#stede and ed need couple friends

[futuremrscameron]

ed's friendship with anne and mary was so adorable

just look at them

[jellybeanium124]

ed having a panic attack in public and everyone is ignoring him until stede walks over and asks him if he wants a boba tea and holds out a cup of boba for him and it's just surprising enough to snap ed out of it a little and a sugary drink helps too. stede just talks with him and helps him feel better and they end up sorta going on a date.

once ed's brain has calmed down enough to start really thinking again he gets nervous about stede having bad intentions. his whole life, showing weakness meant someone was going to swoop in and try and take advantage of him, so that must be what stede's doing, right? ed's always been surrounded by manipulative assholes. but then their maybe-date is coming to a natural conclusion, and stede says goodbye without even asking for ed's number. and ed's pretty confused. he also really likes this sweet guy. so he asks stede for his number before he walks out of ed's life forever, and stede seems really surprised by ed asking to swap contact info. ed figures if this guy is trying to manipulate him into sleeping with him he's really laying it on thick.

stede doesn't even text him first. ed's so desperate for a connection he doesn't even care if this is fake and stede just wants to get in his pants. if he can keep pretending to be nice and funny ed almost doesn't mind (like he's ever gonna get any better? he doesn't deserve any better). so he texts stede and they meet up for lunch or something and then walk around the park and stede doesn't make any romantic advance at all. ed's having a hard time holding onto the belief that stede has some master manipulation plan at this point, but he can't quite let it go because then that would mean this wonderful lunatic is actually real and that feels too good to be true.

ed kisses him, just a quick peck when they're out of sight of everyone else. he really wants to kiss stede, but he's also worried stede will ghost him if he doesn't put out. but stede looks so completely gobsmacked after ed's stuck having to recalibrate.

"did you mean to do that?" stede asks.

"yes? erm... sorry?"

"no no don't apologize! I was just surprised!"

"oh... why were you surprised?"

stede falters and goes kind of quiet. little does ed know what's really been going through stede's head this whole time.

stede saw someone suffering, and reached out, because he knows how it feels to suffer alone and nobody ever reaches out. and then the man he gave some bubble tea to ends up being really cute and smart and funny and cool and so much cooler than stede. he's a million miles out of stede's league and stede's just happy that ed wanted to spend a couple hours with him.

he's prepared to just walk away after because he did his nice thing, and then probably undid all the niceness by blabbering on and annoying ed. he's shocked when ed asks for his number. why would ed want to contact him again? he hopes ed isn't having panic attacks alone enough to need to call a total stranger to ground him. but then ed asks him out to lunch? it's pretty odd. maybe ed just wants to reach out to him once or twice to prove something about exchanging contact info and then ed will probably get fed up with him or forget about him and move on. but stede accepts because he can at least pretend to have a friend for a week or two. and then ed wants to take a walk together after lunch which is just so kind of him. and then ed KISSES him???????????? stede really doesn't know what to make of that. he hopes ed isn't just pretending to like him enough to kiss him. that hasn't happened to him since high school. adults don't play those kinds of pranks, right?

stede really isn't prepared to get into all that immediately and just blurts out: "because you're so out of my league!"

"I'm out of your league? be serious stede. you're handsome and kind and witty and fun... you're out of my league."

"well if you're out of my league and I'm out of your league... that sort of evens things out doesn't it?"

"yeah guess it does!"

and then they can kiss again and not care about any passers-by seeing them <3 maybe one day they can trauma dump about their minuscule self-esteem and get therapy. but for now they are just two sad lonely little guys who found each other and it's the start of something lovely.

[piratecaptainscaptainpirates]

Ed and Stede are such a couple to have exactly zero boundaries between them. They eat off each other's plates and at restaurants they only order one milkshake so they can share. Don't even need to ask before borrowing each other's clothes because they're both visibly delighted about it. Never close the bathroom door. Forget that it's not appropriate to just loudly go "hey, I forgot to ask, how's that lump on your bum feeling this morning?" in the middle of lunch with friends

[amuseoffyre]

Since insomnia is kicking my arse of late, I naturally tilted into the thoughts about the nature of the 3-act structure and why S2 of OFMD may have felt off and incomplete to a lot of people.

I am fully in agreement that we lost a lot of valuable time with only 8 episodes and a lot of it did feel rushed, but for the amount of story and set-up and growth and development they needed to fit into 4 hours of television, they did astonishing things.

DJenks has said from the very start that this is a story that has been planned out to take 3 seasons. It's literally a 3-act play and we are currently right in the middle of the worst part of that timeline according to every traditional 3-act structure.

Act one/season one is self-explanatory. Like New Hope in the Star Wars Trilogy or Fellowship of the Ring, this is the set-up. We're introduced to our protagonists and antagonists, the relationships are given a foundation.

The beginning is Stede's journey to becoming a real boy. The inciting incident, the one that actually pushes his change beyond "playing pirates" is meeting Ed. The second thoughts come together in episode 8/9 after his confrontations with Jack and Chauncey and episode 10 is the climax.

Act 2/season 2 is never going to be as smooth and simple as act 1/s1. A big part of the A2/S2 job is set up for A3/S3 and this is what we're seeing and why a lot of story threads seem to have been left dangling.

Again, to call back to Empire Strikes Back and The Two Towers, the structure is much the same: the original batch of people are divided and scattered, the big enemy from A1/S1 is looming, new allies make themselves known. In SW, this meant the introduction of Lando and Yoda as allies plus the hint of the Emperor lurking in the background. In LotR, we have the Rohirrim, Gondor and the Ents as allies and the expansion of Sauron's forces in Helm's Deep, Osgiliath and the winged wraiths.

There's a clear trajectory following the A2/S2 structure:

obstacle 1 - the crews separated and struggling

obstacle 2 - the end of episode 2 and the repercussions of his actions

twist - just when things start to settle, the Ned Low situation happen and Stede kills for the first time

obstacle 3 - Ed's struggle with his identity leading to him leaving

disaster - Ricky's assault on the Republic

crisis - do-or-die battle because they have no other choice

climax - the last 15 minutes of ep. 8 live here.

As with SW and LotR, there's an ending, but weighted with the knowledge of a story that is meant to continue. Each of those act 2 films end with the heroes still aware of the looming threat, some of them heading out on new missions, and some of them resting and healing. There's brief pause, brief respite, a moment to take a breath.

We have all the characters in place now and the battle-lines have been drawn. Luke still needs to confront Vader (I see you, impending Ed and Hornigold confrontation), Frodo still needs to destroy the ring, Aragorn still needs to lead the army against the Black Gate, the second Death Star is still hanging in the sky.

I'm so excited to see what S3 brings because we have so many arcs ready to go: Zheng's vengeance trip, the inevitable enforced out-of-retirement arc for Ed and Stede, Hornigold, Ricky trying to maintain his tenuous control of the republic given how many of his people were killed when the crew escaped, the pirate rebellion gathering forces.

Also how often do we get shows/films where the supporting cast are given this much storyline? We have a named/speaking-role cast of upwards of 15 central characters. That is a staggering amount of people to work with, when most shows would only focus on the leads and a couple of their friends. Six is the average for most TV shows, while comedies can inch higher because ensembles, but most ensembles don't get as much as our crew did.

I know a lot of people aren't happy about Izzy's death. I know I would have liked to see him a lot more, because he's such a grumpy old bitch and I love him and him affectionately roasting Ed and Stede would have made my entire month. But I'm also aware that narratively, as a figurehead of the old ways of piracy and "we were Blackbeard", it was a symbolic death as well - a sign of the death of the old ways of piracy and of Blackbeard as was.

(Also, they Obi-Wanned him. I'm not over that. Gave him the "if you strike me down I will become more powerful" speech. I'm just... guys, your star wars nerdery is showing XD)

So while it was flawed in places and pacing, given the scale of the story they're telling, the number of pieces and characters they had in play, and the arcs they have been setting up while also still keeping the humour, I am giving a standing ovation for a remarkable piece of work.

[brigdh]

Ed and the mortifying ordeal of being known

Ed does not like revealing his feelings. He is incredibly consistent about lying,

hiding

displacing,

distracting, or just outright denying what he's feeling instead of actually talking about it. This is a consistent pattern of behavior with him. There are a few exceptions – most significantly, I think, the bathtub scene where he confesses to Stede about killing his father – but they are a) rare, and b) occur under unusual circumstances, such as a PTSD flashback. In general Ed goes to great lengths to prevent people from recognizing the truth about him.

I don't really blame Ed for this habit, to be clear. He went through an abusive childhood, and though we don't see a lot of the exact dynamics in baby Ed's house, it's very common for abused children to become hyper vigilant of both their own and others' emotions. It's an attempt to exert some, any control they can over the situation, as though they can prevent setting off the abuser if they just always say and do the right thing.

Ed escaped into piracy, but in terms of talking about his feelings, I don't think it was much of an escape. Piracy in OFMD seems to be a place where the idea of having friends (though not the reality – I'd argue Ed might not use the word 'friend', but has had close relationships) is to be scoffed at. "We're all just in various stages of fucking each other over!" says Calico Jack, and being open about your emotions, plans, hopes, etc would just make it all the easier to be betrayed. On the other hand, lying, obfuscating, or just telling everyone about Plan A and then instead pulling off Plan B makes you look like a double-crossing genius who outthought everyone around you. So I'm not surprised that's Ed's learned to be manipulative and uncommunicative. I don't think he's ever been in a situation where emotional openness wouldn't be a disadvantage.

Regardless of why he does this, it's very clear that it's a pattern of behavior for him. This is one reason why I don't think Sad Robe Ed back in Episode 10 was healing – healing requires addressing and dealing with your feelings, and Ed was very much not doing that. I've already written a whole post going through that episode and laying out how Ed never once mentions Stede, or love, or heartbreak, or anything related to what he's going through, so I'm not going to do it again here. In brief, Ed's putting on a performance of sadness for the crew, but it's a generic, vague sort of sadness, without any connection to his personal, specific pain.

Who finally brings up Stede in Ep 10? It's sure not Ed. Izzy:

Which brings us to Season Two. How is Ed doing now?

He's once again making a performance of his pain, and once again keeping it vague, not letting any of his true, personal hurts be revealed.

These:

Are performances of his pain and sadness, but just like before, they're generic, unspecific. This is "Mad Devil Pyrate Blackbeard", not heartbroken, human Ed. Who is it that brings up the private reality of what's causing this toxic atmosphere? Once again, not Ed. It's Izzy, just like before. And this time he gets shot immediately for saying Stede's name, and Ed doesn't even look at him.

