#specifically Putting Niki In The Horrors

[theladyfae]

i think human nature/family of blood is a really good two parter in how it manages to show how full of shit ten is 🫶

[erstwhilesparrow]

sparrow's june-nov 2024 (subset of) mcyt fic rec list

i'm in the mood to make a fic recs list. let's have a fic recs list. this is pulled entirely from my bookmarks covering the last six months, and features empires, life series, hermitcraft, and dsmp. not in that order. i've done my best not to repeat authors within the list, and also i've done my best not to repeat works that have appeared in my other fic rec lists, but you should absolutely check out the other works of anyone who catches your eye!!

(as always, if you are on this list and you do not want to be, please let me know and i will remove you!)

DSMP

tune; small_lizard - Quackity/Sapnap/Karl, 3.8k oneshot. Quackity and bodies and trauma. A series of glimpses into Quackity's life with his fiances. Deeply, wonderfully heartbreaking. Trying to navigate life with other people, without ever really having the words to address how or why the navigation does or doesn't work. Hurts without ever needing to explain to you directly the hurt, and this too is about trauma. Very impressively done!

you may encounter the body; cryptofhoney (braveyoungcowboys) - L'Manberg prose poem, 1.1k words. A meditation on graves and ghosts and places and bodies, as conducted by L'Manberg. The first time I read this I could think of nothing to say except the lines of the fic itself again, because they are so lovely and so wonderfully-constructed. Will make you so so sad about histories and locations and graves. Also, cryptofhoney has a ton of really banger DSMP art/fic/poetry; highly recommend looking around!

Breccia; WheelCoveredInEyes - Quackity-centric, 2.5k oneshot. Foolish and Quackity train the slime army. Making a brand new kind of guy, ft. easter eggs from a wide range of excellent writers' words. A thing I love about WheelCoveredInEyes's work is the sense of... clear-eyed hope and care like a layer of bedrock. It is fundamental and inescapable and lovely and tender and deeply attentive to the particulars of a character's situation at the same time. I did not cover Homestuck or QSMP in this rec list, as those are not fandoms I am in, but holy shit can I vouch for WheelCoveredInEyes's other DSMP fic, Homestuck fic, and QSMP fic for these vibes. Brilliant stuff.

toxic clear down to the bedrock; mouseunderthemountain - Niki-centric, 2.1k oneshot. L'Manberg is in Niki's leg. She does what she can to manage, as everyone and everything drifts apart. This one's just truly so beautiful. The blurring of body and location and self, but also the specificity of what it's like to live in and with this place, after everything that's happened, what it's like to be in Niki's body. I described this fic once as feeling like it refuses to reveal all of itself to me at once; it's just going to tell me things that are true, and it's gonna hurt.

Empires SMP

Gem Dreams of Wizardry; changeableLandscape - E1 Gem character study, 8.9k oneshot. Covers the early days of Gem's Empires S1 POV. Honestly, I thought about making a rec list way back in like June specifically so I'd be able to put this one on it; it's so well-written and so fascinating. The insight into Gem's character (the insight into everyone's characters, actually), the attention to the details that are so easy to forget as later canon events loom larger in our minds, the space given to work and effort and wonder and travel. It makes me grateful to be in this fandom where we can go over the same events over and over and change what we pluck out as important every time.

the last and final translation of love; Ten_Of_Swords - E1 Sausage-centric post-canon, 1.1k oneshot, E-rated for gore. Sausage turns to necromancy to get Pearl back. Awful interactions with bodies and grief follow. The tangle of emotion presented so neatly in every sentence of this is stunning. The juxtaposition of unspeakable care and equally unspeakable, gory horror. The bone-deep ache of loss. The absurdity of still being alive. It's all there, and captured so cleanly. Ten_Of_Swords is a wonderful writer in full generality -- you should check out its other Empires and Life Series works as well!

and, for a beat, we think he's running; maikuria - E1 Sausage-centric roleswap, 4.2k oneshot. After that business with the demon, the Vigil decides it wants Sausage instead of Pix. Gorgeous stuff being done with work skins in this one, and on top of beautiful, thematically-coherent formatting, perfect characterization. The kind of characterization that picks out not just the essence of a character but all the ways they are strange and human and interconnected and a little funny. It feels like maikuria knows these guys, y'know? In the way only an author can know characters they've written and loved for a long time. (maikuria has a lot of excellent Empires S1 fic in general and I encourage people to look at all of it!!)

trying to kill the moon; hoorayy - E2 Pix/Oli roadtrip horror AU, 9.4k oneshot. Pix has a car and is on his way to nowhere in particular. Oli joins him. Things try to catch up with them. Hi, what's up, it's time to talk about the best Pix/Oli fic of all time. It's so good it made me forget I've ever written Pix/Oli; surely this is the only version of their relationship I could ever know about? It captures late summer golden light in a way I thought only cameras could. It captures the feeling of saying goodbye at the end of a beautiful day and realizing you can feel your smile hurting your face. It is so funny and haunting and beautiful. hoorayy has other great Empires and DSMP works as well! Highly recommend.

Like A Butterfly On A Pin; savannah_owl - E1 fWhip & Gem that is mostly about fWhip/Sausage, 1.7k oneshot. fWhip's down bad for the King of Mythland. Gem demands he sort his shit out before it goes sideways for all of them. You like vampires? <- said with a huge obnoxious grin. You like, specifically, vampires that are about desires that you can never entirely satisfy and desperate hungers set against necessity and morality? You like siblings who know each other too well fighting? You like loving descriptions of blood? Then I am shoving this fic into your hands and telling you to go read it now. Also! savannah_owl has SO much vampire fic for so many pairings across Empires, Life Series, and Hermitcraft; highly recommend 'em.

Hermitcraft

redstone signal fifteen; jibbingjibberish - S10 Etho/Zed, 4.3k oneshot. E-rated! Zed invites Etho over to test out his game-ified fucking machine! Really really fun redstone fucking machine shenaniganery, in, somehow, classic Hermit style. Delightful amount of attention paid to redstone mechanics (though I'll note I have no idea how close this does or does not get to being a build-able machine) and Etho's particular love of redstone machinery. Funny and charming and perfectly characterized.

Dusty Relics; MawoftheMagnetar - S9 Etho & Doc though mostly it's about Decked Out, 575 words. Doc's been investigating the artifakes Etho nabs for him from Decked Out 2. They're awfully good replicas, aren't they? Extremely fun-upsetting twist; don't worry, I won't ruin it for you.

slice of strawberry-flavored life; these_godforsaken_halls - Various Hermits and Lifers Animal Crossing AU, 6.8k oneshot. A glimpse into the lives of the employees and clients of Happy Hermit Housing! Listen, I think we don't give enough credit where it's due; writing hilarious, interesting, specific, well-characterized fluff is hard. And these_godforsaken_halls pulls it off with aplomb! Immaculate character voice, excellent bits, a sibling relationship that made me go, "Oh, yeah, this is genuinely how my brother and I talk to each other."

My Stupidest Intro Yet! | Hermitcraft 10; strifetxt - S10 Joel-centric, 1.4k oneshot. Hermitcraft Joel reckons with the fact that he is, at the time of this recording, the only active Joel around. Fun script-ish format of Joel making heartwarming discoveries about... himself? Truly so immeasurably charming. Joel voice so perfect I could see the video in my mind's eye. Had a grin on my face the whole time I was reading this.

Life Series

Of Love and Loyalty; Elycia7 - Martyn-centric character study, 1.2k oneshot. The evolution of Martyn's relationships and his understanding of these games from Third Life through to Limited Life. Look, when someone gets it, they get it. This person gets Martyn. Lovely and lyrical. I read it and clapped my real life actual hands and went, "Yep, that's Martyn!"

wait the worst is yet to come; glossyblue - Scar-centric Last Life AU in which you trade lives by making out. You ever read an AU that's just perfect for capturing the vibes and themes of the source material and then spinning them out into something wild and lovely? The blurring of death and violence and love and intimacy, the hilarity and the horror and the grief. All of it, right there! And Desert Duo is even kissing about it. It's gorgeous. (Also. Lots of great Life Series and Hermitcraft fic on the glossyblue account. Some of them made me laugh so hard I started coughing.)

choice and mercy; WolffyLuna - Double Life Scott & Cleo, 2.0k oneshot. Scott and Cleo talk about choice, death, and mercy, one night during Double Life. Really beautiful descriptions of what it feels like to have a limited number of lives and a really tender Scott & Cleo relationship that is sharpened and grounded by the ways they differ and tease and wordlessly understand. (WolffyLuna is an absurdly prolific writer who has almost certainly posted something somewhere in their extensive backlog that you will be interested in. Go take a look!)

and it's dark, and there is nobody driving; Sixteenthdays - Third Life Scott & Grian character study, 1.1k oneshot. Scott and Grian talk about making games for your friends. This particular game seems to have gone really, really bad. I love this one for how it translates the bright chipper friendly ways we know these people are/can be into the grief and exhaustion of a game where you kill your friends, taken dead seriously. Scott and Grian both feel so beaten-down and lost and trying to figure it out, and that vibe is conveyed so cleanly through the whole thing.

alternative solutions; soapflowers - Limited Life Scott & Martyn cannibalism, 311 words. Scott drags Pearl's lifeless body out of the water. He and Martyn eat her! It's a nice time. Do you like cannibalism and Mean Gills? Great. This fic is exactly that, with some really fun implications about death and respawn to boot.

Damn Yellow Composites; litbynosun - Secret Life Scar-centric character study, 1.1k oneshot. Scar goes back to Trader Scar's after the Secret Life finale. He takes care of his flowers. Extremely charming Scar narration. Extremely tender caretaking and attention to the mundane work of being alive in the world. Winding down, realizing you can tend to yourself and your surroundings, and also realizing you're alone.

something to keep you warm; codesandstuffs - Wild Life Tango-centric hurt/comfort, 2.8k oneshot. Three times Tango wakes up in Wild Life, and what he does after. Really truly the most impeccable Tango characterization. Delighted by the ways the details the narration chooses to linger on indicate the kind of person Tango is and the kind of history he's had. The mundane and the tender rendered beautifully.

[subaerial-dweller]

This is the final one of the night, I've decided it. Part four. OK! Here are my thoughts about Generation Loss characters, more specifically:

PART FOUR: CHARLIE SLIMECICLE

Charlie's a really cool character to think about, because he pops up in every single episode as a different character. Most of my other rants tonight have been theories, but this is more of a headcanon about how I believe Charlie came to be in Genloss and Showfall Media, but I'll be backing it up with evidence and things so don't worry about it.

Let's get cracking!

So the common belief, from what I've seen on Tumblr, is that we all seem to think that GL!Charlie grew up in that cabin from Episode 1, because it all looks very childish. Especially the bedroom. We've got a kid bed, a photo of Slimecicle as a child, the ducky thing on the desk, a small chair, a tennis racket, the whole thing. Anyway, so if Slimecicle was raised like that, damn. He lived his whole life to be that part, the Slime Demon. That's rough, Showfall Media. Even for you. Raising a kid for that?

My thought is, and this is where the heavy headcannoning comes in, so there will be little to no evidence from this point forward.

