#straight-up hate this girl
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Once again, it got warm outside today (and thus hot inside) and once again, one of my roommates decided that that means that she needs to go plant her ass out on the porch from the moment that it starts cooling down (so... like, 7pm) until, like, midnight, smoking endless cigarettes. AKA meaning I can't have my fan on and cool this room off.
Like, one cigarette? Annoying but fine. But every fucking time I turn my window fan on- and it is now 10pm, and I'm getting tired- I get a face full of cigarette smoke either immediately or just a couple minutes later.
....really hoping that she moves out over the summer and gets replaced by someone with a) less of an addiction and b) more of a sense of. Like. 'Hey, I live in a community and my actions affect other people,maybe I should act like it?'
#personal#straight-up hate this girl#not sure if it's her or the other one who is currently hording all of the spoons all but two of the forks all but two of the plates#....all but one of the good bowls both of the small cooking knives and who TF knows what else in their room#buuuut the smoking is far more annoying#and I know this asshole is the one that sometimes smokes at just before 4 in the fucking morning#because I heard her talking with her drunk-ass friend (...at 4pm on a Thursday) about it and it's just like...#you could sleep in more if you didn't feel the need to turn into a fucking smokestack as soon as you get up#again: you live in a community and affect other people. ACT LIKE IT.
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Everyone “hates” Mike in the FNAF movie..
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#mike schmidt#fnaf vanessa#vanessa shelly#vanessa afton#jeremiah fnaf#fnaf max#Cindy fnaf#fnaf movie#fnaf fanart#five nights at freddy's#THIS is another unserious comic btw#BUT I JUST find it funny we’re told thru the whole FNAF movie that like#everyone hates Mike he has no friends most people are angry at him#then a good portion of the folks who actually meet Mike#just genuinely like him#or in some cases like Cindy the ice cream girl straight up have a crush on him#Mike has some unspoken rizz to him idk#everyone loves a sleepy guy 🩵#what makes it funnier is Mike doesn’t even pick up at all people like him#that one ‘meet the Robinson’s’ bit#love you Mike Schmidt you’re so funny 💜💜
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confession that could probably get me executed by the tma fandom:
as someone on the asexual spectrum (please keep this part in mind), i enjoy seeing all the different interpretations of jon's asexuality, instead of acting like he can only be asexual in one specific way like a lot of this fandom does.
[hiding behind a giant rock trembling in fear]
#literally as long as you aren't straight up erasing his asexuality you're chill#sorry i can't keep this in anymore i hate how 50% od the fandom acts about jon being canonically ace#is this too risky for main tags......#eh i'll add the bare minimum ones#tma#magpod#jon sims#magnusposting#silly girl yap sesh
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Rick Astley Is Haunting You
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Someone bets Tucker he can’t hack into a hero’s patrol playlist and sneak a Rick Roll in there. He does, easily, and finds that said hero has horrible music taste.
So he sets out to hijack every hero’s music playlist he can find and rate their music tastes on a chart, sometimes adding in his own music or joke songs he thinks they’d like. It only gets back to the heroes when Tucker posts a video with his rankings. Up until then, they thought it was another hero or new villain messing with them. Not a civilian??
(Nightwing’s playlist is sixth on the list, and he’s furious about it.)
#dpxdc#pondhead blurbs#tucker just putting new music on playlists and judging superheroes#they hate it#someone pissed Danny off and Tucker hacked into their shit and played the baby shark song for three hours#i queued this#y’all ever try to take a day off and your manager straight up tells you that you can’t#because everyone ELSE is taking that day off?#anyways in other news I broke a glass because I did not have the time to recover from last week 🥂#honestly if it was the main manager working today I would have insisted that I need today off but it wasn’t#and I’m not gonna do that to the manager who was on shift because that girl gets put through enough stress#so by the time you see this assume I’m already in a coffin
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internalized biphobia is crazy "Maybe I'm just faking it, I really do like guys what if I'm straight" I dated a woman for three years. that's not "faking it for attention" behavior
#as much as I hate it when people act like a bi person is either gay or straight depending on their partner#and sexuality is a switch going from gay to straight at any given moment#that is exactly how i think of my own sexuality#dating a woman?#what if I'm a lesbian I really do love this girl#oops we broke up now I have a crush on a guy what will i do if it was all a phase and I'm straight???#peekaboo thought process#no object permanence#internalized homophobia
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“Oh Domino and Adam hate each other but secretly love each other” no no, this isn’t Powers/Luvart levels of bizarre and incomprehensible homoeroticism/rivalry dynamic.
