#soul crushing thank you
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you see i have many leobeth situationship/fwb enduced by their abandonnment and attachement issues thoughts also i think of a parallel with hephastus and athena were leo wants more but annabeth isn't into him like that.
ugh oh no…they’re the only people they can turn to and know each other emotionally and physically like no one else…they don’t have really emotional talks but they don’t have to, they just know…they bond over structures and robotics and things that tick, especially when their lives don’t tick.
they know how to make each other come like nothing else (the arrangement lasts long enough to where annabeth can’t come without leo—without his cock deep inside her or his head between her legs, without his warm breath against her lips or his arms around her. not that she could tell him this, of course).
she doesn’t want a relationship with him because she doesn’t want a relationship with anyone. she doesn’t want the wreck that comes with it (bonus points if percy died and leo promised to take care of her?? 👀 what if this was my last straw 🧍). she doesn’t want anything to change in their relationship.
but she knows leo is hurting every time he leaves her bed. the cycle continues with her and leo as it did with athena and hephaestus—but one thing is different. there’s a black bitter sorrow within annabeth, heavy as an anchor, threatening to pull her under if this continues any longer.
#soul crushing thank you#apologies for the mess i think i just blacked out for a sec and this came out of me lmao#leobeth#annabeth chase#leo valdez#pjo#tw smut#asks
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if Mike never survived the fall in the quarry he and Will would’ve been the gay Romeo and Juliet of Hawkins
#.#byler#michael wheeler i know what you are#miwi#stranger things#stranger things s1#thank @bylerworld for feeding into this idea of mine (I already reblogged it bc it crushed my soul so It can crush yours too💕)#byler endgame#will byers#mike wheeler#mike wheeler is gay#byler is canon#sobbing crying throwing up#i don’t even know what to tag this as tbh#Do @ even work in tags???#😭😭😭😭#ahhhhhhhhhhhh
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ART TRADE TIME!!!! (w @dontlookforme00 and @piereoglyphics :])
from the top, in order of who did sketch - lineart - color&shading:
donnie - piere - star
star - donnie - piere
piere - star - donnie
THIS WAS FUN!!! (we should totally do it again some time :])
u guys r so cool and i love ur arts btw im so glad i got to do this w u!!! :D
(my own sketch and lineart under the cut!!)
#ngl the struggle of coloring donnies sketch was so real#BUT doing the lineart for pieres sketch was lovely.. u know me guys.. im a freak i love doing lineart lmao#100% would do this again#you guys absolutely crushed this#also i feel legally obliged to mention YES. GINGER SOUL. THANK YOU FOR COMING TO MY TED TALK#chonny jash#chonnys charming chaos compendium#cccc#cccc heart#cj heart#cccc mind#cj mind#cccc soul#cj soul
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DS9 after making a Jake Sisko episode the most harrowing watch in tv history: 😜😝✨🎉✨💃💃💃
#ds9#jake sisko#The Visitor#nor the battle to the strong#star trek#every ep with him as a mc is a soul crushing experience thank you and goodnight
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my 1 (one) stardew opinion is shane should not have won the bachelor poll
#stardew valley#like i love shane but his storyline is not improved by him being a marriage canidate#if anything his bland post-marriage dialogue and 14 heart event dampen the message#and clint would have been a GREAT bachelor#linus not so much because he would have suffered from the same post-marriage dialogue dampening as shane#and he's too much of a free spirit to be tied down to your farm#like maybe he'd have a similar romance path as krobus? like you don't get MARRIED married but you have a commitment ceremony!!!#and the wizard... need to be in a love square with the witch and caroline...#his hidden dialogue. the situation with abigail. his adulterous past. his condescending behavior towards the player.#i also don't think he'd marry the player though. would probably make you soul bonded or something#maybe it increases your health or smth? and if you get divorced your health gets cut in half for like a week while you slowly recover#idk i really like the idea of him cursing you if you divorce him. 'not a very mature way to express anger' my ass#clint... i need to marry him...