Have you ever read The Maze Runner? Spoilers up ahead if you haven't, so... yeah. In the prequel book, The Fever Code, the main bad guys (the morality surrounding them is complicated), WICKED, houses all these kids in a top secret facility to try to figure out a cure to the almighty plague thingy. These kids are all immune, except for some (*sobs*), and they're all special. And they form their own little bonds and it's all nice and sweet except for the unimaginable horror zombies and child experimentation.

ANYWAY.

That's what I'm imagining for Genloss. All these kids are in one facility, and they're being raised to be performers. I think GL!Charlie's one of these kids who lives in the dorms. But early on, I believe he was seen as a talented actor, so he was taken to live in his own little room, the cabin, so he could form an attachment to it. That's his main role, I believe, although he circles around in Episode 2 and 3 because Showfall thinks it's funny to see him there, but he's always the Slime Demon in Episode 1. And they raised him just for that, so that's why he has so many personal effects in his cabin, like the photo and the sports equipment. He even has his own portrait.

Anyway, I'm imagining him to still interact with the other kids, at lunchtime and break and stuff, when they're not working. I'd like to think that's how he meets other Main Cast, like Ranboo and Sneeg, as well as others like Niki, Austin, Frank (when he was still alive), Ethan, and Vinesauce. So he knows them as he's going into the show, but once they put him under, he forgets them and has no moral qualms about what he's doing.

Continuing with the Maze-Runner-ish thing (this isn't an AU I swear), I think he might've been given away by his parents at some point. Because has the photo, it could very well be a headshot, like actors put on their CV, or it could be a school photo from when he was actually outside. I saw exactly One Video about the book It Was Just Another Day In America by Ryan David Ginsberg (I'm going to read it when I have it), and the idea of selling your kids because you have no other choice is painful and dystopian and exactly what I think would happen in this Generation Loss world. The outside world, the audience (not us), is failing and collapsing but everybody is buying buying buying and everything is getting very very expensive so some people, if they want their kid to live, if they want to live themselves, well, there's no other choice. Showfall Media conveniently swoops in with an offer and pressures them til they can't say no, and takes their kid for a hefty sum and hopes the parents won't recognise them when they end up dying on live TV.

Does this happen for GL!Ranboo? I don't know. I like this idea of him meeting GL!Charlie and the others in the Showfall dorms, but I also like the idea of them just going missing one day, picked up off the streets and flung into this whole mess. I don't know if that was confirmed by the pre-release short videos they put out, I can't tell anything from those other than a sense of "oh fuck", but yeah. For Charlie, I like this headcanon.

Maze Runner style.

If I were to substitute characters out (I'm doing this for fun now, it isn't relevant to the headcanon), I'd do it like this:

Charlie Slimecicle - Thomas. He's kept apart from them, but he still sees them. He's an outsider and he's particularly special.

Sneegsnag - Alby. He's the leader of them, he's dry and bored. He's not as serious as Alby, but he seems the most confident, so he's the leader.

Ranboo - Newt? I think so. He seems pretty timid when I think of him, but they're rather chill and definitely aren't a pushover when it comes to interacting with the other characters. I think Newt works because they also would be the one to help out Charlie (Thomas) when he first comes down.

Frank could be anyone, really. I have no idea of his character. Minho is a very core character, obviously, and Frank could definitely fit that. Happy, upbeat, childish, a strong bond with Sneeg which would carry on even after he stops talking (whether from psychological damage or actual death, I dunno).

That's it for the night, folks! I'll be posting more of these. If you're sick of me, I'm sorry, it's just my random thoughts at this point.

[ducksbyday]

This post is for a very specific group of people

Headcanon that the dreamsmp was the first island owned by the federation, but it went horribly wrong (entire thing went boom.. multiple times..) so they just decided to redo it and "reset" a few of the survivors (Phil, BBH, Q, Tubbo, Foolish, Niki etc.).

The resetting didn't go quite as planned, because the eldritch horrors still kept some of their memories, although few (Foolish and BBH).

C!Dream was basically the dsmp version of Cucurucho (but gone mad); with C!Callahan being the dsmp version of the QSMP duck and Sam Nook being the Walter Bob of the world. (a.o. Sketchers, Fungi, Mars and Beckerson briefly served the purpose of the eggs but it went horribly south).

They got rid C!Tommy, because he was one of the main reasons everyone was going apeshit, and nerfed the players by giving them eggs to take care of so that nuclear explosions that could possibly end the world would be less likely (Also to hopefully stop Philza from starting an anarchist group.. It's not going well..).

They knew that BBH would lose it without Skeppy, but since Skeppy died by the egg they had to get.. creative. They put his soul into a diamond block because if they gave him his human body back it would be infected by the egg, which would cause the return of the Eggpire.

Meaning if BBH ever succeeds in giving Skeppy a vessel, he would doom the entire island to deal with the sickness once more.

(extra: the codes might be remnants of either Dreamxd trying to get power over the person people back or Karl trying to free his friends while being stuck in the other side)

(extra extra: the reason we have ElQuackity and Quackity is that Q is originally from the dsmp, while ElQ is originally from Karmaland)

[anachronistic-falsehood]

generation loss: it's not horror

a full review of genloss thus far. because fuck it i’m bored

So! Generation Loss, when Ranboo originally came up with the idea and talked about it publicly, was heavily implied to be some sort of analog horror series. He said, in multiple old streams, that he bought 90’s audio recorders and cameras in order to make it as authentic as possible. So, what exactly is the Generation Loss that we got?

Well, it's not horror, that's for sure. That's not to say it's objectively bad, however! I enjoyed it, to an extent, despite the bits that dragged on, the subpar improv acting, and the questionable writing choices. Ranboo, along with all of the other actors involved, have said that it is a horror series. Clearly, that was the intention. But none of it was scary. I know horror, and that wasn't it. "But Whiskey, it's psychological horror!" Okay. Where was the psychological horror? I get it, there are layers to it, and there are disturbing things when you pull them back (the green to red switch in episode 2, which implies that Charlie's outfit and the food he eats in episode 1 are also blood and gore instead of slime, which is a detail I did like), but overall... there's no real horror. The only times I felt something, like, truly got invested in the story and what was going on, was in two specific moments in episode 3: one, where Charlie was acting his heart out and yelling at Ranboo to hit the button, and two, the very end where Ranboo is begging to die. The rest of the show was relatively supbar to me. It's not horror, but if Genloss continues on the path it was taking in episode 3, it could definitely get there!

I'll talk about some details I did like first. I don't want to mercilessly attack the series and rip it to shreds, because there are good qualities in it that have a lot of potential, and ripping into things with pure hate on the mind rarely comes with good criticism. I will rag on it a bit, but I do want to focus on the potential of the series, because it clearly isn't over. Also I’m well aware that this was made by Ranboo and a bunch of his content creator friends and most of them aren’t professional actors so. I’ll cut them some slack

I have seen a lot of praise for episode 2 specifically. Not much for episode 1, understandably so, but I'll get into that later. Episodes 2 and 3 seem to be most people's favourites, and for good reason. Episode 2, as slow as it felt to watch through 2 hours of it, did have a lot of thought and detail put into it. The personas of the other streamers stuck in the trap, for one: Niki's emphasis on being "the nice one" as her best and only character trait, even as she's crying behind the scenes; Ethan’s slash text saying he’s unemployed, and being relatively unimportant and unnoticeable until someone else acknowledges him; Austin's splash text saying he's gay while he emphasizes that he has a wife and kids, which could either be a comment on how queer people are often made to hide their identities, or how someone's sexuality is often made the forefront of their public persona, etc. etc. Even their deaths, both Niki's and Ethan's being offscreen, were significant in playing into that symbolism! The dress-up bit dragged on a lot to me, but the fact that Ethan was the one who decided to start dressing up, put on a dress and a wig in some approximation of drag, and then was immediately killed off? And Ranboo, the "hero" only dressing himself up in a black jacket, like every single masculine protagonist in any action movie out there while still being controlled by Showfall? The queer themes of vague (very vague) gender fuckery are there. Ranboo being queer himself, it's hard to believe that the little queer bits would be a coincidence. There's a lot of filler (will touch on that later), but if you can parse through it, it is saying something. There's thought put into this, even if it's under a thick layer of ironic half assed comedy like a less articulate Dave Strider monologue.

Episode 3 was the best by far. Most of it was genuinely enjoyable, even if I did laugh at a couple of serious points that definitely weren't supposed to be funny (Ranboo stabbing someone was so funny to me, I'm sorry, I couldn't get over the >:[ "serious" face). The elements of horror did show themselves by the end, and laid down the foundation for a promising continuation of the series. The twist villain, Hetch, was introduced in the first one, and he was untrustworthy from the beginning, at least to me. It wasn’t a huge surprise when he suddenly switched up on Ranboo at the end, but it still got me a bit, which is good!! If you can guess the twist, or look back and see where the twist came from, you’ve done a good job setting it up! Also, The Truman Show-esque bow before the doorway was a good detail, and a great way to directly put it in your face that this is a series about escaping the narrative. The narrative is actively hurting these characters, and every moment they spend on camera is hell. It's about finding free will in a situation where it's hard to find any freedom at all (which, again, is another theme that can easily relate back to queerness). And of course, as soon as Ranboo bows and the curtain begins to close, Hetch drags him right back in, because there truly is no escaping the narrative in this world. Ranboo's last bid for freedom is to beg for death from the very audience they're being made to entertain, and they ultimately get it. That is his escape, his curtain call. He's gone from the narrative (supposedly; who knows what the future of Genloss holds?).

The point of saying all of this? So you know that my criticism comes from a good place. I can't say I liked watching Genloss, but I can't say I disliked it. Watching it was a bit of a drag, especially in the first and second episodes, but theorizing about something that clearly was meant to be theorized about is very fun :3

Let’s talk about my gripes with episode 1. I saw one post that described Genloss as “a comedy horror with no comedy or horror” and i have to agree. The comedy, most of the time, didn't land. A few jokes got me, but for the most part, the improv bits were... bad. They were bad. The cooking bit in the first episode went on way too long. I understand there were probably a lot of cool secrets hidden in there, but come on. It went on for, what, half an hour? To paraphrase one of my mutuals, "that's like 26 minutes after it stopped being funny." While watching ep 1, I stopped paying attention for about ten minutes to type out a list of horror series I enjoy that actually have horror in them, and all I missed was a boss fight sequence that was STILL going on by the time I finished. And the acting, in all honesty, was bad. It felt stilted and awkward and none of the characters held my attention long enough to get me invested in them. There is so much filler, even though we were told that the series would have little to none. Episode 1 was like watching a middle school project with a weirdly large budget.

Let's move on to my issues with episode 2.

