#step eight: repeat as many times as necessary

[chaosnojutsu]

What he’s doing is a direct violation of the United Nations’ Universal Declaration of Human Rights.

[ID in alt text]

If you’ll direct your attention to Article 5 and refer to the headline about Abbott, someone please correct me if I’m wrong, but I think most would agree that requiring employees to perform manual labor in temperatures above 100° F without providing them adequate means of hydration constitutes “cruel, inhuman or degrading treatment.” Furthermore, it might be a stretch but one could say that since water is necessary to life, Abbott’s actions also violate Article 3.

And you can argue that “they should bring their own water” if you want. I’m not out there on the construction sites every day, so I can’t imagine what it’s like or make up what rules/policies are in place concerning the matter. But as someone who also lives in Texas and experiences these temperatures and their effects on a day to day basis, while spending most of my miserable time indoors with the air conditioning on, working around the house but definitely not performing construction, and has chugged more water in the past month than I have in the past five years combined (and I wish that was an exaggeration)… I’d venture to say that these workers already are bringing their own water. But there’s no way to refill or replace water consumed. They’re probably finishing it off in the first half hour of work and then suffering the rest of the day. Or maybe they’re rationing it so they can make it through the day relatively hydrated. I honestly can’t tell you which one sounds more horrifying, but I can tell you beyond a shadow of a doubt that those things are happening.

(Side anecdote: Texas has a University Interscholastic League of which most, if not all, school districts are a part of. UIL is taken incredibly seriously across the state, including enforcement of rules at any and every academic/athletic practice or contest to the nth degree. The UIL rules concerning groups that practice outdoors (football, marching band, etc.) require frequent water breaks. It’s odd to me that, given Texas’ abysmal education system and its rapidly worsening state under Abbott’s administration, there are strict mandates regarding the health and safety of student competitors— as there should be, but guess what, UIL is not a government entity and they still managed to implement those rules and put the fear of god into anyone who dares disobey— but not for paid laborers. It’s almost as if Greg Abbott is so bigoted that he doesn’t care about the lives of the predominantly POC construction workers and doesn’t care who knows it.)

So weaponize your horror. Call my governor about it. Call YOUR government about it. Call the ACLU and the UN about it. Because even if I’m wrong and this is somehow technically legal and there’s “nothing we can do about it,” at least we tried something to stand up to our oppressors and make life less miserable for each other.

And don’t you dare say a word about Texans “getting what we deserve for living in a red state” when there are so many marginalized groups who simply cannot leave at this point in time, especially when our attorney general was impeached earlier this month and admitted to blocking millions of votes in the last election cycles so that the GOP would win. Had Ken Paxton not done that, Beto O’Rourke would have ousted Ted Cruz, Trump would not have won Texas, and Abbott would not be emboldened to take action this heinous with so many political adversaries in office, if he were even still in office.

Their goal is cruelly and death to minorities, especially with this sadistic ruling.

[lil-shiro]

Highlights from a recent New York Times article on Aston Martin

Don't know why, but the New York Times published a whole article about AM's season, here are some key points.

Words from Fernando about his season:

“It has been a historical season for Aston Martin, and for myself, eight finishes on the podium, more than 200 points, nearly 300 for the team."

“Twelve months ago, this was unthinkable. An incredible year to remember.”

“For me, 2012 and this season are the best in my career,” he said, referring to his third season with Ferrari, when he missed out on a third title by 4 points. This year resulted in “a position I couldn’t have imagined at the beginning of the year with the car performance we had,” he said.

Dan Fallows about the development of the car in the second half of the season:

The reason for Aston Martin’s slide was “a very aggressive development philosophy in-season,” Fallows said. “We decided to try to be quite brave, quite risky, in some instances, in terms of the speed of delivery of these parts.”

Looking back, Fallows said, the team would probably choose not to make some of the decisions it did, but it valued the learning experience.

“Towards the end of the season, we used some races essentially as glorified test sessions in many ways,” he said, adding, “We felt that was necessary to understand the car and to understand what we want to do for next year.”

Mention of the new factory:

There was disruption along the way as Aston Martin moved into a new $250 million factory in May. It was the first phase of a three-part project that includes the team building its own wind tunnel and simulator, going online in the third quarter of 2024. The team currently uses the Mercedes facility.

“We moved into a new technology campus, which is only a third complete,” Fallows said. “We have had several upheavals during the year, with that being one of them."

“But we don’t have the level of facilities, the stability of structure, that some of our main competitors enjoy, and yet we’ve still been able to compete at that level.”

Lawrence Stroll addressing the minor share he sold:

Last month, he sold a minority share in the team to Arctos Partners, a private equity firm in Dallas.

“You don’t go spending hundreds of millions of pounds, building the greatest new Formula 1 campus and hiring 400 of the greatest employees if you’re about to leave the business,” Stroll said.

He added: “It could not be any further from the truth that I have any interest in ever not being the majority shareholder of this team for a very long time, and it is the same with the road car company. I’m not going anywhere. I plan to run these businesses for many years. I’m at the beginning of the journey on both.”

Quote from Lance about his season:

“It was a really strong start to the season, a really difficult middle and then strong again at the end,” Lance Stroll said. “There is some stuff I can chip away at for next year. Overall, it’s been a season full of emotion.”

Tom McCullough (Aston Martin performance director) shares praise to Lance for overcoming a difficult period:

“Lance, as far as how he works, is in and out of the factory between every event,” McCullough said. “He’s simulator running, he’s sitting with his engineers.”

He added: “He works so hard, and he’s so motivated to learn from one of the best drivers this sport has ever seen. And that’s what Fernando is.”

-

Overall Aston Martin are happy with the steps forward they took as a whole this year, and will work towards developing the car for next season and avoid making any repeated mistakes.

[baek-at-it-again95]

Walk The Plank (K.HJ x fem reader)

Chapter 2: Wooyoung’s Choice

You had grown up hearing tales about the infamous pirate crew ATEEZ—the fearless, power-hungry men that roamed the seas in search of the most valuable treasures they could lay their hands on. You almost didn't believe the stories your mother had told you as a child...not until you wound up on their ship

Warnings for this chapter: Mentions of weapons

A/N: Thank for you for the support!

Previous Chapter: The Man in the Black Fedora, Masterlist

Chapter 2: Wooyoung's Choice

"Alright wench, let's lay down a few rules for you."

"Stop. You'll scare her, Mingi."

"Yeosang, sometimes fear must be instilled in order for there to be compliance. We can not have any games here, savvy? For all you know, she could try to collect our bounties, given the chance."

"I-I suppose," the man you learned was named Yeosang says, his scruffy blond hair hiding his eyes. There are eight men that stand before you that you assume to be the original crew—the ones who started their search for treasures far and wide. The captain pushes his way past Mingi and his crew mates. 

"Settle down, would you?" He scolds, coming to your side. You feel overwhelmed by the presence of so many eyes upon you—much less the eyes of ATEEZ. "Y/N has made a deal with me and agreed to help us retrieve the Cromer. If you do any harm to her, you will become good mates with the sharks. Do I make myself clear?"

"Aye, Captain," they reply in unison.

"And if she does harm to us?" Mingi asks. Hongjoong looks over at you and gives you a wink before turning back to face his crew.

"Then she walks the plank." Your blood runs cold at his response, muscles tensing at the thought of such a horrid death. "But that will not be necessary, will it, Y/N?" The captain gives you a smile. In one swift motion, he pulls a blade from his pocket and cuts the rope that binds your wrists. You are immediately relieved of the discomfort and begin to examine the ugly marks the rope left behind. "Will it?" He repeats. You look up at him, ignoring the other sets of eyes on you. 

"No, Captain," you comply. 

"Good. Seonghwa, show our new crew mate to the quarters." 

"Yes, Captain." A tall man with his hair shaved at the sides quickly turns around, heading for the door. You keep your gaze on his polished black boots that fit his clean appearance as you follow him. You hadn't given it much thought until now that the pirates are oddly handsome—again something you would not expect. 

Seonghwa does not stop until he reaches the crew's quarters. He heads down, then turns and waits for you to follow. "This," he gestures to an abundance of hammocks, some lined with furs, wools, and other various items of comfort, "is where we stay." His sharp brows crease in thought. "However, as a woman, it might be more comfortable for you here."

Seonghwa brings you over to the farther side of the room to a sheet of fabric that serves as a curtain, covering two small beds. "This is sometimes where the men sleep if they are ill, but it might serve you well, as no one is at the moment." You nod as he speaks.

"Thank you, Seonghwa." He seems unsure how to respond, cheeks tinting a bit pink from what you assume is embarrassment.

"You are welcome, Miss."

"My name is Y/N," you remind him. 

"How do you know about the Cromer?" he asks curiously, heading up the steps to the upper deck. 

"Well, my father is very interested in obtaining artifacts of those sorts. I have walked into his studies countless times as a child and asked what he was doing. He would tell me tales of these artifacts and somewhere along the line, I became interested myself. Who does not want a taste of magic? It is something fascinating that I would love to see for myself," you explain.

"I admire that, Y/N."

"You are not what I imag—"

"SEONGHWA!" A man with big eyes and a strip of blonde hair comes running over. 

"Aye, San?"

"Can we show Y/N the guns? I have a feeling she would be a good shot." He grins.

"Not yet. Why don't you take her back to Hongjoong for now," Seonghwa suggests.

"Okay! Come on!" San heads for the captain's quarters that you had left only a few minutes before. He opens the door without knocking and bows, gesturing for you to go ahead. "After you, love." He smiles. 

"Thank you, San." You step into the cabin and he shuts the door behind you, the captain barely looking up from the papers on his desk to see who has entered. Taking slow steps, you come to observe the mess atop the table. Maps and illustrations are sprawled across its surface and markings of ink cross each other at every point. "Wow," you breathe out. He looks up at you and lets out a huff. 

"Not so great when you look at it for a long time. Frustrating beyond belief," he grunts, setting down his dividers and ink pen in defeat. As he runs his hands through his rugged hair, you pick up his quill, biting your lip in thought.

"Are these places you have already searched?" you ask, pointing at the scribbles on the map with your free hand.

"Yes."

"Impressive," you mumble. "These were not discovered on my father's maps. But have you considered the Cromer to be somewhere that has already been explored?" you question.

"I think we would have already caught wind of someone with such a powerful object if it fell into the hands of colonizers and commoners," Hongjoong explains.

"Well, in order for there to be any information on such an artifact, of course it has previously been discovered. Where it has been left is just theory. We could even be dealing with magic that protects it," you suggest.

He raises an eyebrow. "Continue."

"There is legend that suggests where it is. 'Where the horizon meets the waves, the illusion is created. The answer lies here not, but in the stars they reflect. The crescent waxes and wanes, but its mirror does not follow suit."

"We have followed the stars, to no avail." The captain sighs. "And the crescent it speaks of...we thought it was moon lake. We have been there countless times."

"So, the crescent the legend speaks of is not moon lake." 

"Yes, but...what do you reckon it be?" He looks up at you through his dark eyelashes. 

"The lake does not wax and wane, but you know what else does not? Promise island, off the course of the New World. The land is crescent shaped, and of course, it does not wax or wane," you finish, drawing an 'X' on the map near the coordinates of where you know the island to be. Hongjoong stands up, looking down to where you marked the map and back up at you in shock. 

"That...is remarkable. We have yet to venture to that side of the New World." He pushes himself up from the table and stomps out to the deck.

You follow over and press your ear to the now closed door, straining your ears to pick up words like "reroute" and "northeast." Hearing less and less, you wonder what is happening on the other side when someone comes back through the entrance. The door would have hit you, had you not been quick. Your innocent doe eyes do not fail you as you look at Hongjoong and pretend you were never listening. "We have changed course and it should take a few days to reach our destination. Y/N, you may take a rest now." You find yourself not-so thrilled to leave his quarters, the atmosphere almost comforting. The smell of paper and ink made you feel at home.

"Thank you, Captain." You fiddle with your fingers. "Do you have any books that detail your journeys?" you ask.

"Detail them?"

"Yes, I am sure you have come across many interesting things on your travels, have you not?"

"I suppose...no one has ever asked for them." He scans the bookshelf behind him and pulls out a book with a leather spine, handing it over to you. "Here is one. I hope it does not bore you." He smiles.

******

Here you are, enjoying the view from the crow's nest of ATEEZ's ship. Somehow, the air smells sweeter, despite it being the same. About three days ago, the ship had changed course to head northeast, towards the New World. 

You open the captain's book to the page you had left off on and continue reading. So far, you have read through his and his crews' adventure to Wonderland. A sketch of some of the land was drawn by Hongjoong on the next page in black ink that was ever-so smudged. You admire the small picture as you run your fingers over the textured paper. 

"Argghh!"

You flinch, startled by the unannounced visitor hanging onto the side of the crow's nest. Jung Wooyoung looks at you with sparkles in his eyes, like a child seeing their favorite toy. "Hey little treasure," he coos, a giggle slipping from his pretty lips. You had learned very quickly that he entertains himself by causing trouble amongst the crew. You set your book down to look at him.

"Hello, Wooyoung."

"What are you doin'? Did Captain force you to read?" he asks, peering at the book in your lap.

"No Wooyoung, I was simply curious about your previous journeys."

"Oh...well...have you read about me?" He grins from ear to ear.

"Yes! You were the one to discover treasure in the Wonderland, were you?" He nods with pride, climbing into the nest to sit next to you.

"What else does it say about me?" he asks excitedly.

"Here." You open the book back up, holding it between the two of you to read together. He scratches the back of his neck, looking at you and back down at the paper.

"I never learned to read," he says. 

"Oh." You frown, glancing down at your lap. "I...I can teach you if you want," you offer. His eyes glitter in delight once again.

"Yes! I want to learn!" He squirms around with excitement and quickly leans in to kiss your cheek. You bring your hand up to touch where he had left his thanks, your face warming up. 

"Ah, let us start with this word," you smile at him, pointing to the word 'Aurora'. "It seems a bit difficult, but I believe in you. This letter 'A' makes this sound," you explain, demonstrating the different pronunciations that belong to each letter for him. He repeats after you, filled with joy when you praise him for repeating correctly. When you get to the last vowel, you ask him to repeat the whole word by reading it.

"Aurora," he says with confidence. "Those are the pretty lights in the northern sky," he marvels. "Pretty, like you." His compliment makes your heart swell, and you can't help but find him so precious.

"Thank you, Woo."

"Y-"

"Ahoy!" Choi San interrupts, popping up on the side of Wooyoung.

"San!" He exclaims, "Y/N is teaching me to read!" San's eyes light up with similar wonder; they are very alike.

"Y/N, your turn to learn! I want to teach you to shoot!" San says, offering a hand for you to grab on to.

"I suppose that skill could be of use," you reply, taking his hand and climbing over onto the ladder. "Woo, will you join us?"

"I think I'll stay up here. Got to keep a lookout, aye?" 

"Alright." You wave and watch him glue his eyes back to the captain's book before you climb down after San.

>>>chapter 3

[hccn-overseer]

Issue 5, 5/17/2023 - The Overseer

Issue Masterpost About the Overseer

This week has shown the Hermitcitizen Hub settling into a rhythm, with an art compilation being created for the lovely ZombieCleo's birthday! Citizens are also encouraged to apply for mod, as more are welcomed! Please check announcements for more details. On to the news!

The Employment Guide to Season 9 and What to Put on Your Resume to Get The Job

By Winter

You may be wondering like I did a few months ago, “How do I get paid? Will I have anything to retire on?” The answer to all your financial questions will be answered by someone who did a little bit of digging to find the answer to the eternal question. So here is a step by step guide on what businesses will pay you. 

At Number One we have Az’s bakery. You help her bake, and just generally help out. The one caveat is that you cannot eat the batter. Under no circumstances. 

Coming in at Number Two we have Grian. Grian will pay you to work at any one of his many Un-Grianproof areas. You do have to be able to not be afraid of the dark, possibly perishing, and overall weirdness. You will be paid in life insurance and grian orbs.

Coming in at Number Three we have SUS. Scar Unsafe Services will pay you to mess with SSS, SUS pays you in whatever you can find in SSS’s chests. A quote from one of the members reads “We do not claim responsibility for anything that may happen if you choose this payment option”. They also pay in free mob farms. 

Coming in at Number Four on the opposite end of the spectrum you have SSS who will pay you handsomely. Yes I repeat, HANDSOMELY to light up very dangerous things. The pay rate will go up depending on the difficulty. 

Coming in at Number Five we have The Hermitcraft Recap. As a member of the recap filming team, the recap definitely pays you. You have the ability to live on sight and you are given 3 meals per day. If you are like me and don’t live in the recap housing units, then you get compensated in what you may ask, Health Insurance, and a diamond a month. 

Coming in at Number Six we have Beef’s TCG shop. You get paid in TCG cards and learn the skills necessary. That’s pretty much it. 

Coming in at Number Seven we have Impulse’s Mega Base. You will not be paid at IBuy. At the mega base you will be paid in the diamonds you dig up. You may also get some cool ores. 

Coming in at Number Eight we have Mumbo K(illsalot) Jumbo. As he is the richest hermit you will get paid, in what who knows. You get paid in diamonds, and A LOT of work holidays. Last this writer heard the Mumbo Affiliates went on a BIG biking holiday. 

And finally The Overseer. This writer can confirm….

…

…

THAT YOU DON’T GET PAID. 

In all honesty, I have been paid in the experience of a lifetime, and we also get baked goods so pretty nice. You also do get paid in fun times.

Now onto other news below the cut!

Weekly Weather Report

By Virtual

Note: If any of our readers are rich and generous, we ask for assistance in paying Rainy’s ransom. The kidnappers' identity is still unknown, but leaving a pile of diamonds on the doorstep of the Overseer offices may be enough to reach them.

Thursday - STORMS, hail expected between 3 PM and 5 PM (GMT). Helmets are suggested for all those working outdoors.

Friday - PARTLY CLOUDY, 75% chance of Doc messing with Grian and Scar. Citizens near Scarland and Grian’s rocks advised to watch for anvils and charged creepers.

Saturday - CLOUDY, fog expected around Zedaph’s base between 1 AM and 10 AM (GMT). Reduced visibility may obscure ledges, increasing risk of death by fall damage.

Sunday - RAINY, hordes of Drowned expected around Spawn Town. Watch for tridents from every direction.

Monday - SUNNY, high temperatures expected to reach 36 Celsius by 11 AM (GMT). Dry areas at risk of wildfires.

Tuesday - SUNNY, high heat continues. Citizens advised to carry water and watch for signs of heatstroke.

Wednesday - WINDY, elytra flight may become unsustainable at high altitudes.

Additional Notes: Increasingly strange copper structures expected to appear around Grian and Mumbo’s bases throughout the week. Citizens are to continue working around them as normal. Do not attempt to wax the copper.

Astrology Corner

[The Horrorscope Theme - Intro]

WINTER The Overseer Presents The Horrorscope Edition 5 [The Magnus Archives Theme – Intro - Continues]

WINTER Test… Test… Test… 1, 2, 3... Right.  (Sounds of Winter clearing her throat) My name is Winter. I work for the Horrorscope, Astral Library, an organizsation dedicated to academic research into the esoteric and the Paranormal. 

I work for the Horrorscope and have been asked by my superiors to record my thoughts on the coming week. I have been working at the Horrorscope for a few weeks and have not got to voice my thoughts so far. As of current we have ten cases still ongoing. 

Statement begins.

(Pause)

Our first case is of the star sign Gemini… While searching through the previous weeks records I noticed that star sign was advised to invest in (disgust) Etho Heads. While this may seem merely harmless, it seems foolhardy to invest in something that multiple people already have invested in. While Etho Heads may make great gifts for family members off server, this reporter suggests ridding yourself of these interesting collectables, if anything give a few to the Hermit known by ZombieCleo.

(Pause)

(Sound of Winter taking a breath)

Our second case is of the star sign Cancer. Cancer was suggested previously to fight GeminiTay. The same week an obituary was released of one of the Cancers. A suggestion for the Hermit Citizens under the star sign of cancer is to invest in life insurance. 

(Pause)

Our third case is of the star sign Leo. Leo is often associated with the symbolism of a lion and the colour red. According to one record, Leo was described as “Lucky” for this year. I doubt the likelihood of that occurring. To improve the chances of this happening, it is suggested to obtain a lion, and then set it free in a friend's house. 

(Pause)

Our fourth case is of the star sign Virgo… Virgo was advised previously to follow a Joe Hills certified beauty tutorial. While this was previously suggested, it is now suggested to spend time away from the entity, and other paranormal beings. 

(Pause)

(Sounds of the newsroom, brown noise if you will)

The crew seem up in arms about something, however that is not my business, my business is delivering this to the listener.

(Pause) 

Let’s get back to business. 

(Sounds of Winter taking a breath in and out)

In the case of Libra it has been written down that they should bring an umbrella with them and open the umbrella up in inconvenient moments. The rest of the suggestion is scribbled out, with some words, which are indistinguishable. 

(Sounds of Winter flipping through pages)

(Beat)

For Scorpio it seems as if they are suggested to start pooling diamonds?? together. So sorry for the confusion but I cannot understand for the life of me what is written here. 

(Sounds of Winter flipping through even more pages)

For Sagittarius it is suggested that they have-

(sounds of a wet being squelching up beside the recording device)

(Sounds of a thud before the sound of Winter slumping onto the ground)

(Static)

Editor's Note: This transcription was not written by the editor. Due to its disturbing nature, the editor would like to exclude it but it is above her pay grade (the pay grade being nothing at all). Sincerest apologies.

The Birdhouse

By Azure

Citizens may have taken notice of many avian and bird-adjacent persons flocking to a treehouse in the forest near the shopping district. One of our interviewers, Azure, has spoke with some of the avians who often use the birdhouse for more information on this new gathering area.

