#sorry if this is a bit disorganized and random

[kaialone]

Just some interesting details mentioned about Paracelsus in the Slash Beat Encyclopedia and the 10th Memorial Book:

He was originally a stone axe created during the final period of the Crusades (remember, they lasted like a 100 years.)

It's described that it'd display its full power by sucking up blood, even before it was a sentient being. (So, I'm assuming he was some kind of magical weapon from the start? I think Slash Beat Encyclopedia even indicates it might've been a bio-mechanical weapon, but that bit is not mentioned in the 10th Memorial Book, and that one's more recent. EDIT: Looking it over again, I realize it could've meant "creature-shaped" rather than bio-mechanical.)

Its transformation into a Magical Foci (though for the reference, this specific term wasn't applied to Paracelsus until Xrd, I believe) and gaining a sense of self is said to have been a gradual result of him absorbing too much blood. (There's some additional details about how Magical Foci in general are born from Xrd's GGW and onward that don't come up here yet)

He began to communicate and even started picking his own wielders and the like, and sought for a purpose in life through his achievements in battle.

[fluffymarshmalllows]

You're late

College au! Ford x Reader

summary: Ford and Reader in college origin

“Stanford, once I get your sorry ass it will be over for you!” Y/N huffed earning a scolding shh from the librarian as they watched their best friend, reach the book she needs from a higher shelf of the library.

She asked for Ford’s assistance but got fooled by his antics. He looked back sporting an aloof smile that ticked them off even more. Though, internally Y/N was still giddy at the fact Ford smiles at them like that after all these years.

Walking back to your table with a book less than what you needed for the project you were building to present at the science convention Ford blackmailed you to apply in.

Getting settled and comfy in the cold room, you look back at the memory fondly as he praised you and smooth talked (well, more of stated the blunt facts) that you are a great inventor, just a bit disorganized, which you can’t help but agree to.

You knew that, everyone around you knew that. It’s just that you find being smart…boring. Without something to think for or someone to compete against, the spark for it fizzles out.

Until you met Ford in Calculus lecture. He was actively participating in class, is has a pretty face and a helpful hand, a true eye candy. What struck you odd was he never fully raised his hand. Just a pen or a pencil, which curiosity got the best of you.

Boldly walking towards his desk after the bell rang, you reached out your hand introducing yourself. “Hi! I’m Y/N, nice to meet you” only to get a blank stare and a nod. “Stanford Pines”

Well that plan failed. As a true scientist, that shouldn’t stop you. But he kept his stuff and was out the door almost immediately leaving you dumbfounded. At least Fiddleford was there to bring you back to your senses.

Walking out to the hallway you can’t help but rant about it. “The nerve he has! I was just trying to be polite” you huffed as you were shoving your things in the locker. Fiddleford hummed in response, but offered his sincere advice “Y’know Y/N, what if he’s just awkward, even I was the first days I came ‘ere”. You slammed the locker door, “look McGucket, I appreciate the honesty but shouldn’t you be on my side?” Which earned a fit of laughter from your friend.

“Whatever, I’ll visit you later” You and Fiddleford went your separate ways as the bell rang for the next class. You entered the room while the professor was taking attendance. You ducked your head trying to look invisible and by god, did you wish you were. “L/N, you’re late, I’ll have you written up the next time this happens.” muttering your apologies he asked you to take the available seat, lo and behold, the only seat available is next to the Stanford Pines himself.

You meekly took your place, almost dropping the whole contents of your bag haphazardly shoved in it, trying to observe your seatmate while also paying attention to the discussion in front.

You didn’t know it was possible but he became more handsome upon closer inspection, little stubble of a beard and his thick lens glasses that perfectly frames his eyes. “Ehem” Ford cleared his throat drawing you out of your ogling.

You whispered “sorry, you look good” which turned his face so red like a bright tomato. He stammers for a bit trying to say something while avoiding your gaze. You found joy in pestering him but it will get boring in the long run, especially when he doesn’t retort.

Deciding that taking notes and listening was mind frying enough, and annoying your seatmate can get you in more trouble than it’s worth. You decided to take a nap, hand supporting your head trying to look like you’re still paying attention to whatever was being discussed.

It took a while before Ford realized his seatmate decided to not make a peep. He thought you just got tired of asking him random questions or you got enough of his attitude and will hate him forever.

Looking over at you, he did not fail to admire how angelic you look, how your hair perfectly falls over you face, how your lips looks kissable? What are these thoughts, he shook his head trying to focus on the equation the professor made, scribbling his own calculations on his notebook.

Until the professor threw a chalk nub hitting you straight in the forehead jolting you awake. This made Ford snicker causing you to blush of embarrassment. “Mx. Y/N, can you please tell the class the answer to this problem?”

You stared at the board long and hard before shrugging your shoulders and saying “Unsolvable, unless you want a negative answer that is impossible, no—improbable for the set of limits you’ve given”. The professor was stunned, so was Ford because of your bold claim. Everyone’s attention now shifted to you which in turn made you rise up from your seat, picking up the chalk thrown at you and head straight to the board.

While you were solving and explaining where the equation went wrong, Ford was just in awe on how you did it. Your intelligence and confidence was something he wished he have. He glanced over his own mess of solutions and realized that you are right, so did the professor nodded in agreement.

After that class, Ford just had to know how you figured it out easily so he gathered up all his courage and tapped you gently holding a pen on his other hand. Deep breath, easy,

You looked at him, and he looks like he’s about to self combust any second, “Need anything?” You asked smiling to ease his anxiety. It took him a while to process before remembering what he needs to ask you, “how?”

“What do you mean how?” Trying to figure out what he was trying to ask you after ignoring you a class before. “How did you know it was wrong? You were asleep” he pointedly asked you.

Trying not to take any offense you teased, “You were watching me sleep?”. “No!,” he sputtered “I just noticed, anyway nevermind” before he can grab his stuff you took the pen he was holding and started scribbling on his notes. “You’ll figure that every time this and this will come out its most likely a negative by the end,” pointing out the values to prove your statement right. While he was staring at the paper you finally noticed his hands, his digits to be exact.

“You have six fingers.” You said matter of factly, which made you feel rather stupid as soon as the words left your mouth. Of course he knew that already! It is his hands after all.

Ford is growing more self conscious by the second. He quickly said his thanks but not before dropping a notepad he was trying to fit in his bag and rushing out of the room.

You noticed a notepad before you left, thinking it was one of your things you kept it in your bag along with the random gadget you made to pass the time.

Arriving at the cafeteria, Ford and Fiddleford was already conversing and trading intel regarding some classes they both are in. You did not intrude since you still felt guilty for what you said the last time you conversed with Ford. Heading back to your dorm, you decided mid way to just cut the last classes and make something until Fiddleford is back to his room, maybe this time you’ll finally meet his roommate.

Your phone has been buzzing for quite a while now but you can’t seem to find it under all the wirings and spare parts for your next project. You wanted to make some sort of handheld x-ray but you needed guidance from your friend since he is leagues better at engineering than you’ll ever be.

“Finally!” picking up your phone tucked with a notepad you don’t remember buying. Before you even had the chance to check the contents, your phone rang again. Dropping the notepad in your bag along with the mini machine you answered the phone.

“Y/N wher’re ya? I’ve been trying to geta hold of yous since I got back” voice of Fiddleford you realized. “Oh shoot, my bad I lost track of time, I gotta show you something” Grabbing your bag and keys before heading to the door still on call with your friend. “Aight, you betcha be here soon if you want to meet the new roommate I was telling you about” click.

So much for a productive call. Keeping your phone in your pocket, you dashed all the way to the other side of the campus.

Arriving in their dormitory building, you were a heaving mess. Beads of sweat on your forehead with some stray hairs sticking to your face. Not the prettiest sight but by fate, you found yourself face to face with Ford Pines once again.

