#stop this jun you're not even my bias go away

[maximura]

[dropintomanga]

Manga I Enjoyed in 2023

It's been another great year for manga. And I don't think we wouldn't have it any other way, right?

I got to read a bunch of manga, old and new, this year. But these titles stood out to me the the most.

Honorable Mention: Kindergarten WARS by You Chiba - This was something I needed, post-Assassination Classroom. A school filled with rich kids protected by assassins who have nowhere to go fighting against assassins trying to kill the kids. Not only that, the main female lead is desperate for a boyfriend and will date anyone who looks hot. But if they have certain peeves, the bodies will hit the floor. This is a really funny series with fun characters and a lot of action. It also has one of the best gags of the year.

Favorite Ongoing Weekly Manga: Akane-banashi by Yuki Suenaga and Takamase Moue - Akane-banashi continues to impress me every week. I absolutely love how every chapter continues to be impactful. Akane is still a refreshing protagonist and I love how it feels that even though she can win rakugo competitions based on sheer determination, Akane knows that she has a lot to learn. This is a stand-out manga that is excellent for teenagers.

Here's my top 5 manga of the year!

5.) A Home Far Away and The Yakuza's Bias by Teki Yatsuda (tie) - Once I got into K-Pop, I had to check out The Yakuza's Bias. I enjoyed a lot of the humor and the gags are well-done. It's a title that really showcases what it means to take a deep dive into fandom when you're new at it in hilarious fashion. But Yatsuda's debut work about 2 boys on the run is one of the best things I've read all year. It's truly a heartbreaking LGBT romance that will touch a lot of emotions. Also, Yatsuda's art is absolutely gorgeous and I can't wait to see their new work being licensed in the future.

4.) ZOM 100: Bucket List of the Dead by Haro Aso and Kotaro Tanaka - The only zombie manga story I read was Kengo Hanazawa's I Am A Hero, but I gave this title a follow because people were telling me about it due to its messaging. ZOM 100 stands out as an upbeat zombie apocalypse story that speaks to the resilience of people in tough times. I think we all forget that we can do great things in times of adversity if we all get support. There's some great moments in this series worth talking about. I never felt bored reading it. I'm glad I gave this manga a chance because I really think depressed people need to be told that while it's okay to feel the way they feel, they can still try and people shouldn't shame them for it.

3.) Kowloon Generic Romance by Jun Mayuzuki - Hong Kong nostalgia at its finest, in my opinion. This is one of the most fascinating stories of 2023 with regards to finding your identity and reconciling your past with your present. I have this high up because I really like how the central love story is slowly tying into a bigger mystery on why the world in the manga seems very off. People struggle so much with their pasts and I feel that this manga resonates with those folks. Especially me as I find myself longing for past moments that I dearly miss despite having not-so-pleasant experiences I would like to forget.

2.) Chainsaw Man Part II by Tatsuki Fujimoto - I absolutely adore this series. Fujimoto pulls no stops in telling the story he wants to tell. I love the new female characters that have all shown up and the return of a very notable one. I like Denji's development as he really doesn't know what he wants despite being granted a frightening power that continues to be a target to those who want to use him. This is the story of a "hero" who doesn't have the resilience to be an actual hero. It's also a story about people having their emotional needs warped into desires in the worst way.

1.) The Summer Hikaru Died by Mokumokuren - I normally don't read horror manga, but this manga is phenomenal. There was so much hype about the manga being released here in the U.S. and it has delivered in all cylinders. The art is great. The usage of sound effects to convey a sense of dread is top-notch. The interpersonal dynamic between the two main characters is frighteningly realistic. This manga, at its core, about dealing with a relationship that should've ended, but didn't. As much as we talk about needing relationships with people to survive, they have to end sometimes. There's a lot of horror and dread over how to talk about a relationship ending and good god, the manga delivers on displaying that. I also love the subtle reminder that bad relationships have serious consequences for everyone else. In real life, we've seen how abuse and interpersonal trauma trickles down from the victim into other parts of life and other people. All of this makes The Summer Hikaru Died my top manga of 2023.

I hope you all enjoyed my top picks. There's been a lot of fun reads that I probably missed out on, so let me know what you guys enjoyed. 2024 is probably going to be another great year for manga and there's already titles I'm looking forward to.

See you all in 2024!

[starlit-serenade]

Secret

🤍 Summary: One of the hardest parts of secretly dating a K-Pop idol is getting shipped with the wrong member of the group.

🤍 Word Count: 2,700 words

🤍 Pairing: Reader x Kang Yuchan (Chan) / Characters: GenderNeutral!Reader; Kang Yuchan (Chan); Kim Byeongkwan; Kim Sehyoon (Wow); Lee Donghun (Donghun); Park Junhee (Jun);

🤍 Rated: E / Warnings: None? Cute kisses that make me feel so painfully single / Genre: Fluff and minor Angst

🤍 A/N: Thank you so so so much for requesting! Also I struggled with the name for so long and it's kind of lazily named but I guess that's what happens when I write for three and a half days straight, huh?