1. What is your favorite part of the bird house? Z: I'd say its how inviting everyone I've met here so far have been! Budgie: Similarly, I like the closeness of it. It doesn’t matter who you are or where you’re from, an avian is an avian Raven: Definitely [the living room], it so comfy and I may or may not have not left it in weeks except to necessities due to that 

2. Who built it? Z: I don't actually know that one, do you know who built it? Budgie: Well, when I got here, nobody really knew, either. It just kind of… existed. A lot of the accommodations and decorations you see were brought in after we settled. We’ve built crash-landing pads around the entrances, we’ve put ladders for those who can’t fly… I believe we changed some of the glass to stained glass so nobody would run into it. While it doesn’t change how I view the Birdhouse, I would certainly like to know who to thank for this building, it’s provided such a welcoming community Raven: No, not really. It's just kind of always been here.*

3. How did you find the bird house? Z: I just got here recently, and after getting a home set up i just- went looking for some community, and heard there was one for avians. I’m glad i looked into it Budgie: I was on my way home from working when I flew past it, I saw what looked like an avian-based build, so I got curious. I wanted to explore, but I didn’t know others were inside until I stumbled upon them. I believe it was Pen and Nerd I found… Raven: Oh, I was out flying a while back and it caught my eye. I went it to check it out and I haven't really left since than

4. Roughly how many citizens are living there and how big is the Birdhouse? Pen: None of us live here per se, at least I don't think so! We all just come around to hang with each other, this is a space to meet other Avians after all. The birdhouse is quite big, that's for sure, quite accommodating too. Can't tell you the exact amount of avians that come by, the amount varies everyday and I'm personally sure I haven't met them all yet Budgie: I’ve so far met… maybe 10 other avians? I’m not sure how many of us actually live here, but many of us will stay the night on occasion! We have a designated ‘comfort’ area for nests and other sleeping arrangements. Z: I’ve only met about 4 so far, 6 counting these two (referring to Pen and Eagle)

6. Is there anything else you'd like to mention about the Birdhouse? Eagle: Well it’s a very nice community space and we’ve kind of formed a flock here. I won’t name names, but some of us can be very bad at remembering to preen or have never learned how, so a lot of times another avian will offer them help. And the avians here are always welcoming, even if I haven’t quite met all of them yet. Budgie: The Birdhouse is always open— I don’t think there will be a time where anyone would be turned away, We’re a welcoming community. As I’ve said before, an avian is an avian. It doesn’t matter if they’ve got full wings or lost or damaged ‘em, they’ll always be welcome to settle in. Pen: I'd say that the Birdhouse is a great place for everyone, especially the birds, it's... I'd have to admit, it's very nice to have a place filled with others that can understand you, ya know? Still working things out and hopefully more things could be added for the others, like how the stairs are a recent addition for those that are grounded. Can't wait to see how this place grows honestly. Z: I've only really been here a very short while, but from what i've seen and heard from the others here, the birdhouse seems like a sort of safe space, and i'm just really glad i joined here

*Editor's Note: The Birdhouse was designed by Morph and built by Redfeather. Canonically, whoever built the basis of the Birdhouse is not definitively known but many other avians helped make the Birdhouse what it is today. You can find a tour of the Birdhouse here.

Lost and Found 

By Virtual

The following items were brought in from across the server this week. As nobody knows who they belong to, they have been categorized as lost. If you recognize any of the following, or would like to report a lost item, do reach out to us at lostandfound@thehermitnews.org*

*not a real email address

Item 1: An iron sword that has rusted up to the hilt, found buried in the desert. The sword was excavated by a citizen collecting sand for a mega project. Despite its poor condition, the sword appeared to have full durability and whistled when swung, as though it was extremely sharp. Tests have shown that the sword is exactly as sharp as it sounds, and it is now being kept safe in a leather scabbard in the Lost and Found office, where it has temporarily become a coat rack. If the sword belongs to you, we hope you are up to date on your tetanus shot before you come collect it.

Item 2: A book with a yellow cover, found in Welsknight’s base. Nearly imperceptible patterns weave their way through the fabric cover of this book. The pattern seems to have no beginning or end, and when we attempted to find one, we found the shapes repeated infinitely, like fractals. This cover appears to have been layered over an older leather binding, which peeked out when the book was opened. The inside cover did contain a bookplate, but the name of the library it came from was too smudged to make out. The book itself contained no words, only a series of impossible mazes that bled over onto each consecutive page, creating a hundred page long infinite spiraling puzzle. If this book belongs to you, perhaps you can show us the solution.

Item 3: An amulet in the shape of a stylized eye, found in the Overseer Offices. The sound of running tape spills from the amulet at a steady volume. When a citizen listened closely, they could hear a voice layered beneath the static. They reported an unmistakable feeling that, whoever this is, they are talking directly to the listener. Their words are faint and unintelligible, but their tone and repetition strikes a sense of urgency. They are trying to tell you something. Can you hear the whisper? Come to the Overseer offices, and listen closely. Maybe you can pass on the message.

Spectating Science: Ravagers and Environmental Behavior in Decked Out

Recorded by Cirrus, the Shoebill

Scientific studies of the Hermit Citizen Hub have been steadily developing over the course of the past month, allowing insight into subjects that have drawn both applied researchers and their fellow citizens towards a dedicated journey of curiosity. These growing developments include but are not limited to observing mob behavior, the radiation of The Perimeter, the transformative effects of The Rift, the fungal nature of the Sculk and its symptoms of infection, the possible existence of The Watchers and their relation to their citizens, and experiments related to the enigmatic Zedvancements.

This edition of Spectating Science focuses on the behavior and care of Ravagers, several of which are heavily integrated into the up-and-coming dungeon crawler game, Decked Out, and features an interview with its highly experienced laboratory technician and beast keeper, Redfeather.

Redfeather, a researcher who specializes in the fields of mob biology, health, and behavior, also keeps watch over a variety of experiments focused specifically on animals and has been working as an applied scientist for two seasons. After several months of assisting other prominent figures with their experiments, Redfeather conducts his own calculated routines of Ravager observation, care, and experimental study.

Ravagers play a vital role in Decked Out, as they are used to increase the game’s difficulty and instill a fearful sense of urgency in its participants. Originally herded by the creator of the dungeon, Tango Tek, these creatures are known to be aggressive towards players and notoriously bloodthirsty, making them a perfect addition to the intended pulse-pumping chases of Decked Out. Despite their brash demeanor, those who are persistent enough to study their instinctual reactions to an ever-changing internal environment have brought an intriguing perspective. 

The following interview with Redfeather was recorded on May 12th, at approximately 8:45 AM in The Birdhouse by Cirrus, the Shoebill.

“Good morning, Feather! Have a seat and tell us where your work hails from. How long have you been an applied scientist?”

“Well, I’m just a lab tech, I work odd jobs here and there, mostly taking care of experiments and other captive mobs, feeding them, recording any growth, monitoring health issues, and recording their behavior in studies! I’ve been working as a scientist for two seasons.”

“Please, elaborate on what makes you passionate about your work. Our listeners [and readers] and I are enamored with any enthusiasm.”

“I’m especially passionate about studying mob behavior. For example, the way Ravagers react in a controlled environment is fascinating!”

“Ravagers, such rambunctious creatures. Have you made any particularly notable discoveries about their behavioral changes, perhaps related to their environment, in this case, or their keepers?”

“Well, for example, their varied reactions can depend a lot on different variables! Depending on the keeper, their past experiences, how hungry they are, the space they’re in, temperature, the presence of other Ravagers, they can be wildly different in their levels of aggression! Sometimes they can seem downright cuddly! Of course, you must always still exercise caution with an unpredictable animal. Illagers may ride them, but they are far from tame.”

“Bulls of their own unruly destiny, they’re not to be tamed by those who dismiss their spirited minds. You say they can be quite affectionate, yes? What are the ideal conditions that could bring them into such a state?”

“I’ve yet to arrive at a precise conclusion, however, I can draw a pretty confident line between docility and whether you have food. Also, if they have recently quenched their bloodthirst, they seem to enjoy a bit of ‘celebration’ so to speak. Other Ravagers treat them with more respect for having won the hunt. Also, while not great for their general mood, a Ravager in a smaller space is less likely to attack right away, granting you the opportunity to distract it with food. Thus, why letting them out of the stable right at feeding time is the perfect time to sneak in pets. They also love a good brushing, providing you can get close enough.”

“Bloodlust for Ravagers, it can’t be removed any more easily than a decaying body seven feet into a bog, after all. A sociological development of a hierarchy among these creatures must be more intricate than those of mere slow cows and sheep if respect for victors is considered imperative to their moods. You have an observant instinct about you to notice such previously undiscovered details. Now, you’re also affectionate towards them from a domestic pet standpoint, just a smidge, from what you mention about brushing them. What is it about them that draws you in with such a sensitive approach?”

"Yes, well, I am one of the keepers as well and have taken on the job of making sure their health is well as they live in Decked Out. I have grown fond of them, though they, I think, feel less towards me and are fonder of the food I bring. Nevertheless, they enjoy their pets and brushes at least as much as a picky cat enjoys being pampered. And that prickliness is what draws me in, I suppose. It's lovable in a way to see them go after their prey so enthusiastically!"

“Cats, what an intriguing comparison. Chasing and devouring their prey gives them a common ground with many, I suppose Ravagers included. Being in such a controlled environment as this ‘Decked Out,’ I suspect, requires Ravagers to relearn their instinctual routines to freely roam. Did you and the keepers work to build a Pavlovian response to their controlled living quarters?”

“For right now, I can say that the Pavlovian response is clearly observed when bringing food, however, for their bloodlust, no additional training is needed! They will go after the keepers or testers or developers alike.”

“Listeners [and readers], take note. Feather, have you recorded any developing changes in the behavior of any other mobs?”

“The only other mobs in the dungeon are the Vex, and they are very instinctual, familiar with Ravagers, and are only let out on occasion when the runner is out of time.”

“Decked Out runners, your time is fleeting from the moment you enter, in that case. Now, if you were to attempt to socialize these controlled Ravagers with other mobs, do you think that they could co-exist in that same environment in Decked Out?”

“I believe other mobs would adapt quickly, given they don't have any natural hostilities aside from Villagers and Iron Golems.”

“Excellent for them! How about if they were to live among each other in the wild? Are they too far changed in this environment to readjust to living in the wild, say, if Decked Out does not last forever?”

“I'm unaware of any extant wild Ravagers aside from their cousins, the cows, but given their natural herding instinct, they would likely do just fine on the plains. The future of Decked Out after the game is currently quite uncertain, but I'm certain we could free the Ravagers at the end for some fun."

“The release of these capricious Ravagers will certainly receive quite the fanfare! […] Each and every second of your time in this interview is one I am grateful to have shared with you. Those are all of the questions I have for you at this time, though I have no doubt that another interview will come along your way in the future.”

“Pleasure to have you! Yes, I can't help but invite you back when you please, not for work, but as a fellow avian! This place is both for the community as well as for avians to be themselves. Have a good day!”

Spectating Science would like to thank Redfeather for providing such a detailed perspective on the idiosyncrasies of these bull-like creatures! We invite any applied researchers to bring forth any growing developments that they would like to share in this segment and look for Cirrus, the Shoebill, for an interview about themselves and their work. In addition, tangents and rambles are more than welcome. No discovery is too small, and it is never too late to teach your fellow citizens something new!

[If you would like to be interviewed for Spectating Science, please look for Cirrus’s Citizen I.D. Card in the Discord server and leave a note for them.]

ADVERTISEMENTS

By Jamie

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The most magi-cal place on the server is opening soon! In just a few days, the Calnival will be opening in the south side of the shopping district. Opening night will have half-off ticalets and exclusive acts! All members of the Calition will be present for the show of a lifetime. Staff positions are open.

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To honour Mi Amore, the Garden Club is hosting a meeting at Bdubs’ new Horse Mountain. Guests are expected to bring Pink Carnations, Marigolds, Roses, or Rosemary in his honour. Hopefully things go down less explosively than the last time Bdubs’ pasture was used.

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Have you accidentaly created a mob farm in your empty interior? Don’t worry! The Scar Safety Services is happy to come in, clean it up, and light up your base! While we can’t help build your base, we can ensure that you won’t die trying! :)

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Fun and Games

This week's fun and games are brought to you by Roo, Snuffy, and Azure!

Word Search by Roo

Crossword by Roo

Coloring page by Snuffy

Brain Teasers by Azure

And that’s all for this issue folks! Thank you so much for reading, and have a wonderful week!

[purposelynana]

What Did I Watch: #32

This week, what? Been drowning in work and Eid. But I'm back.

Step By Step was a nightmare and it was fucking good. Nightmare is such an understatement. It was thorough portrayal on being a corporate slave. That's why I called it nightmare. And a blessing.

For the longest we'd been served by half-assed representation about office workers. Before Step By Step, there was A Boss and A Babe, and I swear to God I should know from the title alone, this would be a complete trash. And also Bed Friend, where definitely the focus wasn't on the office. Too bad. I know the sex scene was the talk of the town, but well lemme emphasize once more, if you want to watch porn, just watch porn, instead of pushing porn onto contemporary show. Or at least if you take out the porn, it still makes a decent story.

Yet Step By Step is different. It was scary because how similar it was to my office life. I had this unsettling feeling while watching it. I don't think it was bad per se, but definitely that was something I don't want to repeat. Yes, this is written by someone who has been in the office, worked in the office and maybe get abused in the office. And for the love of God, thank you for its depiction of office love story that it's believable. Love in the office does happen very slowly, delicate (dude it'll involve HR at some point it has to be delicate), and full of understanding.

Such a good watch.

Skam-fication of Korean BL.

The Eight Sense is why we need Evak-coded characters grace our screen. The moment Jihyun and Jaewon met is a constant reminder that to me Skam will always be the greatest queer media out there. Because it was true to themselves. And heck, I don't think anything will ever get close to it, until now. Wow.

There was no necessary side couple. Weird filler. Every scene has its purposes and actually push the narrative. The characters did develop. Great cinematography and directing. Phenomenal acting by rookies??? And I had the loudest sigh after finishing it. Thank God for your mercy.

I got shredded in pieces, then stitched bit by bit, and the wound healed in the most pleasant way. I lived by angsty stories and beautiful resolve. From time to time, I wonder when will we get a story that it's just beautifully heartbreaking and still giving a sense of hope at the end of its run. Maybe it will take so many years and a great deal of trial and error until finally we're going to come across something like this.

And finally on a whim, I decided to watch La Pluie. No idea why. Perhaps because the color palette on it seemed soft. Or the idea of having to listen to your soulmate on the rain sounded too whack but somehow I was convinced of the world building that had been going on in the back. Plus, this little pulp never wasted any moment and I appreciate that. There are plots going on in the times when BL just having only vibes without substantial context.

My only beef for now, is the sound. The background sound was too loud, sometimes buried the surrounding sound that supposed to come out. Such as when they talked on the side of the road, I barely couldn't hear any cars or as simple as other people talks. It lessen the believability of this world.

Yet, it's still a good recommendation. Up till now it doesn't make my blood boil for having some stupidity shit that no one couldn't explain. Fingers crossed it could land smoothly. Well somehow it makes me think why I couldn't accept Oxygen but I could embrace this. Big question indeed.

There will be rants coming shortly....

I promised myself to watch Our Skyy then naaah. I kept thinking about the way GMM does things. I've never seen an entertainment agency that bad of handling the misbehavior of their actors. The very obvious way that the only thing they care is just making more money from shitty fan services and merchandises. To make more money from parasocial relationship that they build over time. I don't care if in real life the actors actually close or not. We suppose to don't care in the first place. It's their privacy, in which should not be trading commodities. It's fucked up. Our Skyy is a trading commodity. Well, it has always been trading commodities. But at least don't make that obvious. Dolls, blanket, snacks, it's not fucking smooth at all. I'm bothered. It's not helping the narrative. The narrative is already over. It is a walking ads. That's for sure. You're fucked when the dolls is the one taking over the discussion rather than the story. But well, these days who cares right? People need money, not some substantial storytelling. Not every production house can act like HBO right?

[aidynnjongno]

❤️🗑️🔮

❤️Is your muse in a relationship right now? If they are, how is it going? How did they get together? How long have they been together? If not, do they want to be in one? Do they have a crush, or any interest in finding romance? Have they ever been in a relationship? For both, what are their relationship hopes for the future?

tw: mentions of pedophilia & abuse

aidynn is not in a relationship, nor has he been in one for about 7 or 8 years now. he's only ever been in one, and it was quite toxic and inappropriate. the girl he dated was twenty when they began dating while he was only fourteen, and they were together for six straight years. she ruined any minor hope aidynn had of what love could look like, and that it was possible. the girl ruined him in many more ways than that as well.

now that aidynn is twenty-seven, turning twenty-eight this year, there is a part of him that thinks about giving romance a fair chance, not just hooking up with pretty guys and gals and not committing to anything. while the thought pops in his mind briefly, he never gives it any true consideration or puts any effort towards it. long-term he isn't sure what he wants, but companionship would be cool.

🗑️What is your muses greatest failure so far in their life? How did it affect them? Who knows about it? What, if anything, do they do to prevent repeating it? Have they been able to move past it, or do they linger on it?

tw: substance abuse & overdose

his greatest failures surround his long history with drug use. he overdosed twice as a teenager and tried more than once to get clean but failed many times. aidynn tries to remind himself that healing isn't linear and it's okay to make mistakes, but he wonders that if he was stronger would he have been able to get cleaner much earlier? he got there eventually in his twenties but it was still many years and hardships that weren't necessary.

🔮what does your muse want their future to look like? what are their hopes and dreams? do they talk about them openly, or not? are they taking steps to achieve the things they want? are they aware of all the things they want?

aidynn doesn't consider the future often. there was a long period of time he didn't consider the fact that he could live to see his twenties, let along anything beyond that. now he has reached those goals that were previously unattainable, and he's just going with the flow. he was able to get clean, and he owns a tattoo shop with his sister. that was pretty big for him. he hopes his sobriety and and the shop continue on well. he doesn't talk about his hopes or dreams a lot however, if ever. he's just hoping it all works out somehow.

[alielahi]

Your Guide to Buy a Car in Dubai | From Showrooms to the Open Road

Dubai, famous for its luxury living and shining skyline, attracts more than eight million international tourists who tend to prefer higher-end cars. Choosing to drive in Dubai entails many different factors that one must keep in mind when planning to buy a new car in order to secure a purchase that will truly meet your needs. Whether it’s casually walking into the showrooms or stepping on the back seat of a supercar, here is the very thing that you must know to Buy a Car in Dubai.

Understanding the Dubai Car Market

Luxury Cars

Dubai's car market has always been a symbol of luxury and luxury is reflected in it. There as flattering tighter ones, as curvy sedans and top-shelf supercars everywhere. You will be sure to find just the right model to suit your particular tastes.

Popular Brands

High-end features hold the main part of luxurious cars such as Rolls-Royce, Bentley, and Lamborghini. Similarly, a further difference is in having a low-cost option. Factories of the best-known brands, such as Toyota, Nissan, and Honda, create reliable high-volume vehicles for different target groups.

Choosing the Right Car for You

Budget Considerations

Before venturing into the Buy a Car in Dubai adventure, it is worthwhile to work out a budget. Account not only for the initial price but also for maintenance, insurance, and fuel which require extra spending.

Fuel Efficiency

Rarely ever can a driver anticipate the fuel price fluctuations in the region. Hence, it is a significant element to inculcate into the car decision-making process. Picking a car that would give you more miles per gallon of fuel may be a wise decision if you want to save money in the long run.

Features and Options

Whether it is the most important features or the unavoidable ones, set your priorities and decide what matters to you the most. Identify the vehicles you like considering your pros and cons. This includes repeated life-saving, entertainment, and interior furnishings technology.

Researching Dealerships and Showrooms

Online Resources

Begin your shopping to Buy a Car in Dubai by looking at various online platforms and websites selling vehicles by local dealers. You can just as well go the traditional way and survey their stocks, compare prices, and get first-hand information from other client feedback.

Visiting Showrooms

Having made the first cut in the number of cars you could be interested in, it will be advisable for you to pay the showrooms personal visits for a deeper comparison. It`s better to spend more time and inquire with someone knowledgeable, check out different models you are interested in, and even drive these cars to feel their performance.

Navigating the Buying Process

Negotiating Prices

Don't get discouraged if you can talk with the dealer to come down to a price that you are comfortable with. Research the retail price of the car you’re interested in and make sure you have the intention to not buy it if you’re not quoted the right price.

Understanding Documentation

Clarify and confirm what would be required documentation in the buying process. Organization of Transport, Vehicle Registration, Insurance Policies, and any necessary paperwork should be done.

Financing Options

Bank Loans

With that in mind, many banks in the city of Dubai will let their potential car buyers possess car loans with an affordable interest rate and different repayment periods. From shopping various banks compare and check a financing option suitable for you.

Dealer Financing

Some dealers provide customers with a credit line from the finance company at the time of purchase. Some others let customers apply for the credit line themselves. Conveniently, this may seem good in the initial time but should be aware of the terms and conditions before you commit to such a debt.

Inspection and Test Drive

Mechanical Inspection

Conduct the car assessment with a good mechanic prior to making the final decision. They can bring out any problems including those which will take a bit before being seen.

Test Driving

Do a test drive and check for the way the car steers, how well it absorbs shocks, and its efficiency in general. While practicing, try to pay increased attention to acceleration, braking, and the tactility of the vehicle.

Finalizing the Purchase

Payment Procedures

The last step is to have a car purchase with the dealer after which you choose what will be the best payment option. You must add registration, insurance, and all other fees as well as extras you may see as optional to the bill amount.

Registration and Insurance

Fill out the relevant documents for car registration and insurance required. File and pay the fees to an appropriate role.