Ford was heading to back to campus to look for his sketchpad. It was a generic notepad that could easily be mistaken for anyone’s notebook. All his practice drawings are there, documenting things he seen and capturing the beauty of it through his drawings. It meant a lot for him and he fears that if the wrong person got a hold of that notebook it will be over for him, socially. Well not really, he didn’t have much social standing to begin with. He told his roommate he’d be out for a bit of “fresh air” not expecting to see you and all your gorgeous beauty albeit sweaty and disheveled.

Ford still thinks you are the prettiest person in the entire universe. But not like he’d admit to it this early.

Pleasantries were exchanged between the two of you before parting ways. Finally making it to Fiddleford’s dorm room. You knocked on the door repeatedly and hearing a faint “come in” was your cue to let yourself in. It was a new sight. The room was organized for once, yet stacks of books littered the other side of the room. You assumed it was Fiddleford’s roommate you still have not met.

“McGucket, I need your help” you pulled out the machine you were trying to build, showing it to him. “Tell me about it, kiddo” still focused on his computer coding. “Hand held x-ray machine! This will be revolutionary,” demonstrating your machine “You can even adjust it to go atomic level, or you supposedly can, I just can’t make it right.” tinkering with it. That got Fiddleford’s attention, “well jeez, this is still a tad advanced for me but I’ll see what I can do”. You tossed him the machine and exclaiming your thanks which he almost dropped giving you both the fright of a lifetime. Changing the topic, it was time to debrief about your day.

You took a deep breathe before starting “Well, there’s this guy…” unpacking your bag to keep your hands busy and taking this chance to organize.

Ford is at a lost, he has no clue on where his notepad can be. Not in the classroom, not in the cafeteria, not even in the lost and found area! He’s starting to lose hope as he retraced his steps. The classrooms reminded him of your interactions, he laughed to himself remembering how confident you were on stating the obvious. Which made him feel a little better. Then it dawned on him.

The notepad, he must have dropped it while packing up his things quickly. But it wasn’t in the rooms so there is a big chance you might have took it.

He ran back to his dorm hoping his roommate knows where to find you. He feels utterly stupid for not asking Fiddleford’s contact number so that he won’t run all the way back to his dorm room like a mad man.

It’s late afternoon by now and curfew will be soon so he has to act fast if he wants to get the notepad before you have the chance to open it.

“Fiddleford,” Ford says in between his gasps of air, “do you know where,” taking in more gulps of oxygen. “Take your time buddy”. Ford coughed before trying again “do you know where to find Y/N?”.

This was met with a raised eyebrow and a teasing look. Ford never had a knack for picking up subtle social cues but this was something so obvious its like a glaring sign. Fiddleford just nudged his head to Ford’s desk and there laid copper wiring rose and his missing sketchpad.

He quickly opened it and saw pencil doodles in the corner of the page complimenting his drawing skills and art style. Ford tried hiding his blush but his roommate was well aware of the blooming romance this will be.

At the latest drawing he made just hours before,

Call me ####### -y/n

On the bottom of his sketches of Y/N all through out the day, including a sketch of her sleeping in class. Fiddling with his phone, unsure what to do. He typed in the number and pressed call.

“Hello?” You mumbled answering the ringing of your phone. “Y/N you’ll be late for class again if you don’t get here in 5” that got your attention. You quickly kept your books and shamefully tried to wipe a drool stain on your notes. And as much as you love hearing Ford’s voice through the phone, you can not afford another write up, especially when you’re aiming to score higher than your best friend.

word count: 2.2k

would yah look at that another fic! requests are open (i'd love to write your ideas)

'till next post <3

[lightning-and-sparks]

Ranking the New Tracks (brutal)

Spoilers for 2025 maybe?

Disclaimer: your opinions are fine don’t let me cramp your style, I just happen to be a bummer.

Unstoppable.

I’m so sorry this just isn’t it. It’s believable to come from a Just Dance game but I would not use this one as a big promo song. The coach looks good but that’s about it. The background is mediocre. Looks like a Brezz map but worse, every original has its cheap copy lmao. The choreography is predictable which is a bummer.

Calabria.

Yeah okay. It’s cute and not that bad. This would’ve had a chokehold between me and my two sisters fighting over characters. I’m not sure why the unicorn is such a huge deal especially with the marketing but she’s cute so whatever. The background is really cool and adds to the lore of them being humans trapped in the game. Song is odd but fine and choreography seems ok.

Yes, and?

This map is so ugly I’m so sorry. I know everyone seems into this one but man, it looks so disorganized. Why are they in a basement looking ass museum? The random foot is so funny it saves it a bit. The coaches are ugly and the background looks unfinished. It’s a pass for me but ik missions are going to be linked to this one.

Basket Case

If you know me by now this song is right up my alley. The background fits the vibes and reminds me of blue’s clues which is fun. I hate the other coaches on the left and right. They are so out of place but this whole map kinda looks weird so not as jarring as Yes, And? by any means. Can’t wait to play it seems solid enough.

Poker Face

This is tough because I love the Gaga maps but seems kinda… cluttered. Theming is strange considering you already have the card suit motif at your disposal… oh wait it’s there just poorly executed. How many of you immediately knew the people in black are the club and spade suit? Yeah, readability is poor. Also, there are four card suits so why are you jamming hearts and diamond together instead of making a fourth coach? There are already so many three coach routines in the previews. Also, are you guys riding the high of the Darkest Hour floating heads because why are they everywhere?

[chrobinsane]

Sorry for the random message, but I’m just curious :,) I saw you love Susie and Julie as well, do you have any headcanons for them? :) I love hearing other people’s hc’s! ^^

No need to apologize! Julie and Susie fans are always welcome here <3

Here’s some of my hcs for them:

- Julie doesn’t like being told “I’d die for you”, so Susie tells her “I’d kill for you” instead

- Julie loves PDA. She will happily hug, hold hands, kiss, etc Susie and loves seeing her get very shy because of it

- Susie is always trying to steal Julie’s flannels (she doesn’t get away with it, but Julie lets her wear them sometimes)

- In my modern au, they have a daughter named Lily. She has Susie’s face and freckles and Julie’s hair and eyes. She’s a surprisingly calm kid and likes to be independent. Susie is a bit of a worrier but a very caring mom, and Julie is more of a fun mom

- Adding onto the modern au, the two of them moved to the city, and Julie became a forensics analyst, while Susie works at a lil cozy crafts store

- They like to take items that survivors bring into the trial, especially Susie who is a bit of a kleptomaniac. They both gave each other unique wedding rings

- Julie actually has had a crush on Susie for a while, but she didn’t ask Susie out because she believed Susie deserved someone better. I think a lot of people interpret Susie as being more invested in their relationship, but I see it more like Julie loves Susie as much as Susie loves her, she’s just a lot more stoic and keeps her emotions bottled up

- Lastly, idk if this counts as a headcanon, but I think Julie and Susie really click and understand each other more than anyone else in their lives. They just get each other 🧡🤍💗

I really hope you liked my disorganized rambling about the crime girlfriends, thank you for giving me an excuse to go off about them <3

[danganronpadedication]

Request: Yasuhiro Hagakure x s/o general Headcanons

Yasuhiro Hagakure x GN! S/O General Relationship Headcanons -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Wow, I'm so surprised to see yet another Hiro liker! I think he's awesome, he's very good comic relief and he's got a heart of gold. Which apparently a couple shady individuals are after, but hey. Sorry about the wait on this one, I'm an active uni student lol. - Mod Tsumugi --------------------------------------------------------------------------- 1. Hiro is a very laid-back and relaxed person, and that carries over into your relationship. His easygoing nature helps balance out any tense situations you two might encounter. He doesn't get stressed over small details, and will often try to calm you down if you're feeling anxious. Granted, he's not the best when handling comforting other people, but he tries his best.

