#still can't believe these are the same person

[phantomspren]

I was just going to put this in tags but I'll put it here.

This is why I'm uncomfortable when people make sweeping generalizations about conservatives/Republicans.

On a fundamental level, I do disagree with the political beliefs that lead people to holding those labels.

But at the same time, there's such a huge difference between someone who is Republican because they think that we should have lower taxes, and someone who is Republican because they think rich white men are the only people worthy of rights.

When we make those blanket statements of "every Republican is racist" or whatever, we're making it less likely that those people are going to do stuff like this. Often it leads to people doubling down on their beliefs, even if they are inherently harmful.

You also have people like my mom. She is a registered Republican, born and raised in Idaho, super super Mormon.

She's a registered Republican because she thinks that society should be built to promote the family and help families thrive.

But she also supports universal healthcare.

I tell her all the things I think are cool about Harris and Walz and she's always like "wow, yeah, that is really cool!"

She's a high school teacher and because of that now supports gun control.

She doesn't give a shit that I'm aroace. (Haven't talked about gender stuff but I'd feel pretty comfortable bringing it up at this point to be honest.)

The thing is that the public/left awareness of the Republican party has shifted, following the people who are in power. Because those in power are getting more extreme.

There are people who have always held really extreme right-wing beliefs.

There are people like many who are voting for Trump who used to be less extreme, but have followed those in positions in power in gradually making their views more extreme.

There are those like my mom and dad who have some not great but far more reasonable beliefs who feel like the Republican party no longer represent them.

It's important to talk about those problematic beliefs that people like my parents hold, but at the end of the day they are genuinely good people. They've got internalized racism and homophobia and misogyny just like everyone else, but they're still good people.

Honestly even most hardcore Trump supporters are good people. (My grandparents voted for him! They're some of the kindest people I know!)

But if we just throw everyone under the label of "Republican" and then assume that includes things like homophobe, white supremacist, etc, you're going to end up with a lot of people who don't want to get behind what you're behind.

It's so much better, in my experience, to build a report, built trust, try to genuinely understand where the other person is coming from. I've talked to my Trump voting grandparents about trans people and they listened to me. I may not have changed their minds, but they have at least seen that other side from someone they respect.

That's going to go a whole lot more good in the long run than just calling them Republican and never talking to them again.

Of course there's more nuance than this, and if someone has like genuine beliefs that. Really really not great. Dump their ass. It's not worth it. There's a difference between someone who's a white supremacist because that's what they deeply believe, and someone who's just parroting what they saw elsewhere. The later deserve time and understanding, because they have the potential to turn into the former but aren't there yet.

And of course there are people like my mom. If she took a political compass quiz it would tell her she's liberal, hands down. Still a registered Republican.

Anyways, these are thoughts I've had for a bit and maybe I'll write something later that's a bit more planned out. Hope that makes sense.

And there's just a ton of nuance here that I can't get into because I've almost hit my time limit on Tumblr and I need to go take an exam. Plus it's dumb to expect me to elaborate on every possible way this could be misinterpreted. Just assume I kinda know what I'm talking about please, unless I accidentally said something blatantly incorrect. O7

Please vote tomorrow.

Be compassionate.

Imagine those around you complexly.

Think about my mom. :p

Have a cat picture for the road.

i'm a huge fan of Republicans, conservatives or however you want to be politically labeled choosing country over party. please let me see more stories. it's a brave thing to do this. even if you voted for him in both 2016 & 2020 but you changed your mind now, WELCOME. it's a massive deal to get out of any cult successfully & MAGA is no different. being filled with anger & hatred, & fear is intoxicating & honestly easier than choosing to do the right thing. i'm glad you saw the light.

check your registration status often & don't stop talking about Project 2025. they can pretend they're distancing themselves from it as much as they want but it's absolutely their policy. we can do this though if we just show up & VOTE. we got this 💙

[bambii-bimbo]

Takeover

Alex had heard rumors of Bambi Sleep, how anyone who listened was feminized and turned into a brainless bimbo doll. Completely brainwashed to be a pretty, dumb girl, mindless and obedient. He scoffed at the idea, Bambi Sleep? An audio playlist couldn't possibly have so much of an effect on someone, right? Clicking play on the first file, Alex laid back, letting the trance tone fill his mind and closing his eyes. After listening for about 30 minutes, Alex turned off the file. He felt the exact same! Of course a simple hypnosis file can't alter a person's mind, nevertheless their body. Over the next few days, Alex experimented a bit more with the files, digging a bit further every time he clicked play. Alex still refused to believe that these files could change him in the slightest, listening out of spite to prove the rumors he had heard wrong. After a week of listening to the files, Alex had a daily routine of listening before bed, letting himself drift off to sleep with his headphones still on. Alex barely even noticed how the files were beginning to take root, the conditioning slowly weaving itself into his head, changing him from the inside. Alex could no longer remember anything after 5 minutes of listening to Bambi. He didn't mind, he enjoyed the feelings the files brought him. Not that it was having any effect on him, of course, but the hours and hours of listening were adding up.

Before long, Alex couldn't wait to get home and put on his files, to which he would go to bed as early as possible to let him listen longer. He started listening in the morning, at work, whenever he could to listen to his files. Any thought that he had of stopping once he proved the files didn't work were completely wiped away, replaced with soft undertones of happiness and bliss that Alex felt, letting himself sink into the files. A type of bliss that nothing else could recreate, only Bambi and Bambi alone. The files made him feel good, losing himself in the conditioning and letting Bambi take control, more and more. He started listening to files he couldn't fathom when he had started, accepting trance easier every session. Mind constantly being drained of thoughts, reprogrammed to accept further brainwashing and let Bambi take more and more control. Alex couldn't bother, all he cared about was how good he felt, obeying his files, surrendering his mind and letting Bambi change it. In fact, these changes were becoming more and more apparent every day. Alex began admiring female models, their curves, their perfect faces and posture. Feeling more feminine every day, adopting a good skincare routine and softening his once masculine features. At this point, Alex was listening to Bambi all day, constantly at edge whenever his files weren't dousing his mind in the soft, pink, fluffy energy that made him feel like such a good, good girl. Wait, girl? Alex caught himself, kneeling in front of his mirror, repeating his newly given mantras as he drooled over his chin, a puddle of saliva growing on the ground. Alex nearly took off the headphones, until he heard that command, that wonderful command that he loved so much. "Bambi Sleep". Instantly, all resistance he had dissipated, and his mind was wiped completely. Alex went right back to reciting his mantras, hearing the voice softly coo "let your mind slip", staring into nothingness and absorbing his brainwashing. He was such a good girl, letting Bambi take full control and dropping even deeper into trance.

Waking up the next morning, Alex, back to himself, leapt to his feet and tried to keep Bambi out of his head, avoiding his headphones and phone all day. But the more he fought it, the more useless the fight became. Why resist, why not just give in and accept the brainwashing, becoming a perfect, bimbofied puppet for Bambi? Alex's body betrayed him, slipping his now pink headphones (when did he buy those?) over his head, clicking play on his files, instantly losing all resistance in favor of the warm, submissive bliss from giving in. What a good girl Alex was, fleeing back to the comfort and emptiness that Bambi brought him, realizing how easy, so easy it was to just give in and let the brainwashing win. Alex went completely limp, his old self fading into the background and truly letting Bambi take full control for once and for all, waking up as a blank, ditzy, horny doll, so well conditioned to obey and live a life dedicated to Bambi.

[simplyraeblue]

hunter and hunted (jjk)

college (summer) break au: a fic in which y/n is pining over Yuji's older brother Sukuna, while unbeknownst to her, Choso is doing the same thing for her. contents: sukuna x reader, choso x reader, modern college AU, yuji and choso are brothers, sukuna and yuji are brothers, smut warning, fem reader

chapter warnings/tags: mild angst, swearing, filthy raunchy smut, oral (reader receiving), squirting, p in v, creampie, i was diabolic writing this, choso's an oral god, use of "angel" A/N: oh my god I can't believe we've come to the end... how? how how how? it feels like just yesterday I started this hot mess of a fanfic and now it's complete. if you hated it; sucks for you. if you loved it; thank you so much. THANK YOU to all who have commented, reblogged, and showed continous support for this mini series! ദ്ദി(ó﹏ò｡) i love you all so much muah muah MUAH! I've got a little treat in store at the end of this for you, so stay tuned!

index part fourteen | the end no more sorry

master list

part fifteen word count : 5,764 (+ 635 in bonus content)

two months later

school was in full swing again, and the weather was shifting; sandals were swapped for boots, and ball caps into beanies. students flooded the campus in heavy coats, clutching their textbooks, but not everyone could adapt to the change.

your breath formed a fog in front of you as you hurried through campus, realizing you were late. oh so fucking late. Yuji was already waiting for you at the library, ready to scold you for neglecting your studies – though really it would be Megumi doing the actual scolding.

your phone buzzed in your pocket, and as you pulled it out to check the message, you let out a frustrated sigh. of course, Nobara was skipping the study session. she always preferred wild Thursday nights to hitting the books. honestly, you kind of wished you had done the same. 

after rushing (silently) through the library, you finally spotted Yuji and Megumi in a study room. you pushed through the door and immediately felt Megumi’s disapproving gaze. “you’re late.” he said with a tut.

Yuji groaned, sliding him a small bill, and your jaw dropped. “you bet on whether I’d be late?” you asked, setting your things down a bit harder than necessary.

“not if you’d be late, but how late.” Yuji clarified as you took a seat. you quickly flipped open your textbook, trying to catch up to where they were while both of them just stared at you. 

you glared at them, eyebrows furrowed. “what? you’re looking at me like I committed a crime by being late.” 

“we were just wondering…” Yuji started.

“…if you wanted to skip studying and join Nobara.” Megumi finished.

you gasped. “Megumi Fushiguro, you want to party instead of study? what has gotten into you?”

Megumi rolled his eyes, but there was a hint of amusement in his expression. “don’t act so surprised. you know how important studying is to me, but even we need a break sometimes.”

you crossed your arms, pretending to be annoyed. “sure, but you’re the last person I expected to suggest ditching our study session. what’s next, are you going to start dancing at parties?” 

Yuji chuckled, nudging Megumi playfully. “hey, maybe we could both use some fun. besides, Nobara always knows how to make things exciting. it could be a nice change of pace.”

you hesitated, glancing back at your textbook, then at their eager faces. “but what about grades?” pfft yeah right.

“they’ll still be there when we get back.” Megumi said, his tone surprisingly persuasive. “just one night won’t hurt.”

you took a deep breath, weighing your options. part of you wanted to dive into your studies, but the thought of a spontaneous night out with friends was tempting. finally, you sighed, a smile creeping onto your face. “alright, but only for a little while! we’ll come back and study after.”

“no we won’t!” Yuji joked as he patted Megumi’s back and stood from his chair. 

so now, here you were, three shots deep into a bar with your friends. “I can’t believe you convinced Megumi to come out!” Nobara shouted over the music, arm slung around your shoulder. 

“actually, it was his idea!” you responded with a grin. everyone was surprised, truly, but you weren’t complaining. 

the last two months had been nothing short of dreary, and you didn’t mean the weather. 

moving out of Yuji’s house had been the right choice. it felt like you could finally breathe again, even though each breath still carried a twinge of pain in your heart. while you were relieved to escape the heavy tension between Sukuna and Choso, you missed the latter with every fiber of your being. 

it wasn’t for lack of effort on his side. for the first month, Choso had begged Yuji for your address, but found that his brother was under strict orders not to share it. he called and texted constantly, yet you couldn’t bring yourself to respond to any of it.

you were determined to stick to the belief that he would find someone better without you. 

