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tanix-dragon · 2 months

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Is That a New Guy or Am I Losing My Mind; or, A Beginner's Guide to Finding Headmates

Written by Roger de Camden of the Draconic Wizard Workshop

Hello, everybody! This is an essay for both plurals who might struggle finding, identifying, or confirming headmates, as well as people who are questioning whether or not they’re plural. Certain pieces of advice may apply better to questioners than established systems, and vice versa, but rest assured, it is intended for both!

This essay will be broken into several sections for various “phases” of discovery and working things out, but a disclaimer before we get to that: this is heavily based on our own experiences. This is not a one-size-fits-all kind of guide. I’m going to try to make it such, but, well, I can’t make any promises, because there are infinite ways of being a system out there, and everyone’s a little different. This is just what I’ve found works for us, and, to a large extent, many of our system friends! That being said, if you try to start syscourse or invalidate other systems for any reason in response to this essay, I’m going to block you and that’s that.

Also, sorry if I go between spellings for words. I’m English, but the body is American and that means that I don’t know how to spell certain words anymore.

So! Onwards, towards discovery!

Step One: Getting an Inkling

The first step to figuring out whether or not you’ve got a headmate (new or otherwise undiscovered; I’ll mostly be calling them “new” as in “new to you”) is having an inkling that one might exist. This is mostly a passive process, and you’re probably familiar with it if you’re reading this guide. Maybe you felt something scuttle through headspace (if you have one) or through the back of your mind. Maybe you felt a presence looming behind you, mentally, that bolted when you “looked.” Maybe you had a very strong emotional reaction to something that makes no sense for you to react to, but would make sense for a character you’ve been really attached to in a show. Or maybe you slipped into an unfamiliar accent, had a loss of memories and woke up with nail polish on in a colour you hate, or just felt an opinion about something that doesn’t match your usual one. Sometimes, you may even “hear” comments about things going on in your mind.

There are a lot of little things that can tip you off. Most of them are going to be things that are misaligned with your own perception of yourself, your opinions, and your behavior. This is usually a sign that someone is co-conscious or co-fronting with you without you being aware of it. Some headmates are very sneaky this way, and some may not realise that they exist at all while doing this! Don’t hold being hard to notice or get a hold of against your headmates—many of them don’t realise that they exist, don’t know how to not be this way, or are doing it for what they perceive to be a good reason (this last one is especially common in disordered systems). Maybe they’re scared, or just not ready to be confronted yet. Don’t worry—remember, you have your whole lives to figure out everyone who’s in there, and the time will pass anyways! Take it easy.

One specific thing that tends to tip us off to a new fictive is that we realise that… no one is aware of running a character that we’re playing in a tabletop roleplaying game. Maybe someone started off running them, but they sure seem to be doing their own thing now! That character may be hard to “turn off” or “put on the shelf” when you stop playing them—and they may continue to make comments and have opinions about things in your life. This is a dead giveaway! Sometimes when we think about a character, we feel a “movement” or interest somewhere in our mind that doesn’t match anyone else’s pattern of thinking or interests, which also can be a giveaway that they’re scuttling around somewhere. Also beneficial, for us, is our synesthesia—every headmate has a colour associated with them, and when we get a thought pattern that seems to match someone but the colour is off, it can make us realise that maybe there’s someone else in here. For example, if someone were to be really interested in jellyfish, we might think that it’s Caspian, but if the colour comes back as red and not blue, then we know for certain that it’s not him.

This first inkling of a new headmate may be obvious or it may be subtle. You may question yourself repeatedly, but remember: if you feel like you are “accidentally faking,” that’s not how faking works. Faking must be done intentionally and on purpose. You could be wrong, yes, but being wrong isn’t inherently bad. It’s just that you were mistaken about something. Nothing wrong with that! We’re all mistaken about all kinds of things every day! Be kind to yourself while trying to figure things out.

Step Two: Are You There, Headmate? It’s Me, Your Other Headmate

Steps two and three are interchangeable in order, but I thought I’d put this one first because it tends to be the one that’s hardest and most distressing, rather than step three, which is about identifying who the hell your headmate is. We’ll get to that, never fear!

So, let’s say you think there might be someone in there. How can you tell for sure? How can you open communication? How can you get them integrated okay?

The bad news is that this depends heavily on the system. The good news is that there’s no need to panic, rush, or be afraid, because once again, you’ll figure it out eventually, and it will be okay!

My first suggestion is to take note of everything that’s made you think there might be someone else in there. Write it down, if that helps! Write down everything that seems to get the entity’s attention, if anything. Write down anything that might help you identify who it might be! In some instances, you might have a character that seems a little independent but you can’t tell whether they’re really a headmate or not. In my experience, this is often how many non-disordered systems (but it’s not exclusive to them!) realise that they’re plural. Knowing who it is will make this step easier, but it isn’t necessary! After all, if you know who it is, you can also write down things that might bait them into responding. Interests and friends of theirs are good examples.

Your goal in this step is to try to draw them out into doing things, speaking, or acting in ways that will give away that they are for certain there. For systems with heavy amnesia or dissociative barriers, this might be significantly harder, but my best suggestion there is to jump straight to trying to communicate, however you can—and this isn’t a bad approach for other systems, either. You can try internal communication, although you might get no response, or an abnormal one, if the headmate is new. For example, with us, new headmates usually respond to direct queries with anxiety—which, while not good for communication and not ideal for the headmate in question, does help us key in on the fact that they definitely exist. You can also try external communication, if internal communication isn’t working or is difficult for you. Write a note in a journal or a sticky note, or even in a notes app or a private Discord server. Sometimes, headmates can find replying over text to be easier. If you’re a high-dissociation and high-amnesia system who is trying to figure out if it’s someone old or new who is fronting and doing things while you’re unaware, leaving sticky notes places asking people to write down who’s fronting when they see it (if they even know who they are) might be helpful. Keep experimenting, and do what works best for you!

As a last resort for uncertain, new, or inexperienced systems, you can try something called “puppeting” on a suspected headmate, especially if you know who they are and just aren’t sure whether or not they’re here. A warning: this is rude and not advised under most circumstances, but sometimes it’s the only way to make absolutely sure that someone is in there with you, especially when you’re not used to it. Have an apology ready and mean it. Puppeting is when you try to force a headmate to do something, especially something unusual or out of character for them. For example, if I thought I might have my character Gorka as a headmate, but I wasn’t sure, I might try to call up a scenario involving Gorka and then try to imagine her doing something wildly out of character, that she would never, ever do. If I couldn’t get a response out of that, or if I had no idea who this new headmate might be, I might just try to make them physically do something—strongly imagining them doing a stupid dance or similar! No response doesn’t necessarily mean you do or do not have a headmate, but a strong response—usually of anger, offense, or “slapping” your “hands” away—indicates someone separate from yourself! Apologize immediately and then attempt to engage in communication once they’ve calmed down a little, or try to transition into it through an explanation.

There are a lot of reasons that a headmate might not respond to puppeting, though. They might be non-confrontational, or hiding their presence from you intentionally for any number of reasons. (Maybe they’re nervous, not ready to exist yet, afraid of how you might respond, afraid of accepting that they’re in a system—it could be anything.) In cases like this, you might just get discomfort instead of a strong response, which is easy to confuse for being your own rather than theirs. Try to sort out whether you just feel strange doing it, or if it’s someone else’s discomfort bleeding through. I know it’s hard, but that’s a difficult thing to give advice for, I’m afraid! Other reasons may be that they just dip from the front when you try (removing themself from your sphere of influence completely), or if they’re a character you frequently play, they might be so used to being pulled around into doing things that it doesn’t bother them, or bothers them so little that you don’t notice.

Usually, if you’re at the point of trying puppeting, there’s enough signs that this person really is a headmate to dissuade you from trying it once you’re a little more used to it. It’s a temporary and unideal tool that should leave your toolbox as soon as you become confident enough to identify new headmates without getting grabby with them. Undoubtedly, trying to establish communication is a better approach, if you can get it to work.

Usually, once we’ve properly spotted a headmate and made it clear to them that we know they’re there, one of two things happens: either they come sit in the front for a few days or weeks to settle in, let us identify them, and get used to being a full active member of the system, or they realise that they exist and have a panic attack. This “new headmate panic” can last anywhere from a few minutes to multiple days, and may fluctuate in strength. Sometimes, a new headmate might seem fine early on, but have this panic after a few days, weeks, or even longer. Be gentle during this time, especially if you yourself have a strong reaction—be gentle with both, or all, of you! Realizing that you’re in a system can be very distressing, as can realizing you have a new headmate, so try to be gentle, let yourself feel what you’re going to feel, and work through it in the best way you have. Try not to direct any anger or negative feelings towards anyone else in your system during this time, and just let the storm pass before really trying to get to know each other.

Step Three: Who Is This Guy, Anyway?

Once again, you can do this step before or after step two, but I put it here because I decided to include some tips for getting to know your headmate, not just identifying them (if there is anything to identify). If your system is introject-heavy, or if you’re asking yourself if you’re just really interested in a character or if they’re a new headmate, this is an important step! Who is this? Are they an introject of some kind? Are they something or someone else? Is there anything to identify, per se, or is it just a situation of getting to know a whole new person? This is a very, very different step depending on your system, and is going to skew very much towards my own experiences. I’m sorry about that, but I will do my best!

If you’ve already established communication with this headmate, even if it’s shaky, you can try to get information from them that way. They might be willing to give you a name, a code name, a colour, an aesthetic, likes or dislikes, something you can use to familiarise yourself with them or identify them from a list of “suspects” if you have such a thing. (We always do, because we’re almost all fictives, and we know our own patterns at this point.) For us, new headmates almost never actually identify, and just sullenly sit while trying to figure themselves out and will only confirm who they are once we figure it out. It’s sort of like playing a mystery game, assembling clues based on a myriad of factors. If you have some suspicions, just like the previous step, you can try to bait out responses by doing things that might interest who you suspect this headmate might be.

Again, I suggest writing things down! Write down likes and dislikes, things that get their attention, interests, even things that make them anxious or afraid. Whether it’s a case of identification or just getting to know them, this is invaluable information for interacting with someone sharing a head with you, and it may even be helpful for them as they get their feet under them.

Another invaluable tool is talking to people outside of your system. They can help you identify when you’re acting unusually, when you might have someone unfamiliar riding co-conscious, and even who that person might be. You may be too tangled up in your own feelings, your dissociation, or the desperation to understand who is in your head with you. It’s easy to get lost in the weeds and lose sight of the big picture, but another friend, especially another system that knows you well, can be extremely helpful! One of our system friends has clocked many a headmate of ours before we were even certain they were there—just “hmm, you’ve been very much like X lately” and they were absolutely right.

Regardless, taking notes on your new headmate, asking them about themselves, and sharing things about yourself are all important steps to getting to know them! They may be uncomfortable, they may distrust you, they may be afraid—or they could be friendly and excited to be here! It really depends on who it is and their comfort level. Don’t push—if they’re not comfortable talking yet, don’t make them! Let them adjust at their own pace and get to know them as they’re willing to let you. I know it can be distressing to have a totally unknown entity co-fronting with you, but sometimes it’s one of those things that you have to take a deep breath and carry on through until they’re willing to talk. I know you can do it! Talk through it with someone outside of your own head if it’s difficult to give yourself some fortitude if you need to. I know it helps me.

Step Four: Now What?

Let’s say that you’ve confirmed that you do have a headmate, and either have or are on the road to identifying them, if applicable. Now what?

As I’ve said before: be gentle with yourselves! Especially for a new or inexperienced system, and especially for someone who is just realising that they’re a system, this can be overwhelming, distressing, or any other number of emotions. Remember that having or gaining headmates isn’t inherently a bad thing, and while this all might take some getting used to, it’s going to be okay. You’ll figure out an equilibrium eventually, and it is absolutely possible to live a long, happy life with your headmates. Remember that you’re all in this together, and you’re a team.

People may not want you to notice them, may not want to be in the system, or may avoid attention as best they can for a lot of reasons, and trying to make them feel at home, or at least more comfortable, is essential. It can be scary being in a system all of a sudden, especially if they’re an introject or otherwise had a life outside or before this one. Maybe they don’t like the body, or are afraid of another headmate, or are terrified of a negative response from you or someone else. Don’t force these people into situations they’re not ready for! If you’re looking for someone, trying to identify them, or trying to help them, and you’re just causing a lot of distress, back off for a while. Let them calm down and come to you in their own time. Sometimes, you have to do the system equivalent of leaving cookies out on a plate and turning your back to them so that your new headmate can take them without being watched. Take things at the pace that you’re all the most comfortable with, and as always, be kind.

I really do suggest talking to someone about this process, if you can. Journal if you’d like, especially if you can’t trust anyone with this, or don’t feel comfortable doing so yet. Getting your words out of your head helps you sort them out a lot, especially in the case of systems, where a lot of people’s thoughts can get jumbled together. Writing them all down, even if you don’t know whose they are, can be helpful. We find that talking to other system friends is of the most benefit, and our new members are far more likely to speak to them first rather than us, because there’s a degree of separation and that’s more comfortable for them. Whatever works for you, do it! The idea is to get comfortable with each other, and with being here together.

