

mclaren decided to do special suits for this weekend. they looked like cheese sticks.

petronas (which is apparently an oil company) celebrated 50 years and so mercedes did a special livery for it.

vcarb also did a special livery. it was….well i’ll just show you.

yes. that is a denim livery. no i have no idea either.

one team definitely did not have a special livery and that was red bull.

red bull came out and said that they would not be running any other special liveries for the year because they added too much weight to the car, and their car is already not really working that well.

well they actually phrased it in a far more perplexing way than that:

and if you're thinking that hm. that’s worded a little weirdly. also note that this was posted the same day that their head of brand communications and etc went to moto gp.

then, even more interestingly, they said:

“we traced the development history and it turned out that the first mistake we made was with an underbody upgrade in 2023 barcelona. that was also the race that checo started having problems, but we didn't take it so seriously because max kept winning.”

now. that's fucking wild. (i think redbull said newey was not involved in that update but i cant remember)

its also fucking wild bECAUSE there is a clip from drive to survive. and if you're unfamiliar with drive to survive, its the netflix show about formula 1 (mostly grounded in facts but they spin the drama to create narratives and they also leave stuff out, still a good show tho). and i believe it was in the season about the 2021 season (?) which i think is season 4 (?) there is a scene where the various team principals are having some sort of meeting to talk about porpoising. which is when the car bounces up and down and it was a safety risk and blah blah etc. this was the first year of the cost cap (meaning no unlimited funds to fix the issue), and the mercedes car had this problem really badly.

i think that the context of this conversation is that toto is saying that teams should either share how theyve solved the problem (cause some teams had, this was a problem that affected almost everyone, something with the regulations) or they should be allowed to use more money to fix it even if it meant going above the cap cause it was a safety issue. im not sure. its something along those lines.

anyway. this was Peak christian horner and toto wolff insanity. max and lewis were battling for the lead all year and christian took this opportunity to essentially yell at toto and it resulted in quite possibly one of the most stand out moments of drive to survive, which is the infamous change your fucking car clip:

and yeah even though this was for a different season, its still fucking hilarious cause guess what? toto was right. they did need to change their fucking car and checo Had said that the car was fucked And they ignored it. look whos laughing now red bull. its definitely not you.

and last but absolutely most definitely not least: mercedes posted the best pr of the season.

no i am not joking.

what could possibly be the best pr of the year??

lewis and george dressing eachother, obviously.

and if theres one video you watch on this post i sincerely hope that it is this one:

i don't know whos idea this video was, but it is everything. its wonderful. theres a mother version where theyre picking the clothes. theres another version where lewis does a legitimate heel click. ankle showing, the fact that you can tell theres about 50 people watching them based on how many people start laughing. its an artistic masterpiece. hats off to you mercedes pr team (just this once).

moving into the weekend itself.

and kevin magnussen spoke words about his race ban. here’s what he had to say: “you get punished and then you come back. and you're all ready to fuck shit up now! its funny how that works” please remember this for later.

also there were a lot of jokes about what he was doing on his week off when he got banned, but turned out that he was visiting sick children at the ronald mcdonald house in copenhagen

ollie bearman was allowed to take over the ferrari social media accounts. not sure Why they allowed this but it was hilarious. he did the instagram and the twitter and then he was also a track side reporter for a while

he mostly used his new social media powers to post insane pictures of kimi, who might i remind you, is in no way affiliated with ferrari.

franco, daniel, yuki and alex all did a fan forum together and clearly no one from either teams social media team was there for some reason because they ended up with a weird video of them all being baffled by using a 360 go pro video as pretty much the only content from that and during this video alex made fun of yuki for being short and daniel brought back the “ki ki ki!” chant that he (and max) love so much.

it was sweetcorn, zhou’s cat’s, birthday this week and stake posted more photoshopped pictures of sweetcorn in the garage

oscar flamed lando for wearing a hoodie in jeans in singapore when it was 38C and humid as hell

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george flamed lando for this same thing later in the week on his instagram story. he filmed the sun, then panned to lewis who was standing under a giant umbrella to block the sun, saying “super sunny, sunglasses on, looking cool.” then he panned to lando in a long sleeve shirt and a vest, jeans and a hat, with his arms crossed like he was shivering. “ready for winter season already…”

valtteri bottas posted another f1 track guide, where he cycles around the track and explains all the turns

a bunch of drivers all got asked to sign pictures of their younger selves a la that one trend. it was entertaining.

and someone figured out that williams photoshopped franco’s face over the photos of logan that they use for announcing driver points and etc. u know, all the promotional ones that they take at the beginning of the year? they also spelled his name wrong (again).

and pierre and yuki caused some problems in little go kart? scooter? things??

“saph.”

yes, dearest reader??

“this is singapore. surely you have more interesting things to be talking about than weird go karts?”

why yes i do. my apologies.

so mclaren was under fire for a potentially illegal rear wing.

essentially, there was a little tiny part on the back of the mclaren rear wing that flexes, giving them a much smaller version of the full DRS (when you open the rear wing to go faster within 1s of car in front of you) (except they were using this all the time). this came to light during/after the previous race in baku. it seems like they found a loophole and they are exploiting it. which is not unheard of even remotely for any team. its kinda what makes the whole thing interesting.

the fia was not really doing anything about it, and said that everyone was in the regulations, despite alleged complaints from other teams, so max, charles and checo decided to take matters into their own hands.

max said:

“i mean, its quite clear, of course, that its moving at speed. it might be smart, it might be not smart, but at the end of the day, its up to the fia, of course, to decide it its legal or not….of course baku was not the first time it was used. there were other tracks as well. i guess its important to come with a clarification. but that's not only on the rear wing. its the front wing as well. but what is allowed, how much it is allowed to bend, all these kinds of things, right? so we just have to wait and see from our side.”

charles went a bit further:

“i think fred (vasseur) will go on that matter a bit more into detail, but from what i have been told, it is controversial to say the least. i will leave that here and i will let fred comment on it a bit further”

that is still slightly tame for charles leclerc. worry not. he said more unhinged things later on, such as “we don't have a mini drs as an upgrade” *laughs* when asked how he felt about the ferrari upgrades.

fred did later comment on the mclaren wing. fred being the team principal of ferrari. he had a very team principal response:

"The front wing we agree is a grey area because you can't design a part of the car with the intention of deformation [flexing]. Intention is difficult to manage," explained Vasseur.

"The rear wing story is completely different because in the article [regulations] there is a maximum deflection. This is not grey. It's black and black. For me, it's clear."

no one went as far as checo though, who straight up told the press:

"It’s clear that it’s out of the regulation. It’s an illegal car. But it seems like, it is allowed. I'm very surprised."

red bull was very quick to play the pr game with this. they issued a statement clarifying his comment, saying that checo’s accent (hes mexican) made it sound like he had said “illegal” when he had actually said “legal” making his statement instead read as “It’s clear that it’s out of the regulation. It’s a legal car.” which. doesnt really make too much sense and is kind of weird for them to even say. but that was the story red bull went with.

call outs aside, mclaren maintained that their rear wing was legal because it passed all the fia tests. this also came after mclaren started leading the championship, so its not Really a surprise that these call outs happen (if anyone was around in 2021 when mercedes and red bull were fighting for the championship they were calling eachother out left right and center every other week for everything under the sun and then even a few things under the moon). oscar expressed this, saying that:

"Obviously in the sport you find every bit of performance that you can without breaking the rules, and that is what we are doing and what you need to do to become a championship-winning car and team.”

he also maintained that the rear wing was legal (and even said he had no idea about the flexing, which is possible), as did zak brown, the ceo. zak also though continued to blame it on “oh well were leading the championship now! obviously people will hate us!!!” as seen here:

"I think it's inevitable now that we're leading the championship that everyone will be looking at our car and saying, 'not sure I like that', and that's the nature of the game."

and also here

"I think it's great for the championship. We're running at the front, so there are going to be things that are clearly working well on our race car. And to your point, everyone else is going to try to speed up and slow us down at the same time. Welcome to Formula 1."

which you know is true. but we cant be running illegal cars can we now, zak??

still, on friday, mclaren released this statement on the whole rear wing debacle:

"Whilst our Baku rear wing complies with the regulations and passes all FIA deflection tests, McLaren have proactively offered to make some minor adjustments to the wing following our conversations with the FIA. We would also expect the FIA to have similar conversations with other teams in relation to the compliance of their rear wings.”

which is kind of funny cause theyre like oooooh we didn't do it! definitely not! but just in case we did we will make sure we never do it again!!! but also!!!!! hehe we’re going to drag you all down with us XD

the fia then did a little more digging and said this:

“The FIA is closely monitoring the flexibility of bodywork on all cars and reserves the right to request teams to make modifications at any point during the season…However, if a team successfully passes all deflection tests and adheres to the regulations and technical directives, they are deemed to be in full compliance, and no further action will be taken…The FIA is currently reviewing data and any additional evidence that has emerged from the Baku GP and is considering any mitigating measures for future implementation…This is part of the standard process when scrutineering technical legality, and the FIA retains the authority to introduce regulatory changes during the season if required.”

