#still wish i knew his name!
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#mrs flood who are you: time lord edition
#dwedit#doctor who#mrs flood#fifteenth doctor#the master#jacobi!master#tenth doctor#jack harkness#martha jones#twelfth doctor#ninth doctor#*#okay here is my argument: mrs flood IS a time lord but her presence here has nothing to do with the doctor#instead she's here because of ruby. she's seemingly part of/related to the pantheon of discord & we know that ruby is connected to them too#so i think that she was deliberately placed as ruby's neighbor by the pantheon/oldest one/ruby's mom/? in order to watch over her#it also explains why she was there to check on ruby in 1.04. once she realizes she's on the phone w carla she says 'nothing to do with me'#and she leaves. which implies that it COULD have had something to do with her. if it had been something else going on#ANYWAY. to get to the time lordness of it all. rn i personally believe that she's a time lord that's been hiding on earth for 50+ years#bc i don't think she recognized the police box as a tardis initially. that first quote should be taken at face value.#instead picture this: she's watching over ruby as per usual. a police box is there - weird but nbd. then it dematerializes in front of her.#she drops her groceries. she's shocked. she kinda looks scared. if she already knew it was a tardis why would she react like that?#so imo she knows OF tardises. she DIDN'T know the police box was one. and she's worried the time lords have found her hence the fear.#but when nothing happens and nobody comes at her she realizes she's still safe#later when she sees the doctor she realizes the tardis is his/he must be a time lord. he doesn't identify her but that's happened before#so then when she asks him who he is i think what she's actually asking for is his title. WHICH time lord are you.#bc lbr if she knows abt tardises then she knows about time lords and if she knows abt time lords she knows what it means for ruby#to be joining him - and that's why she wishes ruby good luck. meanwhile this is clearly the outcome she WANTS (them to be together)#bc she gets visibly upset when the doctor seems to decide to leave without ruby.#and for once i'm not master clowning bc the list of names the doctor gives out is VERY interesting. some of them we've never heard before:#the bishop; the conquistador; later he adds the pedant and sagi-shi and reiterates the bishop AGAIN. so i wonder if she's the bishop.....
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POOR GABRIEL MONTEZ! YOU NEVER SAW THIS COMING DID YOU? ALL YOU WANTED WAS POWER. SECURITY. SAFETY. & THATS EXACTLY WHAT YOU GOT! JUST IN EXCHANGE FOR YOUR BODY. LETS JUST HOPE NO ONE FUCKS THIS UP. LETS JUST HOPE YOU WONT HAVE TO CLEAN UP THE MESS.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#cw gore#jrwi suckening spoilers#jrwi suckening#jrwi gabriel#jrwi gabriel montez#LOOK FAMILIAR?hahahahahDONT WORRY#IM REUPLOADING THIS HERE BC i fixed up the drawing a lil. and also i wanted to add main tags#U WONT SEE ANY DIFFERENCES BETWEEN THISSUN N THE POST ON MY SIDEBLOG.i changed the image there too.HA!!!!!!!#ANYWAY.i rambled plenty about pain and gabe on my sideblog.SO LETS TALK ABT THE ART SHALL WE.ihad i very hard time getting the colors down#would u believe i nearly left this uncolored??FUCKED UP!! it was only a sketchhow did it end up like this. it was only a sketch...#BUT IM RLY GLAD I WENT W COLORING IT.this time i actually used the airbrush n pencil tools BUT i also have a handy dandy brush i made#its just the mspaint air brush tool. fucking LOVE THAT THING. but now its in fire alpaca and it can be slightly transparent.IT LOOKS SOGOOD#perfect for splatters and grime.i love you mspaint i love youuu.im also so happy w the blood here.i think i reached a shift last year#back when i made that genloss fanart something abt the way i draw blood finally CLICKED and im like OH. the inside must always be darker.#like i KNEW that already but it was like my hand itself finally had it click.i wonder what i will learn next?I LIKE THE ORGANS HERE TOO#not as veiny or thready as i usually draw em. but i think thats fine. not as WET as id like em to be but thats also fine.#i got the point across. the point ofc being WOW THIS IS GRUESOME AND PAINFUL AND TERRIBLE#I LOVE HIS EXPRESSION.i love pain and thinking abt pain. you lose yourself to it after enough time passes of just being in an ocean o agony#at one point its just too tiresome to scream or writhe. theres a point when the body accepts it.sometimes.atleast.#OHHH GABRIEL AS A CHARACTER DELIGHTS ME SO MUCH.he is a dog to me.a thing to serve others.I WISH I KNEW MORE#WHAT ELSE DID YOU WANT BOY?? SURE POWER AND SECURITY AND SAFETY ARE NICE.BUT DID YOU HAVE DREAMS? WANTS? PASSIONS?#WHAT WAS THE STORY BEHIND THAT TIGER TATTOO ON YOUR ARM?WHAT DO THE DOGTAGS SAY BOY?I WISH I COULD HAVE TEA W U#OHHH TO SIT DOWN WITH A CHARACTER AND JUST SPEAK TO THEM. AND YET. AND YET IN THE END ITS ALL TRAGEDY AND COMEDY#TRAGEDY AND COMEDY THAT IS SO SO PAINFULLY UNBALANCED. SIGH.#WHATEVER CMERE BOY YOURE BECOMING AN OC OF MINE NOW UR GONNA BE IN SPACE AND UR NAME IS GONNA BE VINEGAR#UR STILL GONNA BE SHIP OF THESEUSED THOUGH. OOOHHH GABRIEEELLL GABRIEL MONTEEEZZZ#HOW MANY PEOPLE WERE BUILT INTO YOU.HOW MANY DID YOU LOVE AND CHERISH.HOW MANY TATTOOS DO U RECOGNIZE ON UR NEW ARMS#WHAT WAS IT LIKE? ON THE NIGHT U WERE SIRED?WERE YOU EXCITED? DID YOU SEE YOUR BOSS' FACE?WHAT WAS THIS PROMOTION LIKE?
