#stop acting like your friends asking you for help is a burden

[arcanecor3]

Sister parallels.

Okay so, this is me trying my best to explain my view of the parallel between these 2 scenes

Firstly, a little thing to keep in mind is that in this parallel, s2 Cait represents s1 Vi and s2 Vi represents Powder 

A big fight just happened, s1’s was the Vander rescue mission and s2’s was find Jinx, and both ended up going wrong because of someone who was supposed to help (Powder; s2Vi). After everything goes down at the s1 warehouse, we see Vi screaming and she is angry (i’ll come back to that later), and then Powder shows up with the “my monkey bomb finally worked” line we all know, and on s2 we have Caitlyn being the angry one because Vi didn’t let her shoot.

a little parallel with the lines:

“you did this?”-s1vi to powder

“you stopped me”-s2cait to vi

“i was saving you”-powder to s1vi

“that was a kid! what if you missed?”- s2vi to cait

Now, both s1 Vi and s2 Cait are blinded by anger and grief, so even tho the other person (Powder; s2vi) is explaining themselves (in Powder’s case it wasn’t the greatest explanation, but she does states that it was an accident, and s2 Vi was being rational), they don’t really listen because of all the anger.

then, Vi slaps powder, making her fall, and that’s when Powder desperately asks: “why did you leave me?” to which Vi answers: “because you’re a jinx! do you hear me? mylo was right". Now on s2, basically the same thing happens, just in a different order: s2 Cait says: “I keep telling myself that you’re different. but you’re not. it’s her (Jinx’s) blood that runs in your veins”, then Vi asks her: “then why are you the one acting like her?” and Caitlyn hits vi, knocking her to the ground. AND IN S2 WE EVEN GET A SHOT OF ANGRY CAITLYN LOOKING AT VI CRYING, JUST LIKE S1 VI LOOKED ANGRY AT POWDER CRYING. LIKE HOW SICK AND TWISTED IS THAT.

Then both s1 Vi and s2 Cait walk away, leaving the other one crying alone on the floor. 

The thing is that crying is the exactly what we expect from Powder, since that’s how she was during the entire scene, because that’s how her character is. but not Vi. Because during the entire of the s2 scene vi wasn’t actually crying, in fact, Vi barely cries in the whole show, the only time we see her actually sobbing is during the bridge scene from s1e1, when she saw her dead parents. And since then, she has trained and fought to become a person who can protect those she loves. And even when everything goes down at the s1 warehouse, we only get to see her a glimpse of her crying before she tried to go back to powder, but she’s mainly angry, that’s the way Vi usually reacts to these situations. She gets angry. And she tries to do everything in her power to go after who hurt her/the people she loves.

But this s2 scene is different. She simply has nowhere to go. Once again, she lost everything. Her family? dead. you might argue there’s Jinx but as Vi herself said: “my sister is gone”. the last person she had was Caitlyn, and she left, and Vi now feels like she ruined everything again, because that’s how she is, she burdens herself with the guilt and blames herself. So when you see Vi just, on her knees, crying, it’s just so devastating when you think that she is like that because her life is essentially over. All there’s left to her is cry. Just like Powder in the end of s1e3, s2e3 Vi lost everyone.

But that’s when the parallel ends, because it’s when Powder was in that desperate state that silco came, and even though his character divides opinions, you can’t deny that he took care of and loved Powder (who became Jinx).

Vi doesn’t have anyone to come and save her, to wipe away her tears like she had done so many times before for Caitlyn and before that for Powder. She is alone.

thank you to whoever read this entire thing for contributing to my arcane obsession, and shoutout to my amazing friend who helped me put this together @crzytoogetherr 🥰🥰

[starryblueeyesandstarryblueskies]

I have never understood this. I took my best friend to ikea because she didn’t have a car and we spent hours there and then I packed her furniture in my car and drove her home. I also helped her move out of her house at the end of the school year. I also woke up at 5 am to drive her an hour to lax during the worst of Covid because I knew she wouldn’t feel comfortable in an Uber. And I was happy to do it all. Because I love her. She’s my friend and I want to do things to make her life better. She has done countless out of her way kind things for me as well. Because she loves me and I’m her friend.

[stwrrybwrry]

Thinking of when you and gumi get into a fight... 💭

⊹　 ︶︶　 𖹭᪲　 ︶︶　 ⊹

Bf megumi! Who had been slipping further away each day, his gaze colder, more withdrawn, like he’d buried himself in shadows. Every time you tried to offer comfort or a gentle touch, he seemed to resent it. He acted as though your presence was a burden, something weighing him down rather than helping. You started to wonder if he even cared about what you were trying to do for him, you wondered if he even cared about you anymore.

Bf megumi! Who one night, after another icy silence, you found the courage to ask, “Megumi, what’s wrong? Why won’t you just talk to me?” He stopped, barely even glancing your way, his tone biting. “Why do you keep asking?” he shot back, anger creeping into his voice. “Do you really think you’re helping? Just stop—stop acting like you know anything about what I’m going through.”

Bf megumi! Who’s words stunned you, but you pushed back, telling him you were trying to understand because you cared about him. He scoffed, a bitter laugh escaping his lips. “Care? You care because it makes you feel better. It’s like you need to feel important, like you’re actually helping. But the truth is, you’re just in the way.” The words hit like a slap, tearing down every effort you’d made, making you feel small and out of place in his life.

Bf Megumi! Who you looked at him, trying to hold back the pain, but he only grew colder. “Honestly, it’d be better if you just stayed out of my life,” he muttered, his voice harsh and unrelenting. “All you’re doing is making things worse. I don’t need you hovering around like you’re some savior. You’re only making this harder for me.” His words cut deeper than any blade, and you couldn’t help but feel your heart splinter under the weight of his indifference.

Bf Megumi! Who just when you thought he’d said it all, he looked you straight in the eye, his gaze empty and unfeeling. “You don’t belong here—you don’t understand anything about this world. You’re just… useless to me.” His voice was a final blow, shattering whatever pieces of your heart you had left. You swallowed back tears, giving him one last look before you turned and walked away, leaving him behind in the shadows he seemed to crave.

Bf Megumi! Who’s months passed, and as his anger dissolved, guilt took its place. Megumi couldn’t shake the image of your face, the pain in your eyes as his words had ripped through you. The silence he’d wanted so badly now felt suffocating, the emptiness left by your absence a constant reminder of what he’d destroyed. He didn’t understand why he said those things to you. He loved you dearly, is what he thought.

So imagine Megumi when he finally sees you from afar, a lighter smile on your face as you talk with someone else, a friend or perhaps something more. His chest tightens as he realizes you might be moving on, leaving behind the hurt he caused. For a brief moment, your eyes meet, but there’s only a fleeting recognition before you turn away, leaving him in a silence that now feels like punishment. He watches as you disappear into the crowd, haunted by the memory of all the things he said, and the reality that he may never get the chance to make it right. Because at the end of the day, he can only stand there, the bitter truth settled in—his cruel words had not just pushed you away, but had severed the fragile thread that held your hearts together, leaving him to drown in the unbearable silence of what could have been him and you, together forever.

≿————-　ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🌷་༘࿐　————-≾

[athena5898]

I often think when people hear "infantilizing a group of people", they think of it literarily that we are actively being made a infant. While this is a part of it, I think people miss the subtle things that end up causing chasms in their relationships with that group of people.

It's actually hard to pinpoint because it's never a singular event, it's many tiny things but the end result is always "I am the authority, I will always know more then you, I will never take your advice, I will never be honest with you (you know to spare *your* feelings), any disagreement is your fault, any problem in your life is my cross to bear and you must follow how I tell you to fix it, I will never stoop myself to understanding what your needs are as X group and will view everything from my own lens and judge you accordingly, we are not equals, and we never will be. (This is not a exhausted list, nor will everyone have all the same traits)

It is very hard to connect with someone who just automatically assumes a higher status to you just because of something you can't change. All the while the offender thinks what they are doing is actually a good thing. They are somehow helping you by just assuming they are better then you (which in the end, that's kinda what this is).

I have a few people in my life that I care for a lot, but they are not that much older then me yet they act like I can't possibly understand them and automatically shove this "child" label on my forhead.

And here is the thing, they will voluntarily bring up why they think this if you pay attention. It might be trauma they've dealt with, it might be that they have kids and you don't, age, or anything else like this. However I think it's important to note that I have friends who do not talk down to me and respect me as my own person with autonomy and also have these things going on in their life. So it's not like it's impossible to treat someone with respect and have these differences.

Now what do some of these subtle differences look like? There are many ways they can materialize but to name a few.

- Demanding the person solves a problem their way despite the person telling them why their circumstances do not allow that.

- assuming...well anything and all the time. These people have a tendency to think they know exactly what you are feeling and other such things and if you try to correct them then they will actually get upset at you or show some type of passive aggressiveness.

-Speaking on your behalf without asking permission

-never valuing your expertise on any subject. They are older/more mature then you, therefore to them they know more about everything. What's really fun (/s) about this is when they will explain to you, why you are wrong, by repeating what you said back at you.

- any reason why you can't do a thing, or why you need an aide is an excuse. You could do it if you *really* wanted to, but you are just being lazy. Now the real adult has to take up your burden.

- they do not/cannot listen to you. No matter what you say or how you say it, or if they even confirm what you say, there is always a part of them that is not listening. Or hell, they could of listened to you, but since what you say isn't important to them, they will quickly forget it and may even try and claim you never said anything to them.

- I'm not sure if this counts as infantilizing, but I notice that it happens a lot in tandem. While they think less of you and treat you like a child whose facts and opinions don't matter, all of this will change at a moment's notice when they need something from you...oddly enough something they probably normally do not take seriously from you on a normal day. Suddenly thrusting you with this burden of taking care of them even though they are never there for you in any meaningful actually helpful way most of the time. Like you will literally be demanded to stop what you are doing, and get over whatever you are going through to help them and their problem. I cannot explain how frustrating it is to be demanded to be the mature one while most of the time being denied respect.

I could go on, but honestly if I sat here and thought of every single tiny thing they do to make sure there is distance between you and them up on their self made pedestals, I'd be here all day.

The worst part on all of this is that I have no idea how to resolve it. People who do this are not inherently bad people, hell they might not even realize they do it. But this can actually make it more difficult to bring to their attention. I have tried many ways and many different times to resolve this, but I haven't been successful yet. Anyone who has corrected themselves were people who just had a little mess up but still obviously viewed me as a person from the start.

These subtle ways someone can dehumanize you, it can cause terrible rifts and of course the other person never understands why (see point above about not listening)

I am writing this as a autistic person, but I know there are others who go through this. Please check the ways you create artificial authority over someone.

Edit: someone reblogged this with hashtags about how we shouldn't do this to children either and I completely agree, I was using the term because it's the one often used to explain these things. Adding the edit cause I have no idea how to respond to the hashtag thing and I think it's a important thing to note.

[h5eavenly]

Fallen Star┃Jake Sim

Twenty-two - Make it easy. warnings: smut, dirty talk etc (not between reader and jake if that bothers you for whatever reason skip it), mentions of grooming and sexual abuse and lastly angst.

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Heeseung has been a constant in your life for as long as you remember. It wasn’t a specific moment that had stopped you in thought while looking at him but rather akin to a gentle breeze that passes by, almost seemingly unnoticed but the warmth it delivers stays. On the skin of your arm and in the curl of your smile.

You still remember the first time you met as if it was only yesterday, remnants of that night circles throughout your mind every now and then.

You were only a junior, dragged to a party that you surely did not belong to but when you’re that young wasn’t chasing a sense of fitting in is all what was yearned for? However, none of it really mattered. Not when you wobbled your way to the backyard of the house with anger burning fresh in your blood. Almost as sizzling as the alcohol

“Fuck!” you scream once you’re alone, your voice shakes with indignation too deep for you to make sense of “What a fucking cunt.” You mumble to yourself as you reach into the pockets of your ripped up jeans in search of a cigarette only for the pack to come up empty.

With a deep groan you throw it on the ground and step on it multiple times, in futile attempts to release some of the heat off your body, you weren’t sure if it is the hot weather or vexation that had you sweating hence why when your eyes fill with blistering tears you aren’t sure what to blame either.

“Damn girl. Are you okay?” you almost jump in terror, had not expected anyone to be here so when you turn around and come face to face with Heeseung, your cheeks color pink not at anything but the fact that he had witnessed you acting like a crazy person.

“No.” you answer as singular tear rolls down your cheek, a pathetic hiccup follows “My best friend just kissed my now ex.” You aren’t sure why you tell him that even though he didn’t ask perhaps you just needed to get things off your chest, perhaps the few last weeks have been rough at home and now your only joy has been stolen from the tips of your fingers by none other than your best friend.

“What a bitch.” Heeseung replies voice muffled by a cigarette lodged between his lips and your eyes flit down to it instantly.

“Can I have a cig?” you sniffle as your hand fiddles with your bracelet, s cheap gift that was given to you by your ex earlier that night, the metal could turn to rust with how awfully wrong it feels around your wrist.

“Sure,” Heeseung lips curled into a smirk, a puff of smoke tumbling out his lips as he extends his hand out to you “come get it.”

Ultimately you and Heeseung ended up having sex, it didn’t really mean anything. Not to you who has in need of a distraction from the magnitude of your hardships or to Heeseung who was into everything but relationships. So now years later when you’re sharing a cigarette on the balcony of your apartment as you spill the contents of burdens taking place upon your heart. It feels like recollections from that night.

“Sure, I might have worded things wrong, but did I really deserve that?” you ponder after you have just told him everything that went down last time you saw Jake at his place.

“No. he was being a dick.” Heeseung answers. Taking your cigarette from between your lips and you huff in something closer to annoyance.

You don’t find anything to say back so you fall silent, your eyes briefly shifting to the night sky, decorated with dozens of stars. You can’t help but wonder why they don’t sparkle as brightly as you remember, why it feels like a resemblance of the dull vacant corner of your heart.

“yn can I ask you something?” Heeseung asks, titling his head to look at you in time to see you nod “Do you like Jake?” your eyes widen at his question. Had not expected it and your first instinct is to deny.

No of course I don’t. are words that feel suitable to follow and yet they’re lodged in the middle of your throat and in counted seconds you decide that you don’t like that question. Because your eyes are darting everywhere as if stumbling upon an answer could lay in-between your hands or the metal rails.

You think it would have been much easier to deny if the question didn’t come from Heeseung. Perhaps it was his odd ability to look through every nook and cranny of your mind without you voicing it. To unveil your concerns one by one and then – much to your dismay- give echo to your hankering, your doubts. You were absolutely petrified to say it out loud, because saying things out loud gives them power, breathes life into every word and before you know it; it’s an inescapable reality.

“I- I don’t know.” You finally answer, an undeniable honesty fettering every word. Your insecurity nestles its way into you with a familiar route and then it’s all flashing before your shaking heart.

All the times you have asked yourself, “How many girls were here before me?’’ every time Jake’s hands sneaked around your waist with fervor, every time he laughed and then his eyes found yours as if he was checking if you felt the same, as if he wanted to make sure you were dripping with same joy coursing through his being.

And as you were fidgeting with your rattled heart, a part of you knew that you knew. A part of you knew you were running away in fear of rejection.

“Okay.” He says after a few silent beats.

“Why are you asking me that?”

“well-“ he lets out a sigh and your body grows slightly tense, as if he senses it Heeseung inches closer towards you, your shoulders brushing as he keeps his gaze ahead, the cigarette finished and you stare at the ashes “I think you did overstep. That of course doesn’t make anything he said is right or okay.” You listen curled with quiet “But we did talk about this before and this crosses the line of whatever ‘causality’ you guys agreed on. Just because you opened up to him doesn’t mean he should do the same yeah?”

“Yeah,” you breathe out a sigh pulled from the depths of the feelings you refuse to voice “I- okay. Is it wrong for me to want to be closer to him? hoping to know more about him?” your being shakes with the vulnerability of your inclinations, Heeseung’s lips curl up in smile stitched with warmth the weather lacks, tinted with comfort you lean into.

“there’s nothing wrong with that but we don’t do things in hopes for them to be reciprocated do we baby? Especially not in these circumstances where everything is so gray.” His words filtrate through the uneasiness in you so effortlessly, despite the abiding ache you manage to find solace in them.

Silently you close the very small remaining spaces between your bodies and lean your head on his shoulder, his body makes room for you, your proximity welcomed as his arm circles your waist comfortably.

“You’re right.” You whisper and you almost feel the pride flowing through his body, at knowing that your lips twitch upwards. it's knowing when you feel like an outcast in the world Heeseung will always be your home.

“Did you guys talk after what happened?”

“No. he tried but I avoided him.” Heeseung only hums in response, resting his head atop yours.