Find things that your new headmate likes doing. Goratrix has a whole panel about this aimed at fictives, but essentially, if your new headmate doesn’t have reason to front and isn’t interested in anything, you probably won’t see much of them, and they may end up miserable. Make sure you engage with them and their interests. Let them make friends if they’d like. Get them snacks. Again: whatever works! This is going to depend very heavily on your system, so follow your gut instinct on this one, I think.

Absolutely essential, though, is to not repress anybody. I know sometimes getting a new headmate can be scary, especially if they’re unfamiliar, frightening, seemingly monstrous, or a persecutor, but remember: they’re probably just as freaked out as you are, if not more so, and they need patience and understanding. Statistically, if they’re doing something troublesome, they’re trying to help and just don’t know how, or are misguided on what “help” looks like. Be kind, and try to find a solution that works for everyone.

Past that… just get to know each other. Figure out how to live together and how to make your combined life the best life it can be. For us, there’s so many of us that someone new can almost always find a fast friend in someone else, and sticks with them for a while until they’re more used to the system and more confident fronting and doing things without their buddy. Other systems may be able to mimic this approach, or may need to do something very different. Again, again, again, do what works best for you! If parts of this guide seem unhelpful or counterproductive, ignore them! This is based on our experience of plurality, not yours. Always do what’s best for you, what helps the most of you, and what causes the least distress while still letting you function as much as you need to.

Being plural is a very personal experience, in a lot of ways, which is pretty funny because sometimes that personal experience is spread across two or twenty or five hundred people. It’s also a very personalized experience, meaning we’re all quite different. Your “now what?” might look very different from ours, and that’s okay. We can only do our best, and that’s always good enough.

I hope this is helpful to someone! If you have any questions, please feel free to ask, and I may edit this guide in the future if it seems that I left something out or think of anything to add. =)

#tans journals #de camden's essays #plurality #endo safe #i MEAN IT THOUGH. NO SYSCOURSE.#and i'm sorry if this guide doesn't apply to your system or is unhelpful!#i could never hope to write something that is helpful to all systems of all types #this is just how we do it and how a lot of systems we know do it #so hopefully this is helpful to someone!#this is also up on our website in a less shitty format as is goratrix's panel i mentioned

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eexho · 1 year

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throws these at you and runs away

#sorry the comic is shitty #i dont know how to format #adventure time #princess bubblegum #bonnebell bubblegum #bonnibel bubblegum #bonnie bubblegum #marshal lee #fionna and cake #prince gumball #gumlee

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ge · 5 months

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okechukwu nzelu, here again now / hua xi, the past still needs me / @.robertszombie / ocean vuong, time is a mother / naomi shihab nye, fuel: poems; hidden / kaveh akbar, thirstiness is not equal division / david foster wallace / unknown

#OBLIGATORY WEB WEAVE sorry guys i couldnt wait for the anime..shitty gifs from the amv osts instead #rotmhs #return of the blossoming blade #return of the mount hua sect #rotbb #화산귀환 #web weaving #web weave #poetry #a little on the nose but watever.. too lazy to fix the formatting or find other excerpts

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incorrect-hs-quotes · 8 months

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Roxy: wehere's seasons greasons

Roxy:

Roxy: its that tmie of year agian

Dirk: It doesn't have to be.

Roxy: its not optional!

#submission #dirk strider #roxy lalonde #dirk #roxy #okay i know this is horribly out of season now (january) but hear me out #them vibes #also i so desperately want to post this with the text coloured but my phone does not handle selecting text on the tumblr submission box #like at all. it's a shitty iphone se from 2016 and the screen is so small #that the keyboard+formatting selector+random 'FOLLOW THE TUMBLR SUBMISSION GUIDELINES' box at the top is too much #okay well it doesn't say that exactly but it does have a link to the TOS so it's like... that but subtle. anyways #it cannot display and the text floods right off the fuckin screen never to be seen again #until i misclick the tag section that is #that's entirely unrelated i am so sorry lol #//#homestuck #incorrect homestuck quotes #mod terezi #listen the seasonings are greasoning right now i see no reason to keep it restricted to just december #(editor's note: it is currently -7f right now where i am. the seasons do be greasons)

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operationslipperypuppet · 2 years

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the gang turns on murph part 17, colorized

#the number is a joke bc it’s happened a lot but i don’t know how often #also i’m watching on my phone tonight so my screenshots are shitty and the post format is shitty. im sorry #neverafter #dimension 20 #neverafter spoilers #brian murphy

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ghostlyyraccoon · 1 year

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Rational Chapter 1 (Kavetham Hanahaki AU)

Warning: Graphic depictions of violence, blood, injury, explicit content in ch2

Ship: Kaveh/Alhaitham

Chapter: 1/2

Summary:

Have you heard what they’ve been saying about the Academiya’s Scribe? Rumour has it he’s come down with a lung disease of the most curious kind! The whole House of Daena has witnessed him coughing up leaves and petals like crazy! Apparently, it’s been going on for several weeks, yet the Scribe refused to go see a doctor until his health took a sudden turn for the worse. Yesterday, he was found unconscious at his desk! Fortunately, the General Mahamatra and Light of Kshahrewar were closeby and able to bring him to the Bimarstan before anything worse could happen.

“Have you heard what they’ve been saying about the Academiya’s Scribe? Rumour has it he’s come down with a lung disease of the most curious kind! The whole House of Daena has witnessed him coughing up leaves and petals like crazy! Apparently, it’s been going on for several weeks, yet the Scribe refused to go see a doctor until his health took a sudden turn for the worse.Yesterday, he was found unconscious at his desk! Fortunately, the General Mahamatra and Light of Kshahrewar were closeby and able to bring him to the Bimarstan before anything worse could happen.”

“Come on now, stop lying. I can see the General Mahamatra helping out like that, but the Light of Kshahrewar? Why would he care about the Scribe? Aren’t they constantly on a warpath with one another? The messaging boards are filled to the brim with their arguments and rumour has it they’ve been rivals since their Academiya days.”

“I swear I'm telling nothing but the truth! The Scribe is in the process of getting the treatment now, they say.”

“Treatment? But wouldn’t that mean he would lose the ability to love forever? There aren't many other treatments for that kind of disease. Unless his feelings are requited, of course, but I assume the problem wouldn’t be ours to discuss right now if that were the case.”

“Come on now, we’re talking about the Scribe here. You can’t expect those insane academics to care about much more than their research. For people like him, feelings are nothing but an obstacle. Who knows, maybe he’s even glad to lose the ability to love. One less thing to worry about.”

“You're right, you're right. Still, it's a bit of a shame, don't you think so?”

When Cyno and Kaveh found him in his office, he was slumped over his desk next to several documents now ruined by his blood and the petals that were stuck to each and every page. If you were to ask Alhaitham about it, he would most certainly tell you that little was lost that day as all applications present were both poorly written and hardly remarkable. Alhaitham was just about conscious enough to tell Cyno and Kaveh exactly so while they tried to pry him off his chair. They ended up carrying him to the Bimarstan, Alhaitham’s right arm slung over Cyno’s shoulder, the left one over Kaveh’s as he drifted in and out of consciousness.

Now, several hours later, he was lying on a hospital bed, book in hand and nose buried inside. He was hooked to a machine that monitored his heartbeat and filled the room with a steady beeping sound. The blanket had been discarded and he was lying on the bare mattress, one leg crossed over the other, as if the sole usage of it would be an admittance of vulnerability he didn’t care to make. His relaxed pose made him look much more like a man enjoying his day off rather than a patient in dire need of care. And perhaps that was exactly how he wanted to be perceived. The only sign telling tales of Alhaitham’s sickness was his appearance. The bags under his eyes were pronounced and whenever he spoke, there was a harsh rasp to his voice.

After all, the rumours were true. Alhaitham’s lungs were infected with sharp roots ready to tighten their hold. The disease was rare, but certainly not unheard of. It was of a fantastical kind, illogical and unforgiving in the eye of hidden love; an ailment that tended to befall those blessed with dendro visions.

The curtain hiding the hospital bed from the public eye was pulled to the side with care, the rattling of the hooks loud in the otherwise silent room. A blond head of hair came into view and Kaveh threw Alhaitham a strange look as he thrust a glass of water towards him. Before Alhaitham’s fingers could come to touch it, the words already started to tumble out of Kaveh's mouth.

“So you’re finally awake again, huh?”

For a short moment Alhaitham lifted his eyes off the page to muster him, one eyebrow raised. “Clearly,” he simply stated before turning his gaze back towards the book. Admittedly, he had stopped paying attention to the words on the page the moment Kaveh entered the room. Not that he could stay focused with the way his head was pulsating anyway.

“Don’t you have anything else to say, Alhaitham? Really, nothing?!”

When he received no answer, Kaveh let out a breath of air, collecting himself as he straightened his shoulders. “Sure, if you insist on staying quiet, then I can talk to myself just fine. Not like that’s anything new,” he muttered to himself. Kaveh placed the glass he was still holding down and for a moment, his gaze wandered across the hospital bed, a pensive expression on his face until he decided to sit down on the edge of the bed. “I know we’ve had our share of ups and downs, but I at least expected you to tell me when you’re… oh, I don’t know, actively dying?! You should’ve told me, but for some reason you didn’t. Why?” His voice was loud enough to sound throughout the entire room. A few nurses who were just passing by turned their heads, whispering to one another.

“We live together, for god's sake,” he added, a bit softer this time. “Have I not asked time and time again what's been going on with you? You could’ve just told me! But no, you once again decided to keep me in the dark. Am I that much of a stranger to you?”

Alhaitham exhaled through his nose and snapped his book shut. Ignoring Kaveh was not the way to go and his chest was starting to ache. Unfortunately for him, the roots were starting to shift again.

“What good would it have done me? I planned on getting rid of it the moment I found out, my plans simply got derailed by my workload.” Alhaitham finally took the glass of water from where Kaveh had dropped it off and emptied it halfway. The liquid did little to soothe his raw throat and only made him more aware of the problem at hand. “There's no need to make my problem another one of your countless concerns.”

“But…! I could’ve…”

“Done absolutely nothing. The disease is still in the early stages and very treatable. No need to lose sleep over it,” Alhaitham threw in. Quickly, he lifted his arm and coughed into the crook of his elbow. It was quite the uncomfortable feeling, but at least there was no blood this time around.

Kaveh watched him intently and opened his mouth, his words carefully considered. “Well then, will you at least tell me who caused it? You can’t fault me for being curious about what kind of person it takes to unfreeze your stony heart.” It was obvious from his crossed arms to the tight line of his lips that he was feeling bothered by the topic at hand.

Alhaitham’s answer was lying on the tip of his tongue, ready to dart out and cause mayhem. However before he could retort, he was hit by another coughing fit, quickly followed by a sudden wave of dizziness. This time, he was forced to cough harder and for much longer. When he breathed in, there was a rumbling in his chest that he knew far too well. He dropped his book and placed one hand against the mattress to straighten his back and steady himself when suddenly, a thick stream of blood started to run down his nose. Alhaitham coughed again, one hand darting up to cover both his nose and mouth for damage control. The glass of water tipped over and shattered on the ground.

“Oh gods, did I make you think of them? I wasn’t-” Kaveh looked towards the door, eyes wide with panic. “Doesn’t matter,” he chided himself before hurrying towards the door and sticking his head out into the hallway. “Doctor! We need a doctor in here!”

“I’m fine,” Alhaitham said slowly, his voice muffled by the hand he was still holding over his nose. The blood was dripping down his hand and a droplet escaped, dirtying the white sheets.

“What do you mean you’re fine?! You're bleeding! Shut it and leave the assessment to the experts!” Kaveh hurried over to Alhaitham’s side, his steps hurried yet certain as he began digging through his pockets. Finally, he pulled out a clean handkerchief and leaned down. With one hand, he pulled Alhaitham’s hand away from his face and quickly pressed the handkerchief under his nose instead. His grip on Alhaitham's hand was as reassuring as it was painful and Alhaitham just let him do as he pleased, far too aware of the way Kaveh’s thumb pressed into his palm. The warmth of his hand was soothing against the coldness of his own digits.

A minute passed until Kaveh cleared his throat. “Let them do their job, get the surgery and come back home,” he mumbled. “You've never been one to hesitate.” It was uttered so softly Alhaitham wouldn’t have been able to make it out if it weren’t for their close proximity.

“Look out Kaveh, you almost sounded worried there,” Alhaitham teased, earning him a vexed look. “People might start to think you care for me. We can’t have that now, can we?”

Kaveh pressed the handkerchief harder against Alhaitham’s nose, who shut his eyes tight and made a small sound in response.

“You are infuriating,” Kaveh simply replied. “But for the sake of your health we’ll continue this discussion once you’re feeling better again.”

“Will we now? How kind of you.”

Kaveh took a deep breath. “I am trying to be the bigger person here, so stop trying to rile me up!”