They’re just two edgy guys who like each other. The title of “love language” was not a joke.
#txt#if Adam sincerely hated domino he’d straight up leave him LOL#and Domino would probably like. kill Adam if he found him too annoying#monsters and girls
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Moiraine Reflecting
Season 2, Episode 4
#moiraine damodred#moiraine sedai#rosamund pike#wheel of time#wheel of time spoilers#wot spoilers#wot show spoilers#wot gifset#moiraine gifset#my gifset#MY GIRL IS STRAIGHT UP HAVING A VERY UNGOOD TIME#the way she Puts On her court face in the second one?#then the immediate disgust#as she turns away#from this thing that she's been forced to become#this thing that she thought she'd escaped#in this city where there is nothing but lies and manipulation and pressure#and she HATES it#gifset#the director said 'have a good session ros!'#and ros heard 'more micro expressions ros!'#and now: HERE WE ARE!!!
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It’s never overstated to me when people are like “work out bc it makes you feel better” bc it literally does. I think what I used to get hung up on is making the perfect schedule / wanting to know what I was doing right away. But it’s also okay to flounder at first and experiment w things and figure out what works for you and your body. The important thing is you’re starting out bc your body really will thank you for it later down the line. You cannot keep pushing it off it will add up
#“Work out not bc you hate your body but bc u love it” is the truest statement ever#I also don’t think a gym membership is needed bc I know straight up athletes who only ever do bodyweight workouts#It helps me so that’s why I have one but it’s by no means necessary#I still do at home workouts at times bc I think they’re rly fun and a nice switch up#And just playing around and finding out what works for me but what also challenges me#I don’t think I perfected it yet but I’m doing lots of research & experimenting w things & I also just love the endorphins it gives me#My friend and I are ab to start regularly biking through nature trails & I think that will be so therapeutic for me bc I usually just#Work out at the gym/at home. It’ll be a nice little addition#And buying cute workout two pieces actually motivates me to work out too they make me feel like a Pinterest girl fr
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The way this fandom treats Pudding should be studied under a fucking microscope because what do you mean you hate a girl who has been manipulated by her mother since she was born into hating herself and using a fake personality to attract men??? What do you mean you hate a girl whose last scene was sobbing because she had to let go of the only guy she has ever truly loved and has ever understood her??? Actually. Let me just-- What do you mean you hate a girl who was manipulated during the whole arc and clearly is being psychologically abused by her mother??
#every day i think the one piece fandom would hate me if i were a character of the show bc i would. probably be pudding ngl#pudding is the best representation of people with mommy issues my girl did nothing wrong hate big mom instead or something#she is my beloved#also it's incredible like. the amount of hate zeff gets but then big mom is like. never mentioned when it comes to pudding????#pudding is literally traumatized HOW CAN YOU NOT SEE IT#a girl who starts crying in the middle of a wedding bc a guy didn't straight up insult her for being different is not okay mentally#one piece#charlotte pudding#whole cake island
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throwback tuesday to that time when i took one of the few large lecture hall classes i ever took in college, a class on pre-1500s English literature, and the professor (a balding man with a British accent who banned computers because, according to him, he once caught someone watching Shrek 2 on a laptop during the lecture and he was upset it wasn't Shrek 1) stopped in the middle of talking about Beowulf to a hundred students to ask ME SPECIFICALLY (in the back half of the room but not all the way at the back) if I was using my smartphone under the table, so I had to lift up my hands and show him that no, I was knitting because the class had a bunch of printouts so I didn't need to take notes but the man wouldn't let me play spider solitaire or scroll tumblr and I had to do SOMETHING with my hands, and he was like, "ah, weaving peace I see. it seems we have the peaceweaver in our class" and then just carried on with things
#pickle pontificates#i'm not even mad. he was just eccentric enough to get away with it#always annoys me a bit though when college professors are like that#like girl you realize that a significant portion of students take notes electronically right. and if someone's watching shrek 2 then idk ma#it's their college experience. you're still getting paid#the lame beowulf joke did make beowulf stick in my head though#was it worth being perceived by 100 people at once for no reason? that's still up for debate#now the TA for that class. that guy actually sucked#a year later i was still running into people who just had the worst time with him. straight A eloquent friendly newspaper editor students#like the kind of students professors just love. engaged and respectful and earnest and talented. and they all hated that guy's guts#i had a gossip right in the english department about it. kinda scary. was afraid he'd come around the corner
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"mom, can we have persona 2 innocent sin?"