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What’s with the Wells siblings and falling into fountains with their best friends?
#thunderstomm#tomm talks#tomm art#thunderstomm art#doodles#my doodles#the fairly oddparents: a new wish#the fairly oddparents#fairly oddparents: a new wish#fairly oddparents#hazel wells#dev dimmadome#antony wells#deja fop#OOOOUGH the new episode was so cute !! i knew i had to draw antony from the moment i saw him- he’s so cool!#I really like the design of his friend too- I think her name is Deja? as in deja vu? interesting… anywho she’s pretty and I had to draw her#hazel and dev are here too because I like them and they’re cool#I’m still not over the fountain parallel. like that’s way too intentional#they want us to draw that connection. has me curious for what happens next!!#I do hope we hear an antony update and he starts dating his friend. that’d be cute#what these parallels mean for dev n hazel I don’t know but I am seated nonetheless#okay to reblog#please reblog#!!#(:
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Gear 5 luffy's laugh is so contagious I just hear the drums and go insane how does this work. What did he do to me
#i still cant believe how much this new opening theme goes off.... DREAM SAVE ALL OF US 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH 💥💥💥💥💥💥#wait a second. the robot attacked 200 years ago. the void century was 800 years ago no????? what#oh see it was made 900 years ago.... but why did it attack 200 years ago then.... what happened#it is still so funny how they made evegapunk einstein but with some cunty long legs#200 years ago they gave rights to the gyojin!!! i see i see ✍️✍️also i still wonder why law and kuma have similar hat and pants designs#like there is NO WAY that much similarity isnt done on purpose. NO FUCKING WAY!!! I NEED ANSWERS!!!#are they annihliating cp ships akdhakskd yeah vegapunk letsgo#also the opening song is about dreams and the end one is about luffy reaching shanks...... havent got a clue why but there it is#talking tag#watching one piece#episode 1098#also is lucci named lucci bc it kinda sounds like luffy. SERAPHIM KUMA HAS HIS DEVIL FRUIT???? vegapunk could only make zoan fruits????#also wdym when cp0 acts it means its some historic event. lucci is like 25. where are the experienced people here#sentomaru works for vegapunk??? maybe i forgor about this tbh also do theu have a doffy seraphim??? the fact they have animal names....#stussy letting kaku get hurt akdhsjsn oh atlas has lamb ears..... and lucci said she is is prey... no..... the foresahdowing :(#lucci you fucked up she just gave luffy food... that a death sentence look what happened to kaido#episode 1099#<- oh my god btw. god. jesus.#why is akainu telling the cp0 what to do or thinks he can do that... thats the world gov... also thinkng about how garp should fight him#and not luffy.... because of ace you know... i still wonder how did sengoku know who ace's father was... there is only one man who knew....#everyone trying to stop them from fighting ajdhsksjks two rabid dogs fr#LUFFY TAKING OFF HIS JACKET WHEN LUCCI ASKS FOR HIS WANTED SIGN!!!! GO OFF KING!!!! SLAY!!! THE CREW SAW HIM!!! FINALLY!!!#i have been smiling since he started the transformation this is so sick...... i have got a case of the luffy brain#zoan fruits steal the personality of the user when they awaken ✍️✍️ luffy???? nami being the only one who saw gear 5 <3 twins manifesto#robin being so shook about luffy being a god ajdbjansk wdym devil fruits exist because people wish for them. fairy magic real????#WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY ARE FROM ALTERNATE REALITIES WHERE SOMEONE DREAMT ABOUT THEM??? DOES HE TRAVEL THRU REALITIES FOR THEM???#jinbe has been making this face 😧 every episode three times it is amazing ajdhaksnsk poor man... now he sees a kid angel version of himself#after seeing hia captain turn into a god... he is gonna get a stroke OMG SENTOMARU WE JUST GOT YOU BACK#episode 1100#<- CRAZY. INSANE. OH GOD. ONLY 12 LEFT. THATS A WEEKEND!!! I CANT DO THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Rowaelin Chapter 41 Kingdom of Ash:
She'd rebuild it—what she had been.