Alhaitham almost had to laugh out loud when the realization hit him. Just like everyone else, Kaveh too was certain he would simply get the roots removed, willing to move on with his life as if nothing ever happened. As if he would never even consider any other choice. And why would anyone assume otherwise? Alhaitham rarely ever portrayed himself to be sentimental or particularly romantic. He was rarely perceived as what could be considered a regular human being. A cold man devoid of emotion, driven purely by undeniable logic, that's what they called him. Of course everyone would assume he’d simply rid himself of the ability to love at the drop of a hat.

Alhaitham lifted his head and mustered Kaveh, taking note of the vibrant colour of his eyes, committing them to memory. “The surgery,” he started, allowing truth to bleed through his words. “Let’s play devil's advocate and assume I come back changed, different. What would you do then?”

Kaveh tilted his head and lifted an eyebrow. “Because of the love thing? Come on Alhaitham, it’s not like you’ve ever had any of that left for me. Or anyone else, if we’re being honest now.” Kaveh threw him a small smile. “What are you doing, trying to discuss rhetoric with me? You’ll be fine. Not even a disease like this could change your ill temper. You'll be right back to your regular unbearable self.” He dappled the tissue under Alhaitham's nose again and sighed when it still came back bloody. For a moment, Alhaitham selfishly allowed himself to be fretted over.

They were interrupted by the door being pushed open and finally, a doctor entered the room.

“You called?”

“Thank god! Yes, I did. I don’t know what happened, he suddenly started coughing and bleeding from his nose again!“

The doctor mustered Alhaitham over the top of his moon-shaped glasses. “Let me take a look, Sir. Please, step aside.”

“Of course!” Quickly, Kaveh pulled back. His hands were hanging by his sides, now useless, the bloodied handkerchief crumpled up in his fist. Kaveh found himself unsure of what to do now that he couldn't help anymore, but found himself even more so unable to step away.

The doctor took out a stethoscope, pushing it past the hospital gown against Alhaitham's chest. While he listened to his breathing, he threw Kaveh a quick glance. “Spouse?”

“Who? Me?!” Kaveh’s eyes were darting from Alhaitham to the doctor and back. “No, I'm his…” The awkwardness hung heavy in the air when he paused to think. “I’m his…”

“Friend,” Alhaitham offered. “He's an old friend.”

Kaveh's eyes widened and the doctor simply nodded. “Please leave the room then. I would like to go over the treatment plan with the patient now. I can assure you that for now, he is doing okay. He’s in capable hands after all.”

Kaveh took an uncertain step away from them. “Of course,” he said politely. Then, he threw Alhaitham one last look and opened his mouth before closing it again.

“Go home, Kaveh.”

After having taken several steps towards the door, he turned around one last time. “You get well soon,” he finally settled on before leaving.

Alhaitham turned towards the doctor. A bone-stirring cough rippled through his body as soon as the door had fallen shut again. After a moment, he managed to calm his breathing. “Well. What's the plan, doctor?”

The doctor threw Alhaitham a knowing look before putting aside the stethoscope and reaching for Alhaitham's chart, thumbing through page after page. “I come with good news. We can squeeze you in for an early appointment to get the roots cleared tomorrow. Of course we'd explain the whole procedure in detail to you beforehand, but I assume you're familiar with the side effects of the surgery already? Nausea, brain fog, difficulties breathing, numbing of emotions towards the illness's source.”

Alhaitham propped himself up further and stared at the wall opposite him, slowly following all the little cracks and bumps with his eyes as he came to his final decision. “That won’t be necessary,” he said slowly. “I changed my mind. I’m not doing it.”

The doctor’s expression was a mask, cool and undisturbed, still like a painting. He opened his mouth. “Sir, it’s a rather safe procedure, are you certain that-”

“I am very certain. I am perfectly aware of the repercussions, so there's no need to explain them to me again.”

“As your doctor I have a duty-”

“That I’m relieving you of. I will agree to stay another two days for monitoring, but that is all I will allow to happen. I'm not getting the procedure, that is my final decision.” Alhaitham crossed his arms and let his gaze wander. Now that he'd put his decision out in the world, for a moment he felt a certain kind of serenity soothe his mind. A bird flew past the window and for Alhaitham the conversation was over, buried five feet under.

There was nothing beautiful about death. Undeniably, it would be a painful affair for him, while others were rewarded a quick ending instead. Perhaps someone as romantically inclined as Kaveh would be able to find a kind of beauty in it that Alhaitham’s pragmatic mind was unable to see. This thought was as much a joke as it was a lifeline to him.

When Alhaitham was released from the hospital, he felt worse for wear. There was little the doctors could do without his consent for the surgery, so they'd surveyed his state, estimated the time he had left and given him pain-soothing meds. He had a month, maybe three left if he was lucky and were to keep his distance. Considering how Kaveh was his roommate and around him more often than not, he assumed one month was the more realistic estimation out of the two.

One month. One month was all he had left to keep living with Kaveh. One more month of arming his words with jabs and pricks, since that was the only language Kaveh trusted enough to remain in place, his need to run satiated by carrot and stick.

Alhaitham was standing in front of their front door, key in hand. For a moment, he pondered about what to say, how to explain a decision that would seem idiotic to anyone who couldn't take a peek inside his mind. Would Kaveh come to accept it or would he start yelling at him for his stubbornness?

Eventually, Alhaitham lifted his key, ready to unlock the door and let himself in. Just as he was about to do so, the door swung open by itself and he was pulled inside, suddenly finding himself face to face with his frazzled looking roommate.

Kaveh's hair was a mess and the bags under his eyes were deep-set and more pronounced than usual. Presumably, he'd spent the night chipping away at another one of his projects, desperate to hit an impossible deadline just so he didn’t have to ask for an extension. He mustered Alhaitham from head to toe, his hands planted firmly on his shoulders. “You don't look all that different,” he said in lieu of a greeting, sounding a bit out of breath.

“A good morning to you too,” Alhaitham replied as he pushed past him. “Well, what did you expect me to look like? I'm curious, enlighten me.” He walked over to the kitchen and sat down. There was a pot of coffee already waiting for him and he poured himself a generous amount. Kaveh must have prepared it for him.

The chair scraped roughly against the kitchen floor as Kaveh pulled it back to sit down next to him. Without having to look, Alhaitham already knew he was watching him, head cocked and leaning on one hand, his gaze probing. “Why are you asking me that? Didn’t I ask you a question? Just answer me!”

Alhaitham sipped on his coffee. It wasn't bitter enough. Kaveh rarely ever used enough beans, insisting on how the package would last longer that way. Sometimes Alhaitham would end up using more beans than usual, thus eradicating all of Kaveh’s efforts. They’d had the same argument over it for the past six months.

When Kaveh realized that he had no intent to answer him, he sighed loudly. His tone softened and he put his right hand flat onto the table, leaning forward ever so slightly. “I guess you just look… more tired than usual.” There was uncertainty in his eyes. “Are you alright?”

Alhatham scoffed as he watched Kaveh from behind his coffee cup. “I couldn’t be better.“

“You just got out of major surgery! How could you be fine? Why did they think it was a good idea to release you this early to begin with?!”

Alhaitham took another sip and decided to let Kaveh’s assumption remain incorrect. He shouldn't have to burden himself with the knowledge that Alhaitham’s time was running out with every touch, every breath shared in the same vicinity. Kaveh had already carried enough burdens for a lifetime.

He didn't know how much more his sturdy shoulders could take.

“Well,” he started. “A feeling of fatigue was to be expected, but I should be good to go in no time. I believe Lesser Lord Kusanali has been waiting for me already. It seems like the Sage’s seat has remained empty for the time being.”

Kaveh shifted his head to the other side as if a new angle would give him some fresh insight into Alhaitham‘s mind. Finally, he tutted his teeth.

“Aren't you the one who always insists that I shouldn't overwork myself? But when you do it it's suddenly fine. Ugh, whatever! Why should I spend even more energy worrying about someone who doesn't even appreciate it! Your dismissive behaviour drives me up the wall!“

He stormed out of the room and Alhaitham coughed into the crook of his elbow.

This was how he wanted to remember Kaveh. Emotional, short-tempered when in Alhaitham’s presence, and most of all, free from the burden of Alhaitham’s feelings on his conscience. After all, solely Alhaitham could be blamed for them. In combination with his uncanny bluntness, they were the only thing keeping Kaveh by his side. It would have to do. Alhaitham thought back to the way Kaveh’s eyes widened when he called him his friend and coughed harder. It would simply have to do.

Alhaitham shot up from his bed, his forehead beading with sweat and his heart thumping viciously. The dream he'd just awoken from hadn't been a nightmare per se, but had been uncalled for nonetheless. It was an unruly thing, incomprehensible and jumpy in nature. Visions of carmine eyes and blonde hair were still fresh in his mind, haunting both waking and sleeping hours. This wasn't the first time he'd dreamed of Kaveh, and realistically speaking, it wouldn't be the last time.

It seemed like not even his dreams were kind enough to spare him from what he could never attempt to pursue.

Was sharing a home not enough? He'd certainly hoped it would be.

Slowly, Alhaitham sat up. He was nauseous. An unhinged part of his brain tried to urge him to get up and cross the distance between their rooms so he could wake Kaveh and ask to be cared for and pampered before it was too late. This, however, he would never attempt.

So Alhaitham rose from his bed and went to the bathroom instead. After several handfuls of water, he lifted his head from the sink, pearls of water dripping down his chin. His reflection in the mirror looked quite the mess.

For a moment, he imagined Kaveh would walk up to him and hug him from behind, his lips a whisper against the nape of his neck. But that was all it was, wishful thinking. Slowly, he gritted his teeth, one hand rising to rub the hallucinations out of his eyes. Alhaitham felt his lungs tighten again. He lowered his hand until it came to cover his mouth and took a deep breath through his nose. His skin felt sickly warm against the palm of his hand.

It would take him several hours until he was able to return to his room again.

There was a knock on their front door.

“Alhaitham! Door!” Kaveh shouted from his room. “The door! Go get it!”

Alhaitham was sitting on the bathroom floor, one hand gripping onto the sink as he spilled flowers and leaves into the toilet bowl, quiet enough for Kaveh to miss. Their guest would have to wait. It's not like he was expecting anyone, so it was really their fault for arriving without prior notice. His nose was bleeding again and even paper towels did little to stop the flow.

“Alhaitham! You know damn well I-” He could hear Kaveh cursing quietly, followed by hurried steps crossing the living room. The sound of their front door being opened came shortly after.

“Hello? Oh! It's you! What are you doing here?”

A voice Alhaitham could barely make out, followed by quick conversation.

“I'll go get him, come on in.” Kaveh again.

Alhaitham spit the remaining bits of petals into the bowl and flushed them down. He wiped the blood off to his best abilities before opening the bathroom door. He almost collided with Kaveh, who already had one hand raised ready to knock. His hair was pulled into a makeshift ponytail and there were streaks of paint splattered all over his face.

“You have a visitor,” he said, slightly out of breath. “He's waiting in the living room.” Kaveh took a quick look at Alhaitham and his expression dropped. “Alhaitham, you-”

Alhaitham nodded and pushed past him without saying another word, hoping the scent of flowers wasn't clinging to his skin. The scent seemed to be permanently stuck in his nose, inescapable and nauseating.

Kaveh threw him a searching look before slowly retreating towards his own room again. If he wanted to comment on Alhaitham's silent refusal to get the door, he most definitely pushed it aside for when they were alone again.

When Alhaitham entered the living room, he was faced with someone he'd never expected to see infiltrating the comfort of his home.

“Well, well, well. Look who’s still kicking. Acting Grand Sage, how has the surgery been treating you? Not all that well considering how you haven't actually gone through with it,” the young man taunted. He was lounging on one of the divans, one arm leaning against the backrest, his hat discarded on his lap and his head tipped back, never one to sugarcoat his words.

Alhaitham's mood soured on impact. “Wanderer. Did Lesser Lord Kusanali send you?”

In the grand scheme of things, Wanderer was something akin to a coworker once removed, as they had been made to work together under Nahida’s kind rule numerous times before.

“What do you think? That I came for the ravishing talks and your enjoyable personality? I believe you're aware that I’m not one for pleasantries.”

“No one is forcing you to be here. The door is right there. I’d offer you tea, but I really don't see why i should do that.”

“Don't bother, Grand Sage.”

“Acting Grand Sage,” Alhaitham threw in.

“I'm only here to survey your state and give Nahida a report. She has also given me a message to deliver.”

“And what would that be?”

“Stop screwing around,” Wanderer said, his gaze probing.

“Your words, not hers, I assume?” Alhaitham retorted. “Well, you can tell her that this is none of her business regardless.”

A frown, snarky and cold, made its way onto Wanderer’s face. “You think Nahida doesn't care that her favourite little pawn has set off on a suicide mission for the sake of love? It’s almost charming how far you underestimate her levels of meddling.” Wanderer let himself fall back onto the divan, his eyes set on the ceiling. “To think that you of all people would fall for such lowly affections. Maybe you are more ordinary than first expected after all.” He blew out a breath of air and rolled his eyes. “How boring.”

Alhaitham crossed his arms and stared down at Wanderer, who was staring right back up at him. Neither said another word.