In all three episodes, Ed mentions Stede directly only once, and very pointedly, it's when he's alone:

I'm glad Ed has decided that he wants to live, but that's the beginning of a journey, not the end. What I really want to see in the next couple of episodes is Ed finally, for once, opening up. He doesn't want to be vulnerable, but the lack of emotional intimacy that constantly lying and performing has gotten him is, quite literally, killing him.

Ed can't get over his own, very real pain until he's willing to admit that it exists. I want to see him acknowledge where he hurts. He needs friends. He needs love. He can't get those without being honest.

I hope he does. I hope the show will have him do this work instead of skipping him ahead immediately to the happy ending, no behavioral change required. I think they will. It's kind of their motto, after all: talk it through as a crew.

Now if the co-captains would just follow their own advice...

[candied-cae]

Okay... I finished OFMD S2...

And yeah, as much as it breaks my heart, this season disappointed me in so many different ways. There are a few things I absolutely adored, but a lot of it felt like a disservice to a lot of the work S1 did to establish the universe and its characters.

Oluwande gave Stede advice like one whole time this season, even though that was a big part of the first. Him consistently being supportive was such a light, and it was pretty much replaced with him just being generally bubbly (and I fucking loved watching him be bubbly and joyful, might I add, but it's different).

Jim's complicated relationship with the idea of taking vengeance wasn't brought up at all. Jim's relationship with Oluwande was absolutely shifted, even now, I cannot watch S1 with the knowledge that they're going to be played off as "best friends who hooked up once" and see it, they HAD to have been intended as an endgame couple in the beginning.

Frenchie didn't sing even once, despite the fact that the very first scene opens to his voice! Frenchie as a character was shrunken a ton, in general. Ed leaned on him a lot in S1, that was gone. Wee John was shown as his best friend, but how many words did they even exchange this season? They let him do another grift, but it didn't include Oluwande so (personally) it felt cheapened.

Wee John didn't make a single fucking joke about fire! Even though there was a lot of fire this season, and he made like three separate comments about arson in the previous one?!?!?! And, again, he barely even talks to Frenchie at all!

The Swede was benched for half the episodes, Buttons became a bird halfway through and possibly won't be coming back at all, Ivan was killed off with a one-liner, and Izzy died as a completely backwards version of himself that we were given almost no show of him transitioning into.

Izzy, who practically stole a bunch of other character's "moments" while they rushed through his redemption so they could kill him at the end and hope they got everyone attached to him enough to care. Izzy got to sing, Izzy got to play advisor to Stede, Izzy got to do drag with John, Izzy whittled a gift for Lucius instead of Pete, Izzy pretty much interrupted every single scene Gentlebeard had... It's just... frustrating.

Season 1 was revolutionary to me, but Season 2 just felt far more average in comparison. I don't know, I was so excited, and rewatching season 1 is still exhilarating, but season 2 just doesn't do as much for me. I really feel like it was the wrong choice to spend as much time as they did with Izzy when they still skipped almost the entirety of his "redemption," condense so many of the other characters to make for time, but still make sure we could fit in some incredible jokes.

One of the only things that didn't change for me, was the humor.

But about half of my favorite things just didn't exist these last 8 episodes, so I need to go drown myself in some fanfics.

[gottagobackintime]

I find it fascinating to witness the straight audience of any media not being able to pick up what the makers of the movie/show puts down.

It’s like when people reacted to the “You wear fine things well” scene in Our Flag Means Death with “aw, they’re such good friends” whereas the queer audience went “omg, this is happening”. We all had access to the same scene, we’d all watched the build up to that scene but the straight audience wrongly read it as friends/straight whereas the queer audience had suspected they were building up to a romance but this was the confirmation. Even the creator of the show was baffled that people were surprised that Ed and Stede fell in love. Because he thought they had made it obvious.

And as I said, we, the queer audience picked up on it. And I feel like the same thing is happening with Ted Lasso. Do I know that Ted and Trent will get together? No, I am unfortunately not a writer on Ted Lasso. But you can’t deny that there are clues pointing to it. But the straight audience barely pick up the fact that Ted and Trent like each other, be that in a platonic way or romantic way. I’ve seen several reactions to the last episode of season 2 and ONE of them included the scene where Ted reacts to Trent not being in the press room. All of them severely cut down the scene in the parking lot. One of the scenes most of us Ted/Trent truthers point to as a huge piece of evidence for it going canon. The parallel of them meeting in an empty parking lot, just like Ted and his ex-wife and Roy and Keeley. But because Ted and Trent are both men it couldn’t possibly mean anything. And Ted has an ex-wife and a kid so he can’t possibly be into men, as if there is no such thing as being bisexual. “But I’m pretty sure Trent has a family, he has a kid right?” So? He could be divorced, we also have no idea if his daughter has another dad or a mum. And the same thing applies to him, it doesn’t mean he can’t be into men (take also into account all of James Lance’s interviews, and his choice of shirt in one of them, friend of Dorothy anyone? He's the captain of this ship, we're just along for the ride tbh.)

Then we have the wonderful “I’m so not homophobic, in fact, you are homophobic because you think Ted is gay just because he likes musicals and has ‘feminine’ traits” um no… it’s the fact that he kind of acts in a way that an ally wouldn't. Yeah, he called himself an ally in that one episode. But every single person who is now out as queer who at one point considered themselves an ally because "I’m not one of them but I sure think they're neat" raise a hand 🖐️ (been there, done that. Was very into queer things before I realised I myself am one of them). What it always comes down to is "it's pandering", "it's tokenism" (having the main character on the show be queer wouldn't be fucking tokenism), "not everything has to be gay", "why can't men just be friends, there is a severe lack of male friendships on tv". And like the last one makes me go??? There are a MILLION friendships between men on TV. There are even multiple friendships between men in Ted Lasso. Beard and Ted, Ted and Higgins, Ted and Roy, the himbos and so on. Having Ted and Trent become a couple wouldn't really change anything because there are still friendships between men. They also claim that Ted is needed as the "straight without toxic masculinity" representation. As if Beard isn't right there. The man who has no problem going to an immersive show about the menstrual cycle. Has no problem with shrieking when he's surprised and so on.

I also like that if we'd get Ted and Trent together, we'd get two middle aged queer dads. Which isn't that common. It's not even super common to see people realising they're queer late in life on TV, and yet it happens every day. Because let's face it, most queer men on TV kind of look like Colin, and I don't mean that as a bad thing. And I'm looking forward to his storyline. But it's also nice seeing middle aged or old people finding themselves and being allowed to be who they are (see Ed and Stede from OFMD). Also would enjoy seeing people lose their minds when they realise they've been fooled this entire time. It'll be like Black Sails all over again.

I do not have any doubts about the fact that, had Trent or Ted been a woman and they saw Trent give up his career because of Ted's influence, they sure as hell wouldn't protest people thinking they'd become a couple. But because it's two men it's just delusional for some reason (homophobia).

What I'm saying is, it's clear that the straight audience has a hard time picking up subtext and clues that the makers are planting. Because they've never had to do that. Because they are always clearly represented. They don't have to look for minor side characters and hope that they might be queer. Because the main character is straight and most of the supporting cast too. When you've grown up with a lack of representation or with representation that is meant to be subtext, you'll learn to pick up on it. And you do look at media differently. I just wish that the straight audience could listen to us for once, without getting defensive and dancing around the fact that they are uncomfortable relating to a character that turned out to be queer.

[dragon-kazansky]

Spirit of the sea

Izzy Hands x Reader (GN)

You were a member of Blackbeard's crew long ago. Then you became a ghost story. Izzy Hands only sees you in his dreams these days, until he sees you for real when investigating Stede Bonnet. This sets him on a rollercoaster of emotions between you and what his captain is doing.

{Masterlist}

{Previous Chapter} - {Next Chapter}

Warnings: Calico Jack. Sad Izzy. Sad you.

Chapter Seven - Blind Man's Cove

♡♡♡

Izzy sits in Spanish Jackie's bar. He had just made a deal with the British Navy to hand over Stede Bonnet. When the Navy left, Izzy was left to sit on his own at the back of the bar. He had his head in his hand, his hair messed up from where he had ran his fingers through it. In his other hand was the ring he wore around his neck. It felt heavy in his palm.

"Be safe," he whispers.

He stared at the little piece of jewellery and then closed his fingers around it, closing his eyes for a moment. God, he wishes you had come with him. He wanted to mend the damage done from 6 years apart. He wanted to be able to look at you and feel normal again.

Stupid fucking Stede Bonnet.

And yet, it was because of Bonnet they found you again. Still, he needed to get rid of the man. He needed his Blackbeard back.

He just hoped you would find it in your heart to forgive him what he had done.

♡♡♡

It was late at night. You had fallen asleep in Izzy's old bed once again. Lucius had been earlier to check on you as he done every night so far.

You had only just drifted off to sleep when you heard voices. One of them was definitely Edward. He sounded excited.

Sighing, you sat up. "What is he doing?"

You get up out of bed and make your way up onto the deck. What you see was not what you were expecting. No fucking way was Calico Jack onboard the Revenge.

"Fuck off."

At the sound of your voice both Jack and Edward turn around. Ed looks beyond excited.

"Look who found us! Jack, Calico Jack!" Ed grins.

Jack grins too, but his is more of a smirk than a smile. "Long time no see. Last I heard, you were a spirit haunting the waters."

"Yeah, that... that's just a story," you say. "What the fuck are you doing here?"

"Came to see ya both, didn't I?" Jack drapes an arm around your shoulders and guides you back toward Edward. "Three pals back together again! Just like old times."

♡♡♡

Stede wakes up to the sound of cannon fire. He comes up deck to find you leaning back against the railing as Edward and Jack have their fun. The rest of the crew are present too.

"What's going on? Who are we attacking?"

"Hey! Shit, did we wake you?" Ed asks. Jack and himself had been drinking for a couple hours by this point. "Shot, sorry, we were a bit too loud."

"I mean... cannons are loud," you mutter, taking a swig of your own drink.

"We were blowing stuff up. I just got laid a visit by my old ship mate, Calico Jack."

"OK... um... Old mate? Well, if he's a friend of yours, hello." Stede greets.

"Who's the big gal?" Jack asks.

