#squints i think i have all of the tags
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speedrunning a bday gift for bb nephew hjdfgjh
#rug hooking#muffled laugh#wip#artists on tumblr#squints#honestly the difficult part is over( aka the cat) so that's good#I say speedrunning but it's in two weeksish#but it's kinda big? hgnng I want it to be an actual rug but since it's not pure wool idk how durable it would be#in the long run#which again I still wanna make a big rug for my room#so I can stomp around on it/test it out haha#being able to use the malabrigo chunky green yarn is very satisfying#also bless you chunky yarn which is making the progress go a lot faster haha#I drew a failed pattern on the other side of the backing and the fingertips on my left hand#look super bruised but it's just the marker rubbing off mhjfg#still like this style the most I think (the blended color type? like with the sea otter haha or the horse one#or like there's a big mix of textures/yarn size#coelacanth is fun but I think I got a little too nitpicky with it#lmao all my breaks between work have either been coral island or rug hooking#sort of related but there was a yarn shop I went to maybe 2 years ago?#and there was a yarn I bought there that I'm finally using up more and it's literally the softest/fluffiest yarn ever :'D#need to dig through my labels to see which brand it was#sorry to all the people who decided to open tags and got slammed with a wall of text/ramblings LMAO#edit: rip the yarn brand's actually been discontinued since 2018 hAHA
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A spot of practice 🐦⬛⚔️🐦⬛
#Lucanis Dellamorte#Rook de Riva#DA Rook#Dragon Age Rook#Rookanis#if you squint kind of sort of 🏃♀️#need to build up that rapport and closeness that shifts over time into Something Else#and upon that shift suddenly all their normal interactions like sparring are Completely Different#and they find themselves thinking of a morning spar or something hours or even days later#thoughts lingering on how their faces were mere centimetres apart#how one grab for a simple throw exposed just a sliver of more skin 🫢🫢🫢#the feeling of arms around one momentarily before crashing to the ground#the memory of the other lingering over them. panting. triumphant. smirking at them.#they must be PLAGUED with thoughts of the other#they must play out like a period drama or I will not have it 🤺#Dragon Age#Dragon Age: The Veilguard#le sketchbook tag#Amri de Riva#le OC tag
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WHY has no one talked about these panels. fuck it its 12 am (at the time of me "finishing" (<- not even close) writing this, its nearly 2 am) im going to talk about them
ahem.
before i get to the Main Point i wanna discuss chils tendency to spiral into his thoughts


like, sure, yeah, he's a reasonable guy. real logical-- but he tends to rush through so many possibilities and in this scene even berates himself for his tiny mistake. every thought in this scene goes so fast to me here, just "snap snap snap, call for help, no thatll attract too much attention- wait is there a switch? crap its too far away- nevermind lets just wait for marcille- but can i trust her with that?? god im so stupid, am i just gonna be trapped here until morning???" and it takes a moment for him to stabilise and snap out of it
like... he even has a little pep talk about it
i guess you could take this as him merely being a quick thinker? but i highly doubt it -- look at this fucking guy.


anyways. hes always got to be eased out of it one way or another, whether that be complainerism (self-explanatory), strategising with another person (that way all the insecure thoughts get pushed to the back in favour of working together), reassuring himself (discussed above) or...

you. could.

distract him.
place a brick wall in front of that zooming train of thought and watch it crash and burn :)
he doesnt even respond in that first pic, by the way. in fact, he doesnt say anything for another 3 (and a bit) pages, and by then the topic has been safely switched (granted those three pages are just marcille and laios making the familiars, but i feel it still stands that there was no response at all, not even visually)
secondly, in that other instance -- see how his eyes go wide as saucers when contact is made? and how they turn into pinpricks once he looks back**? god. and. like.
oh. fuck. ive gottta continue this in a reblog since ive reached the picture limit on mobile -- i am not even a THIRD of a way through all my thoughts on this- we didnt even get to my footnote!! sit tight everyone :)
#yeah i think theyre touchy even if they dont realize it#like poke poke nudge nudge pat pat#(not to mention the fact that theyre often Right Next To Eachother)#um. ill main tag this cause i want people to see it soooo bad (+ im in need of more chilaios warriors...)#dungeon meshi spoilers#dungeon meshi#chilchuck#chilchuck tims#laios#laios touden#<- i apologise#and last but not least the star of the show...#chilaios#heehee#ohh all the normal people are gonna look at this post and squint but as long as i can drag in a FEW people my life will have vastly improve#also hello chilaios nation ! WE NEED TO DISCUSS--
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I meant to make a post about this yesterday, but I’ve thinking about the new news letter and how toby confirmed that the website isn’t “canon” and what this means for noelle’s blog posts.
To me somethings always felt a little off about noelle and susie in “the_n3w3st_g1rl_g1rl” post, susie felt more actively aggressive than usual, with us knowing of no other instances where she started something without being prompted to, and noelle’s inaction and romanticisation of fear are at their worst. it’s of course possible that this what they were like prior to when we see them in game but to me that feels like a contradiction to how the game presents susie as someone who’s never actually done anything to earn her reputation prior to the hallway scene in chapter 1.
it almost feels as if her and noelle’s worst traits have been exaggerated, like we’re looking through a distorted mirror.
like we’re looking through a shadow crystal.
