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sedonalace · 7 years ago

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a dream is just a dream until it becomes all too real

This is another mess that I made I guess. yeah, that’s all I’m gonna say about that. just here to say I hope you all have a great day and I hope this doesn’t seem too confusing that’s all lmao.

Also, follow me on twitter @ mirisxoxo bc self-promo, I have no shame and I am very bored.

❤ ❤ ❤

This doesn't seem too out of the ordinary for him. Although he usually never dreams about it, it makes sense that it appears right now because of the last competition he was in. And although he won, all of the hours of skating practice, day and night, almost 8 hours a day consecutively at times. It might have caught up all at once. And now skating was invading his paradise escape.

Matteo was in the park, just doing a few tricks for a bit. Drawing in a small crowd of people walking by. After that short sequence ended, he decided to venture off on his own to roam around in the fresh air. It was something he never got to do too often. But it was a dream, even if he didn't know it. Literally, there were no bounds as to what could happen in a dream. It's an odd thing to think about.

Along the way, he sees a girl in the distance. Way too far out to even be noticed by the other. But she was the only other one in the park that was skating as well. The thing is though, she looked very out of place though, not necessarily in the bad way.

She wore these brightly colored clothes that could be seen from space, with the neons so blinding. Also the fact that she wore a tank top and short shorts, even though it was getting pretty chilly in Buenos Aires as Autumn quickly approached. As if she just walked straight off a beach.

This may be due to the fact that she seemed so young, youthful even. Very petite. Despite these things, this isn't what even stood out the most to Matteo. Her hair was so dark and long. It very much imitated waves washing over her shoulders delicately. So soft and calming. She stumbled a bit from point to point. But ultimately, would get back up right away and carry on.

He didn't choose his favorite standout point, however, until she noticed him.

As he watched her in the distance, her mostly back-facing side view turned the slightest bit to see behind her. When she spotted someone staring, she made a stop and completely turned around, where they were facing one another eye for eye. In those stares, there was such a strong feeling, so hard to describe. Something like it want to pull closer to her. However, he stayed put letting everything sink in.

Her eyes recognized every inch of him from her standpoint. And as she pierced her green eyes through his, her lips turned up the tiniest bit, moving slowly up. Into the form of a complete grin.

She smiled. She smiled. She smiled.

And then it shut down.

~~~~~

Matteo opened his eyes, shaken up. Returned back to his room, lying comfortably in his bed, in the early hours of the morning with the orange rising sun peeking through the blinds, making a painting on the walls. He rubbed the sleep out of his eyes as best as he could before reaching for his phone. 6:34 A.M. it read. With only 23% battery left, having a crappy broken phone charger, and not having the time to buy a new one. He groaned into his pillow not only because he has to be at the university in 45 minutes or that he'll have a mostly dead phone throughout the day, but because of the dream. This weird, unexpected, and destructive dream. It really came out of nowhere. The strangest it's been in a while.

He can only hope that nothing comes of it, and he can get through this already rough day without setting anything else off.

•

This one doesn't seem so far off from most of his dreams. Singing in front of a crowd is always the goal he chases after. Most of the time it takes place in the places impossible to get to, like Madison Square Garden or the Rose Bowl or something like that and with a big band behind him and colorful lights all around.

Except here, he's in the Jam and Roller during another Open Music. He wakes up from his drifted off state and realizes he is in the dressing room, waiting to go up. He recognizes voices and turns around to find Jim and Yam at the vanity fighting over which lip color to go with. And Ramiro trying to get them to shut up. Luckily that part is already settled for them as they hear Juliana's voice announcing them to go up and they abandon their previous argument, leaving Matteo alone with his thoughts.

Matteo grabs his guitar that stood beside him on the rack and lightly strummed the strings for sound. Time has apparently vanished in a blink as he hears the sound of quiet clapping from outside and his name being called to go on stage. He takes a breath and goes up, passing by the three who went before him, too busy gushing over how well they think they did to even bother looking at him.

He sits on the stool and looks out. The atmosphere has changed tremendously for this one. He can barely see out into the crowd now. But he could tell it was a bit more thinned out. The tables looked prettier for some reason with some fancy tables clothes and flowers in pretty arrangements. And several candles placed on the tables to emit the room with dimmed lights. It was a very romantic scenery he just wasn't used to seeing at Jam and Roller where everything is full of fun and color and pop.

As he randomly starts playing apparently a song he doesn't recall even writing, as he has no control over this dream, he looks into this crowd and he doesn't recognize a face. None of his friends or classmates or Ambar, or even the regular spectators who come to these things. They were new faces who he couldn't even distinguish. That is until he looks at the very last table at the corner of the room in the far, far back. It's the girl from the other dream. Sitting with the candle illuminating her face just enough that he could distinguish who she was.

He almost felt himself stop playing not being able to believe it. He couldn't figure out how the hell she could appear again. It did make sense that it actually is possible to have someone or something to appear more than once. But it was never really believable. Not in this much detail, or in such a pattern in his best settings. But she was there, her smile growing bigger the more he played. Her cheeks growing pinker, and her hair falling more often in her face as a chance to tuck it away in that soft and shy way that he deemed charming. And that made him smile too.

As he finished singing the last lyrics, strumming the last chords hearing it fade away, his attention was only focused on her. Staring intently at one another, feeling her eyes burn into him again. And when it was over, it all went black.

