#stranger things character analysis

[stranger-feathers]

The Byler miscommunication in Season 4, and why I find it so interesting

This is a continuation/inspired by what I said in this post, you can think of it as a preview of this.

Miscommunication plots are usually hated in fiction, and it's easy to understand why. They're often trite and uninteresting, only existing by chance and contrivances to create pointless conflict. We all have seen that scene where a character walks in or out, at the exact wrong moment, and ends up making up a completely outlandish scenario, or completely misinterprets someone's intention while we're left sighing and hoping for the end. It's annoying, everyone hates it, but we all live with it regardless. You may then ask : why do I like the miscommunication conflict used in ST4 so much if I normally hate them ?

At its core, it is a miscommunication conflict, there's no real denying it. Mike and Will are somehow both convinced the other doesn't care anymore, despite the audience knowing that this assumption doesn't make much sense. The interesting part though is why they end up thinking so. Buckle up, and let me tell you a story of why this conflict was actually very well done on the part of the writers.

1) Backstory : Mike & Will's relationship before the conflict (S2 and before)

Mike and Will are presented as a special pair from the beginning of the show, I don't think this needs to be demonstrated here (there are countless analysis that have done so better than I ever could). During Season 2, we are shown a Mike who is constantly looking out for Will, and reaching out in ways that others do not. He tries to call the Byers' house to check up on Will when he misses school, and, most importantly, he's the only one who actually goes there to find Will when calling does not work. Put a pin on that, Mike going to see Will when calling fails will come back. This motif of Mike reaching out to Will is so fundamental that it is highlighted as being the very way they became friends. They were both alone and Mike reached out : "And I just walked up to you and… I asked. I asked if you wanted to be my friend."

(he's such a sweetie pie sometimes).

Mike is the leader of the group, and it really shows in this tendency to initiate things. It's easy to realise that, early in the series (and presumably before as well), Mike makes the plans to hang out. The writers use the D&D games to showcase that fact : they happen at his house, and he is the DM. He prepares them for weeks and clearly puts efforts into them, all so his friends can have fun with him. He initiates things and expect others to answer present : that's simply how he prefers to communicate. But what does that have to do with Will ?

Will as a character is reached out to in a lot of his interactions. The plot of Season 1 is heavily focused on reaching out to Will stuck in the Upside Down, be that with Joyce's lights or with El's powers (the talkies and the void both). Here, Joyce and El are allies in communication, and El particularly so where Mike is concerned. Put a pin on those two, they'll also come back (less positively unfortunately). However, Will as a character rarely initiate interactions. Will seems to strugle with opening up if the people around him don't make an active effort to reach out, which is why we so often see Jonathan and Mike actively asking him if he's okay and initiating their scenes. That's why Mike is such a good fit for Will : he knows how to coax him out of his shell and reach out, which Will treasures immensely.

The other side of the coin then is : why does Mike treasure Will ?

Will seems to be one of the rare characters to react positively to Mike being vulnerable, and one of the rare characters Mike opens up to in the first place. After all, most of his overtures of closeness with Nancy are rebuffed, his relationship with his mother is in an awkward middle ground between apparent care and lack of good worded communication, his friendship with Lucas tends toward confrontation in early seasons... Mike apparently struggles with expressing himself and his vulnerable emotions fully. Or well, he would, if it wasn't for Will, or so the show implies.

If we take the crazy together scene as an example of their usual friendship (which is up for debate, but I usually assume it to be the case), Mike feels comfortable enough with Will to calmly express his feelings towards El and her death, and they manage to meet each other in the middle, ending the scene with the mutual declaration that they'll go crazy together. This is a question initiated by Mike : Will is simply the one answering it. However, this exchange still puts Will in a pretty restricted and cherished category for Mike : someone who answers positively to Mike's overtures of closeness and vulnerability.

Interestingly enough, Mike asserts in that scene that El would understand too : after all, she's the one who understood him in Season 1, when Will was unreachable. Sadly, we see that understanding diminish with time, leaving Mike more and more isolated : two examples that come to mind would be the "blank makes you crazy" scene (where El fails to answer Mike correctly) and the complete shutdown of his attempt to empathise about being bullied during their Season 4 fight. (This is mostly a tangent, but it fits the overall theme of this analysis so I'll let it stay here)

Will answering positively to Mike's reaching out is also the one thing Mike chooses to highlight about their dynamic during Will's possesion, proving how deeply appreciated Will's answers are : "And you said yes. You said yes."

As Mike says : "It was the best thing I've ever done". Letting himself be vulnerable with Will, and Will reacting positively, was the best thing ever for 13 year-old Mike.

Do note that I'm French and the French version is specifically "[you saying yes] was the best thing that ever happened to me", which supports my point here even better. That probably colors my perception of this scene, but the underlying idea is still there in English in my opinion.

And Will rewards Mike being vulnerable again by responding extremely positively : he starts tapping in Morse code, an answer to Mike's desperate reaching out.

Now that we've layed out the ground work for how they work at their best, let's see what happens when this dynamic falls apart.

2) The big conflict : Season 3's fallout

It's summer of 1985, and Mike spends most of his time making out with El. He seemingly stopped reaching out to Will, or at the very least, doesn't do it half as much as he used to. Will, feeling left behind, decides to be the one to reach out this time : he plans a D&D game, the same way Mike used to do. This is Will attempting to clumsily replace Mike in their usual dynamic : if Mike doesn't want to initiate things anymore, then Will will try to do it instead. He quite literally replaces Mike's role as the DM (aka the initiator and planner in D&D), but the game still happens at Mike's : this is, after all, Will's way to reach out to Mike specifically. The others are never really accused of leaving Will behind, and rightly so since they seem to have kept up with him much better.

Unfortunately for Will, that plan does not go smoothly at all. Freshly-broken-up-with Mike is not in the headspace to answer positively to Will's reaching out, and they end up fighting, presumably for the first time in a long time (or ever) if Mike's surprise is anything to go by. Mike digs his grave more and more before realising that he truly fucked up, and decides to try to fix things by, you guessed it, reaching out to Will. He bikes to Will's house under the pouring rain, profusely apologises (not that Will actually hears it, but the intent is there), and keeps looking for Will until he finally finds him at Castle Byers. Unfortunately for Mike, this is too little too late : we never get to see Will's answer, nor do we know what Mike did to apologise once he found him. The conflict is slipped under the rug rather than resolved (as Lucas' discussion with Will in the next episode highlights). What Will learns from this interaction is that reaching out to Mike when Mike fails to do so isn't a solution : it simply seems to make things even worse.

Fast forward to the end of the season, and Will uses D&D to get this point across : "I'll just use yours when I come back. I mean, if we still wanna play." Whatever happens next, Will leaves it to Mike to reach out.

Mike reaches out to Will one last timen before he leaves : "What if you want to join another party ?" And Will answers the exact thing Mike wanted to hear : "Not possible." Both of them end up seemingly on the same page : back to their usual dynamic, smiling brightly at each other with an unsaid promise that things won't change. Unfortunately, things do change, and not for the better.

3) Post-conflict : THE miscommunication (Season 4)

It's March of 1986, and Mike is on a plane to California. We know from the first episode that Mike and El sent each other letters, but we have no information on the communication between Will and Mike. Then comes their first meeting on screen and it is more than awkward.

Will is prepared for a big hug, yet Mike is keeping his distance for unknown reasons. It's obvious something happened on Mike's side between their last conversation and this, but what it exactly is is left up to our imagination for now.

The start of an answer is given in their fight at Rink-O-Mania : "[Mike] called maybe a couple of times [...] meanwhile [El] has like a book of letters from [him]". Whatever happened on Mike's side isn't a one time thing, but a continuous issue in communication between them. Mike seemingly doesn't want to reach out to Will anymore, leaving Will hurt and feeling abandoned by one of his favourite persons. (Jonathan's behaviour in California also does not help remedy that fact, since he has never been as distant from Will as he is this season)

However, a few episodes later, we are given a very strange piece of information by Dustin : "Joyce has this telemarketer job, she's always on the phone. Mike won't stop whining about it." Now why would Mike whine about the phone, if he barely even called Will ? It's not like Mike was calling El, we established both at the end of Season 3 and at the start of Season 4 that they communicate by letters (as Will confirms) and talkies. A plausible conclusion for those two pieces of information is then that Mike did reach out to Will more than Will thought, but just couldn't get through. (this is the conclusion I use in this analysis, even if it has not been confirmed to be the case)

But wait, remember that pin about what Mike does when phone calls don't work to reach Will ? He goes directly to his house. A shame that the Byers moved to the other side of the country then, wouldn't you say ? Mike is therefore left to stew in his hurt feelings, convinced that Will doesn't want to answer like he used to. With that, Mike loses one of the rare persons that he can be fully honest to (and as we've established, El's understanding of Mike is also looking worse and worse as time passes).