"Would you fuckin' stop?" Ed playfully shoves him. They both laugh. "He's joking. He's fuckin' joking. You're not a girl."

You take another swig from your bottle as you watch the exchange.

"Jack, Stede Bonnet. Stede Bonnet, Jack."

"Good to meet you." Stede shakes Jack's hand. "So, er, what are we blowing up?"

Edward goes on to explain they had found and old chest of drawers. Stede comments that it was an old family heirloom, but he shakes it off as if he wanted to blow it up anyway.

He promptly invites Edward to breakfast, where Jack tags along. Stede doesn't look too pleased, but rolls with it.

You decide to take your bottle of rum over to the nearest steps and sit down. Lucius spots you and makes his way over, pulling a face.

"Rough night?"

"Didn't sleep much." You tell him, lowering the rum bottle from your lips. Lucius reaches out and takes it from you. You hadn't drank as much as the other two had, but Lucius wanted to stop you from drinking any more anyway.

"Wanna talk about it?"

"What's left to talk about? I miss him, okay..."

"What's the deal with Jack?" He asks.

"He's Ed's mate."

"Go on," Lucius urges.

"He's a bit of a wild card. Crazy shit will happen while he's here, for the record. He brings out some of the crazy in Blackbeard."

"Okay. Anything else?"

You sigh and look at him. "He was a drunken fling. That what you wanna hear? It happened once, never again."

Lucius grins. "Feels good to get out in the open though, right?"

"I don't know how that information makes amy difference to anything," you say, burrowing your brows in confusion.

"It doesn't, I just wanted to hear you open up. See, you're learning it ways. You're one of us."

You laugh softly.

♡♡♡

Lucius spent a good portion of the morning with you, Pete joining you both at some point. You were enjoying your time with them chatting and sharing stories. Pete shared of his made up stories about his time on Blackbeard's crew. You found amusement in them and Pete seemed proud you liked them.

When Edward and Jack returned to deck, Jack had his whip at the ready. Edward at up some bottles along the railing of the ship.

"What are they doing?" Pete asked, watching the two men.

"Whippies."

Calico Jack was a master of the whip. The crew cheered as he broke each bottle without missing a beat. You can't deny his skill, no matter what you may think of the man.

Stede looks rather horrified.

"Whippies! Whippies! Whippies!" Everyone starts cheering.

Jack whips the cards from Swede's hand.

"The guy's an absolute legend with a whip." Ed laughs.

"How long's he staying, do you think?" Stede asks Ed.

"Ah, fuck, I don't know. I mean, you know, we're keeping it open-ended. You can't put a fuckin' time limit on fun, mate! Jack! Whip my balls!" Ed urges, laughing.

Jack whips his balls.

Of course it fucking hurts.

You sigh, having seen enough. You get up and walk across deck.

"Hey! Where ya going?" You hear Jack call.

♡♡♡

You lay on Izzy's bed and look up at the ceiling. You were glad to see Blackbeard had perked up a bit, but you were also a bit sad to see Stede not looking so comfortable. You knew Jack could be a handful.

However, Jack is not so much on your mind as Izzy is. You find yourself thinking about him a lot these days. His absence is really settling in.

You would give anything to see his face again.

"Come back, Izzy... please..."

The cabin is terribly quiet. It feels lonely. God, you miss that man.

♡♡♡

"There was the time he saved my life."

Ed and Jack were sharing stories with the crew. You were up there doing some chores on the ship as the others had stopped to listen.

"I don't like to bring it up. It's a bit immodest." Jack brushes Ed's words off.

"Come on!" "Tell us!" The crew plead.

"It was actually not too far from here, uh, matter of fact, on old Blind Man's Cove."

"Well, you know what. If it weren't for you, I wouldn't be alive today," Edward says.

"I love this dopey bastard right here." Jack laughs. "That's a real pirate! Not like one of these store-bought types."

You glance at Stede when Jack says that.

"Jack, I hate to ask, but... where's your ship and your crew?" Stede asks. "You'd think a real pirate would have those."

"Well, I'm kind of, uh, between things at the moment." Jack replies. "Look, fellas, I know it looks like I'm killin' it, but, uh... I'm really not."

There's a pause of silence.

"My crew mutinued." Jack cries. "Third time it's happened this year."

Edward comforts him. Everyone looks at Stede, disappointed.

"You made him cry." Pete says.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to."

"Well, it was a pretty bitchy question." Lucius frowns.

Ed takes Stede off to the side to talk to him. The crew move in to comfort Jack.

"It's okay, CJ. I'm sure it wasn't personal." Roach tries to comfort him.

"Yeah, well, when they tie an anchor around your leg and throw you overboard, it feels pretty personal."

"We were gonna mutiny on Stede," Pete tells Jack.

"Yeah, probably again someday." Swede adds in.

Jack smiles at them. "Thanks, fellas. Real nice of you to say."

"Calico!" Stede returns. "I was thinking would it cheer you up if we went for s little trip? Perhaps somewhere fun?"

"I don't know. Maybe. Don't make a bother for me."

"Where you wanna go?" Ed asks.

"Well, I haven't been to Blind Man's Cove in years."

"Well, Blind Man's Cove it is." Stede smiles.

♡♡♡

"Yardies! Who's up for yardies?" Jack yells.

You sit on deck, the ship just off the coast of Blind Man's Cove. It's definitely a pretty island, but the cove is quite closed in.

However, the crew have their fun.

Roach attempts a game of yardies, but doesn't clear the deck. He's alive, but man would that have hurt. You felt it yourself as he hit the side of the ship.

Later you all find yourselves on the beach. They attach a knife to a turtle and try to get it to fight a crab. The funniest part about this was watching each of the crew take sides. Turtle or crab.

Stede was standing beside you looking horrified. "This is fun?" He asks softly.

"To some."

"But not to you?"

"Oh no, not to me. Nor you by the looks of it."

Stede sighs softly.

At one point Stede goes off into the trees to pee. You'd all been drinking rum like there was no tomorrow. Jack also disappeared from the beach and you had a speaking suspicion he went after Stede.

You watch Blackbeard. He seems chipper. A lot like his old self before Stede Bonnet. Just how you remembered him. He turns and sees you, smiling.

"Isn't this fun?" He asks.

"Yeah. Fun."

Ed swings his arm around your shoulders and pulls you into his side. "Come on, smile! Just like the old days."

"Sure."

"What is it?" He asks.

"Nothing..."

"Oh... Is this about Izzy?"

You fall quiet.

"He's gone. He made his choice."

"I know. I don't need to be reminded. You can still miss someone, ya know?"

"I know."

Stede returns from beyond the trees and marches down the beach. Ed spots him and follows him. "Where you going? We're about to have a coconut war."

Turns out Stede isn't having much fun. When you hear he was heading back to the ship, you felt like doing the same. Though you knew Lucius would probably come scold you for sulking later.

Jack throws a coconut at Ed. Stede heads back to the dingy. You catch up to him.

"Can I go back with you?"

"Not having fun either?" He asks softly.

"Not really."

Stede smiles and nods. "Come on then, let's go back to the ship."

♡♡♡

When you both get back to the ship, Stede invites you into his cabin for some tea. You decide to take him up on his offer. The ship is quiet with just two of you, but it's kind of nice.

Stede pours you both some tea and some cake he had Roach prepare earlier. You both sit down and enjoy.

"I don't like who Ed is when he's with Jack," Stede says, sipping his tea.

"I know it's very different from what you've seen of him, but he really was like that all the time before."

"Yes, so I've heard." Stede sighs. "Still, the Ed I know was so different."

"Yeah. You... softened him up a bit."

Stede looks at you softly. "Is that bad?"

"Not necessarily. Just different. I don't hate it." You take a bite of your cake. "I've been getting a bit used to being on this ship."

Stede smiles. "You're welcome to stay as long as you like."

"Thank you."

While the crew pass time on the beach, you and Stede hang out. He takes you through some of his books, tells you where some of his furniture is from, and you tell him a few stories of your own sailing days.

"You talk about Izzy a lot," he points out.

"Do I?"

"Yes. You sound quite close."

"I thought we were. Turns out I was wrong."

"How so?" Stede furrows his brow at you. The pout of his lips in confusion was, dare you say, somewhat adorable?

"He left. Didn't hesitate. I must be pretty easy to leave."

"Why didn't you go with him?"

"He did ask me to, but... I don't know."

Stede reaches out and gives your hand a friendly pat. "Well, I for one am glad you stayed."

♡♡♡

As night draws in, Stede retires to bed. You decide to do the same, curling up in Izzy's old cabin again. You still refer to it as his even though he's not here any more.

The crew had returned and they had clearly being drinking none stop. The sound of smashing is keeping you awake.

You decide to at least see what's going on. When you get up to deck, Buttons is yelling at them for being so loud. He was trying to moonbathe.

"Sorry, Buttons. Maybe he's right, guys. Should we pack it in?" Ed said, clearly drunk. "It's been a day."

The crew begin to agree, and you're about ready to help some of them get to bed, but Jack refuses and grabs his whip.

"King Coconut says, we go," he whips a sack nearby, "another," he whips the deck, " round!"

Lastly he whips wildly and everyone gasps in horror as Jack whips Buttons' seagull, Karl. You stare wide eyed as Buttons picks up his little bird friend.

"He's deid." Button says, his accent heavy. "You... killed him."

Buttons hands Karl over to Roach and starts talking in tongues. "I hex upon ye, I hex upon ye, I hex upon yeee...!"

You watch in mild confusion and fascination.

"Well, thay was some weird shit."

You walk over to Jack. "You should go."

"Oh, come on. It was an accident." He grins.

"Get off my ship!" Stede calls from behind you. You move away and let him come closer. "Like they said, you should go."

"Fine. I don't give a shit. Party sucked anyway. I'm out. Who's with me?" Jack asks. He looks at you, but you remain standing beside Stede. "Oh, come on. You don't wanna stick around with this fop, do ya?"

No one moves.

Jack turns to Ed. "Blackie? I saved your life man."

"Yeah."

Stede's expression falls. "Wait. You're leaving? With him?"

You frown. First Izzy, now Blackbeard?

"This is who I am, Stede." Ed speaks quietly. He glances at you, but you don't move. "You were always gonna realise what I am."

Edward walks over to the side of the ship and then looks back over his shoulder. "Take care, mate."

You take a deep breath before walking off.