“I do think you should talk to him. Maybe tell him about how his actions confuse you. because mr nation’s sweetheart have been crossing the line too and what he did was very wrong and assholey of him,”

Your body vibrates with chuckles as you attempt to look up at him as much as you can “Very assholey? Really?”

“I’m trying to be a good friend here.” He retorts with a roll of his eye.

“You have always been a good friend, Hee.” You say with a much lower tone, an unyielding tenderness coats your words, a warmth he silently allows himself to soak in for a couple of minutes.

“What is it that have been bothering you?” you ask after a while and Heeseung feels himself stiffen inwardly.

He contemplates for a bit if he should chase this conversation away, maybe he will convince you to a dawn a couple of drinks instead. A covered-up attempt to avoid looking into the mirror, he’d much prefer to stay curled up through the night than be awake to see the sunrise. But the ineluctable truth is that Heeseung is tired.

“A few weeks ago I slept with this girl and- you-“ his voice comes out croaked as if the silence of his concerns have manifested in the middle of his throat, he clears it “you know how I told you before about hating not feeling in power?”

“Yeah, I remember.” You reply tentatively, words woven with amiability as your gaze flickers over his face.

“that girl was very..persistent. and it reminded me of very awful things to say the least.” His hand moves aimlessly through the air and your brows furrow, a crease of a frown deepens.

“What- what do you mean by persistent Hee?”

“Don’t worry it’s not like she forced me or anything. The whole ordeal just made me uncomfortable and brought back awful things to my mind. so, I guess I haven’t been feeling like myself for a while.” He explains, an awkwardness tints his words as he puffs out a breath, a lackluster chuckle.

“I’m sorry about that stitch. you shouldn’t ever have to feel that way.”

“Yeah.” he replies looking down and stays quiet for a few minutes as your hand moves up and down his clothed arm in tries to provide comfort “no one should feel that way” he repeats.

“Is there anything I could do to help?” you ask, hand dripping to the end of his arm before slipping your fingers through the cracks of his and he grins “how about some ramen and drinks?” the same grin clambers over your face.

After a long and a very unnecessary debate over who should make it, you finally manage to force Heeseung to cook with the excuse “you’re the one who works in a restaurant!” despite the grunt he lets out, he obliges.

You sip on your glass of wine and watch him, teasing remarks thrown his way that have giggles erupting from between your lips with ease and an even funnier sight of a glare remains plastered upon Heeseung’s face. The night unravels with the same geniality spreading across your chest and needed quietude settling onto your mind.

It’s only when there’s a concerning amount of alcohol in your system that you both make the questionable decision of dying Heeseung ‘s hair, after his many complaints of being sick of the purple.

“i’m sure I have a hair dye here somewhere - aha I found it!” you’re standing on the tips of your toes in the middle of your bathroom while Heeseung leans back on your bathtub with a hazy mind, fogged by the number of drinks he dawned. With his arms crossed he watches you in your pajama shorts struggling to reach for the wanted box dye sitting on the top shelf but then you’re huffing with defeat.

He shouldn’t let his eyes wander, but they do anyways.

“I’ll get it for you.” he tells you.

“Thanks-“ he doesn’t give you enough room for his words to settle, for you to move before you feel him against his back. His chest presses you further against the sink and you almost wither away with a hushed gasp.

You aren’t sure if it’s the heat radiating off his body but when he arches his eyebrow at you, his familiar annoying smirk etched onto his face and the dye now between his hands while looking down at you, it ignites a familiar feeling all the way to your core.

“Red? You wanna dye my hair red?”

“And what’s wrong with red?” you counteract, praying the blush seeping into your face somehow isn’t noticeable when you walk past him.

“Now come on. Let’s get to work.” You grin and Heeseung follows with the shake of his head.

The process of dying Heeseung’s hair turns out to be a lot more fun than you expected. It helps take your mind from things you hope not to worry about right now. And despite Heeseung’s malicious attempts at getting dye your nose red (it’s almost deemed successful if not you dodging it in time for the color to splash onto your white couch) you manage to make it to the end of it with the both of you sane enough but not sober enough. It’s two minutes past twelve when you’re finally washing the dye out of his hair. With him sitting shirtless on the floor of your bathroom and leaning on the tub as you angle the shower head correctly.

You’re so focused on getting the color completely out that you’re not paying attention to how far you have leaned over him, with him ending up between your legs and absentmindedly his hands have taken claim on your waist. It only manages to steal your attention when you feel the tips of his fingers sneaking under the thin material of your shirt.

“Hee stop.” You complain with a breathy giggle, attempting to move a bit away from him without getting water everywhere. Your fingers brushing through his strands

“Stop what?” his hands tighten around you, and you squirm with another giggle when his fingers inches upwards, it feels cold against the warmth of your skin and goosebumps take over your body alongside a shiver.

“I’m serious! It tickles.” You berate through broken laughs and his rises alongside yours.

“It’s been a while since you’ve been on top of me like this.” He teases. His lips yearn to curve upwards at the sight of pink seeping into your cheeks and the tips of your ears.

It is more than enough for you to point the shower head at his face, drenching him in water.

“Okay okay! I’m sorry stop!” he tries to cover his face with his palms in hopes to block your makeshift gun.

“I can’t hear you.” you grin and only provide him mercy when it feels like he’s about to choke on said water.

The towel that’s on his head works as a barrier. Albeit a feeble one it is still a barrier. You tell yourself as you’re attempting to dry his hair. Yet there’s a slight tremble in your fingers, rattled breaths escaping you and suddenly you’re too focused on the way your chest falls up and down, you’re too aware of Heeseung’s eyes – stare lingering on your body. So, when he looks up, catches your gaze with a shift in them, a glint that isn’t a stranger to you and one that you are sure manifests in yours just as strong.

You couldn’t pretend to be surprised when he slowly inches upwards and towards you, his eyes darting between yours as if he’s garnering your reaction. He’s giving you time to back out but you’re only pausing in your movement, your breathing grows shaky as if you feel like you wait and wait and wait until his lips finally touch yours. It isn’t gentle- nor slow but rather two bodies clearly hungry for more.

For a split second. A mere blink of an eye, an image of Jake flashes in your head and you wonder if you should stop. It’s a ridiculous thought and you know it because no matter how many roads you’ve crossed, how scarred the tips of your fingers are, how they bleed of trying to knit together your strings of fate – it all comes down to nothing. You and Jake are simply nothing.

And you just wanted to feel something. You wanted for the first time in a while – the first time since Yeonjun and now Jake to feel good. Without stumbling upon hideous feelings like worry or jealousy or unambiguously fighting for the approval of what seems to be unattainable. You have grown weary of tolerating your own heart, bargaining back and forth in hopes of holding on for a little longer. It's the only reason you answer the way you do when Heeseung leans back just enough for him to whisper;

“Are we sure we wanna do this?” your breaths are mingling and you miss the heat of his mouth on yours already.

your body kneels into cravings; more, more, more.

“We both wanna feel good so why the fuck not?”

“Fuck yeah.” His smirk doesn’t last enough before you’re crashing your lips onto his.

It is the sole reason your gasp comes out as audible as his groan. His hands dig into your thighs as he pulls you onto his lap.

The towel falls to the ground silently as his hands roam your body, from your hips up to palming your breasts, there’s roughness dousing his movements, hurriedly traveling everywhere with purpose akin to forgetting and it is the same one that has your arms sneaking around his neck.

“You taste like soy sauce,” Heeseung murmurs, pulling back slightly with a lick to your lower lip.

“You’re the one who put so much fucking soy sauce in my ramen.” you snort, your fingers tugging lightly at the ends of his still damp hair.

“mhm. I’m not complaining. I fucking love soy sauce.”

You don’t get to register what he’s saying before he’s flipping you onto the bed and climbing atop you ardently and then he’s leaning down with intent to capture your lips yet again, his other hand sneaking down to undo the buttons of his jeans. He thinks his head is spinning, he thinks the room is bleeding crimson and he isn’t sure if it’s merely his desire.

“Wait!” you frantically stop him with a hand to his bare chest.

“What?” his brows furrow, eyes fliting down to your lips then back up.

“I don’t want you to stain my sheets.”

“Huh?”

“Your hair. It’s red. It’s gonna stain everything and I just washed my sheets.”

There’s a moment of silence that settles in, his expression falls as he studies you in what seems to be ventures to know if you’re serious – because there’s no way you are – not when he’s rock hard and he’s sure you can feel him, not when you’re sprawled under him with a flushed face and a heaving chest. But your gaze is determined, lips pursed.

“yn,” you blink at him “I don’t give a fuck if I stain your sheets. They’re gonna be ruined either way.”

You open your mouth to argue, you’re annoyed. Probably by his grin that’s doused in pomposity, and he can see it all, but he doesn’t give you a chance to let the words out before he’s crashing his lips onto yours eagerly, messily. You try to fight it, your hand curled onto a fist, and you think you’re pushing at his shoulder with all your power, but it’s all deemed worthless, especially when you’re melting against him. Your lips separating with a moan as his tongue caresses yours.

“You got so much better at kissing.” He comments with a quick wink as his hands pull your shorts and panties down. He licks his lips at the view of your glistening pussy, the room somehow grows hotter, the walls are caving in.

“Well, you’re still bad.” You roll your eyes, your hands pulling your top over your head.

“Do you have any condoms?” he asks pretending he didn’t hear your insult.

“Bottom drawer.”

“Are they Jake’s or Yeonjun’s?”

“Why does it matter?” you raise your brows at him.

“I’m just curious.” He grins, holding up his hands in surrender as he moves from atop of you “I just wanna make sure they fit because you know how massive I am.” You throw a pillow at him and with seemingly godly powers he manages to dodge it with a laugh so loud and deep from his chest that almost has him lying down on the floor.

When he’s on top of you once again it’s clear that both of you are no longer in the mood for stalling or teasing remarks. When your lips meet, desire coats your mouth as much as his. Your brain is turning into mush, not a single coherent thought exists as you feel his hand on your thigh spreading them wider, the other on the base of his cock as he guides it to your entrance.

“Ready?” he taps the tip of his cock against your clit.

“Uh-huh.” You breathe out fervently. Your palms cradling the sides of his face, and you think if you weren’t so horny you’d be making fun of the way he asked.

In spite of desperation clinging to your bodies, Heeseung sinks into you slowly. You’re not sure if he means to make you feel every inch of him or if he just simply likes moving like he has all the time in the world. Whatever it is, it has your head falling back with absolute bliss. A drawn-out moan – that is embarrassingly loud if you focus on it too much – escapes your mouth.

The stretch hurts so good.

Your body relaxes, almost melts onto the sheets as Heeseung starts moving inside of you, every thrust pulls a breathless melody out of you, and it’s met with a groan of his. A wet messy kiss atop your lips. With your eyes lolling back you almost forget who’s the person you’re with. That is until he speaks

“Oh- fucking shit. It feels like I’m diving into an ocean.”

“You’re so gross!” you complain with a whine, pushing at his shoulder.

“What?” he chuckles, resting his palm next to your head as he angles his hips better “You don’t like dirty talk?”

“I- shit” a moan interrupts you, forcing your words to fall apart “I’d prefer you shut your mouth.”

“You don’t like your boys whiny?” a smirk disperses across his lips as he quickens his movement. His forehead glistens with sweat.

“I like them dead and quiet,”

Fortunately for you, Heeseung doesn’t really say anything back to that. Only laughs as his thrusts grow deeper and faster seeming to be focusing on his need to cum and you follow.

“’m gonna cum.” He pants as he keeps pounding into you, grunts tumbles out his lips with every thrust.

Your moans are growing louder and whiner as little encouraging ‘yeah’s’ is all what he lets out till both of you are tipped over the edge of ecstasy. Your orgasm hits you so mind-blowingly hard that even when Heeseung rolls off you with a sigh, your body is still shaking.

“I gotta say,” he starts after a few short whiles of silence, and you hum “that was a pretty good therapy session.” His lips pull into a toothy grin as he gives you a thumbs up.

You roll onto your side with a heartwarming laugh, one that has him genuinely smiling as he watches you with softened eyes. with your messy hair and flushed face and yet you still gleam like the first time he saw you.

“Cured all my problems. 10 out of 10 would definitely recommend.” he adds, and your laugh grows louder in volume but softer in the way you it leaves you, like it flees your being without fight.

“Me too.” You smile at him.

It’s only twenty minutes later when both of you are cleaned up that silence fills the little spaces between you. It isn’t confining in any way, in fact it’s a much rather peace that you welcome as Heeseung rests his back against the headboard. Eyes glued to the screen of the tv as toy story 3 plays and you’re next him chewing on a birthday cake cookie.

“Hey stitch?” you call after finishing your cookie, dusting the crumbs off your fingers.

“Yeah?”

“Earlier when you said that girl reminded you of awful stuff,” you hesitate for a moment, yet it’s gone as fast as it comes “you meant when you were a kid, didn’t you?”

Heeseung does not avert his eyes away from the movie. His expression does not shift, and his few seconds of silence has you slightly faltering. It’s like he knew this question was gonna come up someday, maybe he’s a little more than glad it’s just you and no one else.

“Do you remember that time me and Ryujin were trying to kill a spider but then I got really angry at her?”

“Yeah, she said 'our baby boy is scared' and you snapped at her to never call you that again.” You reply as the memory comes back to you without needed proficiency. It’s solely because Heeseung was never the type to get angry. so moments where he isn’t as controlled are glued to the back of your mind.

On the screen Andy is packing his toys into a trash bag, despite your lack of love for those movies you have watched them so many times thanks to Heeseung that you think if you were to be quizzed, you’d able to recall every single scene easily.

“My teacher used to call me that.” His voice has dropped into a whisper, one that comes from shameful confessions and if you were to lean closer to him you think you’d be able to pick on the broken vulnerability that colors them.

It all clicks in your mind, like loose threads finally connecting into an actual string, pieces of a puzzle that had finally fallen into place. You recall all the times you have played truth and dare and Heeseung has spoken about losing his virginity while he was only twelve years old. The majority of you thought he was just a teenage boy playing games, exaggerating his experiences to appear cooler because when you’re that young what else do you have?

But the longer you’ve known him, the more signs you have noticed. The more you have become aware of the type person he is. The person who would never exaggerate in the favor of a lie. All the times he had warned Niki about teachers. They were all warning signs that he had to endure first.

“I’m sorry, Hee. You don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to.” You say, inching closer to him and resting your head on his shoulder just like earlier tonight. Yet your heart weighs heavy in your chest, sinking with the anguish you know remains in him.

“I had a feeling you already knew anyways,” he replies with a shrug yet his eyes sparkle like the kid you used to know or maybe it was just the light of the tv reflecting into his irises.

Was it slivers of agony or relief at letting loose?

“What makes you think that?”

“Because you’re you,” this time his eyes shift, turning to you and a slight smile tilts his lips upwards “you always notice the small things people do or say and then worry about them in this little head of yours.” He ends it with a harmless poke with his index fingers to your forehead and you push it away with a small giggle.

“Well should I be worrying about you or are you okay?” you softly ask, your words nearly drowned out by the arguing voice of Woody and Buzz.

“I will be.” He asserts.

“You know you can talk to me about anything right? I’m always here for you.” you stare at him incredulously. Despite your thoughts that you don’t voice, mostly directed at how strong you think he is. Heeseung has never seen a gaze as clear, as strengthened as yours.

“Yeah, unfortunately I’m stuck with you.” he teases with a smile and the loud gasp of offence you let out has him cackling.

"I love you, stitch."

"I don't think you should say that after we just fucked."

Your expression drops and you wish to dig your nails into his arms until bleed seeps out but you know even then that won't be enough so instead you march towards the tv and unplug it.

Heeseung's loud scream of pure pain sounds like music to your ears and you can't but laugh like a villain that has finally taken their revenge.

Heeseung has been a constant in your life for as long as you remember and you know he’s always gonna be.

There’s a weakness that coats your flesh, it remains even throughout hallow promises of collecting power during the weekend. You thought the idea of not seeing Jake for a few days would make it easier, yet it remains, remains, remains.

It wraps around your quivering heart that has been screaming for nothing but the tenderness that colors affection. It’s one that runs through the tips of your fingers as you brush your hair. It’s in the longing seeping into your gaze whenever you look into the mirror. in the sparkle stolen from the light as it reflects on the necklace around your neck. 

You don’t understand how it is all possible for this to unfold. How does longing manage to break through your anger, dwindle it into nothing as if it never existed, it shakes your bones from beneath and then you’re staring at your palms with a knot forming in the middle of your throat and the realization comes vigorously fast, akin to a beaten kid coming home from a battle she was too young to face, too naïve to discern the type of conditions she was surrounded with. Too far gone into dreamland and yanked back into reality with no time in your hands to deem yourself ready. Forced to dismantle through your delusions one by one only to finally make peace with the fact that they were nothing more than that.

