#sorry im rambling i have thoughts

[catguangcorner]

body for rent (at the end of the line)

(or a VeiFei ficlet in which Xia Fei agrees, to something. it's all subtext and suggestion, really — read into it however you like)

The underground roars as the train cuts through a long tunnel and engulfs the train carriage in momentary darkness — Vein's stare like a laser piercing Xia Fei's skull, intruding, unyielding; he says something Xia Fei doesn't catch, something swallowed by the screech of the train.

His ears pop from the air pressure. Vein's hand settles on Xia Fei's knee, like it has always belonged there. Still, the carriage shrouded in little light, still, the words caught in his throat — he swallows them with an easy smile. Vein's cool cologne — eucalyptus? — dizzying him as he leans in close, fingers pressing and digging into his jeans. Xia Fei tips his head closer, until Vein's lips ghost the shell of his ear, breath warm, words low:

"I said, just how willing are you, sweetheart?" his voice drips with sweet venom.

"Well... I'll do exactly as you like, Vein." 

At that, he grins, wide enough that the yellow flickering lights catching his too sharp canines. The glint in his eye is animal, Xia Fei knows. But he can't stand to look away. Under Vein's watchful, hungry gaze, he might just shine. Might be seen. 

"A-Xiao was right — you are the perfect little doll."

Out of the dark now, bouts of daylight fall in and out the near empty carriage. They're coming towards the end of the line.

Xia Fei does know the risk, but he leans in anyway, eager for the reward.

[just-null]

Do you ever do requests? If so, do you ever plan on drawing some Yandere with the Hantengu clones? :D hope you have a good day/night!!!

Mentioning an unfamiliar name

yes!! I love yanderes.. and these guys.. these guys are such good material...... nods nods..

I'm not sure about requests..I assume you mean drawing requests? I suppose if it REALLY catches my interest enough, I'd do it, but it'd probably just be line art/sketches.

[bubblingsteam]

[lucabyte]

isat doodles in the form of a silly-serious-silly sandwich

[starry-bi-sky]

i need to get this out of my head before i continue clone^2 but danny being the first batkid. Like, standard procedure stuff: his parents and sister die, danny ends up with Vlad Masters. He drags him along to stereotypical galas and stuff; Danny is not having a good time.

He ends up going to one of the Wayne Galas being hosted ever since elusive Bruce Wayne has returned to Gotham. Vlad is crowing about having this opportunity as he's been wanting to sink his claws into the company for a long while now. Danny is too busy grieving to care what he wants.

And like most Galas, once Vlad is done showing him off to the other socialites and the like, he disappears. Off to a dark corner, or to one of the many balconies; doesn't matter. There he runs into said star of the show, Bruce who is still young, has been Batman for at least a year at this point, but still getting used to all these damn people and socializing. He's stepped off to hide for a few minutes before stepping back into the shark tank.

And he runs into a kid with circles under his eyes and a dull gleam in them. Familiar, like looking into a mirror.

Danny tries to excuse himself, he hasn't stopped crying since his parents died and it's been months. He rubs his eyes and stands up, and stumbles over a half-hearted apology to Mister Wayne. Some of Vlad's etiquette lessons kicking in.

Bruce is awkward, but he softens. "That's alright, lad," he says, pulling up some of that Brucie Wayne confidence, "I was just coming out here to get some fresh air."

There's a little pressing; Bruce asks who he's here with, Danny says, voice quiet and grief-stricken, that he's with his godfather Vlad Masters. Bruce asks him if he knows where he is, and Danny tells him he does. Bruce offers to leave, Danny tells him to do whatever he wants.

It ends with Bruce staying, standing off to the side with Danny in silence. Neither of them say a word, and Danny eventually leaves first in that same silence.

Bruce looks into Vlad Masters after everything is over, his interest piqued. He finds news about him taking in Danny Fenton: he looks into Danny Fenton. He finds news articles about his parents' deaths, their occupations, everything he can get his hands on.

At the next gala, he sees Danny again. And he looks the same as ever: quiet like a ghost, just as pale, and full of grief. Bruce sits in silence with him again for nearly ten minutes before he strikes a conversation.

"Do you like to do anything?"

Nothing. Just silence.

