#staring the camera i feel ATTACKED OMFG

[holyfvkc]

[dekuneho]

sober ☆ ( ​prohero!katsuki x reader ) mdni | suggestive — liquid courage failed you before, too many times to count. this time, you're staying sharp.

mature content, alcohol/drinking, getting together, katsuki is such a boyfriend for someone who isnt your boyfriend, whipped katsuki my favorite, pov switching, 4k words

Katsuki grunts, scowling at nothing in particular. “Stupid.”

His phone vibrates in his pocket. Katsuki, pissed enough as he is, shoves a hand to squint at the message.

where r u???? hurry the fuck up. pleasee omfg

It’s from Flat Face. Figures.

eat shit and die im almost there

Without Katsuki to play the adult supervision, Sero remains the sober friend in outings, mostly because he can handle his liquor well. Sero badgers on with his texts, begging for Katsuki to hurry before they’re permanently banned at their favorite karaoke bar.

Sero follows up on a recent message with an image attached. Katsuki slows his steps to glare down at his phone. Sero’s real shitty at taking pictures, or it could be someone’s jostling him from the side. None of it matters — Katsuki’s eyes zero in on you lying on Mina’s lap, where the camera had captured you mid-laugh.

“Stupid,” Katsuki repeats, unable to tear his eyes away from your glee for a moment too long. He only snaps back to reality when his phone dims. He must’ve painted a manic picture, staring at his phone like a damn creep. Fuck.

He’ll see the real deal in a minute, but still, he saves the image in his phone gallery. That’s between him and his phone.

Katsuki ignores the crisp breeze brushing his bare face. His nose twitches, growing numb; he feels his hands ache in traces of pain that come to bloom when it’s met with a sharp chill. This feeds his irritation further, yet it’s telling that he continues to walk down the road, as if turning back home was never an option in his head.

The attendant appears relieved to see him; whether it’s from recognition of the #5 hero or the acknowledgment of this establishment’s savior from rowdy pro heroes, Katsuki will never know. Katsuki doesn’t even need to ask — she just hurries him to the far corner room where his shitty friends are situated. He mutters his thanks. She just tells him good luck. Damn.

Katsuki pulls the sliding door open and is instantly greeted by the stench of alcohol. Sero’s picture hadn’t done enough justice; seeing it in real life is worse. It’s like the aftermath of a nasty villain attack if it came in the form of piles and piles of beer and alcohol puddles and bar snacks all over the table. Kirishima’s knocked out on Sero’s shoulder, drooling. Jirou is also fast asleep, taking an entire couch, leaving Sero to huddle uncomfortably on the edge of a corner. Mina’s holding the microphone, but nothing’s playing; she’s just singing shit. You’re laughing at Mina, clutching your stomach.

He nearly stumbles over a leg belonging to Kaminari, who’s sprawled on the floor for some fucking reason.

“The fuck happened?” he hisses, narrowly missing Kaminari's arm swinging to latch onto his ankle.

Cheers erupt from all around the table when they register Katsuki’s arrival. Sero looks like a single parent of five — which may just be the case.

Sero sighs. “It’s like I blinked and was left with this.”

Katsuki snorts. At least he knows how it feels. He's felt that way since year fucking one.

He steps over Kaminari's body, ignoring his cry, heading straight towards you. Raccoon eyes is talking to Katsuki — something about him being a jackass for bailing on tonight, not that Katsuki gives a single fuck.

“Killjoy. Boring. You’re getting boring, old man!” Mina yells at his face.

“Fuck off,” Katsuki says reflexively. “We’re celebrating again next week anyway. Don’t start with me.”

You beam at him, hands reaching out like a fucking child or something. He begins to pry you off Mina’s lap, but his hold under your arms gives notice to how you’re shivering.

Katsuki shrugs his coat off and drapes it over you. Looks like he’ll have to take you home himself.

“Sero,” Katsuki voices in a bite, glaring over his shoulder.

Sero rushes to service as Katsuki shifts to his back, leaving Kirishima to sag beside Jirou, their snores harmonizing. Sero drags you to settle on Katsuki’s back, where Katsuki quickly hunches over and shifts his palms under your thighs. You mumble happily, burrowing your nose into the nape of his neck.

Katsuki slings a heated warning in Sero’s direction before the bastard can laugh about it.

“Call a cab,” he grunts out. “Wake Shitty Hair up; he can help you with those shits.”

Sero flicks a hand in a mock salute.

It was a tedious process, but everyone managed, eventually. They all crash at Kirishima’s house. They’ll be fine. And if someone’s house burns down — well… they’re heroes, they’ll still be fine.

Katsuki adjusts his hold, exiting the bar as the cab drives off. He walks, the cold billowing a soft cloud in each breath.

“You awake back there?” he asks, staring ahead.

“Mm, you take such good care of me, Katsukiii,” you coo in his ear, your lips brushing over the shell of his ear.

He shivers, feeling warmth creep up the back of his neck. You laugh irritatingly, grating his nerves and fluttering his stomach. He bristles at the sensation, snarling nonsense that you don’t even listen to, too busy giggling over damn who-knows-what.

“Walking me back to your home, huh? What are you, my bodyguard? You big, strong … hunk of a man…”

Katsuki huffs in amusement. “Yeah?”

“Katsuki,” you drawl, your hand sliding over his bicep. “You’re so good to me. You take care of me, y’know?”

“I know,” Katsuki says, devoid of its usual snark. “‘s ‘cause you can’t do it yourself.”

“Ha-ha!” You lean your chin on his shoulder. “Yeah… yeah, you’re right. Wish you could … take care of me like this … forever.”

“Idiot,” Katsuki says, mostly to himself. You don’t respond either way.

Katsuki can fucking smell the alcohol reeking from your mouth. He’s about to tell you off, complain about your goddamn stink, but you’ve gone limp in his hold.

“Do you mean that?” Katsuki starts, and it’s met with silence. Then, snoring.

Katsuki doesn’t smile, but the by-passers would argue otherwise.

This is bad. Starting to get bad.

You got somewhat shit-faced drunk in hopes of making a move on Katsuki with liquid courage, but he’d taken care of you so well that you didn’t even have a hangover as an excuse the moment you jolted to consciousness. Your head is starting to clear up, losing its fog and illusion of confidence, and your brain is running off at full speed.

This isn’t the first time you’ve sobered up while in the warmth of Katsuki’s bed, an hour or so after he whisked you away from your shared friend group.

What the fuck am I doing? You want to punch something and scream, ideally where Katsuki can’t see you throwing a tantrum.

You turn to your side where Katsuki’s still in deep sleep, shoulders rising and falling at once like a decrescendo, slow and steady. It’s a heart-aching sight — achingly bare.

He has his back turned. You hold your breath and peek over, hands catching an inch away from Katsuki’s face, catching a view of his mouth open just a tiny bit for quiet snores to come out. It’s unbearably cute. He must’ve been tired, having to take care of your careless drunk ass all night, and it’s not even the first time.

This isn't anything new either — sleeping on the same bed. You remember it from the first night. He shrugged it off, saying he didn't want to carry your ass anymore. You're already makin' me take care of your dumb ass every time this shit happens — you expected me to go 'n sacrifice the bed I bought with my own money?

"Scandalous," you said, at the time, reeling from how defensive Katsuki had been.

"Not like I'm gonna do anythin' to you." Katsuki stared you down. "Why? You wanted me to?"

How embarrassing to resort to liquid courage and still fail.

This has to end. You are definitely not aiming to become a drunkard just to have a chance with your crush.

“Morning,” a gravelly voice mutters, breath hot on your face.

You come to the startling realization that you've been hovering over Katsuki for longer than you intended. His intense gaze arrests yours, tension hanging in the hair. Like doused in a bucket of cold water, you jerk away and flounder, half-baked syllables spilling as some attempt of an excuse. There is no other explanation for that — you were ogling Katsuki in his sleep.

Katsuki doesn’t smirk, but the mirth lighting in his eyes comes very close to it. He pulls you to his side, gripping one of your wrists and positioning it on the other side of his head. He adjusts your hold until you’re pinning him down.

You choke on your breath. “What—”

This time, Katsuki grins. “You're gonna strain your shoulders, idiot.”

Dangerous man, the primal instincts of your brain scream, flinching away, hissing. The hormonal side begs you to pounce on him and wipe that smug expression off his handsome face.

You quickly pull back, recoiling away, only to find yourself back up to the firm surface of Katsuki’s thigh, where he had lifted it in his wake. The shock sends a sharp jolt of aching pain at your violent reaction. You whimper and clutch at your head, dizziness inciting a pathetic: Owww.

“Don’t move so much, fucking dipshit,” Katsuki hisses, easing your hips down on his other thigh that’s laid flat on the bed. “Don’t you fuckin' dare throw up so goddamn early. Shit, it’s like, what, four AM?”

You sag against him, feeling at ease without the strain of your muscles holding your weight up. Katsuki’s like a mountain mass furnace — how nice. You don’t even register that you’re all but straddled on his thigh; if anyone were to walk in, they’d be well within their rights to assume the worst.

Katsuki cranes his neck as he reaches for a glass. You jostle at the movement, grumbling, and Katsuki mutters a quiet ‘sorry,' holding the water to your lips. You take gulps of water slowly, careful not to spill and ruin Katsuki’s strangely soft mood.

“Thanks,” you say. Katsuki’s actions and the weight of his tone — everything is off-kilter with the mood that’s just set. He’s really… “Sorry for the trouble,” you say in a hushed whisper, guilt settling in.

“If I didn’t want to, I wouldn’t,” Katsuki snaps, frown deepening. His eyes don’t convey the same ire.

“Yeah.” You nod, fond. “You don’t do anything you don’t want to, huh?”

Katsuki’s expression shifts. Just slightly, before it melts back into practiced blankness. “So?”

Everything’s straightforward with Katsuki. But even then — even then, he might not mean it in the same way as you’re hoping.

“I wasn’t that drunk, you know.” You want to look away, but you’re finding it difficult to even try. “I never was. I — I know this is the third time this happened.”

Katsuki lifts a brow. “You remember the first time you threw up in my car then?”

Your face erupts in flames. “I’m so sorry.”

Katsuki pushes you by the small of your back, closer to him. You swallow back an embarrassing noise, somehow quick enough to balance yourself on his chest before you plant your nose to his face. Katsuki’s ruby gaze pins you down, even when you’re the one on top of him. Dangerous, dangerous, leave, your brain yowls. Your body, your heart — stays incredibly still, obedient in the face of the man who's got you weak.

“Do you remember what you said last night?” Katsuki asks, several octaves deep. Roused freshly from slumber.

You squirm. His skin feels hot to the touch, even through his fucking black tank top. “I said a lot of dumb shit, Katsuki.”

“Do you mean them, then?”

You file through your memories, trying to pinpoint precisely what he’s talking about. Katsuki’s patient, seemingly content with keeping you on his lap, staring. You’re the humiliated one here.

“What did I say?” you demand, nerves constricting in your chest.

Katsuki pushes his torso up with a hand, inching his face impossibly close. The heat of his gaze spreads through your entire body. You’re sure he can feel it, too — hard to miss when you’re a lapful of a flighty cat perched on him.

His nose brushes against yours, eyes flickering down. Your breath hitches, caught in the hush of the moment.

“Katsuki?” you ask in a fearful whisper. Katsuki’s eyes snap back to meet your gaze.

“‘m hungry,” Katsuki mutters, leaning back.

Your face burns, his warmth lingering on the space before you. Your hands touch over your face, winded. Still aware of Katsuki’s intense gaze, you pull off from his lap, ignoring the scream of your headache as you dash to the kitchen.

You really thought he was going to kiss you.

No, maybe it's more accurate to say you were hoping for it. You almost pleaded for him to. Had he lingered, you would’ve thrown yourself all over him, begging, Please, please, Katsuki kiss me — I need you. How embarrassing is that? To need someone so badly that he's your waking thought, and yet you hate seeing him around?

Instead, the morning ended with Katsuki lending his shirt and driving you back to your apartment — a set routine — the third time. You talked to ease the tension, but it was a fruitless attempt at the question hanging in the air, dangling in front of both your faces. Katsuki doesn’t bring it up, so you hang onto the sliver of mercy he’s granted.

The week passes, and still, you aren't quite ready when another chance comes again.

You wonder if he’ll bring it up tonight.

This time, the party is in honor of celebrating Katsuki’s �� Great Explosion Murder God Dynamight — ascension to the Top 5 in the Pro Hero ranking. Katsuki’s not surprised, but most of the class is; he hasn’t laid off on the crude language, so it’s a wonder he even got into the Top 10 at all.

Most of your former classmates are busy with their duties and patrol, and Katsuki isn’t keen on inviting more than five people to his house. Unfortunately for him, Kirishima, Kaminari, Mina, Sero, Jirou, and Kaminari wouldn’t miss this celebration for the world — Villains be damned, it’s Bakugou Katsuki’s big day. It’s an unspoken agreement that you tag along. Katsuki also texted you that you were late an hour ago, so it’d be no use for anyone to upset Katsuki.

Of course, parties go hand-in-hand with alcohol. You had been avoiding Katsuki since that night, fleeing at every glimpse of blond hair. No one has noticed, except maybe Katsuki, whose eyes linger on you for five seconds longer than usual when you knock on his door.

His gaze sends a lick of heat down your spine, and the night’s just starting.

There needs to be a change of plans. If trapping him drunk doesn’t work after three failed attempts, then you have no choice but to do it sober.

That scrap of interest Katsuki had shown last week was more than enough encouragement. If you don’t end up confessing your feelings tonight, then that just means you’re never meant to do it at all — which would’ve been the easiest way out if Katsuki didn’t make it so hard.

“Hey,” you say. "I'm here."

“Finally,” he mutters. Your lips quirk up in humor.

Katsuki’s gaze slips from your collarbone to your thighs before flicking back up. A flame of interest makes itself known to you, to your chagrin. You’re no better: Katsuki’s dressed in low-hung jeans and a black fitted tank top under a striking red button-down, sleeves rolled up to his elbow. How can he make a simple nothing look so sinful?