(image from chapter 2. sourced from a reddit post by Liny_An)
#just something i thought was interesting#i’m so excited for all the lore revelations we’re going to get next month#also spamton sweepstakes 2 was cool as hell#i forgot how awesome it is to get excited about deltarune stuff#i love this game so much you have no idea#anyways actual tags now#deltarune#deltarune theory#susie deltarune#noelle holiday#suselle#a little bit#if you squint#text post#shadow crystal#i don’t think that’s a tag but oh well#utdr newsletter#spamton sweepstakes
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further to a topic i saw the other day idk how many times i can see the words dead dove on a blog and then look at the tags and go ? this truly just needs a trigger-warning and doesn't warrant the dead dove tagline.
#like i see the words dead dove on your blog im assuming the worst hello#saw someone use it and was like ? nobody this correctly let me see what all the fuss is about: nah.#this person had used the tag GENUINELY. this was fully admissable like thats the first time ive seen this used properly LMAOOOO#they said hey my blog will contain INC*ST and AGE G*PS and if you follow me youre ok w that. LMAO#i have a zombie oc im not going to dead dove-tag for cannibalism. thats just a trigger warning to be stated in rules#i have a demon oc. i have DEATH as an oc. im not tagging religious themes. thats just a trigger warning.#not my mutuals yall wld never but#FOR THE LOVE OF GOD PLEASE LEARN TO USE THE DEAD DOVE TAG PROPERLY#please stop using dead dove thinking it looks cool or something bcs u are#blurring the fucking lines#like ppl will always check rules n im glad i do but i let out the biggest fucking sigh sometimes bcs im like#squints like im reading an illegible scribble. yeah ok so its just a TRIGGER WARNING?#also while im here dont engage with me if youre into proshipping or engage with people that are <3
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im sorry i personally cant see malleus and silver as siblings at all.....
and i dont really understand why people do either?
to silver, malleus has always been like. the future ruler of his country? a royal figure he has the duty to protect? hes not even on the same social status, something they are both very aware of......
yes of course he has a deep relationship with him after everything that happened in book 7, but it really doesnt feel like a sibling relationship at all? it really feels like. well. the same relationship sebek has towards malleus... and i really never see anyone saying that sebek and malleus are "like siblings". both silver and sebek see malleus with devotion and admiration as his knights
the "they were raised by lilia" argument is also very ?? because malleus was not raised by lilia completely like silver was lol. lilia could barely see malleus as the senate wanted him GONE from the castle, and he could only come back every so often (which is one of the reasons why lilia would just say "its ok malleus dw" when he fucked something up, how is lilia going to blame a kid who he only sees like once a month or whatever and its the reason why malleus was SO lonely on the first place-- if he had been raised by lilia he wouldnt have had this whole flashback about how lonely and alone he always was)
and when malleus went to lilias house to see silver, silver never saw him as a brother or anything like that. it was the big dragon man who was the prince of the country, he never had any kind of familial relationship with him
respect to you if you do see them like siblings, but i personally cant and never saw any indication of them being like that
#twisted wonderland#malleus draconia#silver#still not using the other tag#twst spoilers#if you squint#but i see people complaining about them so. whatever. there.#the “most rational sibling argument” with them beating the shit out of each other meme IS very funny not going to deny it#but i still dont get why everyone goes “wow children of lilia!!!!”#as far as i know lilia did give his lifespan to allow malleus to be born but#1) malleus didnt even know about this until book 7#and 2) lilia was not in malleus childhood that often#if at all#fuck you senate btw#those guys are dicks#so like. why do people still think that lilia raised malleus is beyond me#levan should have been there tho#mf i know you are alive we didnt see you with the other ghosts#plus i hate when in the found family trope people assign nuclear family roles to its members#dont play with me#“thats the sibling thats the aunt thats the dad”#do you know what found family even means..........
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I'll Be Here Until You're Okay
Legend was fine when they landed in Skyloft. It'd been ages since Sky had seen Groose or Sun, and he quite literally cried when he saw them again. Sky deserved to see his partners, deserved to see his Loftwing, his home. It was a blissful few days of rest, before they had to leave due to hearing of a group of black blooded monsters nearby.
Legend was fine when they landed in Outset, even with the memories of the waves, the sand, a girl and a dream. Wind had missed his grandma and sister so much, and he'd screamed as soon as they hit the sand. He ran faster than Legend had ever seen him run. Wind had smiled more than he had in a while too, and Legend got really sunburnt and quite miserable.
Legend was fine when they landed in Four's world. It was good to see Four's Grandpa again, to trade stories and fix some of Wild's broken weapons. Four had been excited to see the Minish again, and get a chance to talk to Dot.
They were fine when they landed in Time's. The ranch was quiet and felt almost like home. Malon was kind as always, and they had good places to sleep. Fighting was easier, almost, with the knowledge they'd have an actual bath and mattresses to sleep on when they were done.
Fine in Wild's. Flora had been ecstatic to see her partner again, and Wild relaxed a good bit around her. Seeing Farosh had been a rare treat, and the hot springs Wild had brought them all to were heavenly.
Fine in Twilight's. Ordon was just as quiet as the ranch had been.