The move is an obstacle to the very premise of their communication, and that's what makes it a great conflict. Will feels like Mike doesn't want to reach out anymore, and Mike feels like Will doesn't want to answer. This isn't a conflict that exists in spite of the characters, but because of them.

Speaking of external obstacles to communication, remember that pin we put on Joyce and El being allies in communication ? Well, it's certainly not the case anymore. Here, Joyce is the obstacle that prevents Will from answering Mike's calls. And El is the obstacle that prevents Mike from reaching out by letters. As he puts it himself, "[El] has a book of letters from [him] because she's [his] girlfriend". And Will, who obviously isn't Mike's girlfriend, doesn't need letters.

And with those informations, we can now reconstruct what happened on Mike's first day in California.

Mike is feeling out of touch with Will ("I feel like I lost you") and is therefore awkward as hell. This makes Will think Mike doesn't want to talk to him anymore ("you're not interested in anything I have to say"), which means Will doesn't answer the way Mike wants ("you were rolling your eyes, you were moping, you were barely talking"), which leads to their fight. That whole day at its core is Mike failling to initiate correctly, which makes Will freak out and answer incorrectly : this is them not being on the same wavelength anymore, and a clear indication that their usual dynamic has been deeply disturbed by the last few months (or year, because as Joyce says, we're all time travelers, but especially if you're gay pining for your best friend).

Another very interesting detail to me is the implication that, while Will clearly still cares about Mike, wanting a big hug at the airport, we hear very little about Will's own attempts at reaching out. Mike points out the same thing when they fight : "Well maybe [Will] should've reached out more. Why am I the bad guy ?". And he isn't wrong per se. Will could/should have reached out more. But given their previous conflict in Season 3, and their history of communication before that, Will didn't feel comfortable reaching out. He tried last summer, and it ended up blowing up in his face : once bitten, twice shy. He's waiting for Mike to make the first move, even if that means not communicating at all. Will won't let himself ask more of Mike than Mike is willing to give him, or so he tries to convince himself as a deeply ashamed gay teen in the 80s (he does still get pissy about being the third wheel, which is understandable). It's a very juicy and dramatic series of events, but it still manages to feel very organic to me, and deeply in character. Will is more than understandable, despite being somewhat in the wrong and unknowingly self-sabotaging. Another interesting part is that Will himself does seem to come to the conclusion that he wasn't being entirely reasonable. When Mike comes to apologise, Will attempts an apology as well (quickly shut down by Mike though), because Mike's words made him recontectualise the situation.

In that same apology, they manage to make the first step towards fixing their relationship. Now that the situation allows it, they go back to the exact dynamic that worked out so well for them before : Mike initiates and seeks Will out with an overture of friendship, and Will answers gratefully (even grabbing his painting, the very proof of his love and understanding of Mike).

Later down the line, Will covertly apologises for not reaching out more : "if [I] was mean to you, or if [I] seemed like [I] was pushing you away, it's probably because [I'm] scared of losing you". Since this comes from his speech about the painting, Will's name isn't on those words, but it's still progress for Will to admit and word it aloud, even if it's only to himself.

Besides, feelings don't always need to be said (as they put it themselves "I didn't say it." "You didn't have to"). The painting itself is proof enough for Mike that Will thought about him despite the distance. Mike really needed to know that, more than he needed an apology. Will finds the right answer to reasure Mike in the van scene, and they truly fix their friendship there (for now at least, since Mike has yet to realise Will broke their other rule of communication : "friends don't lie").

This plot is very dear to my heart because both of them have fucked up and hurt each other (and themselves) without meaning to. They acted out of carefully built familiarity with the other's behaviour (but also informed by their unresolved fight) even when the situation itself didn't allow their usual communication to work. That's why it blows up in their face, leading to the Rink-O-Mania fight. But this deep familiarity is also why they're so quick to build their relationship back up, seemingly stronger than ever. This is miscommunication done right folks, take notes.

[queen-of-hawkins-why-ler]

I really hope that Vickie gets her own story and character development in s5. I feel like the writers kind of set her up for failure by only introducing her in s4 and only showing her to us from Robin's perspective. I feel like they could've pretty easily introduced her in the end of s3 after we found out that Robin is a lesbian, and she could've even been the girl that Robin had been crushing on in class. That way, Vickie could've taken more of like an Argyle or Eddie type of role in s4 and we would've had time to get to know her and like her so that the stakes would be higher and we'd want to see her and Robin together more in s5.

Don't get me wrong, I love Robin and I'm excited to see her get a gf, and I'm sure I'll love Rovickie as a ship once we get to know more about Vickie, but for the time being I still prefer Ronance as a ship and I'm much more invested in seeing Mike and Will get together, just because there's been so much more buildup. I wish they'd set up Rovickie since s3 so that they'd actually be able to compete with the Byler hype.

[honeii-puff]

So me and my friend had a debate and it made me realize how you can see which characters are favored by the creators by how much of their backstory (how the grew up, what happened before s1, their family lives) we know of them.

For this, im going to be using characters that got introduced in S1, as they have had the most time to be added onto (almost a decade), plus Max as a shoe-in.

This list would be: The Byers(+el), the Wheelers, The Hendersons, the Sinclairs, the Mayfields, and the Harringtons.

The Byers:

Joyce married Lonnie and had Jonathan and Will before separating (I don't remember explicitly why, probably because he was a piece of shit). Jonathan and Will live with Joyce with no visitation from Lonnie, and are very close. Joyce isn't the most stable parent, so Jonathan helps around, kind of co-parenting Will. El grew up in the lab, and we see all the stuff that happens when shes younger, which makes sense since she is the main face of the show, so she's kind of exempt from this list.

The Wheelers:

On the outside, they're seen as the perfect suburban family, but in reality, Karen and Ted are in a loveless marriage, especially proven in s3 when Karen is having a weird relationship with Billy. The Wheeler siblings have a normal sibling dynamic of shouting and a love-hate relationship, with (this mainly applying to Nancy) the pressure of having to hold up the "perfect family" image.

The Mayfields:

Max's mom married Billy's dad when Max was young (I dont know if they mentioned what happened to her dad or if i just forgot), after Billy's mom had died. They lived in California until they were introduced in s2. Billy's dad is physically and verbally abusive, which has influenced Billy's actions towards Max. After Billy's death, we know that Billy's dad left, and that Max's mom isn't in a good mental state, leaving Max to take care of herself while also coping with her brother's death.

Now lets compare that to what we know about the Hendersons, the Sinclairs, and the Harringtons:

The Hendersons:

Dustin's dad isn't in the picture (we dont know why), and his mom likes cats.

The Sinclairs:

Lucas has both of his parents, who are in a loving relationship, and he has his sister Erica, who he has a generic sibling relationship with.

The Harringtons:

Rich background, Steve's parents are never around, but it's never expressed as to what his relationship with them is like. (Ik he wasn't meant to be a main character and he was supposed to die in s1, but its been a decade, they could have added onto it at any time)

We can also see this in how their trauma affects them

El and Will both have similar "im the freak" mindsets, which gives them the struggle of being able to make new friends and expand their circle. They also have a lot of trauma from the upside down, and El unknowingly blocked memories of what happened with 001 due to how traumatic they were.

Mike was bullied his whole life, which does reflect in his character, making him quick to react to situations rather than analysing them before responding. His trauma doesn't come from his family, but from other people he has been around. With both him and Nancy, it is shown that they both struggle with telling people that they care about "I love you" (Nancy with Steve, Mike with El), probably from seeing how "love" affected their parents.