Perhaps one last time, perhaps only for a little while, but she'd do it. If only for Terrasen.
Rowan swooped from the mast, shifting as he reached her side at the rail. He surveyed the night-black sea beyond them. "You should rest." She slid him a glance. "I'm not tired." Not a lie, not in some regards. "Want to spar?" He frowned. "Training can start tomorrow."
"Or tonight." She held his piercing stare, matched his dominance with her own.
"It can wait a few hours, Aelin."
"Every day counts." Against Erawan, even a day of training would count.
Rowan's jaw tightened. "True," he said at last. "But it can still wait. There are ... there are things we need to discuss." The silent words rose in his animal-bright eyes. About you and me.
Her mouth went dry. But Aelin nodded In silence, they strode into their spacious quarters, its only decoration the wall of windows that overlooked the churning sea behind them. A far cry from a queen's chamber, or any she might have purchased as Adarlan's assassin.
At least the bed built into the wall looked clean enough, the sheets crisp and stainless. But Aelin headed for the oak desk anchored to the floor, and leaned against it while Rowan shut the door.
In the dim lantern light, they stared at each other.
She'd endured Maeve and Cairn; she'd endured Endovier and countless other horrors and losses. She could have this conversation with him. The first step toward rebuilding herself.
Aelin knew Rowan could hear her thundering heart as the space between them went taut. She swallowed once. "Elide and Lorcan told you... told you everything that was said on that beach."
A curt nod, wariness flooding his eyes. "Everything that Maeve said." Another nod.
She braced herself. "That I'm-we're mates."
Understanding and something like relief replaced that wariness. "Yes."
"I'm your mate," she said, needing to voice it. "And you are mine."
Rowan crossed the room, but halted a few feet from the desk on which she leaned. "What of it, Aelin?" His question was low, rough.
"Don't you..." She scrubbed at her face. "You know what she did to you, to ..." She couldn't say her name. Lyria. "Because of it."
"I do know."
"And?"
"And what do you wish me to say?"
She pushed off the desk. "I wish you to tell me how you feel about it. If…"
"If what?"
"If you wish it wasn't so."
His brows narrowed. "Why would I ever wish that?"
She shook her head, unable to answer, and stared over her shoulder toward the sea.
It seemed like he would close the distance between them, but he remained where he was.
"Aelin." His voice turned hoarse. "Aelin."
She looked at him then, at the pain in his words.
"Do you know what I wish?" He exposed his palms, one tattooed, the other unmarked. "I wish that you had told me. When you realized it. I wish you had told me then."
She swallowed against the ache in her throat. "I didn't want to hurt you."
"Why would it ever hurt me to know the truth that was already in my heart? The truth I hoped for?"
"I didn't understand it. I didn't understand how it was possible. I thought maybe ... maybe you might be able to have two mates within a lifetime, but even then, I just ….." She blew out a breath. "I didn't want you to be distressed." His eyes softened. "Do I regret that Lyria was dragged into this, that the cost of Maeve's game was her life, and the life of the child we might have had? Yes. I regret that, and I wish it had never happened." He would bear the tattoo to remember it for the rest of his days. "But none of that was your fault. I will always carry some of the burden of it, always know I chose to leave her for war and glory, and that I played right into Maeve's hands."
"Maeve wanted to ensnare you to get to me, though."
"Then it is her choice, not yours."
Aelin ran a hand over the worn wood of the desk. "In those illusions she spun for me, she showed me variations on one more than all the others." The words were strained, but she forced them out. Forced herself to look at him. "She spun me one dreamscape that felt so real I could smell the wind off the Staghorns."
"What did she show you?" A breathless question.
Aelin had to swallow before she could answer. "She showed me what might have been—if there had been no Erawan, if Elena had dealt with him properly and banished him. If there had been no Lyria, none of that pain or despair you endured. She showed me Terrasen as it would have been today, with my father as king, and my childhood happy, and..." Her lips wobbled. "When I turned twenty, you came with a delegation of Fae to Terrasen, to make amends for the rift between my mother and Maeve. And you and I took one look at each other in my father's throne room, and we knew."
