#still trying to get used to this website
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back with sonic doodles!! been a while
#sonic fanart#sonic oc#sketch dump#sonic the hedgehog#sth#surge fanart#my art#still trying to get used to this website#WILL be posting again soon! working on some secret santa art atm#I SWEAR ILL BE ACTIVE
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fatt pin-up week 2: intimacy
a room & a bed
version from before i started messing with the bg & overlay colors (<- what a pain!!!). i like this one too.
#rosa art#palisade#art#fatt#friends at the table#phrygian#also someone in bed. decide for yourself who...#fatt pinup week#i'm really trying to mostly have fun with these.#messing with colors still takes some time...#which includes spending a reasonable amount of time on it. taking shortcuts. not focusing on details too much#lately I'm really interesting in using different brushes in the same picture to contrast stuff. worked out well here I think#the blanket is from a. weighted blanket website. i sketched over it & then painted the sketch#I can't do folds that well on my own. not yet.#i had a very specific vision for this that's not quite realized.... that's fine though i can try again#i'm not planning to stop drawing phrygian any time soon. + i wanna get better at interiors generally
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just need to give a shoutout to all the people who interact w me or the things i make on here for the love and good vibes. twitter's been pissing me off the past couple days and i just think it reaffirms i'll never really leave tumblr bc the fandom culture here is just so much.. more lol
#more respectful funnier more loving more fun in a lot of ways#getting lectured by ppl years younger than me abt why posting shit without credit is ok when its like#all the best and most fun fandom spaces are dying#ppl are growing up sure but all these ppl are like 'i used to make gifs so heres why ur wrong' and its like#oh you USED to? well whyd u stop ? bc the effort level wasnt worth it just to be#saved and reposted w ill intent or not get any interaction like its so#everything is abt a race for interaction on the dumbest n most unoriginal jokes#its extremely frustrating to try to justify spendinf any time doing anything online anymore when ppl are so fcuking flippant like its crazy#'heres a shitty unsized n uncoloref gif i ran through some website and IM okay w ppl reposting' like lol#anyway when giffing dies itll be a sad fuckinf day to me jfkd truly a useless skill#but that means everyone still doing it is doing it for the love of the game or#the love of archival work and it makes ppl beinf so fuckinf disrespectful#or going to bat for nonsense seem so absurd to me like#really . really. if u have an option to share where it originally came from with one less click#ur gonna choose NOT to do that and instead repost just to insinuate the person who made it did it to insult someknes appearance#like. its just so.#fandom is dying and its so sad and etiquette is nowhere to be found so NXKKD gratefuo for the ppl gere#and sorry for the rant#none of thise matters but ive had an abundance of free time the past few says so ive been STEWING#mostly just want to say i love u all NDKKS and even if ive complained abt interaction its mostly just tbing website dying more than anything#which. is so sad lol#but i love everyone still here
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every time i see discourse about fundraisers go by on here im just fully struck with the realization that not a single one of you people have either taken a cybersecurity fraud prevention course or bothered to take one singular second to consider the website youre on. this is the broke bitches website. none of us can afford to fund our mutuals' grocery bills, much less entire evacuation funds, and CERTAINLY not FAKE evacuation funds taking advantage of genocide victims. all this shit abt how people are deliberately choosing not to fund every post that passes their dash because they hate palestinians literally just does the work of actual scammers for them by laying the high-pressure sales tactics groundwork, and the "do you guys have any idea how hard it is to keep coming up with new attention-grabbing fundraiser posts?" ones just ring EXTREMELY hollow because YEAH! YEAH I DO! and so does everyone i follow! and everyone they follow! because all of us are FUCKING BROKE and surviving on crumbs! i just saw one that said "i make sure to keep $40 in my wallet at all times so i can give $20 to any panhandlers i see, this is the same" and its like!! good for you, thats very nice, but like!!! you need need NEED to take a step back and realize that /being able to do that/ is a position of privilege, not the default setting to be a good person. i wont discount that some people do ignore fundraisers specifically because of racism because Of Course, but like. a) yelling at them isnt gonna make them stop, or more accurately yelling at /everyone else/ isnt gonna make those people stop, and b) trying to apply that as a blanket motivation for everyone just. realistically doesnt work. not donating is a nonaction, it is the literal default status, and while in specific situations you can use CONSISTENT absence of SPECIFIC actions to track a person's motivations SOMETIMES, broadly speaking that just. doesnt work.