Katsuki steps back, presenting the surprisingly neat get-together your friends have set up. There’s a buffet of food spread across Katsuki’s dining table — and because you know Katsuki well enough to be privy to his skills in the kitchen, you can tell he cooked all of them. There are banners spelling his name out beside Congratulations!, which must be Katsuki’s limit, seeing the lack of confetti.

“You’re here!” Mina shrieks, bounding over to encase you in a tight hug.

Air knocks out of your lungs as she squeezes your neck. You tap Mina’s back in distress. The room lights up with laughter, greeting you in turn. Kaminari moves to ruffle your hair, but his eyes catch on something behind you, and he pales and hides behind an amused Kirishima.

Katsuki heads to the kitchen island, alcohol lined up in a neat pile. You decide firmly that you are not getting drunk — you will power through with your plan, and that’s your mission for the day.

You pump your fist once and exhale roughly. Plus Ultra! Mina says you look stupid, dragging you off to the living room.

You’re squished between Kaminari and Mina, who throw their heads back for a shot.

True to your word, you denied any shot glasses offered, instead busying your mouth with the food Katsuki cooked. It's too bad you can't shut your brain the same way.

It’s tempting — really, really tempting. You haven’t been able to approach Katsuki, feeling too much like you should just forget about whatever plan you had for a confession and ride the tide back to normalcy. To get shitfaced drunk and leave it for you to deal with in the morning. But whenever you meet Katsuki’s eyes — it’s like you’re back on his bed, he’s too close for comfort, and you're reminded of all those mornings you wished was so much more last night, and the itch for alcohol is swept away.

Mina rests her head on the curve of your shoulder, her hair tickling your cheek. She asks, too nonchalantly for your liking—

“Have you and Katsuki fucked this week yet?”

You’re fortunate enough to have decided to skip alcohol for tonight, or else you would’ve died from choking on it. You glance over, hoping Katsuki hadn't been paying attention, but to your relief, he was absorbed in a discussion with Kirishima. “I’m — Have we — What?!”

Mina barrels on obliviously. “Had sex. Gotten busy. Under the covers. Hands-on learning—”

“No, I — What the fuck!” You shove her off. Mina sways in place; you'd feel sorry if you weren’t so scandalized. “Why are you asking me this?”

“Oh.” Mina tilts her head and watches your reaction thoughtfully. “No wonder why. Katsuki’s looking all tense lately.”

What the hell. “So?!”

Your shriek disturbs the peace of the party.

Kaminari chimes in to add to the blow. You lock eyes with Katsuki from across the room — must be the ninth time this evening — while Mina and Kaminari crowd in on you, relentless with probing curiosity. “I also thought he was acting like he was lacking some action—”

Blood rushes to your cheeks as you rip your gaze off Katsuki’s questioning stare. Then, in a low whisper, “Katsuki and I have never — we aren’t even—”

Kaminari turns his head, presumably to eye Katsuki. “Why does he look like he’s about to eat you up?”

“Do I look like I can read his mind?” You feel irritation like a blade on your nerves. “If he’s all tense, then he should get his dick wet — and I’m not involved in any of that.”

Mina gapes, disgusted. “What? You’d just let him fool around with someone else?”

“Why would that be my issue?”

Mina and Kaminari share a look. “Oh my god.” 

“You’re actually not together? Not even, like — just fooling around as friends?”

“No, Kaminari.” You hate how you sound defeated admitting that. “No, we’re not.”

“Fuck,” says Mina emphatically. “Fuck! You’ve got to fuck!”

“What — Why is this my responsibility? If he’s happy fucking someone else, let him be — You want him to loosen up, don’t you?”

Mina’s face shifts into a devious little thing. “You look like you want him to loosen you up.”

"That's so gross, Ashido."

Kaminari grins knowingly. “You jealous? Why’s that, huh?”

“Because I’ve been wanting to confess to him for two months now, and my liquid courage is nothing but a fucking cock-blocker!” you hiss in a frantic whisper.

“We’ve got to fix this!” Mina says, the hero that she is. “We need you to get laid!”

“Please tone it down,” you plead.

Kaminari tugs you down in a mock of a team huddle. You squirm uncomfortably; you can taste the liquor in their breaths. “What’s your game plan?” he asks. “Seduce him? Lock him up in his room, maybe?”

“I guess? I just want to do it sober.”

Mina suddenly leaps to her feet, yelling like a soldier. “Isolate him, then force your love!”

“Sober and preferably not unhero-like.”

Mina squeals, cupping your cheeks. “Do it tonight. He’s ready, I can feel it. He’s looking at you.”

Everyone in the room is casting glances at the three of you, but thankfully, Sero, Jirou, and Kirishima are respectful enough not to approach and disrupt the troubling conversation for your dignity’s sake.

“Of course he’s looking at me,” you wallow in mortification. “You’re making it too obvious. I’m going to get bullied.”

Mina smirks, her gaze trained ahead. “Yeah, you’re going to get bullied alright.”

You splutter, “What do you mean—”

Katsuki hovers over you three. “Let’s talk,” he demands, glaring hotly.

You’re back in Katsuki’s room, this damned space — the source of all your longing dreams and fantasies. The music from downstairs dials up, though it seems like it’s more out of consideration for you both. You’d been whisked away by Bakugou Katsuki once again, both of you blatantly disregarding the obscene gestures Mina and Kaminari were making as he pulled you upstairs. This time, however, you’re as sober as ever. It feels so different, like you're pulled out after submerging in the water for too long. Everything is so loud and clear.

Katsuki cages you against his door, never one to mess around.

“If I made you uncomfortable, punch me,” Katsuki says out of nowhere.

You’re speechless. “What?”

“Just — yell at me or some shit. Don’t start avoidin’ me, and don’t just move on to some other extra,” Katsuki mutters, deliberately averting your wide eyes. Move on to another— "I'll leave you alone."

"Why would I…" Move on to someone else? That's almost disrespectful to all the pining that's fucked with your head since this crap started. Move on? From Bakugou Katsuki?

"You were talking about it with those assholes."

Oh. He overheard all the wrong parts.

"I'm not gonna hook up with anyone else!"

The tension that has coiled tightly around his shoulders eases. Yet, despite this, he still hadn't made any bold moves to lead you to his bed, holding onto a fragile thread of hesitation that lingered in the air between you. Like you didn't just admit you're exclusively waiting for him.

His face twists up. “And, about that night, I wasn’t gonna — fuck, I’m not gonna do shit you don’t want, but I can’t read your mind. I don't wanna fuck this up.”

“What are we talking about?”

“The kiss, dammit — shit. Get it straight before I get the wrong idea.” Katsuki groans, resting an arm above your head. Is it wrong to be so endeared by someone clearly struggling to get his point across? “Do you mean it?”

You furrow your brows, arms crossed. This again. “What did I say, Katsuki?”

“When you said you wanted me to take care of you forever.”

What the hell? Did you really say that? Screw the exclusiveness of sex, that was basically a proposal!

Katsuki hooks a finger on your chin and forces your gaze back to him. Pay attention to me. Your eyes drift away for a second, catching on his ears, tinted ears — in contrast to his fierce scowl.

Your shoulders relax somewhat. Then you can't help but laugh.

Right, this is still just Katsuki. Your best friend, crush since forever; the guy who took care of you without even asking for anything in return. The guy who apparently has been considering your boundaries even though you've been seducing him drunk too many times.

“Why are you laughing,” Katsuki hisses; his frustration sounds more agitated than furious.

“So you did want to kiss me that morning?”

“No shit,” Katsuki huffs in a humorless laugh. “But, fuck, I’m not shitty enough to force you—”

“Katsuki,” you interrupt, “you should’ve.”

He falls silent, red eyes piercing yours searchingly.

Dangerous, your mind whispers, but you’ve never wanted to experience a thrill like this in your life. “I really wanted you to.”

“Yeah?”

“You’re lucky you took good care of me before I pounced on you drunk,” you say, and you mean it too. Your hands snake over his shoulder, tugging him down.

Katsuki’s breath catches in his throat, looking caught off guard. Wide-eyed and unsure. Cute. “Are you drunk right now?” he asks carefully.

“Never been more sober in my life,” you breathe.

He dives in for a rough kiss, one hand on the back of your head to push you deeper into him. You tilt your head to the side and — yeah, that’s better. Katsuki pries your mouth open, coaxing noises out of you that he each answers with a groan.

He smells like alcohol in his breath. It mixes with the scent of smoke — a dizzying, cloying scent that screams Katsuki. You want this more than Katsuki realizes. You want to sleep with it, to wake up to it.

“How much did you drink?” you ask.

“Just two light ones,” Katsuki says, and then one side of his lip quirks up. “Thought I had to take your ass home again.”

You smile coyly, tracing a finger over his bicep. “We can skip the foreplay — I'm already in your home, aren't I?”

Katsuki goes very, very still. Staring blankly. You hope you can convey it — you hope he doesn’t back out and pull away. You know he’ll get it. Katsuki is smart enough to pick up on your pleading gaze. His eyes burn; clearer, now, bright with understanding. 

I want this, too. You’re not sure if you or Katsuki said it.

You take his daze as a chance to push him to his bed, with you straddling legs as his eyes devour every inch of you.

“Get the fuck out of here if you don’t want me to fuck you right now,” Katsuki says seriously.

You settle over his thigh, mimicking that morning, hands splayed on his chest. Katsuki wheezes out a breath that sounds like he’s been slammed onto a wall, his grip latching onto either side of your hips right away.

“Take care of me again?” you ask.

“Holy fuck,” Katsuki says.

© dekuneho 2024. do not plagiarize, repost, modify, translate. do not input this to AI.

if you read my previous drabble ik i recycled it… but in my defense this one came first. thanks for reading mwa

[kirishimas-manly-eyeliner]

A full, entire list of headcanons for a day with:

1. ☼ waking up with him ☼6am-8am

i don’t know about y’all, but i like to headcanon that todoroki’s morning face is absolutely adorable 🥺

he doesn’t wake up like mr. perfect whenever you see him, but since it’s so early in the morning, his cheeks are just- so- squishyyyy

he looks like a fricken baby with the softest expressions ever

he stares at you and grins, still lying down and stretching his arms out

todoroki doesn’t look at his phone first thing in the morning, or even go to wash his face once he wakes up

the very first thing he does when he wakes up is to gently wrap his arms around your still body, as he kisses your scalp and holds you in the quiet of the morning

he likes to stare at your face, so calm and just so… at peace

he caresses his hand on your cheek before kissing your nose 🥺🥺

he wakes you up in such a gentle way that it’s just not even funny omfg-

i like to imagine that he opens up the curtains for gentle light first, and opens up the window for a cool wave of air

he takes your hand, “good morning, princess.”

“‘morning, my prince, but can we have like,, five more minutes-”

“i already know five minutes is the same thing as ten minutes for you. we should get up while we can.”

“alright, fine, but good morning to you too,”

his hair is ruffled in this ADORABLE WAY that makes my heART SIMPLY COMBUST

for breakfast, i LiKE tO tHiNK tHaT hE TakEs BaCon AnD sLapS iT oN hiMsELf-

i’m only like,, half-kidding, but uGH PLEASE GIVE HIM SOME SOBA AND LET HIM DO THE REST

man’s got everything handled, don’t worry ‘bout it 😌😌

for morning training, it starts as early as 7 in the morning

it’s nothing too intense, more of just him doing yoga

OMGWFHFIUHLIUF TODOROKI WOULD EITHER SLAY AT YOGA OR JUST SUCK IN GENERAL

NO IN-BETWEEN AT ALL

he literally looks like a fricken stick trying to bend and he’s just so awkward and flustured like ????

or either, man’s is SLAYING IT and hitting that tree pose, absolutely nailing the downward dog and killing it with the cobra

you laugh at him as he smiles, and expect him to do the,, lil,, lingering touches if y’all know what i mean ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

you had to buy multiple yoga mats because he ended up singeing them all on accident when he got flustered

and yes, his left side sets on fire when he’s flustered, and that is just the softest thing

2. ☏ [2/5] going to online school with him ☏ 8am-12pm, 2pm-4pm

todoroki makes sure that you focus, which is kinda a problem if you’re like me

…and you just don’t focus-

dw though, because if you ever zone out, man’s will be sure to be prepared because he can and will force you into getting focused again

he promises you a kith whenever you finish a class 🥺🥺❤️

“i love you, but i really don’t want to do this today.”

(honestly, i would like to headcanon that you probably do online school with rolling chairs, so you’re probably gonna be spinning whenever you get bored)

“and i love you, but here we are, my love. the day will be over before you know it,” he brings out the softest smile ever before cupping your face and pecking your nose

since todoroki has online class as well, he sits next to you to be able to hold your hand off-camera beCAUSE YAS

if you two ever get caught, his left side literally lights tf up

you thought man’s would be cool and collected the whole time, but NOPE HE’S JUST AS FLUSTURED AS YOU BABY

but you put it aside and say you were just petting your cat

todoroki also most definitely has some sort of fancy candle or a spray or whatever that he uses to stay focused

once or twice, he’ll most definitely spray way too much, so in one instance you had to go outside

in the backyard

and do your homework there as the wind blew all of your printed papers away

but anyways-

todoroki is on the top of his game to make sure that yOU STAY HYDRATED

IF YOU’RE READING THIS GO DRINK SOME WATER YOU MALNOURISHED AND DEHYDRATED ANGEL

he smiles at you whenever he sees that you’re stuck, and the way his eyebrows furrow in such a cute way just fricken asdfghjklkmnbvcxzaqwertyujhgcwjvhhviu

if you ever get burnt out, he plants a kiss on your forehead and holds you until you have to go to your next class, and gets you a wet towel to just feel better and *sparkles* fresher

oh and FIGHT ME, he most definitely opens up the doors and uses natural light rather than turning the lights on

if you ever feel frustrated or just feel too overhwhelmed, he takes your hand and asks you to breathe with him before pulling you into a hug

he would be such a good companion for online school, please keep him 🥺

3. ♨ lunch + study sessions with todoroki ♨ 12-1pm

SOBA

IF YOU CAME HERE AND EXPECTED SMTHN ELSE YOU CONFUSE ME

hear me out, todoroki literally makes the best soba in the world

expect him to use his quirk and make it colder bc no one wants warm soba

especially todoroki 😠😠❤️❤️

while you’re taking a nap or you’re trying to catch up on your homework, man’s is making absolute magic in the kitchen

when he calls you into the kitchen to eat, everything is set in such an aesthetically pleasing way

“todo, you made this?”

he’ll grin and say quietly, “no, my love. someone attacked and came in and made this and left through the window.”

he’s such a dork sometimes we love that

you also take a lot of photos before you eat, and the way your eyes light up fills him with so much happiness

“how does it taste?”

