#space battles podcast

[rickybaby]

Genuine question as I am curious — I know it’s pretty obvious with his expressions/ body language that Daniel seemed shy/insecure(?) about having his braces, but has he ever outright said anything about feeling that way with them? Just out of curiosity as I am new around here!

“I feel very different in terms of looks. Fortunately, experience also bought me better looks. I’m not really too fond of showing people photos of me when I was younger”

[sshbpodcast]

Character Spotlight: Jake Sisko

By Ames

We’ve talked a bunch of times on A Star to Steer Her By about how Jake Sisko is the best. He’s one of the best child characters in the whole Star Trek franchise, in both writing and acting (second to maybe Mezoti and/or Rok-Tahk). His relationship with his father is depicted so beautifully in so many episodes, as we’ll surely discuss below. And that kid’s personal style bypasses Wesley Crusher’s in every single way.

So this week, we’re picking up a Jake Sisko holonovel to read as your SSHB hosts declare our favorite Jake-O moments and scrape up some bad moments to consider. Our definition of what a Worst Moment is – which was shaky at best to begin with – gets really stretched this week. So enjoy them all below, listen to our chatter this week on the podcast (jump over to 1:01:52), and prepare for Jake Sisko to make a deal for you to have great damn day.

[Images © CBS/Paramount]

Best moments

“A” is for Apple, “B” is for Best friend ever Jake is just a straight-up good kid. So good that we happily forgive everything on our bad list, and this early moment really established what a pure heart he has. When Rom pulls Nog out of Keiko’s school in “The Nagus” and Sisko is about to get all racist at the Ferengi for corrupting his son, we learn that Jake has been sneaking off to teach Nog to read, squashing all the jumped-to conclusions and being the example that everyone on the station needs right now.

Who wears the lobes in this relationship? Speaking of teaching things to Nog, when the two form the Noh-Jay Consortium in “Progress,” which is adorable enough on its own, Jake somehow schools Nog on the value of owning land when they start trading assets around. How a Ferengi doesn’t understand real estate is beyond me, but Jake knows a good deal when he sees one. Turns out Jake’s got the lobes!

My friend’s real sorry for what he did In our Nog coverage on the podcast, I mistakenly sullied Jake’s name, claiming he started a fight with the Skrrean kids in “Sanctuary.” Well I was dead wrong! Jake, the ever goody-two-shoes, actually tries to prevent the fight and then does one better by patching things up with Tumak in line for the replimat later. How I could think Jake would have a vicious bone in his body was my error.

I need to find what’s me While we gave Nog lots of props for pursuing his dream of being the first Ferengi to join Starfleet, Jake goes the opposite path, and we love him even more for it! You’d think with a father commanding a whole station, Jake would go the Starfleet route too, but in “Shadowplay,” he reveals he’d rather pursue something he’s more passionate about.

First let me get the hang of flying at impulse When the away team gets captured during “The Jem’Hadar,” Jake and Nog sneak aboard the runabout to escape. Despite not knowing how to pilot the thing, Jake is able to elude disaster and invaders long enough to be rescued. Add to that the fact that they were there to ensure Nog got a passing grade, and Jake comes out as the hero of this episode! (Sorry, Quark.)

If I go, you’ll be all alone Even though he wants to spend time with Leanne, Jake decides to accompany his father on the lightship in “Explorers.” This episode gives us some more of those patented lovely father-son moments of the two being honest and supportive of each other, as Jake expresses his interest in writing and also that he’s concerned about Ben coping without him if he went away to school.

Something called “Sliding into Second” An episode later in “Family Business,” Sisko relents to Jake’s insistence that he get a girlfriend by going on a date with Kasidy Yates based on his son’s matchmaking skills. And it turns out Kasidy is perfect for Ben! Now whether Ben is perfect for Kasidy is another matter altogether that we hinted at a little in our Ben Sisko post, but let’s just say Jake has solid taste.

To my father, who’s coming home I cannot overstate how beautiful “The Visitor” is, and at the center of it is Jake’s relationship with Ben, undoubtedly the strongest asset of all of Deep Space Nine. Jake’s love for his missing father is so strong and pure that he dedicates his life to getting him back from the white void. Is it what Ben would have wanted? Absolutely not. But is it perfect for Jake Sisko? Tremendously.

You may be a little rusty, but you’re still the Chief When O’Brien has gone through literal decades of torture after his brain adventure in “Hard Time,” who better than Jake Sisko to help reacclimate him to all his tools? Jake, who apprenticed briefly under the Chief earlier in the series, shows characteristic patience and empathy for the man who is clearly in need of much rehabilitation and therapy.

The line between courage and cowardice Cirroc Lofton gets his time to shine in “...Nor the Battle to the Strong,” providing an understandably terrified face to the front lines. Not only does he scrub up to help Julian and the other combat medics as injured soldiers start pouring in, AND thwart a Klingon siege by blasting out the ceiling, but he also reminds us that war is absolutely horrifying, in case we’ve forgotten.

You can always find something that’ll make you smile Yet another feel-good moment comes from Jake in the entire lovetrip that is “In the Cards.” While trying to cheer up his dad by getting him a baseball card, Jake and Nog find themselves running a series of fetch quests that add up to one thing: finding ways to make everyone have a nice day, even in the middle of the Dominion War. It was a breath of fresh air in a very serious season.

Let people read it and decide for themselves While Nog and the rest of Red Squad were entirely taken in by the opportunity to play war, Jake saw through Watters’s bullshit immediately in “Valiant.” He’s able to scrape Nog and Dorian Collins together and save them from destruction. And I’ve got to give him credit for endeavoring to write both sides of the story, without bias or condemnation, even if Watters deserves it.

—

Worst moments

Watch the wheel, not the girl Boy, that Jake Sisko has a type, and that type is older Bajorans. We first meet Mardah in the flesh in “The Abandoned,” and not only is she a Dabo Girl (whom we know have sex acts with Quark written into their contracts), but she’s also too old for him. I don’t know what age of consent laws are in the future, but when she’s 20 and he’s 16, it just feels on the wrong side of legal.

Stop calling her Nerys When things with Mardah don’t work out, Jake sets his sights on another Bajoran who’s definitely too old for him in “Fascination”: Major Kira. And sure, you could justify this one by saying that everyone on the station is affected by Lwaxana Troi’s Zanthi Fever, but out of all the uncomfortable pairings, it was this one that just felt kinda gross about it.

I guess I just forgot you’re a Ferengi While we blame Nog for his terrible behavior during their double date in “Life Support,” Jake isn’t innocent either. First, how he let Nog weasel in is just a goofy plot device to make the episode happen. But also, Jake shows naivete on his part for not understanding that this is perfectly normal for a Ferengi, and blaming his friend for his upbringing isn’t a good look.

So you’re Jennifer Sisko, but you’re just not my mom Okay, this one’s a little on Ben too for trusting mirror Jennifer to be alone with Jake, like a fool, but Jake’s whole attitude toward his mirror mom in “Shattered Mirror” plays right into her trap. He is so blindsided by her presence that he doesn’t think rationally, even if he’s heard the stories about how nefarious everyone is in the alternate universe. Jake, don’t trust this imposter!

I can spot a creative soul a galaxy away Jake’s weird thing for older women shows up again in “The Muse” when Onaya easily manipulates the poor boy. This is just an episode after “Shattered Mirror,” when his mirror mom took advantage of his trusting nature and eagerness to believe people have good intentions. And this soul-sucker preys on him so easily because he lets himself get taken in.

How much laundry is too much laundry? One last one that’s on both Nog’s and Jake’s list somewhere, since the two are so intertwined: While Nog has become a complete square in “The Ascent,” Jake has turned into a slob so comically disorganized that it stretches credulity. Nog is literally gone for several hours and when he’s returned, Jake’s laundry coats their quarters. How is that even possible?

These visions, they’re not worth dying for This is one of those instances that’s more bad for Jake than bad for us at home. When Ben is catatonic from prophet visions in “Rapture,” it’s Jake’s responsibility as next of kin to decide his fate. He chooses for his father to live, partly selfishly, even though it’s not what Ben would have wanted. But really, I say they should have put this decision on Joe and not a teenage boy.

Just remember, Bashir is spelled with an I Consistently, it’s a running joke on the show that Jake’s spelling is poor. It comes up a couple of times! Nog has to correct all his spelling in “The Ascent.” Sisko points it out when he reads Anslem in “The Muse.” And clearly he spelled Dr. Bashir’s name wrong in his article from “...Nor the Battle to the Strong” because Julian reminds him of the spelling in “Call to Arms.”