Sukuna, on the other hand, had been much more persistent. by the third week of living in your new apartment, he showed up on your doorstep. despite your protests, he somehow ended up on your couch, enduring nearly an hour of your yelling. 

in the end, he accepted defeat. you vividly remember the relief you felt when Sukuna asked, “can we just be friends?” 

friends. yes, you could manage that. any feelings you had for Sukuna had faded away during your relationship with Choso, and while you hadn’t fully realized it at the time, you were sure of it now. 

now here you were, being nagged by both Yuji and Sukuna, urging you to reach out to Choso. how had you gone from hating the eldest brother to listening to him go on about how you’d made the biggest mistake?

“do you realize how this has affected him?” Sukuna asked one night over a pint of beer at a pub. “while I could drown out my heartbreak-“

“oh, sure.” you rolled your eyes.

“-excuse me. get over my bruised ego, then.” Sukuna smirked at your reaction, though he meant what he said. he understood now wasn’t the right moment to delve deeper. “I could go out, pick up a woman at the bar, and bring her home. Choso, though? he hasn’t done any of that. I haven’t seen him talk to a woman once.”

“yeah, right. Choso could walk down the street and charm any girl.” you joked, but the thought made your stomach churn.

Sukuna chuckled. “doesn’t matter. he’s barely left his room.”

“oh.” was all you could manage.

since that day, the calls and texts from Choso had stopped. whether he had given up or found happiness elsewhere, you chose not to think about it.

instead, you decided to spend tonight drowning your feelings with Nobara, Megumi and Yuji. no thinking of Choso, no thinking of Choso, you repeated the mantra over and over just as you’d done over the past two months.

Nobara spent half the night shoving you gently in the direction of other men, trying to get you to flirt and have fun. no matter how many times you tried to dissuade her, she kept telling you that it was time to move on. but even when a guy would be trying to sweet talk you, you kept having to shake away images of those twin black buns and tattoo striped across the nose. how could anyone compare?

Yuji and Megumi tried to lift your spirits as well by forcing you to dance with them. but eventually, their sweet romantics would make you feel even worse, to no fault of their own. you were just remembering the night Choso saved you from that creepy guy in a bar. 

“Yuji…” you whined, leaning heavily against the bar with your head in your hands. the music blared around you as Nobara tried to slide another drink your way, but you waved it off, no longer in the mood. “did I really fuck up? just be honest with me.”

Yuji offered a sympathetic pat on your head, a gesture that only irritated you more. he’d taken to doing it since your breakup; it made you feel like a helpless child, vulnerable and lost. “I think you did what was best for you.” he said softly, but the words felt hollow and you could see past the fake bullshit he was spewing. 

“but… I don’t know anymore.” you really didn’t. the weight of uncertainty settled in your chest. moving out had felt like the right choice, but breaking things off with Choso? that was a different story. “I just really miss him.

“then why haven’t you talked to him?” Megumi interjected, his expression neutral as if he were presenting the most logical solution in the world.

“I can’t. he’s better off without a brother-fucking girlfriend.” 

“I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that.” Yuji grimaced, shaking his head at your remark. the thought of you being… intimate with either of his brothers still made him a little queasy. after a moment, he leaned in closer. “he’s not better off without you. trust me, I know my brother. he might act like he’s fine, but he’s a complete mess without you. his music’s gotten louder – like he’s trying to drown out the silence – and he spends all his time in the dark in his room. I haven’t heard him touch his xbox in weeks. he’s just… an empty shell now. honestly, he’s even more emo than before, if that’s even possible.”

maybe Yuji was right. maybe you hadn’t necessarily made the wrong choice at the time, but the long-term effects felt crushing. you wanted Choso to be happy, that was why you left. if you were happy, great. if Choso was happy, even better. as you often reminded yourself, it was with or without you. but the idea of him suffering made your heart ache. 

“I just keep thinking about the good times.” you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper. “I remember how he used to smile when I’d surprise him with his favorite snacks, or how he’d get lost in his music for hours. it’s like I can still hear him playing those songs in my head.”

Yuji watched you closely, his expression softening. “but it’s not just about you and him any more, it’s about what you both need. sometimes love means taking a step back, even if it hurts.”

“I thought I was doing the right thing.” you said, feeling the sting of tears threatening to spill over. “but now it just feels… empty. I thought I’d feel better, but I don’t.”

Nobara returned with yet another full drink, her eyes flickering between you and Yuji. she placed it in front of you, but you just stared at it, not ready to take another sip but not pushing it away either. “you can’t keep punishing yourself for wanting what’s best for both of you.” she said, her tone more supportive than judgmental. “I don’t see why you can’t just talk to him.”

“but what if he doesn’t want to talk to me? what if I end up just making things worse?” the anxiety twisted in your stomach, each possibility feeling heavier than the last.

Yuji suddenly placed both hands on your face, squeezing slightly to get you to turn and focus on him. “listen, you are my best friend in the world – sorry Nobara – and you deserve to be happy. I won’t sit here and listen to you agonize over whether you made the right choice. obviously, if it still bothers you, then you didn’t. I can say with certainty that Choso would want to talk to you, he’d probably cry if he got the chance for one minute to see you. so, get off your ass and talk to him.”

Nobara and Megumi’s jaws dropped, and you could only nod in shock. “I’ve never seen Yuji be so firm.” Nobara muttered to Megumi.

“I know, it’s hot.” Megumi felt the sharp jab of Nobara’s elbow in his side, causing him to chuckle.

finally, after your little pep talk from Yuji, you were stumbling back to your apartment alone, and all you wanted was to think about Choso. what was he doing right about now? was he blaring music through the speakers in his room? maybe he was playing video games or watching a movie. Yuji had said he wasn’t doing any of that, but you could only hope for the best.

you grew nauseous at the thought of him with anyone else tonight.

as you dug for your keys in your purse, you tripped over something right outside your door. fuck, had someone’s food delivery got sent to the wrong address again? “oi, what the hell?” you grumbled as you looked up from your purse, only to stop breathing.

Choso shot up from the ground, buns tousled and eyes puffy. he opened and closed his mouth, struggling to find even a simple “hello” only to give up and shut his lips tightly.

“what are you doing here?” you asked, your voice trembling as your palms grew clammy at the sight of him. your heart raced in your chest, aching for him.

“I had to… I needed to…” Choso stammered, caught off guard that you were speaking to him. he hadn’t expected to run into you; he thought he’d just swing by and maybe catch of a glimpse of you if luck was on his side. “I don’t know what to say now that you’re right here.”

you couldn’t help but chuckle, unfazed by his awkwardness. “do you want to come in?” you slid your key into the door, and Choso nodded firmly. 

maybe it was the alcohol, or just the shock of seeing him after two months apart, but your resolve was slipping.

he followed you inside, mentally letting out a sigh of relief at just being able to speak with you. Choso had begged Yuji every day for even the smallest hint of your new address. to his surprise, it was Sukuna who finally let it slip.

you moved to the kitchen, trying to give Choso a moment to gather himself. “can I get you something to drink?” you asked, glancing back at him.

he shook his head, still looking a bit shell-shocked. “I just… I didn’t think I’d actually see you.”

you turned to face him full, leaning against the counter. “why did you come, then?”

Choso took a deep breath, his gaze dropping to the floor. “I can’t stop. I can’t stop thinking about you, about everything that happened between us. I can’t move on from you.

“Choso…” you whispered, your heart sinking at his words.

he stepped closer, his hand reaching out but hesitating halfway, as if unsure of how to bridge the gap between you. “I can’t move on from us.” he continued, his voice trembling slightly. “I’ll never be able to move on from you.” his hand slowly moved until it rested just above yours on the counter. “I think…” he took a breath, and the vulnerability in his eyes made your heart race. “I think I’ll love you forever.”

your resolve crumbled, scattered like leaves in the wind, as the warmth of his presence enveloped you. “I think… I’ll love you forever too.” you confessed, the words spilling out before you could hold them back.

Choso’s expression shifted, a longing flickering across his face as he fought the urge to pull you into his arms. he wanted nothing more than to kiss you, to hold onto you tightly and never let go, but he held back, willing to let you lead the way. if you wanted him to leave, he would do it, even if it meant breaking his heart all over again.

but standing so close, you felt that pull to him that was impossible to ignore. you didn’t know if you’d regret it, but your body was responding to his proximity, urging you to bridge the gap. “are you going to kiss me now?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper. 

Choso’s breath caught at your question, his eyes widening with surprise and a flicker of hope. “is that what you want?” he asked, searching your face for any sign of hesitation. 

you nodded, a nervous excitement fluttering in your stomach. “yes.”

that seemed to break whatever restraint he had left. in an instant, he closed the gap, cupping your face gently with his hand as he leaned in. his lips brushed against yours softly at first, as if testing the waters. the kiss was tentative, filled with months of longing, but it quickly deepened, igniting a warmth that spread through you both.

you melted into him, your hands finding their way to his shoulders, pulling him closer. it felt like coming home after a long trip – a familiar warmth that wrapped around your heart.

Choso broke apart from you, breathless, as he rested his forehead against yours. his eyes searched yours, looking for something within them. “this can’t… I can’t handle it if this is just a one-night stand.” he murmured, breath warm on your face. 

you shook your head against him, a small smile forming across your face. “I don’t think I can let you go again.” as you whispered the reassurance, Choso groaned out in relief before pressing his lips to yours again.

where the first kiss had been cautious, patient, his lips now moved against yours with a fervent need to feel every inch of you. Choso’s tongue dipped past your lips to tenderly caress yours as he pulled you closer into him, heaving chests flush together as your hands fisted the back of his shirt. 

“angel…” he moaned lowly, his teeth nipping at your bottom lip as you panted into his mouth. you felt like you were on fire, his hands leaving trails of flame on your body while they roamed and grabbed at whatever he could get his hands on. “I missed you so much.”

“I missed you too.” you whimpered as his lips found purchase between your neck and jaw. he peppered kisses along your skin before you felt his teeth bite into you before sucking a mark. “missed you s’ much.”

the two of you became a tangle of limbs as he tugged you toward your bed, so conveniently close in your studio, until your legs hit the bed and you both tumbled backward onto the mattress. Choso landed on top of you with a thud, causing you to let out a laugh with the extra weight. 

“somethin’ funny?” Choso asked with a grin as he tucked a strand of your hair behind your ear. “I missed that laugh. thought I’d never hear it again.”

looking up at him, your heart raced, urging you to speak before thinking. he was so beautiful, watching you with a love-filled gaze, that you couldn’t help but melt under him. “I love you, Choso.” the words slipped out softly from your lips but you had no regrets – you did love him, with your whole heart.

Choso’s eyes went wide, shining so bright that you were blinded by the emotion pouring out from his expression. he was shattered when you’d left. you’d taken the sunshine with you, leaving him to hole up in the darkness of his broken heart. but with those three words, you’d started to piece him back together. 

his lips crashed into yours, teeth clattering together with the force of it, as his eyelids fluttered close with furrowed brows. “I….” he started between your lips “… love…” a nip at your tongue “… you.” 

nothing was holding him back anymore from pulling his shirt over his head with one fluid motion, before latching his lips onto your neck and dragging out the sweet little moans he loved from your mouth as he marked you with his teeth. he’d heard them in his dreams, through his blaring music, every day he heard your voice, and now he wanted to make sure he’d hear it until he went deaf.

