#squirreler....nutter....

[skunkes]

have u ever considered squirrel smunker....or was he always meant to be a skunks.....

i have considered squirrel sona! squirrel is a cheye animal i feel, ive jst never done it bc people regularly confuse smunker for a squirrel anyway

[whereowlsknowmyname]

🌰🌰🌰

[sassyfrassboss]

Wait Meghan said she'd be willing to forgive Catherine? WHAT she really is nutter than squirrel 💩 isn't she 🤣🤣

Yeah. It was an article in The Mirror.

Basically talking about how awful Catherine was to Meghan but Meghan was willing to put that behind her and heal the breach.

[eri-potato]

I want yall to meet Firem and her trusty battle squirrel Mr. Nutters. I love them, they where for a new year one shot me and my friends did, and we won the fight and found the bad guy lmao.  She’s a happy go lucky gremlin and I love her.  She’s like...it’s a system where you can mix races and she’s the equivalent of half halfling half ratkin...basically. We were all half rat half something :’D Also HAPPY NEW YEAR! Wishing y’all a wonderfull 2023! 

[spacebookettes]

Essay      The Local Nutter

Husband: “i just want kids, i really do, i don’t know if i can let that go".

Husbandess: “i too deep down want kids, with you... but i won’t do it unless i can live in the middle of a meadow, in a little cottage and every day while im pregnant i want to walk barefoot on wildflowers... all after we’ve spent a year not drinking, exercising and eating organic plant based”.

Husband: “ok i can live without kids"

The Local Nutter drives down the dual carriageway, hedgerows and hedgerows and a gap, that she abruptly turns the car into, it’s not on Giigle maps so the driverless car has to be shown. The lane is well hidden that leads into her nut trees. She’d secretly spent years creating a nut forest, all the best ones. Squirrels everywhere, the orange ones. A little cottage. With well and solar panels.

The tide came in.

A Rat Race to the bottom.

The dual carriageway is strewn with burned out cars and potholes. None of the mutants ever noticed the gap in the now forest hedgrows. The Local Nutter is growing vegetables, eating nuts, drinking clean water and enjoying squirrels.

Peter Stringer

[forensicated]

Some more quotes from around series 18/19/20

They seem to be more Smithy (what a surprise!) Gina, Mickey and Dan than most...!

Jack: "Since I'm coming with you I'll drive." Mickey: "There's no need for that!" Jack: "Look - I don’t wanna pull rank on you! Get your jacket!" Jeff Simpson: It feels very invasive having the contents of your wallet photocopied. Mickey: Well you'll live - unlike some!

Gina "There was a time I could drink any officer under the table. You ask the Super at Barton Street, I've still got the scars to prove it. Alright, hands up, you win, there's a good girl. Now, call us a cab." Smithy *giggles drunkenly* "You're a cab" Smithy "Ahh but you've never taken on a Dale Smith before have you?" Receptionist "Can I see your ID again please?" Smithy *annoyed* "You can take a photocopy if you want!" Debbie "In future Smithy, when I make a decision about a C.I.D case, I'd like you to give me the professional courtesy not to question it." Smithy "I wasn't questioning it. You were wrong!" Smithy (to snotty receptionist) Thanks for your help! *walks off muttering* "It's good to know the NHS is in such safe hands" *After seeing Cam and Kerry hug* Smithy: Oi Oi! *Smithy leaning against the front desk - tries to escape as Mr Lovett enters* Mr Lovett: Hey - I want to report a crime!! Smithy: *mutters* I thought you might . . . The old squirrels been digging up your lawn again have they Mr Lovett?! Mr Lovett: Don't you be flippant with me, sunshine!!