there are 8 billion people on this planet. most of them will never know you exist. of the ones that do, most will not be able to help you. of the ones that can, most will not be on the broke bitches website passing the same communal $20 around. consider your audience and stop shitting on fellow poor people for having the gall to need to be careful with their money. and if you are genuinely only posting your fundraiser to tumblr, like. im sorry, but you need to anticipate not reaching your goal and prepare accordingly. theres a reason the last big scam scandal people talk about actually getting the money is like. all-or-nothing era, as a website none of us have the funds to make that kind of thing happen anymore or the security to risk it. a fundraiser not meeting its goal on here is not a personal sleight against whoever made it, its just how life goes sometimes. and it's unfair and it sucks and we should help however we can, but. sometimes you just arent able to help someone else, and continuing to feel responsible serves only to torture yourself. and blaming OTHERS serves only to move that guilt from yourself off onto another person. i imagine that has to be where a lot of the vitriol comes from, is people who cant afford to donate more getting pissed at people they see as having the funds but choosing not to share them, but again, sometimes you just are not able to achieve the goals you set out towards, through no fault of the specific parties involved.
people on tumblr choosing to buy groceries rather than potentially donate to a scam are not your enemy and are not the ones facilitating a genocide. we're all victims of the same horrific system, the question is just how that system manifests its influence on each of us. poverty kills just as thoroughly as a bomb. everyone is just doing their best to survive, and as much as we like to pretend that everyone should be a perfect selfless angel that puts others before themselves no matter what, humans are by default a selfish species, and it is a lot easier to say what youd do in theory than actually do it. and there's a reason you have to put on your own oxygen mask before helping the person beside you, youre of no help to anyone if youre too dead to do anything.
#origibberish#and inb4 someone goes 'are you saying poverty is as bad a situation as GENOCIDE' be so fucking fr with me i s2g#yall know thats not what i mean so if we can just skip the part where we pretend you dont and quibble about semantics thatd be great#also ive seen multiple posts being like 'i cant believe yall are saying EVERY FUNDRAISER FROM PALESTINIANS is a scam' which#uh. no one was saying that?#people were saying that. some scammers were using the genocide as their scam? which. is true? there have been? several confirmed?#like. most arguments in this i can see where theyre coming from but that just. literally is inaccurate#i cant even call it disingenuous even though it clearly is because thats just. so far off of what literally anyone was saying that i have#trouble interpreting it as anything other than a deliberate exaggeration to stir emotional responses.#like. ive said before i see little value in going 'zomg a psyop!!' but that more than anything made me be like#if there was anyone on this website i had to pick to be running a scam using palestine as a cover it would be that person. because just. how#the fuck do you get that interpretation unless youre deliberately trying to emotionally manipulate people into not using#their critical thinking skills to determine scams from real fundraisers.#oh also the posts being like 'even if some are scams‚ so what? you should still risk it'#like genuinely if you have shared that one i have 0 respect for you. like that just. is not how things work in the real world when you#need money to survive.#and when the stakes are 'help save someone from genocide or help someone taking advantage of genocide victims' like.#you really cant see why people would be a little nervous abt that without it being some deep seated personal hatred?#you cant see why picking the wrong one there might weigh on a person?#just. idk. ppl on here need to get better at trying to see others' perspectives i think
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Bruh how much did tumblr fucking pay for tumblr live that they’re willing to not only make us re snooze it every goddamn week, but now they’ve put the “create post” button on the dashboard??? Blocking the visuals of posts to make room for tumblr live? I can’t with mobile tumblr. Most sucky experience of all time.