~~~~~

Matteo woke up in a frenzy, hitting his head on something very hard. He was at his desk in his room, with open textbooks and papers all around him, had fallen asleep very late in the night from studying.

He rubbed his head and tried to blink the sleep away from his eyes. He saw the girl again in his dream he remembered, which was very odd. He had never seen her in his life before, never knew her name or anything. But he remembered her and had no idea why. Everything was so unexplainable. Maybe its been the past few weeks of his strenuous schedule. Between the competitions and recovery, studying for finals, or whatever. Maybe it all just caught up to him and this was the result he thought.

He checked his phone for the time. It was 11 A.M. Very late to be waking up on his terms, but it was Saturday and he didn't have any plans for the day so it was sort of acceptable. However, there were millions of texts it seemed from Ambar. Checking up on him, asking about finals, checking for vacation preparations, asking to see if he was even alive. And then finally her giving up on him. He groaned as he laid his head back on the desk again, his head pounding from all the thoughts.

Deciding to just go back to sleep for a few minutes to avoid dealing with his life problems and hopefully to forget these imaginations or whatever was happening to him.

•

He's back in the dressing room again, except there's no Jim or Yam or Ramiro there. Just him by himself. There doesn't seem to be anyone outside of the room either he thinks. He can't tell if he's reliving the same dream over again. He found himself but in the same place. It's never happened before.

Matteo rules out that he's alone when he hears music starting up coming from the stage. He turns around confused and peaks through the side curtain wing. The girl starring in his most recent dreams center stage with a microphone in hand, swallowing herself in the light and music playing. No one is in the crowd as he suspected, but she continues to float in her own presence, as the beginning of the song plays on.

The girl starts to sing, a song unfamiliar to Matteo once before, but now he's capturing every lyric in his brain to not let it pass by him. Her voice sounds so delicate and fragile, but carries a powerful weight of the lyrics, giving them such emphasis with a feathery feeling, is the only way he could describe it. Her voice was mesmerizing, she was mesmerizing.

For all of this time, she hadn't noticed Matteo standing off to the side. But once she did, her eyes somehow glowed for a second into an even brighter iridescent green, as if she was an enchantress casting a spell.

Her free hand raises a bit and motions for him to step closer to her while continuing to sing. He hesitates at first, but when she keeps suggesting it, he slowly walks over to her. She keeps nodding more excitedly as she lets him come even closer to her. There he is only a foot away in distance.

Finally, he is able to see every essence, every feature, every detail of her face. He notices that her cheekbones are very high and prominent as she smiles. They become a very rosy color as they look at one another. The curve of her nose, the color of her lips, the dark and long length of her lashes. And he knew that her eyes were a beautiful and incredible green, but from up close the purity of them took his breath away, but he refused to look anywhere else besides her eyes. And he was hook, line, and sinkered right into them.

There was a feeling in the air about the song almost coming to an end. This one enthralling song with her voice that he just couldn't seem to get over. But he felt the build up as she sings to him so magically. Her hand starts reaching over to his. And so they touch.