Episode 2, as I've stated, had its strengths. The underlying themes and details were there, and it was easier to get invested long enough to want to peel back the bullshit to take a better look at what lies underneath. Some of the humour actually landed for me (although still not a lot). I'm not going to complain about the sets or the makeup and costuming, because I have little to no expertise in those fields, but I can speak on the writing. It was better than the first one. I can say that with confidence. Still, many parts of it were just too long. The Saw trap carousel bit dragged, as did the Mouse Trap bit, and the dress-up bit—you get the picture. There was still quite a bit of filler, even more so than the first one, considering its length, which is frustrating because, again, we were told there wouldn’t be much at all. I'm also no professional actor, but although I’m well aware this was made by a bunch of inexperienced content creators, the acting definitely left something to be desired. If Austin Show puts his whole pussy into a performance, then theoretically, it shouldn't overshadow the main character. It shouldn't make me root for this side character who's clearly going to die. But it did! I wanted Austin to live more than I wanted Ranboo to live, because his character had something. And I get it, Ranboo was being mind controlled, he's going to act a little spacey and clueless. But by the end of episode 2, I hadn't felt any personal connection to Ranboo's character at all. What reason did I have to want this guy to be our final girl in the movie who beats the bad guy and lives to tell the tale? The writing and acting for Ranboo’s character both kind of sucked overall. I felt nothing towards this guy. Absolute jack shit.

Let's talk episode 3. Arguably the best one out of the three, but not without its flaws. Hetch’s voice acting just sounded like any generic white boy streamer out there. It was very much "this is my first acting role so I'm going to talk how I normally do but a bit more exaggerated in hopes that it comes across as evil." Not very convincing. Also, the backrooms-esque TV-head monster was uninspired and unoriginal at best, and at worst, a complete wrench in the barebones plot there was. Why is there a monster here? What is it doing? Who made it? Why is it sentient? Why is it running free around this abandoned empty mall? It just felt like a complete cop out to have an "ooooh scary monster!!" in a lame attempt to have some semblance of real horror.

But, despite all of that, I genuinely enjoyed most of episode 3. Charlie's acting really got to shine when he was finally taken out of the role of the funny man and put into a scene that required some serious acting. He actually made me feel something. He's genuinely an amazing actor. Like, what the hell. Get this man an Oscar!!! The tension that was missing from the other two was actually present here, especially in the chase scenes. The stakes felt higher, and in the last scene, Ranboo’s acting really took off. It was fucking amazing. You could feel his desperation. Put this guy in more life or death situations! I wanna watch them scream for their life!!! (Also, the crucifixion imagery in that scene? Very well done. mmmmm I love me some good religious symbolism)

So if Genloss isn’t horror (yet), what is it? It’s not a comedy. It’s not action. The only genre I can think of that it might fit into is a mystery hidden under a thick guise of unfunny sitcom-adjacent improv humour. There are things to look for and find out on your own, but there are five layers of bullshit to wade through before you can get to anything of substance.

I think my biggest gripe about Genloss is that it’s clearly made for Ranboo fans. Despite being advertised in Times Square, this is mostly made to be watched and enjoyed by people who already know and care about who he is. They will go into Genloss with a positive outlook on the series before even watching it, knowing beforehand that it’s meant to be some sort of mystery, with the intention of theorizing about it and praising it afterwards. If you went up to a horror fan who doesn’t know who Ranboo is and has never heard him speak about Genloss before, and told them that this series was a horror, they would watch it and think “in what universe does this qualify as a horror?” Your average horror fan would watch Genloss and be confused as to why it’s apparently considered to be a horror series. The first episode is its weakest point. Anyone outside of Ranboo’s fan circle who watches it wouldn’t know that it’s meant to be a mystery or a horror. They would sit through an hour of bad improv and come out the other side confused, and probably not interested enough to watch the second one. As I said in another post, watching Genloss is like watching a hurdle race where the racer trips right out of the blocks, falls over every single hurdle along the way except for the last couple, and sprints through the finish line while tripping and falling right after. The first episode is even worse when you’ve watched the last one, because you can see the potential the series fails to live up to in the very beginning.

BUT! But but but! It still has potential. The ending of episode 3 was honestly really good, at least in comparison to the rest of the series. If Ranboo decides to continue taking the series in the direction that episode 3 went in, it could be something good. My expectations are very low, but my hopes are high. I think they can genuinely make something out of Genloss, maybe not quite on par with most other horror series, but they could get there if they try. It just depends on where Ranboo and their team take it from here.

When Generation 2 comes out, I’ll probably watch that too. The ending intrigued me! Idk what the fate of gl!Ranboo is, whether he’s actually dead or not, what happens to the others, if Hetch and Showfall have bigger plans for Ranboo, etc etc. I’ll admit it!! I’m curious!!! I don’t know if Generation Loss as it is now was worth all the hype and buildup, but maybe eventually it will be.

[crowncrown]

Genloss is rotting my brain so SPOILER WARNING!

Thoughts :

1. Is showfall censoring the perception of the characters as well or just the audience ?

The obvious choice seems to be the first. Ranboo seemed to practically turn into an NPC about halfway through episode 2 today and go into auto pilot, which would insist that they really don’t know what’s going on. This also ties into when the hat is put on Sneeg and he is completely horrified by the room around him because he’s finally seeing the truth for the first time.

But what if showfall is just censoring their reactions? What if these characters can see everything that is going on around them and are rendered fully incapable of showing any emotion about it because of the mind control? This adds such a deeper level of horror to the slimecicle “saw scene” for lack of better words because this would mean that Ranboo is trapped inside his own head, fully aware he is killing someone and not only incapable of stopping himself but incapable of reacting to it at all.

2. Niki’s character is not only so unsettling, but beautifully acted

We are introduced to these characters on the carousel and you’re instantly gravitated towards her. She’s terrified. She’s sobbing. She has so much to live for and you want to save her! Why wouldn’t you want the only character who seems deeply human to survive this? But the moment she gets the chance to argue for her own life to be saved the act drops, she doesn’t even wipe the tears off of her face, and a plastered smile takes over her persona. Her emotions switch fast enough to give you whiplash and you can’t even process it before they’re moving onto the next.

The switch up was so well acted by Niki (she is so incredible I love her sm) and added such a twist, making you question if she should be saved, if she’s being mind controlled, if she’s a decoy, or if she’s really terrified and just doing anything she can to be saved by our protagonist.

3. Who was jerma????

The second the hat was put on Sneeg, Jerma froze so hard I had to check if my stream was buffering. He was scared and had no clue how to react, as if he was about to ask for his next like on the script. He wasn’t a diabolical villain like you would first assume from the saw-esque traps going on, he was just another mind controlled guy. So did he actually get killed by showfall? What did he do to warrant his murder? Was his death just the same as Sneeg and Slime in the last episode? Will he be recasted again in the finale?

4. And this leads me to my last thought, are these characters the same person being mind controlled differently?

Slime and Sneeg specifically were two separate people compared between the two episodes, while Ranboo is the same person going through out the game.

Sneeg and slime both referenced back to when they were in the games, with sneeg mentioning playing the cooking game and slime playing mousetrap and eating the cage.

So does this insist that Ranboo will be cast into these games for the next hero if he fails? Or are these separate people completely?

This project had been SO incredibly cool so far and after seeing how episode 2 completely changed the entire perception of the first episode, I can’t wait to do it all again with the finale and get my mind absolutely blown. Ranboo is so incredible and I can’t believe I’ve been here since he was goofing around with this idea originally.

[the-splendiferous-winter]

This is Shavia J. Anneliese. I am here with the aim of looking for friendships that will take me to surfing in the world of X. I go by ‘her’ as my pronounce, I’m on legal age–by prioritizing account comfort so that underage people are not on my account, I apologize profusely for limiting this. I will limit it if your account contains NSFW and 18+ stuff. Then, feel free to FUB me if you feel uncomfortable with my account and my interactions. I emphasize that, DO NOT FOLLOW ME WITHOUT ANY CONSENT unless you get permission and include a specific reason.

IMPORTANT.

I love to watching some movie and series (Horror, thriller, fantasy, scie-fi, action, anime, comedy-romance). I put my attention on K-Pop; STAYC, IVE, AESPA, ZEROBASEONE, EVNNE, RIIZE, TREASURE, and BOYNEXTDOOR. I am interested in things related to art, poetry, quotes and the world of cinema. I started to be interested in reading several books, starting with fantasy and historical genre novels. My musical tastes range from a variety of songs, but there are a few artists that really suit my tastes; Taylor Swift, Niki Zevanya, Chrisye, Tulus, Hindia, Dewa19, Tiara Andini, JKT48, Maliq & D'essentials, and several Ibu Kota artists that I love.

DNI

MINOR, always discussing about 18+ and NSFW stuff, do not like one maybe more than my list of interests, problematic, mind if I interact noisily.

[mistylip]

Favoritism.

here is the second place for material, which contains my favorite things and what usually becomes hyped up things through my tweets. you need know all the specifics are in this, and here it is:

MUSIC

i put in order the usual i often listen to their masterpiece albums is Taylor swift, The 1975, LANY, The ivy, Oasis, Green day, Radiohead, Valley, Gracie abrams, Keshi, Lana del rey, The weeknd, NIKI and others. i'm also a charmer Galau Indo Songs and whatever the title is. for other preferences, i am also a connoisseur of Japanese songs, regardless of the genres and i'm fancy khh and krnb too.

MANHWA

for that i still often read LOOKISM until now. will thoroughly mention some of the other manhwas i'm currently reading Muse on fame, The real lesson, How to fight, Operation: True love, Manajer kim, Omniscient reader, Weak hero, Daddy goes to school, Study Group, and others. i pay more attention to the action genre which i find enjoyable to read and i stan PTJ universe.

K-POP

and it also happens that i don't have too many other kpop stans. there are only a few that i pay more attention to, such as Nct Dream, Itzy and Aespa. i'm also a connoisseur of Blackpink & Le sserafim but not too much hyping up about them. mentioning some of my biases among the group, i put it at the end.

MOVIES & SERIES

i set my eyes on Hannah Montana: the movie lately and i also happen to be watching the series. fantasy and thriller-themed series are still the best choice for me, Stranger Things. if there is a question about what genre do I like? romcom, slice of life, thriller & horror, action. 90s-2000s is still my favorite choice of movies to date like the princess diaries 1 & 2, wild child, mean girls, aquamarine, clueless, legally blonde, 10 things i hate about you and others. and lastly, the comedy series is still fun to watch until now Victorious.

BIASSES

first and foremost, i designated shin ryujin as my ultimate bias and hwang yeji as my bias wrecker in Itzy. Then, on Nct dream, as you may know, i am a huge fan of na jaemin then lee jeno as my bias wrecker and on Aespa, i made karina (yu jimin) my ultimate bias role. for the last one, i really set my eyes on jennie kim and huh yunjin.

GAMES

i am interested in video games, such as Resident Evil all seasons, The Last of Us, and Detroit: Become Human. for your information, i also played Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare, and i have completed all of the missions in that game and only in that season— and I still don't have a big possibility of continuing the next few of those seasons or series.