Hyrule's. Good to see Hyrule acting confident for once.
Warriors'. The bars were good.
But they were most decidedly not fine once they landed in Wild's again, after only a couple of months away from it. ***
Legend stepped forward out of the portal, Hyrule right behind them. They blinked in the bright sunlight, expecting to see a familiar landmark, the house they shared with Ravio...
When none of that was seen and instead they were greeted by an open field, Legend froze. Why Wild's Hyrule again? Why? Hylia must really hate them if she won't even let them go home. Legend hated her just as much, she never let them rest, not even after all the adventures. No matter how many times Legend did her bidding, she was never satisfied. Legend clenched a fist, angry. They wanted to go home.
Home.
Oh, Ravio.
Legend's eyes watered. They let their hand unclench, suddenly gripping the side of their skirt instead. It'd been almost five months since Legend had seen Ravio. Legend bit their lip and didn't notice their name had been called until the entire Chain was watching them with worried expressions. Legend took their hands from their skirt and clasped them together instead, with a sort of finality. "Wild. This is yours, right?" Fuck, Legend's voice broke. Legend took a shuddering breath, watching Wild. Wild nodded, expression sad. Legend nodded stiffly right back, before turning around and beginning to walk, shaking. They didn't care where they went, not right now. If the road didn't lead to home then Legend didn't care.
"Legend-?"
Legend ignored Warriors, continuing to walk. The longer their mind dwelled on home, on Ravio, the worse they felt. Legend was quite tired of feeling sad already.
Ravio. Legend missed him so much. The space between his teeth, his scarf. Sheerow. His laugh. The feeling of his hands against Legend's. The gentle curve of the back of his neck against Legend's hand. The stumble when they danced together.
Legend hadn't even received a letter from their husband in what, three, four weeks? Almost a month? (Married for tax purposes, Legend always insists. Lies.) What if Ravio was hurt? Worse, what if Ravio was dead? Fuck. The thought alone... Legend choked, giving a soft whine. They brought a hand over their mouth, trying to stifle it. Tried not to cry, don't cry, don't cry, don't-
A soft hand came down on Legend's shoulder, encouraging them to turn. Legend turned, eyes squeezed shut, biting their lip hard to try and make the pain there worse than the pain in their heart. Legend was gently pulled forwards into someone's chest- Time, only Time had that height -and Time's hand came up behind Legend's head to cradle it close. Ravio had always held them the exact same as Legend was being held by Time right now. It hurt.
"I'm sure the next portal we go through will be yours, Legend." Time said quietly. Legend gave a soft sob- the way they were being held, how much they missed Ravio, the soft tone, it was all too much- and that was all it took for them to lose the tiny bit of control they had over their emotions. Legend shakily put their arms around Time, fisting the back of the man's shirt tightly.
"I miss Ravio." Legend whispered, crying harder as soon as Ravio's name was out of their mouth.
"I know, Legend. You'll see him again soon." Time soothed, hugging Legend for an undetermined amount of time. By the time they were done, the rest had set up camp most of the way and Wild was making lunch. Legend sat down next to the fire, close to no one.
Warriors offered Legend whatever Wild had made for lunch. Legend refused, staring into the fire. An apple was put into their hand.
Legend looked at it, and reluctantly took a bite. It wasn't long before Hyrule was pressed to Legend's left side, trying to comfort. The soft tingle of magic against Legend was soothing, even if only a little. Wind quietly came to rest against Legend's other side, small hands fiddling with a seashell. Legend tiredly watched the fire, tuning everything out.
Ravio, Ravio, Ravio. Every heartbeat pressed Ravio's name into Legend's head. If they closed their eyes they could see their home. The place they put their shoes. Where they packed up their gear. The rocking chair. A table with a cup Legend had carved out of wood, when their hands didn't shake. A blanket that Ravio had crocheted, at the end of their shared bed.
Legend hugged themself, bringing a shaky hand to an earring in their ear. Enchanted with both a minor protection charm and a resistance to lightning. Ravio had given them to Legend for an anniversary. Legend took a shuddering breath. Their anniversary had already passed, and Legend didn't even get to spend it with their husband.
That night, Legend slept away from everyone, and poorly. They were grouchy all the way to the nearest stable, and then some. Warriors didn't jab at them even once the entire trip.
xxx
A week passed in Wild's world. A week and a half.
Two.
Every day, Legend was worse and worse. Everyone was quiet around them, lest they shatter whatever fragile state Legend was in. They cried, and frequently. No further words from Ravio, no reassurance that he was okay.
Three weeks.
Four.
xxx
They spent a month and a half in Wild's world. When the next portal appeared, everyone cheered. No matter how pretty Wild's world was, blood moons were no fun and neither were the guardians. Legend stepped through the portal first, and even chanced a prayer to Hylia. Another one to Lolia for good measure.
Please, let this one be mine. Let me be home.
They landed in an apple orchard. Legend rubbed their eyes and turned around to help Sky through, then Wind. When everyone was through, Legend put a hand on one of the trees, thumbing an engraving on it. L + R.
Link and Ravio. They'd engraved their initials in every one of these trees, after an escapade with a good bottle of wine.
Legend was home.