This is where I belong After all the Starfleet personnel have abandoned the station in “Call to Arms,” Jake opts to stay behind to do some journalism work, hoping that his status as the Emissary’s son will keep him safe because the Bajorans will revolt if some harm comes to him. So he effectively makes himself a hostage of the Dominion just for a writing gig. Weird flex, Jake-O.

What about freedom of the press? And then the stories Jake writes about the Dominion occupation don’t even go anywhere because Weyoun keeps intercepting them in “A Time to Stand”! Jake, my dude, you can’t go writing clearly biased stories and thinking they’ll make it to your audience. You think Weyoun’s going to let you interview him when he knows your angle? Oh you sweet summer child.

Anything for a story I’ll admit that Jake’s actions and uncharacteristic ability to see through bullshit in “Valiant” were commendable, but his reasons for being there in the first place were thin at best. He weasels into Nog’s trip to Ferenginar to try to get an exclusive interview with the Nagus. Presumptuous much, kid? This after promising to Nog that he wouldn’t be acting as a reporter on his mission.

Please, no more Vic Fontaine! When Nog returns to the station in “It’s Only a Paper Moon” after his leg replacement and clearly suffering from PTSD, the support he gets from friends, family, and professional therapists alike is laughable. Even Jake. It strikes me as out of character that Jake fails at being tolerant of Nog’s wishes during a painful time. Maybe get the guy some comically large headphones instead of kicking him out next time.

—

Send this one off to the presses because we’re done! We’ve still got some more Deep Space Nine characters to spotlight coming up, so keep following along for those. We also hope you’re watching Enterprise along with us over on SoundCloud or wherever you get your podcasts. You can play some dot-jot with us over on Facebook and Twitter, and check your spelling before submitting because evidently there’s no Clippy on DS9!

[the-summ0ning]

Sleep Token HC: being in a relationship with vessel

Hello, I hope you like my final HC for Ves. Fluff elements with highly NSFW ideas. 🤠 I’m always open to HC requests as well 🤭

Vessel, vessel, vessel—where do we begin?

Vessel the bf that is so deeply profoundly in love with you

If he could he’d rip his heart out of his chest for you and just hand it to you, he would.

His love languages would be words of affirmation and physical touch

He often battles with icky thoughts of himself, and you’re his ever radiant light in his bleakest days, so he would go out of his way to make sure it was known

Notes everywhere around your house, even a month and half into tour, you keep finding them

Praises in your medicine cabinet, crumbled pieces of paper at the bottom of your bags bc he know you won’t find them right away. Little Sonnets on your desk or on the fridge just so you know how much you are loved by him

Once you stopped finding them around the house or in your things, he’d start sending flowers or treats with love notes attached. Just because gestures especially if the night before you told him what a long week it was and knew you were struggling

You have so many of these notes, post its, scraps of paper you’ve compiled them in a scrapbook/binder and it’s on your bookshelf now

Texts for when you wake up reminding you to take your meds/vitamins, and to keep up with your water intake—voice memos too

Honestly he’d send you voice memos all the time like it was your own little podcast

Having black paint smeared on you because he couldn’t keep his hands to himself

Or would want you to apply his body paint before a show. Squirming underneath your fingers as you apply it because of your featherlight touches, listening to his quiet hisses when you’d go too low and gentle

“We’re not going to make it out of this dressing room if you keep doing that, love.”

Vessel would love to be big spoon, having you tucked underneath him or your back against his chest. Tracing patterns on your arms, hips, and thighs

He always loomed around you, everyone knowing if you were there, he was somewhere lurking around 95% of the time. He was a quietly protective man.

Coming up when you were talking with friends at an event, a comforting squeeze to the nape of your neck and a drink to quietly check on you

Wearing one of his extra robes backstage. It was so big and light, perfect for the hot and humid venues, a great blanket tbh where you could use the hood to cover your face

There’s a folder in his phone dedicated with pictures of you in many spaces of the venues they played just sleeping with his robe over you

Also the amount of videos of you two just frolicking around backstage, helping him with dance moves whilst in his robe that dragged on the floor, nearly tripping on it, when you wore it because it was so long on you

You liked to go into the crowd during the shows, enjoying the atmosphere of fans. Vessel would get a kick out of that, and you two would make it like a game almost

Instantly being able to spot you in the crowd through the lights and smoke. Always looking in your direction to lowkey serenade you and do little inconspicuous moves directed for you. In return, you’d run your hands through up and down your body swaying your hips to his voice. His own little siren in the sea of people

He loved watching you jam tf out with the fans so careless in your own world dancing with everyone or receiving bracelets from the fellow concertgoers (he would panic slightly watching you try to go into the mosh pit every time tho, one time he actually had to send a member of the crew to discreetly retrieve you.)

I imagine vessel being codependent af, and the simplest of tasks you were always requested to tag along

groceries, pharmacy trips, picking up takeout—he needed his emotional support person. Bribing and rewarding you with little treats to lure you with him thinking you’d say no how could you he’d hit you with the puppy dog eyes I just know he’s master at that

Staying up or waking up to listen to his late night rambles/dreams/conspiracies tucked under his arm while sharing a joint or bottle of spirits

Or sitting beside him as he wrote song lyrics, quietly running them by you for your opinion. You just blinking slowly in awe with what his mind created unable to provide the input he wanted

I thinks it’s a mutual consensus among us: Vessel loves to bite. He can’t help his carnal primal urge to. He does it with his friends, you… Everyone had a mark from him at this point

I don’t imagine him being into quickies (unless he was absolutely throbbing and thirsting for you) this man would take his time. Setting the pace all during the day teasing you

He loved nuzzling his face in the crook of your neck, pressing kisses below your ear and whispering the filthiest things to get you flustered

“You look so good right now, I could take you right here.”

“I can’t wait to get you home and be deep inside you later, doll.” He would murmur, his hand squeezing your hip pulling you back into him feeling his already hardening length pressing in the soft flesh of your ass

Then when it finally happened, he goes at a nearly agonizing pace—he wanted to worship you. He didn’t like to fuck, he liked to make love.

intense and passionate, hips slowly rolling into you up til you were full of him. And he kept hitting that spot that made your eyes see stars and lulled to the back of your head.

He was not shy about how he felt, always moaning and praising you, but wasn’t too loud. Vocal fry as he quietly moaned about how good you made him feel

“You’re squeezing me so well,” rasping out, trying to look at where your bodies connected, resisting the urge to close his eyes

“Fuck, you look so pretty under me.”

He’s 100% a morning sex person

Not even letting either of you have a chance to get out of bed, one hand slipping down your front rubbing you softly while the other gripped your throat to turn your face so he could slowly kiss you—devouring your mouth with his—all in a blissed out half sleep stupor

Hehe, I woke up from my nap and chose violence horniness, sorry. Anyways thanks for the support and all the love on these 🫶🏻✨

[ekebolou]

I get that people have complicated relationships with higher education, and that's 100% reasonable, but there's something I want to point out.

when you hear a popular podcast or youtuber or history show or see a popular history book or article say it's 'revealing' or 'uncovering' or 'bringing to light' or 'reevaluating' some story of the past, it's usually doing so off of academic history work done by people in academia.

Journalists and your average YouTuber are generally the worst about not crediting this work,* but it's there in the background, nonetheless.

That work - academic research, particularly of this kind, and the articles, books, and other information it produces - doesn't get done without institutional support. That is, like with everything, sure some enthusiasts will keep at their particular interests hell or high water, and rich folks can peruse to their hearts' content - that's what fueled the eighteenth and nineteenth centuries' ever-increasing investigative output.

And that should be concerning, not comforting.

Not because all of that output was wrong or terrible or misguided - a lot was, but much of it is still essential, foundational, exceedingly rigorous and useful - but because much of modern history work, twentieth century on, has been a century-long battle to correct some of deeply culturally embedded beliefs an almost wholly dilettante pursuit of the past generated. It's kind of a joke in English-language scholarship that the Victorians ruined everything, but like, for real, y'all, the Victorians left us some BURDENS, from fake relics created for ~the aesthetic~ to defaced and destroyed historical documents.

Academic research in itself is not some kind of panacea. we're not shitting on dilettantes (I am very much a dilettante, in my way) and so-called 'amateurs', who are vital and excellent contributors to knowledge. We're also not saying institutions are always perfect and good and don't need to change. I'm saying that robust, diverse, in-depth, careful, broadly reaching, and most of all interesting and new scholarship requires something on the scale of institutional support.