It's been about five years since you became friends with Kim Byeongkwan. Four years since you first met Kang Yuchan. Three years since they debuted with A.C.E. And two years since you started secretly dating Yuchan.

It has never been a secret that you were friends with the A.C.E members. Choice, generally, never minds that you're that you were friends with the boys. In fact, most of Choice loves you. They usually point out when you showed up in videos and VLives, saying "There's Y/Nie!" and often joke about you being the sixth member of A.C.E and even their bias, since you hung out with them so much.

To everyone, you're publicly A.C.E's best friend. No one knows you're dating Chan, except for the members and staff. You and Chan made that decision together to keep your relationship a secret from the fans, at least for now. You agreed that at some point, you'd tell them, but agreed, two years ago, that it was too early.

And it isn't terrible. You've grown comfortable in your role as A.C.E's friend. You have a lot of fun despite not being open about your relationship. And everyone, for the most part, loves you.

But there are, of course, cons to secretly dating an idol. You can't go out on public dates and have them be such obvious dates. Thankfully, you're close enough with all five members that you hold all of their hands and hug them all, so no one finds it strange when you hold Chan's hands. But that means no kisses or anything unless you're inside of a building, in a room where no one unwanted can see. But you don't mind as much.

One of you and Chan's biggest supporters is Byeongkwan. One of your best friends. Even after you and Chan started dating, you and Byeongkwan spent a lot of time together. You and Byeongkwan often go shopping together, get ice cream together, mess with each other during filming and tease each other during VLives. No wonder you two are more shipped than you and your actual boyfriend.

That's right. You've skimmed through the YouTube comments beneath Behind videos. Read through the chat under VLive replays where you showed up. You've even seen the chats live yourself. More than half of the viewers ship you with Byeongkwan.

At first, you didn’t mind. You would laugh about it with Chan and Byeongkwan, because you guys knew that what the fans say don't affect how much you care about and love Chan. But it's been about a year, and it feels kind of weird. You have no idea how Chan feels about it. You don't really talk about that with him.

You're sitting between Chan and Byeongkwan during a VLive right now, all on the floor of the practice room. Chan, who sits to your left, is talking intensely with Sehyoon about something funny that happened yesterday, and you're peering over Byeongkwan's shoulder to look at the phone, which has the VLive playing. The chat, as usual, is filled with fans.

'Chan looks cute today,' one fan says.

'Sehyoon, why are you always so handsome?' asks another.

'Aww, Byeongkwan and Y/Nie always look so cute together.'

You and Byeongkwan make eye contact and start snickering. You are cute friends. Even Chan says you two are cute friends. But when the fans say it, it means they think you two are dating.

"What are you two kids giggling about?" Sehyoon asks, eyebrow raised.

"Nothing!" you and Byeongkwan say at the same time, before giggling again. No wonder everyone ships you two. It really shows that you're close friends. Since you and Chan keep most of your relationship off-camera, it sometimes almost looks like Chan is the member you're least close to. Of course you'll be shipped with Byeongkwan instead of your actual boyfriend.

You look from Sehyoon to Chan, who is smiling at you softly. Teasingly, you stick your tongue out at him, and he laughs.

"What's the chat saying?" Chan asks curiously. He looks over at the phone for a minute, reading,  then laughs. "I see."

He resumes talking to Sehyoon. Now they're talking about their thoughts on recent comebacks that they've seen and upcoming comebacks that they're excited for.

The VLive ends, and all four of you stand up. You take Chan's hand in yours and squeeze it. He kisses the back of your hand and continues to hold it as the two of you leave the room.

"Chan," you say, walking with him down the hallway, hand in hand.

"Yes, Baby?"

"How do you feel about the fans shipping me with Byeongkwan?" you ask.

He thinks for a moment, stopping you two in the middle of the hallway. You lean against the wall, his hand in yours as he looks you in the eyes.

"I don't love it," he says with a sigh. "But that's what comes with us secretly dating, isn't it? We knew this was going to happen when we decided to keep our relationship a secret. And it doesn't change how much I love you, Y/Nie."

You smile, your cheeks feeling warm, and you look down. "I love you too, Chan."

"And Y/Nie--" You look back up at him. "--if you are thinking about maybe telling the fans about us, we can talk about it. And we can talk to management to see if we can do that. Okay?"

"Okay."

"Good." He pecks a quick kiss on your lips, and you smile softly. You hug him closer so that your noses are brushing against each other as you giggle against each other's lips.

"I love you, Yuchan."

"I love you more, Y/N."

"No you don't. I love you more."

"Ya!" Chan pulls away from you in surprise and you see that Sehyoon is standing nearby, laughing. "The hallway isn't your space to make out, kids. Go make out in a room somewhere else."