(hilariously, the rear wing was the only one under fire, as we know fred vasseur was also talking about the mclaren front wing, which was found to be probably mostly legal after baku, so ferrari made their own probably mostly legal version of the front wing to catch up to mclaren)

in other words….we smell something hinky going on here and it may be a rat called mclaren.

later though, the wing was found to be illegal. the fia said that the flap edges were not allowed to bend on the straights.

so after all that. they were still in the wrong.

in any case. how about a nice dose of contract news.

starting with logan sargeant

yes, i mean logan sargeant. the ex williams driver. hes been seen now a few times in the indy car paddock and its heavily rumored that he might be getting a contract in indy car sometime soon because hes supposedly doing a test in november.

but back to f1.

and very surprisingly, george russell???

so no, george has not signed a contract. mostly because his current contract at mercedes goes through i believe the end of 2025. but there is talk. some quotes came out from bradley lord, who is the mercedes communications chief, about how the team want to sign max for 2026 potentially. supposedly, he said that “we’re aiming to bring max verstappen to mercedes in 2026. that’s no secret” and as u all know they just recently signed kimi antonelli so would they give up their fresh young kimi talent or would they give up george??? well. supposedly bradley Also said this “they’ll [kimi and george] be focused on making their mark next year. but if max doesnt join. we’re certainly keen to continue with the same line up!”

which a lot of people took to mean that holy shit theyre going to drop george. george who worked his absolute ass off to get into the mercedes seat is going to get dropped for max who will only want to be in f1 for like 2 more years at that point.

until! mercedes made a statement that said that all statements said by bradley about the team wanting max for 2026 had been “fabricated.” so george lives to see another day. or does he???

im not sure cause chrtisian horner then made a comment that said “george russell is out of a contract at the end of next year, you’d be foolish not to take that into consideration.” which is Intriguring. cause imagine if u will george at red bull. yeah i cant really either. someone would die and it wouldnt be him.

in any case, mercedes said basically that george is their Guy and they want him at mercedes for awhile blah blah blah. but again, this is formula 1 and that means positively nothing because anything can happen ever.

case in point: the red bull seat drama. well not the red bull seat drama. the vcarb seat drama.

as we know by now, there have been rumors pretty much all season that danny rics is going to get replaced by liam lawson. well this week those rumors got ramped up from about a 7/10 to a 234234/10. nothing was confirmed, obviously, but everyone, and i mean everyone, from reporters to drivers to well again, everyone, seemed kind of convinced that this Could be daniels last race. im not quite sure Where this rumor evolved from, but it was pretty intense and pretty rampant. so just keep that in the back of your mind.

moving forward. max verstappen. he decided to be an icon this week. well. more than usual.

first, when asked about how he felt about ferrari being able to take points off of mclaren, max said “i hope so! for them and myself” which is funny, we love a menace.

he was also asked if daniel deserves to stay in f1 for next year (because remember there are rumors that this is his last race. i know theres a lot going on here, try to keep up) and max said

“it doesnt really matter or not if he deserves to be here. a lot of people deserve to be here and some don't deserve to be here that's life also you know in all kinds of sports. that's how it goes.”

he also said this while sitting next to lance.

but then the real icon shit started.

at the press conference on media day max was asked, as drivers normally are, about his car. he said:

“went into qualifying, i knew the car was fucked.”

the moderator for the panel said “thank you max. lets watch our language going forward.” you know because recently theres been all that talk of the fia wanting the drivers to not curse on the radio and etc etc. we know people have taken issue with this, weve seen it before, but i believe that this was the first time it was said in a press conference.

max went on to say “if its not in this room, maybe somewhere else, everyone swears. some people a bit more than others. it also depends a bit on what language you speak. of course, abuse is something else. in other sports you don't run around with a mic attached to you. i think a lot of people say a lot of bad things when they are full of adrenaline in other sports. it just doesnt get picked up. so i think it already just starts with not broadcasting it. this will help a but more than putting bans on drivers because, for example, i couldn't even say the f word. and that's not even that crazy. i mean, the car was not working. the car is f’d. and then, excuse my for the language, but come on. like. what are we? five year olds? six year olds? even if a fice year old or a six year old is watching, i mean, they will eventually swear anyway. even if the parents wont, or they will not allow it, when they grow up, they will walk around with their friends and they will be swearing.”

he also Extra later said that “the word [fuck] is ordinarily used in speech as [i] learned it, english not being [my] native language.” which is Exceptionally hilarious. max definitely knows what curse words are he knows that everyone knows this.

all you know fairly standard and normal shit for this topic of discussion. we have seen it all before.

this was actually shockingly similar to something that sebastian vettel said back in 2018 about swearing on the radios (because seb used to swear kind of a lot on the radios) he said:

“do you think comparing to football if you have a microphone on a [football player’s] mouth, everything he says is something nice and is a nice message when the guy tackles him and maybe sometimes he fouls him or not?”

seb has also come under fire for swearing before and some of his other responses have included "I think if you are sensitive you should watch, I don't know, some kids' program. You have the remote control in your hand, so you can choose."

and i cannot find it unfortunately but he did also say at one point that he doesnt think about kids (or his own kids?) while driving the car, in terms of whether or not he is swearing over the radio.

prior to this press conference, fia president mohammed ben sulyam asked f1 to limit the swears on live tv and said “they say the f word how many times per minute?” (he also compared them to searing like rappers. lewis called him out on that statement for being borderline racist) which is just. sir we have better things to be thinking about. (id also like to remind everyone that not many of the drivers like this guy, i know i talked about it on some other update but at least someone maybe lewis said that they never had confidence in him) in any case, no one thought anything of it.

until This Happened:

and then later, This:

max, and pretty much everyone else, as you could imagine, were highly displeased with this.

because yeah. three time world champion max emillian verstappen has to do a day of community service for saying that his car is fucked.

again i repeat: A DAY OF COMMUNITY SERVICE.

for context, there has been exactly 1 driver that i can think of who has actively tried to not swear on the radio and that was mick schumacher. one time he didn't get into q2 or q3 of qualifying and instead of cursing on the radio he said “uhh beep! beep beep beep!” as if censoring his own swear words. he did though make an exception and cursed out nikita mazepin once after he nearly tried to kill him.

and with that, finally, we are at the practice sessions.

see, i told you that singapore is off the walls.

in any case. practice 1 and 2.

franco colapinto accidentally drove through the alpine pit box. he found the whole ordeal hilarious and himself, williams, alpine and even duracell made fun of the event on instagram

checo got ahead of pierre on the outlap. pierre very ominously said over radio “ill remember him.”

george found a wall. not dissimilarly to how he found the wall last year on the last lap of the race. he also spent a lot of time during practice ranting about the tires and how they were inconsistent. so much so that pirelli had to have a sit down with him and ban him from talking about tires. it didn't really work. also alex albon joined in on the tire bashing in a symbol of friendship.

charles stood with max on the swear ban situation by cursing over his radio during practice

and fernando alonso had something go so drastically wrong with his car that he pressed every button at once he later said that this was inspired by the fact that one time his oven freaked out and he pressed every button at once and it fixed it

zhou managed to go faster than valtteri which was insane and out of the ordinary.

clearly someone new was in charge of the graphics because….

and there was more graphic action. red bull was not doing too hot, as evidenced by This very upsetting and embarrassing graphic

it was also evidenced by the fact that franco decided to race max on his outlap, which max found funny and started laughing about. franco clowned him on instagram for this. love an unhinged little rookie. (weve said it a million times we will say it again: welcome back sebastian vettel)

max was asked about his community service penalty after the practice sessions. he was asked by the reporter if she could “have a word” about it and max said “no words” and walked away.

post practices we had the start of the ice baths. including alex albon, who managed to flame george russell in an instagram comment by saying that “For once it’s not George topless… 👀”

and checo was joined in the bath by a rubber duck

and of course, we also had the return of the infamous nico hulkenberg and kevin magnussen ice bath

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keep in mind that prior to the ice bath, nico said “singapores fabulous and its one of the highlights of the year. i love the track, the challenge of it, and the physicality of the race. ill also be doing my ice baths with kevin again, so ive brought something special to wear!”

straight into practice three which i will do a better job covering because….well you will see why. but to start some fans gave will buxton a leo pillow, which will delivered to the ferrari garage and the mechanics put it in charles’s car.

and then, of course, we had the return of everyones favorite little blonde guy: nico rosbeg.

also like if you need to take a break and grab some water of a snack id recommend doing that now. i know this is a long ass one. my apologies, i unfortunately don't control f1. if i did they would be allowed to swear.

anyway. practice 3.

we had crofty and anthony davidson discussing the normal stuff. the ground effects, the set ups, the curbs etc etc. and as they were talking about the heat crofty said:

“so you will notice that there are not one, not two but three people in the worlds smallest commentary box as we all huddle together, which is not the nicest thing on the planet when we are in singapore because i can feel the heat radiating off of nico rosberg as i speak as he has just bolted from the paddock into the commentary box here! uh nico, glad you're with us. we’re looking at the red bull. did their lack of pace surprise you yesterday?”

“its a pleasure to be here again. and crofty we shouldn't be complaining, we have the aircon right on us. its pretty awesome.”

“we can feel the warmth coming off of you. you're like a pirelli tire that’s just done a qualifying session.”

