#speak for yourself aac

[dakotac0le]

No but unfortunalty i do think ricky potts is very good rep of being disabled and being nonverbal / mute beacuse literlly the core theme of his charcter is jsut. Lonlieness and isolation and creating fantasies in your head where you are *important* and *valued* and also importantly . Not disabled and not nonverbal. And living there instead. And also his fantasies are quite explicity sexual in a very teenageresque way. WICH IS WILD FOR A NONVERBAL DISABLED CHARCTER . hes a fully rounded guy (tm) in the way 90% of mute charcters very much are not.

but whyd they make him speaking yall.

[primrosebitch]

This is so true, I'm physically disabled with many chronic illnesses and I also have adhd and suspect I'm autistic, and this is also true for physical disabilities

As an example way back when i first developed my chronic illnesses and all that I'd say I had low support needs for my physical disability, but I still had support needs. I was exempt from pe, allowed to use the elevator, if there was something that required a lot of walking I was accommodated so that I didn't have to walk as much, I let/had others carry heavy stuff for me because I wasn't able to without lots of pain, when I hung out with friends we made sure it didn't include anything that I wasn't able to do, and there are probably tons of other small things I don't remember or that have become so needed for me that I forget it's not universal.

And looking at that list it seems like a lot, but it really isn't, because I'm not basing what level of support I need on able bodied people, I'm basing it off of other disabled people.

Nowadays I'd say I have mid level support needs for my physical disabilities, I need to use a walker if I'm doing any large (for me) amount of walking (the amount is basically nothing for able bodied people lol), I'm not in school anymore but for reference (and because it's the easiest way to explain) if I was I would only be able to go like 2 or 3 days a week, I would be using my walker, I would be given more time on tests and assignments because of my brain fog, I would be given more travel time between classes, I would be allowed to type instead of hand write because hand writing makes my hands hurt and cramp up a lot, I would be allowed to just go and take a nap if I got tired because I have so much fatigue and I need to take naps to function, I would get extra breaks because if I don't my brain just stops working and I can't do any work, and I also still need all of the accommodations I needed before and there are almost certainly more that I can't remember right now.

Like look at how much more I need now, and I still consider my support needs mid because I'm comparing what I need to what other physically disabled people need and some people are unable to wash themselves or feed themselves (specifically the put food in mouth, chew, and swallow part) or they can't physically leave the house or even their bed, like how can I have high support needs when I am able to do all of that, like sure showering is super tiring but I can still shower, I can still feed myself, I can still go out and do stuff and I might be tired afterwards but I still left the house.

I think what low support needs people get wrong when they feel invalidated by the terms low support needs vs high support needs is that they think "low support needs" implies "insignificant support needs/no support needs". But that's not what it means. Every disabled person has support needs. Just because they are on the low end compared to certain other disabled people's, that does not imply that they aren't real and valid. Someone else needing more support than you doesn't imply that your disability isn't a real disability

[clownrecess]

(Tw for a VERY brief mention of infantilization)

I want to talk about interacting with AAC users in person, specifically for speaking people.

1. Being an AAC user, I get left behind during conversations a lot because it takes me longer to add in my statement. By the time I'm done, the topic has oftentimes changed and then what I want to say isnt relevant anymore, and sometimes wont even be understood because to everyone else what I just said was out of place and random. This feels really frustrating and sometimes isolating, as well as embarrassing. Please wait for us, we want to converse too.

2. Sometimes when I am not yet done responding, people will watch me and try to guess what I'm going to say. If all I've got down so far is "I already", people might go "I already.. know!" "I already.. saw!" etc. Please stop doing that. Even if you got the idea correct, you might use the wrong words, which frustrates me. And even if you say it all correctly it's still frustrating, imagine if someone tried to guess what you were saying by interrupting you every time you started to talk. It's annoying.

3. Dont comment on what in our folders. If I open a folder to get to another word, and whilst doing that you see a different word in it that's funny or inappropriate or whatever, keep it to yourself. Its annoying. You have acsess to those words, and it isnt treated as weird, so why is it for me?

4. Don't infantilize us. We aren't perpetually children. We are our age. Treat us as if we are a speaking person of our age.

[magz]

This one of many way to help disabled people. Can "donate" voice through Vocal ID so that those not able reliably speak can have more variety Text-To-Speech voice in their AAC devices (Alternative Augmentative Communication). Can also "donate" to preserve own voice for future.

Recording can take 2 to 3 hours total, which can be done bit at a time. If done outside a voice donation clinic or recording booth - what needed is a headset with microphone, a quiet environment, and google chrome.

Can make Voice Contributor account or if want to make voice charity drive so more people donate voice, can visit VoiceDrive Ambassador page for more info how to do it.

Quote:

Rapel Patel speech scientist and founder of VocaliD says, “Millions of people rely on synthetic speech to communicate everyday. Yet, they���re given a limited set of generic, robotic sounding voices. Voices that don’t fit their body or personality.” Voices are a part of our identity. If you never met me but spoke to me on the phone, in just a few words you would likely deduce that I am a young woman from New York. Our voice showcases our age group, region we come from, our physical size, our gender identity etc. and our vocal output expresses our emotion, thoughts and ideas. If you donate your voice, vocaliD can mix your vocal recordings with the vocal recordings of an AAC user to create a custom voice for the AAC user.

