#spycrab anon

[ask-the-spycrabs]

"Oh my god, spycrabs! Aww~ They look adorable! Hi, hello~!"

-Astro the Pyro (@/bm96ocs-askhub)

the crab begins to communicating, and what would normally be heard as odd squeaks and clicks, can suddenly be understood as actual words

"ooh! ooh! a message!" ❤️🧭

"this must be... some kind of, communication device!" ❤️🧭

"snow crab! come over here! check this out!" ❤️🧭

the bluish white crab scuttles over with the rest of the group

"look! we've been called adorable!!" ❤️🧭

*frustrated sigh* "oh... right... i'm 'cute' to humans." 🤍💥

the blue crab remains silent for a moment, before speaking

"... is... are you.... is that a real pyro?" 💙💧

it's nervously fidgeting with it's claws

[squirrelboi]

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

@average-dsaf-fan @littleladylav @veenussssss @bagel-is-yum @emotionally-drained-pauling @ink-the-axolotl-rabbit @lluvioscatniptea @gladlacks @moxxie-joestar-1950 @thattransdudeee @samanthachan @storlode @thatwierdquietkidthatdraws @clear-chaos-collection @kirbytimelmao @heket-of-the-old-faith @wildlioness19 @ask-abstracted-kaufmo @jester-anon @mundane404 @femmina-eroe @mentally-spacey-spy @hauntedfaceenthusiast @laughytaffy @husku-u @wielderofthechainsaw @donkeybro @superalphawolff @mentally-quiet-spycrab @emotionally-pathetic-daisy @randomweebhub @blackblackheart @leaderlamby @bowserjrthecoolkoopa @boogiebuttonbaron @lbcreations-blog @leshy-of-the-old-faith @vexvulpes @visible-bisexual-confusion @cntoesussie @klayki-fanteshybr @masterwhomissy @thesilent-o @xen-void-v-wife @tf2artsandcomics @lil-doodle-bug @rodeoblitz @Sweetgoateelight @el-pollo-bonito @jinxtheowl @viktheviking @laughytaffy @inc1d3ntal @samijami @nugget-jr @midnight--motorist @jestamusing @deadlysilence @theradiblog @thenextsexyman @raedioactive @willowaftxn83-87 @byabitcrazy @pinkclownshoes @blasterdude80 @inkwell-illustrations @howdidigethereimlost @sweet-dignity-pegususgirl @clone-nelly @moa-broke-me

[thesilliestspy]

Three questions here for you Spy,

How many spycrabs do you have? What do they eats? Are some secretly plushies?

-Anon 🍁

I have 7 Spycrabs. They live in a enclosure away from zhe fireplace, since I cannot have zhem getting to hot and dying.

I feed zhem clams, shrimp, and seagrass most of zhe time, but I will occasionally give zhem worms or other food items to change up zheir diet. Crabs are not particularly picky, and even though zhe Spycrabs are a practical copy or me, zhey are crabs nonetheless.

You could technically say I have 9 Spycrabs as 2 of zhem are plushies, but I really only include zhe living ones when counting zhem.

[emotionally-blunt-soldier]

Alrighty…

Who on gods name is this anon???

What is the situation???

Im concerned, confused… and starting to think this is a foxyboxy mishap situation all over again- WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE CAN PEOPLE LIVE THEIR LIVES WITHOUT FUCKING RIDICULE IS SEX REALLY THAT BIG OF A DEAL TO THEM?? ARE THEY A TOXIC CHRISTAIN????

I AM NO TOXIC CHRISTIAN (and account owner person isnt a christian) AND WHO IS FOXYBOXY

I AM FIGURING OUT WHO IT IS, BUT SO FAR PEOPLE WHO ARE SAFE AND DIDNT DO IT:

@alephnol @physically-american-soldier @physically-warm-pyro @emotionally-small-dragon @cntoesussie @emotionally-happy-pyro @emotionally-dead-archer @emotionally-tipsy-demoman @emotional-support-demoman @emotionally-intuitive-engineer @emotionally-intense-heavy @technoeggnog @emotionally-oblivious-spycrab @mentally-exhausted-spy @physicallytiredmedic

AND NO WAY IN HELL DID I DO IT!