Legend started stripping themself of their gear, much to the Chain's surprise. They got their boots off, ignoring the questions, and started pulling on the Pegasus Boots. They started cursing up a storm when they had to untie the left one. As soon as they were on enough to stand, Legend clicked their heels and fucking bolted.
It didn't matter that they ran into a tree on the way there. All that mattered was the man in the purple button up, sleeves rolled up and hands in the garden soil. What mattered was the way he hummed and the way his fingers moved and the wedding band on a cloth beside him. Legend wrenched the boots off their feet as soon as Ravio was in their sight, and yelled for him.
"Rav! Ravio, I'm home!" Legend had tears in their eyes, scrambling to get to Ravio.
"Link?" Ravio's head whipped around, and he dropped whatever he had been trying to plant. He'd barely risen to his feet before Legend barreled into him, hugging almost tight enough to bruise.
"Link-? Oh, honey." Ravio whispered, as Legend started crying hard.
"I missed you, I missed you so much, Rav. I love you. I was so worried when you didn't send any letters, I thought you could've been dead and-" Legend whispered, the rest of the words lost against Ravio's skin, holding so tight as if Ravio would disappear like the girl on the island. Legend wouldn't be able to take it if that happened again.
"Breathe, dear. I missed you too, and I love you just as much. If not more. I was equally worried, since I haven't heard word from you in months." Ravio said softly, and even though his hands were covered in dirt, he brought one of them to cradle the back of Legend's head very firmly. Even though Time had held them like this more than a month ago, it hadn't felt the same.
This was home, and it smelled like lavender and apple soap. The other hand landed on Legend's back. They were still swaying lightly together when the rest of the Chain caught up. Sky flopped down onto the grass, wheezing. After a few moments, both Hyrule and Four joined him.
Legend whined very audibly when Ravio tried pulling away, tightening their grip.
"Link, we've got visitors."
"Don't care. Please, stay, please. Just a little bit longer, Rav. It's been so long. I was so scared." Legend's voice was soft, barely heard, whispered against skin.
Ravio sighed, and kissed Legend on the forehead.
"A little bit longer, then." Ravio sniffled, tightening his hold.
Link's wedding band glittered on their right hand, the only ring that Legend had brought themselves to wear for a while. They'd polished and fiddled with it a little obsessively. Sheerow twittered about, pulling at Legend's hair, nipping at his ear tips, his own little way of saying, "Hello, welcome home, missed you."- no matter how irritating. Sheerow was gently told something by Ravio, and after a moment, Ravio's right hand had the same ring resting on the designated finger.
"You're alright, honeybun. I'm here." Soft, whispered against Legend's cheekbone.
"I'm real."
Legend sobbed, squeezing tight.
Ravio was here, and he was very, very real.
fin.
#linked universe#linkeduniverse#it got away from me#angst#legend lu#legend linked universe#all the boys!#I put legend through it jeez#some of it might be sloppy but that's because I'm just getting back into it#raviolink#Ravio x legend#I have poor memory how do you expect me to remember all the tags#hope you enjoy it!#oh wait there's more tags#hurt/comfort#I used they/them for Legend because their gender is just#so confusing#but I wanna snatch it#married for tax purposes! :D#ALICE by PEGGY really fueled this one#the 'dreamers dream until they don't' really fits Legend#threw myself through a loop with this one#ouch#I HAD IT READY SO EARLY#and they were platonic besties who loved each other very much if you squint really really hard#I think the Ravio and Legend dynamic is great#Here you go here's dinner.
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Yes well I'm back in BG3, doing a multiplayer campaign
Procella is a storm sorcerer! She has an attitude that's like, "I'm confidently definitely right about this *casually does the thing*" and then when it goes wrong she's like, "...Hmm OK." She mouths off to every single person she meets. She thinks she's the smartest person in the room but she actually has five (5) braincells, and thinking about Gale is hogging three of them. She gives off the vibe that she's professional and might be dangerous because she's innately good at elemental magic, but people who spend enough time around her soon realize, "Wait...is she actually kind of an idiot?"
Yes. Yes she is.
I love her.
#bg3#baldur’s gate 3#bg3 tav#tav tag: procella#bg3 sorcerer#tiefling oc#sketching and doodling#myfandomincolor draws#I love all my tavs but cella has very swiftly become brainrot#she's got all bel's dumb btch qualities while having the deadpan demeanor of lyra#gale x tav#I couldn't find tattoos that had exactly the look I wanted with lots of spiky geometric elements#but the infernal ones are pretty close if you squint#honestly I was vaguely thinking about DA:O vallaslin patterns
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got asked to draw two of my old wc rp ocs :-) left is cicadahop, right is scallopstar
#my art#wc oc#squints. its been a dogs age since ive posted anything wc oc related#oc#BUT YA!!!! these guys are old. i think i made cicadahop 2018-2019 but i could be wrong/i have no way of checking haha#and scallopstar was made 2020.? i think? both are vaaastly different#if i were to play them today i think id keep a lot of things the same for cicada. shes just a silly girl who wants to make friends and#and be kind. as for scallopstar. i think id change a lot#one reason: ive gotten a lot better (I HOPE) with storytelling now that ive been playing dnd for a well over a year#and since i also run two different campaigns. two: i have more experience writing a character with an arc that turns them into a villain#three: i was really going through it at the time so. erm. LMFAO plus i was like 16 so ANDKJFGNJDFHBGJH#but yeah!!! kinda crazy looking at my old art and seeing how much ive improved#also a weird feeling to draw them again but not a Bad weird feeling. been doing a lot of reminiscing#thank god we can copy/paste tags bc if i had to rewrite this all id be so sad HAHA#the crop was weird so i wanted to fix it before it was too late lol#since these 2 are ocs im not gonna indicate this was a request the same way i will with the other requests lol
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describe a time your muse discovered something about themself.