Of other side, instead of donating...

For using Vocal ID for yourself, there are two main options.

"Vocal ID Legacy" where you preserve the voice for yourself - which end up cost $1499 u.s. dollars (if insurance not cover it).

And "Bespoke Voice" where you choose a voice from recordings, with option to 'blend' the voice with your own if still have some ability to - with varied cost.

[zebulontheplanet]

Um, I take back what I said. Speak for yourself is honestly one of the best apps I’ve tried so far and the motor planning aspect of it works so well for me. Do I need to customize it a lot? Yeah. But I don’t really mind that to be honest. It’s a really good app and after only three days of using it I’m picking it up really fast and becoming fluent in it.

This is the first symbol based AAC that I’ve actually felt confident using and becoming fluent in. It’s really a shame that it’s $300. I’d buy it in a heartbeat.

I’ve been trying out speak for yourself free trial lately and it’s ok. The vocabulary doesn’t really make sense in my head.

I really wish I had lamp though, it looks like it makes a lot of sense and looks amazing. If only though lol. Maybe one day!

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

US government (<essentially) requesting public comments on conditions that co-occur (happen together) with autism.

specifically, 7 questions, ask about physical & mental health & other (learning & communication & intellectual & developmental disorders) conditions, what more research need, how services for these can be better, how COVID infection & world changes from COVID impact (good/bad). each question can say 1500 words.

open january 3, 2024 to february 14, 2024.

all response be part of public record - so please do not say thing not comfortable with government or other people like researchers see, not say anything confidential or personally identifiable.

.

now.

although this apply to all autism in US, not just high support / etc., but:

to higher support needs & levels 2/3 & semi- & nonverbal nonspeaking & severely autistics, their caregivers, & allies, of united states

(to higher support needs & higher levels & semi- & nonverbal nonspeaking autistics, their caregivers, & allies, of united states)

ask for public comments like this, inherent more inaccessible to autistics with high support needs & level 2/3 & w more severity, whatever language we feel most comfortable with. this called research sampling bias.

independent & many times even with support… not all of us can / know how to use internet, or know internet exist. not all of us can read complex government language. not all of us have functional communication to able respond. not all us have writing easily be understood. for those who can any/all of this, often very difficult.

so what happen is many us we need caregivers & other people respond with us for us. not all of us have caregivers or caregivers who can. not all of us know this call to response exist. and. our voice get drowned out because governmental people don’t realize this research sampling bias, don’t realize the method they do survey inherent leave out some of most marginalized autistics. so they going take results from lower support & level 1 n maybe 2 autistics, then think it speak for all autistics. (kind of already able see this, how they forget mention genetic & chromosomal conditions, like rett williams down syndrome, which more likely affect higher support & more severe & level 3 autistics)

we need have our voice represented in response, as much as possible. and. we need make sure they know about this research sampling bias.

so, am directly calling those of us who can. to fill out. those who caregiver, to fill out with us for us. but also those ally: to not forget about us when fill out.

higher support needs & level 2/3 & semi- & nonverbal autistics & with more severe autism in US:

if you can, fill out with your experiences in most authentic way possible & most comfortable. include with AAC, with “grammatically incorrect” sentences, with short sentences, etc.

or, show caregiver or someone trust, to fill out with you for you.

remember what you say can be seen by government people & researcher & others for long time, so make sure don’t say anything that can make people know it’s you & don’t say thing don’t want other people know. but do know your name won’t be tied to this.

spread word & tell caregiver & friends to spread word too

caregivers to us in US:

help us fill this out - with us for us. your experience your joy your labor is part of autism experience, but also remember this is about us. please balance two & give us dignity & autonomy.

remember this become part of public record. so again don’t say personally identifiable things & confidential things. think about what we would not want other people know.

spread word!

allies to us in US:

if you autistic yourself, of course fill out with your experiences, but also:

when fill out, please do remember explicitly say and emphasize how this inherent inaccessible to us, that you won’t hear from many of us because we can’t, that whatever result will skew to those lower support & more independent & level 1 n maybe 2.

(it not say you have be autistic to fill this out, it call for public response after all, but if you not autistic & not closely associate with autism like family like research like service provider, do think about what you say & why you say)

spread word :D especially about part about high support needs / etc

those not in US:

sorry😢but do spread word if can/want

.

do NOT argue about severity & functioning labels & levels & support needs language on this. use these because know people use them call themselves - respect them. if you don’t call self that or not even target of these language am not talking about you.

.

all 7 questions under cut, can also see them on website

1. What are the most significant challenges caused by co-occurring physical health conditions in autistic people? (Examples of co-occurring physical health conditions: gastrointestinal disorders, sleep disturbances, epilepsy, sensory and motor challenges)

2. What are the most significant challenges caused by co-occurring mental health conditions in autistic people? (Examples of mental health co-occurring conditions: depression, anxiety, aggressive or self-injurious behavior, suicidality)

3. What are the most significant challenges caused by other conditions that co-occur with autism, such as learning disabilities, developmental disabilities, intellectual disabilities, and communication disabilities?

