#strong dad friend energy
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2023 has truly beaten me within an inch of my life emotionally but in a gotta-crack-a-few-eggs kinda way so I think it was good even if it was bad
#beloved dog died and taught my dad that hes not an island and can ask for support#lost a close friend because she became one of those white 'leftist' women that dates conservative men#and from that learned how to protect my energy in female friendships where i tend to bend over backwards to earn their approval#got my hours cut in half at my steady job which years ago would have put me on a total downward spiral#but got my ass in gear applied for a zillion jobs and actually got one that made me like working again#watched a friend have a really scary experience with drugs and had a full blown public panic attack#expressed to him after that i wasnt judging him and was just really worried for his safety and distressed about everyones nonchalance#and everyone in the friend group stopped doing those drugs#overall i think its been a good year for teaching me that i can be strong and resilient and vulnerable and open all at once#and i dont need to be afraid of caring too much
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Do I have to start saying not that anyone would care in that super duper passive aggressive way to guilt people into caring or what
#dora daily#I’m so tired#the one thing I’ve consistently wanted since I was a kid was to be cared about and seen 😜#yet I can’t even seem to get that ☠️ I honest to god am so tired like every day is another futile attempt to try to engineer what I say#specifically for the purpose of me hoping someone ANYONE would care#how I used to be sick when I was younger because I saw that the kids who would get sick or would get sad would get sm care and love but#I was stupid because I didn’t account for the fact that when I was sick I had to just suck it up or when I was sad I need to stop being such#a crybaby and get over it#what if I say I’ve had enough of just being shamelessly used by others for me to comfort them through their problems#but I always have everything thrown back at my face because somehow when it’s my turn my problems are uncomfortable or awkward#I don’t have energy for a single thing yet I force myself to talk to at least one person and trying to fix my relationship with just#literally talking it shouldn’t be that hard but I feel so worthless that even speech is impossible and makes me feel like I will literally#die. it’s been working kinda but now I just can’t help but feel so sick to my stomach about all this my head hurts really bad and I’m trying#not to cry and trying my hardest to make peace with the fact that in truth nobody will ever like me enough to care at all ever#not my mum not my dad or my siblings and certainly not my friends either#I’m so tired of always begging and pleading for someone to just notice I’m here too#or maybe it’s specific people#it’s so cruel to say all those overly nice things to me and not act on them#why else was I so psychotic about that girl ? obviously because she would shower me with the nicest things I’ve ever heard#but she says that to everyone she’s not consistent with me and we aren’t really friends#ik it wasn’t her intention but it doesn’t change the fact I have wanted to and I’m not even over exaggerating but actually off myself#because this is just proof I’m around to serve people’s dirty work and clean messes when I can’t even stand on my two feet anyways#isn’t it so stupid I’m just talking to myself here and most likely nobody will ever see it meaning this was just useless yet again#and the fact i can’t be free ever nor can i do anything about this to permanently end things because i am a coward and because the worst#part is that even after death I shall be tormented anyways#and let’s say I somehow survive an attempt I will literally be scarred for life and then I’d rlly want to be dead#it’s the way not even death can be a solace for this because there would only be more torture#I can’t leave this religion because leaving won’t change the truth but I’m so tired and worn thin of every single responsibility in my life#even tho I don’t have much the few I do have feel excruciating#life is too much and death is worse so why couldn’t my mum who’s strong willed said no to my dads family and not gotten married period 🧍♀️
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I came out to my dad as bisexual at 14 and I was PANICKED because I had a crush on a guy in my Boy Scout troop and thought I was Going To Hell Forever and he was so kind and understanding of my distress, but he had NO idea what bisexuality was. He just said “yeah but you like girls too? This is normal. Everyone is like this.” And I love my dad and trust him with my life to this day and the idea that the concept of bisexuality had not occurred to him had not occurred to me so I put it off.
By 16 though I had a crush on like THREE boys. Three entire boys in my Boy Scout troop. I felt like my sin was slowly advancing, until like an untreated cancer it had become metastatic. I remember bawling my L’il limp-wristed sissy eyes out in his big rumbly truck on the way home from a scout meeting and him telling me that it was OK, that he still loved me if I was gay, but that he knew I wasn’t gay because I still had crushes on women and that meant I was straight. I didn’t quite know how to explain that those felt *~*different*~* and that I felt like I was losing a fight to evil inside me but I again felt comforted by his reassurances and his genuine fatherly love.
At 18 I was like “hey I’m realizing all my friends are going on missions. I don’t wanna do that. Idk how to say that and I don’t have a ‘good enough’ reason to not wanna go.” So I just put it off. Again, my parents were extremely supportive of the information I gave them (I blamed it on perpetually forgetting to start the paperwork.) and one day my mom texted me that she had done the paperwork for me! And that all I needed was to get a physical! So I did that (it was awkward af tbh, my hernia check was done by a trainee doctor and she spent like 3 minutes fishing around my inguinal canals before her attending rescued me) and was sent to Mexico City where I learned that in addition to dipshit himbos with strong hands and scruffy guys with artistic hearts I was REALLY into chubby Latin men with strong personalities who bullied me a little when I lived in Mexico.
I remember my first companion got annoyed with me during an argument and said we were just gonna wrestle and whoever won the wrestling match won the argument (I stg I am dead serious this happened.) I was like…SWEATING when he tore off his tie and threw his white button-down shirt onto the ground (I won btw, don’t ask me how).
I remember one of my companions with this really intense, almost manic energy telling me that he was gonna make sure I was safe in a new area I didn’t know very well. He cooked breakfast for me and we’d go shopping together on P-Days and in the mornings before breakfast he’d jog around and do pull-ups with his shirt off and I’d do anything but look at him because my face would break out in a sweat so intense he’d think I was crying and come over to see if I was OK and somehow make it worse. He let me play D&D with myself in the evenings even though it was against mission rules because he knew how lonely and stressed I was.
I remember one of my companions was a big chubby man with a loud voice and a great sense of humor. He was kind and direct when addressing conflicts with me, and always bragged about how he knew the secrets of women’s minds and it felt like he really did since it almost always boiled down to “Treat Them Like People and Love Them a Lot. Don’t Stop Being A Person For Them. Also Eat Them Out Sloppy Style.” Our P-Day activities sometimes felt like dates, and it seemed like he was more attentive to my emotional state than I was since he was always the first to suggest we slow down our Divinely Mandated, God-Ordained, Super Sacred Work and Wonder to get a snack or check out a Pawn Shop (I love Pawn Shops).
I remember another companion who asked me to bully him every time he did something against his goal of losing weight. It was like he gave me Carte Blanche to take out my crush on him by being a nuisance and I LOVED that. I remember having a breakdown one day after we’d spent the afternoon frantically cleaning our disgusting-barely-habitable mission house to make it look less vile that it was (not our fault imo?) and I started bawling and he pulled me into a hug and he smelled good and he told me he knew it wasn’t just the house and that I was mad at him for being a Huge Dickhead for about a week (true) and that he would work on it. (He’s also a huge chaser but that’s a separate thing.)
I remember one of my companions waking up early (and our schedule is already built for sleep deprivation) to make me a “birthday cake” from knock-off Nutella and bread. He used matches for candles and woke me up, lit the ‘candles,’ pulled them out, then smashed it in my face and took a bunch of pictures while I was still madrugada and disoriented as fuck. He had the same sense of humor as one of my HS crushes and I could push his buttons pretty easily which was so fun.
I came home from my mission and started back at BYU where I became actively and aggressively suicidal. I had a stalker the year I moved up there and my dad’s solution to that was to get me a gun. I know he wouldn’t have bought me a gun if he could have read my mind, but I had a loaded pistol under my bed during a trifecta faith/sexuality/gender crisis and that was not helpful. I remember that the day I decided to kill myself I figured I’d call the BYU CAPS and see if I could get into therapy because it felt like what I was “supposed to do” so I could check my suicide boxes. My therapist was the guy who’d helped me pick a major the year before and was this drop-dead gorgeous Hawaiian man who cried when I told him how I’d been feeling.
A few weeks into therapy I met another stunning man with soft eyes and a scruffy illegal-at-BYU beard he kept pushing his luck with. He was funny, kind, patient, married, and wouldn’t give me the time of day if he knew I was crushing on him. We were in my history of psych class, which was inarguably the worst psych class I have ever had, and we studied together for every assignment and test and I realized that my feelings for him and for all the men I’d already mentioned were in direct conflict with my faith and relationship with God. My already agonizing spiritual conflict became even more wretched and as a result of this plus some other tightly-packed experiences with Mormonisms bullshit, I left the church.
After leaving the church I decided to move back to AZ and transfer to ASU. My mom helped me get a dog since I think it had started to dawn on my family that my mental health was barely getting me through the day, and she knew that we both loved dogs. Madi made my last year at BYU livable while I got my shit together and transferred. In that last year, I went on a date with quite possibly the only semi-openly-out trans person on BYU campus. It was not a great date imo, I was not doing well, but the person I spoke with was fun and fascinating and talked to me about Gender Dysphoria and it really cemented my need to go. To leave and never come back to that fucking school.
I started at ASU a month after my last semester at BYU and within a very short time frame it felt like I was coming back together, like a puzzle magically putting itself together in an environment that wasn’t slowly draining that puzzle’s will to live.
On the 4th of July, the year I started at ASU, I saw a transition timeline photo of a gorgeous happy beautiful happy radiant happy woman and her former Mormon missionary self and I realized the light that was on in her eyes was the light that was off in mine. I looked into transitioning for 3 days, sleeping about 10 hours total during that time. I started talking to other trans people on Reddit (one of whom is now my beautiful fiancée @cintailed) and after about a month of making preparations to be disowned and kicked out, something I was not sure would happen but was ready to go through to Turn On The Lights, I came out to my family and it was amazing. I started HRT a month after that. I secretly dated some dorky guys for about a year while I applied to grad schools. I got into a great grad school for me and my needs. I got FFS. I did my trainings and classes. Me and my fiancée moved in together after some LDR shenanigans. We’ve lived together now for 4 years of basically marital bliss. We have a cat named Grandmother Esmeralda Weatherwax who bites the hell out of my feet about three times a day. My bi-cycle continues to be part of my life but now it’s not as scary. Baby gays in my life have started to look to me for advice. Idk how this all happened so fast. When the years, months, weeks, days, and hours seems to crawl by so slowly now they are rushing past me so fast it’s almost bewildering. Whereas before I felt like I was living on borrowed time, past my ‘expiration date,’ now it feels like I can Fucking Breathe. I’m training myself to slow down now and it feels worth it to Live In The Moment.
Idk why I wrote this. Idk why these thoughts only seem to come up on Sundays when I’m supposed to be writing my dissertation. Idk why I’m crying rn or why I feel so happy. I’m gonna post this shit then get on with my dissertation I guess. Read more Terry Pratchett and give yourselves the time you need. Get a pet. Talk to someone. Re-examine the events that brought you here. Be gayer. Love y’all 💕
#tgirl swag#worm#mormon#lds church#church of jesus christ of latter day saints#boy scouts#Mormon mission#Mormon missionary#elder#the book of mormon#bisexual#transgender#trans stuff#trans pride#lgbt pride#bi pride#mental health#BYU#pets#my cat#cat#dumb cat#granny weatherwax#terry pratchett
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Name ✨Stellar the Hedgehog✨
Age Varies based on what age I draw her, but let's say 16!
Pronouns She/Her
Basic Description The product of Project Stellar—a secret government operation aiming to perfect Project Shadow—Stellar is a genetic experiment combining the DNA of the Ultimate Life Form and the fastest thing alive. Designed to be a living weapon, Stellar was born in a hidden facility where she would have been raised to be an unstoppable weapon for the military. Thankfully, Shadow the Hedgehog (with help from Rouge the Bat) discovered her existence, destroyed the lab, and rescued her as an infant. Shadow then went on to begrudgingly inform his long-time rival, Sonic the Hedgehog, of their newfound child, seeing as she was technically just as much Sonic's problem as she was Shadow's. From there, the duo (along with help from their friends) raised Stellar as their daughter, sheltering her from the knowledge she was created to be a force of destruction for her masters. Along the way, Sonic and Shadow found themselves truly falling for one another, dissolving the barriers they had placed between one another as rivals, finding new appreciation for each other in their new parental roles.
Stellar herself is a bright, warm-hearted person. She has a strong sense of justice and never shies away from standing up for what is right. She takes after Sonic in personality, always cracking jokes and finding it hard to sit still. Despite this, she inherited Shadow's finesse and ability to plan out her choices, not to mention his abilities to utilize chaos energy. She has a love for figure skating, ballet, and make up (thanks to Auntie Rouge!), but don't let her feminine side fool you, she is not afraid to get her hands dirty! She would love nothing more than to spend her day smashing badniks into the ground with her skates if her dads would let her! Stellar loves both of her parents dearly, but sometimes wishes that they wouldn't be so protective of her. After all, what could they possibly have to be worried about?
Extra ✨Stellar's favorite color is red. ✨Her favorite food is chili dogs. ✨She is bisexual. ✨Her favorite flower is lavender, because it reminds her of home! ✨She learned how to skate from Shadow. ✨She calls Shadow "papa" and Sonic "dad". ✨She desperately wants to make her family and friends proud. ✨Her best friend is Camellia the Cat, the daughter of Blaze and Amy. ✨She loves racing Sonic, but is frustrated he always lets her win. ✨She can be VERY impulsive when angered, much like both of her parents! ✨She is SUPER dense when it comes to romance. She has no idea Camellia has been in love with her since they were little! ✨The inhibitor rings she wears keep her powers under control, but they also prevent her from truly mastering them. ✨Her powers are designed after collapsing stars/black holes. Extremely destructive to both herself and everything around her. ✨She has no awareness to the extent of the latent power inside her.
#my art#character ref#stellar the hedgehog#sonadow#shadonic#sonic the hedgehog#shadow the hedgehog#sonic#shadow#sonic x shadow#shadow x sonic#sonadow fankid#sonadow fanchild#fankid#fanchild#my oc#sonic oc#sonic fandom#sonic art#sonic fanart#sth#emthim rambles#fankid au
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What's A Soulmate? - Part 2
In which you accidentally spend an extra year traveling the globe.
Warnings: Heavy on the mutual pining. JFC you two are down bad for each other. Pairing: Lando Norris x SainzSister!Reader Word count: 3.3k words
Part 1
Master List
July 2020
Austria
“He’s 5 seconds ahead, Mr. Norris. Oh my God, he’s 5 seconds ahead of Lewis!” You murmur, hands clutching at the elbow of Lando’s dad as the Austrian Grand Prix winds down.
“He’s got this, our boy is going to get his first podium of his career.” The pride and confidence in Adam’s voice sends a fresh wave of tears threatening to spill over.
Somehow, your one year stint as your brother’s personal assistant had turned into two when you realized you had fallen in love with the world that you had found yourself in. Carlos had been resistant at first, wanting you to go back to university to get your degree but after a year on the road, you simply hadn’t figured out what it was you wanted to do.
In the end, it had been Lando who had been the one to convince Carlos to agree to one more year traveling with them. University would always be there, he reasoned, and what was the use in sending you away if you didn’t even have an idea of what you wanted to do? Wouldn’t the real world experience you got working with elite athletes all over the world count for something when it was time to settle down and get a real job?
In truth, Lando just hadn’t wanted to lose you. In the year that you had been in his life, the friendship that had blossomed between the two of you was one of Lando’s most important and meaningful relationships that he’d ever had. You could look at Lando and tell that something was off just by a singular tick of his jaw muscle. He could look at you and tell that you were losing your patience at his antics by the way your shoulders bunched up by your ears at the end of the day. So it had been completely selfish when Lando had gone to bat for you, simply because he didn’t want his best friend to leave his side.
It had worked and Carlos had agreed, also not really wanting to lose you as such a fixture in his life as well. You and your brother worked together so well, you anticipating his needs before they were even a thought in his head. If he had his way, you’d spend the rest of your career managing his but he knew your parents would never go for it.
Now, here in Austria, your best friend was one single lap away from landing his first F1 podium. Carlos was running in 5th and the energy in the McLaren garage was simply electric. The mechanics and engineers were all on their feet, waiting for the stewards to give the okay for them to run out to pit lane. You were tucked back in the garage standing next to Lando’s dad, who had traveled to Austria this weekend to see his son’s race.
The checkered flag waves and tears stream down your face you’re so proud of both of your boys. P3 for Lando, P5 for your brother. Lando’s first podium of his career. The enormity of the moment washes over you as you follow Adam out into the pit lane. You watch through misty eyes as Lando pulls his car into parc ferme behind the little cardboard 3 sign. The pride that swells in your chest threatens to overtake any and all other feeling it’s so significant and strong.
Here was the boy that you had spent countless nights consoling after DNFs and poor finishes, leaping out of the car after putting his car on the podium. You follow Lando’s dad over to the barricades, waiting patiently for Lando to get out of the car. His helmet is ripped off in record time as Lando’s eyes search for his team. The entire McLaren garage is there, waiting to celebrate this career best finish with him. Your stomach digs into the metal barricade, the cold steel biting into your bare skin, as you lean forward to catch a better glimpse of your sweaty best friend.
The way your heart tumbles down to your toes when his gaze finds yours sends heat rushing to your cheeks.
“We did it!” Lando crows, throwing his arms around his team.
Adam is next and fresh tears roll down your cheeks at the tender hug that is exchanged between father and son. You’ve spent quite a bit of time with Adam and Lando this weekend and the bond that they share is something that is so special, it’s a blessing to watch.
And then its your turn. The shy smile that flits across your face feels out of place in front of the boy that has your entire heart. “I’m so proud of you.” You murmur, eyes shining up at him, when his arms snake around your neck as he pulls you into a sticky hug.
“Thank you.” He whispers back, lips dusting over your cheek in a very non platonic way that has your heart skittering into your throat. “I couldn’t have done it without you, pretty girl.”
It’s just a quick moment between friends and it’s over before it really means anything to anyone else besides you and Lando but that moment after his first podium is something that you’ll hold on to for years to come. He’s your best friend and nothing more, you try to remind yourself as you watch him complete the rest of his post-race duties. Of course you were proud of him, that wasn’t weird to say. The hug that you shared, the quick peck on the cheek, both were the actions of two people that were practically inseparable but nothing more than friends.
Lando never takes his eyes off of you the entire podium celebration.
Italy
September, 2020
“There is absolutely no fucking way I am getting on the back of that thing with you, Norris.” You stand just outside the McLaren motorhome, hands on your hips, staring at Lando like he’s gone completely insane.
“Oh come on.” He groans, rolling his eyes. “Don’t be such a baby. The fan stage is like a million miles away and we’re going to be late.”
You stared at the electric scooter, one of twenty that had been gifts from Lando’s dad from his new company that had just launched. It was big enough to fit the both of you and was certainly fast enough to get you across the paddock to the fan stage in plenty of time but the idea of you zipping around with Lando Norris of all people piloting the electric scooter had anxiety settling deep in your stomach.
“This is not going to end well.” You grumble. “If you break me, Carlos is going to be very unhappy.”
Lando turns on that megawatt smile he’s known for, aiming it’s full strength right at you, something that you are utterly unable to protect yourself from. “You know I would never hurt you, pretty girl.” He coos, using that nickname that he’s grown so fond of lately.
Which is a problem because you two are supposed to be strictly friends. You knew Lando was a flirt, had seen it in action so many times in the clubs on unsuspecting girls that you had lost count but he never seemed to turn on the charm with you like he did the other girls. Which was totally fine with you because there was no way you would want to get involved with someone you worked so closely with. Despite your close friendship, there was always an element of a professional boundary that you didn’t really want to cross. And Lando seemed like he didn’t want to cross it either.
So, you ignored the swooping stomachs and toothy grins that he aimed your way, telling yourself that it was just because he was your best friend and saw you as the same. Even if he had tried to pursue something, it would have been a bad idea. You couldn’t imagine what you would do without Lando in your life and if a romantic relationship went south between you two, well…that simply wasn’t an option and you would’t even consider the fall out. It made you too anxious.
Throwing your hands up in defeat, you approach the scooter somewhat apprehensively, not missing the way Lando’s grin grew about five sizes when he realized he had won the argument. But he wasn’t just happy that he had won the argument, he was ecstatic that you would now have an excuse to touch him, something that he lived for like a man starved. You never put a toe out of line when it came to your working relationship and Lando tried his best to respect that, not wanting to make you feel uncomfortable in any way. Carlos would have his head and his balls if he ever made his baby sister feel any other way than safe but more than that, he valued your friendship more than anything else. If you wanted to maintain a strict platonic relationship, that was what Lando was going to accept.
Lando is up on the scooter first, one foot braced on the pavement as you gingerly take one step and then another onto the back plank of the machine. Your fingers grip at his waist as you struggle to find your balance. “There you go.” Lando says, kicking off the pavement while engaging the little throttle on the handlebars. “Just hold on, I’ve got you.”
You hate to admit it, but Lando was right: this thing was fun. You two rocket through the paddock, picking your way carefully though the late afternoon crowd. Your arms are tight around his waist as you lean into his strong frame, your safety utterly dependent on the man in front of you.
Lando nearly bins it into Red Bull’s motorhome when you rest your chin on his shoulder, he’s so distracted. The sound of your laughter in his ear combined with the way the tips of your fingers grip at the waistband of his jeans send his senses into overload.
“I hate to admit it, Norris but I think you were right.” You laugh, the whisper of your breath sending a shudder down Lando’s spine. “This thing is kind of fun. Do you think your dad would give me one too?”
Not if Lando had anything to say about it because as far as he was concerned, riding through the paddock on the back of his, arms clinging desperately to his body, was the only way you’d be getting around on one ever again.
October 2020
Portugal
The pulse of the music in the club thrums through you, the alcohol you’ve consumed tonight blurring the edges of your vision in the most comforting way. You’ve been in Portugal for less than 24 hours and you already are in love with the country, having arrived ahead of media day tomorrow.
From your spot on the couches in the VIP section, you watch as Lando approaches, your drink in one hand and his in the other. He had convinced you to come out with a few of the drivers tonight, using the fact that there had been a two week break before this race that you had spent in Spain while he had been in England. It hadn’t taken much to convince you as you had missed Lando during the break, even though you’d never admit as much.
“Thank you, Lan!” You shout over the music when Lando hands you the glass full of vodka and sprite.
“Anytime, pretty girl.” Lando says, slipping into the booth next to you.
The burn of the alcohol slips down your throat as you listen to Charles prattle on beside you about something, focus really on the way Lando’s arm is pressed into your bare one. You had spent the entire break desperate for a break from his presence, the way he consumed most of your thoughts was starting to border on obsessive and you had thought you had done a good job of getting him out of your system.
It only took 3 vodka and sprites for you to realize how wrong you were. This silly little crush had to stop though, you knew that. And if Lando had been aware of your feelings, he probably would have told you the same. He was always flirting with pretty models in the club, enjoying his status as a rich, single, professional athlete. There was no way he’d want to tie himself down to one girl, especially not to someone he probably saw as more of a sister than anything even remotely romantic.
So you took what you could get: his friendship and basking in any and all attention he gave you. You tried to tell yourself that the sudden attention Charles was showing you tonight was a good thing, that you needed to find a distraction to get your mind off of the one person that seemed to wholly consume your every thought.
“Do you want to dance, amor?” Charles murmurs in your ear, fully aware that your brother is sitting less than 20 feet away, watching the exchange with daggers shooting out of his eyes.
Next year, Carlos was leaving McLaren and joining Ferrari but if he kept hitting on his little sister like he was, Charles was going to have some issues with his new teammate.
Grasping at the opportunity to get away from Lando and the model that had appeared out of thin air that was sitting pretty on his lap, you practically leap up out of the booth, following Charles out onto the dance floor. The music pulses sensually around you as Charles brings his hands onto your hips, swaying to the music. With your drink in had, you attempt to lose yourself in the music and the feeling of Charles’ hands on your body, ignoring the fact that it isn’t working.
From his spot at the table, Lando grips his drink so hard he’s surprised the glass doesn’t shatter. The moment you had gotten up from the booth with Charles, he had practically dismissed the girl that had been trying to stick her tongue down his throat in favor of watching you dance instead.
“Everything okay there, Lando?” George asks as he takes the place vacated when Charles and you vacated the booth. “You look a little annoyed.”
Lando shoots his friend a withering look before allowing his gaze to find you and Charles again. “‘M fine.” He grumbles.
“Why don’t you just tell her how you feel?”
Lando swings his head to look at George like he has three heads. “What are you talking about, mate?”
“I see the way you look at her. Everyone does. You two are the worst kept secret on the grid.”
Lando sets his drink down without taking his eyes off of you. “She’s just a friend and my teammates sister. Do you see the way Carlos is glaring at Charles? That would be me on the receiving end of that. No fucking way.”
George just raises an eyebrow at Lando’s protest. “Whatever you say mate.”
December 2020
Bahrain
“Lan, can we talk?” You ask, hands wringing together in front of you.
The harsh lights above you light up the paddock, bathing the darkened desert in a fluorescent glow. You’d been looking for Lando for almost thirty minutes now, somehow losing him after qualifying had concluded an hour before.
Lando instantly clocks the anxiety in your entire body as he exits out of McLaren’s hospitality building, brows knitting together as he approaches you.
“Of course we can. Everything okay?” His heart thumps against his chest at the look of worry playing on your face. He doesn’t miss the way you worry at your lip before you answer him.
“I just…we need to talk.”
Lando grabs your hand, leading you away from the crowd. Even though the activities for the day have concluded, there are still so many people in the paddock and you know this isn’t the ideal place to have this conversation but you know if you don’t have it now, you’ll chicken out. Again.
Lando leads you towards pit lane, knowing that most of the crowds have moved on from the garages and that you’ll find a quiet spot there. The silence that settles between you is not wholly unusual but tonight it feels different. Heavy almost. Lando can feel the bad news coming from a mile away and he suddenly just wants time to stop. Whatever you’re about to tell him is going to be bad, he can feel it deep in his bones.
He finds a bit of pit lane that is deserted, save for a few mechanics chatting away after wrapping up their duties. “You’re making me nervous.” Lando admits as you hop up onto the low wall.
Lando steps between your legs, settling his hands on your hips as he looks up at you. This show of affection isn’t unusual between the two of you but truth be told having him touching you tonight makes what you have to tell him a bit harder.
The words you have to tell him die in your throat as you lose yourself in his eyes for a moment. They’re darker blue gray tonight, the star filled night sky above making them seem like the ocean right before a storm. Which you supposed was appropriate for what you had to say now.
“I’m not coming back next season.” You whisper.
The words hit Lando like a physical blow. “What?” He stutters, fingers digging into the flesh at your hips almost painfully.