♡♡♡

Lucius was on his way to go see Stede, but decided it best to stop off by your room first. As expected you were curled up on the bed. He doesn't have to say anything for you to know he was there.

"Don't look at me like that."

"Like what?" He asks.

"With pity."

Lucius steps into the room. "I wasn't. I did want to make sure you were okay though. First Izzy, now Blackbeard."

You look at him unimpressed.

"I'm gonna go check on the captain. You coming?"

You sigh softly and get up. "Yeah."

Turns out Stede was worse off than you. He was sat by the window with his telescope, watching Ed on the beach. Oluwande had spent the night in here, so he hadn't slept all that well either.

"Has this been going on all night?" Lucius asks.

"All night. No breaks."

Lucius goes over to his captain to try and talk to him. You sigh and watch from beside where Olu is seated.

"Morning, Captain. Do you mind putting the scope down for a sec?"

Stede doesn't budge.

"Okay, I will just take this..."

"No..."

"One, two..."

"No!"

"...three."

Lucius takes the scope from Stede. He hands it over to you and you tuck it away somewhere safe.

"Long night?" Lucius asks.

"I don't know," Stede replies softly.

"OK. And do we think this more of a spat or a rupture with Blackbeard?"

Stede rests his head back with a think against the window panel behind him. "I think it's done."

Lucius sighs.

"Well, lucky for you... I'm fantastic at break-ups. I helped them with Izzy, so I can help you too."

"Izzy and I didn't break up," you say.

"Yes you did."

"We weren't together to begin with."

"Eh," Lucius shrugs. He walks past you swiftly and Stede returns to sulking.

♡♡♡

"I just wanted to let you all know, we'll be holding a buriel at sea for Karl." Stede talks to his crew.

Buttons sobs in the background.

"Understandably, Buttons is..." Buttons cries again. "...rather audibly upset. And on a related note, Blackbeard will no longer be sailing with us."

You sigh and look down at the deck. Maybe this was payback for leaving them 6 years ago. They've all left you.

"It's a big one, I know. It was a mutual decision, which I initiated first."

"So this mean we're back to being captained by just... you?" Pete asks.

"Look, technically, you've always been captained by me, and only me, so there's no change there." Stede replies to him.

"Right, but what if some of us saw ourselves more as Blackbeard's employee?"

You roll your eyes.

"I can still stay right?" You ask, turning to him.

"Course. I'd be sad to see you leave too..."

You give Stede a comforting smile and pat his later lightly.

"Look, these things happen. Sometimes captains drift apart. I know its tough, but chin up. OK? Neither of us will like you less or more than we did before."

"Bad news, Stede." You say, looking out to see.

"It is. It's terrible news," Stede replies, sighing.

"Not that. That!" You point out to sea.

An English Navy fleet have arrived. Three big ships trapping the Revenge into the cove.

"That's a lot of ship."

"Yeah, and we're trapped," you tell him.

A cannon is fired and it hits the unicorn as the front of the ship, completely beheading it.

"Warning shot," you tell Stede. "The next one's into the hull."

"Right, we should probably fire back at them, um... Prepare the cannons!"

"Wait!"

You all turn around to see Ed climbing back onboard.

"Hoist the white flag!"

"Ed!" Stede smiles. You smile too. He came back.

"Better alive than dead."

You and Ed nod at each other.

♡♡♡

Izzy watches the Revenge from the English Navy ship. He's gripping the ring around his neck as he keeps his eyes on the other ship.

"I'm here," he whispers.

The white flag is raised on the Revenge and Izzy holds his head up higher. He gets into one of the boats with the English and they row toward the Revenge, toward you.

Izzy was coming back.

♡♡♡

@grippleback-galaxy - @askmarinaandothers - @godlikegallagher - @for-fuck-sake-im-alive - @whiskeyswriting - @lxsm2 - @bloody-bunni666 - @the-chocoholic-writer - @bugbugboy - @callmemana -

[yergink]

For Real, my aro-spec ass has NEVER been as convinced by a fictional romance than ed & stede in ofmd.

i think there's definitely several factors. the fact that they're believably best friends as well as lovers. the fact that despite the meet-cute it's not a situation of love at first sight. the way they're kind of tentative about affection in a manner that feels genuine for a relationship that needs mending. the amount of respect for each other's autonomy and boundaries present. the way they don't necessarily know everything about each other and still need to learn and grow. the way they don't necessarily fit perfectly all the time. the way they're sort of messy.

but really, i think the biggest thing is that they must each, on their own, find themselves before they can be together. the way the show does not compromise their individual arcs in putting them together.

there's this quote from wtnv that i've always loved when it comes to romantic relationships, and it's something i think about pretty often when i consider the sort of relationship i might like to have, and it's this:

"We are not one person. How lonely that would be, a couple who has made themselves one so completely that they are once again alone. We are two people: separate, unique, and joined only where we choose to join." (From E55)

and i know a lot of people like codependency in fiction, and so you see it pretty often in media featuring romance, but i just adore that ofmd doesn't do that. the show is their relationship, yes, but it's also. them. stede bonnet and ed teach finding their own ways to be true to themselves. each individual, apart, so that they may not get lost in the pair they make together.

[ramsaybaggins]

I just watched the Runaway Bride for the first time with pals and I have an idea for an OFMD AU

Ed is a jaded and bored dating columnist for a national paper. He keeps going on shitty dates and writing bitter columns. He's famous, he's making money, he's bored.

He meets an old friend, Jack, at a bar. Jack has just witnessed another awful date where Ed got torn apart for his column. Jack makes himself known, sits down to have a drink and a catch up with his old buddy. Tells him about this guy, Stede Bonnet, who's run out on a bunch of weddings. The Runaway Groom, they call him.

Stede Bonnet has run out on weddings. Arranged weddings, most of them. The thing is, both parties know the score. They know Stede won't make it to the vows. He's not supposed to. The parents? They don't know the plan. But Stede and his promised, they know the plan.

It started with Marry Allamby. Arranged. Miserable. An 18 month courtship which neither of them wanted. 18 months of parents off their backs. 18 months of Mary having time to find someone she wanted. Stede found out before the wedding and they hatched their plan. Stede ran away. Mary married Doug a couple of months later.

Since then, Stede has used the privilege and wealth of his family to help others find their loves. The engagement lasts as long as needed, and once they find their person, Stede runs away. Every time. He and his family's reputation can take it. He can be weak, a coward, a joke. His arranged partners? They receive sympathy and people rally around them, and a few months later they all marry their real destined.

Oluwande met Jim, and then Archie, and then Zheng. Lucius met Pete. Frenchie met Wee John. They are all Stede's family, now.

Only Stede and his betrothed know. It's why the plan works.

Ed writes a column about Stede Bonnet, the runaway groom. Stede complains, and Ed is fired. Fine. Whatever. Who the fuck cares, he was bored anyway.

Until he's offered a unique chance - go and find out the real story behind Stede. Stede who is currently engaged. Stede who is set to be married in a few scant weeks.

Over the course of those weeks, Ed finds himself falling in love with Stede Bonnet. He's a bitch, he's caring, he's honestly a bit of a cunt. He's wonderful.

He finds out what happened to the previous fiance. Jack Rackham. He wanted to trap Stede for the money, and Stede kicked him to the curb as soon as he found out what was going on. Never even made it to the fake wedding.

When Ed confront him: "People like us don't have friends, we're all just in various stages of fucking each other over."

Ed's in love. He's pretty sure Stede is too. Ed can't sit by and watch at the pre-wedding toast as Stede is cruelly and ritually insulted by the guests and his family. He stands up for him. Stede leaves and Ed confronts him. Confronts him about moulding himself to each new person.

When Ed confesses his love breathily with a kiss at the wedding rehearsal, Stede kisses him back. The wedding is called off. Ed offers to take the fake groom's place, but for real this time.

Stede agrees.

Stede gets halfway down the aisle two days later, and runs.

Ed crashes.

One day Ed shuffles into his lonely apartment and finds Stede sitting on his sofa. Stede confesses that Ed was right. That he didn't know who he was. That he was unloveable, that people from his family and his town didn't get to marry for love anyway. So instead, he helped other people find love through him. He did everything he could to help those he could.

He never helped himself, though. And he didn't know how. But he was ready now. He understands, now.

They get married, just the two of them and their weird celebrant, Buttons, on a crisp autumn day. Stede doesn't run. Neither does Ed.

[candescentdibromoindigodreams]

Just a couple of reasons why Izzy is NOT

RICKY doing that?? Pshaw, they didn't even meet until this episode! From the narrative POV, this doesn't make any sense. Izzy supposedly taking his own life off-screen was more likely.

not enough stakes. That WE'RE GOING IN, BOIS scene almost didn't have any at all, not even to the level "someone gets hurt", definitely not to the level of "someone gets killed off". That scene was "Successful heist" vibe, not a "We're gonna look Death in the face" vibe. Izzy getting shot was like a random thing - which COULD have been poignant in a different show (about how life is tragic and unpredictable, yadda yadda), but it's really out of place here.

Izzy touched Stede's leg in the bar. This wouldn't have happened if the continuation of their relationship was not planned (and I mean plot threads getting forgotten about is a thing, but it doesnt seem to be a thing in this particular show). Teaching Stede is one thing, that can be interpreted as part of the "Izzy accepts the crew as a family" narrative, but keeping your hand on someone's knee? Not really familial and also would have been random if that was the intention.

We were shown this very same type of wound basically being easily survived by both Stede and Ed. Stede also moved a lot after getting stabbed (more blood loss, same as Izzy). Still both survived. Ed treated getting skewerd like a scratch and was not shown to be even slightly affected by it. If now this wound would suddenly be fatal that would be illogical in the context of the show.

Izzy didn't die from rotting leg infection, didn't die from the blood loss when getting a leg amputated (major surgery done by complete noobs), didn't die from pain shock, didn't die from a bullet to the head (thanks to luck but still), didn't die from a severe head trauma (I assume a bullet ricocheting off of your nogging hard enough to leave a scar would give you one. Ed definitely agrees), didn't die from subsequent alcohol poisoning while his health was very much impaired. "Indestructible little fucker" indeed, so why would he die here.

on the topic of "indestructible little fucker". The show spells out a lot of things to us with words. Sometimes also repeating them kinda incessantly (count how many times a variation on the "turn toxicity into positivity" was mentioned). So pronouncing Izzy as such is basically a spell (during a storm and lightning to boot! STYLE), it's the point of him now.