Cam: Kerry helped me out … Smithy: I bet she did! There's nothing they like more then to catch us with our defenses down, makes us easy targets. As long as she didn't take advantage… Cam: Thanks for your concern Sarge, but she didn’t. She wouldn’t… Smithy: No? Well you obviously don't know Kerry that well *walks off* Smithy: *leant against the wall holding Andrew - DS McAllister’s son's - hand* Well I don't usually go a lot for kids but er . .he's quite handsome ain't he! Debbie: Would you mind having. . . Smithy: Nah - you're alright! *Talking bout Des and Reg* Gina: Des was his hero! Smithy: Yeah - who recently tried to kill him! *Smithy and Reg are guarding Niamh's body in the Chapel Of Rest - a security guard is patrolling - they think it's Des. Smithy charges at him and pushes him against the wall, pinning his arms behind his back* Reg: LEAVE IT . . TURN AROUND . . . *Smithy makes the bloke turn round* It's the security guard Sarge! Smithy: *Innocently* Is it!? . . .*lets go* Oh - sorry mate . . . your boss said he was gonna cancel you for tonight! Security Guard: Did he? Smithy: Yeah . . still er. . . no hard feelings eh . . . *slaps him on the back* Smithy: "So the brief says to this probationer 'Was that a yes or a no officer?' and as he opened his mouth to speak he threw up all over the witness box." Gabriel: "That probationer wasn't you was it Sarge?" Smithy: "Very funny." Kerry: "Des is just upset because the kid blew him a kiss before driving off." Dale: "Awww!" Des: "Very funny!" Kerry: "Men and their emotions!" *Arches eyebrow and walks off leaving Dale glaring.* Debbie: "Anything interesting?" Mickey: "Well if you get off on checking phone records yes." Juliet: "She's in a good mood" Mickey: "She's always like that when someone tries to pull her." Juliet: "Really?" Mickey: "Yeah - last night apparently." Juliet: "Anyone we know?" Mickey: "Well with Debbie McAllister’s choice in men it could be any number of psychotics." Juliet: "Oh come on, that's a bit unfair isn’t it?" Mickey: "She's always coping off with nutters. Husband ended up shooting himself. Juliet: "Yeah - I heard something about that." Mickey: "Tom Chandler was as sick as they come. But Debbie - she couldn’t get enough of it." Juliet: "Debbie was married to Superintendent Chandler?" Mickey: "Yeah. I don't know who I felt sorry for sorry for the most till the Super shot himself. Juliet: "Wow!" Mickey: "Anyone who gets involved with Debbie McAllister needs their head testing!"

Mickey: *bout Christmas* “I’m sure you had a lovely time with your family at Christmas. But some of us used to dread that poxy tree going up every year. Do you know, all it meant to me was me old man hitting me mother, me mother hitting me old man, and poor little old me on all fours hiding behind the sofa, begging them to stop. Happy bloody Christmas eh?!” *Kid noses in a folder Smithy: "You alright there?" Kid: "Erm, I'm, looking for PC Taviner" Smithy: *Closes folder* "Well you ain't gonna find him in there are ya?" *About the kid that steals the area car* Dale: "He left bout 20 minutes ago." Des: "Didn't you think of holding him till I got back?" Dale: "What for? Visiting a police station in a built up area?"

Man: (in hospital that Mickey and Duncan are visiting) Come on - get us a nurse lads? Mickey: (walking of with Duncan) Breaks your heart, dunnit Man: I heard that!