This is not just because that's where your historians live, but because in a very practical sense, that's where your archives live. You do actually need a big building stuffed with Things Of The Past well-maintained and with a core of well-trained and extremely cool (like librarians, all archivists are extremely cool in my books, even if they're kind of assholes, as long as they are good archivists).

Archivists are currently doing a lot with very little support - like a lot of academics and librarians, really - because that's what people do. When they care about doing something, they get along, they scrape by, they suck it up. But they need buildings, they need climate control, they need continuing training and new people coming into the field - if the idea is that we have so many documents from the past extant today because archives DON'T need institutional-level support, then you are severely misinformed about how much of the past has survived to the present day. And if the idea is that we'll preserve the IMPORTANT bits of the past regardless then you're also sadly misinformed about how good we are at determining what's important, and how frequently (and with growing frequency) disasters of various kinds wipe places out (Lisbon 1755, for example), and how robust any of our documentation (often ESPECIALLY the 'important' stuff) is in terms of long-term survival.

There's a theory going around that THIS period - like the 2000s through today and into the future - will produce a 'dark age' for future historians because the digital infrastructure which not only underpins almost all of our day-to-day lives but is how we've decided to 'save space' - by preserving things digitally rather than in hard copy - is so unspeakably vulnerable and weak. Everyday folks have already, for the most part, lost access to things like CDs, which have a lifespan of something like 100 years at the most. Proprietary softwares, black box devices with irreplaceable parts, flimsy modern materials with difficult to preserve features mean a whole of information that drives our lives today will simply become inaccessible in, actually, a very short time.

Archives - vast storehouses under careful supervision full of well-organized stuff that might potentially be important one day - need institutional support, but also, on their own, are kind of... well, let's just say, Historians will also say shit like they 'uncovered' a 'hidden history' in a previously 'lost, unknown' document that some archivist put in a special box on a special shelf and carefully catalogued for prime findability. It's a symbiotic relationship that doesn't always get its due. An archive on its own can be very useful to a local community, an individual business, a specific family, all kinds of things - but to get History out of it, you need some Historians or suitably rabid individuals of other castes. You need both, or you end up with the pseudo-histories of nineteenth-century rich folk that then get to determine what we believe is possible for the future by what we are told of the past. It's a bad scene.

Again, there are further steps to take - not over here defending institutions as they stand. We were, at one point, on our way to accessible higher education, meaning everyone had a chance to go to pursue their interests, before we started seeing Universities not as a social good and social resource but as job training and profit centers and cut social funding as demanded by business ghouls. Higher education and academia as it functions now has done a lot of damage to people's lives.

But institutions are much harder to build than to change, and change is hard enough. Once an archive is defunded, its collections distributed or destroyed, you typically don't get it back. Like certain species of sea creatures with long gestational periods, once you destroy the mid-range of the population - the bit that raises up the next generation - your population collapses and its very hard to get things back on track (historians and other academics who require lots of investment and training and time and experience are like the sea creatures, you see).

You can, of course, start new. We've done that a lot, as a species. It's always possible. But it's a bit like running out of a fire empty-handed instead of grabbing your wallet as you go. Sometimes you just gotta go, and that's always safest - sometimes you just can't think or there's no time to think and you couldn't get to anything useful if you wanted to - but if it's matter of looking at the wallet in your pants pocket and dipping down to grab it (and maybe pants!) while you bolt then yeah, ought to try. Maybe the pants catch fire and you've got to abandon them anyway to save your life. That's reasonable. (This is just an analogy - fire safety generally says to get ye gone with your life and health intact ASAP, just for the record - don't stop for shit and don't go back in).

The point of this is that next time you're enjoying some popular history content (please save me from this word) or learn some cool fact about the past, think about the fact that none of that get down to you without a big chain of people all joined together doing different things. And that big chain needs nice big social supports to exist. The social supports are hard to change, but the chain is easy to lose without them. It's a group effort all the way, even that little fucker who didn't credit the work they used to make fun videos is important.

That content doesn't happen without the structure to support it - or even worse, that content lies to you. Makes stuff up. The stuff it makes up isn't going to be fantasies of freedom and equality, at least going by what's been made up before.

Hate the academy, want it to change, act to reform it - all very good, go for it, no desire to stop you (except maybe the hating part, try to hate more specifically, like individual actions or aspects of the academy, if you're going to hate on stuff, but, like, hate can be unhealthy, get some peace in your life if you can). Things are bad enough without also feeling like you have to take on a crusade to save archives or other institutions - though honestly just participating in your local history scene, giving them time and attention, is really valuable help - so that's not really the call to action here. The call is just asking you to notice the big structures that enable these small joys.

Don't let yourself be convinced that they somehow happen in a vacuum, that they'll just persist somehow like getting Deliveroo at your off-grid mountain cabin. A lot people helped make that stupid podcast about Marie Antoinette's toenail fungus happen - and there's way more than that waiting! If we can just keep letting people make archives, study stuff, fuck off on fruitless searches for things that were never there and instead find stuff we never KNEW was there. There's so much of that to be done! The more the merrier on who should be doing it! But if we want that, we got to figure out how to support it, to keep what we've got, build more of it, or it'll be the same shit about Marie Antoinette over and over and over and over and over because that'll all we'll have to build from.

Anyway, if you've never done it, take a ghost tour. Visit a museum nearby. Pop into an archive and just ask them some stuff. Get on these web pages that do things like recreate Angkor Wat as a virtual tour, go watch a Youtuber do a frothing-at-the-mouth defense of Charles Lightoller, or even better, read this reddit thread about whether Dua Lipa would have survived the Titanic sinking based on her music video. And just think - holy shit, isn't it cool that we have a society, a whole social structure, that could produce such a thing? And it's right here, at my fingertips, ready to disappear.

*there are reasons for this, some related to format and legibility/accessibility that still shouldn't eliminate the need to credit others' work and others cowardly excuses for parasitism

[kingofthewilderwest]

While I'm willing to give the live-action HTTYD a chance, I wish executives didn't play it safe and instead did spinoffs that do something new and exciting with it's world that helps expand it in the same vein as say Andor, Puss in Boots: The Last Wish, Better Call Saul, etc. How come they can't do that when it's a franchise with such potential for its world-building?

A non-comprehensive list of better ways to expand the HTTYD franchise without redoing a movie that's not old:

HTTYD faithful book series retelling in a 2D television show with one (on occasion two) episodes per book

HTTYD prequel with Valka and Stoick

HTTYD midquel with Valka's dragon lady adventures

HTTYD midquel with Drago's backstory

HTTYD movie short about Gobber's missing socks

HTTYD movie long about Gobber's missing socks

HTTYD movie spinoff about the Dragon Viking games

HTTYD spinoff in Ancient Rome

HTTYD spinoff in Ancient Persia

HTTYD spinoff in East Asia

HTTYD spinoff in Southeast Asia

HTTYD spinoff in South America

HTTYD spinoff in North Africa

HTTYD spinoff but in space (space dragons)

HTTYD musical stage play

HTTYD performative art exhibit

HTTYD M-rated Action RPG with story-altering choices and multiple endings

HTTYD puppet show with sock puppets made, written, and performed by 9-year-olds. Plot deviations encouraged

HTTYD as interpreted by a game of American football

HTTYD but it's a cooking show and no one knows how to make soufflé

HTTYD pornhub special

HTTYD worldwide scavenger hunt for Hiccup's prosthetic leg

HTTYD but presented as a true crime podcast

HTTYD but it's just Monty Python

HTTYD retold but it's steampunk, Toothless is an automaton that gains sentience, and Stoick wears a top hat and both Stoick and Gobber have long, elegant, up-curled mustaches

HTTYD retold but it's rated R and different characters live or die and the screen is so dark in the battle scenes that you're not sure what happened

HTTYD retold and it's live action but every actor is an actual kitten and they just mew and chase each other

HTTYD retold with actual lizards. The lizards barely move. They're sitting on their rock. Now they're sitting on each other. Now the gecko is licking its eyeball. Oh look there's a toad.

HTTYD crossover with Rise of the Guardians (never heard this idea before)

HTTYD crossover with Rise of the Guardians and Frozen and Brave (definitely never heard this idea before)

HTTYD crossover with Rise of the Guardians and Frozen and Brave and Big Hero 6 (never ever seen or heard of this)

HTTYD crossover with Shark Tale

HTTYD crossover with The Bee Movie

HTTYD crossover with Shark Tale and The Bee Movie

HTTYD but it's just an edit of every time a character says "the" "and" or "no" and the soundtrack has been replaced by the skibidi toilet song

HTTYD but it's the trilogy's script carved into the skin of a pear and written backwards

HTTYD but it's a workplace movie mockumentary as acted out by Beethoven, Chopin, Rachmaninoff, and the other composers. Toothless is played by Stravinsky.