"no we have persona 2 innocent sin at home"
persona 2 innocent sin at home:
#did they even try to hide the fact they're just ripoff persona 2 characters#same hair colors. i bet you the blonde girl speaks english or some other language#soy (i think thats the blue guy's name) literally uses a machine gun#and wonder straight up just looks like tatsuya. not to mention i think he rides a skateboard?#i only watched the p5x intro idk#no hate to p5x bc i havent even given it a chance yet but why did they make p5x literally just make p6....#persona#persona series#persona 5#p5#p5x#persona 5 the phantom x#persona 2#p2#p2is#persona 2 innocent sin
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"We want more morally grey/flawed female characters"
You bitches can't handle APPLE WHITE!
like people keep saying "you couldn't even handle rose quartz" but this is even more pathetic to me. How can y'all make this kid into a monster?
#ever after high#apple white#rose quarts steven universe#rose quartz#rose quarts su#steven universe#morally grey characters#Other female characters I think get too much hate are Kikikyo from Inuyasha and Mai from atla#Y'all can't handle characters that are flawed#You guys clamor for more diverse female characters yet freak out when your given these well written flawed girls that are diverse#Y'all don't want flawed- you want generically relatable- you don't want morally grey- you want morally dark white#Justice for my girl#royal or rebel#Stop villainizing apple white- shes selfish not a monster#And she's complex#I'll defend her forever#Ever after high really pointed at how both sides where selfish and that both made fair points#But y'all couldn't see that the royals had a point#And even when they were just straight up selfish it was understandable#Y'all really want to reduce the most compelling part of ever after high's story to nothing#morally gray#nuance#'oh but she's classist-'#She's also afraid of her and her friends fading out of existence and thinks raven is kind of selfish for even risking it#Not saying she was right but she has a point
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Honestly we could REALLY get into the fact that a lot of the insanity in Acotar is an excellent exercise in why you can't really separate the art from the author.
Sjm's zionism is OBVIOUS in the text. The ic destabilize governments to the detriment of people they will never have to care for, steal artifacts from other countries, displace people, cause invasions, commit war crimes for 50 years "for the greater good" all while their own people are living under unchecked brutality and poverty.
They are rich megalomaniacs that care for no one but themselves and their own emotional and material satisfaction and they are PRAISED for it. In fact anyone who even remotely disagrees with the IC is almost always one of the villains in the story (Beron, Tamlin, etc) as if to condition the reader that asking questions that are critical of the IC puts you on the wrong side of the narrative morally.
All of that sounds REALLL familiar huh?