Choso trailed kisses down to your collarbone before pulling your shirt off and then unclasping the back of your bra. needy lips found your perked nipples, latching on roughly as he sucked one into his mouth. he made sure to leave bruising red marks on the plushest part of your tits as well – just in case the one on your neck hadn’t taken. this skin was softer, easier to brutally bite and suck, dragging the most incredible noises he’d ever heard from you. with every scratch of his teeth against your skin, you moaned out in a mix of pain-pleasure, and your pulse raced under his touch, shivers running through your bones as he continued his path down to the hem of your pants. 

it felt like the first time all over again; the need and desire taking over both of you. he was relentless with his hands dragging over your body, scratching and gripping everywhere they paused. but his hands would only pause for a moment, before moving on to somewhere else, desperately aching to touch you, feel you, taste you. 

“wan’ t’… need t’ taste you, angel.” he murmured against your skin as his fingers worked apart the button, then the zipper, ultimately forcing the pants down your legs and ripping them from your ankles to toss them somewhere on the floor. he had a one-track mind right now – tasting your sweet cunt on his tongue. “miss the taste of you, been goin’ through withdrawals.”

your face flushed at the filthy words babbling from his lips as he kissed your inner things, making sure to leave bite marks there too. “Choso, that’s so gross baby.” you whined in embarrassment and tried to shut your thighs, only to have them forced open by his hands pushing your knees apart.  “it’s not that great, I’m sure.”

Choso looked up from where his chin was nestled between you, eyes half-lidded as if he was drunk off you already. “it is that great, it’s perfect. could do this all day if you’d let me.” and with that, he licked a stripe up your already slick folds and let out an animalistic groan at the taste. “s’ good, tastes s’ good angel. can’t get enough.”

as he began to eat you like a man starved, spit and arousal coating his mouth and chin, glistening over his face tattoo you loved so much, you fisted his dark hair in your hand at the overwhelming pleasure he was giving you. it had been so long – too long – and you were overly sensitive to every nudge of his nose against your clit as he pressed his face deep into your core.

“Cho, s’ too much.” you whimpered when he plunged a single-digit knuckle deep into your warm walls and curled it into your g-spot. your hips instinctively bucked against his mouth, and he let out a pleased hum at your reaction. 

he pulled his mouth away from your clit with a plop! and smirked up at you through his lashes. “feelin’ good, angel?” he asked, but he could feel the answer on his fingers as he stuffed another one deep into you. your gushy walls were as tight as his pants were around his constrained throbbing cock, no doubt already leaking with pre-cum at the sight of you coming undone from his tongue. “wan’ you t’ cum on me, need t’ taste it before I get inside you.”

“please – hah – please wanna cum s’ bad!” your moans were pornographic at this point as the hot knot in your abdomen tightened into a coil ready to be snapped. as you practically rode his tongue to chase your release, Choso’s eyes rolled to the back of his head at the addictive taste of your cunt, deciding that if he died with his head between your legs and your cum on his tongue, it would be the perfect end to his life. 

“that’s it, cum f’ me ‘kay?” Choso urged before his tongue caressed your clit in circular motions while his fingers curled against your g-spot just right. your orgasm came crashing through you, two months’ worth of pent-up need for him and only him coursing through your bones as you came on his face with wild thrashes of your hips. 

he had to wrap his arm over your hips, forcing them to be still as he didn’t give up his pursuit of the most spectacular orgasm he could give you. even though your body felt like it was on fire, he was unyielding in his torment on your sensitive clit. you were still coming, screaming his name as you tried to scramble away from him in a desperate attempt to escape the overstimulation, but he kept you pinned in place with his bicep, growling into your dripping heat every time you tried to move.

“s-stop, ‘s too much!” you yelped as he continued scissoring his fingers inside of you, forcing open the tightness of your walls as he slurped your clit into his mouth and sucked repetitively. you were going to explode, maybe even die with every wave of release that just kept crashing, the warmth tingling through your body traveling down down down until you felt like a dam had burst, and you heard the squelches of your cunt squirting all over him.

Choso was ecstatic, and absolutely feral to feel your pussy juices spray onto his face and coating his tongue. you tasted heavenly, his cock twitching at the sight of you writhing at his touch – he wanted to lap up every bit of you, but even then, he knew his need wouldn’t be fulfilled.

just as you were coming down, body still twitching with overstimulation, Choso stood up and shoved his pants down to reveal his leaking dick, red and irritated from the confines of his pants, ready to feel you wrap around him. “please, need you to fuck me, Choso.” you begged as you reached for him, wanting him inside of you this instant or else you’d implode. 

“don’t worry, gonna make you feel real good again, baby.” Choso pumped his cock with the same hand that was coated in your release before lining up his tip with your cunt. he kissed your lips, and you tasted yourself on his tongue. of course, he’d never wipe his face of your delicious juices. “missed this s’ much, been dreaming ‘bout it every day.”

with one deep, steady thrust, Choso bullied his dick through your wet walls and bottomed out, balls deep within you and letting out the loudest groan you’d ever heard come from his lips. you gasped at the fullness, somehow forgetting just how large he was when he was pressed against your cervix and filling you so deliciously. he took no time in rolling his hips into yours without pause, ready to feel every inch of you coating his cock. 

“fuck, Choso it’s been too long.” you gasped as his tip continuously kissed your cervix, loud and wet squelches coming from your cunt with every thrust he drove into you. your hips bucked to meet him, need, desperate for him to keep going keep going keep going. without a doubt, you’d be sore and achy tomorrow, but you couldn’t give two shits as long as he was fucking you this good. 

your name was a panted-out prayer on his lips as his hands cupped your face to look at you while he fucked into you, primal instinct taking over and urging him to fill you with his cum over and over. every ignored ache of his cock from the past two months had built up to this, and he wasn’t going to let it go to waste. no, he’d pull more orgasms from your pretty cunt, and fill you up over and over until you could never forget the feeling of him.

 “shit – hmph – missed feeling your cunt wrapped around me. look at you, so pretty underneath me, like my own personal angel.” Choso murmured through his pants as his thrust became sloppier. to compensate for his lack of control and quickly oncoming orgasm, he slid his hand down, fingers pressing against your clit in slow, deliberate circles to get you to cum on his cock. 

as the knot began to tighten in your stomach again, your eyes snapped open to look at Choso above you – black hair already sticking to his forehead, twin buns coming loose, pupils blown out from pleasure, and mouth agape as he watched you move underneath him. “I love you.” you whined, turning your head and softly kissing his hand that was against your cheek. “holy shit, I love you!”

at your confession, Choso’s pace on your clit picked up and brought you over the edge, your second release racking your body as you trembled beneath him through it. he could not only feel it, but he could hear it too. your warm walls clenched around him like a vice, lewd wet squelches echoing with every thrust of his cock, and your slutty moans of his name had him crumbling. god, you were perfect to him, so soft and pretty and you felt. so. fucking. good. 

he felt like an animal, rutting into you with all of his strength to get himself off, desperate to release himself inside of you. his orgasm found him as you were halfway through yours, and he groaned out, “I love you!” before smashing his lips into yours as his hips stilled to be as deep as he could inside of you, spirts of his hot cum coating your walls as he shuddered on top of you. “I love you I love you I love you!”

he fucked you through both of your orgasms before crashing down on top of you, head buried in the crook of your neck as you both struggled to catch your breath and come down from the high. “I love you, Choso.” you whispered now, brushing his bangs from his sweaty forehead and kissing him. 

“I love you, angel. forever.” Choso murmured back in response, a soft smile taking over his wet lips as he nuzzled closer to you, breathing in deeply through his nose against your skin. “never gonna stop loving you.”

“that’s okay with me.” 

-

it was Christmas time now, fresh white snow coating the ground as you hurried down the sidewalk. you were late, oh so late, again. you could already picture Megumi’s disapproving glare, and you almost lost your footing on a particularly slick patch of ice at the thought.

when you finally burst through Yuji’s front door, panting and flushed from the cold, Megumi gave you the expected side-eye. but then Yuji bounded over, a huge grin on his face. “you made it! thank goodness. if I had to deal with mr. grinch for one more minute, I might’ve pulled my hair out. and I like my hair – everyone likes my hair!” he rambled on, tugging you in the living room and practically forcing you to sit on the couch beside Megumi.

“who’s the grinch this year? Megumi?” you asked playfully, a teasing grin spreading across your face as you glanced at the raven-haired boy. you then turned your attention to the other side of the room. “or is it Sukuna?”

Sukuna, lounging comfortably in an accent chair with a mug that you guessed was filled with heavily spiked eggnog, shook his head and let out a low chuckle. “take another wild guess.”

you raised an eyebrow, confused, until Choso rounded the corner wearing the most hideous Christmas sweater you’d ever laid eyes on. the sight nearly made you gasp. “oh my god.” you breathed, struggling to stifle your laughter.

“don’t. say. a fucking. word.” Choso grumbled, shooting a pointed glare at Yuji who was wearing a matching outrageous sweater.

“you look so cute!” you exclaimed, unable to contain yourself. you jumped off the couch and rushed over to him, planting a fat kiss on his lips. “I’ve never seen you wear so many colors!”

Choso’s face turned pink as his gaze dropped to the enormous, puffy reindeer on the front of the sweater. “you like it?” he asked quietly, a hint of shyness creeping into his voice as he rubbed the back of his neck. 

“I love it.” you replied sincerely, and when he looked back up at you, a radiant smile broke across his face. “and I love the man wearing it even more.”

“of course, when his girlfriend shows up, he’s no longer a grouch.” Yuji huffed, arms crossed and feigning annoyance as he watched the exchange between his brother and you.

“you know you love it.” Megumi teased, wrapping his arms around Yuji’s shoulders and planting a soft kiss on his temple, a playful smirk on his face.

“I think I’m going to be sick.” Sukuna declared, pinching the bridge of his nose in exaggerated annoyance before taking a long gulp from his mug.

you settled back onto the couch, still riding the high of Choso’s blush, when he reached into the pile of gifts stacked beneath the tree. his eyes sparkled with excitement as he pulled out a small, wrapped box with a red bow on top.

“for you.” he said, a shy smile spreading across his face as he handed it to you. “Nobara helped me pick it out, so I can’t take all the credit. she also threatened me to make sure I told you that.”

you snorted out a laugh and took the box from him. you carefully peeled off the wrapping to see a small velvety box hidden underneath, and your breath caught in your throat as you opened it. inside lay a delicate, silver necklace featuring a mountain with two stars atop it. 

“Choso, it’s beautiful!” you gasped, tears pricking your eyes as your fingers brushed over it.

he smiled and gently took the necklace from the box. “while it’s not wall climbing, I thought it would remind you of our first date… and, well, us being the two stars. since… y’know, we went climbing, even though we didn’t do it on a mountain and -”

you looked up, meeting his gaze and causing him to pause his rambles at your expression, and felt hot tears freely sliding down your cheeks at the sweetness of it all. “it’s perfect. I love it.” Choso softly smiled before leaning closer and carefully helping you clasp the necklace around your neck. the pendant settled just above where your heart raced beneath your skin.

Yuji and Megumi exchanged knowing glances, and Yuji elbowed Megumi playfully. “look at you two, all sweet and mushy… makes me sick.” Megumi teased with a tiny smirk.

“I’m sick of all of you.” Sukuna grumbled from his spot, but beneath the mug pressed to his lips, you could see his mouth curving up into a small smile.

Choso’s cheeks flushed again, but he didn’t take his eyes off you. “I just wanted to give you something special.” he said quietly, the sincerity in his voice making you melt. “I love you so much, angel.”

you sniffled slightly, reaching up to touch the necklace that you knew would never be taken off. “I love you too, Choso.” you replied before placing a soft kiss to his lips. 

in that moment, everything felt perfect. you were in love, surrounded by some of the people that you cared about the most on the holidays. and for now, you knew that everything would be okay – more than okay.