4. What additional research is needed to help address co-occurring conditions for autistic people?

5. What could be improved in autism services and supports to help address co-occurring conditions for autistic people? (Examples: Equitable access to and accessibility of services, insurance coverage, service systems issues, patient-provider interactions)

6. What lasting impact has COVID–19 infection and illness had on co-occurring physical and/or mental health conditions for autistic people?

7. What lasting positive or negative impacts have societal changes due to the COVID–19 pandemic had on physical or mental health for autistic people? (Examples of societal changes: disruptions in services, increased remote work and school, increased use of telehealth, reduced in-person social interactions and obligations)

[howtocareforbunnyboys]

Communicating with smalls who can't speak right now

To clarify: this post is written for carers of age regressors who experience temporary loss of speech from time to time. My small one sometimes regresses too small to speak, and when he's big, overstimulation can also cause a verbal shutdown.

This post is written by an autistic person with autistic friends, family, and an autistic partner, but it is not about nonverbal autistic people. I'm not nonverbal, and neither are any of my close friends or family members, so I lack the adequate experience to know how to accommodate someone who does not process words the same way as someone who can verbalize.

Outline:

What to ask? (Help for how to proceed, written with non-autistic carers in mind)

Leeloo AAC app (method)

Option chart (method)

Sign language (method)

Understanding sensory management

🌷 🪻 🌻 🪻 🌷

What to ask: (Autistic triage, lol)

If your small one is overstimulated, then the first step is to determine what is causing irritation.

"Are you overstimulated?" Can work for older kids, but "is everything too much?" May work better for younger regressors. Similarly, "is everything too quiet?" Is a great way to ask if they're understimulated.

"Do you know what the problem is?" Opens the door for them to point to the problem, cover their eyes/ears, or tug on their clothes.

If they answer no, start removing stimuli and asking if it's better. E.g., dim the light and ask "is it better with the light low?" If they indicate yes, repeat question 1. If they indicate no, ask if they want the light back up.

If there's still a problem and it's not external, it's probably an internal stimulus. They may be hungry, thirsty, or need to use the restroom. They may need to switch positions, stretch their limbs, or treat a minor injury. They may feel nauseated, have dry eyes, or need a shower. Interoception can be really hard for autistic people, and any of these stimuli can register as just pain, distress, discomfort, or overstimulation, without a clear source.

I know the options for possible sources for overstimulation is seemingly endless, and being asked questions can itself be overstimulating. You can reduce this problem by identifying for yourself the most likely triggers. For example, if your small just had a meal 20 minutes ago, then hunger probably isn't the culprit. If the noise level in the room (and coming in from the doors and windows) is already low, that's probably not the main problem.

You can also ask some questions silently, by offering them helpful objects (noise-canceling headphones, fidget toys, their phone, blankets, plushies, beverages, etc.)

Lastly, it's important to know that when overstimulation leads to a shutdown or meltdown, it's rarely due to one cause. It's because there's just too much going on all at once. It's not "the light is too bright," it's "the light is too bright, my clothes are uncomfortable, there is a small beeping noise, I'm getting a headache, and I'm carrying stress from events that happened earlier today."

Because it's a cumulative effect, removing some of the irritants (and adding soothing stimuli) can be enough to start to return the person to baseline.

As they approach baseline, they'll be able to think better, and may start to be able to identify problems on their own. For example, when the sharpest lights and noises are blocked and their body is at the right temperature, they may be able to identify "oh, I'm thirsty!" and request a beverage (with gestures, writing, typing, etc).

As they approach baseline, they may be able to verbalize again, or they may still need a break from speaking. The process of your body moving from a high-stress state to a low-stress state takes time. Your body has to filter out all those stress hormones, and build back up the feel-good hormones.

It can be that nothing is actively wrong anymore at that exact moment, but they need some quiet time with their favorite media to rest and recover.

🌷 🪻 🌻 🪻 🌷

Leeloo AAC

If they can still type, the app Leeloo is a free, albeit limited, AAC program.

[Link to Leeloo AAC via Google Play]

Pros:

Mostly free

Can read aloud what you type (TTS)

Has pre-programmed words with pictures in some categories

Cute aesthetic geared towards children

Cons:

Can't add your own words and pictures

Some categories are behind a paywall

Can't record your own pronunciations

For regressors who are old enough to type, this is a great resource.

For regressors who are younger, the limited number of programmed images & words may be a problem.

🌷 🪻 🌻 🪻 🌷

Option chart

The above image shows two ways to show your small options, which they can select through pointing or placing their hand on top of the desired option.

Above the orange line is for yes/no questions. I find that when Bunny is too overstimulated to speak, his needs are often too complex to put into a simple nod or head shake, so an "other" option is essential.

Placing "other" in the center also allows him to point between two options to indicate "yes, but I need accommodations" or "this is similar to what I need, but not quite".