Ed and Stede getting this type of wound has made it symbolic. It would be a different wound if the creators just needed to kill Izzy off. Giving him this exact one does not give the situation a "time to go, bud" meaning, instead it connects Izzy more to the guys - and again, not in a familial sense but specifically a romantic one.

the show didn't spend nearly enough time on grieving given what Izzy is to the story. Instead, that was the only time of broken pacing and vibe tbh, it was a bit jarring (he dead. okay, now wedding). I mean, Im not expecting the SPN-final-death levels of time spent, but still.

There was no narrative sense for Izzy to die after the journey he had in S2. That was a character on the mend, having ALREADY paid off all their sins. A second punishment like that (and by cinema rules death is always either a tragedy (not that type of show here), a joke (not that type of show or situation) or a punishment) is undeserved and illogical.

By the end of S2 Stede was not being his best, but rather kind of an asshole. This character clearly has not finished his journey yet to settle in an "inn" or whatever. Which means that the guys are there only for the purpose of being close to the grave for when Izzy gets back.

If we assume that removing Izzy was important for BlackBonnet - why? To make them closer? What is he, their child or parent (not even really a friend), why would his death make them closer? Plus, they already got to that point without his help. It would make a bit of sense if he was Ed's pronounced romantic ex who was still a threat that needed to go but that's not the case. It would make a bit of sense if he was Ed's pronounced past / the Blackbeard that needed to die - and to be clear, he was (WAS) that to a certain degree in S1 and the creators tried to use that point - BUT Ed ALREADY both rejected his past/BB persona (via Jack for instance) AND also accepted and embraced that part of himself. The narrative tells us that Ed learned to use his "darkness" for relative good, to protect those around him or as means to achieve something good. Izzy did not need to be cut off for this plotpoint.

It would make sense to write the character out if the actor needed it. But we know for a fact that Con loves playing Izzy. So not the case either.

S2 specifically established with Ed's "gravy basket" situation that none of those idiots know how to certify someone's death.

Izzy somehow being back after this gives (more) purpose to the whole Buttons Burb situation. Introing what, real magic (??) into the show was a weird point in itself (and it was not refuted in the show as, say, Ed's confusion) but also a point that went kinda nowhere. But it's not "nowhere" if it was needed for S3 Izzy return!

The only kinda one real point towards Izzy really being gone is

cinema rule number whatever: they show the character's dead face with open eyes. And the show did do that… But again, freakin Bird Buttons flew on his grave. So Izzy definitely comes out of it.

But thank you for giving us a chance to enjoy Con's impeccable dying acting!

[jellybeanium124]

suddenly had this super vivid idea of ed being a several hundred year old vampire living in a big empty castle with no one but his vampire-butler izzy for company. humans will sometimes come looking for a place for the night and then they'll kill their guests and drink their blood after toying with them for a bit. but ed's getting tired of the whole routine, and especially with GPS and google maps humans don't get lost in the woods needing a place to sleep for the night as much as they used to. they have to go into town to find victims these days.

and then one day stede stumbles upon them like the good old days. his phone is broken or smth so he has no way to contact the outside world. he spills his sob story to ed. divorced, has no friends, nobody would notice if he went missing. and every time stede is out of earshot izzy is pestering him that this is perfect and the man's annoying let's kill him and drink his blood already. but ed likes stede too much, he feels a kinship with him. idk where it goes from there, obviously a happy ending of some kind. idk what happens to izzy exactly but like vampire shenanigans.

also after the reveal and ed and stede getting together as a couple stede is absolutely down to let ed drink his blood but not enough to kill him and they both find it weirdly sexy. normally ed doesn't like domming but there's something very sexy and cute about stede pretending to be a helpless little human who is willingly offering his blood to avoid death and the moans stede makes while he's being drunk are really fucking sexy, and he's really cute when he's a little dazed and loopy afterwards.

[piratecaptainscaptainpirates]

Ed and Stede would absolutely be that couple with a billion little codes for when they need out of a situation.

At a social situation and they're getting tired? Stede's probably been watching for it because Ed's been getting quiet and clingy, but then Ed'll pop his head up from where he's been hiding his face in Stede's neck and mumble something tangentially related to what they were talking about, "yeah, yeah, beer's really good here, Stede and I had this orange lager a few months ago," and Stede's been looking for oranges because that's their code word, and he's able to make a timely excuse so none of their friends are any the wiser. They get to go home and cuddle and recharge.

They're in public and meet up with an old friend of Ed's, Stede's already on edge because Ed's smile doesn't look quiet right, Ed takes his hand and squeezes it three times and Stede knows it's time to talk about a very important appointment they're going to miss if they don't leave right now immediately.

Stede's on the phone with a distant family member or old business contact looking for his father, Ed's listening in because Stede's voice is getting overly polite and that's never a good sign. Stede slips in a "oh, isn't that down by the coast, there's a lighthouse there" and Ed starts loudly going "hey baaaaabe can you come in here??? That mole is baaaack and I need you to look at it" so Stede can hang up the phone.

Just giving each other the agency to choose when it's time to leave and helping them get out. Ed's felt so forced to do things he doesn't want to do for so long; Stede's used to having no one in his corner. But with their powers combined? They can finally leave situations they don't want to be in.

[diamondcitydarlin]

'but but but male friendship and platonic intimacy are important toooo!!!'

Okay I'm sorry I've been hearing this over and over and over again through the years, it seems to be go-to response of creators/writers/actors/apologists every fucking time a possible queer M/M pairing is shafted to the side and I'm getting so tired of it.

First of all, like I've also been saying SO MANY TIMES through the years, the depiction of platonic male friendship and intimacy in media really isn't some kind of uncharted waters situation like all these people want us to believe. I would GUESS that platonic male friendship and comradery makes up at least 75% (if not more) of media created since films first started being made and that really says nothing of all the literature that preceded. Hell, 'buddy cop comedy' is a genre all unto itself and usually depicts two straight men in the main roles (not always, but when it's anything other than two straight guys it's generally seen as a subversion of the genre). I'm not saying that platonic male friendship doesn't have it's place in media and needs to be done away with wholesale and all fictional male friends now need to fuck and date each other, I'm not saying that it isn't important to show platonic queer male friend characters (more on this in a moment), I'm just saying I'm tired of people acting like 'platonic male friendship' is some kind of underrepresented, underappreciated thing in media every time someone doesn't want to write a queer M/M dynamic when you could literally select any film made between 1920 and now at random and there would be at least a 7/10 chance it depicted two or more men as platonic hetero friends as the emotional crux of the plot. Like please stop gaslighting us and just say you didn't want to write the thing, this is so stupid.

Second of all, (and this is what really gets me) most of these pieces of media that have ended up pulling the 'BUT PLATONIC QUEER FRIENDSHIP' card already fucking have male and even queer male characters as friends in the cast, outside of the relationship in question or, at the very least, have the potential to depict that with many other characters in the cast. Since I'm primarily reacting to Shadows here, I'll use that as a perfect example; both Guillermo and Nandor are friends with several other male characters in the cast, both peripheral and main. If platonic male friendship and intimacy is so important, then what about these dynamics? What about Guillermo and Laszlo's weird blossoming friendship in season 4? What about whatever it is Colin and Laszlo have going on? What about Nandor and Laszlo (though ig they fuck so maybe they don't count bc remember, sex between men is either gross or funny and meaningless)? SEAN AND LAZSLO?? What about Guillermo and Derek? (REMEMBER HIM??) Hell, what about Guillermo's friend from the orgy who ends up topping the vampire, both of whom we literally never hear of again?? Why are Nandor and Guillermo suddenly the load-bearing 'platonic male friendship' of the show when there were many, many, many, many other opportunities to depict that both with and without them? Suddenly at the eleventh hour when it was time to commit or quit to the Nandermo slowburn, 'platonic male friendship' is just so important you guys??? The math ain't mathing. ANOTHER example of this actually done well WHILE FEATURING A CANONICALLY QUEER COUPLE was Our Flag Means Death. Stede and Ed had their romance, but there were also complex queer platonic friendships and dynamics between them and the rest of the cast and the cast among themselves. So, OBVIOUSLY, we can have our cake and eat it too here, can't we? CAN'T WE??

Thirdly, it is undeniable to me that there is an element of homophobia to this argument, as whenever the 'what about platonic male friendship' comes up it's usually accompanied by the implication that IF these two male characters were to be romantic and/or sexual with each other that would somehow diminish their bond. There's always an implication that them being platonic and sexless is somehow 'purer' and we should be grateful for it, and anyone who might have seen potential for and/or wanted to see something sexual and/or romantic between them is a weirdo gross pervert, which rounds us back to the very conservative concept that sex/romantic intimacy in general is just ew icky gross, inherently impure, especially (for some reason) when it could happen between queer characters. (Which, as others have pointed out, is a weird stance to try to take for the show that had NO PROBLEM showing Laszlo, Nadja-ghost and his friend he just finished raising like a son having sex with each other as a joke- that's totally fine and hilarious, but heaven forbid Guillermo and Nandor should share a chaste kiss or something)

Anyway, the point of this ramble-rant being, I REALLY wish people on these shows would just say 'We didn't want to do that' when it comes to a potential M/M queer pairing rather than trying to take some kind of moral soap-box stance about the inherent purity of sexless, platonic male friendships (especially when the show in question had opportunity after opportunity to explore that with several different characters). It's not only gaslighting an audience of people who are WELL AWARE of what media has consisted of over the past 100 years, it also comes with the implication that romantic/sexual intimacy between men is always way ickier than the alternative AND that anyone who felt it could have happened or wanted to see it happen is gross and weird. It's rude, it's demeaning and wholly unnecessary. Just say you didn't want to write it and go, thanks!

[epersonae]

I wrote this originally as a reblog of something else, but after letting it sit in drafts for a while realized it needed to be its own thing. (but do go read that post, it was what got me thinking in this specific direction) I have not edited it much, other than to remove some intro about the kind of shitty day(s) I was having in my non-online life that were part of why I wrote something and then sat on it.

I have been thinking about

Don't like, don't read

(I saw this with rainbow text, and I asked how the fuck to do that, and frankly I don't have that level of patience, so just imagine it rainbow I guess)

And..........