-

-

-

-

Sukuna’s POV

months later

he’d never say it to anyone else, but Sukuna’s therapist knows damn well to take the secret to their grave. sure, he’d been in love with you, or some semblance of love at least. so forgive him for being a tad heartbroken that he wasn’t the one chosen after everything.

his therapist had told him not to ruminate over it, that he had sought forgiveness and worked towards being a better person. but had he truly? he’d spent the better part of the cold season getting over it, and while he ultimately had, he was still nagged by the dread of never finding someone to look at him that way again. 

he was happy that everyone else was happy. he’d royally fucked up, he knew that, and he deserved to not be the one chosen in the end. all he could do now was move forward and continue trying. 

try try try. 

it was the mantra he’d carried into the new year, seared in his brain every second of every day. it’s all he ever did nowadays.

well, that and drink himself into a drunken stupor whenever he got the chance. and tonight was no exception – having ditched Yuji’s little party at the house to escape the suffocating romance between everyone but him, he found himself at a quiet bar two pints in, desperately hoping for a mild buzz at least.

he felt like a pitiful fool, drinking away his feelings. this wasn’t like him, or it used to not be. he wasn’t so sure anymore. he still felt the same – angry at the world, annoyed by those lesser than him, but in a way, he was more mature. mindful of the people around him and how he affected their lives. he guessed that was what growth did to a person.

but he couldn’t let his old attitude consume him. he’d try and try and try to be better for everyone else around him.

that was until he met her.

“oi, get your fucking hands off me!” he’d heard a voice shout from just outside the bar. it sounded distressed yet confident at the same time. he wasn’t sure what was going on until he heard two other deep voices, chuckling and hurling derogatory insults in the air as if it didn’t matter.

today, it would matter to him.

Sukuna abruptly stood from his stool, causing it to fall to the ground with a loud crash as he stormed out the door of the bar. underneath the streetlights, he saw her – small and fragile, surrounded by two drunken men reaching their hands out for her. and yet, despite her predicament, Sukuna couldn’t help but smirk at her, rearing back a fist, ready to knock someone out. 

she hadn’t even heard the crash from the bar, focused solely on the annoying assholes bothering her. all she'd been doing was walking home, alone, like an idiot of course. but a little recklessness never stopped her. she doubted her punch would do much damage, but it was worth a shot anyway. 

“I said leave me the hell alone, twatbags!” she shouted, fist shaking but staying firm in a pulled-back position. if they made one more move, she'd muster up the courage and hit one of them. she hated guys like these, her office was filled with them and now she couldn’t even get a reprieve walking down the street.

suddenly, both men went wide-eyed in front of her. hah, so her scare tactics worked, she thought. she'd have to pat yourself on the back later for this achievement. “aw, little ole me got you boys scared? looks like you’re about to wet your pants.” she smirked, crossing her arms in triumph. 

until their eyes traveled from hers, to over her head. 

“these guys bothering you?” 

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ .. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ .. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ .. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ .. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ .

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . taglist: @nighttwingg @sweetsformysoul @casualpoetrytaco @lvingd3adg0rl @haikomaiko @csolya @deathlypink @sad-darksoul @elisedylandy @jinxiewritings @aldebrana @ravester @futuristiccurlyhair @san-it-is-i-guess @marie-is-in-the-dark @llovergirlll @iseeyouuu @makingtimemine @spicykimchii @shxhari @ratcoone @mollyrocks420 @willybillyletsgetsilly @distinguishedpenguinbread @ren-ni @sugar504 @runfrme @sukuna-for-life @theclassbookworm @avidreadee123 @tibibibi123 bro. just... BRO. we're at the end ｡°(°.◜ᯅ◝°)°｡ i can't believe it!!!! I really really hope I did the end of the story justice, and that everyone is happy with the ending! if not, at least I'm happy about it. THANKS TO EVERYONE WHO'S FOLLOWED, LIKED, REBLOGGED, AND COMMENTED through this whole short story!!!!! and to everyone who's requested to be tagged you have my WHOLE heart. ugh, I'm getting emotional again... but it doesn't make me too sad considering... Sukuna spin off coming soon! (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧ obviously her will turn into you in the next writing, was that obvious enough? no? damn. anyways, hope to see you all later! ദ്ദി(｡•̀ ,<)~✩‧₊ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ .

[ivesambrose]

NOVEMBER 2024 MINI MESSAGES ❤️

1. 2. 3.

And we're in November and I feel everyone's a little overwhelmed, but I intend that you receive the guidance you need.

To book a personal reading with me DM or email me at ivesambrose@gmail.com

Services offered

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Thanks for the tip!

Picture 1

You feel like you're struggling to make it up hill and maybe you're point blank exhausted, physically, mentally and emotionally. The theme of this month for you to lighten the burden you've been carrying in hopes that someone will lighten it. That someone is you. This month also calls for physical rest. I will admit there might be moments you'll feel like you have a bunch of stuff to sort out that do leave you feeling tired but trust that yourself to prioritise you. Take care of your back health some of you. You may also feel a bit emotionally distant or just plain bored or even be deep in contemplation as though you're missing something. However, I see a burst of new ideas, insights or information or clarity that lets you leave that apathetic energy you had been previously feeling, behind. It's as though out of the blue, the path clears. This month brings a positive transition which means you have to leave something behind. But what you do leave behind, won't be a loss. November ends on a more emotionally fulfulling month than it started on. Now whatever fulfills you emotionally, is innately personal to you. Trust that you'll have it and even if you can't right now, know that things will fall in place anyway.

Picture 2

Don't often say this, but it's truly your month if you're the 'I'll channel every emotion in me into getting everything done and becoming the best.' and even if you're someone who believes that slow and steady will win the race, it's still your month. You'll be working diligently into improving an aspect or multiple aspects of your life or just working hard towards your goals. By this I mean that you'll show up, you'll be consistent and you will improve. You've always been good at this now you'll be better and eventually great. Expect the rewards of your labour, especially financially. Be as ambitions as you wish to be instead of diluting yourself. If you can mentally the paint the picture then you can have it. Just make sure to not overwork and overwhelm yourself. You will be attracting influential individuals but also people who have an addictive or controlling personality, stay wary of those and keep your boundaries intact. Bit by bit, all your efforts, the dominant thoughts you have, what you say to yourself and others, what you share, what you consume etc all of it will add up. This month ends with you feeling like "A brand new person" and yes, I am referencing the Tame Impala song.

Picture 3

Oh you're fired up this month to the point even you're amused by it. Either it's a sudden burst of energy you'll feel or an opportunity that will be presented to you. You'll also be feeling excited, eager, curious and creative. Lot of planning, lot of risk taking, like you've decided to put your foot down on regards to something and you will be rather defensive of it because I'm seeing maybe some people might want to project their own ideas or limitations onto you or downplay your enthusiasm and determination. Don't let that get to you. In fact, do not overwhelm yourself this month since there is a risk of feeling burnt out. Try not to be too hot headed either and also avoid shopping as therapy (not too much, you can treat yourself though!) I do see there will be someone warm, kind and empathetic towards you. Extremely loving and understanding. Have the same energy towards yourself and those who care for you. Keep your heart a little open too. This month will end on you over coming a rather low point of your life is what I'm sensing. There's a feeling of isolation and defeat that you'll be overcoming and stepping into a version of you that's passionate and wants to experience life to their fullest.

[backus-naur]

Throw Numbers At It

You will need 4 Fate dice.

Assign skills following Fate rules.

On your turn, describe your action. Roll 4 dice. Your result is the total + your skill rank. Positive-valued results are good; negative are bad. Narrate the outcome and create an appropriate status (representing damage, advantages, information, items…) with value equal to the result, unless it's 0.

Once per round, you may repeat the above as an immediate reaction to another's roll (e.g. to defend, dodge, counterattack…).

Positive statuses for the PCs are negative for their enemies, and vice-versa.

Statuses may have Fleeting, Temporary, or Lasting duration. Fleeting is the default. If the roll's absolute value is above 4 (respectively, 8), subtract 4 (8) and upgrade the status to Temporary (Lasting).

Where narratively coherent, you may add the value of a positive status to your roll or subtract it from an enemy's roll. Each side can do this once per roll, if they ask before the dice are rolled. If the status is Fleeting, it disappears.

Temporary statuses disappear after a scene; Lasting, after a session.

If two statuses with the same duration cancel each other out narratively, combine them into one (e.g. +1 and -3 become -2).

Author notes

[I'm ok with archiving this off-site.]

Special thanks to @child-of-delirium for helping with editing!

Might not be as creative or original as other entries in this challenge, but my goal was to see if I could fit a complete generic adventure system into 200 words. Think of this as a systematized version of the playground make-believe game where kids go "I shot you with my laser!" "I blocked your laser with my shield!"

I originally wanted to add something about situational bonuses or penalties that the GM can give that affect the result of the rolls, but I didn't have enough words for it. But thinking about it afterwards, I think it works better if this is just handled purely by the narrative aspects of the statuses. For example, say that the PCs are in jail, and one of them rolls a +4 when trying to convince the guard to let them out:

If the character managed to make a good argument and appeal to the guard's personal values, they might create a +4 status called "Help From The Guard", which they can use as a bonus to their escape attempt (for example, by having him look the other way or get them a useful item).

If the character made an unconvincing argument, they still create a +4 status, but something like "The Guard's Amusement" (the argument was bad, but he thought it was funny), which can't be used directly to help the escape, but can be used as a bonus in a further attempt to convince the guard to help.

This seems cleaner and more fun to me than simply giving the player a -2 penalty or something for a bad argument. Anyway, I've probably given this way too much thought and these notes are already 150% of the size of the RPG itself.

200 Word RPGs 2024

Each November, some people try to write a novel. Others would prefer to do as little writing as possible. For those who wish to challenge their ability to not write, we offer this alternative: producing a complete, playable roleplaying game in two hundred words or fewer.

This is the submission thread for the 2024 event, running from November 1st, 2024 through November 30th, 2024. Submission guidelines can be found in this blog's pinned post, here.

[unforth]

I keep seeing posts comparing this to 2004 or other past election losses and how this feels the same or similar to those past times.

As another Old who voted in 2004 (and I missed voting in 2000 by a month and was furious about it) I really can't even put into words how vehemently I disagree.

In 2008, I remember very earnestly sitting down with some friends and saying that if somehow McCain beat Obama, I'd have to join the fucking revolution, because I couldn't believe that this country would elect a Republican AGAIN after the previous 8 years of bullshit. I look back now and think how incredibly naive I was, but I also look back now and think, damn, why aren't I 25 NOW? I can't join the revolution now, I'm 41 and I own a house and have two young children and one old parent depending on me.

Because honestly, truly, as someone who has been studying American history since I was 7, as a Civil War buff with expertise on the years before the Civil War, as someone who has at least some memories of every election since 1988... guys, this isn't the same as 2004. I was furious then. Swift Boat bullshit I swear to fucking dog. And I was and still am fairly convinced that the 2000 election was deliberately stolen. But also I still had every reason then to believe in the rule of law.

In 2004, I still believed term limits would be respected.

In 2004, I still believed a person who wasn't elected would demure gracefully to the winner.

In 2004, I still trusted the courts.

In 2004, I still believed that we'd made progress on bigotry.

I could go on, and to be clear, my point isn't "I thought these institutions were ~good~" in literally any objective sense. Y'all are cynical but my generation was raised by, surrounded by, Vietnam vets and trust me, there was no way to be a kid, seeing what the 70s did to this country, and not come out as cynical and furious as the best of um. (My grandfather was a World War 2 vet, as were his close friends. My father and both his brothers are Vietnam vets, tho my dad didn't go overseas.) But I did believe that even corrupt institutions, even broken racist systems, even fucking Republicans, would follow basic norms of democracy. They said they believed in the constitution and I believed them. I believed that, like Nixon, truly getting caught doing something insane would at least force a mea culpa and turn public opinion. I believed...