*Kerry trying to flirt* Kerry: *Sees hole in Dale’s uniform* “Aww look, you’ve ripped your uniform” Dale: “Yeah I did it on a fence. Don’t do that, you’ll make the hole bigger” Kerry: “Got someone who can mend it for you?” Dale: “I can sew” Kerry: “Well show me when you’ve done it, I’ll give you marks out of ten” *Kerry’s continued attempts to flirt, and Smithy’s first response.* Kerry: “Work smarter not harder, isn’t that what you say Sarge?” Dale: “I don’t appreciate it being quoted back at me though” Kerry: “What even when I’m right?” Dale: “Especially when you’re right” Kerry: “You should take it as a compliment Sarge; it means I listen to you!” Dale: “Nah, look, you’ve been working really well all round lately. Focused, intelligent. It’s good to see. Kerry: “As opposed to what? Earlier?” Dale: “Accentuate the positives.” Kerry: “You what?” Dale: “I’m simply swapping compliments with you PC Young; in fact, I may go as far as taking you out for a drink tonight. What do you think?” Kerry: “Don’t you have to ask me first?” Dale: *Rolls his eyes and clears his throat* OK, “Would you, like to come out for a drink with me? And I don’t mean with half the relief this time. Just you and me” Kerry: “When?” Dale: “Tonight.” Kerry: “Love to, yeah” Smithy: "I wonder if the Inspector would think it a good idea to go behind your Sergeants back?" Kerry: "Probably not!" Kerry: "You're down here cos you fancy me" Dale: "You don’t know what you're talking about!" Kerry: "Big brave solider Smithy. The only thing he can't handle is his own emotions. You're such a cliché mate, it’s laughable!" *Kerry starts to undress* Dale: "What you doing?" Kerry: "This is what you're after isn’t it?" Dale: "You what?" Kerry: "Sex without any strings." Dale: "You're behaving like a slag!" Kerry: "Oooh I love it! You treat me like a slag. But you don’t want me to behave like one. Tell me to stop." Dale: *Eyes her warily* "You're making a fool of yourself." Kerry: "Do you want me to stop? I will if you tell me to" *She pulls Smithy's tie off as he grabs her arm. Dale: "I've told ya" *She kisses him* Kerry: "Come on Sarge" Mickey: (To Jim) You’re their FLO. Shouldn’t you be washing up or something Mickey: Maybe it was Jack the Ripper, come back to terrorise the Larkmead Shopping Centre. Smithy to Des "No, I agree with Reg. If you want a pink panda sweetheart you can have one" Des "I don't want one!" *coy* "it's not my colour..."

Smithy: (to Andrea) We're like two lost souls on a boat. Andrea: what boat's that then? Smithy: I've got no idea... listen, listen Andrea: What? Smithy: It's not the size of the vessel... Andrea: No, don't say it! Smithy: but it's the motion of the ocean

Gabriel: Wonder where we'd have gone for my stag party... Smithy: *mutters* Some dive probably... Gabriel: Well it's usually the best man's job isn't it....and that'd probably have been you. Gabriel: I got jealous some times....it was always Smithy this, and Smithy that...and I was like yeah, alright Kerry... Smithy: Alright Gabriel...

Andrea (about Gabriel): You know he's covering something up Smithy Smithy: Well, that makes two of you

Roger: That could have been the shortest stint I've ever seen. Squished like a cat on your first day. Dan: You're all heart Roger: Oh, Me? I'm famous for it.

Smithy: *to Gina* But I forgot! You don't need any help from anyone, ever, do ya! Gina: ....I haven't got the big support network to fall back on! Smithy: The irony is that you have! You just won't let them!

Jack: Well you might think he's corrupt. But I know my officers. Liz: You didn't know about his affair with Andrea Dunbar... Mickey: The point is, he's married to the prosecution barrister. Jack: So? Liz: Which makes him uniquely placed. Mickey: His marriage his rocky. His mistress is dead. Liz: He's at home, feeling sorry for himself. Mickey: McGowan comes along, offers him a nice juicy bung. Liz: Manson uses his wife to gain access to the witness, who suddenly decides to clam up on us. Jack: This is all conjecture. Liz: It's a theory. For which we need evidence. Mickey: Which is where you come in, Guv. It would make things easier round here if we could have your co-operation. There's a couple of Neil Manson's cases we'd like to look into, for evidence of corruption. *Phil knocks* Alright Phil? Phil: Hello Mickey! Jack: Just excuse me a minute will you? Phil...*takes him outside* Did you know about Neil and PC Dunbar? ....Did you? Phil: *looks awkward before nodding* What's this about? Jack: We've got the national crime squad in there making a fool out of me and this department. Liz: *walks out and looks at them* Just going to get a coffee... Jack: I'm just off to the gents, *to Phil* I think you'll find you need to go too

Mickey: Guv Neil: Hello Mickey. What're you guys up to? Jack: *quickly* Shouldn't you be enjoying your time off? You're not going to have any when you get back here.