Her fingers gracefully sliding up to his in this very soft pattern that seems so real and chilling. And his fingers naturally come apart, allowing hers to fit through his, and they interlace as if they were made to fit into one another. He beams at their hands and back to her as she sings the last notes, returning the smile in an even wider gesture.

And the last note plays, making everything go back to reality once more.

~~~~~

Matteo feels his shoulders being shaken a little too violently as he is waking up in a shock. He finds himself on an airplane, first class to be exact. With his girlfriend Ambar having seemed to be the one with a bit of a harsh wake-up.

"Babe, babe," she pesters softly as he grumbles a bit slowly trying to wake back up. "What?" he manages to mumble a bit frustrated, then proceeding to yawn. "We're almost in Cancun so you should get ready, I guess," she whispers, trying to avoid awakening any of the other passengers. He nods a bit while shrugging. He's in an airplane, how is he really supposed to get ready? Or maybe she meant that in a different context he guesses.

Instead, he just rests his head on Ambar's shoulder, who seems uncomfortable with it at first, but lets him rest there for the remaining minutes of their flight.

As they are waiting in the baggage claim after their flight, Matteo sees something. He swears that he sees her. He's 99.9% sure it's his own imagination coming up with this imagery, but he swears he sees her in the distance of the airport, walking off into a hall, with such familiar dark long locks swishing behind her. He blinks a few times trying to regain any sense of functionality.

Maybe it was just another girl he thought. There are millions of young girls out there with dark long hair like hers. And there's probably like 30 at least in this extremely busy airport today. And he didn't even get a good look at her face. The hair was mostly the thing he saw. So he has no solid evidence for this.

And that's what he convinces himself. He doesn't go any further than that. He just does his best at forgetting it as he helps get Ambar's suitcases off of the conveyor belt and carries them outside trailing behind her and leaving them with the chauffeur to put them in the trunk.

While they drive off in their limo, Ambar checking for new messages on her phone, Matteo sits completely still, not moving a single muscle. Every time it's getting weirder and weirder and all of this is becoming way too realistic he doesn't even see them as dreams. There's no way he could be able to explain this to anyone of this weird reoccurrence. It can't be coincidental anymore at this point. There has to be something behind it. But he doesn't know what. Whatever or whoever is behind whatever the hell this is is causing a big hurricane.

•

Now he is at the entrance of the rink. Unsurprisingly empty at first. But then in the blink of an eye, he can hear the sound of giggling coming closer from behind as he is being pulled by his hand and brought to the rink by the same girl. She drags him behind her as they go around in circles. She turns to face him as they skate and her contagious laugh never fades away letting his smile. He takes her hand and spins her around almost falling but catching her in time, her laughter becoming even heavier.

He wants to know who she is he wants to talk to her and know what's behind all of this. But he can't. When opens his mouth, no words come out. As if they're frozen or stuck. His throat allows nothing to flow but laughter from his mouth. It kills him and makes him a bit anxious that he can't communicate with her in that way. But he goes forth with smiling and spinning and laughing all around, as long as she is in his presence.

Everything is caused by perfect harmony. They may not be able to talk with words, but it almost seems as if they can read each other's minds. When Matteo gets the idea in his mind to do a lift, she is already prepared, letting him lift her into the air, lifting her arms all the way to touch the sky.

And when he puts her down, she turns to face him again. With a calmer face, still keeping the warmth of her smile in essence. She wraps her hands around either side of his waist and lifts her leg from the back in an elegant leg lift, his hand supporting her ankle. But her eyes ever leave is. Her smile growing soft and delicate.

He wants to take lead this time so he wraps his arm around her waist and picks her legs up with his other and carries her in his arms letting her giggles fill the air. He can feel her becoming more relaxed the longer she is in his arms. She leans her body back a bit, letting herself float with her arms out and eyes closed. It looked as if she were flying and made Matteo glow in awe.

When he sets her down, the music that he hadn't recognized was playing the entire time in the background changed into something a bit familiar too. He just couldn't recognize it at the moment. He was too busy getting lost to let it be found.

Matteo holds their hands together just as before. It was a feeling that made him such at peace while at that same time made him feel like he was running full speed. It was pretty indescribable, to say the least. It was a feeling that he never felt before. Not even in real life, and not even with Ambar. The realism of it all was too scary for his own thoughts, but let himself be deeply consumed in it not caring about the consequences or whatever it may bring.

The petite girl kept her stare at Matteo as she rolled the slightest bit over closer to be right under his chin. Resting her hands on his shoulders and lifting her heels off the ground. His instinct is to pull her even closer from her hips and so he does. His face still leans down a bit because of her height, but they're at the perfect level. Their noses just barely touching and the urging of his lips just begging to kiss hers. Without even thinking, his lips land on hers in a soft, swift motion, only letting them linger for one second.

When they pull away, he feels a change. Something different but ultimately at ease. He feels something magical and blissful and overall he feels his heart racing at a million miles an hour, bursting at the seams.

She must think the same, he can sense it. Because now she has her hand caressed at the back base of his head as she smashes her mouth against his taking power into her own hands. He does nothing but responds with the same amount of fierceness as he holds her tightly. If he was lost before, he has no sense of anything else then. He can't think or speak or breathe. He doesn't want anything else than to be kissing her like this forever. That's all his mind is at, just his lips on hers.

The feeling in his heart somehow keeps growing faster and stronger, pounding against his head and his chest as they kiss. And once the pounding gets to the loudest point, she's gone once again.