Tears threaten to spill at the heartbreak in your best friend's eyes. “All this time spent with you and Carlos these past two years has changed me, given me so much purpose and direction and it’s time I move onto the next step.”
Next step? Move on? Lando’s breath caught in his throat. You couldn’t move on from this. From him. He couldn’t lose you, his best friend in the entire world. You couldn’t leave him. His vision blurs a bit at the news and he’s forced to close his eyes for a moment. Panic races through him, bitter and quick like a snakebite.
“What does that mean?” He grits out, the question coming out more harshly than he intends.
“I’m going to study public relations in New York City in January.” Your voice is small in response to his obvious anger.
Lando’s entire world tilts beneath his feet.
“New York City?” He breathes, eyes shuttering closed to hide from you.
You nod, a single tear slipping down your cheek at the absolute devastation on Lando’s face. You reach up to cradle his face in your hands, needing to touch him right now. “I won’t be gone forever and I’ll be at every race during the summer and all of the North American ones, I promise. It won’t be that bad.” The words tumble from your lips and you’re not entirely sure who you’re trying to convince that it’ll be okay.
Lando’s face crumples as he leans forward, burying his head in the crook of your neck. He wants to ask you to stay. He wants to beg you not to leave him, that he needs you and doesn’t know how he’s going to function without your content presence. He knows he can’t though, he can’t say a single thing. He never would ask that of you because he knows you’d do it in a heart beat. He knows you’d change all of your plans for him if he told you how he felt. How he’s truly felt for damn near two years now. No, your friendship is too precious and your future is too important for him to tell you how head over heels in love he is with you.
So, he keeps quiet and says the most soul crushingly thing he’s ever had to tell you. “I’m going to miss you so fucking much, pretty girl.”
Tag List: @anilovessadbooks, @shelbyteller, @formulaal, @martygraciesversion381, @longhairkoo, @samantha-chicago, @stelena-klayley @dark-night-sky-99 @luckylampzonkland, @chlmtfilms , @inarabee @aykxz98 @forensicheart @cheer-bear-go-vroom @charlesgirl16 @lieutenantchaos
#f1#lando norris#f1 fanfic#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#lando norris x you#lando norris x reader#lando norris imagine
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Summary: You are the first woman to be racing in Formula 1 and you and Max are already best friends. To Jos' dismay.
Song: Me and Your Mama by Childish Gambino
Part 2 - Part 3 Author’s note: CW: sexist comments, domestic violence (not from Max). I'm still salty about Daniel Ricciardo's exit to Formula 1 so I decided to add him a little here. THIS WILL BE A SERIES AND THANK YOU FOR THE 500 FOLLOWERS! Please like, reblog and share this! <3 ALSO IT'S MY BIRTHDAY!
Word count: 10.8k
You are making history as the first woman to compete in Formula 1 with the Red Bull team, stepping in for Sergio Perez.
This groundbreaking achievement not only highlights your talent but also paves the way for future generations of female racers in a sport traditionally dominated by men.
Your personality shines through with a warm and friendly demeanor that makes you incredibly approachable. Colleagues and fans alike find you likable, creating an inviting atmosphere wherever you go.
This charm not only endears you to those around you but also helps foster a supportive environment within the competitive world of racing
Some have affectionately dubbed you the "Mini Honey Badger," a nod to the legendary Daniel Ricciardo. This playful comparison reflects your fierce determination and tenacity on the track, qualities that resonate with fans and fellow racers.
Your unique blend of charisma and competitive spirit is sure to leave a lasting impression in the world of Formula 1.
Luckily, you found yourself paired with one of the most talented drivers in the sport, Max Verstappen.
From the very beginning, you and Max clicked effortlessly, perhaps due to your shared sense of humor or the lighthearted way you both approached life outside of racing.
Max, known for his fierce competitiveness on the track, also had a playful side that drew you in. Whether it was sharing funny anecdotes from your childhood or engaging in friendly banter about each other's driving styles, the connection felt natural and invigorating.
You both understood the pressures of the sport, yet you managed to find joy in the little moments, whether it was a shared laugh over a silly meme or a light-hearted debate about the best racing video games.
This bond not only made your time together enjoyable but also fostered a sense of trust and teamwork that would prove invaluable as the season progressed.
During your initial week in Formula 1, the team was treated to a mix of corny jokes and uproarious laughter, creating an atmosphere that was both fun and relaxed.
It was clear that the camaraderie between you two was something special, and it didn’t take long for everyone to notice. The garage, usually filled with the tension of competition, transformed into a space of joy and lightheartedness.
You and Max would often engage in playful challenges, like who could come up with the worst dad joke or who could impersonate the team’s engineers the best.
These moments not only broke the ice but also helped to build a strong team spirit.
The mechanics and engineers, who often worked long hours under pressure, found themselves smiling more often, and the overall morale of the team improved.
It was as if your infectious energy had a ripple effect, reminding everyone that while racing was serious business, it was also about passion, fun, and the love of the sport.
Christian Horner, the team principal, seemed to recognize this chemistry right away.
He confidently remarked to the media about the dynamic of having a girl and a boy on the same team, suggesting that he had a good feeling about the partnership.
His words resonated with the fans and the media alike, sparking conversations about the evolving landscape of motorsport and the importance of diversity within the sport. It was evident that the two of you were destined to make waves together on and off the track.
Christian’s faith in your partnership only fueled your determination to succeed.
You both knew that the expectations were high, but instead of feeling overwhelmed, you embraced the challenge.
"Joseph, can you give me an update on the gap behind?" you inquired, your voice steady as it crackled through the radio to your race engineer.
The sound of your own heartbeat echoed in your ears, a reminder of the high stakes at play.
"You're looking at a 5-second lead over Norris, Y/N," Joseph Duke responded, his tone calm and focused.
As you navigated the track, the adrenaline surged through your veins, heightening your senses.
The smell of burning rubber and the roar of engines filled the air, but your focus remained solely on the asphalt ahead.
Max was currently leading the race, and you were right on his tail, just a heartbeat away from making a decisive move.
With the world championship points on the line, every second counted, and the team’s strategy was crucial.
"Copy that, Joseph. I’m feeling good about this pace. Should I push to overtake Max?" you asked, weighing your options.
The tension in the air was palpable, and you could almost hear the roar of the crowd in your mind, their cheers and gasps fueling your determination.
You could picture the fans waving flags, the excitement building as the race unfolded.
"Remember, he’s leading the championship, so those points are vital for him," Joseph reminded you, his voice steady and measured.
You took a deep breath, considering the risks and rewards of your next move. The thought of overtaking Max was tantalizing, but the consequences of a miscalculation loomed large.
"Understood. But if I don’t make a move soon, he might pull away," you replied, your mind racing through the possibilities.
You could see the track ahead, the curves and straightaways that could either make or break your race.
"Just keep your head in the game, Y/N. Focus on your lines and stay patient. The opportunity will come," Joseph advised, his experience guiding you through the chaos.
You nodded, even though he couldn’t see you, reminding yourself that patience was key.
As you approached the next turn, you felt the car respond to your every command, the tires gripping the asphalt with precision.
You could see Max’s car just ahead, a flash of blue and white, and the urge to push harder surged within you.
"Alright, I’ll hold back for now, but I’m ready when the moment strikes," you said, determination lacing your words.
The opportunity to seize the grand prix had slipped through your fingers, leaving you with a bittersweet taste of second place as Max celebrated his victory.
It wasn’t that you felt anger towards him; after all, the stakes were high, and the competition was fierce.
You had performed admirably, even outshining Checo this season, and Red Bull was finally back to their P1-P2 glory.
As you stepped out of your car, the adrenaline still coursing through your veins, you spotted Max waiting for you, his helmet off and a look of concern etched on his face.
He rushed over, his expression serious as he enveloped you in a quick hug. “You don’t hate me, do you?” he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.
You couldn’t help but chuckle at the unexpected question. Removing your helmet, you met his gaze with a warm smile. “Of course not! But don’t think I’ll go easy on you next week,” you replied playfully, your competitive spirit igniting once more.
Max’s face lit up with a genuine smile, the tension dissipating. “Mate, I won’t go down that easy!” he shot back, his eyes sparkling with the thrill of rivalry.
As you made your way to celebrate with the team, you noticed the difference in how they treated you compared to Max. While he was hoisted into the air, receiving enthusiastic cheers and bone-crushing hugs, you felt a more cautious approach directed your way.
It was a subtle reminder of the gender dynamics at play in the sport. You brushed it off, focusing instead on the camaraderie and the shared passion that brought you all together.
The post-race atmosphere was electric, filled with the sounds of laughter, clinking glasses, and the occasional shout of joy.
You joined in the celebrations, clapping your hands and cheering for your teammates, but a part of you remained introspective.
You replayed the race in your mind, analyzing every corner, every overtaking maneuver, and every missed opportunity.
The thrill of competition was intoxicating, but so was the desire to prove yourself, not just to the team but to the world.
As the evening unfolded, you found yourself lingering at the periphery of the lively celebration, your gaze fixed on Max as he reveled in the spotlight of his victory.
He was the star of the night, the one everyone clamored to congratulate, while you stood in the shadows, merely the second driver.
Christian approached, giving your shoulder a friendly pat, a gesture of appreciation for your support. Yet, it felt insufficient.
You masked your feelings with a bright smile as you watched Max raise his glass, laughter spilling from his lips as the clock inched toward midnight.
“Goodnight, Max,” you called out, aware that your boyfriend, Jake would be less than pleased if you lingered too long.
“Goodnight, best friend! Did I mention you look lovely tonight?” Max replied, his words slightly slurred as he pulled you into a warm embrace.
You felt your cheeks heat up. “No, you didn’t! Thank you, Max. You look great too!” you managed to say, your heart fluttering at the compliment.
As the night wore on, you exchanged goodbyes with the others, the atmosphere buzzing with joy and celebration.
You decided it was time to head home, opting for a taxi since you had indulged in a few drinks earlier.
Once inside the cab, you leaned back against the seat, reflecting on the evening. The laughter, the cheers, and the way Max had shone like a beacon of success.
It was hard not to feel a twinge of envy, but you pushed it aside, reminding yourself of the bond you shared.
The driver navigated through the city streets, and you pulled out your phone, scrolling through the photos from the night.
There was Max, grinning ear to ear, surrounded by friends, and there you were, a supportive figure in the background.
Just as the car turned, your phone buzzed in your pocket, and you glanced down to see a message from Jake.
“Where are you?” he texted, the words appearing on your screen like a gentle reminder of the warmth waiting for you at home.
You smiled, feeling a rush of affection as you typed back, “Just left the party! On my way home now. Can’t wait to see you!”
The taxi weaved through the city streets, and you could almost picture him waiting for you, perhaps pacing a little, his brow furrowed in that adorable way he did when he was worried.
You could hear his voice in your head, teasing you about how you always took too long to say goodbye, but you knew he loved it just as much as you did.
As the taxi pulled up to your building, you felt a flutter of excitement. You paid the driver and hurried inside, your heart racing with anticipation.
As you stepped into the apartment, a heavy scent of alcohol hit you like a wave, and your heart sank.
The cheerful anticipation you had felt moments before evaporated, replaced by a knot of anxiety in your stomach. You knew Jake had been struggling lately, and the telltale signs of his mood were all around you.
Empty bottles cluttered the coffee table, their labels peeling and faded, remnants of nights spent drowning sorrows that seemed to multiply with each passing day.
Taking a deep breath, you cautiously made your way further inside, hoping to find a glimmer of the warmth you once cherished, a flicker of the love that had once filled this space.
“Hey, babe, I’m home!” you called out, trying to inject some cheer into the atmosphere, but your voice felt small and fragile against the oppressive silence that enveloped the room.
The silence that followed was deafening, and you could feel the tension in the air, thick and suffocating.
Just then, he emerged from the shadows of the living room, his eyes glassy and unfocused, as if he were peering through a fog that had settled deep within him.
“Oh, look who decided to show up,” he sneered, his voice dripping with sarcasm, each word laced with bitterness. “Did you have fun pretending to be normal out there?”
You felt a chill run down your spine as he continued, hurling insults that cut deeper than you wanted to admit.
It was as if he was trying to push you away, to create a chasm between you that felt insurmountable.
And yet, amidst the hurt, you couldn’t help but feel a pang of sympathy for the man you loved, the one who was lost beneath layers of pain and anger.
“Why do you always have to do this?” you asked, your voice trembling slightly, the vulnerability in your tone betraying the strength you wished to project. “I just want to help you.”
He scoffed, dismissing your concern with a wave of his hand, the gesture almost theatrical in its disdain. “Help? You mean control. You think you can just waltz in here and fix everything? You’re just like everyone else, trying to tell me what to do.”
The words stung, and you felt the weight of his accusations pressing down on you, each syllable a reminder of the distance that had grown between you.
“I’m not trying to control you,” you replied softly, “I just want to be there for you. Can’t we talk about this?”
But as you looked into his eyes, you realized that the man you once knew was slipping further away, lost in a haze of his own making.
His gaze, once so full of life and passion, now seemed clouded, distant. It was as if he was peering through a murky window, unable or unwilling to see the vibrant world outside.
You could see the shadows of his struggles etched on his face, the lines of worry and anger deepening with each passing day. It pained you to witness this transformation, to see the light in him dimmed by his own fears and insecurities.
“Why can’t you see that I’m trying to help?” you pressed, your heart racing as desperation crept into your voice. “I’m not your enemy. I want to understand what you’re going through.”
You took a tentative step closer, hoping to bridge the gap that felt insurmountable.
But he recoiled slightly, as if your words were a physical blow, and the distance between you felt more pronounced than ever.
“Understand?” he scoffed, his tone laced with bitterness. “You think you can just waltz in and understand? You have no idea what it’s like to feel trapped, to have every choice taken from you. You don’t know the weight of this burden.”
His voice cracked, revealing a flicker of vulnerability beneath the bravado.
As soon as you opened your mouth to speak, Jake brushed by you, grabbing his coat and shoes in one swift motion.
"I'm heading out for a walk. Don't even think about following me," he snapped, his words laced with the sting of alcohol.
You simply nodded, feeling a mix of concern and frustration, but you stayed rooted in place until you heard the door slam shut behind him.
With the sound echoing in the silence, you finally exhaled, the tension in your chest easing just a bit. You glanced around the room, the remnants of the night scattered everywhere—empty bottles and crumpled napkins littered the floor.
"Guess it's cleanup time," you muttered to yourself, bending down to gather the bottles. As you worked, your mind raced with thoughts of him.
Just then, your phone buzzed on the table. It was a message from your best friend, Sarah.
"Hey! How's everything? You okay?"
You sighed, typing back quickly. "Not great. He just stormed out after a fight. I’m cleaning up the mess now."
A moment later, your phone chimed again. "Want me to come over? I can help."
You hesitated, glancing at the door. "No, it’s fine. I just need to sort things out."
"Are you sure? You shouldn’t be alone right now."
You paused, considering her words. "I’ll be okay. I just need to think."
As you continued to tidy up, you replayed the argument in your mind. It had started over something trivial, but the alcohol had turned it into a full-blown fight.
You could hear his voice in your head, the way he had raised his tone, the way he had dismissed your feelings.
"Why does he always do this?" you whispered to yourself, frustration bubbling up again.
You were well aware that he wouldn’t be returning anytime soon.
After tidying up the house, you decided to treat yourself to a long, relaxing bath.
The warm water enveloped you, washing away the day’s worries. Once you felt refreshed, you slipped into your favorite pajamas and crawled into bed, the soft sheets providing a comforting embrace.
He hadn’t always been this way—filled with anger and lost in the depths of alcoholism.
You both had shared a beautiful love story, starting as high school sweethearts. You could still remember the way he used to look at you, his eyes sparkling with affection, mirroring the love you felt for him.
As you lay there, memories flooded your mind. You recalled the laughter, the late-night talks, and the dreams you had built together. But now, those dreams felt like distant echoes, overshadowed by the weight of his struggles.
Maybe it was the pressure of work that was taking a toll on him. You thought back to the last time you had a heart-to-heart.
“Do you remember when we used to talk about our future?” you had asked him one evening, the two of you sitting on the porch, the sun setting in a blaze of colors.
He had sighed, running a hand through his hair. “Yeah, I remember. It feels like a lifetime ago.”
“Things can get better, you know. We can work through this together,” you had urged, your heart aching for the man you once knew.
He had looked away, his expression clouded. “I don’t know if I can. Sometimes it feels like I’m drowning, and I don’t know how to swim anymore.”
You had reached for his hand, squeezing it gently. “You’re not alone in this. I’m here for you, always.”
But as the days turned into weeks, the distance between you grew. The man you loved was slipping away, replaced by someone you barely recognized.
Now, lying in bed, you couldn’t help but wonder if he would ever find his way back to you. Would he remember the love you once shared? Would he fight against the demons that haunted him?
With a heavy heart, you closed your eyes, hoping that tomorrow would bring a glimmer of hope, a sign that the man you loved was still inside, waiting to break free.
As you settled into bed, the glow of your phone screen illuminated the dark room, revealing a flurry of notifications that had accumulated while you were winding down.
Most of them were filled with excitement, congratulating you on your impressive second-place finish in the race. However, amidst the sea of cheerful messages, one stood out—a private note from Max.
While some comments stung with negativity, suggesting you didn’t belong in the world of Formula 1, Max’s message was a beacon of warmth.
“Thanks for coming to celebrate with me 👍,” it read, and a smile crept across your face, momentarily pushing away the weight of the harsh words.
You felt a mix of emotions swirling within you, and for a moment, tears threatened to spill over. But instead of succumbing to the sadness, you decided to respond to Max.
Your fingers danced over the screen as you typed, “I wouldn’t have missed it for the world, you deserved it! 😁” The moment you hit send, a sense of relief washed over you.
It was a reminder that amidst the criticism, there were still those who appreciated your presence and celebrated your achievements.
You could almost hear Max’s laughter echoing in your mind, a sound that always seemed to lift your spirits.
Just as you were about to put your phone down, a new message popped up from Max. “You really made the night special! I’m glad you were there. Let’s catch up soon?”
His words filled you with warmth, and you could picture him grinning with alcohol still in his system, his eyes sparkling with enthusiasm.
“Absolutely! I’d love to,” you replied, feeling a renewed sense of purpose.
After setting your phone aside for the night, you drifted off to sleep, the soft hum of the world outside fading into a distant memory.
When you awoke, you were enveloped in a warm embrace, the kind that felt like home. Instantly, you recognized the familiar presence of Jake, his body radiating warmth against yours.
The scent of alcohol lingered in the air, a reminder of his previous night out with friends, a detail that both amused and concerned you.
A smile crept across your face as you turned to see him, his features relaxed and serene, a stark contrast to the tension that had marked his demeanor the night before.
Curiosity sparked within you, igniting a flurry of questions as you pondered where he had spent his time, what stories he might have to share, and whether the night had been as wild as you imagined.
You felt a rush of affection for him, a desire to know every detail of his adventures, to understand the man who had captured your heart so completely.
Despite the warnings from your friends urging you to reconsider your relationship, your feelings for him remained steadfast, unwavering like a lighthouse in a storm.
They claimed he was a source of trouble, a tempest that could jeopardize your career and stir up scandals that would ripple through your life.
Yet, deep down, you understood him better than they did, seeing the layers of his character that they overlooked. You believed in his integrity, in the goodness that lay beneath the surface, and you knew he wouldn’t intentionally cause chaos in your life.
Their concerns echoed in your mind, but they felt distant, like the sound of waves crashing against a far-off shore.
You were determined to forge your own path, to trust your instincts, and to embrace the love that had blossomed between you, even if it meant standing alone against the tide of skepticism.
Although your relationship was already in the public eye, with whispers and speculation swirling around you like autumn leaves caught in a gust of wind, he had yet to join you in the paddock due to his work commitments.
You felt a mix of anticipation and longing, a bittersweet ache in your chest as you navigated the bustling environment without him by your side.
As you glanced at your phone, the screen illuminated the early morning hour, signaling it was time for your daily jog.
You carefully extricated yourself from Jake's embrace, trying not to disturb his peaceful slumber.
Just as you were about to tiptoe out of the room, you caught a faint mumble escaping his lips, a mix of sleep and concern. “Where are you going?” he murmured, his voice thick with drowsiness.
You paused for a moment, torn between the urge to reassure him and the need to stick to your routine.
“I’m just going for a quick run, love. I’ll be back before you know it,” you replied softly, hoping to ease any lingering worries. His brow furrowed slightly, even in his sleep, as if he sensed your departure was more than just a morning ritual.
“You always run too early… what if someone sees you?” he muttered, a hint of jealousy creeping into his voice, even in his dreams.
With a gentle smile, you leaned down to plant a quick kiss on his forehead. “I’ll be fine, I promise. It’s just me and the open road. You know I love my morning jogs.”
You could feel the tension in the air, a familiar weight that often accompanied your outings. “Okay,” he finally said, though the uncertainty lingered in his tone.
You quickly changed into your jogging attire before stepping out of the house. With a sense of urgency, you slipped into your comfortable workout gear, ready to embrace the fresh air outside.
The fabric of your favorite moisture-wicking shirt clung to your skin, and the soft elastic of your running shorts felt familiar and reassuring.
You laced up your well-worn sneakers, the soles still resilient from countless miles, and took a moment to stretch your legs, feeling the anticipation build within you.
Once dressed, you felt the excitement of the run ahead, eager to hit the pavement and enjoy the rhythm of your feet against the ground.
The world outside beckoned, vibrant and alive, as you opened the door and stepped into the crisp morning air. The scent of dew-kissed grass and blooming flowers filled your lungs, invigorating your spirit.
You took a deep breath, letting the coolness wash over you, and with a quick glance at the sky, you noted the sun just beginning to rise, casting a golden hue across the horizon.
As you began to jog, the familiar cadence of your heartbeat matched the steady thump of your feet on the pavement. Each stride felt liberating, a release from the confines of the day-to-day.
You could feel the tension of the week melting away with every step, replaced by a sense of freedom and clarity.
The rhythmic sound of your breath mingled with the rustle of leaves and the distant chirping of birds, creating a symphony of nature that accompanied you on your journey.
As you were enjoying your morning jog through the park, the rhythmic sound of your feet hitting the pavement was suddenly interrupted by a group of enthusiastic voices.
A cluster of women and girls approached you, their faces lighting up with excitement. "Excuse me! Miss Y/N! Can we get your autograph?" one of them exclaimed, her eyes sparkling with admiration.
You paused, a bit surprised but also flattered, and smiled at the eager crowd. "Of course! I’d be happy to," you replied, pulling out a small notepad from your pocket.
Amid the chatter, a young girl stepped forward, her cheeks flushed with excitement. "I want to start go-karting because I want to be just like you!" she declared, her voice filled with determination.
You could see the passion in her eyes, and it warmed your heart. "That’s amazing! Go-karting is such a fun sport," you encouraged her. "What do you love most about it?"
The girl beamed, her confidence growing as she shared her dreams of racing and the thrill of speed. "I love the idea of being in control and going fast! It looks so cool!"
You nodded, feeling a sense of responsibility to inspire her. "You know, every champion starts somewhere. If you really want to do it, just keep practicing and never give up. Surround yourself with people who support you, and you’ll go far," you advised, hoping to instill a sense of belief in her.
The girl’s eyes widened, and she nodded vigorously. "I will! Thank you so much!"
As the group dispersed, you felt a renewed sense of purpose, realizing that your journey could inspire others to chase their dreams, just as you had. . . .
As the days rolled on, the team decided to spice things up a bit before race week by organizing a fun game called "How Well Do You Know Each Other."
The idea was to not only entertain the fans but also to give everyone a glimpse into the camaraderie between you and Max.
You found yourself standing in front of the camera, a mix of excitement and nerves bubbling inside you, while Max lounged comfortably on the sofa behind you, his headphones snugly in place, unable to listen in.
The staff kicked off the game with a playful tone, "Alright, let’s start with you! The first question about Max is… what is Max's favorite food?" You grinned, confident in your knowledge of your teammate.
"Oh, I know this one! Max is a huge fan of both Italian and Dutch cuisine, while I personally lean more towards Spanish dishes," you replied, your voice filled with enthusiasm.
The crew chuckled, clearly enjoying the banter, and you could see Max nodding in agreement, a smirk on his face even though he didn't know what you said.
After a few more questions, it was time for the roles to reverse. You took a seat on the sofa, and Max stood in front of the camera, a playful glint in his eyes.
The staff asked him the same question, and he leaned forward, a teasing smile forming. "Well, I know my teammate pretty well! She loves her Spanish food, but I think she secretly wishes she could cook like an Italian chef," he joked.
"You better be getting this right, I wanna beat Charles and Carlos' record," you said, feeling the competitive in you to beat Ferrari's record of 18 out of 20 right.
Max only turned around and gave an okay sign since you couldn't hear him, adding a little small wink for the tease but it was caught on camera.
In the end, both you and Max aced all the questions, and the excitement bubbled over as you jumped up and down, your energy infectious. Max stood nearby, a wide grin spreading across his face as he watched your enthusiasm.
"See, everyone! Red Bull is clearly the superior team compared to Ferrari, so make sure to support us this week!" you exclaimed, wrapping up the video with a flourish.
As you turned to Max, you noticed he was still gazing at you, lost in thought. It took you by surprise.
"Max, do you want to add anything to what I just said?" you asked, a playful grin on your face as you nudged his shoulder gently.
Snapping back to reality, Max turned to the camera, a hint of sheepishness in his expression.
"Oh, umm, yeah… Red Bull domination, I guess?" he replied, his voice a mix of uncertainty and enthusiasm.
You couldn't help but burst into laughter at his response, and Max's smile widened, clearly pleased that he could make you laugh.
"Alright, everyone, that's a wrap! We'll catch you all soon. Fingers crossed for another P1-P2 finish, but maybe next time we can switch things up a bit," you said, waving enthusiastically at the camera.
As the camera clicked off, you turned to the crew with a warm smile, expressing your gratitude for their support. You shifted your focus to Max, who was standing nearby, a mix of anticipation and amusement on his face.
"Hey, Max," you began, a playful glint in your eye. "How does it feel to be the most compatible drivers on the grid?"
Max's eyes widened slightly at the phrase "most compatible," and you could see a hint of color rising to his cheeks. But as soon as he processed the word "driver," his expression shifted to one of mild disappointment.
"It feels nice, I guess," he replied, a smirk creeping onto his lips. "Just another thing to brag about to Lando, right?"
You chuckled, knowing how much Max loved to tease his fellow drivers. "Oh, absolutely! I can already picture it—Lando rolling his eyes while you go on about how you and I are the ultimate duo."
Max laughed, shaking his head. "He'll probably come up with some ridiculous comeback, like how he’s the best driver in the world or something."
"Well, he does have a knack for that," you said, leaning against the wall, enjoying the banter. "But let’s be honest, you two are like an old married couple. Always bickering but secretly caring for each other."
