aureatescars

[aureatescars]

His hips stutter into Leon's touch, rough and dry as it is, it is still everything and more Sasha has wanted. His fingers hook beneath Leon's thighs, nails digging into his pantlegs as he pulls him that much closer. The friction of Leon's fingers around him has him gasp, but it's not enough to fully rob him of his need to undress Leon further too. "Almost..." He breathes and then leans in to kiss Leon again in lieu of a proper answer. His own hands still move to undo Leon's pants and shove them out of the way, swallowing thickly when he glimpses the wet spot in Leon's underwear soon after, finding him just as desperate as himself.

Sasha's breath shudders out of him in an unsteady exhale when Leon gives him a measured, slow stroke in the meantime and it takes every single bit of his already frayed self-control to not simply begin to fuck into the circle of his hand. But at the same time it doesn't take much to get him back on track, as even pushing his hips forward just ever so slightly reminds him of the straining hardness in Leon's pants and Sasha then shifts his fingers below the waistband of Leon's underwear and tugs them down. They're still not fully undressed, but it's close enough to be able to feel eachother skin on skin.

One hand finds it's way around the back of Leon's neck then, tilting his head up for another deep and desperate kiss. The other moves to briefly lessen Leon's hold around Sasha's length, only to then take Leon's hand and lead it to encircle them both together, guiding his hand with his own. He tightens his own hold around Leon's hand just enough that the next bit of friction makes him see stars behind closed lids as their erections press together hot and heavy. And he'd worry that it is just this side of too tight, or dry for his lover to enjoy, if it wasn't for the fact that this time it's Leon who is forced to break the kiss for an appreciative moan.

Sasha blinks his eyes back open just after the first wave of heightened pleasure ebbs and is met by the dark want of Leon's pupils near fully eclipsing the brilliant blue of his eyes. It's been so long since he's last seen this sort of expression on Leon's face, and even so it is still the first time it's not entirely overshadowed by the grief or confusion of their past.

The hand on the back of Leon's neck moves to cup his cheek. His thumb brushes along his cheekbone as he tips his head back to better look into his eyes, his own full of wonder as he takes him in. "You're so beautiful." Sasha whispers before he guides them back into another, slower kiss while he begins to lead their joined hands into a slow rhythm that is maybe a bit slow for their already roughened breathing and desperate noises, but it is also everything he wants to do: take his time, truly and feel this, feel Leon, with every fibre of his being.

Leon’s weight slumping a little heavier against him, his tense shoulders unwinding just enough for Sasha to feel it beneath his lips has him breathe a little easier. Then, his breathing hitches when fingers tangle in his hair, sending a thrill down his spine. But when Leon pulls his hand away and turns in his hold soon after there is a brief moment of worry, of fear that he has overstepped the line in the sand that, while drawn by Sasha in the first place, Leon still accepted as reasonable. Maybe Sasha is too late after all, maybe Leon doesn’t actually want this anymore. Maybe he has just made this worse—

Hands find his collar, lips finds his own and Sasha’s eyes close with fluttering lids as his entire body melts into Leon’s touch in the very same way it did that first time. It’s as if they never stopped. It’s familiar and safe in a way Sasha is now aware he’s only ever felt with Leon. He’s wanted to give in to this for far longer than his guilt-ridden mind would like to admit, but he can’t stop himself from reaching for Leon now, can’t hope to do anything but let his hands alight on Leon’s hips and pull him closer and he can no longe pretend that this isn’t exactly what he has craved for way too long.

Sasha’s head tilts and he parts his lips to let his tongue run along Leon’s bottom lip. A pleasant shiver has him push for more, has him press forward until Leon’s back hits the kitchen counter and Sasha can step between his legs, can feel him close. Fingers sneak beneath Leon’s shirt again, digging deeper into his skin than they did before.

Leon welcomes him so beautifully and his heat bleeds into Sasha’s fingertips, his tongue against his own as him gasp and then groan when a thigh rubs intent against his length. He pulls away to briefly press his lips to the crook of Leon’s neck, his own breathing heavy as he attempts to gather his thoughts. However, the bop of Leon’s throat distracts him and before he knows hit he fits his mouth there instead, first lips, then a slight graze of teeth. Leon tenses beneath his touch and Sasha realizes his mistake a second too late.

He pulls back to look Leon. His gaze wavers between bright blue eyes, his lips already part on an apology, but Leon’s thigh rides up against his quickly hardening length and Sasha’s mind is wiped clean or any coherent thought.

“Please,” he says again and isn’t entirely certain what it is he is asking for, begging for at this point. His hold tightens on Leon’s hips and he rolls his hips into him, not hesitant, but rather trying desperately to keep from doing so, before ultimately failing. His hands wander further, around Leon’s form, sinking lower to cup his ass and pull him close enough that they can feel eachother through their pants.

“I need you.” He confesses helplessly and it’s such a selfish thing to say. All at once he pulls back his hands to cup Leon’s face in them instead. He pulls him into another deep kiss, one he hopes conveys all he has not yet found the proper words for, all he has been unable to show in one way or another.

[aureatescars]

Leon's weight slumping a little heavier against him, his tense shoulders unwinding just enough for Sasha to feel it beneath his lips has him breathe a little easier. Then, his breathing hitches when fingers tangle in his hair, sending a thrill down his spine. But when Leon pulls his hand away and turns in his hold soon after there is a brief moment of worry, of fear that he has overstepped the line in the sand that, while drawn by Sasha in the first place, Leon still accepted as reasonable. Maybe Sasha is too late after all, maybe Leon doesn't actually want this anymore. Maybe he has just made this worse—

Hands find his collar, lips finds his own and Sasha's eyes close with fluttering lids as his entire body melts into Leon's touch in the very same way it did that first time. It's as if they never stopped. It's familiar and safe in a way Sasha is now aware he's only ever felt with Leon. He's wanted to give in to this for far longer than his guilt-ridden mind would like to admit, but he can't stop himself from reaching for Leon now, can't hope to do anything but let his hands alight on Leon's hips and pull him closer and he can no longe pretend that this isn't exactly what he has craved for way too long.

Sasha's head tilts and he parts his lips to let his tongue run along Leon's bottom lip. A pleasant shiver has him push for more, has him press forward until Leon's back hits the kitchen counter and Sasha can step between his legs, can feel him close. Fingers sneak beneath Leon's shirt again, digging deeper into his skin than they did before.

Leon welcomes him so beautifully and his heat bleeds into Sasha's fingertips, his tongue against his own as him gasp and then groan when a thigh rubs intent against his length. He pulls away to briefly press his lips to the crook of Leon's neck, his own breathing heavy as he attempts to gather his thoughts. However, the bop of Leon's throat distracts him and before he knows hit he fits his mouth there instead, first lips, then a slight graze of teeth. Leon tenses beneath his touch and Sasha realizes his mistake a second too late.

He pulls back to look Leon. His gaze wavers between bright blue eyes, his lips already part on an apology, but Leon's thigh rides up against his quickly hardening length and Sasha's mind is wiped clean or any coherent thought.

"Please," he says again and isn't entirely certain what it is he is asking for, begging for at this point. His hold tightens on Leon's hips and he rolls his hips into him, not hesitant, but rather trying desperately to keep from doing so, before ultimately failing. His hands wander further, around Leon's form, sinking lower to cup his ass and pull him close enough that they can feel eachother through their pants.

"I need you." He confesses helplessly and it's such a selfish thing to say. All at once he pulls back his hands to cup Leon's face in them instead. He pulls him into another deep kiss, one he hopes conveys all he has not yet found the proper words for, all he has been unable to show in one way or another.

The shock of the sudden screaming and gunshots hits Sasha just as hard as it does Leon. But other than Leon who gets to his feet immediately, Sasha’s body locks up with tension and all color drains from his features as he stares at the flickering images of the tv. He barely hears Leon over the buzz in his own ears and only belatedly manages a nod, his eyes still glued to the tv.

He doesn’t even breathe until the short sequence is over and another commercial comes on, something mundane, something trivial, something Sasha can’t focus for the life of him. He comes to with a harsh gasp, his chest tight with anxiety. He has to physically turn his head to the side in order to pull his gaze away from the screen. He finds his fingers tightly curled into the coarse fabric of the couch beneath him and he has to put serious effort into relaxing himself, flexing his fingers as he blinks down at them, then back up.

Slowly, he stands. He feels nauseous, disoriented, unsteady on his feet, but all of that doesn’t matter as his mind zeroes in on one thought. Leon isn’t here. Leon isn’t here and that means he has to find him.

With one hand steadying himself against a nearby wall Sasha rises to his feet. He forces his panic down, made easier by the familiar surroundings. He is safe. He is home. He shakes his head a few times to clear it. He counts his breaths. Slowly. In and out. In and out. For an agonizingly long time it doesn’t help at all, and he can still see his vision blurring at the edges, zeroing in on his hand now clawing at the wall. He thinks of Leon again and his chest tightens. He has to go find him.

And so he does.

It doesn’t take him long either, although in his own state of mind it takes him longer than it should to really see what is going on. Leon’s trembling form, his shoulders rounded and head hung low is something Sasha hasn’t seen in a long time. Not like this. There have been bad days, sometimes for both of them, sometimes for one or the other. But he hasn’t seen Leon completely out of it like this since that day at the motel where he came to his room only to find Leon staring blankly at his handgun. Sasha can’t see his face as he slowly approaches from behind, but he doesn’t have to to know that Leon is wearing that same expression right now.

Sasha thinks he speaks Leon’s name out loud, a few times even. He recognizes the way his mouth moves aeound the syllables, but blood is rushing so loudly in Sasha’s ears that he cant tell for certain, not until he is close enough to touch, to cover one of Leon’s hands with one of his own, the other alighting on his waist as he presses closer. Leon starts under his touch, but Sasha expects it, and just holds on tighter. His sharp inhale is the first real sound that makes it through the haze of Sasha’s own mind.

He presses himself closer, one arm curling around Leon’s middle now, the other hand pushing his fingers between Leon’s own to intertwine them. He leans in to take in the familiar scent of his hair, the faint smell of shampoo and conditioner lingering in the soft strands. He breathes deeply to calm himself and at last. It seems to work and eventually Sasha breathes easier, feels truly safe once more. He’s safe. He’s home. And this time it’s really true. At last, Sasha’s lips find Leon’s skin as if it’s the simplest thing in the world. A gentle, barely there brush of contact against back of his neck, then another and another.

“Come back to me.” He breathes when Leon still doesn’t react. His shoulders remain locked in a tight line, a faint tremble to them still. Leon’s fingers feel cold between his own and the hand of the arm curled around Leon’s middle strays beneath the hem of his shirt. Seeking warmth, seeking contact, closeness above all else, it presses to the plane of his abdomen. The muscles jump under his touch, unmistakeably alive. His own breathing shudders against Leon’s neck.

“Leon, please.”

[aureatescars]

The shock of the sudden screaming and gunshots hits Sasha just as hard as it does Leon. But other than Leon who gets to his feet immediately, Sasha's body locks up with tension and all color drains from his features as he stares at the flickering images of the tv. He barely hears Leon over the buzz in his own ears and only belatedly manages a nod, his eyes still glued to the tv.

He doesn't even breathe until the short sequence is over and another commercial comes on, something mundane, something trivial, something Sasha can't focus for the life of him. He comes to with a harsh gasp, his chest tight with anxiety. He has to physically turn his head to the side in order to pull his gaze away from the screen. He finds his fingers tightly curled into the coarse fabric of the couch beneath him and he has to put serious effort into relaxing himself, flexing his fingers as he blinks down at them, then back up.

Slowly, he stands. He feels nauseous, disoriented, unsteady on his feet, but all of that doesn't matter as his mind zeroes in on one thought. Leon isn't here. Leon isn't here and that means he has to find him.

With one hand steadying himself against a nearby wall Sasha rises to his feet. He forces his panic down, made easier by the familiar surroundings. He is safe. He is home. He shakes his head a few times to clear it. He counts his breaths. Slowly. In and out. In and out. For an agonizingly long time it doesn't help at all, and he can still see his vision blurring at the edges, zeroing in on his hand now clawing at the wall. He thinks of Leon again and his chest tightens. He has to go find him.

And so he does.

It doesn't take him long either, although in his own state of mind it takes him longer than it should to really see what is going on. Leon's trembling form, his shoulders rounded and head hung low is something Sasha hasn't seen in a long time. Not like this. There have been bad days, sometimes for both of them, sometimes for one or the other. But he hasn't seen Leon completely out of it like this since that day at the motel where he came to his room only to find Leon staring blankly at his handgun. Sasha can't see his face as he slowly approaches from behind, but he doesn't have to to know that Leon is wearing that same expression right now.

Sasha thinks he speaks Leon's name out loud, a few times even. He recognizes the way his mouth moves aeound the syllables, but blood is rushing so loudly in Sasha's ears that he cant tell for certain, not until he is close enough to touch, to cover one of Leon's hands with one of his own, the other alighting on his waist as he presses closer. Leon starts under his touch, but Sasha expects it, and just holds on tighter. His sharp inhale is the first real sound that makes it through the haze of Sasha's own mind.

He presses himself closer, one arm curling around Leon's middle now, the other hand pushing his fingers between Leon's own to intertwine them. He leans in to take in the familiar scent of his hair, the faint smell of shampoo and conditioner lingering in the soft strands. He breathes deeply to calm himself and at last. It seems to work and eventually Sasha breathes easier, feels truly safe once more. He's safe. He's home. And this time it's really true. At last, Sasha's lips find Leon's skin as if it's the simplest thing in the world. A gentle, barely there brush of contact against back of his neck, then another and another.