2. Hiro isn't the most reliable person, he's very scatter-brained and disorganized, so it's up to you to keep him on track most days. He doesn't often think things through all the way, but his heart is in the right place. Expect a sense of spontaneity in your date plans, as he'll try and surprise you at every turn. He might forget to text you back, but he'll make it up with a silly apology, and a heartfelt gesture.

3. As the Ultimate Clairvoyant, he'll always offer to do readings for you, especially when you're uncertain about something coming up. Though his predictions are pretty hit or miss, it's amusing to see how much he believes in his own fortune-telling abilities.

4. Hiro might not be the type to fight, but he is surprisingly protective of you. He would try to diffuse conflict with humor or by “predicting” the outcome to avoid danger. He’d do anything to keep you out of trouble, even if it means running away from danger together.

5. He believes in following your dreams and will always encourage you to pursue what makes you happy. He might not have the best track record with his own schemes, but he’ll always be your biggest supporter, whether you're trying something new or struggling with a big decision. Expect him cheering for you the loudest.

6. Hiro often ends up in ridiculous situations, which provide plenty of entertainment in your relationship. Whether it’s getting scammed by someone for the third time this week or showing up with a new “get rich quick” scheme, his antics definitely provide you with some entertainment.

7. Expect random hugs, silly compliments, whatever he can do to show you he cares in minimal ways. He's very casual about it, he won't be calling you over the top pet names, but you will definitely know he loves you.

8. He's a conspiracy theory nut, especially the outlandish ones, and will frequently go on rants about whether or not the moon is hollow or if lizard people run the government. He gets really excited when you humor him, and let him talk your ear off about it. While you may not always believe him, his enthusiasm is contagious.

9. He’s the kind of guy who thinks he's being cool, but in reality, he’s a bit of a lovable dork. Though he'll probably get pretty defensive about it lmao. Be nice to him <3

10. His love language is probably either acts of service, or words of affirmation. He's also a bit of a momma's boy, you will be hearing him talk about Hiroko (not me projecting cause I love Hiroko). In the rare case you get into a disagreement, Hiroko will probably be the one talking some sense into him lmao.

------------------------------------------------------------------- You sat on the park bench, watching Yasuhiro fumble through his deck of tarot cards with an exaggerated sense of importance. He was determined to give you a "perfect" reading, even though his last attempt ended in him predicting that you'd somehow bring the dinosaurs back to life?

"Alright, babe, this time it's gonna be 100% accurate," he said, shuffling the cards like a pro—or at least trying to. One slipped out and fluttered to the ground, and he quickly bent down to retrieve it, grinning sheepishly. "Whoops. Just the universe messing with us."

You couldn't help but laugh. "I don’t think that’s how the universe works."

He shot you a playful wink. "Ah, you just don’t understand the mystical forces yet." With a grand flourish, he laid out the cards, and after a dramatic pause, his face lit up. "Oh, wow! It says here you're about to have a sudden adventure with someone incredibly handsome."

"Really?" You raised an eyebrow, playing along. "Who might that be?"

"Obviously me!" He shot up from the bench, grabbing your hand with a grin so wide you couldn’t help but smile back. “C'mon, let's go somewhere fun. I don’t know where yet, but the cards say it'll be awesome.”

"Hiro," you started, laughing as he tugged you to your feet, "You didn’t even finish the reading!"

He waved a hand dismissively. "Eh, it was probably just gonna say something cheesy like, 'You're destined to be with the best fortune-teller ever.'"

You rolled your eyes, a wide smile on your face. Hey, who were you to tell the cards they were wrong?

[teabeexo]

Hello! I saw your post about OC asks, and I'm curious about question #23 (how organized/disorganized are they? How does it manifest in their life?).

HELLO DOLL IM SO SORRY IT TOOK ME FOREVER TO ANSWER!! Let me blabber 🗣️🔥

Winona is pretty disorganized in the general sense of the word. Most people would look at her workspace and think it’s absolutely in shambles — but it’s not so! Trust her, Winona has her own method of madness to follow. She has pretty intense ADHD anyways, and working in an environment just meshes with her brain. Too much perfect rigidity can actually be kind of disorienting for her.

Luella is probably relatively average when it comes to how well-kept her spaces are. She does need some kind of a system, otherwise she gets kind of overwhelmed. A busy surrounding can make her anxiety worse, so she tries to keep things relatively tidy. Her and Derek’s bedroom is very clean usually (with the help of Derek in maintaining it), but it’s mostly her bathroom that gets out of control. She doesn’t wear that much makeup, but she tends to just leave stuff on the counter and let it pile up while she’s in the zone, which leads to clutter. Her workspace is much the same.

Vérène is extremely neat in comparison to her friends, and that’s really just because of how her mom taught her to take care of her personal spaces. A lot of the hobbies she enjoys also requires a certain amount of organization, so it really just becomes second-nature to her. It’s also kind of comforting/soothing for her to clean, so sometimes she’ll end up getting carried away.

Mina isn’t super tidy, but also not terrible with her organization. She has an unfortunate habit of stacking papers and just shoving them into a drawer — but that’s usually a problem for future her. Her house can get a bit messy because she likes having trinkets and stuff, so she’ll sometimes just sit down with Qiu and figure out what needs to go. Her disorganization is less about being inherently untidy and more about nostalgia.

Maël, despite his best efforts, is absolutely terrible at maintaining order in his house. He sits things down and immediately forgets where he put it, which leads to moving more items in the search for it. He tosses things it random places and loses small stuff very easily. He tries, really.

[ghosts-of-wars-past]

Oh, you work for a version of my husband, don't you? What's it like working down in the archives in your world?

-Céline Bouchard ( @pupil-of-the-eye )

Fuckin' hell... We need a PSA for people to STOP marrying the Elias Bouchards of the world you guys don't know what kind of bullshit you're in for. Seriously. Let the line die out, enough with the Bouchards.

Well I'll answer the question, I guess. At first it was pretty disorganized and kind of random, I basically picked what I did everyday because no one told me anything. Then there was that bit I was a secret agent for Jon.

These days I am quite frankly not doing shit apart from playing candy crush. Okay and a bit of messing the place up and a significant amount of plotting your dear hubby's demise for being a bag of dicks. Sorry please tell him to fire me I can't deal with the shit energy in the office.

[catsockpuppet]

you should tell us more abt the spooky month x death blossoms au!! like. any ramble or funfact you have stored in ur head :3 (/nf)

OHOHOH I HAVE A LOTBUT I REALLLYY WANNA WRITE A FIC RIGJT NOW SO. BOOm

there was a small, messy stack of papers on the counter, nothing too out-of-ordinary. in the most loving way possible, john was a messy, disorganized man. so garnet usually ignored when her father left some random case report on the kitchen table or next to the sink. although,, something about today’s paper caught her eye.

sorry about this one dad, she mentally apologized. it felt wrong to shift through the papers, but you know curiosity killed the cat and all that—

“i told you there’s a cult!” garnet confidently shouted. slamming down a seemingly random paper she grabbed from the stack onto the counter.

calix just,, blinked. very disinterested and very very tired.

he was in no mood to deal with garnet’s conspiracies right now, no matter how much he loved her.

“no- calix, look,”

calix glanced down, “wow, a paper. great.”

“why are you like this?”

he shrugged

whatever, guess she’d just need to prove it to him.

“we’re going to the house tonight.” it wasn’t a question, it was a statement.

“i don’t have an option—”

“you don’t.”

…

“shitshitshit.” john fumbled through the papers on his desk, throwing any papers that he didn’t need (which was all of them) onto the floor.

“what are you doing?” jack’s voice questioned from the doorway behind him.

“trying to find something- those documents i had on the cult. i can’t find them.”

jack stayed silent, not because he didn’t care or anything but because he was just confused.

“fuck- what if they stole them?? what if they’re onto me?”

“oh, i doubt that—”

“we have to act. now.” he decided abruptly.