Max rolled his eyes dramatically. "Please, I’m not ready for that kind of commitment. I can barely handle my own sleeping schedule!"
Max shrugged, a hint of humility creeping into his demeanor. "But honestly, having you around makes it easier. You bring a different energy to the team."
You felt a warmth spread through you at his words. "Thanks, Max. That means a lot coming from you. I think we balance each other out pretty well."
He nodded, his expression thoughtful. "Yeah, it’s like we have this unspoken understanding. You know when to push me and when to let me breathe. It’s refreshing."
"Exactly! And it’s not just about racing; it’s about the camaraderie we build off the track too. Those late-night strategy sessions and the random moments of laughter—they all add up."
Max chuckled, recalling a particularly ridiculous moment from a previous race weekend. "Remember that time we got lost trying to find the catering tent? We ended up in that random fan zone instead!"
You burst out laughing, the memory flooding back. "Oh my god, yes! And those fans were so excited to see us, they thought we were there for a meet-and-greet! We ended up taking selfies with them for an hour."
"Right? And then we finally found the catering tent, only to discover they were out of your favorite pasta!" Max added, shaking his head in disbelief.
"That was a tragedy," you said, feigning a dramatic sigh. "But it turned into one of the best days. I wouldn’t trade those moments for anything."
Max’s gaze softened as he looked at you, a genuine smile breaking through. "Me neither. It’s those little things that make all the hard work worth it."
You both stood in comfortable silence for a moment, the camaraderie between you palpable. The atmosphere around the paddock buzzed with activity, but in that moment, it felt like you were in your own little world.
"Alright, enough of the mushy stuff," Max said, breaking the moment with a playful nudge. "Let’s get back to business. We’ve got a race to prepare for, and I can’t let you steal all my glory."
You laughed, shaking your head. "Oh, please! You know I’m just here to make you look good. Besides, I wouldn’t dream of overshadowing the reigning champion."
What you two didn't know was that the cameras didn't stop but recorded your little moment, which went viral in the few minutes that it was posted. . . . .
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You knew that the public would start shipping you and Max together sooner or later but you weren't bothered with it.
You had a boyfriend who you cared for deeply, someone who had been your rock through the ups and downs of your racing career. Yet, his reaction to the swirling rumors about you and Max took you by surprise.
You never imagined he would be so affected by the gossip that seemed to spread like wildfire through the paddock and beyond.
Here you were, caught in a web of emotions, torn between the thrill of a new chapter and the loyalty you felt towards your current relationship.
As you stepped through the door of your home, the familiar scent of your shared space enveloped you, but it did little to ease the tension that hung in the air.
You found Jake lounging on the couch, his eyes glued to his phone, the glow of the screen illuminating his furrowed brow. The atmosphere was thick with unspoken words, and you could sense that something was off.
“Hey, babe,” you greeted him, trying to sound cheerful despite the weight on your shoulders. He barely looked up, his fingers scrolling furiously, as if searching for answers in the digital chaos.
“Did you hear about you and Max?” he finally snapped, his voice laced with irritation, cutting through the silence like a knife. “It’s all over social media. Are you really going to let this get to you?”
You felt your heart sink; you had hoped for a different reaction, one that would reassure you that your relationship was strong enough to withstand the storm of rumors.
“Come on, it’s just rumors,” you replied, trying to keep your voice steady, though the tremor in it betrayed your inner turmoil. “You know I’m committed to only you.”
You watched as he shot you a skeptical glance, his jealousy bubbling to the surface like a volcano ready to erupt. “Yeah, but how can I trust you when you’re out there with him all the time? It’s not just a coincidence that everyone is talking about it.”
The words stung, and you took a deep breath. "Babe I love only you-"
"Please, don’t even think about it! You know I’m stuck here because if I walked away, your fans would make my life a living nightmare," Jake exclaimed, his voice laced with frustration.
The words hit you like a punch to the gut, leaving you reeling from the harsh reality of your situation.
It was as if he had taken a knife and twisted it, exposing the raw vulnerability you had tried so hard to hide.
You could feel the sting of tears welling up in your eyes, but you fought to keep them at bay. "I didn’t ask for any of this," you replied, your voice trembling slightly.
The weight of his words hung heavily in the air, and you could sense the tension between you growing thicker by the second. It was a battle of emotions, and you were losing ground.
He sighed, running a hand through his hair in frustration. "I know it’s not fair, but you have to understand the pressure I’m under. It’s not just about us; it’s about my career, my fans. I can’t let them down."
His eyes softened for a moment, revealing a glimpse of the man you fell in love with.
"But I don’t want to lose you. Can’t we find a way to make this work?" You pleaded.
"I don't know," he muttered, not lifting his eyes from his phone before standing up and walking past you to get his coat and shoes. "i'm gonna take a walk,"
This has been a pattern for weeks now. You would come home, he would start an argument then make up an excuse to leave the house, leaving you to either pick up his mess or go to sleep without your partner. To only wake up with him cuddling you in the morning and apologise for his action last night.
You were getting sick of it but you still love him too much to break up with him. . . .
The days that followed were a blur of introspection and emotional turmoil. Each time you caught a glimpse of Jake’s name on your phone, a knot formed in your stomach.
You had always been the type to see the good in people, to believe that love could conquer all, but the reality of your situation was becoming harder to ignore.
The moments of tenderness were overshadowed by the growing unease that settled in your chest like a heavy stone.
You spent more time with Sarah, who seemed to sense your internal struggle. She filled your days with laughter and distraction, taking you out for coffee, long walks in the park, and movie marathons that kept your mind off the impending decision.
Yet, no matter how much you tried to push it aside, the thought of Jake lingered like a shadow, reminding you of the grip he had on your heart—and not in a way that felt safe or loving.
One evening, as you and Sarah sat on the balcony watching the sunset, the sky painted in hues of orange and pink, she turned to you again.
"Y/N, I know it’s hard, but you have to prioritize your happiness. You can’t keep living in this limbo," she said, her voice steady and unwavering.
You looked out at the horizon, the beauty of the moment contrasting sharply with the turmoil inside you.
"I know," you replied, your voice thick with emotion. "But what if I’m wrong? What if he really can change?"
The fear of making the wrong choice loomed large, a specter that haunted your thoughts.
"Change is possible, but it has to come from him, not from you hoping for it," Sarah said gently. "You can’t be the one to fix him. You’re not responsible for his happiness or his growth. You deserve to be with someone who respects you and makes you feel safe."
Her words struck a chord deep within you. You thought back to the last time he had gripped your arm, the way his eyes had darkened, and how you had brushed it off as a moment of frustration.
But now, in the light of day, you could see it for what it was—a warning sign that you had been too afraid to acknowledge.
That night, as you lay in bed, the silence of your room felt deafening. You replayed every moment of your relationship, the good and the bad, and slowly, the scales began to tip.
The holiday seemed to fly by in the blink of an eye, and soon you found yourself stepping into the paddock alongside Sarah and Jake.
As you walked, you could feel the tension in the air; Jake wore a strained smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes, gripping your hand a little too tightly.
“Hey, look at all the fans!” you exclaimed, trying to lighten the mood as you waved enthusiastically at the crowd, signing autographs for those who called out your name.
Sarah, taking a break from her hectic job, had decided to join you, her laughter ringing out like music amidst the bustling atmosphere.
“Isn’t this amazing?” you said, glancing at Sarah, who was snapping pictures with her phone. “I can’t believe how many people came out today!”
She nodded, her eyes sparkling with excitement. “It’s like a mini-celebration! But where’s your boyfriend? He seems a bit off today.”
You shrugged, trying to brush off the concern. “I don’t know, maybe he’s just tired. We haven’t really talked much since we got back.”
You stole a glance at him, who was still smiling, but it felt forced, like he was putting on a show for everyone around.
You made the decision to invite Jake into your driver’s room for a heart-to-heart conversation. As you settled into the familiar space, you turned to him with a gentle concern.
“Hey, are you doing okay?” you asked, your voice soft and inviting.
Jake looked at you, his expression a mix of regret and longing, as he wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you closer. “I’m alright, really. I’m sorry for how I’ve been acting lately,” he replied, his tone sincere.
In that moment, you felt a rush of warmth; you had missed the comfort of his touch more than you realized.
“Jake, I need to let you know that I have to leave soon,” you murmured, trying to keep the conversation grounded. But he seemed lost in his own thoughts, his gaze intense and filled with desire.
“Why don’t you just quit your job already? I can take care of you, I promise,” he suggested, his voice dripping with temptation.
The idea hung in the air between you, and for a fleeting moment, you felt the pull of his offer.
It was tempting, but the passion you had for Formula 1 was a flame that burned too brightly to extinguish for anyone, even someone as captivating as Jake.
You took a deep breath, weighing your options. “Jake, you know how much this means to me. Formula 1 isn’t just a job; it’s my dream,” you replied, your heart heavy with the conflict.
He stepped back slightly, his expression shifting from desire to disappointment. “I get it, but can’t you see how much I care about you? I want us to be together, and I thought you felt the same way,” he said, frustration creeping into his voice.
You could see the struggle in his eyes, and it pained you to know that your passion for racing was creating a rift between you.
“I do care about you, but I can’t just walk away from everything I’ve worked for,” you insisted, hoping he would understand.
As you stand there, the tension weighs heavily in the air, palpable and thick, as Jake's frustration spills over, his voice tinged with a mix of hurt and desperation.
"But what about me?" he asks, his eyes searching yours for an answer that you know is difficult to provide. "Since you started this job, we haven’t done anything together. All you've been doing is hanging out with that Max boy. Don’t you see it?"
His words cut through the silence, piercing the surface of your mind and forcing you to confront the tangled web of your life that feels all too overwhelming at this moment.
As you gather your thoughts, aware that the job has transformed your priorities and the once-familiar relationship with Jake has shifted, you attempt to articulate your feelings, to bridge the widening chasm of misunderstanding.
"Jake—" you start, your voice tremulous, hoping to weave a delicate thread of connection that can pull you both back to a place of understanding, but he interjects, the intensity of his emotions propelling him forward before you can offer your perspective.
"I’ll show you—don't worry," he mutters, the frustration lacing his tone beginning to dissipate as he suddenly wraps his arms around you, pulling you close in a gesture that is both protective and possessive.
The warmth of his body against yours sends a shiver down your spine, a reminder of the bond you once cherished.
Feeling the urgency of the moment, his lips find yours, a kiss that ignites a flicker of hope amid the turmoil of doubt and fear swirling around you. . . .
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After the holiday break, you had started to act differently, almost as if a shadow had fallen over their usual camaraderie.
Whenever he approached to nudge her shoulder playfully, she would flinch, a look of surprise crossing her face as if she were bracing for something unpleasant.
It was a stark contrast to the easygoing banter they once shared, and he couldn't help but notice how she had become more withdrawn, often lost in her thoughts, her laughter replaced by a distant gaze.
He believed you were feeling down because the team was struggling to achieve the results they had hoped for.
Typically, his father would reach out to him after a disappointing race, sometimes even resorting to physical punishment if the outcome was particularly disheartening.
It was a routine he had come to accept, thinking it was a common experience shared by many.
However, everything changed when his therapist pointed out that not everyone endured such treatment, which sparked a rebellion within him against his father's harsh ways.
"Why do you always have to be so hard on me?" he had shouted one evening, frustration boiling over.
His father, taken aback, responded with a stern look, "Because I want you to be the best, Max. You need to learn that life isn’t always fair."
But Max felt differently; he wanted to be supported, not punished.
As he pondered your situation, he couldn't help but wonder if you had faced similar challenges.
"Do you have someone in your life who treats you badly?" he asked cautiously, trying to gauge your response.
Your eyes widened at the sudden question before you shook your head, a small smile breaking through the clouds of doubt.
"No, not like that. Everyone is really supportive of me these days."
Max felt a wave of relief wash over him, grateful that you had not been in that cycle of abuse he had been so familiar with.
In many of the recent races, both you and Max found yourselves finishing in the P2 to P4 range, or sometimes not making it to the podium at all, which left the team feeling quite disheartened.
The once-promising season had turned into a series of missed opportunities, and the weight of expectations began to take its toll on everyone involved.
The atmosphere in the garage was thick with tension, and the engineers were working overtime to analyze data and strategize for the next race, but the results were still falling short of what the team had hoped for.
This situation also prompted Max's father, Jos, to plan a visit during the race weekend. He intended to check in on his son and perhaps give him a much-needed reality check, quite literally.
As the race day approached, Jos observed his son engaging in cheerful conversation with you, rather than focusing on the engineers to gather crucial insights, a routine Max typically adhered to before a race.
This deviation from his usual pre-race preparation did not sit well with Jos.
He had always believed that the hours leading up to a race were critical for mental conditioning and strategy formulation. To see Max laughing and joking instead of poring over telemetry data or discussing race strategies with the engineers was concerning for him.
Jos's frustration grew as he watched the interaction unfold. He believed that your presence was a distraction, pulling Max away from the intense focus required for peak performance.
In his eyes, the bond you shared with his son was undermining Max's potential to excel on the track.
He felt that friendships weren't important and they should not come at the expense of Max's dedication to his craft.
Jos was determined to address this issue head-on, convinced that a serious conversation was necessary to realign Max's priorities. . . . .
In the midst of a lively discussion filled with laughter and camaraderie, Jos abruptly interjected, "Max, I need to talk to you right now."
His tone cut through the jovial atmosphere, drawing the attention of both you and his son. The laughter faded, replaced by a sudden stillness as everyone turned to witness the unfolding scene.
Max's expression shifted from joy to disappointment as he glanced at you, yet he managed to offer a reassuring smile before reluctantly following his father away from the group.
"Yes, Father?" Max responded in Dutch, his voice tinged with curiosity and a hint of apprehension. The way he spoke suggested a mix of respect and wariness, as if he were bracing himself for a conversation he knew would be anything but easy.
Jos wasted no time in launching into his concerns, his words spilling out with a sense of urgency.
"You must distance yourself from that girl; she is a distraction that will hinder your performance in the race," he asserted, his tone firm and authoritative, as if he were delivering a decree rather than a request.
The weight of his words hung heavily in the air, a stark contrast to the lightheartedness that had just moments ago enveloped the gathering.
Max, however, was quick to defend you, his loyalty evident in the way he stood a little taller, his brow furrowing in determination. "No, she doesn't distract me, Father. She's my teammate," he stated, his voice steady and resolute.
The conviction in his tone reflected a bond that transcended mere friendship; it was a partnership built on shared goals and mutual respect.
Yet, as he spoke, the tension between father and son thickened, a palpable clash of wills that seemed to reverberate through the quiet space around them.
Jos, sensing the resistance in Max's voice, shifted his approach, employing subtle manipulation to sway his son’s perspective.
"Think about your future, Max. You have so much potential, and I only want what is best for you," he continued, his voice softening slightly, as if trying to appeal to Max's aspirations.
The words were carefully chosen, designed to instill doubt about your influence, to paint you as an obstacle rather than an ally.
Max hesitated, caught between his father's expectations and his own feelings.
The internal struggle was evident on his face, a flicker of uncertainty crossing his features as he grappled with the conflicting loyalties that tugged at his heart.
"It is evident in your results over the weeks, you've been falling off the high scores recently, hardly been able to reach third place because of that girl!" Jos stressed out and Max became quiet, letting those words sink in.
"Max, think about it," Jos continued, his tone shifting to one of persuasion. "You need to focus on your game and not let distractions get in the way. She's not worth it."
Max felt a mix of emotions swirling inside him. He had always admired his father's wisdom, but now he sensed a subtle manipulation at play. Jos was trying to steer him away from his feelings, and deep down, Max knew it.
Yet, the idea of disappointing his father loomed larger than his own desires.
"Okay, Father," Max finally replied, his voice barely above a whisper.
He felt a pang of regret as he agreed, but he couldn't shake the feeling that he was losing a part of himself in the process. As he walked away, he contemplated the choices ahead of him.
Was it worth sacrificing his happiness for the sake of competition?
As he walked away, the sound of his father's footsteps fading behind him, he contemplated the choices ahead of him.
The internal struggle was just beginning, and Max knew he had to find a way to balance his passion for the game with the complexities of his heart.
He thought of you—the woman who had sparked something within him, a light that had ignited a warmth he hadn't been able to feel like Daniel left.
After he began to distance himself from you, he noticed a change in your demeanor.
You seemed more withdrawn, putting on a facade of happiness with a constant smile that didn’t quite reach your eyes. You were hiding behind long-sleeved coats, even in the warm weather, creating a barrier between yourself and the world around you.
The vibrant laughter that once filled the air when you were together had been replaced by a silence that hung heavily between you, punctuated only by the occasional forced chuckle or polite nod.
Max could see the way your shoulders slumped slightly, as if the weight of unspoken words and unshared feelings was pressing down on you.
Your eyes, once bright with enthusiasm and mischief, now seemed clouded, reflecting a deep-seated sadness that you tried so hard to conceal.
He remembered the long pointless conversations, the dreams you both had shared, and the plans that now felt like distant memories. It pained him to witness your struggle, yet he felt powerless to bridge the growing chasm between you.
Despite the guilt that gnawed at him, Max couldn’t help but recognize a shift in his own performance on the racetrack.
He found himself consistently finishing on the podium, a stark contrast to your struggles as you remained trapped within the top ten.
Each trophy he lifted felt heavier than the last, a reminder of the friendship that had once fueled his passion for racing.
He could hear the cheers of the crowd, feel the adrenaline coursing through his veins, but all he could think about was how you used to be there, celebrating alongside him, your face alight with pride and joy.
While he celebrated his achievements, he couldn’t shake the feeling that something important was missing.
The camaraderie they once shared seemed to slip further away with each passing race, leaving him to wonder if the price of success was worth the cost of their connection.
He often found himself glancing over at the empty spot in the pit where you used to stand, your eyes sparkling with encouragement, your voice ringing out with advice that had always kept him grounded.
As the races continued, Max felt a growing urgency to reach out, to break through the walls you had built around yourself.
But his father kept him grounded and not letting that thought come to life anytime soon. . . .
As you maneuver through the winding turns of the racetrack, adrenaline surges through your veins, a heady blend of focus and exhilaration.
"Joseph, what's the gap to Max?" you inquire, your voice steady despite the chaos enveloping you as you glance at the rearview mirror, noticing Charles's fierce pursuit as he falls into your peripheral vision, momentarily eclipsed by your recent strategic overtaking maneuver.
"2.3 seconds in front of you, Y/N," Joseph replies, his tone equally crisp yet slightly strained, hinting at the intensity of the moment.
The hum of the engine, the vibrations of the car, and the distant roar of the crowd blend into a symphony of speed, and as you negotiate the track, your mind sharpens with determination.
You consider your next move with meticulous care, knowing that a split-second decision could alter the course of the race.
Holding tightly to the steering wheel, you then ask, “Do I have permission to take over?”
Pause hangs in the air like a fragile breath, and you can almost anticipate Joseph's reply, especially given the longstanding tradition wherein hesitance often blankets these life-altering decisions.
Sure enough, after a fleeting silence, you prepare for the inevitable response that would echo in your ears like an unwelcome refrain, one you were all too familiar with.
But just as you brace yourself for a “no,” the radio crackles to life again—this time with a tidal wave of unexpected urgency.
"Yes! Y/N? Can you hear me? The team has approved the overtake of Max! Go for it!" Joseph’s voice bursts through with a burst of energy, jolting you from your reverie.
Instinctively, your foot plunges onto the accelerator as you channel every ounce of skill, focus, and ambition into propelling yourself forward.
You swiftly navigate the corner, your car gliding through the air like a bird released from captivity, and in that moment of pure adrenaline, you find yourself eclipsing Max, reclaiming the lead with undeniable ferocity.
As you settle into your newfound position at first place, the tension morphs into an exhilarating electrification coursing through your body.
Max, having momentarily lost his grip on the lead, now battles to fend off Charles and Lando from making any hazardous moves that might threaten your dominion at the front.
In the heat of the moment, the radio blaring with strategic updates fades into the background as your vision narrows solely on the track ahead—you are a race car driver, a gladiator in this battle of speed, and nothing else matters.
The world dissolves into monochrome, your focus unwavering as you grip the wheel like it’s a lifeline.
Distant cheers from the crowd seep through your concentration, yet you silence those voices, drowning out distractions as you become acutely aware of the weight of the race, the dreams that hang delicately in the balance—everything is at stake.
You feel sweat trickling down your temple and a syrupy mix of anticipation and fear soaring through your chest, but as you approach the final laps, triumph struggles to emerge from the depths of your hardwork.
Amidst the exhilarating distractions, your attention sharpens when you catch a faint echo of Joseph’s voice cutting through the chatter. "Y/N! You did it! You won!"
The joyous eruption on the other end floods your senses with disbelief, a tidal wave of emotions crashing over you.
In that electrifying moment, as you maintain your grip on the wheel for the last few seconds, reality begins to wash over you like an exhilarating wave, and the tears you could feel brewing now threaten to spill, your triumph intertwining with your vulnerability.
With the checkered flag waving triumphantly in the air, you ease down on the accelerator, the sensation of victory swelling inside you as you let a muffled cry of delight escape your lips.
You slow your car and finally breathe, releasing all the pent-up energy, as the realization of your success resonates in every fiber of your being.
"You did it, Y/N! You won the grand prix!" Joseph's voice dances through the radio, resonating with an infectious glee.
A burst of laughter escapes your lips, and for the first time, the roar of the crowd—a melodic blend of cheers—warms your heart.
As you roll to a stop, the world around you crescendos into a celebration of your harrowing journey—each twist, each turn, each heartbeat racing in sync with the rhythm of victory.
The moment is surreal, and as you step out of the car, you are not just a racer anymore; you are a triumphant force that turned dreams into reality, and no title could encapsulate the pride swelling within you.
You parked the car in front of the first-place stand, your heart racing as the adrenaline coursed through your veins. Stepping out of the vehicle, you took a moment to absorb the victory that had just unfolded; it was surreal, almost like a scene plucked from your wildest dreams.
You stood on the hood of your car, exhilaration bubbling up inside you as you raised your fists in triumph, thrusting them into the air with a euphoric fist bump that echoed your unrestrained joy.
The cheers of the crowd swirled around you, a chorus of celebration, and for a heartbeat, the entire world felt like it paused in honour of your hard-fought achievement.
The weight of every early morning, every late night, every moment spent honing your driving in the shadows now seemed beautifully light, overshadowed by the sheer thrill of the moment.
As you jumped off the car with a renewed sense of vitality, you sprinted toward your team, their faces lit up with genuine happiness.
It marked a pivotal moment, one where they no longer treated you as fragile or merely a woman in a male-dominated sport; instead, they embraced you like a teammate, a winner.
You felt the warmth of their hugs wrapping around you, their joy infectious in a way that washed away any lingering doubts you had ever held about your place in this fierce and demanding environment.
“I can’t believe we did it!” you exclaimed, looking around at their beaming faces, heart swelling.
Some laughing tears glistening in their eyes, as they crowded around you, lifting you momentarily off your feet, celebrating not only your victory but the growth of a team bound together by perseverance and shared dreams.
Max eventually pulled up in front of the second-place station, his car’s engine rumbling to a soft stop just a few feet away from you. He stepped out, the sunlight catching the edges of his helmet as he removed it, revealing a look of pure delight plastered across his face.
It was a sight that brightened your heart; his genuine smile mirrored your own, a silent acknowledgment of the fierce competition that had just transpired on the track.
You could hardly control the emotions that swelled within you. With an impulsive rush, you charged toward him, unable to contain the joy of your victory.
In a flurry of excitement, you leaped into his arms, a spontaneous act born from the adrenaline still dancing through your body. He caught you effortlessly, his hands cradling your back protectively, and in that moment, the world shrank down to just the two of you.
“I won!" you declared, breathless, your voice a mixture of disbelief and sheer happiness, as if saying it out loud might make the victory feel more real.
A grin split Max's face wider, and you could see the pride sparkling in his eyes. “Yeah, you won! Congratulations!" he echoed, his voice turning melodic with the thrill of your accomplishment.
His embrace tightened around you, and you melted into the moment, filled with a sense of camaraderie and respect that had blossomed between you two over the course of your racing journeys.
As he set you back on your feet, laughter bubbled up once again, infectious and wildly free.
"I hope I didn't catch you off guard with that leap," you admitted, a hint of embarrassment creeping into your voice as you took a sip from your drink.
"Not at all! I’m just thrilled for you," Max replied, his cheeks flushed with excitement as he gave you a friendly pat on the back.
After the interview with the top three winners, you, Max, and Charles settled into the conference room, the atmosphere buzzing with excitement as the race replay flickered on the screen. The tension was palpable as the footage captured the thrilling moments of the competition.
"Wow! That was such a turn!" Charles exclaimed, wiping the sweat from his brow, clearly still feeling the adrenaline from the race.
He was referring to the intense maneuver where he nearly overtook Lando, a moment that had everyone on the edge of their seats.
As the race continued to unfold on the screen, you found yourself lost in thought, your mind racing with the events that had just transpired.
You focused on your breathing, trying to calm the whirlwind of emotions swirling inside you. You had actually won.
Max, sitting beside you, noticed your silence and turned his attention toward you, his eyes filled with concern.
"Hey, are you alright?" he asked softly, breaking the tension in the room. His voice was steady, a comforting presence amidst the chaos of the race replay.
You nodded slowly, appreciating Max's concern but still feeling the weight of the moment. "Yeah, just processing everything," you replied, your voice barely above a whisper.
After the conference wrapped up, the divers were given the freedom to either retreat to their driver’s rooms or celebrate with their teams and families.
However, the atmosphere was tinged with concern. The race winner was notably absent, and everyone had been eagerly anticipating a celebration for your first victory.
But after you dashed out of the conference room in a flurry, you seemed to vanish without a trace.
Everyone, especially Max, who had reached out to congratulate you repeatedly, was waiting, eager for you to join them in the festivities.
Max had noticed your absence almost immediately after the conference ended. The smile that had danced on his lips dimmed when you didn't join the team to celebrate; he frequently glanced toward the driver’s room, a sense of unease gnawing at his gut.
The more he thought about it, the more his concern deepened; it wasn't like you to shy away from such moments of triumph.
As teammates and family began to cheer and revel in the evening's wins, Max made the decision to search for you.
His quest took him to the paddock and then to your garage, but each passing minute only heightened his worries. "Where could you be, Y/N?" he murmured to himself, frustration lacing his voice as he traversed the familiar paths of the circuit, searching desperately for a glimpse of you.
His heart raced with anxiety; he couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong.
Finally, his gaze landed on the door of your driver's room, slightly ajar, like a whisper beckoning him to enter. Without a second thought, he approached and knocked gently, "Y/N, are you in there?"
