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besotted-eros · 3 years ago

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Visit from a Ghost

Eren x Fem!Reader

Content: Angst, smut, unprotected sex, oral (f! receiving), pining, overstim, dirty talk, slight blood, bruising, established relationship, canon compliant

A/N: so this is a companion piece to my obsessed! Eren headcanons and fic. References to manga spoilers, heavy on the angsty sex. Very self indulgent. Hope you enjoy!

When you saw the figure at your bedroom window, lounging upon the sill as though he was meant to be there, you drew your gun.

It was a small, angry thing, wrestled from the grasps of a Marleyan soldier and entrusted to you to help protect the queen. You had yet to use it, but levelled it naturally now, letting out a growled command for the shadowed being to raise his hands.

When you saw the figure turn from your bedroom window, lazily leaning his head back so his viridian gaze met yours, you dropped your gun.

It hit the floorboards with a metallic thud, and in a better context you would have held your breath, jumped away from the risk of a bullet discharging from the fall. But you were motionless, staring at the apparition in front of you. That was what he felt like. A ghost, conjured from beyond the veil.

"Eren." You said it like one calls to the dead, your voice shaky and unconfident. But brimming, with hope. With fear.

"I come all this way to see you, and your first reaction is to shoot me?" He murmured, his rich voice creeping through the dark to find the holes in your heart.

Moth bitten, hung up in a closet and forgotten, you had lost the memory of the pain and euphoria that Eren brought you. But you could feel it now, searing your chest.

"You deserve worse. Months. It's been months." The words tumbled from your throat as you fought the urge to cry. "I didn't know where you were. For months. And they won't tell me what what happened, no one will." You felt like a child, choking on your words as your hands bunched into fists. The only thing you knew is that you were meant to raise the alarm as soon as you saw him. But you couldn't. Not for him. You wanted to fall to your knees, to see how he'd rush across the room to gather you in his arms.

"You don't want me to answer that truthfully." He moved from the windowsill, feet silently hitting the ground as he faced you completely.

You didn't recognize him. Those were the eyes of your lover, those the lips you kissed, the brow you rested yours upon. The man who was once the boy you slept beside, you fought beside, you grew beside. The face you had seen overcome with passion, with pain and glory. But he was stoic, as grey as the three walls. You had felt him slipping before Marley, but now?

Even though he was in the same room, breathing your air, he felt gone.

"I do. I know you're the one who pushed me onto this duty, you made Hisu call for me, and for what? To keep me stupid and ignorant?" You spat the words at his feet, and it made him bristle.

"To protect you, why else? This stupid farm house is the safest place on the island. Safer than any of the walls, or the inner castle, or-"

"Safer than with you?"

That touched him. The repetition of his vow, that as long as you were by his side you would come to no harm. That he would hold you with his heart and protect you with his life. As long as you stayed within reach of him.

"Yes. Safer than with me. So much safer." He didn't want that to be true. He wanted to be where you belonged.

But he needed to make the world safe for you.

"I needed to make sure you were taken care of, that I could do the things I was meant to do without risking you." He crossed his arms in front of his body, and the tone of his voice bordered on petulant. But despite his stoic face, you could tell he was nervous. The clench of his jaw, how his eyes looked past you instead of at you. This wasn't a man who had forgone emotions. Just a mask.

Maybe that was your Eren after all.

"I know you hate me-"

"I don't hate you." You cut him off sharply, reaching up to touch the pendant at your throat. It was a piece of sea glass, tumbled by the waves to the colour of his eyes. You had picked it up on a beach patrol, and told him how it matched him perfectly. He had stolen it out of your pocket that night and fashioned a cage with stolen wire. The next morning it hung from the leather cord his father's key once did, and found its permanent home upon your neck.

He told you it was his eye and his heart, and to keep watch over it as he kept watch over you.

He had been so gentle. You remembered how the sea breeze rustled the hair, grown to the nape of his neck, how he had given you a smile that had become so rare. He had known then that the boat would be returning without him.

"I don't hate you even if I want to. I never could. I... I miss you." The dam in your throat broke as you hiccuped a single sob. And the dam in his face broke, eyebrows upturned with remorse.

He had made you cry.

"No, no, no." He murmured, crossing the floor to take you in his arms. He was taller, his body somehow even more wiry than when he had left. Toughened by hardship. But the way his fingers curled around the back of your head, the way his arm wrapped around your waist. That was how he held you. How he always had. The familiarity made you weak, and you clung to him desperately, fists mangling the fabric of his shirt as you buried your face against him.

"Y/n." He said it through gritted teeth, and then repeated it. And then again.

You thought back to every time you had embraced after being apart. The sound of his feet pounding the stone of Wall Maria to throw his arms around you, his cries of your name loud enough to send birds flying. How he had whispered your name when you saw him after Shiganshina, his face buried in the crook of your neck and the weight of the world suddenly so much more heavy upon his shoulders.

"Eren." You reached up, taking his face delicately in your hands. His malachite gaze was wide, wild with desperation and hurt. "What happened to you, 'ren?" You asked, and his eyes shut tightly. "What did you do?"

"Please. Don't ask me. I'll answer to God, but I can't answer to you."

You could have pressed. He would have given up, at least... The Eren who loved you a lifetime ago would have. But the darkness in his mouth when he pressed his lips to your forehead convinced you not to.

He had followed you so diligently when you were young. Seeking the peace he had somehow found in you. And as you pulled him towards your lips, you knew it was that same comfort he was searching for. Peace, amongst his life of nothing but war. So you kissed serenity onto his lips, knowing that this may be the last taste of it he would ever have.

He groaned softly against your mouth, still for a moment before pressing into the touch. His fingers were gentle as they brought you closer, and closer still. Tugging at your hips, your shoulders, your hair, coiling around your neck. He was rediscovering you, reminding himself of the map of your body. It was like he was finding his way home again.

"I missed you. I thought about you, so much." He exhaled over your lips, and you tried to keep the welling of your tears from spilling over again. You had needed that. Needed to know that he still breathed for you. "Even when it hurt. I thought about you."

"I thought about you too." You whispered, stroking your hands through his silken hair. "I hoped... I didn't think it was smart, but I hoped. You would come to me."

Your hands traversed his chest and back, running down his shoulders and muscular arms. You grabbed his wrists, feeling the bump of your hair tie still upon it. He lifted for you to see, and you pressed a kiss to his hot skin, unable to hold back the tears anymore. You watered his skin with them.

"See? I kept you with me. Always." his mouth was against your forehead, tendons in his wrist flexing. "I lost a lot of myself. But I never lost you."

You let out a choked whimper and he pressed his cheek to yours, murmuring your name softly. Finally your knees gave out, but his arms were vices around your waist, holding you as you leaned against him. But he came down with you, kneeling with you in the puddle of moonlight. It painted him white and black, his shadows so much deeper but where it graced him, he glowed.

"I'm sorry." You sighed into his shoulder, all but pawing at his back. "I just... Am I dreaming, Eren? Are you going to be gone when my eyes open in the morning?"

He didn't answer for a moment, face buried in your hair. "I'm real. This is real. I promise."

"Prove it." You whispered, turning your mouth to his ear like a bloom to sun. "I've had this nightmare, every night since you've left. Prove this isn't one."

His fingers curled around your upper arms as his eyes bore into yours. They were shadowed, haunted by things you knew you'd never know. "Tell me how. I'll do anything for you."

Almost, you wanted to correct him. He'd do almost anything for you.

"Love me."

"I do." He murmured, voice strained as he moved to cup your face, his thumb stroking across your lips. You parted them, inviting his digit to press against your tongue. His eyes widened slightly, and you saw something spark. It encouraged you to wrap your lips around him, suckling at his first knuckle. You let it pop from your mouth, dragging your tongue from his palm to the pad.