Max's mental health had a steep decline after loosing Billy, and it is explicitly shown and a large part of her character in s4, so that one needs little explanation due to how blatantly obvious it is.

Now, Dustin, Lucas, and Steve have all been dealing with the Upside Down just as long as the others have been (besides Max), and little trauma is shown from it.

Dustin and Lucas were both bullied like Will and Mike were, yet it doesn't seem to actually affect their character like it has for Mike and Will. Both also have their share of events happening with the Upside Down.

Steve did go through a character arc, but we don't see how trauma has affected him, especially since he seems to be the shows punching bag. He got tortured by russians, almost got shot by his ex, has gotten into fight after fight for these kids, and got dragged to the bottom of the lake by his ankles and proceeded to get strangled and attacked by bats.

And none of them seemed to be affected by any of it.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

If there are any other ST characters you want an analysis on, send an ask!

[stranger-feathers]

Music theory my beloved ! I love nerding over it so I'll yap a bit in support of your point.

I've snooped a little to find the correct english terms, but I've done all of my music theory classes in French so it could still be wrong.

The concept of stopping on the fifth is most often to write what we call a half cadence. This is usually used to give a sense of a question mark, something that has yet to be resolved : it builds suspense and tension. You know that feeling when the first part of a song chorus has to be followed by the second part, or it sounds unfinished and weird ? Most of the time, it's because the first part ends on a half cadence, and your ear wants to hear what is called the perfect cadence instead.

The perfect cadence is the progression from the fifth to the first. It's similar to a period in musical phrasing. It feels stable and finished because you have gone back to the defining chord of your tonality. To not give the audience that perfect cadence after the half cadence is a tool to leave them feeling like a question was asked, and the expected answer wasn't given. It is very often used to make a piece feel interrupted and leaving your listener uneased, like something's missing : a perfect fit for scenes that are interrupted by a third party, like the "on the bus" and the "letter to willy" scenes.

But as you mention, it also works very well in the "eight fifteen" case, where the composer doesn't give the resolution, not because they were interrupted, but because Will didn't say the right thing to resolve the scene correctly. An answer was given, but it's not the one that would have led to the climax and a satisfying ending for the song : very fitting for Mike's attempt at communication being misunderstood.

sus music editing in s4 byler scenes (a saga)

since tiktok might die in the US soon, i wanted to convert some of my old tiktoks into tumblr posts so they can live on forever! i've been wanting to do this for a while but never got around to it. i'm starting with this one because ive been posting about music coding a lot lately. i recommend watching the video attachment (at the end of the post) after reading the whole post, just so you'll have context when watching.

ALRIGHT!

will and mike are interrupted in the majority of their solo scenes. the scene in jonathan's room, the scene in will's room, the scene on the car, & the scene in the cabin. i noticed a long time ago that the songs used in the first 3 scenes listed build up for the first half and then kind of explode for the second half. there's a point where the song changes/released after the buildup.

the songs are:

eight fifteen (jonathan's room)

on the bus (will's room)

letter to willy (talk on the car)

BUT, in will's room & the car scene, mike and will are interrupted almost right before the song is supposed to climax. i lined the songs up and listened and i'm right. interestingly, in the scene in will's room, on the bus is edited. in the scene, the song starts like normal at the start of the song. but they cut the middle out so it would skip right to the part RIGHT before the climax of on the bus. THEY DID THAT. so at the very end of the scene just before they get interrupted, the song is teetering on the edge of the big explosive part of the song, but it doesn't happen because they're interrupted and the song ends. in the car scene letter to willy is also edited. maybe im wrong, but there's a note i hear in the car scene that i cannot find anywhere in the song. so it seems like they're purposefully using songs that are building to something but cut off right before the pay off of the buildup. i wouldn't be capitalizing on this so much if 90% of the scenes this happens in werent mike and will staring into each other's souls and then having their gazes torn from each other, but they are. so take that as you will.

now we need to talk about eight fifteen. this is fucking wild.

eight fifteen is all build up for the first half. then there's a moment where it teeters on the edge for a second, and then BOOM! release & loud pretty synths. i lined it up, and the 'teetering' part of the song is in the scene in jonathan's room, but like the others, it's edited. but this one is WAY more crazy.

the song starts from the beginning when will sits on the bed next to mike. it builds while mike talks about his problems with el and not saying the thing she wants. then will says "look, mike, you're gonna see her again, and whatever it is you didn't say, you can say it to her then, okay?" the teetering part starts when will says

"look" and goes all the way until he says "then"

when he says "then", that is the moment when the buildup is supposed to release. but in this scene, it doesn't happen. instead, when he finishes talking, specifically when he says "then" the note kind of trails off. it sounds weird. it's unsatisfying. there was no payoff to all that buildup. i've seen plenty of other tv shows where this is used to emphasize the face that there was no payoff. something in the scene was anticlimactic. something that they wanted to happen or were expecting to happen didnt. the characters are disappointed or left hanging.

and when that note trials off, mike says

"yeah...yeah" and looks down, looking upset and conflicted and disappointed

he wanted will to say something else. will saying "you can say it to her then, okay?" disappointed mike. that's not what he wanted to hear. i think mike wanted will to reassure him and tell him he doesn't have to say something he doesn't mean or doesn't want to say, and that when they see el again mike can explain himself. mike desperately wants to be told he doesn't have to pretend to be in love with el if that's not how he really feels. he wants to be told that el won't be angry if he's honest with her about his true feelings for her, which are platonic. (hence why he later nods after will says 'what if they don't like the truth?')

but will doesn't understand that. will thinks they are in love, he thinks they're perfect. so in his mind, it's fine because mike can just say it when he sees el again. but he thinks that because he thinks mike actually means it, when in reality he doesn't. and by doing that, will only further pushed mike into giving his false confession. now mike thinks even more that he just has to spit it out and tell el what she wants to hear even if it's not how he really feels. this just breaks my heart because mike is so hated on but he's a GOOD BOY💔💔 he's just a 14 year old kid who's afraid of failing the people he cares about but also hates lying about his feelings and just wants to feel free from the expectations others have for him. he just wants someone, specifically will, to tell him it's okay, and that he doesn't owe anyone anything, especially not his own feelings. and it hurts extra bad because if will knew the truth about mike not loving el he would shower him in support because of course mike shouldn't have to lie just because it's what el wants to hear.

and just in case anyone tries to say otherwise, YES mike lied in the monologue. it doesn't need to be proven, it's simply canon.

like there's no denying this. believing it's just a mistake by the writers before believing mike lied is CRAZY heteronormative copium. like come on💀

anyways, the things mike says and does in the scene in jonathan's support this theory. he threw away el's note. "a fight you cant come back from" "maybe if i just said that thing then things would be different" his phrasing sticks out so much. "said that thing" and not "told her" or "told her how i feel". to mike it's just saying words he doesn't want to say. and "a fight you cant come back from" its almost like he's hinting to will that he and el need to break up and he's hoping will will catch on and support him. he trusts will and values his opinion and wants his support. usually he and will very easily communicate non verbally and are naturally in tune with what the other is thinking and feeling, but this time will doesn't catch on (because of his own heteronormativity and assumption that mike and el are in love), and mike is disappointed. he brings this up over and over, like he isn't satisfied with will's answer, and is a little more honest every time. the only thing that seemingly satisfied mike was hearing will's feelings. why did it even get that far?? why would what will said in jonathan's room not suffice if he is actually in love with el??? it just doesn't make sense.

(unless it actually makes perfect sense)

i'm very confident in this since this lies less with the continuity within stranger things itself and more with basic film/video/sound editing. i even got some comments from editors/musicians who agreed with me!

"It's a tactic I've actually used before in editing. It keeps the audience engrossed, and really makes it FEEL interrupted for the audience."