“you’re making me sound like i’m on master chef or something, one second, i’m still taking the photo!”

but when you do eat it, every time, even when you might not like it– you compliment him

and he literally acts like a child in that time and i think that’s ADORABLE

as for the study sessions, he makes sure that you actually focus instead of wasting the hour you guys have together

and even if you don’t want to, he drags your butt from where you were procrastinating

“it’s out of love.”

“out of love? babe i was having such a nice nap, are you kidding me?”

todoroki just grins as he opens up the windows for ventilation to study

i like to headcanon that he honestly probably listens to classical music when he studies

he despises jazz

i should literally make a list of headcanons for class 1a and their music taste-

he sends you little texts whenever he sees you get bored and go on your phone

4. ☼ ☽ [4/5] showers with todoroki + cuddling ☾☼5-8pm

you had a long day at work, and you were just getting things ready and preparing to go to bed

tired and exhausted, your body trudged towards into the bath for a much needed shower

you rubbed your eyes, drained and exhausted as your eyes locked with todoroki’s

…wait, todoroki’s?

“ah! i’m so sorry, i didn’t mean to, just-”

he peeks his head through the shower door, “no, i don’t mind it. care to join me?”

“i- wha?”

but come on, how could you reject something like this? you stepped into the shower before goin’ like “JEEZ WHY’S IT SO COLD????”

todoroki just stares at you, insanely confused, “…what do you mean?”

“you should at least raise the temperature a little, if that’s okay with you?”

being honest, todoroki genuinely forgot that cold showers weren’t a universal thing– it was only then that he realized, since the tea kettle incident, he’d almost by-default take cold showers

but he’d honestly do anything for you, so he raises the temperature as he holds you, his skin soft and the shower finally beginning to steam up a bit

todoroki uses the best shampoo smell in the entire world

just imagine the best scent in the entire world, but at first, you could only find a hint of it, and you thought that what you could smell was all you had

but then WABAM, one day an entire jackpot just shows up with everything

that’s what it feels like showering with todoroki

honestly, the man’s there whenever you need him

definitely loves to play with your hair in the shower, his hands are somehow so soft as he kisses your scalp

but shoto tries his best not to take too many peeks, and if he does he apologizes lmao

OH OH and he most definitely uses your lotion on one instance, so this one time when you saw him come out of the shower you’re just like,, “is that,, my lotion?”

he just stares and nods. “yeah.”

you laugh as you cup his face in your hands, “it smells good, i like it. but keep in mind i have to pay for that-”

he probably says it’s fine and uses endeavor’s credit card

even when you’re in the shower though and he sees your body for the first time, he flushes like crazy

what is this feeling??

he might see your stretch marks, he might see your scars, your acne, whatever it is you’re insecure about, but he gingerly and just so carefully kisses them all

“you’re… beautiful.”

for cuddling, he probably does the same thing– he holds your hand, and if he notices your scars, he kisses them and pulls you in closer to his chest

ALSO LIKE JEEZ MAN’S IS TOUCH STARVED

PLEASE GIVE HIM CUDDLES OMFG

please kiss his scar btw, he might be kind of sensitive about it, but it definitely makes him feel less insecure about it

he might be honestly going on his phone and looking through the news, or he might be looking at cooking videos ngl-

*cough cough soba*

he caresses your cheek, expect him to not know how to act at first

but then he decides to try making the first move and spoons you

bUT LIKE- I CAN SEE HIM AS THE LIL’ SPOON 😭

you make him so insanely happy

5. dating todoroki would include…

hate to break it to y’all’s, but man’s takes an eternity to ask you out

he probably went to the bakusquad for love advice

the poor bby is so confused, and at first, he’s convinced he has a disease

“i think… i’m allergic to y/n.”

(he’s still with the bakusquad,) “what do you mean?” denki honestly be tapping his pencil as he stares at todoroki

“whenever i go near them– i end up feeling weird, i suppose. i get nervous. i don’t know why though. i feel oddly giddy when i talk to them. should i get it checked out?”

at this point, mina and denki’s efforts to hide in laughs are in vain

when they actually burst out, they end up laughing so hard that they get tears in their eyes

todoroki is so confused, “???????”

sero def joins in with the drama, “i-” he stops to snort, “todoroki, have you ever heard of a crush?”

todoroki stands, dumbfounded for a solid minute before his ENTIRE left side just starts toasting

“i… i do like y/n. i like y/n. i like y/n. i like y/n.”

POOR BABY GOES CRAZY and repeats that statement for a solid minute yet again

he’s very confused and flustered at the same time

todoroki honestly tries asking the entire class what to do for his date, and everyone is saying something completely different:

“a movie theatre, kero.”

“an at-home dinner, maybe? you can save money-”

“study dates are very important.”

“✨ take her to the disco ✨“

“go to the amusement park!”

“maybe you two can just have a walk around town?”

“go to a strip clu-”

“SHUT UP MINETA-”

at the end of the day, todoroki’s left more confused than he ever was before, so he just decides to go for it all on his own

after a few more hours of contemplating his date and life choices, he decides how to ask you and where to take you

once he musters the courage, he asks you to meet him after class

you’re lowkey confused, but definitely giddy to be able to meet your crush again

at first, todoroki had this entire speech planned, but the moment he saw you, he stopped and forgot all of his words

“uh, do you want to eat food?”

took a while for you to realize what he was implying, and the way he was flushing and looking at the floor was just so soft and you nodded–

“you mean– go on a date?”

todoroki, still very much hiding his face, nods

“haha, i’d love to! where should we go?”

it takes him a while to compose himself again as he stares at you,

“would the ice skating rink be okay?”

so that day, that’s just what you did :DD

at first, todoroki’s kind of scared to hold your hand in case he ends up getting too caught up in himself

but eventually, you let him know that you don’t really mind as you head over to the rink

Elsa Todoroki for 2021™

man’s is a NATURAL

he be gliding everywhere, and you can see him for a split second, smiling as he skates around so fricken gracefully and i think that’s adorable

todoroki laughs into your ear as he pulls you in to help you balance

you two were skating normally, until you were suprised in the back of the rink as you fell over

“are you okay?”

“yeah, i’m good, don’t worry about it-!”

he pulls you up, his hands firm against yours

for a split second, you make eye contact for a few seconds too long

he finds himself lost in them, as he tightens the grip on your hands, your body still leaning against his arms as if you were in mid-salsa dance

he gazes into your eyes, before thinking: “this is the person. this is the person that i want to spend my whole life, an entire life with– they’re so strong, caring, kind… and there’s so much more to them than i thought.”

…before pressing his lips onto yours, and suddenly, everything stops

your mind is empty and blank, when you realize:

shoto todoroki is kissing you

and you were kissing him back.

you almost forget that breathing is a thing before you realize that you were nearly out of breath as todoroki pulled away before kissing you again, his hands cupping your face as you pulled closer against his chest

when you finish, you see that parts of his jacket were smoking after the kiss

literally smoking

“that was… that was… wow.”

todoroki laughs, “wow was right, a word i’d use.”

you’re about to talk again, when you hear screaming and cheering in the background

“LET’S!! GO!! Y/N!! AND!! TODO!! ROKI!!”

and yas– the entire bakusquad, willingly or unwillingly followed you there

even if it was a lot, todoroki’s happier than ever as he kisses you again

and all you could say?

that day the best day of your life.

thank you for making it this far, love!! this will be a continued series with bakugo + izuku coming up next, stay tuned :) to join my taglist for the next few characters, click here ^^ 

taglist: @cherry-cake-pies​, @xuxisushi-1​

[serowotonin]

LiPS𝐓1CK St4𝐈NS ! (💋)

❝ having lipstick and giving him a kiss and he doesn't realize he has it on his face until his teammates are all like 0-0 ❞ — @/luna-in-luv

++ fem!reader x oikawa, kuroo

| wc. 1.3k 

| note. djslsdf it took so long to edit this post T-T,,,,, when ur indecisive af and can’t decide on a post format :D anyways just wanna say reblogs are greatly appreciated and i hope u guys like this<3

( ➷ ); ― OiK4WA

another day of school, another day of.. well, another day of boredom

you had to admit though, school had become a lot more fun since you and oikawa got together;)

altho you were in different classes, you’d still pass each other in hallways and see each other during breaks

and ofc every interaction, no matter how small, definitely made your day brighter

the smaller interactions consisted mainly of random head pats as he walks pass by, or a smirk and a wink whenever you two make eye contact 

when there weren’t as many people around,,, maybe a hug or a kiss if either of you felt like it

and very rarely.. 

a makeout session in an empty classroom or staircase

its rare but it does happen

and it was happening… right now

school ended about half an hour ago and everyone either left or went to do their club activities 

which was what oikawa should probably be doing too,, but today he just “felt like going in a little later”

and so there you two were, in the dark corner of an abandoned classroom grasping at the other as if you haven’t seen them in years

idk how to describe a steamy makeout sesh okkk

anyways,, after about 6 ignored calls from iwaizumi tho.. you two figured it was probably time for him to go to practice

you two straightened yourselves out; cleared the ruffles from your uniforms, tidied your hair, etc.

oikawa texted iwa that he was on his way while you touched up your makeup

“you gonna walk me to practice?”

“of course,” you smiled. “altho i have my own club activities today too so i can’t stay and watch :( ”

“dont worry babe,,, just walking me there is enough” he replied with a grin

then he slung an arm over your shoulder and the two of you walked out of the classroom as if nothing happened

as you neared the entrance of the gym, you slowed to a stop and tugged at oikawa’s shirt

he turned and you leaned to give him a kiss on the cheek

“good luck with practice” you said before giving him a small wave and walking off

did you see the dark mark your lipstick left on his cheek?

yes.

were you going to say anything about it?

well,,,, you already turned to walk away and oikawa was already entering the gym

so no.

anyways,, as oikawa entered the gym, the first thing he saw was his beloved iwa-chan

looking not very happy

oikawa waved sheepishly as he turned his head to the side to look at where everyone else was

this for some reason made iwaizumi look even more not happy

makki and mattsun then walked over and snickered upon seeing oikawa

“ah was y/n here? why didn’t you invite her to watch hmm?~” makki teased

“she’s got club activities too you know..”

smh

they probably realize oikawa doesnt know bout the kiss mark

the three of them were just staring at oikawa like (￢_￢;)

and oikawa's just standing there like (◕‿◕)?

“can we go practice now..?” 

iwa: (￣︿￣) “wipe that stupid mark off your cheek”

huh? mark? he was pretty sure he wiped off any evidence from ahem what was happening earlier…

at this point some of the younger members started staring at them

and oikawa spotted them out of the corner of his eye and could practically feel the awkwardness in their gazes

he put a hand on the cheek everyone was staring at and removed it to see the same color that painted your lips

oh...

a slow smile spread on his lips at the realization of what you did

he laughed to himself

‘she’s gonna be the death of me..’

and with that he wiped off the remnants of your lipstick and hurried over to start practice

later tho, he asks you to kiss him again wearing that lipstick

and you do

and he snaps a selfie,,, which is now his phone wallpaper ;3

( ❣︎ ); ― KUR0O

today, you’re boyfriend, the one and only Kuroo Tetsurou, had a volleyball match

and ofc being the amazing, supportive gf you were, you were present in the stands, cheering him on

you didn’t get to meet or even talk to him before the match started, save for a few quick texts 

so when he came on to the court for warm up and spotted you in the crowd,,,

he gave a cheeky wink and wave

you could practically feel the confidence roll off him in waves but you knew, deep down, he was the tiniest bit nervous too

afterall, the opponents weren’t a weak team by any standard

they were strong and known for their relentless attacks

which were put to display almost immediately after the game started

nekoma held on though, and managed to put in a few attacks of their own to level the game

you could see the hard work behind each of the members’ skills, having witnessed a lot of it yourself

it was most clear in kuroo tho

and as he jumped to block another spike, you were on the edge of your seat

the boys just needed one more point… which came when kuroo shut down the last spike

you and the rest of the people in the stands around you erupted into cheers

and as they were leaving the court, you ran to steal kuroo away for a more personal cheer

the two of you walked the halls of the stadium talking abt the game

you were gushing about this block and that and he was smiling at your gushing cuz damn was his y/n cute 

N E WAYSSS,,, he received a text from kenma saying that they were all waiting for him at the bus

“i should go.. don’t wanna keep them waiting long”

“yeah.. you should”

before he could move tho, you tiptoed and placed a big fat kiss on his cheek

you swear you saw a blush on those cheeks as you backed down

he grinned and gave you a kiss of his own on your forehead before saying bye and running off

as he did, you realized you forgot to mention the lip-shaped mark on his cheek 

oops… its too late now ┐(︶▽︶)┌

anyway,, kuroo arrives all smiles to where the team are waiting 

and make no mistake they all CLEARLY see evidence of ur “little” kiss from back there

they just kinda,,,, don’t say anything at first?

kenma rolled his eyes and went back to doing whatever on his phone

yaku glared at it out of spite or some similar emotion

the others just choose to ignore mainly cuz they assume kuroo already knows and chose to keep it there

to them its just kuroo being a cheesy mf who was rubbing the non-single life in their faces or smth

ofc he has no idea tho

which just makes it all the more better when lev says

“y/n has nice lipstick”

and kuroo’s just like wtf ?? whatcha goin on bout my gf’s lipstick hUH

and he says that.. or something similar at least

and lev just points to his cheek like

“duhh i can see it right there”

he grabs his phone, opens the front facing camera, and is met with the outline of your lips on his cheek

and thats when he obviously started blushing

but then he just kind of smirked once he realized you knew about the mark

when yaku sees the smirk he went “OMFG JUST WIPE IT OFF ALREADY !! WE GET IT !! YOU ARENT SINGLE YOU GET KISSES STFU”

not like that but practically exactly what he was trying to say anyway

tbh kuroo’s a little reluctant to rub it off cuz idk,, he likes it ?? 

but he does anyway cuz they were still in public and there were teachers who were gonna come soon and all the other reasons

once hes comfortably seated in the bus tho, with a clean cheek, he sends u several texts

‘ saw that gift you left on my cheek… ’

‘ wouldn’t mind if u gave me more tmr afterschool ;) ’

| taglist. @lilikags @luna-in-luv ... send an ask if u wanna be added !!~

[maskedmochii]

Corpse: Never Saw You

Corpse x Fem!Reader

An idea popped into my head so I decided to write it. I'm not gonna just make up a random face and put it on him cause I find it so very disrespectful to give him a random face that looks the way you want it to. If Corpse ever says anything being uncomfortable with having fanfics about him, this will be removed. ENJOY!  I DO NOT KNOW MUCH ABOUT CORPSE SO IF I GET SOMETHING WRONG LET ME KNOW!!!!!