HTTYD but it's a bimonthly curated box of snacks

Now. On a somewhat more serious note. It's not to say that a live action retelling in and of itself is good or bad. There are good live action retellings and they can be inspired and there are some worth receiving a chance.

But personally, I'm all about the carved pear option.

[phantom-of-the-501st]

Fives Thoughts

Sooooo I literally just made a post being like 'here are some fun bits from Umbara because the arc is depressing and I don't wanna talk about the sad bits' but uh... I had thoughts in the last 15 mins and now I wanna share them. 😃

And of course tagging as usual for people I'm interested to hear opinions from: @saturn-sends-hugs @inkstainedhandswithrings @the-bi-space-ace

It's been a while since I watched these story arcs back-to-back, so a lot of the character development is really showing atm. And one I find interesting is a shift in Fives between The Citadel and Umbara.

Fives has always had a bit of a firey personality, but up until this point he's been a little bit held back with that passion for the most part. And I'm gonna touch in something that @novaceleste and @spaceyjessa spoke about in their podcast (@coffeeandclones I was just listening to it the other day and they talk about some interesting points. Defo recommend you check it out. Also #JusticeForDroidbait2024) because it really is the basis for this whole point. Despite Fives being the brasher, slightly more hardheaded personality, and Echo being the more by-the-books one, it's Echo that tends to do a lot of the talking when authority is involved. When they speak to Shaak Ti, it's Echo that takes the lead, while Fives is a little more hesitant.

And when they first meet Rex and Cody, Fives automatically introduces himself as CT-27-5555, despite being very open about his displeasure of being called that throughout their training. He has this louder personality but he tends to draw into himself and panic slightly when put in front of authority.

However, he still has these more fiery moments, like during his speech in ARC Troopers. When he's put in a fight, that spark within him comes out full force. "My blood is boiling for a fight." That's what drives Fives. That's where that passion comes from. He always wanted to make ARC trooper, to prove himself and to demonstrate that fire in the fight.

And yet when we get to the Citadel, he's surprisingly nervous. Echo seems to be fairly on board with everything, he's listening intently, he's down with the plan. But Fives is rather hesitant and doesn't seem totally enthused about the whole thing. They've made ARC trooper, they're being included in a specialist mission, the things that Fives so desperately worked for. But now that they're here? He's really not comfortable with it.

And I think that Fives' passion and drive is so prominent in the heat of battle because his adrenaline is going, he's got the energy to burn and so that's when we see this fire in him. But in the quieter moments, the meetings, the in-between fights? He's nervous. Those are the moments where he can sit on it and really think about what they're up against. And what becomes really apparent is that Fives is absolutely terrified of the thing that fuels his fire. The thing he worked so hard for scares the absolute shit out of him. And for good reason.

But it's never been so much of an issue because he had Echo. Echo, who's more level headed, who feels comfortable with plans and formats and authority. He could be the comforting presence that Fives needed outside of battle, while Fives could be the spark in it. They're like fire and water. They keep each other regulated, balanced.

But then The Citadel happens.

And watching the Umbara arc, I noticed that Fives doesn't have that very noticeable fear. It's not that it's absent, it's just that it isn't so obvious all of the time. Of course, some of that is going to come with experience, he's been an ARC for longer, he's know Rex for a while so there's slightly more comfort with that level of authority, but he's definitely more consistently confident than he was before.

So my suggestion is, what if that comes as a result of losing Echo (at least in part)? He doesn't have that calming presence anymore, the one to balance his nerves. He doesn't have someone to stand firm beside him or take the bigger step for the two of them, so he's had to learn to do that himself. I think part of it is natural growth that comes with experience (to quote Rex: "experience outranks everything") but I do also think it comes with no longer having that constant other half. Fives has had to learn to balance himself.

Like I said earlier, a lot of this links back to stuff said in Nova and Jessa's podcast, so I'd recommend checking it out. But I just wanted to add my extra thoughts on it, having just watched Umbara, because it definitely stuck out to me on this rewatch.

[smoshyourheadin]

yay!!!!!! mother is back!!!!!!

could i request a spencer agnew x reader where they meet at a bar and spencer ends up taking the reader home and it ends however you want

Butterflies That Flutter By

pairing: spencer agnew x f!reader

a/n: I. LOVE. THIS. anon u cooked w this. i went CRAZAAAAY!! two posts in one night who am i!! also sorry if u wanted smut i don’t feel comfortable writing it for real ppl!! charachters i can consider it tho ;)

warnings: if u don’t like mentions of alcohol or just a bar setting then this probably isn’t for u!! i’m sure ill catch you at another time tho <3

requests r open <33

saturdays are when you thrive. going out with all your college friends was just tradition at this point.

sitting at the bar in between anna and courtney, you complain about another failed date you had recently.

“ugh, he was just the worst! he was talking about his podcast the whole time, and then asked me to go back to his place? what do men expect me to say after that. ‘oh yes you talking about your alpha male, gym, i hate women podcast really made me so attracted to you’ like come on!” you turn to anna who’s laughing at you, with a sad stare, and she then is quick to put a hand on your shoulder.

“it’s okay! im sure you’ll find your man soon. isn’t court trying to set you up with that guy from her work?” she says to you, cocking her head to the side slightly.

courtney then chimes in, “yes! oh my gosh, her and spencer are literally perfect for each other! you need to meet him soon, you’ll love him!” she says with a wide smile.

“i mean, he is pretty cute…” you trail off.

courtney had been trying to set you and her friend spencer up for weeks now, and as she continued to gush about how spencer would appreciate your nerdiness and how you would adore his, you feel a tug of curiosity. ignoring the conversation for a moment, you make your way to the old street fighter arcade machine at the end of the bar. the familiar sounds of the game fill your ears as you slip a coin into the slot, your fingers itching to take control of your favorite character - ryu.

as you focus on the game, your mind drifts to the idea of meeting spencer. would he really be as perfect for you as courtney says? The thought lingers in your mind a bit as you unleash a flurry of moves on the joystick, losing yourself in the focus.

as you're deeply engrossed in the game, spencer enters the bar, scanning the room for courtney. spotting her animatedly chatting with anna, he makes his way over, a small smile playing on his lips. courtney notices him approaching and waves him over eagerly.

"hey, spencer! glad you could make it," she greets him with enthusiasm, nudging anna to make space for him between them.

"hey, court, thanks for inviting me!" spencer replies, returning her smile. his eyes then wander around the bar, landing on you as you fiercely battle your way through the arcade game.

courtney follows his gaze and grins mischievously. "oh, hey, look who's here! it's the girl i've been telling you about," she says, motioning towards you.

spencer's interest piques, and he watches you play for a moment, impressed by your technique. he can't help but notice how focused you are, your determination evident in every move you make. with a newfound curiosity, he watches in awe as you skillfully defeat everyone you fight with ease.

“hey…” you whip your head around and stand up straight from your practically bent over pose, as you hear courtney’s voice from behind you.

there, stood next to her, is possibly the most attractive man you’d ever seen.

he’s got beautiful brown eyes, and dark curly hair. with glasses. oh my. he’s dressed in slacks, tattered old vans, a flannel, and an old work jacket.

“um, hi court.” is all you can muster up to say to her.

“this is spencer, spencer this is the woman of your dreams!” she giggles.

spencer glares at her, but then smiles sincerely at you.

“so, street fighter, huh? you've got some serious skills," spencer remarked, impressed by your gameplay.

you glanced over at him, offering a small smile in return. "thanks! it's one of my favorite games. i've been playing since i was a kid. i think it’s one of the main reasons i decided to be a game developer."

courtney takes this opportunity to slip away from you both, leaving you to geek out together, and she rushes over to anna

“i told you! twenty bucks says they leave together!” she grins.

“you are so on!” anna replies.

across the bar, you and spencer are chatting it up, both leant against the wall near the machine.

spencer takes a sip of his drink before leaning in. "so, who's your main in street fighter?"

you grin, a rush of excitement at the chance to talk about your favorite character. "call me basic, but definitely ryu! i love his playstyle, and his hadoukens! they’re pretty gnarly."

"classic choice," spencer replied with a nod of approval. "i’m more of a ken guy myself. gotta respect the fiery spirit, you know?"

you giggle, nodding in agreement. "yeah, ken's cool. those shoryukens can really mess up the game though.”

he smiles at your reply, and the conversation flows on. you find yourself talking to him for the better part of an hour, eventually sitting at the bar with him.