[asbestieos]

i was digging througj old discord messages and found more crazyb niki-centric horror that i thought up!! what the hell was going on in early ens era asta’s mind . under a readmore because theres a lot theres so much

(auto) cannibalism mentions, starvation, silly severe depression moment, zombies//

niki becomes the patient zero of Unidentified Zombie Disease, but he isnt 'turning' the way popular media depicts the undead usually do, and thus no one - including himself - notices at first. but slowly over the course of weeks, his hunger stops being satiated by normal food. at one point, he furiously cooks up meals of all types in a vain attempt to please his tastebuds - to no avail - sweets are the first to go, then fruits, vegetables. finally, even meat stops filling his stomach. in fact, everything is making him sick enough to vomit. its pointless to keep trying to cook and eat when he cant keep anything down. but his nose is sharper than ever, and its telling him the people around him are delicious - not just the sweet-smelling mayoi, but also alkaloid, his audience, his circle friends. kohaku, himeru, rinne. himself.

when niki stops cooking, rinne takes it as another depression period. niki's known for them; hes either cooking, working, or laying in his room staring at the ceiling. thus, rinne's several solutions include forcing him to eat take-out, stealing multivitamins and supplements to forcefeed him, waterboarding him showering niki himself to keep him from stinking up the apartment, even slipping him sleeping medication to see if a good rest would alleviate the hunger - the usual things that push niki out of his depressive state. when he comes back to the apartment to see niki gnawing on himself, though, he realizes something is deeply, deeply wrong, especially when niki looks so inexplicably skinny, feels so horribly cold, seems more like a wild animal than an actual person,

rinne asks him, very firmly and seriously, what the fuck is wrong with him. niki says he doesnt know, but rinne smells really good to him. he says he wants to eat him. not as a joke. really eat him. rinne can tell by the way niki drools -and, like, the literal inches of flesh missing off niki's arm- that this is true, and if rinne didnt have a strong grip on him, niki mightve actually tried. for the very first time ever in his life, rinne considers calling 911 but mentally berates himself instead and decides to simply have a unit meeting to figure out How In The Hell To Proceed with this

the solution is kohaku gives niki the dead bodies of those he's commissioned to kill /joke

[mishkakagehishka]

who are ur other top5 yands

Oh, do you mean in general, in enstars, or specifically talking ab that tag where I said "top 5 yands who'd try to collect your spit to keep in a little bottle/necklace charm"

Currently my top5 yands in general are my top5 enstars (per my headcanons of them as) yands since I'm really into enstars rn, so those are Mika, Hajime, Izumi, Chiaki and Shu. Mika is personal bias lol, Hajime and Chiaki would make for interesting yands, and Shu has the bonus of dollification which is a trope I like in horror-adjacent media like that. And Izumi's just Izumi.

As for top5 (also enstars) yands who'd keep your spit. Mika. Mayoi. Niki (he replaces it regularly because he. Well. Drinks it/puts it in his food). Natsume (it's a "love charm"). Leo.

Bonus: Ritsu keeps blood in a necklace charm.

[writingwithcolor]

Arab Character Joining Corrupt Superheroes, Police Parallels

Anonymous asked:

I’m writing a story with a Arabian diaspora main character. The story is about corrupt superheroes, and how they affect an oppressed superpowered minority. The main character is one of these superheroes, naively joining them in his teens believing he’s going to help people. Doesn’t help that his parents are having money trouble. Eventually he ends up fighting a superpowered crook, and gets a bystander killed.

1)I know portraying an Arabian character committing violence is a pretty touchy subject, even if accidental. Is there any way I can write this that makes it clear to the reader that the action itself is messed up without the unfortunate implication that Arabs are violent? 

2)A large part of the story is the MC’s parents reaction. They are loving parents, however after this incident happens, they are confused and ashamed. While they still love him, they temporarily cut ties with him. Eventually they reconcile and start to be a family again. In my research (they are diaspora Saudi Arabians), Family is very important and tight-nit. Shame towards the family is to be avoided at all costs. However I’ve also read that disowning a family member rarely ever happens. Is there a way to write this kind of narrative with respect to this aspect of Arabian culture?

Let us begin with some terminology.

- If a person is from Saudi Arabia, they are Saudi Arabian, or more commonly, Saudi. This is their nationality.

- They may or may not be Arab. Arab is an ethnicity. Not all Saudis are Arab. Not all Arabs are Saudi.

- Arabic is a language. Lots of people across the world who are neither Saudi nor Arab speak Arabic.

- Arabian on its own is a word used to refer to a specific breed of horses.

If you are referring to humans, you want to either say "Saudi Arabian" (both words) or “Saudi” to indicate nationality, or "Arab" to indicate ethnicity. If you’re looking to describe your character’s culture, you probably want to call it Saudi culture. (While grammatically correct, talking about “Arab culture” doesn’t make much sense because Arabs are an incredibly diverse ethnic group and there is no such thing as a single monolithic Arab culture).

Now for the first question. In my mind, the issue is less about the character committing violence, and more about the premise of the story and how it mirrors real-life oppressive structures. You have an organized group of superheroes who think they are doing good by fighting “crooks” but in reality are enacting systemic oppression upon a marginalized group. This immediately brings to mind police violence, racial profiling, and the way that policing in North America is used as a tool of white supremacy while glorified in propaganda as a force for good. Essentially, you are telling a story about a character who joins an oppressive policing force, enacts violence upon a marginalized group as a result, and (I’m assuming) eventually realizes that they are not, in fact, the good guys. This is very close to being a “bigoted character learns not to be bigoted” story. I recommend re-examining your premise in light of the real-life parallels and asking yourself whether this is the story you want to tell. 

The issue is compounded by the fact that your character is an Arab teen, who in real life is more likely to be the one facing racial profiling from the police. Taking this character and making him the oppressor in your story makes the already flawed premise even more problematic, especially if the characters in the oppressed group are white.

As for your second question, it seems believable to me that a teen’s parents might reject him if they learned that he committed a crime. However, when the family in question is Arab, you are suddenly feeding into harmful tropes about oppressive and violent Arab parents. You are asking if there is a way to write this respectfully. I believe that there is, but it requires a great deal of care, nuance, and cultural awareness. While it is possible to write a Saudi Arab character grappling with the consequences of violence and familial estrangement in a compelling way, the way your ask is phrased leads me to believe you are not equipped to do it justice. 

- Mod Niki

Think about why Arab people committing violence is a touchy subject, and then think about the general propaganda narrative that came about from the act that made things so touchy. 

It’s going to sound one hell of a lot like what you have here.

Military and police use buckets and buckets of propaganda to continue hooking in young, impressionable teens to commit state-sanctioned colonialism and oppression. That propaganda looks suspiciously like “we have health insurance, we will pay for your education, you just have to do what we tell you even if that means hurting or killing others, but it’s okay because you get to be the hero in the situation.”

Now, propaganda is a very powerful tool. I was taught, in my media classes, that controlling the message means shaping reality. The media is built as a propaganda machine, and when you start to see who owns what media properties you start to see some really disturbing patterns (Rubert Murdoch owns a lot of right-wing sources across America, the UK, and Australia, and he’s too rich to investigate his culpability in spinning terrible narratives found in right-wing publications. He owns the big names).

As Niki said, this situation mirrors police violence and police-sanctioned terrorism. And the very, very unfortunate implications of making the target of police violence be in that wheel. But I want you to look at the media situation that has made the plot happen.

Because even if you swapped out ethnicities, you’d still have a reckoning to do with the American culture that their primary social safety nets involve killing people.

I am not kidding.

Some of the most well-funded unions in the country are police unions. These people have pensions. They have health insurance. It’s damn near impossible to fire them. They get overtime very well mandated, and it’s a known thing among defence lawyers that arrests happen right before a cop’s shift will end so they get the overtime of filing the paperwork. They absolutely go into poor neighbourhoods and recruit based off people needing an escape, and them having the money to provide it.

A similar sentiment is true for the military, except they push for college education a bit more and don’t really have overtime, but they do have deployment bonuses. So the way to get extra pay for yourself is to go out and do colonialism outside the borders. The military doesn’t necessarily like it when the economy is doing well, and don’t like the idea of college being affordable, because they rely so heavily on poverty and fear of college debt to recruit. 

The story you’re telling here goes so far beyond an individual’s actions and instead taps into America’s single biggest cultural investment: that oppressing others makes you a hero. 

The Pentagon funds most military media out there as a propaganda tool, including most superhero movies and a large number of video games. This is in their budget. They will also go so far as to literally commission the games to exist. Part of getting that funding is you cannot critique America’s military, basically at all (the only exception I’ve seen is Ms Marvel, but that’s set in the 90s). This turns any sort of military-using media into a potential propaganda tool.

And the thing is? Even if you fall for that propaganda and were part of the military or the police, you still have to reckon with the fact you put whatever your own desires were above a huge track record of those groups being terrible. You still have to reckon with the fact you didn’t realize they were wrong, and were complicit in a lot of crimes.

This goes very far beyond “the action is terrible” and goes into “the system is rotten to its core, and you chose not to believe it, or to believe you could change what was built with blood.”

“Good” police officers get fired. If you try to question anything, if you try to say this action is wrong, you will absolutely get destroyed. Military’s much the same. You need some degree of buy-in to the concept of white supremacy to sign up for the military or the police, because you need to see their actions as not deal breakers instead of actions that violate multiple international laws. 

In short: you need to see the people being oppressed as deserving of being oppressed to some degree in order to participate with police and the military.

Marginalized people can hold this belief, it happens. But that is a very sticky situation that outsiders shouldn’t touch. 

It’s possible but difficult for you to write a white person having this sort of arc, but it would be extremely challenging to have it not come across as a white guilt story. To not have a socially aware audience roll their eyes at how long it took. You’d definitely not be writing a story with a diverse audience in mind, because you’d mostly appeal to those who saw the propaganda as just fine and not that bad.

This isn’t even getting into the oft-cited adage that boys who bully others become cops, while girls who bully become nurses. And the more police atrocities become mainstream news, the less and less people can convince themselves that becoming a police officer is a good thing.

Which brings me to the point of: how well-documented is this oppression? Is this character walking around in an oppressive situation like, say, pre-social-media where there was no direct access to the oppressed groups and you could close your eyes and look away even if it made national news? Or is this in a media connected world where these oppressed populations have a voice in the narrative?

The former has an angle of the character slowly realizing the horror and it’s slightly more forgivable for their early ignorance. But in any sort of world where there’s access to the people getting hurt? Things get more and more “ignorance is indistinguishable from maliciousness.” And keep in mind, these stories are read in the real world, where police brutality and war crimes go viral, and a lack of knowledge is getting harder and harder to defend as a position.

Media plays a huge role in shaping our perception of what’s happening. Cameras on a situation makes different activism tactics work, as we can see with how activism changed in the 60s and 70s as tv reached the masses. Social media has made it possible for you to look up firsthand accounts of discrimination within seconds. 

This is a factor you are absolutely going to have to consider, when you want to look at how nice your hero is seen by marginalized or otherwise socially-aware people. If there is a way to find out how bad this superhero organization is before you sign a contract with them? Then that doesn’t look particularly good on the “hero”. You’d really have to establish them as super idealistic, super sheltered, super desperate, and/or just swallow the knowledge that they really don’t see anything that happens “over there to those people” as that bad. 

All of the above is more than possible. And they’d still be seen as complicit no matter what justification you gave, because they are.

Does this mean all corrupt organization stories are off limits? No. The reason these stories have such deep cultural resonance right now is because of the propaganda I outlined above. 