******

*BEEP BEEP BEEP*  At exactly 7AM the sound of my alarm rang through my room. I moved my hand my hand to find the noisy clock. Finally turning it off, I groaned as I sat up and slowly opened my eyes. Maybe staying up until 5 in the morning when I have to be at work by 8 was not a great idea. Oh well, too late now. I quickly got ready for day the ahead and sat down to eat my breakfast.

"Yo, did you leave some for me?" Wyatt, my roommate and best friend of 12 years asked jokingly. I must've fallen asleep cause I felt Wyatt hit me on the head with a spoon. "Y/N, you good?"

"Yeah, I was just up late." I replied, pulling my phone out. 7:37 it read.

"I'm gonna start taking your books and notebooks at night." Wyatt said, grabbing his food.

"Yeah, yeah whatever." I said. I put on a video and ate.

"You watching Corpse again?" he asked teasingly.

"No," I answered. "it's Sykkuno so hush." Wyatt laughed to himself, sat down and moved my phone over so he could watch too

*Le time shkip*

I checked the time on my phone 7:53.

"Shit! Wyatt I got go!" I jumped out of my seat, grabbed my keys and bolted out. I turned on my car and sped off to work. Once I got there I ran inside, put on my name tag, I did more things that you wouldn't care to hear. I made my way to the electronics section and walked around to see if anybody needed help. I came across a tall man with curly hair so dark it looked black. He was dressed in black from head to toe.

"Hello sir, do you need any help? I asked.

"No, I'm good thank you." he responded, his voice deep and raspy. It sounded so familiar. I accidentally let out a gasp of surprise when it hit me. Holy shit, he's here! What's he doing at Target, let alone the one I work at. He looked at me, confused.

"I uh, um, well you-if y-you need anything don't be a-afraid t-to ask." I stuttered. I felt the heat rushing to my cheeks.

"Are you okay?" he asked, a small laugh escaping his mouth. God, that's adorable

"Y-yeah, I'm just...your v-voice kinda surprised m-me." I replied. Please stop stuttering already!

"Oh, uh sorry 'bout that." he said.

"Don't worry about it," I said. "it's cool."

"On second thought, I'm trying to get a new camera for my sister. Do you have a preference on what I should get?" he asked, looking into my E/C eyes.

*le time shkip because I'm lazy*

"Thanks for the help." he said.

"No problem Corpse!" I said cheerfully, well I was cheerful until I realized what I said. "I mean um, oh God uh." He just stared at me, a hint of fear in his eyes.

"You know?" it was more of a statement then a question.

"I-I'm sorry, I d-didn't want to say anything to s-scare you away." I said, looking everywhere but at him. "I promise I won't tell anybody, I'll pretend I never saw you." we stood there awkwardly for a few minutes when he let out a small breath.

"Please don't tell anybody. I'm not just saying this for me. I don't want people attacking a pretty girl like you to get information about me." he said. He's trying to help the both of us, God he's nice wtf! Wait, did he call me pretty? Awww I nodded my head, finally looking at him and smiling. He returned it and I could feel my cheeks warming up. He laughed a bit, enjoying the affect he had on me. I was burning now. Why's he doing this to me?!?!?!

"I guess I have to go now." he said, his smile slightly falling.

"Oh, uh well, have a good day." I said, starting to turn away.

"Wait," he started. I looked back at him confused. "could I maybe get your number?" I felt my cheeks get warm again HOLY SHIT, CORPSE WANT'S MY NUMBER!!!!

"Uh, yeah. Sure." He pulled out his phone and handed it to me. I hesitantly put my number in and gave it back. I gave him another smile before going back to work. OMFG I JUST MET CORPSE HUSBAND!!! HE ASKED FOR MY FREAKING NUMBER! AHHHHHHHH!!! I finished the day with a spring in my step, definitely the best day ever.

******

"Bitch, I'm home!" I shouted, entering the apartment and closing the door.

"Hey!" Wyatt greeted, giving me a side hug. "How was it?"

"Great, very very great." I said cheerfully.

"Really, what happened?" he asked.

"I got a customer that was really frickin' nice and they just made my day." I answered.

"That's cool. Wanna play Mario Kart?"

"Grab me a White Claw and five minutes, let me go change." I told him. I sprinted up the stairs and into my room. I shrugged off my work clothes and threw on some sweats and a tank top then made my way downstairs again. Wyatt handed me a controller.

"I'm gonna kick your ass." he joked, selecting his character.

"You say that everytime yet I always win." I said, choosing mine.

******

I grabbed my phone and scrolled through Instagram for a bit. When I was about to put it down, it buzzed. Looking at the text I started to blush.

Unknown Number:

Unknown Number: Waddup Baby ;)

[mtvswatches]

Wynonna Earp 3x01 Blood Red and Going Down

Click here for previous recaps!

Stray thoughts

1) Oh, Wynonna…

She’s taking a holiday from dealing, happily vacationing in the land of Not Coping. When she breaks down, it’s going to be awful…

2) The idiot revenants are mocking her about her baby, they truly are stupid. Yep, she’s sweeping the floor with their asses.

3) Jeremy grew a mustache wtf.

He’s going full-blown bromance with Doc, isn’t he?

4) Doing a power walk with your posse…

EXPECTATION…

REALITY...

5) Who the fuck are these super extra, grill-wearing, purple-smoke hipsters?

The girl just touched the Sheriff and he invited them in and holy hell! They’re vampires! We got vampires! How did I not immediately guess they were vampires when I described them as extra and hipsters? Of course!

They’re very subtle…

So, just with a touch, they can glamour people? Is that it?

6) Waves and Nicole are in bed, and they’re all jokey about Nicole’s marriage and Waverly’s make-out sesh with Rosita, so I guess they’ve already worked through their issues. It would’ve been very interesting to actually see them work it out, and not just have this post-coital love bubble.

7) Why is this turning me on?

I guess it’s also turning them on a little bit, so we’re all on the same team… That is, until Doc brings up their baby, who is 19 weeks by now. Ouch.

8) She really wants to make things right with him… I guess my ship is not dead yet…

He won’t touch me unless we’re training and he won’t talk to me unless he’s angry. So I keep him training and angry.

So he’s obviously still not over the “giving up the baby” thing, which makes total sense. But how is Wynonna feeling? I’m guessing she’s absolutely wrecked, hence all the drinking and partying. I wonder when or how the show will address this. 

9) Hmm. Waverly brings up a memory about their mother, but Wynonna doesn’t mention how she’s been seeing her. I’m guessing this is a Big Secret that’s bound to come out during this season, right? The question is, why did their mother leave and how and why did Wynonna keep in touch with her?

10) Nedley is wearing a scarf around his neck and I’m guessing he’s been bitten.

11) Well, someone enjoyed a good ol’ feast, didn’t they?

Nedley was very adamant that “they didn’t do this”, that is to say, the vamps. And now Nicole is saying that these massacres have been happening since the 1920s, carried out by a group self-ascribed as the Cult of Bulshar. Cool. Cool cool cool.

12) Well, some light has been shined on those final scenes from the season 2 finale. Nicole, quite conveniently, waited nearly 5 months to tell Wynonna and Waverly that when Mercedes mentioned Bulshar it rang a bell, and Dolls gave her some BBD files – the ones we saw her holding in the last scene of the season 2 finale. Waverly seems to have no issue with this, but Wynonna is definitely taken aback by learning this information just now. I think she feels she hasn’t been let in on some key information about the demon that has been after her family for ages. Of course, Nicole and Dolls were probably just trying to protect the Earps and figure out if they could fight this demon without endangering them. But it is kind of odd that Dolls has chosen Nicole as his confidant and that he’s purposefully withholding information from Wynonna...

13) Nicole seems to be triggered watching the whole crime scene, which coupled with the fact that she mentioned having heard the name Bulshar before probably means she was either A) the daughter of one of the people attacked by the cult, or B) witnessed one of these massacres as a child, or C) both.

14) Cool, Waverly and Nicole have both been glamoured. And the vampire boss bitch told Waves she needs them as “tributes.” Is this some Hunger Games shit?

15) Oh, sweet tween Jeremy…

16) So…

Is their mom in a mental hospital or in prison? It looks like a prison, but she also looks a bit… deranged? But can it be a prison? We saw Wynonna meeting her in a mountain or something like that… Anyway, Wynonna keeps asking her to tell her more about Bulshar, but she won’t budge. She doesn’t trust Wynonna will be able to break the curse and she fears she might endanger Waverly.

17) The vampires want to turn Doc into one of their own. The only catch, in order to prove that it’s really him, he has to endure torture. I don’t know who is in charge of the recruiting division in this vampire undertaking but that’s not how you lure new recruits…

18) Okay, so it’s a prison. But what is she in prison for? And why does Waverly seem to believe she simply left them? Okay, Wynonna just answered my question – their Dad told them to hide the truth from Waverly, which makes sense when she was a little kid, but I’m betting she’ll be super pissed when she finds Wynonna has been keeping this tidbit of info for almost two decades?

19) Wait, what did I miss? Dolls just turned towards Wynonna all meaningful looks and what-not, he said “Wynonna”, they stared at each other, and then he just got off the car – and left his cheeseburger. Who the fuck does that? I hate it when characters do that shit with food in movies and TV shows! But seriously, what did I miss? Was this a “Dolls almost confessed his feelings but thought better of it” moment? Or was it just his lactose intolerance kicking in...?

20) Cool. So now, everyone but Wynonna and Doc is under the vampires’ influence.

21) So, the Vampire Boss Bitch and Doc have history. Go figure. She called him an asshole, so she must know him pretty well.

22)

23) So everyone has been glamoured, pimped up, and now they’re taking down Wynonna. I guess it’s all in Doc’s hands, now.

24) So, the vampires’ plan is to either turn or eat everyone in town. And everyone is super cool with it because they’ve been glamoured. Except Nicole seems to be remembering something, she’s called herself a survivor, the survivor… of one of the Cult of Bulshar’s massacres, maybe?

25)

I thought Dolls was glamoured, too. He’s either telling the truth or he’s setting Wynonna up.

26) “We’re gonna need more stakes.” Wynonna is going full Buffy and I’m fucking here for it!

27) Not… your best… zinger, Wynonna…

28) Vengabus, ooh, that reference is carbon-dated! And I instantly got it, what does that say about me?

29) OMFG, when these vampires get staked they turn into purple dust! But… wait… when they arrive, they do it surrounded by a cloud of purple fog? Does that mean they use other vampires’ ashes to give some pizzazz to their entrance?

And as each vampire gets staked, the glamoured people become unglamoured and they are starting to kick some vamp ass! I mean, look at Nedley!

30) “I will not get ate while tied to a stripper pole.” You know, good for you, Doc, we all need to set goals for ourselves. And that’s as good as any.

31) Oookay…?

She told him they’ve done things to her she doesn’t want done to him, and asked him to stay in the Vengabus, but of course, he didn’t.

32) He just jumped through a window and staked a vampire who was about to eat Nedley and now they’re smiling at each other and slowly walking towards each other and I’m dead!

They look so hot, why aren’t they kissing already?

33) Wait, is this Bulshar?

Is this how they’ve shown the face of the Big Bad? An underwhelming reveal with little warning?

34) These two…

They’re finally acting amicably, without angry training or silence treatment. Wynonna feels elated that he’s having a drink with her again like they used to, and they toast to Alice, which is the elephant in the room. I mean, who better to understand how each of them feels about giving up their daughter than each other? They really need to be each other’s person for this.

35) YES!!

My OTP is alive!

(it kind of looks like Wynonna has a mustache, though) 

36) Hahahaha! Dolls’ face when Wynonna’s compares Waverly’s “warm and tingly” description to peeing in the shower…

37) So, Dolls is egging Wynonna on to talk to Waverly, I’m guessing about their mom, and he can’t help but take a jab at her for choosing Doc, and I thought he was over the whole fighting with Doc over Wynonna? I guess not.

38) Okay, I totally saw this coming:

NICOLE: I’m starting to think there was a Cult of Bulshar survivor once. And it was me.

39) And just when Wynonna was about to tell Waverly about their mother…

And now Waverly is being dragged from the wreck and taken away?!

I did not see that coming!