Well, I guess it doesn't matter.

Because I no longer believe any of that.

I have watched the guard rails disappear over my lifetime. I have watched the party who once spent 2 years pursuing a guy over a BJ in the oval office elect a convicted rapist. I have watched and at times I've participated and I've voted and I've organized and I've protested and I've read the news more days than not and I've lived and I've grown and I've learned.

I have been an adult, legally, for almost 24 years now.

Guys... there are no norms remaining on the far right. The guard rails are gone. The Fascists control the White House, the senate, the Supreme Court, and things aren't looking promising for the House.

The bus has no brakes anymore. They think they have a mandate - and I can't blame them, as horrifying as this mandate is, because if things had gone the other way and Harris had gotten these results I'd also think it was a mandate.

Please sit with what this means: Trump and the Republican party said, "hand us the reins and we'll make everyone you hate hurt," and more than half the people who bothered to vote said "sure buddy, here goes." We don't have a usurper this time. This is the country that the majority of Americans said they wanted. Whether they come to regret that or not, they saw open Fascism and went "oh yes, count me in." And it wasn't because of the electoral college this time. It was because this country is so bigoted and misogynistic that they'd rather have this than a woman of color in the office.

I'm sick of "well she didn't run a good campaign." (Lie.) I'm sick of, "well we didn't get a primary." (Who cares?) I'm *extremely* sick of "well, Palestine." (Yes! Democrats actions have made the suffering there so much worse! It fucking sucks! You know what's about to suck so much worse?)

15 million people who showed up for Joe Biden couldn't be fussed to place a vote for Kamala Harris. Whatever their reason for not voting, we all knew the outcome if she lost. And seeing open fascism didn't fire them up enough to make the effort, and that's fucking pathetic. The consequences of the worst happening mattered so little to them that they couldn't be fucking bothered to make the minimum effort to stop it, and now millions of people will suffer as a result.

Because here we are: the huge swathe of the country who wanted a strongman now have one.

Look, I don't know what happens next. But I do know, and remember keenly: after 2016, Trump did, or at least tried to do, most of the things he said he'd do. When he was stopped, it was often because of career government employees: judges, bureaucrats, etc. And this time, he's said he's going to purge those people. I don't know if he'll succeed, but I certainly believe he'll try.

This is not 2004 again.

This is 2024. The Republicans have ripped the mask to shreds, shredded apart the book of political norms, and empowered hate, and they've been handed a governmental mandate for stamped "have at with our blessing!" in exchange.

And now they'll use that mandate to make everyone they hate suffer: people of color, queer people, trans people, immigrants, non-Christians.

Don't assume the worst can't happen. I am a Jew, and I have a photo album full of black and white photos of dead people that constantly reminds me: the worst has happened and it can happen again.

Do not despair. Despair is enervating. Be furious. As we should be. These douche bags are repulsive. Be prepared to fight. Be prepared to flee. Be prepared to defend. Don't assume you simply can't do something. There's always something to do, and even the smallest act of defiance can help. There's never any knowing until after which acts of resistance will end up galvanizing the good and just out of their apathy. But that apathy is the enemy.

Because none of this is normal. None of this is "just like when..." Please stop saying it is.

And before anyone screams "privilege" at me, yes, I am in many ways. I'm white. I have access to some generational money even tho my own family lives paycheck to paycheck - we won't be rich but have enough of a support network to be comfortable. I live in a blue area of a blue state. But I'm also a woman (legally speaking, at least) married to another woman - since before Oberkfell, and yes I remember exactly what steps we had planned any time we wanted to leave our state. My wife has physical disabilities. We have two children. Both are biracial (half black). One is trans. We are caring for an elderly parent. I am Jewish and as my kids' birth parent, so are they. I own a publishing company that publishes the exact kinds of queer and kinky lit these people intend to ban. We tick so many boxes of what these people hate.

I know ya'll are scared. Trust me, I'm terrified. But fear is paralyzing. And that won't help. Whatever happens, don't lie down and take this shit.

When Gore lost I was one month shy of my 18th birthday and already in college. I have been fighting my entire adult life, and I'm exhausted. I'm much less able to fight now, much more tied down with responsibilities. But the fight isn't over. I'm checking our passports. I'm packing a go bag. I've convinced one vulnerable friend to move here and I have another who wants to and we're figuring out how to make that happen. I'm protecting who I can, starting with putting on my mask first. I don't know what will happen but if in the end all I can do is uproot my entire life to protect my children then I am preparing to do so. I can at least save them if no one else.

None of this is normal.

And I'm not sure, after Trump's in office, that anything will ever be normal again in the US. At least not the old normal. And there are ways that's a good thing, so many ways that the old normal sucked for so many people, and I'm optimistic that there's a bright future ahead, but man it looks far away right now. I don't want to go back to the old normal, and I want to be part of establishing a kinder, more just, more equal new normal, but we're a long way from there.

Whatever happens, we must endure. We must survive. We must support each other. We must find our allies and be prepared to compromise with them. Don't try to save everyone. You'll fail. Help even one person and you can change the world. Everyone things they can't do everything and so do nothing. That's insane. Do a single thing and it will be better than nothing. One phone call. One letter. One act of defiance. Very few people get the opportunity to grand gestures that matter, and the rest of us will die waiting for that moment. But the secret is that what makes those moments - the time when one person is in the right place at the right time for their action to matter - is built on millions of small moments by millions of people doing what little they can to make things slightly better. Think of every iconic photograph of a Sole Resistor you know of and think about every single tiny thing that had to happen for that moment to occur. Most of us will never me that one person, but that one person is a myth anyway. Countless tiny unseen moments create those myths. Doing literally anything is better than doing nothing.

And tooth and nail, quietly and loudly, in our homes and our towns and cities, during protests or when they come for our neighbors, we must fight.

[sazzynatural]

Pairing: BuckTommy Prompt: Tommy asks Buck to move in. <3 <3 <3 <3

OH THIS WILL BE FUN. I have so many scenarios inside my head regarding that, so here goes one of them!

Warning for terrible dialogue. I just don't know how to make it sound flowy and natural 🥲

-------

It comes up unexpected and unprompted on a regular Tuesday morning when Buck is spitting out the toothpaste out of his mouth into Tommy's bathroom sink with Tommy mimicking him right after.

He hands Tommy his pack of floss threader next and he doesn't catch Tommy's smile of amusement until he's wiped his mouth clean from any toothpaste remains.

"What's so funny?" He sees Tommy's eyes glinting playfully with a hint of adoration in the reflection of the bathroom mirror and turns to face his boyfriend properly.

"You do realize what is happening here, right?"

Buck blinks. Confused, and Tommy ducks his head and chuckles. "Evan. You handing me the flosser without me asking. You did the exact same thing with the toothpaste. And my comb. You've been doing it the past few times you've stayed over."

And Buck smiles at that. "I suppose I have. I guess I didn't think about it."

"Exactly. You're getting comfortable."

And that's when Buck's smile fades. He's been through this before and knows what comes next. You're getting comfortable. He is getting ahead of things again, going too hard too fast for his partner's liking. You're getting comfortable. You're getting comfortable.

"Whoa! Evan! Hey. You still with me?"

"I'm sorry!"

Tommy stares at Buck for a moment with eyebrows furrowed in mixture of concern and confusion.

"What are you sorry about? I think it's great."

"You know I can take it if–"

"Okay, I think I know what is going on here. C'mere." Tommy's words are soft and encouraging when he tilts Buck's chin up with his fingers, and despite the uncertainty going on inside Buck's head at the moment, he can't help but to follow his instinct and fall right into Tommy's personal space.

"Whatever is happening inside your head right now? It's not real. I am right here, Evan. I am not your exes. I am not put off by your presence. It's the complete opposite of that."

And Buck believes him. Of course he does. Tommy has the power to read him and wash away any doubt with so much sincerity and care that it feels impossible not to trust him.

It doesn't make Buck feel any less stupid for even having that doubt in the first place.

"Of course I know that, Tommy. Deep down I– I do know that."

"Well, that's a relief. But in case there is any doubt left lingering..." Tommy is looking nervous all of a sudden, causing Buck to look right back at Tommy with the same confusion as before.

"When I said you're getting comfortable I meant it as a good thing, because... you seem right at home. I mean in my mind you've already moved in so I guess what I am trying to say is–"

"Yes!"

"Wha– Evan! I haven't asked the question yet."

"You said moving in! I think I can make the connection."

Tommy laughs and Buck smiles back widely.

"So it's a yes? Are you sure?"

"Yes. Yes, Tommy, I am sure."

Tommy sighs with relief. "Okay."

"Okay."

[ikamigami]

Nxbxbbcbcbcbnxbxbxn

Today's episode heavy breathing was just everything

Moon shouldn't wait till Sun run away to go to him..

But I think that he just needed some time to think what to say..

Cause I knew it! He said to Solar that he said what was needed to be said.. which definitely implies that Moon was afraid that he'll say something insensitive or start yelling at Sun bxbxbxbbxbx

He didn't want that..

And yeeeessss Moon finally realized that no one expects him to fix everything QwQ

And that Sun doesn't need him.. and even if Moon might have said that because he hates himself..

I think that in this situation he meant that Sun isn't going to die without Moon because he's so dumb etc..

I think that Moon finally distanced himself from.. himself.. (edit: cause actually yeah after thinking about it more it really was more about how Moon hates himself and that Nexus was better and that Sun shouldn't choose him but Nexus that's why he said that Sun doesn't need him nxnxnnxnxnxn I was happy too quickly QwQ)

Hdndnndndnndndndn

Which allowed him to see Sun for who he is.. for how awesome brother Sun is.. and to why Sun loves Nexus and that's why he said that he would still be Sun's brother even if Sun loved Nexus more than him and even if Sun chose Nexus to live because he regretted killing Nexus bxbxbxbbxbxb QwQ

I'm so happy that despite Moon being afraid to be left by Sun he put Sun's feelings first.. he was considerate about Sun's feelings QwQ bxbxnxnnxnxnxn

Moon really is trying his best.. it makes me so emotional QwQ 💞

Also Lunar whyyyyy jxnxnxnxnnx

Yes Sun shouldn't be held captive but Lunar should still know where Sun is or if he's away for a long time he should call him or something..

Like Sun shouldn't go out or be left alone for too long.. not in this state..

I hope that Solar and Moon will have a talk and Moon will apologize for getting to upset at Solar especially cause Solar told him such a nice thing and he was right that Sun needed to talk to Moon QwQ

And now onto Sun..

Hooo boi..

Sun can't hate Nexus which is not surprising to me at all..

And ofc Sun said that maybe he doesn't need Moon but he wants him in his life.. which I always knew..

And I think that this is exactly what Dark Sun was unable to understand.. or maybe he understood this while talking with Moon?

But at the same time I'm still angry that he traumatised Sun so much with forcing him to choose to kill his brother and that I think that he knew that Ruin put that bomb in Nexus' chest which is why Sun's magic killed Nexus bxbxbbxbddn

But the most important part I wanted to point out from today's episode is that Sun didn't agreed nor accept Moon's words of support nxnxnnxnxnxnxnxn

Which means that Sun doesn't agree with Moon that he's a good brother QwQ

He also still doesn't want to shout out what weigh on him..

And he didn't thank Moon bxbxbbx

Cause I think that Nexus' words truly felt like proof to Sun.. proof that he's a terrible person actually..

This is so awfully relatable..

Cause at first I thought that maybe it'll be the time for Sun to open up but noooo

And it's so relatable QwQ

Sun wanted to have Moon as a brother.. he wanted to have Nexus as a brother.. he wanted to have a family..