[posterdrops]

Reposted from @jeremykramerdesign Honored and Blessed to be able to work again with the great @railroadearth for this week’s Horn O’ Plenty shows in Stroudsburg, PA. 2 years ago, bassist @andrew_altman rescued a malnourished squirrel #missnutters - took her home with him and rehabbed her back to health. This week, as Andrew says farewell to the band, I wanted to illustrate what a storybook ending might look like - with Miss Nutters returning the favor and guiding Andrew safely back home… For inspiration, I had to look no further than out my window at the ever-growing company of squirrels we keep (and feed) around our own little treehouse 🐿 🌳 #design #posterdesign #illustration #gigposter #rockandroll #screenprinting #drawing #art #artwork #instaartist (at Sherman Theater) https://www.instagram.com/p/ClPLELSpYbm/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[matzsmith]

I'm exactly the same! I'll walk past a crowd without a second glance, but one dog? I'm all over it. There's something that wakes up inside of me. I just don't mind people at all, sorry. Time just doesn't exist when there's a dog in the vicinity. The world could be falling apart, but if there's a furry friend nearby, everything else can wait. I did, and let me tell you, it was everything you'd imagine and more. Puppies climbing all over you while you try to answer questions? I mean, I spent more time playing with them than focusing on the interview. You cent percent need to make it happen for your next project! Just put it in the contract "puppies or no deal." I'd watch it just to see you with a pack of pups. Poor little guy! I totally get that. When you see something so small and helpless like that, you just want to scoop him up and make sure he's okay. I'd be the same, probably trying to figure out how to sneak him home and nurse him back to health. Not sure if Bobby would like a little squirrel friend, though. Well, no one can tell you you can't do something so if you want it, go for it! No matter the "you're nutters" looks. Ohh, you've convinced me. Maybe one day you'll have a deer turning up for breakfast on your porch and you'll just have to adopt him. And I'd love to see that. You'd have your own little forest squad, and I'm sure your boyfriend would just have to accept his fate as second in line to the animals. I don't know if I'd want TikTok in my life. I can already tell it would awaken an urge in me I definitely don't need, plus from what I've heard that's a rabbit hole no one can ever get out of.

I will ignore a hundred people. But if there is one dog? You bet I’m stopping to say hello. Not that I tend to ignore people, but you get what I mean. Time goes completely out the window if there is a dog around. You got to do the buzzfeed puppy interview didn’t you? I’ve never been more jealous in my life. I swear, I’ll only sign on to my next project if they can guarantee that the promotion will include doing exactly that. No but I kid you not, he looked so helpless and dehydrated like.. I would want to take him home and help him. Ah wow, brilliant. What a good doggo, just trying to help out in the best possible way. I would’ve been very appreciative. Honestly at this point I don’t know if he would. He’s so used to my lunatic behavior when it comes to animals. I mean, he adores them just as much as I do. But I’m very much a gotta save them all kind of person and don’t really enjoy when people tell me that’s not actually possible. Yes and wouldn’t that be amazing? Disney movie huh.. you have a point, that’s fair. But I still think it’s a possibility. I’ve seen people take care of deers and even if they’re let back into the woods.. they keep returning to the house where they got help. I think the idea struck me when I was part of being on a bus that accidentally hit an elk and then seeing this deer being saved on tiktok. Maybe tiktok is the actual issue here. I’d have all the animals if I could, and I’m not even joking.

[ashy-ashy-ashy]

if i were in charge, squirrels would be called nutscrabblers. or nutters for short.

[hapapapa-go-noir]

Jessica was so fucking nuts this whole time that I never expected anyone to say anything to her until Annalise came through clutch af.

Labia like lead💪🏼 what's Jessica gonna do? Get fucking decimated?? 🤔 Or change into someone being decimated?

[lettherebemonsters]

I'm not the biggest Superman fan out there, but it's sad seeing him fight so hard to get through to General Eiling during the Injustice Gang WW3 arc.

Instead of working together to stop this plague from space destroying everything, Wade is so corrupted by his own hatred that he's doing everything he can to doom Earth.

Seeing a man who once fought for good (albeit with questionable ethics and morals) become to psychotic.....I wonder if Clark blames himself in a way. It was his team that locked the General away on 433-Eros to be stuck there indefinitely.