40) This was an interesting season opener, with a much lighter tone than I expected and barely touching on the unresolved issues from last season. Bulshar seems to be the Big Bad, but for one, his reveal was lackluster at best. Suddenly, the camera cut to his face and that was it. He was just standing there. Not too ominous for a Big Bad. Nicole is about to be given a Big Backstory, so I guess that will be interesting to find out, although I think I would’ve been completely fine with her just being a regular human who stumbled upon the supernatural, you know? Jeremy is still having a bro crush on Doc, and I love it, especially because it goes both ways (I totally caught Doc telling the revenant that Jeremy is a vegetarian, which continues to cement the fact that they know each other very well, they’re buddies!) Waverly and Nicole seem to be on solid ground, but I wonder how figuring out where she comes from will affect Waverly’s relationships with Nicole and Wynonna. All in all, a solid, fun episode, although probably not one of the show’s most memorable ones. Very excited to see where this season takes us, though.

40) Hope you enjoyed my recap, and, as usual, if you’ve got this far, thank you for reading! If you enjoy my recaps and my blog, please consider supporting it on ko-fi.Thanks!

[five-wow]

9.15 reaction under the cut!!!

is it just me or is every vaguely spanish speaking villain nicknamed “el diablo”? but hey, so far the only thing we’ve seen him do is tip well, so i’m inclined to not hate him too much, to be honest.

we’re barely a couple of minutes in and rachel is flirting. that is... flirting. at least danny looks slightly confused about it, omg (and hey, same) (but you know what the sad part is? i actually really love this premise of rachel and charlie taking shelter at danny’s during a storm and it could be so nice to see danny have a good relationship with his ex, but i don’t, as in do not, want them to turn that relationship into something romantic again, which clearly the show is angling for at the moment)

i’m glad they mentioned grace, though! no disappearing kids this time around! yay!

it’s kind of funny to me that the show keeps using “hpd doesn’t have enough man power so let’s send tani and junior out there to help them out” as a reason for why they’re doing hpd work, because i don’t actually mind, but... is calling on two people from five-0 who never even graduated the police academy actually going to do something about their problem in any meaningful way?

a shady guy who is staring at people from a car and says some cryptic spanish things on the phone!!! i think we’ve found a second Bad Guy, gasp

now he has a gun AND a knife. subtle.

not an actual complaint, but as a european sometimes i’m randomly reminded just how intensely American this show is, gosh. bad guy from random non-us country who has KILLED people, HUNDREDS, and death would be TOO GOOD for him so we need to put him in our WORST PRISON. [insert random speech from steve about a Good Navy Man who served his country and had a picture perfect american family that died]

tani and junior’s banter on the phone while they’re both driving through the storm is giving me life, aww. love them

there’s some heavy danny/rachel flirting and. i have SUCH conflicting feelings about this, because on the one hand, as an isolated scene, completely cut loose from all context, i actually think this is cute and the actors are good together and i like it? but there IS context and that means that this is a VERY BAD IDEA and it makes me extremely nervous. at least charlie comes to the viewer’s rescue with his reminder that he’s there too and he needs food, dear parents, you can’t feed him with misplaced sexual tension

random fbi guy has been chasing el diablo down for ten years and “that man cost me EVERYTHING I CARED ABOUT”. i’m so sorry, five-0 writers, because i know this was probably meant as very serious and gripping and you did your best, but i keep having to laugh at how perfectly, beautifully cliché this is

jerry and lou performing first aid on the wounded officer was a nice scene! i’m not sure how realistic it was, but i like that they took the time for that. usually random extras who get attacked either just die or are immediately whisked away into an ambulance or another random extra’s waiting arms.

charlie being put to bed is always sweet!! (and i like the parallels with that time steve put him to bed - more evidence for the Steve McGarrett Is 100% A Real Parent To Danny’s Kids argument)

fjdkfdjkfd oh my GOD this MUSIC after rachel implied they could use danny’s bed together WHY

and then they’re playing a dice game together instead of having sex. fjdkfjdk this is the GOOD kind of fake out, haaa.

not being able to hear your prisoner when he screams for help is kind of not great, oops

so they can’t keep their prisoner in the cell they had him in until now (because it’s full of gas) and they can’t keep him in the hallway, so steve says that their best option is to lock the guy in steve’s office. steve’s completely glass-walled office. are you... are you sure that’s your very best option?

lou’s story is nice!!! so far jerry and lou keeping watch over this injured guard might unexpectedly be my favorite plotline this episode.

of course all three of the fbi guys are taken out immediately so steve has to fight the Bad Guy all on his own in dramatic hand to hand combat. oh no, steve, babe

adam storms in just when steve is done. adam, my friend, your timing is awful.

i’m almost disappointed that junior came in and shot the guy that tani was fighting because i kind of loved that bit? tani managing just fine all on her own in that house full of people who aren’t very friendly towards her is my jam (although i will admit she was in a bit of a pickle there, at the end, so junior’s rescue might have been for the best :p )

i love charlie, omfg. he SHUSHES his parents (“i’m watching this!”) when they start up with some awkward nonsense about why they were sleeping on the couch together. thank you, charlie, because i didn’t want to hear it either. you’ve been all around wonderful this episode.

i’m not appreciating the meaningful looks between rachel and danny while rachel says “i had lots of fun”, but, you know, i can deal. it’s all been a lot less terrible than i was bracing myself for, i think? there’s been a lot of flirting but we haven’t seen anything explicit (no kisses, no actual sharing of beds, no literal “hey let’s get back together!” talk) and with a bit of willpower, it’s entirely possible to read this episode as very friendly exes looking after their kid together and having a fun night playing board games and falling asleep on the couch (with possibly some overt flirting from rachel, i’ll admit, but danny never really outright responds to that? so it could be interpreted as one-sided flirting, mostly)

there’s a knock at the door and it’s STEVE. AMAZING. adam could learn a thing or two from steve’s timing.

charlie launches himself at steve which is also very A+, and there’s a steve and rachel hug, which, unexpected, but i’m on board

steve: “also wanna make sure there was no... disasters, you know, natural or- otherwise.” I’M YELLING. that’s a jealous steve. you cannot convince me that wasn’t a jealous steve, or at least one that was unsubtly hinting “don’t date rachel don’t date rachel don’t date rachel”, especially with the camera cutting to rachel right after he says “or otherwise” while he talks about disasters that could have happened last night, holy shit

“that was a little awkward.” STEVE. I LOVE YOU

okay, this final scene i’ve seen, but can i just say that i absolutely love this??? i mean, a lot. A LOT.

“oh, i don’t call it a bribe. i call it pancakes.” YES, steve, you GET YOUR DANNY PANCAKES. EYES ON THE PRIZE.

and danny sputters and asks if steve is five after steve gives his very specific pancake order, but he GOES TO THE KITCHEN ANYWAY.

this is the happy end i didn’t even know this episode could have

final verdict: okay. OKAY. i’ve been very scared about how this episode would turn out, so maybe that has something to do with my feelings about it now because i’ve been expecting the absolute worst, but in the end i didn’t really mind it that much at all? most of the plots were pretty interesting, danny and rachel did some flirting but didn’t actually get back together (yet, because it is very obvious that they’re going there now, but i’m not thinking about that too much until it becomes an actual problem) and there’s absolutely room to interpret their interactions differently from what the writers probably intended (as in, room to ignore the romance they’re hinting at). and that last scene where steve suddenly turned up and got his pancakes?? that was perfect. 10/10 for that. best twist ending i could have hoped for, awww.

[seventeen-scenarios-blog]

Shit the admins say during DE in Singapore

Diamond Edge in SG was 2 weeks ago but we admins finally got ourselves together to watch our fancams/listen to the audio we recorded, and we noticed that we do say a lot of rubbish, so here’s a list of the nonsense we said during the concert!

Just a quick background: Admin Hoshit and Jihooned were sitting together and Admin Wooed and Scooped were sitting together!

Our hi-touch and Diamond Edge confessions 

WARNING: LONG POST AHEAD (also setlist may not be accurate)

**please excuse our singlish

PRECONCERT

Jihooned: I’ll hold the Joshua banner cause it won’t break

Hoshit: “what if my bong runs out of batteries and i gotta change during a song lmao wouldn’t that be funny” (HAH FORESHADOWING HAH)

Jihooned: our bongs damn noisy

/Jihoon and Hoshit could not decide between their biases and so chose to buy multiple straps/ the clanking of the bong bongs can be heard all the way from VIP to cat 4

Jun sexily walks up

Scooped & Wooed: “eh who that” “idk” “can’t see leh”

“OH FK” “ITS JUN OMGGG KJDFHALKSJDFHK”

Hoshit and Jihooned: “who’s that ah cannot see”

Jihooned: “is that wonwoo?”

Hoshit and jihooned after realising it’s Jun: “omg jun jun juN jUN JUN JUN JUN JUN”

Junnie: RIP, Birth - 29 Sept 2017 8:12PM. “Jun is beautiful.”

PRETTY U

Jihooned: “SEOKMINNNNNNNNNNN”

Hoshit: “SEVENTEEN SARANGHAE YEPPEUDA”

/Seungkwan’s 4 octave note, Hoshit really loses it, “BOOOOOOOOO SLAYYYYYYY BOOOOOOOOOO”

BEAUTIFUL

Jihooned: If my eyes were a camera, the only thing you’ll see is Seokmin

Hoshit: “look at soonyoung he’s so dumb why do i stan hi- LOOK AT JIHOON HE IS SO DUMB WHY DO I STAN HIM”

ADORE U

Jihooned: I’m tired already

Hoshit: “I’ve been tired since Beautiful, it’s my third time swapping my shake-bong-hand” (wasn’t adore u the 3rd song)

Jihooned and Hoshit; awkward silence: “we are two songs in” “yeah we’re dead”

STILL LONELY

Jihooned aggresively hits Hoshit: THEY DOING BACKPACK DANCE

Hoshit: “I STAN LOSERS”

AJU NICE

/Jihoon appears for his part, parts Seventeen like Moses parting the Red Sea, Hoshit: “FUUUUUUUUUUU- JIHOOOOOOO-” /gets hit repeatedly by Jihooned

SWIMMING FOOL

Scooped: /Zooms in camera/ “WHAt are yOU DOIng on the flOORRrRRrrR?”

Jihooned: /shrieks at chan/

Hoshit: /incoherent mess/ “SOONYOUNG SOO- oh my god i can’t i love him too much minghao help minghao is so cute they are all so cute soonyoung please i-”

Junnie (internally): “I LOVE THIS SONG but damn, i want the waterrrrrrrr versionnnnnnn” :-;

MIDDLE SCHOOL VCR

Scooped: /Sees young seungcheol in a wig/ “OMFG OPPAAAAAA”

Jihooned: SEOKMINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN

Hoshit: “I LOVE MY SMALL DUMPLING BABIES”

MANSAE

Junnie (internally): “ASDFGJKLL;;; LOOK AT JISOO AND JUN AT THE BACK HAVING THEIR MOMENT AHHHHHH”

Hoshit: “this is their third chorus repetition I love this song but my arms are tired plea- oh for God’s sake it’s another repetition”

BOOM BOOM

Scooped: “NOONA PEI”

Hoshit: “WHY SOONYOUNG SWEAT LIKE HOLY WATER”, a pause, “GIVE ME THAT HOLY WATER BLESS ME SOONYOUNG”

Hoshit and Jihooned: /been practicing for this fanchant since they were born, ready for this moment/ “CHOI SEUNGCHEOL YOON JEONGHAN HONG JISOO MOON JUNHUI KWON SOONYOUNG JEON WONWOO LEE JIHOON SEO MYUNGHO KIM MINGYU LEE SEOKMIN BOO SEUNGKWAN CHWE HANSOL LEE CHAN SEVENTEEN BITNAEJULGE”

Wooed: *fanchanting* CHOI SEUNGCHUL, YOON JEONGHAN HONG JI-- fuck i can’t do this.. Uh.. shit.. JEON WONWOO *more incoherent mumbling*… LEE CHAN SEVENTEEN BITNAEJULGE!

Mingyu & Vernon’s Staring Contest

When Vernon was staring into the camera my soul, Junnie (internally): “Ok it’s official. My bias for Hip Hop Team is Vernon.”