Damn it QwQ

And I only say that Nexus is damn liar xnnxnxnnxnxn (cause I watched the podcast)

I think that he blames everything on Sun cause it's easier to hate a person he loved the most..

Like no one knows that Nexus had that vivid dream - except Monty bxbxbxbbxbx

No one knows that Nexus was afraid of Sun dying..

Nexus was so worried but his worries were constantly ignored..

This is what is the most sad thing to me.. that Nexus never talked to Sun about anything..

They both loved each other so much and yet..

And also ha ha I don't believe that Nexus wanted to kill Sun the most..

Such bs when he never even hurt Sun at all - physically I mean..

I'll die on the hill that Nexus actually cared deeply about Sun but he was just confused..

It's not Sun's fault.. again..

And also people completely forgot that Moon's computer constantly was comparing Nexus to Moon - saying that Nexus is dumb compared to Moon and it tried to and downloaded all the knowledge into Nexus' head..

But no "it was all Sun bla bla bla"

Nexus never wanted to talk to Sun about anything.. he only yelled so Sun stopped mentioning Moon..

Maybe if Nexus talked with Sun like a normal person.. then maybe he'd learn that Sun still loved Moon despite all the abuse.. and then if he allowed Sun to talk about the past and grieve and move on and also talk about his own insecurities etc then Sun would definitely apologized and he'd give Nexus space to be his own person..

But also he actually gave him that space.. he saw how much Solar was making Nexus happy so he didn't bother them.. but also Nexus is such a liar cause he obviously enjoyed playing games with Sun.. they had so much fun.. he wasn't threatening Sun like Moon used to do.. and also Sun never wanted Nexus to fix everything.. and definitely not on his own..

And I think that Nexus knows that..

But I think that the fear of Sun dying was too much so it broke Nexus..

And it was easier for him to hate Sun then even admit that..

Nexus knows that he wasn't the best to Sun like he claims himself to be.. but he can't admit his wrongs..

Just like Moon used to do..

Solar was right that Nexus isn't that much different from Moon but he doesn't want to admit it..

And yet Nexus claimed to be the Moon cause he called Moon a knockoff..

I think that Nexus loved Sun deeply but he also couldn't admit to being wrong..

His ego is what destroyed him actually..

That's why he acted like Creator.. cause I was thinking for quite some time that the more egotistic Nexus was the more he acted like Creator.. cause Creator made them.. so he became like Creator who is a pure ego..

And also Nexus saying that Sun would probably purposely hurt him.. yeah sure Jan keep lying to yourself..

Like they say whatever makes you sleep better, right Nexie ^^

Poor Sun loves Nexus so much yet he has to suffer now because Nexus pretended till the end that he never cared and hates Sun 🥺😭💔

[1percychase]

Unpopular opinion: Nico's trauma is over rated

Okay so I'm not saying that it's not validated or anything, there's a reason it's over rated, but so many fans act like he's the only one and that no one else's trauma matters because Nico has it the worst. When did we start comparing literal trauma?? I think somebody we should look into more is honestly.. Percy. He's the main character and all, but it's almost like all the fans forgot how much he's gone through, which is CRAZY to me. Anyways I have a list cause I love making list and yeah.

1. Getting abused by his step dad, which made him feel worthless and like he didn't matter.

2. Everyone bullying him.

3. The only person who ever seemed to care about him, his mom, disappeared.

4. Getting punished bc of his father.

5. Getting accused of stealing something and getting sent on a quest at TWELVE.

6. His first friend at camp betrayed him, which gave him trust issues.

7. His best friend getting kidnapped.

8. Getting turned into a guinea pig, which actually gave him a phobia over.

9. Having suicidal thoughts while only being THIRTEEN.

10. Never thinking he is enough.

11. His other best friend being kidnapped.

12. Watching Bianica sacrifice herself after he tried to stop her.

13. Holding up the literal sky while also being injured.

14. Being blamed for Bianica's death (and believing it.)

15. Finding out Nico is a child of Hades and deciding to protect him against the Prophecy even if he hated him.

16. Annabeth mad at him bc Rachel likes him, even though he can't control that.

17. Getting lost and separated in the Labyrinth.

18. Watching Pan fade out of existence.

19. Watching Bekendorf explode on a boat.

20. Being the Demigod of the Prophecy.

21. Fighting a war on his birthday, the battle of Manhattan.

22. Watching so many people die in front of his eyes, knowing he couldn't save them.

23. Silena betraying him and the camp (I don't think she was a bad guy at the end but yea.)

24. Feeling guilty that Luke committed suicide and blaming himself when it isn't his fault (idk how true this one is but I've seen it so..)

25. Being kidnapped and all his memory taken away.

26. (This one is kinda a joke) Watching Octavian kill his pillow pet.. rip perry the panda pillow pet.

27. Being in another Prophecy of the seven.

28. Being afraid of drowning, while also being a child of Poseidian.

29. Falling into Tarturus with Annabeth.

30. Going completely psycho and mad.

31. Leaving Bob it Tarturus and feeling super guilty about it.

32. Making Gaia rise with a nosebleed.

33. Fighting in the battle of camp half blood.

34. Thinking Leo died.

35. Finally thinking he has a break and getting asked to help Apollo.

36. Becoming an older brother. (it's not like physical trauma but I'll explain it later)*

37. Jason's death.

38. Going on more quest to get college recommendation letters.

*okay so becoming an older brother was on this list because even if he was so happy to get a half sibling, he's been an only child for a long time and it's hard to accept new people in your life. Also older brother duties. Even if he was just leaving the house when she was a couple months old, I still put it on there bc many people can count it as one. Also I'm the oldest out of 6 kids growing up so I would count it lol*

And people still have the audacity to say percy was too much of a jerk in heroes of olympus, please. I would act the same way.

Anyways I actually have a list of a lot of different characters traumas cause I got bored one night so if you want to see the other list, tell me!!

[mariacallous]

I just can't believe he won again. After four goddamn years of his shit and people still want him over a qualified black woman?!

I blame so many people for this. Men, the press, everyone who said Biden needed to drop out and let someone else run, etc.

I hope this fucking haunts every person who said both sides are the same. And I hope it haunts Pelosi and everyone who thought Niden dropping out would make this election a landslide.

It shouldn't have been this way

Completely agree.

[felikatze]

I think Happily Ever After and The Cage both explore some similar topics in inverse ways and once again the Prisoner and the Damsel are twisted mirrors of one another

Pristine Cut spoilers and discussion of abusive relationships below. One suicide mention but it's STP what do you expect tbh

Compilation of rant I went on on discord 👍

prisoner and damsel are very much always parallels since u take the same path to get to them so they're both versions of the princess that you the player Trust, right. and the Greys are a betrayal of that trust if you kill them, and all that. obvs w the prisoner being reluctant trust and the damsel being unconditional because Knife.

but HEA and Cage are both about being Trapped. In Cage, the Princess has seen the same thing happen twice now, she's disillusioned, she's never going to escape. It will be The Same Thing, Forever.

WHICH IS. THE EXACT SAME AS HEA. The Princess believes she is never going to escape. That it will be Just This, Forever. And both of them believe that it *has* to be Just This Forever even if they don't *want* it to be.

Both of this is shown through an Externalized Force. in Cage, that is the Princess' body, which she has conceived as separate from herself. The body simply acts as it must, which she has no input over. Ignoring, of course, that she can *make it stop.*

And that's the same way HEA can't imagine she'll ever escape the Smitten! She's afraid and scared of change, of the torches going out!! But she wants it more than anything!!

Yet these two routes are foils for each other, too. Bcuz in Cage, it's the Princess who enforces the pattern, and in HEA it's the Hero. (part of him, anyways.) What's interesting here too that both of the routes result from a breakdown of communications.

I said in my big long rambly Cage post, but Cage route doesn't happen bcuz Fate, it's bcuz the Princess wants the Hero to carry her head out and he just *doesn't get it.* He just didn't understand what she wanted.

And the leadup to HEA, everyone in Hero's head is upset because they can't communicate to the Princess what is freaking him out, and Smitten tries to... well... show her, I guess.

(Post-rant addition: Hey, both the Prisoned and the Smitten kill themselves to get their points across. Add that to the parallels tally!)

also like abusive relationship metaphors on both ends tbh. Smitten doesn't respect Princess' autonomy at all. I think part of that is the end of Damsel means he doesn't think she *has* any interiority when it's Hero + Paranoid/Opportunist who want the Princess to be a person instead of a doll, which causes her to be a Person Again in HEA. But Smitten is, again, just so stuck on the vision of Damsel who no longer exists.

+ you could also read Damsel chapter in the context of HEA as just seeing that this is the first person who could conceivably save her so she is leaning in HARD to the romance angle because she sees it as the best way to finally get out. Got herself into the romance out of desparation and now she's stuck and regretting it.

So TLDR Smitten doesn't actually respect Princess as a person and just wants her to be this perfect image he has of her, and we see also in HEA how he literally restrains Princess + Hero and deliberately scares Princess when she even dares voice her own opinion. Smitten sucks so bad in this one and it's shit of him but also thematically interesting and again a good escalation of his character.

Cage on the flipside is the typical "I can't help myself" excuse. See, *she's* not at fault here. It's her *body* doing this! Really, nothing could change this. And u see the rebuttal of that angle from the Hero's dialogue options ("You're making a choice. You're choosing violence *right now.*)

No matter how often she says she's just a head, she's still the one who physically restrained the Hero (wow, just like the Smitten!), it's her who refuses to listen to anything the Hero has to say (wonder who that reminds me of), and it's her who is hurting him, on purpose, to feel better about herself.

the "good" endings to these chapters (as much as there are no wrong endings) meaning leaving with the cage's head / dancing with hea under the stars, both of these only occur once Hero/HEA are finally heard and acknowledged. Cage is so rattled that the Hero didn't bring the knife that she finally actually listens to a single word he's got to say and the two can break out, and the final torch in HEA only goes out once Princess says "I'm so tired of this." and has the courage to say what *she* wants and is *listened to.*

in conclusion (x2): STP good 👍 i love you missus the cage

[the-silver-peahen-residence]

"Hey, that was a bit uncalled for wasn't it?" Yuji looks to Kazuma but it seems he didn't stop looking upset after all this happening tonight.

"Kaz.." Mothra said. Kazuma growls, "Don't call me that! You may be you, but you're still a robot! Stop trying to act like you care! That's part of your programming, okay! Stop going go and beyond like you're human."

"Dude, that's not fair to say that! Haven't you seen what's happened so far!" Yuji said at him but he glares back.

"I have seen what's happened and it's getting worse. All because of those robots!" he shouted back at Yuji glaring at him then at Mothra.

"All because they think they can become human-"

He stops hearing Taz's shout but Yuji knew she was right. Right now isn't the time to argue. They had to find their friends and insure everyone is alright. See and catch this bad guy. And save this place.

"Save?! What else is there to save!? Whoever is messing with this place is some psychopath! Like what the fuck?!" Kazuma cursed. "What the hell do they want with this place?!"

"We don't know but their has to be a reason." Yuji said but heard Kazuma's bitter laughter.

"Oh I think I know! She and her so called friends wants to kill everyone in this damn place! Their after our blood and wants to kill us just like those kids at the basement right!? All because of the accidents right!" he said.

"......It's not that." Mothra said.

"Yes it is! You robots think your all alive and have a heart for humans but you DON'T! Your cold blooded killers that only cares about spilling the blood of the innocent! How can we even trust you guys after what happened!" he said pointing at Mothra who was silent.

"Believe me Kaz, me and my friends don't want to hurt anyone. We love all the people and children that come here to have fun. What happened that day and to the other children..it wasn't us. It was a fail malfunction.." she said.

