#st judas

[pechebeche]

cleaning out files and i found my very very VERY original st judas outline, way back when the fic was still called "cleopatra" after the lumineers song that inspired it. i only got through the first three-ish chapters of the original outline before i switched to an Actual, Legitimate outlining style. but since ive been putting all of my st judas secrets out into the open, some original plans that were thrown away very early on

and some origins of some major emotional moments that i just think past peach was absolutely correct to portray how they did

[thensson]

On grief

I miss you

I've Been Thinking About Heaven a Lot Lately, Judas H. || How to Be a Writer: The Map is the Territory, Ramona Ausubel || Vernal Equinox, Amy Lowell || Aristos || As Long as There is Love, There Will be Grief, Heidi Priebe || The Wasteland and Other Poems, T.S. Eliot || Edna St. Vincent Millay

[kashilascorner]

for @queer-ragnelle May Day Parade. May 17-21: Grumpy Month of Kay {Seneschal Celebration}

I have been here since before you became yourself: a collection of Kays (and Arthurs)

Chulhwch and Olwen / Camelot (2011) ep. 1 / Vulgate Cycle: The Story of Merlin / La Morte D'Arthur (Sir Thomas Malory) / The Once and Future King, book 1 The Sword in the Stone (TH White) / Sir Kay's coat of arms / Matthew 16:19 / Under cover of darkness (The Strokes) / Arthur of the Britons (1972) ep. 3 / Vulgate Cycle / Camelot (2011) / Icarus (The Crane Wives) / Idylls of the queen (Phyllis Ann Karr) / Hey Brother (Aviicii) / The High History of the Holy Graal (aka Perlesvaus), trans. Sebastian Evans / Camelot (2011) / Alliterative Morte Arthure, trans. Richard Scott-Robinson / Icarus (The Crane Wives)

[licensedfool]

aw man turns out my doomed yaoi was actually doomed

[dramoor]

"Much of the modern world sees beauty as a luxury (which it so rarely affords). I grieve deeply when I hear the modern sentiment directed towards a beautiful Church 'that money should have been given to the poor.' These are the words of Judas. And those who say such things rarely give anything themselves. Beauty is not a contradiction of generosity."

~Fr. Stephen Freeman

(Photo © dramoor 2014 Church of Our Savior on Spilled Blood, St. Petersburg, Russia)

[thewistlingbadger]

If Viktor is Jesus because of the life saving miracles he performs on people then Jayce is St. Michael the Archangel because of the way he protects everyone

[crystallinemythos]

Judas Iscariot icon attempt, Halo-less version under the cut

[tomicscomics]

03/31/2023

The Last Supper, but Judas makes it weird.

Weirder than betraying God, that is.

___

JOKE-OGRAPHY: Jesus originally just says that one of His apostles will betray him.  In this cartoon, He specifies that the one who's invading His personal space is the betrayer.  John and James (to Jesus's right and left) both recoil at the thought and start arguing with the others about who could betray Jesus.  Meanwhile, Judas coyly says it couldn't be him.  Thomas presses "X" to doubt that.

[beautiful-belgium]

Joos van Cleve - Triptych with the Lamentation of Christ (1524)

[gnosisandtheosis]

Every year here in Brisbane we have the Lifeline Bookfest. It's a 10 day second-hand book sale that raises money for Lifeline, which is a free 24/7 crisis support phoneline. The bookfest is huge and I only had a few minutes to rummage through the books so my haul is rather modest this time around. Still I managed to score a biography of St Francis of Assisi, yet another book on the Gospel of Judas (yes I am dragon like in my hoarding of books on Gnostic texts), a Ken Wilber Reader, and a copy of Selected Writings on the Purification of the Soul by Saeed Hawwa (in Arabic). A mere AU$24 for the lot. I'm not a big Ken Wilber fan but I may want to dip into it at some point, I don't read Arabic but I hope to learn one day, the Gospel of Judas book and the Francis of Assisi biography will be good though.