Hoshit: “why does Mingyu look so good whO GAVE HIM THE RIGHT”

Vocal Team VCR

Wooed & Scooped: “Ok time to go toilet” (BRUH WE GONNA GET KILLED HAHHA)

Jihooned: “LEE SEOKMIN STOP IT”

Hoshit: “JIHOOOOOON JIHOOOOOOOOON JIHOOOOOOO-”

WE GONNA MAKE IT SHINE

Jihooned: someone hold me pls

Jihooned and Hoshit, proud mothers shouting for their child: BOOOOOOOO SEUNGKWANNNNNNNNNNNNN BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Wooed: SLAY MY BABY BOO SLAY ALKJFLKAJFLKDA IM SO FUCKIGN PROUD OF YOU MY BROHEREIFPSGJKSJ

Junnie (internally): “YASS JOSHUA YOU LOOK SO TINY IN THE BIG CHAIR WOOHOO”

DON’T LISTEN SECRETLY

Wooed: *trying so damn hard not to sing along BECAUSE THIS IS HER FAVOURITE SEVENTEEN SONG EVER BUT SHE ALSO DOESN’T WANT TO RUIN HER FANCAM WITH HER UGLY VOICE*

Also Wooed after Seungkwan’s part: “I think I am crying” *Proceeds to lean against Scooped’s shoulders being emo af*

Jihooned clings onto Hoshit real tight when Seokmin opens his mouth

Hoshit: Why Jihoon hold mic stand so hot

Jihooned: That’s not a mic stand

Hoshit: Why Jihoon hold towel so hot

Hip Hop Team VCR

Wooed: “THEY ARE SO F***ING KINKY”  *erupts in a coughing fit*

Scooped: “rude rude Rude RUde RUDE RUDDDEE R000000000DDDDDD”

Jihooned: “MINGYU HANDCUFF ME PLEASE”

Hoshit: “CHOI SEUNGCHEOL DADDY AF”

Hoshit: “CHOKE ME PLEASE”

ITCH ITCH (언행일치/言行一致)

Scooped: “ITCHY ITCHY”

Scooped: “DIS SO LIT” /Headbangs/

Wooed: Jeon Wonwoo just dabbed he’s dead to me goodbye

Hoshit: “choi sEUNGCHOEL STOP” “why am I not Mingyu biased yet”

CHECK IN

Scooped: “SINGAPORE CITYYYYYYY”

Scooped: “AAAA COUPS HARD RAP COMING ITS COMING OH-F*** OH SHIT OH WOW F***” /dies/

Hoshit: “i hate choi seungcheol”

Performance Team VCR

“HOOOOOOOO”

“SHIT MINGHAO SHIT OMG”

“OH MY GOD”

Hoshit: AH- AH- AH- AH- AH- GODDAMIT CAN THEY LET ME FINISH SCREAMING BEFORE THEY GIVE ME ANOTHER HEART ATTACK”

Jihooned: ChanChanChanChanChanChannnnnnn

Junnie (internally): “bye bye bye bye bye bye bye bye bye bye bye”

HIGHLIGHT

Jihooned and Hoshit: “DO WE DO THE OT13 CHANT OR NOT IT’S JUST PEPO” “JUST DO” “SEUNGCHEOL JEONGHAN JISOO JUNHUI SOONYOUNG WONWOO JIHOON MYUNGHO MINGYU SEOKMIN SEUNGKWAN HANSOL CHAN HIGHLIGHT”

Junnie: “CHAN, HIGHLIGHT”

OMG

Jihooned: Why Chan wear crop top

Hoshit: /lost to the war, only knows how to headbang/ “WE’RE GOING UP YEAH OH MY GOD YEAH OH MY GOD”

*Chan attempts a stunt*

Wooed: CHILD CHILD CHILD NO YOU’RE GOING TO HURT YOURSELF BE CAREFUL.

CRAZY IN LOVE

hoshit just dead just rip woojireongi will be the death of her

Jihooned busy switching between Jihoon and Seokmin

Wooed: "OREUM OREUM” *mumbles* (bc she forgot the lyrics)

Wooed: *more mumbling* “BOOO.”

ROCK

Hoshit, still dead dying at the hip thrusts :YOU TAKE ME TO THE TOP AND STRAIGHT DOWN LIKE A GYRO DROP fukin lee jihoon what the heck who allowed him who allowed kwon soonyoung

Jihooned, every time before chorus hits: oh shit oh shit the body roll hold me

CHUCK

/remember the foreshadowing about the batteries THAT IS RIGHT LADIES AND GENTLEMEN; HOSHIT'S BONG BATTERIES DIED AS CHUCK CAME ON; cue hoshit desperately trying to change batteries to the beat of chuck while screaming CHUCK CHUCK BRR CHUCK

MY I

Scooped: “Will this be Korean or Chinese”

Wooed: “idkidkidkidk”

Wooed: “AAAAA ITS KOREAN ITS KOREAN KASJB AKJSDK”

Scooped & Wooed: /dies at Minghao’s flip/

Jihooned & Hoshit: korean korean korean korean korean /waits expectantly for the first word/ YASSSSSSSS KOREANNNNNN

Hoshit: “minghao bb i would like to see your tattoo when you flip, none of this tucked in shirt nonsense”

Junnie (internally): “I would like to thank Jihooned for showing me that glorious fancam for I wouldn’t be here today so see this with my own eyes omfg I lived for this moment I am not ready for this help me… the toilet paper… Jun… Minghao… help… DOLLA DOLLA DOLLA, KELANG KONGJI KELANG KONGJI”

IF I

Jihooned: “Hoshit hold my hand QUICK”

/Hoshit and Jihooned holds hands through the whole song/ *AH PEHHHHH AH PEHHHH OUR FAVOURITE AH PEH (we were referring to Wonwoo)

*Ah peh is a term used (affectionately, in our case) to refer to an old man

HABIT

Hoshit, confused screaming; not sure who to support louder: BOO?? JIHOON?? BOO!!! JIHOON!!! BOOOOOOOOO SLAYYYYYYYY BOOOOOOO- JIHOOOOOOOOOOOOO- makes lawnmower noises/

**lawnmower story will be explained one day

DON’T WANNA CRY

Wooed: “OH GOD JEONGHAN AND SEOKMIN ARE DANCING THIS HEART HAS NO DAMN SPACE FOR BOTH OF YOU PLEASE STOP”

Scooped: “I WANT TO CRY”

Hoshit: “ oh god it’s ending not like this please not like this it’s only been five minutes”

Hoshit and Jihooned: /inhales/ SEUNGCHEOL JEONGHAN JISOO JUNHUI SOONYOUNG WONWOO JIHOON MYUNGHO MINGYU SEOKMIN SEUNGKWAN HANSOL CHAN, ULGO SHIPJI AHNA

Emotional VCR

Hoshit: /WAILS, Cat 4 can hear her crying from VIP/

Jihooned/Scooped/Wooed?: HAHAHA we got friend zoned by Minghao

Hoshit: /more wailing, amount of tears can be used to fill 30 swimming pools/

HEALING

Junnie: OH SHIZZZ LOOK AT JUN CARRYING JOSHUA??? THAT’S SO FLUFFY OMFG MY LIFE IS COMPLETE.

Hoshit; notices that they are spraying water: “I WANT THE HOLY WATER I WAN- GODDAMIT SEVENTEEN TRAIN YOUR ARMS HOW CAN YOU ONLY SPLASH WATER 1 METRE AWAY WHAT KIND OF PUNY PEOPL- JIHOON IS CHASING CHAN GO MY BOY BE FREE”

Ending Ment

/When jihoon finishes talking/

Jihooned: Wts is he high on drugs or something

Hoshit: “i love seventeen”, she says, as tears stream down her face

Junnie teared up here when she heard Jun & Jisoo’s ment. But she couldn’t say anything because all the other admins were sitting far away. All she could do was try not to draw attention to herself.

END OF CONCERT

Hoshit: HOW DO I STOP STREAMING THIS AUDIO

Jihooned: Eh we still got hi touch

Hoshit: oh my God i want to die but i have to wait until after the hi touch

Junnie actually teared up again (what the actual heck) because she remembered Jun & Jisoo’s ment. (Ya’ll have to know, Junnie doesn’t cry often So this was a magical and emotional moment for her.)

Wooed & Scooped just sighed and hugged each other with happiness and feels everywhere

Aaaaaaa thank you for reading through this super long post full of our nonsense and don't worry, our hi touch experience + confessions will be revealed in another post one day~~

[peachyyluxx]

NCT Hyungs Reaction: Having Your First Kiss and Getting Caught!

Taeyong:

So your first kiss with Lee Taeyong here, the cutie patootie boy who can also be a rude man on stage. I feel like Taeyong is a hopeless romantic because he seems to have that side of him since he's sO GODDAMN CUTE-

i'm getting off track. Anywho, I feel like Taeyong would try to make your first kiss special. As in take you out to a nice picnic by the lake and watch the water ripple when you throw stones in it. He prepared everything himself, he even forgot to tell you about the date. So just imagine opening your door to a cutely dressed Taeyong, holding a picnic basket in one hand and a cute stuffed bear in the other one. He'd be pretty embarrassed that he forgot to tell you, but you assured him it was fine and you both went on the date.

So flash forward to when he decided to kiss you. His palms were sweaty because he was just so GODDAMN NERVOUS YOU LOOKED SO PRETTY AND HE THOUGHT HE LOOKED LIKE TRASH COMPARED TO YOU OMFG

But anyways, he was feeding you a fruit and saw that some of it's juices landed on the side of your mouth, so he wiped it off slowly with his thumb. He smiled softly, looking into your eyes and then leaned in, kissing you softly, letting his eyes close.  His lips were as soft as they appeared, his mouth moving in perfect sync with your own. His arms slowly wrapped around your waist, pulling you closer to his warm body, your fingers tangling in his hair.

Now let's get to the getting caught part.

Anyways, there you two were, having some lip action moment, and low and behold, the Dreamies decided "Hey, let's go to the lake today! It'll be fun, right?"

WRONG.

"Hyung?!" Poor Jisung had his eyes covered by Chenle, who had his eyes covered by Haechan, and so forth until Mark was the only one staring, trying to cover his own eyes, but he couldn't.

"W-what are you doing here?!" Taeyong would pull away, feeling embarrassment rise in to his face, taking the form of a bright red blush. You just awkwardly coughed, looking anywhere but the innocence-ruined Dreamies.

"We wanted to go swimming and-" Mark starts, but Haechan runs over, scooching next to you.

"Food! Hi! Nice to finally meet you (y/n)!" He hummed, stuffing his face happily with the great food that Taeyong prepared. Taeyong's eyes and yours met, sharing the confusion of the situation.

"..You won't tell the others, right?"

"Oh no we are."

Taeil:

Okay but this cutie will probably do it unexpectedly.

I take Taeil for like someone who does things on the spot but has social anxiety about the consequences. He's just an all around nice guy.

So, what I picture is, he'd take you on a date to the Aquarium and most likely do it in front of the fishies, because he thought you looked beautiful with the blue hue of light coming from the lights on the tank water reflecting on your features.

You two were looking at the fish tank, your eyes captivated by the beautiful array of fish, while his eyes were captivated by the beauty that is you. Your eyes lit up from sheer excitement from the fishes, while his eyes lit up with sheer love, watching as you put your hand on the tank softly, gasping to yourself as a fish rubs against the glass, right where your hand wa.

"Taeil, did you see that?! Did you.." You quickly turned to Taeil, excitement showing clearly on your face, but your slowly faltered with your sentence, staring into Taeil's eyes. They where filled with love and care, just for you. Taeil unexpectedly leaned in, capturing your lips against his own.

So, you two would be in the middle of the aquarium, having a beautiful first kiss right in front of the fish, when a camera sound goes off.

"awe cute." Johnny said, you two jumping apart. Taeil's face flushed in embarrassment as he ran around, trying to chase Johnny and delete the picture. Jaehyun just stood next to you, both of you chuckling at the scene.

"You're going to send that to me, right?"

"I will don't worry (y/n)."

Johnny:

okay time for the tol bean Johnny Seo.

I feel as though he'd make it as casual as possible, so maybe while you two were just chilling and playing video games together.

It would be in the middle of Mario Kart, an intense game of it, that is. He would have won against one of the members, jumping up and down in glee. While you were laughing and clapping at his sudden enjoyment of winning, you felt yourself being picked up by the string bean himself, his lips quickly meeting yours. The room would've been filled with gasps from the other members, not even knowing that you two were dating (or they're just over dramatic like that).

"Jagi I won!" Johnny said, oblivious to the fact you both jUST HAD YOUR FIRST KISS OVER A VIDEO GAME VICTORY, AND IN FRONT OF THE MEMBERS.

"..You know...you have a room. you should use it for this." doyoung said sarcastically, angrily dropping his game controller. Johnny then realizes what he just did, lowkey freaking out, but trying not to show it.

"I-I know! Psh, i just wanted to show you nerds who has a girlfriend."

Yuta:

Yo yo yo it's Osaka Prince Yutaaaa.

This cheesy ass muthafrucker would most likely make a hugeeee deal about your first kiss, wanting it to be perfect to a T.

You two would be out on the town, cuddling each other for warmth, since it was the winter. Snow was falling and you were watching the snow, your eyes shining with pure wonder as the snow fell on to cars passing by. Yuta would look down at you, a smile appearing on his face as a sudden idea appeared in his head. He bent down, pretending to tie his shoe, but he quickly made a snowball, throwing it at your back. You slightly stumble from the sudden attack, but you smirk.

"It's on!"

Que the 30 minutes you and Yuta spend running around town, throwing snowballs at each other and trying to catch each other. Though you were close to the dorms, you tripped and fell into a big pile of snow, Yuta laughing his butt off as you completely disappeared into the snow. He then helped you out, laughter still erupting from him as he wiped off the snow from your big jacket and your hair. As he put his hands on your hair and slowly ran his hands through it to get the snow out, a bright smile was evident on his face, his eyes looking down lovingly into your own. He'd lean down, stopping just before his lips met your own, giving a small but teasing smile. You rolled your eyes, smashing your lips to his, taking him by surprise by the sudden force you held. You both fell to the ground, not hurt from the fall since the snow cushioned it. You pulled away, chuckling to one another and Yuta nuzzled his nose against yours.

"Ew keep the PDA on the down low, bro." Haechan stuck his tongue out, walking with the Dreamies into the dorm building.

"My innocence is ruined." Chenle muttered, shaking his head disapprovingly at his hyung.

"You'll understand when you're older Chenle."

"I don't want to understand I just want to eat."

Ten/Chittaphon:

Cheesy to the max honestly. Ten is such a cute and cuddly dude, I see him planning to have your first kiss at the top of a ferris wheel or at the carnival.

Okay so, Ten and you would be at the carnival, having the bestest time of your lives because Ten is right there with you and who would't have an amazing time with this fluffball, and you both pass a booth. Ten backs up, seeing a big panda bear staring right back at him, calling out to him

"Yo Ten ya gotta get me. your girl will be so happy."

"Ten why is that bear talking?"

anYWHO.

Ten wins that bear for you easily, so now you're lugging around this HUGE BEAR LIKE BIGGER THAN YOU AND TEN IS JUST SMILING PROUDLY CUZ YOU LOOK SO HAPPY HOLDING THE CUTEST BEAR IN THE WORLD--EVEN THO IT'S NOT HIM--

*ehem* okay so you two get to the ferris wheel and stuff, ten slightly being afraid of the height, but it's nothing he can't handle, he has the most cuddly thing by his side, and you of course.

Once you two get to the top, the ferris wheel stops, giving you both a perfect view of the beautiful ocean below you. The sun was just setting, so it set up a perfect moment that Ten wanted.