"Show me. Show me the way only you can." You spoke softly against his skin, and he let out a soft groan, from deep deep within his chest.

"Only me?" He whispered hoarsely, hands squeezing the sides of your face. You nodded as best as you could. "You haven't touched another since I've been gone?"

"Of course not. Since that first night, since that first kiss..." You gripped his wrists tightly, voice thick with emotions you couldn't name. "It's only been you, forever just you."

He kissed you like he wanted to consume you. Open mouthed, hot breath, all teeth and clawing fingers. You fell into him, letting him pull you up and push you towards your bed. You fell backwards, welcoming the soft mattress against your back. A stark contrast to his body, all hard lines and firm hands.

Eren's heat was enough to melt you. You didn't realise you had been so cold. Your legs wrapped around him, pulling his warmth further against your core. He grunted softly against your mouth, jutting his hips forward so you could feel how you made him.

Your lips trailed from his, kissing along the sharp line of his jaw, up to his ear. You didn't need to say anything into it, just your breath made him wild. He tore at your shirt, sending buttons flying across the room as the moonlight met your skin. In response you pulled at his, unhooking your legs to push at his pants. You wanted skin, you wanted bare vulnerable touch. You wanted to see the parts of him he kept hidden.

He never scarred. Your hands traced the unmarred landscape of his torso as he flexed underneath you. No matter what horrors his body faced, it would never leave a lasting impression on him. The titan in him assured that.

You wondered if it was the same for love, as your teeth pricked at his skin, making him shiver. You marked him, delicate and light. In the sun it would look like stepping stones, tracing the path of a lovers touch. If it would even last till morning.

But you loved him anyway, even if it was temporary.

"So beautiful." His voice was guttural, hands cupping your breasts after yanking your bra down. Your nipples didn't have time to harden under his thumb before his mouth was upon them, suckling gently. You gripped his chestnut hair in response, letting out a soft whine of pleasure that encouraged him to suck harder. He switched sides, leaving the cold air to caress the wetness at your precipice.

"I can hear your heartbeat" he murmured, pausing for a moment to press himself against your flesh. "It's so fast."

Your nails traced vows on the back of his neck, down his back as far as you could reach. "You make me like this." You whispered, and his teeth sunk into your skin, making your back arch. "You scare me. You turn me on. You make my head dizzy and my st-stomach fill with butterflies." He stripped you as you spoke, pushing down the soft fabric of your pants, then the cotton of your panties. You felt the kiss of the cold night air for a moment, drifting through the window. And then his fingers were upon you, slowly stroking along your aching entrance and your slick lips.

"I make you wet." He murmured against your skin, and you flushed, nodding.

"Yes, you do." You responded, moving your hips along his hand, encouraging him. He obliged happily, digits wet with your desire now sliding into your hole. You had been so long neglected, not feeling the desire to even touch yourself without him there to see. He could feel your tightness, how you gripped his fingers.

"My sweetheart," he purred, lifting his face to gaze up at you. His eyes were heavy lidded, almost hiding the jade irises that haunted your dreams. "You're so tight, spread your legs." You obeyed him as easily as breathing, opening your legs as he began to kiss his way further down. You whined again, and his fingers gripped your thighs, forcefully enough to close them slightly.

"The fucking noises you make..." He hissed, breath hot against your pussy. He dragged a tongue from the bottom, to the very top, glancing off of your clit in a way that made you cry out. "I want you to keep quiet so we don't get caught but..." Another languid lick, another lewd gasp. "I want to make you scream too."

Your hand came down hard on the back of his head, gripping his hair tightly. He groaned against you, sending vibrations through you. You didn't mean to be hard, to have tugged so roughly. But Eren loved it, eyes glinting as he sank his tongue into you, letting your plush walls envelope the muscle eagerly. Each time your hand twitched, responding to the waves of pleasure he drew from you, you'd pull more. And it would drive him forward, tongue sliding across your lips desperately, lips closing around your clit to suckle at it.

Your body was uncontrollable, hips lifting from the bed and chest heaving. At points it felt like he was drinking from you, loud slurps as he thumbed your clit. The movement repeated, becoming faster and faster. The pleasure mounted, a knot tightened where his tongue touched you.

"Do it." He purred against you, feeling how your legs trembled and thighs touched his ears. He knew you, knew what every jerk of your body meant. "On my tongue, want to taste you."

That was what made the bud burst, your hips rocking desperately against him as your pussy fluttered, overcome with its first orgasm in months. It coursed through you, and you felt the bed wet with your love.

Your toes curled with pleasure and you moved onto your elbows, staring down at him.

"Eren," you whimpered, and his eyes opened once more. From your vantage point you could see how his hips moved, thrusting slowly against the mattress. He was as desperate for you as you were for him."Eren I need you. I need you so bad." With a final pop of your clit, one that made you gasp, he pulled back and straightened up. His cock bobbed as he looked at you, eyes filled with a dangerous mixture of love and lust. He was dripping, your wetness from his chin and his pre-cum from his mushroom head.

"How badly?"

You brought your legs to your chest slowly, and his eyes dropped from your face to your heat. Your hole closed around emptiness, so desperate to be filled. "More than anything."

His fist closed around his shaft, stroking slightly as he stared at you with a slack jaw, face softened with awe. He always looked at you as though you hung the moon. As if you were responsible for everything soft and wonderful in the world. You watched as he touched himself and his mouth twisted into a grin.

"Did this..." He whispered, his hand moving faster, the noises filling the room. They were hot, lewd. The hot slick of his skin, your moans rising to meet it. "Did this when I thought of you."

The thought of him, so far away from you, deep in trouble but still overcome by his want, the aching need of you. It was enough to make you gush visibly, and Eren moaned at the sight. Before you had the chance to beg again he was at your entrance, hands pushing on the backs of your thighs. You pulled at him, bringing him to your lips so you could kiss your moans into his mouth.

Because the moment he started pushing, moan you did. Loud and desperate, feeling how he spread you. How he made you stretch to fit him like a glove.

He was mumbling in your ear, alternating between sweet calls of your name and darkened swears. Your nails dragged down his back, digging into his smooth skin and making steam rise. His hips were slow, but only for a moment. The need took over quickly, and you bucked to meet him as best as you could. But he was long, long enough to make you start each time he bottomed out in you.

"Eren, Eren, Eren," you whispered into the dark, each iteration becoming more and more sloppy. He grabbed your face, pulling himself up so he could stare at you. Sweat beaded on his elegant forehead, his long hair slicked back. But his eyes glowed in the lowlight, focusing on your face as though nothing but you existed.

He pounded you in time with your chants, each drill concentrated on getting as much of himself into you as he could. He filled your needy hole like he filled your heart. Wholly, fully. Enough to make your eyes well with tears.

He caught one that trickled down the side of your face, lapping it up with his long tongue. You gasped for air, twisting his hair in your fingers as legs wrapped around him desperately. You wanted to stay like this, stay connected to him forever. His hands traversed you, finding the places he had made home. The curve of your waist, the precipice of your hips, the valley under your ass as he pulled you up further, hitting you now at an angle that dragged across the nub on your inner wall.

And then he lifted you, pulling back to sit on his heels and to suspend you in his arms. You grasped his face as you looked down at him, your hair falling like a curtain. Hiding him from the world, the world that would take him from you. He was beautiful. All wild eyes, soft pouting lips. His fine features were shadowed, his expression twisted with pleasure. You kissed him, once. Twice. Three times. Each time deeper.

Stay here.

You wanted to say as he began to bounce you, sliding you upon his length, fingers digging into the soft plush of your ass.

Stay here, we can be okay.

His mouth was hot on your neck and shoulders, leaving bruises that you worried would outlast him.

Stay here, I can love you safe here.