But you as the author are going to have to examine your own engagement with the propaganda narrative and do your own private reckoning so your own sense of guilt and compliance doesn’t bleed through the narrative too strongly, so you can tell a good story instead of an overt message story that’s you working out your own feelings.

By all means, write a story where police and the military are taken down, where propaganda is weaponized and the media is controlled (because that’s sure as hell the modern world). 

But know that stories where the hero discovers the corruption already have a ticking clock because we, in the real world, are slowly being faced with a mountain of apathy instead of ignorance. The knowledge of oppression is out there so much that marginalized people are tired of the ignorance defence. 

As the saying goes, “privilege is the ability to ignore the oppression of others.” 

Propaganda, centralized media, and strategic cultural investment made it possible for police and the military to have a chokehold on their public perception. But that’s changing. The chokehold is starting to fade, people are starting to question their beliefs. 

The past year has shown that knowledge isn’t the issue; it’s white supremacy. People don’t want to believe that any of this is that bad. People want to believe that oppression is justified, that if people just followed the law they’d be fine. They don’t want to question themselves. And marginalized people are tired of these narratives where, suddenly, people snap out of it. Because there was so much evidence to show it was bad, but it was only when you do one of the worst crimes imaginable that you realize this is bad? It’s only when it becomes personal that things are worth looking at critically?

No. And you need to examine where you are in processing your own complicity before writing a story where you’ve swapped around the ethnicities to try and distance yourself from the problem, where in the end you made the target the oppressor.

~Mod Lesya

[redherringtime]

TMA Ch 1-20 Review

I’ve finished chapters 1 through 20 of The Magnus Archives so I had a little chat about it with Sketch and I drew a quick picture of how Jon looks in my head.  I have seen fanart of Jon before and I’m certain that it has influenced my visualization of him, but I tried to divorce myself from that as much as possible.  Conversation under the cut.

Sketch: Do you have a favorite character yet? Niki: I don’t honestly think it’s possible for me to have a favorite character yet because the only characters who I’ve gotten any actual characterization for are Jon and the one-off people who provide the statements.  Any other characters I’ve only seen through Jon’s eyes and even then it’s been mostly in a work setting with only a few comments thrown in like Martin is incompetent and Tim is a playboy.  Jon hasn’t commented much on Sasha personality-wise, now that I think on it.  And there is one other investigator... I can’t remember their name...

Sketch: That’s fair.  I have a few favorites, but I can’t share them yet for spoilery reasons.  You know a couple of them, a couple you don’t.

Do you have a favorite episode so far?

Niki: I wouldn’t say that I have a favorite, but I do have some that stand out above the others and that I find myself thinking about more.  Anglerfish was a really good introduction; it said exactly what it needed to to draw me in and make me want more.  Do Not Open told me that I couldn’t expect the typical from this podcast.  Page Turner gave me hints of a deeper story that made me really start wanting to know more about the world.  Vampire Killer I just really loved for the way vampires were portrayed.  It seemed more... real than typical vampire stories.  Dreamer was the first one that really set my brain spinning, along with The Bone Turner’s Tale.  I don’t think I could put any of those above the others, but they’re my favorites so far.

Sketch: I think for me, out of the first twenty episodes, my favorites are Anglerfish, Thrown Away, and Squirm.  Like you said, Anglerfish is a pitch perfect opening.  I like Thrown Away specifically because we don’t get all the answers, and it leaves us searching for more.  Yearning for clues we may never have.  It’s a good way to show that the statements are just that: statements.  Not all of them have clean endings, and we may never get to know the full story.  It’s an interesting concept to me, and it keeps me wanting to come back and listen to it again.  Squirm is just... very well written and efficient at being unnerving.  It’s a testament to Jonathan’s writing, as most of the episodes are.  This was the first one to really freak me out, and it stuck with me because of that.

What episode creeped you out the most?

Niki: To be completely honest, I’ve found some episodes a little gross (Squirm, The Man Upstairs) and I’ve appreciated the spooky ambience of some (Anglerfish, Vampire Killer), but I don’t think I would say any of them creeped me out or really unsettled me.  The closest that came to actually upsetting me was Lost Johns’ Cave because of the claustrophobia and underground aspects, but it was mild.

Sketch: Like I said, Squirm freaked me out the most.  It actually f***ed me up a bit.  Something about the imagery of having sex with someone, and then watching them explode from the inside out with squirming, maggoty worms?  No thank you, no, nope.  They said that they burnt the place down and I was relieved.  

I honestly appreciate that, by the way.  The characters don’t follow a lot of horror movie tropes.  They don’t open the coffin, they don’t follow the anglerfish, and when someone inexplicably explodes into a pile of maggots, they go “I’m out” and burn every single last one.  It’s a nice change of pace from “I’m gonna bring this cursed heirloom in my house, certainly nothing could go wrong!”

Niki: Agreed.  I like how clever the Do Not Open guy was in avoiding opening the coffin.

Sketch: Do you have any criticisms for the podcast?

Niki: I hesitate to present any criticisms at this point because I’m so early on that they may be things that improve or are explained as I progress.  As you know, the only episode I really criticized was Alone and I think the biggest problem I had with it was that it was written the same as all the previous written statements despite being presented as a person telling their story aloud.  It failed to account for the very different ways people communicate in writing verses speaking off the cuff.  It wasn’t my favorite plotline, either, but it was the delivery that really threw me off and as that’s the first and only guest presenter that I’ve encountered, I can’t really make any general critiques based on that.

Sketch: Yeah, that’s fair.  My main criticism is a severe lack of ambience in the background.  I know Jon and the statements are the main focus so it makes sense that there wouldn’t be much, but also, this is an old building.  I want to hear it creaking and groaning, I want to hear some movement- something to make me feel more immersed.  Not a lot, just... Something.

I can’t really give much other criticism than that for this early in the series, though.  I’ll give more once we’re deeper in.

Niki: I don’t know if I agree with that or not.  I feel like in the midst of recording a statement it might pull me out of the story.  Hmm, I’m not sure.

Sketch: Last question for now, I think, though there will be more in the future.  Do you have any running theories you want to share that you feel confident in?

Niki: Confident in? No. I’m confident that there’s more to Gertrude than meets the eye but I can think of any number of possibilities that it might be, all wildly different and probably all wildly incorrect.  Most of what I have now are ideas about things I should pay attention to because it feels like they’ll be important later.  From the very obvious Jurgen Leitner books to the less smack-you-over-the-head things like the not-Grant?  Uh?  Not-Greg?  I can’t remember his name, but from Across the Street.  The lady in the red dress from Squirm.  The Cult from A Father’s Love.  There’s a few other things, but any theories I have about them are tenuous and mostly consist of if-thens.

Sketch: Fair enough!  I once again can’t put literally any input into this answer but just know that I’m really excited to hear your theories in the future.

Niki: I’ll try to remember to put them in my reactions as they come up XD

[tlbodine]

The House

Hey, do you like anthology films? Stop motion animation? Furries? 

The House (2022) is a trio of short films, all written by  Enda Walsh but directed by  the duo of Emma de Swaef and Marc James Roels, Niki Lindroth von Bahr, and Paloma Baeza, respectively. 

Each of the stories takes place in the same house, although the specific circumstances of the house differ significantly from tale to tale. All of them have kind of similar themes, but they’re very different stories. 

The first is about a poor family who are given a too-good-to-be-true deal: They can move into a beautiful newly made home and have all their needs cared for, but first they have to leave everything of their old life behind. 

The second is about a home renovator and realtor who is trying desperately to show and sell this newly revamped house, but has a bit of a pest problem...to put it mildly. 

The third is about a landlady whose home is crumbling away into the sea. She has only two tenants left, who don’t pay her in a way she can use to revamp the house. When they have the opportunity to leave for something new, they try to urge her to come along. 

All the segments are stop-motion animated with felt puppets. The characters in the first movie are human, but in the second they are mice and in the third they are cats. 

The first segment is clearly horror, it is deeply unsettling and has some extremely uncomfortable visuals. The other two segments are also horror-adjacent. The one with the mice/rats leads more into dark absurdist comedy, while the one with the cats is more of a dreamy existential musing on life and decay.

Overall I enjoyed this a lot, because I have a big soft spot for anthology films, stop motion animation, animal characters, AND weird stories. This was pretty much a guaranteed home run. 

However, it did leave me feeling a bit....hm. There are a few places where there are some...classist implications...and it’s not wholly clear which person is necessarily meant to be in the wrong. Maybe I’m just resentful of being made to sympathize with a landlord, even if she is a cat. But it’s just....hmm. The third short in particular raised an eyebrow. That the tenant who cannot pay her in money but pays in fish instead happens to be a black cat wearing a beanie....is that significant? That she is ultimately sad and betrayed when he leaves her behind, implying that she really cared about him, is THAT significant? What’s....what’s going on with this whole cat sequence? 

I don’t think this is a movie that is well-suited to interpreting through a systemic lens. I think the stories are very personal, very rooted in individualism, and that vein of conservativism isn’t nasty or maybe even intentional. Just present, and a bit weird to see in an art film. 

[orionshounds]

I’ve been knee deep in dsmp lore streams and I just want to ramble about it

Dream smp lore is so good, it’s so good!!! Not only is the story itself just fascinating, but how it’s presented so uniquely through the medium of minecraft of all things is just so cool. One of my favorite parts of the lore is seeing how everyone on the smp has their own “style” they present it in, and watching them find the way they find the most enjoyment in is so cool. Literally no two streamer’s lore stream quite like each others and it’s just incredible! It just speaks to the flexibility of roleplay as an artistic medium and really shows everyone’s individual personalities. 

Wilbur was dramatic as hell and wrote eloquent speeches. He started a drug operation under the guise as a country, and it lead to a revolution in which he was able to explore the spiral of a man who loses control of everything he had built. And after his arc and he wanted a break from the server? He created ghostbur, an amnesic comic relief with just enough touch of tragedy that he is still able to make heartbreaking monologues when he wants to.

Tommy is able to run around with his friends and cause as much chaos to his heart’s extent, but there is so much more than meets the eye. He is incredibly social and isn’t afraid to start conflict with a lot of people, bringing them into the roleplay. He doesn’t back down from storytelling either. His character goes through terrible situations and he fully explores the trauma that comes from those experiences. His character goes against the “stereotypical” trauma I see alot in media; instead of being shy or scared he’s reactionary, he’s angry, he’s violent, he’s depressed. I’m actually really impressed with the heavy subject matter this 17 year old teen has managed to portray (I’ve connected with it quite personally at certain points), while still being able to keep the light hearted fun that’s so intrinsic to his personality. 

Tubbo isn’t really interested in serious lore as much. Even in dire moments he tells jokes and just has fun. So, in his recent lore, he just streams as normal while putting mysterious writing on screen that he doesn’t acknowledge or have to explain, which I think is just a genius work around for him to participate in lore. He still has his dedicated lore streams sometimes, and when he is in the acting zone he has some of the most powerful moments out of everyone on the server.

