#sorry. it’s true tho

[theberryboy]

these bitches SERVING‼️‼️

(in the US military)

[starboy14176]

It’s my god given right 2 make clancy plural

[inkskinned]

he says i hate everyone except you and that is addictive and that is kind of romantic and beautiful because you're young and you're kind of a sarcastic asshole too and you don't like bad boys, per say, but you don't really like good ones either. and you like that you were the exception, it felt like winning.

except life is not a romance book, and he was kind of being honest. he doesn't learn to be nice to your friends. he only tolerates your family. you have to beg him to come with you to birthday parties, he complains the whole time. you want to go on a date but - people are often there, wherever you're going. he's just so angry. about everything, is the thing. in the romance book, doesn't he eventually soften? can't you teach him, through your own sense of whimsy and comfort?

at first - you know introverts often need smaller friend groups, and honestly, you're fine staying at home too. you like the small, tidy life you occupy. you're not going to punish him for his personality type.

except: he really does hate everyone but you. which means he doesn't get along with his therapist. which means he has no one to talk to except for you. which means you take care of him constantly, since he otherwise has no one. which means you sometimes have to apologize for him. which means he keeps you home from seeing your friends because he hates them. you're the single exception.

about a decade from this experience, you'll type into google: how to know if a relationship is codependent.

he wraps an arm around you. i hate everyone except you. these days, you're learning what he's actually confessing is i have very little practice being kind.

[hinamie]

binding vow

[biscuitquasar]

It's cool when ppl invent another von Karma sibling to make sense of the "my granddaughter has a dog named phoenix" line but i personally think it's infinitely funnier if Manfred von Karma just invented a whole granddaughter and dog to make his point seem more valid and then Edgeworth just sat there in the courtroom like huh. Didn't know i had another sibling. Guess it was relevant to my prosecutor training.

[yaksha-lover]

You were made in the image of the angel.

That’s what Rollo believes when he spots you, a speckle of light, amongst your tainted peers. You’re truly captivating to him; one so untouched by all the disgusting, dark miasma that swarms you, swirling it’s depraved fingers through your hair.

Despite magic’s presence in your life, it’s never taken root inside of you. For that, you are beautiful; the antithesis to the wicked fae that he so loathed.

He should have known Malleus would try to corrupt you. The dragon was alluring: dark tresses spilling around his broad shoulders, his piercing green eyes, and those magnificent horns upon his head. As gorgeous and charismatic as the fallen angel himself; that was what made him so dangerous.

It’s not your fault you gave into Malleus’ temptation. Rollo knows even he could have strayed from his righteous path had he been less disciplined than he was.

Still, he can’t end the burning rage when he sees the way you’ve been seduced by that man, the mark he’s begun to leave upon you.

He calms himself for a moment.

He’ll have to deal with it. For every drop of himself that Malleus has put into you, Rollo will have to cleanse you by doing the same.

Every kiss, every nip at your neck, every skirting of hands across your thighs will need to be replaced with a touch of his own, that of a pious man.

He’s sure you’ll understand - it’s only the price to pay for salvation.

[possamble]

In one of the extra comics Marcille mentions that elves don't have body hair, her included. So Falin staring at a naked pussy is Canon

I mean, I hear what you're saying but...

To be 100% honest, this feels really ambiguous. She's a little too worked up in that second panel. Like, a lot of people have interpreted it as her being defensive and self-conscious about the fact that she shaves and waxes religiously (especially in the context of a trans headcanon) and that feels more right to me?

My personal interpretation is that she really doesn't grow little facial hairs (partially bc we've seen Senshi's huge beard turn into a tiny little elf stache so there is some real evidence for that). But then she doesn't actually know if she has peach fuzz or not and gets REALLY flustered about being scrutinized before she can check for herself and shave off anything she doesn't like.

But either way, my point is that I don't think we're meant to take Marcille's words here at 100% face value and consider it evidence for elf physiology.

And listen. I think Marcille should have a bald pussy in the bath scene bc rule of funny. But beyond that, I want to believe elves can grow pubic hair. I want to believe in the postcanon blondie bush. She's exponentially cuter with it, and I don't want Falin to have to eat bald pussy for the rest of her life. I'm only half joking when I say I want it as a part of her character growth. At the end of the story, Marcille Donato accepts that she is a living, breathing animal that eats and will be eaten and sweats and shits and grows hair all over her body. She learns to accept mortality, starts to reconcile with the inherent grotesqueness of being alive, and most importantly, lets her bush grow out for the first time in her life. And it's beautiful.

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

so i was thinking about how Howdy has eight legs bc he's a caterpillar - those have lots of legs. but butterflies? they only have six

imagine he comes out of his chrysalis and he's down two limbs. mf would have to relearn how to Walk

[spoopderman]

Some doodles of bartender Logan inspired by @cuntylogan's FANTASTIC fic Don't Want To Be A Fool For You. I CANNOT recommend this fic enough y'all, I may or may not have already read the chapters posted twice 👀👀👀

[flowerakatsuka]

my shimamatsu artbook came in so i finally got to see the rest of the unreleased teacher set...

scans of gym teacher oso from this set can be found here!

choro's a math teacher, which i feel like is pretty fitting for her. they drew her very cute, peak froggy expression.

ichi's a science teacher, like in teacher matsu merch by movic. he's also setting a bad example for his students by wearing open-toed shoes which is against standard lab safety rules, for shame smh.

jyushi is an art teacher! very cute, he's definitely fitting the bill of the zany art teacher stereotype.

totty's an english teacher. he's really meant it when he said he doesn't want to work bc he's giving us NOTHING in that awakened art. his outfits are very cute, though.

" gee, mj. where's kara? wasn't he the one you were the most curious about? " wELL. i waited to share him last bc...

when i tell you that i opened to this page in art book to find this set, saw kara, and then immediately closed the book...

he's a japanese / literature teacher, which i do think fits. ( still such a missed opportunity to have him as a music teacher... ) * puts my face in my hands * he's such a dork.

[skunkes]

something silly and badly formatted

[scrolpencer]

babetectives part 2 - women edition ✨

(over here is part 1)

[de1-os]

Chapter 3 is genuinely so funny for this

[whaliiwatching]

memes in defiance of valentine’s day

(blood & artistic nudity under readmore)

[ladyazurith]

[hellishfig]

the single funniest notes i have ever read on a fic