It was a desperate measure....but he definitely must have thought there had to have been another way that he and the others couldn't think of during a fight that was guaranteed to doom everyone on Earth.

[starseekersara]

I recently finished my Aziraphale doll repaint from Good Omens! I’m very happy with her and hope you like her too <3 You can watch the process here. 

...........................................................................................................................

Help me make Crowley: https://ko-fi.com/starseekersara

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Come yell at me: https://starseekersara.tumblr.com/

Become my mutual: https://twitter.com/starseekersara

Check out my instagram: https://www.instagram.com/starseekersara/

[labmonkeynumber9]

Two nutters surrounded by zombies! 🧟‍♀️🐿🐿🧟‍♂️ . Breba squirrel nodders made in Germany, 1940s design. @studiobrillantine in parkdale has a few left 😊 . #squirrel #squirrelsofinstagram #nodders #breba #germantoys #1940s #sculpture #nutters #zombies #togetherness (at Parkdale) https://www.instagram.com/p/CLkC37OgZlb/?igshid=1tu0t2sptk9me

[ask-wiltmichaels]

Mac and Jordan are two totally different kids in both appearance and personality, but I was wondering....have you ever seen Mac do something that reminded you of your creator? (maybe before the big reunion in the movie, when some internal issues still had to be resolved?)

Kind of? I mean, I’ve never seen Mac do something exactly like Jordan. But like Jordan, he’s a genuinely good kid. They’re both very generous even towards other people who are completely different from them. Like how Mac treats us imaginary friends like people instead of... well I don’t wanna say it, but let’s just say not all folks are fond of imaginary friends, is that okay?

Jordan loved to feed the stray cats in his neighborhood, even if some cats weren’t always friendly towards him. I was kind of reminded of that the other day when I saw Mac share his snacks with Fluffer Nutter.

But uhhh, don’t tell Fluffer Nutter I said that please! I’m sorry to ask that, but I don’t want her to think I’m comparing her to a cat y’know? I mean I know she’s not a cat, she’s clearly a squirrel and um... I’m sorry, I think I’m rambling again, sorry!!

[valkyriesexual]

Sent the ask about the motion to dismiss thing - apparently I got it wrong and there are only WaPo printers in VA (I'm not 100% sure but I just checked what was said and it only mentions printers). Idk if it's just bc I'm a layperson but this seems absolutely bonkers to me that this was approved somehow because... they printed the newspaper there?

have you seen the case where the coal mine baron sues john oliver for defamation over the nutter butter squirrel bit? that was filed west virginia. idk why the virginias have decided they want to be *the* dream location for defamation plaintiffs...

the aclu wrote an amicus brief in the bob murray v. john oliver case which may be the funniest legal brief i've ever read. the whole thing is worth a read. my favorite parts are footnote 3 ("anyone can have dreams"), the argument header "Anyone can Legally Say 'Eat Shit' Bob", and the quotes "It is apt that one of Plaintiffs’ objections to the show is about a human-sized squirrell named Mr. Nutterbutter, because this case is nuts.", "Bob Murray thinks John Oliver was mean to him, and he doesn’t want him to be mean again. While that is sad for Bob Murray, it is unconstitutional for a court to order such relief", and the single greatest use of a photograph inside a legal brief i've ever seen:

okay but i got a little off track there. i bring this up because, in the wake of Oliver winning his lawsuit against Bob Murray, his show did a segment on SLAPP lawsuits. the clip can be found embedded here, and Oliver discusses the virginia(s)' weak anti-SLAPP laws which allowed the depp v. heard case to proceed in the first place.

anyway. this doesn't really answer your question. the virginia court found that depp met the minimum contacts requirement, a civpro rule used to determine when it is appropriate for a court in one state to assert personal jurisdiction over a defendant from another state.

the seminal minimum contacts case, from SCOTUS and thus binding on all lower courts, is International Shoe (International Shoe Co. v. Washington, 326 U.S. 310 (1945), the Supreme Court held that for a defendant to have minimum contacts, the defendant needs some combination of the two following factors: systematic and continuous activity within the forum jurisdiction).

if i was an appellate lawyer working on this case, i'd certainly be looking at Calder v. Jones (a defamation case involving Florida & California). 465 U.S. 783 (1984). i'd be analogizing that the appropriate venue would be California for this case, as its where AH and depp lived during their relationship, where both their careers were, etc.