But all that came out of your mouth was a keening moan, your walls fluttering as you came like a river, washing over him. Your head was thrown back in ecstasy, the wave of euphoria making you tremble and making him growl. He bite your shoulder, drawing soft droplets of blood, and you felt his hips stutter, and the telltale wetness that heralded his own cum. Filling you, as it should. He moaned, vulnerable and wanton into your shoulder.

"That's fucking it, baby. Cream on my cock." He cooed, his pace unrelenting as he fucked you through both of your orgasms. You were relieved when he let you fall back onto the bed, eyes opening to pull in for a kiss.

But he didn't stop.

"Er-eren..." You whimpered, and he kissed you hard, enough to bruise the pulp of your lip.

"Hold on... Hold on to me..." He whispered, teeth dragging across your sensitive flesh. You obliged, throwing your arms around his neck, legs circling him and pulling him in to the hilt. He pulled back, snapping in quickly, his pace sloppy and hurried.

"Need more...need more of you and I..." A gasp, a throb from deep within you. "need to give you all of me."

You were seeing stars. Bursting across your vision like supernovas. Though your limbs clung to him, the pleasure grew almost unbearable. A burning fire twisting between your legs, making you jerk and throb. It's like you could feel him in ways you never could.

The drip of his sweat, watering the forgotten lands of your body. The way his skin soothed yours, healing empty wounds. How his hair shifted, a lock falling to caress your cheek.

And his heartbeat. You felt it. Inside you, beating as though it was your own. The sensation drove you wild, clawing at his shoulders and yanking at his ochre locks.

"Gonna- it's gonna..." You whimpered, unable to form coherence. He drove into you faster, nodding against you. You were reduced to a babbling mess, eyes rolled back, mouth slack.

"Yeah, yeah baby yeah me too. Gonna cum in you again. Take it, take me. Take it all." He said, his voice thick with lust as he clawed into you, the slam of his hips hitting you in the most unimaginable of ways. He reared back suddenly, gripping your face hard enough to hurt as he placed his brow to yours.

"I love you." He whispered.

"I love you too." You replied, and with that you were both over the cliff, bodies shaking with pleasure. He filled you, his hot cum spurting from the slight space between you. His hand slammed against the head board, chest heaving, hips stuttering. But his eyes never left yours, gaze glazed with pleasure. His weight collapsed against you, and you cradled him, murmuring as his lips pressed to yours.

"Say it again." He demanded, hand moving to cup your cheek. "Say you love me."

"I love you." You turned your head to kiss his palm. "I love you, Eren. I love you."

He let out a soft sound, resting his mouth against your cheek. "More." He demanded, rolling over now and pulling you with him. His arms caged you, in a way that made you never want to be free. "I want a lifetimes worth."

"I'll give you a few months." You muttered, and could feel him smile against the top of your head. You wondered when was the last time he did that. When would be the next. "Just to catch you up." His hands stroked through your hair, teasing knots from it. You laid your ear flat to his toned chest. "You'll have to get the rest next time." His hand faltered and then tightened, pushing you into him. You could hear his heart pick up speed.

"Y/n-"

"Don't." You interrupted him. It was sharper than you intended, but you thought you had the right to it. "Don't say a word."

He went silent, resuming his grooming of your locks.

"Tell me we'll see each other again. Even if it's for a moment. Just once more. I don't want this to be it." His hands flattened on your back as he held you.

"I promise." He murmured. "We'll see each other again. But by then you'll hate me."

You didn't argue. Somehow you knew.

"For now, I love you." You pulled yourself to him, kissing his mouth with sweetness. You whispered it, over and over. Like a promise. Like a prayer. You said until your voice was hoarse, curled up on your side as his body surrounded you. You fell asleep with it on your tongue.

And you woke up to an empty bed.

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mvalentine · 4 years ago

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Favourite Fanfiction Tropes

thanks for the tag @colossalpainintheass @beckaroo & @this-person-is-busy love you all 💘

Slow Burn or Love At First Sight: slow freaking burn baby. i really don’t like when couples fall in love at first sight cause honestly, i believe in lust at first sight not love at first sight lmao (just because the image you had of them in your head turned out to be right doesn’t mean it was LOVE at first sight) and also- slow! burn! the beginning sparks, the tension, the denial, the build up & finally BOOM! now kiss!

Fake Dating or Secret Dating: oooo i actually had to think long & hard about this one. as much as i love the angst potential about a couple having to hide their relationship for whatever reason, i somewhat like the idea of two unknowing fools going into something oh so casually until they suddenly realize - oh shit! oh no no no no what is happening! what are these feelings i’m feeling oh lord come & save me.

Enemies To Lovers or Best Friends to Lovers: enemies to lovers all day. as much as i love a good cutesy best friends to lovers tale the deliciousness of enemies to lovers is just too.damn.good. i could. literally sit here & write a whole damn essay about why enemies to lovers is so scrumptious but instead i’m gonna focus my energy on writing an enemies to lovers (more like enemies to f**k buddies but ok) fic you know the one ;) @beckaroo

There’s Only One Bed or Long Distance Correspondence: ‘i’ll take the couch.’ ‘oh no, its ok i’ll take the couch.’ ‘no, no, please i insist.’ ‘alright then only if you’re sure.’ & then somehow the two end up in the same goddamn bed the next morning. what’s not to love?

Hurt/Comfort or Amnesia: listen. anyone who knows me KNOWS i am the biggest, BIGGEST whore for hurt & comfort. that shit is like crack for me baby i am addicted & i ain’t even sorry about it.

Fantasy AU or Royalty AU: fantasy just because there’s SO much that can be explored, the possibilities are endless. the royalty au is kinda limited & tbh can get boring pretty quickly with the same repetitive tropes (king/queen falls in love with a local forbidden person, king & queen marry solely for political reasons etc etc).

Mutual Pining or Domestic Bliss: mutual! pining! two dumbasses being absolutely enamoured by one another but too scared to act on it lest the feelings aren’t reciprocated? then realising the feelings ARE reciprocated and omg omg this is really happening!!! again, what’s not to love?

Smut or Fluff: ok i actually do enjoy a good fluff piece but SMUT because i’m an absolute whore but also, why not smut with fluff?? because people saying ‘i love you’s during sex? that’s my jam baby lather it on some bread & LET’S GO.

Canon Compliant or Canon Divergence: i picked both because i kind of like a balance? i don’t want it to be fully removed from canon (although if it’s well written i’ll 1000% read it) but i also love when writers add on to, expand or chance certain things from canon. i mean that’s pretty much headcanons are made & i absolutely love headcanons.

Reincarnation or Major Character Death: oh my god it hurts so bad but... i live for the angst. the absolute pain. the hopeless despair. just delicious. but also, not a huge fan of the reincarnation trope lol once you’re dead stay dead sksksjjsks

One Shot or Multi-Chapter: i actually really like both, it truly depends on the writer & how they write it. i just picked one shot cause i suck at reading series, i always fall behind & then the chapters just keep on coming & i can sometimes get overwhelmed but that’s on me lmao.

Kid Fic or Pregnancy Fic: kid cause, i mean kids are cute sometimes i guess hdjsjs also i don’t know just not a huge fan of the pregnancy trope ALTHOUGH i do like the idea of a doting husband/wife running to the supermarket at 3am to provide for their pregnant partners cravings & the store owner already knows them cause they literally come in there every. single. day.

Arranged Marriage or Accidental Marriage: for some reason the idea of arranged marriage just weirds me out (although i know that there are tons of arranged marriages that have been successful i just personally like the idea) so i’m going with accidental marriage. but also!! fhshsjsj can you imagine a drunk ass couple waking up in vegas the next morning with a raging hangover & realising...wtf did we...did we...get married?!?!