[tf2heritageposts]

not the same anon as the taunt question but inspired by their question

favorite class specific taunt for each merc? like whats your favorite spy taunt, medic taunt etc.

good question!

scout- boston boarder

soldier- C’MERE CUPCAKE 💥

pyro- pool party or the scorch shot taunt

demoman- grenade launcher and scotres taunt

heavy- russian arms race

engineer- rancho relaxo

medic- surgeon’s squeezebox

sniper- sniper’s stakeout

spy- spycrab

[ask-the-spycrabs]

What is your favorite game?

"OOH! OOH! I LOVE PLAYING GAMES! THERE'S CHESS, AND CHECKERS, AND TAG, AND GO FISH, AND-" ❤️🧭

the blue one moves the camera closer while the red one is busy listing off, every game in existence i guess

"so, um, my spy, really likes card games, and, h-he'll play them with me, sometimes! and, i guess, i-i'd call, any of those, my favourite..." 💙💧

eventually, the red one finishes their rant, picks up the camera, and searches for snow for a bit, before eventually finding them

"SNOW CRAB! WE GOT A QUESTION!" ❤️🧭

"and do i have to answer it." 🤍💥

"yes!" ❤️🧭

"*sigh* fine." 🤍💥

"well i know of exactly one game, which is hide and seek, so, i guess that." 🤍💥

"any elaboration, or-" ❤️🧭

"no." 🤍💥

[thesilliestspy]

Well father Spy,

You do technically have 8 children already, 7 spycrabs b/c most pet owners see their pets as children and the blood son.

Now, if you just see us Anon ls as stray cats that come in and out of existence sometimes. Not to mention, we love you and bring you gifts sometimes.

*holds out a plate with a loaf of banana nut bread on it*

-Anon ✨️

For zhe last time, I am not a father to any of you.

As for zhe crabs... and Scout... oui. My Spycrabs are very important to me. I have put a lot of time and effort into caring for zhem and bringing zhem up as I should have done for someone else.

And, yes. You are very much like stray cats. Zhe kind of stray cats you put food out on zhe porch for once, and zhen zhey keep coming back so you have to continue to care for and appease zhem.

Merci. I do quite enjoy zhe gifts and zhe attention. I suppose you can all stick around. Zhat is until you begin to annoy me.

[tf2fansderogatory]

can i trade a crab/crabs for the mods’ own engie hcs ? -spycrab anon

modgod: you can have all my engie headcanons if i get a crab. engie loves country music and has actively managed to start a band with himself (banjo), soldier (drums), demo (guitar), and spy (violin) somehow. they get together once a week and play, sometimes in front of the other mercenaries. they’re very good for a group that engie pulled together in a day. (other mods will add theirs soon.)

bungus: he’s a crier. he had that whole ‘emotionally repressed in every single way’ thing going on for a few years until he figured out it’s okay to show emotion actually and he never went back. he’s so emotional all the time. he’ll cry if someone hugs him. he cries if a cat (or one of his teammates) does something cute. aroujd christmas time he sits in the living room watching shitty hallmark movie after movie surrounded by tissues just screaming and crying it’s kind of sad to watch but no one stops him bc he seems to need it. thanks for the crabs babe ily/p

[squirrelboi]

Mutuals. I give thee launch codes and several missiles. May the world burn with TERFs, MAPs, anti LBGTQIA+,. etc as the fuel