“um, you don’t have to say yes,” he says, turning to you. “but, would you want to come back to my place?”

you smile at him, and tuck a strand of hair behind your ear “i’d like that.”

and so, you find yourself walking back to spencer’s apartment and talking to him about how much you love zelda.

stepping into his apartment, you’re immediately greeted by an array of nerdy decorations that cover every corner. posters of classic video game characters lined the walls, and shelves filled with action figures and memorabilia from various fandoms.

"wow, you have quite the collection!" you exclaimed, taking in the sight with wide eyes.

spencer chuckles nervously with a sheepish smile, scratching the back of his head. "yeah, i might have gone a little overboard."

but to you, it’s like stepping into a treasure trove of nostalgia, and honestly? you were jealous. you eagerly made your way around the room, pointing out your favorite pieces and telling him about the games and shows you loved most.

"that's a limited edition link figurine, right?" you ask, pointing to a display on one of the shelves.

spencer nodded, a hint of pride in his voice. "yeah, it's one of my prized possessions! i also have a few special edition zelda figures."

as you continue to explore, spencer watches you with a mixture of awe and admiration. he had never met someone who shared his passion for all things nerdy quite like you did. It felt surreal to have someone in his space who not only appreciated but genuinely enjoyed his interests.

before long, the initial awkwardness of the invitation fades away, replaced by a comfortable ease as you bond over your shared love for video games, movies, and everything in between.

the night continues, and you end up making him watch your favourite film - perfect blue, which you watch in comfortable silence.

as the credits roll, you stretch out comfortably on spencer's couch, feeling the pleasant weight of sleep pulling at your eyelids. the movie is intense, and you’re exhausted from the day's excitement.

spencer glances over at you, a soft smile playing on his lips as he noticed your drooping eyelids. he gently reached for the remote and turned off the playstation you were using to watch it, casting the room into a soothing darkness.

"you tired?" he asks, his voice low and gentle.

you nod sleepily, snuggling into the cushions. "yeah, it's been a long day. sorry for almost falling asleep on you."

spencer chuckles softly, shaking his head. "don't apologize. it's actually kind of nice having someone to watch movies with, even if they fall asleep halfway through."

you smile, feeling a warmth spread through your chest at his words. despite only meeting him tonight, you already feel a sense of comfort in his presence.

with a contented sigh, you let yourself drift off, the steady rhythm of spencer's heartbeat beneath you lulling you into a peaceful slumber.

later that night, as you sleep soundly against him, spencer can’t resist taking a picture of you, your peaceful expression illuminated by the soft glow of the tv’s ‘no signal’ screen. he texts it to courtney with a simple message: "she isn't too bad."

as he presses send, a smile tuggs at the corners of his lips.

courtney opens the message to see your face, her jaw dropping. she closes the messages from spencer, and immediatley texts anna,

‘u owe me 20 ;)’

[rei-ismyname]

Uncanny X-Men #8 review - Raid on Graymalkin finale

Raid on Graymalkin has been a strange event in a lot of ways. It happened very early after an editorial and creative team change, it's only four issues spread over 2 books, and perhaps most of all, editorial both spoiled the ending and hyped up an ideological divide between Rogue and Cyclops. The big question is 'was the hype paid off?' Sadly, no - Uncanny #8 doesn't so much land the plane as crash it into a mountain. A plane crash can be a spectacle though, let's break it down. At the very least it looks great. This is a long one, so strap in.

We get to know Scurvy a little better.

X-Men #9 ended with both teams in Scurvy/ Philip's psychic thrall and Charles Xavier taking the stage after Kurt and Kwannon freed him. Uncanny #8 opens with his POV of his recent history, showing a 'Not All Mutants' mutant and how he ended up in an abusive relationship with a right wing podcast host. Well, it shows how they met, how his powers work, and how Warden Ellis has used him.

His powers aging him drastically explains why he's reluctant to go all out and perhaps how his powers helped an Infowars knock off to get this job. YMMV on whether this makes him sympathetic; it's certainly a 180 from the plain pathetic he has been portrayed as thus far. We spend a lot of time with him this issue, but it's all so vague I don't feel like we actually know all that much about him. He is portrayed as a victim, though he's also in the process of frying our heroes' brains and enslaving people. On the other hand, we get so little of his motivations and feelings that there's not much there. Villains/antagonists need to be developed to be interesting, and I'm not sure if Scurvy is a victim of Ellis' crusade or a self hating mutant who gave 'everything to a dream' for ... reasons. He's literally killing himself and it'd be good to know why.

Scurvy has been hyped as a Psychic on par with Xavier, something Xavier himself hasn't exactly confirmed but he has admitted Scurvy is an obstacle. They haven't met but Scurvy's been aware of Xavier, presumably because he's world famous and announced Krakoa to everyone on the planet. Scurvy suggests it's more than that - he and Charles are part of a group of five mutants called Avians, one of whom died - Harvey X. Chuck has had an oversized presence in Simone's Uncanny X-Men and another vague mystery about him takes up space that could be used to develop other characters - The Outliers, Jubilee, Nightcrawler. This 'Avian' business feels like The Twelve and other similar half baked plots, and how can Charles have a tumour if he's in a relatively new body? He died last in Inferno AFAIK, but more than that it feels unnecessary. I'm not invested in believing or disbelieving it, though Chuck dying might make X-Manhunt more interesting.

Chuck isn't showing up again until March, and Scurvy ages 10 years during this issue. Why are we spending all this time on these people that aren't main characters? Does Xavier really need to be part of some special unexplained group? He's been a very special and prominent part of the X-Men since 1963 - new old girlfriends and vague hints of specialness feel like mystery box overkill. Maybe Scurvy is lying as part of their psychic battle. Laws of narrative economy suggest otherwise, but either way - what's the point? Also, Avians? Are they birds? Maybe it's a Shi'Ar thing but right now it sounds ridiculous. Avians 🙄

Juggernaut knocks Rogue out of Scurvy's control and she thinks she has time to do the same to one other person. She apologises to Gambit for not choosing him and picks Cyke as the tactical choice, nearly knocking his head off. He snaps out of it too and shit gets bizarre.

For some reason Scott chooses this moment to berate Rogue for 'bringing kids into a war zone' which is a super valid point but I find it difficult to believe he'd bring it up while they're on the back foot and threats are everywhere. Rogue's answer is even more puzzling. I can believe she'd make an appeal to emotion but it's not a real answer. 'At least we don't have Magneto on our team' is not a rebuttal to nearly getting children killed, but it also does not make sense.

Magneto has been reformed for YEARS at this point and was a driving force behind Krakoa. She's saying like he's some irredeemable villain when he's the most heroic he's ever been. He and Rogue had zero interaction on Krakoa, where he was considered a national hero and famously was very tight with her hero Xavier. If she has an issue with the sins that came to light after Inferno, then she wouldn't be so charitable to Chuck, either. Maybe it's Scurvy's influence, but if so then what's the point? This isn't ideology, it's dodging the question at worst or petty bickering at best. Has Rogue forgotten her extensive history with Magneto, or her own start as a villain? What about her husband's involvement in the Mutant Massacre or her parents' unrepentant villainy? When considered in the context of Simone saying that Rogue and Cyclops would occupy the Xavier/Magneto relationship it looks like a missed shot. You'd have to ignore decades of history to make it work. Sigh, this was an unforced error and it really bums me out.

'I'm never going to be you and you're never going to be Professor X' is flat out weird. Cyclops answer of 'good' is consistent with his argument last issue, but it makes it look like they're not having the same conversation. Finally they realise they're in a war zone and only now does Rogue defer to Cyclops. Oookayyy. They say 'Magik and Wolverine' together in a moment that's both cheesy as hell and should underline their commonalities. I'm almost feel bad ragging on this, but it's not executed well. At least Rogue is consistently characterised as a cowboy. That's something.

Magik and Wolverine start freeing people then stop to agree not to kill each other. Deathdream says weird stuff, as usual, and the two make up. Jitter has her second instance of love heart emoji'ing a woman, which is cute but still deniable as actual WLW representation. I hope Simone cashes this cheque.

Queerness should be something that's not notable in a perfect world, just a part of the character. We don't live in a perfect world though, and we don't know a lot about Jitter. We know her powers, that she's Malay Singaporean, that she has a stutter, and that she possibly likes women. It's not enough for issue #8 of the flagship series. The choice was made to heavily focus on Xavier and Sarah Gaunt, and a casualty of that was getting to know main characters. It wouldn't be such a big deal if the payoff was worth it, but what did we actually learn? Instead of giving readers a break from Charles Xavier, he's been a regular presence. His appearance in this event could have been more impactful but I feel like we never had a chance to miss him.