"Two strawberry smoothies, please and one strawberry banana," you say. After you pay, the person behind the counter hands you the drinks. You hand a strawberry smoothie to Byeongkwan and the strawberry banana one to Donghun, keeping the second strawberry one for yourself.

It's been a day since the VLive. Today, Chan is busy doing something that's work related with Jun and Sehyoon, so Donghun and Byeongkwan decided to take you out for smoothies and a walk in the park.

The three of you walk together, Donghun on your left and Byeongkwan on your right, chatting about the going-ons of your lives. Since you're dating Chan and are best friends with Byeongkwan, you already spend most of your days with the members. But hearing about what the other boys are up to when you're alone with Chan or at work is nice.

"Anyway, Chan's still our youngest and he's still a baby," Donghun says after explaining something silly Chan did yesterday. Something that Chan already told you about, but hearing Donghun and Byeongkwan's sides of the story is funny as well.

"Y/Nah," Byeongkwan says. "When was the last time you guys went on a date."

You frown, thinking. You and Chan haven't gone on a one-on-one date in a long time, since if you were to go on dates just the two of you in public too often, it would risk your relationship being exposed before you wanted it to be.

"Last time we went out together might have been two weeks ago," you say. "He came over to my home a couple days ago. And I went over to the dorm last week. But us going out . . ."

Donghun nods. "You two should be able to go on a date today after he's done working with Jun and Sehyoon. It won't be suspicious since you went out with us today."

"Yeah, we were planning on going to a coffee shop," you say. "And then maybe going back to my apartment to hang out. Maybe snuggle."

"Cute," Donghun says.

"Yes, they are so cute!" Byeongkwan hugs you and pinches your cheek. You laugh.

Suddenly, Donghun's phone makes a loud notification sound, and he nearly jumps in surprise. He takes it out and smiles at you. "Perfect timing! Sehyoon just texted to tell me they're done with working."

You, Donghun and Byeongkwan get back to the building and find Jun, Sehyoon and Chan sitting in the recording studio. You lean Chan's chair, over his shoulder, and kiss him on the cheek.

"What're you guys working on?" you ask.

"We're working on ironing out some schedule conflicts that came up," he says. He kisses your cheek, and then the corner of your mouth. "You want to go out on our date?"

You nod, humming. Someone clears their throat, and you and Chan look at the other side of the room, where the four other members are staring at you two.

"Please go on your date," Sehyoon sighs. He's clearly tired of seeing you and Chan kissing in every other room in the building over the course of the past two years.

You and Chan walk to the coffee shop nearest to your home, hand in hand as you two talk about your day. On the way, you tell him that you got smoothies with Donghun and Byeongkwan and that you had a good day, and he smiles.

"Good to hear that you had a goof time," he hums, squeezing your hand. You want to kiss him on the cheek, but since you're out in public, you can't. You pout inwardly. You hate that you can hold his hand in public but not kiss him.

You reach the coffee shop and order your drinks. As you two wait for your drinks to come out, you check your Twitter for the current things going on. Someone is preparing for a comeback. Someone injured themselves.

After a moment, you see your own name. Someone has posted a picture of you, Jun and Byeongkwan getting smoothies together. Byeongkwan, in the picture, is hugging you and pinching your cheek as you laugh at him. The comments beneath the photo are all saying similar things.

'Oh my gosh, they're so cute together!' someone says.

'I wouldn't be surprised if they were dating,' another person says. 'They'd make such a cute couple.'

'Weren't they friends predebut?' another Twitter user asks. 'That would be so cute if they've been dating since then.'

"Y/Nah, what's that frown for?"

You look up at Chan, who's smiling at you softly, eyebrows knitted with concern. You shake your head.

"Nothing," you say.

"That's not true. I know when you're lying, Y/Nie," he teases. You show him your phone, and he reads through the tweets slowly.

You watch his face for a reaction, but he's almost unreadable. "I see," he says. Then he smiles at you. "Let's talk more later, okay?"

"Okay."

You collect your drinks and walk toward your home. You think about how everytime you go out with Byeongkwan, the fans talk nonstop about how you're so cute together and you'd make such a great couple. But whenever you go out with Chan, there are very few people who react the same. It's not that you hate being shipped with Byeongkwan. He's great and it one of your best friends. When the shipping started, you found it funny. But it almost feels like the fans want you to be with Byeongkwan, and you worry that if you and Chan were to announce your relationship, the fans would be disappointed.

You both arrive at your apartment, and as you enter, Chan sits down on the couch. He beckons you over, and hugs you close when you sit down.

"Do we want to talk about it?" Chan asks. You nod. "Okay, then."

"It just stresses me out," you say. "I feel like I'm your secret. And I want to tell them, but at this point I'm scared they'll be disappointed that I'm with you and not Byeongkwan."