Delusions.

You are no liar and yet how come you are so good at spilling endless fabrications to your reflection? Because the truth is, no you hadn’t found enough willpower in you to make peace with anything, surely not with the longing leaking across your pillow despite Heesung’s lingering scent.

The sunlight infiltrates through the spaces of your curtains announcing the beginning of a new day and sleep slowly escapes you. Your ceiling stares back at you as you ponder on the thoughts of missing Jake and wondering all the same if he feels like he lost someone important as well?

Your thoughts only seem to upsurge in volume as you go through your morning routine after you stumbled out of your empty bed, no traces of warmth are anywhere to be seen, only an ignominious ache.

It was an odd feeling. To mourn someone that wasn’t yours to begin with. You have had one-sided crushes throughout your life, gone through relationships that left you with scars that felt imprinted upon the surface of your heart enduringly yet despite all your experiences, despite all the tears you shed thinking that nothing is gonna hurt as much as this. It was nowhere near close to what you have felt these past couple of days. Switching from missing to hurt then anger and then nothing.

Distracting your mind from overthinking this is a trying task, forcing yourself not to be a coward because deep down you know every word of counsel that has tumbled out of Heeseung’s mouth is nothing but the truth. You knew you couldn’t keep running in the name of wounded pride covered up by your refusal to accept your feelings.

On your way to work you dwell on which part of you is more embarrassing, which layer of skin you wish you could peel off of you, was it your ceaseless ability to fall for the wrong people or was it the fact that you feel like you’ll forget your own name before your heart stops calling Jake’s name?

For perhaps the worst kind of luck or maybe the luckiest you could ever get (you aren’t very sure yet). You don’t get the chance to talk to Jake in the early hours of the morning. Nothing but the words “Good morning” with a nervous smile was thrown from your way to everyone else before he was pulled into his own cycle of seemingly endless work. Although it had you growing unnerved at first, somewhere along the way you fall into distractions from the fastening beats of your heart and intermingled anxious thoughts as well.

It's only during lunchtime that you stumble into him, for what feels like the first time in a while. You had wandered into one of the dressing rooms, looking for a missing piece of document you had to print out for Jay. And surprise had climbed up your face with speed you are not able to conceal at the sight of Jake slumped down onto one of the couches, his lunch half eaten on the table in front of him.

“Oh-“ you pause with a rattled breath when he looks up, his darkened gaze catches yours enriched with odd power you pretend not to know where it comes from “I was just looking for something Jay asked for-“ you hurriedly explain, as if you had managed to stagger into a space where you weren’t welcome.

But then as if every word lingering at the tip of your tongue withers away, it’s replaced with a tenacious softening in your stare, it darts between the weariness clinging onto his face, the lethargy dragging his eyes down, the weight of the earth drains the color of life from his skin and it is enough reason for tenderness to emanate from the depths of your heart.

“Holy shit.” your words escapes forcefully when your eyes land on his hands. They're badly scarred, with evidence that he had fallen into the habit of over washing them again "are you okay?" you can’t help but exclaim as sincere as you will ever know to be. Your concern only seems to deepen, pulling like tightened knots at the corners of your heart when Jake’s eyebrows drop in closer defeat than anything else.

you bite down on your lip wishing you hadn't lost control over your words.

You are oblivious to how torturous your kindness is. How the way you look at him makes his skin crawl in the worst way possible not because it’s doused in pity but rather genuine worry for his wellbeing. He is so frustrated. At you, for being so loving, so giving and so kind, so you. and then he is more than anything is infuriated with himself, with how he rolls out of bed feeling displaced in his own body, his own skin. He is extremally irritated with the cruelty of his words that echo in his mind like a broken record and then he finds irritation directed at you yet again, he wishes you would treat him just as cruel as everyone else. He wishes you weren’t as forgiving as he had hoped the world would be. He wishes you didn’t look at him as the human he always yearned to be.

He wishes

He wishes

He wishes

“I’m okay,” he clears his throat, his hand runs through the locks of black on his head when your distress only intensifies with unconvinced eyes cutting through him “yn.” he calls and you melt, a stranger overbearing urge to wail clambers over your being and him overtaken with an ache to crumble under your presence just the same, you for finding sentimentality in the cadences of his tone and him, for the way your name tastes foreign with seriousness on his tongue.

“Can we talk? Please.” He finishes, the last word pushed with a clouded whisper.

You hesitate, he thinks he senses it in the way your fingers tighten around the doorknob ever so slightly, yet only you are aware of the hastening beats of your heart, trashing around the walls of your chest and then you let out a breath, seemingly to travel from the depths of your being before you nod.

“Sure. I’ve been meaning to talk to you as well.” Your answer comes with a subtle smile titling your lips upwards.

You close the door behind you with an almost suffocating nerves tinting the air, steps twined with strained nervousness at the thought of being alone with him. Truthfully it hasn’t been that long and yet you somehow feel like it’s been decades since the last time you had his arms around you, since his lips touched yours.

“Should I start or you?” he asks when you’re sitting in front of him, your eyes dance around each other as if you had finally found time to drink each other in, as if this was the last time you’ll ever have the chance to.

“You, first.” you reply after a stretching silence.

And then it stretches a tad bit longer when Jake looks down at his intertwined fingers, seeming to collect his thoughts into words with enough meaning away from your clear gaze. He deems himself underserving of being looked at with anything other than disdain.

“I- I’m not sure how to begin but-“ he stammers, his words staggered as if lost in direction and your mind flees with the same lack of direction simply because you had never seen him this unsure – this unknowing “I know last time we talked I’ve said some really fucked up shit- that you definitely did not deserve to hear.” He looks up, his gaze unwavering compared to his trembling words “I just- I don’t know I guess I was deflecting or running away. But the point is I’m sorry.”

His sincerity renders you mute for a few counted seconds, it’s as fleeting as your hurt, your anger. As fleeting as the cracks that had formed on the surface where affection beats.

“You really hurt my feelings, Jake. It was especially hurtful because I had opened up to you and it felt like you used that against me.” you speak after a while, a bite to your lower lips as your gaze travels across his face and you watch, with devoted attention to the way his eyebrows furrow and an almost sunken expression takes over his face.

“Fuck. bunny I know.” He hisses as if the fact that pain found place in you because of him hurts him just the same “I’m really fucking sorry. I wish I could take it all back.” He continues and you chew on the insides of your cheek, seemingly unsure of what to say.

“If it means anything I want you to know none of the words I said were anything close to the truth. Niki is really lucky to have you. and I – holy fuck I think you’re such a good sister – you’re a good person and anyone to be lucky enough to have a drop of your generosity should be endlessly thankful.”

“Do you mean that?” you ask, cheeks coloring pink and your lips twitching skywards.

“I do.” He answers with a sigh.

“Okay.” your smile stretches against your will, your eyes tentatively catching his and there’s a shift in the air as his shoulders drop in something akin to relief, you’re not sure if it’s at the sight of your smile or the forgiveness that disperses across your being with no intentions to hide.

“You forgive me?” he asks, softly and weirdly vulnerable. It feels ill-fitted, yet it pulls at your heartstrings effortlessly, has your mind wandering into a hole of memories, trying and failing to pinpoint when did exactly Jake have this strong of an effect on you as your eyes loll anywhere else.

“I would be lying If I said I won’t feel a pang of hurt every time your words come back to me.” you start, your thumb and forefinger toy with your bunny necklace in what seems to be a growing habit of yours “but I know you’re being sincere right now and I appreciate that. It’s just gonna take me a while to forget.” you smile faintly, hoping to ease the bitterness that follows your words.

A deeper part of your essence knows that you have already made enough room for Jake to take pieces upon pieces of your soul, it knows that the only reason hurt would ever unfurl into your heart, it is solely out of self-doubted pity at yourself, saturated with questions upon questions that you cannot find an answer to. Simply because there’s no right for you to question him.

Did you also feel like you lost someone important?

“That’s fair.” He replies and unlike you his eyes stay glued to yours, reminders of how paradoxical you are to him, how your gaze abides with a gleam that lights up his insides, a darkened corner that shall never be illuminated by anything other than you, your existence almost helps him forget he came from poison.

It's too much for him to bear, perhaps it’s why his tendency to flee comes to life mostly around you, perhaps it’s why he would never show, perhaps because the bigger remnant of him would never allow it.

“You said you wanted to talk to me as well?” he questions when you finally catch his gaze, falling into a familiarly dangerous game that always starts with you praying not to lose.

“Oh yeah,” he had almost forgotten how easily your emotions betray you with displays you cannot hide, and now he can’t look away from the tint of pink settling upon your cheeks “I’m also sorry about pressuring you. I just thought we were growing...” your fingers sheepishly trail to your necklace once again, the dullness in his soul slowly dissipates the longer he watches you cradling what feels like a fragment of him.

For a scarce moment, a transient second where his self-control falters, he wonders if you feel the same way.

“Closer.” You finish with a smile tinged with nervousness, cutting through his moment vastly enough to compose himself.

“We were.” He exhales, a deep breath that feels stolen from the depths of your chest “I’m just an idiot so do not ever apologize to me.”

There’s a brief silence that settles upon the two of you, it’s woven with a mountain of unspoken words, it’s in the way your gaze softens so marginally and the way conflicting emotions seeps into his. Albeit not much time has passed at all, with the knowledge of your own feelings you feel more wavering than ever, easily swayed by every syllable.

Now that you’ve given a name to plaster onto the truth, you grow scared, a part of you cowers in fear. Were you foolishly drowning in your feelings that you’ll end up suffocating on this growing tension? Or were you just easily far gone, seized with an impotent lack of power? of being unable to feel solid again?

“There’s something else I need to tell you.” you breath out, as if your body is sinking with the heavy tension staining the air.

Jake nods with conformation for you to continue.

“I know we promised we would be honest with each other.” You clear your throat, the seriousness dousing your voice has him regaining focus “So...” you’re toying with your fingers, pads brushing upon your own knuckles and somehow, you’re unsure why you’re growing to be this nervous to spill the past events that has taken place.

“What is it? You can tell me.” he encourages, the softness inundating his voice feels unjust it almost has you curling onto yourself, hoping to shrink in size just so you won’t be witnessed by him.

Were his eyes always this sharp like he had the potency to peer into your inside?

“I had sex with Heeseung.” you bunglingly confess, and with curiosity filling your being, you gauge his reaction as your eyes dart everywhere upon his face.

You don’t know what exactly you were expecting to see but what ends up being reality isn’t very far from the image you dreamt of in your head on the way to work. Jake is stoic, compared to you, his eyes reveal nothing, the few parcels of softness emanating from him mere minutes ago are washed by what seems to be a silence tinged with confusion.

“Heeseung your friend that you always talk about?” you nod and something closer to surprise travels up his face vastly, in the raise of his brows you find yourself tilting your head slightly “The toy story guy?” he asks again with evident disbelief coating every word.

“Yeah, him.” You trail off slowly, your own brows furrowing when Jake opens and closes his mouth a couple of times as if he isn’t sure of what to say.

“Why?”

“What do you mean why?” you ask, a deeper frown of dubiety settling onto your forehead.

“I thought you guys were just friends.”

“We are.”

“I’m just a bit confused about your dynamic.”

“I thought you didn’t care who I fuck.” You don’t know why you’re growing frustrated; it trickles its way into you unexpectedly, maybe because this type of reaction was the only option you hadn’t thought about, or maybe it’s because your limbs feel heavier with what feels like judgment and it’s the sole reason why your words came out like a snap. Sharpened enough for Jake’s eyes to widen slightly.

“Of course you are free to do whatever you want.” His words come out easily, draped with certainty that pushes you further and further into frustration.

You tell yourself it’s not because it’s the opposite of how you feel.

“Then why do I need a reason?” you need to stop.

“Maybe I was just tired of feeling like shit after sex,” stop, stop, stop

“And Heeseung doesn’t make me feel that way. In fact I felt really good after.” It’s too late for you to stop anything, not when your words – like splashed blood- percolates through his gaze.

“Right.” He mumbles – barely audible and yet you catch it with your tightened chest.

You sink your top teeth into your bottom lip with something akin to regret for spilling the truth in a time when it wasn’t meant to be revealed. This wasn’t how things were supposed to go, and the ugliness of your hurt shouldn’t be this visible, not when you had finally been able to exchange a few words with him.

“Anyway.” You say with an attempt to get out of whatever this was “I know being clean is important to you. so, I did get tested, and I told Heeseung to do the same,” you speak when nothing more escapes his lips, you try not to let your disappointment manifest but the shake in your fingers as you rummage through your bag for the piece of evidence could ever be telling “He didn’t send me his results yet but- “

“It’s fine. You don’t have to do any of that” Jake’s voice cuts through the air.

“What?” you pause, looking up at him.

“I’ve been thinking about everything,” his eyes flit to the table momentarily before stumbling upon your stare once again and your ribcage tightens even more around your heart “I think it’s best if we stop this whole thing.”

“Oh.” This time it is you who sinks into silence, your eyes falling upon your lap with the same loss of hopefulness, another futile try to not be witnessed.

It is all a façade you put on, draped with concealed disenchantment at yourself for wanting him so badly and then at him for not wanting you the same way. However, your mind is plagued with thoughts threatening to increase in volume. Louder and louder maybe that wasn’t the full story, it never is. Did you perhaps ruin another thing yet again? Have you spoken too much? Have you crossed the line? Have you-

“This whole thing between us- feels like it has strayed away from what it was originally meant to be.”

You don’t realize you have been staring at your open palms as if you’re looking for what type of blame to throw upon yourself until he speaks, his tone is as soft as you remember it to be. Similar to the way he speaks on gray skied mornings or starry nights. You look up, unaware of what kind of expression you’re wearing yet the lack of emotions etched onto his brings you some kind of relief. At least you aren’t displaying the nails digging into your fragile heart.

“You’re right.” You say, more like a hushed revolution between the ache in your chest and the hollowness taking place in your stomach.

It shouldn’t come to you as a new discovery, yet it does, like a bucket of unanticipated cold water after soaking under the warmth of the sun for too long. There’s no way for you to be the reason behind anything because Jake never cared about you that way. It’s not like this relationship that isn’t even anything closer to an actual relationship were meant to last a long time either way. It was you who stumbled; it was you who was colored with ugly yearning, yearning, yearning… and it was you who got hurt over and over again. And it was you who was willing to go back despite it all.

What a fool.

The words you wanna say are scattered and endless, doused with vines of inexplicable unsightly emotions. your vocal cords itching to pour out your anger, bear your bruised heart out at him with screams to look at what pining for you have made of me!

“it’s not anything personal. I just feel like I keep hurt-“

“It’s fine,” you cut him off with a strained chuckle “you don’t need to give me excuses.”

“They’re not excuses, bunny. I truly-“

“Seriously Jake it’s okay.” You look up at him and his mouth falls shut with inexplicable emotions of his own, you could only hope your irises don’t shake under the weight of your unspoken truth “It’s not like this was meant to last anyways. We both had our fun and now it’s over. It’s not that deep.” Your smile comes up twirled with coldness he had never seen in you, it waters his self-hatred, embraces it with whispers of I told you so.

“Yeah.” he utters, weighted down and the room darkens with you two existing in the same space.

So much time has passed, so many tears have descended your cheeks with scalding realizations. Perhaps you are a liar, perhaps you have driven yourself into insanity and have surrounded yourself with imaginations that are nowhere near reality. Because there’s no way whatever has traverses between you is anything close to the truth, not when your chest keeps tightening and an awful ache to weep clambers over your being.

Perhaps it was all in your mind.

“Well! I better get back to work.” You speak with faux cheerfulness; with a slight clap of your palms, you stand up with attempts to pull pieces of yourself together, covets to remain strong enough to look at him in the eye, despite the awkwardness that rises in the room, despite the misplaced softness seeping into his gaze.

It’s all unfair and you wish he wouldn’t look at you like he had more to say, you wish he wouldn’t look at you the same way he had tattooed his counterfeit claim on your back before everything fell apart.

How violent it is for him not to look at you like you are as fleeting as you wish to be.

“Jay is probably looking for me.” you add, your eyes slowly travel down to Jake’s intertwined fingers. The aftermath of his own pain marks his pale skin with scars. It remains a tragic sight to behold.

“Yeah, I’m sorry if I have- you know” he clears his throat “kept you long.”

“Yeah.”

Your limbs quiver with demands for you to just leave and yet your heart fights back with pathetically human emotions. It’s the same bit of you that have always pushed you into too far in, constantly. The same bit that had you slipping into Jake in the first place.

How could this ever last when both of you were stringed together with loneliness and blood?

Silently you rummage through your bag for a healing ointment you had bought for him a while back. Your mind keeps screaming at you to just leave, leave, leave! and your heart cries – begs to risk this small gesture of care that will surely break you down, release this small wave of affection that will surely overwhelm you.