High School Romances or Aged Up Romances: i’d rather read about older romances than read about the love lives of 15 year olds hahaha.

Time Travel or Isolated Together: the domesticity potential? perfect. the angst potential after being stuck with the same person for ages? also perfect.

Neighbours or Roommates: ‘...and they were roommates.’ enough said.

Sci-Fi or Magic AU: magic just cause magic is cool lmao i don’t know kghshs.

Angst or Crack: ANGST ANSGT ANGST. ok so my favourite is angst with a happy ending but oh my god give me a huge slice of angst over crack anyday.

Apocalyptic or Mundane: i picked both cause i want it to have some elements of the apocalyptic genre but don’t want it to be completely removed from reality. kind of like an intermingling of the two worlds i guess?!

Linear Storyline or Nonlinear Storyline: both cause again, it depends on the writer and the way they write it. non-linear is hard to write but i feel like if the writer is good, it can be really great because the back & forth with the flashbacks & the slowly connecting the dots & piecing the puzzle can be so so good.

Holiday Fic or Birthday Fic: ahhh i just love the idea of a partner planning a whole birthday surprise for their partner & tailoring it to their partner & it just shows how well they know them & its so so cute ugh i am a sucker for birthday fics!

Love Triangle or Miscommunication: love triangles HURT ( @agentrebecca i’m gonna play it some day but boy oh boy it’s gonna HURT like a bitch ugh) so i’m going with miscommunication plus i love love love the crash where the all the miscommunication & issues just come to a head and a massive fight happens and all hell breaks loose lmao.

tagging : @anotherbeingsworld @openheartthot @nateissewell @nazario-sayeed @cryinginthebackseat @starrystarrytrouble @utterlyinevitable @terrm9 & anyone else who wants to do it!

#writing

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sp4c3-0ddity · 6 years ago

Note

Oh!! If youre still doing the au thing, neighbors plance au? Everything is still canon compliant but pidge and lance have known each other since they were in diapers (imagine The Angst when pidge disappears after Kerberos and reappears at the garrison and lance has to lie to hunk about “pidge gunderson”)

possibly not quite what you wanted and a bit more than five headcanons (a fic of nearly 3000 words…) but i hope you like it!! sorry it’s a bit of a mess

(also i made up some stuff about the Garrison and the timeline may be a little off)

“Whothe heck is Pidge Gunderson?”

Predictably Hunk shrugs, as baffled asLance is…thoughlikely not as disappointed. He hopedhis comm specialist would be any of the last five girls he had a crush on, andyet—

“Righthere.”

The familiar voice squeezes his chest andmakes it difficult to breathe for a second, but when he recovers - no way, it can’t be her- he spins on his heel to face his and Hunk’s new teammate.

But the round face and petite frame areunmistakable despite the uneven haircut and glasses. Lance doesn’tknow who Pidge Gunderson is, but it’s not the girlstanding before him.

Katie Holt.

***

Lance lay on his side glaring at theGarrison recruitment poster tacked to his wall, well-aware that he was sulkingbut unwilling to do anything about it. He deservedto sulk after Commander Iverson released their class ranking andclassification. Dreams shattered, hopes dashed, his future as a hero andprodigious heartthrob flushed down the toilet and piped all the way to thebottom of the Marianas Trench for the moray eels to make snacks of…

Score: 82.15Ranking: #11Pilot Class: Cargo

The kicker was that his score was a fraction of a point lower than thelowest ranked fighter pilot.

“Thinkof it this way!” Veronica had saidin that peppy voice she took on when he sulked.“You’re top of the cargoclass!”

“Bigwhoop,” Lance had grumbled. “Cargo pilots don’t go on explorationmissions like to Kerberos…”

No, missions like that would be reserved for Keith and James and all the rest at thetop of his year, while he’d be stuck at the bottom of a barreldelivering instant meals to colonies on the moon.

A sharp knock sounded from the door.

“Whatdo you want?” Lance called without turning around. “I’m doing homework!”

The door’s hinges creaked. “That’s a lie.”

He bolted upright, his heart, heavy withdisappointment, lightening when Katie peeked around the door. “Katie!What’re you doing here?” Lance wondered.

She walked in, shutting the door behind her(which his mother wouldn’t be too happy about for some reason…itwas just Katie, their neighborand his friend since forever) and perching on his desk chair. “Iheard from Veronica that you didn’t make fighter class,” she said, scuffing herbare feet against the carpet. “I’m sorry; I know how much you wanted it.”

Lance sat up and waved a hand. “It’snot a big deal,” he said without meeting her eyes. “I mean, at least I made something, right? And if someone in fighter classwashes out I’llbe the first one in line to replace them!”

Katie raised an eyebrow at him, theslightest smirk perking up her lips. “You know that almost never happens, right?”

He slumped, heart weighed down all overagain, and admitted, “Right, well, a guy can hope! Oryou can make it, shoot through the ranks, and change the rules so that the top eleven make fighter class?”He winked at her, oddly pleased when a hint of pink colored her cheeks.

But she rolled his eyes and retorted, “Itdoesn’t really work that way, Lance, and by then it’ll be too late for you.”

“Iknow, I know.” Lance leaned back against his headboard, hands behind his headand ankles folded in front of him. “You couldjust keep some other sorry rank eleven pilot cadet from suffering this samegrave injustice.”

Katie snorted. “You’reso dramatic, Lance.” The bed sank underneath him as she sat beside him andpulled her feet up. “I can tell you’re upset though.”

“Who?Me? Upset that I didn’t get the thing I wanted most in the whole dang universe?Obviously not!”

Katie shot him a flat, unimpressed frown. “Atleast you still get to fly,” she pointed out. “You did reasonably well inflight school, so it’s not like you’ll lack for missions later, even if they’renot glamourous.”

“Easyfor you to say,” Lance mumbled. He covered his face with his arm. “Your dad andbrother are on the mission of a century.”

“Neitherof them is a pilot,” Katie pointed out.

“I’mnot a multi-talented genius like you,” he said, peeking at her from under hisarm. “You can easily get in as a comm specialist or an engineer withoutfinishing school. You can probably get in as a pilot too if you did flightschool first!”

Katie shifted in place, looking suddenlyuncomfortable judging by how she glanced away, and Lance decided to drop thetopic.

“Whatabout you? Going to join me at the Garrison soon?” He grinned, quirking ateasing eyebrow. “Sure, you have to get through at least two years of highschool first, but that’s exciting too, right?”

Katie stuck her tongue out and said, “Please,if I have to suffer more than two years of incompetent teachers and meanclassmates I’ll steal a rocket from the Garrison and launch myself to Kerberoswithout a helmet.”

Lance laughed, but when Katie didn’tjoin in his eyes widened. “That bad?”

She shrugged but rested her chin on herknees, staring at the same spot on his wall that preoccupied him before shearrived. “It’snot a big deal,” she said. “I know there’s an end to it, so I can live with itfor now.”

“Don’tworry,” Lance said. He sat up and slid forward, feet touching the floor, torest a hand on her shoulder. “The Garrison’s better.”

“Easyfor you to say,” Katie said. “You make friends easily and aren’t super smart—”

“Iresent that!” he squawked, hand springing to his chest in offense.

“—soyou fit in.” She smiled apologetically and added, “Sorry, I meant that as anobservation, not an insult.”

“Iknow.” A grin pushed at his lips, and he flicked a strand of her long hair thatfell into her face, unsecured by her ponytail. “But lots of people are supersmart at the Garrison, so you’ll fit right in!”

Probably better than me, he thought with a twinge in his gut.Everyone at the Garrison was just so spectacular…

“Speakingof super smart people,” Lance said, “you heard anything from your dad andbrother lately?” He waggled his eyebrows suggestively and added, “I know youtalk to them behind the Garrison’s back…”

Katie’s eyes widened in surprise. She grabbedthe front of his shirt, shocking himinto yelping and his heart - did her face have to be so close? - into racing, and said, “No one’s supposed to know about that!”