Wanderer was the first to break the silence. “You really think your little architect will reciprocate your feelings before it's too late? Are you dense or just stupid? Fate is rarely known to be generous.”

“It's quite easy, actually. I don't,” he answered, his voice firm with conviction. “Are you finished now?”

“As finished as you'll soon be.” A short bark escaped the Wanderer’s lips and Alhaitham realized belatedly that the sound must've been laughter.

“There are many people after you. If they find out how impaired you really are, pray tell what will happen then? Count yourself warned.” A moment passed by and he sat upright again, tutting his teeth. “Perhaps this is farewell, Grand Sage? And by the way, you reek of mourning flowers. Do something about it.”

With that he jumped up and headed for the door. He turned around one last time, his hand hovering near the doorknob. “I never took you for a fool, but it seems I was wrong.”

“And you are invested in human affairs since when?”

“I am not. I simply do as I’m told.”

With that, he left. As soon as the door fell shut, Alhaitham heard Kaveh emerge from his room again. He peered past the doorway and mustered Alhaitham with crossed arms.

“What was that about? I didn't think you had anything to do with that guy after the Interdarshan Championships passed.”

“Lesser Lord Kusanali sent him,” Alhaitham explained shortly.

Kaveh's eyebrows knit together in confusion. “You're trying to tell me Lesser Lord Kusanali sent Hat Guy? Have you taken leave of your senses?”

“Oh, you didn't know? He's her little henchman.”

Kaveh's mouth fell open in surprise. “And you didn't think to tell me?! For how long have you- You know what, nevermind! I won't even bother!” Kaveh shook his head and pushed his fists into his hips. “Well, what did he want?”

“Nahida sent him to check up on my recovery. I told him I'm fine.”

“Are you though?” The words came out clipped, but Kaveh's eyes looked strangely honest. “Are you really fine, Alhaitham? You were pale as a ghost when you left the bathroom.”

“Why shouldn't I be?” he replied casually, his tone nonchalant. Then, he decided to poke the bear. “Maybe you should worry about yet another person having found out about your living arrangements rather than think about trivialities.”

Kaveh’s eyes widened and he leaned back a bit. “You think he'd tell?!” His voice rose several pitches and his cheeks turned lively. It was fun seeing him huff and puff.

“He is quite the malicious soul. Who knows what he might do,” he finally concluded as he leaned his chin against his hand, the slight pull of the corner of his mouth hidden behind his hand. The teasing seemed to serve its purpose. Kaveh breathed in deeply, one accusing finger lifted to go off at his roommate. Alhaitham tasted mourning flowers on his tongue as he slipped on his soundproof earpieces, carefully massaging his sternum.

Whatever insult Kaveh chose to hurl his way was drowned out by the familiar sound of pink noise.

Alhaitham was sorting through proposal after proposal, putting the scarce good ones on a pile to his left, the insultingly bad ones on a pile to his right. Work today was quiet, mundane. Nobody had tried to push their bad proposal in person just yet, which was a win in his books. He was glad to be able to do what was expected from him as the Akademiya’s Scribe rather than be stuck in another stuffy meeting representing the Acting Grand Sage. Alternating between the jobs was demanding, yet exactly what he needed to keep his thoughts clear and his mind occupied.

The brain fog caused by his illness was quickly starting to become an issue. Hiding it however, was an easy affair as Kaveh chose to interpret his newfound forgetfulness as deliberate malice. After all, deceiving someone who tended to find hostility and ill will in each and every one of your actions was quite the simple feat.

The roots in his chest shifted slowly, painfully and he rubbed his collarbone. Alhaitham opened yet another proposal, the letter opener cutting through the envelope smoothly. As he pulled out a letter instead of a proposal sticking to the strict Akademiya guidelines, all correct fonts and paragraph spacings, he stopped in his tracks. There were letters, taken from newspaper cuttings, spelling out two simple sentences.

“Do not consider yourself safe, Grand Sage. Our eyes are everywhere, and they are trained on you.” There was a photo attached to it with a paperclip. The picture was a snapshot, presumably taken of him right as he left the Bimarstan, patient file in hand. Alhaitham sighed as he put down both letter and photo, turning them over to look for any hint that could tip him off as to who had sent the threatening letter. There was nothing else to take note of. He leaned his head against his hand and sighed.

Although he hated to admit it, it seemed like Wanderer had been right after all. For a moment, Alhaitham considered bringing it to Nahida, but swiftly decided against it. He would deal with this by himself. Unnecessary coddling and worrying was the last thing he needed right now. All he wanted to do was go home and enjoy a cup of coffee brewed too lightly.

The roots in his lungs had been behaving quite well today. Perhaps the distance to Kaveh was what his body relished in, yet his mind failed to strive for after all. A quick look at the clock told him that finally, it was time to leave. Alhaitham pulled on his coat, the proposals long forgotten on the table already, delayed for yet another day to come. After a moment of consideration, he pocketed the letter. This was an issue for another day, yet he couldn't risk his replacement finding it.

Alhaitham was quick to leave his office on time before anybody could even think about bothering him past his work hours.

The bazaar was bustling with the sounds of the people of Sumeru, excited with the end of corporate hours and the beginning of their dearly awaited free time, accompanied by the cooling winds of night.

Alhaitham’s walking slowed as he passed a stall selling little trinkets, decorative items that would look good against the backdrop of his library. If he were to buy one or two, Kaveh would certainly have a fit. A smile lingered on his lips as he considered taking a little wood carving home to add to his collection. He turned it over in his hands and came to the conclusion that Kaveh would despise it. Alhaitham pulled out his coin pouch and rewarded the seller accordingly. As soon as the transaction was complete and the wood carving safely stored away, his chest tightened and a wet cough broke free, only suppressed by his elbow pressed tightly against his mouth to muffle the sounds. The vendor threw him a worried look.

Alhaitham’s breathing refused to calm. As soon as he tasted blood on his tongue, he retreated into a deserted alley where he would be free to cough his heart out. It wasn't pretty, but he’d certainly had worse attacks. There was a flower stuck in his throat, and he found himself struggling for air. Only removing it would soothe his bruised lungs. When he finally managed to pull it free it fell to the ground with a loud splat. Finally, he was able to breathe again.

“Well look at this,” a voice suddenly growled, rough yet quiet. “If it isn't the Grand Sage.”

He felt something sharp press into his side.

“So the rumours are true, you are sick after all.”

“Perhaps you shouldn't occupy yourself with the people's talk so much if you still don't know that I am not more than the Acting Grand Sage,” Alhaitham replied coolly.

“Cocky, aren't we? Let's see how long that will last.” The woman leaned closer, her lips inches away from Alhaitham's ear. Her whisper was callous, cruel. She smelled like earth and gunpowder. “Maybe we’ll go to your home and pay that precious little architect friend of yours a visit right after. I wonder if he bleeds red just like the rest of us.”

Although his expression did not show it, Alhaitham's blood ran cold. “You're really insistent on ruining my evening, aren't you? Guess I'll have to make things uncomfortable for you now too.”

The woman pushed the knife harder against his side and Alhaitham could feel it breaking skin. Apparently, she didn't appreciate his answer very much. Perhaps she'd expected a more fearful response.

“Ambush him!” she then yelled, her eyes never leaving Alhaitham to stand unsupervised. There was a sudden and sharp push against his abdomen as the woman darted forward.

All of a sudden, five other people emerged from the shadows.

Treasure Hoarders.

Alhaitham spat out a mouthful of blood before he summoned his swords and straightened his stance.

Slowly, Alhaitham lifted his key to the lock, his hand straining under the effort of trying to keep the shaking to a minimum.

The fight had been long and unfair, as fights in Sumeru often tended to be. If Alhaitham had been at the peak of his health, perhaps he wouldn't have gotten hurt. Now, his abdomen felt like someone had tried to set it aflame. There was nothing more than a single door keeping him separated from the safety of his own home where he’d finally be able to patch himself up in peace. The knowledge that Kaveh wouldn't be there to witness his pitiful arrival soothed at least one of his ever mutiplying worries. It was Friday night and there was no way he'd miss the happy hour at Lambad’s Tavern, not when Tighnari and Cyno had invited them both out. Naturally, Alhaitham had been quick to decline, leaving Kaveh to go by himself.

Finally, he managed to unlock the door and stumbled inside. While one hand remained pressed to his abdomen, he was using the other to lean onto the wall for support. Alhaitham breathed out through his nose and braced himself for the pain that was certain to follow. He straightened his back and pushed himself up again, clenching his teeth. After he managed to pull the door shut, his ring of keys slipped from his hold. The sound it made when hitting the ground echoed through the entire house.

“Alhaitham?” With a click, the light turned on and Alhaitham found himself standing face to face with Kaveh, who was right in front of him with crossed arms and an unreadable expression. He was wearing a tank top covered in splashes of paint and a smear of green ran across his cheek. Alhaitham had the sudden urge to trace it with his fingertips, smudge it against his cheekbone down towards the corner of his mouth. Perhaps that was the blood loss speaking after all. It seemed like Kaveh hadn’t noticed the state he was in just yet, and he’d prefer to keep it that way.

For once, Alhaitham had nothing to say, so he simply ignored his roommate and walked further into the room.

“Where have you been?” Kaveh’s voice echoed through the hall. His tone was guarded and for once, Alhaitham couldn’t take it. He simply passed his roommate, one hand ghosting past his shoulder for the smallest of moments. His knuckles brushed over the bone connecting Kaveh’s shoulder to his collarbone. “Work,” he replied curtly. The word came out sounding much more quiet than intended. Alhaitham couldn't tell anymore how much time had passed between Kaveh’s question and his answer. The blood loss was making his head dizzy, his thoughts uncharacteristically jumbled. Hopefully, Kaveh would be too invested in his project to notice.

Before he could pass him, Kaveh’s hand wrapped around his wrist, successfully pulling it away from his abdomen. “Hey. You really think I’d believe you of all people would be putting in the work when you’re already off the clock? Try again.”

“I don’t recall being obligated to report my whereabouts to you.”

Kaveh tutted his tongue. “You don’t think I can tell that something is going on? I know y-”

Now that there was nothing left to stop the bleeding, it began to drip further down until it hit the ground. Without wanting to, Alhaitham’s gaze followed the traces it left. Kaveh stopped in his tracks, his eyes wandering down towards the ground as well. For a second, neither of them moved. Kaveh’s eyes wandered up to Alhaitham’s face and his lips parted in shock.

“This is..” Before he could finish his sentence, Alhaitham began to falter. Thankfully, Kaveh was quick enough to support him before he could hit the ground. “What the hell! What happened?!”

“Small wound. Hardly worth mention- ugh!” Alhaitham doubled over and Kaveh slid one arm around his back to pull him further up.

“What do you mean hardly worth mentioning, you're bleeding profusely! Come on, let's get you to the bathroom.”

One hand closed around Kaveh's bicep. “It's fine,” he grunted out.

“Fine my ass. Do you really want me to start discussing semantics with you now?!”

Alhaitham made a noncommittal noise in reply and let himself be led. Not that he had much of a choice now that the cat was out of the bag.

Once they reached the bathroom Kaveh carefully lowered him onto the ground, propping him up against the side of the bathtub. He turned on the light and rummaged through one of the cabinets for their first aid supplies.

When he turned back around again, Alhaitham’s head was tilted towards the ceiling, his breathing heavy.

“Hey.” Kaveh snapped his fingers to get his roommate's attention. “Show me the wound.”

Wordlessly, Alhaitham shrugged his coat aside to reveal the deep stab wound. “It's not that bad-”

Kaveh pushed the palm of his hand against his forehead, applying pressure. “Not as bad?! Take it off.”

“Take what off? You have got to be more specific.”

“Your shirt. Off with it.”

Alhaitham was feeling more loopy with every second that passed. “Do it for me if you need it off that badly.” A small smile spread over his lips. It was easier to taunt than to admit that he was very close to passing out and couldn't handle the wound by himself.

“You are infuriating,” Kaveh murmured, an annoyed tone to his voice as he grabbed the underside of Alhaitham's shirt and carefully pulled it up. It made a squelching sound when he pulled it past the deep gash and Kaveh flinched.

“Lift your arms.”

Alhaitham did as he was told and not soon after, he was sitting shirtless, the cold air of the night almost soothing where it hit his sickly warm skin.

“Good grief,” Kaveh mumbled, letting his fingertips run along Alhaitham's torso. “This isn't just a small nick, somebody stabbed you!”

Kaveh's eyes went from the wound back to their first aid kit. “I have to call Tighnari,” he decided quickly. Strangely, it seemed like he was starting to panic.

“It's the middle of the night.”

“And he's our best bet. He's at Cyno’s right now. You stay right here.”

With that, Kaveh was gone. The afterthought of his fingertips still lingered against Alhaitham's skin and he sighed. Slowly, he looked down. The wound was angry and red, the memory of a rusty dagger sliding in still fairly vivid in his mind. Carefully, he tried to prop himself up. When the pain had him doubling over and the wound leaked even more blood, he gave up.

Kaveh returned a few minutes later, the look in his eyes panicked as he quickly washed and disinfected his hands before turning back around to his roommate. He pressed one hand against Alhaitham's cheek. The touch felt soothing against his clammy skin and he pressed his cheek into it.

