#steve is recovering from season 2

[sabbathbloodysabbeth]

Desire

Ao3 Link

Tw; Mentions of drug use/addiction, implied child abuse, strong themes of mental issues, mention of vomit (but not in detail)

Words; 6k

Summary; Eddie Munson finds himself under the influence and alone in Steve Harrington's bathroom. Not alone for the first time, but being in Steve Harrington's bathroom was definitely a first. Dabbling in his stash he comes to the realization that he doesn't want to become his father or go down the same path as him. Only eighteen, he's scared of disappointment and failing his uncle who has saved him from himself time after time again. Feeling like he is the only one who seems to not be mentally okay, Steve Harrington decides to stumble into his bathroom proving that there are others out there like him falling apart at the seams and barely keeping it together. He finds himself not only being comforted in his struggles he also finds himself comforting Steve who seems to be dealing with something far worse than Daddy issues.

Eddie doesn't mean to. One second he's in the thick of it, the center of the party as he hands out little baggies of drugs out to anyone who would sneak a crumpled up twenty in his hand. The next he finds himself in the bathroom, the wallpaper so ugly it hurts his eyes to the point he believes that's the reason he's throwing up. Not because of the drugs that were slowly pumping through his veins, causing his head to begin spinning in a bad way as the rush hits him.

He was unsure when he decided it would be a good idea to dabble in his own stash. Before, it had always been his number one rule not to finding any other drug dealer who did foolish. Now he was a hypocrite that craved for more then the drug. The hidden desire to be like the teenagers that had been swarming around him outside of this small bathroom. He wanted to be carefree not having to worry about bills, helping his uncle keep food on the table, or for one of these drug deals to suddenly go wrong and all that his uncle had been working for, for the past decade gone down the drain.

Eddie was still young, eighteen and finally in his senior year. Almost out of this hellhole known as Hawkins. He still had a chance to turn his life around, stop selling drugs or "experimenting" and get a more stable footing. He knows that Wayne would gladly get him a spot to work at in the factory but Eddie didn't want that life. He wanted something bigger. Something out of this world. He wanted to be like Ozzy, Dio, Tommy Lee, and Gene Simmons. Not like his father. Who could barely scrape enough money to keep a roof over their heads, and apart of Eddie understands that Al Munson needed to break the law to survive. Sell stolen cars for food. What Al Munson didn't have to do though was beat the shit out of Eddie whenever anything went wrong.

Drugs.

Drugs were the most stable thing in Eddie's life. Sure, Wayne was consistent but drugs have always been there since Eddie could remember. On the counters, in his pockets as he helped his father smuggle bags across neighborhoods, and even in his own system when things didn't feel right. Feel a bit down, people tell you to smoke weed. Solve all your issues. For a while it did. It helped Eddie float by on his own little cloud up until it didn't.

The longer Eddie listened to those people the more he realized that drugs were becoming the issue. Consuming him in ways that he's only heard from those who came to talk at school. This, this was going to be the last time. Eddie was determined on that. Though he had said that the last couple of times he's been like this. He needed help and he didn't know where to go. There was of course always Wayne, but he didn't want the man to look at him like he did his father. With pity, shame, and a lot of disappointment because Eddie should know better. Especially after what happened to his father.

He should but yet here he was, groaning he lifts his head up from the bowl. His eyes stay closed as he gags a bit more when the smell of toilet water hits his nostrils again. Throwing himself back from the stench, his head hits the wall. A soft thump, loud enough to gather attention if anyone was paying attention. That was unlikely as everyone was pretty drunk right now. Letting his head slack to the side a bit he lets his vision swim around him like a horoscope. He wondered if this was how flies saw the world. If so, he doesn't understand how they weren't constantly throwing up. Then again they did eat literal shit, so tunnel vision was most likely the least of their worries.

Squirming a bit, he fidgets with himself as he tilts his head back to look up at the light. His hair falls past his shoulders as he blinks lucidly, not processing the brightness of the bulb hurting his eyes as he giggles gently feeling the high set in. The warm feeling wraps itself around him like angel wings, protecting him from the darkness that lives inside of him. Numbing him enough for him to forget that he was currently at a party. In the bathroom of Steve Harringtons' house as he blacks in and out of reality. Fighting for control for a few minutes before giving in with a soft sigh. His body going lax as he gives up.

Time was always wonky when he was like this. Five minutes felt like an hour, a minute felt like twelve, and so on and on. So, he could not tell you how long he was in there for. Barely reacting when the door opens, not a surprise as he was too busy trying to hold his vomit in to remember on locking the door behind him. His reactions slow as he blinks startled as he sees an exhausted Steve Harrington walking in. Looking just as alarmed as Eddie felt.

Looking confused Steve hesitates. Not saying anything for a second as he stares at the other dumbly, like a deer in headlights. Before he flees into action, "Parties over, need to get out Munson." he says dully. The bags under his eyes were noticeable to Eddie who frowns as he tries to process what was going on. Moving he fights to stand up, unable to do so as he makes a soft whining noise. Eyes filling with irritation and embarrassment. The first crack in the dam of the great Munson flood. Everything starts to seep out uncontrollably as he tries to hold it in, save it for later. But it's too late as his body gives in to his needs and he's sobbing uncontrollably.

The high was not worth it anymore. It used to make him feel good far longer than this, and now he felt like shit. His hands shaking as he couldn't control his body. His brain streams a spew of anxious thoughts through his head. Wayne was going to kick him out if he found out. Eddies crying, and he doesn't even know the reason why. There had been so many instances when he kept his emotions bottled that he was not sure which one finally made him snap. Made him go crazy enough to cry like a little bitch in front of Steve Harrington.

He doesn't know what's happening and that's making everything seem far scarier than what it really was. He felt the other boy, who was only a year younger than him staring at him intently. Eddie felt like he was really living up to his nickname, a freak. A freak who was currently putting a complete stranger through a very uncomfortable encounter. Eddie was supposed to be an adult, yet here he was breaking down in front of someone that was legally still a child. For some reason that thought only makes him cry more. Eddie was barely a full year older than the other and he has yet to view himself as a child. The reality that his childhood was taken away from him because of drugs setting in as tears started to run down his cheeks. His eyelashes stick to his skin as he struggles to open his eyes from feeling so out of it and from crying so hard.

Time was fucking with him again, In the back of his head he knew that the whole encounter that was happening between him and the other boy was only a few seconds long. But the drugs were telling him it was much longer than that. He's pretty sure he was going through a mid-life crisis or something. He loses himself in his thoughts more as he realizes he's no better than his father. Selling drugs to those who have perfect lives is something that should be cherished but is only going to be destroyed by Eddie's doing. He's having a come to Jesus moment, as with in the next few seconds he makes the decision to no longer sell drugs to high schoolers. It's all going by so fast in his brain that he's not sure he's going to remember his promise in the morning.

Clap!

He blinks confused as two hands slap together in front of his face, a soft buzz clogging his ears from hearing anything but the muffled slap of skin. His eyes begin to regain focus as they stare back at Steve who is still staring at him carefully. As if he was on the verge of calling nine one one at any moment. Oh, God. Why did Eddie have the worst luck that always led him into situations like these. Covered in snot, tears, and possibly puke in front of the most popular boy of Hawkins?

"Hey... hey Munson." The boy's voice seeps through the fog. It barely does but it makes itself through, penetrating Eddie's brain enough for him to finally react to the other. Who looks like he's been trying to gather his attention for a minute now. Steve's eyebrows are furrowed up in concern as his hands stay at a safe distance from the other, but stays in Eddie's personal bubble just in case. In case of what Eddie wasn't sure.

Eddie blinks at the other, barely there as he frowns a bit as he feels his body moving up, almost on its own with Steve's help. Being led to the bathtub as Steve easily moves his legs in one by one. Moving and forcing him to sit down as Steve handles him with such care that he doesn't know what to do with himself.

"What-" He slurs a little bit, blinking as he tries to talk but it felt like peanut butter was in his mouth, preventing him from doing such a task. "What are you doing?" His words come together, creating one but the other seems to understand what he was trying to ask as Steve smiles sadly at him, revealing a crack in his well pieced together image. Revealing his true nature to Eddie who was broken and drowning in his own mess in this tub.

Eddies high. Eddie is plastered, not in reality but he can tell when someone is like him. Broken. Barely holding on with a fake smile that was far different then someone who had it together. Relief hits him as he realizes he's not the only one out there. Then guilt as he felt greedy for feeling relief at the sign of the other man's pain.

"Helping you man, don't want you to die in my bathroom," Steve says bluntly in an attempt to put that image back up that he didn't care about Eddie, but it was to late it had started to shatter a little. A glimpse of something dark seeping through that Eddie caught and wanted to see more of. And he didn't want to see the pieces that Steve has horribly glued together, not the image that has been up for years now. Seemingly destroyed out of nowhere.

Whatever it was that came through those cracks was dark, dark enough to trigger a morbid curiosity in Eddie. What could have possibly happened to Steve Harrington that made him mentally age up so fast? So fast that it gave Eddie whiplash as he could of sworn that just last month the other was looking down at people like him. Shoving teenagers against lockers and calling them queer for just being true to their authentic selfs. Now he was helping out one of those "queers" and it seemed to be a total one eighty personality wise. It just didn't make any sense. Someone didn't just change out of nowhere without something happening and Eddie wanted to know what that something was.

Eddie furrows his eyebrows a bit, confused as he wonders if he was misreading what the other was doing. The other genuinely seemed more worried about him then his bathroom, even if he was trying to make it not seem that way. Was Steve Harrington actually a decent human being? Something that Eddie had deemed unbelievable as his mouth opens trying to say something. Before he can say anything Steve is starting to move into action. Deciding it better to ignore Eddie from now on as his hands move to tug at the vest and leather coat that was wrapped around his body. Not giving the other enough time to protest.

Eddie makes some incomprehensible noise from the back of his throat as he hesitantly starts to let the other slide his clothes off his body. Leaving him in his shorts and his pants as Steve crouches down to his knees. Face scrunched up on a mission as he helps the other to the best of his ability. Only contradicting his goal of making Eddie think he didn't care.

"What are you doing?" Eddie asks, feeling dumb. He felt so out of control, he hated every second of it but another apart of him was enjoying every gentle touch the other gave him. Treating him as something that needed to be protected, not something that needed to be tough-end up like his father had. His body goes limp without his permission under the others hands, secretly blaming it on the drugs as he tilts his head back a little. A dopey smile on his face as he decides to just ride the high of being touched, something that didn't come often. "If you wanted to get me to strip so bad Harrington, just had to ask." He giggles gently under his breath trying to lighten the mood a bit. Blinking a few times as well, eyelids closing a few seconds to long causing him to miss the soft laugh coming from the other boys throat. Who thankfully found him amusing instead of annoying or worst disgusting.