"(y/n).." He muttered, looking down at you. You looked back up at him, the sunset reflecting on your eyes. He smiled softly, leaning down and capturing your lips with own.

"SEE I KNEW HE WOULD! YOU OWE ME 10 BUCKS WINWIN!" Yuta yelled, shaking the cart lightly, but WinWin holds on, fearing his life.

"I don't want to die remembering Ten and his girlfriend's kiss-YUTA STOOPPP!"

Doyoung:

okAY BUT LOOK AT MY CUTE YOUNG BUNNY BABY. THAT SMILE THAT LITTLE SHY  OMFG HE ISN'T EVEN MY BIAS BUT I JUSYGTM REG--

*ehem* okay back to the point.

I feel like Young Bunny here would be a little shy with everything that he wants to plan, to have it perfect, but it obviously will be spontaneous because he's just like that (when he opens up).

for some reason i'm getting beach vibes from him, so it'll be at the beach.

You both planned a beach date together, but the boys decided they wanted to go to the beach, so they tagged along. They promised to leave you two to yourselves, though. They just wanted a ride.

So you two are lounging on the beach, getting your sweet ass tans on, when Doyoung pulls you up, carrying you in his arms towards the ocean. You were wondering what he was doing, until he just. threw you in the ocean.

he freaking THREW YOU IN THE OCEAN LIKE WHOOPS THERE'S TRASH IN THE OCEAN NOW.

You got so angry and started to chase him around, the boys shrugging and continuing on with their fun cuz they said they wouldn't bother you. You tackle Doyoung into the water, FINALLY getting him wet but dayum his hair looks so nice just sticking to his face like-

Doyoung then grabbed you easily when you tried to run away, hugging you tightly and spinning your around. He then spun you towards him,letting his forehead rest against your own while breathing heavily.

"You're in so much trouble. It's freezing in that water." He muttered, pouting. You just smiled, leaning up and capturing his lips, Doyoung's eyes widening from being of guard, but he closes them and kisses back, wrapping his arms around you.

"...should we just..." WinWin mutters, Jaehyung awkwardly picking up the beach ball that was floating at your feet, waddling away from you two.

"We said we'd leave them alone.."

Jaehyun:

This bias wrecking hoe- i mean this lOVING boy would probably also be one for spontaneous kissing.

It would be after you two were coming back from a midnight date at the movies, Jaehyun walking up to his dorm. His arms would be tightly wrapped around you as he dropped you off, not wanting to let you go as you both were outside the dorm entrance door, talking quietly since you didn't want to wake up the boys.

"You better text me when you get home." Jaehyun threatened jokingly, you holding up your arms in defense.

"I will don't worry." You smiled, pinching his cute lil cheek. Jaehyun just smiled, continuing to hold you in his arms. Even though it was late, he didn't seem tired at all. He just wanted to continue to hold you in his arms, letting the the warmth of you two mix as one. Jaehyun looked down, feeling your head nuzzle against his chest. He smiled yet again, lifting up your chin so your eyes could meet. He leaned down, giving your nose a small peck, before kissing you. Your arms tightened around him and he held you close, smiling into the kiss.

"At least have the decency not to do it right outside the dorms, please." Taeyong's voice appeared out of nowhere, you two jumping apart quickly. Taeyong leaned on the wall, an annoyed look on his face appearing (at least you thought he was annoyed, he had a facemask on). Jaehyun got pulled in by Taeyong and before you both could say goodbye, Taeyong closed the door. "Goodnight (y/n)!"

WinWin:

Awe awe this bean finally.

Okay So i feel as though WinWin would plan the kiss so far that he would begin to get nervous.

As soon as you opened the door, the plan suddenly started to go awry. Everything he planned for the day just wnet bye bye.

He forgot to make a reservation, so you two ended up eating at a nice diner. He wanted to take you to the park, but turns out it was getting renovations for the playground, so you two went to the mall instead.

It was still a fun day, trust me, but WinWin just felt so down that nothing went as planned, as you saw how sad he was, so you took him to the bridge where you first met, because he always lights up in happiness just remembering that day, happy that he went to that bridge in the first place to make a wish.

"At least one thing will go right today." He joked, giving you one coin, then throwing his own into the river, closing his eyes and wishing the hardest he could. It was adorable, really, seeing WinWin's eyes closed tightly and his hands wrapping around yours as he wished. You then threw your own coin into the river, closing your eyes tightly and wishing the hardest you could ever.

"What did you wish for?" You asked WinWin, but he just shrugged sheepishly, looking down at his feet. It was a small tradition between you two, telling each other what you wished for, because it usually becomes true a few days later.

"I-It's nothing.." He muttered, looking down into your eyes. You smiled, giving his nose a small nuzzle.

"I wished for NCT to have all the success they could possible have because you guys deserve it." Now this made WinWin's heart completely melt, hearing how supportive you are of him. Without thinking, he leaned down quickly, giving you a small but soft kiss on the lips. Once realizing what he did, he went to pull away, but you pulled him back in, smiling into the kiss. WinWin smiles also, both of your heads resting on one another soo after.

"I-I wished for you to kiss me." He muttered sheepishly.

"WELL LOOKS LIKE YOUR WISH COME TRUE GOOD JOB WINNIE." Yuta clapped, WinWin screeching and hiding behind you.

"WAHHH HYUNG HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN THERE!"

"We've been here the whole time..we cane with you both today.." Taeil awkwardly coughed, trying to look anywhere but you two.

"...are you sure you di-"

"YES WE'RE SURE WINWIN."

[ramblingshit]

The Woman in Black - 1989 - 3/10

looks like the 1980s but with somewhat older-style outfits; exposition mutherfuckerrrrrr;

very slow, fluffy script; oh got the cut is just forward and back as they speak, now we’re close flipping forward and back when its their turn to speak i’m dying. exposition, telling other characters what the audience has already heard; each of these scenes are far too long with so much fluff, Jesus Christ the cuts just throw us into a completely different place with no transition its so abrupt and the jump cuts are infinitely worse fuck half of these are like .5 seconds long, they’re so basic its crazy. some j cuts all of the sudden and some decent direction all of the sudden on this indoors scene wtf lol. then back to awful cuts, apparently just outside and between scenes.

i can’t even focus on the story because there’s so much nonsense filming, writing and acting and jfc.

the 2012 version is only 5 minutes less but this one reaaaaally feels like its length while the 2012 one does not.

the house is just a grey house in a simple marsh, unassuming, boring to look at, the birds chirp, there’s a half-sunken cemetery nearby, the woman in blacks just standing there in broad daylight with a lil hat on her head, her skin like yellow tinted with red around her eyes kinda lookin like the wicked witch of the west, just staring casually at him they giving her a mid-shot and a close-shot and all, got some crooked shaped eyebrows, i think she’s angry? I’d be angry too with that ugly ass velvet donut on my head; she slowly sorta makes her way a few steps toward him, he sprints off and locks the door then turns on all the electrical lights in the house and seems alright; the rooms are tiny and clean cause she only just died (woman in black’s sister) - it’s really not scary - all white and beige with floral designs, boring frames with dark protraits; reminds me of the rooms at the thornton’s house and other old bedrooms i stayed in as a kid; fuck he’s really turning every single light on. he’s drinking again. we’re half an hour in and he’s messing around with some sort of recorder whistling into it and shit - omfg i thought that was leading up to a scare but no. telling the clues of the mystery in these weird cylinder recordings instead of the 2012 letters? he’s drinking again. WHOA hey we got an establishing shot and its a red-bricked house three stories tall with a big ass entrance way and pointed roofs and lots of windows am i missing something wait what happened to the grey house. there’s no scary music, its all light, there’s no suspense its like well here we are, now we’re here, now the marsh is water, there’s fog and horses and he’s nervous and there’s horses and women and children screaming yikesss ol mate looks mildly nervous, they must have hired him for his scared running and dramatic turns, NOW THE HOUSE HAS GREEN VINES ALL OVER IT. i mean he seems passionate about his role he’s tryin his hardest thats for sure. half of its filmed like a stage show - where’d the dog go. continuity needs to like actually be a thing. why do these candles have hats they’re on beautiful candelabras and now there’s more alcohol. for epople who have a butler and a maid on stand-by their tablecloth looks like a crumpled sheet and the lampshades look like they were picked up from the tip and they’re fkn crooked for godssake. we’re 46 minutes in and theres been maybe 25 minutes of actual story. he ran because he was afraid and that sits wrong with him so he wants to go back - now he’s ‘brave but not brave enough’. stubborn muthafucker. his rational friend is like lol you’re a moron, take my dog as companion he’s called spider for some reason. jesus fuck the cuts they get me everytime they’re scarier than anything else i’ve seen. unsurprised i could see the shadow of the camera. oh okay the grey house is the generator room out back that makes more sense. locked doors, ring of many keys but no key will turn. completely wasted mirror angles that were making me actually kinda anxious waiting to see something in them like damn son wasted opportunity. thrilling to watch this guy go through wads of paper not really looking at anything just pushing them around the great lawyer he is conveniently only finding and looking at plot-relevant things. kid crying mummy mummy while the lady just screams horribly - OMG NOW HES telling the recording exactly what we just heard and saw fuck sakee i love this movie its so dumb spoon feeding everyone - naw spider in his beeeeddd 10/10 best actor. nothing scary has actually happened other than weird lady staring constipatedly at him. he out here gon break his shoulder - sprint sprint sprint PACE PACE PACE – THE DOOR IS OPENNNNN ooohhwuuuhohhh and now he has an axe. he’s a fuck load more of a scardey cat than my main man harry potter and its the nursery - A BALLLLLLLL fell from the SKYYYYY and he doesn’t seem too fazed lmao. spiders just chillin on a chair like yep you’re in trouble. creepy old dolls. a kid just said 'hello’ and laughed, like friendly. 'hello?’  and put a toy in his hand. this is actually interesting. whoops the lights have gone out - PROBS CAUSE HE TURNS THEM ALL ON. nothing even scary happened, the kid said hi and clearly wanted to play then he sprinted away and now is panicking trying to find a torch where is he going its not even that dark back at the generator. cause god forbid- - OMG HE:S LITERALLY GO TTHE WHOLE HOUSE LIT UP mate why do you think it all went out omg im crying he’s freaking out about spider running off oh nah nevermind he’s fine lololol he was freakingggg outttt and then just chills immediately and goes back inside. i love this guy he’s trying so hard. the 70s lampshades are swinging from the roof. would be more eerie if it were actually dark and nah gonna just move over that back to him telling the recording exactly what we just saw. every fucking light. every FUCKING LIGHT. he’s lucky he doesn’t have to pay for electricity. this is the third time we’ve heard this crash and the kid and the lady screaming and he’s going angry about it cause its very noisy and he’s lost his mate’s dog whoops. lol whoops his mate found his own dog half drowned in the marsh and is just chill with it. wait this has all happened in a day?? this fuckin guy. ol mates got him rugged up and getting him outta there cause he collapsed in fright from finding the nursery trashed. that’s it. like yeah its spooky but come on man. is this the climax of the movie??? we an 1hr12min in. think they’re only breifly and vaguely mentioning that to see her means a kid will die and has died - how the fuck are you supposed to make her fearsome if you declaw her and take away that which threatens people: the fact she’s out there causing kids to die. floral bed covers. are they seriously not even going to show the dead kid. they’re just chatting. and again wa– holy fuck these people shes like neeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrhhh with a hogwarts cloak on and short curly hair with that yellow face and crooked brows, and he’s got his arms over his face, eyes shut just lying on his bed screaming - fuckin close ass shots i can see up their noses. now he’s taken ill poor mate. also he’s in a different bed?? and now he’s awake and talking some whack shit. has anyone called his wife yet lol. an awesome shot of just him sleeping. and another one. who’s this lady? oh its his wife. what’s she doing here i guess they did call her ahahaha. everything is so bright and blue and white where is the deeeeeath how is any of this scary its just so much chilling out and chatting and lol bye hope you get better have fun talking men. what. the house burned down? what. ol mate seems suss. HE’S SUSS. ol mate definitely burned that shit to the ground. who knows why he didn’t really seem sold on the whole thing but ya know. now they’re wearing like any old clothes they can find. and there’s a soldier too. and they’re training off into the sunset. that woman is not old enough to be this guy’s mother. what. we have cake time. pointless pointless scenes. ooooooooooooooooooooooo he got the ptsd from the horse clackity clack. no woman with hair that perfect sleeps without it in rolls or covered, not back then lol. where’s the deatttttthhh. oooohweeerrroooooo. whats in the box in the box whats in the box todayyy. acting is always 10/10 with this guy, especially the angst and strong emotions. he really doesn’t care for actually investigating these many papers he’s got in these boxes. um. he was in his office. and then the next scene was him entering his office and hanging up his jacket in his office????? wot. THE PAPERS AREN’T IN THE FIREPLACE MATE THEY’RE OUTSIDE OF IT. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH OH MY GOD HES MAD HES SETTING THE OFFICE ON FIRE HOLY FUCKKKKKKKKK MATE. dude you are so fired. fireman is like yeah i found this jerry can of parrafin you wouldn’t happen to know anything about that would you. omg omg he’s attacking his boss this is so exciting. i think he’s fired lol. can’t believe he’s not been arrested. what do you tell your wife lmao. how do you get references for another job in this career. her hair is so perfect. she wants to talk, he silences her with a kiss, conversation moves on, he silences her with another kiss - typical. now they’re boating. there’s 3 minutes left. are they gonna drown. omg the jumpcuts. SHES STANDING ON WATER. SHES JESUS. ahahhahahahahAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA DEATH BY TREEEEEEEEEE and i think they did drown omg ahahah my guy, wife kid and baby. that’s fuckin dark. last literally 1 minute of the movie just kill everyone off. what a shit fest i love it.

[adiseaselikeyouspreads]

They start meeting just about every day after school, at Regan’s house. The first few times, it’s a lot of demonstrations and a lot of Jason getting knocked on his back. He’s sorer than he’s been since he finished his physical education requirements.