*sighs* “so uh yes um! you were speaking about max verstappen there?”

welcome back nico rosberg. oh how we have missed you. there is a clip for that scene actually. you too can see nico rosberg being called an omega in heat in real time.

not only did nico have opinions about the air conditioning, he also had opinions about max, saying that “he could loose the world championship” if the car doesn't get sorted out. (there was no grip, hard to drive, etc etc).

he also Instantly started giving mechanical insight (as usual) and anthony even said that he wanted to “pick [nico’s] brain about three wheeling” and nico was more than happy to get picked:

“yeah so the worst about three wheeling is that obviously as you're going through the corner, your car rolls to the outside, yeah? the first thing that it will pick up is the inside front. worst thing about that is that it disturbs the aerodynamics massively as that tire disconnects from the ground. cause the aerodynamics are developed with the tires connected to the ground and the air flow. and the front tire has a huge impact in terms of flow on the overall aerodynamics. if it comes off the ground suddenly you've got air flow under the tire and it really influences really badly the main reason that you want to stop that and you want to stop that by mechanically going very soft on the front or of course adding some front load aerodynamic and as you can hear, its very very challenging to get those different elements right so that your car performs optimally.”

so there you have it. just one problem the drivers and the teams were trying to navigate this weekend.

another thing they were trying to navigate? lizards on track.

ted was explaining something when crofty went “now hold on two seconds ted, weve got a lizard on track.”

ted, surprisingly, went “AH! great! we havent had one so far! fantastic!”

there were many lizards last year. they named it larry apparently. crofty told ted to go talk to larry and make sure he was safe. he also called the present lizard lionel.

ted had information to report and it was that the lizard looked like it was doing “the floss.” i can only assume he meant the fortnite dance.

ted also had to report that mercedes was not doing great, but! fred vesti (one of the development drivers for mercedes) had spent all night in the simulator doing work for them and the last time they had had him do that it had panned out quite well.

nico though had doubts and was like mmm well idk how much he can do because “it can only do as well as the data you put in it and with the wind tunnel information that is just not accurate”

anthony was a development driver for mercedes back when nico was there, so crofty naturally had to ask: “out of interest, how many late nights did you have making sure that nico rosberg could win the 2016 formula 1 word championship?”

“loads. he owes it all to me i think.”

“i havent offered you a beer for that yet so that still remains to be done.”

and while that was happening, fernando was nearly hitting lionel the lizard who was still on the track.

“we are told the track is clear, but just have a look for the lizard,” his engineer said.

“no it is in the middle of the track,” fernando insisted, correctly.

the camera zoomed in on the lizard strutting. and boy, was it strutting. the marshalls even impersonated it

“that is a stride with the purpose of lawrence stroll. so frankly maybe it is lawrence the lizard coming across the track there,” crofty said. ladies and gentlemen, the pinnacle of motorsport.

the session was then red flagged. and crofty speculated if there was a lizard remover to nico rosberg, who wanted nothing to do with it.

“can i go from lawrence the lizard to lawrence stroll?” he asked, referring to lawrence signing newey, as nico practically leaked to the press a few weeks ago. newey will Not though be helping with the 2025 car, but the 2026 car, which is the one with the new regulations.

nico tried to ask about the money aspect, or the “insider information” and if he got equity in the team and etc etc.

crofty found this funny. “its always about money with you isnt it? did you get equity in alpine?”

unfortunately nico didn't answer because one of the marshalls started chasing the lizard off the track. and it turned into a regular drag race. so much so that the f1 instagram account made fun of it.

but back to newey. he does in fact have equity in the team because he is a managing partner.

this intrigued nico. “how much?”

crofty, *scoffing* “you cant ask me questions like that?”

“and do you know who did the deal? andy jordan! so how much equity does andy jordan have in the team? because usually its 20 percent!”

“look i don't know officially but i think its about 2 percent. in the f1 team”

“that's similar to what patty lowe got at the time when he went to williams, he was taken from mercedes. he also got a certain percentage.”

“okay. so that would be in the right ballpark there.”

“2 percent is a lot, by the way. because that team is valued at 1.6 billion and it is only going to go up.” and nico is right, its 32 million. “so that 2 percent is going to be north of 50 million very soon.”

and then crofty made fun of him about the supposed alpine deal that he told everyone about the last time he was commentating: “so you’re thinking, hm maybe i should have responded to that email.”

nico then provided some insight into whether or not newey is going to make aston a championship winning team. and he said it depends on how it all gels together and how well everyone seems to work together. essentially newey can lead them to the kool aid but he cant force them to drink.

nico also expressed that he wanted adrian to come on his podcast and explain how he can draw better than a computer because it would be “so so cool”

crofty said “should we ask him if he wants to go on your podcast? how about adrian newey on the sky f1 podcast with yourself and f1tv’s matt baker?”

nico, disappointedly, “can i- can i not prefer my podcast?”

“not when you're working for us for the weekend!”

*mumbling* “okay, sorry….we can talk about it after the weekend”

“other podcasts are available, but not when you’re working for us mate.”

and then we started to properly delve into the daniel rumors again.

according to ted, liam lawson was down in the pit lane, specifically in daniels side of the garage. and he was “hanging around, looking at what daniel’s doing in the car and seemingly getting to know his car crew and uh he has to do that if they decide to put him in for the us grand prix. while daniel, if he can get that car to fourth or third, will be thinking, no i can hang onto this drive.”

though to be fair, this was what liam had been doing all season.

and red bull seemed to have fixed their issues from yesterday because max was back at the top of the times, and even said that “the car is much better”

and mclaren, despite not having their illegal rear wing, were right behind red bull.

“I need a new set of gloves for the next stint” george said over the radio.

“so what's happening to george here is that he is sweating his hands off,” nico explained. “and its horrible when you have sweaty gloves cause the glove connects really well to the steering wheel and your hand inside the glove is like going and slipping around and its a horrible feeling. that's also why sometimes you see under the safety car drivers holding their hands up, trying to get some wind in those gloves to cool it down. so that's why he needs new gloves. now back to whoever i was talking about-”

“i was playing golf this morning,” crofty interrupted.

“i was making an important point!”

“i was playing golf,” crofty continued, ignoring nico. “and talk about sweaty gloves i lost my grip after about three holes today. that's why my putting was so bad”

“crofty. i appreciate your golf so much but i was making an important point.”

“we’d all forgotten what you were saying.”

*softly* “i forgot too”

(there is a clip for this one)

nico remembered his point a little bit later. it was about the track layout and how he likes this layout better. and the second point was about the geometry of max’s car and how they might have overcorrected the steering of the car and compensated another part of it. i don't know much about this part of cars, but it seemed like he might be correct.

meanwhile, george bonked into the wall. or he had a lockup. they couldn't really tell. but he spun around and went back into the pits.

this was just an example of how difficult the track is for everyone, turns, big cars and concrete barriers. and a lot of going fast. and a hell of a lot of heat.

“you know when you used to train when you were driving?” crofty asked nico. “and youd go on the treadmill and youd do uphill walking at a really fast pace and then youd play seven hands of poker while you were doing that?”

“you remember that?”

*unintelligible crofty noises*

nico continued. “well that was because i had to stop cycling to loose the leg muscle! cause that was another kilo!” (yes that is true. weve talked about it before. nico stopped cycling to lose leg muscle to drop his weight so that he could go faster to beat lewis in 2016, this was pre driver weight requirements when most of them all had EDs).

“but i was so impressed, by not just your uphill walking pace because it was pretty fast, but also the mental pressure you were putting yourself under to play seven hands of poker. when it came to races like this were mental fatigue can set in because of the conditions, is that what you were training for at that moment?”

(the conditions being the insane heat)

“the poker got me to win at this track,” nico laughed. but then he went to explain the conditions in the car. “the race time is usually very long here, 80% humidity, its, you're in a sauna in the car. we lose up to eight pounds in body weight in the car in two hours. could you imagine losing 8 pounds from sweating in two hours? i mean its really like, its torture in the car.”

“but its also, having to concentrate for two hours when sometimes you struggle for two minutes.”

“yeah and then the sweat starts dripping in your eyes and your head is pounding from the heat. the concentration in the end can be very difficult yeah.”

this was part of the reason why they took out those corners, to reduce the race time a little.

and don't worry, if you thought that we were going to go a whole session with nico not talking about lewis even once, well this is not that session.

lewis had just done a flying lap, going third fastest when nico said “horrible, horrible lap for lewis. not in terms of, i don't know if in terms of driving but in terms of lap time just so far off george (who was p1), horribly far off.”

anthony tried to point out that it depends on the driver and if they screw up a corner here or there. nico was not having it.

“but for lewis its the whole lap. hes lost just consistently though the whole lap.”

unfortunately, that was all we would get though because max was back out on soft tires and we were about to get the question answered which was: did red bull fix max’s car??

well. nico rosberg was about to take us through the lap.

“okay here we go so now you’ve got drs of course you've got to bring it back up before braking, eighty- fifty meters braking you've got to hit that inside curb perfectly and stay in the white line there. roll into this corner, straighten your steering wheel so you can get that traction down flat and now all the way left so you're a little bit straight with a smaller angle there. deep braking, fifth gear, really carrying the speed all the way to the wall there on the left hand side. now its important to drive in a veeeery smooth way through this corner here, minimum steering, then to the right, straight line the braking again, deepen eighty meters, ooo he missed that inside by like 30 centimeters but nailed the outside. deep braking here. nailed the inside there, again straight steering wheel! put the traction down and then quickly back to the right to have a big, big angle turning in there carrying the speed. a little bit of understeer mid corner then got a snap. now here is difficult, yeah? you’ve gotta brake so deep just carry that speed in, car looked very very settled there. and here is just like, i don't know, magically finding your way through there. now, Softly to go right to open up this corner, misses the apex there by 30 centimeters. bit of traction, you can see the rear starting to overheat so you get a bit of a loose rear. braking deep there, again, missed the apex by like ten centimeters. okay, using the tracking you can see the rear moving around a little bit more around now. now again using minimum steering input, now nail this braking there, around, again, it will be around seventy meters. oh the others are using that curb, he maybe missed it or i don't know, looked pretty good. and now its just like Massive attack through here, again, missed the apex…oooo lost time there. he couldn't commit as much as he wanted to and actually four tenths off russell so this is a bit of a big setback for them actually because we expect leclerc and norris to be faster than russell.”

despite all of that. max still managed to go p3. with a 1:30.5. on softs. george was doing 1:30.125 on softs. he was in p1. then lando went fastest again a 1:29.646. (pole last year was a 1:30.9). (max ended up finishing the session p4. that was where he finished practice 3 last year too, but last year he qualified 11th)

lando also continued to hit all the curbs, as he does because its his style and the car likes it. the red bull clearly doesnt like doing that.

meanwhile, george accidentally drove onto the escape road. not sure how he managed that.