"Well, I didn't think you would want to sleep in your own vomit and my concious would not feel right letting you go to bed like this." Steve admits as he leans over the tub like hes done this countless times. Possibly he has, with Tommy Hagan being his best friend Eddie wouldn't be to surprised. The way Steve handles himself and the vomit covered clothes only proves Eddie's hypothesis that he has done this before. The other barely even reacts to the smell or anything as he throws Eddie's Black Sabbath shirt off to the side. Leaving the metalhead shirtless and slouching forward a bit, looking at Steve with shocked adoration the longer he sits there.

Steves hands don't go any lower then his stomach, head tilting up and to the side to look at Eddie with a soft smile. Still a bit forced but more tired then anything as he asks. "Mind pulling your pants off for me? Don't want to make you feel uncomfortable."

Steves face is now a soft pink as he begins to lean against the side of the tub. Sleep obviously working its way into his body, the sight making Eddie feel bad about keeping him up later then what he had to.

Eddie doesn't argue and forces himself to focus on the task at hand, and lifts his hips up awkwardly and begins to shimmy his pants down. Groaning as he does, revealing his checkered boxers as he tries not to get any vomit on his skin. Holding the bunched up pants together once he's done and looks over at Steve for directions. Letting the other carefully take them from him, setting it on top of his shirt as he moves and stands up again. Moving to the shower and quickly turning it on cold, all of it spraying and soaking Eddie up immediately.

"Son of a Bitch!" Eddie's voice cracks as he yelps out. Hands flying up to shield his face a bit as he feels his curls stick to his skin, along with his boxers. One hand quickly moving down to shield his crotch just in case the cloth was see through. He shakes his head a bit, water going all over as he whines loudly. Struggling to get away from the freezing water. "Harrington! I thought we had something going on here!" He yelps out as he slides around the tub like a fish out of water. Faintly hearing Steve scolding him for getting water all over the place while also laughing a little.

When the water is finally shut off Eddie feels like he has more control over himself. Still not completely as he squirms around shivering, arms crossing over his chest as he tries to curl up in himself to regain some body heat. Melting when he feels Steves much warmer hand land on his shoulder, gathering his attention as he looks up with loose tears slipping from his eyes. Making his eyes seem bigger then what they were as he looks up seeing Steve standing above him holding a glass of water that seemed to be pulled out of thin air.

No words are said as Eddies hands shakily reach out and takes the glass from him. He carefully drinks half the glass before his wet hands slip and dumps the rest all over his chest. The more sober he becomes, the more embarrassed he feels as more tears form in his eyes. Close to crying again, only refraining when he feels Steves looming presence over his shoulders. One hand carefully holding his back as the other moves down and takes the glass from him before he can hurt himself anymore. Then proceeding to set the glass down on the edge of the tub, eyes never moving from Eddie.

"I'm going to go get you some warmer clothes to wear okay?" Steve says gently, moving and pulling a fuzzy blue towel off from a rack and moves to gently wrap it around Eddie like a blanket. Eddie nods dumbly as he relaxes back into the tub. Feeling the lasting effects of whatever he has in his system dwindling and exhaustion start to take over. Causing him to melt impossibly more into the tub. Waiting as minutes slowly start to feel like minutes again as he hears shuffling coming from the other room.

His head stays tilted to the side as he smiles gently when Steve stumbles in with a pile of clothes in his arms. Who was unable to choose something for Eddie. Sweaters, shirts, boxers and sweatpants in his arms as he quickly drops to his knees with a soft thud. Looking over at Eddie with wide hazel eyes that were full of anxiety. Like he was afraid of doing something wrong.

Eddie sniffles a little as he smiles brightly, "Give me the Harrington special." He says without much thought. "Whats the most comfortable thing to wear in that jock mess of yours?" He teases as he moves struggling to sit up. Wanting to catch what the other has chosen to bring him he notices a blue striped polo along with pair of normal grey sweatpants hidden in the mess of dark colors. He could see other comfy looking sweaters and pants but the polo and grey sweats stuck out to him the most.

Steve sets the other clothes off to the side, far as possible from the vomit covered ones as he gets the new ones situated on the toilet cover. As he moves them Eddie can see a brand new pair of boxers that still had the size sticker on them.

Steve then continues and moves forward to offer Eddie a hand, who takes it happily and pulls himself up a bit wobbly. Eddie felt frozen as small little cold chills race through him, forcing his body to shake even more.

There's a brief pause as they both hold each others hand, Steve wanting to make sure Eddie doesn't fall on his face. Who then pulls his hand from Steves to move it under his armpit. Crossing his arms as he begins to feel a bit self conscious about everything. About this situation that he's forced Steve to be in to the fact that he was currently shirtless in one of the most jacked athletes in Hawkins.

His eyes begins to go hazy, drifting away from reality for a moment. Regaining focus after a moment, coming back to to see that he was staring a hole into the others floor. After a moment of breathing, questions start to fill his brain again. Trying to understand what the others goal was here.

"Why... why are you helping me?" He asks again. Still bewildered as he lets his eyes move to look back up at the other with confusion. This time Steve's eyes aren't meeting his and Eddie feels like there was more going on here. Never moving his eyes away from the others short movements, not missing the way the other seemed to be forcing himself to do everything. Like he didn't even want to be moving at all. Joints seemingly stiff as his limbs move, and if Eddie would have to guess they were probably like that from exhaustion. The bags under the others eyes a strong give away to Eddie's deductive reasoning.

"Like I said, I don't want you to die in my bathroom." Steve answers a bit shakily. Now holding onto another towel as he puts on a fake smile for Eddie, who frowns more. Not believing the other, well he did. He didn't think the other actually wanted him to die but there was some other hidden reason in there as well. One that Steve seemed desperate to not share.

Now realizing that the towel he recieved before was now crumpled up at the bottom of the tub Eddie takes the towel from the other. Beginning to dry his hair first before slowly rubbing at his skin, careful to not agitate his skin like the towels at home did.

"Don't do that." Eddie bitterly snips at the other as he casually bends over a bit to dry his legs. He doesn't mean to, but he was currently at his lowest and he doesn't want Steve to pretend to be any better then Eddie mentally. Strangely that hurt more then when  the other acted better then him just because he was a jock and had more money. It was obvious to him that the other was not okay.

"What?" Steve asks confused, eyebrows knitting together to express a simple emotion that seemed to have so much effort on his part. Mouth falling open a bit as he squints at the other as if he was struggling to see and for all Eddie knew he was. Something he quickly takes note of, for what he was unsure.

"Pretend... pretending to be doing better then me. You look like you are also on your last thread and I think its bullshit. Bullshit, that youre trying to act like this whole situation is normal when it isn't. Its painfully obvious that I'm not okay and just looking at you it seems like you aren't either so stop. Stop pretending man," Eddies eyes are filling with tears again as his words slur together. Hands moving out a bit and aimlessly pointing at the other. Never poking him in the chest as he sways on his feet a little. Shaky breathes falling from his mouth as he finds that the longer he stands there the harder it was to keep his eyes open.

Steve's reaction is unreadable as he silently hands Eddie the blue polo once he seems to be done drying himself. Eddie takes the shirt and pulls it over his head. Looking down at his wet briefs and back up at Steve who was now looking away not saying a word, holding a dry pair of boxers in his left hand. Dangling between his fingers waiting for Eddie to take them.

His silence could easily be mistaken as him being pissed at Eddie, thats what Eddie thinks at first before he realizes this was who the other was when he wasn't pretending. Shoulders sagged, head hanging to look down at the floor as he no longer puts any effort in his movement. Like he was now floating, in a similar way Eddie was. No longer fighting to stay grounded where he was as Eddie gets changed. No more words are exchanged as Eddie steps out of the tub to slip the sweat pants chosen on. Nearly stumbling and falling on his face from the lack of control over his limbs.

Smiling a bit tense as Steve is quick to catch him. Well Eddie wouldn't describe it as catching, the other wasn't putting much effort into holding him. Just allowing him to lean against him as both stay impossibly close. The contact making both of them stiffen up and back up away from each other a little. Both of them stumbling over their own feet as their eyes lift up and hesitantly meet. A conversation beginning with no words. Both of them to exhausted to speak. A different exhaustion then being physically tired.

Steve moves his head a bit, slides his feet out of the bathroom once he opens the door. Eddie follows along, no longer looking at the other for guidance. Instead he floats along with the other as they both silently walk down the dark halls of the now very silent house. Eddie was unable to see Steve that well anymore so he wasn't able to see him react to the silence or the mess that seemed to explode all over the house. Not just downstairs.

He tags along as Steve enters a room, looking over at his shoulder at Eddie who moves in with him. Confusion written all over his face as he realizes that this ugly room was Steve's. Turning his head he looks over at Steve with questions behind his eyes. Questions that couldn't be answered nonverbally as Steve begins to stutter out words. The effort of talking seemed to make him more uncomfortable then the idea of having a complete stranger share a room with him.

"I- I thought it would be better if you sleep in here with me. I don't want you falling down the stairs because I put you in the guest room that's next to the stairs and you try going to the bathroom and whoops, you've broken your neck." Steve's starting to ramble anxiously now. "and the two other guest rooms are a mess. I haven't gotten a chance to clean them so theres stuff on the floors in there and I don't want you tripping when you are like this. Plus I don't want to leave you alone when you are not sober just in case you accidentally overdose or something."

The words are pooling out and swimming around Eddies head. None of the very obvious excuses sticking as Eddie simply nods deciding not to question the other anymore or else he was going to get a headache. Lets the other live behind another image as he moves and flops himself down on the bed. Letting the silence fall over them again as he accepts his fate of sharing a bed with Steve Harrington, who seems eager to have someone else with him.

Eddie turns his head a bit and watches the other curiously, the other starting his bed time routine when he realizes that Eddie was no longer going to question him. Steves shoulders have grown tense as he pins his curtains up against the wall allowing the moonlight to fall in and brighten the room up. Casting more shadows along the room that the other seemed to hate a lot as he turns a light on to see better. Moving and taking what seems to be a starwars night light and plugging it in. If it hadn't seem to be to much effort, Eddie might have laughed. But as he looks at the other more, really looks at him he decides that if he could laugh he wouldn't.

There was something very wrong with the boy and Eddie couldn't place what. His first guess was that the other was afraid of the dark. Watching intently as Steve moves around the room, avoiding any dark area that the light didn't meet. Now closer to his closet as his hands move and shut the doors, right before he is running a hand through his hair. A nervous fidget possibly. Now if Eddie wasn't high, and thinking logically he probably wouldn't want to share a room with the other. Actually he would be home right now.

Though apart of him was happy he was here as he notices that Steve seems to have grown frozen. Body stiff as he stares down at the floor, eyes glazed over again. He doesn't look like he's here in reality anymore and he was the sober one. Which now that Eddie thinks about it, is a smidge weird considering the fact the other had been the host of the party.

Eddie doesn't say anything, let's the other be until his concern starts to grow. The other could possibly be having a seizure, he has seen someone have one similar to this. Just staring off with out realizing it. Eddie wouldn't be shocked if the other had them, after being hit in the head so many times between sports, Jonathan Byers and Billy Hargroves fists.