"Woah that's crazy! And it literally stops on the fifth so it's totally legitimately unstable/ unresolved."

stopping on the fifth refers to a technique used in music composition to make a chord progression sound completed. i actually know a bit about this because i took music theory in college, but if anyone knows more than me feel free to share! a completed progression is like a circle. you must begin and end with the same chord. you start with one chord and move down a fifth to the next chord, and do that until you end up back at the original chord. that way it sounds nice and satisfying and completed. in 'on the bus', which the commenter was referring to, this process is cut short, which would serve no purpose other than making the music sound and feel incomplete or interrupted or unsatisfying.

if i just butchered that whole explanation please let me know, but im pretty sure that's accurate.

here is the video with two of the scenes i talked about, using 'Eight Fifteen' and 'On The Bus'

and just as a reminder, on the bus has only played twice in the entire show. first in the lumax talk on top of the bus in season 2, and second in the byler talk in will's room in s4. 🙂

anyways i hope this was comprehensible😅 i remember my tiktok followers being very confused so feel free to re read and re watch as many times as necessary or reply with any questions! and anyone who has more input on editing/music pls share with the class if you'd like!!

anyways byler endgame, thanks for reading

[mind-travel-er]

The ring on Eddie’s right hand is often recognized as a “mood ring”. BUT there's a debate that it might be a specific stone. An obsidian snowflake. In close ups, you can actually see the ring better, with black and speckles of white.

A mood ring would be pretty cool. I'm all for it. But guess what?

Upon further research, an obsidian snowflake just so happens to be of importance in DnD. Here’s the description: “When exposed to dragon's breath, the stone absorbed an unpredictable portion of the damage and disintegrated. It is formed when the scorching-hot lava inside a volcano spurts out and cools down. Its birth signifies that in every chaos, peace is inevitable.” Coincidence? Or is it exactly describing Eddie's character arc? In the most chaotic of all places, the Upside Down, Eddie finally found peace when he "didn't run away this time, right?". Joseph Quin described Eddie as guilt ridden over what happened to Chrissy. Eddie could have found some serenity after all, by avenging her in his own way, and buying time for his friends to fight Vecna. It also builds Eddie's character in such an awesome way. He probably stumbled upon that ring in a shop and recognized the obsidian. Just the kind that would protect him from a dragon's breath. A strong metaphor for people waisting their breath on him, calling him a freak and other colorfull nicknames. Eddie is the kind of guy that pays 👏🏻 attention 👏🏻 to the smallest things, wearing daily a DnD reference that most people won't notice. That melts my heart, because it shows our boy is detail oriented.

AND, in lithotherapy, the obsidian snowflake is the stone of rebirth and emotional growth; also why called “the flowering obsidian”.

[byers-bowlcut]

I've seen people say El likes the IDEA of having a boyfriend more than she actually likes her own boyfriend, and jfc it's so true 😭 Like it's all over the show:

Season 1

She's initially attached to Mike because he's the first person to give her shelter, food, genuine human care and just,, not calling CPS immediately. Her feelings for him was born from trauma and dependency in season 1. And throughout the rest of the 3 seasons, we don't see it grow past that.

Also I think it's noticeable in S1 that:

She was uninterested when Mike tried to share his hobbies with her

She also did not seem to mind AT ALL when she questioned if Mike could be her brother. He voice is neutral and curious here, not the least bit repulsed by the thought of being siblings with Mike, like girl does not care 😭

Season 2

This season has zero onscreen moments of Mike and El actually getting to know each other further. They were separated nearly the whole season.

What we DO see:

El's attachment and dependency on Mike that was developed from S1

We also find out how El spent a year of her life watching melodramatic romance films. Many other middle schoolers might identify that relationships in real life don't work like those films. But El is fresh out of lab life, she's literally learning the world through this TV, and has now become obsessed with the IDEA of having a boyfriend/relationship just like that.

Season 3

Again, no onscreen moments of El showing interest in who Mike is as a person.

The very first scene we see of them, she's trying to get him to stop singing along to the song they're listening to. She seems to like kissing Mike. But isn't shown enjoying anything actually characteristic about him, like sharing interests with him such as music.

Hopper indicates that they don't do anything meaningful together either. We see here that before hanging out with Max, El had little sense of her own style, her hobbies, her interests- meaning spending time with Mike for months probably didn't involve many talking points did it?

Also in season 3, El dumps Mike with ZERO hesitation. Then she has the time of her life with Max. The most acknowledgment we get that she's oh so heartbroken is a small frown to Max that her and Mike aren't on best terms. And even that doesn't seem so paramount cause 1 episode later she totally dismisses Mike after he explains how Hopper threatened him. She just tells him maybe Hopper was right 😭😭

It's literally ONLY once she starts becoming in danger that she starts clinging onto him again. I feel like we've seen this film before hm.

Like where are any signs that she likes Mike as an individual, and is falling for who he really is, rather than simply being attached due to trauma, and liking the concept of doing romantic things (ie: kissing, dancing at the ball, etc.)

Season 4

This is the season it becomes the MOST OBVIOUS: El loves the concept of a happy relationship and being loved, but not really loving Mike for who he is. And bringing in Will's feelings just emphasizes this point.

To start, El continues doing all these relationship-y things that she did in the start of S3. She has Mike's name and pictures plastered all over her room. She makes a "Mike box" with his pictures decorated all over it. But the thing is: this is all sort of a façade at this point. We know she's BEEN unhappy with him for months ("From Mike! From Mike! From Mike!"). But with all these items, she's basically trying to convince herself that she's in this happy, fantasy, movie-like relationship, like she probably watched in hopper's cabin in season 2.

And then, there's the sheer difference between her and WILL in their feelings for Mike. We see it right off the bat when Mike comes to the airport: Will and El both have plans to give Mike something.

Will plans to give him a painting he worked extremely hard on. The painting is a connection of what they BOTH love: DnD, and it includes their friends who also play the game. It's very personal and immediately touches Mike. What's more is, the painting illustrates the exact qualities about Mike that Will loves: his leadership, his bravery, his guidance. This painting literally spells out to us that Will truly loves Mike for WHO HE IS.

Meanwhile, El plans on giving Mike a fun reunion date. She has the whole day planned out. And immediately: we see that what she wants to do doesn't actually takes Mike's interests and personality into consideration. You can see and hear the strain in his voice when he talks about "burritos for breakfast" 😬

You can see how he's not that relaxed at rinkomania, and nervous about skating, saying he's clumsy. He probably would've much preferred movies and playing a board game, over skating. But El has her own ideas. When she brings Mike to rinkomania, she tries to act really cool about it. She wants to impress him, wants to seem like she fits in and belongs.

Her present was never actually ABOUT Mike, and about loving Mike that she would plan this huge date for him. Her present was about her desperately wanting to have this cool date like every other normal teen girl might, with a normal boyfriend, and make it seem like they have a happy perfect relationship.

And then finally we reach their S4 fight. I find it extremely interesting how Hopper's cabin is framed in the background during their whole fight. It's almost like an indication that her desperate need to be loved by Mike stems from her trying to cope with losing Hopper and the hole left by him, that clearly did not exist when she happily dumped Mike in S3.

In their fight, when the topic of bullying comes up, Mike says he understands her, but El is quick to say he doesn't. She thinks Mike doesn't understand her, but this is just as much her not understanding HIM as well.

She doesn't get the extent of Mike's insecurities (definitely partially a result of bullying), something that Mike later divulges to WILL and not her. If the writers wanted to show us how much El understands Mike and loves him for who he is, her and Mike would work through his insecurities in their rs together, NOT through a middle man.

Overall it's pretty striking that we've never once heard El actually compliment Mike, or articulate, or even show what exactly she loves about him through four whole seasons. I mean...

Attachment to him due to trauma or grief =/= loving him for who he is.

Wanting to BE loved =/= loving him for who he is.

So really in terms of a relationship, what El ACTUALLY wants is the concept/idea of a regular boyfriend, and a happy easy relationship, all in an attempt to feel normal. And that's why we see them fall apart the way they do in season 4, and why Will is currently so involved. Because Will DOES see and love Mike for exactly who he is.

[queen-of-hawkins-why-ler]

The genius of Byler in s1 (the significance of Mike and Will spending all season separated)

Y'all, I started a ST rewatch from season 1, and I just wanted to make a post about how genius the setup of Byler and Mike and El's relationship is from the very beginning of the show. Actually, I believe that Byler has only been able to progress as a slowburn love story and eventual plot twist because of how strategically it was initially set up.