Below the orange line are 3 symbols 🤎🏵⭐️. The specific symbols used don't really matter; I just drew a heart, a flower, and a star because they're simple shapes every kid has seen a thousand times, so it's not difficult visual stimuli for the small one to process.

While you draw the symbols, you explain to them what the options are. After the first question, you can either turn the page to make new symbols, or you can reset the meaning of the same symbols.

If the regressor struggles with resetting the meaning, but you don't want to draw a new set every time, then try just drawing 2-3 sets and switching sets between questions.

You can also place 3 toys in front of the regressor for them to grasp, if they don't respond as well to requests for pointing. This method is excellent for very, very young regressors that struggle to read.

Accommodations for blind / visually impaired regressors :

You can still use the option chart method, of course. You can guide their hand to 3 different, familiar objects, or verbally inform them what you're placing in front of them. It's important that the objects are very different, so they can find and pick up (for example) the cold, metallic spoon, or soft plushie, or smooth stone without confusion.

If you have permission to touch their body, you can assign meaning to different body parts, e.g. right shoulder for yes, left shoulder for no, knee for "maybe/kinda", top of head for "I don't know".

I specify "if you have permission to touch" because verbally indicating body parts will involve the possible factor of right/left confusion. A regressed person may temporarily lose the ability to tell right from left, but if you touch each shoulder, they're likely to be able to remember which shoulder means "yes" and which means "no".

🌷 🪻 🌻 🪻 🌷

Sign Language

I don't think I need to explain this one.

Pros:

Gain the ability to communicate better with more people in your local Deaf community

Gain the ability to communicate with noise-canceling headphones on, thereby reducing your level of auditory stimulation 🎧

Can listen to music and talk at the same time 🎶

Can talk in libraries 📚

Can talk in loud places like buses and trains without wanting to fly out of your skin. 🚌 🚂

Gain the security of knowing that as you age, if you start to lose your hearing, you'll still be able to communicate. 👵🧓👴

Cons:

For many reasons, it's best to learn directly from a Deaf teacher, and that costs money. If you have $10 USD spare per week and access to reliable transportation, you can probably join a beginner class held by your local Deaf resource center without any issues, but not everyone has those things. There are also courses held online, but please try to find one that teaches your regional sign language. (Learning ASL with a San Francisco accent when you live in NYC is perhaps a bit odd, but not as bad as learning sign language from a whole different country.)

It takes a lot of time to learn another language, so you'll still need a different method in the meantime.

🌷 🪻 🌻 🪻 🌷

Understanding sensory management

This is probably obvious, but when you're autistic, a great deal of effort goes into curating your sensory input. Speaking as a city-dweller, we live in a loud, stinky, bright, ugly, stressful, uncomfortable world, and we can't change that.

Arranging your schedule/routine to include regular bursts of comfort and happiness, and reducing irritants where possible, is necessary self-care for an autistic person. Disruption to these processes is distressing because we really rely on these skills to manage the uncomfortable world.

[Example] : "I always watch ____ and eat ____ on my lunch break." = Going out to lunch with a friendly coworker will mean giving up my restful time, adding a whole lot of unanticipated stressors, and require conversation during a vital time I use for quiet relaxation. This is how I get through my work day.

[Example] : "I only eat this brand of [food item] and wear [specific clothing type/brand/fabric]. I am upset if this is unavailable." = I know what feels good in my mouth and tastes good, and I know what feels good on my body. Eating/drinking these things gives me a reliable burst of comfort and happiness. Wearing these things gives me a steady stream of reliable comfort/happiness throughout the day.

You can probably think of a point in your life when you were going through a difficult, emotional time, and you were taking things day by day, hour by hour. You got through work 15 minutes at a time, counting down til your next break. You spent your break doing something comforting. Maybe you avoided watching the news and avoided stressful family members.

You probably felt more irritable than usual when the grocery store radio plays a song you dislike, or your shopping cart has a squeaky wheel, or your watchband keeps catching on your arm hair, or the cashier looks like they're judging the nutritional content of your purchases and is considering making a bad joke. Normally, you'd filter out these mundane annoyances, but now they set your teeth on edge.

Maybe there was only one thing you looked forward to each day, like a little oasis. And if something went wrong with that precious thing, then everything you've been trying to keep inside would come spilling out in jagged breaths and hot tears spilling down your red, embarrassed face.

Recalling all this, you might notice that during those difficult, emotional times, non-autistic people use the same skills as we do --- limit stressors, and increase opportunities for comfort and happiness.

You do this naturally for others, already!

When your loved one is in mourning, what do you do for them? You limit stressors (clean their house, do their laundry, run errands for them, etc). You increase their comfort and happiness (give them gifts, make them their favorite foods, take them out to see their favorite sports team/movie franchise, etc).

Why does grieving require similar skills to daily life with autism, even though being autistic can be a joyful experience?

Autistic brains interpret sensory information differently than allistic (non-autistic) brains. We struggle to filter out unimportant stimuli, and we notice fine details, which means there is a LOT of stimuli. We just experience a "louder" external world than allistic people do.