Listening intently, he leaned closer to the door and was met with faint whimpers that sent a chill down his spine.
Panic surged through him.
This wasn’t just a moment of celebration for you; it felt like a cry for help, echoing through the cold corridor.
Without waiting for a response, he pushed the door open wider, bracing himself for whatever he might find—though nothing could have prepared him for the sight that met his eyes when the door creaked open.
The scene unfolded before him like a nightmare; your so-called boyfriend stood menacingly above you, his hand raised as if poised to strike, while your frail form displayed clear signs of distress—your face bruised, tears streaming down your cheeks, eyes wide with a mixture of fear and disbelief.
Time seemed to freeze for a moment as he took stock of the situation, the cruel contrast of celebration outside and the terrifying reality inside your room.
"What the hell is going on here?" Max's voice cut through the air, laced with fury as he stepped into the room, instinctively placing himself between you and the looming threat.
In that instant, your boyfriend's grip on your collar slackened, surprise washing over his features as he turned to face Max.
“Stay out of this, Max! This has nothing to do with you,” your boyfriend snarled, his bravado faltering under the sudden scrutiny.
But Max remained steadfast, stepping closer, his presence commanding as he glared at the man who had dared to raise a hand against you.
“You’re wrong. It has everything to do with me. Y/N is my friend, and I won’t let you hurt her,” he replied, his voice steady yet filled with palpable tension.
Your eyes met Max's, a flicker of hope igniting amidst despair, and despite everything, the warmth of that friendship washed over you.
Max's voice echoed through the room, a mix of frustration and urgency. "You need to leave now!" he shouted, his eyes locked onto your boyfriend, who stood there with clenched fists and a scowl that could cut glass.
The tension in the air was palpable, thick enough to slice through. Your boyfriend hesitated, his anger simmering just beneath the surface, but something in Max's tone made him reconsider.
"Fine," he finally muttered, his voice low and filled with resentment. "I’ll go, but this isn’t over."
With that, he stormed out, slamming the door behind him, leaving you and Max in a heavy silence.
“Max, please…” you managed to choke out, your voice hoarse as the fear and pain slowly ebbed. “I just…I just wanted to celebrate, but I didn���t know who I could trust. I thought…”
Your voice faltered as the tears resumed their steady flow. Max's gaze softened as he turned back to you, the protective barrier he had formed in front of you embodying more than just physical defense.
“You can trust me, Y/N,” he said firmly, his expression shifting to one of concern.
With Max's unwavering support behind you, the resolve within you began to build.
“Thank you,” you whispered, your voice trembling, but a hint of strength colored your tone.
#mv1 x you#f1 fic#f1 x reader#formula 1#f1 imagine#f1 fanfic#formula one#max verstappen#f1#mv1 x reader#mv1 x y/n#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen fanfic#max verstappen x you#max verstappen fluff#max verstappen imagine#mv1 fic#mv1 imagine#mv33#mv1#jos verstappen#mv33 rb#mv33 fic#mv33 x reader#mv33 imagine#mv33 x you#mv#formula racing#mrsfancyferrari
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🎐Spirit of the Wind🎐
(Astrology Observations)
🎐 - Juno/Moon in Air Signs, these natives are looking for communication in their relationships, they are so good at expressing themselves in love & very devoted to their partners
🎐 - Aries Moons/Moon in the 1st house natives are very confident even if they don't always show it they give that energy sometimes in their personality
🎐 - I think Mercurial Moons (Gemini and Virgo moons) may get triggered the most and maybe sometimes Leo Moons too
🎐 - Lilith aspecting Saturn can bring conflicts especially with their dad/older brother/cousins/grandfather's and so on like there is always someone toxic in their family
🎐 - Moon aspecting Juno natives can be the most clingiest people, they will attach to your heart and will never go
🎐 - North Node sextile/trine/conjunct Jupiter can face many opportunities/benefits in their lives/journey/path, (in harsh aspects is like you are blinded from them and you can't see the opportunities you have in front of you)
🎐 - Pluto square/opposite/conjunct north node will mostly experience a rebirth with every thing that happens in their lives, I met so many natives with those aspects who are so experienced in their lives
🎐 - Moon sqaure/opposite/conjunct Saturn can tend to have a nostalgic mood/aura around them, something about them reminds you about the past
🎐 - Venus in Air houses (3rd,7th,11th house) have the best humour in a love/friend relationship, they will know how to comfort you both emotionally and physically
🎐 - Venus in Virgo/Venus in the 6th house will share their nurturing/healing energy with those who need it, these placements are healing and awaken type of natives
🎐 - Neptune/Pluto conjunct the ascendant will feel like they belong in the world, they can feel sometimes outcasted or maybe out of the crowd but that's what makes them unique they're just born different (in a nice way I love them so much)
🎐 - Uranus conjunct the ascendant will make the native very creative, they are the type of people who come off with the best ideas and the best plans for everything
🎐 - Sun opposite Lilith (h12) can attract other people only with their presence, Lilith can feel very strong when aspects the sun but when it's opposite, it will share that energy to themselves
🎐 - Lilith (h12) square/opposite/parallel/conjunct Moon are so seductive at first and is the fact that in contact with others it will just make them more curious about your life
🎐 - Uranus in the 7th house can make the native confused about their relationships and love life, they're like "What tf happens in my life now"
🎐 - South Node in the 9th house natives can feel very detached from religion/religiously detached and honestly you can't blame at all for that. Is the south node energy
🎐- Although im still not sure if Jupiter represents the husband in modern astrology instead of Mars but in vedic chart Jupiter it still represents the husband and i love to read about it 😭✋🏼
🎐 - Think at Vesta Asteroid (4) as a the point where your soul feels at home, feels safe, feels free. For example I have my Vesta in the 2nd house (Venus rules that house, and I tend to believe food brings me soul happiness especially chocolate 🍫✋🏼😭)
🎐 - I honestly love natives with Scorpio/ Sagittarius or Capricorn in big 6 because they honestly don't give a single f about what people say about them, really
🎐 - Someone asked me if the people with moon prominence in the chart feel the Intensity when the moon is changing signs and phases 😭✋🏼 yes they can, I feel like crazy when the moon is at first quarter
🎐 - Okayyy so there is an asteroid opposite to Lilith (h12) called (White Moon Selena h56) honestly is a good asteroid, is like a pure energy in your birth chart but in the same time it shows what things bring you happines, use this chart to identify what can bring your happiness
🎐 - I think I never mentioned before but Sun in the 6th house natives really can shine everywhere they go with their nurturing energy
🎐 - Do people with asc - pluto aspects seem maybe rude/harsh at first😭? Is because they have the Pluto aura around them which can make them seem like a bad guy, but they can be the sweetest people
🎐 - Moon at the 6°, 18° degrees really so observe everything in the room even the small details like wow idk how they can be so focused on everything and analyzing every detail
🎐 - Neptune in the 1st house natives or Neptune aspecting the ascendant may have something unique about their skin like moles or maybe birth marks? maybe freckles too
🎐 - Uranus in the 9th house natives can end up travelling to places they never expected, like those people who wake up in the middle or nowhere or "I never imagined I would travel here" kind of vibe
🎐 If you have Saturn in Cancer or Saturn in the 4th house you kinda have a lot of family karma, and generational karma as well. Is not bad but try to not blame yourself for this
🎐 Pluto in the 7th house is one of the placements I wish I had in my chart because I just love the meaning behind this placement is that the relationships change you very intensely and the same happens with Venus - Pluto aspects, if you have both you are more wise/mature in the future relationships
🎐 Gemini/Sagittarius and Pisces Mercury can indicate a person may talk too fast/bold way of talking/sometimes they can be a bit too harsh in their talking too
🎐 Juno in the 9th/12th house can indicate that you may find your lover in a forgien country or somewhere away from your home maybe while traveling
🎐 Juno in the 6th/Juno in Virgo can indicate a spouse/specific person who loves to take care of their mental health a lot they actually have a very healing energy
🎐 Juno aspecting the ascendant people will see you as someone ideal to marry/or to date (Unless they are like "Would you like to have kids* yeah my Juno rejects these things.
🎐 Juno in the 11th house or in Aquarius can indicate a spouse/specific person who appreciates your *weird* side, and also someone who gives you freedom
🎐 From Tarzan's jungle we did a bigggg jump back in the north America to visit the indigenous American culture because 😍😍😍 their culture is extremely beautiful and unique and here we met Pocahontas which by way was based by the legend of Pocahontas🎐
🌲🌲First let me say they are so beautiful if you think Pocahontas is pretty you need to look for how indigenous north American people look like (Slightly different from the south american ones but still share a close thing together). Their connection with nature and with the earth is very pure 🌲🌲
Have a very beautiful day to all of you who read my notes, Harmoonix ♥️❤️
#astrology#astro observations#birth chart#astro notes#astrology observations#placements#astro community#horoscope#ascendant#venus#astro.com#astro.seek#astrolog#astro
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you're the thoughts that can't be tamed
and i'm trying to be sane
⋆˙⟡♡ MDNI. whewww. the people demanded more high / toxic!megumi and the people got more high / toxic!megumi. tw for angst, daddy issues, drug use, smut. 4.3k words. all characters aged up 21+. ๋࣭ ⭑ life held no promises - it was a fact that you and megumi were made well aware from a very early age. from sleeping under blanket forts as kids to sneaking through windows as teenagers, he'd always been your one constant in a sea of variables. but what happens when the tides become strong enough to pull him away too? ๋࣭ ⭑ this was fucking emotional to write, not gonna lie. lemme know whatcha think, luv u ⋆˙⟡♡
𓆩🖤𓆪
“No one else has what we have.”
Those were Megumi's favorite words to say to you.
On the nights where both of your dads would take off together, deciding that they were done being responsible for the two of you for a few days, you would hide under blankets in his room and laugh at the things that only 9-year-old you would understand.
You'd keep yourselves occupied with video games and books and dive so far into each other’s imaginations that you'd completely forget about the world around you.
It was all late-night summer air, swinging in your backyard for hours, and the way that you two were somehow able to turn something as damning as parental abandonment into adventure.
As teenagers, reality became harder to sugarcoat but there was still that same unfettered energy between both of you that made it doable.
At 14, you'd sit on the edge of his bed during the wintertime, drinking beer that you'd stolen from Toji's stash and exchange secrets in-between drunken kisses that neither one of you would be brave enough to acknowledge the next day.
You'd walk to school together with matching tired eyes and unkempt hair and he would tell people to fuck off when they’d ask you why you'd been wearing the same hoodie for a week straight.
He'd sneak through your bedroom window on the nights that your house didn’t feel safe just to lay with you, running light fingers through your hair while sharing a set of tangled headphones to drown out the sound of your parents arguing.
The things that he couldn’t tell his other friends, the things that he couldn’t tell his family, the things that he could barely tell himself – he'd tell you.
You were two halves of two very broken homes. Rigid and unstable when apart but perfectly balanced when together. From spending practically every weekend together to essentially raising one another since none of the adults in either of your lives had any interest in doing so – he was right:
No one else had what you had.
𓆩🖤𓆪
Nobara's ceiling fan creaked steadily above you as you stared back at it, trying but failing to swallow down your emotions.
You rolled over, careful not to wake her as you reached for your phone to see the time "3:33" displayed across the screen. With a heavy sigh, you unplugged it from the charger and crept out of bed, keeping your movements light as you made your way into the living room.
You wrapped one of her knit blankets around your shoulders, sinking down onto the couch like you'd done so many times over the last few weeks you'd been staying here. There were bags under your eyes that you were convinced would never go away. Tear stains on your cheeks that felt like they'd been permanently adopted by your skin.
Thinking about Megumi was nothing new, it was the unfamiliar pain that came along with it that you couldn't quite adjust to. The way your chest tightened and your insides burned with each memory that surfaced. What used to be the most comfortable part of your brain was now the one place you were desperate to stay away from.
"So you're leaving then?"
You'd replayed the last conversation you'd had with him so many times, it still felt like you were in his room most days. A ghost that wandered the halls, hopelessly waiting for him to come back no matter how much time passed.
You had struggled to look back at him that night, his pupils dilated from the Oxy he had taken. There was something so unnerving about being so close to him and so far away from him at the same time. How physically, he was within arm's reach, but mentally, there might as well have been galaxies separating you.
Your voice betrayed you, shaking as you fought to keep your resolve. "That's what you want, right? For me to leave?"
He was silent, his worn-down demeanor saying more than his voice was capable of at the time. You watched his hand twitch at his side as if his own body was attempting to fight against his sentiment. "Just go."
You stared at him, forcing yourself to take in his pale face and hollowed out blue eyes. You'd seen the whole thing. The entire progression of the boy who used to build blanket forts with you to protect you from the outside world to the boy who'd taken your virginity on a rainy September night when you were 15 because "you both deserved to know what it felt like to be loved" to the vacant 22-year-old who was standing in front of you with nothing left to offer to you or himself.
You'd been there for every day and every moment that had led the two of you down that one pivotal breaking point, but you still couldn't fathom it. You didn't have it in you to fight with him. Didn't have it in you to push back or yell or fall apart in front of him like you both thought you would.
Instead, you did something much more damning: you mirrored him. Leaving him with an empty, "Okay." as you closed the door to his apartment and disappeared back to your car, realizing that his words still reigned true, only they held a new meaning - no one else had what you had, not even you.
You nestled into the couch, using your phone to put the same song on repeat as you tried to close your eyes again. Out of all the grievances you'd experienced throughout your life, you had never considered until recently how much harder it was to mourn the living than it was to mourn the dead.
𓆩🖤𓆪
Megumi had barely slept in the last three days. His thoughts were blurred by hazy white pills and scattered flashbacks of the things he should've never said to you and worst of all...
The way your face used to light up when you'd wake up next to him and what a jarring contrast it was to have his eyes flutter open to an empty bottle of whiskey on his nightstand instead.
"I feel awake when I'm with you."
He'd said it to you one morning when you'd both just woken up, his fingers running lazy circles over the top of your shoulder, his arms still wrapped protectively around you from the previous night's sleep.
"I'm listening." You hummed, propping your head up to meet his blue eyes in quiet encouragement.
He wasn't always the best with his words - you both knew that, but he still tried as he kept his fingertips featherlight against your skin. "I'm always so tired, but... not when I'm with you."
He remembered the way your pupils bloomed while he tucked a piece of hair behind your ear, letting himself say the things he'd usually be too afraid to admit. "I... feel like the only time life really makes sense is when we're like this, you know...? When we're both half asleep tangled up in each other."
You cried, your hands finding the back of his neck as your lips met his in a gentle mid-morning daze.
It was the first time you'd said it - it poured out in between breaths and tears, opening up like a floodgate once it began: "I love you." you whispered against his lips. "I love you." You repeated while you pulled him on top of you. "I love you." as he slid your shirt above your shoulders. "I love you." only, it was his voice this time fanning across the nape of your neck. "I love you." he exhaled again, carefully sliding into you. "I love you." you moaned, your eyes completely fixated on him as he thrusted harder.
"I love you, I love you, I love you..."
The nostalgia was so intense it rang through his ears, his stomach churning violently. No matter how much he tried to bury you, you were still everywhere. Stuck to the walls. Stitched in his blankets. Embedded into his skin.
Panic swelled in his chest, his hand shaking as he dug the cellophane baggy out of his hoodie pocket and promptly shoved two oval-shaped pills into his mouth.
"That's what you want, right? For me to leave?"
The answer wasn't yes because he didn't love you, the answer was yes because he did love you. Because after all that you'd been forced to deal with between your dad and his, the last thing you needed was for another man you trusted to let you down the way he was.
"Just go."
It wasn't that he wanted you to, it was that you needed to.
𓆩🖤𓆪
"You're not responsible for him." Nobara said as she handed you a cup of coffee, taking a seat next to you on the couch. "You realize that, don't you?"
Despite her rough edges when it came to men, she was truly the gentlest friend you had. She was patient. Kind. Non-judgmental. She listened to your feelings no matter how repetitive or morbid they may have been. There really weren't enough 'thank you's when it came to how much she'd been there for you over the last few weeks.
You dropped the blanket from your shoulders and took a sip, struggling to look back at her. "I know, I just -" you faltered, your eyes still locked onto the steam rolling off of your mug. "I just hope he's okay..."
It was the longest you'd gone without seeing him and no matter how many times she'd tried to remind you that you couldn't hold yourself accountable for his well being, you still felt an odd sense of responsibility for him. It was a feeling that you'd held onto for so long, you weren't sure how you were supposed to even separate yourself from it now.
Nobara let out a stifled breath, shooting you a pointed look as she took her own sip. "Has he ever been okay?"
The question was damning enough to bring your attention to hers, your breath hitching in your throat as you looked back at her.
"Look, I know you love him." Her hand was on your shoulder, her eyes softening a bit. "But you can't save him."
Flashbacks of an 11-year-old, chubby-cheeked version of him smashed through your mind. The way the warmth of his hand contrasted the coldness of your feet as he helped sneak you in through the sliding back door. You apologized to him for having to risk getting him in trouble just to let you in, but you couldn't be at your house for another minute. Even at his young age, he looked so perplexed by your guilt, shaking his head as his eyebrows furrowed. "If you're ever in trouble, I'll always come get you."
There was such an indescribable amount of safety laced into that one sentence alone.
"You promise?"
"Promise."
Nobara's grip tightened on your shoulder, gently trying to pull you back to reality, but his words were suddenly everywhere. His promise echoing on an unwanted loop as you sat your mug down on her coffee table and grabbed your phone.
Even with the falling out you'd had, he never stopped sharing his location with you. It wasn't an invitation back into his life by any means, but it was proof that his sentiment from all those years ago still held merit. That no matter what happened, he'd always know where to find you and you'd always know where to find him too.
Her expression was serious as she watched you, trying to find a tactful way to say what she needed. "I can't stop you." She finally exhaled, "And you know that I'll never tell you what to do, but..." It was that same sense of comfort you'd felt as a child, only this time it came in the form of protective brown eyes. "Remember that you're important too, okay? You matter just as much as he does."
Your body stilled, your stare lingering as you nodded back at her. A wave of the same fear you'd felt that night on his back porch swept over you again. "I know." You said softly. "We both matter. That's why I have to at least try."
𓆩🖤𓆪
Megumi stood under the warmth of his shower, letting steam fill the room as water beaded off of his pale skin. His eyes were heavy, his stomach struggling to keep up with the deficient mix of painkillers and nothingness he'd been offering it the last few days.
He was tired - physically, mentally, spiritually.
Absolutely drained in every sense of the word.
He let the water pour over him until it began to run cold, his hand finally reaching for the dial when he was certain there wasn't a drop of heat left for him. He reached for a towel, haphazardly running it through his hair before wrapping it around his waist. The bloodshot stare of his reflection was haunting, a painful familiarity laced into the tidal wave irises looking back at him.
"One day you'll understand." It was something that he had heard more times than he could count growing up. "One day you'll fuckin' get it." Megumi had always written it off as a jaded excuse from the man who'd raised him. A despondent explanation for his father's shitty behavior in place of an apology. But as he stood in front of the medicine cabinet in his empty apartment, he realized that for the first time maybe it wasn't an excuse for his father's neglect. Maybe it had been something much worse: a warning.
His fist slammed into the mirror without a second thought, an impulsive blur of blood and shattered glass flying past his face as he watched his hollowed-out reflection fracture and drop to the ground in tiny, severed pieces.
"Megumi...?"
Any fleeting amount of relief that he'd gained from the impact was instantly stolen by the softness of your voice.
His head snapped up, the bathroom door cracked open just enough for your eyes to lock with his.
He'd heard as a kid that the only time angels were visible to human beings is when they were needed the most. He didn't believe it back then, but it was the only explanation he could find to explain seeing you in his hallway.
He blinked back at you slowly, his gaze drifting from his battered knuckles to the blood staining the wall in front of him, to the floor that was covered in glass shards.
You didn't hesitate. Didn't pause to ask for an explanation. Didn't flinch at the scene you'd walked into. You just stood there, observing him in quiet understanding.
Time felt like it had come to a grinding halt as he watched you extend a hand out to him with all of the patience in the world. You were goodness incarnated and he was so undeserving.
"Let me help you."
𓆩🖤𓆪
His grasp was warm, his cut up fingers tangling cautiously into yours as you helped pull him away from the wreckage.
He followed behind you, letting you guide him back to his room where you promptly began cleaning and bandaging his injuries. It was almost nostalgic to be sitting with him like this again. Memories of middle school and the way he'd plop himself down on the edge of your bed after his most recent fight surfaced through your mind as you tended to his wounds.
You were almost done, lifting his wrist up to double-check your work when his hand broke free from yours. His thumb suddenly finding the underside of your chin to tilt your face up to his. It was the first time all night that you'd been able to look into him rather than just at him.
"You have a pretty big gash on your middle finger, but -" your voice was barely audible, completely overruled by the way he was staring at you. "It should be okay..." you swallowed, struggling to hold onto the calmness that you'd fought so hard to maintain thus far. "Where's your vacuum? I'll grab it real quick and –"
"Why're you here?"
Your mouth opened and then closed again, the wheels in your head viciously turning as your eyes searched his. There was an extensive list of reasons as to why you were here. A never-ending list, really. And he knew that just as well as you did.
You looked over him carefully, drawing in a shallow breath before pulling away from his hand. "A promise is a promise, right?"
His pupils widened, a glint of what almost resembled anger flickering across his face. "You've gotta let that go, you're smarter than that."
It was enough to snap your attention back to him, resentment settling heavily into the pit of your stomach. "Yeah well, unlike you, when I said 'always', I meant always - not 'always' until it got too hard. Or 'always' until I'm done. I meant fucking always, Megumi."
He leaned in closer to you, his tone every bit as sharp as his expression. The heat from his body was suddenly noticeable as it filled the small space between you. "God, you're dense sometimes. You really don't get it, do you? I didn't tell you to leave because things 'got too hard' or because I was 'done'." His stare was piercing, his face only centimeters away from yours. "I told you to leave because no one deserves to treat you like this. No one deserves to hurt you. No one, not even me. I don't get some pass just because of a promise we made as kids."
The scorned rebuttal you had lined up abruptly died on your tongue by his last sentence. The air felt stagnant and far too thick to breathe. Tears were pricking at the corners of your eyes, threatening to spill the longer you looked at him, but you fought with everything you had to keep them at bay.
"I guess we're both facing the same problem then." Your tone was light despite the crippling weight your words held. "Because no one deserves to hurt you like this either, not even you."
It felt like every late-night conversation, every right and wrong decision, every major life lesson that had played out between the two of you had only been practice for this one grave moment.
You watched the first small crack form in his concrete demeanor as you rested your hand on the back of his neck. Could almost hear the second one splinter down when his fingers traced along your jawline, catching tears you didn't even realize had fallen. Could practically feel the reverb of how shattering the third fracture was as he leaned in and attentively parted your lips with his tongue.
"I think the only time life makes sense is when we're like this."
You pulled him in closer, letting the past and present blur together through gentle, desperate touches. His grasp tightened around your waist, neither one of you able to stop what you'd started. You'd kissed him so many times before, groveled for him in so many different ways, but you weren't sure that you'd ever known this type of fervency for anyone or anything else in your life.
His hands were calloused, damaged but still tender as they ran through your hair, pulling your head back slightly. His mouth drifted to the side of your neck, the warmth of his breath dancing across your skin. "I love you." It was so faint that you weren't sure if he had actually said it or if it was just another part of your past coming back to haunt the both of you.
He hovered over you, gradually leaning you back into the mattress as the towel wrapped around his waist fell to the floor. You followed his lead, letting him delicately slip your t-shirt up over your head. Your heart stuttered in your chest, watching his eyes roam over you as he unbuttoned your shorts.
There was something so intimidating and overwhelmingly comforting about how well he knew you. Every freckle. Every scar. Every blemish. There wasn't a single part of your body that he hadn't familiarized himself with over the years.
His fingertips traced easily over the inside of your thigh, his eyes locked intently with yours. "You're sure this is what you want?"
His movements were calculated as he drew up towards your center, keeping his touch featherlight and his voice low. "You could have anyone else you wanted, you know that? Probably even have a pretty normal life without me.”
You shook your head at him, trying not to squirm as he slid a slender finger into you. "Just you." you whispered.
His thumb brushed against your clit with just the right amount of pressure while he added another finger. "I'm hard to love." He reminded you, his eyes glazing over as he watched your hips thrust up towards him.
"D - don't care." you moaned, trying to keep your focus despite the way he was picking up the pace, plunging innn and outttt of you, only going deeper with each time you tried to speak. "I... don't - oh, f...fuck."
"You don't what, baby?" Your walls were wrapped around him so tight, swallowing him hopelessly as you writhed beneath him. You opened your mouth again, but your thoughts were all but stolen from you as he slammed into you, rendering you a whimpering mess. "Words." he demanded.
You were trying so hard to keep it together, trying so hard not to soak him, but your release and emotions were all threatening to flood out at once the harder he went. You were grabbing onto him, clenching around his fingers as they continued their relentless assault on you.
"I don't want easy," it was almost one word with how breathlessly it came out. "I don't want easy –" you repeated, your body needily bucking up towards him again. "I want you. I'll always want you." you were finally at your breaking point, drenching him as he looked down at you with feral adoration. "Fuck Megumi, please."
He withdrew from you, his composure a bit more feverish as he leaned in to kiss you. It was hard, urgent.
"Bend over for me." He said against your lips.
He helped you roll over, grabbing your thighs to lift you into position while you arched your back for him and buried your face into the softness of his comforter. The absence of his fingers was short-lived, his tip suddenly prodding at your entrance.
He went in slow, watching you carefully as he held onto your hips for support and pulled you onto him. His pace was determined by your breathing. You were taking him so well, your body practically melting under his touch as he entered you, but he wanted every confirmation he could get that you really were in this as much as he was.
"I love you." you panted, tilting your head to look up at him over your shoulder. "I love you." you said again, feeling the hesitation from him finally start to dissipate.
His grip dug into your sides, each thrust rougher than the last. "Say it again." He nodded.
But you could barely get the first word out before he buried himself into you, taking away every last bit of resolve you had left. He leaned over so that his body was locking yours in place, his breath trailing across your shoulder as you shook underneath him, heady little whines filling the space between you.
His hand wrapped delicately around your throat while his voice picked up where yours had left off. "I love you." he exhaled.
Your eyes widened when they caught his. There was something so irrevocably binding about the way he was looking at you, it almost felt like an agreement. A soul tie. A meeting between angels and mortals. A promise where "always" really meant always.
"I love you." You whispered, not breaking away from his stare as his pace quickened. His thrusts were unyielding, his body becoming just as needy as yours while your nails dug desperately into his sheets. "I love you." you let out again, your walls nearly smothering him. "I love you." you whined, feeling yourself clench and spasm around him. "I love you." He groaned, holding you in place as he filled you - his cum mixing with yours, sealing the unspoken contract you’d both created.