Lance raised his hands and stuttered, “Sorry!You’re just not careful around me!”

Katie frowned but let him go. “Don’ttell anyone,” she said.

“Hey,your secret is safe with me,” Lance promised. He straightened his shirt andsighed in relief. “So…is that a yes?”

Katie beamed, the expression radiant andwarming him. “Actually,they’re only a few days away from Kerberos…”

***

“Pidge”avoids Lance just like Katie did after the mission failure, but unlike thattime, when her red-eyed mother answered the door with an apology or the pebbleshe lobbed at her bedroom window went unacknowledged, the truth of it stares himin the face.

So he chooses to confront her.

When she opens the door to her dorm, hesticks his foot in the gap before she can slam it back in his face.

“Ow,”he hisses, the shock of it shooting through his foot and forcing a wince fromhim.

“Whatdo you want?” Katie - Pidge? Isn’t that the nickname her brother gave her? -demands. “I’m busy.”

He refuses to budge, despite his stomachdoing somersaults and his heart pounding an uneven rhythm against his ribs. “Ineed to talk to you.”

“Ihave nothing to say to you outside of class,” she retorts tartly.

His chest tightens, but he scowls andinsists, “You’veavoided me for the last few months, Pidge,so I think I at least deserve an explanation.”

Her eyes widen - no longer hidden behindthose big lenses - while a flicker of shame crosses her face before she sighsand opens the door. “Fine,” she says, waving him in. “Let’s make this quick; I havework to do.”

“Work?”Lance snorts, accepting her reluctant invitation. “It’s the second day of thesemester!”

“Ihave more important stuff to do than classwork, Lance,” she grumbles.

Before he can ask what she means, she slamsthe door shut with enough force to rattle the window.

Clothes and books and manuals litter herfloor, a sharp contrast from her relatively tidy childhood bedroom, but despitethe fact that she seems to have made herself quite at home, nothing gives awayanything…personal. No stuffed animals propped against apillow on the bed, no photos of her family pinned to the wall or sitting inframes on her cluttered desk, no stickers or posters or comic books lining thelittle free space on the shelves….

The sight of it makes his chest ache withsomething like regret.

She - really, what should Lance call her? - stands in the middle of the almost hiddenfloor with her arms crossed and her glower fixed at some point past him. “Sowhat do you want?”

“Totalk,” he says, the adrenaline that sustained him up to this point fading as hurt took over. “Why did you ghostme, Katie?”

“Don’tcall me that here,” she snaps, a hint of fear crossing her face so quickly hemight’ve imagined it.

So that answers one question…

“Allright, Pidge,” Lance says through gritted teeth, “whyhaven’t I seen you in months?”

“I’vebeen busy.”

“Busygetting into the Garrison under a fake name?” He mirrors her pose, adding aneyebrow raised in skepticism. “You’d get accepted here as yourself with youreyes closed.”

“I’mnot here for academicreasons,”Pidge says. “I’m here for—look, it doesn’t matter toyou! I’ll be out of your hair soon enough anyway.”

And as much as it pained Lance when sheignored him every time he tried - and failed- to visit her after her father and brother were declared dead, as much as it hurt for her to attempt to blow him offnow, he really didn’tlike the sound of that.

A frown pulls at his lips. “Whatdo you mean?” he wonders.

“I’m…tryingto switch to a different team,” she admits. And she even has the audacity tolook abashed, her eyebrows drawn together and herfingers wringing the hem of her uniform jacket.

But her admission doesn’thurt like it should, not when his chest burns with anger and he snaps, “I don’tknow what you’re up to - and I sure hope you’ll tell me! - but I would never expose you when you’reobviously in disguise.” He rolls his eyes, scowling at the floor, and mutters, “Icovered for you with Hunk already. He sensedsomething odd when I ‘met’ you.”

Of course he had, when the sight of Pidgeand her big brown eyes made his breath catch and his tongue stick to the roofof his mouth and left him speechless.

Really, all his primary school teachersthat bemoaned how talkative he was inclass should’veemployed Pidge disguised as a boy if they wanted him to keep quiet.

“Hedid?” Pidge’s jaw drops. “A-and it’s not that I think you’ll report me,” shecontinues after clearing her throat. “It’s that…I can’t risk being exposed fromsomething so trivial as I’m too friendlytowards someone I just met. Your sister would catch on in a—”

“I’msorry,” Lance interrupts, rolling his eyes, “but that’s the dumbest thing I’veever heard. And look, I knowyou’renot used to making friends”—he doesn’t miss her grimace at the reminder—”but lots of people are really friendly with peoplethey just met, so don’t give me that excuse.”

“I—”Pidge sighs, gaze drifting down to the floor between them. “I just…I don’tknow.”

Lance, suddenly exhausted with all thisincluding the months of her avoiding him, drops onto her bed. “Whyare you going to all this trouble anyway? Your dad works - I mean, worked - here, so can’tyou just…waltz in if you wanted?”

Pidge shakes her head and confesses, “Igot banned from the premises.”

His head snaps up in shock. “Wait,what?”

She sits heavily beside him. “IfI tell you…”

“You’llhave to kill me?” Lance suggests when she trails off, staring into space.

She smiles fleetingly, but he counts it avictory anyway. “No,but you can’t tell anyone else.”

He draws an X over his chest and says, “Crossmy heart. As long as I don’t have to die for this secret…”

“Youcan’t even tell Hunk,” Pidge insists with a glare.

He raises his hands. “I’malready way ahead of you in that…but it’ll get harder,” he says, rubbing theback of his neck sheepishly.

Her eyes flit from his face to the floorand back again. “Itwasn’t pilot error,” she almost whispers.

He leans closer, unsure he heard her right.“What?”

A familiar ferocity enters her eyes,sending a shiver up his spine, as she says, “The pilot didn’t crash and my father andbrother aren’t dead. Something tookthem.”

Lance gapes at her. “Areyou…really? How do you know?”

“ClassifiedGarrison footage I wasn’t supposed to find,” she tells him shortly. “They’relying about what happened.”

“W-whatcould’ve taken them?” he wonders while dread ties his stomach into knots. Buthe forces a laugh and feebly jokes, “N-not aliens, right?” When Pidge doesn’treply, his jaw drops. “Pidge, what did you see?”

“Isaw enough to know there’s more to what the Garrison said publicly,” shepronounces, “but I’m here to find out as much as I can.”

“Anddo what?” Lance asks. “Expose the Garrison’s lie?”

“Maybe,”she says, frowning. “It…depends on what I find.”

“But,Pidge—”

And before he can wonder what she plans todo next, she cuts in, “I’msorry, Lance.”

At this rate, he’llhave a premature heart attack thanks to all the shocksshe’sdealt him.

“What?”

“Ishouldn’t have shut you out like that.” She pulls her feet onto the bed andhugs her knees. “I just didn’t know what to do after the mission failure, so Ithrew myself into investigating that rather than wasting time on other things.”

“Aw,thanks, Pidge,” he says, rolling his eyes despite the disappointment weighinghis heart down anew. “I’m glad that’s what I am to you.”

Her cheeks darken, and she waves her handfrantically to backtrack, “N-no, I didn’t mean it like that!”

“Oh,really?” He raises a skeptical eyebrow. “You mean I wasn’t trying to waste your time?”

“Th-that’snot it at all, Lance,” she says. She rests her forehead against her knees so hecan’t see her face. “It’s just…it was too tempting to use your connection and I didn’twant you to get caught up in this mess after you applied for the spot thatopened up in fighter class so I kept it to myself.”