Driving in Dubai

Traffic Rules and Regulations

Get acquainted with Dubai traffic regulations as well as other road signs before driving on the roads of this city. This encompasses such factors as following speed limits both on the road and off it, also observing lane discipline, and following parking directions as well.

Tips for Driving Safely

Be attentive to defensive driving practics and constantly be careful on the road. Being conscious of other drivers, pedestrians, and possible dangers will permit you to drive safely. Therefore, keep a safe distance when passing another vehicle and never fall into distracted driving.

Maintenance and Servicing

Scheduled Maintenance

The task which makes such a huge difference when it comes to your car longevity is routine maintenance. Follow maintenance-recommended manufacturer and manage any immediate problems.

Finding Reliable Service Centers

Prefer established service facilities for regular service and repair works. From us, you can get an example of a humanized sentence. Use our writing assistant to quickly and correctly process your text. Make sure that you only deal with certified auto-mechanics and ones who are experts in your car brand.

Exploring Insurance Options

Types of Coverage

Dubai provides warranty options ranging from first-party, third-party, and extensive coverage for car insurance. Analyze your required needs and take a suitable plan that meets the appropriate protection.

Choosing the Right Policy

By taking into consideration various factors such as coverage limits, deductibles, and benefits, you can opt for an insurance most suitable for you. Scan the market by asking several providers to get different quotes and choose the one that offers you the most competitive rates.

Resale Value and Depreciation

Factors Affecting Resale Value

The age and the legality can be the factors that affect the resale value of your car along with its condition, its popularity in the market or the possible existence of a recall.

Strategies for Maximizing Resale Value

Maintain your car regularly. Keep detailed service records. It can be wise to consider the color and also the type of package when buying with the goal of maximizing the resale value.

Adapting to Dubai's Climate and Terrain

Extreme Weather Precautions

Drivers in Dubai are often tormented by the local hot and dry conditions that can wreak havoc on their cars’ appearance and condition. Utilize sun shades, keep your car at shaded areas that are not sunny high to avoid the risk of sun from having an irrevocable effect on your vehicle's upholstery.

Off-road Adventures

Got stuck? How about you consider buying a 4WD vehicle for exploring Dubai's rough off-road trails. Make sure to be careful with all safety rules and always obey the trail signs.

Conclusion

When you Buy a Car in Dubai it can be really fulfilling as long as you take your time and use your brain cells wisely to make wise choices. The auto buying guide entails everything from A to Z, which will make the process of buying a car easy for you. Such involves selecting an appropriate vehicle, negotiating its purchase and more. This is but the first side of the Vegas coin.

FAQs

Q1: Is it expensive to buy a car in Dubai?

Ans: The cost of purchasing a car in Dubai can vary depending on factors such as brand, model, and features. While luxury cars may come with a higher price tag, there are also affordable options available in the market.

Q2: Do I need a UAE driver's license to buy a car in Dubai?

Ans: While it's not mandatory to have a UAE driver's license to purchase a car, you'll need one to legally drive it on the roads. Make sure to obtain the necessary documentation before taking ownership of the vehicle.

Q3: Can I negotiate the price when buying a car in Dubai?

Ans: Yes, negotiating the price is common practice when purchasing a car in Dubai. Take the time to research the market value of the vehicle and don't hesitate to negotiate with the dealer to get the best deal.

Q4: What financing options are available for buying a car in Dubai?

Ans: Banks in Dubai offer car loans with competitive interest rates and flexible repayment terms. Additionally, some dealerships may provide financing options directly to customers. Compare offers to find the best financing solution for your needs.

Q5: How do I ensure my safety while driving in Dubai?

Ans: Practice defensive driving. Obey traffic rules. Remain vigilant on the road. Avoid distractions. Keep a safe following distance. Use turn signals to signal intentions to other drivers. Reference

[kariachi]

Who wants an Osmosian gambling game combining luck and memory skills? Too bad because you’re getting one.

Due to rather obvious ‘matter absorption and manipulation powers’-related issues, dice games aren’t all that popular in Osmosian cultures, and you’re more likely to see card games, which are a little harder to fuck with though still not impossible. We’re not going to be discussing those right now though, instead, we’re going to get a brief rundown of How To Play ‘Hegae’s Roots’ (or ‘Hidden Ceiling’, depending on where you are).

You Will Need

One (1) large-ish box with a lid

One (1) small box with a lid

Between fourteen (14) and twenty-eight (28) twisted-together masses of wire or attached lengths of chain with various numbers of ‘roots’ (preferably in odd numbers) small enough to fit easily into the small box

3+ other players

How to Play

Gather players in a circle (players may leave but not join a game already in progress)

Lay the ‘root balls’ out for perusal by the players, allowing everyone time to get a good look at what they’re working with

Place all the root balls and the small box inside the larger box and shut the lid

Determine who will be the ‘weeder’ (or ‘clearer’, depending on where you are) by the method of your choice

The weeder will then reach into the larger box and blindly place one of the root balls in the small box, shutting the lid and placing it in front of themselves

All other players will guess how many roots the chosen root ball has and place a bet in the center of the circle (the bet isn’t technically necessary, but common, much like you can technically play poker for just bragging rights) (players may not skip rounds, you either place a bet and make a guess or you leave the game)

Once all guesses have been made and bets placed, the root ball is revealed and the betting pool given to the individual(s) who guessed the right number (or closest number, or closest number without going over/under, depending on the rules you play by)

Set revealed root ball aside

The position of weeder then moves to the player next to the prior weeder, moving in an east-to-west cycle

Repeat steps 5-8 until all root balls have been removed from the larger box

For more betting fun: If the root balls come in multiple colors/materials, a second betting pile can be made for the colors/materials of the chosen root ball, to be managed the same as the first

At first the game is solely a matter of luck and odds, but as it goes on ones memory comes further and further into play, sort’ve like counting cards it’s expected that you’ll attempt to keep track of how many roots each root ball has at the start and which ones have been removed over time, making all guesses more accurate. There’s also a level of strategy involved in when you bet, what you bet, and when you leave the game: as the number of possible root balls drops, the bets get larger, but so do the odds that you’ll have to split the pile with one or more of the other players. So, if the game is gambly, you have to strategize to get the best payout. And even then, luck and your memory can be the deciding factors in whether you win or lose.

And with this you now have the basics of how to play ‘Hegae’s Roots’. Feel free to go out now and challenge and probably lose to any Osmosians that may be in your life.

[btssavedmylifeblr]

Void - Part 7 (M)

title banner by @rude–jude♡

Genre: Sci-fi with a little angst and a LOT of smut

Pairing: BTS x Reader (yup - all seven)

Summary: You are the only female crew member on a 12 year space mission with seven handsome men. The sexual tension is real, y’all.

Word Count: 10.9k

Part 7 / ?

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6

Warnings: explicit sexual content, alcohol masturbation, voyeurism, more non-monogamy

The men at the table stare at you, dumb-founded. Jungkook’s mouth hangs open. Hoseok hides his mouth behind his hand; his eyes are wide with shock. Jimin spins around, trying to gauge the others’ reactions. Namjoon leans back in his chair, face unreadable, his chin resting on his hand as he looks from you to your powerpoint. Jin laughs uncomfortably then clears his throat and silence falls again.

Yoongi speaks first. “You put sources on your powerpoint about how we should all start fucking?”  

“It’s important to cite your sources,” you mutter, shuffling your feet.

Taehyung sits up straighter on his cot. “Are you saying we should start fucking you or each other?”

“Well, the bonobos do both. They are fully bisexual. Almost all aggressive contests are settled by sex. Even when two males squabble over a female, they often resolve it by rubbing their genitals together.”

“What?” Hoseok injects. “You want us to start rubbing our genitals together?” His cheeks blush.

“No, no, no.” You shake your head. “I meant you all should have sex with me.” Your own cheeks heat up as you say it. “I can’t control what you do with other people. In an ideal world, it would be both. But it seemed best to start with me.”

Jungkook mouths the words “start with” to himself, still staring at the table.

“But like, how would that work logistically?” Taehyung asks.

“Well, there are seven of you, so that could be like one per day. Take a week off for my period.”

Jimin splutters, whirling to face Yoongi. “Did you put her up to this?”

Yoongi shakes his head, frowning.

“No one put me up to this!” you argue. “This is what I think is best for the mission.”

An explosion of opinions pours out of all the men at once. Hoseok is swearing under his breath. Taehyung is trying to get Jimin’s attention, but Jimin is arguing with Yoongi. Jungkook wants to know how you decide who goes first. Jin says something to Namjoon that you can’t hear.

“So, um…” You struggle to regain command of the room over the chatter. “My period starts tomorrow, so take a few days to think about it.”

“Officer.” Namjoon’s deep voice cuts over everyone else and the conversation at the table ceases. “You and I need to speak privately. Now.”

The commander stands up from the table and gestures toward the door. The rest of the crew looks back and forth between the two of you wearing expressions of shock and confusion.

You avoid their gazes as you follow Namjoon’s direction out into the hallway. He steps out after you, closing the door behind him. A flurry of chatter resumes after the door shuts, but it’s too muffled to hear what the rest of the crew are saying. You and Namjoon stare at each other.

“So…” you say, shifting your weight between your feet.

“Let’s talk in my office,” he says, squeezing past you and moving in the direction of the sleep pods.

You examine him from behind as you follow him to his office, trying to gauge what he’s thinking. Are his shoulders tense? Is he angry with you? Are you about to be scolded?

His office is also his bedroom. And you did just offer to fuck him, no strings attached. But of all your crew, Namjoon is the one that you have the most strictly professional relationship with. His walls are almost as impenetrable as yours. But he is a man, right? And men like sex, right? It would have been more awkward to not include him. This wasn’t about personal feelings. It was about the mission. And you were all in the mission together.

________

Sweat pools at the base of your spine under the hot studio lights. A reporter drums her long red nails on her clipboard as the sound technician adjusts the microphones between interviews.

Press junkets are your least favorite part of the job, made all the worse by your mission director insisting you all dress in full launch gear, despite the launch still being two weeks away.

“This is the last one.” Namjoon turns around from his front and center seat to whisper to the rest of the crew.

Yoongi groans, rubbing his face with his hands. “Why do we have so many of them when they all ask the same questions?”

The eight of you have been trapped in this room all day as a parade of different reporters trail in and ask the same inane questions.

This new reporter opens with a softball. “How’s the food?”

“Good!” Namjoon patiently answers this question for the third time today. “The ICSE has recruited the top food scientists to figure out which foods hold their flavor and nutrition best in long term storage. And our chief botanist here is going to keep us well stocked with fruits and vegetables. Right, officer?” He gestures for you to chime in.

“Yup!” You are grateful to Namjoon for pitching you a question that isn’t about you being the only woman in a crew full of men. You’ve already had to explain how periods in space work twice today (short answer: pretty much the same way they work on Earth). “We have lettuce, tomatoes, cucumbers, peas, bean, soy, carrots, cabbage, chilis, potatoes, lemons, oranges and strawberries, plus a bunch of fresh herbs. They even found a way for us to grow mushrooms out of our culinary compost.”

The reporter makes a disgusted face at the idea of compost mushrooms and pivots to a new line of questioning. “What will you miss most about home?”

“Why don’t we go around the group?” Namjoon prompts. Even your commander seems to be fading in enthusiasm by this point. “I’m going to miss long walks in the fresh air, and my family, of course.”

Most of the crew answers with some variation of friends and family. Yoongi will miss his brother’s cooking. Taehyung will miss his dog who is going to live with his parents. Jungkook will miss long showers and his mom.

“What’s one personal item you’re taking with you?” she asks.

Namjoon is bringing a Chinese elm bonsai tree that he calls his tiny friend. Hoseok is bringing a stuffed Earth plushie given to him by his niece. Jin is bringing vodka.

The reporter narrows her eyes at the mention of alcohol and leans forward. “So what do you do if you feel a crew member’s judgement has been compromised?”

“We have protocols in place,” Namjoon answers. “Tests of cognitive impairment and such. We’re also coached in what we call “expeditionary behaviors” which are key to maintaining peace and cooperation on board.

Yoongi chimes in. “The key to solving all disputes is our ability to be honest with each other. When there is a problem, we sit down as a group and discuss it.”

“Our readers are saying what a tragedy it is that we are shipping seven of our most eligible bachelors off to space for a decade.” She laughs. “Any broken hearts being left here on Earth?”

“Oh!” Namjoon draws back and looks unsuredly at the rest of the group. This was not a question he was expecting to be asked today. “Umm…” he laughs nervously.

“My mom is devastated!” Jin cracks from the back row and the rest of the crew laughs in relief.

But the reporter doesn’t want to let go of this idea so quickly, so she turns to you. “Well, you must certainly enjoy having such handsome crew members.”

“Uh…” To your complete mortification, you actually blush in response. You clench your fist to try to get a grip. To your right, Hoseok’s hand flinches, as if he can feel the need to hold you back. “I’m going on this mission to find life on other planets.” You grit your teeth. “My only interest in my crew is whether or not they do their jobs.”

The woman shakes her head, laughing. “Doesn’t hurt that they look good doing it.”

_______

Namjoon opens the door to his office and gestures for you to enter. The number of papers on his desk seems to have multiplied, which theoretically shouldn’t be possible.

“I’m going to say three words to you,” Namjoon says as he closes the door behind him. “And then I need you to repeat them back to me: banana, river, finger.”

“Namjoon,” you cross your arms. “I’m not cognitively impaired right now.”

He mirrors your closed stance. “Please repeat the words.”

You sigh. “Banana, river, finger.”

He pulls a piece of paper from his desk and wipes it clean, before handing it to you, along with a pen. “I need you to draw a clock face.”

“Seriously?”

“Set it to quarter past eight.”

“This isn’t necessary, commander,” you grumble as you take the pen and paper, drawing a rudimentary clock face and setting the hands to 8:15. “See?” You hand the paper back to him and he inspects it.

He nods, rubbing his chin. “Repeat the three words again.”

“Banana, river, finger.” You put your hands on your hips. “You think my judgement is compromised?”

Namjoon sighs. “Everything seems to be in order. You must admit, your behavior recently has been uncharacteristic to say the least. Are you sure everything is okay?”

“Well, no, everything is not okay, that’s why I’m doing this.”

He leans against his desk, looking you up and down. “I fail to see how fraternizing with the entire crew will improve things.”

The back of your neck heats up in embarrassment, but you press on. You need the commander to be onboard with your plan.

“You admit we have a morale problem, right?”

He nods. “Hard to suggest otherwise. What with all the recent events.”

“Okay, so I was going through the principles of expeditionary behavior last night as I figured out what to do. Principle One:  Communication - talk so you are clearly understood, talk about intentions before taking action, share information freely.”

“I know the principles.” Namjoon interrupts.

“But don’t you see? That’s why I had to call the meeting. Why I had to get everything out in the open, share information freely.”

“That explains why you needed to inform the crew of your relationship with Jimin. It doesn’t explain why you think it would be good to involve everyone.”

“Principle Two: Self-care - manage psychological and physiological health, balance work, rest, and personal time, be proactive to stay healthy and mitigate stress.”

Namjoon arches an eyebrow. “A lack of sex doesn’t damage your health.”

“With all due respect commander, I think it does.”

“There are outlets to relieve sexual urges other than exploiting our only female crew member.”

“Well, they were all trading porn with each other. That’s how this whole thing started.” Namjoon purses his lips in thought. That seems to be new information to your commander. You continue your argument. “Principle Three: Team-care - monitor team for signs of stress and fatigue - which we have a multitude of, cooperate rather than compete, encourage participation in team activities.”

“Are you considering this a team activity?”

“Well, yes. Like the bonobos do.”

Namjoon shakes his head. “Let me speak so I am clearly understood. I can’t prevent you or the rest of the crew from doing what you want to do with your personal time. But I can’t participate in it either. I’m the commanding officer on this ship. It’s inappropriate. We can’t have an equitable relationship.”

“That’s why it’s not a relationship though, it’s just sex. And if everyone involved is consenting...”

He rubs the back of his neck. “Let’s be honest about intent for a minute. Is that really what you want? You want all seven of us?”

“Umm…” Your stomach churns as you are unable to admit that, yes, that is what you want. “I think it’s best for the mission.”

“Part of principle three is to volunteer for unpleasant tasks if they benefit the team. Are you sure that’s not what you’re doing right now, officer?”

“Yes, I’m sure.” Though embarrassing to admit, boning your attractive colleagues is not an unpleasant task in the slightest.

“You should also consider the fact that whatever forms do get signed will have to be sent back to mission control. And may get out to the press.”

“I thought HR decisions were confidential.”

“Juicy stories have a tendency to find their way out. Especially when they distract from failed missions that added years on to our trip.”

“I understand, commander. Information must be shared freely. I still think this plan is necessary if we’re going to complete this mission successfully.”

“Okay.” Namjoon sighs, dropping his hands to his sides. “It would seem there is no talking you out of it.”

“No, sir. I intend to implement with full commitment.”

The two of you stare at each other for a minute. An immovable object and an unstoppable force.

“So… should I go?”

“Yes, you’re dismissed.”

________

After the press junket is mercifully over, Hoseok catches you in the hallway.

“Hey, you coming to Tae and Jimin’s quarantine party tonight?” Tonight is the last night you all are allowed to see other people before you enter your two-week quarantine prior to launch. “Seems like you could use a drink.”

“I don’t know,”  you sigh, leaning against the wall.

“What’s on your mind?” He leans next to you.

“That last reporter, she got in my head.” You rub your forehead.

Hoseok rubs the back of his neck. His jawline tenses as he mulls over what to say.

Hoseok is so handsome. And smart. And newly single. He broke up with his girlfriend a couple of weeks ago before signing the final mission papers. And now he was going to be the one of only seven people in your whole world.

In another life, you would want to date him. You’d be dying to go to a party with him and plot how to get him alone for part of the evening. In another life, you would have fallen in love with him. But in this life, he’d been dating someone else for the whole time you’ve known him. And you have a mission.

What’s most grating is that the gossip columnist isn’t wrong. You’d be hard pressed to find a better set of men anywhere on Earth than the seven you were leaving with. They were all attractive, smart, kind, disciplined, athletic young men. It would be much easier to be entirely professional if you had a crew of balding middle-aged men.

“Do you think it's a mistake? Me going on this mission?” you finally ask.

“What?” Hoseok gasps. “No! Why would you think that?”

“The mission director said it was supposed to be only men. That mixed gender crews are too complicated.”

“Have we ever done anything to make you feel like we don’t view you as a professional?”

“No, no, of course not.” Other than being ridiculously good-looking.

Hoseok’s fingers twiddle nervously. “And we won’t. We’re a team. You’re our colleague. This mission is so much bigger than any one of us. And you’re the best candidate for this position.”

“I’m the only candidate.”

Hoseok smiles. “Well, that’s exactly my point. We’d be lost without our biologist. Besides, you were better than all the male candidates even before they dropped out.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Oh yes, I do. Are you forgetting how badly you kicked my ass all over organic chemistry? And I was the chem major! It was such a disgrace.” You both laugh.

You smile at the memory: early morning study sessions, Hoseok bringing you coffee in exchange for your homework help.

“Come on,” he insists. “I know you. You can’t not go. You’re going to be the first woman on Europa. It’s been your destiny since college. Don’t you want to see it with us?”

Yes, you wanted to see it so badly. You picture the two of you looking out over the icy surface together.

“Come tonight.” Hoseok insists. “It’ll be fine, you’ll see. We won’t mess this up for you.”

“Thank you, Hoseok.”

_______

You leave Namjoon’s bedroom and climb into your own sleep pod, the question of what mission control or the press know about what’s happening on this ship weighing on your mind.

Unfortunately, googling it for yourself won’t work. It takes between 10 and 20 minutes for a single signal to get from your ship to Earth, depending on exactly where you both are in your orbits. Then it takes another 10-20 minutes to return. Usually if you wanted to research something, you’d submit a formal request to your research assistants back on Earth,  who would gather a collection of relevant documents for you and send you a bundle of them all at once. But asking your research assistants to assemble a dossier on your rumored sex life was out of the question. You need someone you can trust.

You pull out your laptop and compose the following email.

Hi Dianna,

How are you doing? I’m sorry I’ve been slow to respond to your messages lately, things have been a bit messy out here. I was wondering if I could ask you a favor. Are there rumors about my personal life going around the ICSE? Or in the press? I was wondering if you’d be willing to run a quick google search and let me know what you find.

Thank you! I hope you and Melissa are doing well.

Dianna should have been on this mission with you. You wish you could talk to her in person. You’ll have to send her a video message when you have more time. But you are interrupted in your thoughts by a knock on the door.

“Who is it?”

“Jimin.”

You hit send on the email and open the door.

“Can we talk?” he asks.

You nod and stand to one side to allow him into your pod.

He sighs and rubs the back of his neck. “So I’m confused.” He runs a hand through his hair as he steps into the pod. “Last night you were mad at me for suggesting you date Taehyung. You said you wouldn’t be passed around between crew members. But now you want to have sex with the entire crew?”

“I’m not being passed around. This is my plan. I’m in control.”

He shakes his head. “The end results seem to be the same though. I don’t understand.”

“This way we don’t have to pretend this is something it’s not. It can just be sex, just release. We don’t have to pretend it means anything more than that.”

“But it means something to me.” Jimin frowns. “I have feelings for you.”

You sigh. “They’re not real though. It’s hormones and boredom. It’s just because I’m the only woman here.”

“No it’s not!”

“Yes it is! You didn’t feel this way about me on Earth, right?”

Jimin stammers for a minute. “People can change. Relationships can change.”

“Jungkook and Taehyung didn’t have feelings for me on Earth either and now that they’ve seen me naked they’re suddenly 'in love' with me. That’s not real. That’s just biology. We’re just apes in space with too much time on our hands.”