[pechebeche]

some other things abt st judas that i dont think ive ever said before:

yes! did not abandon kristen. there was going to be a scene on aelwen's boat before they fought her where someone finally asked who fiona's god was and she revealed that her holy symbol said "yes!" in another language. when kristen's connection to her god was cut off by Undeath Shenanigans, kristen begged yes! to come back and help her. so it did, by finding someone and bringing them to her. (i debated making this a kristen/fiona fic, too, but i didnt want to make it look like i was just shoving an oc in)

gorgug's ongoing pain was a result of his subclass. in canon, they never really do much with the fact that gorgug takes on a point of exhaustion at the end of his rage, so i wanted to translate that into a chronic condition - something that would've been fine if he'd dealt with it at the time, but because he ignored it, became steadily worse until it ruined his body permanently. part of that was magically enhanced by the undeath stuff, but it was always coming. i wanted a metaphor for high school sports in particular, though of course it applies to other things. the last section of the story centered in more on gorgug, who had to come to grips with the realization that he wouldn't be able to rage in the final battle, and probably wouldn't be able to fight ever again.

fabian's and riz's fathers would have been fully, 100% dead by the end of the story.

aelwen and fabian's relationship was meant to be a direct parallel to riz and fabian's relationship - in both cases, fabian left the person behind to do what he thought was better for them without asking their opinion or informing them of what he was doing. this arc was meant to culminate with fabian finally being hit with the understanding that people around him are, for lack of a better term, "real people," who have lives and opinions outside of him, and in him making a different decision, allowing aelwen to do whatever she wants instead of forcing her to come back to elmville with them. this was ultimately a coming of age story for fabian.

also he wouldve lost his eye again. i just think its a really funny thing to be an ongoing problem.

[ahopefulbromantic]

I met the apostles after the Resurrection.

They are sad, lost, and i cannot figure out why. Wasn't it all tetelestai? Shouldn't they be the happiest they can be?... I see John gripping his new Mother's sleeve like a child, watching her back as if he's terrified to lose her even for a moment. I see James awkwardly hanging around them. I see Peter, his cheeks marred with tearmarks.

They all look to him, unsure. He's no less lost than the rest. "I'm going fishing" he finally says. He leaves "whoever wants to join me go ahead" unsaid, he knows they will anyway.

They return to their homes to change and get their tools. Not all of them. There are whispers behind me. "I don't have a home anymore," I hear. "I left everything to follow Him." There are soft, sad murmurs, there are sighs and pats on the back, finally there are several footsteps, fading away together.

I come to Peter. I call him Peter, the Rock, and that's how he knows. He's sitting on the floor in his room, crying, alone. "I betrayed Him..." It's so painful to see him like that. "He loves you." "I know, that's the problem! He loved me! He still loves me and I betrayed Him!" he wails. Then he slowly raises his head and looks to the distance.

"I should've been the one to hang myself."

My heart breaks in half.

"No... No, no Peter, no...!" I hug him tight. He weeps in my arms for a long while, after which he wipes his nose and gets up, shakily. "You're right. I gotta occupy myself with something."

He comes out to see a group of his brothers with nets, rods, and other fishing gear. His nose is red, his eyes swollen, his chin trembling. No one finds it surprising.

"Why are you all sad? Didn't He resurrect?" I ask one of them when we're finally on a boat. There's only gentle rocking and water splashing. No one else talks. No one smiles. No one enjoys it.

"He did," he says. "He came back from the dead and He's God and we are not worthy of Him. We haven't seen Him for a while."

"But didn't He say you were to meet in Galilee?"

"He did. But we've been here for a couple of days already and He hasn't come to us. What if..." He looks me in the eye. His voice is shaking. "What if He doesn't want to see us anymore? What if because of our betrayal and our sins He turned His back on us? That's what we deserve, isn't it."

I remember my neonatology classes. The nurse told us how 3-day-old children wouldn't stop crying after having been so quiet before. Their mothers wouldn't know what to do, scared something was wrong. But the moment the nurse takes the child in their arms, just like magic the baby calms down instantly. The reason for that was quite simple. Being born is the greatest shock a human ever has to endure. So naturally, for the first few days babies have to recover from it - that's why they are so calm, they're exhausted. After they gain some energy, they get anxious. See, this little human for their whole short life has been surrounded by their mom - they could hear her heartbeat, hear her muffled voice, share her nutrients, and be completely embraced by her body every moment. But after getting born they would suddenly have to spend time apart from her. They didn't know whether she would return so they would start crying, thinking she abandoned them when she was just a few feet away, loving them with all her heart.

It's in that moment that I realize: the apostles are the 3-days-old babies. And though my heart breaks for them, it can't help giggle a little inside simultaneously. For in my mind's eye i can see how in just an hour or so Peter, quiet, sad, mindlessly operating the net, this very Peter will be jumping with joy, crying laughing (no break from the tears for him), running around, screaming:

"He forgave me! People, you hear that?! HE FORGAVE ME!!!!"

[pinkishflowersilverycoin]

Wandering hermit of Hell

[sevenking]

Some Jesus and Judas

[whatevergreen]

San Judas Tadeo - El Greco, 1590 (Museo Nacional de Escultura de Valladolid).

AKA Saint Jude, the patron saint of lost causes and desperate situations.