Kwannon and Kurt reveal that Scurvy made them fight, which Rogue is aware of, and she adds that 'we're broken.' I'm not sure what that's supposed to mean, but this undermines the stakes of the ideological conflict. Is it manufactured or isn't it? None of them consider attacking Scurvy while he's fighting Xavier, either. Nobody is acting like they're in danger. It feels unserious, like the characters are just waiting for things to happen to them.

At this point I don't really care who Inmate X is. Uncanny X-Men has been dropping these mystery boxes that readers can only guess at, and like with Harvey X being the one pulling strings, it comes out of nowhere. It's another Avian, which means nothing to us beyond a vague implication of specialness. We know that Ellis considers it a bad thing if he get out of his cell, but that doesn't narrow it down aside from it being a he.

Aw, cripes - popular gen Z saying

Interestingly, Xavier's astral form is that of his Cerebro-helmeted onesie twink. It could reveal that he hasn't changed at all in how he sees himself and his role as shepherd of mutantkind. It's very different from his classic astral battle appearance, and I love it thematically and visually. Scurvy and Chuck as astral giants towering over the schoolprison is striking, though the casualness of their dialogue mutes it somewhat.

Not sure how Ezra or Ellis can tell Scurvy is losing a battle on the astral plane, but she does what she should have done before this and gets a gun. Calico is overjoyed that the Outliers (except Jitter) came for her, but what could be a heartwarming moment is undercut by their dulled expressions. I can buy Deathdream doing this, but Ransom has been emotionally aware prior to this. We have zero details, but aren't these kids tight after months of being on the run together?

It's finally time to stop standing around, as Ellis and guards are here with guns. The X-Men, having already beat up plenty of these dudes, aren't impressed. They stand together (no idea where Chuck and Scurvy got to) and Cyke urges her to stand down, pointing out that they're not as nice as the Avengers. Rogue agrees in the shittiest way possible, thinking 'sometimes visor boy says jus the right thing.' Weird ableist stance from Rogue, but all it does is highlight how shallow their conflict is and remind us that Gail Simone doesn't like Cyclops.

Ellis doesn't blink, telling them her 'brother died because of trash like you.' We knew this already, and I'm wondering if there's anything else to her. She's established as a threat but she's not especially interesting. She helped with Sarah Gaunt out of empathy (?) but here she is flinging the same old slurs. I'm not sure if her dark skin is meant to be noteworthy or say anything. So far it hasn't been a part of her character in any way other than visual, no commentary on how someone who has experienced minority oppression becomes so hell-bent on dealing it out herself. How does a person become willing to enslave and torture, and even (as we'll see) destroy two towns with thousands of humans in them? Her brother died, sure, but that's thin characterisation for a multi-arc villain.

Chuck wallops Scurvy with an uppercut!

Ellis brings out The Trustees again (who the X-Men easily defeated) to have Blob recite 'the pledge.' Very messed up but it shouldn't exactly convince the X-Men to do anything other than smash this place to pieces. She threatens to let Sarah Gaunt loose from her comically large chains that shouldn't stop her for a second.

Cyclops points out that with Scurvy's defeat Ellis' big gun is down. She laughs at that, and for some reason Chuck doesn't immediately take over her brain. Her big gun is more literal - a fucking network of sonic cannon satellites. Who TF gave this lady a Death Star? She has Merle and Haven targeted but Rogue thinks she's bluffing. Logically, you'd think so. Would the US government really accept this maniac destroying towns with a space laser? Not sure how they'd spin that. Also, neither team have any leverage to stop her using it whenever she wants. I feel like she's forcing them to kill her right here and now, lest their strategic position becomes 'able to be killed at any time without effort.' They could even just send her on permanent vacation to Limbo, see how her bullshit flies with Maddie Pryor.

Ellis lets them take the people they came for (why?) but that's not enough for Rogue. Siryn speaks to Rogue personally while crying, indicating she's herself, as much as she can be with all the torture, mind control, and who knows what else? It's only when Xavier intercedes that Rogue listens.

Charles explains why he needs to be in prison (though we know he'll change his mind and escape in March) and they have an emotional exchange. It works, I guess, but Rogue looks super selfish and ignorant. Free Charles for personal reasons when he doesn't want it at the cost of two towns? Doesn't seem like much of a choice (other than knocking Ellis out while she's in your face.) It feels a bit regressive for Rogue, too. She is aware of everything from Fall of X (including Chuck manipulating one of her mothers and trying to permanently kill the other) and hadn't really had or needed a mentor in a long time. Sure, everyone is lost after Krakoa, but WTF is she so attached to Xavier? It's great that he was the first to believe in her but this feels almost infantilising. Rogue is better than this.

Scott has Magik open a big portal before 'she' can stop you. I assume 'she' refers to Rogue, except Rogue is shown willingly walking through it with everyone else. Ellis wasn't interested in stopping them. It's like everyone has the script and realises the event is over so it's time to go. I have difficulty believing any of these characters would just meekly leave, not because of Xavier, but the multiple sonic space cannons that can kill them anytime plus their enslaved comrades. There's eight regular ass humans with guns in the way and this is their shot to do anything about it. How many of these X-Men could take them all out by themselves? Cyke could optic blast them unconscious, Magik has multiple methods, and many of the others could just punch them while ignoring bullets.

Yo, where's Quentin? He arrived with you guys.

Once Rogue has walked through the portal (clearly willingly and without duress) she objects again - 'no. We can't leave him there!' Cyke echoes Charles' own words and promises to get the others out, but Rogue punches him maybe ten feet and not only repudiates Scott's promises (?) but places the blame entirely on him. He blasts her and tells her to grow up (kinda fair) but then their teammates hold them back. Beast tells Scott he won, but this looks like a narrative trick to pretend Cyclops wanted to fight or has any reason to.

Rogue turns to leave with mild venom and her team follows. Hank assures Scott that he had no choice and Scott disagrees but doesn't elaborate. I hate to see X-Men fight but it's even worse when it's over nothing. The post-portal events feel like Simone going 'hmm, didn't really sell that ideological divide or their falling out, fuck it, just have Rogue punch Cyclops.' I think Cyclops was mostly right here, but it's more than Rogue was wrong and the conflict was contrived. I just don't buy the degree of animosity Rogue has and all the reasons given feel out of character. If that's who Rogue is right now I can accept it, but it's not very heroic and she's had multiple egregious failures of leadership. If this is identified as a character flaw that needs working on or a mistake that she regrets it could make for interesting storytelling, but all the information we have suggests that's not the case. Uncanny is frankly a trainwreck, but at least it looks fantastic. The letters page and other media suggests a lot of people are enjoying this book, and I couldn't be happier for them. I just wish I was too. I'll keep reviewing it of course, and I'll be less harsh than this review was. It was hyped and it called shots and didn't deliver. Doing that sets expectations and gives me another metric to judge it by. Hopefully we can get on with learning about the characters who've been neglected.

As for Raid on Graymalkin as an event, it had its ups and downs. Most of the ups were in X-Men and most of the downs were in Uncanny. Ultimately it didn't fulfill the promise it made so I judge it as a failure. We didn't learn a great deal and it boiled down to a cynical excuse for X-Men to punch each other. The mysteries it introduced feel dull to me and I am not especially interested in the Avians or Inmate X. The solicits for X-Manhunt spoiled that Xavier wasn't going anywhere, which left us with forced conflict. I'm far more interested in the aftermath of the event, especially the Alaska team dealing with a visit from the O*N*E. They don't really need much reason to fuck with the X-Men so I'm not crediting the event with that.

Thanks for reading!

[bokettochild]

Links Meet Zeldas AU

4 am brain is 4 am brain-ing

I had an idea, and yes, that's probably not the best of things for me to be doing, but this head never stops spinning in all honesty.

Anyways! Remember how JoJo said (in the podcast) that we're doubling the cast eventually? Well, ever since that, I've had this vague notion that it would be fun to write a fic featuring all the Links and Zeldas meeting. Except, you know, for the part where that's ten whole new characters to familiarize myself with, and trying to work out all the dynamics at once with that many characters would be a nightmare.

But then it hit me: they don't have to be all at once!

Hear me out!

A major battle with the shadow, the boys are beaten down and bloody, but still pressing on. The shadow is also weakened in some way, it's not got that much longer, and while nobody's really winning, it is coming very close to losing. So, it creates a portal, jumping through.

The boys follow.