She didn't fight the stinging in her eyes. "I wanted to believe that was the true world. That this was the nightmare from which I'd awaken. I wanted to believe that there was a place where you and I had never known this suffering and loss, where we'd take one look at each other and know we were mates. Maeve told me she could make it so. If I gave her the keys, she'd make it all possible." She wiped at her cheek, at the tear that escaped down it. "She spun me realities where you were dead, where you'd been killed by Erawan and only in handing over the keys to her would I be able to avenge you. But those realities made me ... I stopped being useful to her when she told me you were gone. She couldn't get me to talk, to think. Yet in the ones where you and I met, where things were as they should have been ... that was when I came the closest."
His swallow was audible. "What stopped you?"
She wiped at her face again. "The male I fell in love with was you. It was you, who knew pain as I did, and who walked with me through it, back to the light. Maeve didn't understand that. That even if she could create that perfect world, it wouldn't be you with me. And I'd never trade that, trade this. Not for anything." He extended his hand. An offer and invitation.
Aelin laid hers atop his, and his callused fingers squeezed gently. "I wanted it to be you," he breathed, closing his eyes. "For months and months, even in Wendlyn, I wondered why you weren't my mate instead. It tore me up, wondering it, but I still did." He opened his eyes, and they burned like green fire. "All this time, I wanted it to be you."
She lowered her gaze, but he hooked a thumb and forefinger around her chin and lifted her face.
"I know you are tired, Fireheart. I know that the burden on your shoulders is more than anyone should endure." He took their joined hands and laid them on his heart. "But we'll face this together. Erawan, the Lock, all of it.
"We'll face it together. And when we are done, when you Settle, we will have a thousand years together. Longer."
A small sound came out of her. "Elena said the Lock requires—"
"We'll face it together," he swore again.
"And if the cost of it truly is you, then we'll pay it together. As one soul in two bodies.
Her heart strained to the point of cleaving. "Terrasen needs a king."
"I have no intention of ruling Terrasen without you. Aedion can have the job."
She scanned his face. He meant every word He brushed the hair from her face, his other hand still clasping hers to his chest, where his heart pounded a steady, unfaltering rhythm.
"Even if I had my choice of any dream-realities, any perfect illusions, I would still choose you, too."
She felt the truth of his words echo into the unbreakable thing that bound their very souls, and tilted her face up toward his. But he made no move beyond it.
She frowned. "Why aren't you kissing me?"
"I thought you might want to be asked first."
"That never stopped you before."
"This first time, I wanted to make sure you were ... ready." After Cairn and Maeve. After months of having no choices whatsoever.
She smiled despite that truth. "I'm ready to be kissed again, Prince."
He let out a dark chuckle and muttered, "Thank the gods," before he lowered his mouth to hers.
"You're my mate." Her words were a breathless rush. "And I am yours."
The world might have been burning around them for all she cared, all he cared, too.
"Together, Aelin," he promised, and she heard the rest of the words in every place their bodies joined. Together they would face this, together they would find a way.
Together we'll find a way, their mingling breaths, the crashing sea, seemed to echo.
Together.
#Chapter 41#Kingdom of Ash#Sarah J. Maas#Aelin Galathynius#Rowan Whitethorn#Rowaelin#soulmates#mates#spoilers and notes in tags cause this chapter and also spoilers in post cause this chapter first read react with me read along#Rowaelin chapters scenes moments quotes#they want to make it possible bring that love to light#am I allowed to cry? — Again the word endured — finally the dream — the sand she still sees — he’s magic being steady — them talking time#again if Maeve could convince Rowan Lyria was his mate how bad was it when she convinced Aelin her actual mate was dead… this hurts me…#the fact Aelin stopped being useful because it destroyed her beyond belief but the dreams the dreams almost got her because its all she wan#again then both feeling sorry and the other not realizing and then consent and then comfort and love & I just wanted it2be U how could I no#I know you are tired Fireheart (ALL THE TROPES IN ONE LINE… UGH I MISSED THIS SHIP)#together. one soul in two bodies. their endgame like literally they are. I’d choose you too. even the apologies that were needed just heali#what it might have once been — together — not alone — not returning alone — the king and queen of Terrasen — I need u more — 2 whatever end#Aelin watched the boat until it disappeared trying not to stare too long at the clean unstained sand beneath her boots#always north — she didn’t care she just wanted far away — who knew — what she knew-the letters she sent-Valg-dark blood that had turned red#If it had been another dreamscape or some fragment that had blended into the very real memory of Connall's death. — always a plab&theory#all these things to deal with later-she’d rebuild all she had been-her match helper mirror-matched his piercing stare with her own-wait/res#A far cry from a queen's chamber or any she might have purchased as Adarlan's assassin. — how far we’ve come-she had ENDURED she can do it#I'm your mate she said needing to voice it. And you are mine. — Lyria. — I do know. and?&what do you wish me to say?-this was perfect#If what? If you wish it wasn't so. His brows narrowed. Why would I ever wish that? — Aelin. she looked at him at the pain in his words#the way it's changed since Mistward... and grown... even in names like Whitethorn Galathynius together — the brain thoughts are back —#The kiss was gentle-light. Letting her decide how to guide it. So she did. — he’d do it all night if that was what’s he wished#Together we'll find a way their mingling breaths the crashing sea seemed to echo. Together. — mountains and oceans#Might’ve been before-thought snapped-the bond- u r my mate&I am urs-the world might have been burning for all she cared all he cared too#Together they would face this together they would find a way. — claiming him as he claimed her — a scar a marker a tattoo