Ranboo, while having stake in the greater smp lore, is much more character focused. He presents his lore through long monologues and fucking heart-wrenching voice acting. He loves working in themes of horror and causing a specific feeling in the viewer. So he chooses specific music as a themes for events/characters and creates visual queues in his overlays to draw out that desired reaction. He also values improve a LOT, if something unexpected comes up he just runs with it and he has made huge changes to his lore as early as 30 min before a stream.

Technoblade, while arguably one of the most powerful people on the server, prefers a more light-hearted yet dramatic approach to lore. When Dream was at his house looking for Tommy, Techno had no problem joking around and making fun of him for being homeless. He tore down an entire nation on the server and had so much fun doing it! He’s more of an antagonist than a true villain in my opinion. And lets not forget how dedicated he is to the game, he’s cracked at the craft. He spends hours grinding and creating farms on the smp, for amazing pay offs (his several vault reveals, the withers, etc), most of which weren’t even on stream!

Karl Jacobs is extremely social, so he created Tales from the smp as a way to involve TONS of people in lore while exploring the past and future of the server (it was also a way for viewers who weren’t that well versed in dsmp lore to join and not have to worry about it!). And through this premise, he took the opportunity to develop his own character on the smp; making an incredibly tragic story of a time traveler trying to save his home while slowly loosing his memories. Not to mention the beautifully shot cutscenes of the Inbetween and the Other Side. He includes so many people behind the scenes as well, collabing with other members on lore, hiring building teams and people to make intros and credit scenes, and promoting fanart and fansongs from the community!

Quackity explores his lore through heavily scripted events and amazingly shot cut scenes. While the way he expresses his lore comes at the cost of improv, the payoff of the visuals and story is well worth it! The shots he makes of the smp is downright gorgeous, no to mention he’s the first person to include irl footage in his lore (not counting facecams)! He’s not afraid of thoroughly examining his own character, being one of the only people I can think of that shows us “past events” leading up to something that has already happened.

Badboyhalo, Antfrost, Ponk, Skeppy, Captain Puffy, Punz, Awesamdude, Hannahxxrose all work together on shared lore and the payoff is amazing! By introducing the Egg, a constant antagonistic force that constantly pulls on character’s relationships with each other, everyone is able to stream together to battle for or against the egg! There’s also plenty of room for people to do individual lore that's more intimate to their respective character. They spend hours changing vines, putting up posters, slowly shaping the smp in a way that makes it exciting to watch streams to see just what has changed everyday. Because there’s so many people necessary to tell the egg’s story, it does comes at the cost of time (the egg has been around FOREVER). However, they all work together super hard and I just admire their commitment to the story they’re trying to tell!

And Sam! He has several different “Modes” his character is in (and an entirely separate character, Sam Nook) that he gets to explore lore with. He’s a terrifying warden, he’s a money motivated businessman, he’s a conflicted lover, he’s a traumatized victim of the egg, and just so much more. Through having so many different “roles” in the rp he gets to explore relationships and plotlines with a whole array of people. Not to mention he’s absolutely cracked at redstone and has some of the most impressive builds on the server.

And Puffy! So much of her lore is calling into question the morality of the server and really makes you step back and think critically about the characters. Her character also has, in my opinion, one of the most interesting relationships with Dream, the main antagonist of the entire server, which is just fascinating to watch unfold. Not to mention she’s one of the first people to start exploring the backstory of her character!

George doesn’t exactly do lore. In fact he’s slept through so much of it it’s become a meme. And you know what? That mad man took that and ran with it. He explains his absence in the story by having his character literally being asleep through it, creating mystery where there used to just be an absence. He’s able to goof off with his friends and have borderline nonsensical streams, then at the end sucker punch the audience emotionally by “waking up” and have the viewers question just what was real and what wasn’t?

The smp has the freedom for people who want more independent lore to be able to explore their character’s that way as well!

Hbomb, Connereatspants, and Purpled don’t have a lot of lore on the smp, generally only coming on to have fun with everyone, but when they do have their moments it unfolds in very interesting ways!

Sapnap, Eret, and Schlatt maybe aren’t as active as some other people, but when they are on they actively participate in lore and have lasting impacts on the story (Ex: Eret’s betrayal, Sapnap’s visit to dream in the prison, Schlatt becoming president).

Philza mostly does his own thing, improving the server or making some bomb ass builds. He has incredibly devastating roles in lore (killing wilbur, blowing up L’manberg for the final time, starting the syndicate with Techno), but he also has quieter moments that speak to the depth his character has, such as fishing with fundy or reminiscing about his dead son and how it went so wrong. Like Techno, he doesn’t like to take lore completely seriously, often laughing no matter what’s happening or teasing chat after something big goes down, but his character is solid with a lot of potential for future lore.

Foolish has only started on his character and its already super interesting. The hints at his dark past as a “god of death” and his current conflict with the egg are intriguing as fuck. Not to mention the MASSIVE builds he does for everyone, helping to progress their lore as well.

Fundy has a lot of freedom with his character to participate however much he wants in lore. While generally he’s a trickster who loves to prank people he has enough tragedy build into his backstory he’s able to break the viewer’s heart with a flip of a switch. Not to mention his recent, almost surreal, stream that explored his character’s disturbing dreams that may or may not predict the future.

Niki is very character driven, exploring her character's grief of losing her best friend and her anger of being ignored in the very country she helped create. She has incredibly emotional moments, and even though she’s on her own building an underground city she still participates in other lore via teaming with jack manifold or the syndicate.

Jack Manifold’s lore is VERY character focused, and while he’s described his story as a “B plot that occasionally intersects with the main plot”, the story he tells is still fascinating. Being pushed aside not taken seriously his whole life, his character develops into a fun cartoony-esque villain who begs to be taken seriously, that has the depth of a truly conflicted person who is torn between wanting revenge on everyone who’s done him wrong and just wanting a friend.

Last but not least, the man himself, Dream. The most fascinating thing about his lore is that absolutely none of it is from his pov. All we know about his character is only from what we see from everyone else’s povs, and in his case it leads to a very intimidating villain! Not to mention, mans owns the damn server and yet has made himself the main antagonist! He is the only character I consider a “true villain” on the smp. His voice acting and writing is downright sinister. I could write a fucking essay on how his character’s obsession with power has led him to the point he thinks himself an unstoppable god

Everyone on this server is stunning and I love all of them!!!!!

[otptings]

Countless Moons

-Idol; Niki

-Word Count; 3k+

-Genre; 13+, angst , two endings (one horror, one ambiguous fluff)

-Warnings; detailed death, blood, cussing, aged up Niki, mentions of eating disorder, descriptions of grief multiple breakdowns, mentions of vomiting, self harm, insanity

-Synopsis; 2 years ago you witnessed your boyfriends death firsthand. Now after his 2 year death anniversary weird occurrences have started happening.

-A/n - here is my warning, this has a really detailed death scene that caused me to become choked up while writing this. if you do not think you can handle that please do not read this. requests are open for Enhypen (super small print is a dream, italics are flashbacks)

"I'm sorry."

Tears dripped down your cheeks. Fat and warm as they landed on your hands that you were wringing. Staring at the gravestone in front of you.

Riki Nishimura.

December 9th 2005- November 30th 2020.

Gone too soon.

It was the second anniversary. That means two years. Two years since you've witnessed him get hit by a car. When you thought too long about it you could remember that day perfectly.

That dreaded day.

Seeing his purple hair and the pout on his face after he had gotten lectured by the soccer coach because of it. The sun beating down on you, warming you despite the cold breeze that threatened to force you to put on a jacket. Niki's jacket that he always left for you just in case. Watching as he dribbled the ball, confidence displayed on his face as he kicked it toward the goal. Tossing his arm over K's shoulder as he cheered, turning to face you. Raising his fist, a smile on your face as you happily cheered for him.

Tugging said jacket closer around your body as another cold breeze brushed by. The clouded sky only made the day more dismal. Knowing that not even the sun would shine on you, as if it knew what this day meant.

"I should've listened to you," You wiped away your tears releasing a shaky laugh, "If I was more careful you would never had have to run after me."

The gravel digging into your knees and palm. Hearing your jeans rip as you hit the ground. Turning around in time to see the car hitting Niki. You could hear crunches, and a thud as he hit the ground. A blood curling scream was heard, but you don't know if it was from you or Niki. The driver of the car veered into a tree, who you later found out was drunk, passing out against the wheel.

The horn blared as you ran over to Niki, placing his head in your lap. His purple hair appearing red faintly, his eyes fluttering shut. Begging him to stay awake, tears blurring your vision as you cupped his cheek . Eyes widening you say blood dripping from his forehead.

So much blood.

The crimson liquid spilling around his body, seeping into your clothes as you held him closely. Looking around you saw bystanders staring on in disbelief, watching as you cried over his body in the middle of the street.

By the time the ambulance showed up Niki had stopped breathing. More screams and tears leaving you as the paramedics pulled you off of his body. One of them wrapped a silver blanket around you, another called your parents. You watched as they attempted to revive Niki.

They weren't successful.

His time of death was 5:37 pm.

"I wish you were here with me. I still sleep with the teddy bear your mom gave me, the one that used to be yours." A bitter sweet memory, his mom coming to your house with tears in her eyes. Handing you a box of his belongs. She hugged you tightly, muttering a sorry, before giving you her number. That was 2 years ago, before they moved to Osaka.

You couldn't blame her.

The box was precious to you. Filled with various teddy bears that he had around his room, various assortment of clothes, and letters that he had written you.

Goosebumps erupted over your skin as you felt eyes on you. Was someone watching you? Raking your eyes over the tree line, you thought you saw a glimpse of purple. Chills ran through you. It was time to leave anyway, it was past 7 pm.

Placing the narcissus flower on his grave, you stood up not bothered by the grass stains on your jeans. Pulling the jacket closer to your body, you headed to the gateway of the graveyard.

As you approached the archway you felt an urge to turn around. It was strong, like someone whispering it directly in your ear. Glancing over your shoulder you saw someone crouching over his grave, exactly where you were mere moments ago. The flower you placed in the figures hand as they stood up. An involuntary gasp left your mouth, and then the figure was gone. Vanishing into thin air.

"Niki?"

-

The sun beamed down on him reflecting his silver hair as he stepped into the river. Niki turned to you with a giant smile on his face, his hand up covering his eyes from the son. Strangely you couldn't make out his eyes. You let out a laugh watching as the bottom of his jeans got soaked by the water where he hadn't pulled them high enough. He looked down at the flowing water, a pout on his lips.

The water seemed to continue rising, as fear shown in his eyes. Just like the day the car hit him. You tried to scream at him, tell him to get out of the water, but no words left your mouth. A wave rose out of the water and hit Niki. A gurgled noise filled the air as you ran to the river. You ran into the river, desperately looking for him when you something grab your leg and yank you under the water. You were met by dark red eyes, and a fanged smile.

He let out a laugh as the water filled your lungs. When your vision started to get blurry he whispered in your ear.

"Be back soon love."

-

No fucking way. Your stomach dropped as you read the text.

Niki Niki 💞

Hi baby

Your hand shook as you quickly blocked the number. This was a sick fucking joke. Nausea flooded your stomach, and you felt bile rise in your throat. Dropping to your knees you started to get choked up. Covering your mouth you tried to quiet the sobs leaving your mouth.