~~~~~

Matteo shoots up straight out of bed with his breathing out of control. It's the earliest hours of the morning, the sun barely rising from under the ocean view. But Ambar hears his commotion anyways and wakes up from beside him as well. "Matteo, what's going on? Are you okay?" She asks him with worry in her morning voice. He only shakes his head ferociously as he buries his head in his hands.

"Oh God," he breathes into his hands. "Nothing. It's nothing, I swear. Just- go back to bed," he directs Ambar as he lays back down, pulling the sheets up over his shoulders. She still sits up, confused. "That wasn't nothing, what were you dreaming about that made you frightened like that?" she asks. "Nothing! I told you to go back to sleep, forget it," he says harshly.

Normally, she wouldn't be scared of when Matteo yells. She's not the type to be intimidated by it. But like this, as if he was defending something for his dear life, she just followed his orders and tried to forget everything, trying back to go to sleep, even if it seemed impossible.

That afternoon, when they are shopping and Matteo follows around to hold Ambar's bags, it happens again. But this time. It seemed far too real to ignore. She was passing by through the outside window of the store they were in. The hair that he could never forget. No matter if there were so many of the same, he just knew.

When Ambar attempted to give him a hanger with a dress on it for him to hold, he shakes his head and drops her bags on the floor and goes out of the store to find her. "Matteo! Where the fuck are you going?" She yells at him completely pissed off. He sprints down the sidewalk, pushing people passing by and following the hair.

He's running and running and running, but he can't seem to catch her. She turns a corner, losing his place on her, but he still runs anyways. And when he reaches the corner, she's gone. He stands there so confused and frustrated, hands over his eyes, thinking he let her get away. Meanwhile, he can finally hear Ambar running to him as fast as she can in those heels of hers. He knows better not to look, but he does. Ambar's face furiously red with rage, hands fisted and nodding her head. He lets out a breath in preparation, praying to the sky to not let her murder him right then and there.

"Why the fuck did you run off, you asshole?" she spits at him as she arrives. "You just dropped all my shit there and took off running and leaving me there, what the hell is wrong with you?" He tries to focus on the rush of blood pumping through his ears, hoping her voice would be drowned out, but there was no such luck.

Coming up with some excuse was a total failure for him as well. "I saw someone carrying a bag from my favorite stop and I wanted to ask them where it was?" he tried to convince her. She didn't though. "That was excessively dramatic for such a thing," she crosses her arms. "Why didn't you just google it like a normal person?" He scratches behind his neck nervously. "Uh, google lies a lot, can't always trust them."

Ambar rolls her eyes, grabbing his wrist to pull him back. "well now you know or whatever, let's just get back and carry my stuff alright?" He nods in agreement, his mind half there. And he lets himself be dragged back with his head in the clouds, and he wonders if it's ever possible if he'll think the same of anything again.