Mike and Will are introduced as having a "different" sort of relationship with each other, as opposed to the standard friendships they share with Dustin and Lucas. Right off the bat, we see that Will values being honest and vulnerable with Mike more than he values things that would otherwise benefit him. Around Lucas and Dustin, he acts as though he is fine with winning the DND game as long as Mike doesn't see the roll, but as soon as they leave, he admits to Mike that he lost and that the demagorgon got him.

We can also see that Mike has a different sort of relationship with Will than he has with the other boys. What is important to note, though, is that in s1 we only see the special care and affection Mike has towards Will in the context of Will not being physically present, as he has been taken by the demagorgon. Mike acts a good deal more concerned about Will and more eager to find Will than Lucas and Dustin do. He is the character of focus or the "protagonist" in s1, so we see him talking about Will to his family, and we see how upset he gets when he sees Will's "corpse" at the lake. El, Lucas, and Dustin all stay at the quarry, and Mike has an emotional meltdown and bikes home crying and hugs his mom. In this way, the show is suggesting from s1 that Will is special to Mike in a way that is different from how Mike views/treats Lucas and Dustin. But the thing is, we assume that Mike's perspective is only highlighted BECAUSE he's the protagonist/character of focus and not because his relationship with Will is unique and something we should be paying attention to.

I fully believe that if Mike and Will had been together in s1 the way they are in s2 and if we'd seen the way Mike acts around Will in s2 from the very beginning, then Byler would have been a lot more obvious, and I think we would've been able to recognize from the very beginning that Mike and Will are gay and that their relationship is building up to a romance. But because we only see Mike's care and affection for Will in light of Will's absence in s1, we can't connect those dots and recognize the love they have for each other. Also, we are introduced to El right after Will gets taken, and Mike spends all season with El, developing a relationship with her: a relationship that for all intents and purposes holds the appearance of a romance, even leading to a kiss. It's no wonder why the audience ships M*leven in the beginning instead of Byler, because all we have to go off of is Mike and El's close relationship and the high amount of screentime they spend together vs Mike and Will's one shared scene. We don't see Mike's sweetness and protectiveness over Will until season 2, but by that time, we have already had the expectation set for us that Mike and El are in love, so we never stop to consider that maybe the show is actually building up Byler. S2 is a direct reversal of Mike's relationships with El and Will in s1, with him looking for and missing El the way did with Will in s1, and sharing a lot of screentime/sweet moments with Will the way he did with El in s1. But because s1 already set the precedent that M*leven is romantic and Byler is platonic, we have no reason to assume that the roles are actually opposite from what we were initially shown.

The only reason Byler works the way it does is because 1. we are tricked into thinking that we are only shown how much Mike cares about Will because he is the protagonist and not because his relationship with Will is special, and 2. s1 builds up Mike and El's relationship while never properly showing us Mike and Will's relationship, only introducing the true prospect of Byler once we have already grown attached to Mike and El's relationship and the idea of Mike and El being in love. In s3, Mike and El date and make out all the while Mike and Will's relationship is rocky, so we have reason to believe that Mike is in love with/cares about El primarily and struggles in his friendship with Will because he is too focused on El. Even leading into s4, we assume that Mike and Will's friendship is still rocky bc Mike has been neglecting Will in favor of El and not because he's coming to terms with his feelings for Will and dealing with internalized homophobia. Yet, once Byler becomes canon and people go back and watch the show in light of it being canon, they will see that Will has always been special to Mike and that their relationship has always been highlighted as being noteworthy and different. We simply weren't able to recognize it from s1 because we never saw Mike and Will together: only how much Mike cared about Will while he was gone. And by the time their relationship turned blatantly romantic and special in s2, we still couldn't recognize it because of the expectation of M*leven. The writing for Byler is just so genius and well thought out even from the start.

[stranger-feathers]

Will being honest with Mike is a fundamental character trait, and the implicit trust between them is as well. That's why it's one of the few things the writers decided to establish about Will in the first episode ("it was a seven"), because it's meant to colour our whole perception of their dynamic. Will is good at hiding and doesn't mind lying, but he doesn't like doing it to Mike, even for his own benefit.

It's such a choice to then have Will lying to Mike and hiding behind El be his lowest point. And to then use that as fuel for Mike's confession, on the first time El loses ? To have that be the wrong choice, to have that not work despite Will ripping his own heart out for it ?

It's heartbreaking, but it works so well with the overall themes of the show : you have to be true to yourself and you have to be honest, because you can't and shouldn't hide forever. Will was a huge representation of these in S3, but he has lost both during S4. It's a truly tragic evolution, which hits just right for me.

I know we've all analyzed and waxed tragic-gay about the Byler Rain FightTM to death, but I've never heard anyone acknowledge how devastating it is that Will is still honest to Mike even after his (internalized) homophobic "it's not my fault you don't like girls!" comment.

Like I saw this post about how Will's honesty sets him apart from the other kids in Season 3, but it still absolutely floors me how, in the face of Mike's anger and hurtful words, Will doesn't deny being gay, even though it would be completely understandable for him to automatically protest or get defensive (like a certain cringefail boykisser we know...). Because even then, while experiencing the shock and complete betrayal of Mike's words, Will couldn't lie to Mike. Like that's so sad, actually just end me rn ;-;

Instead, it's his pure, overwhelming love for Mike and his desire to see Mike happy that ultimately pushes him to lie to Mike for the first time, not his betrayal.

This is why I don't buy that Mike knew he was lying during the van confession scene. Mike has always trusted Will implicitly, even more so in that moment because his assumption that Will had been concealing things from him since moving to California (and if he's hiding things from him then who knows what else he's been doing, surely he must be lying to Mike now too!) was dispelled by the painting reveal. If anything, this act of love only affirms that trust even more.

I'm so ready for the "What painting?" moment in S5. I need it magically teleported to my screen right now please!

[sade-alicious]

lighting in stranger things is so intentional and always has been. because in this scene hopper is clearly positioned in the ray of light

so all the other scenes where will is literally bathed in light as mike’s looking at him, or the blue and yellow lighting at rink-o-mania, its all on purpose

[steddielations]

gotta talk about how Eddie didn’t understand the hive mind until Steve explained it for him, and he didn’t question Steve or doubt him at all, he just trusted Steve’s word. that must’ve been validating for Steve, who’s usually the one getting things explained to him or having to argue his point so people listen

something about, Steve knows what it’s like to be out of the loop and he kept trying to make sure Eddie was keeping up, to the point of over-explaining and Eddie’s like “yes you mentioned the superpower girl thank you now please tell me our son isn’t cursed”

and yeah maybe Eddie should’ve known what a hive mind is since he’s super into fantasy sci-fi, but he was under a ton of stress and instead of Steve being like “you of all people should know” he just broke it down for him and i love that actually

so when Steve doesn’t get the Ozzy reference later, maybe Eddie was just giving Steve the same understanding that Steve gave to him, explaining it and not making him feel dumb for not knowing

[lesbyers]

dog metaphors are all about devotion, devotion to a person, a concept, a place etc, to be a dog is to be devoted.

there are three types of dogs

dog 1: pet dogs; loyal and devout, they follow after the object of their devotion desperately even when it is not reciprocated or out of their reach. they are usually (but not always), somewhat innocent (think puppy love). they are below or believe themselves to be below the devoted in terms of power/worth/status etc, at the end of the day they are just someone's dog. they feel they are owned by who or what they are devoted to, whether enforced by them or by their "owner" differs. some are naturally selfless and obsessive, others bullied into submission, some are mix of both.

dog 2: guard dogs; aggressive and loyal, protector and/or provider in some way, (think knight and king dynamic) use anger and violence as an expression of love and devotion, either prone to harming who/what they are devoted to or are dedicated to the protection of it in all forms. this varies depending on the morality of the characters. low morality guard dogs are possessive and challenge their devotion using violence and threat to gain control. others are valiant and heroic, usually with a strong moral code that will not be broken. they are often bad at communication and addressing their own emotions, choosing to speak through their actions rather than using words.

dog 3: wild or wolf-like dogs, at their core they are a large animals that are unaware of their strength and size, their displays of love and affection, although genuine and passionate, can end up harming or negatively impacting the objects of their devotion, (think dogs showing affection through biting not realising the sharpness of their teeth), usually impulsive, controlled by emotions and erratic, they are volatile and often illogical. to love and be loved by them is dangerous. violence is a natural or taught characteristic of theirs that is inherent and inescapable. these characters often don’t intend to cause harm and when they do it’s usually from an un-calculated place of impulsive destruction or an emotional outburst.