#and the funny thing is sjm brought this on herself#unlike most authors she creates a clear framework in the text of what the narrative considers morally right and morally wrong#and her characters are always in the side that is morally right in the books but is morally abhorrent in real life#you have NO CHOICE but to question the actual author atp#like if the ic were real they would be the gop#and i think its funny that a lot of the havoc they wreak is most centered on people that are poc or marginalized in the book#but im supposed to get behind it because its some white teenager having a girl boss colonial moment#i hate these novels#if sjm wanted to do this she should have straight up just made feyre and co villains#anti sjm#anti acotar#anti rhysand#anti feysand#anti ic#anti acomaf#anti sarah j maas#anti inner circle#anti acowar
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The eternal opposing relationship between the two sides of a mirror
or: In defense of Shiori
I feel like Shiori is one of the most controversial characters in Utena. Some love her, others despise her. And I don't have a problem with people having strong opinions on her character. What bothers me is the tendency to exaggerate her most negative traits, focus on her most harmful actions, completely ignore any redeeming qualities she might have and then paint her as a one dimensional villainous caricature, a mean straight girl who plays with the lesbian's feelings for the sake of it, without anything deeper going on.
I'm aware of the fact that some people refer to her like that in endearment or in a satirical fashion, and I'm not saying that you can't consider her your favorite problematic evil girl representation. I'm only trying to make people realize that it's her complexity that actually makes her such a compelling character.
I've seen people call Shiori all sorts of names, some of which were baffling enough to make me wonder if they even remembered what happens in the show, and weren't just judging a version of the character that they made up in their head.
So, let's look at the things Shiori actually does, throughout the course of the story.
Disclaimer: I'm only going to take the series into the account here, because I think we can all agree that everyone's characterization and personality differs at least slightly in the movie. Background characters also get a lot less screen time to explain their motivations in order to fully focus on Anthy's journey and struggles, which is understandable.
1. She "steals" the boy from Juri.
This is her biggest crime, which seems to define her from the very beginning. Even though Juri didn't actually have any romantic feelings for him, this action is detrimental to their relationship - it breaks the trio apart, isolates Juri from the pair, is an act of betrayal against her and proves it was done with full awareness that it would hurt Juri emotionally.
Shiori is a deeply insecure person, who constantly feels inadequate and beneath other people. The only reason why Juri seemed to actually like her that Shiori could think of was pity, and even when she found out she was the object of her romantic affection all along, she still struggled to comprehend it. Her self loathing and constant perceived inferiority make her desperate to gain any sort of control over her life and relationships, but they're also the exact reason she feels that the only way she could ever do that is by hurting others. She's always one step below and incapable of crossing that distance, therefore the only way to become equal to people is to bring them down to her level, by humiliation.
When she "steals" the boy from Juri, she achieves that. For a moment, she feels good about herself and leaves Ohtori thinking that she has found the answer, the solution. But she's wrong. From that moment on, it becomes more and more apparent to her that what she did was never out of love for the boy, even though she doesn't let herself acknowledge it fully. Because the truth is, Shiori actually regrets hurting Juri, which she admits herself during her elevator confession.
When the guilt starts getting to her, her confidence high wears off, and she ends up feeling ever worse.
That's why she breaks up with him and comes back. She's not ready to leave yet, not ready to progress. There's still something binding her to Ohtori - Juri, and Shiori's unresolved feelings for her.
2. She tries to set things right with Juri and to fix their relationship.
Even though at this point Shiori still thinks that Juri only ever associated herself with her out of pity, she still makes several attempts to get closer to Juri, who understandably (albeit coldly) turns her down ever time. This is a very clear sign of conflicting feelings Shiori has for Juri - jealousy and admiration, resentment and longing, hate and love. After all, Shiori admits that the two practically grew up together. Their friendship may have always felt fake to Shiori, but she clearly cherished it deeply.
3. The Black Rose Arc.
First of all, we should establish what is the purpose of this arc and how it functions. It explores the motivations of background characters and shows their worst side to the audience. The characters that end up in the elevator are the most unstable, vulnerable ones, with the least power in the system, in unequal and/or exploitive relationships with the duelists and their agency under threat. Mikage offers them a way to gain that power by making them follow their most toxic, negative emotions. And despite all other characters doing exactly that, from what I've seen Shiori is the one that gets the most hate for it. I don't think she should be judged any harsher for what she did under the influence of the black rose than, let's say, Wakaba or Kozue. Especially because the reason all of them ended up in that elevator is because they recognized that these urges were harmful and were seeking help and counseling.