“I need you to lie down,” Kaveh mumbled and Alhaitham noticed the way his hands were shaking like leaves.

Kaveh grabbed onto his shoulders and pulled him down slowly, carefully. He shielded the back of his head with his hand to prevent any further injuries. Once he was down, he pushed a pillow under Alhaitham's feet to elevate them.

Alhaitham looked up at him. “You surely do realize this is all unnecessary?” he wheezed out.

“Just stop talking,” Kaveh answered, teeth clenched as he put on a pair of gloves. “I'm going to apply pressure to your wound,” he said in warning.

Alhaitham let out a groan as Kaveh's hand pushed against the sensitive skin. “Playing nurse, are we? Perhaps you missed your calling after all.”

“I’ll kill you once you feel better again.”

“Oh, I believe you will.” The words slipped out of his mouth as he had no intention of keeping them there. There was no way for Kaveh to know just how right he was.

“What's that supposed to mean?!”

Slowly, Alhaitham closed his eyes, letting out a shallow breath. “Nothing for you to worry about,” he mumbled to himself.”

“Oh god, you're dying. The Alhaitham I know would never say something like that. How many fingers am I holding up?”

Quickly, Kaveh lifted his hand. Alhaitham let out a ragged breath and lifted his own hand shakily as well, tapping his pointer against each and every finger. “Five,” he answered, then intertwined his fingers with Kaveh’s before he even had the chance to realise what was going on.

There was one good thing about bleeding out from a stab wound: For once, Alhaitham didn't feel the strain in his lungs as his breathing was shallow regardless. He opened his eyes again and thought that if he were to make it through the night, he would most certainly regret a lot of the things he said while on the brink of unconsciousness.

Kaveh's left hand was still putting pressure on the wound, while the right was all Alhaitham's. He pulled it closer to his chest and held it right where his lungs tended to strain the most. A small smile ran past his lips and unexpectedly, he began to laugh until the sound turned into several bloody coughs. It was a weak thing, and Kaveh startled.

“Just hold on a little longer, I- I've got you,” he said, tightening his grip on Alhaitham's hand where he kept it pressed against his chest, his voice breaking. “Wait, I think I heard something. That must be Tighnari, just-”

Alhaitham's world faded to black. The last thing he saw were Kaveh’s glassy eyes, flitting nervously from side to side. When he opened his mouth again, the words he was trying to convey remained unheard.

When Alhaitham came back to his senses, his body felt heavy and sluggish.There was a familiar weight pressed against his side, which would at least explain why he was feeling particularly weighed down. Slowly, he opened his eyes.

To his left was a window. It was currently dark out, the room illuminated by several small candles. In the warm light, the next thing he saw was a golden head of hair by his side, knocked out cold on the mattress. Kaveh was still kneeling on the ground, however his upper body was draped across the mattress, his cheek resting against Alhaitham's thigh. One of his hands was wrapped around his wrist, the hold on Alhaitham's hand warm and reassuring. Alhaitham didn't understand how anyone could fall asleep in a position like that in the first place.

Slowly, he let his gaze drop. His stomach was wrapped in clean bandages and through the heavy veil of medicine, he reached out his hand. His chest ached with a want he had grown used to over the years. Today however, it seemed to be particularly strong.

Alhaitham reached out and put his free hand on top of Kaveh's head, rubbing it from left to right and effectively messing up his hair. Kaveh awoke with a grumble, his cheek now squished even closer against Alhaitham's thigh as he turned his head, his eyes still shut tight. “What do you think you're doing?” he grumbled. “Hands off.” He lazily swatted at Alhaitham’s hand, then raised his head frantically when he finally came back to his senses.

“You're awake!” he exclaimed.

Alhaitham pressed his hand further against Kaveh's head, rubbing it from side to side again as he complained. Kaveh grabbed his hand by the wrist and lifted his head, cheeks red and eyes glistening. “You! I have some choice words for you! What were you thinking?!” His pointer was placed right over Alhaitham's pulse point and he was certain if he were to pay proper attention to it, he would be able to feel it thrumming against his skin. Wildly, vividly, longingly.

“It wasn't as bad as you make it out to be. Let's not act like this is the first time I've been stabbed.”

“Not as bad?!” His voice rose several octaves. “You were delirious from blood loss! You could've died!! You could be dead now you stupid ape of a man and you would’ve bled out on our living room floor!”

Another voice joined him, much calmer in tone. “Kaveh, calm down and let him live. You still have ample time to hold this over his head.” Tighnari entered the room, the expression on his face bemused. “Alhaitham,” he said in lieu of a greeting.

“How are you feeling?”

Kaveh rubbed the back of his hand over his eyes angrily.

Alhaitham nodded his head. “Considering the circumstances, I'm feeling fine.”

Kaveh dropped his hand again to pinch the bridge of his nose instead. “Tighnari! He has lost all senses, say something to him,” he forced out, irritation barely hidden.

At a second glance, Kaveh looked exhausted. His eyes were puffy and his hair was a mess. The clothes he was wearing were unfamiliar, consisting of dark pants and a loose blouse that Tighnari and Cyno had probably lent to him.

Tighnari walked over to the fully stocked shelves and grabbed a vial of dark ointment.

“I'm sure you can do that perfectly well for me, considering how I'm putting him on bedrest until further notice.”

Alhaitham raised an eyebrow. “Now why would that be necessary?”

Before Kaveh could open his mouth again, Tighari returned to them, a finger lifted. “It's necessary,” he unwrapped the bandages to expose the gnarly cut. “Because you just got stabbed. That's your first reason right there. The second reason would be because the knife barely missed your liver. You should be grateful you made it out alive. That's plenty of reasons if you ask me.”

It seemed like his diagnosis wasn't news to Kaveh. While tightening his hold on Alhaitham's hand, he shot him an indecipherable look and nodded. “He will rest Tighnari, I’ll make sure of that.”

“Not if you end up breaking my hand as well.”

Kaveh gasped and turned back around to Tighnari, dropping Alhaitham's hand as if it were hot coal. “Do you see how he behaves around me? This is what I’m always talking about!”

A deep sigh left Tighnari's lips. “Kaveh…” he simply said before turning back around to his bottles and tinctures.

Alhaitham raised an eyebrow at Kaveh and stuck out his tongue.

“Tighnari! You must’ve seen that!”

“How old are you two again?” He returned to Alhaitham and Kaveh, now several bottles in hand. “Here's his medicine. Just make sure he takes it and gets some proper rest.” When he found Kaveh still staring at Alhaitham, arms crossed, he repeated his name. “Kaveh.”

“Yes. I'll look after him.”

Perhaps, fate was trying to meddle in their affairs after all. Whether that would be a blessing or a curse, only time would be able to tell.

#fanfiction #my writing #genshin impact #haikaveh #kavetham #kaveh x alhaitham #angst #hurt/comfort #hanahaki disease #alhaitham gets stabbed #the usual #sorry for possibly shitty formatting this was posted on mobile

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dreamsy990 · 1 month

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my laptops like super fucking dead and its gonna be a couple days before i can get a new one so uh. have a ghost roxas au doodle from procreate instead. returning to my roots i suppose. do not ask me to explain the story context for this or whats going on because i will not explain ok. you can figure it out yourself <-( theres absolutely not enough information for you to figure it out for yourself )

#doodles #kingdom hearts #sora #roxas #ghost roxas au #my goal is to make a story as hard to understand as kh lore itself #aka not that complicated but people love being dramatic about it #eheh #anyways man on one hand i would love to tell this story as just a comic. bc i think im better at storytelling visually #but also i. really like writing shitty prose #idk ive written an absurd amount for this au #idk if youre at all even interested in this au lemme know if youd prefer a comic or a fic #if i do a fic id probably do art to go with it #sigh idk sticking to one feels really limiting to me #bc i dont think i can like. convey the emotions id like to do with just a comic #but i also naturally feel a bit more inclined to do a visual format since im more comfortable than that #with that* sorry im tired #idk maybe i could do a comic w some optional stuff to read as a supplement #i wish there was an easier way to mix the formats #anyways idk if anyone even cares about this au its mostly a self indulgent little project for me #but if you do care lmk #ok i have to get up early so im gonna. go to sleep. <- lying

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lovecanbesostrange · 4 months

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#X-Men #Mystique #Irene Destiny Adler #looking for the panel to make this shitty meme reminded me that even when I get nice things I lose #because there is this one moment with the Brotherhood of Evil Mutants and guess who the fuck is missing.........#also sorry I know I broke the official format but look at their gay little handshake

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arvoze · 8 months

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[2/3] HHNFLARTAS - hell hath no fury like a rescue team association scorned

hell hath no fury like a rescue team association scorned not a fic or anything, i just ramble a lot about my pmd ocs in a digestible format that's more or less that kind of content. random yearly event for rescue teams. covers no more than like, one week of VV content

[ 1 / X / 3 ]

hey guys just realised the abbreviation for this says "flartas" this is so embarrassing

hell hath no fury like a rescue team association scorned #2

(sorry this keeps repeating this is just how i organised it all)

and mike's right to worry. it's the team's worst nightmare, for obvious reasons -- it's fire. they're grass. it's a fucking volcanic location. there's no water or anything. they're screwed from the get-go.

but that's the point. you can't always pick and choose where you're headed. sometimes you have to suck it up and get over it and just deal with it. that's the point the RTA try to make, here.

keith's team - well, guildmaster rime, probably, actually - would argue against that. yes, you can't pick and choose all the time, but actually, yes you can, you pick the jobs you can do, and you're an arrogant asshole if you take a job in a place that leaves you at a disadvantage. what are you trying to prove by doing that? just leave it to a team more suited for the job, for the sake of the pokemon that need to be rescued.

right. the pokemon that need to be rescued.

it's a gruelling journey. the team is surviving, barely, always hanging on by a thread, but hey, at least it's a strong thread. it's not a total nightmare for them, for now. but it's going to be. it has to be, because the requirements are to save the rescue and bring something back from the end of the dungeon to "prove" that you completed it (in case the rotom drones aren't watching). their inventory is stacked up enough for this. keith's body is a machine that turns reviver seeds into plain seeds.

moderately deep in - about halfway through the dungeon, which is deep for grass-types - the rescue has been found. keith's team go about the regular procedures: are they injured? are they famished? what kind of help do they need? are they in danger? the rescue is the priority. the rescue is the priority. they're safe, thankfully. they're an "actor", so of course they're safe, but it's mandatory to check anyways - keith's team take this stuff seriously when it matters.

they've got to make a decision. for many teams, they don't have to worry about this. but for keith's team, it's only one way or the other.

take the rescue home, and abandon the latter half of the job (to reach the end), or take the rescue with them to the end -- on a journey they can barely survive themselves, endangering the rescue.

the answer is clear: why not do both?

hell hath no fury[..] #3

why not split the team? one takes the rescue home, the others continue pressing on. this is the logical solution that the three come to.

luwel says that the RTA are probably gonna hate it, but that it's easily justifiable to do. keith and mike are in agreement, because when it comes down to it, the rescue is the priority. two of them can take the fall in a fight if they need to - the rescue got home, which is the most important thing.

like clockwork, a monster house will spawn. they still have the rescue. the RTA can't help it, they love a well-timed monster house.

the team is split using the following thought process:

keith is one of the two that stay in the dungeon. this is a given, both because he's the team leader, and also because he's really, really shit at running away as he's a notoriously slow runner (can you blame him). he is the most physically defensive, as well as the most physically strongest (i mean, mike's strong, too, but a regular punch from keith is gonna be a lot worse than a regular punch from mike).

luwel can be fast, but he's not all that strong. he is, however, the best at problem-solving and adapting to situations as they happen, at least out of the three of them. he's also the one who planned their inventory in advance, so luwel actually knows what's in their bag that can be used for situations like these. he's staying with keith in the dungeon.

mike is fast, can fight off stragglers on the way out, and can also carry the rescue on the way. mike's going to be the one splitting from the team to ensure the safety of the rescue.

mike will take out a few pokemon from the monster house before upping and leaving. he can't risk staying for too long, as unfortunate as that is. he doesn't want to go. he knows the situation. he is terrified for what might happen to the others. but he is reassured, constantly -- not reassured. yelled at, really, in that one way keith sounds when he's serious. go. now. just take them and fucking go. despite how long they've been on the job together, it's not a side of keith that the other two see often.

mike's gone. the rescue is gone, too. it's just down to keith and luwel now. oh, christ, it's down to keith and luwel, who are already drained at this point, surrounded by fire types, in quite literally the worst place either of them could be in. the realisation is starting to dawn. gears are turning in luwel's head. the same can't be said for keith, but that's to be expected.

thank xerneas one of them knows how to prepare for the worst.

hell hath no fury[..] #4

keith does what he can to take a few of them out, but the exhaustion is really starting to kick in. he can only take so many more hits, under this heat, and bless luwel for being there with him but he's not exactly pulling his weight in a two-on-who-knows-what -- they're tired, drained, dehydrated, everything. they're probably even wilting at this point, the poor bastards.