“uh lets focus on driving instead of focusing on (unintelligible) because honestly im not feeling much also because the feeling is shit. we are very slow,” charles said, much to everyones general shock. “i just have no grip”

also baffling, at least to nico rosberg was that checo was “fifteenth in a red bull. and no mistake on the lap.” he speculated that checo could be running something different to max but whos to say.

meanwhile they were changed the front wing slightly on charles’s car to try and fix…something.

and franco was going 4 tenths faster than alex in the low speed corners. which was again, intriguing.

but, it was time for our beloved nico rosberg to leave. but not before he said who he thought was looking good.

“there is only one person looking good. lando, who is in a league of his own, who os driving phenomenally. the way that he is driving his car puts it on rails and then the other surprise this morning has been george russell, who has extracted the maximum from his mercedes. so i would mention those two and that's it theres no one else.”

and then he went off to interview toto. which was Very Interesting indeed

mostly because he was hounding toto about why lewis’s set up was so bad but toto was generally ignoring him.

because if you will remember, lewis said that he didn't think he would even get into q3 with his car in the state he was, and he said that his set up was not as good as george russells. lewis finished the session in p7, george in p2. and if anyone could get to the bottom of it, it was nico rosberg. unfortunately, toto wasn't giving much away.

nico also praised franco after the fp3 session, saying that “colapinto's super impressive, straight from the get go always within two tenths from albon. and we know albon is super quick.” which he says is very impressive because “you know in formula 2 you see speed, but you don't see this kind of speed”

also he was wearing this

“alright,” crofty said, several hours later. “enough of this practice. lets get into qualifying here in singapore.”

yeah. we’re only at qualifying. in all fairness i Did tell you this was going to be a lot.

and the track was not in great condition. which was wonderful.

charles was struggling and got fined for having his tire pressure adjusted in the pit box, lewis’s rear of his car was “sliding a lot,” max was not in p1, lance was somewhere near the bottom of the times and lando immediately went fastest.

so all in all a pretty normal q1. that was, until alex albon briefly went p1 and george decided to bash the tires (after being told not to!)

“ive got no fucking grip mate!” he cursed loudly and over his radio. breaking two rules at the same time. smh george.

as the times came in, daniel found himself pushed to 16th.

“daniel gets pushed down to 16th in what could be his last qualifying,” crofty said, ominously and addressing the rumors that this was in fact daniels last race. the camera crew then decided to rub it in by cutting to a shot of liam lawson in the garage.

in his interview, daniel said that he had “not much to say” about his qualifying over all and about his mindset tomorrow: “well ill get community service if i swear” man was potentially going out at the end of the weekend and Still feared the FIA enough to not say fuck on camera. cheers mate.

in any case, the end of q1 saw us waving goodbye to daniel, lance (who has only managed to make it out of q1 one time at singapore before), pierre, bottas and zhou. better luck next time!

and the start of q2 saw someone taking george’s side in the Great Tire War. laurent mekies. the vcarb team principal. he said that the tires do feel different today compared to yesterday, but apparently this has been an ongoing problem all season.

unsurprisingly, alex albon was also joining the war on tires on the side of george russell. “what are we doing with the tires? nothing! absolutely nothing!”

also on the surprise list was nico hulkenberg briefly going p1.

he was though replaced with lewis, who had somehow managed to make his mercedes work for him.

i don't remember which announcer said this but, someone did say this about that: “mercedes is now the pace setter when before it looked like the steering wheels were screwed into the rear wheels.”

though that might not have been entirely true because george was still complaining about grip.

max seemed to have made the tires work for him though because he managed to go fastest with a 1:29.680, a whole 3 tenths faster than lewis. it was starting to look like a classic Max Pole Lap, that was until oscar went faster than him

so there were four drivers in the 1:29 realm: oscar, max, charles and lewis. and there were five drivers out at the end of q2: alex, franco, checo, kevin and esteban

alex was not happy with this. he spluttered very incoherently over his radio as james vowels attempted to comfort him.

all in all though it was setting up to be a very exciting q3

we had lando whos had 4 poles this yea, max who hasnt had pole since imola, lewis who hasnt had pole since hungary 2023 (potentially i might have heard that wrong) and ferando alonso who hasnt had pole in over 4000 days!

“i wouldnt want to bet my mortgage on whos winning pole,” said martin brundle.

but martin brundle also said during q3 that “we just saw kimi antonelli who will be out there next year getting hot and sweaty and a little bit scared.”

everyone was kind of distracted by that. maybe it was why carlos sainz crashed.

(no it wasn't. but imagine….)

he also managed to crash in the same spot as lance did last year. but he didn't know why: “don't know if it was cold tires, dirty air, i don’t know. big snap.”

this was absolutely not fine and dandy for max because he got his lap time deleted. and it was a provisional pole lap time.

“why did my lap get deleted?” max still asked. “I crossed the line before it was red.”

max did indeed cross the line before it was red, but there were double yellow flags, which mean that all lap times get deleted. so lando also lost his “stonking lap”

so we only had two times on the board. oscar with a 1:30.037 and nico with a 1:30.848.

everyone had one more shot to get out there.

which means its time to learn a weird fact about lando! did you know that his first job was making iphone stickers?

i didn't but there was a graphic on the broadcast that said so.

in any case, max was told on the outlap to try and pass cars so he would make it to the line in time.

george was told “don't let verstappen through”

max got through.

despite that, lando still went fastest. and he got pole.

max continued his pole-less streak at singapore, but he did manage a p2

and charles leclerc, down at ferrari, managed to get his lap time deleted and ended up behind nico, fernano and yuki. somehow.

lando was pleased with his pole, sort of. as much as lando can be pleased about anything. “it was tough,” he said. “good enough for pole.”

max was also seemingly thrilled with second “im happy to be on the front row, I’ll take second, I’m happy with that.” insane words coming from max. if u had told us this last year we would have been shocked.

and in p3 we had…..sir lewis hamilton. but unfortunately nico rosberg was not interviewing :/ still, lewis said “qualifying has been a disaster for me all year long” which is true. he said that they changed pretty much everything on the car, but despite that didn't think that he could keep up with the mclarens. he also indirectly called them cheaters.

the most interesting part of qualifying though was after, in the press conference.

as you might remember, the drivers in p1, p2 and p3 all have a little press conference on the big white couch with the reporters. its usually a little silly at least.

and there was the usual. lewis told everyone “ive not been up here for awhile” cause he hadnt and im sure lando said things too but what was most interesting was max.

now lets remember that max got a day of community service for cursing in the press conference the previous day. he also earlier said that he had “no words” about his penalty.

so it was really no surprise that he spoke as little as humanly possible. as an act of protest to the fia and their penalty.

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now. this is quite possibly one of the best cases of malicious compliance that i have seen. because yeah, he is answering the questions, just with as few words as possible. technically the fia cant get him on this cause he is talking. and he took the time to tell the reporters that this was not aimed at them, but at the fia.

and, if you will note, he said that he wanted to be asked questions outside of the press conference room. which he did in fact entertain. this was actually not allowed.

they started out in the hallway and then some official was like uhhh cant do that here! and max was like well! cmon everyone! we will do it on the go!!!

and they did!!!!

surely, you must be thinking, surely if the lead up was this insane then the race was off the walls right???

….

right!!!!!

yeah….

it was somehow boring????

im not sure how they managed to make singapore boring (especially after the lead up) but it was just like. there. it happened.

ill still talk about it though because i am nothing if not thorough.

the race.

important to note that, heading into this race, there are still 8 contenders for the drivers championship . max, lando, charles, carlos, lewis, george, oscar and checo. none of them are officially Out of the running Yet because theoretically they could still score enough points to beat max. though, lando does have the best shot. he only needs to score 8.4 points per weekend more than max to come out ahead of max at the end.

at the start max has 313 points, lando had 254 and charles had 235.

and. yuki has never finished a race here. lando has never been able to hold p1 from pole at the start. and the track was really, really freaking warm. as in it was 37C / 98.6F. and they were about to drive for two hours in a hot cockpit.

also to note. lewis was starting on softs. which was weird. because they degrade really fast as we know in the heat and they definitely had plenty of heat. probably more than necessary actually.

in any case. lights out. away they went.

and lando managed to hold onto the lead! max was right behind him in drs range, but he was ahead for the whole first lap. a first for him. and by lap 3 max was out of drs range.

someone was unhappy about this and it was george russell. he was still in fourth stuck behind lewis on the softs. “he needs to increase the pace a bit, the guys at the font are getting away,” he said. lewis didn't really pick up the pace though. he really couldn't on the tires. and max and lando were already 3.7 seconds ahead of lewis.

meanwhile franco had an absolutely insane start and managed to somehow divebomb alex albon and not only did he divebomb alex albon, he managed to gain three places.

alex though was not pleased. “franco just dive bombed me!” he said over the radio. “what is he doing?”

unsurprisingly, charles was back in ferrari hell. he was in 8th position and on lap 7 radioed in to say “i took a carbon part on my left side.”

lando was still having a good time though, out in the front. he was told to increase the gap to max to 5 seconds. this was after other teams apparently complained that he wasn't managing the pace well.

martin brundle was impressed by this. “just put 5 seconds on the red bull, will ya? it’s incredible!”

the tire drama of course continued, hards were apparently worse than mediums according to kevin.