"I love you. I love you. I love you..."
𓆩🖤𓆪
Megumi was careful not to wake you the next morning. He slipped out from under your grasp with all the caution he possessed as he got to his feet, throwing a pair of boxers on and sliding a black hoodie over his head.
He grabbed the empty bottles that were littering his nightstand before closing the door to his bedroom and heading to the kitchen. It was the first time he'd woken up sober in roughly 3 weeks. The clarity that came along with it was almost too much to handle as he looked over the state of his apartment. The piles of dishes. The destroyed bathroom mirror. The blood stains on the floor of the hallway.
It all told a story, painted an entirely too vivid picture of his own self destruction. He reached into the pocket of his hoodie, finding a cellophane baggy filled with the last 4 Oxys he had.
He took a breath, looking over them. Knowing that they were the one thing that could make everything feel so much more bearable and all it would take was one quick swallow. "God damnit..." He sighed.
Your footsteps were too light for him to hear as you crept around the corner, watching him dump the contents of the baggy into the kitchen sink.
He hastily turned on the water, fighting the urge to fish them out as he let them disappear down the drain. Today might hurt. Tomorrow might hurt. But as he turned around and caught your eye, he quickly realized that they weren't the only thing that could make everything better, they were far from it…
"Need some help?"
No matter how out of control life got, he would always have one advantage: No one else had what he had.
𓆩🖤𓆪
#jjk x reader#rem writes#megumi fushiguro#fushiguro megumi#jjk megumi#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen#megumi x angst#megumi smut#megumi x reader#fushiguro megumi x reader#jjk fanfic#toxic!megmi#megumi angst#jjk angst#jjk drabbles#megumi fushiguro angst
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"Borrowed Bodies, Reunited Lives".
Dylan’s Perspective:
I always thought a cruise vacation would be perfect: the sun, the sea, and the chance to disconnect from everything. But when your only travel companions are your parents, who can barely spend a minute together without arguing, the idea loses its charm. So, when my parents announced we’d be spending the holidays sailing to Miami, I couldn’t help but feel a mix of excitement and frustration.
They are Ethan and Susan, the perfect representation of a marriage that has lost its way. They argue about everything, from which channel to watch on TV to how to park the car. They never agree, and being in the middle of their endless arguments is a place I’d rather not be. That’s why the idea of spending weeks locked on a ship with them seemed more like a punishment than a break.
If only I could bring Alex and Joshua, my best friends from the gym, things would be different. They’re like my older brothers, always with advice, jokes, and that camaraderie that only forms between those who share long training sessions and complaints about the same exercise machines. Alex is more reserved, but he has a sarcastic sense of humor that always makes me smile, while Joshua is the extrovert of the group, capable of lighting up any room with his energy.
Of course, bringing them along was an impossible dream. My parents would never allow it, and they certainly couldn’t afford it. But sometimes, even the most unlikely things have a strange way of coming true.
One afternoon, as I was walking back from the gym, I saw an elderly woman trying to lift a heavy bag off the sidewalk. I stopped to help her; I didn’t think much of it, it just seemed like the right thing to do. When the woman thanked me, she looked at me with eyes that seemed to pierce through me and said something strange:
—Make a wish, young man. A real one.
I didn’t think much of it. I thought it was some kind of game or joke, but in the end, I said the first thing that came to mind:
—I wish my friends could come with me on the cruise.
The old woman smiled, murmured something I didn’t understand, and walked away. I didn’t dwell on it, although that night I couldn’t help but think about her words.
The day of departure arrived, and as expected, nothing extraordinary happened. Alex and Joshua weren’t there. Everything was the same: my parents arguing, me wishing I wasn’t there. Until, suddenly, things started to get strange.
As the ship set sail, I noticed my parents weren’t just arguing, their voices sounded completely out of place. My dad let out a rude “What the hell am I doing here?”, while my mom muttered a “No way, dude!”. They both looked at me with a mix of confusion and bewilderment.
Then my phone rang. It was Alex. Or at least, that’s what the screen said. I answered, and what I heard on the other end froze me. It was my dad. Or rather, his voice, saying something completely absurd:
—Dylan, it’s me! I’m your dad.
And just like that, my cruise adventure, which already promised to be uncomfortable, took a turn I never could have imagined, even in my worst nightmares.
Ethan and Susan Perspective:
Ethan woke up startled in a place he didn’t recognize. The room was small, with dull-colored walls, barely lit by a beam of sunlight filtering through the curtains. He brought a hand to his face and felt something strange: his beard was gone.
When he looked down, the shock was even greater. This wasn’t his body. His torso was strong, defined, and his hands, large and youthful, weren’t the ones he remembered.
—What the hell is going on?!—he shouted, jumping up.
On the other side of the room, someone else moved. Susan, or at least what should have been Susan, slowly sat up from a single bed. But instead of her slender figure, it was the body of a muscular young man with messy hair and a bewildered expression.
—What happened to me?—Susan asked, touching her face with hands larger than she expected. Then she looked at the mirror in front of her, and a scream escaped her mouth—It can’t be!
Ethan staggered slightly as he approached, trying to control his movements. He looked at both their reflections and confirmed the impossible: he was in Joshua’s body, one of Dylan’s friends, and Susan was in Alex’s.
—This has to be a nightmare…—Ethan said, running a hand through his short hair.
—This isn’t real!—Susan screamed, touching her arms and chest, feeling the muscles now belonging to her. Her gaze was filled with horror—This can’t be real!
At that moment, Susan’s phone—or rather Alex’s, which was in the pocket of her pants—began to ring. They both looked at each other, uncertain. Ethan took the phone and answered.
—Hello?
On the other end of the line, Dylan answered immediately, his tone filled with panic:
—Dad… it’s me.
Ethan squinted.
—Dylan? What’s going on?
—Dad, mom…—Dylan stammered, trying to explain while listening to Alex (now in Ethan’s body) argue with someone in the background—I think… I think you switched bodies with Alex and Joshua.
Susan, who had been listening from across the room, quickly approached.
—What did you do, Dylan?—she asked with Alex’s deep voice, snatching the phone from Ethan—What did you do?!
—I… I didn’t know this was going to happen—Dylan defended himself, his voice full of guilt—I helped an old woman, and she told me she’d grant me a wish. I just asked for Alex and Joshua to come on the cruise with me.
Ethan huffed, snatching the phone back.
—An old woman?! What kind of joke is this?
—It’s not a joke, dad—Dylan replied—This is real, but… I don’t know how to fix it.
—Of course you don’t!—Susan growled from the back, crossing her arms—We’re stuck in the bodies of two guys we barely know!
—Please, just calm down. We need to think…—Dylan tried to say, but his voice sounded weak, even to himself.
—Calm down?—Susan screamed—We lost our cruise, our lives, everything!
Ethan sighed deeply, trying to remain calm, even though his hands were trembling.
—Listen, Dylan. For now, we’ll look for that old woman, if she even exists. You stay on the cruise and try to keep those two idiots under control.
Dylan swallowed hard.
—Got it.
Ethan hung up and placed the phone on the bed, his expression hardened.
—This can’t be permanent, right?—Susan asked quietly, though she knew no one had the answer.
Ethan didn’t respond right away. Instead, he looked at his new arms, so strong that it almost seemed like a joke.
—While we figure out how to reverse this… I think we should make the most of this vacation.
Susan glared at him.
—Make the most of it? Ethan, we’re in the bodies of strangers!
—I know, but we can’t just sit around feeling sorry for ourselves—he said, though a nervous smile crossed his face as he flexed his arms—I never had muscles like this…
Susan ran a hand over her face, frustrated.
—Maybe this is a sign—she murmured, more to herself than to him—A lesson for us.
Ethan raised an eyebrow.
—A lesson?
—To solve our problems… as a couple.
Ethan let out a snort but didn’t argue. Though they both knew that the only thing they could agree on was finding that old woman and returning to their lives as quickly as possible.
In the city, Ethan and Susan walked down a narrow alley, following the coordinates Dylan had provided over the phone. However, the place was empty, with no trace of the gypsy old woman who had set everything in motion.
—This can’t be, she doesn’t even exist!—Susan exclaimed, crossing her arms and shooting a reproachful glance at Ethan—This is your fault.
Ethan raised an eyebrow, clearly tired of his wife’s constant accusations.
—My fault? Please! Dylan was the one who made the wish, and we’re the ones stuck in this mess with his little friends.
Susan snorted, turning around to head back to the apartment they were now sharing.
Once they arrived, they both collapsed on the sofa. Susan sighed with frustration, while Ethan stood up to inspect the small living room.
—This is a disaster—Susan said, bringing her hands to her face—I just want my normal life back.
—I wouldn’t complain too much, you know?—Ethan responded with a smile, taking off his shirt in front of the apartment mirror. He admired his defined and sculpted muscles, something he hadn’t seen in years—Look at this! When was the last time I looked like this?
—For the love of God, Ethan! Put your shirt on. This is ridiculous—Susan scolded, though her gaze briefly drifted to her husband, now in Joshua’s body.
—Ridiculous?—Ethan chuckled as he flexed his arms in front of the mirror—This is like turning back time.
Fed up with his attitude, Susan jumped up and, in a burst of frustration, decided to check for herself how she looked now. She stood in front of the mirror and, with some curiosity, slid her hands down the muscular arms of Alex’s body.
—This… this is weird—Susan admitted quietly, staring at her reflection. Her new body was strong and bulky, something she never imagined experiencing—I’ve never felt like this in my life.
—Weird?—Ethan said, approaching her with a teasing smile—Don’t tell me you’re not enjoying it a little.
Susan rolled her eyes and stepped away from the mirror.
—I don’t care how I look now. What I want is to get my life back, not walk around showing off like you.
Ethan raised his hands in a peace gesture, although he still had a satisfied expression.
—Alright, alright. But, while we find the old woman, we could make the most of it… How about we go out for dinner?
—Dinner?—Susan repeated, raising an eyebrow.
—Yes, of course. But first, I think we should go to the gym. Isn’t that what Alex and Joshua would do? Besides, I’m sure these bodies need exercise to stay like this.
Reluctantly, Susan agreed. After all, there wasn’t much else to do.
At the gym, they faced the demanding routines of Alex and Joshua. Ethan, used to a much more sedentary lifestyle, tried to keep up with the weights, while Susan, clearly annoyed, followed the instructions she found on Alex’s phone.
—This is crazy—Susan murmured, wiping the sweat from her forehead as she watched Ethan drinking an energy shake—How do they do this every day?
—It’s a matter of habit—Ethan replied, smiling as he approached a treadmill.
Suddenly, a young man approached them. He was wearing tight athletic gear and had a relaxed attitude.
—Alex? Joshua?—Ethan asked with a smile, looking them up and down.
Sergio and Susan exchanged quick glances. They had no idea who he was, but decided to play along.
—Yes, it's us—Ethan replied, trying to sound nonchalant.
The young man nodded, as if he already knew them well.
—Great. Hey, I’m hosting a party tonight. You guys should come. It’ll be at my place, nothing formal, just friends.
—Party?—Susan repeated, surprised.
—Yeah, sure. It’ll be fun—the young man responded before giving them more details and walking away with a smile.
When the young man disappeared from sight, Ethan turned to Susan with enthusiasm.
—This is perfect.
—Perfect?—Susan said, crossing her arms—Are you suggesting we go?
—Of course. When was the last time we went to a party with young people? All we do is attend boring adult gatherings. This could be an opportunity to experience something new.
Susan looked at him incredulously, but deep down, something in his words sparked her curiosity.
—Suppose I agree… But no acting like an idiot, Ethan.
—Deal!—he replied with a triumphant smile.
Meanwhile, Susan couldn’t help but wonder if this experience might be more than just a bad nightmare… Maybe, even, an opportunity to rediscover something lost in their relationship.
The night came, and Ethan and Susan, more nervous than excited, tried to pick the best clothes they could find in Alex and Joshua’s wardrobes. Ethan chose some tight dark jeans and a white shirt that was a little too snug, while Susan, uncomfortable, put on a sleeveless shirt and shorts that left little to the imagination.
—This is ridiculous—Susan said, adjusting her clothes in front of the mirror—Do young people really dress like this?
—Relax—Ethan replied, straightening his shirt collar—We’re doing this to fit in, remember?
With little money in their pockets, they decided to stop for a coffee before heading to the party. Sitting at a small table by the window, the atmosphere was surprisingly calm. For the first time in years, they weren’t arguing.
—This is… strange—Susan commented, stirring her coffee.
—What’s strange?—Ethan asked, looking out the window.
—Us. Here, not fighting. As if… as if we were another couple.
Ethan smiled faintly.
—Maybe this change has something good after all.
Before Susan could respond, Ethan’s phone started ringing. It was Dylan.
—How’s everything going over there?—Ethan asked as Susan moved closer to listen.
—Fine... I think. Alex and Joshua are keeping it together, although it’s total chaos.—Dylan sighed on the other end of the line—Did you find the old woman?
—No—Susan responded with frustration—We followed the coordinates, but there was no sign of her.
—Well, at least you tried.
Ethan cleared his throat.
—By the way, we’re going to a party tonight.
—What?—Dylan exclaimed—What party? Whose?
—A guy from the gym invited us. We don’t know him, but he seemed insistent.—Ethan paused—Dylan, do you know who he is?
—No. Maybe he’s new in town or at the gym. Be careful.
They hung up shortly after, and Ethan and Susan finished their coffees before heading to the party.
The place was full of energy. Colorful lights blinked while music echoed in every corner. People were laughing, dancing, and chatting in small groups. Ethan and Susan looked at each other nervously before entering, trying to appear relaxed.
—Remember, act like we know them—Ethan whispered.
Inside, they recognized several people from the gym. Probably Alex and Joshua's friends. Susan tried to chat with a few people, but couldn’t fully connect, while Ethan helped himself to a drink at the table.
It was then that the guy who had invited them appeared. He was tall, with dark brown hair and a charismatic smile.
—Alex, Joshua, I’m glad you came—the young man said, shaking their hands—I’m Elijah, by the way.
—Nice to meet you, Elijah—Susan replied, trying to sound casual.
Elijah smiled in a peculiar way, as if he knew something more.
—So, how are you adjusting to... the new?—he asked with a tone that seemed both innocent and mocking.
Ethan felt something stir inside him. That phrase had been too specific.
—What do you mean?—Ethan asked, feigning disinterest.
Elijah shrugged, his smile barely visible.
—Nothing, just a way of saying. Enjoy the party.
As Elijah walked away, Ethan was left thinking. How could he know something? The idea that he might be connected to the old woman crossed his mind, but he quickly dismissed it. However, something didn’t add up.
He decided to find Susan to talk about it, but at that moment, someone else approached him.
—Hey, Alex, wanna grab a drink?—a young man asked, calling Susan, or rather, Alex’s body.
Susan, unsuspecting, accepted the invitation and walked away, leaving Ethan alone.
Ethan sat at one of the tables, reflecting on what had just happened. He looked around, observing the other guests, but couldn’t get Elijah’s words out of his mind.
—So, how are you adjusting to... the new?
Lost in his thoughts, he barely noticed when Susan came back. But what really snapped him out of his reverie was seeing her without a shirt, wearing a swimsuit she had found in the apartment.
—What the hell are you doing?—Sergio asked, alarmed.
Susan shrugged.
—Apparently, this is normal here. Besides, who cares? No one knows who we really are.
Ethan put a hand to his face, stifling a sigh. This night was going to be longer than he expected.
Susan, still animated by the festive atmosphere and clearly affected by the drinks, approached Ethan with a radiant smile.
—There’s a pool!—she said excitedly—I need a swim, and you do too.
—Susan, I think you've had enough to drink—Ethan responded cautiously, noticing the peculiar gleam in his wife’s eyes.
—Oh, come on! Don’t be boring.—Without waiting for a response, she grabbed his hand and pulled him toward the pool.
Ethan, surprised by the gesture, felt a strange warmth rise to his face. It was something so simple, but it had been so long since he felt that spontaneous connection with Susan. Was he blushing?
When they reached the pool, the atmosphere was completely different: laughter, softer music, and a group of young people enjoying the water under the colorful lights. Susan, without a second thought, jumped into the water, while Sergio stood at the edge, watching her.
—Ethan, come on!—she shouted, splashing him playfully.
He sighed, finally giving in, and stepped into the water. However, just a few minutes later, Susan moved away again, leaving him alone.
Ethan got out of the pool, drying himself off while looking for Susan in the crowd. That’s when he noticed Elijah, standing near a table, looking at him with a smile that seemed more calculated than friendly.
—Hey, Joshua…—Elijah said, walking toward him—Sorry for what I said earlier, about “adjusting to the new.”
—No problem—Ethan replied, though his tone made it clear he didn’t believe the apology—Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm looking for someone.
But Elijah placed a hand on his shoulder, stopping him.
—Wait, let me explain why I said that.
With a mix of suspicion and curiosity, Ethan decided to follow him. Elijah led him to a room downstairs and closed the door behind them.
—So, what’s this about?—Ethan asked, crossing his arms.
Elijah didn’t answer right away. Instead, he got closer, his eyes locked on Ethan’s.
—You know, Joshua... there’s something about you tonight. Something different.
Before Ethan could react, Elijah surprised him by leaning in to kiss him. Elijah’s lips met Ethan’s, and for a moment, Etnan was frozen. He had never kissed a man, nor had he ever imagined being in this situation. Why wasn’t he pulling away?
Finally, he reacted and pulled back abruptly, his heart pounding.
—What the hell are you doing?—he said, breathless, as he stepped back toward the door.
Elijah showed no remorse, just a mysterious smile.
—Maybe… Joshua isn’t as different as you think.
Without responding, Ethan hurriedly left the room, determined to find Susan.
When he finally found her, what he saw left him stunned. Susan, in Alex’s body, was standing close to a young woman, talking in a way that was far too familiar. The girl was laughing while Susan touched her arm, as if she were flirting.
Ethan furrowed his brow as he watched them both head upstairs.
—Susan! —he called, rushing after them.
Susan stopped, turning to face him with an annoyed look.
—What now?
—What are you doing? —Ethan demanded, trying to stay calm—. This is not the time to pretend to be someone else.
—Oh, please, Ethan —Susan replied, crossing her arms—. We're stuck in this absurd situation, what does it matter?
—It matters because we need to take care of each other and stick together. The best thing is that we leave now.
Susan glared at him, shaking her head.
—Do you always have to ruin everything? For once in my life, I just want to have fun.
Before Ethan could respond, Susan turned around and left with the girl.
Frustrated and angry, Ethan decided he’d had enough. He returned to the changing room, grabbed his clothes, and left the party without looking back.
Back at the apartment, Ethan locked himself in the small room he was now occupying, throwing himself onto the bed with a sigh of exhaustion. He waited, phone in hand, for a call or message from Susan, but nothing came.
As he tried to calm himself, his mind drifted back to the kiss from Elijah.
Why didn’t I pull away sooner? he thought, bringing a hand to his lips. He’d never kissed a man before, but there was something about that moment… something that unsettled him.
—I’m not gay… —he murmured, as if trying to convince himself.
Still, he couldn’t ignore what he had felt. Was Joshua gay? The idea troubled him, but it also stirred a strange curiosity.
With conflicting thoughts and emotions, he closed his eyes, and eventually, exhaustion overtook him.
The sound of the alarm clock vibrated softly, and Ethan opened his eyes, hoping everything had returned to normal. But it hadn’t. He was still in Joshua’s body. He glanced at the clock: 11:15 a.m.
He got up sluggishly, running his hands over his face and walking toward the bathroom to do his morning routine. As he washed his hands, an unmistakable smell hit his nose: food. Who was cooking?
When he reached the kitchen, he found Susan, still in Alex’s body, preparing what looked like a balanced breakfast: eggs, avocado, oatmeal, and a protein shake.
—Good morning, “J-Machine”! —Susan said with a smile, using a nickname that seemed to belong to Alex for Joshua.
Ethan frowned at the use of the nickname but decided to ignore it.
—Good morning… —he replied as he sat down at the small kitchen table—. Do you feel alright after last night?
Susan shrugged.
—Yeah, nothing a shower and coffee can’t fix.
—Well, I wanted to talk about what happened at the party…
—About what? —Susan asked, not looking at him as she served a plate.
—About what you did —Ethan insisted—. You drank too much, flirted with a girl, and then left with her. What the hell were you thinking?
Susan briefly looked at him, then returned her attention to her phone, typing messages and smiling as though she wasn’t in the middle of a serious conversation.
—Yeah, yeah… I’m sorry. Do you want avocado or double oatmeal? —Susan said indifferently.
—Susan, listen to me! —Ethan exclaimed, tapping the table gently to get her attention.
Finally, she looked up, slightly irritated.
—What? What did I do wrong now?
—Everything! —Ethan replied with frustration—. You’ve been acting like this is all a game. Not just last night, but always. Even when we were in our original bodies.
Susan frowned, setting her phone aside.
—What do you mean?
—I mean you and I have been distant for years —Ethan confessed, his tone more serious—. But last night, while I was trying to take care of you in that body, I felt something… something I haven’t felt in years. That connection we had when we were younger.
Susan looked at him in disbelief, then let out a sarcastic laugh.
—Connection? Or are you confusing things? Are you gay now?
—What? —Ethan asked, surprised by the question.
—Yeah, because all of this sounds weird. You’re telling me you felt “something” for me while I’m in Alex’s body. What’s going on, Ethan? Are you falling in love with your friend son?
Ethan opened his mouth to respond, but the words didn’t come immediately.
—It’s not that… —he murmured finally, averting his gaze—. It’s more complicated than that.
—More complicated? —Susan repeated, raising an eyebrow—. I don’t know what’s going on with you, but I hope this isn’t about the kiss with Elijah or something like that.
Ethan suddenly stood up, pushing the chair aside.
—You know what? Forget it. I don’t know why I try to talk to you. You always avoid everything, even now that we’re not ourselves.
—Where are you going? —Susan shouted, raising her voice.
—Anywhere where I don’t have to deal with you —Ethan responded, leaving the kitchen and leaving Susan with an expression of confusion and anger.
As he walked toward his room, his thoughts swirled in his mind. Was Susan right? Was he confusing his emotions? Between Elijah’s kiss, Joshua’s body, and his accumulated frustration, nothing seemed to make sense.
Days passed in which Ethan and Susan barely spoke to each other. The resentment from breakfast still lingered, and each one had opted to focus on their own routines. Susan, in Alex's young and athletic body, had become the life of the gym; always surrounded by people, she generated glances and conversations wherever she went. Meanwhile, Ethan preferred to isolate himself in the apartment, playing video games and reflecting on what had happened at that party.
The image of Elijah continued to haunt his mind, especially the kiss they shared. Ethan felt confused, as if that experience had awakened something in him, something he still couldn't fully understand.
On the fifth day, finally, something changed. Tired of the awkward silence, Susan approached Ethan in the living room while he was playing.
—Can we talk? —she asked, in a softer tone than usual.
Ethan paused the game and looked at her, hesitating for a moment.
—I suppose so.
Susan sat next to him, settling into the couch.
—I want to apologize. Not just for what happened at the party, but… for everything. For how things have been between us, even before this strange exchange.
Ethan watched her, surprised by her sincerity.
—I’ve messed up too. I’ve been too wrapped up in myself… and, well, you saw what happened that night. I shouldn’t have scolded you like that.
—No, you were right —Susan admitted—. I’ve always been the type to avoid things instead of facing them. But after all this… I think it’s time to change, for Dylan. Although now, technically, he’s our best friend.
They both chuckled lightly, easing some of the tension.
—For Dylan —Ethan said, raising his fist.
—For Dylan —Susan repeated, bumping her fist against Ethan's.
For a moment, silence settled again, but this time it wasn’t uncomfortable. There was something in the air, a connection they both felt but didn’t know how to express. Susan looked at him with a mix of curiosity and nervousness.
—Can I ask you something? —she said.
—Sure.
—What happened with Elijah?
Ethan sighed and looked away.
—It was strange. I don’t know why he did it… but when he kissed me, I didn’t hate it.
Susan looked at him intently, processing his words.
—You didn’t hate it?
—No. In fact, I think… I liked it.
The atmosphere grew more intimate. Susan placed her hand on Ethan's, and he looked directly at her for the first time in days.
—Maybe all of this is a sign —Susan whispered—. A way to show us that we don’t have to cling to who we were before.
Ethan nodded, and before he could respond, Susan leaned in toward him. It was a soft kiss, filled with a mix of nostalgia, curiosity, and something new that neither of them had ever felt before.
What started as a kiss soon turned into something more. Their bodies, although not their original ones, seemed to fit in a way they had never imagined. They surrendered to the moment, leaving behind the doubts and conflicts that had separated them for so long.
Days later...
Life went on. They hadn’t returned to their original bodies, but it no longer seemed to matter. Ethan and Susan had decided to stop searching for the old woman and, instead, embrace this new opportunity to get to know each other from a completely different perspective.
Dylan, still on the cruise, was completely unaware of what had happened between them, but he would surely find out when he returned. In the meantime, Susan and Ethan found a new routine, learning to live with their new realities and with a relationship that, although unexpected, had given them a new perspective on what it meant to be partners, friends, and companions in this surreal experience that they now called life.
The end
#body swap#age regression#straight to gay#gay to straight#female to male#fantasy#gay#personality change#mental change#reality change#male tf#male body swap#male to female
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Can we get a blurb into the burrow family ten years later (5 kids 😮💨🤓)
i forgot that the ask said 5 kids so just... pretend LMAO
the house is full of life on a crisp autumn morning, the kind of chaotic warmth that feels like a hug. sunlight streams through the windows, catching the dust motes in the air as jj barrels down the hallway, still in his pajamas, clutching a football. “dad! let’s go! you promised you’d show me the new play!”
joe leans back in his chair at the breakfast table, a steaming mug of coffee in one hand, the other resting casually on the arm of rosie’s chair. “slow down, buddy,” he chuckles, watching as jj skids to a stop in socked feet. “i haven’t even finished my coffee yet.”
“you said after breakfast!” jj insists, the determination in his voice unmistakably burrow-like.
across the table, gigi is meticulously slicing her waffle into tiny, perfect squares, completely unfazed by her brother’s energy. “maybe you should finish your math homework first,” she says with the air of an older sibling who knows how to push just the right buttons.
jj scowls, clutching the football tighter. “maybe you should—”
“enough,” you cut in, sliding a plate of toast in front of joe before smoothing a hand over jj’s messy hair. “dad’s not going anywhere, jj. let him finish his coffee, and then you two can go outside.”
jj groans but relents, plopping into his seat with a dramatic sigh.
rosie, ever the peacemaker, looks up from her art project at the end of the table. “maybe you can help me pick the colors for the sunset, jj. you’re good at that.”
joe exchanges a glance with you, the corner of his mouth quirking up in that way that says he’s savoring the moment. this is your life now—kids with strong opinions, a kitchen table full of crumbs and crayons, and a husband who somehow still looks at you like you’re the best thing that ever happened to him.