luwel has a last resort, per the norm. years of the worried and paranoid "what if" scenarios playing in your head before every possible adventure will do that to you. he'd waited until the worst of the worst to use it -- and one could argue that this was as bad as it gets.

he has one singular flood orb, a moderately expensive upgrade to the rainy orb. his ass is not getting compensated for using it by the RTA. whilst the rainy orb generates, well, rain for a short period of time, the flood orb will generate torrential downpour, flooding the floor. overuse could lead to serious disasters in a dungeon, but nobody's got enough money for that. and nobody's got enough balls to ask kyogre to keep upgrading their orbs -- how long had keith had that in storage, anyways? there's not a chance in hell that he's seeking out kyogre ever again.

it's enough. even if it's just a break, it's enough. if keith wasn't the anchor that he is, he'd probably end up getting swept away by the flood that started to form in the room. luwel is holding onto him, of course, whilst keith berates him for using that item, even though he jokes about the fact it's actually fine and he's not mad at all. it's not total garbage water either, which is perfect for keith, because he loves his water absorb ability. it's keith's dungeon now, we're all just exploring in it.

thanks to the water absorption, keith's body has become as resilient as ever - he's slightly larger, now, to accommodate for the water* [note*], and he feels better than ever. better than he was before he even entered the dungeon. he'll take the world on, he doesn't give a shit. luwel is just idly getting by. it's nice to not have to deal with the heat for a little while. the orb fades in his hands, its blue hue transitioning to a dull, deep grey before crumbling to nothing. it was nice while it lasted, he reckons. he'll make a mental note to look for authentic upgrades orbs in the market when the time comes.

most of the monster house is just… swept away to a different part of the dungeon. they can move on, once they've taken their breather. the RTA will probably ban the use of upgraded orbs after this, but modern problems require modern solutions.

hell hath no fury[..] #5

they… get there, in the end. they reach the end of the dungeon. there were further hiccups along the way - luwel's body is a machine that turns reviver seeds into… well, we've heard that one somewhere before. they grab whatever it is that's needed at the end, and then they fuck off. they don't want to be there anymore.

(the details themselves aren't that important… it's just a regular dungeon exploration for the most part. fighting things, taking hits, healing, missing, whatever. all that good stuff. there's no point detailing the actual dungeon stuff itself right now).

mike is finally reunited with the guys. he's been living his best life outside of the dungeon, dealing with normal temperatures and - heaven forbid - a dip in the lake to cool down. mike's doing his best to not laugh about the state his brothers are in. why the fuck are they bald. (they are no longer bald)

it takes a while, but the RTA get back to them with their results. they've got to assess every team that took part, of course, so the waiting period was to be expected. for this particular trial, keith's team was met with, well…

a failure. they didn't pass. it's not something to be demoted over, but it cuts them out of qualifying for the top hundred teams in the continent. they haven't been failed in a good number of years. what gives? they did what they were told, didn't they?

yeah. but it's more intricate than that.

[pt 3.]

*[note; borrowed from swagulousbeing @ twt]

#pmd tagging for archival purposes #pokemon #pokemon mystery dungeon #my art #keith #luwel #mike #i have no commentary to give on this other than the fact i realised that im like #making quick shitty youtube thumbnails LOLLL #sorry my posting format lead me to say the title 50 times #i havent read any of this back all i do is just skin to add bold/italics #oncwe again. this is incredibly boring stuff

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yellobb · 8 months

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For Baby

(a Simon Snow ficlet I had to get out of my system)

Tags: Ruth Salisbury, Lucy Salisbury, Simon Snow, song fic, a mother’s love

Song is For Baby (For Bobbie) by Peter, Paul, and Mary

~ ~ ~

I'll walk in the rain by your side

Ruth smiled down at the little bundle she had just finished dressing for bed.

I'll cling to the warmth of your hand

“There you are, little Lucy. All cozy?”

I'll do anything to keep you satisfied

The baby didn’t respond, too busy staring in wonder at the mobile above her.

And I'll love you more than anybody can

Ruth couldn’t help but lift Lucy into her arms. She rocked her along to the music coming from the radio and hummed along. Lucy grabbed at her fingers.

And the wind will whisper your name to me

“I love you so much, my darling,” she whispered into the soft locks on Lucy’s forehead.

Little birds will sing along in time

Lucy squirmed in her arms and started to cry. Ruth adjusted her grip and gently brushed away her tears.

Leaves will bow down when you walk by

“Hush, Lucy Lou. You’re alright.” She brought Lucy to her chest and continued to rock and sing to her until Lucy fell asleep in her mother’s arms.

And morning bells will chime

I'll be there when you're feeling down

Lucy smiled as she recognized the lullaby her mum used to sing her when she was little playing on the radio.

To kiss away the tears if you cry

She placed a hand on her belly and couldn’t help but feel a swell of joy as she felt a little kick.

I'll share with you all the happiness I've found

“What’re you getting up to in there, Simon?” she giggled out.

A reflection of the love in your eyes

She felt a sudden wave of melancholy come over her. This wasn’t her first Christmas away from her family, but it was harder than before.

And I'll sing you the songs of the rainbow

Lucy bit her lip as she contemplated the phone. She could call her mum. She could tell her about Simon.

A whisper of the joy that is mine

She’d be delighted, Lucy knew. She’d be an amazing grandmum, too. And Jaimie would be the best uncle.

The leaves will bow down when you walk by

She sighed when she felt another kick from her stomach. “Maybe we can call her after Christmas, hm? How does that sound, my little rosebud boy?”

And morning bells will chime

I'll walk in the rain by your side

Simon sat on the couch next to his nan, half dozing to the sound of the radio and the rain outside. He felt her pause in her knitting from where his head rested on her shoulder and cracked an eye open.

I'll cling to the warmth of your tiny hand

She put her needles down and wiped at her eyes. Simon frowned in worry. “Nan?”

I'll do anything to help you understand

“Oh, don’t mind me, Simon. It’s just… I used to sing this song to my Lucy when she was little.”

And I'll love you more than anybody can

Simon didn’t really know how to react. He never really did when it came to his mum.

And the wind will whisper your name to me

“She loved you so much, you know? She couldn’t have done anything but love you. It’s just how us mothers work.”

Little birds will sing along in time

She smiled at him and placed a kiss on his curls. “Grandmothers, too. I love you more than anything, and don’t you dare forget that,” she told him seriously.

Leaves will bow down when you walk by

Simon felt a warmth in his heart that was becoming so familiar these days. “Yeah. I love you too, Nan.”

And morning bells will chime

#m writes #the simon snow series #lucy salisbury #simon snow #ruth salisbury #found out this is my grandma’s favorite lullaby and I’ve been listening to it on loop and crying about it #this was not beta read at all #it’s a first draft but hey #song fic #idk should I post this on AO3?#also hugs to anyone with shitty parents #I hope you find someone who loves you as unconditionally as a parent should #this is my first song fic so sorry if the formatting is weird

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drawingwithgreen13 · 2 years

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Casual sprite edit number 4 babyyyyy

I gotta be honest, I think I’m starting to see an improvement on my style emulating, I think these ones might be my best ones yet (though I’m still a bit iffy on the Junko edit rgheriugh)

I’m also starting to think,,,are there any specific characters y’all want me to make edits of? If so then I’ll choose those ones for my next batch!!

#Danganronpa #Danganronpa Sprite Edit #Kiyotaka Ishimaru #Junko Enoshima #Kaito Momota #Mahiru Koizumi #Angie Yonaga #Teruteru Hanamura #Also super sorry for the shitty formatting I still don't know how to work around that reghriuwgh #Was originally gonna put roses on Teruteru's jacket but that would've been too similar to his beach jacket

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tinypinkmouse · 6 months

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Guardian (and adjacent) WIPs

These are literally the titles of the documents, and yes, I am definitely embarrassed about some of them.

To be edited

These are technically WIPs since they're not posted yet, but they just need a round of editing and podficcing and they're ready to post.

Guardian

first

exchange

Weilan derivatives

Luo Qingeng/Zhang Yuan sequel

WIPs

Guardian

<1k words

deaged SW, <1k, probably weilan and idk maybe twincest (we'll see)

Instead of trying Shen Wei to a pillar Ye Zun decides to turn him the same age(ish) they were when Ye Zun was taken by the rebel leader (see how SW likes being young and helpless and at someone else's mercy). Except then Ye Zun just can't resist tiny, worried gege with his big eyes and needs to protect him (also probably finds out what actually happened in the past, because to de-aged SW it happened recently).

arranged marriage yohe, <1k, weilan, lanzun

Zhao Yunlan ends up in YOHE and stumbles into an existing marriage agreement with the Black Cloaked Envoy… that then instead ends up in a marriage agreement with the Rebel Chief (Ye Zun at that point but they don't know that of course). Everyone is upset, but I guess Zhao Yunlan is doing it for peace and whatnot.

cuddle the enemy, <1k, weilan

AU where Dixing and Haixing are at war. There's peace talks and diplomatic teams and whatnot and Zhao Yunlan is very bored. He might want to cuddle Heipaoshi.

SW stalker, <1k, weilan,

Shen Wei somehow stumbles into Zhao Yunlan's existence years before he did in canon. And then starts stalkins Zhao Yunlan, of course Zhao Yunlan catches onto something at some point.

ZYL memory loss, <1k, weilan

Instead of time travel Zhao Yunlan is immortal and has amnesia. There are some issues here with some of the details, but lots of handwaving will make it work.

I just had a dream, <1k, weilan

Literally a dream I had where Shen Wei is some kind of god that happens to rescue Zhao Yunlan for some reason. And then keeps rescuing him. And Zhao Yunlan figures out that Shen Wei will show up if he's in danger so then he starts deliberately putting himself in danger. Shen Wei is not happy about it, but of course still keeps saving him.

Mass Effect xover?, <1k, weilan(zun?)

The Hallows throw the three of them off somewhere else somewhere around the show ending, because they somehow know the reapers are coming and someone needs to do something. Set somewhere around ME2.

amnesia au, <1k, weilan

Shen Wei doesn't remember being the Black Cloaked Envoy. He meets Zhao Yunlan earlier than canon, they get married, everyone's happy. The SID is pretty busy with no BCE around. And then something happens and Shen Wei starts remembering, slowly in bits and pieces that don't make any sense (alright, I admit I might have rewatched the Long Kiss Goodnight).

monster!ZYL... prequel? <1k, no weilan because it's before they meet

Musings on little monster Zhao Yunlan's life before he meets Shen Wei in a night club.

android au, <1k, weilan

Zhao Yunlan used to be Kunlun during a war or something, got deactivated, but somehow Shen Wei managed to save him, but he got sent off somewhere to be reprogrammed/memory wiped instead and Shen Wei has been trying to find him ever since.

AC crossover, <1k, weilan

Post-death Desmond meets Shen Wei and Zhao Yunlan post-death. And then once Shen Wei and Zhao Yunlan drag themselves back to the living (because post-canon fix-it of course) they take Desmond with them.

soulmate au writing, <1k, weilan

Soulmates can write on their own skin and it appears on the other one. Zhao Yunlan and Shen Wei are soulmates separated by time, but they can still write to each other (because of the Hallows somehow).

another soulmate thing, <1k, weilan(zun?)

Soulmate bonding between Dixingren and Haixingren always skews in favour of Dixingren because something about dark energy making the bond and it ends up with the Haixingren sort of subservient. It is somewhat public knowledge that Zhao Yunlan has the Black Cloaked Envoy's mark. He's sixteen when they bond and he… has expectations. Things turn out quite different.

serum time travel, <1k, weilan

The serum at the end of the show makes Zhao Yunlan travel in time, but he can't control it. Just jumping from one moment to another, never there long enough to do much. Eventually, should somehow end up in a fix-it.

wish, <1k, weilan

Someone makes a wish to change one thing and the world is suddenly entirely different. Things go very bad. But possibly a somewhat hopeful ending anyway.

android sci fi au, <1k, weilan

Really just an excuse to write a scene with Zhao Yunlan flirting with android!Shen Wei and some outsider being horrified/disapproving. Because androids, you know.

Shen Xi and Shen Wei, <1k, weilan

AU where Shen Wei and Shen Xi learn to know each other because the treaty says that her son and the Black Cloaked Envoy will be married and Shen Xi wants to meet this man. Zhao Xinci will just have to indulge her.

Parallel, <1k, weilan

Somehow post canon (fix-it) Zhao Yunlan ends up seeing a parallel timeline in glimpses. His mom is still alive there. Somehow the two timelines seem to be converging and Zhao Yunlan doesn't know which one he wants to be real, because he's never seen Shen Wei in those moments when he sees the other world.

this nice AU, <1k, weilan(zun?)

More or less canon setting, except nothing bad is going on and everyone is doing well and Shen Wei and Ye Zun get along just fine. And Ye Zun decides to pretend to be Shen Wei and go flirt with Zhao Yunlan because he wants to know more about this human that Shen Wei has been hung up on for ten thousand years.

amnesia, <1k, lanzun, weilan

Zhao Yunlan loses his memory when he's in Dixing to free Shen Wei from the pillar. And then Ye Zun finds him, and well, takes advantage.

time travel fix it - ye zun, <1k

post-canon Ye Zun ends up travelling back in time to fix thing, but it means he initially ends up back in the pillar.