“Bunny I’m okay.” Jake speaks when you place the small tube of medicine onto the table, his eyes flickering between it and you.

“You have so many important shoots coming. Photoshop can only go so far.” You reply and he looks away, as if looking at you is unbearable and you wonder why his soul seems to shake the same away yours does.

Come on.

“You should take care of your hands till then.”

Make it easy,

You don’t wait for an answer from him and instead you’re turning away in mere seconds, the space between the door and the couch were sitting on feels incredibly long and you curse yourself at the way your eyes fill with tears before you make an escape. Before you’re far enough from him. But truthfully, no distance on this earth feels enough.

Jake has already stained you, tainted your insides. And now as you lean on the nearest wall as soon as you’re in the hallway, your hands clamped on your mouth to quieten your sobs, your tears fall one followed by another with refusal to cease, you realize you shouldn’t have let yourself waver, you shouldn’t have lied to yourself with lies like slipping is nowhere near as painful as falling, that you had it all together. You shouldn’t have allowed yourself to wander through this overgrown field of affection with whispered lies.

Inside the dressing room, Jake has his face buried in the same palms that had cradled your face countless times but you’re nowhere close enough, not for him to feel you anyway.

Jake abides with a semblance of unamended broken bones, wounds too deep to heal, the marks are everlasting evidence that stays. And you remain a semblance of overflowing forgiveness akin to running water that quenches the thirst of by passers. Yet he is unworthy, so unworthy in ways you would never understand.

Jake is tarnished, scabbed, evil and unforgiven.

You will remain unaware of the harshly stabbed knives into his heart each time he’s faced with the fact that he hurts you, you’re unaware of the abhor that runs alongside his blood for himself, for existing and for persistently bringing misfortune to everyone that breaths the same air as him.

And he remains unaware of the way your body, heart and every atom of your being aches for him.

The world, as big as it is, in this mere moment feels too small for the torment setting on you and him, it’s in the way he flinches when he catches his reflection in the scars on his hands they’re not deep enough, not ugly enough and they don’t hurt enough to punish him, it’s in the way you flinch when your body shakes with fallen tears as your yearning heart weeps, his, rattling with immense agony that feels impossible to fathom. It screams and screams;

Come on

Make it easy,

Say I never mattered.

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[tender-rosiey]

hi hii (　；∀；) since its geto suguru's birthday today (03 february), could i pretty please with a cherry ontop kindly request something about it? can be suggestive or fluffy!!! bonus points if satoru's teasing him all the way through because we love an annoying bestfriend

in bloom — geto suguru x gn!reader

a/n: what’s with me writing hurt/comfort for characters’ bdays—forgive me anon, but I have decided to make him suffer a little first 🙏 and hey I am late again but what’s new 🧍‍♀️

suguru wouldn’t exactly call himself someone who views the world in a poetic way.

he doesn’t concern himself with the meaning of the sun’s particular position behind the clouds today or the darkness of the sky that seems to mesh with the rays of the sunset.

it all seems a little too complicated for his liking.

nature is to be loved, of course, he thinks, but he just isn’t the type to go into details about it.

he just lets out a small hum of appreciation and a thankful sigh about yet another day accompanied with a good weather and a sun that doesn’t burn his skin but warms it just right.

that’s enough he thinks.

but right now? he sure hoped that nature was the topic that occupied his mind instead of the incessant sound of clapping.

it plays on a loop, and when he thinks that it stopped—even for a second—he starts hearing it in the rhythm of anything around him.

he wants to rid himself of all this misery and being sentenced to relive this event in every time of the day. he desperately wants to forget it all, but he halts.

wouldn’t forgetting it disrespect those who have passed? disrespect the tears and blood spilled? disrespect the pain that his best friend had to go through alongside him?

wouldn’t mean that he is treating the friends who died along the way as a burden that he needs to dispose of? but if forgetting is disrespectful then the remembrance is devastative.

what does he do? does he act on it? does he forget it or not? or does he tried to find a solution, a way to rid everyone of this burden—but then he halts yet again. it feels too much. it is too much.

so he does what he thinks is best and he pushes it aside, neither forgetting or remembering it endlessly—as much as he can.

a bit of time passes, summer bursts through the door, and he has never hated it so much.

the sun is scathing to his skin, and the sweat makes him feel disgusting like those in the star plasma group. but the shower is a place that he fear? hates? despises? loathes?

the shower head never failed to let out drops in a rhythm that wickedly mirrored that of the claps of the people in that cult.

he notices the worried glances of his friends—those he sees anyway—and he appreciates those who ask about him when they get the chance to—satoru. still, he feels suffocated, and he keeps wondering just what will set him free from all of this.

in what form will salvation come in?

it came discreetly, that’s what he knows, but he doesn’t know when.

he doesn’t know when he started to seek the sun’s heat more, the darkness’ quietness, or the fields behind his school, especially the fields behind the school. flowers are nice, but what role do they play?

they simply just exist. they do nothing effective to help him with solving his inner turmoil, so why does he sit in the field, gently playing with the petals of an iris?

it’s a lot of questions. he knows. he is also searching for answers.

and salvation? he doesn’t expect it to come in the form of you.

he doesn’t know when you made your way into his heart, and he knows that he started looking forward to your “good morning, geto!” to transform into a “good morning, suguru?”

maybe because he cared about you, but why does he do that? then he remembers some stuff. they’re minor, but they are what he remembers at the moment, and he thinks they’re enough.

he remembers the worried glances of his friends—you—and he appreciates those who ask about him when they get the chance to—you then satoru.

he starts to remember how you followed him and never left him to his thoughts, always considerate of his feelings and asking him to convey what he truly wanted.

like that one time you going to buy meals for everyone. after you asked everyone their preferences, you went to him—leaving him for last and at the time, he remembers feeling a little offended because why?

you asked the same question that you asked to everyone, “what would you like to eat?”

and he replied with his constant at that time, “i am not that hungry, but satoru probably wants something sweet so you can get him kikufuku.”

“I already asked gojo what he wants. what do you want to eat?”

he stills for a moment, and he opens his mouth to speak, but no words come out. you roll your eyes with a smile, ignoring his malfunctioning, and ask him something else, “what’s your favorite food?”

he blinks before murmuring softly, “zaru soba.”

“see? that wasn’t so hard, was it?” you smile and ruffle his before running away yelling, “the best zaru soba is on the way!”

in that moment, he couldn’t help softening his expression and the small smile that appeared.

another thing that he had assumed is that this journey through these thoughts would be a solo one.

last thing he expected was you dragging him out to the roof  of the school before asking him right away, “what’s on your mind?”

he resists. it’s not your burden to shoulder, and, frankly, it’s none of your business, so why should he tell you?

so he doesn’t and replies lightly, “nothing.”

for some reason, when your expression becomes ridden with sympathy and sadness and your hands gently hold his own, he feels something.

your thumb rubs his hand soothingly as you murmur, “it’s okay; you don’t have to say anything just—“ you take a deep breath “—just know that I am here for you, and I am trying to understand—“

“why?”

your eyes travel to his face, and he is barely keeping it together.

“why did she have to go through that? why were they delighted in her deaths?”

you listened to all his questions and thought of answers together. words never stopped flowing from him, and you never stopped indulging him. he remembers that first ray of sun that hit his eyes.

he had been spilling his emotions till sunrise, and you stayed. you weren’t talking to him like he is crazy either. you discussed it through and through.

you stayed, and you were trying to understand.

then he figures out that you frequent the fields behind the school. you tell him that you go there because sometimes you just need a break from everything that surrounds jujutsu and the school itself.

he finds himself agreeing that, yes, sometimes we need a break.

at some point,  he finds himself going there with you. the two of you talked about anything, not just the thoughts that plagued his mind (plagued?). 

satoru bugs him about where he goes after school, but he tells him nothing. he feels that letting the secret of the fields being known by anyone other than you two makes it lose something to him.

gradually, he starts going there before you. while he waits, he finds himself thinking about how the sky is brighter nowadays. maybe it’s the seasons or some kind science stuff that satoru is into.

he laughs off the thought then he begins to see your figure approaching the field, slowly but surely.

he takes in your shocked face then the smile that creeps up your face. suddenly, the sun shone brighter, but a small breeze kept him cool.

that’s when he realized that spring has entered, and the daffodils are finally in bloom.

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[vanesycho]

welcome to stray kids headcanon！| m.list | 1,7k word

stray kids as friends with benefits | who can continue without any feelings? who can't?

방찬 bang chan | he will be completely gentle and protective towards you. he will consider your wishes rather than his own and will make sure you are getting enough pleasure.

It would be hard for him to form a bond with anyone else, so I can see that he will only be with you. even thinking about being with someone else makes him question his loyalty and even if he tried, he wouldn't be able to. for him, this kind of relationship is only between you and him.

I think he will succumb to his feelings, he is an emotional person and it seems like he can't sustain this kind of relationship for long, but he can still stay silent. he may occasionally compliment you during sex, but you can't tell if he really means it. he will try to keep it up as long as he can. If his feelings start to get the better of him, he may decide to end this relationship and distance himself from you.

"I wanted to keep quiet just to be with you, but it's getting harder to carry this burden, y/n. I can't hide my feelings for you anymore."

리노 lee know | he is definitely controlled. he acts as close as he needs to be in a relationship and doesn't cross boundaries. he is someone I think he can handle. he will talk to you outside of this relationship but even in this he knows how to maintain boundaries. If he realizes that you are unknowingly getting close to him he will back away, he doesn't want you to think the wrong things or get carried away. he has no intention of being friends with you, just sex and that is enough for him.

as long as this thing between you continues he won't be with someone else, he just doesn't prefer it. he doesn't need someone else when he already has someone, he doesn't care if you are with someone else, all he cares about is you being there for him when he needs you.

"I see how much you value me, but maybe the best part is that we don't push each other too hard."

창빈 changbin | oh he's definitely falling for you. it'll be hard for him to stop. this kind of relationship is not for him at all, he had no idea why he got into it but now he's paying the price by liking you. changbin is an emotional person, even if he tries not to show it. so the slightest bit of interest you show him will make him think that you have an interest in him in his delusional world.

this will bother him for a while and he'll wonder if he should tell you. if you're with someone else, he'll 'joke' about it.

'It's not fair for you to do this when you're the only one in my life. that's not what we agreed on.'

i still don't think he'll be able to handle it for long, he doesn't want to lose you but the confusion in this relationship is wearing him out.

"i don't want you to misunderstand but i don't think i'm the right person for this. i feel like i'm falling for you more and more every day. maybe it's better if we end this."

현진 hyunjin | It 'might' be easy for him to have a non-emotional and fun relationship. he might invite you on dates outside of that and whine about not being able to win a plushie as if he didn't ruin you last night. It might be normal for people to think you're dating, you deny it every time, but after a while, he might start to wonder. If you're coming to the dates and you're not with anyone else, then why aren't you guys dating? that would solve everything faster.

he feels like it might help it put sex on the back burner for a while and focus on him.

'look, I'm the one who understands you the best, I wouldn't miss me if I were you'

'can you believe jisung said we look like a couple again today? that's weird, but you have to admit that we look good together'

he'll try to confuse you with things like that, well...whether it works or not is up to you of course.

I don't think he'll say that by asking you out on a serious date. more often he will say it out of the blue when you are together on a normal day, petting the dog or shopping at the grocery store.

"how do you feel about dating with me? I am the only person you do these things to and the only thing missing is a ask. I don't think there is any need to complicate things, besides i think we both like each other anyw- look! here is the chocolate you wanted."

한지성 han jisung | jisung is the worst person for this relationship and he still doesn't know how he got into it. for some reason i can see him doing it because he likes you and can't say it and then starting this with you so he can be close to you. or maybe he got nervous because others provoked him and told him he couldn't do it things like this.

because dude, i don't think there's a chance he won't have feelings. this topic will hurt him more emotionally and he might ignore you for a while. he might compliment you every now and then, try to show it somehow. he'll try to make things more than just sex between you. but if he can't show it, he'll eventually give up and say it.

he'll probably blurt out that he loves you during sex.

"i love you, i fucking love you so much. why can't you see that? i want to do these things as your boyfriend from now on."

필릭스 felix | he's complicated. you don't know if he's acting so close because he really loves you or if you're misunderstanding because he's really kind. he can really be the sweetest and best partner you've ever seen and thinks about you in this relationship. if felix doesn't have feelings for you, he can still act close to you. more like a friend you can talk to.

'look, i know what this relationship is but if you really need help, don't hesitate to call me. i want you to know that i care about you beyond that.'

if he does have feelings for you, he can spend some time alone to clear his head, he'll respond to your messages briefly and tell you that he's busy. during this time, he'll gather his thoughts and think it's more appropriate to tell you, he can't continue this knowing that he has feelings for you.

"i think i started to have feelings for you without realizing it. i'm sorry if i ruined everything y/n. but i don't think i can do these things anymore knowing that i love you."

승민 seungmin | this might be easy for him. he knows what not to do before starting a relationship like this and of course he doesn't forget the most important rule 'no emotional attachment'. knowing this and trusting himself, he doesn't think he can form an emotional attachment. if you're really in a difficult situation and don't have anyone to talk to, he'll be there for you but he doesn't see it as appropriate to meet up outside of that.

don't get me wrong, I'm not saying he's not an emotional person but if he's not sure of himself, he won't get involved in such things. he has a side to his life that you don't see and he prefers only those close to him to see him like that.

it's important for him to know what makes you feel good during sex, he wants to do it properly and if you don't like something, he wants you to tell him clearly so he can act accordingly afterwards. talking about such things comes easy to him and he wants you to feel comfortable too. do you want to hold hands during sex? he'll definitely keep that in mind.

"come on, tell me. I can't make you feel good if I don't know what you like. we're both in this together, and I care about what you like. I want my partner to feel good."

양정인 yang jeongin | this is fun for him for a while. the idea of freedom that comes with being young entertains him and he might start this to be like the others in a way. he's someone who doesn't know how to keep boundaries, so he'll invite you out on dates other than that. more fun dates where you hang out as friends and where sex isn't at the forefront.

you can see that he's the same in real life like he's the same in sex, he's hyperactive and never stops, he's not quiet during sex and he likes to tell you how good it feels even if he doesn't moan.

you can still see that he's more cheerful on dates, he might make flirty moves on you without realizing it, he's a total boyfriend material and he likes that idea.

still, this thing he started for fun and to be like the others might end up costing him. he might think like hyunjin, since you do everything together, what's the point of you not dating?

it might be hard for him to figure this out on his own, so i can see that he'll get help from someone. he gets advice from each of them and wants to make the right decision.

he's starting to love you and he doesn't want to lose you, all the time he spent with you so far is precious to him, you are precious to him. that's why he won't hesitate to tell you that he loves you when he's sure.

"this situation was fun but now every moment I spend with you makes me feel like my feelings are moving to another dimension. It's hard for me to continue like this but if you let me...I want to continue as your boyfriend from now on."

[samandcolbyownme]

can you do something where jake’s gf struggles with depression, and he helps her feel better? tysm 🙏🖤

Prompt: Reader is texting their best friend about how insecure they feel and [whoever] oversees.

This is going to be kinda sad, but i promise it’ll get spicy.

Warnings: SMUT18+, strong language, talk of insecurities, reader being upset, Jake comforts reader, unprotected sex, oral (f rec), hair pulling, biting, kissing, scratching, creampie, breeding kink, fluff mixed with filth

Word count: 2.6k | not edited

——

The last few days have been exhausting, mainly because you’ve been acting like everything is fine - when in reality, you felt like you would explode if you looked at yourself in a mirror.

You haven’t taken selfies in weeks.

You’ve denied brand deals because of how ugly your brain is making you feel, but you got scolded for not posting enough so you had to, forcibly? kick it into high gear and that helped matters in absolutely no way.

And - when you’re an influencer who is also dating another influencer, it seems like you’re always on camera in some kind of way.

The last few days, the only time you really got to break down and feel all the sadness you’ve been hiding, is when you can sneak away from Jake’s grasp in the middle of the night and take a shower.

You felt horrible for keeping it from him, but you just felt like it was repetitive and you didn’t want to get on his nerves more than you felt you already do.

But luckily, your best friend, Gwenyth, is there to save the day.

She’s always telling you how much Jake loves you, and you know he does. You knew everything she tells you is true, you just need to get yourself to actually believe it.

—

You came to a party with Jake, it was just a small one, but you still didn’t want to be here.

And that was obvious, as you were sat over by the fireplace, knees to your chest as you gently scratched the head of the random cat that’s curled up at your feet.