Eddie forces his body up off the bed, hearing the loud creak of the bed that seems to trigger Steve back into the real world leading to a very understandable anxiety attack. Steve's body shakes, hands squeezed into pale fists and chest heaving forward and back as he struggles to breathe. Head tilted and looking over at Eddie like he wasn't real. Stepping back as his back hits the wall. He doesn't seem like hes fully there as Eddie moves closer.

Steves hands fly up in the air as he starts to plead something. Eddies gut drops as this wasn't normal for a seventeen year old to be doing. There was something terribly wrong and Eddie doesn't know if he can help.

"Steve, Steve!" He yells trying to get him to come back to him. The others tears were overwhelming Eddie and it was making Eddie uncomfortable. Watching someone who has been perfect his entire highschool career seemingly snapping. "Its me, Its Munson. We are in your room about to go to bed man." Eddie is trying his hardest not to yell again. Not enjoying the way the other flinches back. Reminding him of himself when he first moved in with Wayne.

Something was off and Eddie wasn't sure if he wanted to know what if it made the other look like that.

So afraid and lost.

Eddie doesn't move much closer to the other, staying in the spot he stood to afraid to trigger the other more. Steves body is spasming awkwardly as his eyes stay glossed over, the bags underr them growing bigger right under Eddies concerned watch. The other was shaking, breathing coming in gasps before Eddie says fuck it and stumbles forward. Regretting his decision of getting high. But if he hadn't he wouldn't be here right now. Moving and pulling the other into a hug.

They were both two complete strangers, gripping onto each other once they realized that this was something they both needed. Steves still shaking as he hides his face in Eddies shoulder. Eddie is melting and not trying to put armor up to toughen up for the other. Instead he melts, and gives in as they become a puddle of tears. Both not okay as they stay like that for who knows how long.

Steve pulling back as his eyes grow wide, he seems to be there more then what he had been. "I am so sorry." He stutters out.

Eddie smiles tightly at the other, trying to act cool. Trying to be the rock of whatever fucked up situation they were in. But after a moment of trying he decides to follow his advice from earlier and not pretend as his smile quickly drops. "No don't me." He says gently. On his knees now as his eyes look at the other with curiosity.

He was watching in real time as the other starts to rebuild his walls. Starts to pull back from Eddie, literally and figuratively as he stands. Looking anywhere but Eddie as he sniffles, rubbing his eyes a bit. Eddie's mouth opens to ask the other questions, a light noise leaving his throat before he snaps his mouth back shut when his eyes meet the others cold, dull eyes. If this wasn't a messed up situation Eddie possibly would have made a joke about being on his knees in front of Steve. But instead he forces himself up, letting the other drag him along whatever cloud that he has been living on all by himself. Blinking and one second he's standing at the closet, the next he is laying back in the others bed.

Ignoring the way the others body shake and it wasn't from being cold. The room was hotter then Texas's balls, Eddie could barely have the others sheets wrapped around him because of it. The lights now all off, with the exception of the night light. But by the others actions Eddie wouldn't be to surprised if the other didn't leave his lamp light on also most nights. From the way he was taking shaky breathes to the way he squirmed around uncomfortably Steve Harrington was afraid. Of what, was the unknown part to Eddie. A mystery.

Eddie was high trailer trash who couldn't even help his father when he needed him most, or himself as he drowns in emotions. How was he supposed to help Steve Harrington? He's lost in his thoughts for what seems like forever. He could slowly feel the effects of what he took dwindling, eyes growing heavy. He knew the other was still awake, his body was still shaking and he tapping his fingers against the sheets like the rhythm calmed him.

Eddie would blame it on the drugs in the morning when they wake up tangled together. But for now he doesn't care as he carefully shifts over to the left side of the bed. Feeling pity for the other and wanting to stop the bed from shaking so much. He gently wraps his arms around the other, moving before any reasonable thought could stop him and hides his face in the back of the others neck.

Steve doesn't say anything. He's seemed to be nonverbal again, but his body does stop shaking after a minute. Barely two as soft snores start to fall from the back of his throat. And apart of Eddie is relieved that he could help the other the way he helped him in the bathroom. Taking the moment to ground himself once more as he takes in the smell of cedar and smoke. Probably the others cologne.

Eddie feels like he's walking on thin ice as he moves his legs forward a bit. Letting himself relax knowing the other wasn't going to push him away. Wrapping his leg around his hip as he melts into the other more. Even though it was to hot for cuddling. In the back of his head he couldn't help but wonder what scared Steve Harrington so much he couldn't go to bed without shaking? Wondered if the boys kindness from earlier was a one hit wonder?

So many questions and concerns. Along with the anxious thoughts about telling Wayne about his not so little drug problem he begins to doze off. Breathing in and out as he passes out. Having the best night's sleep that he has had in a long time.

Authors Note; I am not going to lie this one shot took a lot out of me to write and is probably one of my proudest works. I purposely try not to write a whole lot about drugs because of personal issues but this one shot seemed like something I needed to write. And even though this isn't the most angstiest one shot that I could have written it was personally draining as I have felt a lot of what Eddie has in this oneshot. Apart of me wants to write more for this au but another part of me doesn't so I'm going to leave this up to the response I get from you guys :)

[ill-beyour-captain]

OK so I was thinking about this and like kinda expanding it? maybe not? BUT

His Mom? She's always been like there for him emotionally right? Always let him know that she'll be there and could talk even if his parents aren't there physically. And Steve? the first two maybe three years he took her up on it, those were also the years when he was still on good terms with his dad.

UNTIL his like freshman/early sophomore year. Cause shit peer pressure is a BITCH. He stops reaching out as much gives like basic answers when his parents call, he stops paying as much attention in school, Dad gets stricter.

And not long after he fails that Spanish test a tabloid or magazine/ rumor whatever comes out, speculating whether his dad was cheating on his mom cause people saw him with another woman and they seemed CLOSE even though his dad has a reputation of being closed off.

So before business trips his mom will say stuff like "Gotta go with your father to make sure he's not cheating again" and his father would respond in an annoyed way.

At least thats what Steve thought. Steve sometimes has trouble picking up his parents social cues but it doesn't really help that his parents can't really adjust their sarcasm or humor tone. They just have a dry tone when being sarcastic so it makes it sound REAL.

And the Woman? She's like a distant but close? family member or friend. Maybe they're like part of the lgbtq community, fuck who knows if they're even a woman, you know explains why they were so fine with Steddie later. THE POINT IS they know and trust that person and each other so much they make jokes about it.

The thought that his father might be cheating on his mom? It holds Steve back from fully wanting to apologize to his father even though he already knows the strictness was for his betterment and they're already getting closer again. So in one of his and his moms weekly talks (cause Steves leaving the peer pressure and character development, and Robin definitely helped and sometimes joins, maybe sha has her own gossip calls with his mom). He mentions it and the talk is kind of like,

"Yeah I know, I guess he just wanted the best for me. But he cheated on you mom? I mean sometimes I wonder why you're still with him! Not trying to be rude! Sorry! I just-"

"Cheated? Steve, honey, your Dad has never cheated on me"

"Um? What? No yeah he has? Ever since that rumor started you kept telling me you were following him so he wouldn't cheat?"

"....We were joking the whole time, you didn't know? We thought you knew?"

"NO I DIDN'T KNOW"

So that all gets cleared up. The next time they're in person and they're reminiscing that whole conversation where steve and his dad tell each other they love each other.

Steve’s dad was a grade A asshole. At least, that’s what Steve thought ever since the first time he got in trouble for drinking beer with Tommy and Carol instead of studying for his Spanish test – which he ended up failing spectacularly.

His dad was strict, kept going on and on about how Steve should work harder, shouldn’t expect to get everything handed to him on a silver platter just because they had money, that the world was unfair but that he shouldn’t take advantage of that fact.

It was infuriating. They fought a lot, all through high school, but after Steve graduated, it got even worse. He vividly remembered the day he got rejected for Tech, all his chances to actually get into college out of the window. He knew that his dad knew the dean, knew that he was only one phone call away from getting in - a phone call his dad refused to make. Mr. Harrington had been stubborn as ever, with his whole spiel of hard work and honesty and refusing to partake in nepotism.

And the worst thing about all of that? The fact that his father was right. The fact that Steve had indeed prioritized being keg king and getting into Nancy Wheeler’s panties over good grades, convinced that his father’s connections would be his safety net anyway.

So yeah, Steve hated his father when the man made him get some shitty job at the mall and work for his income like Mr. Harrington himself had done before he got to where he was now. The man was an asshole, obviously.

Keep reading

[traveler-at-heart]

You're ok

Summary: As you recover from a life threatening mission, Natasha struggles to be vulnerable.

Natasha Romanoff x F!R

Edit: The last part is a scene from The Diplomat's season 2. Highly recommend the show, as it also has our lovely Ali Ahn ( AKA Alice Wu)

Death is part of the job. You had always been prepared for it.

Failure and a slow recovery were things that you were less inclined to accept.

It was hard to deal with the fact you had been ambushed, and almost killed by a bomb in what was supposed to be an easy mission.

Two weeks after being confined to the sterile hospital walls you’re back at the Compound. Bucky offered to help, carrying your things and lending his arm as support.

You certainly didn’t expect the rest of the Avengers on the foyer, excited to greet you.

“Don’t make a fuss” you say, letting them hug you. Wanda rolls her eyes, taking your bag.

“It’s a miracle you’re alive. We’re gonna make a fuss”

“Just for today, let us make a big deal out of this” Steve says.

You had seen all of your teammates when they visited at the hospital, with one notable exception.

Said exception walks through the door, the hint of a smile on her beautiful face as your eyes meet green ones.

“Welcome back” Natasha says, her tone gentle.

“Thank you”

“Romanoff might like you, she almost smiled” Tony says, but you don’t pay him attention.

“That’s just because I thought you weren’t here” Natasha walks past him, squeezing your good arm as a silent goodbye. How you wish you could follow after her, ask why she didn’t even stop by once, but she’s hurrying out the room in record time, as if she can sense your intentions.

Truthfully, you won’t act on them. Natasha doesn’t owe you anything, not even a get well card.

“Let’s get you settled in your new room” Tony becons, and you frown.

“New room? What happened to the old one?”

“This one has some improvements. You’re gonna love it”

It’s evident he still feels guilty over what happened, though it was definitely not his fault that you almost got killed.

The new room has a mini fridge, a giant tv, a king size bed, and a small couch. It also has a huge bathtub, as well as an incredible view of the forest behind the Compound.

“Do you like it?”

“It’s�� I’m perfectly fine going back to my old room”

“Can I have it if she doesn’t want it?” Sam intervenes, looking around the space.