Lance frowns, convinced that, for all thetruth in the statement, she hides something else, but he can’thelp quipping, “How thoughtful of you, Pidge.”

But then—

“Wait,how did you know about the spot that opened up?” he wonders, instantlysuspicious. “That happened a while after you started avoiding me.”

Pidge’s shoulders stiffen. “I don’t remember,”she says. “I might’ve come across it while I was hacking into the Garrison’ssystems and assumed you’d try for it.”

Lance doesn’t call her out on her obvious lie, notwhen relief fills him that her silenceis finally at an end and…well, maybe they can’t resume theirfriendship as it was before the mission failure, but they won’t have to startfrom scratch.

“Howcan I help?”

Pidge’s head whips around, her eyes bulging inbefuddlement. “What?”

He shrugs, feigning nonchalance despite hisheart pounding and the voice in his head that reminds him he’salready on thin ice in the Garrison’s eyes, and waves a hand. “You know, withyour…investigation.”

“Um…”She blinks once, twice, three times before saying, “Pretend like we didn’t knoweach other before.”

His heart plummets anew at that. “Why?”

“Ialready explained,” she says. She jumps to her feet and faces him, arms thrownout and eyes fixed on the ceiling. “It’s bad enough yourecognized me, so what if someone else does too?”

“But—”he tries to protest, but Pidge plows right through him.

“There’s…nothingyou can help with, Lance,” she says with a heavy exhale.

“ButI’m your friend!” He stands, flailing his arms and gesturing around her messyroom. “I can at least watch your back while you do your sneaky spy stuff!”

“I…maybe,”she concedes grudgingly, “but right now the best lead I’ve got requires I be asinconspicuous as possible.”

“D-doesthis mean you’re still switching teams?” His breath sticks in his throatpainfully at the thought that they can repair their friendship only for it tofracture moments later.

He grew up with Pidge; she’sas dear to him as…well, not a sister, exactly, but the last few months withouther - undoubtedly while she hurtand stewed over her father’s and brother’s not-deaths alone exceptfor her mother - left him almost listless with how much he missed her.

Pidge’s brown eyes bore into his as she says, “No,I guess that’s not necessary.” A slight smile finds its way onto her face,reassuring and warmingLance as much as her words. “Knowing one of my teammates is reason enoughto stay.”

#plance #pidgance #lidge #flirtyrobot #aksj;fkj;fsdf i tried i dunno how i did #i wonder if i've lost my touch BUT oh well #how come i post two fics in one day??#WELL this is the only one i wrote today SO #voltron #reem writes fic #Anonymous #also don't want to post anything day of/right before season eight #because i know people will be preoccupied with that #qna

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builder051 · 6 years ago

Note

Hi umm do you have a masterlist for your marvel fics? Sorry.

But of course. It’s a link at the top of my blog in desktop mode, and there’s also a link in my bio that should be accessible for both desktop and mobile users.��

I’ll paste the goods below (be aware that I completely rebuilt this about a week ago, so let me know if any of the links seem to not work/be wrong).

SPIDER-MAN

Spiderverse (mostly compliant with MCU Canon)

Prompt fill (Peter’s sick after the civil war fight)-contains vomit

No sympathy (Peter has a bad Halloween patrol)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (The day after Halloween is another bad one for Peter’s stomach)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Peter shouldn’t try to drink with Tony)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Peter’s sick in the car while Happy’s driving)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Peter leaves school because he’s sick, and May thinks he’s ditching)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Peter’s sick while at the Avengers facility, Pepper Potts comforts)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Peter does badly on a mission because he’s sick)

Prompt fill (Peter has a migraine)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Peter has a concussion)-contains vomit

spidermanspotter (Peter and Tony laugh about social media and migraines)

Ruins (Peter’s powers interfere with his dental surgery)-contains vomit

Live and learn (Peter’s sick at school and Tony picks him up)-contains vomit

Running (Peter and Tony have an argument. Peter runs away)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Peter is overstimulated and has a panic attack)-contains vomit

Rerun (Peter is sick at the Avengers facility again)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Peter has a migraine while training with Tony)-contains vomit

Aftermath (Peter heads to Avengers tower after his showdown with Vulture)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Peter gets a concussion while on patrol)-contains vomit

200 word ficlet (Peter nauseous coming off patrol)-contains vomit

Playing the fool (Peter’s sick at an Avengers party)

200-word ficlet (Peter’s nervous meeting Steve)-contains vomit

200-word ficlet (Peter has another concussion)

200-word ficlet (Peter explains fanfiction to Tony)

200-word ficlet (Peter struggles with repairing his suit)

200-word ficlet (Peter’s carsick with Tony and Happy)-contains vomit

200-word ficlet (Peter has appendicitis)-contains vomit

Now pick me up (Peter’s sick and Tony mother-hens)

What the heart of the young man said to the psalmist (That one scene from Infinity War)

The Tony and Peter ER headcaonon (what it says on the tin)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Tony takes Peter to the facility for the weekend without realizing the kid is sick)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Peter’s sick and May’s out of town, so he calls Tony)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Tony has trouble breathing, Peter assists)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Peter’s sick and Nat tells him stories)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Peter passes out from adrenaline crash)-contains vomit

Ain’t that a kick in the head (May’s on vacation and Peter and Tony both have a cold)

Spiderverse 2.0 (ED-verse)

Beautiful oblivion (the ffing Spider-Man novella)- contains vomit and big tw for eating disorders

The motives in your head (a re-telling of the last 2 chapters of Beautiful Oblivion from Tony’s POV)-contains vomit, big ED TW

CAPTAIN AMERICA

Missing Moments (Compliant with MCU canon)

Needle and the thread (Steve’s a wreck after coming off the ice)-contains vomiting

Left with what you had (Bucky’s carsick on the way to T'Challa’s palace, then overwhelmed with memories once they get there)-contains vomit

Who are the stars (Bucky’s in cryo; Steve can’t deal)-contains vomit

200-word ficlet (Bucky struggles in Wakanda, Shuri tries to assist)

Lose your faith in me (Missing moment pre-Infinty War. What was Steve up to while Bucky was in Wakanda?)

200-word ficlet (Bucky helps Shuri in the lab)

Powers/No Powers Choose-Your-Own-Adventure

Wait for tomorrow (Bucky contemplates suicide; Steve rescues him)-contains vomit

Stay with me, we’ll take the night (the 4th of July is a disaster for Steve and Bucky)-contains vomit

Come to me now and rest your head (Read on AO3–A short Stucky novella)-contains vomit

Pumpkin spice and everything nice (Bucky’s not a fan of Steve’s PSL)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Steve has food poisoning and Bucky assists)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Bucky has appendicitis)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Bucky’s sick while Steve’s out of town, Nat assists)-contains vomit

Prompt fill(Steve has a migraine, Bucky picks him up from work)

Prompt fill (Steve’s getting ill, but Bucky’s already having a bad day)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Bucky’s not feeling great, Steve doesn’t really notice)

Prompt fill (Bucky’s triggers)

Prompt fill (Bucky takes initiative to tell Steve he’s ill)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Bucky’s drunk)-contains vomit

Morning after (Bucky’s now hungover)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Steve runs himself ragged taking care of Bucky)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Steve has the flu, Bucky is a good caretaker)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Bucky has the flu)-contains vomit

The gun still rattles (Bucky battles with depression again)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Bucky’s unwell, and he calls Steve to come home)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Bucky’s sick with a bug)-contains vomit

200 word ficlet (Nat and Bucky stuck in an elevator)-contains vomit

Beatitude (Bucky continues to struggle with depression)

Burning for you (Steve has heat exhaustion)-contains vomit

200-word ficlet (Buck’s undone by a migraine)-contains vomit

Taste love and pain (another installment of Bucky vs. Depression)