"Come back to me." He breathes when Leon still doesn't react. His shoulders remain locked in a tight line, a faint tremble to them still. Leon's fingers feel cold between his own and the hand of the arm curled around Leon's middle strays beneath the hem of his shirt. Seeking warmth, seeking contact, closeness above all else, it presses to the plane of his abdomen. The muscles jump under his touch, unmistakeably alive. His own breathing shudders against Leon's neck.

"Leon, please."

“I think the name Leon is plenty cool.” Sasha answers and nudges Leon in the side with his elbow to shoo that sense of selfdeprecation away. It’s plain as day that Sherry looks up to Leon, and Leon in turn seems to understand her on a level that’s beyond Sasha, or even Claire. With Claire having left earlier last month, Sherry at first receeded back into her shell and it took quite a bit of prodding for her to open back up. Leon’s been there for her a lot during that time, and it’s been exactly what she needed. Someone to hold on to. Sasha tries to be what she needs, too, especially after promising it to her and Claire that he’d stay here with her. But again, Leon just seemed to know in some way, how to approach, how to give her space, how to nudge her when she needed it, too. Looking at it now Sasha thinks that he may have gone about it… not in the wrong way necessarily, but in the way he was used to from before, friendly and tentative, but also with a certain amount of distance. He approached Sherry as a teacher but what she really needs right now is a parent, and Leon fits himself into that role quite well, even though Sasha isn’t sure if Leon is aware of it just yet.

Sasha thinks about bringing it up to Leon, but something else corsses his mind then. Sasha ends up looking a tad confused. “Leon Junior?” He tilts is head. “I thought she named him Mr. Whiskers.” Leon gives no answer beside a look that borders on defeated and Sasha blinks at him, even more confused. Then, he slowly puts the jumble of names together in his head and ultimately speaks them out loud. “Mr. Leon Junior Whiskers? …or is it Mr. Leon Whiskers Junior?” Leon sighs deeply and Sasha has to bite down on his lower lip to keep himself from laughing out loud. He doesn’t fully succeed and he’s still quietly giggling by the time they make their way over to their home.

By the time they step inside the house Sasha finds his wrist held by warm fingers and he turns to face Leon, a small smile on his own face as he takes in Leon’s expression. His mood seems much improved from before, but Sasha’s had enough time to familiarize himself with Leon’s tells that he knows he’s far from alright. Still, the warmth and gratitude in his gaze eases some of Sasha’s worries and when their hands find their way into an easy and familiar tangle, Sasha’s attention briefly flickers to the curve of Leon’s lips as he speaks. It takes him a moment to pull his gaze back up. A sense of warmth and comfort overcomes him at finding Leon looking so much more at ease, but then it is replaced by that nigh familiar feeling of anticipation they’ve experienced far too often without anything ever coming of it. Sasha knows it’s his doing most of all, despite Leon having agreed to give both of them time to adjust. Sasha isn’t certain if it’s still too early, but he cannot deny his feelings an longer, no matter the amount of guilt and uncertainty that comes with falling for Leon in such a short amount of time.

Sasha is about to pull him closer, to finally give into the urge to wrap his arms around him properly after having refrained from it while they were in public. Maybe he’d finally find the courage and seize the right moment to talk. To really talk. But before he can do anything of the like, a sound from outside startles them both and Leon pulls away before Sasha can do anything about it. Sasha’s lips still part, not wanting to let the moment disperse just yet. “Leon—”

But when Leon stops to look at him once more, Sasha can read the defeat from before just a plainly as he could see it infront of the police station. Maybe it’s not the right moment after all, maybe tomorrow would be a better choice, when Leon’s frustration about earlier isn’t as palpable, his disappointment not so recent. Yes, tomorrow. Tomorrow might be better…Sasha shakes his head. “Nevermind.”

He still takes a few steps closer and a hand gently finds one of Leon’s again after they’re done undoing their coats and putting away their things. Together they make their way to the living room and the couch and it doesn’t take them long to lean into eachother a little more while they browse the channels, sides pressed together, Leon’s head tucked against Sasha’s shoulder. They settle on some random movie neither of them have seen before. It seems like a romcom of some kind, so they leave it on. At some point, Sasha detangles their fingers and moves his arm around Leon, his thumb brushing absentmindedly along Leon’s shoulder as they watch in silence.

[aureatescars]

"I think the name Leon is plenty cool." Sasha answers and nudges Leon in the side with his elbow to shoo that sense of selfdeprecation away. It's plain as day that Sherry looks up to Leon, and Leon in turn seems to understand her on a level that's beyond Sasha, or even Claire. With Claire having left earlier last month, Sherry at first receeded back into her shell and it took quite a bit of prodding for her to open back up. Leon's been there for her a lot during that time, and it's been exactly what she needed. Someone to hold on to. Sasha tries to be what she needs, too, especially after promising it to her and Claire that he'd stay here with her. But again, Leon just seemed to know in some way, how to approach, how to give her space, how to nudge her when she needed it, too. Looking at it now Sasha thinks that he may have gone about it... not in the wrong way necessarily, but in the way he was used to from before, friendly and tentative, but also with a certain amount of distance. He approached Sherry as a teacher but what she really needs right now is a parent, and Leon fits himself into that role quite well, even though Sasha isn't sure if Leon is aware of it just yet.

Sasha thinks about bringing it up to Leon, but something else corsses his mind then. Sasha ends up looking a tad confused. "Leon Junior?" He tilts is head. "I thought she named him Mr. Whiskers." Leon gives no answer beside a look that borders on defeated and Sasha blinks at him, even more confused. Then, he slowly puts the jumble of names together in his head and ultimately speaks them out loud. "Mr. Leon Junior Whiskers? ...or is it Mr. Leon Whiskers Junior?" Leon sighs deeply and Sasha has to bite down on his lower lip to keep himself from laughing out loud. He doesn't fully succeed and he's still quietly giggling by the time they make their way over to their home.

By the time they step inside the house Sasha finds his wrist held by warm fingers and he turns to face Leon, a small smile on his own face as he takes in Leon's expression. His mood seems much improved from before, but Sasha's had enough time to familiarize himself with Leon's tells that he knows he's far from alright. Still, the warmth and gratitude in his gaze eases some of Sasha's worries and when their hands find their way into an easy and familiar tangle, Sasha's attention briefly flickers to the curve of Leon's lips as he speaks. It takes him a moment to pull his gaze back up. A sense of warmth and comfort overcomes him at finding Leon looking so much more at ease, but then it is replaced by that nigh familiar feeling of anticipation they've experienced far too often without anything ever coming of it. Sasha knows it's his doing most of all, despite Leon having agreed to give both of them time to adjust. Sasha isn't certain if it's still too early, but he cannot deny his feelings an longer, no matter the amount of guilt and uncertainty that comes with falling for Leon in such a short amount of time.

Sasha is about to pull him closer, to finally give into the urge to wrap his arms around him properly after having refrained from it while they were in public. Maybe he'd finally find the courage and seize the right moment to talk. To really talk. But before he can do anything of the like, a sound from outside startles them both and Leon pulls away before Sasha can do anything about it. Sasha's lips still part, not wanting to let the moment disperse just yet. "Leon—"

But when Leon stops to look at him once more, Sasha can read the defeat from before just a plainly as he could see it infront of the police station. Maybe it's not the right moment after all, maybe tomorrow would be a better choice, when Leon's frustration about earlier isn't as palpable, his disappointment not so recent. Yes, tomorrow. Tomorrow might be better... Sasha shakes his head. "Nevermind."

He still takes a few steps closer and a hand gently finds one of Leon's again after they're done undoing their coats and putting away their things. Together they make their way to the living room and the couch and it doesn't take them long to lean into eachother a little more while they browse the channels, sides pressed together, Leon's head tucked against Sasha's shoulder. They settle on some random movie neither of them have seen before. It seems like a romcom of some kind, so they leave it on. At some point, Sasha detangles their fingers and moves his arm around Leon, his thumb brushing absentmindedly along Leon's shoulder as they watch in silence.

Leon won’t meet his eyes after that very brief moment of looking up in which Sasha could read the pain and unsteadiness in his gaze. A hollow feeling settles in his gutt when Leon pulls away, a sense of failure, too. However, when Leon makes an effort to change the topic Sasha goes along with it. He holds his tongue about normally not being overly fond of sweet things. Although he has to admit that since that first day at the diner a few weeks ago he has become partial to the brownies with icecream they serve, which are just about the sweetest thing he’s tasted since coming to the US. So, maybe it’s just a matter of finding sweet things he doesn’t mind as much.

“Lets get a few and see which we like best.” Sasha suggests while they make their way over to the counter. “I’ll even let you pay this time.” He says and hopes the joke lands the way he wants it to, but just to be sure he gently nudges Leon in the side with his elbow as he takes in the display. Thankfully, he doesn’t get an annoyed scowl in turn, but rather something closer to that pout that Leon’s lips pull into when he isn’t exactly pleased with Sasha, but still able to take the jab. Sasha in turn can’t help but smile, not because he enjoys Leon furrowing his brows at him, but rather because this moment is one of many that make him feel …normal, which is a blessing after all they’ve endured.

Leon is just about the only reason for anything good happening in Sasha’s life of late, Sherry being a close second. They’ve overcome so much together, but Sasha is painfully aware that their progress won’t always be linear. The moment at the police station is proof of that. But he’s still grateful to be able to be here, to be able to show that he doesn’t just cherish Leon’s presence when he’s the one supporting him, but that he is capable of being there for Leon, too. Sasha wants to be safe for him in the same way Leon’s proven to be for him over and over.

Sasha doesn’t push for anything right now. Despite being able to see the darkness dimming Leon’s usually bright eyes. The urge to pull Leon into a hug and hold him until he seems less burdened by it all is strong, but he’s aware of where they are and whatever well meaning display of affection he’d offer might make Leon uncomfortable at best or at worst cause him to break down when Sasha knows he’s trying so hard to keep it together.

It will have to wait until later.

So, instead of pushing, Sasha keeps the conversation light as he can while also trying to keep their stay here as brief as possible. It’s slow progress, but eventually he notes the worst of the tension slowly draining from Leon’s form and it has Sasha breathe easier as well.They settle on quite a few things. Rather than just some plain donuts they get a whole box of special donuts with a wide plethora of different decorations. Some with caramel, some with colorful glaze and fruit jam inside, and some with so much chocolate toppings on there it hardly looks like a donut anymore.

“Oh, and one of these.” Sasha says at the very end of their order and points at one of the more colorful ones. This one is decorated to look like a little cartoon lion. He turns to Leon. “For Sherry.” Sasha says when Leon tilts his head at him. “Lets stop by Marie and Dave’s on our way home. I wanted to talk to Marie about a few last things we need to enrol Sherry at the school.” Admittedly, t’s a bit of a ruse to get Leon and Sherry in the same room after what happened earlier, because no matter what, the little girl never fails to make Leon smile. And she, much like Sasha, is one of the people that made it out of that hell alongside Leon. Maybe seeing her would help to get a sense of the good that’s come of it all, even if it still hurts to think of all they’ve lost.

Sasha’s brows furrow. “But then we’ll have to get Marie and Dave some, too…” He turns back to the display. They’re stumped for a moment on what to get them before the person behind the counter perks up and asks about the two, after being told who they’re talking about she smiles and points them towards some pastries the elderly couple often defaults to when coming to the store.

…And that is the story of how Leon and Sasha leave the local deli with a lot more sweet treats they’d initially anticipated.

The cold hits them a lot harder after leaving the overheated store, but at the very least it means the chocolatey treats wouldn’t melt while they made their way back to their street. As previously discussed they make their way over to Marie and Dave’s furst. Marie is the one to open the door, and she promptly calls out for Sherry when she realizes it’s the two of them.

Sherry hugs Sasha first, as he is the one closest to the stairs when she comes running down from her room, but then when its time to greet Leon she takes one look at him and the hug that follows is a lot tighter, and a lot longer, too. Sasha has to swallow thickly when Leon picks her up and turns away from where Marie is currently taking the treats to the kitchen, hiding the glassy look of his eyes in Sherry’s blond hair as he holds her close.

Sasha goes to distract Marie while Leon and Sherry share their moment by doing as he said earlier. He tells her about a few things they’d have to get sorted for Sherry to attend school as soon as the new school year starts. It’s still a ways off, but it’s best to get these things settled ahead of time. Especially since he is hoping to be able to get her into the class he’ll be teaching.

Sasha doesn’t realize how tense he is until Leon and Sherry ultimately join them and his body releases all of the tension at once when he sees Leon smile, Sherry’s hand in his until she moves to sit at the table. Sasha smiles as well when her face lights up at seeing the donut with the lion design. They stay maybe an hour, for a cup of tea and at least one of the treats they bought.Marie tells them that Dave is out of town until the evening but she assures them he’ll love it.

Sasha and Leon say their goodbyes not long after and Sherry gives each of them a hug once more. Marie realizes that,. distracted as they were, they left the box with the remainder of the sweets they meant to take home on the kitchen table and Marie and Leon walk back in to get it, talking while they do so. Sasha still leans down to embrace Sherry so they’d be able to leave once Leon returns.

“You have to give him a hug later, too, okay?” The little girl asks in a whispered tone and Sasha blinks at her after pulling away. “More than one even. He really needs it today.” She says with such conviction that Sasha has to chuckle. “I’ll take care of him.” Sasha says.“Promise?” Sherry asks, even though it’s not really a question at all. It almost sounds like an order. She holds up her pinky and Sasha hooks his own around it without hesitation. “Promise.” He vows and Sherry nods, satisfied.

“What kind of conspiracy is going in here?” Marie’s voice sounds from the door and Sasha straightens himself up just as Sherry singsongs “Nothing~” And then she dashes back upstairs after Sasha and Leon say goodbye to Marie as well. After the door closes behind them it seems oddly quiet in the street.

“Sherry seems to be doing well.” Sasha says once they begin walking down the road towards their own home. “I’m glad.”