Y/n, Jake absolutely adores you. I promise you he won’t get annoyed by you saying something, Gwenyth texts, You have to give yourself a break, you’ve been working non stop these last few weeks and I feel like that’s a big part of your issue.

You sigh, bringing your hand up to text, you’ve had a few drinks so your motions are kind of sluggish, Jake calls me beautiful like it’s my name, G. I love him so much, I just feel like such a burden when I walk up to him and basically fish for compliments.

You take a sip of your drink, going back to petting the cat as you wait for Gwenyth’s text. You’ve been texting for probably the last half hour and most of it consisted on comparing yourself to the other girls who are there at this party.

That ties into why feeling like this, also makes you feel like Jake will leave you for someone prettier, and you just don’t know how to say something like that to him.

You look down, bringing your phone up as her text comes through, Its genuinely affecting you, y/n. You have absolutely no reason to hate yourself, you are gorgeous, trust me. You wouldn’t have Jake if you weren’t sexy as fuck, I mean look at him.

You smirk slightly, shaking your head as you take a sip of your drink. You jump slightly when you see Jake starting to sit down next to you.

You lock your phone quickly and put on a smile as you look up at him, “Hey baby. Whatcha doin’?”

He smiles, “I was actually coming over here to ask you that, actually.” He motions to the cat, “Who’s this?”

You shrug, “I don’t know, he just walked up to me and laid at my feet.”

Jake laughs slightly and you can tell there’s something on his mind. You tilt your head, reaching up to run a hand through his hair, “What’s going on?”

He nods as he moves to stand up, “C’mon.” He holds his hand out and you look down to grab your stuff before moving the cat from your shoes.

You take Jake’s hand and stand up, and as soon as you’re on your feet, his arms are around your waist and you’re pulled into his body.

“Jake?” You whisper, arms moving to wrap around his neck, “Are you okay? What’s-“

His lips cut your words by crashing onto yours. His hands slide up your body and he cups your jaw, fingers laying over your neck and ears, “You are fucking perfect in every single way, you hear me?”

You nod and he kisses your cheek, “I’m taking you home, and I’m going to show you every single thing I love about you and tell you why.”

You squeeze your thighs together, letting out a whimper at his words and he smirks, “Come on.”

“Aren’t we saying bye?” You ask and Jake laughs, “Fuck that. I got more important shit to tend to right now.”

His arm snakes around your waist as he pulls you with him, leading you to his car, “I really like this dress on you.”

Jake bites his lip as he watches you get in, your tits bouncing as you sit down onto the seat. Jake nods, smacking his lips, “Yeah. I love this fucking dress on you.”

You look up at him as he closes the door and you smile, eyes following him as he walks around to the drivers seat, “you are so fucking beautiful.”

You smirk, “You didn’t tell me why you like my dress.”

He taps the steering wheel and gasps, “Fuck, my bad. Alright. Your tits-“ his eyes move down to your chest, “-bounce- I mean.. look so good in it.”

You can feel your cheeks heating up and you shake your head, “Seen my texts with Gwenyth?”

“She’s right you know. I’m actually obsessed with you, like.. I can’t go a day without kissing or even talking to you.” Jake reaches over, pulling you into him, “I promise you, as long as you’re fully in it with me, I’m fully in it with you.”

You can feel your eyes burning, but you hold back the tears, “Of course I am.” You close the space, “Now take me home and love on me.”

He nods, “Anything for you, my girl.”

You smile, Jake was always the key to calming you down, grounding you when you got too worked up about things.

But for some reason, you can’t fight back the tears and as Jake comes to a stop, he looks over at you, “Whoa, hey. Sweetheart. Talk to me.”

He squeezes your hand and you gasp, “I-i am my own biggest hater.”

Jake nods his head, his fingers pressing into the back of your hand as he squeezes your hand harder, “I understand what you mean, baby. I think we’re all our own worst critic in certain ways.”

“I just..” you take a deep breath, wiping your tears away with the back of your free hand, “I just, I feel so bad when I get like this because I don’t want to annoy you-“

“Whoa, whoa.” Jake holds his hand up for a second, “You don’t ever annoy me. So far in our relationship, the two years that we’ve been together, you haven’t annoyed me once.”

You feel a smile creep into your face before you look down, “I think that’s just one of the biggest flaws with dating me.” You look up and out the window.

“What’s that, babe?” Jake glances over at you and you laugh slightly, “I need a lot of reassurance and I also have anxiety about it so I just working myself to where I think you’re going to find someone prettier than me a l-“

Enough was already said.

Jake pulls into the driveway and stops the car.

Perfect timing, right.

“You think there’s some out out there prettier than you?” Jake raises his brows and shakes his head, “Nah, nah. C’mere.”

He wiggles his fingers as he leans in to rest his elbow on the console, his hand lying on your neck before brushing your hair back, “Don’t ever think that. There is no one I would rather be with, okay? I have the most fun with you.”

He rests his forehead against yours, “You..are the absolute love of my life and once we get in here, I’m going to enjoy proving that little voice in your head wrong.”

You can’t help but smile and nod, allowing him to peck your lips one last time before he gets out and quickly moves around to open your door.

It’s not long before you’re inside and he’s kisses along your jaw as he backs you towards the couch. You look up at him as he has you sit down.

Your eyes follow him as he sits next to you, hand stroking the bare skin of your thigh as he leans in to kiss down your neck.

You let out a sigh, moving to place a hand on his chest as he sucks a purple mark into your skin.

Jake’s voice is low, “I love your skin and how soft it is under my lips.”

You slide your hand up, moving it through his hair, “I love you, Jake.” You whimper out, spreading your thighs as you feel his hand slide down between them.

“I love how you are mine. I love how eager you are for me.” He groans against your skin as he slips a finger into your panties and feels how wet he has you, “I love this fucking pussy..”

His lips trail down your neck, “..love how wet you get for me.” He glides a finger up and down your slit slowly, stopping for a second before pushing it in.

“Only you.” You moan out, turn your head to kiss him, “always you.”

Your lips move together in a sloppy, yet heated motion as he adds a second finger, “I love how much you’re mine.”

He curls his fingers upward, drawing out a whine from you and he chuckles slightly, “I always have to tell myself..” he kisses your cheek a few times, fingers still working inside of you, “That you’re mine because I just..”

He groans into your neck, pushing his clothed bulge against your thigh, “You’re fucking insane to me.” He kisses over your collar bone, “The noises you make, fuck. I zone out during videos because I’ll remember how good you looked on top of me the night before.”

“Or even right before you film.” You mumble out, gasping as you feel yourself working towards your peak pleasure.

“Mm.” Jake hums, “Such a naughty girl sometimes.” He glances down at his fingers, “Think you can take a third?”

You start nodding before he even finishes his sentence and all he can do is smirk before leaning in and pressing his lips to your neck, “I love seeing how much you can take.”

You gasp, eyes rolling back as you feel his ring finger slip in against his two others, “Fuck, Jake.” You lift your head, staring down at his fingers sliding in and out of you.

“I fucking love how your pussy squeezes my fingers.” He groans as he ruts his bulge against your thigh again, “It’s even better when my dick is in there, isn’t it?”

You moan loudly, hips rolling forward, “Y-yes. Yes. P-please.”

“Cum for me first.” He crashes his lips onto yours, fingers pushing and pulling you towards what you feel your body craving.

“Keep talking.” You breathe out, walls clenching and unclenching around his fingers as your breathing grows faster.

“Fuck.” Jake groans, “I love everything about you. I love how I’m who knows you. Knows your body..” he bites down on his lip, resting his head against yours, “inside and out.”

You tangle your fingers in his hair, moaning out loudly as your nails dig into the soft surface of the cushion below you, “S-so so close.”

“I love how your face scrunches up with pleasure when I touch you.” Jake continues, “How your moans get all high pitched when you cum.”

Instantly, those high pitched moans are let loose as your orgasm is guided through by his fingers.

Your hand wraps around his wrist and your back arches off the couch, “Fuck, fuck, fuck. Yesyesyes!”

“Do you love it when I make you feel good?” Jake asks lowly as you whimper at the loss of his fingers.

You nod, looking over at him, slightly dazed from your orgasm, “Yes.”

He kisses your forehead before pulling you to lay on the couch. He moves between your legs and smirks, “I love making you feel good.”

You smirk as you watch his hands move to undo his jeans, pushing them down along with his boxers to allow his cock to spring free.

He leans down, one hand above your head on the arm of the couch and his other hooked under your one knee, “I love watching the way your pussy swallows my cock.”

You gasp, looking down just as he slips his cock into you. Your eyes rolling back as you let out a loud gasp, head falling back as he thrusts in deeper.

“You are the only one I want.” Jake whispers in your ear, “You are the only one I need.”

He lets go of your leg and reaches up to turn your head towards him, “I’m yours.”

You gasp quietly as you pull him closer to you. He smirks, his thrusts slow down and he bites his lip, “Say it.. say that I’m yours.”

“You’re mine.” You whisper out and Jake nods, “Fuck yeah. Louder baby, c’mon.”

You tangle your fingers in his hair and look at him, “You’re mine.”

“Always.” He kisses your lips, thrusts picking up to a faster pace that has you squealing beneath him, “That’s it baby.” Jake pants out, “Does that feel good?”

You let out a loud moan, back arching off the couch as you nod, “Yes, yes.” You squeeze his cock with your walls and he groans, “One more time.”

“Cum in me.”

“Yeah? Want me to fill you, huh?” Jake groans lowly in your ear and you melt into him even more, “Yes.” You shine, “Please, please please.”

“Make you a mama.” Jake moans, pushing his cock deeper into you, “A sexy fucking mama. Fuck.”

You moan, coming undone around him once again, “Fuck, please, Jake.” You look up at him, whimpering as you feel his cock twitch, “yes d-daddy.”

“Oh fuck.” Jake groans as he grips your hip, moaning as his cock pumps his cum into you. He looks down at you, smirking as he leans in for a kiss, “I love how you’re just as insane as I am.”

You smirk and shrug, “We’re made for each other.”

Jake’s jaw drops slightly and he nods, “You’re damn right.” He leans in, pressing a kiss to your lips before he stands up to lead you upstairs to clean up.

“I meant everything I said.”

You look up at him, “I know.”

He tilts his head as he sits down on the bed next to you, “Do you? I want you to know that you are who I want to eventually spend the rest of my life with.” He stands up, still not dressed and you shake your head, “Jake, what are you doing?”

“I wasn’t..” Jake says, but pauses as he rummages through his dresser drawers, “Shit.” He bends down to pick up a pair of shorts he threw down and he puts them.

“Jake?” You go to get up but he stops you, “Don’t. You stay right there.”

He leaves the room and you manage to throw on a t shirt and shorts before he comes back and he instantly walks over to you and drops down to know knee, “Why not start the rest of our lives together now?”

You look from the ring between his fingers and to him, “yes.”

“Yes?”

You nod, “Yes!”

“Yes!” Jake yells standing up. He pushes the ring onto your finger and pulls you into him, “Fucking, hell yes.”

——

Thanks for reading! Let me know how you liked it! I love you all so much, thank you for reading!! 🖤

Likes and reblogs are majorly appreciated!

[hxney-lemcn]

Distance Makes the Heart Grow Confused — Twilight Princess! Link x gn! reader

summery: you find your life turning monotonous without your childhood friend around, but when he comes back you find yourself conflicted. thankfully, he has his ways of making you feel better.

tw: mentions of getting hurt (not described tho), hurt/comfort, linked universe.

a/n: ALWEHFDLKGJ I LOVE LINK!!!! Finally wrote for him!!! Words kept getting put down I couldn't stop myself. Also, heavily inspired by @maple-the-awesome's The Chain Meets You, His Partner but also vastly different lol (so go read that too if you haven't).

wc: 3.6k

Master List

Trying to ignore the sweat that dripped down your brow, you continued to watch Talon hack and swing at the dummy that was set just outside of Link’s treehouse. He had left, again, on a dangerous mission that you had little to no information about. Once again left in the dark. So you didn’t think he’d mind if you used his equipment for training. You're being filled with sorrow for multiple reasons, but the main one at the moment was for Talon, who felt the need to learn how to fight to protect the village. A task that  you had failed at. Something that ate at not only you, but Rusl, Colin’s own father. It ate at you for a different reason than Rusl, as not only had you failed at protecting the other children, but you had failed Link, who had set out and brought them back. A task that shouldn’t have fallen onto his shoulders solely, but became his burden to bear as both you and Rusl were too hurt to travel, let alone fight. 

You had cried when he came back (much to your embarrassment). Cried happily that he returned. Then cried solemnly when he had told you about how he not only saved the children of Ordon, but had saved all of Hyrule. Cried for just how quickly he had to grow in the few months of his travels, how he found solace with someone that wasn’t you (you knew that was selfish, but you just couldn’t help it). If the villagers had thought you and Link were close before, they were surprised that you had managed to become closer. You never left his side, always trying to do chores before he had the chance. Link needed time to rest, but you knew he would refuse to…so you had to force him somehow.

That felt like forever ago as he once again found himself placed with an even heavier burden than before. Traveling through different dimensions to kill some sort of shadow beast. You weren’t one hundred percent on the details as Link as rushidly explained that he was leaving and he wasn’t sure for how long. That had been months ago, and you found yourself taking over his role in the village. You were the ranch hand now, as well as the defender since Rusl was needed at home to help take care of his newborn. Which led you to this moment, teaching Talon how to defend himself. He was still young, so he had time to learn of the best stances, strikes, defenses, and more. And even if you weren’t as great as Link when it came to a fight, but you were still pretty darn good, which is why Talon asked you. 

You were brought out of your reverie when Talon let out an excited cheer, jumping up and down as he pointed out the broken pumpkin that once acted as the dummy’s head. With a small smile, you congratulated the young boy, telling him to go take a break and play with the other kids. To your satisfaction he did just that, running off into the village as you let out a sigh. You didn’t mind the kids, in fact, half the village were kids. No, you just weren’t as close to them as Link or Ilia were, but they didn’t seem to mind your awkwardness. Just as you were about to make your own way into the village for your much needed break, you were caught off guard as you were brought into an embrace. Panicking, you went to elbow whoever decided it would be a smart idea to catch you off guard, only to be swung around in a circle. You grasped onto the strong arms that held you by your waist, turning your head only to see your greatest cause of stress for the past few months. 

A mix of emotions washed over you as Link set you down, letting you turn to face him fully. Happy once more to see the man you loved, relieved to see that he was not only alive, but no visible injuries, and a bit annoyed. Annoyed that he just pops back in and acts like nothing had happened, like he hadn’t just left you alone again, like he hadn’t just left for a mission that could’ve left him dead in a world he was unfamiliar with. Where you would’ve never known of his status, if he was alive or dead, left to forever ponder the fate of your childhood friend. In the end, your relief won, staring into his azure eyes that shone with pure adoration and happiness. 

“You’re back already?” You whispered, like if you spoke any louder he’d shatter before you and you’d wake from a dream. He nodded, always one who expressed himself with his actions instead of words. “To stay?” You clarified, and that was when your heart dropped. His smile fell, and his gaze drifted away from you. 

Yet he still refused to let you go, if anything he pulled you in closer as he spoke in a similar hushed whisper, “Came here to restock our supplies.” Before you could ask what he meant by ‘our’, you heard multiple footsteps approach, causing you to pull away from Link much to his dismay. Each time he was pulled away from you he felt like he was missing a part of himself. He almost downright refused to leave you when he came back from saving the forest temple and saw you laying battered and bruised in your bed. Your despondent attitude had caused him great heartache, unable to stay and lift your spirits as he had to clear the twilight from the rest of Hyrule. Instead, he kissed your battered and bruised skin that day hoping that his love and adoration for you would seep through your skin and reach your bruised soul. Instead, it seemed his affection had done the opposite, and as you littered his own face with kisses of your own, he could feel the regret, self hatred, and sadness drenched in each and every peck. You had given him the most soul crushing look as he exited your room to continue his journey. He knew at that moment you blame yourself for the children being taken, for not being able to come and help him on his journey.

And just when everything seemed to go back to as normal as life could get, it got uprooted once more. That sorrow filled your eyes once more when he brought up leaving soon. Once more, he longed to stay by your side as your hand cupped his cheek, stating that he shouldn’t have the world rest upon his shoulders again, how it wasn’t fair he couldn’t just live his life like any other hylian. Deep down Link knew you were right, and as he met the Links from the other dimensions, he knew it was unfair that they also had to bear similar burdens. Yet at the same time it was a solace that he met others who were dealt similar hands as him. So when it was time to go back to his dimension, where you would be there to greet him, Link had been overcome with eagerness, wanting to see you once more, talk of his adventures, and give you a few items he deemed you’d enjoy. He completely forgot it wasn’t to stay, and when your loving expression turned sour he felt his heart drop. 