drabble prompts
( this started being kind of a continuation of some of my disconnected thoughts on yelena's styling & its connection to her self-perception but THEN I started thinking about the gap of time between Hawkeye & Thunderbolts where she’s still working for OXE but is starting to feel #conflicted about it. SO. this got Long and Weird lol sorry [under the cut for spiraling + general black widow activities. not really explicit but there's blood and some other stuff (see tags)] )
What Yelena remembers: The call from Valentina. A description (civilian. Heard something he shouldn't have). A deadline (two weeks). A price (enough). Easy for a Black Widow, Valentina said. Think of it like a vacation.
She wasn’t a Widow. She’d stopped being a Widow.
What Yelena remembers: Following him to the bar. Drinking something, not strong enough. Smiling her way into his passenger seat. Giggling, girlish. It was her voice, maybe, but stretched taut, warped over the wrong sound. Strange and distorted, like it was coming from someone else entirely. She didn't recognize it.
Widows didn't exist anymore. They'd burned the Red Room to the ground.
What Yelena remembers: Stumbling down the hallway with his hands in her hair. She didn't recognize those hands. They didn't belong to her. Pretty red nails so bright against his white button down. She didn't recognize those hands. They didn't belong to her. Ignoring the picture frames. Ignoring the smiles, the summer holidays, the daughter on his shoulders. Locking the door. Pretending, for a moment, that he was someone awful, worse than her. Someone with blood on his hands.
She had freed them, the Widows.
What Yelena remembers: Blood under her red nails. Blood splattered on her wrists. Blood up to her elbows blood on her knees blood in her mouth blood she can’t get it out she can’t get the blood out she can’t get it out there's so much blood those are her hands.
She hadn’t even kept the suit.
What Yelena remembers: Shutting off the sink. Staring at the washed-out pink spiraling down the drain. Staring at the picture above the sink (the woman was pretty, but she had too many eyes, and none of them were blinking. There was something red crusting in her long blonde hair.) Staring until it she blinked. Jumping when the phone rang. Valentina.
She'd burned it. Too many stains.
What Yelena remembers: The safe house was a block away. Her nail polish was chipped.
She's not a Widow.
What Yelena remembers: Stumbling down the hallway. Drinking something stronger. Not strong enough. It's never strong enough. It never makes her forget what she wants to.
(What Yelena doesn't remember: The scissors were dull. She'd found them in a kitchen drawer. She didn't care, she just needed it gone, needed her gone, the woman in the picture with too many eyes and sticky crusted hair and hands all the hands she can't get it out she can't get it out she can't get it out Was it a picture? She doesn't remember. She never remembers.)
What Yelena remembers: Her head, throbbing. Skin stretched too tight over her face. The light bleeding in through the kitchen window. Peeling herself off the linoleum. (She's holding scissors. Why is she holding scissors?) Clumps of hair flaking off her shoulders when she stands. Her reflection, blurry in the burner phone's shitty camera: smeared mascara around bloodshot eyes. Hair a choppy mess, cropped almost to her skull in places.
(She should laugh, or cry. She should feel awful - she does. But something strange untwists beneath her ribs. She runs her hands through what's left of her hair over and over and over. It feels like pressure easing.)
Two weeks later, Valentina calls again. A contract in Malaysia. Easy for a Black Widow.
(Her hair’s grown out a bit. It looks a little better. More intentional, at least.)
Yelena says no. Yelena takes it.