•

After a few nights, he thought the dreams with her would've stopped by now. They've been gone since he ran away from Ambar while they were shopping the other day trying to forget about it, and it seemed like it worked for the most part. However, even if he was in a new location this time, some flat or whatever, he knew they weren't over. Because instead of her popping out from somewhere, she was already sitting right in front of him the moment it began.

She sat only inches away from him on a couch, her hands resting on her denim knees, fingers outstretched, wanting to touch his knee too. She seemed a bit darker and casual in this oddly intimate setting. Her hair was a blondish orangish color this time. It seemed to be a weird feature for a change but he still fell in love with her the same. Because they were the very same green eyes that had always been there, always kept him trapped in place.

He had his guitar resting on his lap, and she was waiting for him to play presumably. So without much control, he did. Except he knows this song. This one wasn't finished yet because he was still writing it. But somehow the melody and lyrics flowed out so smoothly, never in the way it was while he wrote it. It was as if he was writing the song all here and now. A dream completed it for him.

As he sang to her, her smile grew as bright as ever, gently swaying along with the chords. Matteo tried and tried again to break out of this trance or routine that was going on to try and talk to her. But nothing. His voice would not let him, it only let him keep singing. It hurt even harder than before. Because how can he even be sure he in love with a girl he can't have a conversation with? He knows for a fact that no matter what he does, she'll never be able to leave his mind. He knows that everything about her makes him always gravitate in her direction, pulling him in like a magnet. He knows completely that this sensation and connection for a girl he doesn't even know, that he has only ever stood by in these dreams has made him feel something even stronger than he feels with Ambar than he has felt at any point in his life.

His voice became softer as the song wound down, the strumming becoming looser and quieter. His gaze never shifting. It spiraled away in one quick motion after that. He took the strap off of his guitar and pushed it to the side, swiftly brushing her hair behind her ear and yanked her to his side in a kiss. That's what he was brought here for in the first place. The moment he opened his eyes he knew, that he wanted to taste her lips once more.

She responds automatically by pulling at the collar of his shirt, slowly dragging her body into his lap while deepening the kiss. Matteo let himself tangle his fingers in her long and colored hair, at last feeling the softness, burying himself in it. She gripped onto his collar so tightly, one button undid itself at the top. She was in no hurry to for anything. So she slowly trailed her fingers down his chest, agonizingly undoing one after another. It drove him absolutely wild at the pace she went, but he didn't interject. He only kissed her harder, asking to let his tongue through her mouth, and she let him as she pleased.

He was feeling that thing again. The feeling that everything was speeding up, his heart beating faster, the adrenaline rushing through his veins building up the intensity. Everything was about to be woken up, he had realized for the first time. That within a matter of seconds he won't be kissing her anymore and that he'll come back down to Earth and continue on doing whatever. He had no ways of stopping it. Kissing harder only made the time go faster. Holding her tighter did nothing but raise the volume on the blood rushing.