@staff
#not dogs#tumblr#@staff get your shit together nobody asked for this#what piss poor developer needed something to do that you just had to change#a very easy and accessible and user friendly function#you know…the one that keeps this website running: creating posts#you can still disable tumblr live but now it leaves a nice blank space where ‘create post’ used to be instead!!#stop. trying. to. be. TikTok
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2023 fujoshi wrapped
you got baited 24 times
you debated the difference between queer-coding, queerbaiting and censorship in the comments section 4 times
you revisited fanfiction for 7 hit ships from the 2000s
you got blocked 5 times for tagging paragraphs of old man yaoi ship meta on unrelated text posts
you played 585 hours of video games for a combined total of 10 minutes of gay subtext and/or sex scenes
you judged a BL manga or light novel by its cover 948 times
you told 39 friends to watch 3 gay tv shows that are 'actually really really well written and enjoyable and not just gay' and 0 of them did
#respectively: 1) my new boss is goofy. and I enjoyed it. 5 stars. would get baited relentlessly again#2) literally like. is anything queerbaiting but supernatural and maybe parts of sherlock. up for debate. anyway I still can't believe#someone called GAME OF THRONES queerbaiting. I'm still reeling from that.#3) Oh You Know.#4) I can't believe I found out paragraphs of tags annoys people. sorry for being alive on the Paragraphs of Tags blogging website I guess.#(this is because they now show up in notifications I know. I have been trying not to post like. Personal Lore as much like I used to.#trying to keep it related!!! :( sorry for annoying people... it's just how I've always blogged...)#5) disco elysium is the joke here but the hour count really. let's be real. bg3#6) I do have a pretty good accuracy rate on whether a BL is going to be good based on the front cover art alone honestly. you can just tell#7) AND THIS IS ONLY ABOUT DEADLOCH AND IWTV WHICH I STILL CAN'T BELIEVE SO MANY OF YOU HAVE NOT WATCHED#do NOT get it twisted. 6) is about THOSE two shows. and also black sails eternally#kira for ts#bored at work. ama
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put your 'on repeat' playlist on shuffle & let your friends pick their favorite of the first five songs!
thanks for tagging @alicentgwayne :') open tags because i am so so drained rn
#surprisingly not a lot of tswift this time shdfjsdkf#king of my heart is an older remnant but other than that wow a bit of a reflection of the dire straits my mental state is in huh#the burn out / october crisis is real and unfortunately out to get me again#tag games#also yes i am using any opportunity to yap but yeah no i tried to break from here#but it turns out i am very dependent on this website for dopamine in trying times and i still can't get it. sighhh i can't wait to be free
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felt like i was going crazy yesterday trying to set up a login system for this website 😭 it was like i was back in college again!
#im using supabase for auth and i was like someone pls...show me how to do this...with just vanilla js#every tutorial is with like react or next#im trying to do this site with just html css and js (and php)#so i can learn#and later if i wanna move things to a framework i wont be completely lost if something breaks!#but yea i pretty much settled on like using react for part of the website so i can get this login set up#i found some videos and articles so im pretty sure its possible#other options is to use the archived js example i finally found for supabase auth but#it scares me that its archived#fingers crossed next time i code this works#i think this has to be the hardest part of the coding#i wish i could do my own auth thing but thats super dangerous as a beginner#anyways if i get stuck again ill just try the archived js example#and if im still stuck...#idk find another auth thing to use ig#BF RALLY WILL HAPPEN IT WILL#if it doesnt it means i died or someshit lol#but yea im mainly just like ugh about react cause i seriously dont need all those libraries added rn#this sites not supposed to be that complicated imo like yea its dynamic but its like a neopets like thing#the partial react thing doesnt rely on installing a bunch of stuff (i think)#so maybe we r good#????#web development#webdev#coding#codebreakers#if someone has the magic video to hand hold me through these pls send lol
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the state of online streaming piracy these days is fucking abysmal........