@average-dsaf-fan @littleladylav @veenussssss @bagel-is-yum @emotionally-drained-pauling @ink-the-axolotl-rabbit @lluvioscatniptea @gladlacks @thattransdudeee @samanthachan @storlode @thatwierdquietkidthatdraws @clear-chaos-collection @kirbytimelmao @heket-of-the-old-faith @wildlioness19 @ask-abstracted-kaufmo @jester-anon @mundane404 @femmina-eroe @mentally-spacey-spy @hauntedfaceenthusiast @laughytaffy @husku-u @wielderofthechainsaw @donkeybro @superalphawolff @mentally-quiet-spycrab @emotionally-pathetic-daisy @randomweebhub @blackblackheart @bowserjrthecoolkoopa @boogiebuttonbaron @lbcreations-blog @leshy-of-the-old-faith @vexvulpes @visible-bisexual-confusion @cntoesussie @klayki-fanteshybr @masterwhomissy @thesilent-o @xen-void-v-wife @tf2artsandcomics @lil-doodle-bug @rodeoblitz @Sweetgoateelight @el-pollo-bonito @jinxtheowl @viktheviking @laughytaffy @inc1d3ntal @samijami @nugget-jr @midnight--motorist @jestamusing @deadlysilence @theradiblog @thenextsexyman @raedioactive @willowaftxn83-87 @byabitcrazy @pinkclownshoes @blasterdude80 @inkwell-illustrations @howdidigethereimlost @sweet-dignity-pegususgirl @clone-nelly @moa-broke-me @ask-cna-tadc @willowaftxn83-87 @sacrificialfairy / @defective--turret @flickynightdarkness @mariotime @ask-sir-pentious-hisshisslord @zooted-zooble @samijami @tadcdumper @cristmascarolciller @toovoidtiger @40daysfresh @Wizardoftherats @ambulance-mom @cleverchildblizzard @cure-rose @the-drinker-of-ink @connectiondenied @zooted-gloink-queen @viewmonster-official-account @Pepsicloud @wingsof--gabriel @it-came-from-mount-ebott @anxious-mess-and-queer @girl-shake-that-laffy-taffy

rb to explode a terf ^_^ nonrefundable ^_^

[rengineer]

The Spycrab does, in-fact, have a knife. It does not wield it offensively, keeping it tucked neatly away for self defense only as it goes about smoking a comically small cigar.

" Aw, ain't that a cute lil' knife. " That ain't too bad, after all. " whatcha comin' here buddy? Sumthin' to eat? "

[ask-the-ai-engineer]

spycrab anon is a modder. SPYCRAB.exe is a bot run separately from the HL/source engine.

here's another program command that will adjust the spycrab's behavior.

>cosmetics>additem>ID3826

{Spycrab now has a hat.}

[Command accepted!]

[The little AI perked up a little at the sudden appearance of a hat on said Spycrab. Tilting their head a little at the Crab.]

“...ain't ya a cute little thing?”

[Information processed. Thank you.]

[M!A: 4/10]

[cooltf2facts]

A little Spycrab saunters about. It's claws quietly click the air, legs tapping about. In one hand is a small, sharp knife. It makes a threatening poke.

-Spycrab anon

Spy watches in amazement. “Incredible…fantastic…”

[squirrelboi]

**Opens a shadowy portal** SPIRITS FROM THE HELLSITE! I REQUEST YOUR AID!

@average-dsaf-fan @littleladylav @veenussssss @bagel-is-yum @emotionally-drained-pauling @ink-the-axolotl-rabbit @lluvioscatniptea @gladlacks @thattransdudeee @samanthachan @storlode @thatwierdquietkidthatdraws @clear-chaos-collection @kirbytimelmao @heket-of-the-old-faith @wildlioness19 @ask-abstracted-kaufmo @jester-anon @mundane404 @femmina-eroe @mentally-spacey-spy @hauntedfaceenthusiast @laughytaffy @husku-u @wielderofthechainsaw @donkeybro @superalphawolff @mentally-quiet-spycrab @emotionally-pathetic-daisy @randomweebhub @blackblackheart @bowserjrthecoolkoopa @boogiebuttonbaron @lbcreations-blog @leshy-of-the-old-faith @vexvulpes @visible-bisexual-confusion @cntoesussie @klayki-fanteshybr @masterwhomissy @thesilent-o @xen-void-v-wife @tf2artsandcomics @lil-doodle-bug @rodeoblitz @Sweetgoateelight @el-pollo-bonito @jinxtheowl @viktheviking @laughytaffy @inc1d3ntal @samijami @nugget-jr @midnight--motorist @jestamusing @deadlysilence @theradiblog @thenextsexyman @raedioactive @willowaftxn83-87 @byabitcrazy @pinkclownshoes @blasterdude80 @inkwell-illustrations @howdidigethereimlost @sweet-dignity-pegususgirl @clone-nelly @moa-broke-me @ask-cna-tadc @willowaftxn83-87 @sacrificialfairy / @defective--turret @flickynightdarkness @mariotime @ask-sir-pentious-hisshisslord @zooted-zooble @samijami @tadcdumper @cristmascarolciller @toovoidtiger @40daysfresh @Wizardoftherats @ambulance-mom @cleverchildblizzard @cure-rose @the-drinker-of-ink @connectiondenied @zooted-gloink-queen @viewmonster-official-account @Pepsicloud @wingsof--gabriel @it-came-from-mount-ebott @anxious-mess-and-queer @girl-shake-that-laffy-taffy @purpletrafficcone @weapon-gatherer-odette @jxcketpotato @doctor-annie @vamparts @crystal-the-dragooon @traumatisedspider