What this arc does do is reveal how Shiori's inferiority complex drives her to act against her own desires. Even though she longs for things to be different, even though she is not happy at all with how her relationship with Juri looks like, she is unable to fix it, because that would require her to consider her own affection for Juri. And she can't do that, because it would mean admitting that she's not stronger than Juri, that she hasn't beaten her, that she's doesn't have control and an advantage over her. Although she tries to keep up this smug, self-assured facade, the reality shines through.
They key to understanding Shiori is noticing that she specifically doesn't want to acknowledge that Juri's feelings are reciprocated, and the obsession is mutual. If you paint their relationship as one sided, you're actually falling for her act.
4. She enters a relationship with Ruka.
Ruka is a handsome (arguable), respected boy who appears out of nowhere and starts showing interest in Shiori. It's obvious that for an insecure girl, who in addition struggles with confusing repressed feelings, this would be something unthinkably wonderful. The affection and praise she gets from him is exactly what her low self-esteem craves. You might be wondering why she didn't perceive Juri's feelings for her in the same way. And a part of the answer might be that, post nameless-boy-incident, Juri was nothing but cold to her. She might have been pining after Shiori from afar, but in the end she's distant and untouchable, and they're divided by their messy past. Meanwhile Ruka is a clean slate, seems openly affectionate, engaged in their relationship and he pays attention to her. But I think the main thing that makes Ruka so different from Juri is the fact that...he's a boy. Because, as Revolutionary Girl Utena establishes, gender plays a crucial role in interpersonal dynamics. Attention from a boy is fundamentally coded as romantic, desirable, necessary and most importantly: increases the girl's worth in society's eyes. It makes one a princess. Meanwhile Juri's advances could only be seen as an invitation to friendship, at best. But Juri's status and beauty make her special, while Shiori is not. Therefore, it can only be pity and mockery.
Of course, Ruka only uses Shiori to influence Juri and dumps her as soon as he achieves his goals. It's true that Shiori could have listened to Juri's warnings, but then again... why should she? From her perspective, Juri's her ex-friend that doesn't want anything to do with her, who only suddenly comes to Shiori when she's finally happy and fulfilled, and encourages her to end it. She doesn't know the wider context of the situation, nor does she remember the Black Rose arc. Juri's warnings don't sound sincere to her.
And so, Ruka gets rid of her in the coldest, most indifferent way, not explaining anything or showing even the slightest sign of compassion. Before that though, he makes an interesting remark, about Shiori putting on an act and polishing somebody else's sword.
Honestly, I don't really know how to interpret it in any other way than Shiori actually having feelings for someone else, despite trying her hardest to conceal it. Are my shipping lenses not allowing me to see any different possibilities? Am I going crazy? I don't know.
Nevertheless, Shiori begs him to stay, devastated. Her life got turned around so suddenly, she found appreciation, status, comfort and stability, and now all that's been taken away from her as abruptly as it was given. It's a public humiliation.
I once heard someone say that this would be the perfect moment for Juri to step in and defend her. And to be honest, although it may be true, I'm not completely sure. It may have been the one display of open care that Shiori needed from her, but it might as well have been interpreted by Shiori as Juri affirming her superiority over her and feeling sorry for her again. We will never know. In my opinion, so much of their relationship is going on in their own heads that the only thing that could ever cause positive progress is communication (which neither of them seem to be a fan of).
Instead, Juri only tries to console her after the fact, when Shiori's at her absolute lowest. In the context of all the assumptions Shiori holds and Juri's previous indifference, it quite understandably comes off as a sneering attempt to gloat.