“i’m sliding around like hell,” he said on lap 11

and george was still stuck behind lewis who was over 6 seconds behind max and had not managed to make up any positions.

also stuck behind someone was checo. he was stuck behind franco somewhere down around 10th? maybe? and he had been since pretty much the start.

“hes very good, very difficult to pass colapinto” checo said on lap 16. lets remember that checo has 275 races under his belt. franco has like 3. so he was having a good day.

alex albon was not. he dnf’d on lap 18 because his car was overheating.

lewis finally got rid of his soft tires, so george could finally attempt to show some pace. by lap 23 he had managed to wrestle his car into 11th, but he bashed the strategy because they had stopped so early. “we will be in trouble later.” and by lap 28 he said “im already struggling with this tire.”

and charles was still in ferrari hell. “good job on the brakes,” his engineer told him. “yeah but they feel completely different now,” charles said. he was stuck behind alonso and hulkenberg down in like 7th or 8th or something. exactly where he had been since the start. “ah this is so frustrating!” charles said. “how many laps are we going to do this?”

lando was still enjoying himself though. he had gotten a 20 second lead on max.

lewis was really not enjoying himself. he continued to complain about stopping early and then almost bottled it passing and getting re passed by yuki. “something is definitely wrong with the car,” he said.

“this is working out horribly for charles leclerc,” martin said, as charles was still stuck behind a haas on lap28

thankfully for everyone, he managed to pass the haas on the next lap and took p4.

lando had front wing damage because he had locked up. he could have gotten a new front wing on his pit stop, but it takes 12 seconds to do that and despite their gap, mclaren didn't want to risk it.

george was really starting to feel the heat. “I need a bit of encouragement mate,” he said on lap 33. which is something that he really only says when hes a few minutes from actively passing out.

“usually by this time theres another 40 laps to go….but now we might get home in time for a cup of cocoa!” crofty said. because usually there is at least a safety car or a red flag or an accident. but there was nothing. and there continued to be nothing. meaning that the drivers were not getting a break. and it was hot as balls and or tits.

down at vcarb, daniel was in 12th and yuki was in 13th. yuki was gaining on him and after some deliberation from the team, they had daniel let him past.

“we’re expecting an announcement in the next few days” for liam to replace daniel, the announcers said. though there was still nothing confirmed.

meanwhile charles was on fresh tires and he was storming up through the ranks. he went past carlos and waved at him and then he put in fastest lap after fastest lap, his eyes on the podium.

“it’s like a sauna in here,” george said, still struggling.

lando was also struggling. he boinked the wall again.

and checo was struggling with his tires “i don't have traction mate, its bouncing like a kangaroo.” he was in 10th.

kevin got a puncture. he was brought in for softs to potentially set a fastest lap.

“i have understeer and i have oversteer” george said on lap 52. on lap 53 he said “just kissed the wall. thinking all fine, rear right.”

again i remind you this is a long and hard race. previously the longest singapore had gone without a safety car was lap 36.

everyone was getting tired, even charles’s engineer who told him accidentally that george was in p1 instead of lando. charles said, very eloquently: “i don't care about norris”

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lando had though started to lap people, which was dangerous. he clipped a few more walls briefly. “hes having a few adventures in his most dominant play in f1 so far” martin said.

meanwhile charles had finally closed the gap to george and was trying to pass. it was tire whisperer on tire whisperer violence. but george managed to stay in front.

k mags went into the pits on lap 60. he retired his car.

daniel also went into the pits on lap 60. on what might have been his last ever f1 race.

“don't go out like this danny rics, on a three stop,” crofty all but begged.

but he didn't. they put softs on his car and said go forth and get the fastest lap. which was currently held by lando.

and so daniel, in true daniel fashion, said (probably) “fuck em all” and stuck his pedal to the goddamn metal and went so fast that he not only got the fastest lap, but he also got the track record fastest lap. with a 1:34.486

and when the checkered flag came out lando won, and daniel got the fastest lap.

max’s race engineer came on during the cool down lap to tell him the car modes and where he finished (second) but he also said “your old pal daniel picked up a fastest lap”

and max said “thank you, daniel.”

because you see. daniel took the fastest lap from lando. since he didn't finish in the points, he didn't get the extra point for fastest lap. but he did take the extra point away from lando.

so this means. that given the number of races left. if lando finishes one place ahead of max in every single remaining race, he will still lose the championship by one point. the point that daniel took from him.

in 2018 daniel ricciardo left red bull because max started getting preferential treatment (among other things). it was a shock move, but he did it because he didn't want to be a number 2 driver, he wanted to win a world championship. so he went to renault. it was a disaster. he went to mclaren. it was a worse disaster. he lost his mclaren contract. he admitted that he got bad advice to leave red bull and that he should have never left. he came back to vcarb mid 2023 to try and get back into the red bull seat, back next to max. but he didn't. and in his potential, final act of his f1 career, he still managed to make a move that benefitted max. after all this time, he was still the second red bull driver after all.

and he was voted driver of the day.

lando won, followed by max, oscar, george, charles, lewis, carlos, fernando, nico, checo, franco, yuki, esteban, lance, guanyu, valtteri, pierre and daniel.

david coulthard did the post race interviews.

oscar said it was “warm” and that they had a “great result…good strategy.”

max was not really bothered about lando closing the gap to him in the championship and was excited for some time off.

lando said it was an “amazing race, a few too many close calls….similar to qatar last year….little dizzy at the moment.” to which david coulthard dumped water on him.

speaking of drivers being dizzy. george (and franco) took a while to get out of their cars. and george ended up leaning on the tires after too.

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george and lewis were actually withdrawn from media duties post race because of “borderline heatstroke” according to toto. some people thought that that might have been a pr move so that lewis did not have to talk about the awful strategy they put him on. in any case, they were given time to not be dying, which was good.

this was not really surprising given that this was george's post race radio: "Yeah, good points, considering where we were on Friday. Damage limitation. I need a carry(?) into the bath, I am toasty. I can't describe how hot it is guys."

i was going to show you all the george russell pics of him after he got out of the car, where he looks like hes simultaneously going to fall over and also kill someone. but it crashed the post 3 times. so if you want to see it you need to google it yourself.

meanwhile. in the cool down room. lando max and oscar were watching the race highlights. max said that he thought lando was going to lap him.

they replayed one of the scenes where lando was boinking walls. lando said, very eloquently and against the rules: “i thought i was going to shit myself”

and oscar, ever the jokester, turned to him and said “so now without using swear words how did you feel in that moment?” and made a little microphone out of his hand.

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oscar continued to make fun of the swear ban later on with this caption on instagram: “Without swearing, that was blinking warm. Good race, nice podium”

and later on charles said that he was not going to swear because he didn't want to join max in community service: "Yes! Then i have to work with Max and I don't want it!"

and max said relatively nothing in the press conference again, but he held his own mini one in a room afterwards.

and franco responded to checo complimenting his driving during the race, saying that "Checo's great, I love him so much. I used to watch him when I was a kid back in Argentina. I woke up very early to watch his races and now fighting and racing against him is very nice."

nico rosberg said this a few days later about lando's race:

“There’s three moments here. And that’s so strange. I can’t remember myself, or Max Verstappen, or Lewis, when leading so comfortably with thirty seconds making three major mistakes like that. That was a bit strange. I know Singapore is so hard concentration [wise]. Physically it’s so, so tough. But it was… I don’t know what it’s down to that there’s so many little… But we know that from Lando that he tends to make those little errors all the time everywhere. We’ve seen that from him.”

so does he have what it takes to be a WDC? idk...

meanwhile. daniel.

he took a long time getting out of his car, clearly savoring the moment.

when asked about the fastest lap he said that if the point proved useful maybe max would get him a good christmas gift (max later said that he could ask for anything he wanted). but he was generally quite emotional as he was speaking about the whole thing in his interview.

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and he did say “maybe the fairytale ending didn't happen. if this is it…im at peace with it.”

and he got an honor walk from the vcarb garage

max spoke highly of him in his interview

"Daniel and I go a long time way back. We have always had a great relationship, great friendship. We've always had a lot of respect for each other as well. He's just a great guy, you know? I get on well, it just clicks, there is no fake person, we just get along and easy going. He will for sure be remembered as a very fast driver, I think everyone knows that, but also as a great guy in the paddock."

i think every reporter tried to give him a send off

they showed him a highlight reel of his career. and nico rosberg asked him if he regretted "leaving max in red bull."

daniel also spoke highly of max, saying that "He's always been very appreciative of our friendship and supportive. Even after Japan this year I was getting quite a lot of stick, and he [Max] was one of the only guys who sent me a text and said 'mate keep your head up. We know what you're capable of, don't listen to the noise.' So I respect and appreciate him a lot."

and he was the last to leave the paddock, after 1am, still smiling and waving at everyone.