“Come on, you’re gonna be using crutches for a while. You need a bigger space. And entertainment”

“It’s true” Steve says. “Of course we all want to be optimistic but…”

The doctors had said it would take at least six weeks to get you walking without aid. And then, you’d have to train and get back in shape. You are looking at two or three months of recovery.

It’s not that you dislike the bigger space or amenities. It’s the fact that Natasha was closer to you in the other room, and so you’d meet her most mornings as you’d step out to hit the gym or make breakfast.

Now, not only is she emotionally distant, she’s also physically away. And you don’t know which is worse.

“I’ll give it a try” you promise, though you know nothing will be better than your old room.

—

There are unexpected challenges that come with your injuries. Like cooking breakfast. Wanda is more than happy to help most days, but she’s been out for a mission the past week. You could have stuck to cereal, except Steve is always around by the time you wake up, and he insists on making your breakfast.

It’s a nice gesture, though the food is horrible.

You’ve spent the better part of your morning  playing with your eggs, considering eating cereal again, when someone places a cup of coffee and a paper bag next to you.

“I don’t know who told Steve he could cook” Natasha says with a smile.

“He means well” you answer, and wait for her to nod towards the bag to inspect its contents. Grilled cheese and a scone. Your mouth waters at the smell.

“You’re amazing, Natasha, honestly” you say between bites, moaning at the taste. “I can’t remember the last time I ate something this good. Except Wanda’s food, of course”

“Enjoy” she says, taking away the plate with eggs for you.

You were hoping to have her company while you eat, but maybe that’s too much to hope for.

—

At last, there’s something you can do. While everyone is busy with missions, you focus on reports and intelligence, which is perfect, because all you have to do is sit and read.

There are still deadlines and though no one wants to put pressure on you, you make sure nothing is delayed. As you keep reading in one of the conference rooms, the door is pushed open and you look up, alarmed at the sudden intrusion.

“Yes?” you say, pushing your glasses up, staring at Natasha. She turns around, struggling to speak.

“Y-you should be resting”

“I’m doing Bucky’s reports. You know how he is, he can’t type anything in the computer”

“It’s close to midnight. Have you even had dinner yet? I’m sure he won’t mind if you do them later”

“Nat. It’s fine, honestly” you say, smiling at her awkwardness. “I like to feel useful”

She nods, looking around the room, as if weighting her options. Moving away from the door, she walks and sits next to you, checking out some of the paperwork you’re reviewing

“Someone should have really taught James how to type” she mutters when she gets to the part where Bucky wrote target pulled out a cock instead of Glock.

You snort out a laugh, because it’s the dumbest fucking thing in the world.

“Ten bucks if you leave it like that” she insists and you shake your head.

“I considered it but then Tony wouldn’t know when to stop the teasing”

“Fair” she tilts her head, still smiling at you.

It’s obvious now that Natasha’s staying to make sure you go back to rest soon. So you enjoy the silence that comes with her presence, thinking this might be a step in the right direction.

But then, you stretch your arms above your head, forgetting about the stitches in your side until you feel a pull.

“Fuck” you bend over in pain, and Natasha is by your side in an instant. “It’s ok. I just stretched too hard. Forgot I still have a hole on my side”

Natasha’s hands hold on to the edge of the table, as if she’s struggling between storming out and staying.

“You should get some rest now” she manages to say, eyes not meeting your own.

“I’m fine”

Natasha gets ready to argue, but then reconsiders and just nods.

“I’ll leave you to it. Goodnight”

The redhead leaves the room in a hurry, and you wonder what could have possibly made her so upset.

For the next few days, you don’t see Natasha at all, and a part of you is certain she’s avoiding you.

As you lay in bed, watching a movie with Wanda, you keep going back to your interaction. Did you say something offensive? Was she simply too repulsed by weakness and didn’t know how to deal with it?

Is she avoiding me? Am I overthinking?

“She is and you are” Wanda says, her eyes never leaving the screen.

“But why… now wait a minute” you click your tongue, looking at your friend.

“I didn’t mean to, your thoughts are so loud. And so are Natasha’s. When you came back she was having a screaming match inside her head”

“What do you mean? What was she thinking?”

“No, that’s where I draw the line. If you want to know, ask her”

“If I ever see her again, sure” you mutter, though you know you lack the confidence to confront Natasha. Even if you had the chance, what’s there to say? "Hey, why are you making sure we only see each other when strictly necessary?"

She doesn’t like you, that’s the only explanation. Natasha is just being polite to keep appearances and the screaming inside her head was probably her thinking how much she wished you were still at the hospital.

Wanda snorts next to you, making you glare.

“Outta my head”

“Hey, I’m trying to watch the movie. You’re the one that needs to keep it quiet up there”

A few days later and you still have no idea how to approach Natasha. Mind you, she’s only been around the kitchen to get coffee once or twice, spending the rest of her time in missions or at the gym across the Compound.

The only time you’re not thinking about her is when the physical pain is distracting you. Like now, while changing your bandages. The doctors told you to get someone to help, but you already get help with food, laundry, even changing your god damn sheets. You’ll be damned if you ask for help with this.

“Fuckfuckfuck” you clearly did something wrong because the dressing is stuck around the edges. You pull again, but the pain is too much, so you plop down in bed. There’s a knock at the door, and you groan, which will hopefully make whoever’s on the other side go away.

“Y/N? What’s wrong?” Natasha says, rushing to your side.

“Can’t change my bandages” you say, not caring if your incompetence upsets her.

“Can I look?”

You nod, sitting up so she can see for herself the mess you’re in. Her hands are surprisingly soft and tender, and you’re almost dozing off while Natasha works silently.

Except when there’s a tug and you jump back.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry. It’ll be just one painful pull, ok?” the woman says, one of her hands going to your cheek. Your eyes meet and the way she’s looking at you almost makes the pain go away.

“Ok” you nod. Natasha takes it off in a swift movement, and all you can do is take a sharp breath as your skin stings. “Fuck me” you say through gritted teeth.

“I don’t think you’d enjoy it that much with the state you’re in” she jokes, which makes you smile.

“You know what I mean”

“Just teasing”

“You’re certainly good”

Natasha keeps working in silence, and you worry you may have crossed a line. When she’s done, she picks up the trash and goes to throw it away.

“Ask for help next time”

“I need help for everything. I wanted to at least do something on my own without being a burden”

“You’re not a burden” she says, her back to you as she washes her hands on the sink.

Something comes over you, and when Natasha walks by your side to exit the room, your hand shoots up to hold her wrist.

“Y/N?”

“I… I missed you. I know we’re colleagues and all I do is share whatever meal I’m having, or train with you from time to time. I know I can’t really do any of those things right now. I’m inconsequential, I know, to your life and to whatever you do. But I do miss you, Natasha. And I wish I didn’t care so much”

It feels like her skin is burning under your fingers, so you let go, ashamed at your little outburst. You’re expecting her to leave without another word but instead, she kneels to meet your eyes.

“You’re the opposite of inconsequential. But I don’t know how to care without being vulnerable”

“I don’t think that’s possible. Caring is vulnerability” you say softly. “But it’s also a strenght. It means you’re not alone”

Natasha smiles, a genuine smile for the first time in weeks. She’s about to say something else when FRIDAY calls for her at the conference room.

At this hour, it only means one thing. She stands up, looking apologetic.

“Be careful” is all you can say as she leaves the room.

—

A party is the last thing you’re in the mood for. Not only are you still wearing a cane (an improvement from the crutches) but Natasha has been gone for several days to complete a mission only a handful of people know about.

It makes you anxious, to think she might be in danger, though she is the most capable agent in the entire world.

“So glad you made it” Tony says when you finally show up. It took some convincing on Wanda’s part, but you agreed once you found an outfit that didn’t require you to wear heels.

The Avengers are at their own couch, talking and laughing. Bucky has apointed himself as your personal waiter, bringing snacks and drinks.

“Any word on Nat?” Stark asks, which distracts you from the conversation with Sam.

“Said she was still stuck at the debriefing” Steve shrugs his shoulders. It’s no surprise, if she can avoid these parties, Natasha will.

At least she’s home and safe. That brings you some peace of mind, and you’re able to enjoy the rest of the party.

Tony announces the fireworks are about to start, and you relunctantly stand next to the huge crowd assembled at the front yard of the Compound.

The first burts of color is followed by a couple of cheers.

But it’s different for you.

The booming sound, the lights, it all sets you on edge.

You’ve been around explosions before, and this had never happened. Frozen in place, you try to close your eyes and control your breathing as the noises increase your anxiety.

How you wish you could run back to your room right now, but it’s nearly impossible to walk between everyone.

“It’s ok” a voice says, and there’s the warmth of another body next to yours. “You’re ok”

“Nat” you sigh with relief, closing your eyes. Another firework explodes and you jump.

“Look at me” she says, her hand going up and down your back in a soothing motion. You nod, turning your body so she can wrap both arms around your waist. “Breathe with me”

You follow her lead, in and out, until your heartbeat is steady again.

“You’re ok” she says, this time more of a reminder to herself. “And I’m here”

“Thank you” you lean your forehead against hers, letting her decide if she wants to take that final step. Natasha smiles, a hand cupping your cheek as her lips meet yours in a tender kiss.

“I missed you too” she says when you break apart.

“I’m not going anywhere”

[metalfreaks86]

Senior Year | Rating: Mature | 50,728 [30 Chapters]

Author: Skepsiss / Skepsis_Ree

Artist: metalfreaks86

Beta Reader: QoS1312 / midsummer-semantics

[Link to the Fic] | [Link to art]

Pairings: Eddie Munson/Steve Harrington

Characters: Eddie Munson, Steve Harrington, Robin Buckley, Nancy Wheeler, Billy Hargrove

Tags: Slow Burn, steddie, high school romance, after season 2, During Season 3, Post Season 4, Romance, Angst with a Happy Ending, Sharing a Bed, Steve Harrington Queer awakening, Bisexual Eddie Munson, Demisexual Steve Harrington, Biromantic Steve Harrington, Steve Harrington Needs a Hug, Falling In Love, Hurt/Comfort Emotional, Hurt/Comfort Angst and Hurt/Comfort

Trigger Warnings: Underage Drinking, Underage Drug Use, Depression, Anxiety, Eddie flags and has hook ups, Heartbroken, Bullying, use of slurs, Injury, Permanent Disability, recovering from injury in the hospital, fade to black sex scene, briefly described blow jobs

↳ Keep reading below for a summary!

Summary: What happened in Steve’s senior year of high school? We know that he almost failed grade 12, and we know he had ‘lost his groove’ by mid-summer of 1985, but what happened between November 1984 and July 1985? And what if Steve actually made friends with Eddie Munson during that time instead of being alone? Senior Year is a fic about Steve struggling with PTSD and depression through his final months of high school, and how he slowly spiralled downward, making it impossible for him to get into college, and damaging his confidence so badly he couldn’t get a date if he begged. During senior year, Steve does make a connection with Eddie though, and their odd on-again, off-again ‘friendship’ becomes a staple in both their lives. This is a story about coping, the struggles of a broken heart, and making connections. There are genuine, raw moments, but in the end, the connection these two boys have is strong enough to see them through it all—even if it takes them both a long time to realize that they have feelings for one another.