Dance, dance, <1k, weilan

Alright this is novel verse and entirely ridiculous. There are videos somewhere on the internet about the 'dance' stoats do to confuse prey (or something, it's weird) and what if that's what Little Ghost King did when hunting?

so what happened in YOHE, <1k, weilanzun

Zhao Yunlan manages some last minute rescuing of Ye Zun while back in time and things go differently.

sequel - he had a name, <1k, weilanzun

Sequel to https://archiveofourown.org/works/26892040/chapters/65617987. Zhao Yunlan is in Dixing and they try to work things out.

cohabitation, <1k, weilanzun in some form

Ye Zun is stuck in the pillar and his body is gone, and he can't just make a new one. Wanting to help Ye Zun, and make up with him, Shen Wei offers to share his own body with Ye Zun.

surviving, <1k, weilan

Both Zhao Yunlan and Shen Wei somehow live through the show end, but Shen Wei doesn't survive it well.

chronic pain, <1k, weilan

Post-canon fix-it, but Shen Wei is left with chronic pain and needs to learn to live with that.

arranged marriage, <1k, weilan

The Black Cloaked Envoy and Kunlun got married back in the day, and now with the anniversary of the Treaty signing coming up, they need to do a whole Black Cloaked Envoy getting married to a Haixingren thing again.

blind? <1k, weilan

A lot of Dixingren are born blind, Shen Wei happens to be one of them. Because of the whole living in darkness thing, which doesn't make as much sense for Shen Wei, but I'm going with that anyway.

tiny dragon, <1k, weilan, damian

One tiny dragon ficlet in the series that I started and haven't finished.

sequel? yohe, <1k, weilan

Another instalment in the time travel fix-it series (https://archiveofourown.org/series/2182137). This one deals with the YOHE issue.

sequel seeing shadows, <1k, weilan

(https://archiveofourown.org/works/42466083/chapters/106652535) Zhao Yunlan wakes up with amnesia, so the monster boyfriend is a bit surprising.

wants, <1k, weilan

Zhao Yunlan tries to get Shen Wei to express his wants, but Shen Wei doesn't actually know what they are

Hell, <1k, weilan

Masturbating creates a portal to hell. Shen Wei is a demon…

Shen Xi and Shen Wei, <1k, gen

The treaty says that Shen Xi's son and the Black Cloaked Envoy will be married and Shen Xi is going to meet this man no matter what.

1k-5k words

but winter, ~4k, weilan

Literally just "what if Guardian, but it's winter?" Things did start deviating from canon pretty fast though, so who knows where it's going.

Fringe AU, ~1k, weilan

Tries to fit the whole concept of Fringe (two universes, if they eventually smash together badness follows) with Guardian somehow. The Hallows have something to do with crossing universes, there's only one Zhao Yunlan and somehow he falls for the Shen Wei in both universes.

Somekind of eldritch AU? ~1k, weilan

Shen Wei is some kind of eldritch thing faking humanity for some reason, he went to jail a decade or so ago for a series of murders (actually committed by Ye Zun probably) and now Zhao Yunlan is investigating murders that are exactly like those ones…

AC fusion thing, ~1k, weilan

Assassin's Creed fusion with Zhao Yunlan stuck in the animus. He meets Shen Wei in his memories and then I just handwave everything AC tells us about how the animus works so I can make this weilan anyway. By Hallows magic somehow.

undercover cop au, ~1.3k, weilan

Zhao Yunlan is an undercover cop, Shen Wei is a lawyer for a criminal organisation. They end up fake dating because Shen Wei finds out about Zhao Yunlan and wants to help him for reasons he's not telling Zhao Yunlan.

dragon au, ~3.8k, weilan

Zhao Yunlan accidentally wakes up a sleeping dragon when he's a kid. And then at some point when he's all grown up he meets Shen Wei.

So like, SW and HPS different people, ~1.3k, okay probably some weird ot4

There's three brothers instead of two. Shen Wei is the normal brother. I'm pretty sure Zhao Yunlan falls for everyone.

DA fusion thing, ~1.1k, weilanzun

Dragon Age Inquisition-ish setting plot wise. Shen Wei and Ye Zun share a body (like an Anders-Justice type situation). I just wanted something where if they're in the Fade Shen Wei is suddenly Ye Zun instead. There's some plot and backstory, and trying to mash Hallows and other Guardian things into this setting. But the Shen Wei and Ye Zun situation is the most important thing.

da xover, ~1.4k, weilan

Portal accident somehow takes post-canon Shen Wei and Zhao Yunlan physically into the Fade. And then… they get involved in the plot of DA:Inquisition.

Monsters in the jungle, ~2.8k, weilan

AU, explorer!ZYL gets dumped into the jungle to die, and gets found by Shen Wei, who is half snake apparently.

yohe sex injury, ~1k, weilan

Their first time having sex turns out a bit… much and Zhao Yunlan gets slightly injured. It's not really the first time that's happened (from Zhao Yunlan's perspective) and he doesn't think it's a big deal, Shen Wei can heal him and no harm done. Except Shen Wei hasn't learned healing yet, and he's a lot more horrified at hurting Kunlun.

fake dating, ~1.1k, weilan

Everyone keeps assuming Zhao Yunlan and Da Qing are dating, for some reason, Zhao Yunlan can't be bothered to correct them. When he meets a very attractive Professor Shen, Zhao Yunlan is suddenly worried that he'll think that too.

Untitled document, ~1k, weilan

AU, this is a bit confusing because I forgot the specifics of what this is about (learn to make notes, self). It starts out with Shen Wei and Ye Zun being separated because Shen Wei gets banished from Dixing because he disagrees with certain official policy. Haixingren are the result of Dixingren doing some kind of experimenting to make people better suited to life on the surface. Except things get out of hand and there's a rebellion and war. After he gets exiled to Haixing, Shen Wei meets Kunlun.

sw/zyl/hps, ~1.8k, weilan (I guess, what else would I call it?)

Shen Wei, despite seeming all kinds of suspicious and being in the wrong place at the wrong time actually is entirely normal human man. The Black Cloaked Envoy is the Black Cloaked Envoy (I might need to figure out if he still looks just like Shen Wei). Somehow, Zhao Yunlan manages to start a relationship with both.

marriage proposal celbrity au, ~2.6k, weilan

AU based on the trailer of some movie. Zhao yunlan is a celebrity of some kind, Shen Wei is University Professor that ends up entirely accidentally proposing to him during some public event (it was Cheng Xinyan's sign, he was just holding onto it, and it was a joke anyway) and Zhao Yunlan accepts for reasons, in public.

knitting, ~1.6k, background weilan probably

Post-canon fix-it and Ye Zun is supposed to find a nice calming hobby to keep himself occupied. Knitting is it. He forces gifts on people.

kidnapping, ~1.3k, weilan

After meeting Zhao Yunlan for the first time, Shen Wei gets his file, learns some things about Zhao Yunlan and decides the most sensible thing to do to keep him safe is to kidnap him.

bear, ~2.7k, weilan

At some point is the past Shen Wei somehow got stuck as a bear (a curse or something, a Dixing power?). Zhao Yunlan meets a bear, and is rightfully terrified. He doesn't know the bear is anything but a bear.

dragons. for fucks sake. I cry, ~2.7k, weilan

Shen Wei is a dragon and when he meets Zhao Yunlan for the first time in modern times he more or less drags Zhao Yunlan to watch some baby dragons hatch. Look, Kunlun had told him he'd be there for it, so Shen Wei just goes with it. He just forgets to actually tell Zhao Yunlan that they're actually also Zhao Yunlan's babies. Or, Zhao Yunlan acquires an instant dragon family.

mermaid love triangle in the forest, ~1.2k, weilanzun

Very random fantasy AU. Zhao Yunlan is some kind of errant hero, and there's monsters in the forest. Well, mermaids. In a forest. Thank you random prompt.

enemies to lovers, ~3k, weilan

An AU where the Dixing-Haixing relations are worse. Well, Zhao Yunlan assumes they're enemies, Shen Wei (who hasn't been able to move to Haixing in this AU) has never actually met the Chief of the SID and has no specific feelings about him, but this one seems… better from what he's heard. So, when Shen Wei sneaks his brother out of the pillar, he needs to take him somewhere, and the Chief of the SID seems like a very bad choice, but it's possibly also literally the only Haixingren Shen Wei knows about. If he won't help, Shen Wei will just make him help. He really just needs somewhere to hide for a while.

what do you mean by expected? ~2.6k, weilan

Some mpreg happens due to the whole Sundial healing thing.

space farming, ~2.6k, weilanzun

Scifi AU, Zhao Yunlan crashlands on what seems like an empty planet and then finds the twins just sitting there, leaning against each other and not moving in the middle of a field of oats.

Shen Wei is not a disney princess, ~3.3k, weilan

Shen Wei woke up from the nap and decided to go live alone in a cottage in the woods for reasons. There are animal friends.

daemon au, ~3.6k, weilan

Basically canon but with some daemon wordlbuilding.

another au, ~3k, weilan

Relatively close to show canon, but there's no Black Cloaked Envoy. The SID occasionally gets messages from Dixing telling them about some escapee. One day the rogue Dixingren they get information about is Shen Wei.

teaching cat, ~4.2k, weilan

Post-canon Shen Wei and Zhao Yunlan (and Ye Zun) go on vacation. But Shen Wei has to do some remote teaching for a few days (Zhao Yunlan promises to set it up). During everything, Shen Wei gets turned into a cat and insists on teaching anyway, as long as the students don't see him, it'll be fine or something, and Ye Zun steals a child (it's not stealing if the parents don't want her anyway, Ye Zun insists).

wolf cubs, ~1.8k, weilan(zun?)

Zhao Yunlan and Da Qing go hiking and run into a couple of wolf cubs. Well, the wolf cub finds them and takes them to its injured sibling, really. Somehow, Shen Wei got Ye Zun out of the pillar but things went a bit wrong and now they're in Haixing and stuck as tiny wolves.

hostile alien race? ~1.9k, weilan

Dixing is some semi-evil alien empire and Shen Wei's spaceship ends up boarding Haixing's first exploratory spaceship, captained by Zhao Yunlan.

chatfic, ~2.3k, weilan

AU where Dixing and Haixing are at war. Shen Wei gets captured, and tortured by Zhao Yunlan who doesn't know who he is yet, because time travel.

cyberpunk(ish) au, ~1.9k, weilan

Roughly canon adjacent, but Dixingren come with various cybernetic enhancements.

broken time, ~1.8k, weilanzun

At some point post-canon while Zhao Yunlan is hanging around not being alive, he somehow manages to time travel back to YOHE, and then decides fuck timelines and changes things. And the future, his own time, turns out very different.

neigbours, ~1k, weilan

Monster AU, Zhao Yunlan gets a new neighbour, and he seems a bit… off.

shen wei/zhao yunlan/ye zun???? ~1.4k, weilanzun

Post-canon. An ace Ye Zun tries to somehow fit into Shen Wei and Zhao Yunlan's life, while being in turns jealous and angry at the other two.

the world never touched me, ~1.1k, weilan

An AU where Shen Wei is the murderer the SID is after.

assassin!au, I guess, ~4.4k, weilan

Assassin!Shen Wei gets hired to take out cop!Zhao Yunlan.

dark fic? ~1.2k, weilan

Basically just Shen Wei a little less worried about doing the right thing.

hps dream thing, ~4.4k, weilan

Mostly canon-ish, but something where Shen Wei looks more alien/inhuman.

haunted house sequel, ~3.8k, background weilan, maybe Wang Zheng/Sang Zan

Wang Zheng gets murdered and then she's busy trying to solve her murder and trying to make the only colleague who might have any idea she's still around actually pay enough attention to actually notice her.

guo changcheng, ~3.3k, Guo Changcheng/Chu Nianzhi(/Chu Shuzhi)

A sidestory to Modern Times (https://archiveofourown.org/works/39748716). Guo Changcheng somehow is assigned as an aid to Haixing's ambassador to Dixing.

hive of two, ~2.2k, weilanzun

Scifi AU, Zhao Yunlan goes to check up on some reported anomaly that turns out to be a spaceship. The twins have at some point separated from a larger hive mind (something between Star Trek's Borg, and Marvel's Phalanx but with less malicious intent and more just… trying to learn the universe by assimilating it or something), and they're injured and not dealing all that well with being alone. Zhao Yunlan gets added to mini hive mind.

ye zun? ~1.2k, weilan

Another instalment in the time travel fix-it series (https://archiveofourown.org/series/2182137). Zhao Yunlan dealing with Ye Zun not being who he remembers from the other timeline.