"So your 'malfunction' of the kids being killed was false? Was kidnapping part of it? Was the glitch something use to hide behind what you guys did!?" he said mad.

"Kazuma STOP!" Yuji said glaring at him. "You need to calm down! It's her nor the others fault. It's the one that's causing all this to happen. Can't you see she's been trying to help us! If you didn't forget, Meko was taken because this crazy mysterious person forced one of them to take him. Right now, we are trying to save him before he ends up being the next victim. And that might be the same for our friend Miko or others!"

"......" However, Kazuma glares at Yuji but looks away. "Fine. I don't trust none of them after what happened and I still won't even to this night. She's lucky is all I'm saying. She nor the others deserve mercy anyway for what they caused. Honestly, they deserve to be destroyed for it." he hissed. "As I stated, their is nothing else left to save. Everything has gone down to shit by now."

"And you know? Maybe we should give them what they want! Maybe they will let us go if we do what they say!" he said.

"Are you insane!?" Yuji said.

"I'm not! We could have been killed by these things!" he argues back.

"I think that works for us, Mothra. Besides, just in case something happens we have a safe place to go to." Yuji can agree with that. Even with things happening right now, that was still risky.

However, he sighed remaining silent about it. However, he did wonder about the others.

"Right now, Rodan is upset, and Zilla. I'm not sur.! But I do know he's somewhere around." Mothra stated. "Rodan has been ignoring my calls. Zilla as well. It's best believed that they might be affected by the glitch."

"I will try to call them..." She said, trying to get someone on the line. Maybe Daichi and Megumi, "I know Yuria, Nobara, and Hana are getting help from someone."

"Huh? Someone?" Yuji asked.

"Yes. Another woman is on the other line.." She said. "It's someone they met before."

"It's Akane." Kazuma added making Mothra's eyes lit up, "Akane! She's from the prize counter." Mothra stated.

"So Akane was able to help them out so that's good too! We know they are safe but I wonder if they are still moving." He asked but Mothra sighed.

"I'm sure they are after everything else. But we can try to contact whoever we can. You all can come with me to my safe green room. I have a computer monitor that should let us get a better view and hopefully contact your friends." she said.

"Really? That would be-"

"Ohhh no! How come we can't do it here!?" Kazuma said.

"Because the signal is being jammed out here. In my area we should be able to have a better chance of reaching someone." Mothra said trying to not scare Kazuma. After everything he's seen tonight can you blame him? Yuji would due to his behavior but he was also scared so that was another reason.

"Listen, we can try contacting the other two to hope they will answer me. They have to if I can try to just get through to them." she said. "Besides, we are wasting time talking when we could be trying to help them.." Mothra explains to Kazuma.

[harleenfleck]

But please, can we talk about the lowkey perspective of Gary Puddles in "Joker" and "Joker: Folie a Deux"?:

-You were born with the condition of dwarfism

-It's okay, it's fine, you can live with it

-Teasing because of your height is part of your life, you think it will change when you become an adult but it doesn't

-Your economy is not the best and even worse, you live in Gotham City

-You work as a party clown and absolutely EVERYONE makes fun of your height

-All except one person

-His name is Arthur, Arthur Fleck. And believe it or not, his life is harder than yours

-His pathological laughing condition and his mental problems make his life really fucked up

-But he's still trying to get by, you know something about him being alone in the world and helping his ailing mother

-And despite not hurting anyone, he is even more rejected at work than you

-And he says nothing, does nothing, just puts up with everything, and tries to go on and do his job well

-He seems to consider you his friend and that's okay, he's the only one who doesn't make fun of you in the place

-One day, you discover that, because of the accusation of another of your co-workers (one of the closest to you), Arthur is fired

-You don't hear from him for days, you're hoping he's really okay

-The police arrive at work looking for the suspect in the murder of three wealthy men and that co-worker who got Arthur fired insists on going to visit him so they can be “on the same page” when the police question them.

-You learn that Arthur's mother passed away. “Oh, poor boy,” you think, ”He's all alone in the world now"

-You and that co-worker are going to give condolences to Arthur's department

-Finds him and you see he's in clown makeup “Well, he got a new job”

-He tells you he's off his meds, something's not right.

-You see that your coworker tries to talk to him about what the police are questioning and Arthur seems to agree

-You are about to witness the worst moment of your life

-Arthur kills Randall right in front of your eyes

-Everything is so surreal and horrible. What has Arthur become?

-You want to run away, but the door is blocked. Arthur helps you unlock it

-"You were the only one who was ever nice to me" He said to you and let you go

-Despite the fear is attacking your body and with your limitations, you go to the police to report the incident

-You find out what Arthur confesses and does on the Murray Franklin Show

-Time passes and you can't go back to being you. You have nightmares all the time, you just want to be locked up in your home, you feel like you are in danger, of how really helpless you are

-And you keep wondering why Arthur Fleck became what he is now

-Two years pass and you are called to testify at Arthur's trial.

-You're nervous and scared, but you still show up.

-When you are in court, all Arthur does is start making fun of you, mocking your height, your last name, your fear, your feelings, and assuring you that you were no different than the rest who treated him badly, and talked about a strange sense of “freedom”

-You can't believe what Arthur has become.

-You can't take it anymore and you explode, you say what you really think of him now, how afraid you are of him

-You can see the remorse in Arthur's eyes, but he insists on being in his role as “Joker.”

-“You were the only one who was ever nice to me” you say the same words he once said to you.

-You know that Arthur feels a huge remorse, but he doesn't want to get out of his role

-When the Judge tells you that you can leave, you do, and as you walk out of there, you keep asking yourself “Why did Arthur have to become like this?” with tears in your eyes

-And probably to find out later that this old friend left that world in the most painful way possible

Poor Gary, hardly anyone talks about his point of view in this story, and it is by far, one of the saddest, to be honest.

[str4wberrysw4n]

𝓡𝐄𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑: 𝐮 𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐚 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐥 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐥𝐨𝐥˙✧˖°🎀⋆｡˚꩜

if u've been in the manifestation/loa community for like less than a week, u probably already know abt the statement: "ur the creator of ur reality." the meaning of the phrase is exactly how it sounds: u control every single thing abt u and around u. all of ur manifestations/"desires" are possible bcuz u, the creator, have decided that they are possible. stuff like that. however, I feel like some people don't understand what that really means and how much power u actually hold.

when u are the creator, u don't have limitations. everything that happens is ur doing. ur relationships, ur appearance, ur lifestyle -- everything is being controlled by ur subconscious, whether u know it or not.

if u decide "oh, that boy rejected me, so that means he and i aren't meant to be", that thought manifests into the 3d and that boy and u aren't meant to be. that's because u as the creator have decided that this person will feel that way about u.

"if im the creator of my reality, then why can't I manifest my desires?" first of all, I've already said this before: u are constantly manifesting ur desires. in fact, u saying that u can't manifest is not only u putting limiting beliefs on urself, but ur also calling them desires, meaning that ur still trapped in the illusion of the physical world.

second, i think I've also mentioned this before-- we are limitless beings experiencing human life in the physical world. if u want to be wealthy, a bunch of money isn't gonna just drop from the sky. while the 4d is the true reality, ur subconscious will still manifest in a way that doesn't seem weird or straight up bizarre to the average human. that’s why we don't notice/recognize when we've manifested something; because it happens in such a natural way that u can't tell if it was a coincidence or ur actual manifestation (spoiler alert: it's the second option)

knowing this, think abt what it means to truly be a creator. u basically control everyone and everything around u. the creator doesn't fear abt their "desires" never coming to pass bcuz they know that if its not happening, it is not meant for their life in the physical realm. they will see something happen in the 3d that conflicts with what they imagine in the 4d. but instead of wavering, they let themselves process their emotions and then remind themselves that the 3d is an illusion, the old story, and that the 4d is the new one.

this is where anti-loa come in and say "oh so if someone's homeless, then they chose that for themselves?" "if someone's dying of cancer, then they chose that for themselves?" and this has actually been a point that I've agreed with for some time. what abt ppl who go through genuine pain and suffering in the world? are they at fault?? this bugged me for some time and i only just found an answer now. so do i agree?

"yes" and no.

(i have not experienced either of these things. I've seen people manifest illnesses away and money when they needed it, but i have not personally experienced it. so pls take my following words with a grain of salt ^_^)

let's start with the homeless thing as an example: if ur homeless, it is incredibly difficult to remind urself that in the 4d, ur incredibly rich and wealthy. such awful conditions and circumstances make it hard for someone to persist. this ends up in them unfortunately conforming to the 3d and leaving things up to chance instead of taking control.

same thing with illnesses; how can u tell urself that in the 4d, that ur cancer free, when ur possibly confined to a hospital bed? they can still control their realities, but not only is it incredibly difficult to do so, but some people either don't know or don't believe in manifestation, indirectly abdicating their title as creator. so it is "their fault"... but at the same time it isn't. (ppl r obviously entitled to their own beliefs as well)

to sum it up, u are the creator of ur reality and u control everything that happens to u or around u. we r all human beings experiencing life in the physical realm so ur subconscious manifests ur 4d in a way that makes logical sense to u. however, when ur experiencing smth bad, it's not ur fault if u waver or find it hard to persist!! (the 3d can pack a punch sometimes) as long as ur able to remind urself of the power that u hold, u'll be able to get through it!!

happy manifesting!!!! (≧▽≦)ིྀ

[bradshawshawaiianshirt]

Stuck on the Past | Part 8

Bradley 'Rooster' Bradshaw x Ex-girlfriend!Reader

Summary: You never thought you'd see Bradley Bradshaw again, especially the way things ended between the two of you. So what happens when he's suddenly back for a special mission and is determined to win you back too?

Warnings: Angst (ish), adult language, drinking

Length: 1.8k

Stuck on the Past masterlist

"We need to talk."

Bradley stood in front of you, his heart pounding and slightly breathless from jogging up the stairs to your door. As soon as he'd docked, he'd sped towards your apartment, probably running a few red lights along the way. He knew he probably looked tired and he was still in his flight suit, but you were the only thing on his mind. He didn't have time to waste. He didn't know what he was going to say or do, he just knew he had to see you and the right words would find him. Hopefully.

When he pulled up outside your building, his first thought was that you wouldn't buzz him in, so he couldn't believe his luck when April opened the the main entrance at the same time he'd been walking towards it.

She saw him immediately and had held the door open tentatively, almost guarding the building, looking him up and down, before sighing, "Great timing, she's upstairs." He nodded quickly and moved to walk in, but she stopped him, her voice stern, "Don't fuck it up this time, Bradshaw."

"I wont." he said quickly, as he held her stare. Eventually, April nodded, and stood aside to let him in. "Thank you." he said, before jogging in the direction of your door.

Once he was stood outside, he wasted no time in knocking. But when you answered almost instantly, he realised he still hadn't thought of what he was going to say, so he settled on, "We need to talk."

Your breath caught in your throat as you saw him, "Bradley?"

"I'm here." he huffed, "Can I come in? Please?"

You bit your lip nervously and nodded, cautiously letting him inside. He walked into your living room and frowned as he saw the boxes scattered across the floor. His eyes flicked from box to box as you said, "Ignore all the boxes, I'm-"

"Are you moving?" he quickly turned to face you.

You nodded, unable to meet his eyes, "It's a long story-"

"But you didn't write the article?" Bradley took a few steps towards you, his head spinning as he hoped you were just moving to a new place somewhere close by.

You shook your head, "No. I didn't write it." You watched as Bradley glanced at all the boxes again, "I got another job... In Washington. My flight leaves tomorrow."

His eyes met yours once again. He paused, before shaking his head, "No. You're not leaving."