Bruce isn't quite sure what to do: comfort is not his forte, and Danny doesn't know him. He's smart enough to know that. So he starts talking about other things; anything he can think of that Brucie Wayne might say, that also wasn't inappropriate for a kid to hear.

Danny says nothing the entire time, and is again the first to leave.

Bruce watches from a distance as he intercts with Vlad Masters; how Vlad Masters interacts with him. He doesn't like what he sees: Vlad Masters keeps a hand on Danny's shoulder like one would hold onto the collar of a dog. He parades him around like a trophy he won.

And there are moments, when someone gets too close or when someone tries to shake Danny's hand, of deep possessiveness that flints over Vlad Masters' eyes. Like a dragon guarding a horde.

He plays the act of doting godfather well: but Bruce knows a liar when he sees one. Like recognizes like.

Danny is dull-eyed and blank faced the entire time; he looks miserable.

So Bruce tries to host more parties; if only so that he can talk to Danny alone. Vlad seems all too happy to attend, toting Danny along like a ribbon, and on the dot every hour, Danny slips away to somewhere to hide. Bruce appears twenty minutes later.

"I was looking into your godfather's company," he says one night, trying to think of more things to say. Some nights all they do is sit in silence. "Some of my shareholders were thinking of partnering up--"

"Don't."

He stops. Danny hardly says a word to him, he doesn't even look at him -- he's sitting on the ground, his head in his knees. Like he's trying to hide from the world. But he's looking, blue eyes piercing up at Bruce.

Bruce tilts his head, practiced puppy-like. "Pardon?"

"Don't." Danny says, strongly. "Don't make any deals with Vlad."

It's the most words Danny's spoken to him, and there's a look in his eyes like a candle finding its spark. Something hard. Bruce presses further, "And why is that?"

The spark flutters, and flushes out. Danny blinks like he's coming out of a trance, and slumps back into himself. "Just don't."

Bruce stares at him, thoughtful, before looking away. "Alright. I won't."

And they fall back into silence.

Danny, when he leaves, turns to look at Bruce, "I mean it." He says; soft like he's telling a secret, "Don't make any deals with him. Don't be alone with him. Don't work with him."

He's scampered away before Bruce can question him further.

(He never planned on working with Vlad Masters and his company; he's done his research. He's seen the misfortune. But nothing ever leads back to him. There's no evidence of anything. But Danny knows something.)

At their next meeting, Danny starts the conversation. It's new, and it's welcomed. He says, cutting through their five minute quiet, that he likes stars. And he doesn't like that he can't see them in Gotham.

Bruce hums in interest, and Danny continues talking. It's as if floodgates had been opened, and as Bruce takes a sip of his wine, it tastes like victory.

("Tucker told me once--") ("Tucker?") ("Oh-- uh, one of my best friends. He's a tech geek. We haven't talked in a while.")

(Danny shut down in his grief -- his friends are worried, but can't reach him. When he goes back to the manor with Vlad, he fishes out his phone and sends them a message.)

(They are ecstatic to hear from him.)

It all culminates until one day, when Danny is leaving to go back inside, that Bruce speaks up. "You know," He says, leaning against the railing. "The manor has many rooms; plenty of space for a guest."

The implication there, hidden between the lines. And Danny is smart, he looks at Bruce with a sharp glean in his eyes, and he nods. "Good to know."

The next time they see each other, Danny has something in his hands. "Can you hold onto something for me?" He asks.

When Bruce agrees, Danny places a pearl into his palm. or, at least, it's something that looks like a pearl. Because it's cold to the touch; sinking into Bruce's white silk gloves with ease and shimmering like an opal. It moves a little as it settles into his hand, and the moves like its full of liquid.

Bruce has never seen anything like it before, but he does know this; it's not human. "What is it?" He asks, and Danny looks uncomfortable.

"I can't tell you that." He says, shifting on his foot like he's scared of someone seeing it. "But please be careful with it. Treat it like it's extremely fragile."

When Bruce gets home, he puts it in an empty ring box and hides the box in the cave. He tries researching into what it is. he can't find anything concrete.

Everything comes to a head one day when Danny appears at the manor's doorstep one evening, soaking wet in the rain, and bleeding from the side.