Before he could try to cheer you, the rest of his group had finally caught up, causing you to stare at the multiple blond men who wore green tunics. You blinked rapidly, wondering if you had hit your head to cause such a sight, because it almost seemed like many Links of different variations stood before you. 

“So this was why you were running so fast,” One of them huffed, the only major difference was the scarf he wore around his neck. An awkward air settled around you all, and you found yourself itching for a reason to excuse yourself. You’re sure anyone Link would travel with was nice, but you always had a harder time getting to know new people. 

“Everyone, meet my friend,” Link gestured to you, a warm smile lining his lips once more. Then he introduced you to each individual. Apparently they were all Link, just from their own times/dimensions. It was honestly hard to wrap your head around the whole situation, but they all went by unusual names to clarify who was who. Your Link being called Twilight (or Twi) due to the darkness your land had fallen to years ago. 

“It’s nice to meet you all,” You smiled politely, hoping to not come off as awkward as you felt. “Unfortunately I have to go help Fado with the ranch now.”

“I can–” Before your Link could offer to help, you sent him a sharp glare that quickly shut him up. 

“You need to rest,” You scolded, and as your gaze fell onto the others you clarified. “You all need some rest. You should stay for the night at least, Link—Twi has room in his house to fit you all.”

“But–”

“No buts,” You shook your head, already starting to walk towards the village, the argument ending before it could even begin. You could hear some chuckles from the group, but you paid no regard. 

To clear your mind from everything that just happened moments prior, you found yourself cleaning the goats stalls at Fado’s ranch. Clearing and refilling their food and water troughs, shoveling out their poop, stacking hay bales that will be used the next day, then preparing to herd all the goats back into the barn. A routine you had grown accustomed to in Link's absence. This was his job…had been his job, but it was yours in the meantime. It unsettled you how well the village could do in the absence of Link, how no one dared to utter his name. Or perhaps they thought the topic would upset you…they wouldn’t be wrong in that regard. 

Just as the sun started to set, you closed the doors to the barn, ready to head back to your home and prepare a warm bath to rid yourself of the grim accumulated from a day of hard work. Of course things could never be so easy. Link stood by the gate, watching you close up. As you approached the blond hero, those tumultuous feelings from earlier rose once more, unsure if you could handle any more emotional encounters. 

“Come,” Link waved at you, nodding towards the village. “Wild made dinner.” You planted your feet, ceasing your movements as you felt your eyebrows furrow. On one hand, you felt like you were being unfair to Link's companions, but on the other, you felt completely exhausted both mentally and physically. Waking up before the sun rises and falling asleep long after it sets does one to someone's body. Not to mention the constant work that was piled onto you, from working on the ranch to training Talon, you hadn’t had much time to yourself, and you weren’t sure if that was a good or bad thing. And when Link sensed that you stopped, turning around to face you, you're sure the bags under your eyes, slouched posture, and how you could barely keep your eyes open screamed everything you felt. The bone deep ache that just wouldn’t go away. 

Still, he grabbed your hand. His calloused palm slotted in perfectly with your own. As he pulled you past everyone’s house, stopping in front of his own you almost gave in, too tired to fight back. Instead he quickly went in and came out with two bowls of what you assume is stew. You quickly grabbed the bowls before he could spill them on his climb down. Once more, he grabbed his bowl, then your hand, and pulled you towards the spring.

The crystal water lapped at your feet after you pulled your boots and socks off, curling your toes in the pristine sand. Both you and Link sat in silence as you ate, the starry sky peaking through the trees that swayed with the small breeze. Slowly, you found your body unwinding, each tense muscle coming loose with each small wave of the spring. The stew was good as well, filling your stomach with something other than the basics you had been forcing yourself to eat. You scowled into your bowl when you realized you were feeling better than you had in a long time, and that always seemed to be when Link was by your side. 

Like he could sense your thoughts, he scooted closer to you, arm to arm, nearly thigh to thigh. Lifting your gaze, you were met with his worried one. His eyes searched your face like he was deciphering a language only he could…and in a sense maybe that was true. With a full belly and an exhausted body and mind, your eyes started to droop and you leaned against the blonde next to you. No matter what, he was still Link, still your childhood friend that you grew up with, and you’d always cherish him. 

“I missed you,” He muttered, gently brushing away any hair that managed to fall onto your face.

“I missed you too,” You mumbled back, the warmth of his body inviting you into a peaceful sleep. A comforting silence had fallen over you both, making it harder for your struggle to stay awake.

“I love you,” Was all your mind could barely comprehend before you fell unconscious. 

When you awoke the next morning, you half expected to be by the spring with a sleeping Link by your side. But to your disappointment you were in your room. Of course, being the gentleman he is, he carried you home and even tucked you in. You’d have half the mind to be embarrassed, but this was Link we’re talking about. You both had done and said more embarrassing things around each other than you’d like to admit. And when you opened the curtains you nearly had a heart attack realizing you were late as the sun had already risen a good amount. You shuffled around the room and put on your clothes, trying to ignore the thought that Link had undressed you for your comfort the previous night. Stumbling into your last boot, you ran as fast as you could, ignoring your rumbling stomach in favor of not getting scolded. (Not that Fado would actually scold you, if anything he’d be thanking Ordona for letting you rest a bit). 

Arriving at the ranch, apologies lining your tongue, you felt your mouth drop at the sight of all the Links already at work. The smallest Link, Wind, if you remember correctly, dropped his crate at the sight of you and ran over. You winced, hoping that the crate didn’t contain eggs or glass, but got sidetrack as the young boy smiled brightly at you, asking a ton of questions right out of the gate. 

“Good morning! Did Twi go out with you last night? What did y’all do? He seemed pretty happy when he came back. How did you both meet? Are you both–” Wind was quickly cut off as an older Link approached with a stern look. 

“Wind, you know better than to toss crates around,” Time scolded. “And don’t overwhelm the young one with too many questions. Now go and finish stacking those crates.” With a pout, the kid gave you one last look before dashing back to his previous task, leaving you and the older male alone. Helplessly, you watched all the chores you typically get done ten times faster than you’ve ever seen, feeling unsure what to do without work. Seeming to sense your cluelessness, Time spoke up once more, mentioning that Twilight had stayed behind at his house. And so, you found yourself wandering over, only to pout this time. Link was watching Talon’s new skills with the sword, all the village kids watching them both. 

Beth had spotted you first, shouting your name and waving at you with a giant smile, “Look! Link’s back and he’s gonna spar with Talon!” “Spar?” You repeated as you blinked. Talon was in no way shape or form ready to spar yet, but Link had a sparkle in his eye that only spelled mischief when your gazes met. Talon was jumping up and down, excited to not only see Link again, but to do something you had been holding off on. With a resigned sigh, you only shook your head, letting out a short ‘okay.’ The two got into a fighting stance, and you had to fight the itch to correct Talon’s incorrect posture. Instead, you continued to watch from the sidelines as Link let Talon start with the first strike. The skill difference was obvious, and it was clear that Link was going easy, but in the end, Talon ended up knocked to the ground. And as you expected, Talon complained, waving off his own mistakes and pinning it onto someone or something else. To your surprise, instead of asking for a rematch, Talon ran off with his friends following shortly after. 

Bumping your shoulder slightly, Link drew your attention back to him, a boyish smile resting on his lips. After all this time, all the hardships he went through, he still managed to have a young air around him. You weren’t sure how he did it. You reciprocated the gesture, bumping into his shoulder slightly harder. 

“I don’t know what to do,” You couldn’t help but confess. “All the work is getting done and I feel like I should be doing something.” Link looked up with a hum, tapping his chin in thought for a few seconds. That cunning grin once again settled on his face before he grabbed your hand and sprinted towards the springs. 

“The springs, again?” You asked with a short laugh. “Didn’t we do this last night?” You felt your skin prickle as he sent you a devious look, picking you up like you were nothing and tossing you into the water. Thankfully, he threw you into the deeper part, or else that fall would’ve surely hurt. Wiping the water from your eyes, you sent the man your best glare you could muster, grabbing the front of his tunic and pulling him in further. In retaliation, he sent a wave of water at your face with a chuckle. With a huff, you tried to do the same, but the wave wasn’t as big as you’d like it to have been and you both laughed. You felt the darkness that had enveloped your heart slowly melt away as both you and Link played like you used to when merely children. Something you had missed dearly in the past few years. 

As your playful fight slowed, you couldn’t stop yourself from watching Link, or how the water fell from his hair and dripped back into the spring. The last three words he muttered last night rung back through your head. All the love and adoration you held for him gathered into a pool, ready to spill past your lips, and who were you to fight that? Not you, you thought as you eyed his lovely smile, one you would die for. 

“I love you,” You stated, heart beating wildly as Link turned to face you. At first he looked at you with shock, but that melted into pure warmth and affection as he waded closer. So close that you felt your body warm at the mere thought of his touch, felt your heart quiver in anticipation for his next move, and stomach flutter with all the love you held. 

It was silly. When you were younger, you recalled that you’d pretend to be his spouse and play house. How you stated you’d both get married someday, and how he would always go along with your nonsense. You said all those things with your full chest before, but now saying your true feelings felt like a battle. It made everything more real, and as you grew older you assumed he had never taken your childish ramblings seriously. Yet you seemed to be proven wrong as he gently cupped your face with one hand, the touch sending heat blazing throughout your entire being. As he leaned in closer, you closed your eyes, expecting a kiss…only for him to nuzzle your nose with his own. Yet the disappointment was drowned with the fuzzy butterflies that flew in your stomach at such an intimate act. One so loving and pure. 

Link’s actions screamed volumes louder than any words could as he littered both your cheeks, forehead, nose, chin, or anywhere he could reach with kisses. A bittersweet reminder of the day he came back after twilight had taken over. And just like that day, you reciprocated, this time with a heart full of light and happiness. Instead of ending it there, you pulled him in for a proper kiss, one you had wanted for as long as you could remember. He wasn’t as surprised by your actions as you wished he’d be as he reciprocated without hesitation. You didn’t mind his chapped lips, or the way you both kissed clumsily, because this was Link. Your Link. And you wouldn’t have him any other way.

And once you both pulled away breathless, ignoring how you both still stood in the spring with sopping wet clothes sticking to your skin, you took in the other's presence. The warmth you both offered each other, the happiness, the love, the need and the want. You were like two pieces to a puzzle, a part of you missing with the other gone. And in that moment, everything felt like it clicked into place. He may still need to continue his journey, but you knew that he’d always find his way back to you, just like he’d always know where to find you.

[blushweddinggowns]

It was kinda like an open secret, the fact that they were together. And if Steve was being honest with himself, even that was a stretch.

And it was one hundred percent their fault. Well...mostly it was Eddie's fault. The second they were with whoever he deemed "safe" Eddie would be all over him. Whether it was pet names, casually wrapping an arm around his waist, dragging him to sit on his lap, a kiss to his forehead, Eddie was far from shy when it came to handing out affection.

And if Steve did absolutely nothing to stop him when it happened well...that was Eddie's fault too. What else was Steve supposed to do when the man he loved was so openly sweet and affectionate? Say no? Put a stop to the behavior that made him feel like he was the most important person in Eddie's world? Give up the chaste hugs and kisses that made him feel like he was walking on air?

Yeah, no. It wasn't Steve's fault that Eddie made him feel so good, so the blame could stay laid at his feet.

Yep, totally Eddie's fault, Steve had nothing to do with it.

But there were only so many times you could call your new "best friend" baby before people started asking questions. Robin knew, Wayne knew, Nancy knew, and Steve was pretty sure all of Eddie’s age-appropriate friends were well aware.

And the kids would figure it out when they figured it out. It's not that they didn't trust them to accept their relationship, it was more that they would be too accepting. And way too involved. And Steve wanted to bask in the honeymoon period before all of his little shits started giving unprompted advice on his love life, and Eddie felt the same way.

So they lied, but only a little. Or more that Steve lied. Whenever it was a Steve and Eddie date night exclusive and the kids were vying for attention or rides, he'd tell them was hanging out with Robin or working late. But Eddie would just smile and shake his head to any asks, always with a painfully sincere, "Can't tonight, I got a date with my sweetheart."

His sweetheart who, none of the kids could meet until, in his words, he officially locked it down, the silly little speech never failing in making Steve blush and smile like an idiot. It was always enough to make the kids back off, and for the moment, their little plan seemed to be working.

But Steve wasn't sure how long it would stay that way, not when Eddie was very suddenly elected as the go-to for advice on the kids' love lives.

Which ow. Steve had experience with relationships, maybe not good experiences until very recently, but he had them! But the kids bypassed him every time in favor of the "one" adult in their lives who actually was seeing someone. And Steve didn't have the heart to break it to them that he was the only one their new love genius had ever been with.

Lucas had started it, faux casual at a Hellfire meetup, with Steve lazily reading magazines in the corner while he waited for his nerd boyfriend to be done so their night could actually begin.

"Hey Eddie, you've been seeing your girlfriend for a while right?"

Eddie nodded, "We're closing in at six months, why?"

Lucas rubbed a hand over the back of his neck, embarrassed, "Well...what would you do if say, you know they love you, and you love them, but they never let you help them with anything? Like...they always act like they're a burden when they're really just the best?"

Steve perked up at the question. silently watching as Eddie considered it.

He nodded along, thoughtful, “I was with someone like that once, always thinking about everyone else but never themselves. I guess you kinda just have to love it out of them y'know? Like give them the space they ask for sure, but let them know that you're always there for them. Not because you have to but because you want to.” 

Eddie took a chance and glanced at Steve while he spoke, giving him the quickest wink known to mankind. Steve hid behind his magazine, ears red with a stupid, lovestruck smile as Lucas thanked him.

Then it was Dustin. He sprung it on them while Steve was driving him over to the Wheeler's place, Eddie flipping through radio stations while Dustin was prattling to them in the backseat, "So I was trying to explain it to her, and she totally flipped out and hung up! She said that I think I'm smarter than her, which is totally untrue! Suzie is the smartest person I know!"

Steve snorted, "I told you you could be condescending-"

Dustin glared at him, waving him away, "I'm asking Eddie thank you very much! "I just thought she knew that I know she's smarter than me. So what should I do?"

Eddie shrugged, "I was with someone like that once, super, super smart but they could never acknowledge it in the way I thought they should. For them though, it was because people always talked down to them and never made the effort to see how they were smart. There are a lot of different kinds of intelligence out there right? So just let her know that there are some things you're better at but you know that for most things she's the gold star child."

Eddie glanced back at Dustin, rolling his eyes when he realized the kid was actually taking notes, but it gave him a chance to stealthily grab Steve's hand and squeeze it with a wide grin, "It isn't fair, but rarely does the smartest person in a room, know that it's them."

And if Steve couldn't help but kiss the daylights out of him while they were still in the Wheeler's driveway after that little speech, he stood that it was still Eddie's fault for being so sweet.

The kids kept coming to Eddie for advice, mostly because it usually worked. Some of it Steve was there for and some of it he wasn't, but it never stopped embarrassing the living hell out of him to hear himself be talked about so positively and sweetly, especially if it came out of the mouths of one of the kid's, unknowingly repeating stories and advice centered around Steve.

It was Will who finally cracked it, because who else? They were all at the Harrington place, taking full advantage of the absentee parents and pool during a hot summer day. Wil found the two of them in the kitchen, in the middle of a stupid debate over the best action movie of the year, sharing a popsicle back and forth while they play-fought.

He looked nervous as he walked up to them, looking anywhere but at their faces, "Hey Eddie, do you mind if I ask you something?"

Eddie nodded, snatching the last of the popsicle from Steve's hand, ignoring his whining, "Sure dude, what's up?"

"Have you ever, um, liked someone who you thought didn't like you back? But then they started...acting different?"

Eddie cocked his head at him, "Elaborate."

"Like...just treating you differently. More touchy-feely and attentive maybe? Do you think...that means anything? Has that ever happened to you?"

Steve glanced out the kitchen window, eyes on Mike as he sat at the edge of the pool, legs dangling over the side while his head was on a swivel, no doubt looking for Will.

It didn't take a genius to guess who he was talking about.

Eddie shrugged, "Not exactly? But I have gone after someone majorly out of my league before. And that worked out. I'd say just be straight forward and confident. Ask if they're interested, or if you can't do that ask them how'd they feel if you got with someone else. That can sometimes get the ball rolling if they're being too tight-lipped about their feelings."

Will nodded along, "So is that how you got Steve?"

Steve froze while Eddie laughed, not even catching on to the slip, "I got Steve by crying to his loose-lipped best friend about how in love with him I was. Not the best example."

And of course, that was the moment Dustin decided to walk in the room.

Steve brought a hand to his mouth, laughing behind it as Dustin froze, staring wide-eyed at Eddie, "You're with Steve?!"