When allistic people are in a heightened emotional state, they temporarily lose the capacity to filter out stimuli. This means that, for a time, they're experiencing a very loud internal world (from the heightened emotion) and a louder than usual external world all at the same time.

So when your autistic loved one freaks out about something you interpret as unimportant, please keep in mind that whatever it is, it's something that is important to them. It's something they were relying on, and looking forward to. The world is so, so loud. We need our reliable comfort and happiness. We need our rest and relaxation, (even if that rest and relaxation is achieved via jumping, spinning, dancing, singing, or making specific noises).

Thanks for reading :). I hope this gave you (and your small) something to discuss or try.

[positivelyqueer]

Language, understanding and use of, very complicated and multifaceted. Some people know complicated words and jargon, struggle with sentence structure and grammar. Some people few spoken vocabulary words, abundant AAC language. Some people speak very fluently, struggle with writing and reading. Some people limited words and memory, new words have to replace old words. Some people can communicate on par with others but it takes more effort or concentration. Some people variable language understanding and use. Some people no language at all, only pictures and ideas. All good and important. Not all people have language skills as you expect them. Be kind to yourself :)

[birdofmay]

Very often I realise that most people think functional communication equals the ability to self advocate.

My parents always focused on improving my communication abilities, they wanted me to develop functional communication, or at least something that's close to it. And when they realised that I understood written words and actually enjoyed reading, they focused on improving that skill, and on me communicating with written words. First it was pictures and printed out single words, then words I could arrange to three word sentences, and then longer sentences, and at some point I got my AAC device. And then later my typing really improved, which was when I changed to typing only and text-to-speech.

As a result I now can express myself very well in written sentences, but that doesn't mean that I can automatically and always advocate for myself. The sentences you're reading don't necessarily reflect what I actually want to express because to me language is one big jigsaw puzzle. I put sentence fragments together that fit, but while the overall meaning might be covered, a lot of what I have in mind still is lost. There are many things that still are "untranslatable", that can't be put into words.

Plus, I can only advocate for myself when I understand what's going on, when I know that I like or don't like something, when I'm aware of what I'm thinking and feeling, when I know HOW to successfully put those things into words and, especially, when I actually have the energy to write longer paragraphs. Because for writing longer paragraphs, I first have to structure my thoughts, and plan everything, and the latter is something I'm very weak at. Often I write longer paragraphs and as a result have a terrible headache.

When I write longer paragraphs on Tumblr, that's mostly on topics I've had in mind for a while, things I've had a clear opinion on for quite some time, so I know how to put what I think into sentences. I can't write about things that are new to me, I can't immediately react like speaking NTs can.

Plus, to self advocate it first needs to occur to you that you actually could communicate with others about this thing. Very often I'll just sit there and do nothing until someone goes "Uhm, does this bother you? Most people would be bothered." and then I realise that I'm bothered and then they'll go "You could tell people about that." and then it occurs to me that I could advocate for myself in this situation. You can only advocate for yourself if it occurs to you that you could do it.

So functional communication doesn't mean that you automatically can advocate for yourself, there are many many steps in between.

[bellaswansong]

alternative terms to nonverbal

putting this in the tag so nonverbal and nonspeaking people know what to ask others to say instead

people who sometimes lose speech need alternatives to nonverbal because nonverbal is a term that is for people who do not speak ever and will never speak. they do not want this term watered down.

here are the words i use:

wordlost: this is a temporary state. it is when you aren't going to be using words on your own. aac possibly still works, like word emojis and flashcards, and you might be able to read text out loud if it is composed for you, but you probably cannot use most words without seeing them or hearing them, and they might be difficult to arrange into sentences even once you have them. you also might still experience vocal tics including words, or echolalia including words.

talklost/speechlost: this is a temporary state. it is when you cannot speak your own words with your mouth. typing or writing words yourself still works. you might not be able to read out loud, either, but sometimes being speechlost just comes from not being able to compose your words and say them with your mouth all at once; some people might be able to type and then read out their own words while speechlost, or the same person might be able to sometimes and not others. you might also still experience vocal tics including words, or echolalia including words.

you can be speechlost and wordlost at the same time!

the first two sentences of each definition are the most important. the rest is just explaining and giving examples so please do not use that part to "gotcha" anyone unless it is to include more. do not use it to exclude others though because there are probably things i did not think of.

there is room for more terms of this format too, but i don't have those experiences, so i wouldnt know what to put in the explanations.

anyway i hope this helps!

PEOPLE IN SYSTEMS CAN USE WORDLOST AND SPEECHLOST ALSO.

oh also if you want to, you can say you are wordfound or speechfound after you stop being wordlost or speechlost! the phrase "trying to get wordfound" repeats in my head a LOT when im wordlost.

[self-indulgent-devils]

Valentino with an extremely shy reader. Him just loving to tease and push your comforts all the time. He loves to see the way you get all flustered and blush, giving his big toothy grin as he feels so much power from controlling you. If you're a bigger demon (more height wise, but can be weight too, just closer to his size) then he will especially find it adorable how someone so large can be so shy and sweet.