[stranger-feathers]

This is a man who (probably without fully realising) limits his own choices because he's determined to expand his little brother's.

I really like this part because it also reminds me of another reason why some people fail to get Jonathan, in addition to the difficulty of empathising with a character who's very different from them.

There's a very specific episode in the show that exemplifies this character trait, but a lot of people miss the implication of the scenes because they're not back to back. In episode 1 of season 2, Joyce says that Jonathan is supposed to choose what they watch for movie night. However, when we do actually see Jonathan before movie night, he's not choosing the movie he wants : he's letting Will choose one instead. It's such a precious piece of characterisation for the entire family, and opens up a lot of discussion about the chicken and egg situation of how Jonathan and Joyce ended up co-parenting Will : how much of it is due to Joyce genuinely needing his help; and how much of it is due to Jonathan's own initiative, even when it's unnecessary ? It's honestly one of my favourite characterisation choices in the show, even if it's a small detail in the grand scheme of things. (there's also something very interesting to be said about the fact that Will doesn't even end up choosing the movie, and how that relates to his own feelings towards being the "baby" of the family but that's another discussion)

Unfortunately, the main issue with getting this characterisation across comes from presentation : a lot of people simply don't remember the first scene when they get to the second, and just like that this subtle writing choice gets completely ignored by the general public. There's something very lowkey about how some characters are characterised, and that's one of my favourite part of the show, but it also makes me sad when it clearly prevents some people from understanding and empathising with them.

Jonathan is one of the characters that suffers from this the most in my opinion, which is a shame considering his character concept is already less palatable and relatable for most; especially compared to Steve who's both easier to conceptualise as a character and presented more straight forwardly to the audience.

It really fucking sucks as someone who likes both Steve AND Jonathan, but sometimes the fandom lowkey makes me hate Steve - whether it's by demonizing Jonathan/attributing his best tributes solely to Steve, or by wildly mischaracterizing him.

Yes!

Steve has his own, entirely valid, good qualities, many of which he actually shares with Jonathan: being brave, protective and loyal.

He's also practically intelligent and observant (realising the recording was coming from inside the mall), and he's done what a lot of young lads do. He was a bit of an arsehole in high school, and now he's grown up and grown out of that behaviour.

What that means is that he's a fairly ordinary kid. That's the whole point-he's the normal small-town boy who ends up doing battle with interdimensional monsters.

Jonathan, by contrast, gets so much hate because he's not ordinary. He is primed for the Upside Down. He's not ready for what happens to Will...but he's been expecting things to go wrong his whole life because they always have. When the GA calls him weird, or ugly, or boring, what they really mean is 'I can't relate to what he's been through so I don't have any sympathy for him'.

He's intelligent, sharp, witty, spiky, strong and compassionate. He has a moral centre because his father never did. He's a dad before he's a high-school grad; a mother's helper before he gets to be a child. This is the young man who organised his little brother's funeral, and still made sure his mother ate. This is the young man who had his spine cracked wide with a surgical stool, and tried to save his girlfriend through the pain.

This is a man who (probably without fully realising) limits his own choices because he's determined to expand his little brother's.

The constant erasure of Jonathan's complexities-his constant relegation to the background by large swathes of the fandom-hurts, because that's exactly what happens to kids like him. To kids like me.

Jonathan is different by design. The whole Byers family (sans Lonnie) is different by design. They are the ones best equipped to deal with all of this because they know the darkness that lies beneath normal life. It's not a shock or a surprise to them. The whole concept of the show is about a family that's been beaten down by people who don't care to understand, responding to the Upside Down in a way only they can.

Jonathan doesn't get to have the redemption arc Steve does, because (aside from the photo debacle) he doesn't need one. He doesn't need to grow up, because he's already had to. His outlook on life is more mature, more cynical, more responsible, because it's had to be. From the first episode, Joyce is already in the habit of focusing on Will because Jonathan 'can take care of himself', so his needs don't show on her radar. Not only does that mean she doesn't see them: it also means that Jonathan doesn't have a good handle on his own needs either.

When you learn to make yourself small to keep everyone else afloat, you lose the ability to tell when you're sinking.

And a big chunk of the GA seems to see this and go 'Oh, he's sinking, what a loser!' because it's become normal for him to sink. They see his character as the oddball tragic foil to Steve's everyman charm, when they were supposed to see it the other way around. Jonathan was supposed to be one of the central characters for once, and to take that away from him because he is the way he is...misses the point entirely. You're supposed to sympathise with Jonathan. You're supposed to watch the show and think deeply about the harm we do when we exclude people. You're supposed to learn from him.

Yes, Jonathan does struggle to be sociable, and charismatic, and open! He does struggle to express himself! That's the whole point: he is a child who's been through more in 16 years (as of S1) than most people in small-town America have in a lifetime. He is the way he is because he trudges through Hell and keeps going.

Because he'll be damned if anyone he loves ends up there with him.

[orie-jai]

Alright all. Someone posted something a while ago about putting more niche jobs in fanfics. I'm still working on it, but I wanna see if there's any interest. I've seen so many teacher Steve fics, but mostly for middle or high school. So, picture this:

Steddie modern au

Rockstar!Eddie who steps away from his rocker life

Pre-K Teacher!Steve

Eddie takes custody of his little half sister after her mom dies and enrolls her at the school Steve teaches at

Eddie's sister is a weird kid, but it's not a bad thing cuz weird kids make cool adults

[gamma-ghoul]

I have a question, and perhaps the Stranger Things fandom can help me with this.

But, I've been wondering about this for a while: why does Joyce seem to not care that much about money, unlike Jonathan? One of Jonathan's core traits is that he constantly worries about money, even when they move to California and the family is much better off, at least they are in my opinion. I understand that the first season was meant to show that Joyce is willing to do anything to find Will so money is not even within her scope. However, in season 3, she all but ditches her job to figure out what the hell is going on with the magnets. Meanwhile, Jonathan is getting into a fight with Nancy over an internship.

I like the dynamic personally, as it shows how Jonathan is more tied to his social class compared to Joyce. I mean Joyce has played a role in the parentification of Jonathan Byers.

While Joyce loves her children deeply, she does make some questionable choices when it comes to Jonathan. I mean Jonathan's plight highlights the traumatic impact that can be caused by poverty. And you can sort of infer that Joyce probably didn't experience that growing up.

But it is jarring as viewers to see Joyce give not a single fuck about their financial situation while Jonathan is worried about mortgages. It makes Joyce look way more irresponsible as a parent, or Jonathan is clinging onto an identity that is no longer accurate to their current circumstances.

[gayofthefae]

Okay but let's talk about this as a beautifully accurate representation of where El was in her healing here

She was abused by a man. In her healing, however, she found safe figures: a single father, a boyfriend, and two male best friends.

She is in a safer situation now. BUT

She has a VERY REALISTIC aversion to other women! She sees Max here from the moment she first saw her through the window only as competition for male attention. This is INCREDIBLY realistic and amazing to be shown so. Because trauma symptoms like this do not disappear immediately with safety - that's the definition of trauma 'symptoms', which only become disordered when not needed.

In her environment in the lab, especially with the now-knowledge of her siblings, she was not only appeasing the highest power which was a man, but she was in constant competition for that attention. We also know now: she was losing in that competition. But even when her only memories were of being an isolated "only child" abuse victim, the symptoms also make sense - the combination of conscious and subconscious memory creating the same trauma response.

The stakes of failing to gain approval from a man may no longer be public humiliation, verbal abuse, imprisonment, assault, electrocution, or abuse of loved ones (referring to 001's electrocution), but that doesn't mean the instinctive response isn't still very much there.

A man is someone to be appeased. A man is someone you seek approval from. A woman is someone you compete with for their approval. Only one can win. She doesn't have to actively believe Mike will hurt her to feel a general sense of high stakes and threat from Max being in his life.