[aureatescars]

Leon won't meet his eyes after that very brief moment of looking up in which Sasha could read the pain and unsteadiness in his gaze. A hollow feeling settles in his gutt when Leon pulls away, a sense of failure, too. However, when Leon makes an effort to change the topic Sasha goes along with it. He holds his tongue about normally not being overly fond of sweet things. Although he has to admit that since that first day at the diner a few weeks ago he has become partial to the brownies with icecream they serve, which are just about the sweetest thing he's tasted since coming to the US. So, maybe it's just a matter of finding sweet things he doesn't mind as much.

"Lets get a few and see which we like best." Sasha suggests while they make their way over to the counter. "I'll even let you pay this time." He says and hopes the joke lands the way he wants it to, but just to be sure he gently nudges Leon in the side with his elbow as he takes in the display. Thankfully, he doesn't get an annoyed scowl in turn, but rather something closer to that pout that Leon's lips pull into when he isn't exactly pleased with Sasha, but still able to take the jab. Sasha in turn can't help but smile, not because he enjoys Leon furrowing his brows at him, but rather because this moment is one of many that make him feel ...normal, which is a blessing after all they've endured.

Leon is just about the only reason for anything good happening in Sasha's life of late, Sherry being a close second. They've overcome so much together, but Sasha is painfully aware that their progress won't always be linear. The moment at the police station is proof of that. But he's still grateful to be able to be here, to be able to show that he doesn't just cherish Leon's presence when he's the one supporting him, but that he is capable of being there for Leon, too. Sasha wants to be safe for him in the same way Leon's proven to be for him over and over.

Sasha doesn't push for anything right now. Despite being able to see the darkness dimming Leon's usually bright eyes. The urge to pull Leon into a hug and hold him until he seems less burdened by it all is strong, but he's aware of where they are and whatever well meaning display of affection he'd offer might make Leon uncomfortable at best or at worst cause him to break down when Sasha knows he's trying so hard to keep it together.

It will have to wait until later.

So, instead of pushing, Sasha keeps the conversation light as he can while also trying to keep their stay here as brief as possible. It's slow progress, but eventually he notes the worst of the tension slowly draining from Leon's form and it has Sasha breathe easier as well. They settle on quite a few things. Rather than just some plain donuts they get a whole box of special donuts with a wide plethora of different decorations. Some with caramel, some with colorful glaze and fruit jam inside, and some with so much chocolate toppings on there it hardly looks like a donut anymore.

"Oh, and one of these." Sasha says at the very end of their order and points at one of the more colorful ones. This one is decorated to look like a little cartoon lion. He turns to Leon. "For Sherry." Sasha says when Leon tilts his head at him. "Lets stop by Marie and Dave's on our way home. I wanted to talk to Marie about a few last things we need to enrol Sherry at the school." Admittedly, t's a bit of a ruse to get Leon and Sherry in the same room after what happened earlier, because no matter what, the little girl never fails to make Leon smile. And she, much like Sasha, is one of the people that made it out of that hell alongside Leon. Maybe seeing her would help to get a sense of the good that's come of it all, even if it still hurts to think of all they've lost.

Sasha's brows furrow. "But then we'll have to get Marie and Dave some, too..." He turns back to the display. They're stumped for a moment on what to get them before the person behind the counter perks up and asks about the two, after being told who they're talking about she smiles and points them towards some pastries the elderly couple often defaults to when coming to the store.

...And that is the story of how Leon and Sasha leave the local deli with a lot more sweet treats they'd initially anticipated.

The cold hits them a lot harder after leaving the overheated store, but at the very least it means the chocolatey treats wouldn't melt while they made their way back to their street. As previously discussed they make their way over to Marie and Dave's furst. Marie is the one to open the door, and she promptly calls out for Sherry when she realizes it's the two of them.

Sherry hugs Sasha first, as he is the one closest to the stairs when she comes running down from her room, but then when its time to greet Leon she takes one look at him and the hug that follows is a lot tighter, and a lot longer, too. Sasha has to swallow thickly when Leon picks her up and turns away from where Marie is currently taking the treats to the kitchen, hiding the glassy look of his eyes in Sherry's blond hair as he holds her close.

Sasha goes to distract Marie while Leon and Sherry share their moment by doing as he said earlier. He tells her about a few things they'd have to get sorted for Sherry to attend school as soon as the new school year starts. It's still a ways off, but it's best to get these things settled ahead of time. Especially since he is hoping to be able to get her into the class he'll be teaching.

Sasha doesn't realize how tense he is until Leon and Sherry ultimately join them and his body releases all of the tension at once when he sees Leon smile, Sherry's hand in his until she moves to sit at the table. Sasha smiles as well when her face lights up at seeing the donut with the lion design. They stay maybe an hour, for a cup of tea and at least one of the treats they bought. Marie tells them that Dave is out of town until the evening but she assures them he'll love it.

Sasha and Leon say their goodbyes not long after and Sherry gives each of them a hug once more. Marie realizes that,. distracted as they were, they left the box with the remainder of the sweets they meant to take home on the kitchen table and Marie and Leon walk back in to get it, talking while they do so. Sasha still leans down to embrace Sherry so they'd be able to leave once Leon returns.

"You have to give him a hug later, too, okay?" The little girl asks in a whispered tone and Sasha blinks at her after pulling away. "More than one even. He really needs it today." She says with such conviction that Sasha has to chuckle. "I'll take care of him." Sasha says. "Promise?" Sherry asks, even though it's not really a question at all. It almost sounds like an order. She holds up her pinky and Sasha hooks his own around it without hesitation. "Promise." He vows and Sherry nods, satisfied.

"What kind of conspiracy is going in here?" Marie's voice sounds from the door and Sasha straightens himself up just as Sherry singsongs "Nothing~" And then she dashes back upstairs after Sasha and Leon say goodbye to Marie as well. After the door closes behind them it seems oddly quiet in the street.

"Sherry seems to be doing well." Sasha says once they begin walking down the road towards their own home. "I'm glad."

The walk is pleasant enough in the beginning, Sasha doesn’t mind the silence and because there’s enough sunlight for their surroundings to distract him as they make their way towards the police station he doesn’t realize at first that it might be different for Leon. Not until they come within close distance of the precinct and Sasha is captured by a sense of deja vu, that has him stop right beside Leon. He should have known that it would still get to him, standing before a building reminiscent of the infested nightmare prison the police station in Raccoon City turned out to be. With his throat feeling tight and his shoulders lined with tension he finally thinks to really take a look at Leon when he sees a sudden movement from his periphery.

Sasha realizes with quickly mounting concern that Leon looks a lot more pale now than when they left home half an hour ago and the way he’s turning away from the building and his nervous raking of a hand through his hair is enough to convince Sasha that something is very wrong.

The curse and roughened edge of Leon’s voice are what finally cause Sasha to reach for him. He places a gentle hand between his shoulderblades, anticipating the startled reaction he receives at first, before he tries again and begins running a thumb slowly over the fabric of Leon’s jacket, just firmly enough to be felt. “Hey,” he says quietly. “It’s alright.” Despite his best efforts his own words come out a bit shaky, too, but he pushes all of his own reservations and nerves about the situation aside. Leon needs him right now. “You don’t have to do this today. We can try again some other time.”

He steps in just enough to be able to curl his arm around Leon’s shoulders next, it’s not quite a hug as he feels their current surroundings are not really suited for the intimacy of it, but he still pulls him a little closer against his side. It worries him that Leon feels tense and far colder than he should even with the chill of the weather. Sasha notes that Leon’s not wearing a scarf, and while the pullover he is wearing is high rising, Sasha still frowns.

He pulls away again and undoes the scarf he wrapped around his own neck earlier. He steps around Leon who still won’t meet his eyes, but Sasha hopes that this will help at least a little bit. “Here,” he says and begins wrapping his scarf loosely around Leon’s neck. He briefly looks around for the deli Leon mentioned earlier. “You said there’s a store around here, right?” He ties the scarf and smoothes it out with a lingering touch. “Let’s get out of the cold?” He asks, tone hopeful as he makes his clumsy effort to distract Leon.

[aureatescars]

The walk is pleasant enough in the beginning, Sasha doesn't mind the silence and because there's enough sunlight for their surroundings to distract him as they make their way towards the police station he doesn't realize at first that it might be different for Leon. Not until they come within close distance of the precinct and Sasha is captured by a sense of deja vu, that has him stop right beside Leon. He should have known that it would still get to him, standing before a building reminiscent of the infested nightmare prison the police station in Raccoon City turned out to be. With his throat feeling tight and his shoulders lined with tension he finally thinks to really take a look at Leon when he sees a sudden movement from his periphery.

Sasha realizes with quickly mounting concern that Leon looks a lot more pale now than when they left home half an hour ago and the way he's turning away from the building and his nervous raking of a hand through his hair is enough to convince Sasha that something is very wrong.

The curse and roughened edge of Leon's voice are what finally cause Sasha to reach for him. He places a gentle hand between his shoulderblades, anticipating the startled reaction he receives at first, before he tries again and begins running a thumb slowly over the fabric of Leon's jacket, just firmly enough to be felt. "Hey," he says quietly. "It's alright." Despite his best efforts his own words come out a bit shaky, too, but he pushes all of his own reservations and nerves about the situation aside. Leon needs him right now. "You don't have to do this today. We can try again some other time."

He steps in just enough to be able to curl his arm around Leon's shoulders next, it's not quite a hug as he feels their current surroundings are not really suited for the intimacy of it, but he still pulls him a little closer against his side. It worries him that Leon feels tense and far colder than he should even with the chill of the weather. Sasha notes that Leon's not wearing a scarf, and while the pullover he is wearing is high rising, Sasha still frowns.

He pulls away again and undoes the scarf he wrapped around his own neck earlier. He steps around Leon who still won't meet his eyes, but Sasha hopes that this will help at least a little bit. "Here," he says and begins wrapping his scarf loosely around Leon's neck. He briefly looks around for the deli Leon mentioned earlier. "You said there's a store around here, right?" He ties the scarf and smoothes it out with a lingering touch. "Let's get out of the cold?" He asks, tone hopeful as he makes his clumsy effort to distract Leon.

Sasha has been annoyed by Leon’s stubbornness before, and frustrated with him being headstrong when Sasha is just trying to help, but it’s usually because neither clashes well with his own temperament. Right now it’s not annoyance he feels at Leon cutting him off before he can offer him some sort of out, in fact it’s quite the opposite. Sometimes Leon’s stubbornness can be endearing, when he’s technically unwilling to do something, but also unhappy with himself about not doing what’s necessary. It’s funny how Sasha is able to pick out the signs of that inner tug of war Leon is playing with himself at times. But it’s no different from when Sasha gets lost in his own head and Leon makes an effort to pull him out of it.

He’s further pacified by the small touch of Leon’s hand and the prolonged contact of their hands after. They haven’t really touched much today, and Sasha is acutely aware of that. Since they disentangled themselves from eachother this morning there hasn’t been much of a reason to reach for Leon, and once they’ve gone a few hours without Sasha isn’t sure how to initiate that anymore. With the most acute repercussions of their shared trauma slowly fading into the obscurity of their minds there aren’t many “excuses” to seek eachother out.

But Sasha has found that he really wants to carry the comfort of sharing a bed into their daily life. He is still unsure of how to handle what their relationship has become since Raccoon City, but he can’t ignore the fact that what he is feeling for Leon is getting stronger every day and he cannot keep lying to himself and pretend that it isn’t becoming apparent that it’s so very close to what he felt for Irina.

He just doesn’t know how to bring it up after having been the one to ask for more time, for distance and a lack of expectations. Leon has giving him all of that and Sasha knows he would continue to do so. It might be better, too, to keep waiting they’re still adjusting to their new life after all. But despite the cautious arguments of his rational side, Sasha can’t deny that, whenever he imagines his future these days, Leon is a part of it…

…He should tell him that. It’s not a new notion by any means. With little else to do but wait for his ribs to heal and the date of his first day of work to arrive he thought about Leon and what he means to him a lot. And he’s come to the conclusion that he isn’t content with a purely platonic relationship between them, that he’d never be content with that.

He is still holding Leon’s hand in his own when he finally reemerges from his thoughts and finds himself confronted with a raised eyebrow. Sasha shakes his head. Now is not the time. So, he gives Leon’s hand a small squeeze and then reluctantly pulls away again.

Sasha finishes his coffee and it doesn’t take long for them to get ready and out the door. Despite the fact that it’s quickly getting colder with winter fast approaching, the sun is standing high in the clear blue sky. They still burry their hands into their jacket pockets as they walk. To ward off the cold for one, but in Sasha’s case also because he has a hard time not simply reaching for Leon’s hand to reassure him after all when he notices the small line forming more prominently between his brows the closer they get to the precinct. The police station doesn’t look too much like the one in Raccoon, but it is a building of similar age and style. Sasha can’t find any words of reassurance that Leon would accept, or that wouldn’t ring hollow when even he himself can feel the sense of dread crawl closer as they make their approach, but he does quietly bump their shoulders together nonetheless.

I’m here. He tries to convey. You’re not alone.

[aureatescars]

Sasha has been annoyed by Leon's stubbornness before, and frustrated with him being headstrong when Sasha is just trying to help, but it's usually because neither clashes well with his own temperament. Right now it's not annoyance he feels at Leon cutting him off before he can offer him some sort of out, in fact it's quite the opposite. Sometimes Leon's stubbornness can be endearing, when he's technically unwilling to do something, but also unhappy with himself about not doing what's necessary. It's funny how Sasha is able to pick out the signs of that inner tug of war Leon is playing with himself at times. But it's no different from when Sasha gets lost in his own head and Leon makes an effort to pull him out of it.