#there's a mod which makes his storyline WAYYY too similar to shane for my liking#with him going to therapy and stuff#but it DID make him realize being around emily makes him uncomfortable which i really like#i think a good route for him to go down would be him recognizing that what he feels for emily is not love or even desire#it's anxiety. emily is nice to him which makes him uncomfortable because no one is nice to him#which he confuses for attraction and he confuses her kindness for reciprocation#i think if emily ever asked him out he would turn her down#like emily would come up to you and be like 'hey i realize clint has a crush on me and i think it's really sweet so i'm gonna ask him out'#and then she does and he just goes 'O-O erm... no thank you...'#which confuses emily but she accepts being turned down and later on#clint talks to you about it like 'i thought that was what i wanted but her asking me out made me really uncomfortable and i don't know why'#and in a romance route he gets with you specifically because you make him feel calm :)#originally i wanted to say this was my most controversial stardew opinion but a LOT of people hate shane. so#also emily shouldn't have won the poll either!!!#sandy would have been a MUCH better option to flesh out her character and the desert more#marnie would have been interesting considering her relationship with mayor lewis#and i hate penny so i would fuck her mom out of spite lmaoooo
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grace chasity reads both testaments
#this is a bisexual christian joke#i hope this is clear :) i am the target audience :)#npmd#nerdy prudes must die#grace chasity#canon? idk canon is dead i devoured its soul#like girl has had one crush she acknowledged at 18#and - projecting my personal experience here - i absolutely liked girls *and had gay dreams about them* but didn't let them register with m#like i had full-on dreams about kissing girls and. refused to let myself think that made me queer??? just 'that's probably my subconscious'#'wanting to disturb me or something but i'm not actually bi'#and the crushes on them i had#also. i think it's fully possible she liked a girl and killed her a couple of years ago. (on purpose). but she doesn't feel bad bc that gir#was also queer! so REALLY she was preventing others from stumbling#whatever point is i think she's bi i don't care if she knows it or not#give me 3 main girls being multisexual please and thank you :D
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Me resisting the urge to type out a long angry rant complaining abt how other people don't portray Phoebe correctly
#mera talks GB#phoebe spengler#ghostbsuters#OK long story short I hate how many people only started caring about her once she showed hints at having a crush#like shipping is all that matters to people in fandom to the point where it takes over all other conversations#nobody wants to talk about her other interesting character traits she's just 'the girl who fell in love with a ghost' now and that's it#this stinks#not to mention the romanticizing of the whole soul separation thing despite it being disturbing & OOC#OK that wasn't very short but you get what I mean#anyway I should stop and focus on the positive today is supposed to be a nice day with my family#I just needed 2 get that off my chest thanks to anyone who actually reads through my nonsense
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my last week, a visual demonstration
#Robin processes emotions on main#hi yes I came back early. it's in order to process. I needed to like.... spill my guts on the dashboard tonight#IM STRUGGLING..#I have GOT to get a job#just one (1) more visit to a friend this summer and then I will be APPLYING for things again#also I'm having the very devil of a time trying to get myself to contribute to this household. I hate it#I hate that helping out makes me feel like I'm losing my agency—losing myself—like I'm dying every time. I want to be BETTER than this#but I also need to feel like an adult with agency but also I need to BEHAVE like an adult but even just saying that makes me feel nauseous#I need. something. to change. I hate this. I feel selfish and cowardly and I hate feeling selfish and cowardly#I need to . communicate. work something out with my mother so that I stop feeling perpetually behind and ashamed#if I could manage to feel good about chores and not just like I'm scrambling to keep up..... that would..... be... more... motivational#the problem is that I feel unsafe/unstable right now and my instinctive response is to close myself off to all demands#WHICH AS YOU CAN IMAGINE IS NOT CONDUCIVE TO BECOMING MORE STABLE.#demand avoidance makes me bad at contributing to the household AND terrified of applying to jobs and AUGH... AUGH.#I DO BETTER WHEN I LIVE ON MY OWN#living on my own‚ I don't have to deal with the whole soul-crushing horrorshow of negotiating my own emotions about doing chores#chores are GOOD and ENJOYABLE when they're for ME. they're only psychological torture when they're things I do as part of my ''rent''#ok. bedtime. I've sufficiently spilled my dang guts all over the place. it will get better eventually I think#I'm just having a horrible time Right Now#I'll figure this out though dangit#I KNOW the answer is to just Do the stuff and face fears and communicate and whatever I KNOW. but if anyone tells me that I'm going to bite#ok I'm done thank you and sorry to anyone reading this far <3 it really will be all right