“okay,” joe says finally, setting his coffee down and pushing back from the table. “let’s see this new play, jj. but only if you promise to run it right this time.”
jj is out of his chair before joe even finishes the sentence, his excitement palpable. you watch as they head toward the backyard, jj talking a mile a minute, joe nodding along like he’s absorbing every word.
rosie sets down her paintbrush, a thoughtful look on her face. “do you think dad will ever let me tackle him?”
“not a chance,” gigi says dryly, not even looking up from her waffles.
and just like that, the morning continues, a blur of small moments that add up to something much bigger—a life, a family, a kind of love that fills every corner of the house.
later that night, the living room is bathed in the soft glow of the tv, the familiar theme song of modern family playing over the hum of quiet chatter. it’s your usual spot on the couch—joe stretched out at one end, jj perched on the floor by his feet, and you sitting cross-legged with rosie between your knees as you carefully braid her hair. gigi’s sprawled out next to you, legs draped over joe’s lap, mid-sentence about some friend-group drama that seems, to her, like the end of the world.
“...and then she uninvited me from the sleepover because she thought i was talking about her behind her back. but i wasn’t—it was all kayla, and kayla knows it, but she’s just letting me take the blame because she doesn’t want to deal with it,” gigi finishes in a huff, crossing her arms over her chest.
“sounds like kayla’s got you all figured out,” jj pipes up, grinning from ear to ear. “i mean, who wouldn’t blame you? you’ve got that guilty face.”
gigi glares at him, throwing a pillow in his direction. “oh, please. like you’d even understand. you don’t have friends, jj. just teammates.”
“and they’re all drama-free,” jj retorts, dodging the pillow easily. “unlike you, miss ‘kayla said this, and emily said that.’”
“boys are so annoying,” gigi mutters, turning to you with an exaggerated eye roll. “right, mom?”
you suppress a laugh, securing the last strand of rosie’s braid before leaning back. “maybe, sometimes. but, gigi, what exactly did kayla say? like, word for word?”
joe chuckles softly, shaking his head. “let her breathe, baby. she’s already giving you a full debrief.”
“i need the full context,” you reply with mock seriousness, glancing at gigi. “it’s important.”
rosie, ever the observer, lets out a dramatic sigh, her hands folded neatly in her lap. “you’re both wasting your time. kayla’s clearly not a good friend, and gigi should just find new ones.”
“thank you, rosie,” jj says, raising a hand for a high-five. she doesn’t even look at him, just shakes her head with the exasperation of someone much older than her eleven years.
joe leans forward slightly, his voice calm and steady as he addresses gigi. “look, if kayla’s blaming you for something you didn’t do, you’ve got to talk to her. be honest, but don’t go in ready to fight. people are a lot more likely to listen if you stay calm, even when they’re not.”
gigi considers this for a moment, chewing on her bottom lip. “yeah, maybe. but what if she doesn’t believe me?”
“then it’s on her,” joe says simply, leaning back again. “you can’t control how she reacts, but you can control how you handle it. and honestly? you’ve got nothing to prove to anyone but yourself.”
you reach over, brushing a strand of hair behind gigi’s ear. “your dad’s right. and if all else fails, remember—your family’s always on your side. even jj, as annoying as he is.”
jj groans in mock protest, throwing his hands up. “hey, i was being helpful.”
rosie raises an eyebrow. “if by ‘helpful,’ you mean ‘a pain,’ then sure.”
the room dissolves into laughter, gigi nudging jj’s shoulder while rosie shakes her head like she’s too mature for all of this. joe catches your eye, a soft smile tugging at his lips, and for a moment, it feels like the rest of the world doesn’t exist—just your family, this house, and these little pockets of chaos that make it all worth it.
↳ make sure to check out my navigation or masterlist if you enjoyed! any interaction is greatly appreciated !
↳ thank you for reading all the way through, as always ♡
#joe burrow#joe burrow imagine#joe shiesty#joe burrow bengals#cincinnati bengals#joeyb#joe burrow fan fic#joe burrow x reader#joe burrow smut#joe burrow x y/n#joe burrow x you#joe burrow x oc
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— summary: kook princess. kook prince. perfect match, right? wrong. you hated rafe cameron and everything he stood for. and he hated you. so when your fathers spring it on the two of you that they’d arranged for the two of you to be married, both of your worlds are flipped upside down.
— CW: strong language, forced/arranged marriage, kissing, slight sexual tension, alcohol consumption.
— note: so sorry for how long this has taken me. i’m still unsure how i feel about it but i refuse to scrap it again. feedback is very appreciated! likes, comments, reblogs!
prev parts: one, two
series masterlist ⤑ taglist form
2 days later…
Y/N
It’s been two days since the encounter with Rafe at the Country Club, and it’s all I’ve thought about. He was drunk, that’s what I’ve been telling myself. He was drunk, and he didn’t actually mean any of the shit he’d said to me. Rafe hated me, just as much if not more, as I hated him.
I needed to shove his face, and the way he looked at me that night, down. I needed to get my head on straight, because tonight… Tonight I had to glue myself to his side and pretend to be happy. Pretend that I was madly in love with my future husband, pretend we didn’t despise one another.
But as much as I tried, I couldn’t. I couldn’t get the look of pure lust he’d had on his face that night out of my head. I couldn’t get the way his hands grabbed at my body out of my head. I couldn’t get the things he’d said out of my head. He was stuck there… Almost like he’d wanted to insert himself deep into my mind and make me trip over myself, wondering, waiting… Did he mean what he said?
I squeeze my eyes shut, hearing his low and raspy voice at the back of my mind.
“Baby, you’re going to be crawling on your hands and knees begging for me to touch you. To kiss you. To please you. You can act like you hate me now, Lord knows I can’t stand you. But even I can admit, you’re fucking gorgeous. And I know you find me somewhat attractive.”
Fuck. What is he doing to me? He is attractive, but I’d never admit that out loud. He’s a fucking douche, and he knows that. I just wish this could be easy, I wish I was being forced to marry someone I somewhat like… That would make this a whole lot easier, but no.. Of course my parents would set this shit up with the Cameron’s. My dad and Ward have only been friends for as long as I can remember.
Fuck them, and fuck Rafe. I-
A knock sounding on my bedroom door rips me from my thoughts, and I sit up fully on my bed, crossing my legs and saying, “Come in.”
My door is pushed open, and I’m met by my mother’s eyes.
“Hey sweetheart, you’ve been locked up here all day, are you okay?”
I fight the scoff that wants to come out, not in the mood to fight with my parents today. Instead, I put on a fake smile and say, “Yeah. I’m fine, just trying to keep my energy up for tonight s’all.”
My mother makes her way to the end of my bed, sitting down and placing a soft hand on my leg. I sigh, knowing this is about to be some long lecture I wasn’t in the mood for.
“Sweetheart, I know how you feel about Rafe.. But this is a good thing, okay? I’m sure the two of you can learn to get along, he’s not that bad of a person is he?”
I open and close my mouth a few times, trying to think of what to say, but my mind fails to think of anything. She has a point. He isn’t that bad. He’s just had a shitty life — Well.. To an extent.
His father was known to be a major ass. I’d personally witnessed the verbal beatings he’d given his son, not to mention the few times I’d seen Ward actually lay hands on him. Rafe didn’t know what it was like to be loved and in turn, didn’t know how to love. Maybe things would be different had his mother not passed when he was only eleven, maybe she would have loved him, and taught him how to love. But we’d never know the answer to that.
“Honey? You still with me?”
I lift my head, finding my mother’s worry filled eyes once more.
I nod my head, “Yeah sorry, mom. I’m just tired. How long do I have until the engagement party? I think I might take a nap.”
Standing from my bed, my mom makes her way to my bedroom door, opening it but stopping to answer my question. “You have about three hours, guests will begin arriving in two. Take you an hour nap, then get ready. Your dress is on the back of your bedroom door. I love you.”
“Love you, too.”
She closes the door softly behind her, and I throw myself back into my pillows, letting out a deep breath. I close my eyes, hoping I can take a nap and not dream about Rafe and his fucking hands on me, I don’t want him to have this power over me, but fuck if he hasn’t burrowed his way into my head.
-
RAFE
“Rafe, we’re leaving here in twenty minutes!”
I roll my eyes, looking myself over in my bathroom mirror once more and straightening my tie. I just have to get through tonight, and then I don’t have to deal with her again for another few weeks. I could do this.
She’d been on my mind for the last two days though… That night at the Country Club, and how good she’d looked, how her voice sounded. Fuck, how could I have never noticed her like that before? How could I have always overlooked her?
She was fucking beautiful, and fuck her attitude, and the way she looked when she was mad… It had my cock straining for days. I hated her though, and nothing would change that. Not even good pussy would change the fact that I fucking hated her.
I clear my throat, straightening my tie for the millionth time before finally turning away from the bathroom mirror and walking into my bedroom. I make my way over to my nightstand, opening the top drawer and grabbing out the flask I’d had hidden in there.
Quickly unscrewing the cap, I tossed it back, swallowing as much as I could before screwing the top back on and shoving it back into the drawer, closing it. Fuck, I needed to use some mouthwash before I got into a car with my dad. Last thing I need is him bitching me out for drinking before we arrived at the Y/L/N’s house.
After swishing around some mouth wash, i grab my phone, wallet and keys, shoving them all into my pockets before inhaling a deep breath and letting it out slowly. You can do this, Rafe. It’s just the engagement party.. You still have three weeks until you’re officially married off to her.
I make my way down the stairs with one minute to spare, seeing my dad, Rose and two sisters all standing by the front door waiting for me. I meet all of their eyes, one by one taking in the expressions on their faces.
“Let’s go. Don’t wanna be late right?” I say slowly, pushing past all of them and out the door.
-
We arrive at the Y/L/N’s house within five minutes, their driveway and the sides of the street already filled with cars and the yard all the way into the house filled with people. I swallow nervously, running my hands up and down my dress slacks.
“You okay?” I hear Sarah say from the right of me.
I glance down at her, narrowing my eyes. She never gives a shit about me or how I’m feeling.
“Just peachy, Sare. You don’t have to pretend to give a shit about me.”
She scoffs. “I’m not pretending, Rafe. I couldn’t imagine being in your position, I’m just-”
“Look, I’m fine. Can’t be that bad, right?”
Before she even has the chance to respond, I lean over her, opening the car door and looking at her, my face letting her know to get out of the car. She does just that, exiting the car and smoothing down the front of her baby pink dress.
“If you need anything, you can talk to me. I know we don’t get along, but I am your sister, and I do care.”
It feels like a thousand needles prick at my throat, my eyes stinging from tears wanting to well up, but I don’t let them. Fuck, I need a drink. I nod my head at Sarah, thanking her before climbing out of the Range Rover and slamming the door, slowly making my way toward the front porch steps.
As I enter the house, the sound of music and chatter fills my ears, and I can’t help but wince. I’m used to this sort of environment, lots of people, music, the works. But it’s always people my age, and we’re having fun, not celebrating the engagement of two people who could care less about one another. Every last person here is oblivious to the fact that Y/N and I do not want to be married, fucking ignorant bliss.
I make my way into the kitchen, finding various bottles of liquor on the counter tops. I settle for a bottle of Whiskey, grabbing a small glass from the counter and pouring two fingers, tossing it back and pouring another.
“Do not make an ass of yourself tonight, son. I swear to God if you embarrass our families..”
I roll my eyes, slowly turning to face my father who stands so close to my back I can feel his breath on my neck.
“Don’t worry, dad. I won’t embarrass us. I just need a drink or two so I can get through this shit fest.”
My dad’s eyes narrow, but he keeps his mouth shut, turning and storming off into the house, probably in search of Y/N’s father. Good, hopefully Mr. Y/L/N keeps him off my ass tonight.
I toss back the second drink, placing the glass into the sink before shoving my hands into my pockets and slowly working my way through the crowd of people. A lot of the older men and women stop me, shaking my hand and congratulating me. I guess some people already know why they’re here tonight, shocker.
I approach the foyer of the house, scanning the length of the room when my eyes land on her. She looks absolutely beautiful tonight, shit. She’s making it really hard to not notice her lately. Why? I’ve been around her since we were kids, grew up together, and I’ve never paid her any attention. Why now? Maybe it’s because I’m being forced to marry her, so she’s been consuming my mind, or maybe it’s because Topper hasn’t shut the fuck up about her the last five days, ranting and raving about how “hot” she is, and how I should enjoy her. Maybe he’s right, and maybe that’s why I’ve been so infatuated with her these last few days.
Without even realizing it, I make my way toward her. My soon to be wife. The soon to be Mrs. Cameron, mother of my children.
“Hey.” I say lowly, my eyes scanning the length of her body in the tight fitting white dress.
She flicks her gaze up to my face, her eyes searching mine.
“Hi.” she responds.
I swear I see a blush cross her face, and I don’t miss the way she shifts back and forth on her feet, her white strappy heels clicking against the tile floors.
“So, we’re supposed to stay glued together tonight, shall we?” I ask, holding my arm out for her to take.
She hesitates for a moment before finally linking her arm with mine. A weird feeling erupts in my chest, and I shake my head, trying to shake the weird feeling.
We begin walking through the crowd of people, all eyes on us as we try and find our parents, knowing they wanted to go ahead and announce the engagement and wedding date so everyone can enjoy the rest of their night mingling and drinking.
Finally finding our parents, we slowly step up the stairs and onto the landing, standing between our parents — Ward and Rose beside me, her parents beside her.
Ward clears his throat, clinking a small fork on the side of his whiskey glass and getting everyone’s attention.
Fuck, there are so many fucking people here.
“Thank you for coming out tonight everyone. We have a very big announcement to make.”
He stops speaking, turning his attention to Mr. Y/L/N and letting him continue.
Y/D/N places a loving hand on his daughter’s shoulder, clearing his throat and speaking. “We have invited you all here tonight to announce the engagement of our two eldest children, Rafe and Y/N. We wanted to throw this party in their honor tonight, to celebrate two people becoming one.”
I discreetly roll my eyes. Two people becoming one my ass, more like two being being forced together so two companies can become one…
“The wedding will be in three weeks. Saturday June fifteenth. We hope to see all our friends and family there.”
The room erupts in gasps and cheers. A fifty-fifty of mixed emotions throughout. I notice Y/N’s hand tighten around my arm, her eyes scanning the room quickly. I take note of a few girls I’d slept with in the past, glaring at her. Fuck. I need to do something, these girls will eat her alive, they’ll know this is all bullshit. I need to try and make it seem real, but I don’t think Y/N is going to like my plan very much.
I slowly unlink our arms, turning her so she’s facing me and I cup her cheeks in my hands. She sucks in a sharp breath, narrowing her eyes on me.
“Trust me, okay?”
Her chest rises and falls quickly, but she squeezes her eyes shut and nods her head.
Without a second thought, I dip my head down and capture her lips with mine. The kiss is slow and soft at first, but I quickly deepen it, shoving my tongue into her mouth and feeling her body tense up underneath my hands.
She kisses me back, her body relaxing and melting into mine as the sound of the hoots and hollers slowly fade. There’s no one but us in this room. Shit, she’s a good kisser.
She finally pushes me back, wiping the corner of her lips with her hand and staring up into my eyes.
“What… What was that for?” she asks.
I glance behind her, seeing Jessie and Caraline rolling their eyes but stomping away. I can’t help but smirk at that, Y/N is the only girl I’ve publicly shown any affection towards, and they all know that.
I shrug. “I was saving you from being eaten alive by the bitches of my past s’all.”
She rolls her eyes. “Well, thanks. But I think I can handle a few girls.”
I can’t help but smile at that. She’s strong, she’s tough, and in three weeks, she’s all mine.
“I bet you can, but, you’re welcome.”
Her eyes continue to search mine, her hands shaking at her sides as she continues to stare up at me. God, my cock is painfully hard right now. I just want to take her up to her room and ruin her innocence, but I won’t. I’ll wait until the wedding night, I can wait three more weeks.
“Now, let’s go enjoy this party. It’s gonna be a long night, baby.”
RAFE TAGLIST: @drewstarkeyslut @princessslutt @thatsthewaythechrissycrumbles @sturnioloshacker @starkeysprincess @rafescurtainbangz @atorturedpoetx @redhead1180 @jjsmarijuana @romaescapes @kisses4angel @lovelysturnioloos
#rafe cameron#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe cameron x you#rafe cameron x kook!reader#rafe cameron fic#rafe cameron series#arranged marriage#arranged marriage au#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron angst#rafe cameron smut
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♡︎ part7. hospitals and police reports
・❥・pairing: vi (arcane) x fem!reader
・❥・ summary: while Vi is in the hospital your dad reveals an unpleasant news
・❥・ genre: smut + kinda friends to lovers
・❥・ word count: 1.5k
✎ warnings: hospital, blood, swearing, mention of violence
WHEN I NEEDED YOU masterlist
the following hours were a blur. you remember your screams, the headlights of your dad's car, your mom holding you, the ambulance speeding, Vi's hand, which you held tightly all the way to the hospital, and so many doctors. you spent that night at the hospital, barely getting any sleep or having any strength left.
when the doctor finally came out to see you, the world stood still; you wanted to know what would happen to Vi, but at the same time, the news could be anything, which was terrifying.
“she's a fighter; that's something I can tell you for sure,” the doctor said, holding Vi's medical folder. “she’ll be staying here for a few days - I want to ensure there are no further risks to her health.”
“but she's okay, right?” you couldn’t hold back your worry.
“she’s already doing better; she's weak, but as I said, she’s a fighter,” the doctor said with steady calmness.
“could I see her, please?” you asked, looking her straight in the eye. the doctor hesitated a little, but seeing your concern, she gave a slight smile and nodded. you started thanking her and, for the first time in a while, you smiled.
“sweetie, we’ll wait for you here,” your mom said softly as you entered the room.
you promised yourself you wouldn’t cry. you needed to be strong for her - everything would be fine, and your composure would reassure her. worry and tears wouldn’t do her any good, so you gathered your courage and approached her bed. her body looked weak, and all the monitors around her seemed intimidating. her clothes, too, were unsettling to see, but you kept your reaction in check. the worst part was her face - you had thought it couldn’t be worse than when it was covered in blood, but no. the bruises, the stitched lip, and all the scrapes made it look like a waking nightmare.
“hi, Vi,” you said softly, taking her hand and sitting beside her. “how are you feeling?”
her head turned towards you, and a warm smile appeared on her face. “you look so beautiful, cupcake”
her words caught you off guard; Vi had just gone through one of the most traumatic nights of her life, and the first thing she did was compliment you. “thank you,” you murmured, a bit uncertainly. “but seriously, how are you?”
“like I've been beaten up,” she replied with a small grin, but she stopped immediately to avoid reopening her stitches.
after a pause, you both laughed again. “are you always this funny?” you squeezed her hand tighter. “no matter how bad the joke, I’m glad you still have the energy for it”
you talked for about fifteen minutes until the doctor returned to let you know it was time to go. you didn’t want to let go of her hand, but you had to, so with all the gentleness and care, you kissed her softly on the lips and said goodbye, promising to be back in the morning.
your parents were already waiting for you, and you walked to the car together. the ride was silent; your thoughts were still with Vi in the hospital. all you wanted was to sleep and make the morning come faster so you could see her again.
as the car approached home, your dad spoke up. “I know it’s been a hard night, but I’d like to talk to you”
“alright, daddy, I’ll change and come down to you.”
you quickly took a shower and put on your pajamas, carefully folding your jacket and giving it a kiss, as if Vi could somehow feel it. you felt partly responsible for what had happened today, but you brushed those thoughts aside and headed downstairs.
your dad was already waiting for you on the couch, and your mom stood by the window - she always did when she was anxious, so you knew something was wrong.
“please, take a seat, sweetheart,” your dad gestured to the spot beside him.
“what’s going on? did the doctors say something?” your heart was pounding. “please tell me Vi is okay”
“Vi’s fine; this isn’t about her health right now,” your dad reassured you, glancing at your mom as if he wanted her to continue, but she only nodded.
“I’m so sorry you had to go through this, sweetie. I still can’t believe Troy could do something like that,” your dad said, and you cringed at the mention of his name. you realized you hadn’t even thought about him until now; the last thing you remembered was him lying somewhere on the ground, whining in pain.
“I know what I’m about to tell you won’t be easy to take in, but I need you to stay calm” your dad took your hand, and your face must have shown utter confusion.
“so, Troy’s father has filed a police report,” your eyebrows shot up. “he claims that Vi lured him to the parking lot and assaulted him. I won’t go into details, but the gist is that you cheated on him with Vi, and when Troy wanted to confront you, he got beaten up instead” your dad explained, but there was a ringing in your ears.
“what the hell is that? that’s a complete load of shit!” you shouted, barely registering the words coming out of your mouth.
“sweetheart, that’s not exactly what I meant by ‘stay calm,’” your dad said, clearly displeased with your choice of words, but you didn’t care.
finally, your mom joined the conversation. “your father and I won’t let Troy slander your name, so I want you to tell us everything from the beginning. start with Troy’s party,” she said. when it came to family, your mom never joked. it was one of the reasons you trusted them so much; you knew you were safe.
you talked for another hour, recounting every detail, even the small ones. your dad never took his eyes off you and listened intently. you noticed his jaw clench when you described how Troy had shoved you. when you finished, the room was completely silent, and sadness crept over you, like reliving it all over again.
“daddy, thank you for getting there so quickly. I know I didn’t get a chance to say this earlier, but…” you started crying. “but I was so scared. I’ve never seen anything like that in my life. I’m so lucky to have you” you threw yourself into your father’s arms and felt like a little girl again. no matter how old you get, you always feel like a child with them.
“my precious daughter, you’re the most important thing we have, and I’ll never let anyone hurt you. I promise you, Troy and his father will regret this,” he said, hugging you tighter, and you exhaled deeply.
the next three days passed in the same routine: mornings at the hospital with Vi, then college, and back to the hospital. you spent a lot of time with her, and the doctors said she was recovering well and might go home tomorrow, which had you over the moon with happiness.
in the morning, you woke up, and your dad insisted you pick Vi up together. you hadn’t planned on introducing them under these circumstances, but it was how things turned out. when you arrived, Vi had already packed her things, and the doctor was giving her final instructions. after the doctor left, wishing Vi a speedy recovery, you hugged her, causing Vi to yelp in pain, and you quickly pulled back.
“sorry, I’m just so happy to see you… well...” you hesitated over the words.
“alive?” she laughed, and you rolled your eyes.
finally, your dad approached Vi and said, “glad to see you’re doing better”
“yes, thank you for helping me. I wish we could’ve met under different circumstances,” Vi smiled warmly at him.
“I couldn’t agree more,” your dad nodded. “I’m grateful to you, too, Vi. thank you for protecting my girl when I couldn’t be there. thank you for being there when she needed you." he said this sincerely, and they shook hands.
“I’m sure you’re aware that Troy’s father has pressed charges,” your dad continued, and Vi simply nodded. “I want to assure you that I’m handling this situation personally. I can see how much you mean to my daughter, and this is my way of thanking you, Vi” he smiled, and you felt tears of joy welling up. seeing the most important people in your life stand up for the one you fell in love with was an incredible feeling.
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eddie munson x best friend!reader
summary: a previous request I had to write eddie and a weird girl!reader. edited just a tad for better flow.
cw: none
Eddie watched as you picked up another rock, examining it carefully in your hand before tossing it towards the lake. The two of you had been out here at Lover’s Lake for close to 2 hours now, skipping the rest of the school day after you'd asked him to bring you here during lunch.
The boys laughed at him for how easy it was for you to get him to do anything. But Eddie only gave them the finger as he trailed behind you out of the school. You never asked him for much, so who was he to deny you?
You and Eddie had known each other since he moved to the trailer park to live with Wayne. The two of you fell in and out of friendship over the years as you both went through the motions of life that got you to where you were today.
Sometimes you two were inseparable, and other times you kept to yourself. Choosing to be alone for weeks or months on end until you would knock on his trailer door like you'd just seen him yesterday. Many deemed you weird for your antisocial behaviors, including your own mother. But, Eddie knew you would come back around eventually, and he always welcomed you back with open arms.
With his legs dangling out the back door of his van, he brought a newly lit cigarette in his mouth to chase the joint he had just finished as he watched you do…whatever thing you needed to get out of your system today. He should have known you were going to want to spend the day outside with the overcast that had been looming. You hated the heat from the sun, preferring the shield of the clouds to cover you while you look for different bug or flowers or whatever you deemed worthy to be picked from the ground.
“Oh, Eddie!” Your excited voice had him jolting straight up, greeted by the site of your bright smile before him. “Look! This one’s got a fossil in it!”
Eddie opens his hand for you to place the rock in it. Your discovery stays hidden until you pull your hand away from his. And, sure as shit, there’s a print of some old ass plant or something on the side of the little rock.
“Woah, that's fucking cool,” he says, matching your energy for your find. He hands it back to you and you hold it in both hands, face beaming at your discovery. Eddie likes it when you get like this. The pure, unadulterated bliss that beams from you feels like it could cheer him up on his deathbed.
But after a moment, your expression falters. A crack in the joy of the moment that Eddie clocks right away.
“What?” He asks, looking at you even though he knows you wont give him eye contact back.
“Eddie, why do you hang out with me?”
Eddie reels back. It’s not the first time you’ve dropped heavy questions on him before, but he wasn’t expecting you to hit him with that one.
It was one he wasn't sure how to answer. Mostly because the answer was complicated.
Why was he your friend? Why did he like having you around? Why did it kill him when you distance yourself from him?
Okay, maybe the answer wasn't really that complicated. Rather, admitting it was.
Because the truth is that Eddie is completely head over heels for you.
Ever since he’s known you he knew you were it for him. You never thought that he was a freak for having a dead mom and a jail bird dad. Never judged him for being poor even for trailer park standards. Certainly never made any remarks about his music tastes.
He hadn't always been subtle about his feelings, telling you when you were younger that he would marry you someday. He still gets a kick when he thinks about the way your nose scrunched up at the suggestion.
He would pester you any chance he could, and Wayne had to tell him to not be so forward or else he was going to scare you off. Little did Wayne know that it would take a hell of a lot more than Eddie’s strong personally to push you away. He eventually realized how well you could meet Eddie’s energy, calling the two of you a match made for trouble.
Because Eddie loves when you would barge into his room without knocking to show him a painting you’ve finished. Or when you would tap on his window at 3 am because you couldn’t sleep, knowing he was probably still awake too.