…

the house was dark, creaky, the kind of thing you’d see in a horror movie- actually, that was calix’s reasoning for not wanting to enter. that it was idiotic and only going to get them killed.

“this is how horror protagonists die, garnet.” he’d grumbled as the two trudged up the hill.

well, now she was starting to agree, maybe this wasn’t the best idea.

they heard an echoing scream somewhere in the house. garnet gripped the bat she’d brought a bit harder.

okay

this was not a good idea.

aaaaann’ i’m done :3

@cursedthing

[ssreeder]

HI HELLO!! I JUST FINISHED “Into the Fire” A COUPLE DAYS AGO!!

I would say my thoughts about it but I have too many thoughts but I also don’t wanna fill your asks with 20 million anons so,

after I finished it I decided to re-read from LIAB and bro…

That shit broke me.

The way you perfectly constructed sokka’s arc, like I swear everything was intentional

He literally went from “it took years for him to get comfortable killing” to “he was always so good with people, that’s was before he started killing them” and from “if he felt a way about something he would most definitely share it” to literally hiding everything that happened to him from people he trusts. Wow.

Once again, absolutely amazed by your incredible writing skills, like actually impeccable.

Enough of me being philosophical,

YOU GAVE BATO A BF!!! HE CAN FINALLY GET OVER HIS HIGH SCHOOL CRUSH!!! AND JEE GETS TO BE HAPPY!!! AAAAHHH!! I’m so happy for them (ik they aren’t even an item yet but still, super happy for them)

Hooray for Ara!! She got her closure, and now she can start a new, healthier, happier lifestyle. Congratulations to my favorite violent dog!! May she get what she deserves (ominous)

But the way she just.. told Katara about zukka being together?? Like, no hesitation.

“Whoops, thought you were banging my brother. Sorry lol.”

“No lmao it’s okay. Zuko’s deff banging him though”

“WHAT?!”

“Yeah lol. Toodles!!”

And then she just- LEAVES?? honestly mood though.

i liked how sweet and genuine she sounded when explaining zukka’s love story though, that was so good of her, she didn’t even talk them down or anything. It was actually so nice.

Can’t wait to see what you do for Jet, really really hope my little street rat gets better. on agni we gonna get you some will to live!!

So many exciting things happening I can’t wait!!

-suki closure!!

-TOPH AND SOKKA BONDING!!!

-IROH AND SOKKA’S TEA TALK!!!!!

literally have said this a million times but actually super scared for sokka for the last bit (zhao tea talks usually didn’t go well)

But I also feel like ur gonna make that an iroh pov… (I’m an empath) so I’ll stay tuned!!

Yue and La bless my favorite water tribe man Hakoda! He loves his kids so much I hope nothing bad happens to them (this is gonna be foreshadowing isn’t it?)

But anyways!!

I wanted to finally tell you about music!!

It’s gonna be a lot of mitski cus she’s one of my main artists I listen to but still,

I thought about “once more to see you” by mitski A LOT throughout RIA and a little bit now through ITF, it fits this part of the story perfectly (in my opinion). It’s literally just zukka through sokka’s pov.

Another one is “Christmas Kids” by ROAR, this one is more for LIAB, and a little bit of RIA, (can you tell I make the edits in my head?) But this time the choruses/verses change pov or can just be seen as multiple characters.

“First Love/Late Spring” by mitski fits zukka through zuko’s pov

And “I bet on loosing dogs” by mitski is Ara with zhao/shen

Now this one is very specific:

“Vampire Empire” by Big Thief

The first verse to the first chorus is LIAB-RIA kataang through aang’s thoughts about katara,

the second verse to the second chorus is zukka LIAB-RIA (and now more recently the current ITF situation) told as per sokka’s pov

And the third verse to the final chorus is how Ara feels about zhao. Like their entire history.

Okay that’s it sorry for bombarding you with my random ass disorganized ask 😭 I’ve been yapping too much, I know, I sound like Reho. Sorry if I said anything disrespectful!!

Anyway!! Can’t wait for the next update!! STAY SUPER DUPER AMAZING SSREEDER!!!

HI ANON WHO I ADORE & LOVE SO MUCH I AM SO SORRY FOR TAKING 10000 YEARS TO ANSWER THIS. (In my defense it’s a perfect 10/10 ask and I couldnt let it go right away<3)

I AM SO SO SO SO SO SOOOOOO happy you enjoyed sokkas arc because damn, I really dismantled him throughout the series and the way you highlighted some of the details about sokka pre prison and how he did a drastic 180 is *CHEFS KISS* yeahhhhhh it was a long process but I’m glad you noticed the intentional dedication I had to ruining our boy sokka <3 (i know I know he’s not ruined but he’s not in a great spot mentally but he’s getting better but hell regress and progress and regress and yeah sokkas just not the same I mean but we will love him and he’s still our SOKKA)

JEE DID GET HIMSELF A BOY FRAND… He is smitten with our boy Bato it’s cute.

Ara is hilarious that’s all I gotta say about her haha.

JET!!!!! I love him!!! He’s not the besttttt influence on Suki but FUCK IT JET IS AWESOME (don’t expect any life changing shit from him but I’m excited that he’ll stay a part of the story) sorry Jet haters he’s staying in LIAB till death does us part of the story ends haha.

oh shit you sent this ask before the last chapter was dropped so now you know ITS AN IROH AND ZUKO TEA TALK (& let me tell you HAAAAA… they’re wonderful in a room together haha)

I was trying to listen to all your songs before I answered your ask but I couldn’t get through all of them, but I will!! I love that you are so passionate about music and the scenes and characters I feel the same way and that’s why I always try to give you songs I’m vibing with lol.

THANK YOU AGAIN ANON AND PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE DONT BE SHY COME BACK ANY TIME I LOVE YOUR ASK!!!!

[tndn-btg]

hi you can call me euclid

im 22, they/it. system. queer. intersex. butch. white.

i love horror movies, athf, smiling friends, madness combat, tf2, fallout and a bunch of other stuff! my favorite bands right now are sleep token & fall out boy, and i have a special interest in horror media in general :]

just general tidbits/a bit of a dni below the cut

i talk about my npd, did, bpd, autism and mental health overall a lot. not as in venting, but just my world experiences and rambles about it. if you believe in concepts like narc or borderline abuse, or you don't believe in did/ramcoa/believe in false memories causing DID you're not gonna be my friend and i won't engage with you so don't bother

i struggle a lot with talking, i have psychosis/possible schizophrenia & that causes me disorganized speech, if i misuse metaphors or pronounce words wrong please don't make fun of me, and gently let me know, it's not on purpose and i don't like being mocked for it

i smoke weed. Like 80% of the time im high. Keep this in mind when you talk to me

i infodump a lot

i do not sign my posts based off of fronters or disclose information about my alters. do not ask me to publically post information about it

i take self shipping seriously. sorry in advance

i do not care about concepts like rpf or factkinning. i do not know if anyone cares about that anymore but i follow rpf blogs and factkinners. this does not extent to tcc, i do not support tcc

i don't care about any huge discourse topics people argue about. i won't like you if you publically post your bizzaro incest shota porn or are a nazi but it's very hard to get under my skin with stuff like that

love random dms asks and so fourths :) i am not scary and i accept all variety of freaky weirdos in my dms i love making friends

[beautouslysandy]

Cars And Cupcakes

Steve Randle x GN!Reader

By- Sandy

Warning: A bit of language

Word Count- 492

Note- First time writing Steve, hope y'all like it!

-You and Steve are very different from eachother, he doesn’t mind getting messy and is disorganized you however are a very clean and neat individual, he isn’t very bright and you are a very clever person. I could go on forever but if there is something you guys can bond over it is cars and sweet treats. You love baking and aren’t to shabby at it, Steve loves your cupcakes.