#( MELODRAMATIC GIRL HOURS‼️)#ask to tag#( asks. ) answered#alcohol tw#blood tw#dysphoria tw#<- if you SQUINT#( IMPLIED bw ops program / rr related trauma )#( also implied murder. but u know how it goes over here )#( tldr i think yelena has a Weird relationship with being a slash the b/lack w/idow no matter the verse & struggles to let it go )#( (girl who is totally not projecting) i also think m/cu yel especially has a complex relationship to Gender & the concept of femininity )#( however i am unsure if she would ever register that as Anything (it is). it is something i want to explore more tho. )#( i have Posts on this. if anyone is inch rested. )#( n e ways i hope u all get what i was going for here lol )
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time for eden posting. nope, not that one. not that one either. yes, the other one. the final fantasied one. the one that split his soul into halves and then survived the sundering because he got locked in a box. and then the box got eaten by a space whale. that eden
#.text#by technicality he is the body and not the heart. which is funny bc he was originally just eden (euden eden) in ff14#who is the heart and not the body#ive been trying to think of how he meets the scions for a whiiiiile and i think yda just beats up those voidsent in the twelveswood#and one of them spits out the box eden is locked in. brings it to the waking sands. and accidentally frees him from his self imposed prison#its literally just this small cube. the size of a rubix cube. completely black. probably covered in voidsent guts by now#so the fact she picked it up and kept it at all is extremely funny#i think thancreds the one to open it tho. the bias is showing. but yda would be like looook at this super cool box i found#inside a voidsents belly!!! and he'd be like woah thats awesome lemme see. & accidentally presses a button#and then Boom. there is a body in their meeting room. dressed like an ascian#eden: which one of you fools let me out of my prison#yshtola: thancred summoned the ascian so perhaps he should deal with it. if he dies then not much is lost really#eden has been asleep for like tens of thousands of years he doesnf even know what an ascian is#hes standing there like 🧍 guys is the world still blowing up#he probably cant even read modern text. i imagine hes squinting at everything thats handed to him like an elderly man#which he is technically#yda: hmmm... he cant read common eorzean... he lies about his age... hes bad at physical exercise... hes super smart... speaks in riddles..#yda: eden have you considered joining the senior citizens club in uldah. they do book clubs every thursday and dances every saturday!#i didnt actually know who he would bond with the easiest but yeah its probably yda. maybe yshtola or urianger as well#i dont think hed get along with the twins well but mostly because they remind him of something hes forgotten (himself)#and it makes him uncomfortable. and sad. and angry.#cons of forcefully tearing yourself into parts to forget and to destroy the worser parts of you#alisaie would hate him anyway solely bc he keeps trying to get himself killed#which would piss her off soooo bad#thancred too probably tbh#those 2 are a pair even if they arent in canon. Just trust me on that one#augh i need an eden tag idk#i had a name for him but i dont remember it anymore#it was like albenau or something#i cant remember tho
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What if I was insane again about the first thing Alpha Grim Sonic hearing when Nine creates him is his purpose—that he is Nine's friend?
Friendship as a concept in Prime is handled interestingly among its main characters. As Sonic (who thinks he knows a lot about friendship) comes to deepen his understanding of what it means to have a home/be home, I think it's safe to say his definition of friendship develops along with it. Compare this to Nine, who's learned everything he knows about "friendship" and personal relationships in general through his relationship with Sonic (at least, after his childhood of bullying).
So of course I think about Nine, who never wants to be hurt again, yet can no longer bear feeling alone (not after feeling that sense of companionship and belonging with someone else), which results in him creating a warped version of friendship for himself (one where he is surrounded by people, but people who only do whatever he wants, who have no opinions and thoughts of their own, who can't backstab him). And so I think about Alpha Grim Sonic, who is the very first robot Nine creates under this idea of frienship and companionship.
Nine is his master, and Alpha Grim Sonic is his protector, his bodyguard, his weapon
But he's also his friend.
Alpha Grim Sonic doesn’t talk back (can't even if he wanted to), but his purpose has always been clear to him: be Nine's friend. That's what he was created to be.
So I imagine Alpha Grim Sonic performing his purpose to the T at first under Nine's framework. He's Nine's friend, so he does whatever Nine commands, he never talks back or challenges authority, he protects Nine at all cost. And then, perhaps unbeknownst to Nine, he begins to shift ever so gradually. Sure, he's never insubordinate, he never offers up opinions, he still can't speak, but the lines of devotion begin to blur.
Is it in his code? Is out of a real sense of feeling?
Alpha Grim Sonic does not understand friendship, no matter whether it believes it does or not. But it's ironic to me if, despite being created under Nine's warped idea of it, the robot slowly grows their own soul, witnesses other displays of frienship and care, and drifts outside the bounds of that idea (a carefully crafted painting begins to leak out of its frame, expanding the masterpiece). They protect Nine, they do only what he commands, and yet they hate to see Nine in pain, they wish to bring Nine comfort (and so it feels good to him when Nine commands him to do such things that might bring his master comfort).
Does this make any sense? To believe that friendship means to hold one person on a pedestal, to protect them, to only listen to them, to never talk back, to never have opinions, and yet, despite believing what your creator tells you of friendship with them (your very purpose in this existence), to slowly fall further into those feelings that true care and love for another person brings, to wish to comfort someone the way one might describe a true friend would, despite not realizing any of this.