Prompt fill (Bucky has a fever and a breakdown at Whole Foods)

Prompt fill (Bucky’s sick and dehydrated)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Bucky and Steve are both unwell, Laura B. attends)-contains vomit

Heroverse (Mostly canon through CA: TWS)

Drabble: Childhood Illness (Steve’s sick at school, Bucky is there to help)-contains vomiting

Prompt fill (Pre-serum Bucky with a migraine)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Pre-serum Bucky with stomach flu)-contains vomit

You can have my everything (The unthinkable happens to Steve)-contains vomit and TW for rape

Prompt fill (Steve is depressed and wakes up ill)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Steve has a concussion, Bucky assists)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Bucky’s on is first mission, it goes badly, and Steve’s not feeling great)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Steve’s poisoned on a mission and Bucky helps him)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Steve has a bad run-in with mind control tech)

Prompt fill (Steve is seasick)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Steve’s seasick again, this time with Bucky)-contains vomit

Sail away (again) (Bucky’s seasick this time)- contains vomit

200 word ficlet (Steve’s seasick on a cruise)-contains vomit

Butane in my veins (Steve’s poisoned on a mission and doesn’t want to disturb Bucky)-contains vomit

Where are you going with the mask I found (Bucky panics at a party)-contains vomit

200-word ficlet (Steve takes a hard hit on a mission)

Some nights I call it a draw (Sam struggles with grief, Steve tries to help)

Prompt fill (Bucky tries to keep sick Steve from going on a mission)-contains vomit

Whoa Bessie (AU-Verse featuring veteran Bucky and trans Steve)

Ignite your bones (the ffing Stucky novella)- contains vomit

Dodging bullets with your broken past (Bucky has a concussion and a setback)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Bucky is carsick except not really)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Steve is delirious with fever)-contains vomit

Hollow heroes separate (Bucky breaks down and really lets his feelings out)

Verse-less

200 word ficlet (Bucky waking up with stomach flu)-contains vomit

200-word ficlet (Steve’s trying to sleep with a migraine)

200-word ficlet (Steve and Bucky overhear the neighbors)

Prompt fill (Steve wakes in the night sick)-contains vomit

AVENGERS

Avengers Misc.

Love so fragile (The OG Nat and Clint motion sickness fic)-contains vomit

Mountain Roads (Clint is carsisck and Nat helps out)-contains vomit

Man in motion (Steve is airsick his first time in a modern jet–Avengers missing moment/rewritten scene)-contains vomit

Iron Man

Take the cake (Tony’s sick after sampling his birthday cake)-contains vomit

And up she rises (Tony feels the effects of palladium poisoning)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Tony suffers a concussion, Peter and Nat assist)-contains vomit

Science Bros

Where’s the fun in doing what you’re told (Tony wants to collab, Bruce happens to be post-hulk and sick)-contains vomit

Nat on Fire

Hotter than a fantasy, lonely like a highway (Natasha is in crisis, Steve attempts to help)-contains vomit

And if the night is burning (Nat’s hurt on a mission, everyone needs a mental health day)-contains vomiting

Open fire (Natasha is in crisis, Steve asists)-contains vomit

Burning black (Nat on Fire 4.0, Nat’s held captive and assaulted)-contains vomit and TW for implied rape

There’s a fire inside when I’m falling over (Steve’s frame of mind at the end of Nat on Fire 4.0) TW for implied rape

Barton fam

Clint and Laura sickfic drabble (Clint’s up during the night with a stomach bug)-contains vomit

Clint and Laura sickfic drabble, part 2 (a continuation of the above)-contains vomit

The Clint is too nauseous to make breakfast headcanon (what is says on the tin)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (It’s his daughter’s birthday, and Clint comes home with a stomach bug)-contains vomit

200-word ficlet (Clint’s down with a migraine and has to call Nat for backup)-contains vomit

Bruce/Natasha

I’m just a ghost running scared (Bruce is ill after hulking out, Nat assists)-contains vomit

Thor

Short drabble: Loki + stomach bug

Point of no return (Loki panics at the looming presence of Thanos)

200-word ficlet (Loki panics and is sick)-contains vomit

Black Panther

Round the table (T'Challa has a stomach bug on his first trip to the Avengers facility)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (T'Challa is ill, Bucky assists)-contains vomit

The T'Challa and Shuri antacids headcanon (what it says on the tin)

Prompt fill (Nat comforts T'Challa after T'Chaka’s death)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (T'Challa’s sick at the gym)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (T'Challa’s sick on the jet)-contains vomit

Panthera quartet (T'Challa whump missing moments)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (T'Challa’s injuired, Nat tells Shuri)

Prompt fill (Shuri breaks down post-Infinity War)

Prompt fill (Bucky is ill in Wakanda, Shuri and T'Challa attend)-contains vomit

200-word ficlet (T'Challa’s cold interferes with his kingly duties)

200-word ficlet (T'Challa is sick and embarrasses Shuri)-contains vomit

200-word ficlet (Shuri’s overheated and sick, T'Challa hovers)-contains vomit

Sargent Pepper and T'Challa’s lonely heart (Pepper helps a sick and homesick T'Challa)

Prompt fill (Nakia calls out T'Challa’s fever)

Prompt fill (T'Challa’s done after a bad mission)-contains vomit

Short drabble (Shuri calls T'Challa for help)

Prompt fill (T'Challa’s sick in a meeting, Nat assists)-contains vomit

JESSICA JONES/AVENGERS CROSSOVERS

A ticket costs only your mind (Jessica Jones/Avengers crossover: read on AO3)-contains vomit

Call me the worst (Jessica Jones/Avengers crossover: Jess attempts suicide–OBVIOUS TRIGGER WARNINGS)-contains vomit

DAREDEVIL

Keep climbing the (green) mountain (Matt struggles with non-24 and caffeine addiction)-contains vomit

The things they said could restore me (Matt’s cold is a real wallop in the gut)-contains vomit

200-word fic (Matt’s emotional and sick after a loss at trial)-contains vomit

Prompt fill (Matt’s sick and dizzy, Foggy comes to the rescue)-contains vomit

#marvel #mcu #spiderman #captain america #black widow #black panther #iron man #hulk #avengers #jessica jones #daredevil #master fic list

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thcangriestboy-a · 3 years ago

Text

Headcanon

Sorry, this is another not so fun headcanon around David’s illness and tendencies. Again, I’m going to plop this particular one under a cut because it does deal with the following triggers: self harm, suicide, suicidal ideation and suicidal thoughts. It does touch on things across his verses, but it includes stuff related to canon as well. This is largely looking at intentionality when it comes to some of his more violent traits.

Note: the details of all of this would never be included in a thread if I am aware that you aren’t comfortable with it. This is more just my brain dump because work is slow today.

In canon/Farouk-based verses, it’s important to note that any acts of self harm/self injury or suicide are David’s choices alone. It is not something that can be blamed on Farouk (outside of the fact that his tormenting/possessing David is likely worsening his symptoms) in so much as Farouk is not strong enough to overtake David and does not want him dead because he needs him. This is backed up in the FX Pilot wherein the noose David made from an electrical cord disappears after he tries to kill himself.

David is not in a situation where he is using pain as a stimulus or a distraction. In David’s case (and frequently in men with schizophrenia) that actual “goal” of his actions is to make something - usually a delusion, a voice, a thought - stop. It’s way less organized or meticulous compared to someone where its their primary symptom or issue. Intent is important here and in David’s case, his intention probably isn’t to hurt himself. It’s a byproduct of everything else going on in his head.

When/if he acts out violently to those around him, that’s slightly different in that is far more likely to be driven by something delusional making him *want* to hurt that other person usually for protective purposes. This is probably more intentionally dangerous than if he hurts himself, though both can have devastating outcomes.