“Okay…”You said softly as you carried a big brown box into DX

“Steve?!” You called as you set down the box carefully on the counter

“Y/N?” A familiar voice called in confusion

“Yes…”You replied as you saw Sodapop walking out of the garage. “Hey, Soda” You said with a smile, you going it was Steve but you obviously don’t say that

“You looking for Steve?” He asked with a smile

“Yeah” You replied with a soft smile “He’s back here working on car, come in” He said waving his hand towards to garage.

“Okay then” You said picking up the box and following Sodapop.

“Steve, Y/N’s here” Sodapop informs as he steps into the garage

You have only been back in the garage once, to fix up your car, or more so Steve fixing your car and you handing him the tools.

“Oh, hey babe!” Steve called joyful from under a car

“I have cupcakes!” You said with a cheery smile. You heard a bang from under the car “Shit!” You heard your boyfriend scream

“You good, Steve?” Sodapop asked with a painful face

“Yeah just hit my head on the engine.” Steve groaned as he wheeled out from under the car

He walked over after putting his tools back in the toolbox, he had a big red mark on his forehead.

“Oh god, I am so sorry” You sighed.

“Hey. You brought cupcakes, don’t be sorry about anything.” He said opening the box to show chocolate cupcakes with deep chocolate icing.

“My favorite!” Steve gleamed fist bumping Sodpop

You chuckled, you loved baking sweet treats for your boyfriend and surprising him with them. He always had the cutest face when he saw what kind they were, typically chocolate. “Thanks Y/N!” Sodapop cheered taking one

“Mhm, no problem Soda” You said glad Steve wasn’t going to be the only one eating them, if he did he would bouncing off the walls. “Hey! These are my cupcakes!” Steve said angrily

“Technically there Y/N’s cupcakes” Sodapop said laughing as he walked away eating the cupcake

“Thank you, Y/N! I love you!” He cheered as he took a cupcake or two and kissed you on the cheek

Your face got a little pink “You're welcome, where do you want me to place them, down?” You asked with a smile

“Over there, thanks babe.” He said sitting down a random stool.

“Your welcome.” You said placing the box down and heading over to Steve and placing a kiss on his cheek.

He kissed you on the lips “I love you.” is what he said after y’all’s lips parted.

“I love you too.” You said softly

“Wanna help me with the car?” He asked excitedly stuffing the cupcake in his mouth.

“Oh god, Steve. Yes I will help you with the car.” You laughed at your boyfriend childish ways.

Steve wheeled under the car agian and asked politely “Wrench, please” holding out his hand

“What’s that?” You asked confused

“Oh glory…” He chuckled

[salubriousbean]

OHH MY GOSH THAT FINALE

IT MADE ME FEEL SO MANY THINGS !!!!!

(Spoilers below the cut)(very disorganized because I spewed this all out and then immediately went to bed bc it's late)

OKAY FIRST OFF THE MUSIC????!!!?!?!?!?!? LIKE HELLO THATS AMAZING I CANT WAIT FOR THE SOUNDTRACK TO BE RELEASED! LIKE AT THE BEGINNING THE MUSIC AND OHH MY GOSH THE E N D WITH OMEGA'S THEME?!!! WORDS CANNOT EXPRESS HOW MUCH I LOVE IT

AND ADULT OMEGA??!!!!!!!!!!! WITH THE REBELLION??!!! Okay but seriously her outfit tho like I desperately want that jacket, and her hair is so cute! And Hunter's bandana! AND GONKY! AND LULA! AND TECH'S GOGGLES! Oh you can bet imma be drawing a lot of omega over the next few months (or at least trying to every so often)

Okay anyways let's rewind a bit (these are all out of order) BUT LIKE CROSS'S HAND?? THAT CX WAS RUTHLESS OHMYGOSHH

AND THEN YES THE DRAMATIC BRIDGE SCENE IN THE RAIN!!! RIP Scorch but like DANG HEMLOCK GOT RIDDLED (he deserved it)

AND JT WAS SO FUNNY WHEN OMEGA JUST STABBED HIM LIKE BAHAHHA

Though, I did wonder why she didn't just make herself dead weight instead of running with Hemlock to the bridge. It would have slowed him down a lot more but maybe Scorch wouldn't let her (or I just didn't see, I know I missed some details).

SPEAKING OF DETAILS I MISSED, EVA TIED THE PRISON-LULA TO HER BACK??? Thanks for filling in the gaps tumblr lol

Also, I wonder how they made the Zillo's screeching bc I swear that was on another level like what the heeeck

Also I'm sad we didn't get to find out who CX-2 was, or if it was just another random clone (whoever he was he was kickbutt tho). And ngl the whole time Echo was talking to the prisoners (!!dramatic clone speech!! Like fives's speeches!!) I was peering for any sign of Dogma's tattoo

Also Hemlock, isn't that gas like a war crime or something? And the prisoner torture thing? I haven't read much of the Geneva Conventions but I'm pretty sure that's against international laws (well at least on Earth, you'd hope in the galaxy far far away as well)

ALSO!! THE C H I L D R E N !!!!! THEY'RE ADORAVLE AND I LOVE THEM SO MHCH AND I LOVE SEEJNG THEM AND THE CLONES ALL HAPPY ON PABU AND EATING SPACE ICE CREAM though Eva, Jax, Sami,Bayrn, and the other prisoners need new clothes lol

ALSO YES EMERIE I LOVE HER CHARACTER AND CHARACTER ARC ITS SO GOOD AND SHES AAAAHHH "You have my word" or something like that THE MANDO INSTINCTS KICKING IN

And I love her convo with Echo, about being free

AND THE SCENE UNDER THE TREE??*CHEFS KISS* BEAUTIFUL 10/10

That reminds me, the line "Clone Force 99 died with Tech" is so sad 😢

Gosh the voice acting is so good dsfjavlkakgsslsdgldgksdltdys

Also (sorry I'm using that word a lot lol) I totally though older Omega was Phee when she was going into the cave for some reason or like Phee with a different hairstyle BUT I LOVE OMEGA SO MUCH SHES SO STRONG AND UMM I ALREADY WANT HER ADVENTURES IN THE REBELLION

I'm so glad none of the batch died in that attack (but also their accelerated aging makes me so sad). Also I love how Hunter offers their help to Omega even though they're not in the physical condition they used to be. He's so loyal, they're all so loyal to each other. That's not a weakness (glares at Hemlock). I love the loyalty of the clones, built in shared experiences and trials.

Okay my typings getting worse so I'll maybe return tomorrow with more thoughts

[living-a-charmed-life]

hiii!!

saw your post about shifting advice from spirits or messages from people in your dr and whatnot and i would really like a reading if you wouldn’t mind🫶

tbh lately been feeling like i’m at a point where i don’t need or want advice with shifting but i think a message from someone in my DR would be cool! but tbh don’t actually know any specific people i would want one from

could you pick someone random or would i have to know? i’m really sorry but i’m just very inexperienced with readings and stuff like that so i’m not sure how detailed or not detailed i should be

Hi! I can do a reading for someone random from your dr. When doing this reading, I'm asking for messages from someone in your dr that cares about you! Hope that's okay!

This person's message is that you are very strong. You have lots of resilience and passion. Your strength inspires this person, but you need to take action on your ideas. You are also very generous. You need to stop delaying things, however. Put your anxiousness aside. You are not failing.

Seeing repeating 8's is a good sign.