#half the servers never work and the ones that do are always the ones without subtitles#and theyre all made to have such sleek interfaces i dont NEED that#like this used to be SO easy#you could find ANYTHING#give me websites that look like they havent been changed since the early 2000s that arent trying to mimic netflix#and finding subtitles has always been trickier but there was a while there where you COULD get subtitles pretty reliably#the best website for actually finding stuff. in my experience is primewire. which still looks old and nonfancy#unfortunately theres no built in subtitles on anything#theres often a list of subtitle files you can download and theoretically upload to what youre watching#but i can never get it to work reliably#anyway i tried to watch newsies on my friends disneyplyus and it just played the audio over a black screen#im wondering if thats how theyre doing their anti-password sharing lmao. bc it let me log in and browse. but then did that.#r.txt#im willing to download things but my HARD DRIVE BROKE
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On tumblr when you post you’re just playing Russian roulette with your post getting attention, but it’ll probably get ignored.
On Reddit any comment you make outside of some very niche community will immediately have someone downvoting you and calling you like, three different insults. Then they will wonder why you only log in every couple months. Like, it’s a very helpful website when you have a question for another community you’re in, but you’ll also get someone being immediately hostile when you make an innocuous post on a garden subreddit 😑
At least on tumblr people have to actually seek out your random ass text posts and go out of their way to start shit, and you don’t have the up and down vote system that feels like playing with my self confidence and worth issues.
Both websites are toxic part of the time (what social media isn’t?) and both are actually more useful for weird people, but holy shit does Reddit feel more aggressive about shit. Maybe it’s just the devil you know, but at least on this mess of a website half your hate will be for the most random shit and misunderstandings that people have to seek out finding if your blog is a normal size. Reddit is either posting on a dead sub or getting immediately thrown to the, well, sharks and wolves aren’t actually super aggressive towards humans under normal circumstances, so something else that could tear you apart instantly for just existing in the same space as them.
#emma posts#there’s a reason i stopped spending as much time on that site#multiple actually. but one of them is that website is like ‘rsd trigger simulator’#and tumblr is like ‘how dare you say we piss on the poor’#everyone is an idiot in both places. but one is instantly more volatile#it’s preactically on sight#other social media is mostly being used by me to post my art or talk to irl friends and family#some of those sites are wild. but not in such an instant way#provided you aren’t huge or have some internet hate stalker#my first deviantart account was wild like that. you phrase something awkwardly at the age of 13 and you suddenly have one or two 16ish year#olds stalking you and telling you to Kys and threatening your family#but that was in the old days. haven’t run into that in years#but seriously. whoever those people were. I hope you feel like shit about those past actions#especially because that 13 year old had made art and posts about her depression 😑#and irl bullying#I hope you got better. sincerely. but if not? die#jk. but still#actually. no. if you’re still telling people that sort of thing try it on yourself#i don’t have a twitter. I don’t plan on getting one. but I’ve heard that’s toxic too. but for the brief time I did try it years ago I was#just ignored by most people#I also like websites where you can share other posts with followers but that might be because one of my first socials was facebook#Facebook is still useful for local stuff. but it’s not as anonymous I guess#even on Facebook though it feels somewhat less ‘on sight’ attacking#but gods. the ‘piss poor reading comprehension’ website is so much more comfortable than the ‘dog piled for asking about a plant’ website#and the ‘just block them’ culture is so useful#i make a post on Reddit like ‘anyone know of houseplants that are like this?’ and have some dude downvote me and respond like#‘are we supposed to be your servants’ like dude. just ignore the post if you don’t want to answer the question#and I’m not touching anime subs with a 10ft pole#looked at one once and went ‘never touching that again’
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how to make business plans: spend 2 weeks looking for a website to make a visual plan guide that you can collaborate with business partners, but you end up nowhere because all of them require paid subscriptions to do more than a few basic things. except you don't want to pay for these because you don't have a business yet and therefore no money!!!! but you need more than basic features (basically you can only put 50-100 items on your board with free account and i will definitely need more)