It's why her relationship with Max the following season and prioritizing not just Max but a woman's approval over a man's and his desires from her is SUCH a big milestone. Because in season 2, she sees Max as a threat. A threat to her remaining prioritized goal, which we can interpret as being what she is so adamant about as her goal in the beginning of the season: male attention.

In season 1, she had Mike's attention and was rewarded with it. The only times she lacked it, he yelled at her or ignored her. Not in a way that genuinely resembled Brenner so much as triggered it - much like her triggers relating to him in season 4. So regardless of whether or how she factors that in, she either quantifies the idea of lacking his attention as connecting with some level of danger or neglect OR she does not factor those memories in making something differently scary: unknown stakes.

If a person is abused by someone who treats them nice when they do something wrong and poorly when they don't and form a new relationship with someone who is safe but they have never severely messed up with that person, they will hold that fear until they mess up and it's okay - likely repeatedly. As the abuse would have been long-term, they need to reassociate the consequences of mistakes. This is much of what we see in El's fears about Mike in season 4 and what I've talked about: because they are one of the only relationships of any kind that have not "broken promises" severely up until this point, she has no data on what will happen if she does. She doesn't believe he will harm her, but she does hold the very clearly stated belief that lack of attention means lack of love, and further that she is unlovable. This is the same reason it was so important for her and Hopper to break all their rules in season 2 - to demonstrate to her that making mistakes is a safe thing for her to do, the consequences of which may be anger but not danger or abandonment.

So with that fear for her in mind, as we know it in general and as it applies to Mike and continues to through and well past season 2, let's talk about her goal of Mike's attention in season 2:

In season 2 episode 2, we see her crying when Mike gets up and leaves the walkie. Of course, she misses him, but we did not see this response before. She is fearing that she is losing him. It's after this point that she becomes increasingly desperate to see him, fighting Hopper harder, yelling and throwing things, before ignoring his warning of danger to break out and see him. The reason the scene with Max is so emotional for her is not because she never thought he would move on, but because she was recently starting to fear that he would. She felt him slipping away and was feeling an increasing urgency to it, that if she didn't act now he would move on from her. She checked in with him every day and sites later that she was given comfort from his daily calls, but he starts to get more self-berating in them to himself for trying in the first place...until the breaking point. And she was right. After that, Mike stops calling, as we know from the number of days she recites later. So after she got that giving up on her call on Halloween night, the next morning she argued with Hopper for the first time in the "when is soon?!" argument where she psychically throws his plate into him. The subtext of "on day 700? On day 800?!" is "We're on day 354 now and I'm already losing him. I'll be too late in a few days, let alone years." So she sneaks out to see him in an attempt to save him before he finally slips away. And what she sees, to her, is that she's too late. Completely out of her control, and driving her anger towards Hopper further, she missed her window, and she lost him. She lost his attention - to another girl. In her mind, if she returns now, he'll never love her again. That's what happens when you lose someone's attention: you're unlovable. So she leaves for Chicago indefinitely, for a time even seriously considering not returning, even for Mike. The only reason she does is because she thinks she can give him something.

But when she sees Mike, he is thrilled to see her. And when she sees Max, all Max is to her is the girl who almost stole him. Who would have given a couple more days. Because she was raised on the idea that only one person can be loved at a time, the rest discarded, and that love is a competition that must be both won and maintained. Not only that, but that that competition is for a man's attention, therefore against other women.

Pre-season 1 El's life depends on whether she can achieve and maintain positive attention from a man. The stakes are high. In season 1, El is able to achieve positive attention from a man. The stakes are not high, but she has no way of knowing that. In fact, "a promise is something you can't break ever" likely interprets as reinforcing it to a traumatized mind. She also learns(this doesn't mean it's true) that the only way for her to maintain that attention is to be of service via her powers, as each time Mike is angry with her, she is able to regain it by making contact with Will or saving Mike using her powers. She has now learned that, based on the model she was raised on of love being something to be maintained, she is not lovable if she falls short of heroic. She ends season 1 with the ultimate heroic act: self-sacrifice.

In season 2, though she has Hopper, she is prioritizing her original validating male attention, Mike. Because Mike believes her dead, she feels powerless as she is unable to maintain the attention she cultivated from him. She cannot actively lose it either, so all she can hope to do is return to him before the slow fade goes all the way out. But she becomes increasingly desperate to catch him in time as urgency increased based on time-lapsed and his behaviors she's observed. His attention towards her is waning. She needs to get it back before it's lost. This is urgent to her and it is high stakes, because she's a thirteen year old in love? No. Because a man's attention was once life and death, and her body has not left that state, regardless of conscious beliefs about Mike. So she sneaks out despite the known danger - because in her traumatized body, the danger of losing a man's attention is equal if not surpassing to the risk of being seen. She thinks of losing Mike's attention if she doesn't go as an inevitability and being caught as a less likely risk, and if you think of the stakes of those situations as equal, the decision is clearer. So she goes, and she sees that she's too late. She has lost his attention. She is heartbroken and leaves. She fights with Hopper, she finds out about her mother and who she was or could have been and this is where that healing gets started. She prioritizes a woman - her mother. Then she prioritizes a woman - her sister. It is also incredibly important that Kali is the leader of the gang. Her approval is the most important, not Axl or anyone else's - who are first presented to her as the most intimidating, insulting and threatening her until Kali is a revealed as the true boss. She heavily considering not returning to the men who she considers to be lost to her: Hopper is angry with her, meaning she has lost his attention and approval, and Mike has moved on, meaning he would not care for her return. Hopper's apology is a huge part of it, because it is likely only the second she has ever received (Lucas) and the first elaboration of love. He teaches her for the first time in her life that anger is not a lack of love or punishment and that it can actually be based in love, though that does not make him less responsible, and most importantly, something she has never seen, he demonstrates capacity for guilt. He loves her enough to feel bad about hurting her. She's never had that before. Hurting has simply been an act to revoke love as purposeful punishment and the people who do it have stood by and repeated those actions. She then sees too that they are in need of her help. She now knows two things: Hopper does love her. Her powers make Mike love her. She returns - going to Will's house, not Mike's or home, with intention to save the day, not reunite. It seems from her surprised look that she didn't know Mike would be there, so we can also assume the case for Hopper, but likely only the Byers. She has returned to save the day, as is her value. After her reunions, she ignores Max. Because Max, to her, is solely a threat, as only one person can win Mike's attention and if Max is in her life, there's a risk that it isn't her, for which, as we've established, the stakes would be very high. Learning that Hopper's love for her is unconditional is not the same as learning that she is unconditionally lovable. To segue, though, Hopper apologizing in the car cements that fact for her in her relationship with Hopper: "I guess we broke our rule" - that making mistakes is okay and not a threat to her safety.