That's about it. You may have noticed that I've summarized all Shiori's appearances into 4 points, and only one of them includes an instance of Shiori hurting Juri voluntarily, out of her own free will, not influenced by anyone. I'm not saying that she was forced to taunt Juri during the Black Rose Arc, I'm not trying to diminish the suffering she's caused or trying to paint her as a perfectly good person. I am trying to make it clear that she is not some cunning plotter, dedicating every minute of her life to finding ways to make Juri suffer that some people seem to take her for. I am trying to humanize people's perception of her a little bit. Especially considering the fact that last scenes of her include those when she waits for Juri and follows her so that they can go home together, and then joins the fencing club. If this doesn't show that she's capable of change, I don't know what does.
She's not an innocent princess, that's true, but she's not just an egoistical, manipulative liar either. She's a bit of both. After all, if Revolutionary Girl Utena is supposed to teach you anything, then I think it's that we're all just people, and the complexities of human experience make it impossible to fit anyone into a box, assigning them definite labels like "princess" or "witch".
And if you look at a teenage girl who, like all people in Ohtori, struggle under the system of patriarchy and heterosexuality, and all you see is a wicked, sinister witch, then you may have just fallen into the trap that the narrative had set for you.
#Shiori: I may be pathetic but you're the one who fell for me lol#no fr you don't need to make up reasons to hate shiori there's plenty enough right there in the text#rgu#revolutionary girl utena#shiori takatsuki#juriori#I guess#she's so fucked up I love her#like girl feeling delighted after finding out your bestie has a crush on you is not very straight no matter how you justify it#moje
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Mon and Padmé are the same age, okay? And then there's Bail, who is like. Twenty or something years older than them.
Anyway I just like to imagine Bail, who has been married for years by the time he meets either of them, and has an absolute dream of a marriage, listening to both Mon and Padmé talk about their husbands like
#He is concerned okay#every time he thinks Anakin is kinda okay Padmé opens her mouth#and Bail goes uh oh not a single day since Skywalker bullshit#he just straight up hates Perrin#he is NOT good enough for Bail's bestie girl okay#sw#tcw#Bail Organa#Padmé Amidala#Mon Mothma
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Alrighty fellas time for another one
(DPxDC) Batman Rogues ranked based on how good at parenting Danny (and co.) they would be
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Would probably actually be able to step up and be (relatively) good parents: The Penguin, Mr. Freeze.
They would have EXTREMELY different dynamics with Danny, but I think they could figure it out.
The Penguin would definitely only take in Danny to improve his reputation, and probably so that he could monopolize the use of a new meta’s abilities. (And perhaps to study him)
However, I think that attitude would last for at the absolute most a month, probably closer to two weeks, before he genuinely bonded with him. He’s like the dad who says he doesn’t want a pet, and then in a week they’re inseparable.
He’s not a good person, but I think he could probably end up being an awesome fucking dad. Also, there’s no way in hell anyone would mess with Danny. Not even close. If he found out Danny was getting bullied he’d ruin the bully’s fucking life.
He wouldn’t directly throw hands with a child, sure, but that’s only because it would look bad. He would, however, completely destroy their family’s careers and force them to leave Gotham out of shame.
Mr. Freeze is only a rogue because of his wife. Like, that’s it. He only wants (or wanted, depending on the version) for his wife to be cured and to live happily with her again. All of this is for her, either to help her or to avenge her.
That’s to say that yeah, if Danny managed to weasel his way into his heart, he would have a place with him forever.
He’d probably only interact with him at first because of the ice powers, but if Danny did manage to get closer to him (that’s a pretty big if) I think he’d do fucking anything for him, just like his wife.
He would raze the GiW to the ground for his boy.
They’d do alright probably. Nothing special, but it’d work out ok: Scarecrow, Ivy & Harley, Two-Face, Killer Croc.
Scarecrow is, funnily enough, not that bad. Like, is he genuinely deranged? Yes. Is he murderous and cruel? Yes. Does he have a moral compass that would absolutely support taking care of a child? Yes.
He’s been shown multiple times to genuinely care for people, even if it’s in his own way. Like, yeah, maybe fear-gas-themed murder and torture is a bit far sometimes, but it’s what he knows how to do.
Like, would he know how to take care of a kid? Hell no. But he does have a pretty good list of what not to do, courtesy of his own childhood, so he’d have a pretty alright start.