Sure? We're all just here to have a good time or whatever, and Just Like Stuff, and it's exhausting being a hater (but also [stares at people I know who I've seen say all that and who are also ABSOLUTELY haters in private])

But I want something more nuanced than that. I mean that as both:

a writer of things I know other people have taken issue with (including, I remembered today, something that I heard secondhand about, in addition to the vagueblogging I've mentioned in an earlier post about my older fic)

and a reader/art appreciator who has some issues with things I've tried to read and art I've seen.

I don't what it is or how it works or how to get from here to there. I don't even really know how to do this with people I'm close to! (with the exception of having been a thoroughly obnoxious beta constantly saying "make me believe this could even happen", or pointing out conflicts with canon or whatever) I tend to silently nope out and then change my opinion of the person without ever telling them, because yeah, I'm horrifically conflict averse.

Which is why this might sit in my drafts for a long time.

And then, outside of friendships, and Difficult Conversations or whatever

I don't like pile-ons. I don't like a couple of people trying to articulate what bugs them about a piece of writing, and maybe being awkward or clumsy about it, and immediately getting drowned out by "you're being mean to my friends". (and I say that as someone who has had friends' writing receive this sort of critique! Multiple friends!) Maybe the immediate answer is, yes, the back button, but it has to be possible to dissect what's bothering you about a piece of writing (or a trope, or a ship) without it being negativity or an attack.

Here, I'll go first, because these are two things in OFMD fic that bug me endlessly, that writers I like have written, and I think they exhibit a subversion of the source material that is counter to the actual themes of the show.

Note: since I wrote all of this, I have written a little bit about my sort of complicated feelings about a fic that imho is an original novel in a trenchcoat, a sort of fic lacroix despite being very good. these examples are in the same vein as that.

Inevitable fucking disclaimer: I don't think people are wrong or bad for doing these things, I'm not going to try to make anybody stop, I practice don't like don't read (and I have some exceptions that I've enjoyed despite it being something I don't like generally)

Enemies to lovers: the whole point of Ed and Stede is that they click perfectly and immediately. They like each other! From the very first minute it's friendship and mutual admiration and delight and attraction. Enemies to lovers is a cliche that belongs to a different story entirely. I wish people would think more before jumping to that trope. (I've had an AU in my head for months that I absolutely cannot write until I solve this problem from the AU's source material) It's an interesting question to me, actually, why it seems to be so easy to write characters who don't like each other and then somehow fall in love, when the source material shows them liking each other SO MUCH right away.

Younger than middle aged: again, the whole point is that they are changing their lives, that their midlife crises brings them to the point where they can find love. I think it's a djenks Themes and Motifs thing, to have a story about getting to this point in your life and really looking at it and going "am I where I need to be?" Also it's incredibly unique and special to me after the last few years of my own rolling midlife crisis. (petty thought that I have sometimes: it is a failure of imagination about or knowledge of actual middle-aged people) Tbh, this goes double for age difference, I will nope out of that even faster than both of them being young.

And I think there's something about being able to not like something and still not be a dick about it, to know enough about what you do like to look at something and say "this doesn't work for me and here's why", to engage thoughtfully and critically (and yeah occasionally in public) while still having respect for the other person.

I am thinking also of @emi--rose and @frommybookbook and music, and their efforts to find kpop and Taylor Swift, respectively, that I might enjoy, because I don't like most of either, and I think this thing we've been doing is helping all three of us understand more about what we all do and don't like.

[pausing to think]

It occurs to me, also, that I spent a lot of time griping while editing for the benefit of all the broken hearts, about having to go back and do a lot of set up/rewriting to make some of what happens in that read plausibly. And I was soooooo bitchy about it and also that critique was all correct and it made the story stronger even aside from making it more "canonical", whatever the fuck that means in that particular setting.

And that was in the particular creative intimacy setting of working with a beta, which is different, admittedly, from random critique on the open internet.

But then I spent a while, back in the day, immersed in the TAZ questions of "is Lucretia a lesbian?" and "can Magnus ever love again?" and I wrote my rarepair (and associated polycule shipping) very much from my id, and a certain amount of "you can't tell me that didn't happen" that was based on overidentification and personal experience, but there were definitely people who were pretty publicly "ew" about it, and I had to think through my position, and both decide what felt true about and also decide to write from my weird heart, but not blindly.

Idk, I've written all of this and I'm just landing on

I think introspection is nice.

I think it's good to do, I think it's worth thinking about what you like and don't like, and maybe where that comes from, and not in a puriteen way but with sincerity and curiosity. I would like to support and encourage that spirit of artistic introspection.

[our-death-means-flag]

izzy hands x reader with enemies to lovers. that’s it. that’s the ask. im so in love w that angy little man

Bonding Under Duress

Ship: Izzy Hands x Reader  Summary: Stede really wants the crew to get along or at the very least tolerate each other. Unfortunately that includes you and Izzy. So the two of you get sent on an errand for the captains with the actual goal of the two of you getting to know each other. A storm has other plans and you and Izzy learn much more than you wanted to about each other… Warnings: minor descriptions of injury, Izzy being very mean to himself, angst, hurt/comfort

“Absolutely fockin’ not!”

“As much as I hate to agree with that asshole, no.”

For once you and Izzy agreed on something, both of you glaring at each other when you realized.

Stede wilted. You immediately felt the urge to comfort him. “Captain, I’m not trying to question your judgment here, but really, no. There’s no need for this.” You reassured.

Izzy scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Fockin’ ridiculous…” He grumbled under his breath. “I don’t take orders from you, you posh twat.” He snapped at Stede.

You immediately shot him a deathly glare. “God, you're predictable. Get some new material or just shut the fuck up.” 

“Hey now, both of you. I’m not asking.” Stede puffed his chest out a tad. “It’s an order from your captain. I’m not expecting you two to become best friends or anything. All you need to do is go on that island and bring back some peaches! Shouldn't take more than a couple of hours and who knows, you may learn something about each other.” Stede seemed very optimistic. 

You sighed, already nodding, well aware of how far Stede was willing to go for an idea like this.

Izzy seemed to be about to protest when Ed leaned in. “An order from both of your captains actually!” He chimed in.

“Edward…” Izzy all but whined.

“Izzy.” Edward echoed, even mockingly copying Izzy’s whiny tone.

You watched as Izzy’s face flushed every shade of red, though whether it was rage or embarrassment or maybe both, you couldn’t tell. You bit your lip to keep yourself from laughing.  Izzy must have noticed since that seemed to set him off. “Oh fuck off. I’m not going to some stupid fockin’  island to get some stupid fockin’ peaches with this stupid fockin’-

“Bye! See you in a few hours! Have fun, you two!” Ed yelled cheerfully as he was towed away.  

You waved while watching Izzy in your peripheral vision. The bastard looked furious. So much so that he was practically vibrating with rage. Then again he had been thrown over Ed’s shoulder like a bag of potatoes and all but dragged here. 

“So…” You finally asked, drawing the word out, on guard in case he decided to bite you. “Let’s go find some stupid fockin’ peaches, eh?” You couldn’t manage to mimic Izzy’s voice but if you said so yourself, your ‘fock’ was pretty accurate.

Izzy snarled. “Piss off. We’re not working together. I’m going one way and you go the other.” He turned on his heels and stormed closer to the edge of the forested part of the island. You merely waited. He paused, deep in thought, glanced one way, then the other and then seemingly realized what you already knew.

You, of course, decided to rub it in. “I sure won’t stop you if that’s what you want. But I’d recommend against it. Not only is it against captains’ orders but when was the last time you did any navigating on land?” Izzy seethed and you grinned. “Also I have all the stuff, since rather than acting like a feral dog, I actually packed so… again, all your call of course.”

Izzy very obviously considered running off on his own if just to spite you but instead he turned quickly and stormed up to you. “Fine. You’re right.” He said it like the words burned his throat. “But I swear if you get us lost-“

“Yes, yes, I know, you’ll maim me and/or kill me in some creatively brutal and violent fashion.” You waved a hand dismissively. Deciding to go further you added. “Which you and I both know you won’t do since that’d piss off the captains.” You knew you shouldn’t keep teasing but you enjoyed watching Izzy turn red.

With a seething Izzy following you, you started trekking into the forest. Luckily you’d come prepared and had brought along your wide knife to cut through the foliage. The terrain of the island wasn’t quite the same as the ones you’d been on before but it was close enough.

The two of you walked mostly in silence with you occasionally warning about upcoming hazards in your path. You easily navigated the uneven terrain but Izzy had significantly more difficulty. Probably because he was used to a ship. As much as a ship swaying could mess up your balance, it was not comparable to uneven weird terrain like this. 

The first few times you’d chimed in with a “careful” or “watch your step” Izzy had snarled back at you to “Fuck off”. But after nearly falling on his ass a few times, he started to take your warnings more seriously.

(Honestly you deserved sainthood for not laughing until your lungs failed every time he almost fell. Especially since he’d always flail and pinwheel his arms to keep steady.  Something made even funnier by the fact that he was unharmed beside his ego.)

Luckily for both Izzy and your composure, you managed to track down the peach tree quickly enough. As you clambered up the tree and gathered up the requested fruit, Izzy stood around looking woefully out of place. 

You really were trying to work on Stede’s ridiculous bonding plan but you couldn’t resist and pelted Izzy with a peach. You nailed him dead center in the chest. He jumped clearly not having expected the sudden fruit attack but somehow his reaction time was quick enough to catch the peach as it bounced off his chest. He shot you a glare which you returned with a smile. Izzy tossed the peach in his hand, clearly silently considering throwing it back at you. However you simply motioned with the extra bag you’d brought which was currently full of peaches, making it readily apparent that you would in fact, return fire and that you had much more ammo. He backed off.

You climbed down from the tree and just as you were sorting yourself out…

BONK.

A peach contacted the side of your head. You spun to face Izzy and he had the gall to look confused and  innocent despite the fact that he clearly no longer had a peach in hand. You couldn’t help but smirk as you ducked down to pick up the peach and as you were standing up (but before you fully did) you threw it at him.

It just kept going that way as the two of you walked back. The peach being tossed back and forth with varied strength. Whether or not it was possible to break someone’s nose with a peach, Izzy sure as hell was trying to. Hell he’d nearly succeeded throwing the peach so hard you nearly hit yourself in the face with your own hand just from catching it. You on the other hand, had a simpler goal, you wanted to land it on his head. Izzy seemed to assume that you were aiming for his face so his defenses were focused there instead. You were certain you could land it before the two of you made it to the beach but you didn’t get the chance.