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BAXTER IS FINALLY REAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
RRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#WE WON#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#I prayed for times like this 😔🏆#He sucks so much I love him weird tiny fish man 🥺🥺🥺🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹#Him and Charlie are so silly together onggmggggggg I can't wait for the soul-crushing angst with them 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰#I've waited so long to see him onscreen thank you dearly the forces that be 🙏 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏#been getting w news after w news lately I'm so happy I could combust <333333333333#baxter#charlie morningstar#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel spoilers
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How have you been? :)
#asks#thank you for asking im actually pretty okay i just got nuked by monthly blood curse#also im the resident ffxiv guy at work so the triple whammy of writing up event guides+locking in for the live letter at the same time#i still have to write out the digest on the job changes before raid tonight ugh#bro im tired. but like in the mundane way not the soul crushing way#i also havent had the chance to sit down and write for a little creature and im trying not to feel guilty abt it#bc guilt is the number one fic killer tbh i get too intimidated to work on it#but also its been sooo long djdjjf i need to update
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THE BEST OF PRIORITY: MARS (PART 2)
Featuring: Cmdr. Sophie Shepard, Maj. Kaidan Alenko, Lt. James Vega, and Dr. Liara T'Soni With: The Illusive Man and Dr. Eva Coré Your vision is pathetically limited. You were a tool- an agent with a singular purpose. And despite our differences? You were relatively successful. But like the rest of the relics in this place, your time is over. Mass Effect 3: Legendary Edition (2021)
#mira makes gifs ✨#shenko#james vega#kaidan alenko#sophie shepard#liara t’soni#the illusive man#eva core#mass effect#mass effect 3#me3#mass effect legendary edition#dailygaming#ITS PART 2 BABY! I COULDNT GIF PEAK SHENKO CONTENT AND NOT MAKE HER A 2-PARTER YALL#these are my favorite bisexuals on the citadel i had to give mars a double feature ✨#‘the person i followed to hell and back the person i loved- are you in there somewhere?’ we cried. for real like this line THIS LINE#the first time i played ME3 it crushed me into a thousand pieces and it still does tbf#but like i also forgot how many good lines TIM has in this first mission until i was collecting footage while i was playing#like his lines go HARD (not javik ashes of a trillion dead souls hard but still)#also i may hate him but he looks fine as fuck in those new PV suits i will not lie#also im ngl the way femshep carries kaidan after he gets his head smashed against the side of the cruiser sends me every time i cannot#like sometimes you just have to carry your boyfriend like he's a sack of potatoes over your shoulder when he's bleeding to death!#like come on girl CARRY HIM BRIDAL STYLE or DONT CARRY HIM AT ALL#but on a serious note the way shep looks at kaidan back on the normandy? when he's in the med bay?#the way they just are so lost in him being injured?? in the possibility of him dying?? the panic in their eyes??#the way they only get brought back to reality when liara starts shouting?? chef's kiss tbh#bioware VS canon may be poo but the end of priority mars will always be famous to me#thanks for reading two gif sets worth of rants if you stayed for both!!!#i hope you have a good day!! 🥹✨
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Our ways of coping with losing the movie are different but shoutout to whoever decided to just upload a bunch of yoi djs
You worked hard friend
#yoi#yuri on ice#ice adolescence#its for a site#anyways i check for newly updated manga and manwhas and like just before the announcement it was the usual variety#and then i checked now and i mostly see yoi djs on the first page#thank you friend for the crumbs#my heart? broken#my soul? crushed#my mind? full of yoi thanks#edit: ehhh it was like 20 djs my bad not the entire page
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I just want to say a huge thank you and I love you to everyone that sent me asks yesterday, I cannot tell you how much it meant to me to hear that you love my writing and what you love about it. I have felt so down and lost the past few weeks and it means the world to me.