But if I was depp's team, I'd be looking at Thousand Oaks Barrel Co., LLC v. Deep South Barrels LLC, 241 F. Supp. 3d 708 (2017)(holding that a company that directed electronic activity into Virginia with the manifest intent to do business with Virginia residents by setting up an interactive ecommerce website accessible to Virginia residents and used that website to fulfill Virginia customers’ Internet purchases was sufficient to establish minimum contacts). Based on that wildly broad interpretation, you could analogize that WaPo prints newspapers that are delivered to Virginia residents so by choosing to publish her article in WaPo, now she's subject to personal jx in Virginia.

[if you found this post helpful or informative, please consider subscribing to my substack, it does take me a decent amount of time to research, write, and source posts like this, and substack subscriptions are deeply appreciated]

[sail-on-silver-girl]

Sand -- Fluffbruary Day 8 (sand, quiet, colorful)

It was a perfect day for the beach. The temperate early autumn, mid-week day meant children were in school, adults at work, and tourists…well, wherever tourists go after their summer stampede. Sherlock and John had the beach practically to themselves. It was mercifully quiet, save for the sounds of the waves.

The case that drew them so far afield to Formby Beach outside Liverpool had seemed like an eight, but had topped out at a six, leaving Sherlock to solve it before they’d barely stepped out of the rental car. Nothing was calling them back to Baker Street, and the pirate in Sherlock couldn’t resist the call of the ocean.

He was basking in the barrage of colours—the bright blue sky dotted with pearl grey fluffs of clouds; the deep blue of waters of the Irish Sea with a scattering of white-capped waves; the green of the tall grasses emerging from the dunes, the rust of the Eurasian Red squirrel skittering about. But it was the vast stretch of sand that captured his attention.

Sherlock breathed deeply and allowed his eyes to close, committing the image and feeling to memory. He could feel the tug of a smile tug at the corner of his mouth.

“What?”

John had noticed. Of course John had notice. John noticed everything about Sherlock since they had become a couple. Sherlock opened his eyes to see John staring intently at him, as if he were trying to memorize Sherlock’s expression, just as Sherlock was memorizing the scene before him.

“Here’s a sight you don’t see every day. The great Sherlock Holmes, sitting quietly on a beach wiggling his toes in the sand.”

John’s feet were buried in the sand, while both pairs of their shoes lay abandoned on a nearby dune.

“Sand. Exactly what I was thinking.”

John’s face screwed up in those quizzical wrinkles that always made Sherlock’s breath catch.

“People look at the sand and see only one colour—beige. They don’t see. They think it’s boring, when, in fact, quite a combination of colors made possible by the quartz—silicon dioxide, actually. Feldspar. Mica. Sand is white, tan, green, even black or pink.

“Hawaii,” John supplied.

“Hawaii,” Sherlock nodded. If you add in the mineral content of the locale’s rocks and stone from the ocean… Calling it beige is an insult. One must see what’s beneath. A myriad of colour, of hidden possibilities, not simple at all, but nuanced. Deceiving appearance. A marvel.”

He turned his head and stared at his partner. “You are like the sand, John.”

John went still and quiet. He looked stunned, and his eyes were wet.

“What did I—? Did I—? Ah… I insulted you, didn’t I? “I didn’t mean—?”

John’s expression melted into a smile. “Oh, Sherlock,” he sighed. “Come here, you nutter.” John leaned in and tenderly kissed his love. Sherlock reciprocated with enthusiasm and scooted closer.

Their hands entwined in the sand. ----- As part of Fluffburary, I decided to give our boys some time off. I managed to work in all three prompt words, plus I added the word "fluffy" as a bonus. @fluffbruary @7-percent @jbaillier @anyawen @totallysilvergirl