He loved when you would join the Hellfire Club at lunch, telling Grant to move so you could sit next to Eddie’s spot at the end of the table. He loved that you wanted to be around him, and he wanted to be around you just as much.
“Because we’re friends,” he says casually. Your eyes lift to meet his. He can’t tell you how he feels. He can’t risk giving you a reason to run away from him. “It’s been like, what, 10 years now since we started hanging out? Why do you want to know now?”
Your eyes shift down, avoiding eye contact with him once again. You must be worried about something he thinks. He wishes he could read minds just to see what you’re thinking.
“I was just wondering," you say in a tone that tells Eddie you were not just wondering. "Don’t want you to think you’re obligated to hang out with me or anything.”
“What?” He shakes his head incredulously, laughing at the absurdity of your assumption. “I don’t feel obligated. I like hanging out with you. Promise.”
He sticks his pinky out for you to twist with yours, something you’ve been doing since he pinky-promised to be your friend when the other kids said you were too weird.
But you don’t accept it, crossing your arms over your chest and curling in on yourself. Your boot shifts as you nervously roll a rock under your heel. It’s quiet for a moment, and Eddie drops his hand slowly, not liking the way the air is shifting around the two of you.
Something feels off. Final.
“I don’t think it’s a good idea for us to hang out anymore, Eddie,” you say matter of factually.
Forced. He can tell you’re putting on a front, like the one you put on for your mom. He wonders if she’s got something to do with this.
Eddie’s throat feels dry, breathing in through his nose to keep himself together.
“I don’t know why you would think that. Did I do something—”
“No,” you cut him off, looking at him in the eyes for a few seconds before averting your gaze again. “It’s not you Eddie. I just…”
Eddie stares at you with his big brown eyes hoping you’ll give him something, anything to try and fix whatever has you feeling this way.
“Don’t you want a girlfriend?”
Well that was the last thing he expected you to say.
“I’m sorry, what?” He blinks up at you, confused at where this conversation is going. You take a sharp breath through your nose, and huff, brows pinching as you become visibly upset.
“Well you and Jeff and Gareth were talking about how hot the cheerleaders uniforms are, and — and you said that if you had a chance you’d like to see what's under their skirts—“
“Okay, hold on, I didn’t say that,” he says defensively, but you give him a look that makes him back track. “Or, even if I did, I only said it because it was Gareth and Jeff. I didn’t really mean it.”
“I’m not mad that you said it, Eddie. I just," you breath in, a slight hitch in your throat as you do. "…I hear what those girls say about me…about us and…I just feel like…I—I,” you sniffle, “I don’t want to be the reason you can’t get a girlfriend.”
Eddie tries so, so hard not to laugh. Like, he’s really trying to hold it in because you’re clearly very upset. But he can’t suppress wide grin that slowly creeps across his face.
“Sweetheart,” he finally says, “You don’t really think that do you?”
Your only response is a silent nod and Eddie’s heart only grows more for you.
“Trust me, you’re not why I don’t have a girlfriend,” he says with a tone of self-deprecation. It’s not the full truth, because technically you are the reason, just not in the way you think. “Those cheerleaders wouldn’t want me whether you’re around me or not. And it’s not like there’s a line of girls dying to date me or whatever.”
He twists his rings around his fingers, waiting for your response. When he looks up, you’re looking at him like he’s got three heads.
“What?” He laughs.
“Are you joking?” You ask him very seriously.
“Joking about what…?”
“That you don’t have girls trying to, you know, get with you…”
“Oh, no, definitely not.”
A smile finally cracks on your face at his words, and an immediate relief washes over him. The tension in your body visibly washes away and you take a step closer to him.
“Okay,” you say with a soft smile.
“Can I ask why you’re so worried about me getting a girlfriend anyway?”
“Well, my mom said—“
He raises his hand, stopping you mid sentence, “That’s all I needed to hear.”
It warms his heart when you laugh, melting all the worries away. Though, he still can’t help feeling like he could lose you forever at any given moment. It would gut him if you really did decide that he couldn’t be in your life anymore. He already gets sick at the thought of you meeting someone else, someone other than him, and moving on to leave him in the dust.
“Why do you hang out with me?”
He likes the way your eyebrows shoot up when he turns your question back on you. He thinks that he’s got you just as flustered as you had him, but you look at him with a shake of the head as you speak very matter of factly.
“Because I love you.”
Eddie has to catch himself before he can get too excited. This is you that he’s dealing with here. And you could mean that in so many ways; as a friend, a brother, a lover. And, god, did he hope you mean the ladder.
“Love me how?” He asks carefully, trying his best not to sound to excited.
“Like…well, sometimes, when you do stuff that’s, like, really cute or makes me happy, I just want to—“ You bring your hands to his face, something you’ve done many times over the years when he’s going on about D&D or music or even just when he’s reading. He always assumed it was your way of expressing that he was being a bother or overstimulating you, so he would usually stop or change the subject. “—just grab you and kiss you.”
Eddie knows his face has to be as red as a tomato. His heart is going a million miles a minute and he can barely keep his breathing steady.
Holy shit is this happening?
“You want to kiss me?”
You nod, “Yeah, like, a lot.”
“Why haven’t you?”
Your eyes practically bug out of your head, dumbstruck at his words.
“I can do that?”
“Please?” It comes out breathy, meant to be a joke, but almost as a beg.
And so you do. Your soft, mint chapstick covered lips hastily meet his, head tilted ever so slightly so your noses don’t bump as if you’ve done this before. Have you done this before? Certainly not with him. It makes his blood boil thinking that someone other than him has ever gotten a chance to do this with you.
The feeling of your fingers gliding across his scalp, nails skimming in a way that sends goosebumps down his arms. He takes the opportunity to bring his own hands to your hips, pulling you closer to him to deepen the kiss.
When you finally pull away, Eddie leans in to chase after you. And when he finally opens his eyes, he feels sick—lovesick at the sight of your pleased smile. The way you’re looking at him with a sparkle in your eye makes him feel like he could do anything.
“Wow,” you say between the two of you.
“Likewise,” he says with an airy chuckle.
“Can I do it again?” You ask shyly.
“Sweetheart, you can kiss me whenever you want,” he says dreamily.
“Really?”
He hums in response, cut off with a hmph as your lips meet his again.
And again.
And again.
And again.
thank you for reading.
#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson#best friend!eddie munson#best friend!eddie munson x reader#best friend!eddie munson x best friend!reader#eddie munson x weird girl!reader#eddie munson x wg!reader#eddie munson fluff#eddie munson fanfic#eddie munson st#eddie munson blurb
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Single Dad!Eddie x Fem!Reader Series
1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14
Summary: Will's birthday party brings back some familiar faces and gives Eddie the perfect opportunity to make amends with Corroded Coffin, but an unexpected interruption might have him hurtling towards his old ways.
Warnings: some dirty talk (18+ only just in case), drinking/drunkenness (everyone is over 21), pregnancy and labor complications, mentions of past bullying
WC: 8.2k
Chapter 14/20
Divider credit to @saradika Special shoutout to @storiesbyrhi and @corroded-hellfire for helping with the fluffy sections and making this piece strong.
--
Afternoons at Hawkins Preschool are predictable: storytime on the carpet is followed by the kids’ pack-up routine, and once all belongings are shoved into their proper backpacks, they file out the door to go home.
Predictable is good. It’s safe. And it certainly doesn’t include a fire drill half an hour before dismissal.
Herding nine children through the bustling hallways and trying to ensure no one is left behind is overwhelming enough. Factor in the ear-splitting alarm and the surge of adrenaline pulsing through your students once they re-enter your classroom, and you’ve got the perfect recipe for chaos.
Instead of fighting a losing battle to keep the kids calm and quiet, you’d opted to plunk them down with myriad art supplies and called it a day.
Now, after the last student had been picked up, you and Will are left cleaning the mess they’d made. Broken crayons are scattered across the tabletops, there’s Play-Doh of various colors stuck to the floor, and gold glitter—when did you even acquire glitter?—dusts every surface.
“Seriously…who thought that that timing was a good idea?” Will grumbles, tossing a Crayola stub into the crayon basket. He adopts a nasal, mocking tone. “‘What would help out our teachers? Oh, I know—let’s interrupt their dismissal routines!’”
You laugh despite your own exhaustion. Somehow, you’ll have to muster up the energy to tutor Harris tonight.
Will reaches into the cupboard to grab his car keys, turning back around with a smile that he only offers you when he needs something. “Could I ask you for a little favor?”
There it is. “How little?” You cock one brow as you clip a stack of papers together.
“Eensy weensy. Miniscule. Microscopic–”
“The more you say it, the less I believe you.”
“Okay, okay,” Will acquiesces, twirling his keyring around his forefinger. “So, for my birthday thing on Saturday…a bunch of my childhood friends are gonna be there. Mike, Dustin, Suzie, Lucas, Max, Jane…” he lists them, ticking off each name on his fingers. “Anyway, I was hoping that maybe you could talk to Eddie about a Corroded Coffin reunion? I know they’re on a hiatus or whatever, but if anyone can convince him to play, it’s you.”
He’s not wrong; you’re the most likely person to get Eddie to do, well, anything. But asking him to make amends with Danny and Gareth and getting their band to play a gig three days from now seems like a mountainous task.
Will is staring at you, hands clasped together pleadingly. He’s too optimistic for his own good, and you can’t help but give in.
“Fine, I’ll try. But–hey, don’t get excited yet,” you warn when he pumps his fist in celebration. “‘Try’ is the key word here. I’m not making any promises.”
Your admonition goes unheeded as Will already considers it a victory. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!” You give him a small, tight-lipped wave as he dashes out the door. You and Eddie were already planning to attend the party; you’d spent part of last night scouring an art store for the perfect gift. And he and Jeff were back to being thick as thieves…maybe this could work.
“All right, Mr. Harris,” you say with a laugh, hurriedly placing tiles of various shapes in front of him. You need to make the most of the few minutes you have left until Eddie arrives. There’s a soft, familiar flutter in your stomach as you think about seeing your boyfriend, but you know you can’t compete with him for Harris’s attention. “Can you find the…trapezoid?” The inflection in your voice makes it sound like a much more exciting task than it really is, and you hope it’s enough to wrangle his focus.
Harris pokes out his tiny pink tongue as he assesses the tiles. He initially reaches for the blue rhombus, but as soon as his little finger touches it, he pulls away as though it’s on fire. “No…that’s not it.” You tuck your lips into your mouth to suppress your amusement as he thoughtfully taps his forefinger on his lips. A solid ten seconds pass before he triumphantly snatches up the correct tile. “Got it!” he beams, showing off the red trapezoid in his hand.
“You did! You got the trapezoid!” You hold up your hand for a high-five, frowning when he shakes his head. His overgrown curls brush along his eyebrows, and you wonder if it’s your place to suggest that Eddie take him for a haircut. “No high-five?”
“Nuh-uh,” Harris protests, now swiveling his whole body in defiance. “I want…tickles!” He holds his arms out, leaving his torso wide open.
Lips pursed in faux consideration, you lower your voice to a hushed whisper. “Hmm…I think that warrants a visit from the Tickle Monster!” You flex your fingers so they resemble claws; he instinctively scrunches up in anticipation, arms tucked into his stomach. You let out your silliest wicked cackle as your fingers dig mercilessly into his sides in pursuit of his most ticklish spots. Delighted peals of laughter emanate from his chest, and you don’t stop until the buzzer rings, signaling Eddie’s arrival.
Harris’s eyes get wide, mischief dancing behind his pupils. “Do you think the Tickle Monster should get Daddy?” he asks, keeping his voice low despite it only being the two of you.
“Oh, absolutely.” You buzz Eddie in while formulating the game plan aloud. “I’ll grab the pizza and you go on the attack. Once the food is secured, I’ll join you.” You stick out your pinky, and he wraps his own around it.
“Ms. Sweetheart?”
“Yeah?”
“I love you.”
His words turn your heart into a chocolate chip cookie fresh out of the oven, ooey gooey and destined to crumble if handled too harshly. “I love you, too, Harris,” you manage, blinking back embarrassing tears. The flood of emotion is absurd; he probably tells his stuffed animals that he loves them with the same fervor, but you can’t deny the adoration with which he looks at you.
He flings his arms around you in a hug, squeezing tight. Face pressed to your ribs, his words are muffled but still audible when he says, “I don’t know why Daddy says it’s hard to say ‘I love you.’”
He doesn’t have time to further elaborate before Eddie’s knocking on the door. “Special delivery for my two favorite people!” Your heart beats faster with the knowledge that he’s on the other side, that you’ll be able to sneak in a kiss or two.
You and Harris share devious grins, the little boy emulating your monster-esque stance from earlier. He creeps behind you on his tiptoes, and bites back a giggle when you slowly open the door, counting down from three under your breath.
“Hi–whoa!” Eddie stumbles back as Harris barrels into him, little fingers dancing across his lower stomach. You quickly snatch the pizza box from Eddie’s grasp and place it on the table before darting back to where his son has ambushed him. You start on his bicep and let your nails travel upwards until they reach the crook of his neck.
“I’m under attack!” Eddie yelps, twitching this way and that way in a meager attempt to protect himself. “I bring you pizza and this is how I’m repaid?” He easily scoops Harris into his arms, flinging him over his shoulder. Harris lets out an exhilarated squeal, carelessly kicking his sock-clad feet into his dad’s chest. “Jesus, little dude. You’re getting too strong.” Wincing slightly from the pinch in his back as he places the boy on the floor, he gives his tush a little pat and tells him to wash up for dinner, reminding him to use soap and water.
As soon as Harris scampers off into the bathroom, Eddie’s grabbing you by the belt loops of the wide-leg jeans you’d changed into when you got home. One hand slides around your waist and the other finds purchase on your cheek as he kisses you deeply, keeping a listening ear out for the telltale pitter-patter of Harris returning.
“Missed you,” he murmurs into your mouth, and you shiver at the intimacy this closeness brings.
You laugh quietly, biting your lower lip. “We just saw each other this morning,” you remind him, sneaking in another quick peck.
Eddie shakes his head. “Y’know what I mean. Can’t do this while you’re on the clock,” he counters, shifting his grip so both hands rest on either side of your face. You think he’s going to kiss you again, but he just gazes into your eyes. “Shit, you’re so fuckin’ pretty. Couldn’t stop thinkin’ about you today.” He rests the slope of his nose on yours, only snapping out of his trance at the sound of Harris rapidly switching the faucet on and off. “Let me go check on him before this place is underwater,” he whispers, giving your own ass a smack as he shuffles towards his mischievous son, a cheeky grin deepening his dimples.
You do your best to compose yourself, heat creeping up your neck and into your face. Busying yourself by placing pizza slices onto paper plates does little to distract you; it’s as though every neuron is dedicated to flooding your brain with Eddie, Eddie, Eddie.
The way the pads of his fingertips brush against your cheeks when he holds your face. The plush moisture of his lips when he kisses your forehead. The tickle of his brown tresses when he nuzzles into you and takes a deep breath, finally able to relax after a long day.
“Are you expecting a guest?” Eddie pipes up from the kitchen entrance. A perplexed frown overtakes your lips until he gestures to what you’ve laid out in front of you: four slices of pizza, two plain and two with olives, on four plates.
Your vision gets a bit fuzzy with tears when you realize what you’ve done. “No, it’s, um…” Nostrils flare as you huff out a short puff of air, hot under your nose. “Force of habit, sorry.” You’ve been so diligent about only serving three slices, but your preoccupation with his touch had your mind drifting from the task at hand.
It takes him a moment to process what you mean, but when he does, his face falls. It was for Grandma. “It’s okay,” he says, cringing as the words leave his mouth. Because it’s not okay that you’re sad; it’s normal, but frustration still tugs at his heart that he can’t take it away.
It feels wrong to return the slice to the box, so you leave it where it is. Eddie balances the three plates, sliding a plain one in front of Harris. The boy digs in hungrily, sauce caught on the edges of his smile.
“How was work?” you ask Eddie, grabbing a napkin from the pile in the center of the table. It’s a simple question, one that people ask each other all the time, but it stirs up a warmth inside of him. It’s you asking him, fostering a domestic routine that he could follow for the rest of his life. He’d walk through the door of your house, wiping his shoes on the welcome mat you two had picked out together. The kids–Harris, plus another Little Munson or two–would practically knock him down trying to greet him, and he’d engulf them in bear hugs before reaching out to you, kissing your forehead with a murmured, “there’s my girl.”
“Eds?”
“Huh? Oh, yeah, it was good.” He stumbles over the words, trying to clear his head of the fantasy he’d conjured up. “Lotsa paperwork, y’know.” He takes a bite of pizza, chewing thoughtfully. “What about you?”
You shrug, watching amusedly as Harris sinks his teeth into his slice and manages to pull all of the cheese off of the crust in one fell swoop. “The usual. The kids are learning about springtime, so Will decided to do a craft making flowers using finger paint and their handprints.”
“Sounds messy.”
“Oh, absolutely,” you agree with a weary grin, “but it was super cute, and Will is great with all that art stuff.” You excuse yourself from the table to get the water pitcher and three glasses, stopping when you remember your TA’s request. “He also asked me if a certain local metal band could play his birthday party on Saturday…?”
Eddie pauses mid-chew, nearly choking on his food. The cheese seems to congeal in his mouth when he tries to speak. “Um, I don’t know about that,” he finally manages, nervously massaging the back of his neck. “I haven’t talked to Danny or Gareth since…”
“I know, but you said you wanted to make things right with them,” you point out. “Maybe Jeff can test the waters? See if they’re ready to talk to you?”
“Maybe.” He averts his gaze, staring at the pizza slice without taking another bite.
You don’t want to further push the subject in Harris’s presence; instead, you turn your attention to the little boy. “Anything fun happen at school today, Har?”
“Nah,” he responds automatically just a half-second before his eyes light up. “Actually, yeah! My friend Charlie ate a bug at recess today!”
“Ew!” you exclaim, wrinkling your nose in pure disgust, as Eddie simultaneously poses the question, “what kind of bug?”
“An ant,” Harris answers his dad nonchalantly, as though ant-eating is an everyday occurrence. Perhaps it is, which is even more unsettling.
“Did you eat any bugs?” You’re afraid of his response; you’re unsure why you even asked in the first place.
To your relief, he shakes his head, a forlorn look on his cherubic face. “No, I couldn’t catch any in time.”
“Thank God for small miracles,” you mutter, turning back to your original task of getting something to drink. Though if the topic of bug consumption continues, you’ll need something much stronger than water.
Could Corroded Coffin play again?
It’s a thought that consumes Eddie for the entirety of his drive home, barely able to listen to Harris yammering about how there’s a coin in his jacket pocket that he doesn’t remember putting there. He throws a few lackluster mhms his son’s way and hopes he’s too distracted by the mystery coin to catch on.
We’re getting the band back together. Well, if Jake and Elwood Blues could swing it, maybe he could, too.
He waits until Harris is asleep to call Jeff. Getting his son to do his bedtime routine is easiest on Wednesday nights; he’s usually exhausted after a full day of school and tutoring. The one time that Eddie could use an excuse to procrastinate, Harris is out like a light.
Go to voicemail go to voicemail go to—
“‘Lo?”
Shit. “H-Hey, man,” Eddie begins awkwardly. “How’s it going? Viv doing okay?”
“We’re good. She’s ready to have this baby already. I reminded her, ‘just two more weeks,’ but then she told me to ‘fuck off’ until I’m the pregnant one, so…” he chuckles, more nervous than amused. “Everything good with you? Harris?”
“Yeah, we’re fine. Just, um,” he struggles to find the words, blurting out the first ones that enter his brain. They come out in a rush before he can stop them. “Do Gareth and Danny still hate me?”
Jeff takes a sharp breath in; his reaction does nothing to temper Eddie’s nerves. “They never hated you. They were just…disappointed? Jesus, I sound like my mom.”
Eddie misses his friend’s anecdote, too wrapped up in his head to fully pay attention. Somehow, disappointed stings worse than the prospect of being hated, especially when the people he’s let down are ones who used to idolize him. “Do you think there’s a way they could be…undisappointed in me? Like, enough to forgive me and maybe play a gig this weekend?”
There’s an extended pause, and then a one-word response: “Christ.”
Eddie can picture Jeff rubbing his eyes in exasperation, and he scrambles to explain. “Will Byers–you remember him? He was in Hellfire; had that weird bowl cut thing going on?”
“Mhm.”
“He’s having a birthday thing at the Hideout on Saturday and asked if we could play. Just a coupla songs.”
Jeff thinks for a moment; Eddie can hear him drumming his fingers on a nearby surface.
“Why don’t you come over tomorrow night around…6?” he ventures. “I’ll invite the guys and we can…I dunno, figure something out.”
“Thanks, man. I owe you.” He’s about to hang up when he remembers to ask, “Can I bring Harris?”
“Of course.”
“Har, slow down!” Eddie’s barely unbuckled his son’s car seat before Harris has wriggled out of the sedan, bolting straight for Jeff’s door.
“But I haven’t seen Uncle Danny and Uncle Gareth in forever!” he laments, reaching the house far faster than Eddie. He stands on tiptoes and rings the doorbell like a madman, forefinger jamming into the button at warp speed. “Uncle Jeff! It’s me!”
Jeff opens the door with a huge smile. “Mini Munson!” He scoops the boy up into a hug. “What’s new with you, little dude?”
“I got a wiggly tooth!” Harris exclaims, jutting out his jaw and pressing his tongue against the front center of his mouth. Sure enough, the baby tooth moves slightly forward, and he giggles. “Daddy says the Tooth Fairy’s gonna come and leave me a dollar,” he matter-of-factly reports. He peeks his head over Jeff’s shoulder, squealing and squirming out of his grip when he spots the two men sitting on the couch. He flings himself onto the sofa and plunks himself down into Gareth’s lap. “Hi!”
“Hey, kiddo!” Gareth chirps. “You’re getting so big.”
“‘M five now. I had a birthday party because I turned five.” He splays out his palm to offer five fingers.
“Did your friends go?”
“Yup!” Harris beams at the memory. “An’ Daddy an’ Grampa Wayne an’ Ms. Sweetheart.”
Danny furrows his brows. “Who’s Ms. Sweetheart?”
“She’s my almost-mommy. Daddy has to fall in love with her first.”
“Is that so?” Gareth smirks at Eddie. His teasing look is the first crack in the wall that has separated the men for the last six months, and though Eddie is thoroughly embarrassed, it alleviates some of his anxiety.
“Uh, Har Bear, why don’t you go hang out with Auntie Viv while I talk with the guys?”
Viv holds out her left hand, looking utterly exhausted. Her right hand rests on her bump, eyes sending a telepathic message to Jeff that they have five minutes—ten minutes, if Harris behaves well—to come to a solution before she needs a break.
Silence filters into the room as Eddie fumbles to address the mess he’s made. If Danny and Gareth are here, they’re at least willing to listen to him, which is honestly farther than he’d assumed he’d get.
He remembers what Harris said about apologizing; technically, what you’d taught him about apologizing: the act of saying sorry, not merely implying it, makes a world of difference.
“I was an asshole,” he starts. It’s not his most eloquent statement, but it certainly gets the point across. “Not just that night at the Hideout, or at our last practice. I was an asshole for a long time before that. And…I’m sorry.” It feels good to say it; it feels even better that they’re nodding, seeming to believe him. “You guys didn’t deserve to be treated like that.”
Of the rest of the band, Gareth is the one to speak first. “I guess I’m just wondering, why? Why be an asshole to us? We’ve always been there for you.”
“I know.” Eddie fiddles with a thread hanging from his t-shirt, pulling on it until it snaps off. He shoves it in his jeans pocket, not wanting to mess up Jeff and Viv’s place. “Honestly…I’m not sure, but I think it’s because you guys are everything I’m not.”
“What are you talking about?” Danny asks, tone heavy with disbelief.
“In high school, I was the one you looked up to. The person you wanted to be like. And then I had a kid with some random chick I thought I knew but barely did, gave up my dreams of being a musician, and started selling weed again just to scrape by. And here you guys are. Jeff,” he motions to the friend leaning against the sofa’s arm, “you have a baby on the way with the love of your life. And all of you have goddamn college degrees and jobs that you don’t despise and don’t require you to hide from the law.” He shoves his ringed fingers into his jacket pockets, lowering his voice to barely above a whisper. “And I was nothing.”
Gareth scratches at the upholstery with one finger, absorbing everything he’s just heard. “You know we never stopped looking up to you, right?” He gives a short laugh when Eddie’s eyes widen. “Yeah, man. Leaving Chicago so you could take care of Harris? Putting your kid before yourself? That’s pretty badass.”
Danny nods. “Ed, if there’s someone here to look up to, it’s you.” Both he and Eddie visibly relax. Shoulders drop from their hunched positions, thin lips unfurling into smiles. “No matter what you went through, you never gave up. Even if it almost killed us,” he adds wryly, referring to all of the sleep-deprived Corroded Coffin practices fueled by black coffee and pure adrenaline.
“No fancy diploma can teach us how to stand up for ourselves, or how not to take shit from people, or how to be a dad,” Jeff pipes up from where he’s standing. “We learn from you, man.”
Eddie’s cheeks burn at the compliments, unsure how to accept them. He’d walked in expecting to have to beg for forgiveness, and they were the ones reassuring him. It’s now or never, and he forges ahead while he still has the courage. “Do you…can we get the band back together?” Can we be friends again is the underlying plea, but it’s too vulnerable a statement to make. “We’ll keep it low-key, I promise. Work, family, anything comes up…we can cancel or reschedule. And I won’t be a dick about it.”
The three other men look at one another, nod and turn back to Eddie with smart grins and mischievous glimmers in their eyes.
“On one condition.” Gareth crosses his arms over his chest, smirking as he sinks back against the couch. “You tell us all about this ‘Ms. Sweetheart.’”
The Hideout, normally dingy and coated in a film of sticky ale, has been decked out for Will’s birthday party. Helium-filled balloons in every color bob along the low ceiling, vibrating with the thumping bass of the old sound system. Crepe paper streamers–purple, Will’s favorite color–sway gently with the air that rushes in from opening the door. This has to be Marshall’s handiwork, and it brings a smile to your face. If anyone deserves a partner who fawns over him, it’s Will.
You spot him surrounded by a group of people as the bartender slides a row of tequila shots across the bar and into their eager hands. While they’re distracted by alcohol, you take the opportunity to dart towards the backstage area.
Eddie’s there, digging around for his lucky pick. You wrap your arms around his waist, fingers pressed into the soft dough of his tummy.
“Hey, Rockstar,” you murmur against his neck, kissing just below his earlobe.
He turns around, jaw dropping when he sees you in a maroon slip dress. The heels on your feet have you two inches taller than usual, and he has to shift where his gaze normally lands to meet your eyes.