[xirayn]

Another Stonathan scrap featuring Steve domming lightly bullying Jonathan into taking care of himself post season 2.

---

"Get in bed, Byers."

Jonathan throws a glare at Steve before going back to cooking. He feels warm despite the oncoming cold of winter seeping through the inadequate weatherization of the house. At the same time, chills shiver beneath his skin. There is no denying he is sick, but his mother is grieving Bob in addition to working and Will is recovering from being possessed so Jonathan doesn't have the luxury of rest.

Steve grabs his wrist.

"Get," he repeats slowly, "in bed."

He takes the wooden spoon, his grasp gentle yet unyielding. A step into Jonthan's space drives him away from the stove. He continues to glare at the intrusion, his upper lip nearly curling up into a snarl.

"Now," Steve orders without looking up from the mac and cheese he has taken over stirring.

"You can't-"

The protest is cut off by an inquiring look that doesn't dare Jonathan to protest as much as it asks what he could possibly have to say that is worth hearing. Jonathan barely has the energy to stand, much less argue. He still goes to the couch instead of his bed for the sake of his own rebellious spirit.

He wakes without knowing he fell asleep. An afghan has been draped over him and a squeeze bottle is set on the coffee table. He starts to sit up only to be hit with a wave of vertigo that convinces him to stay down. Voices drift in from the kitchen.

“They’re still calling me Zombie Boy.” Will keeps his voice down to let Jonathan sleep. “Jonathan says it’s cool to be a freak, but – “

“It’s not easy,” Steve interrupts. His tone is more genuine than Jonathan thought it was capable of being. “Especially because of people like me who feel like the only way to make ourselves feel bigger is by making others feel small.”

“You aren’t like that anymore, though. Right?”

“I’m trying not to be.”

[imawreck]

Masterlist

Authors note: Hello, and welcome to my collection of chaos. This is where all my fics will be located and linked. Some of my fics might have separate master lists depending on how many parts I publish for them! I tend to write multi-part fics, but if I can hold myself back enough to get out a one-shot, this is where those will be linked! Thanks for visiting :)

Key:

💕Fluff | ❤️‍🔥Smut | 💔 Angst

S.W.A.T.

Who I will write for:

Deacon Kay

Dominique Luca

Jim Street

Tactical Hearts

(Series, On Hiatus)

💕/💔/ ❤️‍🔥 (Future)

Pairing: David "Deacon" Kay x Original Character

Summary: Based in Season 2, S.W.A.T. is bringing in both old and new recruits as they recover from budget cuts. Among those new recruits, is Lily Blake. With her training and experience, she poses potential for the team. Unfortunately, not everyone is willing to overlook her spontaneous nature, or untraditional joining to S.W.A.T. Over time, feelings emerge and friendships are forged... and maybe something more.

Author's note: This is a slow burn romance, so it takes some time to pick up into the actual romance part. Sort of enemies to lovers, and a lot of chaotic behavior, as well as canon violence and such.

Recruit (Part 1)

Marvel Universe

Who I write for/Will write for:

Bucky Barnes/Winter Soldier

Loki

Thor

Spider-Man (Tom or Andrew)

Project G.H.O.S.T.

(Series, On Going)

💔/ 💕

Pairing: Bucky Barnes/Winter Soldier x Original Character

Summary: Bucky assumed he was the last Super Soldier left. But what happens when he finds out that there might still be more like him, that there might be something Hydra cooked up that's worse than him?

Author's Note: This is an older fic I wrote for myself that I ended up carrying on for several parts. If it goes over well here I'll continue it, but for now I'll be posting what is written until there's requests for more or I just feel inspired to continue it.

Unknown (Part 1), Cargo (Part 2), Holding Cell (Part 3), Interrogation (Part 4), Experiments (Part 5), Pancakes (Part 6), Shopping Trip (Part 7), Poetry (Part 8), Perfect Soldier (Part 9), Amends (Part 10)

More in the Masterlist!!!

Project G.H.O.S.T. Masterlist

New Beginning Masterlist

Brooklyn Devil- A Vampire!Bucky Barnes x reader (Series, In Progress)

💔/❤️‍🔥/💕

Summary: A modern supernatural twist on the Marvel Universe where Bucky and Steve are still super soldiers, but their enemy isn’t Hydra. It’s every supernatural lurking on earth. SHIELD is now the organization created to maintain peace and balance between humans and supernaturals, and the Avengers are the elite force of agents sent to take down the most terrible of monsters. What happens when one of their own is turned?

Coven (Part 1)

His- a Winter Soldier x reader (One-Shot)

❤️‍🔥 (Straight Up)

Summary: You and Bucky broke up a few months ago against your wishes, and you’d been trying to move on. When Bucky sees you flirting with another member of the team, he leaves for the next mission to avoid getting in your way. Unfortunately, the mission goes bad, and Bucky isn’t himself when he comes back. He also has a lot to say…

Heaven Scent (Part 1, Coming soon)

Lean On Me- Bucky Barnes x Reader (One-Shot, Requested)

Summary: Reader deals with depression and hasn’t told anyone in fear that they’d think differently of her or treat her differently. Bucky sweeps in to prove she’s wrong.

💔/💕 (Hurt/Comfort)

Moments Stolen- Bucky Barnes x Reader (One-Shot)

Summary: You take some time to spend with your favorite person.

💔(Angst)

Supernatural

Who I will write for:

Dean Winchester

Sam Winchester

Castiel

The Walking Dead

Who I will write for:

Daryl Dixon

Wolfblood

Who I will write for:

Rhydian Morris

Vampire Diaries

Who I will write for:

Damon Salvatore

Elijah Mikaelson

Tyler Lockwood

Kai Parker

Kol Mikaelson

Tags <3

@winchestert101

[profoundjellyfishnight]

my biggest stranger things pet peeve are people who like nuanced characters with progression and development and will say that and in the same breath say that mike is so infuriating and that wills compliments were undeserved and that his entire role is to be els boyfriend. basically, people who try to be analytical and still look at things at surface level. Not even surface level, more like a blurred Google maps image. Like you'll glaze Steves character development bc its so in your face but god forbid they try something more lowkey.

stranger things is an ensemble show and there are arguably three main tiers of characters.

Tier 1: EL, the main character

Tier 2: Mike, Hopper and Nancy, the leaders of each age group introduced in the very first season

Tier 3: everyone else in the intro

That's based off of pure screen time and also the age groupings. Hopper taking charge finding will after the whole thing with the body and Joyce, Nancy avenging barbs death and Mike leading the party trying to also find will.

Mike is quite literally the leader. From the very first episode and all the way to California. He's the everyman and the one who plans out everything. The sauna test, the pen, will being the spy, getting Suzie to hack it was all mike.

He and El only started dating at the end of season 2. And they weren't even together most of the last two seasons. We have like eight actual episodes of them dating. (The Gate, Suzie Do You Copy, Mall Rats, Battle of Starcourt, The Hellfire Club, Vecna's Curse, Papa and the Piggyback.) Outside of the first two episodes of season two, his arc doesn't revolve around El in season two, it's about will and him being possessed. Romance is always a subplot and it's no different with his character.

His arc in season one is all about finding his best friend, season two is about recovering from his trauma, season three is about his attachment issues and season four his self esteem issues. Self esteem issues which were developed since the first season that were sprinkled throughout the show.

Mike himself doesn't understand his importance in the group but the first person max wanted to go to was mike because he's the one who knows what to do. He's the one that always takes charge. The Hawkins groups development revolved around what they were supposed to do when their leader was gone. Nancy taking charge in the main group, which is something that's never happened. (She was in charge when it was only her and Jonathan and when she was in the main group, mike was still planning stuff)

I literally spent half of my lunch period writing some random essay about mike, if they ruin his character next season it's over for me. Whatever. They told me season three ruined mike and it literally made me like him more and the same happened with season four.

Mike 🔝

[nonexistant00tmblr]

Sobs from the small ii2 17 trailer snippet I didn't see before siigghhhh. It's not the real thing yet, but I will ramble anyways. ii2 17 snippet spoilers!!!!! 💯💯↓

That first line from cobs is clearly referring to who might win season 2, as well as the follow up. (Also DAMN! *made* to win is wild. We're still recovering brah 🙏😓. But I really wanna focus on the this↓

This frame implies SO MUCH from so little, so I wanna break down what I can take away from this.

if it's not clear as day, Knife is being detained/cuffed by a Metag. (From what we know in RoTS, Metags have served a security guard-like purpose around the Mecloud, so it'd make sense for Cobs to ask of them to detain Knife, and possibly Suitcase as well.)

Something must have triggered this. I have two ideas for what. 1), Steve wanting to do something with the finalist, or Knife for that matter [such as a change in location], OORRR. - 2), Knife starting an argument/trying to "brutish[ly]" attack Cobs once more. From what we know of Knife AND Cobs, either is possible, but I believe that Steve wants to mess with the finalist a bit, and that this was something he did regardless of the finalists actions in that scene. To add to that, I feel not only Knife but also Suitcase would still be in a deep stange of shock to try and pull any funny business at this point.

Please tell me if I got sumnsumn wrong 🤑🙏

[steddiebang2024]

Senior Year | Mature | 50,728

Author: @skepsiss 

Artist: @metalfreaks86 

Beta Reader: @midsummer-semantics 

[Link to fic] | [Link to art] 

Pairings: Eddie Munson/Steve Harrington 

Characters: Eddie Munson, Steve Harrington, Robin Buckley, Nancy Wheeler, Billy Hargrove 

Tags: Slow Burn, steddie, high school romance, after season 2, During Season 3, Post Season 4, Romance, Angst with a Happy Ending, Sharing a Bed, Steve Harrington Queer awakening, Bisexual Eddie Munson, Demisexual Steve Harrington, Biromantic Steve Harrington, Steve Harrington Needs a Hug, Falling In Love, Hurt/Comfort Emotional, Hurt/Comfort Angst and Hurt/Comfort 

Trigger Warnings: Underage Drinking, Underage Drug Use, Depression, Anxiety, Eddie flags and has hook ups, Heartbroken, Bullying, use of slurs, Injury, Permanent Disability, recovering from injury in the hospital, fade to black sex scene, briefly described blow jobs 

↳ Keep reading below for a summary! 

Summary: What happened in Steve’s senior year of high school? We know that he almost failed grade 12, and we know he had ‘lost his groove’ by mid-summer of 1985, but what happened between November 1984 and July 1985? And what if Steve actually made friends with Eddie Munson during that time instead of being alone? Senior Year is a fic about Steve struggling with PTSD and depression through his final months of high school, and how he slowly spiralled downward, making it impossible for him to get into college, and damaging his confidence so badly he couldn’t get a date if he begged. During senior year, Steve does make a connection with Eddie though, and their odd on-again, off-again ‘friendship’ becomes a staple in both their lives. This is a story about coping, the struggles of a broken heart, and making connections. There are genuine, raw moments, but in the end, the connection these two boys have is strong enough to see them through it all—even if it takes them both a long time to realize that they have feelings for one another.