David is not consistently suicidal, though this may largely be because he’s generally compliant on his medications. His delusions are less likely to make him suicidal than to lead him to hurting himself or others without the intent of suicide. But that doesn’t mean that those things never happen or could never happen. We know from canon, that they did, but it tends to be more driven by David wanting an out than him being “made” to do it.

You could argue, for example, that his discussions around going back in time and Butterfly Effecting himself to never exist is arguably suicidal, but again, intentional on David’s part, not driven by other voices, hallucinations, or even people around him.

#headcanon #tw: suicide #tw: suicidal thoughts #tw: self harm #tw: schizophrenia

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abe-woodhull · 7 years ago

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theres nothing wrong with sewlett ok.

Okay, so I think I’m going to address this. I’m assuming this is in response to my post where I sort of when on a rant in the tags about how there’s a lot of glorification of abuse and murder and Simcoe in the Turn community right now. I’ll admit, that was a pretty sloppy post that I most likely made late at night with is definitely riddled with typos and half-arguments. In a way, I wish you would have maybe replied to my actual post rather than coming on anon to try to have this conversation but I hope this helps to clarify my position and others are free to respond to this directly if they wish.

And a warning!: I’m going to be talking about abuse a lot in this post! I totally understand if that’s not something people dont want to see and please feel free to not read or click off whenever you feel!

Firstly, I’ll state that I don’t have any power over what people do or do not ship or what content is or is not made within a fandom and I don’t want that type of power. I’d be an asshole so acting as if I do was sort of a dick move of me. I concede that this whole post is just my personal opinions and not meant to be an attack on anyone who actually ships it. People can ship or make whatever they want and I’m glad there’s a platform where people can do that.

However, (and that’s a big however) I don’t think that justifies the implications behind an idea or makes it “not wrong.” Again, this is all just my opinions and my perspective on the issue. It’s just my view, just how I morally view such a concept, and by no means is anyone meant to just automatically agree with me.

So let’s start with the origins of this, as far as I can tell. I’m obviously not a member of the community, so expect that I’ll get something wrong, but this is from my perspective. There was an episode in season four where Simcoe was in a bed and Hewlett held a knife to his throat. I’m sure we all remember it. Ever since then, the tags have been flooded with that ship. That might not be the origin of the ship, but it undeniably got a lot more people posting about Sewlett and making content.

I’ll remind you that the event I just referred to specifically in season four was Hewlett threatening to end Simcoe’s life after what I assume is months of the two going back and forth trying to off each other through schemes, and that’s in season four alone. It’s an even longer span of time if you go back into the previous seasons, but I’ll get back to that in a second. The point I’m trying to make here is that these two frequently try to kill each other. That’s an incredibly important aspect of their relationship, for lack of a better word, in the show. It’s also extremely important to a lot of Hewlett’s character development due to the fact that he shows Simcoe mercy when Simcoe has been trying to kill him for years. You can even argue that the action also developed Simcoe’s character but that doesn’t excuse the years of attempted murder.

I really want to drive this point home because it’s very, very important to recognize. So here are some examples of when these two clashed, which may be a bit graphic, my apologies (and these are only the most notable examples):

Season 2, Episode 5: Sealed Fate

Simcoe murders an officer in the Continental Army, cuts out his tongue, and writes a letter in his blood that claims Hewlett did it. This causes soldiers under the now dead officer to seek revenge, just as Simcoe planned and part of that plan was to have Hewlett captured, tortured, and eventually executed.

Season 2, Episode 7: Valley Forge

The conditions Hewlett is kept in are extremely inhumane, as I’m sure Simcoe counted on. He is routinely being subject to what I’ll call torture as the Continentals try to goad him into confessing to the murder of their leader. This becomes so bad that Hewlett gets frostbite and has to cut off three of his toes, which Simcoe later mocks.

Additionally, Simcoe’s advancements on Anna are extremely clear. Not only does Simcoe set out to murder Hewlett for power gain in Setauket, it seems that he also sets out in order to manipulate Anna’s favor.

I’ll move onto the bit where Simcoe and Hewlett actually meet in this episode, though there is much more I can elaborate on. He continuously mocks Hewlett and revels in his pain, saying, “Seeing you like this is a welcomed surprise.” Simcoe has obvious intent to kill Hewlett then. But, as I’m sure we all remember quite well, Hewlett stabs Simcoe in what I personally believe to be self-defense.

Season Three, Episode Two: Cold Murdering Bastards

Hewlett and Abe conspire to get Simcoe out of the picture by murdering him, a plan that plays out for the next several episodes.

Etc.

I won’t go into such specifics when it comes to season four, as the whole Hewlett subplot essentially revolves around the two trying to kill each other. It starts with Simcoe sending rangers after him to frame him for the murder of Lola and to kill him, then Hewlett scheming with Abe again to take him out, and this back and forth continues until Simcoe returns from the battlefield in Virginia. This is where Hewlett considers killing him but then shows mercy, which I will say, at least from my perspective, doesn’t erase the literal years the two spent trying to kill each other.

Notice, I didn’t even go into every instance of their toxicity. I chose examples of episodes where they literally tried to get rid of each other through violence. This doesn’t even take into consideration the numerous different ways Simcoe attempted to psychologically damage Hewlett.

The point of that all was to show that in the canon, Hewlett and Simcoe’s relationship, again, for lack of a better word, has nearly always been one where they were trying to get rid of each other. You can argue that Hewlett showing mercy changes that, but his speech points more towards the hope of order and the future rather than hope for Simcoe. And even if it did, it still doesn’t erase the years spent trying to kill each other.

In my perspective, whatever potential for actual romantic involvement points pretty heavily towards legitimate abuse.

I suppose one might argue that the ship is based more on headcanon than actual canon, but then I ask, doesn’t that completely erase the characters all together? If their development is so intertwined with years of this one-on-one war with each other, then isn’t that ignoring that development altogether if you’re ignoring the canon aspect? Isn’t that ignoring their characters?

Not only that, but from what I see of the content that I happen upon in the tags, the abuse is still pretty prevalent.

And if the argument is that the canon is taken into consideration, and that applies to the posts I’ve seen, then it’s sort of a double bind.

Here’s my issue with that. With this, I’m not trying to say that anyone personally is advocating for abuse and I’m not trying to attack anyone. However, from what I see, the ship as a whole seems pretty lenient about the potential and actual abuse within the ship and is compliant with that concept. I feel that some of the stuff that comes from the ship glorifies some abuse and a lot of attempted homicide.

And then, finally, the reason I made a post in the first place: If it were just a small movement, I’d likely just leave the subject alone altogether. I would have seen it, probably would have privately been uncomfortable or talk about the issue with my group of friends, but then just not say anything publically about it. However, it now makes up an overwhelming portion of the new content produced by the turn fandom on this site, making it and the values it represents a big staple in the community now. Frankly, it makes me feel sort of alienated since I strongly disagree with it and now I feel that there’s not much I can contribute to the fanbase anymore. And I don’t really want to contribute if that’s going to be the staple of the fandom as my personal values really don’t reflect that and I don’t feel I can personally condone that.

Personally, I feel there’s a lot of ships that in Turn with the potential of whatever gratification people get from Sewlett without some of the more problematic aspects. Not only that, I feel some of them are backed up by canon. But again, I’m not in charge of what people like and I don’t seek to be.

Again, everyone else can do whatever they want. I also feel I’m allowed to post my criticisms of it on my little platform and others are allowed to respond respectfully with their view and perspective.

Sorry for this extremely long post and explanation. I hope it clears some stuff up. Again, I wasn’t attempting to attack anyone personally or say that my opinion is 100% correct. This was merely what I see. Thanks for reading.

#turn amc #hewlett #simcoe #ask

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