"Y/Nah." Chan takes your face in his hands, cupping your cheeks and squishing them so that your lips stick out a bit. "The fans love you so much that they won't care if you're with me or Byeongkwan or anyone else. They'll be happy and support you--support us--either way. I trust them that much. And hey, if they don't, who cares? I love you so much that it wouldn't matter. Okay? It's okay."

He kisses you, and you giggle, kissing him back. After a moment, you pull away and take his hands in your own.

"You don't care that they ship me and Byeongkwan so much?" you ask. "You're not jealous?" Chan shakes his head.

"Not really, no. Because I know that Byeongkwan is your friend, and I trust you both," he says. You hum happily and kiss the tip of his nose, which makes him smile softy.

"Chan," you say after a moment. He raises his eyebrow curiously. "I think I'm ready to tell them."

His smile widens, and his eyes twinkle with excitement. "Really?"

You nod, squeezing his hands. "Really."

"You guys are going to reveal it with a Twitter selca?" Donghun asks. You and Chan look at each other and nod.

You had talked with management this morning, and all agreed that you didn't want to make a huge statement about it. Chan will post a picture with you on Twitter, somewhat casually announcing that you and him are together. Beat Interactive will post a short statement confirming your relationship, stating that you've been together for two years and are very happy together.

"About time!" Sehyoon yells from the other side of the room. "Does this mean you'll stop making out in the hallways and studio and finally go on dates outside instead?"

"Probably not," Chan says, and Sehyoon laughs, amused. He seems to have accepted the fact that you and Chan will continue to be disgustingly cute, whether in public or in private.

"Are you going to take the picture today?" Donghun asks. You nod.

"Of course they are!" Byeongkwan says. "Y/Nie dresses up nicely today! This is their favorite shirt. Do you guys want us to take the pictures for you?"

"No thank you," you say. "We wanted to take them ourselves."

"Good luck!" Byeongkwan says, giving you a tight hug. After he pulls away, he gives you both a thumbs up. "They'll support you two. I know it!"

"Thank you, Byeongkwan," you say.

Chan posts the photos later that day. Two photos, taken in the practice room One in which you and Chan are making a heart with your hands together, both of you smiling at the camera. The second photo is almost the same, except Chan is kissing your cheek. The caption, written by Chan, reads 'I love you very much Y/Nie!! And I trust and love Choice, too!!'

You and Chan read through the comments together while leaning against the wall of the practice room, smiling the entire time.

'They're so cute! Chan always looks at Y/Nie with so much love!' a commenter says.

'Y/Nie is so lucky! And so is Chan! They're perfect for each other!' says another.

'They're always so cute together. You can tell they love each other very much. I'm so happy for them," another fan says.

As you and Chan read through the positive comments, you feel very warm and happy inside. You give Chan's hand a squeeze and he smiles at you. He knows what you're thinking, and you know he's thinking it too. The fans love and support you and Chan, and you were both right to trust them.

"I love you, Yuchan," you say, snuggling closer to him. You really enjoy the feeling of not feeling like a secret. And you know that the next time you go out with Chan, you'll be more confident, now that you're going to be able to kiss each other and call each other pet names.

"I love you too, Y/Nie."

"You two are disgustingly cute," Sehyoon says from where he's sitting with the other members. You wrinkle your nose at him teasingly, and he laughs.

[dontjudgemebymykpoptrash]

Saw A.C.E in Chicago and Atlanta this week and had meet and greet packages for both stops (no I couldn't afford it, yes my bank account overdrafted whoops).

It was ammazingggg. LONG STORY AHEAD.

The question I asked was answered by Chan. Bless his heart he struggled so much to say my name and I was in the second row on the furthest side from him. I stood up and waved so he could see me. They asked how to pronounce my name and BK actually said it perfectly, I was so impressed!

The question that was chosen was "What hobby do you want to try that you haven't tried before". He said Cooking, cause he isn't good at it and Donghun won't eat his food.

When the item signing started, BK would interact with us a lot and the girls in front of us took the liberty of teaching him the phrase "Let's get this bread." His face when they explained that bread = money was priceless. Experiencing that magical moment will live with me forever since he has been saying it nonstop since then.

So since PLT I've decided my "thing" for each autograph I can get is making my dumb pun fans. Eventually I'll just have a wall of these dang things and I'm excited about it. I made one for each my friend and me. Here's mine.

The other thing I prepared for them I kept super secret because I very much wanted to see their reaction to it. I didn't post it publicly anywhere. In line with Choice teasingly referring to Junhee as a lizard much to the delight of the fandom and the rest of A.C.E while hysterically bugging Jun, I couldn't resist... I'd always wanted to give away cute things at concerts but since I'm also an asshole I used my exceptionally mediocre photoshop skills to make

These beauties.

I originally only had 150 to hand out and I was actually worried I wouldn't be able to get rid of them all. I thought people might think they're dumb and not want any. Then due to a print shop mistake I ended up with 650. Whoops.