[antigonenikk]

definitive steve harrington hair ranking by season:

FIRST PLACE: SEASON ONE

no explanation needed. perfectly feathered. joe keery still looks like hes early 20s/late teens and pulls off this look effortlessly. not costumy at all. great length. not too much height. this is the look he should have kept all show long and i am livid hair and makeup changed it up. 10/10.

SECOND PLACE: SEASON FOUR BUT ONLY AFTER HIS HAIR GETS WET

less height looks better on his face shape. the disgusting shadow of a mustache ruins the look but the little flop of hair over the forehead is trying to salvage things. we wont discuss any other season 4 steve hair bc it was so bad i pretend it does not exist. 6.5/10

THIRD PLACE:

season two….. where it all went wrong. the death of steve as a character and the birth of the steve harrington shaped cardboard cut-out. the mullet was a foolish error. the departure from the beautiful feathering and the switch to focusing on height was a crucial mistake that we have never recovered from. joe still looks youthful enough but hes beginning to age rapidly from drug abuse and the hair is not helping. last gasp of his believability as a teen. i will give points bc his members only jacket look was iconic. 4/10

LAST PLACE: SEASON THREE

this look is awful on him. too much height. badly done highlights. not enough layering. joe obviously abusing cocaine behind the scenes bc the coke bloat was over the top. looks like a 27 year old fool playing a high schooler. understandable that all those girls turned him down. 🩷 2/10

[elegantjellyfishwerewolf]

Why I don't like "Wizards"

In general, I think that the "Stories of Arcadia" began to slide after the release of "Three from Heaven", but more on that later. In this post there will be many comparisons of "Wizards" with "Trollhunters" due to the fact that they are a direct continuation.

1. The first thing I didn't like was that the narration was too fast, and if this is still acceptable in the first series, then in the rest such narration begins to annoy, because it does not allow you to delve into the story and concentrate on at least one action.

For example, already in the second series, a lot of things happen: the arrival at Arthur's castle, the interaction of Claire and Morgana, the acquaintance of Jim and Deya, Steve becomes a knight, the trolls escape from Camelot. Of course, there are episodes in which the narrative goes normally, for example, in 4 episod, but basically the story does not have the ability to concentrate on one moment and continues to throw out new information to us.

2.The second problem, for me personally, is the characters. 1. I really didn't like that Steve's intelligence was cut so much, he wasn't a very smart character before either, but he could still come up with interesting ideas to solve problems (for example, when in the second season he guessed to use umbrellas to help trolls), but then they made a complete jerk out of him who, throughout the entire viewing, only irritates with his tantrums. If you remove him from the series, literally nothing will change, because his "knight's arch" didn't really lead to anything. After the battle of Kilahed Bridge, he says he will continue Lancelot's cause and bring back the Knights of the Round Table, but in the end he did nothing of it. 2. Another character who, in my opinion, has become worse in "Wizards" is Claire. I'm the only one who thinks that in the two weeks she spent in Camelot, she became too good at using shadow magic, considering that she studied with Douxie, who himself said he didn't understand anything about shadow magic. And even after becoming such a professional magician, for some reason she still can't guess to open a portal under Jim and only then, after escaping from the fortress of the Secret Order, try to bring him to his senses, BUT NO! Instead, she tries to convince Jim to enter the portal himself, and when she tries to open the portal under him, Morgana has already arrived by then, and she has to retreat. 3.The third character is Douxie. I immediately say that I do not hate him, the only thing that confuses me is his age. He is 900 years old, just think about this figure! And with all this, he behaves like a teenager who is 18-19 years old. The authors are trying to show us that he has changed since the events in Camelot by showing his younger version, but these changes can happen in a maximum of 2 or 5 years, BUT NOT IN 900 YEARS!!!! While watching it, the thought did not leave me that it was a 900-year-old man who, for some reason, continues to behave like a teenager.

4.Morgana. After The Wizards, I hated her. The authors tried to make her an ambiguous character, but in the end they created a bunch of plot holes. In Wizards, she says she wants to help all magical creatures, but in Troll Hunters, when Angor asked her for help, she tricked him into serving her and killing Merlin's champions. She also stole troll children and used creepy experiments to turn them into changelings (also against their will). Yes, even in the series itself, she contradicts herself when she gives Gunmar a sword that can control the mind. 5. The secret Order. I have no doubt that the authors came up with these characters only when they were writing the script for "Wizards", and that they did not exist initially. Because after the battle on the Kilahed Bridge, they say they will now try to change the world. AND THEY DECIDED TO DO IT ONLY AFTER 900 YEARS!!! SERIOUSLY!!!!!! You say that they have been recovering all this time, but I will say that only Belrog needed to be restored, and the rest of the Order members could try to carry out their plan to steal the seals alone. AND WHERE WERE THEY WHEN GUNMAR AND MORGANA ARRANGED ETERNAL NIGHT?!!?! I very much doubt that magicians of their level would not have felt such a strong release of magical energy.

3.Plot holes. There are too many of them! Literally in every episode I noticed one or another plot hole. Of those that were very noticeable: 1. Deya could not be the first hunter because Kanjigar said that troll hunters tried to kill Gunmar many times, but never won. 2. Morgana couldn't create a changeling in a couple of days, which also grew so fast. 3. When the moment came to conclude a deal between Angor and Morgana. 4. Creeper's poison created the Order of Janus, changelings could not create an order in a couple of days, and Morgana could not create such a number of changelings. 5.In the third season of trollhunters there was shown the battle of Merlin and Morgana and it had happened not only in another place but also there was no Douxie on the scene. 6. Blinky said that the confrontation between Merlin and Morgana lasted for centuries, as a result, it happened within a couple of days.

There were also many minor inconsistencies in the plot: 1. The battle on the Kilahed Bridge was different from the one we were shown in the third season of "Troll Hunters".

2. The design of the Deya is different from the statue in the forge of heroes.

3. WHY THE HELL CAN MORGANA OPEN PORTALS WITHOUT A STAFF?! Then why didn't she just create a portal in the finale of the third season and fly out of it? 4. The process of creating the amulet is different from what we were shown in the third season.

5. Where did Belrog get the staff of shadow if it was destroyed in the finale of the third season? AND WHERE DID THIS STAFF GO AFTER THE EIGHTH EPISODE?!! 6. The hand that is used to create the amulet is also different from the one that was shown to us in "Troll Hunters".

7. During Morgana's incarceration, she was wearing a helmet and a raincoat. 8.Wendel's appearance is also different from the one that was shown to us in "Troll Hunters".

(This is probably going to sound like a quibble, but why didn't Jim react to Draal in any way?)

And this is the main reasons why I can't perceive wizards as a direct continuation of the trollhunters series.

4.Of course, there were moments in this show that I liked, for example, the acquaintance of Blinky and Aarrg, the storyline of Merlin and Douxie, but, alas, the cons in this show outweighed the pros for me.

[gayofthefae]

Ftr I have strong reasons about themes and messaging for all main characters to live but here's also a speed run of one category of reason:

Max, Hopper, Will, El - repeat, (other categories also include repeat of Joyce's boyfriends and El's siblings)

Anyone Nancy is close to (Jonathan, Mike, Robin, Karen, Holly) - she's still recovering from Barb

Anyone Dustin is close to (Steve especially, Mike, Will, Lucas) - too soon from Eddie

Anyone Joyce is close to (Hopper, Jonathan, Will, El) - she's still recovering from Bob and already went through losing a kid

Anyone Lucas is close to (Max, Dustin, Will, Mike) - too soon from Max

El for Hopper - he already lost a daughter

El's siblings, mom, or Hopper (Will, Jonathan, Joyce, Hopper) - she already lost her siblings, mom, and Hopper (and Papa - which is grief rewatch 4x04)

Anyone Max is close to (Lucas, El, Dustin) - she's barely recovering from Billy

Anyone close to Jonathan (Joyce, Will, El, Nancy) - we saw how he dealt with losing Will

So safe characters in just this category so far are: Steve, Robin, Jonathan, Dustin, Mike, Will, El, Max, Lucas, Hopper, Joyce, Karen, Holly, Nancy.

Every death has to be grieved. Some of these characters haven't finished grieving another death, the death of the same role in their life, or the same person's death. They cannot convince audiences of a happy ending within 2 episodes after establishing that these characters grieve for multiple seasons.

Also, by "wouldn't" I don't just mean emotionally, I mean they're good writers and wouldn't write something they know they can't resolve.

Also, here's your periodic reminder that they have never killed a main protagonist in the history of this show. Single season regulars or antagonists only.

But guys, you're good. Just a reminder with new photo of Mike and Hop on the bench...you're good. Whoever it is, if you have concerns for someone not on this particular list, comment and I will explain their safety to you. But you're good. Also, I think I listed everybody anyways lol. So ig...they're all safe but there are more reasons why (like not killing suicidal people as a general rule of thumb, for example)

[whotf-atemywaffles]

MasterList

+ Release Dates 

Last Updated: August 31st 2023

The Summer I Turned Pretty 

Conrad Fisher

I’ll Be There For You

August 19th, 2023

Summary: Belly, Conrad, Y/N, Jeremiah, and Stephen, five childhood friends whose friendship is tested when Conrad and Y/N start a secret relationship. Belly initially feels betrayed and hurt, but with the help of Jeremiah and Stephen, the group is able to reconcile and repair their friendship

Jeremiah Fisher

So Much For summer Love

September 1st 2023

Summary: Belly has always been in love with Conrad Fisher, but she's been seeing his brother Jeremiah. As the summer draws to a close, Belly feels more distant from Jeremiah, who breaks up with her. She starts spending more time with Conrad, hoping to make Jeremiah jealous. Meanwhile, Jeremiah realizes his feelings for Y/N go beyond friendship and tells her, and they start dating. Belly and Conrad also start a relationship, and everything falls into place.

Call it what you want

September 8th 2023

Summary: Jeremiah and Y/N initially bicker and argue when they meet at a beach house, but they find themselves drawn to each other. Despite their constant fighting, they start spending more time together and Jeremiah falls for Y/N. Y/N is hesitant due to past experiences, but Jeremiah proves himself to be different and they share a passionate kiss on the beach. Y/N confides in her best friend Stephen about her conflicting emotions and he advises her to be honest with herself. Y/N decides to give Jeremiah a chance and they walk off into the sunset together, ready to explore their newfound connection.

Stephen Coklin

Through Thick and thin

August 19th, 2023

Summary: Stephen is hopelessly in love with Y/N, but she only sees him as a friend… or so he thinks. One day, Y/N surprises him with a kiss and they spend the summer together. They start dating officially the following year and fall even more in love. They face challenges, including a long-distance relationship when Y/N moves to New York for a job, but they never lose sight of their love for each other. After three years, Y/N moves back to Pennsylvania and they walk towards the future, hand in hand, ready to face anything together.