Who the fuck would hack a dead persons phone? Why would you think that was okay?

Seeing Niki's contact appear made your heart drop. Memories flashed through your mind.

His face lighting up after the goal, when he looked at you in the bleachers and knew that he wanted to make you proud. His smile shining brighter than the sun. Whining when he pulled you into his arms after, laughing as he rubbed his sweaty cheek against yours. His hair stuck to his forehead when he leaned down to you, placing a kiss on your cheek.

Hearing the sound of his body hitting the ground. Holding him tightly to your body, begging anybody to help you. Feeling his blood soaking through your jeans, sticking them to your skin like paper mache. Watching him open his mouth as he tried to talk to you. The panic in his eyes as his breathing got more ragged. A gurgling noise presenting itself as his lungs filled with blood. Seeing his eyes becoming glazed over as you held him to your chest, begging him to stay awake.

You should've held him tighter that day. Kissed him a little harder. Not bothered worrying about his sweaty jersey. Just cherished the time that you spent with him.

Unknown

this looks weird I know but please listen to me

meet me in the place where we first met

I need to see you love

-

Tears streamed down your face as you held your legs close to your chest. Your skirt was covered in mud and grass stains. The bottom of it was torn where it had snagged when you tried to run away from them. Quiet cries left your mouth as you hid under the bleachers, praying that the bullies would leave you alone. You covered your mouth as you heard them getting closer, chants of your names.

"Come out piglet."

"Yea piglet. You love to play in the mud right?"

"Come out come out piglet." Their laughter got quieter as they walked further away. You slowly relaxed. You just had to wait out here til the bell rung. Only flaw in your plan was that you had no clue what time it was.

"Are you okay?" You jumped pulling your legs closer as you heard someone. Turning to your right you saw a boy with dark brown hair, hanging shaggily over his eyes. He held out his hand, attempting to help you stand up. When he realized you weren't gonna grab it he sat down beside you, not caring about the mud getting on his clean uniform. "My names Niki. What's yours?"

Niki didn't seem bothered at your silence. Taking off his jacket he handed it to you.

"I see your uniforms dirty. You can wear my jacket for the day if you like." Reluctantly you took his jacket, slipping it over your arms as he watched you with a smile. You stared at him weirdly as the bell finally run. Recess was over and you had successfully escaped your bullies.

Standing up Niki held his hand out to you again. This time you took it.

"Thank you." His smile only grew larger.

"Of course. I think we're gonna be friends."

-

"This is fucking stupid." Your words got sucked into the quiet of the night. You knew the Niki was dead. You witnessed his death. Held him in your arms as he died and choked on his own blood. Even spoke a eulogy for his funeral. He was dead as doorknob.

Here you were though. Pacing back and forth underneath of the bleachers. Sneakers crunching the dry grass. It was the middle of December. Instead of studying I was waiting to see who hacked my dead boyfriend's phone.

And what specifically was I waiting for? To have them appear then force them to apologize? They have no morals if they could hack a dead teen's number. What makes me think that any useful would happen from this.

"Fuck!" You growled as you crouched down, tears burning at our eyes. "He's not fucking coming back." You tried to convince yourself. "Everyday was supposed to get easier without you, but they're only getting worst and worst." An uncontrollable wail left your lips. You grabbed your hair, pulling it as you tried to ground yourself.

Nothing made sense anymore. Niki died at 15. It's been 2 years and you're still holding on to him.

"He isn't coming back." You wiped your tears with the sleeve of the hoodie, sniffling as you stood up.

"Who's not coming back?" Whirling around your mouth went dry. A gasp left your mouth as dizziness overcame you. "Are you okay? You look pale."

Him screaming your name was the last thing that you heard before you fainted.

-

"How could you bring her here? She has no fucking clue?"

"And leave her there?"

"He's right this is the best choice."

"Bringing her here is dangerous for all of us. Especially here."

"If you guys even touch her I'll kill you."

"We would never."

"What if she finds out what you are?"

-

Your eyes flickered open at the sound of harsh whisperings. Sitting up slowly you looked around the room. It was a stereotypical boys room, posters on the wall and clothes scattered across the floor. Turning to the nightstand something caught your eye. Picking up the picture frame you saw it was a picture of you and Niki.

Freshman year homecoming. First dance since you started dating, almost 5 years after you met for the first time. Our parents forced us to take pictures, changing up our poses every couple of photos. This was ironically the most hated one from that day.

The sun was blazing, beaming down as your parents snapped photo after photo. His arms wrapped around your waist, chin resting on your shoulder. He whispered jokes into your ears, causing laughs to flow freely. Every picture was almost the same. Niki's lips close to your ear, a wide smile on your face as you laughed.

Tears started to blur your vision as you set the picture frame down, albeit with a little bit of a thunk. The whispers went quiet outside, obviously they all had heard it. Someone turned the doorknob with a click before pushing it open, peeking their head in. Light in the hallway shone behind them, obscuring their face. They closed the door quickly, the whispers starting back up.

What the fuck was happening? You pulled your knees to your chest, pulling the blanket tighter around your body. This had to be another nightmare. Yea. Just a silly little dream. Where my dead boyfriend rose from the dead, texted me, and then took me to some strange house. Of course totally normal dream behavior.

Suddenly someone quickly stepped into the room, closing the door behind them with a resolute thud. You threw your hand over your eyes, covering them from the harsh light that abruptly turned on. Blinking a few items, you looked at the person as your vision cleared.

"This is a sick dream." Tilting his head to the side Niki started to walk over to you. Throwing your hands up you stopped him in his tracks. "Stay the fuck away. You are not Niki. I saw him die." His face softened as he stood in the middle of the room, brown eyes showing sadness.

"I am Niki."

"You're fucking not! I saw him die! I held him as he fucking died!" He jumped at your screams, looking taken aback as tears streamed down your face.

"Love. Please let me explain."

"Don't fucking call me that! Only Niki can call me that!" With a sob you curled yourself into a ball. Praying for this nightmare to end. There is no way Niki is alive.

Thud. Warm blood. Gurgle.

Thud. Warm blood. Gurgle.

He was dead.

Dead.

Dead.

Dead.

Another guttural sob left your mouth, holding yourself tighter in hopes that you could just disappear. You flinched as you felt at the feeling of getting touched, a hand placing itself on back. He rubbed soothing circles as he whispered into your ear, words reassuring you that it was truly him.

"I'm sorry love." At the sound of that, overwhelming thoughts to go to sleep flooded your mind. You opened your eyes, confused at what was happening as you gripped onto Niki's shirt. An apologetic look on his face before everything went black for the second time that night.

-

"I know that you pity me. Some of you feel bad because of what I witnessed. The death of my best-friend, and boyfriend. But you shouldn't. I've known him 5 years but he has made the greatest impact on me. I look at everything in a positive light because of him. I work my hardest because he constantly encouraged me to. Niki was the best person that I know and I feel as if we should all live in his honor. I'm happy that he isn't suffering. I know that Niki is happy wherever he is. And if there is a Heaven he is definitely there. Niki if you can hear me I love you. I'm so grateful that I got to know you. I'll be with you again someday. The sun will shine on us again."

-

Niki Niki💞

I took the liberty of unblocking my number

when you wake up please text me

if you give me the chance I will explain everything

Love🦦

hurry

-

Here we were. Niki sitting on the opposite side of the bed from, just looking at you. Apart of you wished that this was real. That Niki was really in front of you. Drinking in his appearance you let a sigh leave your mouth.

Niki was in front of you.

His hair hung messily in his face, now grey instead of his signature purple at the time of his 'death'. Every other part of him looked normal. A hoodie hanging off of his skin frame, the same one that he wore for soccer practice with his jersey number on the back. He hasn't aged a day.

"I know you're confused," His voice broke the silence, seemingly the only thing that has changed. Having heard it multiple times you hadn't realized that it had gotten deeper, "please just let me explain. If you want nothing to do with me afterwards I'll let you go. I just missed you."

He ran his fingers through hair, before pulling the hoodie over his head. A nervous trait of his. It's nice to see that some things never change.

"I died. I remember the fear that I had that day, how you held me tightly in your arms, choking on my own blood. I remember all of it, and I truly did die." You stared at him, more confusion after part of his explanation than you had before.

"I was scared when I woke up here. I had all of the memories of my death, but woke up with no scars. No physical sign of the accident. Heeseung was the one that comforted me. He told me that I was chosen. Talked about fate's arrows and connecting two worlds. My memory of the speech is hazy after two years." Scooting closer to you he grabbed one of your hands, intertwining your fingers.

"You've been here this whole time?" Regret shone in his eyes as he nodded, "Why didn't you tell me?" His face dropped at your voice. Desperation was clear in the way that your voice cracked.

"I couldn't. They told me I would put in danger. That you would reject what I am now."

Niki cupped your cheek wiping your stray tears. Sighing you nuzzled your face into his palm. His hand was cold. The same coldness that filled you for years after his death.

"I missed you so much. I fought myself day and night. I needed you too. I'm sorry love."

All the nights filled with tears, sobbing until your throat was sore and your head felt like it would explode from the pressure. School days filled with people staring, whispering to each other about the poor girl that witnessed her boyfriends death. Bile rising in your throat every time you ate, thoughts of Niki bleeding out in your arms, remembering scrubbing the blood off of you in the shower. You never could keep food down, rushing to the bathroom after every meal. Tears flooding your eyes as you gagged, constant flashbacks.

But Niki is here. In front of you. His hand cupping your cheek, whispering apologies into the air between you. Maybe everything would be okay.

-

It's been two years. Two years since you've found out that Niki was still alive. As a vampire, but 'alive' nonetheless.

Leaving town was always your plan. After Niki's death what was left for you in Okayama? You always thought about going to South Korea, or maybe even to America. Somewhere to get a full fresh start. Not being known as the dead boy's girlfriend. Who wasted away due to grief. Who died 3 years after his death, a brutal suicide that raked the town.

You were the real Romeo and Juliet. Two young lovers separated at 15, death forcing them to part. You never recovered from his death, so at 18 you followed him. After your funeral your family left town, not being able to bare the pain.

It was a fresh start for you. And Niki.

Your love Niki. Who laid now on your chest as you watched a movie, a cult classic funnily enough. The other members spread out on various couches. Looking down at Niki you ran your fingers through his hair, a sigh leaving his mouth as he relaxed. Grabbing your other hand Niki placed a kiss on it, a smile blossoming across your lips.

In the dead of winter, under countless moons you were together again.

-

thank you for reading this, I really hoped that you enjoyed it. I tried to make it the ending as fluffy as possible without ruining the vibe I had going for the whole oneshot. underneath of this is the alternate ending if you want to go insane read it. it does contain mentions of insanity, and self harm. you have been warned

-

It's been two years. Two years since you've found out that Niki was still alive. As a vampire, but 'alive' nonetheless.

Leaving town was always your plan. After Niki's death what was left for you in Okayama? You always thought about going to South Korea, or maybe even to America. Somewhere to get a full fresh start. Not being known as the dead boy's girlfriend. Who wasted away due to grief. Who died 3 years after his death, a brutal suicide that raked the town.