There was nothing he could do but linger in the lasting taste of her lips, the softness of her skin still felt on his fingertips. Nothing more than to grasp onto what he could feel left. Suddenly, there was no more.

~~~~~

The feeling of pounding inside his head made him groan in pain when trying to get up. Matteo touched his forehead feeling absolutely horrible. He definitely had drunken quite a bit last night. However, there was no explanation as to why he was on the living room couch in the mansion by himself, the room looking untouched and pristine as always.

Looking around him was useless, as probably the only three other people staying in the mansion were out at this time in the late morning. He looked for his phone which was on the corner edge of the coffee table and checked for messages. About four or five of them, and all from Ambar. Mostly about him trying to get his drunk ass up as he put it in her words. But the last one just said to meet her up for brunch at the beach restaurant, like they had planned for their last day in Cancun.

Matteo winced not only in pain but having to go to meet her and probably being extremely late. He knows that she'll get high key pissed. But he can't rewind the clock. He just has to face the music.

By the time he arrives, she is waiting outside of the entrance looking extremely bored on her phone. She raises her head when she sees him and rolls her eyes. "You finally bothered showing up, I see," she comments while crossing her arms. He begins to attempt an explanation but she doesn't let him. "I don't care, let's just go in." He rolls his eyes at her uptight attitude and follows her in.

When they are seated and reading the menu, he decides to ask her, "How did I end up on the couch last night?" she answers him bored while not bothering to look up, continuing to flip through the menu. "I don't know, I was still mad at you for the other day, so I left you by yourself at the bar when we went out to get drinks and you had more than I expected you to have. And when I got you back by a miracle, you couldn't walk up the stairs so I left you on the couch. The end,"

He glares at her with the most unbelieving look at how inconsiderate she was. But he didn't bother to fight back, not even caring at this point. So he goes back to flipping through the menu. He hates this entire vacation with all of his being, and couldn't wait any longer for it to be over.

Then the most unimaginable thing happened. She walked up to their table, as a waitress. And she introduced herself, talking. He could finally hear her voice, or at least what he thinks it is. As Ambar gives her the order, Matteo continues to stare dumbfounded at her not saying a word. The mix of reality and imagination crashing and colliding in his brain, overloading his system. Because when Ambar waves to him, snaps her fingers in front of his face, repeats his names so many times, he doesn't budge. Too stunned to function by any means. She looks slightly uncomfortable but at the same time blushes as his eyes follow her walking away as Ambar ordered for him in the end.

"Are you even on Earth, Matteo?" she asked him. He didn't look at Ambar until she fully disappeared into the kitchen and put his gaze back to her. "Huh?" he peeped. Ambar began rubbing her temples. "Okay, these past few days you have been acting anything but normal and I've tried to look past it, but it's getting too weird. So what the hell is up?" she asks, having enough with his bullshit.

He blinked once. Twice. Trying to process those very words in-between every other thing crammed inside his brain. But it wouldn't go through all that quickly. He knew she wasn't going to give up this time. And no matter how crazy he's been going, he decides to say fuck it and tells her.

"That girl, the one that's serving us, I've been seeing her in my dreams everywhere and I have no clue how the hell it started happening but it just has. She's everywhere I tell you and she won't leave my brain it's too hard to explain-" "What do you mean that girl? The person who's serving us is a guy, and his name's Simon," He's taken aback by this answer, having known that he saw her with his own two eyes. He was so sure it was real. "What are you talking about? I swear to you it's that girl, I have no idea what her name is but I'm telling you-" she holds her hand up to pause him in place.

"What girl do you keep seeing everywhere?" Then something hits her brain causing an eruption to boil inside of her. "Is this girl you're talking about, the one you chased the other day and left me? Are you cheating on me? Is that what this is?"

Matteo has officially screwed himself over this time. There's no way out of this now, no matter how hard he tried. "No, I'm not cheating on you. I'm just saying?" "How am I supposed to believe you when all you keep seeing is her even when you're with me. That's all you've been thinking about, and I'm not tolerating it."

Although relieved he knew what was coming, he didn't like the way it was ending. He shook his head being held in his hands. "Are you saying you're breaking up with me?" he breaks. Ambar can't even look at him. She turns her face slightly away, giving him an indirect cold stare. He knew his time and place was over, that she didn't want him near her. So he got up from his chair and began to walk out.

He turned around to look back at her and the waiter who she was right about, with a nametag with the name Simon printed on it and approached her table. He didn't want to see the rest, so he walked out and away from her.

He found himself at a park that had a familiar layout that the one in Buenos Aires had. Except this one was a lot closer to the beach, having the beautiful clear blue ocean view resting behind. So he went on a walk, passing by groups of kids and ice cream carts and lots and lots of birds. Just sinking in what has happened and what his brain has done to him.

After some time, out of the corner of his eye, he sees the actual waiter from the restaurant out of uniform and with skates on. He hears him laughing from the distance while shouting "Luna!" from behind him. And from afar, that same girl emerges to the waiter guy's side grabbing him along and skating through the park.

Matteo is sick of his mind playing horrible tricks on him, too tired of trying to decipher if it's real or not. But he can't help but look anyways with that tired expression of his.

They skate together through the park side by side and Matteo continues to walk by. But when he hears the loud humming of his unpublished song coming from her direction, his head shoots up in a flash. His head turns and although she is in front and afar, she looks back at him and winks, before skating back with the boy humming the song as she goes along.

#this new layout makes it impossible to do anything right I swear #soy luna #SL #lutteo #luna valente #matteo balsano #luna #valente #matteo #balsano #sl ff #soy luna ff #mywrittenworks

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