Also, I got the message that you are disorganized, so maybe that might be something to work on? I was a bit confused by that honestly

[em-writes-stuff-sometimes]

I don’t know why I had this random thought popped up in my head all of a sudden but I feel like what the thing Alicent is most jealous of Rhaenyra is her motherhood like we all know that even though Alicent is resentful towards rhaenyra bc rhaenyra does essentially gets treated like the bby of the family in which she can pretty much do whatever she wants w/o consequence from her father (kind of giving me the eldest sister who suffers the most consequence from her actions & held to a more higher standard vs the youngest who gets away with everything, which is understandable but I lost empathy w/ Alicent a bit when she lets it consumes her & extend it to her children to cause even further división even though it’s not 100% her fault in a way that her shit of a father warped her into this person but still as an adult she’s also aware of what she’s doing but anyways..) but when I watch Alicent along with her children, there’s such a disconnect between them vs when I watch rhaenyra along w/ her children, there’s so much emotions, love, & bonding that I can’t help but think further cause her resentment towards rhaenyra bc not only she gets favorable treatment but motherhood just comes naturally towards her as well. Idk, sorry for the disorganized ramblings, it’s just what stuff like this pops in my head it takes me for a ride lol

Hey, nonnie!

I really like this analysis. I do think a lot of her resentment comes from this, too, on reflection. Alicent was only a child when she started having children; I'm sure on many levels she feels frozen at that age. It makes sense to me, the respective casting of her children and her - I know there's criticism of how there's like NO age gap IRL between the casting for the characters of a mother and her children, but I appreciate how this highlights Alicent's juvenility at the time she gave birth. In many respects, she's stuck where her children have aged from the neglect they've received. Sorta an incidental casting flub that makes for some really interesting symbolic subtext to the narrative the show is presenting.

All this in mind, there's no wonder that Alicent would come to feel envy for Rhaenyra. Her role in society is marriage and motherhood, and she is not able to excel at either by virtue of circumstances out of her control. Still, she pushes for duty and devotion, because she's good and she's been raised to do the right thing. And then you have Rhaenyra, who has "flouted all" and done as she liked, and yet somehow has managed to achieve her societal goals and do it better than she has. Her children clearly idolise her; she first has Laenor, who was friendly enough with her to willingly claim her sons, and then Daemon, who while a wild card is evidently in her corner; and she even holds the vaunted title of heir over Alicent's sons. It must be infuriating. I don't blame her for that. I do blame her for how she's acted on those feelings, though. Well, blame isn't the word for it. More that I think it's dangerous in ANY respect to use someone's past trauma as a catch-all to absolve them of wrongdoing. Alicent is not a good person, but that doesn't mean she didn't also have a horrible youth and a right in her own mind to behave the way she has.

Lol, sorry for my disorganised and rambling response! It makes me froth to think of all the baggage these characters have. It's why I cannot truly despise any of them (notwithstanding the fact that it's just a show and none of it is real, of course). They all have their own damage and they do bad things because of that. What a fucked-up world they live in. Give me more of it!

[edwinspaynes]

If the TLH Squad Had the Internet: A Companion to Social Media Headcanons

I am sorry, my Matthew and Thomastair biases are emerging again, please accept me

The first thing Matthew does when he connects to ye olde world wide web is turn to the rest of the group. "this is cool," he says. "i'm going to use it to download stageplays illegally, find sexually explicit materials, and watch videos of cute animals playing."

Alastair looks at him with SUPREME judgment. "This device contains the entirety of human knowledge, no one is ever going to use it for that. Don't be stupid."

Matthew shrugs and goes back to his illegal stageplay downloads. "I think that's exactly what people will use it for."

Alastair is interested in the internet because it is a New Thing. He begins to research it a bit. He's reading essays on the internet, how it was formed, how it works, how to navigate it. He especially learns how to protect his privacy online.

Matthew accepts ALL cookies. He thinks he will get literal cookies. Alastair, who has learned about cookies, just lets it happen.

Thomas and James decide to pull a prank on Matthew and Alastair. They painstakingly figure out how to order GrubHub and get Insomnia Cookies delivered. Matthew takes this as an enormous win because he was right, he got cookies. Alastair can suck it.

Thomas and James both find food delivery fascinating. They learn that they can eat whatever they want if they press a few buttons. They do not really understand that they're paying for it. They order like 20 pounds of Pad Thai.

Thomas also is extremely interested in podcasts. He can hear people speaking other languages and learn new things with the touch of a button. He likes Lexicon Valley, and he just starts listening to it. He listens to it for hours while everything goes on around him. It's cool.

Eventually, Thomas shows Alastair Spotify. Alastair thinks Spotify is the coolest thing because he can listen to classical music and ghazals whenever he wants to. He winds up making several playlists.

He hates modern music and has decided that it is The Enemy. Matthew discovers Shake It Off and loves it. He plays it loudly and it's only 50% to annoy Alastair.

Matthew becomes a huge Swiftie.

Alastair's playlists are extremely organized in a way that fascinates both James and Matthew, who have just ❤ed random shit they like in the most disorganized way.

James and Matthew also figure out that they can make joint playlists, which is pretty cool.

James downloads the Kindle app on his phone and has realized that he can read books on his device. He thinks it's really cool because he can take the books anywhere, but he ultimately decides he doesn't like it because it doesn't smell or feel like a book.

Matthew, who is a World Traveler, likes the app so much that he orders an actual Kindle. Now he doesn't need to lug books about as he travels the world, and he can always have the Complete Works of Oscar Wilde with him. It works.

Cordelia is mostly confused with how the keyboard works because she ran her hand across it once and it automatically made words. She realized that she doesn't need to type the words manually and wants to emulate that. She can't figure out that she needs to run her fingers over the letters in the configurations of the words she wants to make.

Eventually, she does get there and gasps. She shows James. This has rocked his world. Both of them now refuse to type like normal people and Alastair casts solid judgment on them. He thinks that the dragging-your-fingers method is not only lazy, but ineffective because of their many typos. (He is correct).

Cordelia also uses this opportunity to learn more about Cortana as it exists in the crown jewels. She's baffled to learn the facts of this Cortana as it is so different from her own sword. She finds it moderately uncomfortable that there's a second Cortana in the Tower of London.

Like Alastair, she likes reading essays on JStor. Matthew thinks this is a weird way to use the internet.

Matthew has downloaded so much illegal music at this point it's insane.

Lmk if you want a Part 2 :)

[ddlcsprite]

Murder warning!

DDLC | Yuri.chr | encrypted file

If you found this note in a small wooden box with a heart on it, then *congratulations!* You are probably the first person to read this. I didn’t really plan on sharing this with anybody, but for some reason I think it’s exciting that somebody out there, a complete stranger, will come across this note and read my story. Someone I will never meet, sharing such a personal bond with me. I’m fascinated that either one of us could die — even as soon as tomorrow — with the other being completely clueless to the fact. To you, my entire life is within this note, and so I will live for as long as your memory can carry me. Writing this, I’m wondering if that makes you feel fascinated or violated. It’s so exciting.

I’m sorry if my story is a bit disorganized, but I’d like to get it down while it’s still fresh on my mind. First, I’ll tell you a little bit about myself. I’m a first-year college girl and have led, by most standards, a pretty unspectacular life up to this point. I grew up in an upper-middle class school district with decent teachers. I did track in middle school and some of high school, and I’ve had two boyfriends. Now, I’m studying for a career in occupational therapy, because I feel the field is undervalued and provides tremendous help to people.

I’m giving you this background because there’s this strange misconception that if you want to kill someone then you’re either sick in the head or you have anger management issues. But, it’s very apparent that I don’t fall into either of those categories. It’s true that most murder cases are in a domestic setting where someone loses control of their anger or something. But the thing is that those people kill under provocation, whether by a singular outburst or by a slow-burning series of misfortunes. Those people kill because in that brief moment, they want a specific someone, for a specific reason, to be hurt or killed.

What I’m talking about is wanting to kill someone for no specific reason, maybe just to see what it’s like. Do you ever get that? I wouldn’t know how others feel, because it’s not something I ever talked about. But I’ve been curious about what it’s like to kill someone ever since I was a child. Not killing anyone in particular, just a random person. It’s always just fascinated me that if I put my mind to it, I can approach anyone, and in five minutes they would be completely gone from this Earth.