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guy who's unaware he's gonna spend the next 3-5 hours reworking the lyrics of dream sweet in sea major: haha maybe i'll write a silly little narrative for my hmself, wouldn't that be fun? :)
#chemi chats#ALONE ON THE EDGE OF PERIPHERY COMES THE WRONG TUNE (OR MISREMEMBERING WHAT YOU KNOW)#the ideal way for this to work is to make a mashup of Dream Sweet/Isle Unto Thyself/Intro to the Snow and sing to it#which sounds cool in theory and in my head but i cant make that hfgjh i wish i knew music but i only know how to sing :')#their current names are Petal for Heart | Synapse for Mind | Soli for Soul :0 all are names for parts of a larger sum/whole#there's a vague storyline that i think is very interesting but parts of it might need to be scraped. hmmm alas. still very cool tho!!#''Petal (pedantic) / Synaptic (sycophantic) / A blade before the brow / A seam so it seems I *screamed*''#in theory the timeloop would be contained to just this song. And you can make them loop by sticking the song on repeat :]#Soli has a sword!! because what else would be in character for me lmao. He's music coded (a Soli is a solo done by more than one person!)#The conductor and the baton! Petal has flower imagery (instead of a blindfold he has a flower in his left eye)#I'm not sure what to do for Synapse exactly because synapses arent actually very aesthetically pleasing lmao#maybe star coding. because that's my other aesthetic? ough idk!! dont know about this guy hkjgh#im not very good at making characters hkjhg this is why im a fanartist hkjg#i am decent at writing lyrics and im very good at storytelling though so let's see what we can make~!!#but. not right now. bc i am soooo sleepy jhkjdhg
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tl reminded me of daigo alone at the bar after mine's death its high time i go to bed now
#snap chats#sorry im a cowboy this week ig who the fuck says 'high time'. please get shot#at high noon ..... high time i was shot at high noon on my high horse ... or waht the fuck ever#anyway idc if i literally. make this post every mont its just amazing how im still not over it#dark ass dank ass lonely ass bar daigo sittin in . at least the bartender there .... hi friend .#he's an integral character to me in minedai lore i wish he had a name#he was the witness to minedai. i was gonna say he's the only one that can vouch it was real#but dawg lbr ... hamazaki fuckin knew what am I talkin about 😭😭 like he's dead too but 💀💀💀#BUT DATE FUCKIN KNEW DAWG still mental how this was.n ot at all a fucking secret#like yall think that was ever a thought whether they were Together together or not#just 'it could be troublesome if everyone knew how close i am with this guy' or something like that#meanwhile everyone and their third cousin's aware of the homosexual relations between the tojo chairman and his captain#A tier trope ..... ok im sleeping now lest i stay up all night thinking of minedai. again.#good night everyone i saw creepypasta on my dashboard some minutes ago and im concerned for the year im in
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i have to admit i think about mark blackthorn in "tales from the shadowhunter academy" at least once a week
#'helen julian livia tiberius drusilla octavian. and emma. you see? i have not forgotten. every night no matter what has happened during the#day no matter if i am torn and bloodied or so bone-tired i wish i were dead-#i look up at the stars and i give each star a brother's name or a sister's face. i will not sleep until i remember every one.#THE STARS WILL BURN OUT BEFORE I FORGET.'#'there is nothing wrong with ty but he is different and the clave hates all that is different.-#they will try to punish him for being who he is. THEY WOULD PUNISH A STAR FOR BURNING.'#'[tavvy] is so little. he won't remember dad or m- or his mother. he's the littlest thing. they let me hold his hand when he was born and-#his head fit into the palm of my hand. i can still feel his weight there even when i cannot grasp his name. i held him and i knew i had to-#support his head: that he was mine to support and protect. forever. oh but forever lasts such a short time in the mortal world.-#he will not remember me either. maybe drusilla will forget as well. i do not think so though.-#drusilla learns everything by heart and she has the sweetest heart of us all. i hope her memories of me stay sweet.'#'jules. my artist. my dreamer. hold him up to the light and he would shine a dozen different colors. all he cares about is his art and-#his emma. he will try to help helen of course but he is still so young. they are so young and so easily lost.'#'“helen julian livia tiberius octavian. and emma” mark whispered his voice low and revered. one simon recognized from the synagogue-#from the voices of mothers calling the children from all the times and places he had heard people call on what they held most sacred.'#“are you here to save me?”#i was unwell when i read that#i think about that quote so much#also also there's more#“i might as well be dead for all the good i am to my brothers and sisters.”#SOMEBODY SEDATE ME#honourable mention to simon's response: “'oh mark blackthorn what are they doing to you?' simon whispered.”#also “all that is good and true is lost.”#aaand#ok i am done now#have a nice day<3333#tales from the shadowhunter academy#tftsa#simon lewis#simon lovelace
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.