He's further pacified by the small touch of Leon's hand and the prolonged contact of their hands after. They haven't really touched much today, and Sasha is acutely aware of that. Since they disentangled themselves from eachother this morning there hasn't been much of a reason to reach for Leon, and once they've gone a few hours without Sasha isn't sure how to initiate that anymore. With the most acute repercussions of their shared trauma slowly fading into the obscurity of their minds there aren't many "excuses" to seek eachother out.

But Sasha has found that he really wants to carry the comfort of sharing a bed into their daily life. He is still unsure of how to handle what their relationship has become since Raccoon City, but he can't ignore the fact that what he is feeling for Leon is getting stronger every day and he cannot keep lying to himself and pretend that it isn't becoming apparent that it's so very close to what he felt for Irina.

He just doesn't know how to bring it up after having been the one to ask for more time, for distance and a lack of expectations. Leon has giving him all of that and Sasha knows he would continue to do so. It might be better, too, to keep waiting they're still adjusting to their new life after all. But despite the cautious arguments of his rational side, Sasha can't deny that, whenever he imagines his future these days, Leon is a part of it...

...He should tell him that. It's not a new notion by any means. With little else to do but wait for his ribs to heal and the date of his first day of work to arrive he thought about Leon and what he means to him a lot. And he's come to the conclusion that he isn't content with a purely platonic relationship between them, that he'd never be content with that.

He is still holding Leon's hand in his own when he finally reemerges from his thoughts and finds himself confronted with a raised eyebrow. Sasha shakes his head. Now is not the time. So, he gives Leon's hand a small squeeze and then reluctantly pulls away again.

Sasha finishes his coffee and it doesn't take long for them to get ready and out the door. Despite the fact that it's quickly getting colder with winter fast approaching, the sun is standing high in the clear blue sky. They still burry their hands into their jacket pockets as they walk. To ward off the cold for one, but in Sasha's case also because he has a hard time not simply reaching for Leon's hand to reassure him after all when he notices the small line forming more prominently between his brows the closer they get to the precinct. The police station doesn't look too much like the one in Raccoon, but it is a building of similar age and style. Sasha can't find any words of reassurance that Leon would accept, or that wouldn't ring hollow when even he himself can feel the sense of dread crawl closer as they make their approach, but he does quietly bump their shoulders together nonetheless.

I'm here. He tries to convey. You're not alone.

The house is slowly becoming a proper home for them. With the weeks slowly crawling by they start making their own additions to the house. Nothing grand, as neither of them has a proper income yet, but they’re making plans, and in a way that’s almost more important. Sasha managed to get most of his affairs in order in terms of paper work and finding a way to get his diploma and teaching permit re-issued after losing it to the events of Raccoon City. And Sasha has covered most of their expenses in the past month as his savings account has a substantial amount of money in it from the time where he was still saving up for a wedding.

Leon doesn’t know this, or at the very least Sasha hasn’t told him explicitly. The thing Leon does know is that Sasha insists on covering groceries and most other things that come up the longer they live here. Doctor’s visits, medication, clothes, the works… They had a fight about it once, when they were both in a particularly bad place mentally and physically. With them both ridden by grief and guilt as they are, Sasha is surprised it didn’t happen sooner. But in the end they each apologized for the heated argument, and if they noticed they ultimately held on to eachother a little tighter that night when the fear of losing the other over a silly fight got a little too strong, neither of them brought it up.

However, Sasha still hasn’t stopped paying for most things unless Leon somehow manages to step in before he can. He hasn’t explained why he has all these savings to dig into either, but at this point he’s almost certain that Leon figured it out by himself. It likely doesn’t help with the guilt Sasha can read on his expression sometimes, but he still hasn’t brought it up in fear of another fight. This, too, would take time to figure out, but once they’re both set up with a new job things would be more evenly split, Sasha simply refuses to put any financial strain on Leon so long as he can afford it.

He learns more about Leon by the day, and it’s definitely a good thing to see who he is without the strain of an apocalypse on his shoulders, and Sasha can only imagine that it’s the same the other way around, too. Reconnecting with themselves and who they were before Raccoon has not been easy, and he isn’t sure that they’ve fully managed it just yet either, but Sasha is relieved to have learned that Leon doesn’t intend to run for the hills despite having spent a little over a month living with him and getting to know the “real” Sasha as well.

Sasha also mustered up the courage to call back home a little while ago. It took him far longer than it likely should have to let his mother know that he is alive and her tears and the absolute devastation in her voice when he told her about Irina not having made it out of the city is something he’d never forget.He didn’t tell her what happened in detail, didn’t tell her about the sacrifice Irina made to keep him and Leon alive either. Sasha kept it vague to the point where he had to bite his tongue to keep the truth from spilling out, but he still broke down on the phone in the exact way he thought he would.

Leon was there for him as he always is. He couldn’t have understood a word he said since Sasha was speaking Russian with his mother at the time, but that didn’t matter. He held his hand through the phone call, shifted close to put an arm across his back to offer support once the tears started falling. Sasha told his mother about Leon then, too. About the man who saved his life, who made it so that he had the strength to go on and he didn’t realize he was smiling a small smile until his mother said something that made him stop short.

[He means a lot to you, doesn’t he?]

[Mama…]

She’d asked the very same thing about Irina way back when, in that exact tone of voice. Sasha hung his head, guilty but not ashamed, not really, but uncertain and unable to get into all of these tangled feelings when he’d just lost Irina, when he’d just been crying for her, the tears not even fully dry.

[You should come home for Christmas.]

His mother told him, tone brokering no argument and Sasha’s heart sunk. It was a reasonable enough ask. Christmas was far enough in the future that it gave him time to heal before boarding a 15 hour flight, and to figure out how to get everything in order before that, too. He still opened his mouth to protest, to explain to her somehow that he couldn’t just leave Leon like this. They needed eachother, or at the very least, Sasha needs him. But as it turned out his mother still knew him to the point of being able to read his mind.

[Bring him with you. I want to thank him in person for saving my son’s life.]

Sasha didn’t say anything for a long moment after, taken aback by the easy acceptance and having to gather his thoughts before responding. He looked at Leon, who looked at him in turn, mildly confused. [M-Maybe for New Year’s…] Sasha ahd eventually answered and promised to bring it up to Leon soon, but when the call ultimately ended, he felt too raw and vulnerable to talk about any of this. Mostly limited by his own irrational fear that Leon would reject the idea. But Sasha knew he wouldn’t be able to handle it were it to happen.

And so, the days passed, one by one, and they took each one, one by one, and it did get… not easy, but easier with time. Sasha is aware that he still has to bring his mother’s idea up to Leon. He’s just waiting for the right moment to ask.

Leon suddenly pulls him from his thoughts, and Sasha turns his attention from his half empty coffee mug to him. “Of course,” he says, taking note of the hint of nerves on Leon’s part. He glances at the clock on the wall. It’s still early afternoon. “Do you want to go today?” He asks and watches Leon’s brows furrow. “We could pick up food from the diner afterwards.” He prods gently. “Watch a movie if one is on tonight?”

[aureatescars]

The house is slowly becoming a proper home for them. With the weeks slowly crawling by they start making their own additions to the house. Nothing grand, as neither of them has a proper income yet, but they're making plans, and in a way that's almost more important. Sasha managed to get most of his affairs in order in terms of paper work and finding a way to get his diploma and teaching permit re-issued after losing it to the events of Raccoon City. And Sasha has covered most of their expenses in the past month as his savings account has a substantial amount of money in it from the time where he was still saving up for a wedding.

Leon doesn't know this, or at the very least Sasha hasn't told him explicitly. The thing Leon does know is that Sasha insists on covering groceries and most other things that come up the longer they live here. Doctor's visits, medication, clothes, the works... They had a fight about it once, when they were both in a particularly bad place mentally and physically. With them both ridden by grief and guilt as they are, Sasha is surprised it didn't happen sooner. But in the end they each apologized for the heated argument, and if they noticed they ultimately held on to eachother a little tighter that night when the fear of losing the other over a silly fight got a little too strong, neither of them brought it up.

However, Sasha still hasn't stopped paying for most things unless Leon somehow manages to step in before he can. He hasn't explained why he has all these savings to dig into either, but at this point he's almost certain that Leon figured it out by himself. It likely doesn't help with the guilt Sasha can read on his expression sometimes, but he still hasn't brought it up in fear of another fight. This, too, would take time to figure out, but once they're both set up with a new job things would be more evenly split, Sasha simply refuses to put any financial strain on Leon so long as he can afford it.

He learns more about Leon by the day, and it's definitely a good thing to see who he is without the strain of an apocalypse on his shoulders, and Sasha can only imagine that it's the same the other way around, too. Reconnecting with themselves and who they were before Raccoon has not been easy, and he isn't sure that they've fully managed it just yet either, but Sasha is relieved to have learned that Leon doesn't intend to run for the hills despite having spent a little over a month living with him and getting to know the "real" Sasha as well.

Sasha also mustered up the courage to call back home a little while ago. It took him far longer than it likely should have to let his mother know that he is alive and her tears and the absolute devastation in her voice when he told her about Irina not having made it out of the city is something he'd never forget. He didn't tell her what happened in detail, didn't tell her about the sacrifice Irina made to keep him and Leon alive either. Sasha kept it vague to the point where he had to bite his tongue to keep the truth from spilling out, but he still broke down on the phone in the exact way he thought he would.

Leon was there for him as he always is. He couldn't have understood a word he said since Sasha was speaking Russian with his mother at the time, but that didn't matter. He held his hand through the phone call, shifted close to put an arm across his back to offer support once the tears started falling. Sasha told his mother about Leon then, too. About the man who saved his life, who made it so that he had the strength to go on and he didn't realize he was smiling a small smile until his mother said something that made him stop short.

[He means a lot to you, doesn't he?]

[Mama...]

She'd asked the very same thing about Irina way back when, in that exact tone of voice. Sasha hung his head, guilty but not ashamed, not really, but uncertain and unable to get into all of these tangled feelings when he'd just lost Irina, when he'd just been crying for her, the tears not even fully dry.

[You should come home for Christmas.]

His mother told him, tone brokering no argument and Sasha's heart sunk. It was a reasonable enough ask. Christmas was far enough in the future that it gave him time to heal before boarding a 15 hour flight, and to figure out how to get everything in order before that, too. He still opened his mouth to protest, to explain to her somehow that he couldn't just leave Leon like this. They needed eachother, or at the very least, Sasha needs him. But as it turned out his mother still knew him to the point of being able to read his mind.

[Bring him with you. I want to thank him in person for saving my son's life.]

Sasha didn't say anything for a long moment after, taken aback by the easy acceptance and having to gather his thoughts before responding. He looked at Leon, who looked at him in turn, mildly confused. [M-Maybe for New Year's...] Sasha ahd eventually answered and promised to bring it up to Leon soon, but when the call ultimately ended, he felt too raw and vulnerable to talk about any of this. Mostly limited by his own irrational fear that Leon would reject the idea. But Sasha knew he wouldn't be able to handle it were it to happen.

And so, the days passed, one by one, and they took each one, one by one, and it did get... not easy, but easier with time. Sasha is aware that he still has to bring his mother's idea up to Leon. He's just waiting for the right moment to ask.

Leon suddenly pulls him from his thoughts, and Sasha turns his attention from his half empty coffee mug to him. "Of course," he says, taking note of the hint of nerves on Leon's part. He glances at the clock on the wall. It's still early afternoon. "Do you want to go today?" He asks and watches Leon's brows furrow. "We could pick up food from the diner afterwards." He prods gently. "Watch a movie if one is on tonight?"

His breath hitches when he feels the weight of Leon’s hand on his thigh. Sensitive as his thighs are, the touch sends a sudden thrill through him, even muted as Leon’s warmth is through the thick fabric of Sasha’s sweatpants. For a moment he has trouble focussing on anything other than the weight of Leon’s palm, doesn’t process what he is saying to him either, since it seems like Leon rather suddenly decided to turn the situation to something more heated—

Except, that’s not at all what he was going for it seems, because soon after Sasha feels Leon slump a little heavier against him, his face burying against his neck in a tender but not at all wanting display of affection. In turn, Sasha forces himself to calm down and really think about what Leon just asked him, which is just as innocent an request as the point of contact is meant to be.

“Y-Yeah, I can do that.” He says, a little breathlessly.He fights down the sparks of arousal that overcame him. But as tempting as it is to just immediately settle down, there are a few things to do before they can. “But let me take a look at your shoulder first.” He says and then gently prods at Leon until the other man huffs in defeat and withdraws. Sasha immediately mourns his closeness and warmth, but he knows it’s for the best. Just a few moments longer and he’d be able to hold him again.“Come on,” he says after moving to stand, holding out a hand for Leon to take. “Let’s be quick about it.”

And they are, which either means they’re getting better and more familiar with the way of wrapping eachother up, or they’re both equally eager to get back to bed. The relief over Leon’s wound showing less signs of infection is enough to help him ignore any lingering waves of want, matter how tempting it is to just lean in and press his lips to warm skin. The still visible bruises on Leon’s chest make it easier to keep a level head as well. It’s enough to firmly remind Sasha of what they’re yet dealing with, no matter how desperately they both are trying to ignore the marks Raccoon City left behind. It doesn’t mean that Sasha can deny wanting Leon, but right now giving into the attraction they both so clearly feel is not what they need.

They need eachother, but not in this way. Not right now.

Sasha coerces Leon into brushing his teeth, too, even though at this point he looks about ready to fall asleep where he is standing and even washing his face in the bathroom sink doesn’t seem to do anything to combat the drowsiness Sasha can see in his eyes. Sasha helps him back into his shirt before he throws his own back on as well.A swell of adoration overcomes him when Leon blinks up sleepily at him and Sasha once again feels compelled to press a kiss to the top of his head before he tugs him back to bed.