You noticed first. Izzy seemed really uncomfortable on land so that’s probably why he missed it. However you’d thought the air felt off all day. But it was only when the first thunder crack pierced the mostly quiet area that you realized that the off-ness you were feeling was the same way you’d feel before a storm.

Izzy had been mid throw when it happened. The peach hit you in the leg and was instantly forgotten as his attention immediately darted towards where you knew the shore was, doubtlessly worrying about Ed. “We have to get to the Revenge.” 

Izzy looked genuinely concerned so you didn’t give a snarky answer. “We can’t. There’s no way they can get a dingy out in what’s about to be a storm.” Your words were immediately emphasized when rain started pouring down. “We can’t make it back now. Let’s find somewhere to hunker down and get back when the storm passes.” Izzy still looked moments away from booking it back to the ship. “Ed, Fang, and Ivan are all on that ship. You don’t have to trust anyone else, just trust that they can handle it. Don’t risk making them worry about us on top of managing the ship.” 

Izzy cursed under his breath as he visibly struggled with the choice but luckily your logic won him over and you didn’t have to drag him. “Fine.” He hissed the word out harsher than any curse word. 

The storm hadn’t been gracious enough to give the two of you any time to talk and the wind and rain was already getting stronger. Despite just having had to talk Izzy out of this exact thing, you couldn’t help but worry about the Revenge. The island was pretty much all tall mountains, you doubted that your crew had gotten much warning. But you had to accept your own logic. They’d handle it. You could trust Ed and Stede to keep the ship safe (admittedly mostly the former).

The wind and rain made traversing the nasty terrain even more difficult than it had been before. The wind knocked you off balance and the rain made the ground slippery. The warm day you’d been having moments ago had vanished, the rain coupled with the wind made you nearly shiver. Despite the cold, you couldn’t run for cover. You had to painstakingly walk carefully to avoid falling.

After you got dangerously close to losing your balance at the edge of a small valley, you decided to reach out a hand to Izzy since you could tell he was struggling. His frantic stumbling was significantly less funny when he was actually in danger. Of course, Izzy didn’t appreciate your offer. You took it as a testament of how much you’d seen Izzy swear that even over the deafening roaring wind, you could tell he was telling you to “Fuck off”.

You could feel the mud under your boots shifting and you were incredibly worried about it giving out in a mudslide so you tried your damndest to move as quickly as possible. You nearly fell when your boot slipped out from under you. If the wind wasn’t so goddamn loud, Izzy might have actually heard your warning. But the sound of your voice was easily overpowered by the wind.  

Then the ground gave out from under both of you. You just barely had the time to launch yourself backwards, slamming none too gently into a tree for your troubles. Izzy wasn’t so lucky. You were immediately back on your feet and spotted him lying at the bottom of the small valley.

“Izzy?” You called out as loudly as you could. No reply. He didn’t so much as stir. Even if he hadn’t heard you, you doubted Izzy would just lay on the ground. “Shit.” You mumbled under your breath and quickly as you could, you made your way down, none too gracefully. You were at his side shockingly fast. Izzy was a little banged up but he was breathing thankfully, though it looked like he’d hit his head. He was out cold. “Well, shit.” You mumbled to yourself.

You ducked down and were able to carefully maneuver Izzy into your arms. For such a small man, he was shockingly heavy. But the universe did give you a bit of mercy when you spotted a small cave, looking to be most protected from the storm. You managed to drag the two of you inside. You put both Izzy and the bag of peaches down and dropped down to the ground, exhausted. Even though you were out of the wind in the rain, you were still soaked and you were still freezing. You forced  yourself to get back up. 

Luckily, the wind blew quite a few sticks further into the cave so you weren’t stuck trying to build a fire with wet tinder. Cold and uncomfortable as you were, it was incredibly difficult to be patient enough to slowly grow the fire but your dedication paid off. Before long You were basking in the warmth of a newly made fine.

You pulled off your overcoat which, while completely soaked, had protected most of your clothes. Izzy had given you shit about it, how a long coat wasn’t practical in the Caribbean (ironic, coming from a man in leather pants and a leather vest). 

Despite what you wanted to do you knew you couldn’t just sit by the fire. You had  to take care of Izzy as well. You dragged yourself up and knelt down by Izzy. He had a small cut on the back of his head but luckily it didn’t seem to be that bad. You didn’t hesitate to tear off one of your sleeves to wrap it up. You pulled Izzy as close to the fire as you dared but he was still shivering a little. You managed to pull him up so you could start the daunting task of getting him out of his vest and shirt. His vest was pretty easy but his shirt was completely soaked and probably responsible for sapping a lot of his body heat. 

As you untied his cravat you noticed the ring around it. You’d spotted the ring before (gotten a pretty close look when Izzy decided he needed to get into your face to yell at you). He always wore it. It was clearly important to him so you didn’t want to just set it aside and risk it getting lost, so instead you slipped it into one of your pockets. At least it would be safe there until Izzy was conscious enough to not lose it.

You had to rest his head on your shoulder so you could wrestle his dead weight out of his shirt. ‘Please don’t wake up right now. Please don’t wake up right now, ‘ you silently begged the universe, because, while you usually followed Stede’s ‘talk it through’ method, that was a conversation that you didn’t want to have. Luckily for once in this dumpster fire of a day, you at least got that and Izzy stayed unconscious. 

You definitely did not glance at his chest, taking in the mix of scars and tattoos that you’d never seen before. And it definitely didn’t look incredibly attractive on him. Not at all.Your jacket was dry at that point so you laid it over Izzy as a makeshift blanket. You considered taking his sword since you didn’t want to get stabbed on instinct when he woke up, but you also figured he’d probably feel better if he had it with him. 

You crumpled against the opposite wall of the cave and basked in the warmth of the fire. Since you were the only one who was conscious, you had watch duty by default. You glanced at Izzy. Hopefully he’d wake up soon. You doubted you could carry him back to the dingy and leaving him behind so you could get someone to help you made you incredibly nervous. 

It was strange to see him so calm. With his face so relaxed and your sleeve wrapped around his head, he looked like a completely different person. You let yourself stare at him for a moment before focusing on something else. Luckily your bag full of peaches was within arm’s reach. Quite a few of them had been crushed or otherwise mangled by the rough journey but you managed to find one that was mostly intact.

At least you had snacks…

---

It wasn’t easy to gauge the passage of time in a cave but you’d have to guess it had been around an hour. You’d had to go grab more twigs and tinder for the fire and the rain seemed to be slowing. That was something at least. Looked like the storm was going to stop soon. Then you’d have to figure out how to get Izzy and yourself back to the Revenge. 

Before you could worry about that a low raspy groan caught your attention. Izzy was waking up… He immediately grabbed at his head, hand going for the injury at the back of his head. 

“Careful!” You said, more on instinct than anything else.

His eyes immediately darted to you and after a brief moment where he seemed to take in his surroundings, he immediately drew his sword and pointed it at you and skittered away as best he could until his back hit the wall. His whole body seemed shaky and uncertain, the hand holding the sword was trembling.

You held your hands up in slight surrender, not wanting to freak him out any more than you already had. “Well, good morning to you too…” you managed, voice shaking slightly with an awkward chuckle. He stared longer. Not knowing what to do, you cracked a joke to ease the tension. “I know, the one sleeve thing looks great on Ed but it sure looks stupid on me eh?” You motioned with your bare arm for emphasis.

“What the fuck…?” He managed to hiss out, he looked genuinely confused.

You furrowed your brow. “Do you remember what happened?” You weren’t a doctor by any means but memory loss could happen with head injuries.

“I…” Izzy managed. He lowered his sword and clutched at his head. “I fell?” He mused, more to himself before a look of clarity passed over him and he hissed out “stupid fockin Stede Bonnet. Stupid fockin peaches.” 

You breathed a sigh of relief, if he was pissed off, then that was back to the status quo for Izzy. “So you definitely remember then. How’s your head?”

“How the hell do you think it is? It fuckin’ hurts.” He snapped at you. He glanced around getting a proper look at your surroundings. “What the fuck happened?”

Glad that he seemed more calm and had stopped pointing a sword at you, you explain what happened: how he’d  fell, how you’d dragged him here. When you reached the part where you’d taken his shirt off, he’d immediately looked down and seemingly realized that he was in fact, not wearing a shirt. He pulled your jacket up to cover himself more, looking almost comically like a blushing lady. 

“Why the fuck?” He immediately snarled at you.

You rolled your eyes. “Because it was soaking wet and you were shivering? You would’ve frozen your damn tits off if I hadn’t.”

He looked like he was moments away from snapping at you when he stopped himself and his hand immediately shot to his throat. Before he could say anything you jumped in, well aware of what he was about to ask. “I have it, don’t worry.” You patted the ring in your pocket. Izzy stared at you almost nervously. You probably would’ve teased him at any other time but you could tell he was genuinely concerned, so you didn’t. 

You stood slowly and walked around the fire, choreographing your movements as not to take him by surprise. “Here,” you said as you gently placed the ring in his hand. He clutched it tightly to his chest, one hand clutching his ring and the other toying with the fabric of your coat. You sat back down and leaned against the wall of the cave.

You expected Izzy to break the silence with an insult or a sarcastic comment, instead you got a soft, shaky, “Why?”

“You wear that ring all the time. It’s clearly important to you and I didn’t want it to roll away or get lost or  something. I-“

“Not the ring.” Izzy interrupted. You raised a brow. “This.” He motioned at himself and the cave around the two of you. “All of this.”

You didn’t expect to somehow get more confused after his explanation. “What do you mean by ‘this’? I mean, sure a cave ain’t all that cozy but it got us out of the storm…. Besides-“

“No!” Izzy snapped, clearly furious. You immediately shut up, not sure what to do. He luckily didn’t raise his sword at you but he leveled a finger pointing at you accusingly. “Why did you do any of this?”

You furrowed your brows, trying to figure out what he meant. “Uh, you know that if I’d left you back there, you could’ve died?”  

He nodded as you thought he might get it then he spoke again. “You hate me.” He said it so matter-of-factly, as if it were just a given, a fact of the world.

You blinked. The pieces clicked together. “I don’t hate you.” You explained softly. Izzy scoffed, disbelief clear on his face. “No, I’m being honest. I don’t hate you. Granted  you can be a fucking asshole. But, I only give you shit because you give my crew shit. I don’t hate you. And even if I did I sure as hell wouldn’t have left you for dead.”