Sequel - in the shadows, ~2k, weilan

Eventually Ye Zun/Zhao Xinci, navigating child care and trying to figure out family relationships when most of the family are eldritch beings and Zhao Yunlan is very human.

wind is cold, ~4.8k, weilan

Trying to figure out canon with a much darker Shen Wei.

the future, ~1.4k, weilan

Another part of teenage!Zhao Yunlan meets Shen Wei series (https://archiveofourown.org/series/1810891). Just weilan being weilan really, and maybe trying to save Dixing.

ot3 kissing, ~2.2k, weilanzun

Zhao Yunlan walks in on Ye Zun kissing Shen Wei (it's never happened before) and expects some kind of explanation

possession ZYL-KL, ~1k, Shen Wei/Zhao Yunlan+Kunlun(?)

Zhao Yunlan gets possessed by Kunlun

grooming, ~1.8k, weilan

The hair kind of grooming in YOHE

AC reincarnation ~2.5k, weilan

Assasin's Creed crossover. Zhao Yunlan gets reincarnated as Desmond. And then ends up seeing Shen Wei somewhere in those ancestral memories while he's in the Animus.

same, ~1.5k, weilanzun(?)

Shen Wei and Ye Zun are the same person, sort of. Except Ye Zun was the original personality that somehow (trauma and dark energy) got replaced by Shen Wei. Shen Wei doesn't know this and thinks all his memories of his didi are real. And then Ye Zun comes back

SW and HPS different, ~3.6k, weilan (except with two Shen Weis)

The Hallows do something screwy while Shen Wei is napping and now he's two individual people: Professor Shen and Heipaoshi.

imperial au, ~1.2k, weilan

Zhao Yunlan is a crown prince. He's forced to marry Shen Wei, the prince of another rival nation

yet another soulmate au, ~1.2k, weilan

Soulmate marks that grow when something significant happens in their lives. Idk, baby Zhao Yunlan is born with a lot of soulmark then?

FFVII xover, ~4.7k, weilan (no idea what I'm doing with Ye Zun though)

Post-canon Guardian Shen Wei, Zhao Yunlan and Ye Zun end up in pre-canon FFVII (pre-canon for the game that is). Apparently they meet Angeal at some point.

naruto xover, ~3.1k, I think I might seriously have been considering Hatake Sakumo/Ye Zun so who even knows

Okay, this is hilariously both a time travel fix-it for naruto (Kakashi goes back in time) and a crossover where Ye Zun just happens to run into Kakashi. It doesn't make sense, but whatever.

another ac crossover I guess, ~1.5k, weilan (other than that I have no idea at this point)

Desmond meets Shen Wei, Zhao Yunlan and Ye Zun in the Grey.

Zhu Hong time travel, ~3.9k, weilan

Zhu Hong gets to do the time travel fix-it

voyager vorik/ye zun, ~1.8k, Vorik/Ye Zun (but probably very one sided)

They happen to be on Haixing when Vorik has his Pon Farr and he proposes to Ye Zun isntead

voices, ~2.1k, weilan

Soulmate!AU, kid!Zhao Yunlan hears Shen Wei's voice in his head, except it speaks in a language he doesn't understand.

goth!ZYL :D, ~1.8k, weilan

Sequel to At First Glance (https://archiveofourown.org/works/55003546)

AI, ~1.4k, weilan

This is literally a fever dream. Shen Wei is an AI in charge of Zhao Yunlan's life. And then there's… some kind of android rebellion going on.

tiny soulmate, ~2.6k, weilan

Zhao Yunlan has had Xiao Wei (literally, he's tiny) with him his whole life. No one else can see him, and Zhao Yunlan doesn't know where he came from.

YZ/DQ, ~1.4k, Ye Zun/Da Qing, weilan

Da Qing is lying in the sun when suddenly a very young time travelling Ye Zun appears out of nowhere.

somnophilia, ~1.7k, weilan

Supernatural AU of some kind. Zhao Yunlan accidentally summons Shen Wei, doesn't realise it and then Shen Wei just hangs around without Zhao Yunlan ever realising he's there and kind of… worries about Zhao Yunlan. And maybe takes advantage while Zhao Yunlan is sleeping.

Planet drop, ~3.1k, weilan

Apparently this is the idea: Random idea. Something happened, Haixing evacuated. And then a lot of years later ZYL and a bunch of others go down to… investigate. Make that work somehow.

Weilan Jurassic park, ~2k, weilan

Weilan end up on Isla Sorna (portal accident or something) around Jurassic Park 2, with that kid Eric

5k-10k words

soulmate au, 8.9k, weilan(zun?)

A soulmate AU that is relatively close to canon, but things aren't going so badly, Ye Zun is un-pillared and living with Shen Wei when weilan meet. Ye Zun doesn't have a soulmark and at some point when they were kids Shen Wei promised that Ye Zun would of course share his soulmate. Ye Zun intends to keep Shen Wei to that promise. (I'm not entirely sure what kind of relationship Ye Zun and Zhao Yunlan will have yet, though.)

Sword!YZ, ~4.6, weilanzun

Ye Zun is somehow actually Shen Wei's sword/glaive turned sentient and, you know, human shaped. Shen Wei still sees him as his brother though. Also no one is stuck in a pillar. Having Ye Zun around makes the first meeting with Zhao Yunlan happen differently.

baby animals, ~5.5k, weilan

The Black Cloaked Envoy keeps showing up with baby animals all over him, like that's normal. Zhao Yunlan is charmed, everyone else is confused or vaguely horrified. No one ever says anything about it.

sequel life's a little weird, ~7.1k, weilan

The next part in this AU: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2649130. Zhao Yunlan gets offered the job as Chief of SID.

other soulmate AU, ~6.6k, weilan

Dixingren soulbonding is a bit more intense, requiring that they basically keep touching each other for however long (days, weeks, it depends) until the bond is stable. So, Zhao Yunlan's first meeting with the Black Cloaked Envoy goes in a very surprising direction.

more au, ~9.7k, weilan

Canon adjacent AU, Shen Wei is in prison in Haixing, he stays there for reasons that are his own, then suddenly escapes. He goes after among other people Zhao Xinci (because he was involved in whatever happened in the past). The team sent to capture him includes Zhao Yunlan, who's still a relatively young cop. There's a stand off sort of thing where Shen Wei holds Zhao Xinci hostage, and Zhao Yunlan suddenly offers himself up instead.

sequel k15 - it's complicated, ~6k, weilan

Shen Wei tries to navigate being an accidental sugar daddy to teen prostitute Zhao Yunlan (https://archiveofourown.org/works/26986951)

vampire, ~7.6k, weilan

Mostly casefic and Shen Wei just happens to be a vampire

Gifts, ~8.2k, weilan

Vaguely supernatural AU where Shen Wei has been stalking Zhao Yunlan for a while and leaves him weaponry (mostly knives) as gifts for reasons.

Star Wars xover, ~8.7k, weilan

Post canon everyone is magically alive and some Mandalorians happen to make a quick stop on Haixing and Zhao Yunlan thinks it's a good idea if he and Shen Wei take Ye Zun and leave with them because apparently no one is that happy with Ye Zun being around. Oh, Da Qing goes with them too.

monster, ~8.5k, weilan

Some kind of AU where apparently Heipaoshi and the Guardian traditionally work together by Heipaoshi possessing the Guardian

ZYL time travel, ~5.3k, weilan

Post canon (I think) Zhao Yunlan time travels and finds himself an outsider to that scene where kid!Zhao Yunlan lost his dog. He decides to interfere

memory, ~8.1k, weilan

Shen Wei has a power (can't turn it off) that makes people forget about him once they haven't seen him for a day or something. It makes relationships hard. Zhao Yunlan makes notes, he's not going to be stopped by some memory issues.

acquiring ZYL, 8k, weilan

Zhao Yunlan was kidnapped at some point when he was younger and taken to Dixing and sold into some kind of sexual slavery. A lot later Shen Wei finds him and kills everyone and takes Zhao Yunlan with him. Except Zhao Yunlan now thinks Shen Wei is his new master.

lake dragon, ~6.9k, weilanzun(?)

Totally a dream I had. Zhao Yunlan wakes up in a strange place with temporary amnesia. He finds some weird town, and some weird people. And then there's a lake, with a dragon, that people warn him not to go close to. There's a portal at the bottom of the lake somewhere.

tiniest dragon sequel, ~7.4k, weilan

Sequel to Too Small (https://archiveofourown.org/works/46538785/chapters/117189478). Shen Wei keeps growing.

space pirate AU, ~6.1k, weilan

Shen Wei is a space pirate (really, some kind of freedom fighter) and Zhao Yunlan is stuck policing some backwater planet that Shen Wei is supposed to meet someone on. It's a trap, there's fighting, Zhao Yunlan ends up in the middle. Shen Wei kidnaps him, as you do.

he-man x-over, ~8.6k, weilan

Crossover with the newish netflix he-man. Shen Wei, Zhao Yunlan and Ye Zun are hanging around in the void post-canon and then Eldress ends up there and she ends up wishing them all back to Eternia with the wishstone.

>10k words

ot3 arranged marriage AU, ~12.3k, weilanzun

It's the old the Treaty says they need to get married thing, but instead of just marrying the Black Cloaked Envoy, Zhao Yunlan needs to marry both of the twins.

alone, ~26.1k, weilan, Chu Shuzhi/Shen Wei, Shen Wei/OCs, Zhao Yunlan/Da Qing

Shen Wei wakes up in Haixing after his long nap and the portal to Dixing is closed. He has to learn all about modern Haixing on his own, and somehow through some odd developments there's prostitution (hey, he needs money) and then he slowly and accidentally takes over the whole business, and starts studying in uni. Eventually, he meets Zhao Yunlan.

in this thing together, ~33.5k, weilan (optionally weilanzun)

A choose your own story that's gotten very out of hand and has too many storylines. Shen Wei holds Ye Zun's hand in that last scene in YOHE and lets go or doesn't let go, Zhao Yunlan manages to intervene or he doesn't… and then the Hallows have opinions too.

weizun I suppose, ~14.1k, weizun

Third part of a genderbent series, mostly a prequel about the twins learning to get along and some twincest, https://archiveofourown.org/series/2613379

let's go back to yesterday, ~18k, weilan

A time travel/time loop story that fixes nothing, just makes things differently sad.

tradition, ~22.2k, weilan

A kind of collar AU, where that's a Dixing tradition or something. Not sure I'm entirely happy with how close to slave!AU this one got, so I don't know if I should rework things or not.

voyager xover, ~11.2k, weilanzun

Star Trek Voyager that is. They find dilithium or something on Haixing, and then accidentally end up kidnapping everyone during that whole confrontation with Ye Zun at the end, and there's a transporter accident… there's a lot going on here.

marriage, ~14k, weilan

A younger Zhao Yunlan digs Shen Wei out of the ground and accidentally proposes marriage. Shen Wei of course thinks it's the best idea, even once he finds out Zhao Yunlan has no idea who he is.

Weilan derivatives

These are mostly not getting summaries, because the title is the pairing and that basically is the summary. Just throw the characters together and see what happens.

<1k words

Luo Qingeng/Han Chen, <1k (cult leader!LQG, undercover cop!HC)

Jiang Yang/Mao Hou, <1k

Luo Fusheng/Jiang Yang, <1k (JY wakes up and there's a dead body, LFS helps)

Yang Xiuxian/Xun Xu, <1k (YXX time travels)

Jiang Yang/Xun Xu, <1k (JY time travels)

Jiang Yang/??????, <1k (more like JY/everyone)

sequel - unexpected turns, <1k (Jiang Yang/Luo Fusheng)

Luo Fusheng/Jiang Yang?, <1k

Jiang Yang/Han Chen the AU fusion version, <1k

Jiang Yang/?, <1k

1k-5k words

Luo Fusheng/Jiang Yang Star Wars AU, ~4.1k

Meng Shaohui/?, ~1.1k (I'm thinking either Bai Zhu or Jiang Yang, so far it's just MSH breaking up from gf)

Mao Hou/Lin Dayu, ~2.1k

Chen Yiming/Lin Dayu, ~2k

Cheng Musheng/Jiang Yang, ~2.5k

Luo Qingeng/Chen Yiming, ~2.9k

Yang Xiuxian/Luo Fusheng, ~1k (older LFS amused at getting hit on)

Han Chen/Mao Hou, ~3.3k

Jiang Yang/Han Chen (the worst idea), ~1.7k (HC time travels a few years back)

Xun Xu/Luo Fusheng, ~3.6k (this is catboy!LFS btw)

Luo Fusheng/Chang Dong/Ye Liuxi (Parallel World (folder)), ~4.5k

Ye Liuxi/Chang Dong/Hua Wuxie (?), ~1.4k

Chang Dong/Ye Liuxi/Jiang Zhan (also not derivative obviously), ~4k

Chang Dong/Gongzi Jing sequel, ~3k

Yang Xiuxian/Gongzi Jing, ~3.2k

5k-10k words

Chen Yiming/Han Chen, ~8.6k (HC saves a pocket sized CYM)

Luo Qingeng/Jiang Yang/Luo Fusheng, ~6.4k

Clown/Yang Xiuxian, ~5.8k

Mao Hou/Lin Dayu, ~5.1k

Jiang Yang/Han Chen/Luo Fusheng (android thing), ~6.6k (LFS is the android)

#since it's wip wednesday and all #do please ask about them #my wips #fanfic #writing #sorry for the shitty formatting #there's a 160 wips #and i'm tired

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