Before the meet and greet they tell us explicitly we are not allowed to give them anything and if they catch us trying to sneak them something they'll escort us out. My plan to see their reaction was almost destroyed! But I was very graciously given permission to -show- them the card, not give it to them (don't worry. They each got two in their gift boxes).

A.C.E tends to always stand/sit in the same order, so just as I expected, Chan was up first. He understood the pun of my fan! He thought it was really cute and gave such a big reaction I was pleased. Then I showed him the card and it was even bigger. I told him it was Junhee and he full on kicked out a leg and hit the table as he laughed which made me happy. He shook my hand.

Up next was Donghun who was the most quiet. I showed him the card after he signed my fan and he asked who it was. I told him it was Jun and he laughed and probably judged me a lot but then he gave me a high five and interlaced our fingers for a moment so I didn't feel completely embarrassed. The person behind me was so excited they moved onto Donghun before Jun was ready for me so I was waiting in limbo for a few seconds.

Leader Jun in the middle, the reaction I wanted most. He signed my fan and then I put the card down for him to see. He asked who it was, he seemed surprised. I told him it was him and he laughed and tried to deny it. He asked what kind of lizard it was, I told him it was a giant day gecko because I think they're the cutest. I told him I made sure to give them some in their gift box, and that we would see him again in Atlanta. He shook my hand and then the person behind me got excited again lol.

Byeongkwan was next! This boy is an absolute doll okay? The first thing he said to me is that he liked my lipstick (it was green). He signed my fan, then I showed him the card and he was beyond stoked. He laughed so loud and even held it up to Jun pointing it out to everyone. I promised him he got two in his gift box. He asked if I made one of each member and I told him no, but promised him I would next year (me and my big mouth). He held my hand and interlaced fingers and was just so sweet until the person behind me encouraged me on again.

WOW. OKAY. So Sehyoon is my bias af I was VISIBLY SHAKING at this point and as I set my fan down it so obnoxiously tapped the table several times. He tapped his lips and pointed at mine and said "pretty". I thanked him and said it was green for "cactus". I'm not sure if he understood cause he just repeated "cactus" and cocked his head slightly before signing my fan. Then I showed him the card. He asked who it was and I said Jun. He laughed a little and then I told him he was my favorite. He had the quietest lil thank you, then took my hand in both his soft tiny bby hands and I think my brain melted cause I couldnt make eye contact anymore it was too much. Just thinking about it is making my heart hurt. (To be clear, I am in no way special, he held everyone's hand the same way).

After that, we did the pictures! I very shyly wanted to stand between BK and Wow. I didn't do anything special this time around cause the pose I wanted was done by two other people so I just asked for cute cheek pokies. They were having so much fun with people so that inspired my next photo request. As I was walking away from the photo BK told me again that he really liked my lipstick and I was over the moon.

I brought about half the cards with me to hand out hoping I wouldn't have extras and people LOVED THEM? I ran out and felt bad that I didn't bring more!

The concert was AWESOME!! They're so interactive with fans I had several moments with EACH of them, but my favorite is when Wow kicked up a heart and he saw me catch it all goofy instead of letting him hit the woah and he laughed and mimicked me. He also handed me two lollipops (I gave one to my friend) but I'm never gonna eat it.

For the hi touch Chan handed us our photo cards, and hi fived us. They were oddly out of order (chan, Donghun, BK, Wow, Jun). I managed to tell him and Donghun they did amazing, then BK told me AGAIN he still loved my lips. I was so excited I told him "it'll be BLUE next time" and he said "oh!" BUT BY DOING THAT MY DUMBASS MISSED THE CHANCE TO LOOK INTO WOW'S AND JUN'S EYES UGH I WAS SO UPSET AT MYSELF also I got yelled at by security (rightly so).

Next is Atlanta!

I started handing out cards earlier and got worried again cause there were quite a few people that weren't interested at all. Fortunately by the end of the show there were so many people wanting them I offered to do a reprint if necessary. Some people even said they were going through the hi touch holding it up which I LOVED.

Anyway, this time during the Meet and Greet I was in the front row directly in front Byeongkwan and Wow. I WAS NOT OKAY. I kept making eye contact and getting so shy ugh. Byeongkwan recognized me and tapped his lips and winked when he saw me (I was wearing blue lipstick this time). BK got my question (the interpreter said my name perfectly without me needing to tell her, I was so impressed!) I asked what concept they wanted to try that they hadn't tried yet. He said they had already done everything and I cocked my head giving him a disbelieving look. He then admitted that they hadn't done the cutesy boy concept and I lost it- I cant imagine them trying to pull that off.

For future Choice in my position- these boys have ears like BATS okay. There was one time Jun said something like "it's his choice." And I quietly said to the person next to me "no we're choice." And he looked at me and said "You're right! You're all choice!" I was shook.