FSA style, none of them end up in the same location, but rather, scattered to the Four Winds (so to speak) in different eras of Hyrule, but none of them in their own. Shenanigans ensue as they try to either a.) fine their way home, b.) find the chain, or c.) find the shadow and defeat it. Over the course of said shenanigans, they each run into the Zelda(s) of that era, whom then decide to join them to get them home and help defeat the evil.

What's really fun to me about this idea though is that it gives me a chance to indulge in my "downfall princesses are badasses" hc. You all know I adore Scary Fable, but Feral-Cat Dawn also has a special place in my heart. Imagining the other heroes meeting a downfall princess for the first time is pure gold to me, especially without her respective hero there to explain why she's Like That, or help in some way.

Just- a fic focusing on random pairings of Links and Zeldas all trying to find each other across space and time.

And what solidified it for me? The name flying into my head

"How I Met Your Princess"

Yes, I'm hilarious, feel free to applaud LOL

[neodotexe]

I've been seeing a lot of those "guess which event isn't canon" polls so I'm doing one for my current hyperfixation

feel free to rb for a bigger sample size

[novelconcepts]

It has taken me seven days to run a marathon. Seven days to pound out a little over 26 miles. Seven days in which I coax my body into motion despite my perpetual fatigue, despite my aching chest, despite the fact that my brain is on fire what feels like three-hundred percent of the time.

There was a time when the idea of running 26 miles in any number of days was laughable. Beyond laughable; it was a concept so nonexistent, I did not know how to dream it up. I did not grow up a runner. I grew up with a stellar baseball swing, a killer capacity for sinking free throws, and a vomitous terror of being seen by any kind of audience during a game. I grew up a graceless, sports-focused tomboy. I grew up terrified of embarrassing myself via athletic feats. I talked myself out of almost every game I could have excelled at. I talked myself out of so much.

I picked up running a few years ago just to see if I could. To see if it was in me, despite my breathlessness on flights of stairs, despite convincing myself at age twelve that I had a bum knee. I picked up running a few years ago to see if I could, in the comfort of my own living room, squirming out of binders and into sports bras and feeling a little bit insane all the while. I kept up running anyway. Even though my personal best was seven minutes. Even though a mile felt like drop-kicking my own sternum off a mountain. Even though my body felt wrong with every step, because--let's all be honest now--my body had felt wrong since I hit puberty.

I kept up running in the privacy of my own living room, and then the privacy of my home office. Wherever I could fit a treadmill. I kept it up because I'd already told people I'd started, and I have a propensity for stubbornness. If people know, I can't give up, or I will be a failure. The potential for shame kept me driving forward. I kept it up, and, slowly, I began to dream about it. I dream of running the way other people dream of flying. In my dreams, I am weightless. I do not even have a body with which to battle. My lungs know how to do nothing but breathe easy. My legs could carry me across oceans. I run, and I run, and I am running not away from anything, not towards anything. I am just running. Humans are like that. Humans are supposed to be like that. We move because moving is innate, because momentum is beautiful, because in motion, we are alive.

I kept up running in private, and then, in 2022, I had top surgery. I couldn't run for months. I had to heal. I had to relearn the angles of a body I had been at war with for over half my life. I spent weeks in bed, my brain foggy, my depression worsening not because I regretted my decision to get the surgery--I have never regretted anything less than that surgery--but because I had taken off the table one of the biggest obstacles to my own joy. My body was more my own than it had ever been, and I was...still unwell. Still very much not okay. I laid in bed, and I listened to audiobooks, and I rewatched my favorite shows, and I ached to fill the spaces in myself with something joyful. Something as positive as the miracle I'd just enacted on my own body. I healed slowly. I accepted needing medication for my depression. I returned to running.

I ran outside for the first time in my life. I ran outside, and everything I'd already learned, I had to navigate through fresh eyes. The upheaval of sidewalks that twist and turn, that slope unexpectedly upward before sending you skidding downhill again. The presence of other runners, of dog-walkers, of cars and children and unexpected rainfall. I began listening to podcasts. I listened to podcasts about queer joy. I listened to podcasts about movies worthy of love and hate simultaneously. I listened to podcasts that made me laugh, and stories that made my chest feel like it would cave in. Sometimes, I listened to music, and I wrote a soundtrack for a revolutionary kind of cinema in which I, at last, played the lead. I ran, and I learned how to breathe through my new chest, and I learned how to straighten my spine and twist my hips and feel, for once, as though the body I inhabit is one that wants me around.

I run now, in the summer, mainly in my office again, because climate change is a bitch. I run shirtless, watching my reflection out of the corner of my eye in my cabinets. I am still not in love with my body. There is too much about it that feels outside of my control. I am even less in love with my brain, which--despite the exercise, despite the Lexapro, despite the happy home life and loving community I am fortunate enough to have around me--wants me dead more than ever. I run largely because I am trying to outrun the negatives. The anxiety burning a pit in my stomach. The self-loathing I can't switch off. The fear of the future. The burden of observation in a world where every bit of bad news is available at all times. I run as though I am trying to escape a tiger, and I know it can't get through my front door, but I can sense its teeth in my neck all the same. I run two miles. Three. Five. Six. I run, and I keep track of my running, because every mile is another day I've won the war.

I am not well. I am not okay. I know this. I say this to my wife in tears. I say this to myself in stoic, flat tones. I say this, and I feel my mouth shape in a crooked smile, and it is not funny--but I sometimes laugh, anyway. Sometimes, you have to. That's human, too. The momentum. The graveside humor. The miles scorched into the soles of shoes you must, someday, replace if you're going to keep going. I am not well. I am not okay. I did not, quite honestly, expect to make it this far. Thirty-five is a country unexplored. Thirty-five is a galaxy I've only just found the keys to. Sometimes, I think this will be the last year of my life--but then, I think I thought that last year. And the year before. In 2020, in 2016, when I was 19 and 17 and 12.

I've run a marathon in seven days.

Time to look ahead to the next seven.

[wtslpod]

We were immediately fans of Arondir, played by the incomparable Ismael Cruz Córdova.

“It is believed that one of the Valar watches over growing things and those who tend them.” Arondir spoke this line before the Battle of the Southlands, a clear reference to Yavanna, the Giver of Fruits. It’s also a pretty good summary of Arondir himself and his role in the narrative — a grower turned reluctant soldier who nevertheless uses his skills in warfare to protect those who cannot protect themselves.

We know that Arondir and Theo will meet up with the Ents, and that Arondir will eventually end up on the battlefield in Eregion, facing off against the mountain troll Damrod. Does Arondir have a greater mission to uphold for Yavanna? How will his legacy play out across the Second Age and into the Third? Will he gain a promotion from the High King Gil-Galad? One of our theories is that he will end up founding Imladris (Rivendell) beside Elrond, and carry Bronwyn’s legacy to the healing gardens there.

Whatever happens, we’re so excited to see our favorite elf back on screen! For more Arondir content, check out the podcast.

About the pod: Where the Shadows Lie is a Rings of Power fan podcast with Kat and Wren. Join us as we prepare to go wild about Season 2, dive into all of our favorite character arcs, speculate about twists, and celebrate the amazing cast and crew. Catch up on our Season 1 episodes or dive into our Season 2 spec, and tune in when Season 2 premieres on August 29th for weekly episode recaps and discussion. This is a positive, analytical space for fellow Rings of Power fans – all are welcome!

Find us on buzzsprout or your podcatcher of choice.

twitter│instagram│wtslpod@gmail.com

[sshbpodcast]

Episode 152: Everyone's Fighting Always

DS9: "Battle Lines" and "The Storyteller"

DS9 left us in the lurch this week, with two different episodes about conflict resolution of varying quality. First up: an eternal war is being fought by the biggest idiots in the Gamma Quadrant in "Battle Lines". After that, the Chief is dragged into a centuries-old rite to keep a monster at bay while, back on the station, Jake & Nog woo a young ruler as she tries to do right by her people.

Also this week: how many episodes can we compare "Battle Lines" to? What the devil is wrong with Bajor? How successfully can we waffle when we run out of things to say?

Content warning: discussion of rape as a trope in mythology.

Timestamps: Battle Lines: 01:36; The Storyteller: 21:52

[featherbow]

Please note that these broadcasts are only scheduled for the times listed below.

THE RE-SLAYER’S TAKE

Follow the escapades of the second-coolest monster hunters this side of Exandria: The Re-Slayer’s Take! After six misfit mercenaries are rejected from the elite monster hunting group, The Slayer’s Take, they band together battling supernatural creatures across the rugged continent of Issylra.