#sonic prime#alpha grim sonic#miles nine prower#nine the fox#crystalbond#crystalbondshipping#sonic the hedgehog#sonine if you squint#i just be ramblin#Why did I tag the ship tag?#Well if you've seen my earlier posts this introspection and journey of Alpha Grim Sonic's naturally leads him to struggle with what it mean#to feel emotion and be alive and to care for other people#Beyond grappling with whether any of this is even possible#they don't understand what it means to have friends or to love aside from what has been told to them#I don't think Alpha Grim will ever fully sus out the exact nature of his feelings for Nine‚ which would naturally grow over time in my eyes#But whether friendship or romance or in between or something else or all of it#The love Alpha Grim has is meant to become real#On the surface it's hard to see that he's changed#partially because he can't speak but partially because of people's preconceived notions of what robots are capable of#but below the surface‚ that original concept of devotion to one's master ingrained into their code and that idea of friendship etched into#its memory banks#these have grown outside the bounds of strict parameters#the robot is learning and yet growing naturally#And so devotion is both code and out of a genuine care for his very first friend‚ his master#he wants Nine to be happy because he feels this deep inside (the idea of Nine being happy makes them feel good)#He still would never dream of going against Nine's wishes#Nine created a robot to serve him#And the robot grows not only to serve‚ but to love#He takes his original purpose—being Nine's friend—to his logical conclusion despite being created under a warped idea of frienship#au ramblings
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reposting this from my twt bc its funny but olike. im still thinking about this. sigma with glasses could be real methinks... mostly because it would be really funny but also I Love giving characters stuff like that actually
#also. i made a typo in the original tweet but yes. i have glasses and so do BOTH my parents and sister. and like all of my grandparents#i was the first one to need them then my mom found out she needed them because of me. and so on#but enough about me. the prospect of sigma having glasses is so funny. phi should bully him for it. but it would be kind of cool also#even if his vision WAS shit in vlr which it likely could be over 45~ years it would make sense if him as zero sr put a contact in his intac#eye to prevent his younger self from Knowing too early. but also LOL#diana would rock them too i think. like it would be silly. but#MAN sigma having glasses is just. so funny to me#not what the post is about but i do also think it's funny that phi has glasses in ztd but not vlr. What happened. could she just not see#girl who has to squint really hard at the AB game results to read who allied and betrayed LMAOO#anywyas. i will stop rambling. but if anyone does end up drawing sigma in glasses or has any further commentary. i would Like to hear/see..#see. get it. like eyes. bc glasses. OKAY thats enough#zero escape#virtue's last reward#zero time dilemma#vlr#ztd#sigma klim#zero escape spoilers#vlr spoilers#ztd spoilers#just. tagging all of those just in case#trevor.txt
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This is what the fungus does to a man
#identity v#idv#idv composer#frederick kreiburg#Coa vii#how do you coa tags#Idv fungus#idk chat#frederick kreiburg has a bad hair day#Frederick kreiburg gives into the voices#frederick kreiburg’s canon coa appearance#I made one of his eyebrows too thick#I just started spiraling from there tbh#I couldn’t fix it so I just started scribbling all of his features together#The eyes were cooked from the start but#The dark circles helped I think?#Idk I just sat down and angrily whispered#“i hate you so much I hope you die”#As I attacked him with a pen repeatedly#And forgor about my reference pics#If you squint you can see the vague outline of his clothes#I have a heache#Idc if his features are uneven#I’m drawing on my bed with a cheap pen at midnight with my phone battery at 3% fighting to keep my references up#You are not here for quality art#Oh fanart tags#Idv fanart#??#girl idk I’m gonna end it all#Hope he explodes tonight
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Random musings about A'vi that may or may not make sense...
I promised I would write down a bit of my thoughts on A'viloh's feelings and probably specifically about Haurchefants since that is a little vague in my writing.
But before we speak of Haurchefant me have to speak of A‘vi and we have to consider that his own mind is his own worst enemy sometimes. If there is a very unreasonable way to feel bad about a situation he can and will find that way!
In a way we also would have have to speak about his upbringing and about Laqa of course and weirdly enough also about Thancred, although most of the last is pretty much just some idea in A'vi's head.
Not only is A'vi still confused because of what Thancred did before they parted ways -even if he tries to ignore that- but of course he also still loves Laqa.
Laqa was always there als long as he remembers. A friend, a lover, but most important maybe a person he could rely on, someone who protected him. And also to be honest a person he could hide behind, a person that would make the difficult decisions so he wouldn’t need to.
A’vi wouldn’t ever admit it and it’s probably not even conscious but some part of him - the part that refuses to change, that fantasises of going back to how things used to be - has been trying to replace all of that ever since Laqa is gone.
In a way Rael fulfills these criteria too. Rael would fight for him, care for him, protect him, just like Laqa did. This is a big part of why A'vi is so focused on Rael, occassionally so much that it gets mistaken for being something romantic. But in contrast to Laqa, Rael would in the end not coddle him. They wouldn’t spare him the struggle, the heavy lifting, the difficult decision making. And of course ultimately Rael also isn't availabe or fitting as a love interest for A'vi. And while their friendship means the world to A'vi, I think in the end he still needs something more than that maybe...
So back to Thancred for a second, because i think A'vi is not in love with Thancred.
If he is in love with anything or anyone apart from Laqa at this point, then it’s with the idea of not feeling so damn lost and lonely anymore.
In a way maybe that means he could be in love with Thancred but he’s not really in love with the person and more with the idea what he could be for him.
He is entranced by his charming behaviour, of course. People being nice to him is one thing. Kindness alone is too foreign for him still. Apart from Laqa there weren’t many people who were nice to him, especially not in the same way Thancred or Haurchefant are.
But Thancred or Haurchefants flirting with him? He is helpless about that! And it keeps on happening and when it doesn’t he misses the attention maybe? Yes, maybe he has a little crush on either or both of them.
But also, there was this moment after Ifrit when Thancred made him feel understood. A’vi saw Thancred struggling. A similar fight. Feeling not good enough. Trying your best and still failing. Wanting nothing more than to be useful for someone. Trying to live up to some shadow that isn’t there anymore.