Marvel

Bucky Barnes

We'll be a fine line, We'll be alright

October 6th 2023

summary: Bucky Barnes, recovering his memory, finds the love of his life, Y/N, who is now a SHIELD agent. They work together to stop HYDRA and save the world, but Y/N is badly injured. Bucky reveals his true identity to her, they fight harder than ever, and Bucky promises to return to her. After months of waiting, Bucky comes back to Y/N, and they overcome every obstacle together. They fight side by side and defeat their enemy, but not without a cost. Bucky is injured, and Y/N tends to his wounds. They watch the sunset together, knowing that they are meant to be together forever.

What Was I made for? (3 Parts) 

Summary: Y/n was childhood friends with Steve and Bucky, who both loved her. After the war broke out, the two friends started fighting over her attention, causing her to distance herself from both of them. She eventually took the super soldier serum and became an assassin for Hydra, but was able to break free from their control with the help of Steve and Bucky's memories. She fell in love with Tony Stark, but decided to end their relationship to focus on being a part of the Avengers. She later fell in love with Bucky and helped him escape from Hydra. They faced challenges together, but were ready to face anything as long as they had each other.

Part 1  (What was I made for?) OCtober 13th 2023

Part 2 (I can See you) October 20th 2023

Part 3 (Eyes Open) October 27th 2023

Stick Season

Sept 4th 2023

After being left heartbroken by Bucky, you research how to bring back those lost to the Snap and finally succeed with Scott Lang's help. You find Bucky in Romania, realizing you still love each other. You both return to the Avengers compound and catch up with the team. You vow to never let anything come between you again and fight to protect the world together.

Harry Potter 

Cedric Diggory 

Gold rush

September 29th 2023

Summary: Y/n and Cedric were both Hogwarts champions in the Triwizard Tournament, initially rivals but eventually becoming close friends and even more. They faced challenges together, including a battle against Death Eaters and Voldemort, and ultimately realized that they had found something special in each other. They continued to support each other in all their endeavors and remained together.

The Hunger Games 

Finnick Oadir 

Opposites Attract 

September 15th 2023

Summary: In the Hunger Games, Finnick and Y/N initially clashed due to their opposing personalities, but they were forced to work together in the Quarter Quell. After Y/N got hurt, Finnick cared for her and they started to see each other in a new light. Finnick confessed his feelings and they became inseparable, emerging from the Hunger Games as victors and a couple.

Twilight

Edward Cullen 

Soon You’ll get better (Cause you have to)

September 22 2023

Summary: A girl named Y/N is battling cancer, again,  and meets a boy named Edward Cullen who becomes her only friend. As her condition worsens, Edward decides to turn so they can be together forever. They face the challenges of their new life together and make the most of the time they have left.

Jasper Hale

Coming soon

[kiirotoao]

I keep getting asked what I’d like to see / theories for s5, so I’m listing them here!

(In blurb form because I have too many lol)

MORE. WILLEL. OR. DEATH. I’d particularly love some parallels from s1, maybe Will talking to El in the void or something? Because

Will has powers!! I’d love to see him have some kind of time/energy/electrical/celestial powers to mirror his Will the Wise persona

JOPPER WEDDING OR DEATH ALSO THIS IS A NON NEGOTIABLE DUFFERS

Robin being a BAMF and impressing Vickie or vice versa (I’m currently more sold on Robin being the BAMF because if switched that’s just Ronance. Which also. Ronance endgame please and thank you???)

Stonathan endgame or at least bonding. Can you tell that the CGI snippets made me insane

Flickergate duh

Pocketgate!!! And specifically Mike confessing to Will, Will thinking it’s too good to be true, then Mike pulling out the letter to prove it in dear desperation

Based on the “6 little nuggets” anecdote, I think Steve might unfortunately be toast because he has his dream with The Party, y’know

There will be a dragon of some sort based on Will’s painting? Maybe like Vecna, the Mind Flayer, and the demogorgons will combine into one big ugly creature to defeat? Dramatic but I have no idea

The spores might also be more lethal and infect people? Or maybe cause widespread hallucinations? They were everywhere in that finale and that cannot be healthy. Yes I know that Hopper and Dustin didn’t suffer any side effects of them in s2 but Vecna’s still alive so I think maybe they could become a new force

I believe in the Kas theory! But not for Eddie. I’m between Kas being Will, El, or Mike

I hope that Nancy doesn’t end up with anyone or it’s implied that she, Steve, and Jonathan, are happy being single for that time until they completely understand themselves and what they want

Vecna appearing in nightmares!! I’d love to see the subconscious come into play and it would serve to flesh out our main cast even more than they already are (especially Mike Wheeler and his internal gay crisis)

Jonathan, Mike, Lucas, Erica, and Murray in the Upside Down please!! They have never been that’s why, and no, I don’t count the tunnels in s2 because they didn’t flip upside down to enter those so I don’t think it was quite the Upside Down

Full and integrated Hopper-Byers family scene at the end of the season. Like them playing Monopoly or something or just existing together in the same house. Being happy. Please dear God.

Will coming out to his mom or Jonathan or Dustin or Lucas or anyone, really

EVERYBODY WANT TO RULE THE WORLD BY TEARS FOR FEARS preferably in the ending scene but anywhere would suffice and I’m not saying this just because I love this song but the lyrics literally fit so well I don’t think I’ll recover if his song isn’t in s5

A gate may exist at the library - it’s in the center of the earthquake and it’s where Will was taken in s1. I think Henry may want to destroy it because it contains so much information

I’d love a s2 parallel where Lucas talks to his dad again. Maybe about Max, maybe about all the stress, something. More sweet parent moments

Based off of the Byler fights in episodes 3 (s3) and 2 (s4), I think maybe they’ll fight again in s5e1?

And then resolve by s5e5

Wherein Heros (Bowie’s og version) will play when Mike and Will kiss

I just really really want Dustin being the lord of the demodogs. Like d’Art returns and recognizes Dustin and they help to fight against Vecna like fighting fire with fire it’d be so epic you see the vision right?

I’d love to see a return of Kali!! Either as a friend or villain recruited/controlled by Vecna it’d be pretty cool either way

Max lives. Period

[ymaohoh]

Hellcheer addition! (ignoring the 1 like thing as I just want to write about these two crazy kids) 1. Chrissy being single. 2. So I don't have just one, but the music from the soundtrack 'I wouldn't remember me either' which plays for them? It's a beaut! (bit of a cop-out answer this one, sorry). 3. The ship observed by other people (so alternative POV's - Max, Jason, Dustin etc.) 4. Has to be my own as we only got one damn episode. 5. In the woods, when Chrissy says 'me?' so cute and Eddie is just soft and silly. 6. When Eddie heads back to the trailer with Steve/Nancy/Robin in the Upside Down and there's just a missing 'oh shit this is where Chrissy died' moment I would have liked to see. 7. (god this is tough as there's loads) Eddie being really really into eating Chrissy out. 8. I've seen a lot of fics that take Jason's character maybe too far (though yeah, he was a lunatic in the show). I don't think he'd harm Chrissy. 9. The 'opposites attract' angle. They have no business being so perfect for one another - but they are (second option would be how hot they are as a couple). 10. That Eddie would have to step on Jason's toes pretty severely (thanks Joe) and it would be messy. Ideally Chrissy would end it before getting with Eddie. 11. Deffo canon, thanks, but yeah I need them to come back to life in season 5 for more... Time travel? Alternative universe? Come on, Duffer Brothers. 12. Baldur's Gate 3... I could see them both as Bard's but maybe Chrissy could be a Cleric. Chrissy's BFF is clearly Karlach and Lae'zel scares tf out of Eddie (someone write me a crossover with the whole party being there?) 13. Eddie's easier to write than Chrissy, I think. Some authors really NAIL Eddie. 14. I've not been drawn to another pairing from Stranger Things in the same way - but I do like Chrissy shipped basically with anyone ('cause she's pretty). 15. Chrissy. I'd give her a big hug and we'd hang out watching 80's flicks. My girl needs love and take out. 16. The only way I could see this playing out is if one of them tries being all stupid noble and self-sacrificing. Eddie might so Chrissy goes to college (if she wants to stay behind with him) and Chrissy might because she doesn't want him to get hurt by Jason etc. It wouldn't last. 17. I think so - both have vulnerable spots which everyone can relate to. I find myself very similar to Chrissy (especially at her age). 18. I didn't like Eddie leaving Wayne to find Chrissy's body, but I get that's a character choice and he was scared af. 19. Lots? (and I'm new to the fandom). More are incoming, sorry. 20. You know, I didn't get sucked in when I first watched season 4 but on a re-watch? Yeah. I have no control over my fixations and I re-watched when I was recovering from surgery so...plenty of time to go mad? 21. I'm an angst girl. Always have been (but the smut is HOT too).

(psss pass it on - what do ya'll think?)

Template by @aph-cb 

[metalheadcowboy]

Turning a Harringrove Cowboy/Farm AU I wrote A LONGGGG time ago into an actual multi part/chapter fic, so here's the first part, enjoy!

-----------------------

It was the spring of '84 when Steve Harrington first decided he hated Billy Hargrove with every damn bone in his body.

The beginning of that spring had been particularly rough in many ways. 

Steve's second senior year of high school was going quite a ways away from great, it seemed like no matter what his old man was pissed off about something or another, the calving season had only just started and it was going straight to shit. Oh, and on top of that, it was hotter than a witches tit outside, a record high in southern Indiana that year, great.

"Gah lee," Steve huffed as he fell flat on his rear, wiping the sweat off his forehead, with the part of his arm that wasn't covered in cow crap and god knows what, "That 'as one big son 've a bitch." The force of his collapse knocked his Stetson hat clean off, but he was quick to recover the rather expensive item he’d received for Christmas not too long ago. 

He slowly collected himself, pushing the medium tan leather down upon his dark, messy waves. He couldn’t help but blink his eyes a few times as he practically panted like a dog to will any form of cold into his body, "Yeah, 'll least this one's livin'," his dad remarked, and he couldn't disagree with that. Seemed like they'd had more still born calves than live ones this season.

" 'Ts only March, we've got a few months," The teen reminded, manifesting at least a shred of hope for the coming weeks. It wasn't that they didn't have calves other times of the year, they were just few and far between. Now was the time when they started raising a good sized herd to sell of at the beginning of next spring to support them most of the year round, besides the practical penny change they made selling their cows milk local, "Good job, mama," he praised the brown and white blotched animal next to him, already akin to new motherhood, licking her almost identical oversized calf like she knew nothing else.

Steve willed himself up off the ground onto shaky knees, this day had been one of his longest in a while. School on top of all the heifers seeming to want to calf at the exact same time. But as he looked past their property line, out into the marvelous bubblegum pink and creamsicle sunset, he found some sliver of peace.