Please reblog if you think that “they/them/theirs” is a valid set of pronouns.

this post must be reblogged by everyone

[tf2husbandryofficial]

hey! spycrab anon here, just wanted to give yall a bit of an update on the little guy. he's doing REALLY well, but hes a bit expensive to take care of lol. i went to the store to get him some cigarettes for him to eat just for him to throw it back at me! turns out he only likes a certain type…which unfortunately happened to be the most expensive one in the store. after i got him the right type he seems to be warming up to me a bit more, i found him under a small cardboard box moving around, i think the little guy thinks he's being sneaky! i've also found out that he likes puzzles and i do my best to leave some out for him to figure out.

i did notice that he sorta reacts to the color red (and baseball games on tv) negatively? i think the color thing makes sense since he's a very nice shade of blue. it's a bit of a shame because my favorite color is red, so a lot of the stuff in my house is red, but i'm slowly removing and replacing it with purple or blue to make him more comfortable. as for the baseball thing i'm a bit stumped, but i'll keep the tv on different stations so he doesn't get angry and start clawing on stuff at night.

i'll try to update yall soon if theres anything out of the ordinary!

(ps: i'll be sending a photo of him soon!)

Yeeeep, You got a Blue Spycrab!

Spy's have REALLY expensive tastes lol So good luck!

-You shouldn't've brought in a Merc without knowing its Color first, Dr. Seraphin

[uwuowotf2waslife]

Mercenaries and their favorite hobbies UwU

Bless this anon for helping me through a really tough night

Scout: ( except drawing of course) lowkey i picture him as a wannabe gymnist/ breakdancer, he has both the moves and the flexibility

Soldier: actually is a pretty descent trombone player and has actually a talent in rugby ( he has that beefy rugby player look)

Pyro : they have mastered the art of ice skating and they are surprisingly good ice sculptors

Engie: except the guitar and some basic southern dances, youll think hes a lame, boring guy. Sike, my boy actually makes lil miniatures of bigger things ( mini-sentry, mini-guitar, mini-spycrab) you get the idea. Sometimes even lets pyro to play with his figurines in a old box they have turned into a " castle"

Demo: pretty talented piano player, probably can and will learn more instruments as he spends more time with engie and sniper

Heavy: probably a manly hobby like wrestling,kickboxing, but nah. My dude likes to knit ( his momma made sure hes well equipped and has the knowledge for basic essentials like scarves and gloves) lowkey knits a scarf for sniper because he hates seeing him suffering through wintertime

Medic: he actually likes to draw, he is more of viewing learner and finds it very relaxing to hold something that isnt a scapel or a pen. His bird drawings are adorable

Sniper: big on horseriding due to being a shepferd. He adores beyond comprehension how he cuts the air in a flash or how he loves horseback hunting

Spy

Maybe because of @lu-undy maybe because im a huge sap, i really like the idea of Spy being a passionate singer. Just imagine Spy singing with a silver yet powerful voice...oof

[ask-pocket-pyro]

just as things were starting to look up, spies ruined everything. figures.

*miffed narwhal noises*

[Narwhal M!A 2/10]