Wow got asked what his favorite dessert to eat is and he said chocolate anything, then listed things "Chocolate cake. Chocolate ice cream. Chocolate rice." At this point everyone exclaims and he gets his silly lil smile and says "Chocolate fish." And everyone loses it. It was so funny and cute.

Later Jun was asked if he preferred pancakes or waffles and it was a really hard question for him. He said he had been eating more pancakes since coming to the US but he liked both a lot. He just didn't like Chocolate pancakes and I said "cause Wow eats them all?" And wow just very dreamily says "Choco pancakes...." I about died.

BK was asked if he wanted to go to the aquarium and he said he really hoped to. He asked if there were beluga and everyone said yes but I said "But they have WHALE SHARKS!" which imo is the coolest thing about the Georgia aquarium. None of them seemed to know exactly what I meant but they were excited by the concept of the words "whale" and "shark" together. (Spoiler alert: The next day they totally went and got pics with the whale shark).

Finally BK asked where people recommended they eat. Someone suggested sushi at first. I thought it was funny to recommend sushi when visiting the US. BK seemed of the same mindset so chicken and waffles came up and Jun loudly said WAFFLES! To which, Wow said in his same dreamy tone "chocolate waffles" and I looked at him and said "chocolate chicken?" embarrassing the HELL out of myself cause everyone was super grossed out by it and making a scene. I hid but my friend said Wow thought it was funny. I think she was trying to make me feel better.

So the item signing time comes up. My DUMB ASS forgot my album at home so the day before I had gone on a panicked shopping spree and decided on a pot for my cactus.

Chan was up first as usual. He recognized me and asked if I was in Chicago and I said yes! He asked what the pot was and I told him it was for my cactus plant. He was so adorable, while he was signing it he said quietly "grow well." So now it has to. This time he did not do a high five with me.

Next was Donghun. He looked so confused at my pot. I told him it was for my cactus and he just kinda nodded. It was very quiet because I had tried to learn a short phrase for him in korean but I got too nervous and I couldn't say it. I just thanked him. I'll have to keep practicing.

Jun was next and also asked me if I had been in Chicago and thanked me for coming again. I told him it was my last stop but I knew they would keep doing amazing. He asked about the pot and said it was so cute and signed super big. He shook my hand.

BK was next and he complimented my lips again. I asked him if he liked the green or blue better and he said both were good. He asked about the pot and signed it for me, he said it was cute and he liked it. He high fived me when it was time to move on.

WOW. AGAIN. okay so he asked about the pot and I said it was for my cactus and he mimed planting a cactus while looking up at me and I nodded while melting cause he is SO GODDAMN CUTE OKAY. Then while he was signing it I worked up my courage cause I had tried to learn a phrase for him as well BUT I MESSED UP I MESSED UP SO BAD IT WAS BAD OKAY. He was so confused and thank GOD the interpreter was right there and she asked "what are you trying to say" and she helped me say it. I was SO EMBARRASSED I had practiced so much and was saying it SO WELL up until that moment. Once I managed he smiled and said I did good then took my hand and said something which the interpreter translated for me and I just grabbed my heart with my free hand and then had to just cover my face I couldnt handle it. Walking away was hard but staying was harder.

Of course that just put me back in my seat directly in front of him.

Dont judge me, but I was trying to say, "You're so awesome it makes my heart hurt." And his response was "Then I'll prescribe you some medicine" and I KNOW its cheesy and overdone but I wanted that moment once for me so I took my chance. Anyway I looked like a damn fool but it was over.

The last dumb thing I did as the signing went on cause we kept making random eye contact and I got self conscious of always looking away. One of the times Wow and I met eyes I winked and shot finger guns and his eyebrows raised ever so slightly and I wanted to sink into the floor and die so I hid my face again. He looked so surprised like what WAS I THINKING WHY DID I DO THAT AAAAAAAA.

Anyway.

Here's my cute cheap pot!

Next was pictures. This time I had a plan. I asked them to pose ugly with me. They were surprised and asked for clarification twice, BK even asked me in english and I said "yes, ugly faces. If you can! If it's even possible." I wonder if it's the first time theyve ever been requested to do that. Anyway that's gonna be my thing too with the punny fan from now on. They did their best and it's absolutely adorable. Afterward BK walked up to me and wanted to see the pictures I took so I showed him. After he walked away it occured to me how fun and casual that was, that he just came over to look at pics together. I love this boy so much damb.

The atlanta show was amazing but the stage was so high up and far away there was no direct interaction possible. They made up for it with even more interaction! BK and Donghun each danced with me. I made a heart with my friend and Chan winked and laughed cause it looked like she begrudgingly made the heart with me when in reality she just couldnt hear me and couldnt tell what I was asking. Wow played a heart escalating game with me and he won so I made a dumb cute face and he laughed.