[boycaca]

I think the reason people believe chuuya would be the more open and affectionate in soukoku (as like. A romantic relationship) is because they believe him to be the mentally stable one and i think the reason people seem to believe he’s one of the few “mentally stable” characters in bsd is because he does not let himself be seen as vulnerable, and the few times we do see him go through something genuinely horrible and having a moment of vulnerability he does not really have the time to truly process it and ends up “moving on” pretty quickly (for example when he was at the flags’ funeral and adam interrupted him, or how when the sheep betrayed him dazai was immediately at his side trying to convince him to join the pm). And even if he does process it and thinks “man that was pretty fucked up wasnt it” it is never shown on screen so i feel like a lot of viewers end up seeing it as him not being bothered by these events and just a pretty chill dude that doesnt wallow in grief or self pity. But i think him never wallowing in grief or self pity is kind of a problem because in the end all he is doing is suppressing all that trauma and not really trying to acknowledge it, but at the same time when he does he ends up pinning the blame on himself (how the sheeps betrayal was his fault, the flags dying because of him). I feel like this impacts how affectionate he is too because he has built up so many walls that at the point when the flags make a party to celebrate the one year anniversary of him joining the pm he gets suspicious, then surprised and then flustered and tries acting like he doesnt care about it. All this is to say that i think him believing he cant show weakness and has to maintain the facade of being “the strongest” makes him seem like some regular degular guy (if he’s not fighting dragons) ends up him getting viewed as some mentally stable, communicative guy with maaaybe just a bit of anger issues when in reality he got so embarrassed by dazai’s corny speech in mersault that he shot him in the head with a gun

[crowsgrudge]

fionna's world being represented by a dandelion makes so much sense ... they're weeds. yet people make wishes through them, changing their whole meaning from something meant to be destroyed to something hopeful.

dandelions are also resilient and it makes sense that something associated with them would. you know. perservere despite the destruction caused by the scarab.

but ultimately i think what REALLY made me tear up over this is that dandelions are really boring plants. when you're a kid you blow on them and make your wish but they're not eyecatching or anything but still, fionna's final wish was for her old world to still exist as it was when she left it (> plain and simple. boring even).

like the moment she realized she would lose her friends, and that her friends might forget each other if the world got its magic back, she immediately decided she didn't want it and I think that ties back to the dandelion metaphor so well... like, do you really need magic to be real to find it everywhere? or can you turn something boring into something magical?

[tojisun]

bear with me but uhm

we can’t be friends by ariana grande is so. like. best friend reader x hockey player/best friend! gaz during their collegiate years

just the overflowing pining and the “he can’t possibly like me…” moments with your friends while you all stay up late at night, trying to study for your midterms.

and your friends tell you—because they know—that no, you’re totally wrong because kyle absolutely can—because he does—like you. but your doubts continue to bloat, and how could they not build when kyle’s being scouted for the damn junior leagues, and he’s soaring heights you can’t reach because you’re stuck here, left behind, and you just.

you love him so much.

he is everything good in your life. everything that is beautiful.

he fills you up with so much joy and love, and he is so gentle and careful and tender, but also so full of silliness and boyish charm as he pranks you and fucks with your brother, tugging you two out of your slumps—for separate reasons—and is so patient when your minds continue to fight back.

kyle tucks himself beside you when it’s off-seasons, helping you with the courses that you find the hardest. he is so warm beside you on those days, and you burn from within because the words you want to say tickle the back of your throat, building, almost spilling, until—

“i got drafted for the juniors!” he yells, laughing, hoisting you up in his arms, deaf to your shrieks.

and.

and time pauses, it stills, because kyle is taking off, leaving you.

“holy shit,” you say, giddy despite the cold dread of your loneliness creeping down from the base of your neck to the plane of your spine. “holy shit, kyle, that’s so- i’m so-”

his eyes are bright, warm, full of unbridled joy, and his cheeks are round in his smile.

you breathe in, forcing the dread out of your chest because— “i’m so proud of you, kyle,” you say, and you mean it.

despite the fear and the anxiety of being separated from him, you truly are so, so proud of him.

he hugs you close and you pretend that the tremors overtaking your body is because of your excitement.

[artandbrimstone]

First things first 

!!!! Riptide 115 spoilers !!!!!