Eddie whipped around to face him, but Dustin was already staring at Steve, "So the someone like that, has been you this whole time?!"

Steve was still laughing behind his hand as Dustin skittered out, no doubt to announce to the whole backyard just where their great love advice had been coming from.

Will followed him, winking at them over his shoulder as he went. Eddie was still standing there, confused on how one of the munchkins just bamboozled him into telling the longest kept secret he ever had.

Steve clapped a hand on his shoulder, just as voices started to raise from the background, coupled with a few yells around someone owing Will money, "Guess the secret's out huh?"

Eddie turned to face him with a sigh, smacking a kiss to his forehead, "You realize this means you're going to have to help with the love advice now right?"

Steve groaned, "I thought my existence was the help."

"Nope, it's your turn to give the love advice about me from now on."

Steve laughed, leaning in to kiss him chastely on the mouth. They grinned at each other, enjoying their last moments of peace before the whole gaggle of kids made they're way into the room, armed with questions and accusations galore.

But that was okay, Steve was more than ready for it to be his turn.

[talaok]

His favorite patient

Pairing: Pedro Pascal x reader

Summary: Your friend Pedro takes care of you while you're sick, and he's such a good doctor, that something sparks between the two of you.

warnings: reader being sick and having a fever (?) and my shitty writing cause im tired

(this was a request, and a very beautiful one too)

All you had done was text him that you were sick, and the next thing you knew, he was knocking at your door. 

And that wasn't even the weirdest part, the weirdest part was that you weren't surprised, because that's how Pedro was, caring, protective, and always there for you, no matter what.

The first thing he'd done as you opened the door was scolding you for even being up, and consequently, the second was ushering you to your own couch and forcing you to sit down.

You laughed the whole time at how worried he was, but then again, your genuine gratitude shined through with his every act, a gentle smile and a "thank you" spilled out of your lips the moment he made you tea, or wrapped you up in a blanket, or pulled you into his chest when the cover stopped being enough.

You remained like that, hiding in his arm while watching tv for the whole afternoon, but unfortunately, after he'd made you some soup (which you had tried convincing you could cook on your own) and ate it with you, it was time for him to go. 

So with a heavy heart and a final hug, he was gone... only to return 2 minutes later.

"Missed me already?" you joked, opening the door again

"Always" he smiled, before getting more serious "I have a problem with my car" he explained "It's not turning on, and I-" he scratched the back of his neck, trailing off "I kind of have no way of getting home"

"oh" you breathed, understanding the situation "You can just stay here" You shrugged, the solution obvious in your eyes

"Are you sure? I don't wanna be a burden or anythin-"

"a burden?" you frowned, stunned "What are you talking about Pedro, you could never be a burden" you promised, inviting him in again "and plus... I feel safer with my own personal doctor here with me" you grinned playfully

"yeah?" he laughed "Well then how could I refuse to help my favorite patient?"

"Favorite?" you gasped, feigning flatter as your right hand went to your heart "You're gonna make me blush doctor"

He snorted at that, his eyes lingering on yours for a second too long.

"Well then, the doctor's ordering bed rest"

You scowled at him, rolling your eyes

"I'm already starting to regret my decision" you muttered, but in no time, you were laid beneath the covers, ready to go to sleep.

"Ok then you're all set, I'll go prep the couch" he said, starting for the door

"what?" you asked

"the couch, I need to-"

You stopped him before he could go on

"You're not sleeping on the couch Pedro" you stated, watching his brows frown "It's uncomfortable as hell" you explained "and there's enough room here for the both of us" Your eyes went to the empty spot beside you

"Oh- no, y/n I can't"

"yes, yes you can" you interrupted him again "And you will" you decided "I'm sick, so that means you have to do whatever I tell you"

"sweetheart..."he sighed, glaring at you

"please" you pouted, "It would make me feel better knowing you're close to me" you pleaded, your best puppy eyes on you.

And what could Pedro do but not agree when you were looking at him like that? He was only a man after all.

"alright" he grumbled, "but I hope you know that means you'll have to hear me snore the whooole night"

But as it turns out, you didn't.

Your fever started going up the moment you shut off the lights, you turned and tossed the whole night, while him... he stayed up with you, checking your fever, giving you medicine and placing wet cold cloths on your forehead, until finally... you started feeling better and began drifting off... if only, of course, those damned church bells hadn't rung.

But even then, Pedro was there, placing his hands on your ears to try and protect you from the noise, and once they stopped, once he had gotten a taste of how good it felt to stay so close to you, well then he didn't have it in him to lean away, so he did the opposite: he put his arm around you and pulled you close, gently whispering "You need to rest", before inevitably, you did as told.

And it was only the morning after that you remembered all of it, it was only once you woke up, his arm still reassuringly around you, his words still reverberating in your ear, that you realized everything.

"good morning" he murmured, his head nestled into your neck

"morning" you smiled, your voice hoarse as you turned around to look at him, finding him but an inch from your face... and yet he didn't lean away.

"thank you" you whispered "for everything"

"darling I'm always gonna be here for you, whatever you need"

You smiled wide, watching his eyes fall to your lips 

"stop it" you murmured

"stop what?" he laughed

"being so nice"

"why?" he asked, smiling

You bit your lip, pondering if saying what you wanted to say really was a good idea... but then again, it was the truth, so...

"'cause you're making me want to kiss you"

"'s that right?" he smirked, inching closer

"mh-mh" 

"and what's stopping you?"

"I don't want you to get sick" you said, watching him huff a laugh

"sweetheart" he shook his head, grinning brightly "I would catch a thousand colds if it meant I got to kiss you"

And although your heart skipped a beat, you couldn't help but laugh out a quick "that's disgusting", before his lips finally met with yours.

[kayewrite]

Like I Do

(i just wanna love you)

genre:; fluff, best friends to lovers. word count: 1864

jeongin x reader. college jeongin!. architect student Jeongin! (writing for him cause university jeongin is what i always dream of *sobs*0

wherein: you tried to stop you feelings for your best friend especially he has a girl.

College is something—

Something you don’t want to do but have to do.

Something hard to do, but you need to do it anyway because your future is in there.

You sigh for the third time as you look at the problem you need to solve for your hydraulics subject. You feel overwhelmed, so you decide to close your book and stand up. "This won’t do. I need caffeine."

You walk to the cafeteria, buy what you need, and sit at the nearest table when someone places a piece of bread in front of you.

"Hello. Miss me?" You sigh, then look at the man who sits across from you.

"I’d rather swim than see you," you joke because you hate swimming.

"Aww, I missed you too." He smiles, then takes your coffee and sips, leaving the cup half empty.

Jeongin has been your best friend since high school. Now in college, where you take different courses, you rarely see each other. He’s studying architecture, and you’re in civil engineering. Neither of you is in your dream course, but you took it anyway.

"How’s life?" he asks after you both rant about that one instructor you share—the one who doesn’t teach well but gives hard quizzes anyway.

"Better until I saw you."

He squints his eyes and rolls them. "I think you’ll see me more often. My girlfriend is in your department."

You stop sipping your drink at his words but then pretend it doesn’t affect you.

You’ve had a long-time crush on this best friend of yours. I mean, who wouldn’t? He’s handsome and cute at the same time. He knows you better than anyone else in this world and is always there for you in hard times. Tell me, who wouldn’t?

But you tried to suppress it when you realized he’s a gentleman to everyone, not just you. He’s like that to anybody, and you’re not that special. Well, you are his best friend, but that doesn’t differ from how he treats his other female friends. He’s just that kind of potato to everybody.

"Who? Why didn’t you tell me?" You put on an upset face.

"Well, you’re busy. Every time I go there, I see you spacing out, so I can’t tell you."

"Well, that explains it." You try to act calm, but honestly, you’re just as hurt as if you were pricked by a tiny splinter that goes deeper into your skin until it swells. It hurts like hell, but you’re afraid to tell anyone—they might say you’re overreacting. It’s just a small wound.

"Are you angry?" Jeongin suddenly feels uneasy. He knows you well.

"Nothing. I’m just tired, but you drank my coffee, you prick."

He laughs in relief. "Don’t worry, I’ll buy you another." Then he stands up. You’re about to say it’s okay, but you feel too weak to do so and let him do what he wants.

He comes back with the same coffee and two cupcakes—your favorites: strawberry and chocolate.

"Here, our future engineer. Keep fighting!" He places them in front of you, cheering you up. You can’t help but smile. You seek comfort from him. You stay there until who knows when, talking and catching up until you run out of things to say.

You return to your study area, feeling like the burden you were carrying is now gone. You pick up your pen and answer your problems quietly.

-

You step out of your classroom, feeling happy. Your long quiz is finally finished. You’re not sure about your answers, but at least it’s done, and now you can rest!

"Ohoy there!"

You look toward the end of the hallway you’re walking down and see Jeongin with a tube slung over his back (probably his plates).

You smiled. "What are you doing here? Aren't you busy?"

"I was busy, but I need to look for my inspiration. Have you seen her?" Jeongin's eyes twinkled as he teased, but you knew he meant his girlfriend. The words made your heart sink, but you played along.

"She's inside taking the exam. You should be quiet and let her take it in peace," you replied, trying to keep your tone light.

Jeongin chuckled, leaning against the wall next to you. "How's the quiz? Did you ace it?"

"Finished, at least. Whether I aced it is a different story," you said with a small laugh. "But I'm just glad it's over."

"That's the spirit!" Jeongin gave you a gentle nudge with his elbow. "How about we celebrate? Let's go to that ramen shop we used to visit in high school. My treat."

The suggestion brought a rush of memories—late-night study sessions, bowls of steaming ramen, and laughter that echoed through the small, cozy shop. It was your place, your little refuge from the world. But now, the idea of going there with him, with her, made you hesitate.

You forced a smile and nodded. "Sure, sounds good."

Later that evening, the three of you sat around a familiar table at the ramen shop. The comforting aroma of broth filled the air, but the atmosphere was different, heavier.

Jeongin's girlfriend sat close to him, her arm looped through his as she leaned in, talking softly. You tried to focus on your ramen, stirring the noodles absentmindedly. Jeongin noticed and, without a word, pushed a small bowl toward you.

"I asked them to leave out the vegetables and tone down the spice," he said, his voice warm with familiarity. "Just how you like it."

"Thanks," you murmured, trying to ignore the way his girlfriend's eyes narrowed at the gesture.

Throughout the meal, she grew increasingly clingy, touching his arm, laughing louder at his jokes, as if marking her territory. You felt smaller with each passing second, the weight of your unspoken feelings pressing down on you.

"I need to go to the restroom," you suddenly announced, standing up before either of them could react. You needed air, needed space away from the suffocating tension.

In the restroom, you stared at your reflection, trying to compose yourself. But the tears came anyway, hot and uncontrollable. It was too much—pretending you were okay, pretending you could just be his friend when every moment with him reminded you of what you couldn't have.

You cried until you couldn't anymore, until the mirror showed a person you barely recognized, someone worn out from hiding too much. Wiping your eyes, you took a deep breath and made a decision. You needed to set boundaries, for your own sake. Jeongin had a girlfriend, and you had to let go of the feelings that were tearing you apart.

The next few days were hard. You avoided Jeongin, making excuses whenever he tried to hang out. You buried yourself in your studies, in anything that could distract you from the ache in your chest. But Jeongin noticed. Of course, he did.

One day, he cornered you outside your classroom, his expression serious. "You've been avoiding me."

You sighed, unable to meet his eyes. "I’ve just been busy, Jeongin. You know how it is."

"Bullshit," he said, his voice unusually sharp. "You’re not just busy. Something’s wrong, and you’re not telling me."

"Why does it matter?" you snapped, finally looking at him. "You have a girlfriend now. Go focus on her."

Jeongin blinked, taken aback by your sudden outburst. "Is that what this is about? You think I don’t care about you just because I’m dating someone?"

You shook your head, tears threatening to spill again. "No, it’s not that. It’s just… I need space, okay? I need to figure things out."

"Figure what out?" His voice softened, and he took a step closer, his hand reaching out to you.

You stepped back, shaking your head again. "I can’t do this, Jeongin. I can’t keep pretending that I’m fine when I’m not."

The silence between you was deafening. He looked at you, his brows furrowed in confusion, and maybe something else. You didn’t wait for him to say anything else. You turned and walked away, leaving him standing there, alone and confused.

Days turned into weeks, and the distance between you and Jeongin grew. You tried to move on, focusing on your studies and pushing your feelings aside. But every time you saw him, your heart ached, a constant reminder of what you’d lost—not just the chance to be with him, but the friendship you had cherished.

Jeongin, on the other hand, became more and more withdrawn. His girlfriend noticed, of course, and their relationship began to strain under the weight of his unresolved feelings. He missed you, more than he thought possible, and the longer he went without seeing you, the more he realized something that terrified him.

He liked you. He always had, but he had been too blind to see it, too caught up in the idea of finding the perfect girl that he overlooked the one who had been there all along. The one who knew him better than anyone, who made him laugh, who made him feel at home.

And now, he was losing you.

It was a rainy afternoon when Jeongin finally found you in the library, your nose buried in a textbook. You didn’t notice him at first, too engrossed in your reading. But when he sat down across from you, you looked up, surprised.

"Jeongin, what are you—"

"I broke up with her," he blurted out, cutting you off. His eyes were intense, filled with a determination that you hadn’t seen before.

You blinked, taken aback. "What? Why?"

"Because she’s not you," he said, his voice quiet but firm. "Because I’ve been looking for something, someone, who was right in front of me the whole time. And I was too stupid to see it."

Your heart pounded in your chest, a mixture of hope and fear swirling inside you. "Jeongin, you don’t know what you’re saying…"

"I do," he insisted, leaning forward. "I know exactly what I’m saying. I like you. I like you so much that it hurts, and I can’t stand the thought of losing you because I was too scared to admit it."

Tears welled up in your eyes, but this time, they were tears of relief, of joy. You had been holding onto this hope for so long, and now, it was finally happening.

"I like you too," you whispered, your voice trembling.

Jeongin smiled, that familiar, boyish smile that you had fallen for all those years ago. "So, what do you say? Should we give this a shot?"

You nodded, unable to speak past the lump in your throat. He reached out, taking your hand in his, and just like that, the distance that had grown between you disappeared. It wasn’t going to be easy, but for the first time in a long time, you felt like everything was going to be okay.

[daisys-reality]

𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐈𝐍𝐆

What's coming next in love matters?

This was a requested reading by one of my followers, I hope you enjoy it. The next pac reading will be reality shifting related again, I promise! If you like to read more pac readings from me, feel free to check out my masterlist! If you want to share your experiences and/or give me feedback and/or share pac ideas, I would be very happy if you send me an ask over tumblr !!! (Also, fyi I don't own any of these beautiful pics, I just edited them!)

pick a picture!

picture one

Hello pile one, you will experience a turning point in your love life. The change may have already started subtly and I heard that they may be apparent in rather random acts but remember all fates are part of an interconnected web of repercussion! You’re asked to embrace the change and to be open to new experiences. It’s a time of death and rebirth so to say. You might experience an unexpected windfall. There is something happening right now you’re not fully aware of … like it’s happening behind the scenes. It’s the end of a life cycle. I see fortune coming in for you guys!!

A big change is already happening and a storm might occur soon as well - some problems or inconveniences may arise, it may cloud your view a bit but know that it is a sign of change and of growth! You’re stepping into a new life cycle and growing into your new form. For example, clashes or arguments may happen because of the new energy you’ll embody with people that are used to your old energy. That’s a natural process for both parties to get used to and to accept the transformation that is happening. You're clearing out the gloom and dust of your old life time and making space for the new you. Of course it’s important to work things through with the end goal of reconciliation in mind, be constructive in the way you’re communicating with the people around you. Just know that the rainfall after a storm or after the end of a war can be pretty pleasant! I see you afterwards feeling like lots of burdens have been taken from you.

Regarding the new energy you’ll embody: I see you full of positive and wild energy with an almost childlike optimism - like you could rule the world and nothing can stop you. You’re happy, I see you smiling brightly. You rebel against your past in a very carefree manner, leaving all the past worries behind. Again, you might make a few enemies on your way but just as many friends who can help you on your journey! If you’ve been someone that avoided conflict or just had people pleasing tendencies - you will grow out of this! And it’s for the best because if you want to embody your truest and most authentic form, there will always be people that don’t like it - mostly because they’re jealous! You’ll be more playful, have peak charisma and be full of enthusiasm especially towards love matters. 

Your love life might have been pretty dry for a long time… maybe even non-existent lol. But you’ve worked on yourself and focused on other important matters and now you will experience the rewards for it!! 