#really randomly fell down a weird rabbit hole today#i was watching the X-Files and finally felt like reading up on david duchovny#like i see u fellow slav what kind of slav are you#so i opened up his wikipedia article and saw that his dad was jewish and from ukraine and went like AHA WE ARE THE SAME#and just out of curiosity looked up the place he's from because im curious about jewish shtetls in the ukraine#because my whole family except my biological father is from several of them and i thought hey maybe they were neighbors#which they fucking are omg theyre just 20km apart#my greatgreatgrandma is from makhnivka which i even found articles and history about and how the jewish population grew & declined#even though i did not find any steinbergs in the archives#anyway when i read up on Berdychiv where duchovnys family is from it said#early settlement by the Chernyakhov Culture#which was an archeological culture between 200 and 500 CE existing at the same time as the roman empire#....... is this how i finally find out where my name is from??????? like?????????#i wish i knew so much more than i do#like i only found out that im not russian i was just born in russia like 7 years ago or so??? because my mom never tells me anything#all the information about my great great grandparents and where theyre from is from my grandma#and her dementia is really bad now and shes just angry and screams and calls people names#my russian is too bad to properly read up on stuff like that and theres barely anything in english or german#i just want to know idk#but genetic testing is too expensive and also very america centric and the only family i have in the us is super conservative#i had to block them on facebook when my grandma made me write to them once over 10 years agl#and i know a huge chunk of my grandmas family moved to israel too so i dont want anything to do with that either#although id be curious if it would actually find my half siblings i found out about also like 8 years ago#i just wish there were more archives and more people i could talk to about this#on my grandfathers side theres nothing really left#my grandfather passed suddenly and apparently before he did he took ALL THE FAMILY PHOTOS AND DOCUMENTS somewhere to maybe digitalise them#but we dont know where so theyre literally gone for ever#but his whole family was from kiev and is apparently named after this culture era#his dad was a higher up at a sugar factory and i still cant find anything#my grandma had so many cousins and they were so interconnected and knew so much and i literally just have my mom and no one else
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sorry i don't have anything to say about the "to hell and back" two-parter! it's a really good episode with some great guest characters and some real emotions. but it's based off robert pickton and that's all i can think about. may he rot.
#my Indigenous Studies teacher knew one of his victims#she found out through the Sun while in line at a checkout#(im not sure who she didnt specify and none of us asked for more details. if i knew i would of course say her name)#also just. preemptively. i see a lot of americans in conversations about pickton going 'omg how could they have only given him 25 to life?'#it's because that was the most severe sentence possible at the time. and still kind of today?#new legislation in 2011 allows parole ineligibility periods to be served consecutively instead of concurrently but “life w/o parole” still#isn't a sentence on its own. it's just something i wish more americans knew because there's so much important conversation to be had about#how catastrophically those women were failed in life and in death. but pickton's sentence isn't an example of it that's just a country#having a different justice system than yours. and i want people to devote more time to the many MANY actual failures.#if that makes sense?? like. be outraged about everything else! but again that part is literally just Different Countries Have Different Law#not tagging the episode or series. idk. just feels wrong#hopefully none of this comes off as insensitive. just yeah this episode is a little too real for me to talk about as a work of fiction
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When Diluc gives his heart to someone and genuinely enters a relationship with them, that's it–that's it for him. There will never be any other that could hope to replace them, whether they leave him or they pass on.