And later that feeling of not having control over your own life. The pain caused because of oneself. The guilt he can either live with or decide to die of. Preferably in some grand sacrifice. For a good cause. Maybe that’s all he would ever be good for.
Their coping mechanism couldn’t be more different of course but something about their struggles is so similar. Being not alone in their misery is such a tempting thing. As so is maybe, just maybe, being able to finally move forward. But the important thing in context to HW here is that after the whole Ifrit-thing, when A‘vi considered going on a date with Thancred, this idea was born out of his hope, and only that, to maybe be able to move on from that loss he experienced. And all the fawning about him later, when it was already very clear to him that Thancred wasn’t interested at all, was more A’vi making heart eyes at the idea of being able to be in love with someone else. The idea of being free - just like Thancred - seems so nice to him. Free to do what he wants, to love who he wants and all of that without being scared or feeling horrible about it. Because feeling horrible and guilty and selfish and treacherous simply for still being alive is buried so deep inside of him even though all he wants is to be happy.
To be honest, even if things had been different in either of these two cases (the „date“ and Thancred‘s „disinterest“), I am very sure A‘vi would have found a way to chicken out of it last second. It was never a real possibility, just an impossible thing, so it felt okay for him to dream about it.
With Haurchefant however this IS a real possibility! He is very clearly interested and seems honest enough about it. But while there’s this voice in Avi’s head that says “I want this”, there’s still this other one that says “I can’t! I don’t deserve this! I am a horrible person!“ He rejects Haurchefant because there is someone else on his mind and in his confusion he can’t even tell anymore if this is just one person or two.
So he doesn’t take this risk, all while he thinks he might honestly like Haurchefant. He is just not sure if this is in a friends-only way or if it could develop to be more.
You may say now that this spares him some pain when Haurchefant inevitably meets his fate in the end but exactly the contrary would be the case somehow. Not only does he feel unworthy and ungrateful that someone as kind as Haurchefant died for him because he loved him despite A‘viloh not being able to return these feelings. No he feels like he missed yet another chance! He realises that maybe there will always be hurt and it’s just a matter of how well you spent the time you have. He feels like his insecurities, his awkwardness, his doubt and fear of getting hurt always kept him from making the best out of what he is given, may it be with Laqa or anybody else - time not used as well as he could have.
#Aviloh Tia#just some of my thoughts...#not going to tag this excessively now because its pretty specific and the people who will be interested in reading this are veeeery little#this is tbh just an attempt to bring a dozen notes into one text and it may still contradict itself or things I have already written#and of course there are still ideas floating around in my head about some things that may still influence my plans#the additive way I write my lore really isnt helpful sometimes#I wrote the whole backstory not thinking too much of it and well now its more important to me than I thought#then at some point I thought WoLcred could be a nice ship thingie because not thaaaat many people seem to like that...#and I want a nice ship too just because you know#and lets be honest that still looks kinda nice to me#but guess I am an idiot and I write my chars like idiots XD#and msq is being a bitch on top of that#anyway! conclusion:#I didnt really want to make the A'vi/Haurchefant stuff a canon thing because he really doesnt need another dead boyfriend#the thancred thing is still on the table but right now I'm still squinting at it wondering if I could make that work XD#and if anyone would be interested in that at all too...#ffxiv writing
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Chapters: 4/7 Fandom: Danny Phantom Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Danny Fenton & Jazz Fenton, Danny Fenton & Maddie Fenton, Danny Fenton & Jack Fenton, Danny Fenton & Sam Manson, Danny Fenton & Tucker Foley Characters: Danny Fenton, Jazz Fenton, Jack Fenton (Danny Phantom), Maddie Fenton, Sam Manson, Tucker Foley, Freakshow (Danny Phantom) Additional Tags: No One Knows AU, Invisobang (Danny Phantom), Invisobang 2024 (Danny Phantom), Wings, Ghost King Danny Fenton, Identity Reveal, Mind Control, Good Parents Jack and Maddie Fenton, Episode: s01e20 Control Freaks (Danny Phantom), Canon Rewrite Summary:
Danny has enough on his plate as it is, between his kingly duties, the ghosts that have dropped off the map so suddenly that he's starting to worry, and that dang itch - which was beginning to turn into pain - that just won't go away. He doesn't need to deal with this creepy circus and its equally creepy ringmaster. But when he encounters four strange ghosts robbing a jewelry store, and he starts losing time… He realizes that he can't avoid Circus Gothica forever.
If only he could say not my circus, not my monkeys and just be done with it.
Chapter four is up!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/58614682/chapters/149567134
#invisobang#i think ive decided im not gonna tag all of the character all of the time#and if i tag the characters that show up in the individual chapters itll spoil it#anyway#almost forgot to post this chapter because i got distracted by nick burkhardt having a crisis over seeing people turn into monsters#is that how you spell his last name btw *squints*#oh well#im rewatching grimm because i was talking about it with a friend yesterday#i love that show#fam and i watched it a while back#its been a while tho so i didnt remember much#its starting to come back tho as im watching it#even though im only on the first episode#lets hope i dont forget about it like i do with every other show i watch lol#reminds me i need to keep watching daredevil...#and tmnt 2012...#and ultimate spider-man...#and teen titans...#and the million other shows on my list#i have. a lot#rip
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