And if im wrong about anything i am sorry :( also this might be nothing but i need to say this somewhere

Chip and his lack of control over his own fate is so interesting to me. The guy who tells gillion tidestrider “I didn’t believe in destiny before i met you” is somehow, out of the three of them, the one who is seemingly following a predetermined path set out for him. 

Gillion, whilst being the chosen one, struggles with this identity and was exiled, which may be in his destiny but was clearly not intended by the elders. 

Jay has her prophecy (type thing I know its not exactly a prophecy) but it has no clear path for her specifically to follow.

Chip, however, was destined to end up back at the hole in the sea, but barely remembers actually being there in the first place, and yet when he does return to the black sea, there is a message from Rose from a decade prior knowing not only that he would return, but that he would be there looking for them after their disappearance. (i dont have the brainpower to go into how insane that message makes me so just know i think about it at least once a day). Even chips search for arlin, which was originally his own, was used against him and taken advantage of by Niklaus (with whatever the fuck he is planning im not smart enough to figure that out im just insane) making what was originally a goal into an “incessant urge to not only find the other members but also do what you [chip] were told and return to the hole in the sea”.

Not only that, there is also the compass, which is further twisting and intensifying chips desire to find arlin and return to the hole in the sea (niklaus also told chip to stop using the compass but yknow) so not even his desires, his main motivations that have led him to where he is now, arent truly his own. ( interestingly despite rose knowing he would go back to the black sea, still urges him to leave behind the legacy of the black rose pirates and do something greater) 

Even his death he had no part in, no crucial mistake, nothing he could have done differently to avoid it, he was simply chosen and made an example of for the sake of making a point of how fucked they were against captain widow, yet again a pawn in something he had no control over.

And then, when they do finally reach the hole in the sea, chip is led by the compass (THE FUCKIGN COMPASSSSS) and (im getting into insane territory here) has strange parallels to captain rose. He is separated from his crew (namely the only other black rose pirate, drey), made a deal with niklaus regarding the hole in the sea has the hole in his chest (idc if its not there in canon its there to me) however what is he met with? “Welcome home”. Now what does that mean? I dont fuckign know but it makes me very insane and this is long enough already so i hope you enjoyed my incoherent chip just roll with it ramble :D

[cyanorth]

me if shoving my interests together was a job (id be rich)

anyway malevoff is real

[crocuta1]

Marie's Spinosaurus 💔💔💔💔

I haven't decided if I like the name Calzone or Hot-pocket for maries spino :/. WHICH ONE SUITS HIM BETTER GUYS......

[moeblob]

Happy Birthday to Ferdinand von Aegir!

I actually made 33 emotes, affectionately known as Aegirglyphics to some, for my own personal use on discord. However, I figure why not share some of them! They're free to use for discord servers/icons/pfps or whatever. However, my only request is Do NOT use them as subscriber emotes on Twitch. You can make them free follower emotes but you are not to make them locked behind a paywall.

[mueritos]

trying to be more accepting of the likelihood I am autistic, I feel ive been having this constant back and forth conversation with myself for the past 2 years about it. "you can go to school, be a therapist for people, run errands, win awards, and somehow fit 2 jobs into all of that" and I use that as proof that I am NOT autistic...however, realizing i lose an entire weekend for a trip? distress. fire alarm goes off in the middle of the night and leaves me trembling, crying, and forced to recover? oh boy i wonder why that happened. feeling confused and like i'm constantly missing something when people express themselves in class or in the workplace? hm, it's almost as if I struggle to not take their language literally.

i don't think i've ever been allowed to be "disabled" by whatever neurodivergency and its symptomology, like, ever. god speed any other neurodivergent children of immigrants, but i don't feel allowed to let any cluster of disturbances or schedule changes or social conundrums disable me. I mean, they can affect me privately, where I am forced to stim and cry and process all on my own. But unfortunately i cannot look like the misshapen freak I feel I am, or well, as least not appear so in a socially unacceptable way.

it's funny i carry so much shame. i am unmasking in ways i never thought i could. i am allowing myself to take things literally with people, and I am allowing myself to ask more questions. "what did you mean by that?" "why did you use that word to describe that?" "can you rephrase that?" it's funnier that I am at such a queer and neurodiverse internship; nearly all of the other clinical staff have some sort of diagnosis (usually adhd/ocd/with flavors of trauma), and we all serve a population of the queerest and most neurodiverse students. i feel SO happy when I see a student and they refuse to make eye contact with me, because I take it as an invitation to NOT look them in the eye too! i tell students during our sessions feel free to stim, here's a weighted plushie you can hold, sit where you like, would you like to pace, should I dim the lights? it is even funnier that i am a neurodivergent clinician working with neurodivergent people, and half the time I dont even follow the same advice I give my clients!