“Jungkook’s in love with you too?”

“I don’t know. He thinks he is.”

Jimin frowns, but seems less sure of himself. “Is this because I suggested sharing? Cause that was a dumb idea and I take it back.”

“No! You were right. It’s what’s best for the mission.”

“So what? It’s like this or nothing? I have to share you to have any of you?”

You don’t answer him. Currently, no one else has actually signed, so Jimin might get you all to himself anyways.

“Am I… am I not enough?” Jimin asks. “I can be more. I can do better. I can do whatever Yoongi does that you like so much.”

“This isn’t about Yoongi. It’s about the mission.”

“You said you liked me. You said you wanted to be with me. Was that just about the mission?”

“It’s not about what I want.”

“Yeah, yeah… it's about the mission.”  

He turns to go, but you catch his hand in yours. His thumb rubs across the back of your hand. All the men are just as touch-starved as you are. It’s probably unfair that you are playing to that now.

You see an idea flash across his face right before he scoops you up into his arms, kissing you passionately. “I’m going to show you,” he whispers between kisses. “I’m going to show it's real. I’m going to be what you need. My feelings are real.”

Then he places you back down and leaves. You lean against the door breathless.

________

Mistake number one: You should not have challenged Jin to beer pong.

Mistake number two: You should not have said goodbye to your parents and dog right before going to a party full of strangers and booze.

Mistake number three: You should not have gone to find Hoseok when you are this drunk and he smells that good.

You collapse onto the couch beside Hoseok, too tired to stand up anymore. Hoseok smiles to see you, face flushed red.

“Hoseok,” you whisper, even though he’s already looking at you. “Hoseok, I have something important to tell you.”

He leans in closer. “Yeah?”

“Europa’s oceans are ninety-six kilometers deep.”

He laughs. “Of course, I know that! I wrote my graduate thesis on Europa’s oceans!”

“Yeah, but like…” You wave your hand. “That’s like soooo deep. Like not intuitive, you know? Like that’s ten times deeper than any ocean on Earth. I can’t even conceive of how deep our oceans are, let alone Europa’s.”

You scoot closer to him on the couch. “That’s like…” You pull out your phone to do some basic math. “That’s like 120 Burj Khalifas!!”

Hoseok nods. “Yes… It is super deep.”

“Stacked on top of each other!” You slap your knee in emphasis.

“Yes, I know!” He laughs again.

You sigh. “Can I tell you a secret?” You lean in closer and put a hand on his thigh. He leans in too. “There just has to be life down there. I know there has to be.”

“I hope so.” He rests his hand on yours.

“We’re going to find it together, you and I.” You grab his hand and squeeze it.

Hoseok looks down at your joined hands and you worry that maybe you’ve gone too far. Maybe tomorrow this will be an awkward and embarrassing moment. But right now it feels nice. His hand is warm. You wonder if it would be too much to lean your head on his shoulder.

But then Hoseok’s phone buzzes in his lap. His ex-girlfriend’s name flashes across the screen and you drop his hand.

“Sorry,” he mutters, getting up off the couch. “I should take this.” He leaves and the couch next you is colder.

“Hey!” Jin stumbles over to your seating area. “Have any of you guys seen Namjoon?”

“I think he went to meet that girl he won’t tell us about,” Yoongi answers from a chair a few feet away. When did Yoongi get here?

“So everyone is getting laid tonight, huh?” Jin laughs.

“Not everyone,” Yoongi mutters, nursing his beer.

“Don’t be such a grump, Yoongi. It’s basically our last night on Earth! Take advantage!” Jin laughs before wandering back into the crowd.

“I’m not getting laid tonight either!” You yell across the room at Yoongi. More direct than you would be when sober.

He cracks the first smile you’ve seen from him in days, raising his beer into the air in a little clinking motion. You do the same with your plastic cup full of what Jimin had described as “Tae’s jungle juice”. It was red and smelled like tequila.

“Why aren’t you getting laid?” you ask, taking a swig of the juice for courage.

“Got dumped, not really over it yet,” he answers matter-of-factly. “What about you?”

You shrug. “The only men here are about to be my only companions for the next twelve years. Seems like a bad plan to fuck them.”

Yoongi laughs. “Suppose so.”

“Well, don’t you worry. If that reporter is right, we’ll all be having space orgies in a month anyways.”

Yoongi chokes on his beer. “Shit.” Beer dribbles down his chin as he laughs. “I think we need to find you some ice water and a cab.”

“Probably a good plan,” you mutter as you lie down on the couch and close your eyes.

________

When you wake up in the morning, there are still no signed HR forms in your messages. Had you been a fool to think any of them were interested? How much time does it take to decide such a thing? Perhaps by putting the idea out there explicitly, it had lost all of its taboo appeal.

There are two other things waiting for you to notice though: your period and a calendar reminder that today is chili pepper pollinating day. After dealing with the first of those problems in the bathroom, you head for the lab to find Hoseok.

You find the science officer in the lab as always, sitting with his knee tucked up against his chest.

“Hey, um…” You shuffle your feet. Want to fuck me? No wait…

He blinks at you, bleary-eyed.

“Oh, you don’t look good. Were you here all night?” you ask.

“Um, was I? Yeah. I suppose. Lost track of time.” He rubs his eyes, before looking you up and down, then casting his gaze back to the floor.

All you want to do is ask about the forms. Or the meeting. Or what he thinks of you now. But you don’t.

“I need to pollinate the chili peppers today.” Usually Hoseok is the person who assists with that. “But I can get one of the other guys to do it if you need the sleep.”

“No!” Hoseok lurches forward, standing up a bit too rapidly and needing to put his hand back on the bench to steady himself. “I mean, I’m fine.”

You should disagree with him. He is exhausted. But you’d like more time to talk to him.

Pollinating the chili peppers is both time-sensitive and time-consuming, hence why it took two of you to get the job done. There were no insects on your ship to do the job for you and if the plants didn’t get pollinated, they wouldn’t bear any fruit. Chili peppers were your favorite crop. Not only a vital source of Vitamin C, but all your food benefitted from having a bit of spice added to it.

You and Hoseok head for the greenhouse together. The initial set-up gives you something to talk about in the beginning. Hoseok gathers the pollen from one flower onto a paintbrush, then hands it over to you to paint onto the stigmas of each little flower on the next plant.

Slowly the conversation dries up as you fall into a silent rhythm. Other than enjoying the chili peppers, this was also one of your favorite tasks on the ship because of the high likelihood that the two of you would brush hands periodically. It always gave you butterflies. But today he seems extra intent on keeping his distance from you. Was he disgusted by you now? His hands are trembling.

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

His hand twitches so hard that a little rain of yellow pollen cascades onto the floor. He curses in frustration before turning to face you. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

"I’m fine. Why wouldn’t I be?”

“This, um, plan of yours…” he gestures to the vague tension in the air. “It doesn’t feel like you.”

“I’m trying to save the mission. That has always been my top priority.”

“Yeah, I’m still not clear on how this benefits the mission.”

“I outlined it all in my presentation. Plus Yoongi said…” you start to say, but are cut off by Hoseok's derisive snort.

“Look, if you’re in love with Yoongi, go date him, okay? Don’t feel obligated to include the rest of us out of pity.”

You frown. “I’m not… I’m not in love with him. It’s just sex. Just biology.”

“This isn’t you!” Hoseok argues back. “You hated the idea of anyone ever treating you that way. And now you want all of us to… to… use you like that?”  He splutters out the end of the sentence.

“No one is using me! This is my plan!”

He sighs. “Well, I can’t be a part of it. Excuse me.” He leaves you alone in the greenhouse.

Your lower lip trembles and you bite it to stop it. He’s disgusted by you. Yoongi was wrong; Hoseok doesn’t want you. It takes you the rest of the day to finish the pollinating on your own.

_____

There are no forms waiting for you when you wake up the next morning either. Perhaps this was a mistake after all. If the men aren’t looking for release in the same way you are, then there’s no point to any of this. Even Jimin has been keeping his distance, so all you’ve done is mess up the one relationship you did have and offend your commander and colleagues.

Your tablet buzzes with a notification. It’s a reply from Dianna.

It’s great to hear from you! I hope things aren’t too crazy up there. I haven’t heard any rumors at work, but I’ve not been directly involved with your mission. We’ve started the plans for Titan and it’s taking most of my focus. I can ask around though if you want me to. I was surprised to find this article when I googled. Is this accurate? I assumed you would have said something.

Hope you are well! Melissa and I are going to send you a video of our new puppy.

Dianna

There is a pdf of a magazine article attached to the email entitled “Love Amongst the Stars”. At the top is one of the official launch photos of the whole crew that has been zoomed and cropped so that it’s only you and Jimin sitting next to each other. The tagline reads “How two astronauts had to leave Earth to find each other”. It makes you cringe so hard you have to put the tablet down for a minute before you can read on.

It’s some sort of fluff piece about a secret affair between you and the mission specialist. You scan the article, trying to figure out what they know. “A source close to the couple spoke with us...” Who is their source? You haven’t told anyone on Earth about what's going on with Jimin.

“Coworkers said they always sensed a special connection between the two…” This is nonsense. Jimin is one of the crew members you knew the least about prior to launch.

“Other crew members are very supportive…” Uh, sure.

“Maybe we’ll even get our first space wedding…” You groan out loud, closing the pdf.

Maybe that seals it then. You’ll just be space-married to Jimin for the next 12 years and that will be that. The idea makes you feel a bit claustrophobic in your tiny sleep pod, so you throw on your exercise clothes and head for the gym to try to clear your head.

_____

What you call “the gym” is actually just a bunch of resistance bands and cardio equipment stashed into the walls of one corner of the hangar. When the gravity was off, you had a variety of different choices for which equipment to use. There was a treadmill in the ceiling and an elliptical in the wall so multiple people could use the equipment in your off hours. But with the gravity on, the stationary bike on the floor is your only option.

As you begin your warm-up on the bike, you mull over your next move. Why hadn’t any of the other men come and talked to you yet? Jungkook had confessed to you, why wasn’t he signing up now? And Yoongi? Yoongi said he wanted a form only a few days ago. Why did it feel so different now?

Were you stupid? Had you embarrassed yourself in front of your entire crew for no reason? Maybe Namjoon and Hoseok were right and this was a bad plan. You pedal faster, trying to burn out some of the tension in your lungs.

The radio buzzes and Taehyung’s deep voice sounds in your in-ear. “Looking for a location for our biologist.”

“I’m in the gym,” you radio back, pausing your bike ride to catch your breath.

Moments later, Taehyung pokes his head in the door of the hangar. It’s good to see him up and about, even if his arm is still in a sling.

“Hey.” He steps into the room, adjusting his hair with his one good hand. “I need to talk to you about this, um, ape sex thing.”

Oh my gosh, is it finally happening? Maybe Jimin was right. Maybe Taehyung is more interested in you than you had realized. He fishes into his pocket and pulls out his tablet. You wish you weren’t so sweaty and gross for this conversation. Taehyung is such an intimidatingly attractive man.

Taehyung opens up the tablet and flips to the form as he walks closer to you. It’s happening. He’s going to sign the form. Shit. Then what will you do? It’s one thing to say you want to have sex with your whole crew, but what if he’s hoping to go right now? You need a shower.

Taehyung has nice hands. Long strong fingers delicately navigate the touch screen. It seems totally improbable that a man this attractive would be into you, even if you were the only woman in the universe. It adds to your suspicions that hormones are driving everyone crazy. Perhaps if you slept with him once, he’d lose all interest.

He finds the form and then turns his gaze up to you, staring you down with those eyes. It’s a good thing  Taehyung rarely turns his full gaze on you, because it is almost too much to bear. Shit, is he going to sign it? Is he waiting for you to give him some sort of signal?

“You can’t do this to Jimin,” he says.

“What?” Not what you were expecting. “Do what to Jimin?”

“This.” He gestures over the HR form. “Signing these forms with everyone. Having sex with everyone. You’re going to destroy Jimin.”

“Jimin’s the one who suggested this whole thing in the first place.” It’s a lie. You know it's a lie. Or at least a gross exaggeration. But Jimin was the one who first brought up the idea of sharing. All for the benefit of the man in front of you now.

“No way.” Taehyung scoffs, crossing his arms and raising an eyebrow. “No way was it Jimin’s idea that you sleep with the whole crew.”

“Well…” You can’t bear his gaze anymore and look down at the floor. “He wanted me to sleep with you.”

“What?” He puts down the tablet. “Why would he want that?”

“He, um…” You rub your arm. “He thinks you’re in love with me.”

“What?” There is only surprise on Taehyung’s face. It’s actually a relief to see that Taehyung is as shocked by that idea as you were. “Why does he think that?”

“I don’t know…” You feel kind of dumb now. Of course, Taehyung doesn’t feel that way about you. Look at him. “Cause you told him you were jealous. Cause you can’t stand to be in the same room as us.”

Taehyung bites his lip. “Oh, um, shit, sorry, that’s not what I meant.”

“What did you mean?” you ask. If Taehyung wasn’t jealous of Jimin, then...“Who are you jealous of?”

“Nevermind…” Taehyung stumbles backward, putting his tablet back in his pocket. “Forget I said anything.”

“No wait,” you get up off the bike to chase after him, catching by the sleeve. As he turns around, you make a show of turning off your microphone. He does the same. “Are you jealous of me?” you ask. “Do you like Jimin?”

Taehyung’s eyes widen and he bites his lip. He glances toward the camera in the corner of the room, then stands up and begins unzipping his jumpsuit.

“Um…” You are distracted by the golden arms that peak from either side of the tank top as the zipper reaches his groin. “What are you doing?”

“Need something to block the camera.”

“We have towels,” you mutter.  But now he’s attempting to peel the tank top up over his head.

“Yeah, but this way anyone watching will think we’re having sex.” He answers. “Shit, can you give me a hand?” In his attempts to remove his shirt, he seems to have forgotten he is wearing the arm sling and is now stuck with his shirt over his head. His injured shoulder is black and blue from his accident with the ROV.

You gingerly try to disentangle him without getting too close to his warm, bare skin. You succeed in freeing him from his shirt and he tosses it up and over the camera.

“You want them to think we’re having sex?” you ask.

“Don’t you? It plays right into your whole ‘save the mission with bonobo sex’ plan.” He zips his jumpsuit back up as he turns around.

“I suppose.” Though the plan was also supposed to be that there would be no more secrets between the crew. “What plan of yours does it play into?”

“The one where Jimin doesn’t realize I’m in love with him.”

Of course, Taehyung is in love with Jimin. That makes so much more sense. They’ve been so close for so long. And Taehyung has always paid very close attention to anything going on with Jimin. “You’ve never tried to tell him?”

Taehyung laughs wryly and shakes his head. “How would that conversation go? Hey man, I know we’ve known each other for years and I’ve already seen you naked and that you just think of me as a friend, but I’m in love with you. I know that’s awkward but now you have to spend the next twelve years with me, knowing that I’m attracted to you when you don’t feel the same way.” Taehyung sighs. “Doesn’t sound like a good plan to me. If he doesn’t feel the same way, I’ve ruined the friendship for nothing and then I don’t even have that.”

“Yeah… I get that.”  There’s something touching about realizing that Taehyung has been fighting the same battle as you for the last two years.

“I couldn’t tell anyone before launch because what if they wouldn’t let me go then? You know?”

“Yeah, the director wasn’t big on sending anyone who might ‘complicate’ the mission.” The two of you share a sad knowing smile.

“Yeah… And I thought it would be fine, you know? I like women too. I’d just date women until launch and no one would know. I wasn’t planning on falling in love with my roommate.”

“I don’t think any of us knew what this would be like.”

“I knew it was going to be a problem. I should have pulled out…” he continues.

Your mind flashes back to your own moment of doubt when Hoseok talked you into still coming on the mission.

Taehyung sighs and leans against the ice drill. “But I couldn’t just let him go off into space without me. Even if he’d never feel the same way, at least he’d still be in my life.”

The emotion in Taehyung’s words makes your eyes begin to mist. “You really love him.”

“Yeah,” Taehyung sighs again. “But he’s in love with you.”

“Well, he thinks he is.”

“What does that mean?”

“He only feels that way about me cause he thinks I’m the only option.”  Maybe he would feel differently if he knew about Taehyung’s feelings.

Taehyung frowns and shakes his head. “You don’t give him enough credit.”

“Oh come on, you know him. How many women did he date while we were in training?”

“A few…”

“And how many of them was he in love with before he found the next one?”  

Taehyung purses his lips. He can’t argue with that. “So why are you with him then, if you don’t think it’s real?”

You shrug, rubbing your arm. “I like him. Lord knows he’s attractive. And he wants me. It’s nice to feel wanted, I guess.”

“You could have that with any man on this ship though...”

You scoff. “They’re all suffering the same delusion. It’s only-available-vagina syndrome. I just want us all to fuck and get it out in the open. Maybe if we could get it out of our system, they would see I’m nothing special. And then we can get back to the mission.”

Taehyung eyes you up and down. “You don’t give yourself enough credit either.”

You shrug. “You wait and see. Jimin will get bored of me. They all will.”

Taehyung pulls his tablet back out of his pocket. “Do you really think that if everyone just like, banged it out, that it would help morale?”

“Well, it certainly couldn’t get any worse.”

“And Jimin thinks I’m in love with you?” He reopens the HR form and stares at it.

You nod.

“What if I signed this? And we let him think that for a little longer? Just until I figure out how to tell him the truth?

“Like we’d pretend the two of us are involved?” Maybe that would help you get the other men on board with your plan.

Taehyung nods. “Would that be okay?”

“Yeah, that would work.”

Taehyung smiles and signs the bottom of the form, then sends it to you. “Thank you,” he says before he leaves you to resume your workout.

______

Other than Taehyung, no one else approaches you over the next few days. If anything, the crew seems to be treating you more professionally than they did before you announced your plan to fuck them all. You have signed forms from Jimin and Taehyung and have been rejected by Namjoon and Hoseok, but you’ve heard nothing either way from the other three. What are they waiting for?

By the time you reach the end of the Monday morning weekly meeting, you’ve had enough waiting.

Namjoon finishes his debrief of the week’s goals and claps his hands. “Anyone have anything else mission related we need to discuss?”

“My period is over,” you announce to your assembled crew.

A muscle pulses in Namjoon’s jaw. “Officer, I wouldn’t consider that mission-related.”

You cross your arms and lean back in your chair. “Just freely sharing information.”

“Already?” Jungkook asks. “I thought you said it would take a week.”

“No, finished this morning. It varies a bit from cycle to cycle.” you answer. Hoseok’s leg begins aggressively bouncing up and down next to you, but you press on. “I need to make a schedule. So I need to know who’s in and who’s out.”

“Ooh, what if you shared out your tracker info so we’re all on the same page.” Taehyung enthuses.

Yoongi scoffs. “Why don’t we just add it to our mission task list then?”

“I’m not clear on why menstruating means we can’t have sex,” Jimin interjects.

“Enough!” Namjoon regains everyone’s attention. “We need clear boundaries between what is personal and what is professional. Right now, you all have jobs to do. Dismissed.”

________

By the time you finish your chores for the day, you have convinced yourself that getting the rest of the team on board is essential to your successful completion of the mission. So you go in search of Yoongi.

You find him in his workshop. Pieces of an air filter are spread out on the workbench and he’s in the middle of cleaning it. You had forgotten that is the actual purpose of the workbench. So much for climbing on top of it and seducing him that way.

He looks up when you enter and you decide to cut to the chase. “I haven’t gotten your HR form yet.”

“Yeah…” He goes back to inspecting the clogged tube in front of him.

“You said you wanted to sign one with me.”

“I did say that, yes.”

“And now you don’t?” You thought if anyone was going to be supportive of the plan, it would be Yoongi.

He sets down the part he had been inspecting. “Have you really thought this through?”

“Yes!” You put your hands on your hips. “I made a whole powerpoint! With sources!!”

“I think it's a bad plan.” He picks up another long tube full of dust and threads a brush through it.

“I thought you’d be onboard with this plan. You said if I was fucking everyone, there’s no need for jealousy.”

“Yeah, well, I was wrong.” He sets the tube down and turns around to look at you directly. “ Is that really what you want?”

Why is he questioning you now? He was the one who put this whole idea in your head. He was the one who knew all your fantasies. “But you said…"

“I know what I said.” He begins pacing back and forth in front of the workbench. “But there’s a difference between a fantasy and a reality. You really want to have sex with a different man every day for 12 years on some kind of rotating daily schedule? Like how we water the crops?”

“You’re mad there’s a schedule?” You try to come closer to him, but he backs away from you, turning back to the air filter.

“Sexual desire doesn’t run on a clock, you know,” he says as he starts to pack up the equipment. “What if you’re not feeling it that day? What if they’re not?”

“I’m just trying to be fair to everyone.”

“But nobody actually gets what they want!” He throws his hands up in exasperation.

“And what do you want, Yoongi?”

He pauses, then deflates, dropping his hands to his sides. “Nevermind, forget about it.” He grabs a wet wipe off the shelf and begins cleaning the dust of his hands, not looking at you.

“No!” He’s the one who has been egging you on this whole time. “You were the one who was all ‘you have to fuck Jimin to save the mission’. You said you didn’t care if I fucked Jimin too. What do you want from me, Min Yoongi?”

“I’m going to go get some dinner.” He mutters, throwing the dirty wipe in the trash and turning to leave.

Oh no. He’s not going to escape you that easily. You need some straight answers. “You started all this, Yoongi! You said every man on this ship wanted to fuck me and none of them do! What was that?” You follow him down the hall toward the kitchen.

He stops and turns around in the middle of the hall. “This isn’t all on me! You made choices too!”