Ivy and Harley aren’t rated higher because I just don’t think they’d really be responsible enough for a child. I don’t doubt that they’d be able to love Danny, nor that they love each other, but they’re not very stable, and they don’t have a very good grasp on normalcy.
Like, they’d be incredibly cool aunts, or family friends, or something. I just don’t think that they’d do well being the sole guardians of a child or teenager.
I can’t stress this enough, I think they would genuinely love having Danny with all their hearts. I just don’t think that love alone is enough.
Avoiding that genuinely depressing thought, I think Two-Face would similarly be an awesome uncle to have, but wouldn’t do well at the actual “parenting” thing.
Like, he could keep a kid alive no problem, and he’d probably be awesome to have as a legal guardian and stuff, but there’s no way in hell he’d be able to keep Danny in line, for the sole reason of not really seeing a reason to.
However, if he got put in Arkham, he’d 100% not be above guilt-tripping Bruce into taking Danny in, so he does have backup options.
Killer Croc would be an awesome friend to Danny, but that man is in no way capable of being a parent.
He’s got a pretty short temper, and Danny is a little shit. There’d definitely be fighting. A lot of fighting. Croc still gets some points though because he’s a decent guy and I don’t doubt that he’d be willing to get help from the other rogues or even Batman should he need it.
Shouldn’t be trusted to keep a gerbil alive, yet are somehow still better at this than Maddie and Jack: The Riddler, Solomon Grundy
The Riddler is a childish, egotistical asshole with a bit of a god complex and a truckload of emotional baggage.
That being said, he’d still do better than Danny’s actual parents.
Partly because the bar is so low.
Like yeah, there’d be a lot of arguing, but I don’t think that he’d actually ever fight fight with Danny, mostly because he’d feel like he was turning into his father.
For the most part he’d be at the same level as Scarecrow or Killer Croc, I just put him lower because I think he’d forget to feed Danny sometimes. Still not as bad as the food coming alive to attack him though.
Solomon Grundy is pretty similar to Killer Croc in terms of how I think he and Danny would get along, I just think he’d be much worse at getting the things Danny needs to live and be happy.
He’d be cool as a weird uncle, or a friend, but he’d be pretty awful at being an actual parent.
The house is on fire, god is dead: Mad Hatter, Ra’s Al Ghul
Mad Hatter would have UNIMAGINABLE levels of beef with Danny. He would unironically throw hands with a child.
That being said, I think he’d genuinely like Danny.
Wouldn’t make up for anything, but I do think he’d at least not hate him.
Ra’s would be funny as hell no matter what.
He’d ALSO have unimaginable beef with Danny, but for entirely different reasons. He would spend all his time trying to convince Danny to become a member of the LOA and also to turn him fully immortal. Danny would buy him a “world’s okayest dad” mug and “I’m not the dad who stepped up” shirt. They would try to beat each other to death over Damian.
Danny would still probably choose him over Vlad in a heartbeat.
Getting dissected would have unironically been a better option: Joker
Your homework today is to watch Batman Beyond: Return of the Joker.
Because I know you won’t, I’m just gonna tell you that Joker has done some MK Ultra shit to a child before in order to mold it into a mini version of himself, and he’d absolutely do it again.
One of them would absolutely end up dead, and considering their track records, I’m not so sure it would be Joker.
#dcxdp#dc x dp#dp x dc#dpxdc#dp x dc crossover#catwoman isn’t on here because she would just give him to bruce immediately#on the bright side if Joker ever obtained another child through dubious means I don’t doubt that Harley and Ivy would beat him to death#honestly out of everyone here I think being adopted by two-face would be the most fun by far#like mr. freeze would be a lot better at being an actual parent but two-face would be fun as hell#also scarecrow would just straight up murder someone for bullying Danny this man is not above killing kids if they’re being dicks#he’s literally done the slasher routine for some girl after she found out her friends all hated her and he’d do it again#the penguin would kill for Danny too I just don’t think he’d kill kids#older teens are up for debate however
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