#hc; diluc#//He might have his fair share of little crushes here & there; rarer still a one night stand or two (hasn't rlly done that since Snezhnaya)#//But once he's actually in a proper relationship with someone; and he ONLY will do so after a certain level of trust/bond has been forged#//Bc once that is settled...he's truly ALL theirs. His heart settles on them; no wavering nor hesitation#//Forever; until he would draw his final breath#//Doesnt matter if their breakup was the messiest fucken shit or amicable; if they died in the most heartrending way or at peace in his arm#//He will love & adore them even still; no matter what sorts of emotional turmoil the feelings put him through/he tries to hide them behind#///They will HAUNT him; unless he may have them again or he meets an untimely demise and joins them#//There are some cases where he will try to pursue them again; but those are very few and far in between#//Anywho; guess who watched H.B aGAIN#//And the fact that some owls are monogamous for life is a big inspo too nkjgnygkj#//Bro reads abt his family's special birds and was like BET#//I CAN DO THAT TOO#//Nah; I'm kidding#//He just takes love VERY seriously. Extremely so. He saw his father pining for his mother to the end of his days#//And thought to himself THAT is how much love I want to have for someone. THAT is the level of loyalty and affection I ought to hold#//It would take an extremely special case for him to waver on this fact; for him to be able to move on from that previous person#//It's exactly WHY it takes so much trust and rapport between them for him to decide to let himself fully fall for someone#//Bc he knows he will NOT get over them so easily; they hold his heart so precariously in their hands#//He would never truly move to retaliate on them if they broke his heart though. Bc even hurt; he would NEVER want to hurt them in turn#//But yeah; bro would take it SO hard. Esp if he sees them move on too quickly for his taste#//Would carry on his day by day; but BOY would he be aching inside. BOY would his eyes ligner and follow where they'd go#//BOY OH BOY would their name grace his lips;like a silent prayer for their wellbeing; a helpless wish for them to have never left his side#//Bro would PI N E; and pin HARD. Harder than he did BEFORE they got together#//Worst part is he wouldn't be as cautious in letting them back in as he ought to be. He might act guarded; but those are Cardboard defense#//He may be sterner and more stoic than everyone who knew him growing up saw him as; but he is still the softhearted loving boy he was then
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Ok I know a lot of people don’t like Bronev or make him out to be abusive as a result but I think its so much more interesting if he isnt?
It was said on multiple occasion that he was a good person that got consumed by his obsession with the Azrans
He’s just an asshole who selfishly made all the wrong decisions justifying himself by having to make sacrifices that ultimately hurt the sacrificed people, among which is his family, significantly more than himself.
And that creates so many interesting conflicted and contradicting relationships with various characters!! Bronev is an interesting villain!!
#professor layton#bronev#leon bronev#by sacrifices i mean rachel and his sons as well as emmy#probably also the people targent killed and blackmailed#like he literally says he wants the azran legacy for the betterment and improvement w technology for humanity or something#but any normal person would know that maybe killing a hell of a lot of people in the name of greater good isnt....actually a good path#i think bronev just keeps saying (to others AND himself) that 'oh no look my story is so tragic my wife is dead i had to leave my kids....'#he didnt even follow up on his wife's last wishes#shes like 'i wish i couldve seen our kids again.....our dream lives on within you :)'#and hes like 'yes rachel i know what i must do.....take over targent and create a corrupt military organisation that kills people for profit#also emmy layton and descole with bronev are such interesting relationships bc theyre all different#also ive had several people in the notes of my art going 'oh yea bronev probably emotionally neglected her' or#'she probably didnt have too great of a life etc etc'#and like i think no! i think it was okay for the most part and post story she still likes bronev. visits him in prison. sends him letters#but feels SO goddamn guilty that she does like this person who obviously did so many bad things especially to people she knew too like layto
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the fauaki in pt2. <-still doesnt have the guts to read ch17 n 18
#stardust speaking !#was thinking about it on n off today cuz i was cleaning up my screenshot folder and saw that + some of brads pov#like...what da heeeeelllllllllll#not gonna talk about the lines cuz i dont wanna spoiler tag but each time i think about that + the teacher meeting early on i#?#came after the disaster that was me reading fausts tanabata card too#fausts characterization in pt2 is enough for me to wanna cry to ppl i know about reading the wizards cuz i think its so neat to read#(all of them r tbh i dont speak enough about cains but AS A CAIN FAN.....?)#but the less my friends know the better cuz then i can go on here n talk about whatever the hell i wanna#in my faust era again. during figaros bday month. comedic <-person who doesnt have the guts to catch up pt2#cant wait for the brad era to return each time i think of his pov i go :] hes soooooooo neat#'when r u writing' i wish i knew too#pt2 n calling akira by name still makes me 🤯 btw. will nvr recover
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sometimes, the tumblr experience is having someone show up in your notes for the first time in YEARS, and, due to the new "mutuals" tag feature, realising you must have accidentally unfollowed them when you purged your following a while back and are now like. the reinstatement of mutuals vs the mortifying ordeal of making them directly aware i unfollowed them