“Fuckin’ Christ, baby,” Eddie practically growls, kissing you deeply. One hand presses against the small of your back while the other grabs the plush of your ass, kneading it in his palm. “You’re so fuckin’ sexy. How’m I gonna go out there and play with you looking like that?”
“I’ll make it worth your while.” You giggle when he offers up a bemused smile. “If you do a good job tonight, I’ll give you a reward.” You let your fingertips graze over the metal teeth of his pants zipper, feeling him twitch at your light touch.
“You’re dangerous,” he winks, delivering another kiss; this time, he gives your lower lip a little bite when he pulls away. His kohl-rimmed eyes draw you in just as they did that first night you’d met, but now you dive into them without the fear of drowning.
A tactful “ahem” from the now-open doorway startles both you and Eddie, having been floating in an embrace that’s equal parts comfort and desire.
“Sorry to interrupt the lovefest, but we’re on in five,” a man’s voice calls from the doorway. You turn around to see the other three Corroded Coffin members standing there, amusement evident in their expressions.
“You must be Ms. Sweetheart,” one of the guys, soft curls resting atop his head, pipes up. His tone is teasing, but not mocking; the nickname is said with admiration and affection. “I’m Gareth, by the way.”
“Danny,” the one with tight, wiry curls offers, giving a small wave.
Jeff just shrugs. “You know me.”
Eddie grabs his guitar, slinging the strap across his body. His pants’ fly is tight, and he wills himself to calm down before it’s time to perform. He hasn’t worried about being hard on stage since he was nineteen, but thoughts of your bodies perfectly melding into each other has him subtly adjusting himself as he turns his back to his bandmates.
“See ya out there, baby,” he says before pressing a quick kiss to your cheek. The brief contact between you has you biting your tongue in self-beration for suggesting that the band play tonight. All you want is to dance with him, allowing the steady flow of alcohol to dull your inhibitions as you pull him impossibly close. Not caring who sees or what they think.
But this night isn’t about you or Eddie. It’s about Will, your TA-turned-friend who has kept you sane amidst your adorably chaotic students and their decidedly less adorable and more chaotic parents. He wanted Corroded Coffin to play his party, and that’s the least you could do for him.
Will’s already teetering between tipsy and inebriated, breath tinged with the scent of tequila as he introduces you to his friends.
“This is my amazing boyfriend, Marshall.” He smacks a wet kiss to the man’s cheek. “And these are my friends from growing up: Dustin and Suzie, Lucas and Max, and Mike and Jane.” His face melts into a sappy grin as he leans on Marshall to hold him up. “You guys! We’re all in looooove!”
“Jesus Christ,” Dustin mutters, rolling his eyes and shaking his head before turning his attention back to you. “Can we get you something to drink?”
Will raises his empty glass. “I’ll take another–”
“Not you.”
You manage to sneak in a quick conversation with Max, Suzie, and Jane before Corroded Coffin starts their set. Max is finishing up her Masters in English literature at New York University, set to graduate in two months. Suzie programs for NASA, and though Florida is a far cry from her home state of Utah, she loves her job. And Jane is a social worker at a local adoption agency, the cause close to her heart, as she was adopted by Chief Hopper years ago.
“Damn,” you laugh, taking a small sip of your vodka soda. You’re having so much fun that you don’t even care that it’s been watered down. “You’re all such badasses!”
Your admiration of their collective girl power is cut short by the sound of Corroded Coffin taking the stage. It’s as though they’d never taken an extended break; just picked up right where they left off. You cheer so loudly that there’s a pinch in your throat, but you push past it. It’s more than applause. There’s so much tucked away in your yell: I’m proud of you; you’re a rockstar; you’re my person forever, if you’ll have me.
“Hello, Hawkins!” Eddie bellows into the mic. There’s no missing the grin on his face. He’s happy. He’s in his element. He’s where he belongs.
“No way!” Lucas exclaims, awestruck as he turns to Will.
“Dude, you got Corroded Coffin?” Mike mirrors his friend’s excitement. He slings an arm around Will’s shoulder and pulls him in for a side hug. “This is fuckin’ awesome!”
“The first song of the night goes out to our guest of honor, Will Byers!” Everyone hoots and hollers as Eddie plays the opening chords to The Clash’s Should I Stay or Should I Go. Eddie told you he remembered that the song was one of Will’s favorites growing up; his older brother had gotten him into the band. Sure enough, Will’s bopping to the rhythm, singing every word, albeit quite off-key.
Corroded Coffin plays a few more songs from their usual setlist, nerves dissipating with each note, before Eddie speaks into the mic again.
“This next one is for my beautiful girlfriend,” he announces, eyes gazing into yours. “Baby, if my teachers looked like you, I actually would’ve gone to class.”
He nods at Gareth, who starts playing an incredibly complicated beat. As soon as you hear it, you feel your cheeks heat up. The rest of the guys join in on their own instruments, and Eddie oozes bravado as he sings.
“T-Teacher stop that screamin’ Teacher don’t you see Don’t wanna be no uptown fool.”
Max leans in to you and whisper-shouts, “I’ve known Eddie for years, and I’ve never seen him so…happy.”
Lucas overhears his girlfriend and adds his two cents. “That’s because we’ve never seen him in love.”
Warmth spreads all over your body, but it’s not from embarrassment. Allowing yourself to believe that Eddie loves you—is in love with you—opens a door you’d deadbolted until the time was right. You hadn’t wanted to rush things, but the jolt of exhilaration following Lucas’s statement means you can’t deny it any longer: you love Eddie Munson. You’re in love with Eddie Munson.
“Got it bad, got it bad, got it bad I'm hot for teacher I've got it bad, so bad I'm hot for teacher.”
Will takes the opportunity to twirl you around, and you laugh as you spin amongst new friends, your drink threatening to spill over the sides as he turns you faster.
“Hey! Thank you, by the way!” he shouts, probably a bit louder than he needs to.
“For what?”
“For getting Corroded Coffin to play!” He jerks a thumb towards the stage, stumbling a bit as he does. He’d managed to sneak another tequila shot when his boyfriend left him unattended to use the restroom, and it definitely shows. “And for, like, being there for me.”
You give him a hug, immediately understanding the full implication of his statement. “I’ll always have your back,” you promise, filled with the mingled buzzes of alcohol and belonging.
“I think of all the education that I've missed But then my homework was never quite like this!”
Eddie jumps off of the tiny stage and into the crowd of nine twenty-somethings, each at various levels of tipsiness, and reaches for you to pull you close to him. He’s sweating from constantly moving around and the stage lights, his fingers slick with perspiration as he laces them with yours. Jeff picks up the rhythm for the lead guitar while Eddie kisses you, soft and slow and sensual. He loses himself for a moment before hopping back up to join the rest of the band.
As Corroded Coffin wraps up their Van Halen cover and stops for a quick sip of water, there’s a small commotion behind the bar.
“Is there a Jeff Reynolds here?” the bartender calls out, phone receiver in hand.
Jeff gives a little wave, eyebrows raised in surprise. “That’s me.”
“Someone named Jess on the line? Says your girl is in labor and you need to get to the hospital.”
“Holy shit!” Danny claps a hand to Jeff’s back and grins. “C’mon, man! Let’s get you outta here!”
Jeff freezes up; hands clammy as he grips the guitar’s neck. “Can you drive?” he asks Eddie.
Eddie recognizes the fear in his friend’s voice. The selfish part of him wants to refuse to take Jeff to Hawkins General. He could easily plant his feet on the stage and keep playing, claiming that ‘the show must go on.’
No, he silently chastises himself, Jeff needs me. He needs me and I’ll be damned if I let him down again.
“Of course,” Eddie says, trying to force a relaxed disposition. It doesn’t matter; Jeff is too overwhelmed to notice the obvious effort.
“Take my car,” you offer, keys already dangling from your fingertips. “Eds, I can take yours and pick up Harris from Wayne’s tomorrow.” It’s easier to swap rides than to uninstall and reinstall the carseat, so you’re perplexed when Eddie shakes his head.
Two words slip through his lips, soft but pronounced: “Need you.”
Dustin catches wind of the situation and insists on watching Harris until you and Eddie can come back home, claiming he needs to squeeze in as much uncle-nephew bonding time as possible before returning to Florida.
“Henderson, it’s late; don’t let him stay up,” Eddie warns as he tosses over his car keys.
Dustin tries catching them in one hand, but they hit the center of his palm and fall to the ground. “But the best part of being an uncle is breaking the rules!” he laughs as he scoops the keys off of the floor. “By the way, I’m not drunk; just a shit baseball player.” Still, Eddie’s sigh of relief is audible when Suzie plucks the keyring from Dustin’s hand.
With Harris taken care of, you turn your attention to your boyfriend. Eddie’s face is flushed pale, and you’re worried about him behind the wheel. “Want me to drive?”
He nods and grabs onto your hand as you lead the two men to your car. Eddie’s doing his best to keep Jeff calm, reminding him that the doctors and nurses have everything under control until he gets there.
“I’m gonna be a dad,” Jeff murmurs, a disbelieving chuckle permeating the otherwise silent car. “Holy shit.”
Eddie can’t help but smile back. “It only gets crazier from here.”
The bright lights of the hospital’s waiting room are anything but soothing, especially compared to the dimly-lit bar you’d just left. You speak to the receptionist, an older woman with a tired smile and red-rouged cheeks, explaining the situation as she pages Jess while Jeff and Eddie take a seat.
Jeff’s voice is nearly impossible to hear despite the stillness of the room. “The baby was breech at Viv’s last appointment.” He clocks Eddie’s confusion and elaborates. “Feet first, instead of the head. If they didn’t get into the right position and the doctors can’t, I dunno, flip ‘em around? They’ll have to do a c-section.” Long overdue tears spill over his lash line, and he makes no attempt to swipe them away. “I just wanna fix it and I can’t.”
Helplessness. It’s a feeling Eddie knows all too well. He spins a ring around his finger, exhaling softly as he considers a response. He can’t say it’ll be alright, because he has no idea whether or not it will be. He and Jeff both know that.
“No matter what, I’m here for you.” Eddie’s gaze flits over to the receptionist’s desk, where Jess has now arrived and is waving her brother-in-law over. “You’re up.”
But Jeff remains in his chair, hands shoved under his thighs as though they’re glued to the seat. “I…I don’t know if I can do this. What if something happens to Viv or the baby? How can I…?” He doesn’t allow himself to complete the sentence, to finish the thought.
Instinctively, Eddie puts his hands on Jeff’s shoulders. He can feel them trembling slightly as his friend heaves another shaky breath. “Listen to me. You’re gonna do this. You’re gonna go in that room and watch your girl give birth to your baby. Because if you don’t, you’re gonna regret it for the rest of your fuckin’ life.” He glances around and lowers his voice. “I know you’re scared, okay? I get it. And once your kid is safely here, we can talk about it. But right now, you need to pull it together and go be a goddamn dad.”
Jeff nods, finally acquiring the physical stability to stand. “Thank you,” he whispers, clearing his throat and wiping the wet stains from his cheeks. He starts towards Jess before turning back to Eddie. “Could you stay until the baby’s born? If you have to get home to Harris, I understand…”
There it is: his out. He can easily use his son as an excuse, despite the fact that Dustin and Suzie were perfectly capable of babysitting him. He can hightail it out of here and never look back. He can crawl into bed and feel sorry for himself for having to step foot in a godforsaken maternity ward again.
“Yeah. I can stay.”
Nearly an hour passes with Eddie’s head resting on your shoulder, relaying what Jeff told him. Identical knots form in your stomachs as the seriousness of the complications sets in. You don’t say a word as he speaks; you just try to shift without disturbing him. The cushion on the chair back, worn thin, digs into you uncomfortably, but you don’t dare move too much. His vulnerability is a deer that will scamper away at the slightest startle.
You think he’s fallen asleep until you feel his soft lips on your cheek, a muffled, “mine?” against your skin. You note his phrasing; it’s careful and unsure, a symptom of being in his own head for far too long.
“Of course I’m yours,” you whisper back, pressing a kiss to his scalp. “What’s got you asking such silly questions?”
“I don’t like this.” It’s an answer and non-answer all in one.
“Being in a hospital?”
He shakes his head, frizzed curls tickling the crook of your neck. His forehead is sticky with cooled perspiration. “Waiting to see if the baby is okay.”
The realization hits you like a punch to the stomach, immediately hollowing you out. The last time he went through this, it was when Harris was being born. You can’t think of anything to say, so you just nuzzle in closer to him and exhale.
“Why do I feel like this?” Neither of you are sure if he’s asking you, himself, or the universe. “‘S not the same. Viv’s not using drugs; Jeff stuck around the whole time…”
“Doesn’t matter. That’s not how this stuff works, y’know?” You adjust your position so you can look into his eyes. The whites are stained red with worry and exhaustion. “Your gig got interrupted, just like when Harris was born. And there's uncertainty now, too. It’s normal for these kinds of memories to get dredged up.” Your palm rests on his cheek, thumb gently stroking the skin as you ask, “can you try to get some sleep?”
“But what if Jeff needs—”
“I’ll wake you up if he needs you,” you reassure him, settling back into the chair. You lean your head against the wall; the heaviness in your eyelids battles the anxious fluttering in your stomach, but it seems as though sleep is winning.
Eddie’s hand finds your forearm, rubbing up and down the gooseflesh that has appeared courtesy of the air conditioning blasting through the building. Shrugging off his jacket and resting the leather fabric over your shoulders, he can relax once he’s reassured that you’re comfortable. He assumes his previous position, using your shoulder as a pillow and falling asleep gradually, body jostling itself awake from the unfamiliar sleeping arrangement. Eventually, you can hear his soft snores; for the first time tonight, he’s peaceful.
You could tell him now, a whisper under your breath that he’s unlikely to hear. I love you, Eddie. I’m in love with you. Your lips part in anticipation, but you snap them shut. You’re delirious and overwhelmed; Lucas’s throwaway comment about Eddie being in love is rattling around your brain. If you say it and Eddie hears you…
You keep it to yourself for now, letting your body rest while still supporting Eddie’s head. Tomorrow is a new day, with a new life brought into the world. Love—if that’s even what this is—will have to wait until then.
The soft pink of breaking daylight streams through the windows when Jeff wakes Eddie up six hours later, shaking him by the shoulders.
“What the fuck?” Eddie grumbles, wiping the sleep from his eyes. When he registers where he is and the potential urgency of the situation, he sits up straight, head filling with fuzziness from the sudden movement. He wouldn’t call the evening restful, but he’d managed to doze off for longer than he’d expected.
“It’s a girl!” Jeff announces, beaming from ear to ear. He’s bouncing on the balls of his feet, bursting with enthusiasm and emotion.
As soon as Eddie’s vision clears, he’s on his feet and pulling his best friend in for a giant hug. When he steps back, he realizes that he and Jeff sport matching misty eyes. “Dude, you’re officially a dad now. You have a daughter!”
“I have a daughter,” Jeff repeats incredulously. His eyes cloud with tears, and he blinks them away as he peers over at the empty seat next to Eddie. “Did your lady go home?”
Eddie swivels around, so caught up in the moment that he hadn’t realized he was alone. She left. She left without me; she didn’t want to stick around and deal with–
“Did Viv have the baby?” Your excited voice penetrates through his intrusive thoughts as you stroll in from the hallway. The makeup around your eyes is smudged; you’d tried to wipe some of it off in the bathroom, but water and thin hospital paper towels are no substitute for makeup wipes. “Sorry, I had to pee.”
Eddie smiles at the sight of you, still wearing his jacket. He hopes his sigh of relief is concealed by Jeff’s exuberance. “A girl. Six pounds, ten ounces.” He shoves his hands in his pockets. “Wanna meet her?”
“Of course!” You and Eddie begin following him down the corridor. “Wait, is Viv feeling up to having visitors?” You’re mildly ashamed to admit that, in your eagerness, you’d forgotten about the baby being breech and the possible c-section.
Jeff nods. “I think my daughter’s gonna be a gymnast, ‘cause she’d flipped herself back around between the appointment and last night.”
There’s no masking Jeff’s pride when he says my daughter, and it makes Eddie want to hug him again. “That’s amazing,” he murmurs. There’s a small pang in his heart, a bead of resentment that Harris’s birth didn’t go so smoothly, but it’s unimportant right now. His best friend just became a father, and he refuses to let his own hang-ups take away from this moment.
“Hi,” you whisper when Jeff opens the door to room 1007. Viv is propped up against pillows, exhausted but happier than she’s ever been before. Your gaze is immediately drawn to the hours-old bundle in her arms. “How are you?”
“Sore,” she replies truthfully, brushing her forefinger against her baby’s closed fist, “but the epidural was a lifesaver.”
“I’ll keep that in mind,” you tease, unaware that your words have Eddie’s heart skipping a beat at the idea of you bearing a little Munson. “Is it okay if I hold her?” You don’t want to intrude on the new mother’s bonding time, but your insides turn to mush when the baby opens her tiny lips and yawns.
Viv carefully places the newborn in your arms, and you gingerly adjust to support her head. Eddie swears that you holding a baby, in that dress, wearing his jacket, is the prettiest thing he’s ever seen. “Did Jeff tell you her name?” Viv asks, stifling a yawn. When you and Eddie both shake your heads, she smiles and glances at her partner.
He clears his throat, suddenly bashful. Eddie forces himself to tear his gaze from the way you smile and coo at the baby and look over at Jeff. “Her name is Nicolette,” he starts, “but that’s a big name for a little girl, so we figured we can call her Ettie, and she’ll kinda…share a nickname with you.”
Eddie’s eyes go wide, convinced he heard incorrectly. “You…I’m her namesake?”
“Mhm,” Jeff confirms, the grin never leaving his face. What neither you nor Eddie know is that they had had a different name picked out, and had fully intended on using it until the first time Jeff held their daughter. It filled him with a feeling of wholeness, of being complete, and it strangely had him thinking of his best friend. Without Eddie taking him under his wing, he might not even be here to experience this.
It was only by chance that he had stumbled upon Hellfire Club during his freshman year. He was running from Billy Hargrove and his posse, who were determined to beat the hell out of him simply because they could, and had ducked into the drama room to protect himself. Eddie had taken one look at his face and immediately recognized the expression of fear and defeat from being incessantly bullied. “You know how to play Dungeons & Dragons?” he’d asked, and when Jeff had managed a nod, he’d pulled up a chair and motioned for him to sit down.
Being Eddie’s friend, being part of something, gave him a reason to keep going. To live. And in that instant, he vowed to teach his child to extend kindness toward any misfits who need a place to be themselves.
“What about Nicolette?” he’d asked Viv. “Ettie for short.”
You turn to Eddie now, continuing the steady rocking rhythm that keeps Baby Ettie calm. “What do you say, Mr. Namesake? Wanna hold her?”
There’s a brief flash of panic that floods through his veins; he hasn’t held a newborn since Harris. He’d always worried about dropping him or tripping and falling. Truth be told, he was terrified until his son could hold his own head up.
It’s similar, but not the same, he reminds himself, shuffling even closer to you so you can safely transition Ettie into his arms. She stirs slightly in her swaddle but doesn’t cry.
“Hey, little lady,” he says, a delicate smile dancing on his lips. “I’m your Uncle Eddie. The coolest uncle you’ll ever have, for the record.”
“Harris is gonna love her,” you add, heart swelling at the imagery of him cuddling up to his newest cousin.
“Babe?” Viv pipes up from the bed. “Can you grab me something to eat? ‘M starving.”
“Yeah, of course.” Jeff turns to Eddie. “Come with me? I think Viv needs to feed Ettie, anyway.”
Viv extends her arms and Eddie begrudgingly hands the baby to her. Ettie’s so adorable and small, and it makes him yearn for the days when Harris was that little. Maybe not the sleepless nights or the lack of head control, but the scent of baby powder, the toothless smiles, the way he would fall asleep in Eddie’s arms to whatever song happened to be on the radio. Harris Munson might have been the only infant to be soothed by Twisted Sister.
The two men make their way to the hospital cafeteria, sneakers squeaking along the freshly-waxed linoleum tiles.
“I, um, I’m really proud of the way you stepped up for Viv,” Eddie says, eyes trained on the floor. “You’re a great partner. I feel like I should be taking notes.”
Jeff laughs, shaking his head. “That's where my expertise ends. I have no idea how this whole fatherhood thing works.”
“Wanna hear a secret?” Eddie leans in, shifting his weight onto one foot. He doesn’t wait for his friend’s response to divulge, “none of us do. We’re just…” he waves his hand aimlessly, “…figuring it out as we go.” And making plenty of mistakes along the way, he silently adds.
“I don’t know how you did this alone,” Jeff puffs out an incredulous breath. “I mean, I know you had Wayne’s help…” he trails off, not needing to further elaborate on the missing parent.
“Yeah, me either, man. I’m just glad I’m not alone anymore.”
Jeff stops walking, turning to face him. There’s the unmistakable look of pride that manages to make itself prominent despite his evident exhaustion as he says, “You really want this with her, don’t you?”
“Yeah, man,” Eddie chuckles. “It’s like, for the first time, I’m not just thinking about just me or just Harris. I’m thinking about us as a family.” The dinnertime conversations, the gentle ribbings, the tenderness that seamlessly weaves itself into vulnerable conversations.
“She’s good for you,” Jeff agrees. “And you love her.”
“I mean, I—”
“That was a statement, not a question. You love her.”
And in a single breath, Eddie lets go of the fear he’s been clutching to like a life preserver. The one thing he hasn’t allowed himself to say aloud because it makes it so real, so fucking real.
“I love her.”
--
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#eddie munson#eddie stranger things#eddie x reader#eddie x you#eddie munson x female reader#eddie munson x f!reader#eddie munson x you#eddie munson smut#eddie munson angst#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson fanfic#stranger things fanfic#fanfic#eddie munson stranger things#stranger things#tui
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Name ✨Stellar the Hedgehog✨
Age Varies based on what age I draw her, but let's say 16!
Pronouns She/Her
Basic Description The product of Project Stellar—a secret government operation aiming to perfect Project Shadow—Stellar is a genetic experiment combining the DNA of the Ultimate Life Form and the fastest thing alive. Designed to be a living weapon, Stellar was born in a hidden facility where she would have been raised to be an unstoppable weapon for the military. Thankfully, Shadow the Hedgehog (with help from Rouge the Bat) discovered her existence, destroyed the lab, and rescued her as an infant. Shadow then went on to begrudgingly inform his long-time rival, Sonic the Hedgehog, of their newfound child, seeing as she was technically just as much Sonic's problem as she was Shadow's. From there, the duo (along with help from their friends) raised Stellar as their daughter, sheltering her from the knowledge she was created to be a force of destruction for her masters. Along the way, Sonic and Shadow found themselves truly falling for one another, dissolving the barriers they had placed between one another as rivals, finding new appreciation for each other in their new parental roles.
Stellar herself is a bright, warm-hearted person. She has a strong sense of justice and never shies away from standing up for what is right. She takes after Sonic in personality, always cracking jokes and finding it hard to sit still. Despite this, she inherited Shadow's finesse and ability to plan out her choices, not to mention his abilities to utilize chaos energy. She has a love for figure skating, ballet, and make up (thanks to Auntie Rouge!), but don't let her feminine side fool you, she is not afraid to get her hands dirty! She would love nothing more than to spend her day smashing badniks into the ground with her skates if her dads would let her! Stellar loves both of her parents dearly, but sometimes wishes that they wouldn't be so protective of her. After all, what could they possibly have to be worried about?
Extra ✨Stellar's favorite color is red. ✨Her favorite food is chili dogs. ✨She is bisexual. ✨Her favorite flower is lavender, because it reminds her of home! ✨She learned how to skate from Shadow. ✨She calls Shadow "papa" and Sonic "dad". ✨She desperately wants to make her family and friends proud. ✨Her best friend is Camellia the Cat, the daughter of Blaze and Amy. ✨She loves racing Sonic, but is frustrated he always lets her win. ✨She can be VERY impulsive when angered, much like both of her parents! ✨She is SUPER dense when it comes to romance. She has no idea ✨Camellia has been in love with her since they were little! ✨The inhibitor rings she wears keep her powers under control, but they also prevent her from truly mastering them. ✨Her powers are designed after collapsing stars/black holes. Extremely destructive to both herself and everything around her. ✨She has no awareness to the extent of the latent power inside her.
#my art#sonadow#shadonic#sonic the hedgehog#shadow the hedgehog#shadow#sonic#stellar the hedgehog#fan kid#fan child#sonic oc#character ref#sonic prime#sonic art#sth#sonic fandom#sonic x shadow#shadow x sonic#sonic x shadow generations#sa2#fankid au
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Pick a pile
What will your summer be like
1. 2. 3.
Pile 1
Summer is going to be a big resting time for you the past few months or year has been very hard on you mentally, emotionally physically also stress and anxiety your finally getting the rest you need and healing. I definitely see you having fun with family and friends going to parties or events. I see a wedding for some. Your summer will be very balanced your not inside to much but your also not outside to much you feel very content. You may feel sad sometimes not “sad sad”but like calm sad. You may be in the puppy love stage in a relationship this summer starting a new relationship it feels very dreamy “ I want this to last forever energy”. There may be some type of misunderstanding or miss judgment here something not clicking. The color purple may significant.
Thank you for reading loves! 🤍
Pile 2
This summer is going to be very important and significant to you definitely one to remember. I definitely see a man idk if this is your dad or boyfriend just a manly figure but they are coming through very strongly in this reading. You may be working a lot this summer getting your finances right and money up. You’re definitely balancing something out gaining clarity seeing something through another perspective. You’re staying calm focusing on yourself. Self love if definitely important. I feel like there was Something that hurt you cheating, mind games, lying and this person is very head strong. There will a successful outcome you this problem tho. Family is definitely important to you maybe not even on a physical level but you do “keep the family close” if that makes sense. You also will be listening to a lot of music.
Thank you for reading loves! 🤍
Pile 3
I definitely get a lot of love and relationship. You may be getting in a relationship or be in one a the moment. If not a relationship a really close friend. You and this person share a lot of hobbies and interests so you may be doing these things a lot. This summer will definitely deepen this relationship to the next level. You’re moving forward in life taking the next step to being successful. You may be changing a lot mentally being a better version of yourself You’re becoming a more patient, loving and grounded person. This change may feel risky or uncomfortable but it’s needed. You may be needing to watch your money closely what’s coming in and out yeah it’s crazy that I got 4 cards back to back about money so just take care of your money I do see it being a physical person is the reason you might have money missing or something but I do see it being preventable.
Thank you for reading loves! 🤍
#pick a card#pick a photo#pick a picture#pick a pile#pick an image#tarot cards#tarot deck#tarot reading#tarotblr#tarotcommunity#pick a reading#pick a deck#pick a crystal#pick a number#free tarot#daily tarot#tarot
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