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so with that roller coaster. lets buckle up and head to texas. yee fucking haw.

the 2024 formula 1 silly season and drama master post, part 2 (part 1 here)

Hello and welcome to ah fucking fuck auto caps fuck fuck fuck how do i turn off auto caps AHA there we go okay. take 2

hello and welcome to the great and very insane formula 1 2024 season drama post, part 2. if you are new here or are just looking for part one (which contains the previous 16 (?) races, the off season, pre season testing and everything else, that can be found HERE. (a word to the wise: open it in a browser, not the app, and preferably on a computer to avoid crashing. its fucking long).

what the hell is formula 1? car go fast. fastest cars in the world zoom around tracks at top speeds of over 300kph, piloted by the top 20 drivers in the world. it might not sound dramatic, but oh man. you will Not be disappointed. this post focuses on the drama, the insanity, the sheer what the hell how is this a serious sport. no legitimately. we've just about seen it all this year. grindr, dogs, watersports, ice cream brands, its all here.

the point of this post? to educate, to catalog the insane drama, and to just have a good time. people like to gatekeep this sport, there is also a lot happening. i try to make it easy to understand. again, probably best to start at the beginning of the post because it does a pretty good job of explaining things, which i began way back in january, and can be found HERE (again, shes long, be careful)

and, as usual, if you do not want to see this post EVER AGAIN, block the tag #saph explains silly season 2024

and a second caution, i assume this post will be getting long as well. including this one we have minimum 9 updates left!

anyway, those of you who have been following along the whole time, welcome back! i know we got a little delayed. and i know we’re on a new post, so lets just briefly take a second for me to explain what the fuck happened. first i had an anatomy test, second i work 2 jobs with fuck ass hours, third tumblr decided to stop letting me look at any of my drafts, fourth tumblr support ghosted me about the drafts issue and the post was half saving half not so i just decided fuck it, were going with post 2, electric boogaloo, and fifth, i decided to start typing this instead in a google docs so. many changes. if you're new here i am usually more on top of this.

but here we are. were back on street circuits. we’re in baku, azerbaijan, for the start of the last third of the season. 8 races remain, world championship titles are still within grasp of multiple people. the drama is dramaing. and today is september 22, 2024 and lets fucking go.

first and foremost, on account of the fact that this post is late (again, see above), were going to have to do a bit of a speed run. if you're new here, i promise that this is not representative of my normal dedication to the update post. and for those asking, yeah, ill probably compile it somewhere better than a tumblr post after its all said and done, but we don't have time for that now.

what we do have time for is the Off Week (and like some of the media stuff). and it was filled with silliness:

george russell decided to wear what can only be described as slightly ugly yellow short shorts with his taylor swift shirt that he got at the eras tour. this was baffling for several reasons, the main reason being that i don't think the internet knew that he was capable of wearing a graphic t shirt

fernando alonso got his aston martin valkyrie finally. in case you are unfamiliar, a valkyrie i think is the worlds fastest street legal car. he posted tweets about this that made it seem like he wanted to fuck the car. hilariously, the car broke down an hour later.

we also had the very thrilling conclusion to grill the grid. oscar won and he somehow managed to look more pleased about his grill the grid win than his first race victory.

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nico rosberg went to the green awards and he wore a fantastically insane teal blue suit. yes i know hes not a current driver. but you all like hearing about him so ask and you shall receive. unfornunately i cant find a picture of it though

and also not a current driver is mick schumacher, but my roommate asked me to include that he was seen on his girlfriends instagram being bad at golf. like. exceptionally bad at golf. like he hit a tree 20 feet in front of him.

also playing golf was lando norris. except he managed to look like try bolton from high school musical 2.

he also talked about the world driver championship with his friend max fewtrell while they were playing golf. unfortunately i lost this link in the sea of technical difficulties, but the gist of it was that he was saying that there is still hope for him to beat max in the championship (hes about 60 points behind right now). lando doesnt usually talk about the championship because he doesnt want news outlets to paint him as “desperate” so this was interesting

charles leclerc had an insane off week. first he rear ended someone in monaco. then he spoke at a yacht conference. he was not scheduled to speak at said yacht conference, he was there doing something else and they were like hey you're cool people know you, heres a microphone. he alsp ended up on a weather channel while promoting a karting event he was doing for the jules bianchi foundation (his god father, the one who died during the f1 race in japan 2014). he also changed his instagram pop and re centered it because some random tiktoker told him it matched his aesthetic better.

oscar piastri posted a photo of himself sitting in the cockpit of a plane and then promptly deleted it. because he posted it on 9/11. for anyone who doesnt know what that is, that was when some terrorists hijacked commercial planes and few them into the world trade centers in nyc and the pentagon in washington dc

max verstappen also posted a plane pic with himself and lando norris, but he did not delete it.

we also had the return of daniel ricciardo’s jpg instagram account, which is kinda like a finsta for photos that hes taken. i think lando started this a few years ago.

heading into the race week we certainly got a weird ass batch of pr. including but not limited to:

lewis hamilton was back on top and slaying in the fit game. as was yuki.

lewis hamilton also exposed george russell as listening to katy perry pre race. katy perry and taylor swift (this was after he claimed that he liked listening to old school rap music.) though, lewis then started singing wrecking ball???? confusing vibes all around

george was not off the hook yet tho because some intern definitely make him say skidibidi toilet or whatever the thing is idk, i might be gen z but im not insufferable, okay? actually george in baku was just all kinds of unhinged

george and alex also got up to something, what it is no one knows but it is clearly something

max pulled up to the paddock de aged about 10 years. picture one is of him in baku in 2015 (i believe he was 17) and picture 2 is this year. no i am not kidding.

and franco walked into the paddock telling everyone about argentinian mate (which is a drink, not a friend)

and max shoved a microphone out of the way so everyone could gossip

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then of course, we had some slightly more relevant drama

haas announced that ollie would be replacing kevin at baku. in case you forgot, kevin magnussen received a total of 12 penalty points over the season so far, which means he gets one race ban. how did he get the points? well he was mostly wreaking havoc on everyone else so that his teammate, nico hulkenberg, could drag his car into the points. lets all remember the time in saudi arabia where he managed to get 20 seconds of penalties by basically driving like a mad man just to make sure that nico could keep his position after he pit stopped. anyway, nico was kind of pissed about the race ban situation and said “maybe the guidelines for F1 penalties need to be reviewed as the stewards ‘want to get involved’ no matter the contact.”

in any case though, k mags was out. and ollie was in. we’ve seen ollie before. notably he subbed in for carlos sainz at the saudi arabia gp when carlos had appendicitis. he managed to get points as well. since then, he has been announced as a haas driver for 2025 and is now subbing in for k mags (haas, later in the week called him a super sub. clearly no gen z person read that over.) he can do this because ferrari has a haas engine so they share reserve drivers.

adrian newey finally got employed. i know! i can hardly believe it either! but he did! and youll never guess where!

ferrari? no that would be too obvious.

mercedes? nah

williams? no too much of a shit show

aston martin? ding ding ding! just the right amount of shit show!

that is right. newey is going to aston for 2025.

apparently he was offered a “good package” according to himself, which i assume means pay and also the fact that lawrence stroll made him a shareholder? stakeholder? whatever its called. in the team itself. basically he has a lot of power.

he said that he always wanted to work with fernando and lewis. and he couldn't do both. and aston had a better package than ferrari.

fernando looked positively evil during all the announcement pictures. and called the team "definitely the team of the future" and for those of you who don't know, fernando is positively evil. hes just been stuck in a shit box and we havent seen very much of him, but man does he know how to evilly slut it up. so that will be fun to see.

by contrast, people said that lance was not excited enough. and well. lance 1. has resting bitch face and 2. never really looks excited about anything. also he lives in a world where take your child to work day somehow became his job. (his dad owns the team).

lewis hamilton was asked what he thought about adrian not going to ferrari, and here's what he had to say:

"i feel like, while I have mentioned before that it would be an honor to work with adrian, i have been privileged to work with two championship winning teams that didnt have adrian."

mclaren announced pato o ward would do FP1 in mexico. who is pato o ward? hes one of mclaren’s indycar drivers and one of the f1 reserve drivers. he is incredibly charming and definitely runs his own social media as seen here:

mclaren Also claim they figured out who their number 2 driver is and they claim its oscar. i say they claim because the statements were a lot more complex than that. essentially, according to andrea stella, the priority is to the team first, then lando and then oscar. so they didn't outright say that oscar is the number 2 driver and i am willing to bet real money that this is because mr mark webber, oscars manager, has something in oscars contract that prevents him from being a number 2 driver. this is of course because mark webber was one of the most infamous number 2 drivers in f1 history to none other than menace war criminal sebastian vettel, who in their time as teammates, managed to win 4 back to back world champions. or, top to bottom if you're mrs darbus from high school musical.

lando was asked about this and he said that yes, the team does support him. though he would not expect oscar to give up a win for him and that it is more complex behind the scenes. i suppose we will see if there are any papaya rules coming out this weekend….

and oscar said "i think the main point is its not purely just going to be me pulling over for lando every single race, because thats how none of us, including lando, wont want to go racing, if we feel that someone has done a much better job on a weekend, whichever way it is, we want that person to be rewarded."

max verstappen commented on the mclaren situation as well. which was funny mostly because red bull has one of the most defined number 1 and number 2 drivers of any team. he said "you look at it form oscar's perspective, he is closer to lando than lando to me. they have to deal with that."

and allow me to put on a tin foil hat as we are about to talk about the future of the red bull seat. because all i have to offer here is a baseball hat and a red bull can.

a long time ago we talked about the red bull cans. the ones that red bull makes to promote f1. at the end of last season red bull put max and checo on the red bull can. this season at the start it was just max on the red bull can. well. now checo has reappeared on the cans too. and i will tell you what i think this means. it means that checo is not getting swapped this season, which was a possibility for awhile.

but! there is more!

daniel ricciardo made an instagram post this week. and it was very interesting. but most interestingly he was wearing a red bull hat.

which he does occasionally, no big deal really. he did race for the for several years, he technically does currently. BUT then he showed up TO THE PADDOCK wearing the red bull hat.

which is Big Interesting. usually you show up in a statement outfit or wearing the team kit. and daniel is not a red bull racing driver. he is a visa cashapp racing bulls driver. they might be owned by red bull but they are Not the same team. so why the red bull hat. in the paddock. well, the rumor is that hes taking checos seat for 2025. and the rumor is that this will be announced before mexico. so checo can have a proper send off.

and with that. the baku lore.

theres a lot that has happened at baku. as i said its a street circuit. and i think its the fastest street circuit. but over the years theres been some notable events.

such as the great kimi raikkonen radio for gloves and steering wheel:

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they gave mini kimi this week gloves and steering wheel in honor of that

the max and daniel crash in 2018 when they were running p1 and p2 respectfully

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and of course. how could we forget. charles’s infamous “i am stupid” radio.