“Because of what I thought you wanted!” you yell back. “What is your deal? First you want me to fuck you, then you dont. Then you want me to fuck everyone and then you don’t. What do you want from me?” Your voice is echoing down the hallway but you are way past caring about it.

Yoongi opens and closes his mouth, then spins back around and heads for the kitchen, with you trailing behind him.

Jungkook is sitting at the kitchen table with a bowl of ramen. He looks up, startled as the two of you barge in.

“And what about you?” You fire the question at your youngest crew member. “Don’t you want to fuck me?”

The poor boy nearly chokes on his noodles. “I, um…” He swallows, wide eyes glancing between you and Yoongi.

You lean against the table next to Jungkook as Yoongi steps around the two of you to head for the pantry, but you see his fist clench as he walks by. You lean closer to Jungkook. “Didn’t you enjoy my video? Don’t you want to see the real thing?”

“Uh...” Jungkook glances at Yoongi again. “Maybe the two of you should talk this out…”

Yoongi’s hands tremble, but he doesn’t turn around, intent on starting the rice cooker. You turn your focus to Jungkook instead. “This isn’t about him. Whatever the flight engineer wants to do is up to him. He knows where I stand. This is about you and I.”  You are going to get a man on this ship to fuck you. Today.

“It’s not like I’m not interested…” Jungkook’s knee bounces up and down rapidly as he watches you. “But I told you I was in love with you and you literally had a panic attack.”

Oh right. That was back when you thought you still had a shot of stopping all this. Before half your crew had seen you naked. Before all of them had heard you having sex. Before you’d announced that you wanted all of them to fuck you. But you can still control this, if you can get them onboard with your plan.

Your tablet buzzes in your pocket. You pull it out to give yourself a moment to think. There’s a message from Jin.

Hey, come find me when you get this and we can talk. I’ll be in the kitchen.

You brace yourself for yet another rejection note. But you click on the attachment to instead find your HR form, Kim Seokjin’s signature scrawled right next to yours.

Holy shit. He signed it. Under no false pretenses. What do you do now?

“What is it?” Jungkook asks.  

But then Jin appears in the doorway. He startles when he sees you. “Oh! I thought you’d still be on shift.”

You shake your head. “You signed the form.”

“What? He did?” Jungkook asks.

“Oh, um, yeah,” Jin answers, laughing nervously. “That’s what you wanted right?”

“Yes, that’s what I wanted.” You stand up and move closer to your pilot. Jungkook crosses his arms. Yoongi finally turns around to observe the three of you.

Jin. Jin with his broad-shoulders and plump lips. Your friend. Your very handsome friend. He’s going to help you save the mission.

“You’re the first one I’ve gotten, so you can go first.”

“Wait, what?” Jin stammers. “But you and the commander?”

You shake your head. “He didn’t sign.”

“You and Taehyung though? I saw him take off his shirt and then cover the camera.”

“Oh right… sorry… I guess you’re the second one. But Tae’s still on shift.”

“Don’t forget about Jimin.” Yoongi helpfully chimes in.

Jin takes a step backward. “But I thought for sure these two…” He gestures at the other two men in the kitchen.

“Nope,” you move toward him. “Not yet.” You suddenly see a way to get them all on board at once.

“Oh, well, um...” His ears are bright red. “Maybe we can talk more about this after dinner?”

“That’s one option…” You lick your lips and find the top of your zipper with your hand, blushing as the next part of your plan unfolds in your mind. “Or you could fuck me now.”

“What?”

“Holy shit.” Jungkook mutters beside you.

Jin dives around you, moving toward the other side of the kitchen. “There are people eating here!”

“Nothing they haven’t seen before.” You begin unzipping your jumpsuit in what you hope is a seductive manner, rolling your hips as you follow him across the kitchen. You have both Jungkook and Yoongi’s rapt attention.

You take a cue from Taehyung and peel off your tank top, throwing it over the camera behind you, leaving you in a bra and the bottom half of your jumpsuit. “Though if these two are going to stay and watch, they better sign the forms as well.”

“Stay and watch?” Jin swallows, hands clenched at his sides.

You grab the waist of your jumpsuit, teasing it down just slightly as you make direct eye contact with Jungkook and then Yoongi. “What do you think boys? In or out?”

Jungkook lunges for his tablet. A satisfying ping on your own tablet confirms that this plan is working. Yoongi just crosses his arms and leans back against the counter.

You drop the jumpsuit, leaving you in nothing but your bra and underwear. You prop yourself up on the kitchen table next to Jungkook’s now cold bowl of ramen.

“What are you doing?” Jin asks, whole face beginning to turn red.

“Look…” You shimmy out of your bra straps so that your bra is only held in place by your hand. “I’m going to need you to fuck me right here on this table, Kim Seokjin. For the good of the mission.”

“Why does putting your bare ass on the surface where we eat help the mission?!”

“No more secrets. No more jealousy. Everything will be out in the open. Like the bonobos do.”

Your fingers tease at the clasp of your bra. All three men stare at you. You lock eyes with Yoongi, daring him to look away. Implement with full commitment. You drop your bra to the floor.

“Stop, stop!” Jin moves toward you as you slide your fingers into the band of your underwear. “Just hang on for one second.” He picks up your jumpsuit from the floor and comes closer, draping it around your shoulders in an attempt to cover you. “Look at me.” He grasps your chin and turns your gaze to meet his. “Are you sure that’s what you want?”

You lick your lips. “Yes.”

He kisses you, hard. It’s aggressive, urgent even. His hands are on your shoulders, then sliding down your back, pulling you toward him. Your eyes close as you momentarily lose yourself in it. Despite you begging him for it, it still surprises you how insistent he is. His hands keep sliding down your back, until they reach your buttocks, running over the thin cotton of your underwear and scooping you into his arms. You wrap your arms around his shoulders for balance, and then he is lifting off the table.

He breaks out of the kiss to pick you up even higher and then proceeds to throw you over his shoulder.

“Jin! What are you doing?” You kick your feet into the air.

“I am a man, not an ape,” he says, picking up your jumpsuit and bra and tossing them over his other shoulder.  “And if I’m going to fuck you, it’s going to be in the privacy of my own sleep pod, where the only man enjoying it is me.”

He hauls you ass first out into the hallway, with Jungkook and Yoongi both watching wide-eyed as you are carried away.

“I can walk,” you argue as Jin turns for the sleep pods.

“Nope,” replies Jin, readjusting you on his shoulder before carrying you down the hall.

As you reach the junction to the bridge, your ass runs into something warm and firm.

“What the-” says Namjoon. Your whole body flushes hot as you realize you’ve run butt-first into your commanding officer.

“Shit, sorry commander.” Jin laughs. “Excuse us,” Jin says and continues down the hallway, not setting you down or stopping.

Namjoon has pressed himself up against the wall with his hands in the air, a look of shock on his face. He looks like he is about to say something, but then Jin reaches his sleep pod and sets you down inside and you can’t see the commander anymore.

“Well, that was the best thing that has happened in a long time.” Jin chuckles as he closes the door. “The looks on Namjoon’s and Jungkook’s faces will power me for a year. You okay?” he asks, handing your bra and jumpsuit. “For the record, I’m not expecting anything else to happen here.”

“You don’t want to do anything else?” You hold up your jumpsuit to cover yourself, more disappointed than you would like to admit.

Jin eyes you up and down. “I mean… I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t interested, but that wasn’t my intention in bringing you here.”

“You hauled me half-naked to your bedroom and your intention wasn’t to have sex?”

“I know, I am such a gentleman, aren’t I?” He laughs, then shrugs. “Seemed like maybe you needed an out. Things were getting kind of crazy back there.”

“But you signed the form? Doesn’t that imply a sexual relationship?”

“I guess I’m not really a ‘sex in front of two other men before we’ve even been on a date’ kind of guy.”

“How about a ‘sex in the sleep pods’ kind of guy?”

“Are you even actually interested in me?” Jin asks, getting more serious. “Because none of what happened in the kitchen felt like it was about me. I don’t want to be some pawn in your plot to make Yoongi jealous.”

“It’s not about Yoongi!” You groan. “Why does everyone think this is about Yoongi?”

“Have you seen the two of you interact recently? There are some seriously repressed feelings going on there.”

You bang your head into the door of the sleep pod in frustration, before looking up at him. “You’re a very attractive man. Maybe I have feelings for you?”

He sighs. “Yeah, but you don’t. You can’t swap us out for each other.”

Shit. The way you’ve been treating the men is exactly how you feared they would treat you. While you fear being wanted because you’re the only woman, you’ve made all the men on the ship feel as though you think them interchangeable simply because they’re men.

“It never occurred to me that any of you would have real feelings for me.”

“Well, you are very dumb.”

“Hey…” You hit him gently on the chest. He catches your hand in his.

“Amazing they would trust such a crucial mission to someone who is so very stupid,” he teases, still holding your hand.

“I’m not this stupid about mission related stuff, just all this relationship crap.” You laugh softly.

“So tragic. Someone with so much training ought to have better sense.”

He squeezes your hand and you look into his eyes again. He smiles a soft reassuring smile and for the first time in weeks, you feel like maybe everything will be okay again at some point in the future.

“You’re a good man, Kim Seokjin.”

“Best man on the ship.” He chuckles.

“Kiss me again.”

He arches his eyebrows. “Why?”

“Because I want you to.”

“Are you sure?”

“Look there’s no one else here right? This is only about you. I want you.”

He kisses you again, tenderly this time. His warm arms wrap around and you realize you’re still naked except for your underwear. You curl into his embrace. He smells good, warm and manly, like good cologne. You run your hands over his muscular shoulders that you can feel through his clothes. It’s slow and leisurely, like you’re savoring each other.

“You sure you’re not a ‘sex in the sleep pods’ kind of guy?” You tease as you slide your thigh in between his legs and feel his erection pressing against you.

He groans, resting his head on your shoulder as you grind against him. “I’d like to think of myself as more of a ‘sex in the sleep pods after the third date’ kind of guy.”

You pause and look up at him surprised. “You want to go on a date?”

He nods. “At least three of them, in fact.”

You smile. “That would be nice. I’d like that.”

He kisses you behind your ear. “So are Mondays my day then? Can I take you on a date next Monday?”

You gasp as he rolls his hips against you, the heat of him seeping through his clothes. “That’s a long time to wait, especially if you’re going to make me wait through three of them.”

“I’m sure we can find other ways to entertain ourselves.” He cups your naked breast in his hand, massaging gently.

“Is there anything in particular you want to do today?” You palm his erection through his pants and he gasps.

“Stop that, you temptress…” He grits his teeth. “I’m trying to be a gentleman.”

“Aww, come on, there must be something I can do for you.”

“Well…” He bites his lip. “I will admit that I am awfully curious what was on that video that got five of my crew members suspended.”

“I could show you.” You start to shimmy down your underwear. “But there was no touching in the video.”

He kisses you one last time on the cheek, before pulling away and pressing himself into the opposite wall of the sleep pod. “Okay, show me. I’ll be good.” He puts his hands up by his head in mock innocence.

You finish removing your underwear, spreading your legs apart as best you can. You trail a hand down between your legs, finding yourself wet already. “It was me masturbating.” You tease around your clit without touching it directly.

He groans, hips kicking forward as he stays up against the wall. “Show me.”

“Well, first I took my fingers and sucked on them.” You narrate your actions as you wet your fingers. “Then I touched my nipples.” Your nipples harden before you’ve even touched them, but you continue to tease them for his benefit.

His eyes dart back and forth between your face, your breasts, and your spread legs, as if he can’t decide where he wants to look first. He licks his lips like a man starving. “Keep going.”

“I’m very wet.” You continue your narration as he clenches his fists. You run your fingers through your wet folds, then hold them up to show him. His hips buck again as he groans, still fully dressed and pressed to the wall. “And then I touched my clitoris.” It’s your turn to moan as you finally touch your swollen pleasure center, stroking slowly and keeping your eyes fixed on Jin.

“Goddamn…” He drops to his knees, hands resting at his sides, eyes fixed on your hand as it strokes around your clit.

“Do you wish it was your fingers right now, instead of mine?” you ask.

He nods, tongue darting out of the corner of his mouth. He begins inching toward you on his knees. “Do you think… maybe…?”

“I thought we said no touching,” you tease when he gets to your feet, his head level with your hand, eyes fixed on your wet cunt as you continue to touch yourself.

“I just…” His eyes flick up to meet yours. “I want to smell you.” A pulse of arousal rocks through you at how eager he is. You nod. He moves his nose right over your pubic mound and inhales a long slow savoring breath, tickling your hairs.

“Ah…” He releases a long, loud satisfied moan. His knuckles turn white, but his face is relaxed. “You smell amazing.” He inches even closer, just millimeters separating you from his face and inhales again.

“Oh shit.” You feel the pleasure skyrocketing as your orgasm catches you off guard. You grab him by the back of the head to stabilize yourself and his nose bumps firmly against your clit.

He groans again, loudly right against you as he grinds his nose into you, letting you ride his face as your orgasm washes over you. You thread your fingers through his hair to hold him in place. He wraps his hands around the back of your thighs to press himself into you harder. You cry out as waves of muscle contraction course through you over and over.

“Fuck…” you both say in unison as you collapse back against the door. Your eyes meet and you both start laughing. He places a light kiss right below your belly button before he gets up.

“Well, I see why that was worth getting suspended for,” he says, unzipping his jumpsuit and using the bottom of his shirt to wipe his face.

“And you didn’t even come yet.” You slide your underwear back up, wondering if he would consider a blowjob to be a step too far before your first date.

“Um, actually…” he gestures down at his crotch and the new wet spot you find there makes your pelvic muscles clench.

“You came in your pants? Over me?”

Jin laughs. “God, you have no idea how sexy you are, do you?” He picks up your clothing off the floor, before kissing you softly on the forehead. “I will have a hard time waiting for Monday.”

“Me too.” You mutter and get a sudden sinking feeling. You don’t want this to be over right now. You want to stay here with him, to cuddle and be held by him, but you have made this very clear to everyone involved that these dalliances are not relationships. It’s just sex. And now the sex is over. Until next week.

You slip back into your clothes and give him one last kiss. You tablet pings as you head out into the hallway and you fish it out of your pocket.

Yoongi: Okay, I’m in.

Below his message is his signed HR form. A swell of smug satisfaction makes you smile as you cross the hall and climb into your own pod. You open up a group message for the five men whose signed forms you now have in your possession and type out the following:

Mondays: Jin

Tuesdays: Jungkook

Wednesdays: Taehyung

Thursdays: Jimin

Fridays: Yoongi

“Saturday and Sunday to be determined,” you whisper to yourself as you hit send.

____

Next part

[diavolosthots]

Hey Queen! Beautiful Queen whom I love and adore! <3 It's me! Your bitch! That bitch! I was just thinking like, some wholesome Belphie is very much needed everywhere and for everyone. Like, MC is feeling super cuddly and stuff and they go to Belphie and it's just super fluffy and super cute, and really sweet - @belphies-cuhm-sluht <3

I scrolled until I found your request because I know you need it and I hope you feel better soon, cutie @belphies-cuhm-sluht

Cow Pillow (BELPHEGOR X GN!READER)

It used to be that sleeping your life away felt almost like a sin, like it wasn’t allowed. There was a time for sleeping and there was a time for doing things and out of 24 hours in a day, only eight could be spent resting or you’d feel guilty. Maybe it’s the work drive in you or maybe it’s the feeling of endless guilt that makes you feel like you have to prove yourself by doing things, more things, and definitely things done better than by others. Maybe it’s also because too many people called you lazy throughout your life so you vowed to never be lazy, somewhat neglecting your own self to prove to others that you were worth it. Who cares if you suffered, as long as everyone else was happy with you, right? 

But throughout the years you found loopholes in that. They’re not even loopholes, but to you it makes more sense, and it makes you feel less guilty, rather than outright admitting that you like being lazy. These loopholes range from things like “I have spring allergies so I need some more rest…” to “well, it’s technically not due until the 25th…” to “People deserve love and affection and cuddling is my preferred type. It’s necessary to be loved in order to function.” All of these are valid all on their own, and yes, all of them are considered valid reasons, but it still makes you feel guilty admitting that, so you call them loopholes. Life’s loopholes to make you feel a little less shitty about something that’s, in all actuality, completely normal. 

Today’s ‘loophole’ however, was actually something new to you, kind of. It was rainy and storming; the perfect weather to kick back and just relax. Maybe read a book so you couldn’t call yourself completely lazy. After all, reading does challenge the brain and as long as you’re stimulating some part of yourself, whether that be mental or physical, it’s okay, right? It totally counts. But you also had someone with you that’s… the complete opposite of you and he lured you in. He lures you into the deep depths of laziness that you’re unsure you’ll ever be able to get out of once you’re in them. It’s almost creepy how he does it, too, without even lifting a finger. Without a worry in his mind. Without… trying. 

Belphegor didn’t care what people thought and somewhere, you admired him for that. He made it seem so easy. So what, he sleeps for 36 hours straight and no one bats an eye. If they do, he just avoids them. He doesn’t even pretend to give them the time of day and he’s explained it to you many times before. “Why would I worry about people I will never have to deal with, ever? Now that’s tiresome.” and it made sense. It would be tiresome to constantly think about how other people view you, don’t you think? Belphegor himself is hated by some, neutral for many, and loved by few, but he doesn’t care. The few people that love him, love him a whole lot and that’s all it takes for him. Maybe it’s also easier for him because that’s his avatar. Maybe. He does wonder how you do worry so much, though, because to him, that is crazy. 

He actually made it a point to influence you as much as he can just because you’re almost as bad as Lucifer when it comes to getting stuff done and besides the fact that it’s, in his eyes, annoying, he also doesn’t want someone as interesting as you to end up with Lucifer. What’s that supposed to be? Wanna-be dad and step-parent? The last thing he needs is for the person he’s interested in to call him son. No thank you. Anyway, he made it a point to enter your dreams and drag them out a little bit (a lot) longer than they’d usually have. The small “oh my God I slept through my alarm!” that he heard the first few times had him laughing, but also thinking about how adorable it is. “You worry too much…” is what he’d mumble in his own sleepy voice. 

Now it’s gotten to a point where he openly talks to you in your dreams and you willingly drag things out with him, but when you try to do the same in the actual world? He pretends to be asleep. Not because he doesn’t like talking to you, but he just feels more comfortable when he’s somewhat in control and can remove himself from the situation if need be, you know? That’s why he keeps his distance. He did openly admit that to you, though, and that’s fine. At least you know where he stands and that he doesn’t hate you. However, today you just… you just can’t wait until you fall asleep and until he enters your mind. It’s raining outside and you feel somewhat lonely. You’re in need of company and he’s your favorite type of company, even if you mainly hang out together in your mind. So today, you decided to just go into his room and join him. The worst he can do is say no, right? 

But he didn’t even do that. As a matter of fact, he didn’t even realize you entered until you stood in front of him and in all honesty, he didn’t even fully register that either. It’s more like… he realizes he’s not alone but he’s also not awake and he definitely doesn’t care enough to open his eyes. “Hm?” You were already whispering his name, explaining awkwardly that you just needed to cuddle. “Cuddle…” he just repeated the last word, rolling over onto his back and for a moment you feared he didn’t even recognize a thing you just said. “Okay… come here then.” “Hm? Are you sure? I can leave again Belphie…” Maybe you should take this day to do something productive? Everyone else will already be lazy so one person should do something, right? 

“Yes, come here. Lay down so I can lay on you.” He’s still not opening his eyes, only scooting back for you to join him on his bed and then waiting. You can either join or leave again and he doesn’t really care which option you choose. Except he does. He just won’t admit it if you choose wrong. “O...okay… yeah. I’m already here.” And you really, really would like to cuddle with him, after all. You laid down beside him, carefully, trying to respect his boundaries but also trying to remember that he did want to lay on you so should You lay on your back? “Oh… oh yeah okay this is fine.” You couldn’t even ask him because the minute he felt the bed dip, he moved back closer to you and curled into your side, placing his head on your chest and wrapping his arm around you. 

“Is this okay? Belphie?” He only hummed in response, nuzzling into you, and you carefully wrapped your arms around him too. It felt nice. Really nice, and you found yourself relaxing almost immediately, although you did blame it on Belphie more than anything. He does have that calming effect on people after all. “You’re better than the pillow, but…” You looked down at his head confused until you felt him shift, his face buried deep in your chest now while he tried to keep his horns away from poking you. His tail swayed behind him for a second before wrapping around your waist right beside his arms. “That’s better…” you looked at him, poking his horn for a moment before laughing. How is this better? How is this comfortable? Can he breathe? He must be breathing otherwise he wouldn’t lay like this, right? 

“You worry too much…” “What?” How did he know? You weren’t even asleep yet. He chuckled, lifting his head a bit and smiling at you, eyes still closed. “I don’t need you to be asleep in order to be inside your head… stop worrying so much. I know you want this.” He put his head back down right after, his whole body relaxing against yours and for a moment you wondered if this actually happened. “Belphie… I just…!” “Yeah I know. You want this but you worry about not doing enough. Just shut up already, okay? You, of all people, deserve to relax and what better way to relax than with me? Just ssshh… go to sleep. I won’t let you leave until I decide that you have rested enough.” And by that he means… you’re stuck with him on top of you until the next day has come and he’s thoroughly convinced you took some time for yourself. 

“You’re so silly, Belphie…” But it also felt really, really nice to have someone that seemed to care so much. And he does. He cares a lot. And he wishes you’d be more like him, in a sense, but then again… he’d just keep you with him at all times and make you his new cow pillow. It’s not like that’s going to be an issue, though, right? 

[theladyofdeath]

Life As We Know It {Chapter 10}

Summary: After the sudden deaths of Nesta’s sister and Cassian’s best friend, they gain guardianship of their nephew, Nyx.