You were the real Romeo and Juliet. Two young lovers separated at 15, death forcing them to part. You never recovered from his death, so at 18 you followed him. After your funeral your family left town, not being able to bear the pain.

That’s what your parents told everyone at least.

The truth is police found you under the bleachers, writhing on the ground as you nonsensically spouted about vampires and curses. Telling everyone who listened how Niki was still alive. They would tut, turning around while mentioning how the accident affected you. Ruining you mentally. Your parents' concerns only grew when you would speak to the thin air. Claiming it was Niki. That he missed them, and wished they would allow him in the house.

You would claw at yourself to ‘feed’ Niki, blood dripping from your arms. It came to a halt when your parents walked into the house, crimson surrounding your mouth as you happily told them you had turned. You were now a vampire. You could now be with Niki forever.

They shipped you to the farthest asylum. One in Virginia, hidden away in the mountains. Far are from them. Far away from Niki.

Maybe after countless moons you’ll meet again one day. When the insanity no longer claimed your mind, and shrouded your reality.

[kozozaki]

The Blame - Ranboo x Reader Chapter 3

Y/n ended up falling asleep at Tommy's house from a combination of stress and just plain tiredness. She yawned quietly and started climbing the ladder, walking towards L'manburg. She got to the top of the staircase before stopping abruptly. 

"What the hell?!" She ran towards the now walled-in country, running her hand against the rocky obsidian. She could hear the angry and confused voices of Tubbo and Big Q on the other side. "Guys?" Y/n yelled to get their attention.

"Y/n?" Tubbo said from behind the wall

“Tubbo, what is this wall? Why is this here?”

“That’s exactly what I want to know!”

Y/n dug a small hole in the wall. “I haven’t seen you in a while so I came to L’manburg, but this isn’t what I was expecting…” she looked through the window of the camarvan to see Quackity yelling at Tommy. Her eyes narrowed, she knew why the walls were there, and she knew who put the walls up too.

“Y/n, let’s get inside the van, Fundy will be here soon,” Tubbo said. She nodded but didn’t go into the van yet.

“Y/n, do you know what happened to my house?” George was there. She froze.

“Something happened to your house?” She played dumb.

“Yeah, it was burnt and robbed. Dream said it was Tommy.” Of course Dream said it was Tommy. He wasn’t wrong per-se, but Dream was always out to get Tommy in one way or another, and it pissed Y/n off.

“Is that why there are walls around L’manburg?” George nodded. She looked at the town center, more specifically Ranboo. He didn't have his sunglasses on. His eyes were heterochromatic, one green, and one red. They looked really pretty. 

Ranboo gave Y/n a worried look, basically asking if she was okay. She nodded and waved. He waved back, still looking concerned. Tommy, Quackity, Tubbo, and Fundy exited the camarvan. “Let’s go speak to Dream,” Tubbo suggested. No one answered, but everyone followed.

“What are you doing here, Y/n?” Tommy asked.

“Tommy, I can’t go one day without waking up and being pissed at my brother,” she admitted. They were far enough behind the others now that they wouldn’t hear, “Tommy, they have no idea Ranboo and I were involved, they’ve tunnel-visioned on you. I would take the blame from you, but they wouldn’t care, they would just punish us both. If Ranboo gets blamed, I’m gonna take the heat for him.”

“But Y/n-”

“No, Tommy, I’m gonna take the criticism for him, and that’s final, no objections. His life is probably worth 3 times as much as mine, so it’ll be more beneficial.”

“I won’t argue with you, but I will argue that your life is equal to or higher than everyone’s, at least agree to that,” Tommy hated when she put herself down like that.

“I would be lying if I said I agree with you,” she said in a monotone voice.

“Tch. Look, it’s the green bastard.”

“Dream. Why did you build these walls around L’manburg?” Tubbo asked. Ghostbur was saying the other day how everyone seemed to prefer him dead than alive, but if Y/n were being honest, even in Wilbur’s slightly psychotic state, she would have preferred him as the president.

“Just as an incentive,” Dream looked at Y/n. She longed to rip that patronizing smile off his face. He knew she helped, but he was waiting to see if she would throw herself under the bus to save Ranboo. He knew her more than she knew herself, “If Tommy doesn’t get punished for griefing George’s house soon, the walls will expand.”

Tubbo thought it over for a moment, “Let’s go to the courthouse.”

Once the group arrived, Tommy was put in a holding cell. Quackity was speaking to him. Y/n was sat next to Ranboo, they were both on edge. “Tommy, I’m on your side, but I have to be unbiased as possible. George, if you would like to explain what happened.”

“I’m just walking around the SMP and was told by someone who asked to remain anonymous that my home was burnt down, and I thought they were joking. So I asked them who did it, and the names I was given were Tommy, but there were two more. Y/n and Ranboo.” A series of gasps rang throughout the other members in the courthouse. Y/n immediately looked to the ground. She couldn’t defend Ranboo if they were both being sussed.

“Ranboo, Y/n, I’m gonna have to ask you to step into this cell here,” Tubbo ushered the two into the compact cell.

Y/n looked down at the lava. She whispered, “Anonymous my ass, it’s obviously Dream.”

“It probably is, but they aren’t completely sure we did it. As much as I hate saying it, they already know Tommy did it, nothing is gonna change their minds. We have to stay as innocent-looking as we can,” he definitely wasn’t lying, the two needed to stay as indifferent as they could.

“Tubbo please, listen to me, I have 4 witnesses, Captain Puffy, Nihachu, Ranboo, and Y/n, I was with them last night. Isn’t that right, Niki?” This idiot, it doesn’t help when two of his witnesses are prime suspects.

“I didn’t see Y/n,” Niki says. She was right, Y/n wasn’t there, but for reasons unrelated to the robbing.

“I, I felt really nauseous, so I was at Tommy’s house while Ranboo and him were helping you guys.”

“Right, Ranboo, shed some light on the situation please.” Tubbo’s monotone voice was intimidating Y/n a bit, he had always been the more cheery person in every group.

“Okay, umm, just be aware that I do have extremely bad short term memory loss.” Several people started talking at once but Y/n could only make out what Tubbo was saying.

“Okay, right, Tommy, the fact that he is struggling to remember is making your situation worse.” Fundy looked at Tubbo for approval to flick a lever, Y/n and Ranboo watched in horror as he pulled it down. “Tommy you have two strikes left, I need to hear your side and I need you to not yell.”

“It was the perfect crime.”

“Tommy!” Y/n yelled, surging forward slightly. Ranboo placed a hand on her shoulder, and she instantly relaxed, walking to the corner of the box-shaped room, sliding down the wall and resting her arms on her knees while Ranboo sat down carefully next to her. She was shocked, she didn’t think he would admit to it.

Fundy started recording everything Tommy said after that. “But hear me out Tubbo, he’s being biased against me, and Dream retaliating by building huge obsidian walls is absurd.”

“Tommy I have been advised to banish you,” Fundy flicked yet another lever, “But that is a very extreme measure and I hope it doesn’t have to come to that. So you’ll be put on probation. George, Tommy will be stripped of his power, and everything he does he will have to report directly to Fundy. Tommy as of now you are on probation, for the next two weeks.”

“Tubbo, this is insane!”

“It may be insane but I’m hoping this is conclusion is satisfying enough to get the walls tore down.”

“Well why are the walls even there in the first place? He can’t just build walls because I, me and- by myself I did a little prank,” Y/n looked up, her eyes strained. She turned to Ranboo relieved, Tommy didn’t slip up, he nearly did though. Ranboo must’ve put his sunglasses back on while she wasn’t looking.

“George is the king of the SMP, Tommy, this is considered treason,” Tubbo looked at Fundy and he nodded. Fundy put his hand on the last lever and pulled.

“Tommy!” Y/n yelled again, this time from anxiety. She knew very well what was under that glass, and so did Fundy, “Fundy why would you do that?!”

“Just felt like it.” he said in a snarky tone.

“How is he alive?” George asked. All Y/n saw was Quackity fall into the pit with Tommy and she couldn’t help but laugh.

“Y/n don’t fucking laugh at me!”

“I’m sorry, Big Q, from where I am right now, it was hilarious,” she looked over to see Ranboo laughing, his laugh sounded really nice. 

Quackity exited the box and Tommy followed, leaving the courthouse yelling, “Fuck you!”

“Mr. President, what are we do with Ranboo and Y/n?” Karl said.

Tommy came back immediately to say “No, no, listen, listen Tubbo, they weren’t there it was just me.”

“Those two weren’t there?”

“It was just me.”

Y/n and Ranboo were let out of the cell. Y/n let out a sign of gratitude, people were mistaken when they said Tommy was egotistical.

While walking back to L’manburg Tommy and Tubbo were arguing, and it broke Y/n’s heart, they were the best of friends before Tubbo became president. Maybe Techno was right, the government does corrupt. A cabient meeting was called in the middle of the walk to L’manburg. Tubbo called her over and she separated from Ranboo and Niki and joined Tommy, Tubbo, Quackity, and Fundy.

Y/n spaced out, staring at the ground until Dream showed up. “Tubbo. Probation isn’t enough.”

“Dream I know you suggested exile but-”

“That’s not enough! Tommy is Tommy, he’s never gonna stop, his goal is to piss me off, and if you want that, as somebody in your nation, even if he doesn’t have power, there aren’t that many members of L’manberg. And it’s fine, you guys wanna think about it, it’s fine. We can arrange a meeting to talk about what to do with him. Set a time, set a day, I’ll come.”

“Okay, how about the second, the second of December?”

Everyone agrees but Y/n stays silent. “Y/n?” Quackity asks.

“I’m sorry, being around my Dream is screwing with my head, I need to go.” Dream grabbed her wrist.

“Y/n, please.”

“No! I’m not gonna stay around to just to hear you manipulate Tubbo into doing what you want and me not being able to do anything, as per usual!”

She walked back to where Ranboo was, he immediately put a comforting hand on her shoulder. He glared at Dream, glad he was wearing glasses. “What happened Y/n?”

“My brother is extremely manipulative, just being around him confuses me. I can never tell if he agrees with me or is on my side or not. TLDR; Dream’s a piece of shit.”

Ranboo hummed in agreement. “You should probably go home, it’s getting dark, and you shouldn’t be around all this government stuff, you’ll get too stressed. Would you mind if I visited you tomorrow?”

“I’d like some company. It’s pretty lonely out there, Tubbo doesn’t come around often, he’ll probably show up even less with all this political bullshit.” He was slightly startled by the girls aggressiveness, but it was justified, and wasn’t directed towards him.

He walked her to the nether portal where they said their goodbyes.

“See you tomorrow, loser,” she joked. Ranboo gasped dramatically, “Yeah, you heard right, loser.”

“You’re mean.”

“No no no, I’m sorry Ranboo it was joke!” She engulfed him in a hug. He was surprised, they had become kind of close but he was scared to assume she was comfortable with hugs. But when she did it, he was relieved.

“Bye, shorty,” He patted her on the head. She gave him the middle finger and stepped into the nether.

“Later, giraffe.”

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Lmao I’m sorry for anyone who is over 5’5 I’m just salty I’m only 5’2