But I’ve never done so for a couple of reasons. First of all, for most of my life it was logistically impossible for me to do it without getting caught. I only got my driver’s license a couple years ago, and even then, the preparations would take too much time, definitely stirring suspicion. It was only once I started college that I realized this was no longer an obstacle.

Another reason is that I was afraid of causing harm to too many people. You might laugh reading that, at how hypocritical it sounds. But, let me explain: Why should I feel bad about killing someone if they’re too dead to care? Who would I be feeling bad for? Contrarily, it’s the grief of the living that I’d rather not be responsible for. Because of this, I knew it would take a good deal of research before finding a suitable person to kill, and I’ve never had the means to do so — again, until I started college.

And now, having just experienced it, I’d say it was pretty satisfying in the end. Something I would try again? Probably not, since my curiosity has already been satisfied. It really wouldn’t be the same a second time.

But anyway, if by any chance you’re also curious to kill someone, then you’re welcome to take notes. :)

***

I started a hobby of people-watching soon after I entered college. People-watching is interesting to me because it’s taking one of the infinite extras in your life and turning them into a main character — without them knowing, of course. It’s so easy to forget that every single one of the hundreds of strangers you pass every day has a life story as deep and complex as your own. One thing I noticed about people-watching, and wanting to kill someone, is that you are in more constant awareness of this. When I find a person to observe, their story slowly becomes more clear to me over time, gaps being filled — it really is amazing.

I usually went to grocery stores on weekends and looked around in people’s shopping carts. If I saw something that interested me, I decided to observe the person for a little bit. Of course, since my goal was to find someone to kill, I ruled out anyone who had children or a partner with them. Wedding rings were another tell-tale sign.

So maybe once a weekend, I would find someone who fit my criteria, at which point I would follow them home and note their address. From there, it became incredibly easy to investigate a little bit more; most people have normal work hours, meaning I could spend afternoons going through their mail or looking around in their house. I repeated this with several people (and had one close call), but for varying reasons I didn’t really feel satisfied enough with them to kill any of them.

I started getting a bit impatient and thought that I might just settle for killing the man named Devon, even though I didn’t really want to kill someone wealthy. But then, I came across someone new — someone who just, felt perfect. The feeling only strengthened as I investigated her further, and I knew that she would be the one for me to kill.

A young-looking woman I met at the grocery store, as per usual. She was doing some light shopping with a basket. Her hair was wavy and dark brown, sitting inelegantly on her slumped shoulders and surrounding her tired-looking face. Her bare fingers told me she might be single, but beyond that, my gut was almost certain of it. This woman just seemed so…plain, really. I guess I felt a greater acuity for the personal lives of strangers ever since I started my people-watching. But the way she carried herself, I just got the feeling that if she suddenly died, nobody would be around to miss her. Of course, I still wanted to investigate her a bit.

I followed my usual routine of checking out her place during her work hours. I learned immediately from her mail that her name is Linda Watson. Linda lived in a quiet apartment complex, her mailbox easily accessible right outside her door. Instead of quickly shuffling through it, I decided I could take her mail back to my dorm and return it before she was finished with work (she only lived about 15 minutes from me). I did some research and learned how to open and reseal the envelopes without damaging them, which took some technique along with a hair dryer, rubbing alcohol, and Q-tips.

This made it easy for me to learn a little more about her. Linda was a 33-year-old woman who worked for a small accounting firm — I’d rather not name the place outright. Her birthday was December 11th which, coincidentally, was approaching in a couple weeks. I also managed to find a bank statement that gave me a nice look into how she’s been spending her past month. It was at this point I realized that my assessment of Linda Watson as an extremely plain woman was pretty spot-on, because there was absolutely nothing interesting on the list. A trip to Old Navy, a bunch of Starbucks, something about $40 from Amazon — no restaurants, no movies, nothing that would really imply she was spending any time socializing. That aside, I also found a cooking magazine, so I guess she was into cooking.

Apartments are harder to break into than suburban homes, because there are fewer doors and windows. Every time I got Linda’s mail, I would check the front door and the windows in the back, but they were always locked. This was a bit frustrating because I was really interested in getting into her house. So, I came up with a sort of plan that I thought would be fun, even if it didn’t work.

Last Saturday, I visited Linda Watson’s apartment complex as I would on weekdays. The difference is that this time, I wanted her to be home. I thought it would be interesting to have a conversation with her. If I got lucky, I could take advantage of the situation to discreetly unlock a window from the inside. So, I walked up to her door wearing nothing warmer than a light sweatshirt, and knocked. The adrenaline rush was crazy. I was afraid I might screw something up.

The door opened, and in front of me stood Linda Watson, exactly as I remembered her from the grocery store. It was at that moment, making eye contact for the first time, that I realized I was running the risk of beginning to care about this person. As selfish as it is, I couldn’t kill a person I cared about, even if it’s a 33-year-old woman standing in a doorway with a slightly perplexed look on her face, giving me a reserved “Hello.”

Arms crossed from the cold, I shyly returned Linda’s greeting. I explained that I was walking my dog near the woodsy area behind the back of her apartment, and that he had gotten away. I had been looking for my dog for an hour and was wondering if Linda may have seen him roaming about. Of course, Linda sympathetically apologized for the situation and that she couldn’t be of use to me, but that she would keep an eye out. I wore a defeated expression in response, apologizing in return for troubling her.

It somehow went exactly as I had hoped — Linda invited me inside to warm up a bit with some coffee. I outwardly hesitated before accepting her offer, although on the inside I wanted to jump through the door and hug her for cooperating so well. And that’s how Linda Watson ended up with a 19-year-old girl next to her on the couch — who knows if it was just a nice gesture or if she really has no better way to spend her Saturdays than talking to some kid she just met (who happens to be interested in killing her).

Linda soon learned that my name is Maria (it’s not) and that I attend the nearby community college (I don’t). I was a little bit nervous that she would ask me too many questions because I didn’t have many answers prepared. I was able to steer the conversation toward her, and she was pretty happy to talk. I asked what she does, and she told me that she works for the accounting firm I already knew about, communicating with outside clients and keeping records. I told her I was pretty nervous about growing up. She told me to enjoy college and to make lots of friends because there’s less opportunity once you start working.

When I asked if she was married or anything, she laughed. Of course I knew she wasn’t married, but I wanted to hear more about her love life. She said that she doesn’t currently have a boyfriend (I guess she’s at least had boyfriends, but who knows how long ago). When I asked her about kids, she said she doesn’t want them until she gets a better job. On top of that, she told me that her family has a history of some genetic diseases such as arthritis and depression, which she is afraid to give to her kids.

It’s funny that she mentioned that because when I asked to use her bathroom, I noticed a tube of prescription pills on the sink. It was labelled duloxetine, which I looked up later and discovered that it is in fact an antidepressant. I had a joking thought that maybe by killing her I’d be doing her a favor, but quickly decided I was a terrible person for coming up with that.

The rest of the visit was pretty dull. We talked about food and some other mundane stuff before I eventually made an excuse to leave. I didn’t get the chance to unlock a window or anything like that, but I didn’t really feel the need to go through her apartment anymore. As early as the drive back to my dorm, I was already thinking about how I would best like to kill Linda Watson.

The choice was between effectiveness and fun. I decided to go with fun, because it would be way more satisfying to kind of dissect her as I killed her, rather than just getting it done and calling it a day. Fast-forward one week to December 13th — today, actually. Linda Watson turned 34 two days ago. I made a fun little wager with myself where if Linda was spending her birthday weekend alone, I would pay her a visit and kill her. If she was out or had company, I would stop by next week or something instead.

So this morning, I drove over to Lowe’s and bought an axe. Again, I expect you’re laughing, but that’s also kind of the point. An axe is so kind of cliche and a “movies” thing that I actually thought it would be the most fun. Swinging it at someone and everything, it’s a really entertaining image. They actually had a bunch of different axes, so I picked one that had a good weight but was still light enough for me to swing quickly.