It’s still worth it, though. Both for knowing he’ll have a better chance of defending himself, and for when he successfully gets out of Regan’s grip and feels a swell of pride, earns a big grin.

“You’re a quick learner,” Regan compliments, when Jason manages to successfully counter a grapple. Jason’s top is drenched with sweat and Regan barely looks tired, so that’s still a problem, but Jason can already feel himself getting stronger.

“Or you’re a good teacher,” Jason counters, using his shirt to wipe sweat off his forehead.

“Let’s go with both, then we can both feel good.”

Jason laughs a little. Over the course of the last week, he’s gotten increasingly comfortable with Regan. It’d been awkward to be around him without his binder on at first, but Regan hadn’t even seemed to note it. And it’s easy to get comfortable with someone who unquestioningly backs off when you call uncle in a sparring match.

“How long did it take you to get good at this?” Jason asks, going to get a sip of water.

“Well, I’ve been in sports on and off since I was pretty young.”

“So I’m as good as you were when you were eight?” He guesses.

“Pff. More like eleven.”

“That’s sooo much better.”

“Hey, if you keep up the good work, you’ll close the gap eventually.”

“Eventually,” Jason sighs. “Guess we should get back to work, then.”

The next day, he feels a bit like his arms are about to fall off. Lugging his backpack around all day is hellish. At least it’s a satisfying sort of burn. The kind he knows means he worked hard.

Still, he can’t help but be relieved that there’s no film club today. He gets picked up and dropped off at home and gets to flop down on the couch and just breathe. It’s a recovery day, so he’s going to do approximately nothing but watch T.V. Maybe study a little, if the news doesn’t stop popping on talking about the Camera Killer’s most recent video.

At least, that’d been the plan. His dad starts to fumble around in the kitchen, walks into the living room, back into the kitchen, then back out, juggling a number of files, floorplans, a thermos, his wallet, and his cellphone.  

“You alright there?” Jason asks, watching his dad struggle to sort through a couple papers.

“Yeah, just-” He checks his phone, quickly, then pulls some money out of his wallet and holds it out to Jason. “Some problem came up at the house I’m working on and I need to go check it out. Ask my contractor how it is going to affect the budget. I didn’t get to go grocery shopping, so just run down to the 7/11 and grab something. I’ll bring you late dinner when I get this worked out.”

“I…” Jason stares at the money, then looks up at his dad nervously.

His dad is confused for a second, and then the gears start turning. “Hey,” he says, sympathetically, “it’s only a fifteen minute walk there and back. I’ve got my phone on me, you’ve been doing your self defense stuff. Just make sure to go while it’s still light out.”

“Right…” Even though he takes the money, he doesn’t look too pleased about it.

“I’ll probably be home around eight,” his dad informs him before rushing out.

Jason puts it off for as long as he can, before he actually has to start worrying about the sun going down. Before he steps out the door, he messages Regan.

Jason: walking down to 7/11. let’s hope I don’t have to use my new skillset. :^/

Regan: you got this jj

Jason smiles a little at the nickname, wondering if he could make an equivalent for Regan. R.A.? No. That’s what you call the dorm advisor in college.

Regan: remember if a big guy comes at you, use his weight against him

Jason: what do I do if a small guy comes at me?

Regan: tell him you know dmitri and he’ll have to stop. short guy code

Regan: fr tho momentum is ur friend

Regan: hmm. maybe i should draft dmitri for short guy sparring practice

Jason: I feel like he would bite me.

Regan: he would definitely bite you

Jason: how would I explain that to my parents?

Regan: tell them ur new gf is kinky

Jason: I’m pretty sure that’s how you get grounded.

Talking with him is making this walk a lot less nerve-wracking. Constant communication, focusing on anything but his paranoia.

Regan: wat are you buying?

Jason: chips, probably. or ice cream.

Regan: bro

Jason: what?

Regan: bro youre trashing ur body

Jason: omfg. what healthy thing could i buy from 7/11!!

Regan: multigrain bar or some nuts

Jason: what swamp did your tastebuds crawl out of?

Jason: creature from the black legume.

Regan: dont diss legumes dude

Jason: I’m buying a slushie out of spite.

He walks into the store, hearing the jingle of the bell overhead. He’s got just enough to buy himself a slushie, a bag of chips, and a candy bar.

Jason: mission success- bought junk food without dying.

Regan: 🎉

Jason: now for the encore.

Jason steps out of the 7/11 and starts the short journey home. Drinking from his slushie makes texting a little harder, but he’s so got this.

Jason: so what’re you up to?

Regan: just got home from riley’s

Regan: gonna make myself a salad like a responsible teen

Jason: meanwhile I’ve got chocolate.

Regan: i should make a chocolate vinaigrette

Jason: you cook?

Regan: hell yeah dude

Regan: i dont know how to make a chocolate vinaigrette tho

Regan: that was a joke  

Regan: i guess i could look it up

Regan: i make a mean half moon pie i should make some for you sometime

Jason: I don’t know what that is but it has pie in it so I’m in.

He takes another big slurp of his drink and grins around his straw when Regan starts to ramble about how to make this dessert.

Then something is wrapped around his throat. A presence suddenly behind him, a taut rope wrapped around his neck, strong arms pulling back. Everything falls out of his hands when he yelps in surprise.

He wasn’t paying attention.

His mind races. Choking. How to- he tries to tuck his chin, but the rope is under it, that doesn’t help, this isn’t a choke hold.

The rope is digging in and up, any time he tries to get solid footing, another yank almost makes his feet almost leave the ground. He flails, elbows, grabs at the unknown assailant’s face. The more effort he exerts, the more his lungs scream in protest.

Unfortunately, he can’t do the same; his voice coming out rasped and restricted.

Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. None of Regan’s lessons prepared him for this.

He tries to dig his fingers under the rope, shift his weight to ease the pressure, throw off the attacker’s center of balance, but none of it works. His vision slowly gets dark around the edges. His brain is still on full panic, heart hammering rapidly. But his consciousness goes soft and for the second time in very few days, he blacks out.

Waking up this time isn’t like last time. It isn’t a slow climb out of a muddled state. It’s sharp, disorienting; he was in one place but now he’s in another.

And this place is very dark and this time there’s no Sidney kicking walls or silly harmless clocks.

There’s just frigid cold. Pale light coming in through high windows, casting long shadows. He can barely look around. He’s strapped to a chair. With mild horror, he realises it’s a dentist’s chair. Modified, his legs and arms bound. The bindings are tight. No silly amatuer stuff, no pulling at the right angle to get out. Fear seizes him. His stomach is doing flips.

He’s alone, for quite some time. He doesn’t know how long. The light outside is fading fast. He dropped his cellphone. What if the killer has it? What if he texts his friends, parents? No one will even know he’s missing. Not until tomorrow.

A door creaks from somewhere and he tries to twist and look, but his mobility is a little limited right now. There’s a sound of rolling wheels, along with heavy, booted footsteps.

“Hey,” Jason croaks, before he can even consider if it’s a good idea to speak.

“Mr. Joon-ho, you’re awake,” comes a low southern drawl from somewhere behind him. “I hope you had a nice nap, because we are going to be very busy.” The voice slowly rounds round until Jason can see its owner. It’s deep and rich, the kind of voice that would be soothing, if not for the fact that it is coming from behind what is clearly a mask of cured human skin.

The rest of his clothes look too normal. Jean jacket, plaid shirt...hunting gloves. He’s pushing a cart with what can only be described as an array of sharp tools on it.

That comes to a stop a good five feet away, but the man paces closer.

Jason can see his chapped lips and dark eyes through the rough cuts in the mask, hear his heavy, unfiltered breathing, imagining the humidity inside the mask; he feels nauseous, wants to cry.

“Let me out of here,” he demands, tries to sound insistent, but he knows how scared he sounds. He gets a laugh in return. A short one, a facsimile of politeness, like he’s chuckling at a dear friend’s witty joke.

“Bless your heart,” the killer says, and Jason’s skin itches. “Can’t do that, little buddy. You see, you’re a delicacy.” He plants a hand on Jason’s arm. “Surviving five murder attempts? That’s some kinda record. I’d love to let you marinate for a bit longer. Seen how you’ve been strengthening up. Would taste a lot better with some meat on you.”

His other gloved hand pats Jason’s face and Jason’s brain goes haywire as he realizes who this is. He jerks and tries to curl in on himself, but he can’t. He can’t protect his squishy middle bits from what this fucker is no doubt about to do to them.

“But let’s face it. You’re just a pit stop on my cross country tour. Can’t wait around any longer.” The Cannibal withdraws both his hands and taps his chin. “In fact-” And he’s moving back to that cart.

“Help!” Jason shouts, as loud as he can, jerking against his restraints. The sounds bounce uselessly off the walls.  

“Hey now,” the Cannibal says, turning around, walking back towards him with some nondescript item in his hand. Jason can only see the handle. “None of that. There’s no one out here, anyways. And you should save your voice. There will be plenty of time for screaming later.”

“Fuck you,” Jason says, throat tight. Before he knows what happens, he feels a burst of pain. The Cannibal just punched him in the face with a meaty fist. His head is spinning.

“Watch your language,” the Cannibal comments, even voice turning acidic for just a second. Jason laughs as he feels the blood flow from his nose, tastes it on his lips. This guy’s about to carve him up like a Christmas ham and he doesn’t want to hear him swear. Incredible.

The object shifts from one of the Cannibal’s hands to the other and Jason can see, now, through skewed glasses, that it’s a potato peeler. Just a run of the mill potato peeler. His stomach sinks.

“Any gourmet worth his salt is always going to sample his ingredients,” the Cannibal jokes as he seems to test the sturdiness of the peeler against his glove.

“Why do you do this?” Jason asks.

The peeler halts. “I already told you you’re a delicacy. A rare treat.”

“No, why do you do this?! This sh- stuff, why do you-”

“Well aren’t you precious?” The Cannibal asks. “You still believe in motives.” He presses the peeler to the side of Jason’s face. When Jason tries to turn his head, the other hand comes to hold him still. “I do it because I want to, and because no one can stop me.”

The peeler doesn’t rake down fast. It digs in, and carves, slicing off a strip on his right cheek in a slow, agonizing pull. It hurts, sears, like the world’s worst rugburn.

He can’t help that it pulls chokes and sobs from him even when he grits his teeth.

The Cannibal releases his face and takes the strip of skin between two fingers. Jason can feel his pulse pounding in his cheek, can feel the fresh blood.

Without preamble, the Cannibal lifts the sliver to the hole in his mask and pops it in his mouth, like it’s nothing, like he didn’t just tear it off of someone. Jason gags.

“Sorry to say, squirt, but I’ve had better,” he jokes, wiping the peeler off on a handkerchief he draws out of his pocket. “I can work with you, though.”

The Cannibal returns to his cart.

“Please don’t do this,” Jason begs.

“I worked up quite an appetite bringing you all the way here,” he answers nonchalantly, while examining knives, like he’s trying to decide which one will do the best job.

There’s a very loud sound from outside the room.

Like the sound of a door being kicked in.

The Cannibal tilts his head, like one would when confused. His hand slides to a particularly large knife and he takes it up, walking towards the door.

“Stay right there, peaches,” he hisses, sounding less like his fake-polite persona and more like an angry serial killer.

He opens the door and peeks his head out. Almost immediately, there’s a gunshot. He hears the Cannibal grunt and stumble back, but not fall.

Another slamming sound, probably someone kicking the door the rest of the way open, then a second gunshot. This time, there is a solid thump as the Cannibal hits the floor. A third gunshot comes anyways, and then there’s quiet. If Jason strains his ears, he can hear the mechanical rasp of the Plague Doctor, breathing heavily.

Jason closes his eyes, tears welling up. He doesn’t want to be relieved. He doesn’t want to be relieved that they’re here, but he is.

“Are you in here?” They ask, after a moment.

“What took you so long?” Jason responds, voice shaking.

“This is a big place.” They walk over, footsteps more hurried than usual. It’s the tall one. When they see him, they stop. Jason wonders if it’s really that bad, or if all the blood is misleading. Instead of commenting, they use their free hand to undo Jason’s bindings. He can’t help but note that they’re holding Christian’s gun. He doesn’t want to think about it.

When he’s free, he rubs his wrists and sits up, slinging his legs off the side of the chair.

“Do you need me to call 911?” Funny. It’s the first time they’ve asked.

“Do I need stitches?” Jason returns.

“Probably.”

He sighs, and pushes himself to his feet, despite the tremors in his legs. “Alright.”

The Plague Doctor returns to the body of the Cannibal, crumpled in the corner, and searches him. He doesn’t have a phone of his own on him, but he does have Jason’s. So they hand the phone to him and he gets to dial the number himself.

“911 operator, what’s your emergency?”

“It’s Jason Joon-ho. I was kidnapped by the Cannibal. The Plague Doctor saved me, but I’m hurt. I’m currently in…”

“In Warehouse number fifteen,” the Plague Doctor informs him.

“Warehouse fifteen,” he repeats.

The Plague Doctor turns to go.

“That’s not your gun,” Jason finds himself saying, before he can stop himself. The Plague Doctor looks at Jason, then at their hand.

“Better in my hands than in one of theirs,” they state.

“Better in no one’s. Better if you leave it here.” Jason stays firm.

They test the weight of the gun, like they’re still unfamiliar with it.

“Hopefully we’ll reach the point where I can give it up, soon,” they say, lowering their arm. That gives Jason pause.

“How do you sleep at night, after doing shit like this?” He asks.

“With all my windows locked.” They leave.

The police and paramedics come and his brain sets on autopilot. He barely thinks. Even when his dad gathers him up in a tight hug and apologizes.

Getting home feels weirder than after the previous attacks. He goes to bed without eating. No appetite. And as he lies there, he thinks about how every other time, there’d been some sliver of a chance, some way he could’ve hoped to have gotten out. But this time, he really would’ve died without the Plague Doctor.