#will speaks#despite the fact i knew they were abandoning their blog we had been close friends i never would have unfollowed them on purpose#maybe they're not even actually coming back to tumblr and we haven't even spoken since like 2017 and maybe i'm overthinking this and it#doesn't even matter#hi i'm autistic and have adhd if we don't explicitly end our friendship we could not talk for 10 years and i would still consider you a#friend#gods fuck. anyway. hi if you specifically even somehow see this and can somehow determine it's about you despite#a. my url and probably whole blog is different and b. i have gone through several name changes since we last spoke. you might not even know#that it's /me/. seeing your url in my notes was whiplash and man i wish i had the guts to message you and catch up#but i don't. so
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shoutout to todays customer who returned his sunglasses because they gave him headaches and when i asked if he wanted me to check to find the cause of it he refused ONLY to 5minutes after the return ask why they could cause him to have headaches when his daily clear ones don’t
fun fact 1: he was supposed to come in at 4pm because he wanted his money back in cash and we didn’t have that much in the morning, but he came during noon and i had to scrape some together fun fact 2: he asked my male coworker why they would cause issues when i was the one who took on his request for...some....reason....could it be....sexism.....no it can’t be (:
another shoutout to the woman insisting we give her mother who has diabetis, sees double AND can’t speak german and eye exam and tell them why she can’t see well even after me explaining to her that we can’t measure her prescription as well (or at all) like an actual doctor can due to both machinery AND lack of medical knowledge....surprise: it didn’t work out and the result were wonky and she may need prisms but maybe not who knows not fucking me because we skipped like 2dpt between slides at some points and none of the prescriptions i offered and adjusted cleared her seeing double (: yes hi hello i can actually do my job and know what is possible and what isn’t (:
#txts#on the lower end of rant news we had one customer who was angry his lenses were thick#....like....sir you chose the most basic ones which aren't even really sold anymore afaik with +3dpt#ofc gucci frames the size of half the head to over ex....aterate oh god i forgot the word....anyway#so they get extra big#i am just amazed he didnt insist on mineral ones tbh but hey a small win#but hey....surprise: if out of the at LEAST 4 options you pick the general very basic ones when you need big lenses....shits gonna get thicc#'it looks bad!!!' yeah no shit but you didnt want to spend money on the lenses i GUESS#idk i wasnt there#and i am not paid enough to discuss with customers what lenses best fit to avoid this case beyond a recommendation#you can always choose other ones but if you ever get mad and tell someone I either forced them on you or didnt offer anything else#i will maul you#and also no one will believe you because my coworkers know my sale rhythm and i know theirs....so....fuck you we all hate you and talk shit#about you#sometimes even while you're still there and sometimes w/ other customers as well#another favourite is people asking why we cant insert new lenses into certain frames#i swear i WISH i knew why they were made like this#i really.really wish i knew#but we are as lost as you#(actual favourite tho that wasnt sarcasm i just like to shittalk brand-name frames because so many are shit lol)#like the ones who actually specialize or focus on frames are usually got#-ray ban because they decided to fuck themselves hard#apparently they were rly good once? havent found a new one showing that yet rly but k i'll trust y'all#but some are just....literal plastic#for frames??? like the whole thing????#bitch this will break if i sneeze on it wtf are you doing#insta modeling?? tf are they for???#+another favourite is some of them going#'oh they have 100uv protection'#yeah so does every plastic lens+100uv isn't uv400 at least in germany fuck off
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i remember one time i heard something that was like "most women have been or know someone who has been assaulted and most men know or have known someone whose assaulted a person before" and then all at once every memory of girls and women and afabs and fem aligned people i'd ever known telling me about how a man had abused or assaulted them came flooding back to me and i was like. Oh.
#tara says stuff#assault mention tw#assault tw#abuse mention tw#abuse tw#my own mother was once psychically assaulted and it permanently damaged the hearing in one of her ears#i knew a girl in middle school who was sexually assaulted by her father. we were in band together#there was a another girl i knew during that time who'd also been assaulted and had gotten pregnant and had a daughter who was taken away#all the boys in class seemed to hate her and would pick on her and i got so upset over it once that i hit one of them#he had used to be my friend and i cried in the bathroom afterwards#one of my oldest friends was sexually abused by their babysitter as a child and just seeing his name is horribly triggering for them#and whenever i think about this stuff i always wish i had been there to do something and to protect them#some of these people live in entirely different countries than me and i still wish i was there to help them#just#god#i cant stand it#i cant stand the thought of anyone being treated like that and the perpetrator just getting away with it#it makes me sick me my stomach#i wish i could take the memories and the worries away and bear the weight of it for them#i dont want them to hurt anymore#even if they arent hurt over it now i want to take it away
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