The drive after getting the axe was when the adrenaline really picked up. All that kept going through my mind on the way over was “Wow, I’m really doing this.” Not in a bad way, just like a surprised this is real life sort of thing. I also got this strange rush of recollections of the time I spent with Linda. It was like my life was flashing before my eyes, except it was just the rather mundane hour I spent with Linda — like snippets of our conversations, the sound of her laugh, her facial expressions and stuff.

I also wondered to myself what the crazy serial killers would be feeling at a time like this — schizophrenic delusions? Sexual buildup? I have no idea, but what I felt was kind of like ridiculously alert and numb in the senses at the same time, however that’s possible.

Before getting out of the car, I had the sense to stuff the axe into my backpack to look a little less ridiculous walking across the parking lot. The handle was sticking out, but that didn’t really matter. At that point my heart was pounding so hard I could feel my throat throbbing. I tried controlling my breath, but it’s really hard to not breathe fast when your heart is pounding like that.

I reached Linda Watson’s door and quietly put my ear to it after setting down my backpack. I heard a voice that wasn’t hers — company? No, it was just the TV, mixed with her occasional tapping footsteps behind the door. I actually kept my ear there for a really freaking long time, because I wanted to make absolutely sure nobody was over. Probably 10 minutes of that and a lot of reassuring myself convinced me.

I quietly opened my backpack zipper and held the axe in my hands. My fiercely shaking hands. What the hell was this kind of reaction that my body was making? I told my body to shut up, that it’s no big deal, but of course it wouldn’t listen. It was actually bizarre how much my hands were shaking. It must be the adrenaline buildup. I rolled my eyes at myself and got my hand to rest on the doorknob. If it’s locked, I’ll knock, it’ll be basically the same. I took a deep breath and forced my muscles into action.

I swiftly turned the doorknob. Not locked. In one movement, I opened up the door and slipped inside. Linda Watson, just a few steps away into the kitchen. I see — she was in the middle of cooking. She immediately jumped and turned around, startled. I expected that. Quickly, I let go of the doorknob and adjusted the axe into both hands. In the following split second, I realized that she would probably start to make a lot of noise. Looking back, I’m an idiot for not considering that. Just as Linda’s mouth opened to speak — maybe even started speaking — I forcefully swung my axe into the side of her head.

But, my axe was facing backwards. I hit her with the blunt end of the blade. I actually did this on purpose, because in that split second I somehow decided that it would be the way to keep her noise to a minimum. It actually worked. I felt barely any resistance in the swing as I collided with her head, knocking it clean aside. Linda’s half-formed syllable came out as a kind of weird grunt — a noisy exhalation is probably the best I could describe it. That happened at the same time as her head smacked into the cabinet from the force, and she fell backwards without any ability to keep her balance. I didn’t hesitate at all to keep swinging at her while she was half lying down on the ground, this time my axe facing the right way. I didn’t really know where to swing, so I kind of just started hacking at her collarbone area and chest. It didn’t feel like the axe was going too deep, but there was a nice “thunk” sort of sound every time the axe embedded into her. I even felt the soft sinking sensation ripple into my hands, like the axe was a kind of physical extension of my sense of touch.

On a whim, I swung once at her throat, but most of the swing actually missed and I hit the floor by accident, causing a loud, dull whack to resonate through the apartment. I didn’t have time to think about it. I swung again with better aim and got a more centered hit, feeling the bone or cartilage or whatever is in there, so I must have split it open. Right after that, I decided to swing at her face, and I got this diagonal cut along her nose and mouth, which felt pretty good so I did it once more.

I finally briefly stopped to survey the damage. Linda was bleeding ridiculously. The blood was kind of coming out in waves, in sync with her beating heart, probably. It was pooling all around her and riding along the cracks between the tiles. Her light blue shirt was all torn up and stained dark, kind of mixed with a fleshy mess around her chest. It was all just glistening red. Her face wasn’t much better, covered in dripping red at this point, and her lip was kind of hanging off, revealing red-stained teeth in a really weird way, like a zombie or something.

Linda wasn’t dead, though. Her limbs were kind of weakly, aimlessly trying to move while she was stuck on her back. More than anything, she reminded me of a bug that you crush but it still pitifully moves its legs around before it dies completely. That’s basically what she was doing. But I didn’t know how long it would take for her to die, or what kind of condition she was in. I ended up grabbing a big knife that was on the counter that she was using to cut up meat. Trying to step around the blood, I reached down and carved into the upper half of her neck, trying to sort of saw it from the left side to the right. It was a little awkward because the area was so soft and squished around the knife as I was cutting. But the sensation was completely different from the axe. It actually felt like I was cutting a tough piece of raw meat (which I guess technically, I was).

The blood started pouring out, and I hoped that I severed the most major arteries in there. It must have worked, because after a moment Linda’s limb movements kind of just had the strength drained from them, soon resting still on the floor. I took a few seconds to catch my breath. No time to stick around and think about the experience. I shook the knife blade through a dirty pan in the sink to clean off the blood, then threw the knife into my backpack. I did the same with the axe. I also took her laptop that was sitting on the counter. It had some recipe open for veal and mushrooms. I didn’t really take the laptop to use it, since I have a perfectly good one myself that I got for college. I just wanted to look through it for fun.

I finally went outside and closed the door behind me. I got some blood on my sweater and jeans. But funnily enough, I actually anticipated that so I wore dark colors.

The drive back to my dorm was just a constant replaying of the experience in my head. I guess that’s still kind of happening even now, actually. But it felt pretty nice. Linda Watson is dead. I kind of let the weight of that sink in. The sensation of having completely removed a human life from existence. It’s crazy. I don’t know how else to describe it.

Anyway, I threw the axe and knife into a dumpster on campus, which I think is picked up every Monday, so they’ll be gone by then. My roommate goes home on the weekends, so I have the dorm to myself today. It gave me the chance to go through Linda’s website history. I was right in thinking that’s where her deepest secrets would lie.

There was actually a lot of dirty stuff, like the names of websites for porn videos and stories and things like that. Same with her searches. A lot of the websites were boring, like cooking websites and recipes, and game websites like Bejeweled and stuff. I eventually got to the “one week ago” section of her history, and it gave me a chill.

There were a whole bunch of searches like “methods of suicide”, “how to tie a noose”, “dangerous household chemicals”, “carbon monoxide poisoning” — like a lot of them. She was probably ready to write a book on suicide after all the research she did. So I guess Linda was contemplating suicide. I wonder if it was influenced by her depression.

The irony is actually striking. Maybe Linda was going to die anyway. Or maybe she couldn’t find the courage to do it. If that were the case, I almost literally gave her a birthday present by killing her. That’s actually really comical in a messed-up way, and it leaves a weird taste in my mouth. The part I don’t get is that I didn’t see any of those searches up until the “one week ago” section, nothing more recent than that.

I ended up throwing the laptop in the dumpster with the other stuff. It’s been a few hours since then, so I’ve had some time to calmly think about everything. Like I said, it was pretty satisfying and I’m glad I finally got around to it. I feel like I can finally cross it off my bucket list, or like I’m tying loose ends with myself. This is probably the first and last time I’ll write the name Linda Watson — it’s back to living a normal college life, except I might do some people-watching every now and then because it’s definitely fun and interesting.

But I’ll always wonder how many people there are like me. I’m sure there has to be a lot, because there is just nothing strange about it to me, being curious about killing someone. Sadly, it’s something that people can’t exactly just talk about, so I guess I’ll never know. I’m sure that anyone would just lie about it even if you asked them. But you can’t help but wonder if that person in the grocery store, who stares at you as you pass by, might be considering what it would be like to kill you. If I could, I would tell them all about it, so they could decide for themselves. But who knows, maybe I got lucky, and that person is you. I actually really, really hope so.

~♥