Based on Life As We Know It (2010) and a prompt sent in by anonymous for our Nessian fanfic contest. This is a modern au.

Instead of doing a tag list for this story, we have decided to have a set posting schedule. Chapters will be posted weekly on Mondays and Thursdays. Chapters will be posted on both my and Shelby’s blogs! >> @snelbz​

Life As We Know It Masterlist

Shelby’s Masterlist

Tara’s Masterlist

Cassian poured Alis Birch a cup of coffee and sat across the rug from her on the couch.

It had been ten minutes since Cassian let her inside, and Nesta still wasn’t downstairs.

“Where is Ms. Archeron?” Alis asked, surely sensing Cassian’s nervousness. 

“She’ll be down in a minute,” Cassian promised, reminding himself to sit up straight. “She was just getting out of the bath. She often enjoys those at night.”

“Hmm.” Alis set the mug down on top of a coaster on the side table. She hadn’t taken a drink. After reaching into her bag for a binder, she opened it up and cleared her throat. “Am I correct in the understanding that you and Ms. Archeron are not in a relationship?”

Cassian swallowed. “That is correct.” 

“Interesting,” she began, clicking her tongue. “I must say that I’ve never heard of such a situation.” 

“The situation was exactly planned,” he said, a slight tone settling into his voice. “Her sister died. My best friend died. They wanted us, as Nyx’s godparents, to take care of him. We…wanted to honor their wishes.”

She took a few notes. “Which I find very admirable of you two. Just as long as there are no complications.”

Cassian blinked. “Complications?”

Nesta’s voice came from the stairs and Alis looked up. “Hi, I’m so sorry, we weren’t expecting you!”

She cleared her throat and stood as Nesta approached. “Yes, Ms. Archeron, that’s the point of random visit. We don’t want you to be prepared for it. We want to see you in your everyday life.” She shook Nesta’s hand and they sat down. “Now, I assume Nyx is asleep?”

“Yeah, but I can go get him if I need to,” Cassian replied, hooking a thumb over his shoulder, towards the stairs.

Nesta slapped his thigh with the back of her hand.

“No, no, that won’t be necessary,” Alis replied, an eyebrow raising at Nesta, before she went back to scribbling in her notebook. “We know you’re keeping him on a proper sleep schedule, at least.”

“Right,” Nesta nodded. “Two naps a day and in bed by eight, most nights.” She opened a water bottle Cassian had strategically sat on the side table and took a sip. “You two were talking about complications when I was coming downstairs? What sort of complications?”

Frankly, Alis asked, “I was just asking Mr. Nazari if you two are sleeping with each other?”

Water sprayed from Nesta’s mouth, thankfully over Cassian, not the social worker.

Even he seemed too stunned to be upset.

“If we are sleeping together?” She asked. She shook her head, adamantly. “No, cauldron, definitely not.”

“You seem offended by that,” Alis said, tilting her head. “Is there anything else going on? Any conflict?”

“Oh, no,” Nesta answered, far too quickly. “No, we’re just fine. Friends, even. Well, maybe not friends, but we don’t exactly hate one another.”

“Alright,” Cassian interjected. “Thank you, Nesta, for that. We are just getting to know each other is all she’s saying.”

“It seems like she’s saying a lot more than that,” Alis muttered, but shook her head. “Have there been any doctor visits or any other scares?”

“Nesta-.”

“I took Nyx to the doctor this morning,” Nesta said, interrupting Cassian. “Nasty rash on his ass, but nothing to be too worried about, at least that’s what his doctor said. Other than that, no scares.”

Gods, she was still drunk. She had to be, if she was telling the social worker assigned to their case that Nyx had a nasty rash on his ass.

Alis paused her note taking, looking at the two of them. “Have either of you ever taken care of a child before? Long term?”

Cassian shook his head, but Nesta said, “I was keeping Nyx, when the accident happened. It hadn’t been long, but I was taking care of him.”

Cassian knew that wasn’t the type of long term they were looking for, but thankfully, Alis didn’t push. She just resituated her notebook and asked, “Ms. Archeron, what is it you do for a living?”

Nesta immediately perked up. “I am the head chef and owner of the Thyme & Rosemary Café.”

Alis looked impressed for the first time all evening. “You’re a business owner?”

“Yes, ma’am,” Nesta replied, nodding. “I opened the café right after culinary school, thanks to some generous investors, and we’ve had a very successful four years, having a profitable year every year we’ve been open.”

Cassian looked out of the corner of his eye at the woman next to him on the couch. He knew Nesta had her own restaurant, but he had no idea how well she’d been doing.

“And you, Mr. Nazari?”

He turned to look at her and scratched at the back of his neck. “I, uh… I’m a bartender.”

Blinking slowly, Alis asked, “A bartender?”

He saw Nesta cringe from where she sat next to him,but mercifully, she kept her mouth shut. “Well, technically, I’m a bar manager, but I do help make and serve the drinks, on top of my many managerly duties.”

Nesta’s head fell into her hand.

He cleared his throat ignoring her. “I also make and sell homemade, custom acoustic guitars.”

Alis nearly looked impressed. “Is that so?”

Cassian nodded. “It’s mostly just a hobby, but I sell on Etsy and at art shows from time to time. Someday, I hope for it to be a full time gig. Bartending definitely pays the bills in the meantime, though.”

“I see,” Alis said, at last. “So, you’re telling me that Nyx is fully supported financially?”

“Fully,” Cassian said, just as Nesta said, “Damn straight.”

Drunk Nesta was an interesting creature, Cassian decided.

Alis clicked her tongue as she flipped through her binder. “One last question for the evening. What do you do with Nyx when you’re both at work?”

“We hired a nanny recently,” Cassian said. “She’s highly qualified and great with Nyx.”

“And has great qualities, if you ask Cassian,” Nesta added with a wink.

“I don’t follow,” Alis replied, looking at him.

Mother’s tits, he was going to kill her. “She recently received a degree in early childhood education from University of Velaris,” he said, covering Nesta’s ass. “No major jobs yet, but we decided her qualifications outweighed her lack of experience. And Nyx loves her, so we have no complaints so far.”

“Got it,” she replied, looking between the two of them.

As she looked down to scribble in her notebook, Cassian shoved the water bottle she’d sat down on the cushions back into her hands.

“I think I’ve seen enough,” Alis said, standing abruptly, closing her notebook and replacing it in her bag. They both stood as well, Nesta thankfully not swaying on her feet. As she headed for the front door, she informed them, “Your next visit will be random as well.”

“Will it at least be in the daytime,” Nesta muttered, and Cassian pinched her ass, silently telling her to shut the hell up.

Nesta stood up a little straighter, but that was the only indication that she was following Cassian’s annoyance.

“You two have a good night,” Alis said. “Next time, I’ll have to come when Nyx is awake.”

“That would be lovely,” Cassian promised.

Nesta snorted.

Alis looked at them both before nodding her head in respect and following Cassian out. When he shut the door behind her, Cassian stormed to Nesta and crossed his arms. “What the hell?”

“What the hell what?” Nesta asked, then laughed. “I think that went well.”

“Yeah, thanks to me,” Cassian said.

“Thanks to you?” Nesta asked, brows shot into her hairline. “You were struggling down here until I came along.”

Cassian blinked, then laughed. “You’re drunk!”

“I’m fine!”

“You can hardly string a sentence together!” Cassian argued. “If we were to lose Nyx, it would be your fault.”

“Bullshit,” she snapped, getting in his face. “She loved that I was a business owner. It was impressive.”

“So is your breath, you smell like a winery,” he said, stepping back and fanning in front of his face.

In all reality, she didn’t smell like wine. She smelled like lavender and vanilla…and sex. But Cassian had to step away from that smell, especially as his memory flashed with what he’d interrupted.

Her face didn’t indicate that her feelings were particularly warm towards him in that moment, but he sighed and said, “It went okay, and that’s a good thing, no matter what. We just…need to be a little prepared for her next time.”

She sighed, agreeing.

“You can…go back to your bath now,” Cassian said, clearing his throat.

Nesta’s cheeks heated. “I was done anyways.”

The words flitted through Cassian’s head before he could stop them. Didn’t look like you were done. Looked like you were right in the middle of something.

He swallowed, sharply, and nodded. “I’m going to try and have that beer again. Heat up some more lasagna.”

She nodded, and said, “Sounds good. I’m gonna try and get some sleep.”

“Well, goodnight,” Cassian said, his eyes still connected with hers.

“Goodnight,” she said, and yet, neither of them moved. Nesta asked, after a moment, “Did you like my lasagna?”

“It was delicious,” Cassian said, even though his words were clipped. 

“Good,” Nesta snapped. “I also made homemade breadsticks. They’re in the fridge. You may have some.”

“Great,” Cassian said, pointedly. “I like breadsticks.” Nesta scoffed. “Who doesn’t?”

The two remained staring at one another.

“I’m going to bed,” Nesta repeated.

“Fine,” Cassian said.

“Fine,” Nesta repeated. “Goodnight.”

“Night.”

She finally turned and made her way up the stairs.

Cassian tried his hardest, damn him, he really did, not to stare at her ass.

He did exactly as he said he was going to do, grabbing a new beer from the fridge, his original one sitting warm on the table in the entryway, and heated up another massive serving of Nesta’s lasagna, tossing a few breadsticks in the toaster oven to heat up as well.

He definitely wouldn’t complain if she wanted to cook dinner for him every night. He hadn’t been lying when he said he could cook breakfast, which he was content to do for himself, but if this was how great her dinners were, he wanted to know what her breakfast tasted like.

Which then made him think about reasons she would have made him breakfast, in any other situation than the one they were in.

He could still see her head thrown back, half lidded eyes rolling back in ecstasy. And the soft moan he’d heard. He imagined her making that noise while she writhed underneath him, as he thrust into her, plunging deep and-.

Fuck, this wasn’t good.

This was so not good.

*

Nesta had the day off and she was grateful for it, considering she had a pounding headache and was sick to her stomach.

Thanks, alcohol.

Cassian went to the bar early to prep for opening, and Nesta was left alone with Nyx, who didn’t give a damn about her hangover. 

They were currently in the living room, Nyx standing up in his bouncer, and Nesta popping her third round of ibuprofen. 

With a sigh, Nesta shook her head. “Don’t ever drink, buddy.”

Nyx simply grinned in response.

As she turned on the tv, Nesta’s phone chimed.

A text.

Excited for our non-date tomorrow. We still on for noon?

Balthazar hadn’t given her his cell phone number when she’d left the doctor’s office the day before, only the office number, in case of “emergencies”.

She saved Bal’s number, before sending a quick reply back.

I hope you didn’t pull my number from your patient database. That seems very irresponsible. But yes, noon sounds perfect.

She sent the text off, her attention bouncing from the television to Nyx. She did her best not to watch her phone.

Nyx’s hands reached out to Nesta, and he began babbling. He was hungry.

As she took him out of his bouncer and carried him into the kitchen, Nesta’s phone went off, once more.

I would never be so unprofessional. I put in ten digits and got lucky.

Nesta snorted but forced herself not to reply so quickly. She didn’t want to give off the wrong impression.

Which is what? She asked herself as she put Nyx into his high chair. “You hungry, buddy?”

She spread a small layer of Puffs on his high chair tray, swiping one for herself as she pulled her phone out of her pocket and wrote back. She chewed slowly as she typed.

Some luck you have then. Maybe we should play the lottery on the way home from our not-date.

She sat her phone down and began heating a small portion of raviolis on the stove for Nyx. She couldn’t bring herself to make lunch for him from scratch. Her head was pounding too hard and she wanted to lay him down for a nap so she could take one, too.

After his chubby hands were sufficiently covered in pasta sauce, Nesta was cleaning them off by the sink when she glanced at the calendar they’d hung up to designate when someone was on baby duty and when either of them had big plans. She froze as she remembered that tomorrow was Cassian’s day to be off, while she was supposed to be looking after Nyx.

She knew she could very well take Nyx along to lunch with Balthazar, the man worked with kids, it wasn’t like he wasn’t used to them. But she knew there was a difference in separating work from personal life, it was the reason she hadn’t suggested her restaurant when he’d asked her to lunch. Hadn’t even mentioned Rosemary & Thyme. Not to mention, she would appreciate some uninterrupted time with him.

She would have to convince Cassian to watch Nyx for her tomorrow. Just for a few hours.

It shouldn’t be too hard, right?

*

Cassian got home just after one in the morning.

He had worked all day, thanks to the pick up in customers they’d had. It was good for business, of course, but he was exhausted.

And surprised, as he saw that Nesta was still awake, reading a book on the couch.

“More smut?” Cassian asked, tossing his keys on the end table.

Nesta’s eyes shot to him and narrowed. “That’s none of your concern.”

Cassian laughed, quietly, as he wandered into the kitchen. “Did Nyx have a good day?”

“He did,” Nesta said, nodding. “I had a pretty good day, too. How was your day?”

Cassian blinked, slowly turning to face her. “Fine. You sound suspicious.”

“I’m not suspicious,” she said, closing her book and setting it, cover down, on the coffee table.

It was Cassian’s turn to narrow his eyes, and he looked around the corner, into the kitchen, half expecting to see it in flames or some other disaster she was hiding from him.

“What’s up, Nes?” He said, looking back at her and leaning his shoulder on the door frame.

“Nothing is up, why would anything be up?”

She asked, not meeting his eyes.

He came and sat down next to her on the couch, leaving her nowhere to look, but at him.

She cleared her throat, knowing she’d been caught, but looked over the back of her book, resting in front of them. “I need you to do me a favor.”

He was thankful she wasn’t looking at him as his eyes dipped down to her hand resting on her lap, that hand that had been submerged under her bath water the night before. “What kind of favor?”

“I…need you to watch Nyx for a few hours tomorrow during the day,” she said, looking back at him and he dragged his eyes back to hers.

He blinked, as if he were processing his request. “What? Why?” He asked, then shook his head. “It’s my day off, you’re watching him tomorrow.”

Just as Cassian began to stand, Nesta grabbed for his hand. “Please! His pediatrician asked me to have lunch with him, and I’d really prefer not to take him along. I’ll still watch him all night, you can go hang out with Az or do whatever you want to do.”

He was so hung up on her words that he barely registered that her hand was clutching his. “His pediatrician?” He asked, alarm on his face. “Is he okay? I thought you said it was just a diaper rash!”

“No, no, Nyx is fine,” she promised. “This is less of a professional visit.”

“Less of a…” His words trailed off. “You’re going on a date with Nyx’s doctor?”

His voice was colder than she’d expected it to be.

“It’s not a date,” Nesta explained. “It’s a...non-date. Two acquaintances having lunch,” she said, repeating what Bal had said to her.

Cassian just stared at her, continuing to process. “Two...acquaintances? Nesta, that’s a fucking date.”

“And what if it is?” Nesta asked, exasperated, her own anger rising from his anger. “What if it is a date? Why does it matter?”

“It doesn’t,” Cassian snapped.

“Sure as hell sounds like it does,” Nesta shot back.

“We have a baby now, Nesta, we can’t just date!” He said.

Nesta’s brows shot up. “And why is that?”

Cassian hesitated. “Because.”

Nesta snorted. “Great answer, Cassian.” He didn’t respond and she asked, “Do you have plans tomorrow afternoon?”

For a moment, he just glared at her before he finally admitted, “No.”

She stood, still holding onto his hand. “Please, Cass. I’ll owe you the biggest favor. You can have any day off you want. Please.”

He wasn’t sure if it was the way she said his name, that shortened nickname she never used, or the promise of a future Friday night off. It may have been the genuine plea in her voice, but he sighed.

“Fine. I’ll- I’ll watch him for you tomorrow.”

“Yes, thank you!” She threw her arms around him, squeezing tightly, and then suddenly stepped back, realizing what she’d done. “Sorry, I’ll just…” She picked up her book, clutching it to her chest. “Goodnight. Thank you.”

She was headed for the stairs before he’d even moved.

He just stood there, watching her go, wondering if he just made the dumbest decision of his week.

[openheart12]

The One

A/N: Set during The Conjuring. 

Summary: Ed tends to Lorraine’s injuries after the fall she takes. No matter how strong a person thinks they are, it’s always nice to have someone take care of you. 

WC: 1,473

After finding Cindy in the hole in the back of the wardrobe, Lorraine found herself crawling through it after what April had told her of Rory hiding back there. She shined her light that fell onto shelves built into the hiding space with miscellaneous items thrown around on top of them, but one spot caught her eye: a place that was free of the pent up years’ worth of dust that matched the outline of the music box April showed her earlier. 

“Hon? Could I have April’s music box please?”

“Yeah,” Ed answered, getting up to retrieve the item and handing it to her, “there you go.”

“Thank you.” She lined up the music box in the same place and sure enough, it was an exact fit. She then shined her light further down where there was a rope hanging down. Pulling it up, the outline of a noose became clear and her breathing quickened. 

She stood up just as the floor gave out under her weight and she was falling, how far she couldn’t tell. A scream escaped her as she plummeted down onto the ground below, her flashlight getting lost in the dark.

“Lorraine!” Ed screamed when he heard her fall. “No,” he said in shock.

Lorraine let out a groan as she tried to get her bearings while Ed was running down the stairs, frantically calling out her name. 

“Lorraine! Lorraine!” He called, pounding his fists on the wall in an attempt to see where she might’ve fallen. “Lorraine! Lorraine!” He checked another wall, still no sign of her. 

She let out another groan, her hand covering the small cut on her forehead. It took a few seconds for her eyes to adjust to the darkness of the room. She located the flashlight and moved it across the room, trying to find any sign of where she was. 

It looked to be the cellar filled with the junk from the previous home owners. The sound of a weeping woman echoed throughout the small space, freezing Lorraine in her movements. The music box let out a noise, letting her know that it had fallen right beside her and she picked it up, turning the key to play the music.

She stared at her reflection while moving the flashlight around hoping to find some answers. The weeping woman appeared in the reflection and she was holding the body of a young boy, repeating “she made me do it. She made me do it.” The woman turned her head towards Lorraine and when she turned her head, the woman was gone. 

Putting down the music box, the same woman was now sitting in front of her and Lorraine let out a gasp. “She made me do it,” she repeated again. The sound of creaking tore Lorraine’s attention away and then the woman disappeared when she looked back. A body hanging from a noose made Lorraine jump back in surprise.

Breathing heavy, Lorraine backed away from the body that had now turned towards her. She screamed again, calling out for Ed while running up the stairs leading to the house. 

“Come on! Lorraine!” Ed called out again, still searching for his wife. 

“Ed!” Lorraine screamed, suddenly something caught her around the neck and was trying to pull her back, but she managed to escape just as her necklace broke off. “Ed!” She called out again. “Ed, I know what she did.” She exclaimed as Ed opened the door leading to the cellar. 

“I got ya,” he reassured, relief washing over him. Hr grabbed ahold of her arms, the contact reassuring him that she was alive. 

“I know what she did,” she repeated. “I know what she did.”

“What?”

“She possessed the mother to kill the child. She visits Carolyn every night. That’s what the bruise marks are! She’s feeding off of her!” Lorraine explained. The crucifixes Ed had put out earlier were rattling and they began to fall down. Nancy’s hair was rising above her head when something had picked her up off the floor and slammed her into the wall, shattering the glass.

They tried to hold her down but the force was too strong and they were all being dragged across the floor. Lorraine had to cut her hair to break the force and the girl was free, clinging onto Roger for support. 

Later, as Ed explained to Roger that they would be getting the footage over to Father Gordon to get a response, that he would come back with the exorcist but without Lorraine. She had been through enough for a lifetime. He still hadn’t been able to check her injuring himself and it was eating away at him, wondering if she really was okay or not. 

He watched for a second as the family of seven drove off before heading back inside where he found Lorraine sitting at the kitchen table. He took in her appearance; her tattered and dirtied clothes, the cut that was still bleeding on her forehead, and the faint outline of a bruise on her neck. He had no doubt that hidden bruises covered the rest of her frail body. 

“Lorraine…” he whispered hoarsely. This is exactly what he had been afraid of when they agreed to take this case. The thought of her getting hurt wasn’t compared to when she actually got hurt. 

“I’m fine,” she lied automatically.

“You know, I can tell when you’re lying to me too.”

She shot him a sheepish smile. “I will be fine,” she tried again.

“Lorraine…” he warned. 

“It’s just a small cut, Ed. I’ve had far worse,” she said, referencing those eight days she locked herself away from anyone and everyone, including Ed himself. 

“I just want to make sure, for my sake. Please,” he begged and she finally relented. He led her to the downstairs bathroom where he remembered seeing a first aid kit. “Sit down,” he softly commanded, pointing to the edge of the tub. 

He took all the supplies he would need from ointments and bandages to disinfectants and pain relievers. “Is all that really necessary?” Lorraine questioned. 

“Yeah,” he replied simply, moving to stand in front of her where he lightly touched her forehead. “How bad does it hurt?”

“I barely feel a thing.”

He gently cleaned the cut and applied some ointment before putting on a band-aid. He then moved on to the faint bruise on her neck. “How bad does this one hurt?”

“Not too bad,” she promised.

“What happened?”

“Something grabbed me, I don’t know what it was. It tried pulling me back but I was able to escape.”

“That’s my girl,” he smiled and she mirrored his expression. There wasn’t much he could do for a bruise so he settled on placing a kiss to the base of her throat. “Does anything else hurt? And tell me the truth.”

She debated on whether or not to tell him, but ultimately decided to because he would’ve known either way. “Yeah, m-my side and knee hurt pretty bad.” 

He gingerly pulled up her pant leg on the leg she pointed out and he already noticed the dried blood that had dripped down. Her knee must’ve gotten scraped after the fall and he cleaned it up before applying a bandage to the area. Helping her remove her blouse and vest, he noticed several bruises forming on her abdomen. He placed his fingertips against her bare skin and goose bumps appeared from his touch. 