i worry about what my life will look like when i've graduated. my master's will say, "hey, this guy is a clinical social worker and is now ready to be your therapist! or caseworker! whatever they have you people do nowadays!" and I don't think i feel ready to enter any workforce. how on earth will i manage my life and wellbeing doing this 40 hours a week? like wtf? ugh.

i dunno. these r just rambles and perhaps im just seeking some sort of comfort from other autistic people, especially because it feels like i have very few autistic people in my life. i know a lot of the validation i seek will be "resolved" if i seek out an official diagnosis, but I don't have time or $ for that. nor do I think I want one for a number of reasons. I should just continue working on my own self-esteem when it comes to most likely being autistic.

oh well

[ivanttakethis]

So like………………. what was the point of Round 6?? 🤨

[achillvs]

basically spoiler free, but here's some thoughts.

i think in ep 3 of "misfits and magic 2" you can really see how doing 'worlds beyond number' impacted the gamestyle of the 4/5 of the cast of m&m.

the "evan incident" quickly changed the tone of the game, understandably, but i am still quite amazed how... committed to taking it slow lou, erika, brennan and aabria were. i think it's very fitting for sam to say the genuine, big words and continue with action - but also danielle is so relatable to me as a player in that. the GM has a whole story planned, we are on a schedule, let's do things, react with the world! pay homage to what's happened but also let's go, things have to happen! that's definitely what i would do too, and danielle did perfectly - her moments with evan after she got used to the emotional standstill were my favourite. but for the rest, it seems like their first instict was to dive deep already. lou allowed himself to pull away, he was ready for jammer to disbelieve the whole thing and aabria pulled with him. erika also pulled away to stay "in shock" - of course, it's a natural reaction, but I know in so many games none of this would be taken so introspectively, it would be quicker, channeled outward. brennan, who we know can't help but co-GM at times (in a good way, playing a PC in a way that aids the GM's job) says as evan "I fade away" and has to be brought back by sam. he does "help out" by saying evan's still on the mission, but it is much more reserved than he could've been. through the whole thing aabria was so focused on keeping the time progression to a minimum, truly joining the others in the haze of the moment when she really could've, you know, arthur aguefort it. you know she could, and more.

none of it is the original plot, part of the objective they had last episode even. it's purely reactive to a random event, but it's also mostly just emotional reaction. aside from jammer talking to the guy to find a solution (because it was offered, not because he sought it out), an "action" wasn't taken for like an hour of real time. they just allow themselves to sit for that hour and feel. and i cant help but see the wbn effect in play. it's commitment to the story, to the truth of the character vs the plot and the constraints of time-limited, scripted media. and it's incredible to watch outside of the podcast

[aka-indulgence]

Ok, what's your weirdest monster crush

Uh. Um. Ok. I, hm. I’m gonna ramble about something obscure and I think you’ll agree this is Out There but um,

THESE GUYS

I think I might be. The first on the internet to say “Hey I think I could have a relationship with one of these guys” 💀💀💀 LET ME EXPLAIN MYSELF

Because without prior knowledge and context im also like “what is this choice” jfsdfkgf

They’re from star control 2, also a game i watch clips of (obsessively at one time) to get the lore (and also there are certain game genres i’d get stressed in and this is one of them i think fkljfd) and these guys are the main antagonists- I’m going to do a really abridged version or else we’ll be here all day

Both used to be one race, got mind controlled for thousands of years and got split in two, had to fight through immense pain to free themselves, and due to their background they both have goals to get rid of the threat of ever being controlled again: one by controlling everyone else and the other by just. Killing them

Both have awesome themes and they speak with such authority and conviction/calm unrelenting confidence, and through all the alien races the protagonist meets in this game, they are the *current* biggest threat

I just like imagining some situation where you can. Teach them to accept other aliens… and maybe not change all of their minds but just one individual and I think that’s very romantic o(-(