#WHY DOES EVERYTHING ON THE INTERNET HAVE TO BE SUBSCRIPTION NOW#i miss the days where you could use a website and all the features for FREE.#or at best only have one-time fee or subs for advanced stuff only profitable big businesses need and can also afford#the average person is starting to get locked out of the internet. we already pay for the internet itself. everything is too expensive#i need to make my own business so i can afford to live but everything to mae a business costs too much!!!!!!!#im too autistic for this shit. “this shit” being “a profitable member of society”#i cant get a big cool job to make a ton of money and then afford to easily become a millionaire#i bet most millionaires and all billionairs didnt work a day in their life to afford to start their businesses#and if they say they did they lie#lee rambles#i found a free unlimited one but you have to download the program and save everything locally#so it doesn't look like you cam collab with other people which defeats the purpose of what im trying to do 😭#i wanted to use milanote or whatever its called because i liked how you can link separate pages to keep things clear/uncluttered#but i dont want to pay $12 a month i think it was? to put more than 100 items on the boards. that goes so fast#but i might have to use it and just cram things together in a messy fashion to not hit that limit......#you can double the amount by referring people to make an account but still. i hate bekng limited#and being forced to pay to not have limits!!!! let me be free and only pay for advanced stuff i can live without for fuck sake#i dont know what im doing. but im making an attempt to business or something
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if anyone was thinking about making every single parental control attachment for wifi networks explode into dust now would be a great time to do that
#kiwiposts#my mom messed around with her device's settings for Literal Days#trying to get my sister's new phone to Even Function At All#and in the almost a MONTH since my laptop has been randomly (but Most Of The Time-ly) having the restrictions in place#which means nothing from reddit or tumblr loads and sometimes twitter and sometimes even My Email And Bank! Just for fun I guess!#and she refuses to even Look at her settings again when I tell her that she must've accidentally revoked my laptop's exclusion#so I have to live with it for However Long I Have To Live Here I Guess!#I got a VPN so twitter's fine and honestly the slowdown from the VPN is *less* than the slowdown caused by the parental control device#but I can't use it for tumblr b/c doing Anything on tumblr with a VPN gets you shadowbanned at best because Good Website#so!#.#so.#seeing if i can still in-depth edit posts if i were to get the (dreaded) tumblr app#but i also have to update from iOS 15 to 16 in order to even install it which. *incredibly strained groan*
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oof yeah this update is Not Good. i miss seeing all y'all faces
#i'd encourage everyone to send in official feedback#*polite* and direct to the point on telling them exactly why this update is bad#you can contact them by going to settings and then scrolling down to ''help'' then ''contact support'' and then put ''feedback'' in the box#for me that was#1) directly hurts the quick recognition and readability of my dash for who reblogged what and who is currently active and can interact with#2) directly hurts the community feel of the website as now i can't ''see'' who i'm following. avatars are like faces here#and the only faces i can see are those who make content (grand majority of whom i do not follow)#i usually roll pretty well with their ui updates because i don't care that much and i assume they've got their reasons#but this one is absolutely baffling#i do not understand where any upside is to this#even with ''copying'' other social media sites literally no one does it like this#i do not get what it is trying to accomplish#if they don't like the hanging avatars just shift 'em over and put them in line with the rest of the boxes why get rid of them completely?#anyway - please contact staff and don't be a dick about it#i still firmly believe clear concise communication they can use as data points to higher ups is the way to bring about change#sharkneto speaks
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i'm going to a queer school event tomorrow but i'm literally feeling so paranoid about it. what if my mom checks life360 while i'm there, then looks up which event is at that location, and puts the very obvious two and two together. if i put on airplane mode to freeze my location, what if she texts me and freaks out when i don't respond for a good few hours. what if a family friend somehow spots me there and passes the information along. i really wanna go and connect with other queer people here but holy SHIT the thought i could inadvertently out myself simply by taking my phone along is terrifying.