Sasha reaches for the book on the bedside table and then prods at Leon until he is settled against his side, one arm stretched out over Sasha’s middle rather than holding on to his thigh like before. It gives him enough time to adjust to Leon’s breath against the skin of his neck when Leon takes a moment to just settle there again. Sasha holds him for a while after that. Both of them just finding solace in eachother. However, it turns out to not be the best position for reading, so it takes a bit of continued maneuvering for them to find a position in which they’re both comfortable and Sasha can still turn the pages of the book when he needs to.

In the end, Sasha still ends up holding Leon close enough that he is almost laying on top of him, with Sasha on his back but slightly propped up against the headboard via one of the pillows. Leon’s head rests more on Sasha’s chest than against his neck and one of Sasha’s arms comes around Leon’s shoulders, the hand of the other holds the book. Eventually one of Leon’s legs hooks over one of Sasha’s and makes the moment complete and for the first time in hours Sasha feels like he can breathe properly again.

With both of them settled beneath the blanket, Leon a reassuring weight at his side and the room illuminated with just the warm light of the bedside table lamp, there is nothing left to do but start reading. Sasha’s free hand finds its way into Leon’s hair while it’s not needed to turn the page and with one last clearing of his throat Sasha begins reading the familiar words out loud.

“In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit. Not a nasty, dirty, wet hole, filled with the ends of worms and an oozy smell, nor yet a dry, bare, sandy hole with nothing in it to sit down on or to eat: it was a hobbit-hole, and that means comfort…”

[aureatescars]

The wolf is stiff in his posture, muscles locked tight, teeth bared. He can feel the creature of the lake beneath them, sense its presence as it circles them in the depths. Whatever they've done to it, whatever made it the way it is now it leaves an ominous, sickening sensation behind, thick like molasses, and its enough to make Sasha feel sick to his stomach. Rational thought should have had him stay behind. Realistically, there is nothing he can do to help the man, at least not in terms of fighting the monster off should it come to that.

And given that he can feel it creeping closer, looking for an opening between debris, that is far more likely than the absentmindedness of his companion would suggest. He's torn on his decision of not shifting bakc when he jad the chance. He can't even properly communicate what he is sensing while in this form, but that doesn't stop him from growling louder when he senses the monster make a sudden approach. It's almost to late, too, because the wolf only just manages to whirl around and take his companion off his feet and pressing him flat on his back into the tiny boat to keep the monster's tail from knocking him off of it instead.

The wolf gets back up immediately after, eyes flashing bright with anger as he snarls and snaps at the second swoop of the monster's tail. He knows it's futile, but he won't stand for anything attacking someone he has accepted as his own. The wolf's eyes follow the monster, its fin tearing through the water at a high speed before it suddenly turns and a gaping maw of teeth races towards the small boat.

They saw it from shore earlier, but nothing could have prepared them for the true size of it. The wolf still broadens his stance, protective, ready to fight. He may be at a disadvantage in this boat, and more likely to be swallowed whole by the fiend, but that won't keep him from trying to do something—

A harpoon wizzes past his head. It impacts harshly and with a sickening wet sound in the widespread mouth of the creature, causing it to roar and dive beneath the boat. The motion causes their boat to get thrown around, ultimately collidimg with an old tree half sunken in the water. The wolf by some miracle manages to remain in the boat as it sways violently, the impact merely rattling his bones. But what he had feared earlier comes to pass as he watches his friend stumble and then fall head first into the water, the distance between him and the boat increasing with the waves.

No!

The wolf whines and begins pacing on the uneven wood. He's seconds away from shifting to his human form and simply dive into the water himself. But just as he is about to, the man comes back to the surface with a gasp and quickly makes his way back over to the boat.

The wolf makes room as best he can, moving to dig his teeth into the soaked clothing of the man to drag him back on board. He looks him over and nudges him with his snout to make sure he isn't hurt. And once he has confirmed that he is fine aside from the fact that he just fell into a freezing lake, he urges him to move, to get the boat going again. The attack on the monster may have given them some time, but it is still down there and they're without a harpoon to keep it at bay.

Sasha can sense it coming again, alerting his companion with another growl and turns his head into the direction from which he can feel unbridled rage make their way up from the depths of the lake.

The man beside him sputters and coughs but pulls himself up to sit and then stand. The wolf nearly whines again, meaning to tell him to stay low, but when he briefly turns his head to look, the young man has one of his guns drawn, a big one and aims it straight at the water. Sasha sees his eyes flicker to him, bright blue meeting amber and for a moment the wolf stops breathing and with the next breath Sasha's panic subsides and everything else becomes ...clearer.

The wolf's head snaps back around, eyes staring at the lake's surface. They can't see it, likely won't see it until it's too late, but Sasha can still feel it, the wolf's sharpened instincts making it abundantly clear where the monster is. He turns his head sharply to the side, and he feels the man behind him turn with him. Just a little longer, just a moment...

Now!

Sasha swears that he can feel the man's finger curl around the trigger before his ears pick up on the tell-tale click of the gun, before the wolf has even fully made a sound to give the signal. It's as if the other just knows to read him, relying fully on him, trusting him. For a split second this feels like pack, like home.

The creature barely surfaces before the bullet hits its mark, ripping through flesh and bone and nestling deep in the skull of the overgrown mutant. The gross body looses all tension and simply sinks back into the darkness with a rush of water throwing the boat around once more. Now, they find themselves closer to the center of the lake than at the edge and both the man as well as the wolf are breathing heavily. At the same time, Sasha feels elated, stronger and much more centered than before. It must be adrenaline, he thinks, and he turns to look at the man, expecting to be able to read similar things on his expression. But what he finds instead, is unfocused eyes and the young man losing grip on his gun. Sasha watches as he puts the thing away with trembling fingers, before he coughs violently and Sasha suddenly smells blood.

Alarmed, he pushes closer, snout tipping up to redo his earlier inspection, did he miss an injury? Did the monster get to him somehow after all? The concern only deepens when the young man drops to his knees and coughs up more blood, spitting it into the lake. Then, he falls over onto his side, loosing consciousness.

Sasha shifts before he can think better of it. It hurts after how long it's been. Bones break and retract, teeth shorten and turn less sharp. The fur recedes and with one rough cough of his own and a fullbody shiver against the chill he is no longer used to, Sasha is back to his human form, bare as the day he was born. He looks down at his hands, his arms and finds them briefly painted with a spiderweb of black lines before his werewolf nature fights the parasite down again and returns his skin to it's normal color. It's still there beneath the surface, lurking, waiting for an opening, a moment of weakness, just as the monster was, but it's nothing he can concern himself with now. He can smell it on the other man, too, stronger now than before and he figures that this is why he passed out, the parasite is growing stronger, which doesn't lessen his concern at all.

Sasha quickly makes sure the other man is still breathing and that he didn't hurt himself by falling over, but ultimately he decides he can't do anything while still on the lake and who knows if this monster was the only nightmare it held. No, they need to get to shore, to (relative) safety.

He turns to start the engine back up and with a low sound the boat makes it's way across the lake. Sasha saw the map earlier, and he's spent enough time out here to have a rough idea of where he is going. So, its not long before they make their way to a small house by the edge of the lake where he can tie the boat up and get his friend some needed rest.

It's awkward to move around on two legs rather than four, to use his hands again and operate machinery and perform tasks that need some degree of dexterity. But he manages to get them to shore and promptly begins to get the unconscious man out of the boat. He kneels in the small space and pulls the young man into his arms, worry deepening when he realizes how cold he is. His lips have turned blue, and his face now shows the telltale sign of the parasite infection Sasha is suffering from, too.

He struggles his way out of the swaying boat while holding the other in his arms, then looks around the area. It's a small boat house with no one around. Sasha listens into the distance, and even after a good minute of waiting he cannot make out any sound that would suggest danger, or even so much as another living being.

Sasha carries the man a little further in, away from the open part of the boat house an further inside. His friend still hasn't woken up, but Sasha feels him inch closer, seeking out warmth. He can't blame him for it. He sinks to the ground with the other still held against his chest. His head now nestling against the crook of his neck. The other's breathing comes in short hot bursts and Sasha has trouble keeping his thoughts together when that causes the sensitive skin of his neck to break out into goosebumps.

He fights the sensation down, and concentrates instead on the problem at hand. He can see the discomfort in his friend's expression, can feel him shiver. He looks like he's in pain and that at least Sasha can alleviate, if just slightly. He closes his eyes and breathes deeply, concentrating on taking a decent amount of pain from the man who's skill had saved both of them just now. Sasha sighs with relief when some of the tension in the other's body eases and the dark lines on his face retreat in the same way Sasha's did.

He's taken by surprise when an arm wraps itself around his shoulders and he freezes in light of everything he feels when that happens. He must be desperate to feel even an inkling of a pack bond when this is what makes him settle down so easily, but he can't help the smile that tugs at his lips and the way the wolf's instincts have him selfishly tuck his nose into the crook of the young man's neck, to breathe him in.

"I have you." He whispers, although with how rough his voice his from disuse, it might as well have been a growl. "I'll keep you safe. I promise." Sasha'd shift back soon, to keep him warm, and to spare him the confusion of figuring out what Sasha is, on top of everything else. It's better that way, he tells himself.

The wolf broadens his stance, fur at the back of his neck still standing up, making him appear even bigger than he already is. It doesn't take an expert to gauge that he doesn't like this one bit and the anxious energy bleeds into Sasha's still frazzled mind as well, instinct of the wolf and the intellect of the man battling to settle on how to handle this situation. The wolf snarls and then growls out in a low rumbling sound, but when his companion's hand burries into his fur the wolf momentarily quiets down, glancing up at the man beside him before lowering his head, allowing himself to huff out a breath and simply wait.

It's not just the wolf that's uneasy, Sasha isn't looking forward to this next part either. He's never been too fond of open water, and even though the lake lies still enough, they now know what lurks beneath. Sasha also doesn't like the idea of having to maneuver in a swaying boat on all fours. The wolf isn't meant for this. Hell, even in his human form Sasha wouldn't trust himself to hold his balance all that well in his current state.

In the end, he is given no choice in the matter. Or rather he is given one, if the other man's expression is anything to go by when they reach the boat. But Sasha doesn't give him the time to voice any sort of reassurance. He doesn't want to hear that he can stay behind, that the other man would come back.

No. Instead, Sasha pushes past his friend and (carefully) hops into the swaying boat after the man's done inspecting it. Sasha must look awkward standing there in the boat, legs a little wobbly on the swaying surface. His claws scrape uselessly over the varnished wood beneath his paws, his hind leg briefly tangling in some rope and fishing gear and other junk piled at the bottom. He struggles to find his footing for a moment longer and then his ears pin back when he sees the man still standing at the pier breathe out in what seems to be a small laugh.

The wolf lets out a gruff noise in return. A cross between an annoyed huff and a uncertain whine when the boat shakes as Leon gets in as well. It's not a noise he is particularly proud of, but it earns him another scratch behind the ears and a gentle pat down his back and somehow he already feels more steady where he is standing.

Enough so that he turns around to look out over the lake again, eyes fixing on the waves the wind is blowing across the surface. He doesn't sense that thing anywhere close to them right now, but it's definitely still there lurking in the deep, waiting to strike. The wolf tenses, ears flicking back briefly when the engine starts puttering behind him, but he doesn't take his eyes off the water's surface. There isn't much he can do right now, but if he's attentive enough he might be able to alert his companion of any impending danger before it is too late.

[aureatescars]

He breathes a quiet sigh of relief when Leon dispels any looming awkwardness immediately by telling him how agreeable he finds Sasha's offer. His comment goes as far as startling a laugh out of him in turn. "I'll keep any innuendos until after we're done eating then." He relents. It's for the best, since Sasha's mind is busy conjuring up a few very colorful scenarios as well.

Until Leon asks, in his own way, if Sasha is sure of what he is suggesting. He appreciates the out he is given, but he isn't one to say things he doesn't mean. His lips part to tell him just that, but that's when the waitress returns with their drinks and Sasha is reminded once again of where they are.

"Lets keep this discussion until after dinner as well." He says, but the darkness of his eyes matches that of Leon's. "Then I'll show you how serious I am about all of this."

With that decided, Sasha stirrs the conversation away from any sort of topic that may leave them having trouble focusing on their food. He avoids talking about the mission as well. It's not a conversation to be had in public either. So, instead of all that he ends up telling Leon about this area of town. What it has become, what it used to be, and shares a few bits and pieces of his childhood tied to it. It's been a long time since he actually lived here and this part of town, despite being located on the outskirts, is no longer as rural as it used to be back then.

"I went to school just down the road from here." He says at some point. "Not for long, though. A year, maybe two." He shrugs. "My mother took a job as a nurse in a hospital closer to the city center and we moved there." He smiles to himself as he thinks of simpler times. "That was when I met J. D. and Irina." Time has softened the edges of grief and guilt, and while that doesn't mean he doesn't miss both of them every single day, he can at least think back to those days now without tainting their memory with the darkness of his thoughts.

Sasha chuckles at Leon's choice of words and barely concealed implication, yet there is nothing but affection in his gaze as he watches Leon's lips curl into an titillating smirk when he leans forward. That is, until he feels Leon's foot apply pressure as it travels up his leg. Sasha swallows thickly, eyes darkening with want. He takes a deeper breath and has to run a hand over his face to rein himself back in as his thoughts stray to a wide variety of things Leon might have in mind for later. "The things you do to me," he mumbles into the palm of his hand, eyes ablaze as he keeps them on Leon. A look, some mildly suggestive words, that's really all it takes at this point.

Before Sasha gets too caught up in Leon's charm and does something that might end up embarrassing both of them, he decides to suggest something of his own, as a small act of revenge in a way. But not immediately. He makes a point of flipping through the menu one more time to look at the desserts page under the pretense of considering all the options, but his mind is elsewhere, busy with the curiosity that has been nagging at him the entire day.