Only the voice of his father snapped him out of his blissful moment of zoning out, seemed like he was doing a lot more of that lately "You best go wash up 'fer dinner, you know your ma ain't gon' have you at the table lookin' that way." He was right and Steve knew it, but he couldn't lie, a hot shower did sound pleasant on his aching joints.

He gave a quick "Yes sir," ending what was probably the tamest conversation they'd had in weeks, before making the short, yet long trek back to their homestead. He could see the lights on in the kitchen and living room, and as he got closer he came upon the silhouette of his mother washing her hands in the kitchen sink in the small window next to their side door.

He trotted up the last few stairs, smiling as he walked through the door to someone just as happy to greet him, "Well, look what the hot mess express brought in, my word sweetie," she said with no real malice, grinning at him like he was her pride and joy, which he was.

"Hi mama," he replied plainly, chuckling softly as she came over and pulled his nearly six foot frame down to her 5 '2 height for a kiss on the side of his head.

His chuckle turned into a full chested laugh when she made a fake gag of disgust, "You smell just 'bout right rank, son. You sure the heifers weren't the ones hackin' it up at your stink?" she teased and Steve just shook his head.

"Had my arm so far up one of 'em I'm prolly 'bout half cow any how," The brunette boy mimicked the struggle sticking his arm up the back end of a cow, to which Annette Harrington grimaced, "That's why I let you boys do your thing and I do mine," she gestured to the kitchen, which is what first alerted Steve to the smell of freshly made chicken pot pie sitting ready on the ceramic countertop. 

His eyes immediately lit up with pure delight, like a kid on Christmas morning, except he was nineteen and to some sad extent pot pie was the highlight of his week, “Mama you didn’t!” he exclaimed, about to go in for a big hug before remembering what he was covered in. 

Mrs. Harrington just shook her head, “Alright, go get cleaned up, the pie ain’t gon’ grow legs.” Within an instant Steve was racing off to his bedroom to grab a pair of pajamas and then to his bathroom to shower. 

And to say he was right would have been an understatement. Steve swore the hot stream of water that cascaded down his spine sent him into seventh heaven, easing out his jammed knee and stiff elbow with ease. 

He enjoyed his escape for about as long as the hot water lasted, a mere few minutes, but that was long enough for him. When he stepped out of the shower he shook his hair out like a wet dog, letting the towel he scrubbed his head with next catch the excess. Shortly after, he grabbed the comb up next to his sink, swiping the steam off the mirror to give his unruly mop a good brush through before quickly throwing on the pajamas he had grabbed prior. 

Steve practically burst through the bathroom door, following the promising scent of dinner, blatantly stopping in his tracks when he found something that was definitely not chicken pot pie. 

“Oh, Steven,” Oh boy, “We have someone we’d like ‘fer you to meet.” The smile on his moms face was sickeningly different from that she had on when welcoming him in from his chores. A lot less genuine and a lot more plastic, but still warm in the way it always was, it was just her nature. 

Steve didn’t say anything for a few seconds, taking in the atmosphere, his parents, that boy. He would be lying if he said the golden-haired figure standing between his folks didn’t look straight out of one of the magazines he’d seen the few times they went into the city. 

Striking icy blue eyes, rimmed with lashes that damn near put any woman’s to shame. Thick brows somehow shaped to perfection, lain a top skin so perfectly sun kissed and freckled with intent. Steve had to force himself to shake these thoughts, knowing how damn stupid he must have looked gawking like an idiot. But that didn’t push away the confusion he felt as his heart seemed to pick up at the statuesque mystery man standing before him. 

“If they’d ‘a told me we were having’ company I would’ve thought to dress a ‘lil nicer ‘n this,” he remarked, cheeks burning a bit with embarrassment, feeling almost stark naked in his pajama pants and plain white t-shirt. He huffed out a short breath when the guy in front of him gave him a rather unconvincing pity laugh, parents following suit, “Ain’t no skin off my back, ‘m sure we’ll see each other in worse,” the radiant boy replied, once again leaving Steve baffled, but maybe that’s just what he did. 

“Names Billy by the way, Billy Hargrove” the boy- Billy extended his hand for Steve to take and he did, taking the few steps forward to give his hand a proper shake before returning the favor, “Steve Harrington, pleasure’s mine,” he replied simply with a short nod of his head. 

His father seemed pleased enough by this interaction, though Steve could never really tell, he always had this sort of stone cold thing going on. 

There was a beat of somewhat awkward silence before Annette interjected, “How about some homemade pot pie?” she offered, with a prompt clap of her hands, sending her boys and their guest to the dinner table. Normally Steve would have been beaming, ready to talk and talk and talk about anything and everything under the sun, but suddenly he wasn’t exactly in the mood. 

“Well, Billy we really are glad to have ya here,” Mr. Harrington continued in the tone he only used around guests or, really, people he was trying to impress. The sickeningly sweet, layered on false happiness and enthusiasm that made Steve’s stomach hurt, “Yeah, ‘ll y’know my old man’s been rearin’ to get me out of the house since the second I stepped foot outta school,” Hm, so he was older, “Since I graduated early ‘n all, couldn’t happen fast ‘nough.” The lanky boy nearly spit out his water, choking in an awkward way to where it came halfway up his nose and made his eyes water. 

Steve coughed it out a bit before bringing his napkin up to his face, watery eyes of shame blinking themselves dry, “Y’ alright there cowboy?” Cowboy, Steve looked up at the smirk on the other boy’s face and had to hold back a sneer. The last thing he needed tonight was to get into it with his dad while they had company over. 

“ ‘M fine, thanks,” he mumbled, feeling the short- lived rage in his stomach settle when his mother brought the meal over just in time, “Shall we?” she chimed in a sing-song tone, that wasn’t anything like his fathers, hers was genuine. Because if there was one thing about Annette Harrington, she didn’t have a mean bone in her body for anyone, unless they messed with her family. 

Steve tuned out the prayer, forehead pressed solidly against his hands clasped so tight his knuckles were about ghostly white. He was just wondering when this Billy guy was going to leave so this night could be over. But of course, just when the brunette thought the topic might change, of course, even after the prayer, his father, John, had to dwell. 

“I’ll say that’s right impressive, y’know Steve here’s held back a year, he’s ‘sposed to have graduated by now, but,” Mr. Harrington shrugged as he dug into his dinner. His son sat there halfway gobsmacked, halfway offended, but he should’ve expected such. 

Steve scoffed, “Only ‘cus you got me doin’ half your work every day. I barely got time for anythin’ else,” he mumbled under his breath just loud enough for the table to hear as he stared down at his mashed potatoes. But that didn’t mean he couldn’t feel his fathers eyes boring into his skull like laser beams. 

Steve’s mom just looked at him with a disappointed expression, but didn’t interject because she knew good and well it was true, “ ‘F that’s whatcha really think ‘n you’ll be happy to hear you won’t have to do it no more.” Steve’s eyebrows practically shot up his forehead and through his hairline. 

What the hell was he talkin’ ‘bout?

“Huh?” Was all he could manage before his dad excitedly cut off whatever he was planning to say next, “Well what else do you think we got Billy here for, looks?” This gave everyone but Steve a good laugh, he didn’t see any reason to be laughing right now. 

“ ‘N just what ‘o you mean by that?” He was so blinded by anger that he couldn’t even think about eating the pot pie his sweet mother had made, but he’d get over that guilt. He couldn’t say the same for the fury burning deep within him. He looked over at Billy who looked smug as ever, chewing on a bit of his food, sneaky eyes peeking out of the rim of his rather ratty looking Resistol. Oh what he would give right now to punch that smug look right off that pretty boy face. 

John Harrington gave Steve the look, his signature look that said ‘I dare you to go testin’ me, boy’ and if there was ever a time for that it would be now, “Steve, you’ve been slacking lately ‘n we both know it, son.” Steve went to open his mouth but got cut off, again, “ ‘N I figured having Billy stay here ‘n work with me ‘d give you the time off to do sumn else. Like helpin’ your mom ‘round the house, you did always seem… better suited for those things.” 

This couldn’t be fuckin’ for real, “John-,” his mom tried to scold. 

There’s no way his dad just basically called him a sissy, not after-

“I had my hand up a cow’s ass ‘fer you today, ‘n then you’re gonna go sayin’ that- that bullshit?” Steve burst, knowing he would no doubt have to pay for these words later. He felt tears pricking the corners of his eyes, not from guilt, not from shame, but of pure, unfiltered rage. But what really put salt in the wound was looking over at Billy, whose subtle smirk had far faltered, turning into something more innocent, more regretful. Like this wasn’t all his own damn fault in the first place. 

Everything’s so unfair, this is so unfair. Not only did he feel hurt, but he felt embarrassed, having his dad say those things about him, basically calling him a sissy, in front of his own mother. 

“Steven-” he heard his father try to reprimand, but Steve refused to take it. Instead, he stood up abruptly, the straightening of his knees sent his chair flying backwards against the wall. He would have cringed at the sound if he weren’t so genuinely pissed. 

He was able to hold the tears in until he turned around, then it was like the dam just… burst. He felt a whine work its way up his throat, but he willed it back down, swallowing what last bit of pride he had left down with it. 

Could a sissy do that? Maybe Steve didn’t want the answer to that. 

He didn’t know what was going on, he’d never felt this was, this upset, this angry. He didn’t understand. He practically glid to his room, socked feet moving so fast he wasn’t sure whether or not he was actually taking real steps. And, frankly, he didn’t care, just wanted to be away. 

When he made it to his room, he closed his door behind him and flopped down onto his bed, stomach down, choking on his own hushed sobs. It made him feel like a child again, pathetic, small, lonely. He turned on his side and curled in on himself a bit, clinging on to whatever little bit of comfort he could. 

Through wallowing in his own self pity, he barely heard the faint mewl coming from behind him. He just groaned, hoping maybe if he ignored it long enough it, or rather she, would go away. 

“Meooowww.” He should’ve known better, it was his fault for locking her in there with him anyways. 

“Oh, Ginger,” he sighed, stuffy nose making him sound all nasally. And it was as if that was the permission the rather plump orange tabby needed to jump up on top of him like he was her human pillow, “Cain’t a man even have a few seconds alone.” To that, of course, she meowed at him in protest, ever the chatterbox. 

Steve quickly accepted his defeat to the tubby cat when she somehow still gracefully jumped off his ribs and onto the empty spot in bed next to him. The pale light of bright stars shining through his window, reflecting off of Ginger’s big round saucer eyes were the only thing giving his room any light. But it didn’t matter because soon after he shut his own eyes, focusing on the purring of the seemingly content cat next to him, half wishing to disappear, half wishing to go back out there and beat Billy to a pulp. Even if only for existing.

Billy, stupid Billy and his stupid white teeth and his stupid pretty eyes and his stupid everything.

Fuck this dinner, fuck this day, and most importantly fuck Billy Hargrove.