In season 3, however, she starts out being neutral about Max but not close. They seem to not interact much and just share a physical space together, as Max seems intimidated when El first approaches her one on one. The only reason for which is to regain a man's attention. El is happy at the start of the season because she sees Mike every day and is keeping his focus and has been consistently "every day for six months" as Hopper references. She feels that his attention is a secure thing. So when she loses it unexplained, she is very surprised and confused. The remaining stakes in this for her are very clear by the fact that she seeks advice from someone she dislikes after under one day of not having his attention. She goes to Max for advice on how to regain his attention. Max is also no longer a threat to her as she knows now Max is not pursuing Mike's attention. Max says she needs to relax for a day because giving him a taste of his own medicine will get him to understand and come back. And she suggests that if he doesn't act properly in response, she dump him. This IS huge for El when she follows through. It is an impulse she would have been very averse to before having the support of Max. She is starting to value women's attention more. But it is also true that it was merely an impulse. That night, she needs comfort when she's reminded that they're broken up (this is because she misses him, yes, but no action or emotion is untouched by trauma responses as an abuse survivor). Max tells her to not worry because he'll come crawling back any moment begging for her to come back. This is nice to her because it validates the healing idea she learned from Hopper last season: that she is missed and people who hurt her feel independent guilt. Though the breakup is big for her, we know it doesn't solve everything from her persistent symptoms in season 4. Because though progress, every step of the breakup so far is a tactic. It is an empty threat, just like Max makes to Lucas, to get Mike back. At this point, she has never truly believed that they will stay broken up. Which is also why a huge step in the season is her ANGER towards him when she sees that he is remorseless and expects HER to come back to HIM. She wants his attention, and it's better than nothing that he still wants hers, but she now has Hopper as a healthy comparison to raise her expectations. Her expectations have been raised to expect remorse for hurting her(huge!). So when he does come "crawling back" SHE DOESN'T LET HIM. Again, HUGE FOR HER! She even argues that maybe Hopper was right in suggesting they spend time apart. Of course, this too, is said in anger and not commitment, as many such things are in life. Because he did not apologize in earnest, he shifted blame to Hopper. He 'explained', but he did not apologize. We know it is said in anger not follow through because in the very next episode he offers an olive branch, subtly implying regret for his previous comment by making fun of himself for it, and she immediately looks at him with interest again, showing she never genuinely stopped wanting to be together. She is not ready to forego his approval, but is still major progress for her hold out on it until her standards are met and he has yet to fully apologize. She then overhears him say he loves her which steps EVERYTHING up and I would argue actually causes major regression for her. It is the classic moment of regression: there is something she has been slowly learning not to chase after...and she gets it. She got the thing she craved. But she still holds onto her growth in holding out for that apology that she gets in the mini-mart the following episode. She has communicated with him her needs - trust - and received an apology. In the apology, though, he attempted to tell her he loved her but they were interrupted - she knows this, she heard the attempt, but it seems that he intends to follow up himself at the next opportunity, then everything gets complicated, so she lets him initiate like he seems to want to on his own time.

(had to paragraph break bc tumblr gave me a warning)Then, she loses the only man in her life who she has confirmed unconditional love from. She no longer has that to return to. It's the last day and she's leaving without having Mike as her boyfriend again. Not previously mentioned, but that is also pertinent because in season 2, she was shown learning English from movies that idolize romantic love about all - even using the name Michael. She lacks her father's attention now and doesn't want to leave without Mike's to hold onto in her shift to complete unfamiliarity, so she gives him one last chance to do it himself, then decides to initiate on her own and tell him she loves him. She, naturally based on what she overheard, assumes that nerves are the only reason he hasn't said it/gotten back together, so this will solve them. To her, she has his attention again.

Pre-season 4, they have been writing consistent letters and are implied to talk on walkies when Mike has access to Dustin's radio, as El has a walkie in her room with her Mike-things. When it comes to letters, there is a maximum amount of attention you can get or give and she is getting it...almost. She's started to notice the pattern that, though she pointedly signs her letters "love" every time, he always signs "from". In retrospect, she realizes that the his last attempt to tell her he loves her was mere hours before it was first discovered that she lost her powers. She isn't the hero to him anymore, so, just she felt in season, she has stopped being lovable. Although in season 1, the tone was different. In season 1, it was "I can make myself lovable with my powers! I can get love I haven't had before!", but now it's "I have the ability to lose that love". Despite her personal efforts, losing her powers makes her incapable of maintaining his love, which she still believes she must do. She is also being bullied. Not only has she lost her powers, but she is failing socially. She still has Mike's attention, but like in season 2, though for different reasons, she fears that it is waning. She lies to him in the letters to maintain it and when he arrives, plans the entire day with the sole intention of winning him back/convincing him to love her, to the point of completely excluding Will from it: "I want today to just be about you and me". Because in this case, Will, too, is capable of stealing his attention from her, though she wouldn't blame him the way she did Max, she still protects herself from it. Because she believes that if he finds out, she will lose the last bit of his attention she had and he will discard her. Which is also why, even after being caught clear and red-handed, still she asks Angela to lie for her. Because this is still high stakes for her. We then see a direct confirmation when Mike is directly paralleled to Brenner in her flashback. But this is not the first time he is paralleled to Brenner. Mike has been a representation for the stakes with which she views male attention the entire series - which is why only Mike and Hopper are directly paralleled to Brenner, a Brenner parallel means high stakes attention - season 4 is just the first time we're seeing her when she's actually failed to attain it and can no longer assume she would have been fine. She had started to believe that she was lovable to him in season 3 as he expressed missing her when they broke up, but she now views her powers as the only thread causing that. He views her as "incredible", not lovable. Everything he 'loves' her for, she no longer is. And as Mike's cut line describes, she somewhat gives up here. But not in an independent way. In a resigned way. Not "I don't need your love", but "if you can't love me it's because no one can". So she leaves. She leaves to become lovable again.

And when she sees the first man to ever teach her she was worthless, she runs at first - of course, he represents danger on a base level. But then he tells her he is confident he can, to her mental translation, make her lovable again, and she goes with him willingly. Because at the end of the day, too, every moment spent trying to convince any man to love her was just an attempt to relive and rewrite her relationship with Brenner to convince him to. That opportunity is in front of her again, and she can't pass it up.

Because none of this was about Mike. And none of it was about Hopper. And none of it was about Max. It was about Brenner and her siblings. She has spent the entire series fighting for male attention and seeing others as competition for it without knowing why. Season 4 is about her learning way. In season 4, she uncovers and processes the memories that founded her belief that love must be repeatedly earned and maintained and the consequences for it not being are abuse and death. Now that she can point to the exact memories that taught uniquely her that, it no longer looks like a fact of life. And she can let it go. She can let him go.

She has someone to blame now. "I came her to find out if I was the monster. But now I know. It is not me. It is you." She has someone to blame.

It isn't her fault for failing to earn his love. Because love is not be earned. "Papa does not tell the truth". That was a lie he told her to get away with it. She has someone to blame now. Which also means she has someone to let go.

She's free. She reunites with Mike and he is just Mike to her. He is no longer a mirage of her abuser abandoning her over and over again. Will is just Will. He is not someone she'll be locked in a cage for not being able to be.

So when she said she was worried Brenner was right about it being soon, it is guilt towards Max only. Hypotheticals she could have done differently. But she says that to Mike as just Mike. And she goes to her room and she sees her dad as just her dad. And her mom isn't competing for her dad and her best friend isn't competing for her boyfriend and neither is her brother. Because she doesn't need it anymore. That's what not needing it is.

Because she never need Mike to love her. She needed Papa to love her. She doesn't need that anymore, so Mike is what he always was. Not needed, but wanted. She never needed Mike. So not needing him now is good thing. It means he's just Mike to her <3.

[milliebugydementia]

i like to think that the parallel between mike destroying the pillow fort el slept in and will destroying castle byers is actually very meaningful -

i like to think that the choice of a pillow fort was deliberate for hiding el. it's a childish object in the same way castle byers is, and the destruction of it symbolises a loss of a kind of softness and innocence that will never come back.

when will destroys castle byers, it's after trying to make things go back to how they were before he went missing. it's the emotional culmination of all of his angst that the things that have happened to him have happened, and that he's stunted in place when everyone else is moving on and managing to be straight. especially because castle byers was something he & johnathan had built to cope with their father leaving.

when mike destroys the pillow fort it's because he's lost el, and with her any hope of finding will.

it's notable that in the scene, he first stares at the door as if waiting for el, or even for will, to come back. he cares for el at this point as her own person, but i think in this scene he is angry because he feels stupid for ever letting himself hope that he could find will again, and that things could go back to normal - just as will felt trying to get the party to play D&D with him.

for both of them it is a deep embarrassment holding frustration and grief of losing their childhoods, and of losing each other, as two people who were boys together.

the fact that mike has this development so much earlier than will in the show is testament to how the trauma changed the both of them - mike grew up too fast, and will didn't get to finish growing up.

i think mike's actions in the show all follow on from here. his grief of losing will - first when he went missing, then when he came back and was wounded - was so much that he shut it out in favour of being angsty about eleven. and then once she came back, he couldn't understand why everything still felt wrong, and instead he rejected childish notions and preferred to think of his woundedness as maturity, getting obsessed with eleven in order to avoid doing things that reminded him of how things used to feel when they were still kids. this is why he is so mocking and cold to will, because he hasn't really processed how much will going missing shook the security of his world at such a young age, and he never acknowledges that it did. he also hasn't been able to grow up, he's just trying to hide it from himself.