At hi touch I was determined not to miss Wow again. The order was the same except Donghun and Chan switched. I told them they did really amazing, a great show! Then BK said "Best lips!" To me and I got so excited but still didnt want to miss Wow, I loudly repeated "Best Lips!" While making eye contact and high fiving this poor man so hard, then for Jun I said "Don't forget!" And he was just so unprepared for me because I was unprepared for me but I WAS SO HYPED UP I LOST MY LAST BRAINCELL ITS STILL IN ATLANTA GUYS ITS GONE FOREVER.

So anyway that was a lot of unnecessary details about my specific adventures with A.C.E and I loved them so much and maybe one person will read this and smile but mostly I just want to try and remember as much detail as possible. I'll add things as I remember if I forgot something. Anyway dont be like me hahahaHAHAHA.

Also highkey if BK or one of the boys ends up with a bold lipstick color for a comeback or promotions in the next year or so I'm taking full credit.

[shra-vasti]

MAKES ME WONDER [4/40] The Escape

→ Synopsis : Your dream to attend a Seventeen concert was finally coming true but you weren't prepared for the events that were going to follow after Joshua made eye contact with you and chose to make you his partner for the mini game and take you out on a date as a winning prize.

→ Genre : fluff, slice of life

→ Type : Idol x fan au

→ Word count : 1.9k

→ Taglist : @mngyuheart @vannie24 @uglyratlmao @rjsmochii @dwcljh @noniesgirl (let me know if you want to be added to the taglist)

→ Pairing : idol!Joshua x fan!reader

→ Main Seventeen Masterlist

→ Makes Me Wonder Masterlist

You started walking towards where Joshua was standing, his back facing you as the cameraman told you to start. You stopped when you reached a proper distance and politely called him just the way the cameraman explained you to. 

He turned around shyly smiling at you as he bowed and you did the same following his lead. 

"You look good."

He smiled at you nodding his head unlike earlier when he just showered you with how beautiful you look. 

"Thanks, but I can't compare to you, you always look really good with or without makeup."

Joshua wanted to laugh at how the conversation was going, it felt so foreign, he had to bite back his smile to not appear too happy with your company although he was aching to scream just how alive he was feeling in your presence. 

"No no, all the carats are really beautiful, I hope you're ready for our date."

"Yes yes please lead the way." 

You were a shy person but the cameraman had asked you to be really flustered all the time and behave exaggeratedly everytime he did something and you wondered if they asked every fan to do this since you always see the other carats being so flustered in their presence. 

The cameraman had told that you were exceptionally calm about all this date thing and that you had to act flustered around him to which you reluctantly agreed. Maybe it was just you. 

Joshua opened the cafe's door for you like the gentlemen he was and you thanked him shyly before going past him to choose a seat. 

You chose a seat which was near the door, there weren't many people in the cafe since it was booked prior for the date. 

The waiter came asking what you wanted to order and both of you gave him the orders before turning towards each other to talk about things till the time your order came. 

"So y/n what's your favorite seventeen song?" 

"Ah this one is hard, I love all of the songs but vocal units songs hold a special place in my heart."

He grinned widely at your answer, feeling a sense of pride that he was a part of the vocal unit and somehow finding relief in the fact that you indirectly hold a special place for him in your heart. 

He mentally cringed at his own thoughts. 

"Is that so? Who's your favorite member then?" 

He didn't know why he was feeling so edgy about your answer, he could see your ears getting red as you fidgeted with your fingers. 

"I really adore BooSeokSoon."

You look up to see his face being an epitome of disappointment as he looked sharply at you before laughing at you. He wanted to keep being bitter about your favorite member being on the gag trio but he remembered that he was being filmed so he couldn't be as free with you. 

"Which is your favorite unit?" 

"Hiphop unit of course, they are so cool and they always have some of the most inspiring and savage lyrics to jam on."

He narrowed his eyes at you again not feeling happy with your answer and you just laughed. 

"I see you're a fan of the Hip hop unit, what about your favorite song to dance to since you're so good at dancing? Is it rocket?" 

"No it's swimming fool, the song gives me a different sort of adrenaline rush and I can't do anything but feel happy when it's on."

"Yah, you say you adore the vocal unit but your favorite members are Seokmin, Soonyoung and Seungkwan but then you say your favorite unit is hip hop but your go to song is swimming fool which is of the performance unit."

You just laughed at him, pausing for a second since your drinks were being served. 

"Shall I tell you a secret?" 

You whispered him but loud enough so it would get caught in the mic attached on your shirt. 

"What is it?" 

"You can't choose a bias in Seventeen, it's either take all or none, seriously, I want to give standing ovations to each of the carats who only have one bias in Seventeen."

The laugh which escaped his lips after that was like music to your ears and you couldn't help but be proud of yourself for being the reason behind it, you actually wanted to make him laugh more. 

"I feel bad for the carats then but happy at the same time."

You just smiled at him finishing up your drink when the cameraman informed you two have a 10 minutes break before continuing the filming again. 

"I'm so proud of you, you are doing great."