People wouldn't expect Valentino to like shy people since he's surrounded by confident whores most of the time. But he secretly loves someone that is so shy. They're easier to take advantage of and easier to mess with. Plus he can control them far easier since they'll most likely rely on him.

If you're someone nonverbal or semiverbal or just deal with selective mutism, he will treasure every sound you may give off. He will love to hear what you have to say if you use AAC. (We are semiverbal and so haha big fantasy there ngl.) He'll just watch you with his smug little grin and wait to hear what you have to say. He doesn't mind being patient for someone so precious and trying their best.

You may not be what he typically surrounds himself with. Nothing like Summer or Dia or Angel Dust. Nothing like Vox or Velvette. Even if it makes you insecure, Valentino doesn't care. He'll enjoy every second of you. He likes you after all. And if anyone dared to make you cry or feel like shit because you're shy or semiverbal or scared of people or struggle in any way, Val would lose it. He would kill them on the spot unless he knew it would scare you. Then he'd just have his guards take them away for him to deal with later. He would stroke you just under your chin and speak a soft voice, reassuring you that you are perfect. And if you weren't perfect, he wouldn't be there paying attention to you right now. That he loves you the way you are. That you're a rare treasure. It's not often he meets someone like you in his line of work and so he's going to keep you close and treasure you like you're the most precious and rare gemstone he's ever laid eyes on. He doesn't care what anyone has to say about it and he won't tolerate anyone making you upset or cry. Only *he* can make you feel anything like that. Only *he* can make you feel insecure for his own entertainment. Because you're his and his alone.

He adores you the way you are. Valentino wouldn't want to see you change just because the world expects someone confident and talkative. Valentino doesn't want to see you change because you feel insecure being nothing like his employees or friends. It's you being this way that has caught his attention. To lose what makes you you would be a travesty to him. So he will make sure that you always look to him for love and acceptance and help. Because he wants you to know that he is the only one able to give it to you. He would spend all the money on you because a rare gem like yourself deserves it.

Valentino won't let anyone mock you or shame you for being shyer or easily flustered or even struggling to communicate. No. It's only him that's allowed to tease you about it just to see you get all embarrassed or upset. He loves your reactions to things after all.

And no matter your size, he would love to wrap his wings around you and hold you close against him. Feeling how warm you are and keeping you there like you're sharing a blanket. He rarely does it with anyone aside from Vox and he used to do it with Angel until Angel started pissing him off. So now you're the special one he does it with. It doesn't matter if you're way bigger than him in height or weight, he will still do it. Because you. are. his. And he gets to do with you what he wants. And in that moment, it is wrapping you in his wings. Especially if it makes you feel safer because *he* should be your only sense of safety.

(I have so many ideas omfg. I gotta write a fic of a scenario like this sooner.)

[zebulontheplanet]

Curious, what does writing posts with an AAC entail and how is it different? I have never seen an AAC device, as I don't really need aids, so it is hard to imagine. Thanks for explaining if you have the time.

Hello anon ! so making a post with AAC means that I click a series of buttons and it makes the sentence for me . if you google speak for yourself it will come up with the speak for yourself app home page . you can also download speak for yourself free trial and test it out your self ! this whole post was made with speak for yourself ! it is pretty cool . it takes a lot of stress off me and is overall easier for me . it also helps me practice ! which is great . anyways I hope you have a lovely day anon .

[clownrecess]

I don't go to restaurants very often, but I wanted to talk about this anyway: Going to restaurants as an AAC user.

The fear of not being able to convey my thoughts and preferences to the waiter or waitress can make the whole dining experience unpleasant. I tend to worry that the staff may not understand my communication device, or it might be too loud to hear my device in the first place. Due to this, I have my mother (or friend, if I am with a friend) order for me. But this brings up another fear, if they don't know it is a communication device, I become afraid that they think I am an "I-Pad kid", which makes me even more anxious.

Also, ordering at a restaurant often involves a lot of pressure to perform quickly and efficiently, especially during busy times (absolutely not saying that this isn't stressful for staff too because of being rushed). This can be even more stressful for AAC users who are slower at using AAC and need extra time to type their order.

Everyone deserves to have a positive dining experience, regardless of how they communicate. Restaurant staff can play an important role in creating a welcoming and inclusive environment for AAC users. They can take the time to listen carefully, ask questions, and show empathy and patience. And for AAC users, here are a few things that you might be able to do to make it easier for yourself, too:

Prepare your order beforehand

Buy a special case with volume enchantment (I don't know what it's called but I know it exists)

Turn up your volume to the highest option if it's loud

Show the staff member your screen if necessary

Wear a pin explaining you use AAC or are nonspeaking (I recently ordered one off Etsy that says "I hear + understand but don't speak", which I am very excited to receive)

[into-the-grotto]

Autism terminology

Person with autism vs autistic person

I know that professionals dealing with disabled populations are taught directly to use person first-language regardless of what the person they’re working with prefers. Person first language is the idea of stating that the person with a disability is a PERSON and their disability is secondary.

I have seen a significant portion of the autistic community, including myself, preferring identity first terminology. My reasoning is that my autism cannot be separated from me to be to end up with the same person. My autism is very much a part of me and it shapes my experiences so I would not be who I am now without my autism. That’s not a good or bad thing. It is simply a neutral fact.