Episode 3 releases Monday, June 3rd on your favorite podcast streaming service at 5am Pacific

Episodes 5 releases Monday, June 3rd at 5am Pacific only on Beacon

CANDELA OBSCURA COOLDOWN | CANDELA OBSCURA LIVE | THE CIRCLE OF THE SILVER SCREEN

Join Spenser Starke, Matthew Mercer, Khary Payton, Marisha Ray, Laura Bailey, and Taliesin Jaffe as they discuss the events of their LIVE Candela Obscura One-Shot after the show.

Releases Monday, June 3rd at 12pm Pacific only on Beacon 

CRITICAL ROLE ABRIDGED

All the twists and turns of an episode of Critical Role in half the time! In Critical Role Abridged, the rich tapestry of a Critical Role campaign is lovingly distilled to its most pivotal, hilarious, and poignant moments in about 60-90 minutes per episode. 

Campaign 3, Episode 7 releases Tuesday, June 4th at 10am Pacific on YouTube

Campaign 3, Episode 20 releases Tuesday, June 4th at 10am Pacific on Beacon

Campaign 3, Episode 21 releases Friday, June 7th at 10am Pacific on Beacon

4-SIDED DIVE, EPISODE 24

Discussing Up to Campaign 3, Episode 96

Join Robbie Daymond, Laura Bailey, Marisha Ray, and Matthew Mercer as they discuss the return of Dorian Storm, the current state of the group, and the continuous moon nonsense still afoot! They’ll, of course, also pull questions from the Tower of Inquiry and play a very “relaxing” game called WE’RE DOOMED!

Airs Tuesday, June 4th at 7pm Pacific on Twitch and YouTube

VOD and Podcast out Tuesday, June 4th at 7pm Pacific on Beacon 

VOD out Wednesday, June 5th on YouTube at 12pm Pacific

Podcast out Tuesday, June 11th on your favorite podcast streaming service 

MIDST: SEASON 3

Join our three mischievous and unreliable narrators as they spin a surreal, sci-fantasy, space-western tale about complicated antiheroes making bad decisions in a world on the edge of disaster.

Episode 17  releases Wednesday, June 5th on YouTube at 10am Pacific and your favorite podcast streaming service at 5am Pacific

Unreliable narrators can’t be expected to stick to a schedule??? Episode 19 (the series finale of Midst!) will release on June 12th for subscribers.

CRITICAL ROLE: CAMPAIGN 3, EPISODE 97

Bells Hells continue on their adventure…

Airs Thursday, June 6th at 7pm Pacific on Twitch and YouTube

VOD and Podcast out Thursday, June 6th at 7pm Pacific only on Beacon 

Rebroadcasts Friday, June 7th at 12am Pacific and 9am Pacific on Twitch

VOD out Monday, June 10th at 12pm Pacific on YouTube 

Podcast out June 13th on your favorite podcast streaming service at 5am Pacific

NOTE: There will not be a new episode of Critical Role on June 13th due to our Bells Hells Live Show on June 15th.

Instead, we will be airing a new installment of The Menagerie in a Daggerheart LIVE One-Shot!

CRITICAL COOLDOWN: CAMPAIGN 3, EPISODE 97

Get a backstage pass to Campaign 3, Episode 97! You’ll be right there at the table immediately after Matt says “Is it Thursday yet?”, experiencing the cast’s post-show reactions.

Releases Thursday, June 6th at 7pm Pacific only on Beacon 

[the-joker-of-musicals]

MUSICAL TUMBLRMAN BATTLE

hey there, it's me, marina @annabelle--cane. you've seen these brackets before, you know the drill, it's time to watch these bastards kill each other.

rules/guidelines:

I'm using "tumblrman"/"the jokner of musicals" because a lot of the characters iconic to this genre are minors and it wouldn't be appropriate for an adult (<- me) to call them sexymen, but it also wouldn't feel right to just leave them out. I think these terms carry most of the same energy while leaving out sexual connotations.

personally, I will be voting and selecting based on levels of iconicness and how hard a choke hold these characters had on me and my peers, not based on which characters I actually think are best or that I like the most. I know this guideline is completely unenforceable and people will just black out and vote for their blorbos, but if this gets a good turn out, maybe I'll do a "favorite/best/most musical character" tournament afterwards.

there are a few characters who are already guaranteed spots (jd, beetlejuice, the squip, etc.), but still feel free to submit any obvious choices, especially if you've got compelling propaganda.

there are a few characters I don't feel comfortable including, but I don't think people are likely to submit them and I think posting a list would invite discourse, so I'll just say that I leave it ultimately up to my discretion whether or not to dismiss certain nominations.

since I will be selecting characters based on how iconic I think they were/are, nominees will likely skew male, but submissions are also open to female and nonbinary characters. the jonkler of musicals can be any gender.

similarly, I'm going to prioritize characters from stage musicals, but you may also submit characters from movie, TV, podcast, song cycle, or other medium musicals. if you're unsure, just go ahead and submit them and I'll figure it out.

this is a CRINGE POSITIVE space. ribbing on your past self or 2017 musical fandom culture as a whole is all fine and good, but try to keep in the spirit of friendly competition and stay away from being outright mean. if what you're saying is indistinguishable from a homophobe talking about their high school gsa, I will block you and delete your comments.

@ this blog or use the tag "tjom bracket" in your commentary about this tournament and I might rb your post here

I'm aiming for 32 characters in the first round, but I'm willing to be flexible.

inspiration from: @bestmusicalworldcup @bracketsoffear @problemgirlbracket @character-of-all-time @blorbopoll2 @powerpolyculeshowdown @ultimate-tragic-couples-showdown

OKAY. SUBMIT YOUR MUSICAL JOKSTNERS. FORM OPEN UNTIL 12:00 AM MONDAY EST.

[softness-and-shattering]

The thing about watching a show like Scavengers Reign is the inevitable question of how well I would fare in a similar scenario. The usual answer, Id probably not survive a week.

Except if I was in a pod on the ship, or Id landed like Azi with supplies that happened to include plenty of necessary medication and such. Id like that kind of story. Someone who thinks ahead for emergencies or grabs the right box on the way out. Because we're not all chemists or mechanics or programming whizzes, yknow? Its a fun power fantasy, the disabled person with all the skills to manage on their own. Some people could manage. I do have a friend who genuinely knows everything there is to know about wheelchairs, those people do exist, theyre just not most of us. Most of us dont survive apocalyptic scenarios or even sufficiently distant time travel.

Which is also why any political grand revolution you come up with has to include us. No abrupt cutting off of the supply chain, no pandemonium in the streets because if you have to leave all the disabled people to die then your revolution isnt worth shit.

I think those are stories worth telling, of how disabled people do manage in catastrophes and not as a side character to show how generous someone else is and not as a total genius of exactly their disability. Like of course we're interested and that helps but that doesnt mean we can be isekai'd back to 1200 and come up with penicillin, yknow? Or immunosupressants or heart medication or insulin.

There is, whats her name, Raven, from The 100? She injures her leg fairly early on. I cant really think of many others. Do reccomend me any you think of.

(Also a superpower that makes the disability not disabling doesnt really count either. If they bust their spine and five minutes later have a full replacement tech body that they never think about and is always fully functional *mcu war machine* that also doesnt count. The aesthetic prosthetic limb only counts if the character is still disabled - Ill count Yang from RWBY because she actually has a whole season to process and she can lose the arm and it does cause trouble. If someone w experience of prosthetics wants to disagree w me thats fine.

Which reminds me of Alita Battle Angel, which I found so bizarre, in a culture of treating people as walking parts, the guy gives his daughter priceless porcelain. Like. Did you not think people would kill her for it?? Anyway this has been a fun tangent.)

Mm and Id also like to see space travel where, like with scavengers reign they can breathe the air, but not perfectly. Like maybe theres not quite enough oxygen so everyones always a little dizzy and a little not quite thinking clearly. Totally surviveable biologically but everyones just a little disabled. Or gravity is stronger and long term bad for their bones, or much lighter and if they get back to somewhere safe they srruggle to readjust. People born on colony worlds adapted for generations to their specific conditions getting on a spaceship, spaceship politics about what temperature and gravity is standard (oooh the uh. Wayfarers by Becky Chambers does cool shit with this actually, with various aliens rather than humanoids but still super fun. Theres this one species that doesnt breathe oxygen at all and they need spacesuits to be around everyone else. Dont remember what they do breathe. Very space-Jews, love them). I get why youd choose for your setting to have breathable air, thats a difficult resource, its just at the edge of believability for me.

Edit: theres also Jeeter with lung issues from starship iris, a canon space Jew :D. And I think one of them was on antidepressants? Such a good show. Podcast.