This will be a time of discovery as well. You will experience different sides of yourself. I don’t necessarily see a super duper long commitment coming in right now, I think you will just experiment a bit - getting to know yourself more like in regards to love and sexual matters (personal preferences and such). If you felt like you're behind on experience in regards to such matters in comparison to your peers, there is no reason to feel bad or ashamed because there is no general ‘right’ time to experience those things, there is only a right time for you in accordance to your personal journey, okay? And the time is coming for you, I can assure you. Just focus on yourself and treat yourself with kindness and respect and stay open towards all the new things that will come into your life. (But don’t forget to treat others with respect as well during your ‘rebellious’ journey.)

You will be shining, attracting lots of different suitors, trying out new things… Funnily enough during your reading I heard ‘casanova’ lmao - so you will turn a bit into casanova (regardless of your gender). And that’s perfectly fine! Speaking of gender, I think you might also experiment a bit with your sexuality, having experiences with the same gender and stuff like that. (This is a possibility - of course not for everyone of you but for some I can see it happening.)

Some quotes I got from my oracle for you:    ‘Be the flame, not the moth.’;   ‘Always be a free agent - promise fidelity to all.’;   ‘It’s not destiny, it’s opportunity.’ 

An angel number that could hold a message for you:   33

I wish you good luck and lot’s of fun my dear pile one😌✨

picture two

Hello my dear pile two, if you were hoping that I will tell you about the love of your life coming soon, I’ll have to disappoint you.  Well, 'soon' is a very vague word but you know what I mean. In the upcoming weeks or months, I see you having to gather strength - your own strength - as well as courage. I feel like in the past you often let yourself get used by the people around you, not just by your lovers, I also feel like by your friends and family as well. You undermined yourself and didn’t treat yourself with the respect you deserve especially in regards to relationships (in all forms) and love matters. And it’s coming to bite your a*s…. just kidding lmao. Nothing bad will happen to you but you can’t avoid it any longer, you need to step out of your comfort zone! - And I see you doing so! So, this is good. To be honest, at first it might feel a bit unpleasant and weird but it’s a process and it takes time. 

You know, I will just straightforward tell where you’re heading towards. I got the imagery/metaphor of a strong and assertive warrior who uses his intelligence. Someone who is unafraid of leaping into a battle and employing unconventional techniques to win. Someone who is fierce and rebels but ultimately stays loyal towards themselves. A champion.

I guess you could say you’ll transform into a badass queen or femme fatale but I feel like queen fits more because you’re taking your power back, sitting up straight and putting your crown back on your head (- regardless of your gender, adapt it as you see fit please). Your love life itself will rather be ‘passive’ because you have to focus on yourself and be more pickier. You will turn down anyone who is not on your level. You need to treat yourself with respect and especially others have to treat you with the respect you deserve. No more falling for players!! You’re a queen and you only accept people who are on the level of a king. It doesn’t have to be ‘the one’ right away but even a short term lover should fill all the criteria and if they don’t - bye bye! 

I know you are strong. But you have to act on this inner strength. Be careful with becoming rude or too ‘arrogant’ because this sometimes happens if we suffer some kind of inferiority complex. You need to step up your game but in a healthy way. I’m not sure if you will experience some kind of bullying or if you’re the one who bullies but there is some message of ‘bullying’. So, be careful with that…I feel like it’s more about you being the one who does so but It could also be both ways… mhm... Anyways, you’re transforming into this ‘queen’ where you’re embodying strength and maybe even power and there will be people in your environment that are not happy about it, more so envious or jealous. So, either way there is potential for conflict. Don’t trust everyone you interact with too quickly! And don’t share too much from your personal life with others! Some people won’t have your best interest in mind. There is even a possibility of someone sabotaging relationships or partnerships; again, this could go both ways - you doing it or others trying to do it on you. 

In your love life you will become someone who can defend themselves and who can fight back if necessary. ‘Don’t mess with me’- vibes. You won’t allow other people to play you anymore. Your inner strength will sky-rocket. You will build trust in yourself and face your ‘inner wild sides’ which you might have kept hidden for a long time. You will focus on your instincts… your raw, maybe even sexual instincts. Because you need to learn how to deal with them correctly and use them efficiently and not just to repress them. They will give you so much more energy and strength - strength you didn’t even know you had! You will be more independent and more able to trust and rely on yourself. You learn how to handle yourself in the correct way and this is great, especially for your future love life because if you don’t know how to handle yourself correctly how should your partner learn how to treat you correctly! With this growth period you will do the first step and show everyone the right way to treat you. On a side note, I feel called out to use another expression than ‘queen/king’ as well... This might be specific confirmation for some. So, in other words, in the upcoming time your love life might be more passive for now but you will focus on yourself and become the ‘trophy wife/husband material’ that you desire to be. I know some people think badly about these expressions but I would say that in our modern times, instead of just having a pretty appearance and being seen as just a nice 'accessory ' I would describe them as people who are physically pretty and very charming AND who have manners, skills and intelligence and know how to use them for their benefit and who are powerful, abundant and successful in public/business but also in their private life and have everything under control or at least appear like they have everything under control. Like the whole package yk. Maybe you guys will physically glow up or upgrade your wardrobe with high quality clothes and accessories. Either way, you will come out of this period shining brightly!

Some quotes I got from my oracle for you:    ‘Beauty is power - so use it rather than lose it.’;     ‘Age is just a number - irrelevant, unless it’s a vintage wine.’;    ‘Everyone is a potential character for a novel.’ 

An angel number that could have a message for you:   94 

I wish you good luck, I’m sending blessings out to you my dear pile two💖

picture three

Hello pile three! I can already tell you that happy times are coming! The first card that I got for you was the happily-ever-after ending card! It’s like you’re reaching a victorious conclusion after a difficult journey. You finally get a positive outcome - the most desired one even ... like a wish fulfillment! You will also get recognition for something which will feel like a triumph for you. You might also attend some parties or events celebrating something. I see you having lots of fun, enjoying yourself … I even want to add ‘for the first time in your life’!  I also see pleasurable encounters and intimacy with others.. maybe while dancing with someone? Or while going a little further? lol… Anyways, I see you getting out of your shell more. If you’ve been someone who often shut people out of their life or rejected any potential suitors preferring to be on your own because you found all those love related things ‘cringey’ (I feel mainly because you had issues with intimacy), this will be a bit different in the upcoming time! You've been warned…just kidding. There is nothing to fear because I can see you truly having fun.

In addition, I also see that many opportunities will arise/many doors will open for you! Many interesting potential suitors? Soulmates even? To be honest it doesn’t have to be limited to your love life but there will definitely be a few love related opportunities for you! Again, I have cards hinting at a great wish getting fulfilled and that you have potential for success in these times. You will also discover and develop new talents/skills which might be more important than any material treasure or rather more essential to your life. It is being said that you have the key within yourself to solve any kind of problem or in other words: You yourself are the key. 

But you’re being advised to also try to give others the key to your heart! In the upcoming days and weeks, you won’t  hide or isolate yourself anymore, you will let other people into your world! And that is good. It’s time to mingle with people. You will be more open to new things, towards other people and in your relationships with others but you should try not to be ‘too’ trusting. Ok that might sound contradicting or even funny to you because I feel like you are not the type to easily trust others and that is totally fine, you have your reasons. You’re not asked to easily give out your trust to others but you should stop pushing people away and not even giving other people the opportunity or chance to gain your trust!

The advice here is just to be careful with ambiguousness in other people’s behavior and words and take notice of any contradictions and inconsistencies between them. Through that you will discover other people’s hidden motives. Always ask yourself: cui bono - who does benefit from it? You will develop a keen eye for this in the upcoming days and weeks. Of course sometimes disappointing things happen but they are a part of love just like the intimate moments of affections that make us happy. Everyone experiences these bad moments but that shouldn’t be the reason to exclude ‘love’ from one’s life completely. 

I feel like you might not like to hear this (or hated hearing this while growing up) but you should definitely go out there more! Don’t hide yourself from the world or from the people - especially now! You should also enjoy your life, experience all those beautiful things because you deserve to have moments where you feel your heart beating, where you’re full of excitement, where you’re at peace with yourself and in the presence of someone else. And you should treasure those moments. So, be open towards love matters (potential suitors, love offers and opportunities) but don’t let yourself be fooled by any kind of deception, you’re smarter than that. If you have any plans like getting into a relationship or wooing someone specific, be slick …maybe even a little cunning while making plans and taking action! There is a chance of meeting a soulmate or just like minded people whose company you’ll enjoy greatly! If you’ll face any opponents, beat them at their own game with the same ‘weapons’! I can assure you, you are in control and luck is on your side! Anything you try to do now, will probably be a success. This is your time now. :) 

Some quotes I got from my oracle for you:    ‘Treasure those seconds when you felt your heart beating.’;     ‘Don’t allow any tourists into your own private Paris.’;    ‘To love someone and mean it is a rare and valuable thing.’ 

An angel number that could have a message for you:   102    ( or 10 and 2 separately )

Great times are ahead for you, I’m sending my blessings out to you pile three. 🔥

[pyreo]

I'm comparing the Dungeon Meshi manga to episodes I just watched and now I gotta capital-p Post about this one episode (spoilers past Episode 12)

So this part is an emotional side-step from the central throughline so far - Laios and Marcille got Falin back successfully and reunited, and they got that payoff from the very beginning where they thought it would be impossible. But Chilchuck is very much a part of these layers of development, so after that dragon finally dies, we stop for a second - Laios and Marcille are recovering, Falin has disappeared again - how does Chilchuck feel at that point?

It's the perfect stage to insert that because he didn't really share in that sense of victory in the same way as Laios and Marcille recovering someone extremely close to them. And that's on purpose because he keeps everyone at arms' length. As soon as that arc hits its end and Falin is recovered, there's at last space to ask - why is Chilchuck even here.

He's asking himself that through the chapter. Now that they've lost the person they intended to save, he regrets agreeing to come.

And starts shouldering responsibility for everything ending up this way. We saw that when he got stuck in the mimic room before - he refuses to let himself ask for help, or he'll try to take burdens alone to lessen relying on others. The original Touden Party was six people, and when Laios insisted on going back underground they were two, and he knew they would die, and figured maybe, maybe if they were one more, with his skillset, maybe they'd have a chance. He couldn't let them walk back down just to die.

And he's going back to that mindset - their lives are on me. He thinks he could have prevented this if he'd chosen differently. Essentially, the walk alongside the orc woman is him working through a guilt spiral.

He sees a second chance to correct that mistake of joining the party. He wants them out now, before they die. The orc asks him how they defeated a dragon and, in explaining it, he reminds himself of all the risky, ridiculous things they had to do, and he isn't satisfied with just getting lucky. Laios got his foot bitten off, on purpose! This proves to him that if they go any further they will not survive. And he hints at this dissatisfaction a couple chapters later, wishing his teammates prioritised things other than winning at all costs...

Like, obviously. The point of this chapter is Chilchuck pretending to be a self-serving coward. To the point where others react with disdain, even disgust, towards him because he wants to lie to Marcille and Laios to ensure they turn back. He's desperate to get out of a hopeless situation by any means necessary, and will destroy his standing in the group in a blink if it means nobody else dies. He has to go on a stupid mental health walk for his stupid mental health and talk through his little bout of panic and doubt.

'You called me a coward so don't be surprised when I act accordingly'

He needs someone very blunt to tell him 'dude you're not being a coward for wanting your friends to get out of hell alive. you're a coward for making excuses instead of honestly telling them your concern is genuine' and he BSODs about it. He needs to rant and externalise that frustration over their recklessness at a third party. He needs to scream that they are idiots because he's the only one for which the ends don't justify the means and he can't keep losing his mind over everyone's safety. Down to a point, the orc praises their ability to survive the explosion from the dragon's fuel sac, and it only justifies Chilchuck - Falin didn't even know she could cast the spell that stopped them all being killed, and they cannot continue getting lucky like this.

Anyway. The reason I stopped to think about it was this part-

Where he recovers Laios's monster-infused sword. The thing that made their situation in the dragon fight go from bad to worse, that he swore at Laios for in every language he knew. The most angry we'd seen him. And now he calmly picks it up and praises it for being the only one of them smart enough to make a run for it.

He's projecting, obviously. He's internalising the label of 'coward' and changing himself to fit it. And, look at him, he's so tired of this. It's evidence of his sheer exhaustion that his anger immediately disappears and he actually gives it a compliment. Him and Laios's sword, the group cowards, the only one who agrees with him.

Then, because he had a walk before getting into the argument, he's organised his feelings and drops all the walls and pretense and just says it.

There's a rule of writing where you contrast your high energy sequences with parts that are slow and mundane, to make the difference more apparent. I think that's why I like this bit so much. The fight against the dragon is long, and the emotional stakes are enormous. Right after that we have the bath scene with Falin and Marcille, and Laios ruffling Falin's hair, and this part that pauses everything to explore the stuff that Chilchuck finally needs to say. And it's wrapped in this neat little solemn journey to pick up their supplies and remember how it felt when all five of them had a meal around a real dinner table at last.

And because he doesn't resort to individualistic trickery, because he explains his point as a duty of care rather than pitting himself against the others, he gets backed up. Senshi agrees that they don't have the supplies to continue, and the orc lady mentions her brethren will return later and can give them support, all of which together breaks down Laios's singleminded devotion to his cause.

Personally I think the manga's better suited to comic timing, but in the anime you can get fleshed out little moments, like Laios's face journey as he realises the other three are making a good case for their survival.

This was my favourite part so far, and I like how both Chilchuck-centric episodes have separated him from the others. Because he won't reveal anything he's thinking otherwise. lmao

[solar-sunnyside-up]

I was explaining my Agoraphobia to a friend and she goes "But your so active in the community, the first person to speak up, so friendly, etc.."

Yeaaaa,, ugh idk how to tell all yall this bc I'm Miss "Act With Your Neighbors and Community" but it took me nearly 22 years to feel safe in my own house. Took 5 years of living alone in isolation, and then followed by another 5 years of marriage, and I am still struggling making the next step from

> Home Is Safe and Comfy

To

>Your community and neighbors are Safe and Friendly

Like, the work I gotta do to go to those events and engage and step outside of my comfy zone feels like walking on glass and like I'm breaking bones over and over.

But this is entirely true, its like momentum or calloused skin. It's hard and hurts but it's important.

I will be the friendly person at the bus stop or at the library you can ask for help from

I will be the safe and Comfy place in my neighborhood

I will make ppl believe that kindness and softness are good things we all deserve

Still hurts to do tho, I can accept that burden but it's still there

[dairy-farmer]

Tim is accidentally dosed with truth serum on a huge cross-team mission. Mostly everyone is trying to be polite and not ask questions but then someone (the ensuing chaos prevented anyone from identifying the person) asked Tim what his biggest kink was, and Tim said he has a Daddy kink.

Someone else nervously jokes that Tim must have a crush on Batman since he's a 'total leather daddy', which causes Tim to burst out laughing. Tim explains, between peals of laughter, that Batman is like an 'anti'-Daddy to him: Tim spent so much time essentially parenting Batman when he was younger that he could never see him in a sexual light. Yeah, he may have thought B was hot in the beginning, but that evaporated pretty damn quick; Tim describes it as being like when a wife stops being attracted to her husband because instead of helping and being a partner, the husband basically acts like another child - leaving messes for her to clean up, half-assing chores or straight up weaponizing incompetence, and just being a burden in general.

Tim wants a Daddy to take care of him and pamper and spoil him, and Batman has thoroughly proven himself to be incapable of that.

Needless to say, everyone loses their shit: laughter, incredulity, shouting additional questions. Most heroes were completely unaware of the parentification of Red Robin during his early years, and are heavily judging B for making a child shoulder his emotional and mental well-being.

Bruce himself is thoroughly disgruntled, partly because his coworker/friends are judging him, but maybe also partly because he was a bit attracted to Tim and upset that Tim saw him as the exact opposite of sexy.

(Bruce: I could be a good Daddy!

Dick: You barely manage to be a 'dad' half the time.😑)

While everyone is busy yelling/laughing/scolding Batman/whatever, Jason sidles up to Tim like: You know Red, I could be your Daddy if you wanted. *wiggles eyebrows*. Tim Looks him dead in the eye and says, "Hood, I've wanted to fuck you since before the Tower incident. If you promise to cook me dinner occasionally and spank me when I'm bad, I'll suck you dry on a daily basis."

Needless to say, it isn't until everyone has finally calmed down that they realize Red Robin and Red Hood are no longer there.

yessssssss!!!!!!!!!!1 i love this so much!!!!!! tim on truth serum admitting he has a MASSIVE daddy kink ❤️❤️❤️ but then also detailing about how bruce gives him the ick 😭😭😭, that if anything HE'S the daddy between him and bruce, that he's done everything but physically breastfeed him. that bruce is not erotic to him because of the amount of emotional labor he's had to endure for him and it has therefore made bruce essentially unfuckable 😭!