"Is that so? I'm really nervous though, I'm glad that I don't have to be surrounded by the cameras all day, I feel bad for you guys sometimes."

Joshua smiled at you but it didn't reach his eyes like it did, it was almost as if he was agreeing with you that it was indeed hard to be surrounded by cameras all the time. 

"Sometimes I feel jealous of others who live their life the way they want but I kind of signed myself up for this so I can't complain plus I love being with the boys and I love that we can be the inspiration for so many carats out there."

He wasn't sure why he was telling all of these things to you, he needed to be happy in front of his fans all the time but he didn't feel obligated to do so in your presence which eased him up and at the same time burdened him too. 

You were just a fan, this date was all a setup, nothing was real and he wouldn't see you ever after this or spend time with you the same but he still felt as if he wasn't doing anything wrong talking about his tension with you. 

You reached your hand to pat his which was on the table and give it a little squeeze, smiling a little at him. 

"It's hard and I'm so proud that you have come this far and not given up."

"I'm happy that I didn't give up too, otherwise how would I have met you?" 

You felt blush rise up on your cheeks again at his remark and he couldn't help but feel his heart doing weird things looking at you. 

He leaned back on his chair, looking at the ceiling before looking back at you. 

"I do wish I could have just one day where I could live life as freely as possible, it's just an impossible dream but I want to if I could."

You weren't sure if you would sound creepy or crazy but you couldn't help yourself and playfully suggested the first thought that came into your mind after hearing his wish. 

"Why don't we do that then? Let's escape."

He looked at you, eyebrows creased without saying anything, he looked like he was contemplating. 

"Let's do it."

You straightened your back as soon as those three words left his mouth. Was he serious about it? You suggested it to him in a playful manner. 

"What if you get punishment for it later? The last thing I want is for you to go through any rough time because of this."

You looked in the direction of the cameraman and his assistants who were busy going through the clip which both of you had filmed earlier. 

"Well it would be adventurous and I don't mind getting a handful of scolding in return of my wish, I would be smiling from ears to ears even if I'll get the scolding."

The excited look which he wore on his face was enough for you to oblige to this mundane idea, you wanted to see him happy and if you had to help him for that, you didn't mind getting into trouble, at least you would be happy to make his wish come true.

"Okay, if that's what you want, let's do it."

He smiled widely before getting in the stance of running before you stopped him. 

"On the count of three and we will make a run towards the left side of this cafe since I know some small streets which will lead us to a different part of this city and others won't be able to track us down for a while."

He nodded his head at you already feeling the adrenaline running in his veins way too exciting. 

"One, two, three, run."

He took one look at the busy cameraman and his assistant before holding your hand and making a run outside of the cafe and into his one day freedom.

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"What do you mean by he ran away from the filming set with his fan?" 

Seungkwan heard his manager yell behind the door as he motioned the rest of the members to come towards him and listen to the conversation going on behind the door. 

"So you want to say he was talking with that fan and you were busy monitoring the clip and then when you went to explain to them about the further scene they disappeared and you tried looking for them but no one could find him or the fan?" 

The members looked at each other, their eyes widened unable to believe what they heard was true. 

"What am I going to tell PDnim? Of course I'm not going to tell him about this, he will cut my head off this isn't funny, he doesn't even has his phone with him, I know he'll be back all we can do is just wait, but I swear will give him an earful when he returns, I didn't expect this from him."

There was a long pause as the members exchanged looks with each other worriedly, what was going inside Joshua's mind to run away like that? Didn't he care about his image? Sometimes they couldn't understand their own member's antics. 

"I won't let this matter go up to PDnim, let's just tell him that we only shoot a short clip for the documentary because we were going to show a very little part of the date so it wasn't necessary for them to have a long date."

The door opened as all of the members stumbled inside the room and onto each other. 

"Yah Boo Seungkwan get off me!"

"Sorry Jeonghan Hyung but Jun Hyung is on top of me I can't."

"Lee Seokmin stop kicking my face!"

"I'm sorry I'm just trying to get up."

The manager just sighed before helping the members up, giving them a tired look as they waited for him to say anything. 

"Joshua ran away from the cafe he was supposed to have a date with the fan but both of them ran away and now everything is just a mess, he doesn't have his phone with him so we can't contact him, I know he'll come back soon but I'm going to scold him, he's one of the eldest he should be responsible and Seungcheol I want you to talk with him about this too."

"What goes inside his mind?" Seungcheol mumbled massaging his head, all of this information already giving him a headache. 

"If I was in his place I would have run away with her too, she's beautiful."

Everyone just glared at Seokmin who suddenly found a newfound interest in his shoes. 

"Let's just ask him about his adventure when he comes back, we all know he may have taken the chance to ease up his mind a bit, Joshua is responsible so he wouldn't do anything to ruin the group's image, let's go and relax,we don't get such free time frequently."

Everyone nodded their head at Jeonghan's word, retreating back to their respective rooms.