"There is something I haven't had a chance to try yet." He says conversationally, and the only thing that suggests he's not talking about dessert at all is the way he keeps his voice deliberately low. "But you seem to enjoy it quite a bit, so..." At last, he looks up again, swallowing a bit of nerves since what he is alluding to, more so even than the night before, is uncharted territory for him. Still, he fights it down to continue playing this little game Leon started, not letting his inexperience get in the way of asking for what he wants. "If you're interested, I'd not be averse to you having me later tonight."

Before Leon has a chance to answer, or Sasha time to relish the expression of open surprise on Leon's face, they get interrupted by the waitress. She takes their orders for food and drinks. Sasha also informs her that they'll be taking some desserts home with them later and to leave one of the menus with them. She remains friendly throughout their interaction, holding his gaze most of the time, but he catches her attention shifting to Leon every now and again, even though she does realize quickly that Leon doesn't seem to understand what they're saying. She makes her retreat when all orders are jotted down and Sasha's attention shifts back to Leon at last.

He's about to comment on how Leon is turning heads wherever he goes, but it's difficult to parse the look on Leon's face when he meets his eyes again and the joke remains unvoiced in favor of Sasha circling back to what they were talking about before, feeling a little more uncertain with Leon's silence lingering. "I didn't think this would be the thing to render you speechless." In fact, it's a bit unsettling to see him this way. "That's a 'no', then?"

[aureatescars]

His breath hitches when he feels the weight of Leon's hand on his thigh. Sensitive as his thighs are, the touch sends a sudden thrill through him, even muted as Leon's warmth is through the thick fabric of Sasha's sweatpants. For a moment he has trouble focussing on anything other than the weight of Leon's palm, doesn't process what he is saying to him either, since it seems like Leon rather suddenly decided to turn the situation to something more heated—

Except, that's not at all what he was going for it seems, because soon after Sasha feels Leon slump a little heavier against him, his face burying against his neck in a tender but not at all wanting display of affection. In turn, Sasha forces himself to calm down and really think about what Leon just asked him, which is just as innocent an request as the point of contact is meant to be.

"Y-Yeah, I can do that." He says, a little breathlessly. He fights down the sparks of arousal that overcame him. But as tempting as it is to just immediately settle down, there are a few things to do before they can. "But let me take a look at your shoulder first." He says and then gently prods at Leon until the other man huffs in defeat and withdraws. Sasha immediately mourns his closeness and warmth, but he knows it's for the best. Just a few moments longer and he'd be able to hold him again. "Come on," he says after moving to stand, holding out a hand for Leon to take. "Let's be quick about it."

And they are, which either means they're getting better and more familiar with the way of wrapping eachother up, or they're both equally eager to get back to bed. The relief over Leon's wound showing less signs of infection is enough to help him ignore any lingering waves of want, matter how tempting it is to just lean in and press his lips to warm skin. The still visible bruises on Leon's chest make it easier to keep a level head as well. It's enough to firmly remind Sasha of what they're yet dealing with, no matter how desperately they both are trying to ignore the marks Raccoon City left behind. It doesn't mean that Sasha can deny wanting Leon, but right now giving into the attraction they both so clearly feel is not what they need.

They need eachother, but not in this way. Not right now.

Sasha coerces Leon into brushing his teeth, too, even though at this point he looks about ready to fall asleep where he is standing and even washing his face in the bathroom sink doesn't seem to do anything to combat the drowsiness Sasha can see in his eyes. Sasha helps him back into his shirt before he throws his own back on as well. A swell of adoration overcomes him when Leon blinks up sleepily at him and Sasha once again feels compelled to press a kiss to the top of his head before he tugs him back to bed.

Sasha reaches for the book on the bedside table and then prods at Leon until he is settled against his side, one arm stretched out over Sasha's middle rather than holding on to his thigh like before. It gives him enough time to adjust to Leon's breath against the skin of his neck when Leon takes a moment to just settle there again. Sasha holds him for a while after that. Both of them just finding solace in eachother. However, it turns out to not be the best position for reading, so it takes a bit of continued maneuvering for them to find a position in which they're both comfortable and Sasha can still turn the pages of the book when he needs to.

In the end, Sasha still ends up holding Leon close enough that he is almost laying on top of him, with Sasha on his back but slightly propped up against the headboard via one of the pillows. Leon's head rests more on Sasha's chest than against his neck and one of Sasha's arms comes around Leon's shoulders, the hand of the other holds the book. Eventually one of Leon's legs hooks over one of Sasha's and makes the moment complete and for the first time in hours Sasha feels like he can breathe properly again.

With both of them settled beneath the blanket, Leon a reassuring weight at his side and the room illuminated with just the warm light of the bedside table lamp, there is nothing left to do but start reading. Sasha's free hand finds its way into Leon's hair while it's not needed to turn the page and with one last clearing of his throat Sasha begins reading the familiar words out loud.

"In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit. Not a nasty, dirty, wet hole, filled with the ends of worms and an oozy smell, nor yet a dry, bare, sandy hole with nothing in it to sit down on or to eat: it was a hobbit-hole, and that means comfort..."

It’s not that it bothers him that Leon is wearing his clothes. In fact it’s quite the opposite. The warmth from before persists as he sees Leon shuffling around with that sheepish smile, caught out on something even he didn’t seem all that aware of in the first place. Sasha smiles too, not at all put off by the almost reluctant offer to give the shirt back. Sasha doesn’t even want it back, he’d rather have Leon wear it instead, and he doesn’t need to think too closely about why either. It’s dawning on him more and more the longer they spend time together. “No, it’s fine. Keep it on.” He says gently and then turns back to the bag to pull out one of the few other shirts that fit him. “We’ll see about the bandages after. I could use some help with my own.”

His gaze lingers on their things. They’d have to go shopping again soon, just to pick out some things that aren’t hand-me-downs or second hand emergency purchases because they don’t have the time or mental capacity to pick out anything they truly like.They’ll need things that are just theirs to find back to a sense of normalcy, he thinks. At least Sasha definitely does to not feel like a refugee, like a survivor of something horrible anymore, but like a person again.

As he pulls another dark shirt over his head, careful to not disturb his own bruised ribs too much, he realizes that they’ve lived out of their bags for too long. They need to properly unpack, to settle, to not make plans to run again. They don’t have to anymore. They are safe. It’s done. It’s over. It's—

He feels Leon’s hand against his and it snaps him out of his spiraling thoughts. He isn’t entirely sure how long he stood there staring at the bag, but since it’s been long enough to have Leon pick up on his distress he ducks his head in embarassment. He hears Leon’s stomach rumble and it’s enough to think about eating and settling down with Leon to ground himself in the moment again. He shakes his head to make Leon understand that he’s okay, or as close as he can be right now, given everything. He turns his head to briefly tangle their fingers before he withdraws and moves to sit down on the bed.

They go about settling on the bed and the smell of the food finally makes Sasha’s own stomach growl, no matter how wary he still is of Leon’s particular choice of toppings. Leon looks at him expectantly and Sasha narrows his eyes at him briefly when he realizes he is waiting for him to take the first piece. So, he does and takes a bite.

His expression shifts to one of surprise. “It’s good.” He says and the way Leon’s entire face lights up in turn makes him pause and fight down the urge to lean in and kiss that smile. Instead, he watches as Leon grabs a piece of his own and Sasha returns to eating as well. Maybe there is something to be said about the way they migrate together on the bed until they’re touching in some way. Their shoulders brush, their legs as well, and by the time they’ve finished eating Sasha feels Leon’s entire weight settle against his side. He sets the boxes aside, not caring much about where they land on the floor as long as they’re out of the way before he brings his arm around Leon, careful to not jostle his wound.

It’s quiet for a long moment before Sasha leans his own head against the top of Leon’s where he’s settled against his side. “How are you feeling?” He asks, because for all the time he’s been lost in his own thoughts he never thought to really ask about how Leon is doing. He mentioned needing help with his bandages and Sasha still intends to lend a hand, but for now he wants to offer this as well.

[aureatescars]

It's not that it bothers him that Leon is wearing his clothes. In fact it's quite the opposite. The warmth from before persists as he sees Leon shuffling around with that sheepish smile, caught out on something even he didn't seem all that aware of in the first place. Sasha smiles too, not at all put off by the almost reluctant offer to give the shirt back. Sasha doesn't even want it back, he'd rather have Leon wear it instead, and he doesn't need to think too closely about why either. It's dawning on him more and more the longer they spend time together. "No, it's fine. Keep it on." He says gently and then turns back to the bag to pull out one of the few other shirts that fit him. "We'll see about the bandages after. I could use some help with my own."

His gaze lingers on their things. They'd have to go shopping again soon, just to pick out some things that aren't hand-me-downs or second hand emergency purchases because they don't have the time or mental capacity to pick out anything they truly like. They'll need things that are just theirs to find back to a sense of normalcy, he thinks. At least Sasha definitely does to not feel like a refugee, like a survivor of something horrible anymore, but like a person again.

As he pulls another dark shirt over his head, careful to not disturb his own bruised ribs too much, he realizes that they've lived out of their bags for too long. They need to properly unpack, to settle, to not make plans to run again. They don't have to anymore. They are safe. It's done. It's over. It's—

He feels Leon's hand against his and it snaps him out of his spiraling thoughts. He isn't entirely sure how long he stood there staring at the bag, but since it's been long enough to have Leon pick up on his distress he ducks his head in embarassment. He hears Leon's stomach rumble and it's enough to think about eating and settling down with Leon to ground himself in the moment again. He shakes his head to make Leon understand that he's okay, or as close as he can be right now, given everything. He turns his head to briefly tangle their fingers before he withdraws and moves to sit down on the bed.

They go about settling on the bed and the smell of the food finally makes Sasha's own stomach growl, no matter how wary he still is of Leon's particular choice of toppings. Leon looks at him expectantly and Sasha narrows his eyes at him briefly when he realizes he is waiting for him to take the first piece. So, he does and takes a bite.

His expression shifts to one of surprise. "It's good." He says and the way Leon's entire face lights up in turn makes him pause and fight down the urge to lean in and kiss that smile. Instead, he watches as Leon grabs a piece of his own and Sasha returns to eating as well. Maybe there is something to be said about the way they migrate together on the bed until they're touching in some way. Their shoulders brush, their legs as well, and by the time they've finished eating Sasha feels Leon's entire weight settle against his side. He sets the boxes aside, not caring much about where they land on the floor as long as they're out of the way before he brings his arm around Leon, careful to not jostle his wound.

It's quiet for a long moment before Sasha leans his own head against the top of Leon's where he's settled against his side. "How are you feeling?" He asks, because for all the time he's been lost in his own thoughts he never thought to really ask about how Leon is doing. He mentioned needing help with his bandages and Sasha still intends to lend a hand, but for now he wants to offer this as well.

The hot shower definitely helps in making stiff joints and muscles feel less tense, and even the constant throbbing of his ribs feels less present once the water begins running down his body. He exhales long and drawn out, allows himself to unclench his jaw and let go off the stress of the day best he can. He doesn’t manage to let it all go just yet, but at the very least the stres headache he felt coming on earlier recedes into the background as he ducks his head beneath the spray and lets the hot water run down his neck.

He told Leon he’d be quick, and he has every intention to not keep him waiting too long, but despite this he can’t help but simply stay where he is standing and let the water wash the worst of the tension in his shoulders away. He wishes he could just turn off his mind entirely and truly relax, but no amount of peace and quiet would allow him to do so just yet. The scars on his mind are too fresh for that. The only way he can see himself find any sort of respite from what they’ve been through is by distracting himself in some way, occupy his mind with something other than memories and confusing feelings.

He should pick up a book from the shelf he saw in the hallway, he thinks. Taking a random pick from Marie’s collection might just be the distraction he needs before attempting another few hours of rest. God knows he needs it still, but right now he’s convinced that whatever sleep he would find would be riddled with the nightmares of Raccoon. However, with some luck whatever book he picks out would keep his mind from conjuring up any of that. He isn’t particularly sure of this hypothesis, but he figures it is worth a try.

It is why he finds himself standing infront of the small shelf in the hall next to the door to the bedroom as Leon makes his way upstairs. Sasha didn’t expect him to come up here again. Under the impression they’d eat downstairs, he hadn’t worried about the fact he forgot to take his sleeping clothes to the bathroom to change into after his shower. Thus, he is currently wearing only a towel loosely tied around his waist, his clothes from before slung over one arm, the other hand now holding The Hobbit by J. R. R. Tolkien.

He can’t quite interpret the look in Leon’s eyes when he meets his gaze, but it serves to make his face and ears flush nonetheless. He clears his throat to mask his embarrassment, not wanting to make this awkward. “Good idea.” He says and means it. Unexpected as Leon’s idea was there is little else he wants than return to the comfort of their— of the bedroom. “Just give me a moment to put on some clothes.”

After they make their way inside he sets the book down on the bedside table and goes to find some loose sweatpants to put on. It doesn’t take long for him to do so, using the towel to get rid of the residue moisture once be doesn’t need it to protect his modesty anymore. However, he frowns at the bag when the shirt he’s looking for next is nowhere to be found. It’s not that he has any real attachment to that one in particular, he’s just wondering where it went as he could have sworn it was here earlier…

He looks at Leon, lips parting on a question already as he straightens himself up from where he squatted down, before he stops and for once really looks at what Leon is wearing rather than just taking in his face and expression. “…Is that my shirt?” He asks when he realizes that the article of clothing hangs more than a little loose on Leon’s form.

[aureatescars]

The hot shower definitely helps in making stiff joints and muscles feel less tense, and even the constant throbbing of his ribs feels less present once the water begins running down his body. He exhales long and drawn out, allows himself to unclench his jaw and let go off the stress of the day best he can. He doesn't manage to let it all go just yet, but at the very least the stres headache he felt coming on earlier recedes into the background as he ducks his head beneath the spray and lets the hot water run down his neck.