Person first language also includes using “person with a disability” as opposed to “disabled person.” The idea seems to be that the disability doesn’t define a person but a lot of the time it does and it’s important to say that. I am also physically disabled and chronically ill and being disabled has impacted my life so immensely. It is a daily occurrence that I go through. In addition, disabled is not a dirty word. It is okay to say that a disabled person is disabled. They aren’t “differently abled.” I don’t have special abilities, I literally just can’t do some things.

Honestly, I think it’s probably the best idea to just ask someone how they prefer to be talked about and the words they use to describe themselves. Some people prefer person first language to describe them and that’s okay too. Please just talk to disabled people instead of just assuming or talking over us.

Nonspeaking/Nonverbal

I unfortunately see a lot of people using “going nonverbal” to describe intense overstimulation that causes a person not to be able to speak for a period of time. Based on interactions with nonverbal people, this trivializes their experiences. Being nonverbal is a permanent of not being able to talk at all or talking very very little. You cannot become nonverbal for an hour. Your experiences matter but you don’t need to take words from people who need them to describe their struggles and experiences. Nonverbal people have different support needs to speaking people. Like they may need/use an AAC device, use sign language. They also have different struggles. People tend to talk over nonverbal people as if they are not sentient human beings. Their communication attempts can be ignored and they often are put through intense and traumatic ABA therapy to force them to speak and act more “normal” rather than just listening to their other forms of communication.

Alternative terms to use:

• verbal shutdown- inability to speak due to overstimulation

• temporary speech loss episodes- self explanatory

• selective mutism- anxiety disorder where a person cannot speak in specific situations but can speak in others

Is autism a disability?

Short answer, yes.

For most autistic people, it is a disability but for some low support needs people, they don’t consider it to be for themselves. Both views are perfectly fine. However, if you deem it to not be a disability for yourself, please do not determine that for other people. If you were to do that, you’d be wrong. The presence of a disability is generally required in order to receive care that many autistic people require to live their daily life. There are also a significant portion of disabled people in general that cannot access accommodations or support regardless of need. If you do not need support to succeed, you are privileged. You are also not the majority and you need to keep other people with higher support needs in mind when you make blanket statements. Or better yet, don’t make blanket statements at all.

High/Low functioning labels

These are not accurate ways to describe autistic people. The correct terms would be high/low support needs. Functioning labels are harmful to low support needs folks because we are unable to access support we need and they’re harmful to high support needs folks because their thoughts are disregarded with the assumption they don’t have important insights and experiences.

Asperger’s/aspie

I do not support the use of aspie/Aspergers to describe even oneself. The reason being that Hans Asperger was a Nazi. The term was used to determine which autistic people got to live during the Holocaust. Usually, I’m all for people determining which words vibe best with them but this word reeks of supremacy. It’s the same concept as saying you’re “one of the good ones.” I don’t support acting like this in any community. We all have the same disorder and it’s not cool to separate yourself from those you view as lesser, even if that thought is subconscious.

ABA

Applied behavioral analysis therapy is a way that neurotypicals try to force their societal standards onto autistic people, mainly high support needs folks. It is generally regarded to be abusive because their whole philosophy is to “break” a person down and “rebuild” them again in the way the therapist wants them to act. If your thought process surrounding disabled people involves breaking them, you are not safe. Autistic people are whole people and the opinions of allistic (not autistic) people do not matter on that.

Autism Speaks and the puzzle piece/Light it up Blue

A lot of well meaning allistic people donate and support Autism Speaks. I understand the appeal if you are uneducated on the harm they have caused. Their overall goal is to cure autism. A lot of “autism moms” (mothers of autistic children that make their child’s autism their whole personality) say that they hate the autism but love their child. The autism cannot be separated from the autistic person. Autism is a neurotype. It influences the way autistic people interact with and perceive the world around them. An autistic person without their autism would have entirely different experiences and mannerisms. They would be an entirely different person. That’s why autistic activists fight against the search for a cure. My autism does cause immense difficulties in my life but I don’t want to be allistic. I would not be me as an allistic person. If there is a cure, I don’t want it. We should be spending resources helping autistic people in the moment and meeting them where they are instead of trying to change them. Searching for a cure when we are actively in need of support is disrespectful at the very least.

The puzzle piece is incredibly offensive to most autistic people. The whole idea behind it is that autistic people are not whole. That we need our “missing piece” to be whole human beings. That we are somehow lacking. I hope I don’t have to explain why that sucks.

Light it up blue isn’t exactly bad on its own but it comes with the whole of autism speaks. It also symbolizes that autism was a “boy’s disorder” for a very long time.

Awareness and Acceptance

While I believe that autism awareness is important, it can only do so much. Plus, most people already know about autism, and they’re terrified of it. Acceptance is so much more important. You may be aware of autism but unless you accept autistic people with open arms, you are not safe to us. You must accept us as we are and let us breathe in your presence.