Had he really expected you to just leave him there? 

“Wait…” Though, that did raise a concerning question… “Are you telling me that you would have left me?”

Izzy rolled his eyes. “Of course not. You’re one of few people on that ship that knows what they’re doing. Besides, even if I wanted to, the crew wouldn’t believe me.  Even if it was an accident, they’d all assume I killed you. But they actually like you. Even the captains. You could come back drenched in my blood and they’d still believe whatever you said.” Izzy chuckled humorlessly.

You stared, too stunned to speak. Suddenly, you felt awful about teasing him before. No wonder he was so incredibly hostile if he thought you could murder him and get away with it, that you hated him enough to do it. You buried your face in your hands. “Damn it, I’m so sorry.”

“Why?” You glanced up to see Izzy was staring at you, confusion clear on his face. 

You hesitated, trying to figure out how best to phrase it so it wouldn’t sound patronizing. “I’m so sorry for anything I did that made you feel like you weren’t safe with me. I doubt my words mean much but, I really wasn’t going to do anything more than tease… or hit you with a peach… Sorry about that too.”

His expression only got more confused. You watched as he went from confused to a little scared then immediately to annoyed. “Don’t pretend to care!” He snapped. “If you're planning on lowering my guard for some later attack, it wont work.”

 The ‘it won’t work this time’ was implied. Sure, you hadn’t been a pirate all that long, but you certainly knew how awful people could be. You couldn’t help but wonder about Izzy’s scars. Had he gotten any of them from crew members who hated him? Just waiting for a moment of vulnerability to pounce. 

Izzy Hands was making far too much sense for you all of a sudden. 

“That’s happened before?”

Izzy all but growled at you for that then he actually looked at you. He seemed surprised by whatever he saw. “Of course.” He replied, again his voice matter-of-fact as if that was somehow supposed to make sense. 

 But you were undeterred. “That may be how some people are… But you’ve made it pretty clear how soft and pathetic the Revenge Crew is.” He didn’t seem convinced. “If I really wanted to do something like that, we literally would not be having this conversation right now!” You emphasized. 

“Unless you want something from me.” Izzy snapped immediately.

“Well, I don’t. Not really. You don’t really have to believe me. But I’m not going to hold this over your head. Really, I would've done the exact same thing if anyone else got hurt.” 

Izzy stared at you, eyebrow raised. After a long moment, he huffed and broke eye contact. “I can’t understand you…”

You sighed. It seems like the two of you got completely opposite things from this. You could finally understand at least in part why Izzy was like that, while he was completely baffled by you. You were saved from the uncomfortable silence by noticing that the rain had finally subsided. “Ah, the rain’s gone. Finally, we can get back to the ship.”

---

Izzy watched, pensive, as you stood and stretched, grabbing the bag filled with those stupid fockin peaches, carefully putting out the fire and generally cleaning up. He couldn’t help but notice your bare arm, the one whose sleeve was currently wrapped around his head. 

“Oh, here!” You tossed him his vest, shirt and cravat. They were all in good condition. You’d clearly taken care to take them off without damaging them. Eager to put all this strangeness behind him, Izzy wrestled his shirt and vest on, keeping an eye on you as he did.

None of this made any sense. 

You hated  him. He knew that. You’d made it clear from the moment you’d met. You were Bonnet’s first mate, loyal to your captain and protective over your crew. You’d made it no secret that you didn’t like how he did things. 

Izzy had been hated before. Of course he had. He had a position that people wanted and he was well aware that he wasn’t all that likable. At least before people had a reason to fear him as well. You didn’t. You had an entire crew behind you and with Edward so wrapped up in Bonnet, Izzy didn’t have anyone to protect him. 

Well, except… You, apparently.  You, who’d had every opportunity to get rid of him on this stupid trip even before the storm came in.

 And yet, here he was. Unharmed. Not only had you not tried anything besides the same teasing as usual, but you’d actually saved him. That alone was completely ridiculous. But you’d done more than that. You’d gone out of your way to take care of him. (His ring felt like it was burning in his hand as he put it back in place.) Even if you weren’t going to kill him solely out of respect for your captains, you wouldn’t have needed to do any more than drag him here. Yet, you’d not only torn your shirt to patch him up, you’d given him your jacket and even taken the time to make sure he didn’t lose his ring, just because you knew it was important to him.

He tried to stand but he was quickly overcome with dizziness and nausea so he stumbled. He braced himself to hit the ground but… Instead he found himself leaning against your chest, your arms wrapped around him.

“Shit! Izzy you okay? Ah, fuck dumb question, sorry. Are you feeling dizzy?” Your voice was still so fucking concerned. No mockery. You gently pulled away, seemingly unphased by the fact that he wasn’t responding to you, still supporting him so he didn’t fall. “You… uh… can hang on to my jacket if you like?” Your words made him realize that he was still desperately clutching your jacket.

He hissed out a “Fuck off” on reflex but… Fuck it. He slipped your jacket on. It didn’t really fit all that well but it was warm. 

You smiled. “How about this…” You let him wrap an arm around your shoulder. “I don’t think you should be walking on your own but I sure as hell can’t carry you anymore. For such a tiny man, you’re rather heavy…”

Izzy scoffed. “Not my fucking fault you’re a giant.” He grumbled. There was less bite in his tone than usual but it was absolutely still there.

You smiled at the insult. “I’ll take that as you feeling a bit better. You’re already being a snarky asshole.”

It had been a pain in the ass to clamber back up the hill he’d slipped down. Honestly, Izzy was surprised you managed to clamber down in the middle of the storm and not fall as well. 

The walk back was generally quiet only broken by your occasional comment of “careful” or “watch your step” which, Izzy was realizing, you’d done before. He’d assumed that you were being condescending. But now, considering everything else you’d done you must have been genuinely warning him. The more he thought about it the more he realized how you’d never really been that bad. You teased and occasionally the two of you would get into genuine arguments, but you never did anything particularly malicious. And you clearly cared about your crew. You’d check in on everyone (himself included he realized suddenly) after a raid, make sure everyone ate, and, while you were far too lax about it in Izzy’s opinion, you did make sure chores got done.

Hell, considering how much of non-captain Stede fockin’ Bonnet was, Izzy had little doubt in his mind that you’d been mostly running the ship.

You were still soft. Too soft. But, clearly, it was working to some extent.

You were actually making far too much sense for him all of a sudden. 

Dammit.

Luckily, it didn’t take long for the two of you to find the beach. The Revenge was visible in the water and even from this distance, Izzy could tell that it was undamaged. A dinghy was also already enroute and its passengers all immediately waved at the two of you once they spotted you. 

Edward, impatient as ever, decided he wasn’t going to wait and jumped off the dinghy and waded the last few feet of water before sprinting over to you. “Izzy! Y/N! You two okay? Nasty one that was, huh?” (Any other time, Izzy would have probably chastised him for jumping into the water like that (especially after a storm) but right now, he was just glad to see his captain was safe. )

“Izzy hit his head. Pretty sure it's not that bad but he might have a concussion.” You reported quickly. “Is everyone else all right?”

“Everyone’s fine!” Ed replied.

“The ship?” Izzy asked.

“Fine as well, Iz. No worries.” Edward assured. A pause. “Well… Aside from a few of Stede’s books.” 

Izzy rolled his eyes. Of course.

The dinghy ride back was irritating. Roach seemed determined to check Izzy for a concussion right then and there. Though, it seemed that he agreed with you. Izzy would be fine. He’d definitely feel it tomorrow but he’d live.

The moment the two of you set foot on the Revenge, Stede was there. “Oh thank goodness! We were incredibly worried! I’m very sorry about all this! The storm really surprised us.” 

Luckily, Izzy’s head had calmed enough that he could pull away from you and lean against the railing instead. He quickly glanced around, the deck was messier than usual but didn’t look all that bad. His attention couldn’t help but drift back to you…

You were giving a quick report of everything (far more professional than Stede Bonnet deserved) before presenting him with the bag full of peaches. Bonnet was quick to announce that everyone was getting some kind of peach dessert that Izzy had never heard of as a reward for making it through a storm. Izzy scoffed. The reward for making it through a storm was being alive.

As Bonnet ran to the chef so he could explain this weird dish, you walked back to Izzy, leaning against the railing next to him. “I can handle everything up here. You should probably lie down.” You explained softly.

“Don’t need to lie down.” Izzy grumbled back.

You rolled your eyes. “What’s the point of having two first mates on a ship if you can’t take a break? I’ll get Captain Ed to drag you if I must.”

“Fine.” Izzy spat. A long pause. Izzy glanced around. Everyone seemed not to be focused on the two of you. “Thank you.” He said quickly.

You smiled. “Yeah, of course. Don’t worry about it.”

“...I’m still going to be a dick.” He confessed.

That actually made you laugh and Izzy couldn’t help but think that he liked that sound. “Duh. I’m not expecting anything to change. And I’m still going to give you shit.”

Izzy chuckled himself and nodded. “Wouldn’t have it any other way.”

You pushed off of the railing and waved goodbye. “Well, I’m off to ask Stede if I can borrow one of his shirts for a bit. See you around!”

“Good luck.” Izzy replied, both of you well aware that you were going to be dragged into Stede’s wardrobe and not return for hours. You chuckled. 

Just as expected, the moment you asked, Stede’s face lit up and you were immediately dragged off into his pastel colored hell.

Before Izzy could even take a breather, Ed was all but leaning on his shoulder. “Hi. You’re going to lie down.” His voice held the same force as an order. Izzy sighed, well aware that resistance was futile.

As Izzy was all but dragged back to his cabin, with a promise that someone would go check on him later, Ed decided to talk. “So,” His captain began with a grin that heralded problems. “Nice jacket.” Izzy’s eyes widened as he realized he was still wearing your jacket. “Guess you guys really got to know each other huh?”

“Piss off.” Izzy grumbled but made no move to take your jacket off. “My clothes were wet.”

“Ooh! So they saw you naked too?” Ed teased and Izzy all but short circuited.

“I- Ah… My shirt and vest were wet.” Izzy clarified, somewhat shakily.

Ed merely hummed. Izzy knew him well enough to know he wasn’t done. “So… when's the wedding?”

“Edward.”

A/N: Izzy’s one of my favorite characters so I have to be mean to him. Also, I've gotten a few requests for enemies to lovers with Izzy, so, there will be more coming soon. (•̀ᴗ•́)و ̑̑