He told Leon he'd be quick, and he has every intention to not keep him waiting too long, but despite this he can't help but simply stay where he is standing and let the water wash the worst of the tension in his shoulders away. He wishes he could just turn off his mind entirely and truly relax, but no amount of peace and quiet would allow him to do so just yet. The scars on his mind are too fresh for that. The only way he can see himself find any sort of respite from what they've been through is by distracting himself in some way, occupy his mind with something other than memories and confusing feelings.

He should pick up a book from the shelf he saw in the hallway, he thinks. Taking a random pick from Marie's collection might just be the distraction he needs before attempting another few hours of rest. God knows he needs it still, but right now he's convinced that whatever sleep he would find would be riddled with the nightmares of Raccoon. However, with some luck whatever book he picks out would keep his mind from conjuring up any of that. He isn't particularly sure of this hypothesis, but he figures it is worth a try.

It is why he finds himself standing infront of the small shelf in the hall next to the door to the bedroom as Leon makes his way upstairs. Sasha didn't expect him to come up here again. Under the impression they'd eat downstairs, he hadn't worried about the fact he forgot to take his sleeping clothes to the bathroom to change into after his shower. Thus, he is currently wearing only a towel loosely tied around his waist, his clothes from before slung over one arm, the other hand now holding The Hobbit by J. R. R. Tolkien.

He can't quite interpret the look in Leon's eyes when he meets his gaze, but it serves to make his face and ears flush nonetheless. He clears his throat to mask his embarrassment, not wanting to make this awkward. "Good idea." He says and means it. Unexpected as Leon's idea was there is little else he wants than return to the comfort of their— of the bedroom. "Just give me a moment to put on some clothes."

After they make their way inside he sets the book down on the bedside table and goes to find some loose sweatpants to put on. It doesn't take long for him to do so, using the towel to get rid of the residue moisture once be doesn't need it to protect his modesty anymore. However, he frowns at the bag when the shirt he's looking for next is nowhere to be found. It's not that he has any real attachment to that one in particular, he's just wondering where it went as he could have sworn it was here earlier...

He looks at Leon, lips parting on a question already as he straightens himself up from where he squatted down, before he stops and for once really looks at what Leon is wearing rather than just taking in his face and expression. "...Is that my shirt?" He asks when he realizes that the article of clothing hangs more than a little loose on Leon's form.

His hand alights on Leon’s waist without hesitation as he leans into the brief contact of lips to the line of his jaw before he lets him go. It doesn’t strike him as odd at all until well after he has made the call and placed their order and even then, the only thing that truly surprises him is that the smile on his face lingers without too much effort, the pain and grief alleviated just enough that it doesn’t feel like a chore to smile, if just slightly.

He looks around the kitchen for something to do, thinking that he might as well set the table while he waits for Leon to come back, but before he can, his gaze settles on the small radio sitting on the countertop. He reaches for it. Music might even serve to keep his mood in this lighter, less troubled state, but when he turns it on he realizes that the only thing on any broadcasting frequency he can find are the news. It’s not really surprising, it’s simply that time of the day.

It’s such a surreal feeling to listen to these small town news in light of what they’ve been through. Sasha even lets out an amused snort at the fact that the local police is apparently investigating a break-in at a dairy farm where someone stole a priced cow of some kind, then there is the traffic report and lastly the weather. It’s going to rain tomorrow, and then for the next few days… Of course that has his mind circle back to the fact that Raccoon City is no more, whiped off the map, just like that. He shakes his head. His hand trembles when he turns the knob again until he finally finds some music playing. He doesn’t recognize the song, but that doesn’t mean much. He’s never been all that big on music in the first place.

Leon is still in the shower. It’s been maybe five minutes and Sasha is already on the verge of following him into the bathroom just so he doesn’t have to be alone with his thoughts. He sighs deeply and forces himself to focus on the music, turning it up louder and then moves towards the kettle to make tea, to keep himself busy most of all.

Thankfully, he hears Leon call out from the hall not that long after, already feeling his chest expand on a deeper breath. He makes his way there to meet him, lips parting to say something only to freeze when he sees Leon standing there, dressed down, relaxed from his shower. “Ah…” He takes in the residue moisture on Leon’s skin, the disarray of his hair, the light flush to his cheeks. With the bruises covered and Leon looking more at ease, his eyes less dark, Sasha is overcome by a sudden flutter in his chest, a warmth takes a hold of him that isn’t at all like the want he remembers from the hotel, nor the desperation that’s fueled their thrist then. It’s in that moment that he can actually see himself get used to seeing Leon like this. He can admit that he wants it even.

He had made an effort to shake the shadows that crept up on him before coming to meet him, but as always it’s more difficult than he’d like to admit, but Leon, once again, makes it easier to bear it all. The pain, the grief, the uncertainty. With that softness in his eyes and that smile Sasha’s come to adore more and more every time it shows, even dimmed from what they’ve learned. When Leon tells him he can take over waiting for the food while he showers Sasha finds his own smile from earlier again. As he passes Leon on the way to the bathroom he gently tugs him against his side and presses a kiss to the top of his head, taking in the smell of his freshly washed hair.

The contact lasts a few seconds at best, but it smoothes the worst edges of his mind nonetheless. “I made tea.” He informs him, and then: “The pizza should be here soon, I’ll be quick.” And with that he is off to the bathroom.

[aureatescars]

His hand alights on Leon's waist without hesitation as he leans into the brief contact of lips to the line of his jaw before he lets him go. It doesn't strike him as odd at all until well after he has made the call and placed their order and even then, the only thing that truly surprises him is that the smile on his face lingers without too much effort, the pain and grief alleviated just enough that it doesn't feel like a chore to smile, if just slightly.

He looks around the kitchen for something to do, thinking that he might as well set the table while he waits for Leon to come back, but before he can, his gaze settles on the small radio sitting on the countertop. He reaches for it. Music might even serve to keep his mood in this lighter, less troubled state, but when he turns it on he realizes that the only thing on any broadcasting frequency he can find are the news. It's not really surprising, it's simply that time of the day.

It's such a surreal feeling to listen to these small town news in light of what they've been through. Sasha even lets out an amused snort at the fact that the local police is apparently investigating a break-in at a dairy farm where someone stole a priced cow of some kind, then there is the traffic report and lastly the weather. It's going to rain tomorrow, and then for the next few days... Of course that has his mind circle back to the fact that Raccoon City is no more, whiped off the map, just like that. He shakes his head. His hand trembles when he turns the knob again until he finally finds some music playing. He doesn't recognize the song, but that doesn't mean much. He's never been all that big on music in the first place.

Leon is still in the shower. It's been maybe five minutes and Sasha is already on the verge of following him into the bathroom just so he doesn't have to be alone with his thoughts. He sighs deeply and forces himself to focus on the music, turning it up louder and then moves towards the kettle to make tea, to keep himself busy most of all.

Thankfully, he hears Leon call out from the hall not that long after, already feeling his chest expand on a deeper breath. He makes his way there to meet him, lips parting to say something only to freeze when he sees Leon standing there, dressed down, relaxed from his shower. "Ah..." He takes in the residue moisture on Leon's skin, the disarray of his hair, the light flush to his cheeks. With the bruises covered and Leon looking more at ease, his eyes less dark, Sasha is overcome by a sudden flutter in his chest, a warmth takes a hold of him that isn't at all like the want he remembers from the hotel, nor the desperation that's fueled their thrist then. It's in that moment that he can actually see himself get used to seeing Leon like this. He can admit that he wants it even.

He had made an effort to shake the shadows that crept up on him before coming to meet him, but as always it's more difficult than he'd like to admit, but Leon, once again, makes it easier to bear it all. The pain, the grief, the uncertainty. With that softness in his eyes and that smile Sasha's come to adore more and more every time it shows, even dimmed from what they've learned. When Leon tells him he can take over waiting for the food while he showers Sasha finds his own smile from earlier again. As he passes Leon on the way to the bathroom he gently tugs him against his side and presses a kiss to the top of his head, taking in the smell of his freshly washed hair.

The contact lasts a few seconds at best, but it smoothes the worst edges of his mind nonetheless. "I made tea." He informs him, and then: "The pizza should be here soon, I'll be quick." And with that he is off to the bathroom.

Sasha turns when Leon does, concern furrowing his brow at the discomfort written alp over his face. Leon’s suggestion is sound and Sasha can’t help but feel the same way, his skin clammy from a few restless hours of sleep and his face still painted in the residue of salt of dried tears.

However, the first instinct he has to fight down is to protest Leon leaving him on his own, no matter how brief his absence would be. Sasha is surprised by how visceral that instinct truly is, how desperately he wants to pull Leon in closer and keep him there, despite being the one to suggest leaving the confines of the bed in the first place. He lets out a shaky sigh when Leon seemingly reads the unease within his expression and pulls him in to allow them another moment of closeness before they ultimately have to pull apart and move to stand.

“Yeah…” Sasha breathes. “I… I might do that, too after you’re done. I can take care of ordering food in the meantime.”

With that agreed on they make to stand. They’re both unsteady on their feet, that much is clear, and both shiver now that the blanket and eachother’s warmth doesn’t ward off the cold anymore.

“I’ll see if I can do anything about the chill.” Sasha says. “Turn up the heating a bit.” He can’t help the way he tugs at Leon to follow him downstairs. “But help me choose toppings before you go?” It’s a rather selfish, almost childish, suggestion meant to keep Leon by his side just those few moments longer, but he justifies it by not knowing what exactly Leon wants and fearing he’d order something that might deter him from eating when they both desperately need it. If Leon minds his request, he doesn’t show it and together they make their way downstairs.

They quickly locate the tiny pamphlet advertising the local pizza place Leon was talking about, both struggling to keep the conversation as light as possible, haunted by the news they received but a few hours ago as they are. But there is no denying their bodies are screaming for food at this point and in the end it turns out that discussing pizza toppings is the exact kind of ridiculously mundane thing they need to pull themselves back from the brink of absolute despair.

After some consideration they settle on a extra large, extra cheesy with a wide variety of toppings Sasha isn’t entirely certain about, but Leon swears will taste good and that Sasha just has to try.

This small interaction, this moment of mundane bliss, helps to disperse some of the heavy feeling of dread that hangs over them still and by the time they’ve conjured up a proper list of toppings Leon seems to be excited about Sasha can’t stop his lips from turning up into a small smile. It turns wider when he suggests getting some chicken strips just in case this pizza turns out to be an abomination and Leon’s expression turns into something that can only be described as a full on pout.

It persists when Sasha turns to the phone to dial the number of the place and ends up giving into the urge of teasing Leon about it when he squints at him with suspicion and Sasha is quite certain he knows what’s on his mind. He gently pushes at Leon’s shoulder then, even though it takes some struggling with his own need to remain close to encourage Leon to go. “Go shower, I promise I won’t change the order while you’re away…”

[aureatescars]

Sasha chuckles at Leon's choice of words and barely concealed implication, yet there is nothing but affection in his gaze as he watches Leon's lips curl into an titillating smirk when he leans forward. That is, until he feels Leon's foot apply pressure as it travels up his leg. Sasha swallows thickly, eyes darkening with want. He takes a deeper breath and has to run a hand over his face to rein himself back in as his thoughts stray to a wide variety of things Leon might have in mind for later. "The things you do to me," he mumbles into the palm of his hand, eyes ablaze as he keeps them on Leon. A look, some mildly suggestive words, that's really all it takes at this point.

Before Sasha gets too caught up in Leon's charm and does something that might end up embarrassing both of them, he decides to suggest something of his own, as a small act of revenge in a way. But not immediately. He makes a point of flipping through the menu one more time to look at the desserts page under the pretense of considering all the options, but his mind is elsewhere, busy with the curiosity that has been nagging at him the entire day.

"There is something I haven't had a chance to try yet." He says conversationally, and the only thing that suggests he's not talking about dessert at all is the way he keeps his voice deliberately low. "But you seem to enjoy it quite a bit, so..." At last, he looks up again, swallowing a bit of nerves since what he is alluding to, more so even than the night before, is uncharted territory for him. Still, he fights it down to continue playing this little game Leon started, not letting his inexperience get in the way of asking for what he wants. "If you're interested, I'd not be averse to you having me later tonight."

Before Leon has a chance to answer, or Sasha time to relish the expression of open surprise on Leon's face, they get interrupted by the waitress. She takes their orders for food and drinks. Sasha also informs her that they'll be taking some desserts home with them later and to leave one of the menus with them. She remains friendly throughout their interaction, holding his gaze most of the time, but he catches her attention shifting to Leon every now and again, even though she does realize quickly that Leon doesn't seem to understand what they're saying. She makes her retreat when all orders are jotted down and Sasha's attention shifts back to Leon at last.

He's about to comment on how Leon is turning heads wherever he goes, but it's difficult to parse the look on Leon's face when he meets his eyes again and the joke remains unvoiced in favor of Sasha circling back to what they were talking about before, feeling a little more uncertain with Leon's silence lingering. "I didn't think this would be the thing to render you speechless." In fact, it's a bit unsettling to see him this way. "That's a 'no', then?"

He's altogether too busy staring as Leon gets off the bike with fluid movements to grace Leon's comment with an answer, although he wholeheartedly agrees with the notion. Nigh hypnotized is he by the shift of the well-toned muscle he knows for a fact are hidden beneath layers of leather and fabric.

Sasha runs a hand over his face and through his hair, opening his jacket to give himself some more room to breathe. He doesn't mean to let this ravenous hunger for Leon overtake him at every turn. It's still worrying how strong it isq, but maybe not all that surprising after years of doubting that he'd be able to have anything even remotely close to what they've shared up until this point. Maybe it's all repressed frustration, emotional and sexual, that makes his desires breach the surface so violently now that he has an outlet for it.