#thank you#I love you all#I love writing#I’m a words of affirmation kind of girl#uplifting#seasonal depression has been crushing my soul#but this meant everything to me#text post
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sometimes recall that Scenario of like "oh a stranger draws another stranger sharing a space with them & without their knowing & Drawn Stranger is like how flattering that you did that & i love your Beautiful Artistic Interpretation of me" which i hate so i was like what's the opposite of that. & i'm pretty sure i'm averse to like every aspect of it & the opposite is about strangers sharing space with consideration for that & like oh no its sickos using headphones, on they phones, reading. if direct verbal interactions happen (or eye contact, or nonverbal cues) it doesn't have to Transcend shit or be an inherent improvement over not interacting. but also the best opposite is like oh sorry i looked over your shoulder kind of or just indeed spontaneously glimpsed what you were drawing but i like your jellicle cats haunted house episode fanart. or i have a question about some technique or materials i see you using b/c i'd be interested in having that knowledge for myself & if this is a meetanything that's fine i guess but can be a limited as what it is strangers interaction for a minute which is no worse
#obviously also a scenario like on billions like oh amazing of you to have drawn me without my knowledge while i slept; Artist Bf#while i also happened to have my makeup on as always & be posed with such Aesthetic Worth(tm) b/c i'm so Above anything else#that even while unconscious i could not possibly look inelegant. & i will cherish this drawing. like both of you die challenge#also hilarious to throw back to the misogyny logic Primarily about like oh men have their Pure minds & souls vs their base bodies right#women's minds & souls being Lesser means they're considered the horney ones who ruin men's cerebral transcendence w/their sicko seduction#(which is them existing btw) like not at all like that Bitches Ruining My Life no nut november logic has gone away obviously lol#god wendy my special genius omniscient Art Boy was making such true worthy Abstract Paintings....real art#and then ohh wendy Ruins it with her wiles making him Draw From Life his Woman Portraits of Romance. thanks a lot#and then that art man's Spontaneous Expression Of Genuine Emotion arrrgh i Destroy the Canvases i pour Black Paint over it#is once more Real; Valuable Art. i hate billions lmfao like can we have been serious about anything for 5 seconds???#throw back to how Obviously Inferior people are if they'd like to frame a production cel from a scifi movie they like#and don't know what kinds of Fine(tm) Art(tm) they like. but mafee; worthiest of the three! you took an art history class!!#and there's winston indeed wearing headphones & wooing his crush with like. treating them like a person as he does anyway. eugh imagine#billions Could imagine like yeah if Winston did this like i drew you just now? look i painted you from memory? like ew barf you sicko#winston billions#not actually About Billions primarily but sure brought it up enough in the tags
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#big gender rant ahead i just need to write down my thoughts#personal#so i think im a he/him trans lesbian??#i think ive been denying my feminine side for a long time now but middle school me was right. well. half right#idk why id built up some weird barrier in my mind about being trans and being a lesbian#but now im like more sure than ever#i still dont know if i could call myself a woman. and i thought i was so adamant about not using she/her again but it honestly?#doesn't bother me that much anymore. its not my preference but its not as soul crushing as it used to be#i have these weird subliminal gender rules for myself that ive been beating myself down with even though i#understand that theyre fake and dont hold anyone else to them. so why have a double standard? cant i have a fun gender?#ever since high school its been an uphill battle just letting myself live freely and having self confidence#i just turned 24. i dont have to be beholden to stupid hormonal teenage self loathing anymore#the world is a beautiful place and gender is just made up anyway. so why cant i be trans and butch? who cares??#i think i worded it well in my last personal post. ive been living a gender of convenience#but fuck that! i want the gender that makes sense to me! that makes me happy! its my life and i should live it how i want to!#...i still have some regrets about my top surgery. i wish i wasnt so weirdly flat chested now.#but hopefully the fat will redistribute eventually and itll look more natural as the years go on..#but i definitely dont regret going on T. i love my deep voice and my body hair#anyway if you've read this far thanks for listening to my mad ramblings#and dont forget you can have a fun gender too!
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but do the crane wives and the oh hellos really truly understand the cultural impact they have had on fandom culture as a whole ..........
#do they know i cant listen to passerine without thinking of one of the saddest fanfics ive ever read in my life#i know passerine is a jesus song but dsmp is my bible so#do they know when i listen to allies or enemies i still think of bench duo#the dsmp to me has morphed into like. this sad dying bed of flowers that i neglect in the name of shame#& i refuse to acknowledge its existence until i take a moment to actually look at it then im overcome with like#soul crushing nostalgia and longing for a place i can never go back to#what am i without you ? yourself#i'll drink bleach now thanks#berry 06.1
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