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speaking of charles, he crashed again in fp1. not quite in the same spot, but nearly. he took a picture with the marshalls.

then in fp2 he rage quit, basically saying that the car sucks.

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but he was back and better than ever in practice three because he managed to top the time charts. welcome back fuck ass ferrari.

some other teams definitely experienced the lows but not really the highs of baku during practice. like lance stroll who came on the radio to say “this is not a car” (good thing they have adrian newey now, right?

franco colapinto also cut his ear before practice on the neck strengthener stretcher thing that they all use and the team wanted to give him stitches but he was like no no no i need to be in the car in about 5 minutes im not doing that. so he jammed on his helmet and jumped in the car. he also crashed and when he went to the medical center he took off his helmet and there was blood everywhere and they were like no no no you cannot race! and he was like no! this is not from the crash! and then explained it and they let him do qualifying.

also im pretty sure? ollie bearman crashed? in practice? but frankly i don't have time to google it so whos to say.

but alas. qualifying.

i know i know this is kind of a shitty update. i promise ill go all out in singapore. i PROMISE.

so as i said. its a street circuit. high speed. 90 degree corners. and also windy as hell. we also had the dynamic duo of karun and harry in the commentary box.

max led the first practice, george led the second and i think charles led the third. or some order like that.

slipstream here is almost essential (slipstream: going behind another car to reduce the wind drag so you can go faster)

charles has the last three pole positions (first in qualifying) here in baku, but he has never won. by comparison, red bull have never had pole here but they have won.

and franco has never been to baku before.

i think that's all the exposition that we need here.

q1 started with max complaining about his car. “the car is jumping around like crazy on the rear axle” he said. despite this he was sitting in p3.

the mid field battle though….the mid field battle was heating the hell up. mostly because none other than franco colapinto, who if you will remember, has never been to baku before, had split the two ferraris. he was in third for the moment, .109 seconds behind carlos sainz and .159 seconds ahead of charles leclerc. we still had a lot of qualifying left to go, so this was probably not going to stay, but it was still insane. he was pushing insanely hard, nearly kissing the walls. clearly he had learned from his crash in practice.

the two mclarens waited until the very end of q1 to do their final flying push lap, and oscar made it through, but tragedy struck for lando.

lando was in the middle of his last flying lap, time was ticking down, and there was a Very Brief yellow flag on the track. now, according to rules, you cannot complete your flying lap if there is a yellow flag. so lando pitted and was stuck down in 17th and out of qualifying. this would be the first time that he was out in q1 since vegas last year (which if i remember correctly was also not his fault)

now though, of course nothing is ever that cut and dry. people thought that there had been a mis showing of a flag. yellow flag means that a car is stopped on track, white flag means that a car is going slowly on the track. and people thought that there had been a yellow flag shown when it was actually supposed to be a white flag (if there had been a white flag then lando would have been able to keep doing his flying lap) lando himself said that he had no idea what people were talking about because there is a light on the steering wheel that lights up when flags are called and he had a big yellow light. so it was clearly a yellow flag.

if you're concerned about lando being able to pull it out of the bag, id like to point you in the direction of the mexican gp last year where lando qualified 17th and finished 5th. on a track that was hard to overtake on. he can be absolutely insane when he wants to be. worry not gentle reader.

in any case. also out in q1 was daniel ricciardo, valtteri bottas, zhou guanyu and esteban ocon.

and notably, williams, who was on fucking fire this weekend as we already saw, finished q1 with alex albon in second (ahead of oscar) and franco colapinto in 8th. pierre gasly had somehow managed to also get into 4th. and nico hulkenberg was in 7th with ollie bearman in 13th. i told you the mid field battle was heating the hell up.

q2. everyone zoomed straight out of the gate. they didn't want to get lando norris’d. but, speaking of that, if lando managed to get no points in the race and charles managed to win, charles would overtake lando in the drivers championship. mark webber himself told this to charles, who was absolutely baffled.

in any case, charles was kinda suffering right now and that was because he was not getting slipstream from carlos to make his lap faster. meanwhile, carlos seemed to be actively trying to give charles the slipstream because he came on radio to say “he keeps missing the tow”

and amazingly, franco colapinto was 4 tenths AHEAD of alex albon. alex albon who had not been unqualified by his teammate once since the start of 2023. ex red bull driver alex albon. that alex albon.

max topped the times in q2, followed immediately by charles. insanely, fernando alonso managed to drag the aston martin to fifth. and franco was right behind him in 6th. by comparison alex albon was in 10th.

and from q2 we lost ollie bearman, yuki tsunoda (who has never qualified lower than 8th in baku), pierre gasly, nico hulkenberg and lance stroll. so yes, ollie bearman managed to outqualify nico hulkenberg. this is ollies second ever f1 race.

steaming on forward to q3.

we had, for review, in q3 the following:

both ferraris, both red bulls, both mercedes, both WILLIAMS (has not happened since vegas 2023), plus fernando alonso and oscar piastri.

right out the gate it was wild.

“red bull! theyve re found their mojo! or have they!” karun said. red bull were in 5th and 6th and not entirely sucking for the moment.

everyone did one flyer and then came out at the end for a second flyer.

here were the standings:

charles, carlos, oscar, george, checo, max, lewis, alex, franco, fernando

and everyone was making it to the line and all was going smooth until-

wait a second what is that

could it be! alex albon! with the air box fan still on his car! surely not!!!

oh but it was! and harry and karun were like oh wow so unfortunate for williams tisk tisk

meanwhile ted jumped on the radio to Loudly announce to everyone that this was insane and if i have time here i will put the rant he ranted cause it was Fantastic.

and what do you know i have time

so we had 3 minutes left qualifying and everyone was pulling out of the pits for their last flyer when oscar hopped on the radio to say

"the williams still has the air box fan in"

"oh what an error! disaster for williams!" karun and harry said. they speculated if the marshalls could get it or if the session needed to be red flagged. but alex threw the fan off the car.

and then they asked "ted have you ever seen that before?" and ted did not hold back:

"ITS A MASSIVE YELLOW FAN HOW COULD YOU MISS IT???!!! HOW COULD THE MECHANICS MISS IT???? I CANT BELIVE THEY WOULD MAKE SUCH A MISTAKE DOWN AT WILLIAMS! SUCH AN EXPERIENCED BUNCH OF GUYS AND GIRLS! WHAT IS GOING ON AT WILLIAMS OPERATIONALLY? HOW COULD YOU SEND A CAR OUT LIKE THAT?"

alex, obviously, got fined for an unsafe release 5k euros. he also had to throw the fan off to the side and got slightly covered in dry ice. he did not get to the a second flying lap.

franco did tho!

and here were out qualifying results:

p1: charles p2: oscar p3: carlos p4: checo p5: george p6: max p7: lewis p8: fernando p9: franco p10: alex p11: ollie p12: yuki p13: pierre p14: nico p15: lance p16: daniel p17: lando p18: valtteri p19: zhou p20: esteban

oh ho ho but we werent done yet. because pierre gasly got disqualified from qualifying. for failing fuel flow regulations. and lewis was going to have to start from the pit lane for changing his power unit.

everyone, and by everyone i mean oscar max and checo, pretty much said that charles was going to get pole no matter what, they knew this coming in and the best they were trying for was second

onto the race.

notably, this is considered a checo track. this was one of the three races that max did not win last year. because checo won it. its a track that he does well on, evidenced by the fact that he qualified above max in qualifying. so people were expecting big things from him.

and so, we head into lap 1.

charles managed to hang onto the lead. checo passed carlos straight out of the gate for third and max managed to pass george to take fifth. lando had managed to get ahead of nico and up into 13th. notably, franco held onto 8th and ollie was able to hold onto tenth.

someone who was not doing well was lance stroll, who came on the radio saying that he had a puncture. this was from contact with yuki. lance had to pit for fresh tires and was pretty immediately thrown to the back of the grid.

by lap 2 lando had managed to get past daniel and was in 12th, he was trying to get past yuki next, which he managed by lap 3. yuki also lost a spot to nico.

also slaying in the mclaren was oscar, who took fastest lap. then charles took fastest lap.

and lewis hamilton, who had started from the pit lane, was up to 16th. already. somehow. though he was displeased with the tires, sayig that “this tire is pretty bad” over the radio.

yuki meanwhile was clearly having a problem because he had started going very very slowly. thought the pit wall said that he had no problems. this would later turn out to be false but we will indulge them for the time being.

franco was STILL ahead of alex albon on lap 6. STILL.

lando on lap 8 managed to push his way into points positions, overtaking ollie bearman for 10th. though this was where things were about to slow down for him because in front of him were alex, franco and fernando, who were all very close together and would be hard to get past.

george was back in bad luck hell as a plastic bag entered his airbox. will he ever catch a break.

on lap 11 nico hulkenberg finally caught up with ollie bearman and passed him for 11th.

and max’s car was not working. to potentially no one’s surprise. “i have zero bite in the car” he said. and this was probably true because checo was a whole 6.5 seconds ahead of him. insane gap.

several pit stops later that i will not detail out because we simply do not have the time, alex albon ended up in 4th and lando ended up in fifth. and oscar was about to get undercut by checo.