A shaky breath escaped past his lips at the condition she was in. “I’m fine,” she reassured, noticing the tears forming in his eyes.

“I’m so glad you’re okay,” he said as a single tear rolled down his cheek. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too.”

“Is now a bad time to bring up the book again?” He teased her. 

“Ask me again when this case is over,” she responded as they shared a laugh. 

He helped her with her clothes, finishing the last buttons on her blouse for her. He noticed the many cuts and scrapes that covered her hands most likely from the fall as well. He wrapped his arms around her small frame, burying his face in the crook of her neck. He breathed in the scent that made her her. 

“Are you okay?” She asked, knowing that if their roles were reversed, she would be just as worried.

“I’m okay as long as you are,” he replied, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. “I’ll be even better once we get home.” 

“Me too,” she replied. The case was almost over and that meant they were one step closer to being in the comfort of their own home, but if she was being completely honest, her home was wherever Ed was. Even if that was in a house haunted by evil demons.

[amethystpath-writes]

P2 A Nice Catch

Part 1 here

(NOT A PROMPT)

Oooh, A Nice Catch was *chef's kiss*. Could you continue it? Maybe completely, not thinking straight, grief-stricken villain goes after Supervillain and the supervillain hurts him because the villain is very dangerous/angry and then maybe the Supervillain has to caretaker because they have a bleeding, sobbing villain at his feet.

Sorry if that seems bossy or specific, but i really loved the piece and my brain went haywire with all the possible endings. But do whatever you want to.

Not bossy at all <3

******

Flashing red lights on a Saturday. Supervillain sighed. The sound was probably the most obnoxious part of it all. No matter. Needs to be dealt with. Even his thoughts were gruff and tired. He would never admit it to anyone else but tracking down that little rat and weakening her was difficult. No wonder Villain struggled with her so much. Doesn’t explain how he developed feelings for someone so righteous though.

‘I don’t know what your life has entailed but there are other ways of healing. I can help you.’ Hero had said to him upon being captured.

Healing. Supervillain scoffed as he urged himself off the couch, turning the television off, and flipping off the lights, trying to make the quarters look vacant. There were various other electronics still on, but they were necessary for security- which was currently blaring.

I don’t need healing. I need power. Power to take down all those shitty, rich neighbourhoods. What good were they when so many people were left on the streets, starving, and begging for pocket change? The rich didn’t care, and for it they would perish. Villain used to agree.

Now, Villain was bent on a ‘The rich are a necessary part of the economy. Without them, there would be a middle class and the rest of the economy profits off the middle class,’ idea.

With a grumble, Supervillain left his lounging area, walking instead to the monitor room.

“Camera one, good. Camera two, fine. Cam three. Four. Five. Six. Then why the hell are the alarms going off?”

Not a single room revealed even a twitch of movement or a breeze to rattle lobby plants.

Ker-pshhh. The radio. The only other people working right now were part of the security faction. Meaning, Supervillain needed to respond, especially since the radio was going off. He grabbed the speaker off the side of the metal box and brought it to his mouth while holding the button. “What is it?” It no doubt had to do with the alarms.

“Sir? There’s been a breach in Building 2, third hall monitoring room. One body confirmed to be dead.”

“Any others?”

“No response from Radios 8 through 13. I’m in room Fourteen now��Sir? I think I’m next.”

Supervillain pinched his brow. “Have you gotten into contact with Buildings 3 and 4 yet?”

“No response from them. I’d gotten the alert from Radio 21 and sent it to Building 1 as soon as I got it. I don’t know who it is, Sir, but if they’ve made it as far as they have then I’m afraid-”

There was a crash on the other end of the radio before it cut out. Supervillain cursed under his breath before slamming a hand on the counter before him. He squeezed the button on the radio. “Whoever you are,” Supervillain growled into the speaker, “you’re dead.”

Silence.

Silence.

Silence.

Ker-pshhh.

“Oh, I’m very much alive,” a voice said. A voice which made Supervillain groan and slap his forehead with the blunt of his hand.

“Villain, what the hell are you doing?” His voice was more disappointed than anything and he released yet another groan. “Don’t tell me this is because of the rat.”

It didn’t take a second for Villain to respond. “She isn’t a rat.”

Isn’t. Oh boy, this was a case of grief, wasn’t it? “You didn’t dress her up and put her in your kitchen to eat breakfast with, did you?” Supervillain joked. “Probably had to spritz her with some of your cologne a few times, huh? Would smell like rotten meat otherwise.”

“You must want me to kill you. It’s why you tried to kill her, isn’t it? Isn’t it? You’re sick of living this sad and vengeful life, so you did the one thing that would piss me off enough to do this- to sabotage your own business.”

“Villain, old buddy, you’re in over your head.” A sigh. “I killed her, alright? She’s dead.” Supervillain refrained from calling Hero a rat for another time, seeing as it sent Villain over the edge. “And it was for your own good. You were becoming weak, and your business was falling because of it. Do you even realize how much fell apart all because you let her slither into your heart?”

“The old boxing pit on Third Street,” Supervillain explained, “underwent construction shortly before you were about to buy it. You know what was left at the scene- what the media didn’t cover? A mallet with Hero’s DNA on the handle. She smacked at the foundation, Villain, until it was bad enough to need repaired. What’d you go and do then? You bought a greenhouse instead- reported to your employees that it would benefit them because they wouldn’t need to go buy a lunch for themselves. She manipulated you, Villain, into someone you’re not.”

“She helped me become the best person I could be,” Villain gritted out, but his voice sounded with an echo. Supervillain paid it little mind.

“The rat changed your priorities.”

“They needed to be changed.” Supervillain squeezed his eyes shut, grimacing at the door slamming against a wall as Villain came crashing in. Well, that’s why I heard his voice twice. Once through a radio, and second through the door.

“That’s gonna cost you, but I tell you what.” Supervillain spun on a heel and told Villain, “You go in halfsies and I’ll let this whole thing slide.”

Nothing could have stopped the fist which Villain sent towards Supervillain, one nearly bone-crushing. One which sent Supervillain staggering back into his radio, pushing it up against the wall with a bang.

“I’m the one in the position to grant mercy, not you.” Villain began walking towards Supervillain as he regained himself but as Villain raised a fist, his old friend launched a hand of his own forward, grasping it tightly. In Villain’s shock, he lacked the response to pull away, and was instead pulled towards Supervillain while being turned, his back flush against Supervillain’s chest, his arm skewered behind his own back.

Of course, Villain fought against his old friend, wanting nothing other than to send another fast-flying fist in Supervillain’s face…or his groin.

“Villain. Villain, hey!” This made the more vengeful of the two cease his struggle. “Look, I know you’re mad, alright? You loved the ra- Hero, and you were blinded by that love, so much so that it clouded your judgement. It happens to the best of us, Villain.”

“You killed her.” Villain gave another jerk, this time with a tear in his eye. Realizing such raw emotion was leaking out, he corrected himself with a shout, “She was everything I had!”

Supervillain sighed, tightening his grip as Villain continued fighting him. “Yeah…you said that one before.” Supervillain let go, not waiting a moment before pushing Villain’s back, causing him to stumble forward, nearly passing through the door which he left open when he so rudely barged in. “Villain, listen to me, bud. You are better off without her. That love you felt was going to cause you to lose everything you worked so hard to build, and even if that weren’t the result, you would always have this internal conflict- to do-”

“To do the right or wrong thing?” Villain seethed, righting himself against the doorframe which Supervillain pushed him towards. “Supervillain, we’ve been doing wrong this whole time! Nothing we have done has been good by any moralistic means. We kill people.”

We kill people. Supervillain could almost laugh at the irony. “You killed at least one of my men today. One, which was confirmed out of twenty-eight. You’re just as bad as me.”

“Because you killed the one person in this world I could ever find myself loving.”

“You depended on her dammit! Don’t you see what I’m seeing? You don’t even know who you are without her coaxing her own ideas into your ear. You needed this. You needed her gone.”

“I needed her.” Villain’s voice finally broke like the day Hero was killed, when she was shoved through without remorse, discarded like a candy wrapper, and called a ‘rat’ without pause. “I needed her, and you stole her from me.”

Can’t bring her back, now, can I? But Supervillain didn’t say this, for he knew it was entirely pointless. Villain would just keep repeating those same few phrases, which Supervillain heard as, ‘I’m sad. You’re a monster and I can’t acknowledge myself as one. I miss my crutch and my ankle is always broken. Blah. Blah, blah. Blah, blah.’

“You need someone who you can rely on, who can rely on you just as easily, Villain.” Now onto the more sensitive topic once again. “I don’t remember you stepping forward to help Hero when she was shaking beneath my arm. You loved her, but not enough to sacrifice what we have here. We’re friends, Villain. We’ll always be friends. No one knows you as well as I and no one knows me as well as you.”

“Come sit down with me,” Supervillain finished. “In the lobby. I’ve got a few fridges, one with your name on it- literally. You stopped coming around, but I keep a stock of that weird soda you like.”

Supervillain was so casual, so friendly. It was as if he actually cared, had wanted to continue being friends, and had done everything he could to be friends. As much as him killing Hero hurt, as much as Villain wanted to hate him for it…it seemed as though Supervillain did it to help. Because Villain did rely on Hero, didn’t he? He looked to her for everything- even what food to buy. And the timing of the boxing pit was odd; what if Hero really did destroy it so that Villain would buy something else? Something that catered more to her own thoughts and reasoning than his own?

“I’ll sit down for one soda,” Villain said. “One.”

******

@digitalart-tw I considered being kind and bringing the Hero back. I really did. But the evil runs rampantly through my veins and knows no end.​

[stillebesat]

Be My Dad

Sanders Sides: Janus, Logan  A Vague AU Writing Prompt: @wildhorsewolf​ asked: Guess I'm a parent now with Janus being the dad and Logan being the kid Blurb: Janus has no interest in being a parental figure to a kid, but trying to convince the universe of that is another thing entirely.  Fic Type: Familial Soulmate!AU Overall Fic Warnings: Mentions of Scars  Taglist in Reblog.

To most souls, a food court was a necessary evil. Loud. Lots of people. But plenty of food options all together in one place. Perfect for those who liked a variety of choices or those who had picky eaters in tow.

It was a place to meet up with friends, family, or business associates. A place where one could sit back and observe society at work. To see people at their best...and most definitely at their worst. 

There was something soothing about the chaos that Janus enjoyed...as a spectator. He could never imagine being right in the middle of it.

Not unless he was doing what he was doing right now. Trying to hide in plain sight in the middle of a crowd.

After all. He was thirty now. Single. Childless.

Obviously a menace to society in a universe that seemed obsessed with everyone being part of a ‘family.’ 

A Universe that had decreed that all adults who remained childless by the age of thirty, would then be subjected to being bombarded with children in need of a proper parent figure to bond with in their lives.

He exhaled, absently brushing against the raised scar on his cheek, barely looking up as a child burst out wailing nearby.

He’d checked earlier. That particular wailer hadn’t had the golden sparks. It meant he was safe. 

For now.

He ran a hand through his hair, flipping another page in his notebook before he continued scrawling on the page. Maybe Virgil had actually been onto something when he said he was vanishing into the wilderness of Europe for the rest of his life. 

Sure, Janus had laughed six months ago when his best friend had turned thirty and begun complaining about all the kids coming out of the woodwork to ask him to be their Dad.

It’d seemed impossible at the time. To have children want to come up to Mr. Shadows Incarnate and expect Virgil to put them to bed and tell a bedtime story.

Now though, he understood why Vee had become more reluctant to leave his house as the year had worn on. Because the mini spawns really had come out of nowhere once his own thirtieth birthday hit. 

And it was awful. 

Wherever he went, it was inevitable that some child would approach him, shimmering golden sparks floating around them indicating that they were looking for a Parent Bond. 

It was also as inevitable that he would scare them away just as quickly. 

After all, his halfmoon scar and creepy yellow eyes had caused plenty of kids to scream and run with a single look years before his thirtieth birthday. 

No, at least Virgil had a bit of that shy emo charm that made him more approachable, even if the merest appearance of anyone under four feet had his best friend going pale as a corpse and ducking out before the kid could take more than two steps towards him.

Privately he was certain Virgil would find a kid perfect for him before the year was out, despite his best friend’s attempt to avoid the inevitable.

He knew Virge would make a good dad. Compassionate. Protective. His best friend had a dozen other traits that would benefit him when the right child flared with him. 

Unlike Janus.

Who could make a grown man cry with less than four words and a glower.  

No. He couldn’t imagine having any child coming to him in the middle of the night expecting comfort. 

He knew he was intimidating.

He knew he could be scary.

It wouldn’t be fair to subject a child to that on a daily basis.

Honestly, it felt like a slap to the face that no matter how much he achieved, how many degrees he got, or businesses he owned, or careers he pursued, or money he made…

The universe felt that one couldn’t be complete unless said person also had a screaming, slobbering, dirty child in tow.

Janus ran a hand through his hair, again brushing the crescent scar on his cheek as he looked up long enough to watch a cluster of mothers with their dozen and a half children in strollers rush by, seeking salvation at the nearest set of golden arches with at least four of the kids already screaming for their happy meal toy. 

Even if he did make a connection with any kid brave enough to approach him...Janus could never imagine trying to coerce a screaming brat into eating their chicken nuggets all by himself. Could never stand to walk around with food, slobber or worse, vomit stains on his best suits like a badge of honor. Could never be patient enough to listen to the long and rambling and pointless stories he’d heard multiple parents suffer through while observing them here in the food court.

No. There was no way Janus would allow the universe a say in how he ran these next five years of his life.

He had goals.

Life plans.

And he didn’t need some interfering Being with an obviously unhealthy parent complex ruining that.

The scrapping of a chair being pulled back broke through the gentle hum the noise the chaos of the food court had receded to, causing Janus to look up from his paper in time to see a boy, wearing a faded black long sleeved shirt with matching glasses and thankfully older than the screaming toddler throwing french fries six tables over, plop down in the seat across from him.

A child. With golden sparks shimmering in the air around him. 

Oh goodie.

Janus barely stopped himself from rolling his eyes. And here he’d thought that the fact that he’d caused a pair of twin girls, a baby, three boys, six preteens, and four other children under the age of five to scream in terror and/or burst into tears before the lunch rush had even started would have been enough for the universe to call it quits for the day on attempting a Parent Bond.

“I have a prospersition for you.” The boy said, making eye contact. Janus blinked, pen pausing mid stroke as he raised an eyebrow to the child. Prosper...prosper? Oh. “A prop-osition?” He asked, careful to pronounce the word correctly. 

The boy nodded once, pushing his glasses back up his nose. “Prop-osition” he repeated, saying it properly this time. “Will you listen to it? Please?” 

Oh, now there was a please? The kid hadn’t even said hello. Janus exhaled, running a hand through his hair, again fingering the raised scar on his cheek, eyes darting about without much hope for any sign of a frantic adult looking for their wayward offspring as he sat back, tapping his pen on the table. “I’m busy.”  

The boy’s eyes flashed. “No you’re not.”

Janus scoffed, gesturing to his papers. “I assure you that I a--”

“Are doing what you do every Friday. You’re not busy. You just sit here. All day. Reading. Writing.”  

Observant. Janus frowned, again glancing around for a guardian figure. He didn’t think children thought much beyond eating, sleeping, and playing with their peers. “That is considered being busy by most people, I don’t have time to tal--”  

The boy shifted to his knees, the golden sparks dancing around him as he carefully placed eight quarters on the table before pushing the pile over to him. “For your time.” He said, looking up to meet Jansus’s eyes once more.

Clever. Not quite the amount he usually took for a consultation, but he doubted a child could come up with that much cash. Still. It was the first time one of these golden sparked spawns of the devil decided to pay him instead of screaming bloody murder. 

Janus exhaled, laying down his pen, sitting up as he clasped his fingers together, resting his chin on them. “I’m listening.” Though he doubted anything good would come from this proposition. He could already predict the direction this would go.

The boy relaxed, though he stayed half kneeling on his chair. “I need you,” his mouth twisted slightly, grey eyes glittering. “to pretend to be my Father.” 

Father? Ha. Called it. “No.”

Golden sparks flared as the boy lifted his chin. “You didn’t even ask ‘Why.’”

He smirked, ignoring the sinking feeling in his stomach as he pushed the coins back. “I don’t need to.” It was obvious why the kid wanted to play pretend. After all, the sparks surrounding him were only visible to those like Janus. Single. Between the age of thirty and thirty-five. Childless. If the kid needed a fake dad...well this wasn’t his first rodeo with the concept. “You either need protection from some bullies, which--” He gestured to himself. “You think I look scary enough to intimidate them.” Though not scary enough to keep the kid from bugging him in the first place. “Or else you have lied to your friends about who your Dad is or what he does and so--”

“You’re wrong.”   

Janus cut off, tilting his head. “Am I?” He was certain he wasn’t. 

“You are.” The boy kept eye contact, grey blue eyes hard as stone. 

It would be an intimidating gaze once he grew older, Janus was sure. “Enlighten me.”

The boy pushed the coins back across the table. “The Aquarium is having a Father/Son day today. I want to go.” 

Not what he meant by enlighten, but he’d humor the kid. “So?”

The boy rolled his eyes, shifting to his knees so he could better rest his arms on the table. “I can’t exactly partisiis--partissee--par--” 

“Participate?”

He nodded. “I can’t exactly participate if I go by myself, dummy.”

Dummy? Who just helped the kid pronounce ‘participate?’ 

Janus shoved the quarters back to the boy before picking up his pen, tapping it against the table. He could see the kid’s problem though. It made sense why the aquarium wouldn’t want to let hordes of little demon spawn run around tapping on the glass, licking the floors, and breaking things unsupervised. “I’m not spending fifty dollars to play your Dad, kid, just so you can look at some fish.” 

A pet store would work just as well and wouldn’t cost a dime. If he was willing to go along with this.

Which he wasn’t.

He didn’t even like fish. Not since that stupid childhood fishing accident that had given him the lovely scar on his face in the first place.

No way would he willingly go along with some brat to a place filled to the brim with the creatures.

Despite how brilliant of a scheme it was. One Janus would have used himself though under different circumstances. 

Though he supposed, if he felt like admitting it, which he didn’t, but he still---it….hurt in a way, that the kid, even having the sparks, just wanted to use him to get in to see some boring fish instead of trying out a real Trial with him to see if they had any sort of parental bond. 

It was a stupid feeling. 

He should be used to being used. 

The boy adjusted his frames, barely blinking as he shoved the quarters back across the table, staring Janus down. “Adults get in for only ten dollars today. Kids get in free. If.” He emphasized the word. “Their Father brings them.” He shifted in his seat, pulling out a twenty and slid it across the table. “For your ticket.” He said simply, eyes flashing. “I’m only asking for your time. I don’t want to go on a Trial with you. I don’t need or want a Dad. I just need an adult with the time on his hands to pretend to be one and let me esplore the place for two measlely hours.”

Double ouch. At least some kids attempted to do an actual Trial Run with him to see if their sparks would Flare before being so blunt in telling him he wouldn’t be their Dad. 

Janus frowned, already shaking his head. “Kid, I don’t--” 

The boy pulled out another twenty, placing it on the table. “Two hours.” He said simply.  

“You don’t even know me--” Sure, he knew the boy knew he was in the Trial stage of life since the stupid floating sparks thing, even if he couldn’t see his own, went both ways. But that didn’t mean that he should just shove--

The boy placed a third twenty on the table. 

Janus exhaled, running a hand through his hair, again fingering his scar as he glared at the child. “You’re seriously bribing me? Where did you even get that much cash?” Hopefully it wasn’t stolen, but he’d applaud the boy for being so prolific in his thievery. 

“Not important.” The boy stated, pulling out a fourth twenty without breaking eye contact. 

Why was he being so persistent?! Any other child would have run away by now. 

“Why me?” He demanded, leaning forward, sneering in a way he knew made his eyes look even more creepy. “Why not bribe some other--”

The boy hesitated, a fifth twenty already in his fingers as his steely gazed wavered. “If I tell you why, will you go with me to the Aquarium?” 

That was hardly a fair exchange. The answer could be super simple and he’d be stuck with the kid for two hours. “I’m going to stick with my ‘I’m scary theory,’” Janus said instead, gesturing to his face. That was the usual reason kids gave in most circumstances. 

The boy frowned, lifting his chin. “I can be scary enough on my own without your help.” He said shoving the sleeve of his shirt up, revealing an angry red corded scar that wrapped around his arm from wrist to shoulder. “We match, kinda. Your scar looks similar. Makes it easier to pretend that you’re my Dad. That we were in the same accident.” He pushed the pile of money towards him. “And if anyone suspects you aren’t my birth father, then the sparks will show them that we’re on a Trial and that our scars mean we’re meant to be.” 

Meant to be. 

It took a lot of effort to not touch the crescent mark on his cheek. To ignore the fluttering in his chest at those words.

They’re just pretty little lies. 

Sure, there were ongoing theories that families all shared a similar trait that marked them. Whether that was having a mole on the same part of their stomach, sharing a taste in mustard, having an allergy to hay, hair having the same cowlick, or having similar looking scars--Janus kept his hands firmly on the table as he pulled his eyes back up to meet the kids. 

It was hearsay though. Nothing had ever been proven. Not when the sparks flaring between parent and child was a far more accurate indicator that they were meant to be a family. 

No, he highly doubted anyone would Flare with him during this five year tortrue period. Not even this kid despite the sparks dancing between them. 

Janus took a steadying breath. It was fine. He didn’t need a family. Not even a pretend one for two hours. He was better off alone now that Virgil had harred off to who knew where. “How long do I have to wait before you run out of twenties and give up?” He said, keeping his voice cool. “Because I’m not taking your bribe, kid, regardless of the amount. You’d be better off hiring a nanny or something.” 