But that doesn't explain the connection that he feels between them, or the fact that he has felt altogether more strong and settled in his skin since Leon stepped back into his life. So, maybe it is just Leon that inspires such a shift in him. After all, when was the last time Sasha actually had a day where he could let loose, and not become exhausted halfway through? Maybe it's all it took for someone to push him to his limits to rediscover long hidden reserves.

He returns to his bike to retrieve his cane, out of habit more than anything else. He hardly feels like he needs it to walk right now, but that is mostikely the lingering adrenaline from the ride making him feel elated and dulling any and all sensations of pain. Sasha is almost certain all of this will come and bite him in the ass later on, but right now he couldn't care less as he follows Leon into the restaurant, appreciating his choice of a table for the exact same reasons as his lover. Old instincts are not easily shed, even in mundane circumstances and besides, as men with their respective occupations foresight is always better than a bullet between the eyes.

He pulls the chair for Leon like he did last time, at last aware of the fact that Leon took these actions in particular as a sign that Sasha had an interest in him. And maybe he did. Maybe he instigated all these little things because he'd felt that pull then, too, meaning to provoke their current circumstances without realizing it.

Now, however, these things are deliberate and he goes as far as gently shifting his hand along Leon's shoulders before seating himself opposite of him. "Hmm... I think I know just the thing ..." A smile pulls at his lips as he opens the menu. He lets his gaze linger on the page infront of him for a brief moment before he makes a decision and reads the name of the dish out loud. He explains what he has chosen and then gives Leon a look. "It's quite good," he says, "...and it usually doesn't take long for the kitchen to whip it up either." Which, given that they both seem eager to get back to the hotel, appears to be the most important criteria at the moment.

But in truth Sasha is in no real rush to leave once they've properly settled at their table. His long legs stretched out just enough that he can shift his foot between Leon's and hook their ankles together. It sends a small thrill down his spine when Leon shifts to bring them closer together as well. It makes him feel even more like a teenager with his first crush, but even when he catches the spark of amusement in Leon's eyes it doesn't deter him in the slightest.

"But there is a selection of desserts, too. If you think we can spare the time after, that is."

[aureatescars]

Sasha doesn't even notice he's making a face until Leon calls him out on it. Then, he sighs and makes an effort to smooth out the wrinkle between his brows. "It's been an eventful day," he says, trying and failing not to sound too defensive. "I forgot to take the last one when I was supposed to." Which at this point was several hours ago. He shifts in his seat, sinking a little lower. He's not looking at Leon, but rather keeping his eyes on the road.

He's been bad about taking the pain medication when needed during his time at the hospital, more often than not preferring pain over the overall more stark numbness that came with the moment the painkillers take effect, and they've argued about this back at the hospital more than once. Admittedly, they've argued about quite a lot of things during their time together. Leon does have a way of getting under his skin, Sasha was made aware of that from the moment they met.

However, Sasha is not trying to pick a fight here and neither is Leon, that much Sasha can discern from the genuine concern that underlies his offer. So, Sasha forgoes any deflection that sits on the tip of his tongue and then nods. The thought of going maybe another few hours without something to at least alleviate the discomfort not something he wants to entertain after everything he's been through today; that they have been through. Leon shouldn't have to deal with him being irritated by something easily avoidable.

An odd sense of warmth overcomes him at the thought that Leon cares enough to ask where previously it's only ever been a source of annoyance for Sasha. It's closely followed by the awareness that Leon knows him well enough to notice things like this now, however, Sasha isn't entirely sure what to make of that just yet. But with Leon constantly reminding him that it's alright to rely on him — that it's mandatory even for all of this to work in the first place — Sasha's finally inclined to believe him.

So, he folds and casts his senseless pride aside. "But yeah... that's probably a good idea."

It's then that he turns to look at Leon, studying his profile for a moment. He still isn't entirely certain how he feels about everything that has happened today, or how he'll ever repay Leon for all he has done and the fact that he is willing to put up with everything Sasha's thrown at him, consciously or not.

Sasha ultimately looks back out the window, thinking back to the first time they met. He inspects the way Leon's entire demeanor made his blood boil back then and how everything he found aggravating has become something of an endearing quality instead. His snark, his attitude and smile, his way of pushing Sasha where he really doesn't want to go. He turns it all over in his head, inspects it from every angle. He doesn't yet dare to hold all he is feeling about it up to the light. But there is no denying Leon's changed him in the short time they've known eachother and Sasha can't help but compare him to the only other person that ever truly challenged him in this way...

He ends up smiling at the memory of her and that is maybe the biggest surprise of all. For the first time in forever his heart doesn't ache with that same loneliness he felt each time a stray thought led him back to the memory of her.

She would have liked you. He thinks quietly to himself.

The smile on his face doesn't fade until they reach their destination. When Leon goes to fetch his wheelchair Sasha's gaze is drawn to the horizon where dark clouds are gathering. It's still too warm for snow to start falling anytime soon, even higher up as they are in this region, which likely means that they're in for some heavy rain later in the evening. He'd rather be back at the cabin by the time it starts.

Leon brings him the chair and a bottle of water alongside the promised painkillers. Sasha takes them and with that they're off to the store. Sasha glances up at Leon when he sees him shiver from the corner of his eye. "We should get you some warmer clothes," he says as he takes in the way Leon is ducking into his sweater as the wind picks up around them, pulling the too long sleeves over his hands. It almost strikes him as cute how he is drowning in Sasha's sweater. "We're not due for it just yet, but winter hits hard and sudden around here."

"As long as you make up your mind about it before we leave the grocery store." Sasha answers at Leon's request to give him some time to think on what he wants Sasha to make for him. Sasha is also already going through a list of possible dishes for the next few days in his mind, making a mental note to stock up on quite a few things in bulk so that they don't have to make too many trips back into town just because he suddenly decided he wants to spend his time at the cabin rekindling his long abandoned interest in cooking.

Despite his overall lighter mood and the fact that Leon, too, seems to start enjoying their little shopping trip more and more now that the things with Mikael have been smoothed out, Sasha can't help the fact that he is already feeling the strain of exertion from wheeling himself around the store, going back and forth for one thing or another. He is trying to keep it under wraps most of the time, but his fingers clench a little tighter around the handles of his wheels and he tries to shift where he is seated in the wheelchair to alleviate some pressure and ease some of the pain in his back.

He should have brought his painkillers with him, but he didn't think to grab them earlier. So, he is left with a bit of a pinched expression by the time they make their way outside again. Admittedly, it eases when Leon makes a ligthearted comment about how quickly things spread through the grapevine around these parts. "Well, you just casually made a deal to buy a house in the middle of the only hardware store in town just so you can get your way of renovating it." Sasha says, still baffled by the prospect and therefore unable to keep the fondness from his tone entirely. "The shopkeeper probably figures it's best to stay on your good side, given that you're ready to spend a lot of money on a whim."

Sasha looks up at Leon once they're done loading the car with all of their things and the only thing lef to do is getting Sasha out of the wheelchair and into the passenger's seat. For a rather embarrassingly long moment he can't help but take in the expression on Leon's face, the smile playing around his lips and the relaxed posture now make him look far less troubled than he did after their mishap at the lake earlier. Sasha decides he likes this far more than the dark and faraway look that seemed to dull the color of Leon's eyes. The shadows beneath them are still there and from what he's gathered of Leon's past so far he's almost certain they'll never fade entirely, but the hard lines of his face have softened considerably. And frankly, this thought fills him with a confusing amount of relief.

But once it becomes apparent to both of them that Sasha is quite blatantly staring at Leon Sasha shakes his head and makes to pull himself up and out of the wheelchair to stand. His face briefly scrunches up as a flicker of pain turns to a rather sudden throb of it, but when Leon steps in to steady him Sasha finds himself breathe easier the moment Leon's hand alights on his arm.

"Thank you." Sasha says with a brush of his own hand against Leon's, and hopes that it conveys at least a fraction of what everything that just happened in the store means to him. He knows Leon will want to brush his gratitude off, but it wouldn't feel right if he didn't at least say something.

He leaves it at that however and finally they get him back into the car. It's a blessing that despite the persistent pain he is able to at least keep himself standing on his own, which makes the process that much easier.

"It's down this road and to the right." Sasha says just in case Leon hasn't quite memorized the overall layout of the town just yet.

[aureatescars]

He's altogether too busy staring as Leon gets off the bike with fluid movements to grace Leon's comment with an answer, although he wholeheartedly agrees with the notion. Nigh hypnotized is he by the shift of the well-toned muscle he knows for a fact are hidden beneath layers of leather and fabric.

Sasha runs a hand over his face and through his hair, opening his jacket to give himself some more room to breathe. He doesn't mean to let this ravenous hunger for Leon overtake him at every turn. It's still worrying how strong it isq, but maybe not all that surprising after years of doubting that he'd be able to have anything even remotely close to what they've shared up until this point. Maybe it's all repressed frustration, emotional and sexual, that makes his desires breach the surface so violently now that he has an outlet for it.

But that doesn't explain the connection that he feels between them, or the fact that he has felt altogether more strong and settled in his skin since Leon stepped back into his life. So, maybe it is just Leon that inspires such a shift in him. After all, when was the last time Sasha actually had a day where he could let loose, and not become exhausted halfway through? Maybe it's all it took for someone to push him to his limits to rediscover long hidden reserves.

He returns to his bike to retrieve his cane, out of habit more than anything else. He hardly feels like he needs it to walk right now, but that is mostikely the lingering adrenaline from the ride making him feel elated and dulling any and all sensations of pain. Sasha is almost certain all of this will come and bite him in the ass later on, but right now he couldn't care less as he follows Leon into the restaurant, appreciating his choice of a table for the exact same reasons as his lover. Old instincts are not easily shed, even in mundane circumstances and besides, as men with their respective occupations foresight is always better than a bullet between the eyes.

He pulls the chair for Leon like he did last time, at last aware of the fact that Leon took these actions in particular as a sign that Sasha had an interest in him. And maybe he did. Maybe he instigated all these little things because he'd felt that pull then, too, meaning to provoke their current circumstances without realizing it.

Now, however, these things are deliberate and he goes as far as gently shifting his hand along Leon's shoulders before seating himself opposite of him. "Hmm... I think I know just the thing ..." A smile pulls at his lips as he opens the menu. He lets his gaze linger on the page infront of him for a brief moment before he makes a decision and reads the name of the dish out loud. He explains what he has chosen and then gives Leon a look. "It's quite good," he says, "...and it usually doesn't take long for the kitchen to whip it up either." Which, given that they both seem eager to get back to the hotel, appears to be the most important criteria at the moment.

But in truth Sasha is in no real rush to leave once they've properly settled at their table. His long legs stretched out just enough that he can shift his foot between Leon's and hook their ankles together. It sends a small thrill down his spine when Leon shifts to bring them closer together as well. It makes him feel even more like a teenager with his first crush, but even when he catches the spark of amusement in Leon's eyes it doesn't deter him in the slightest.

"But there is a selection of desserts, too. If you think we can spare the time after, that is."

How Sasha feels impossibly closer to Leon riding on seperate bikes at breakneck speed through the city than he would pressed close to his back is beyond him. But every turn and every maneuver to overtake the other has him convinced they're even breathing in synch. It's exhilarating, exciting and all together so different from anything Sasha dared to even consider trying before reuniting with Leon. It's almost as if he's stronger now with him here than he was in those years apart. And reasonably none of this should be able to make him feel this much better in such a short period of time.

But with his heartbeat and the rush of blood in his ears only drowned out by the sound of Leon's voice coming over the intercom Sasha couldn't care less about probability or how strong he should and should not be feeling.

He's buzzing with energy by the tome they come to a stop near their destination, the purr of the hikes' engined fading into silence as they both turn them off. Sasha sees Leon take a breather, settling back in the seat for a moment before he takes off his helmet, but Sasha is already off the bike by the time Leon turns to him. His smile a brilliant line of teeth and its brightness matching the blue of his eyes. Sasha wants to kiss him. Needs to.

And thus he pulls the helmet off while already moving towards him, now holding the piece of gear in one gloved hand while the other already tilts Leon's head back for better access, fitting their lips together in one smooth movement, instinctively angling his head to make them fit perfectly. Leon shudders under his touch when Sasha's hand moves to his nape, the leather of his gloves whispering through the short strands of hair. It's almost as if he can feel the touch echo between them, the want, the blind trust, it's all right there.

It's a good thing they chose a spot to park their bikes a little ways away from other people. Tucked away between two bigger cars in the parking lot it affords them moment of relative privacy in which Sasha can finally try and calm down again. He presses their foreheads together when they finally part, drunk on adrenaline and this feeling of belonging he's not sure he has ever felt before. It's not as much pure want as it is joy and gratitude and affection all rolled into one and disbelief over finding it so unexpectedly in Leon.

He pulls away at last, a smile tugging at his own lips. "I didn't." He admits, but there is no melancholy to his tone. "But you've proven me wrong yet again." His face is flushed, his eyes shine with amusement. He's feeling a little too warm from the ride and the kiss, and reaches up to unzip his jacket, shaking his head in disbelief when Leon's eyes track the movement and catch on the smallest sliver of exposed skin around his collar bone. It's not like Sasha is immune to the sight Leon makes either, still leaned back on the bike, his hair just a little bit tousled from the helmet and his face and eyes betraying the same want Sasha feels coiling within himself, it makes Sasha want to reach out and see just hiw far they'd take it this time.

He runs his free hand through his hair and down his face, but it does little to shake the thought. He breathes in and out slowly attempting to steady himself. It really is all too easy to get lost in all of this. He needs to rein himself back in.

"Ready to head inside?" He asks, the slight rasp of his voice and the appreciative once over he gives his lover prove enough that Sasha isn't as composed after all of this as he's trying to appear.