Final thoughts and a call in

I am only one autistic person. I do not have all the insight of every autistic person. I tried my best to cover many of the things I believe are important but I definitely couldn’t cover everything. This already took me a week to research and write because I’m disabled and struggle with projects like this. If you have more to share, please reblog with your own experiences and stuff you wish people knew. If I got something wrong, tell me (kindly please). I hope we can work together to make the community and society as a whole safer and more welcoming!

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

sometimes yes! do get frustrate and angry at parents of nonverbal/nonspeaking/minimally speaking autistic ppl/child when they don’t do enough for AAC.

when they so afraid AAC will replace or hinder/slow spoken mouth words (study show it doesn’t), they rather not give child access to alternative AAC communication *now* and bank on future chance that child will somehow develop mouth words in future magically.

or when they say “it so difficult so many responsibility so much effort & concentration & determination” as if their nonverbal nonspeaking child learning AAC themselves doesn’t take (even more) effort & concentration & determination or whatever. as if their nonverbal child isn’t frustrated to no end at not able to reliably communicate (whether they aware of people & communicate or not).

but even tho i angry i rage i want do bad things, i don’t go attack parents in their comment section, call them names, call them abusive, call them “don’t care about their child,” call CPS on them (yes people do that), etc. because it doesn’t help anyone involved, doesn’t help the parent understand more AND doesn’t help the autistic person under the parents care.

in fact it probably do more harm than good: it isolated parents from community, isolated parents from able to ask autustic people who was or are nonverbal, it makes parents resent autistic community and even their child because everytime they remind of autism they think attack.

parents are not victim of their autistic child, yes! it’s endlessly problematic when they make themselves seem like the most impacted the biggest victim who needs pity.

but parents are victims of different kind. they victims of ableist society that don’t care about disabled people. they victim of this society that doesn’t care to provide services and funding to help disabled people survive, live, gain skills, and thrive. many of these disabled people, especially disabled children, require caregivers. parents are victims of not enough respite care, not enough compassionate education and training, bad clinicians, etc. would even go as far to say that parents of autistic children/adults are victim of same/similar *social* forces of ableist society as autistic children and adults.

so many parents of autistic people isolated and tired and helpless, because society made them that way!! so many parents of autistic people do care about their child (in their own way). yes, there are martyr parents, yes, there are abusive parents, and yes, unfortunately some of these abusive parents are intentionally abusive.

by attacking and isolating all parents, you are isolating the autistic kids (and adults!!!!!!) under their care, many of whom cannot communicate (yet or ever), go online, self advocate, etc!! some autistic people need 24/7 care their entire life. you are doing a disservice to these very autistic people you are claiming to help.

by attacking and isolating all parents, the most you doing is self indulgent, release your own anger and then pat yourself on back thinking you did something. i’m really sorry many of us had abusive unsupportive parents and have intense trauma because of it (i do too!!!), but that doesn’t justify us project our trauma on every parent we see. it doesn’t mean every parent of autistic people out there responsible for our own trauma.

yes, even parents who “deserve it.” because our goal is to help the autistic person under their care.

it our own responsibility to keep our trauma in check and work on our own trauma.

we can be angry at our own parents. can be angry at parents do bad things say bad things, whether they intend to or not. i get very angry at many parents i see online and in research papers!!! but we all need learn when and who and how it is & is not appropriate to express that trauma.

yes, these parents are isolated and trying their best. sometimes their “trying their best” is questionable and even abusive and harmful. they deserve and NEED education and compassion and community. if not for them then for the disabled person under their care.

they also need take accountability for their actions and harm they did and ableism. even if they absorb that ableism and express in way they did because societal ableism and societal pressure and systemic problems.

AND at same time. it’s not responsibility of individual autistic people to educate and correct these parents on the misinformation and harmful and even abusive and vile thing they do and say. they deserve education and support, but it doesn’t have to be you.

but ultimately, attacking parents in their face doesn’t accomplish anything other than give yourself ego boost (and make yourself very, very angry).

if you can’t care about the parents yet, care about the autistic people under their care.

[ohsoconfused]

do you have any trans mute tips?

hello im transmuteflux myself!!!!

TRANSMUTE TIPS ✽

first, you need to figure why youre mute. common reasons are:

- physical damage (apraxia, paralysis, illness, brain damage)

- anxiety/trauma

i cant give you tips on damaging your own throat or brain so ill give you tips an anxiety/trauma induced mutism!

- have a select group of people you talk to and slowly include fewer and fewer people until its only your closest relationships!

- when going somewhere, ask your close relationships who all will be there. be uncomfortable if its too many people/youll have to talk a lot

- keep a little notebook or have your phone ready to communicate through writing

- learn asl, even just the alphabet and basic words!

- invest in an aac (augmentative and alternative communication) device or app!

- strain your voice/hurt your throat as an excuse to not talk. just scream for a bit

- consume media about mutism!!

- opt for non verbal responses such as nodding/shaking your head, shrugging your shoulders, and facial expressions

- opt for texting instead of phone calls

- if you NEED to talk, speak quietly

- stop talking/singing to yourself!!

keep in mind: its okay to have a lot of words in your head!! most mute people do!!