#friday chats#friday vs post-secondary school#see like the school was very nice to put all their events on one webpage for everyone to browse#but alas everyone means Everyone and not just students#why can't it just be like. bye mom and dad see you in a couple weeks when you come up for a football game#and then no contact until then#(i know it's bc they care about me. but Actually what they care about is the idea of me they have in their heads#and if they knew i'm queer they would be Oh So Disappointed In Me. spin their homophobia and betrayal into ''''concern'''' yknow)#i guess if i froze my location i could say i was sleeping in#but if anyone calls me at any point on airplane mode doesn't the phone go straight to voicemail??#suppose i could say my phone was shut off#but like. something something panopticon surveillance something. i feel like i have to look over my shoulder constantly#for the people i'm supposed to feel safest with#and it's fucked up! it's fucked up and i hate it#(also i mention her looking up the event bc she has used that website to show me things there is to do. i Know she knows it exists#and that she's looked at it. and she's obviously invested in whether her baby girl is alright or not.#first kid to go off to college problems 👍)#the last example is the most unlikely though. a friend of MY parents?? at a QUEER event??? unheard of.#but idk i'm still scared#so that's. fun.#fuck wait actually i don't know how to get there without gps#i'll look up the route beforehand and try to remember it. shit man.
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Gifted kid discussion is odd to us because people get caught up in defining what gifted means not realizing that the root problem is there are a set of people who view themselves as above others even if they claim to be in our community. The fact this is even a distinction people care about still is very shallow to us. We think if a person even considers themselves a gifted student there’s something slightly twisted in their view. Why do people feel this need to define themselves as above? And to be clear labeling yourself as a failure student is much different than gifted. In that regard you are acknowledging you are considered “less than”, that you are not of the set standards in education. I think the reason gifted kid discussion always leaves me perturbed is that people still hold on to the fact they were “gifted”. It’s weird. It’s uncomfortable from the pov of a student like us who could hardly read up into high school.
#it’s weird to us people try to push back on this and say ‘well I was in higher classes but I wasn’t like thaaat different’ not acknowledging#that there was a specific system in place which put students like us down#we don’t care if classes were actually easy or if gifted students weren’t actually smart#we care about the fact there’s still even a want to make this distinction#we don’t like when peers get close with us nd joke around about school when they’re an ap student. we were not. we were punished for#existing.#do not lump us in with you.#we don’t consider ourself stupid . we think we’re quite capable. even then that still wouldn’t define us#people are people beyond this#this website is the gifted kid site though so 🤷#….and yet people constantly claim to not know anything as an excuse#it’s kind of mind boggling
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trying to write, i want to write but the only place i have with dark mode is my computer's notepad and i can't access those files from anywhere else. augh
#just me hi#girl help my Eyeyessseses hbfvhs#i keep getting told 'use google docs' it Hurts My Eyeballs !!! let me change the funkin website theme !!!#plus when i'm writing at night i don't want the whole world knowing what's up bc i have the equivalent of a lighthouse beacon telling every#one 'HEY. THIS THING'S AWAKE !!' lol :^#i'd use google keep bc it feels. friendlier ? but also the clutter behind the note i'm writing in is making me anxious + distracting me. so#hvfbhs#this is such a silly problem but i'm running in circles just trying to rewrite p.space for the... i think eighth or ninth time now Lolll#i wanted to try wattpad again but i like not having my eyes hurt. and i'm trying to plan ahead bc i want to have a place i can write in#Consistently. ya know ?#sigh. sogh. saigh. sygh#oh and also wattpad feels too cluttered. there's something about having the writing space take up the Whole Entire Screen that doesn't#groove with my brain right. so !#this is just me being very picky for no good reason lolll :)#'just minimize the tab then' but that is still wrong bc the writing space is taking up the Entire Tab now !!#/anyway i just remembered rn why i don't explain why i'm actually having issues with things HFBVSH#it's really specific. and really vibe-based. and it's like being in the middle of a field and not being able to explain what is so wrong ab#being in the empty‚ cold‚ deadly-quiet but also piercing-loud field forever and ever and ever#do you know what i mean ??#//ANYWAY. back to whatever this problem is Lolll :3
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