Though he was curious just how much the boy thought it would take to convince him to go along with this farce. 

The kid made a face. “I don’t want to be coddled the entire time.” He snapped, the fifth twenty vanishing as he shoved his sleeve down. “All anyone ever does is treat me like I’m breakable since--” he gestured to his arm, the scars once more hidden. “And I’m sick of it. You look like you’d happily let me fall off a bridge if I wasn’t careful and I just...I just--” He shook his head. “I need to not be cared about for a bit.” 

Let him fall off a bridge? Ouch. Janus focused on relaxing his clenched hands, one finger at a time. “So you have a death wish? I’m not gonna be complacent to--”

The boy growled, slamming his hands on the table, steel grey eyes hardening even as they shimmered with unshed tears. “No. I just want to look at the fish.” He hissed. “I want to esplore. Learn. SEE. Without having a grown-up hovering over me like I’m freaking china. All you would have to do is stay near enough to keep any other metaling adults away. That’s all I want. For two hours. To be treated like a normal kid.” His hand clenched as he took a breath, bottom lip trembling. “I thought you of all people would understand that.” He whispered, eyes flickering to the scar and back.

It took a lot of effort to not touch his face. To maintain eye contact. 

Sure.

He understood. 

Janus had wasted years chasing that particular dream throughout high school and well into his first couple of years at college. 

It had all been for nothing. 

People judged the book by the cover. Few ever took the time to look deeper. 

And it sucked that Janus was being forced to reckon with the fact that if he didn’t go with this kid and pretend to be his Dad, he’d be like every other adult unwilling to give the boy a chance to be ‘normal.’  

…Great. Just. Great.  

He’d just been guilted into spending two hours looking at the fish. 

Janus broke eye contact, cursing under his breath as he shoved his papers into his book bag and stood, grabbing his jacket and hat off the chair. 

Maybe he should follow Virgil’s lead and disappear into the wilderness for the next four and a half years if the kids were going to start pulling this type of act on him. 

“You got a name, kid?” He asked, fishing out a single twenty from the stack before shoving the pile back at the boy. Enough for the ticket. That’s it. 

The boy caught his breath, eyes going wide. “You mean--”

How could eyes hard as steel one second go so soft like freshly fallen ash the next?

You know what. He didn’t want to know. If the kid knew how to do puppy dog eyes, then he knew how. That was that, but after today Janus would not be falling for them again.

“Name.” He repeated, impatiently gesturing for the boy to follow him as he tugged his hat down over his eyes. “Else I’ll make one up and I guarantee you will not like it.” 

The boy was by his side in a flash, golden sparks swirling. “Logan.” He said, adjusting his glasses with a small smile. “My name is Logan.”

[kyloswarstars]

ROOMMATES • Part 1

Divergent • College AU • Eric x Reader

ROOMMATES masterlist 💫 Divergent masterlist

You escaped your current living situation by moving in with your friend Christina – and five other college students. Little did you know that one of them was the guy who was your ultimate pain in the neck since your first semester. Now, you had to find a way to not strangle him in his sleep out of pure frustration. Also, you had to find a way to get rid of those weird butterfly feelings for him that slowly grew in your stomach.

Words • 2.4 k

The enemies to lovers story no one needed.

/////

It absolutely didn’t take you by surprise when your moving day turned out to be the hottest day of the year in Chicago. Not one single shadow spending cloud was to be seen, the temperatures felt like standing next to an actual volcano and your so called ‚friends‘ called off from helping one after one. It all got your blood boiling and made you want to throw your phone to the ground and stomp on it.

Instead you pushed it into the pocket of your pants, brushed some sweaty hair out of your face and continued unloading the first box out of the moving van you had rented.

Before you entered the building you would live in from today on, you took a good look at it. It was a rather spontaneous decision to move in. When you told your college friend, Christina, that your current living situation was very complicated, she offered you a free room in her apartment.

She was living with a lot of people. It would be eight people in total by tonight when you had moved in. For your liking, that was maybe a little bit too many roommates, but you rather took that, than live with your ex-boyfriend any longer.

You climbed up three flights of stairs and with each one the box in your hands got heavier. Knowing, that there were so many more boxes in the van that had to be brought up, made you want to sit down and have a beer already.

There was only one door on the third floor, which also appeared to be the last story of this building. That must be it. You rang the door bell and instantly heard some voices discuss about who would open the door.

A guy with some friendly eyes opened. „You must be Y/N!“ He stepped aside for you to enter the apartment. „I’m Uriah.“

„Are you on your own?“ You didn’t really get a proper chance to introduce yourself because Christina came rushing to Uriah’s side and gave you a brief hug, ignoring your sweaty body. She seemed truly offended by you being alone. Though, she was rather offended by your friends who weren’t there to help you even though they said they would.

You just shrugged and tried to take in the surroundings of your new home. Christina already told you that the apartment covered the whole story, therefore it had a lot of rooms that sheltered a lot of people.

It was a pretty opened concept. The big kitchen space flowed over into a living area and the other way around. Around the center piece, a huge dining table, were sitting three people, chatting the afternoon away. Christina and the guy, who had introduced himself as Uriah, joined the group again. She introduced you to Will, her boyfriend who you already knew from a lot of conversations, and the second couple in this apartment: Tris and Four.

„One roommate is missing, he’s… I don’t know where,“ said Christina and gestured for the remaining people to get up from their chairs. „Are we okay to help you with your stuff?“

She asked as if you had truly something to disagree with her offer. „You would be my life savers,“ you confessed. The help of your new roommates was genuine. The first bonding with them happened through carrying up your heavy boxes three flights of stairs, ranting over the heat and laughing about it because somehow you got along with them very well. Maybe after all the crap that had happened, this could be a good restart.

Christina offered to drive along with her car to the rental station and take you back to the apartment after dropping of the van. You didn’t have a car yourself and her offer was music in your ears. After that hot day and the physical exhaustion, you really didn’t want to ride your bicycle all the way from the rental place to your new home.

On your way back to the apartment, you asked Christina to stop at a pizza shop. You wanted to grab some dinner for your new roommates, and yourself, after they saved your ass with carrying your stuff all the way up to your new apartment.

When you placed the pizzas on the dining table, where everyone was still sitting at, every hesitation, if they had some at all about you moving in, was gone. Someone who brought pizza was very welcomed to move in.

Even though you were exhausted to your bones, the pizza gave you a small power boost, to continue with some more work after dinner. Before crashing on your mattress tonight, you wanted to unpack some of the stuff still. To your luck, Christina and Tris helped a little with your clothes and setting up a makeshift desk. At some point they left to go to bed. Way past midnight you felt your body giving out rapidly. You needed a shower. And sleep.

Right across from your room was the bathroom. There was still light in the hallway and you heard noises from the living area. The bathroom door was slightly open and you sleepily opened it completely to enter and shut it behind you.

The tiredness in your brain was suddenly gone when you faced a naked man getting out of the shower. You looked at him in shock and all you were able to say was: „What are you doing here?“

„What does it look like?“ He didn’t really hurry up to grab a towel and cover himself. There was too much time passing until a towel finally covered his lower half. Too much time for you to see, well, everything.

When the first shock subsided, you pulled yourself together, and looked at his face. This guy hadn’t been there all day. Still, you knew him.

„What are you doing here,“ you repeated your question in disbelief, this time with a small addition, though, „Eric?“

„I live here. What are you doing here?“

Fuck. No. Please not. „I guess we are roommates then,“ you stated in frustration.

„You are Christina’s friend moving in?“ He grabbed a second towel to dry his hair and looked at your from a weird angle. „Life’s just not fair to me.“

„Tell me about it.“

There you were. Standing in the small bathroom of your new apartment with Eric Coulter. Who lived here as well. You contemplated going back to the rental station immediately, get a van and remove your stuff before you unpacked completely. This was a nightmare. Since starting your first semester, Eric was the pain in your neck you were constantly clashing with. Whenever you started a constructive discussion about a topic, he was the one to drive you verbally crazy. There was no debate he missed and sometimes, you thought, he had taken it a personal mission to piss you off. Because even when he had the same opinion on something, he still had to prove you otherwise.

It had been dislike at first sight.

„Are you done in here then?“

„Why should I be?“ Eric’s discipline to make life more complicated for you was nothing you could deal with right now. Not after the day you had.

„Fine. Whatever,“ you mumbled. Instantly, you regretted opening the bathroom door – a shower had been so necessary – but dealing with Eric right now wasn’t worth it. The few steps across the hallway later, you stumbled over some of the boxes in your room, tripped and fell right on to your mattress. Grumbling, you turned around and saw Eric in the bathroom door inaudibly laughing at you. With your last energy, you slammed the door shut and collapsed back on the mattress. His stupid, grinning face was the last you had in mind before falling into a deep sleep.

/////

The next morning, after sleeping like a baby, you made sure to first take a glance into the bathroom before entering. No Eric. You locked the door, undressed and breathed out in relief when the water hit your skin. The warm water washed away all of yesterdays sweat, soaked your hair and made you feel like a human again.

The water temperature suddenly changed from hot to freezing. Hearing the toilet flush go off indicated why. You peaked out from behind the shower curtain and saw Eric readjust his boxer shorts.

„I locked the door!“ You whisper-screamed at him.

Eric went to wash his hands. At least you’re washing your hands, you thought. „I had to pee.“ He winked at you, left the bathroom and turned the lock into position again when he was back in the hallway. Great, not even a lock can keep him out.

With fresh clothes and still wet hair, you made your way for the kitchen. Your roommates were gathered at the huge dining table, Eric included, and had an awesome looking breakfast. It was ten on a Sunday morning, you didn’t expect all of them to be up yet.

Some ‚good mornings‘ welcomed you and assigned you the seat right across from Eric. Of course.

„How did you sleep?“ Christina poured you a coffee and tried to add milk and sugar but you were able to fetch it from here while it was still black.

„Good,“ you answered with a ‚thank you‘.

„This is Eric, by the way. The roommate you didn’t meet yesterday.“

Your glance went from her bright eyes to Eric, who stared at you like he had only now registered you sitting across from him. „We had the pleasure already,“ you stated and took a long sip, not breaking eye contact with him.

He was the first one to look away, which made you sink back in your chair with a winning grin on your lips.

During breakfast your roommates instructed you on how this living together worked. Who cleaned when and what, what team is when doing the weekly grocery haul and why you don’t flush the toilet when someone is taking a shower. When Uriah mentioned that, you turned your head to Eric and caught his glance. He didn’t seem to be impressed by your death stare.

Christina offered to help again with unpacking after breakfast. Still within the second she closed the door to your room, she popped the question. „Do you and Eric know each other?“

You groaned. „Kinda,“ you said as you turned to look at her. „Do you remember me constantly complaining about a guy in one of my classes who’s always driving me crazy?“

„That’s Eric?“ Christina’s face went blank and her jaw dropped. She flung the door open and entered, without knocking, the room next to yours – Eric’s room. You could hear his voice telling her to get out and knock the next time. Christina replied something but you couldn’t understand it. Was she telling him to stop his bullshit debates with you, now that you were living here? You couldn’t tell, even though you pressed an ear to the wall. They were both talking, but too quietly for you to understand a word.

You still wondered about that incident a week later. Christina just didn’t come back after bursting into Eric’s room. And he wasn’t to be seen ever since. Like he had just vanished. Which he didn’t because you could hear him come into his room late at night and leave it early in the mornings. Summer break meant he didn’t leave for classes and it bugged you that you even thought about this so much. You shouldn’t care. At all.

You did care.

„Chris?“ You knocked on hers and Will’s door. Will answered to ‚come in‘. You opened their door and only saw him laying on the floor in front of a fan. The heat was still very prominent. Instead of asking where Christina was, you asked him if he was fine.

„Totally fine. Just very hot.“

„Same,“ you replied, regretting it a little to not having asked Christina if there was air conditioning in the apartment before you moved in.

„Christina is out with Uriah. Doing the weekly grocery haul. Uriah jumped in for me,“ Will rolled around to lay on his stomach and looked at you with a dramatic expression on his face, „I just couldn’t. Too. Hot.“

With an amused smile you closed the door again and went to the kitchen to get some more water. Even though it was summer break, you still did a lot for college. There was a study you had engaged in and wanted to work on further. Sitting back down at your desk, you lost yourself in analysing the newest data that had come in.

You didn’t know for how long he stood there in silence until you noticed him. Eric leaned in your opened doorframe and observed what you were doing. You turned to him in your chair.

„Can I help you with something, Mr. Invisible?“ You really really wanted to know if you had done something wrong for him to disappear so completely from the apartment. Within the next second, all the exhausting memories of debates with him came back and you were feeling a little less guilty. Still, you wanted to know.

„Just wanted to let you know that, whatever Christina might have told you, is not true.“

„What’s that supposed to mean?“

„That it’s not true.“

„What is not true?“

„My reasons for always debating with you.“ Eric’s look was puzzled and he tried to understand the confusion on your face. Or his own confusion. Then his eyes widened a little. „Wait, she didn’t talk to you?“

„Talk to me about why you’re such a pain in my neck? No!“ You wished she would’ve. For the last week you had tried to question her about that incident but she always managed to change the topic. Wait… „What are those reasons?“

„There are no reasons. And if there are any,“ he grew uncomfortable, „they are just not true.“

„You confuse me,“ you stated.

„Great,“ Eric replied. „At least once I managed to do that after never being able to do so in our debates.“ He left. Just left and let you sit in your room with a thousand question marks in your head.

Christina wouldn’t get a single minute of peace when she got home. Not until she told you what had happened a week ago. Even if you had to kidnap her on your bike to a donut shop and sugar-shock her to get information. You would get information. That was for sure.

/////

to be continued

[666dmtrscu]

Nocturne (Part I)

Cassandra x maiden

Summary: A retelling of the last hours between two lovers. Oh fate, fate, fate. // In other words, sad hours for Cassandra and her beloved.

//

Cassandra Dimitrescu was not one to hesitate, but for some reason she could not make her hand, that was now resting on the doorknob, move in a twisting motion. It wasn't hard to open a door now, was it? Especially for someone like herself. So why couldn't she just open the door to the maidens' room?

She tried moving her hand once more, but to no avail. What was wrong with her? All of a sudden, Cassandra Dimitrescu was hesitating to enter her partner's room. The same room she had entered, exited, and stayed in so many times before.

To think it has only been eight delicious years... It didn't feel like it was enough.

...

Should she even wake Luna in the first place?

By Miranda — and speak of the devil— how silly of her to even ask herself that, of course she should. She had to.

Shaking herself out of her thoughts, she gathered the courage to finally twist the doorknob and quickly step inside the room, the door shutting behind her with a soft click.

The room was dimly lit by the dying fireplace on the other side; it was getting cold as well. Cassandra considered reigniting the fire, but she knew it wouldn't be necessary. Time was running out.

As soon as her eyes landed on the figure sleeping away, she dreaded what was to come next.

Upon silently reaching the bed, she hesitated again. Not knowing what to do with herself, she decided to sit at the edge of the bed and stare at how the maiden's chest rose and fell with every breath. She stayed like this for some time, entranced with how the other woman looked so striking and peaceful at the same time. Even as she dreamed, she was mesmerizing. She let her gaze travel down the maiden's body and hummed appreciatively at how the sheets accentuated her curves. Get it together, she told herself. There was a time for such things, and now was not it. Instead, she took the maiden's hand in hers and caressed the back of it with her thumb.

“Luna,” she whispered softly, using her free hand to lightly shake the woman. It took her several tries, but finally woke her from a seemingly very deep sleep.

Always such a heavy sleeper.

She was going to give the maiden an apologetic smile, until she remembered the reason why she had come to wake her in the first place.

The maiden groaned and shifted in place, finding the hand that was caressing hers and giving it a gentle squeeze as a way of greeting. She sat up and groggily mumbled something to the other woman, who held back a snort and asked her to repeat herself. Giving her a faux look of annoyance, she repeated her words clearly enough this time. The hoarseness of her voice almost made Cassandra shiver.

“I said,” started the maiden, enunciating every word slowly and clearly. “Why on earth are you waking me up this late in the night?”

Instead of giving an immediate reply, the brunette pondered over the question and tried to come up with the best- no, the most gentle way to deliver the blow. As futile as it may sound to other ears. She came to the conclusion that there simply was no way around it.

Not anymore.

It wasn't as if the maiden had not been told, but for Cassandra, neither her or her family were sure of when or how it would all occur. Everything was happening too fast and too soon. This train of thought brought a frown upon her features and induced the same hollow feeling in her chest that she had felt far too many times in the past four hours.

There was no other way of saying it.

“It is time,” said the vampire to the maiden.

How fast three words could change the entire atmosphere of a room was beyond her. The maiden's silence however, was heavier than anything else in that moment. Not even the gnawing image of Mother Miranda engraved in her mind made Cassandra feel as much fear and anguish as she did in those almost eternal moments of silence. She was about to fall back into her misfortunate thoughts until the maiden's voice, uneven and unbelievably small, broke the silence.

“What?”

The same hollow feeling returned and Cassandra couldn't bring herself to look the maiden in the eye. Instead she focused on the hand she held in hers. “Mother received a call-”

“Oh.”

It clicked. She knew, she understood.

Once again, silence fell heavily over the two.

Both Cassandra and the maiden had rued the day the glass globe they lived in would be shattered. By the person who had provided it in the first place, no less. Contrary to popular belief, the maiden did not feel trapped in Castle Dimitrescu. Not when she first arrived, not when she first looked into wickedly beautiful golden eyes, and especially not now with the woman who sat before her with a haunting look written all over her face.

Before coming to the castle, she had been alone, abandoned and forgotten, all because of something as trivial and innocent as a kiss in broad daylight. She had come with the promise of death, which in some way, was fulfilled. She was an entirely different person now. So no, she did not feel trapped or scared in the cold embraces of her lover, nor inside the great, big place that reeked of death.

In fact, she felt the exact opposite. A sane person would become insane the moment they knew her and the others had willingly decided to stay in such a place and fall in love of all things. But she felt like she belonged, like there was no need to run anymore. She felt loved, she felt wanted. She felt free knowing her new family wouldn't judge her for who she was. She felt... at home. She was home.

But now she had to leave.

Cassandra's voice broke through the silence and the maiden's train of thought.

“You should get ready, Lu,” she said in a somber tone as she stood from her spot on the edge of the bed and slowly made her way to the fireplace. She fiercely rubbed her hands together as she kneeled in front of it. “There isn't much time.”

Wordlessly, the maiden complied. She gathered her belongings quietly and swiftly, although she tried to not make it seem like she wanted to leave. She would very much rather stay and she supposed she could, if things were any different. If they had more time... Luna grimaced at the reminder. Time seemed to slip into every thought and conversation lately. 

The thorn on everyone's side.

———

Her clothes for the situation at hand were not so different from her usual. Certainly more suited to run or fight in if necessary. While she would normally wear a white sundress or a white blouse with trousers, now she wore a suit of sorts, devoid of color. In another life, she might have been an assassin of sorts. The thought almost made her chuckle.

Her, an assassin or a warrior? Please, not now and not ever. She couldn't even hurt a fly. Literally.

She should, however, wear black more often. It brought out the silver in her eyes in a way that was almost haunting.

Checking in the mirror for wrinkles that she already knew weren't there, she let out a shaky breath. She looked to her bedroom door. One step out of that door and there was no turning back.

“Cass?”

When there was no immediate response, Luna turned hesitantly to look at her lover, who now seemed to tense slightly and take massive interest in dusting off the bookshelf.

“Cassandra.”

“Yes, dear?” The Dimitrescu now fixed her gaze on a single book.

The maiden's eyes snapped to her hands, which were reflexively flexing. It was a nervous tick of hers, she knew. Despite her controlled exterior and sharp gaze, it was always the smaller hints that gave her away. She was just as anxious and upset. “Can I ask you something?”

“Of course.”

“You're going to live, right?”

Cassandra all but snapped her head in the maiden's direction, her eyes blown momentarily wide. As her features softened, she let out a saddened melodic laugh. “Luna Samos, your life is currently at great risk and yet, you ask if I am going to live through this?”

“Obviously.”

“Why,” she asked incredulously as she crossed her arms. There was a faint shimmer in her eyes that would go unnoticed if it weren't the maiden who she was talking to.

The maiden almost replied with an equally incredulous tone when a knock came to the door and a voice called out from the other side.

“Cassandra,” said the brunette's younger sister, Daniela, with a hint of uncertainty.

Cassandra refused to wipe whatever tears were starting to form. Instead, she maintained eye contact with the maiden and cleared her throat before replying.

“What is it?”

“Mother wanted to remind you that we should hurry.”

The other woman let out a defeated sigh. “Five minutes, Dani.”

A tsk was the response and then she was gone.

The two women stayed looking into each other's eyes intensely for a minute or two. Both were very stubborn, that they knew, but they also knew there wasn't enough time.

After finding her voice, the maiden broke the silence first.

“There is too much I want to say. To you, about us. About," she gestured wildly with her hands in the air. "Tonight. About yesterday, about tomorrow, about the day after tomorrow. About everything, Cassandra.”

She tore her gaze away from her dark clad lover. If it was any other night, she mused, they would have been matching for an occasion such as a date.

“I know,” said the brunette turning to face the window, arms still crossed.

Cassandra never looked and sounded so defeated. The maiden wondered what it was that she was looking out to.

“I don't know where to begin.”

“Then don't begin at all.”

“But I want to,” the maiden continued.

Cassandra stayed looking out the window for a moment. When she finally turned, her pale cheeks were already streaked with red, but when she spoke her voice was firm. “The thing is, you don't have to, I already know,” she said. “Eight years... we might as well be married. So you don't need to say it. I will always know.”

The maiden had already moved to embrace Cassandra by the time she finished.