“mojo seems to be back for checo perez” harry said, correctly.

mojo was back for him indeed. and now he was right behind lando.

and if you will recall, according to mclaren themselves, priority at mclaren is the team first, then oscar, then lando. but oscar was ahead of lando. so what did mclaren do?

they asked lando do hold up perez, but not compromise his own race.

remever a long time ago when i said mclaren wouldn't have any internal drama this season? man how i was wrong.

lando managed to hold up perez for around a lap or two before he got past. this was crucial because this was during when oscar was in the pits.

thanks to lando and the power of the papaya rules teamwork, oscar ended up coming out in 4th, only .706s ahead of checo.

mclaren are working together everyone! mclaren are working together!

meanwhile, turns out that yuki did indeed have problems because he retired on lap 17 with a hole in his sidepod from the contact with lance on lap 1. this was now two races in a row where he had had to retire for reasons out of his control.

several more people pitted. and eventually charles was back out in front, oscar was in p2. until he wasn't. no, he didn't dnf. he overtook charles! he was in p1! he popped out of nowhere! nowhere being 2 car lengths back and just flooring it to spring around charles like a little silly slinky! karun called it a “good, fair and robust defense,” which sounds like its descibing notes in wine. but this was not wine. this was the baku gp. and we were only half done.

ollie bearman was defending against lewis hamilton, holding on tightly to 14th place.

charles was still behind oscar and he could not get past, despite the fact that he was still very much in spitting distance. “they are pushing like crazy or they have more grip than us” he said.

carlos got past both lando and alex albon and was up into 4th

this brought max up behind lando. max was on 11 lap old tires and lando was on 24 lap old tires. but lando still defended like hell and managed to hold onto sixth. max was 0.632 seconds behind lando on lap 25 when he said that “my brakes are not working.” this was hardly a surprise. max has hated the car since china.

also experiencing technical difficulties was sir lewis hamilton. he was stuck down in 14th and was first told to do “everything you can do to get the surface temp down” of the tires. he said “im trying” then several laps later on lap 29 he came on the radio to say “are you seeing how i have to drive this thing?” “yes,” bono, his engineer said. “quite effective though.”

max was still half a second behind lando. mclaren faked a pit stop call over the radio to get max to pit. he did not.

but, george russell did manage to pass him. which was “not good for max’s world champion aspirations.”

this was also when ted very bafflingly said that “if i had a sofa in the pit lane i would be jumping up and down on it” im not sure what that was in response to.

meanwhile, ollie was still holding off sir lewis hamilton. and charles was trying to get oscar to pit again by lying over the radio. it was not working.

lando did a pit stop finally and came out a whole 15 second behind max. he was hoping to catch max by the end of the race. but it might be tight. lets go last lap lando.

“lando, imagine andrea on your shoulder saying ‘zero wheel spin’ in every exit,” lando’s race engineer said. if you're confused, everyone else was too.

10 laps to go and here were the order of affairs:

oscar

+.449s charles +1.865s checo +2.989s carlos +16.530s george +1.909s max +11.535s lando +9.715s fernando +2.589s alex +2.451s nico +4.667s franco +1.590s lewis +1.261s ollie +1.791s pierre +9.205s daniel +23.919s esteban +.789s lance +3.862s valtteri +3.631s guanyu

lando was determined. he took fastest lap on lap 43 and was 8.8s behind max

at this point, the leaders were starting to lap the cars in the back. “the back markers are starting to come up,” checo’s engineer said to him. “its going to get messy.”

“hold onto your hats and if you don't have one go get one and hold onto it” harry said. harry would turn out to be correct.

we had the top 3 all running very close to eachother, that was oscar, charles and checo and “welcome to the party carlos sainz!” who was now 1.2 seconds behind checo in the four way battle for the lead.

definitely not leading was lance stroll, who retired on lap 47 with a brake problem.

oscar managed to pull ahead of charles by 1.5 seconds, finally knocking him out of DRS range. so now it was a three way battle for second. and charles had “no rear tires. no rear tires at all.”

and, just like i said he would, lando managed to pass max on lap 49. he was closing the gap slowly in the championship.

“verstappen’s day goes from bad to worse,” harry said. because lando still had fastest lap, so he would score 3 more points than max. which is important if lando wants to beat max in the championship (though i think hes still like 60 points behind)

meanwhile! franco managed to pass nico hulkenberg for 10th! he was in the points!!!! at his second race!!!

but this was short lived because there was a crash! a big smackeroo! between carlos and checo!! checo was mad, carlos didn't know what happened.

what happened was that carlos was trying to pass checo but checo did not move over. it was deemed an equal fault accident. both of them were utterly confused at what happened and apparently spent 20 minutes in the medical center being utterly lost and aparently saying that sometimes this sport sucks. and! contrary to what several people said! checo did not bang on carlos’s helmet after the crash.

the crash actually caused chef's dad to have a heart attack. he is stable now.

and well. this clip of george from the post qualifying interviews definitely didnt age well:

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but! since we were a matter of a few laps from the end, this meant that the rest of the race was finished under a virtual safety car.

which meant

OSCAR PIASTRI WINS THE AZERBAIJAN GP

and george inherited p3!

and on his own merit too! no safety cars, no team orders, no weird shit!

“yes!” he whispered over the radio.

he almost fell getting out of the car, then gave us all the “one moment” hand gesture before properly celebrating.

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he also got driver of the day!

(this was marginally better than george russell, who said over the radio “i cant get any rubber (to pick up on his tires) all im getting is leaves”)

gunther steiner also hosted the post race interviews. which was interesting.

george said that the most difficult part of the race was “driving full gas into a wall of carbon fiber on the penultimate lap…the vsc should have come out sooner”

charles bashed ferrari because they didn't do any high fuel runs in practice.

oscar was entirely pleased. “i managed to overtake and hold onto it for the next 35 laps..one of the better races of my career.” and honestly, oscar winning a race straight after mclaren basically announcing that he was their number 2 driver is nothing short of hilarious.

and! mclaren was now leading the constructors championship by 20 points! for the first time in ten years!!!!

the top three had a moment outside of the car that was filled with baffled:

and oscar's engineer tom got to stand on the podium with him. he usually takes a selfie with oscar after each race he podiums at, but he was too excited to so george took this picture for them

(george also aparently demomished oscar in a game of uno on the plane, immediately humbling him)

george also shielded himself from the champagne on the podium

the cooldown room reacted to the crash in a very straight forward manner:

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and very quickly cause its midnight and the singapore gp starts in 8 hours, the post race, speed ran:

-mark webber told off laura winter for thinking that oscar didn't have good tire management

-alex albon was “super happy, that's a lot of points for us” (williams finished in 7th and 8th). he cut his own interview short when ollie bearman arrived, saying “I can go, im happy to go” and then waving comically.

-williams was so pleased with this result they blasted everyone with champagne. and they overtook alpine in the constructors championship! this was also their best race finish all season

-(and a quick note, if youre going to really blame logan for being that shit of a driver here, please remember that the car he was driving was several rounds of upgrades behind alex's pretty much the entire time he was driving it)

-ollie became the first driver to ever score points in his first two races for two different constructors because the double dnf pushed him up to 10th place. he said that there was not much difference between the haas and the ferrari, the ferrari was just red

-franco continued to charm everyone and flirt with the reporters.

-they interviewed george and lewis and the camera had to be adjusted for george's height. it was comical and resulted in my favorite edit so far of the season (sound on)

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-lando looked pleased and happy for once. he said about holding off checo that “i didn't hold him up i just had to cool my tires a little.” he was delighted to be leading the constructors for the first time in ten years and he defended alex albon saying “i struggled to get past alex for a while, which is common, alex doesnt make mistakes.” he also ratted on max for going to fast during the VSC and said “i didn't complain, facts were stated.” and to sum it all up he said that “im executing things well, i’m very quick…i’m not going to be the happiest guy, but i am never the happiest guy….car is performing well everywhere…some red cars behind us seem to be our biggest competitors right now”

-by comparison george insulted all of pirelli. the tire people. “pretty infuriating that it (the pace) changes this so much….its black magic, people who make the tires don't understand the tires…..for 20 laps we had a car not worthy of points and for 20 laps we had a car fighting for victory and the only difference is the tires.”

-lewis was notably upset after the race and walked through the paddock with his helmet on, not wanting to talk to anyone. but he did talk to franco and ollie and congratulate them on a job well done defending against him and racing against him. franco even fangirled over this on his instagram.

-charles was clearly upset with ferrari. he was so upset he posted a thirst trap.

-and oscar. oscar was very happy this afternoon. and his mom was there! she doesnt usually come cause it scares her, but nicole was there today!

-mclaren celebrated with a hell of a lot of champagne. both oscar’s wina and lando’s insane recovery, and the fact that they were leading the championship. red bull have been dethroned, at least for now.

-there was so much champagne that lando took off his socks to spray it. all seems well at mclaren.

-at least one thing is for sure, oscar had a better time here this weekend than last year when he got food poisoning and only ate four pieces of toast

and with that. we head into singapore. quite literally as it is starting in a few hours. again, i apologixe about this post. its a little sad, but the next one will be better. pinkly promise.

see you all soon!!!

#Instagram #not a tag #from saph #saph explains silly season 2024 #will u work this time idk lets find out #i think i finally fixed it and if not im giving up #good night america

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