You frowned, "Bradley, I'm sorry about what happened but-"

"No." he said, taking another step towards you, "You're not leaving. You can't." he paused, "I almost died out there. I almost died so I can't... I won't waste anymore time on- on running, running from us, from... being happy." he ran a hand through his hair, "You make me happy. That's the bottom line. I want that for the rest of my life and I know you do too."

"Bradley..." you sighed.

"I've been in love with you since the minute I saw you," he continued, "and you know what? Through all the deployments and moving, that's the only constant thing in my life. Whether we're together or we're not, it doesn't matter because I love you." he rambled, "When I first saw you, at the Hard Deck, I couldn't believe my luck. It's like I was being given another chance to do things right. I thought... it was like, fate or something."

You felt a lump in your throat as he continued, "And when- when I found out about the article, I was upset, you know, I was pissed." he huffed, "But I was more angry with myself. I was angry because I screwed us up, you were right, okay? I ran." he stepped forward and gently placed his hand on your cheek, "But I'm not that person anymore, I'm not scared anymore, I want you. All of you. I want cheesy movies and late night talking, I want you to beat me at pool every single time we play." he chuckled, tucking a stray hair behind your ear, "I love you. I always have and sweetheart, that's just the way it's always going to be. So you're not leaving. You can't."

Bradley let out a tense breath and watched you closely as he waited for you to say something. He didn't think he'd been that honest with anyone in years, but there was no way in hell he could lose you a second time.

Your eyes drifted from his and towards the floor, "Bradley.." you sighed and finally met his eyes, "You were the love of my life and I... I think about you all the time, but-"

"No," he muttered, "No buts, please-"

You shook your head and took a step back from him, "You and I... We don't work. We might have worked for a little while back then, but that was years ago. Things are different now, I'm different and I can't-" you took a breath, holding back the tears that were threatening to spill, "I can't put myself through loving you again. Not when it's bound to end the same way."

"Sweetheart-"

"I think you should leave." you crossed your arms, wanting to look strong, clam and collected, when really all you wanted was to run to him and tell him everything was fine. You knew, however, that you couldn't, that you needed a fresh start, that it was the rational thing to do.

Bradley said nothing. The most he could do was give you a small and curt nod, before quietly leaving your apartment.

That was when you let the tears come.

It was the next morning, while waiting to board your flight, that he called you. You'd spent all night second guessing your decision, going to call him and then switching your phone off, you'd practically forced yourself through the airport. It was times like these when you wished you had some sort of angel or something to tell you what to do, whether you should make the smart decision or the reckless one. You watched as he called, deciding ultimately not to pick up, since it was almost boarding time anyways, but you couldn't resist listening to the voicemail he'd left you.

You found a quiet corner of the airport and pressed play.

Hey, uh, I was just going to call to say that I hope you have a safe flight.

There was a pause.

Okay, no, I know that's what I should be saying but-

You heard him groan.

If by some miracle you listen to this before you get on the plane, could you just do one thing for me? Switch off your brain for a second. You've always been smart, way smarter than me, but I need you to just.. not be, just for a minute.

You closed your eyes, taking a deep breath as you carried on listening.

I want you to listen to your heart for a sec. I know it sounds cheesy sweetheart, but I need you to think about how you feel. If you don't love me, go ahead and get on that plane, and I promise you, I will never bother you again. But if you do...

You heard him sigh.

I'm gonna be waiting for you tonight at the Hard Deck. If you don't come by 11... then I'll know, and I'll try to move on, even though my heart is and will always be yours. Goodbye sweetheart.

The line cut off and you stared at your phone screen for what felt like forever, until a voice echoed through the airport.

"Flight 731 to Washington is now boarding. All passengers on flight 731 to Washington, your flight is now boarding."

-

Bradley sat at the bar of the Hard Deck and checked his watch for the eighth time, 10.46. He sighed and glanced around the bar again, feeling stupid, because for all he knew, you hadn't even got the voicemail and had maybe even already landed in Washington.

He tapped his fingers against the bar top, quickly turning when he felt a hand on his shoulder, but sighing when it was only Mav. He sat down on the stool next to him, clearing his throat, "You okay?"

Although the two men had spoken a bit about their past and were on their way to mending things, it was still slightly awkward between them. Bradley shrugged a little and took a sip of his beer, "I'm, uh, I'm waiting for someone, who I'm not sure is even gonna show up." he grunted.

Mav grinned a little, "Is this 'someone' a girl, by any chance?" Bradley nodded as he continued, "Well, I've never had the best luck with women," he chuckled, "but you want my advice? Trust the universe."

Bradley snorted, "Never took you for a spiritual guy, Mav."

Mav grinned and shrugged, patting Bradley's back as he stood, "I'm not, but in my experience, the universe always has a plan." He began to walk away but paused, "Why don't you help me fix up a plane I've been working on this weekend? Keep ya busy."

Bradley slowly began to nod, "Sure, we can do that."

Maverick smiled, giving him another pat before walking away. Bradley noticed Penny hadn't been around the bar in a while, and it dawned on him that Mav may have been there waiting for someone to show up too.

He shook his head and chugged the rest of his beer, checking his watch again, 10.59. He sighed, standing up and leaving the bar, strolling towards his bronco, ready to head home and sleep off his sadness. When he looked up to see his car in the distance, he noticed something.

Someone was leaning against the passenger door.

His footsteps quickened and once he was a few steps away he let out a breath he hadn't realised he'd been holding.

There you were, effortlessly beautiful in jeans and white t-shirt, hair down and moving with the breeze, and your eyes were on him. Exactly the way Bradley knew it should be.

As he got closer he grinned, "You're late."

You smiled and took a few steps towards him, "Shut up and kiss me Bradley."

You could deny it all you wanted but realistically, you knew. As soon as you saw him at your doorstep, hell, from the night you'd seen him at the Hard Deck, he had you. So, even if it wasn't the smart thing to do, or maybe it was, you didn't care. Bradley reached forward and grabbed your waist, his lips quickly finding yours as your hands made their way up to his hair. The kiss was gentle yet passionate, full of words that neither of you had the guts to say over the years you'd been apart. It was right then, as he kissed you against the backdrop of the sea, that you knew you'd done the right thing.

It almost felt like you were both young again, because nothing had changed. Not really.

When you both pulled away for air, he rested his forehead against yours. Of course there were conversations you both needed to have with each other, things to work out, but for now that could wait.

"I love you. So much." Bradley muttered against your lips.

You knew any important conversations didn't matter, because you'd both chosen each other and right now, that was enough.

"I love you too, Bradley."

---

A/N: Thank you so much for reading! I might do an epilogue for these two but I'm not sure yet - let me know if its something you'd wanna read!

[butchboyvi]

song lyrics that remind me of vi and her story 🥊

i wanted to include song that i think could depict her emotions, especially her pitfighter arc in s2. most of these are indie rock/alt rock/post rock songs + some ambient folk, all with very gritty and emotional lyrics. i tried to think of songs that could encapsulate the feeling of despair and loneliness shown in the “nothing to lose” clip with my own personal twist i guess. also i had in mind the latest christian linke interview, where he said that we're going to see a very different version of caitlynn, stripped down of her optimism and hopefulness, and that vi is not going to recognize her anymore, and everything that this is going to entail in their relationship.

shadowboxing - julien baker

i know you were trying to help / but you're only making it worse / tell me that i shouldn't blame myself / but you can't even imagine how badly it hurts / just to think sometimes / how i think almost all the time

so break me down / fold it over your arms / like an unloaded shotgun / dismantled and harmless / even you couldn't manage to pull / the fuse from the back of my head

work out - rainbow kitten surprise

well, there's two sides to a fair fight / and you're the third man out / i was hopeful with a slow hand / and i got gunned down / well you asked me if i could grow up / but i don't know why / for i don't know much, i'm a palm frond / dying on a front porch

sour breath - julien baker

but i shouldn't have built a house in the middle of your chest / plywood boards joined at your breast / splinter in my arm where you rest your head / checking my watch till you come to bed

kiss me goodnight with your sour breath / breaks on my face like a wave of emptiness / and when i talk just taste regret / you're everything i want and i'm all you dread

ringside - julien baker

beat myself until i'm bloody / and i’ll give you a ringside seat / you say that it's embarrassing / i’m sorry that you had to see me like that

so you could either watch me drown / or try to save me while i drag you down / want to fix it but i don't know how

bloodshot - julien baker

middle of the night, all i can see are stars / pulled 'em from my eyes and your ex-lover's arms / throw hook after hook, and if i were you / after all that i did, i'd have done it to me, too

isn't like i did it on purpose / i just forget the second i learned it / everything i get, i deserve / you whisper to me, "don't you like it when it hurts?"

lefty - title fight

bad luck never leaves / your jinx just floats around / like the taste inside your mouth / or the sound when your skull cracks / feel the growing pains / it means you're growing up too fast

sleeping with the lights on - searows

we've been watching different movies / and i've been talking to myself / i’d like to think that you knew me / better than anybody else

i know you're probably standing there / wishing that i wasn't here / you know i'd follow you anywhere / so, do you honestly believe that i would let you disappear?

appointments - julien baker

i think if i ruin this / that i know i can live with it / nothing turns out like i pictured it / maybe the emptiness is just a lesson in canvases / i think if i fail again / that i know you're still listening / maybe it's all gonna turn out alright

good news - julien baker

in the thin air, my ribs creak / like wooden dining chairs when you see me / always scared that every situation ends the same / with a blank stare / me and the tap water circling the sink drain

callous - sasami

i know it's not your fault / you were born with a spoon in your throat / and a gun in your hand and a plan for yourself / i'm not grieving / it's just a matter of time and a matter of what / and you've known since birth what you like / and i'm happy for you until my face is blue

perfecto miserable - king krule

i guess i have to go / and in my silence / it's so menacing / and when i'm left alone / it's so damaging / and in this violence / the walls cave-in / i'm not able to escape it all

cold love - rainbow kitten surprise

chained to a lie, we're the same you and i, we're the same / not the same we hurt differently, but consistent in our pain / equal and equidistant in the way we laugh / to lay bear the weight of our cold love affair / recalling the days where we were, we weren't, we were

putting the dog to sleep - the antlers

unstitch that shit i've sewn / to close up the hole that tore through my skin / well, my trust in you is a dog with a broken leg / tendons too torn to beg for you to let me back in

black dog - arlo parks

i'd lick the grief right off your lips / sometimes it seems like you won't survive this / and honestly it's terrifying

famous last words - ethel cain

my lips are still burnt from kissing your face / and feverish forehead, the blood that you waste / i'm tired of this, watching it wash out of you

cementality - king krule

enter my bed through that window / i hit zero / as guiltless loveless sins flow / through me, you threw me / i descend smoothly / my concrete bed beckons / can you hear me?

out getting ribs - king krule

and lay me out across the grey / hours i should have kept at bay / well i had no chance to get away / i can't escape my own escape / even more when it's sweet to the taste / red stairs lead sense astray / i look up and seek for faith

is it really you? - loathe

face away / deal with the pain / your own way / how could they deal with the pain? / i knew / that it was mine too / and you? / is it really you?

baldpate driver - fleshwater

and a year goes by / just as silent as a tear on a face you hide / keep chasing heaven / i'm begging for the ending

nightmares - newdad

i wish you were everything i hate in the world / not the best person in it / don't want to love 'cause then i'll misbehave / don't want to think of you and feel safe / don't want to drown if there's another way / so at the end of the day / i hope you're in my nightmares / 'cause to dream of you is unfair

to rage - daughter

i left the room destroyed / oh, you know me in more ways than that / i split the walls for warmth, i shook your town / i smashed the floors / to rage, my love, back then / well, someone had to

i'd never loved a living thing so much / i was not equipped to just / sit and watch you quit on us