#sorry for ranting i'm always so angry when thinking about their potential

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

IDK if that “neutral” Malleus anon is still checking out your blog but even if they aren’t I wanna say it’s not cool of them to send that rant in. Them being so angry makes me think they are actually a Malleus fan because why would you be so mad if you really were neutral about him. Acting like that to one of the most moderate dragon dislikers I know of is why Malleus fans have a bad name.

[Referencing this post!]

Well, I admit that I also found it odd that someone claiming to be neutral about a character would also get so worked up about said character... but I don't know Anon, so I'd rather not make assumptions about them if I can help it. Regardless of how they personally feel about Malleus, the fact remains that they felt strongly enough about my opinions that they were motivated to send in what was swirling around in their mind. The ask started off polite, but then became hostile despite prefacing with "don't take the following as an attack on you" and "I tried to be as respectful as possible" 💦 You don't really think clearly or act like yourself when you're letting your emotions rule you, so I wonder if their emotions just got the better of them once they started typing and then their ask sort of... spiraled from there. ahlbbbayvaqwevuqwoyve Thank you for the title of Most Moderate Dragon Disliker/j 😭 I feel like fandoms throw around the word "hate" too easily these days, so if I have to say I don't like something, I'll opt for "dislike" instead. "Hate" always sounds so harsh and unrelenting (ie "this can NEVER be better"), and that's worlds apart from "critique" (ie "how can this be better?"), the latter being what I actually aim for. I won't blindly hate on a character, I'll stop and ask myself why is it that I don't like them and how could they improve. I don't understand how it is that hate and critique are so commonly conflated... Anyway, shoutout to the sane folks that don't get their panties in a twist when others express a different opinion than them OTL and I am so, so sorry that Malleus likers have a loud minority making y’all look bad…

As I said in my response to the other ask in this post, I don't want to make assumptions about Anon or their life. However 💦 I will confess that I was very surprised by those parts of the ask. At first, I thought Anon was mentioning they speak Japanese and Korean because non-native English speakers will usually preface with something like this to warn me of potentially strange wording or typos. But then this particular ask (despite its length) ended up being in perfect English??? So I wondered why they mentioned their languages to begin with. They did say "Here in Japan", which seems to imply they do live there + speak the language but... again, I find it sort of strange to bring those up without making it very relevant?? If it was intended to lend them more credibility, I thought they would share more about the JP fandom or discuss particular polls more in-depth. (That would have been really interesting, actually!)

My surprise wasn't at the lack of information though, it was at the tone taken and the words used. It may be a little difficult for English-only speakers to understand, but 💦 the way Anon wrote didn't read very "Japanese" to me. Certain phrases (like lo and behold), slang (like LMAO), and even the cadence feel more western than Japanese. These, I guess, could be attributed to code switching (switching languages)?? Sometimes there would be overlap between the two (in this case, English and Japanese)--but more importantly, the overall tone of the ask was extremely confrontational. That was honestly the biggest "huh" for me. Not a single Japanese person I know speaks so aggressively, even when they are caught up in their emotions.

Again, I want to be clear that I'm not accusing Anon of anything, I'm only expressing my shock at the lack of... I guess manners in the ask (even though they said they intended to be respectful)??? When maintaining decorum and staying in one's lane are stressed so much in JP fandoms, especially when interacting with other fans. Anon's ask was like the total opposite of what I'm used to seeing from JP fans ^^;;

I think people tend forget that how you express yourself is just as important as choosing to express yourself in the first place? If you come at someone sounding angry and defensive from the get-go, the person you're trying to engage with will be much less willing to hear you out 💦

I don't really care if they (or others) see Malleus a certain way! It only becomes a problem when they start confronting other people with it (which, unfortunately, happened). And no need to apologize for other people's actions!! You didn't do anything wrong here. I do appreciate the sentiment though!! 🫶

I don't get why some people get so upset at different opinions existing?? (I don't think I even express my opinion in a hateful manner, which is what I believe Anon was accusing me of.) 😔 It's different opinions that make discussions with other fans interesting (and, in Twst itself, it's different opinions that cause conflicts to arise and make up the story that we enjoy). A world without different opinions would surely be a dull one. That specific Anon for sure has to learn how to better contain their anger. I hope that they realize that acting as they did only 1) makes Malleus likers (or I guess "Malleus neutral" fans, as they claim they are) in general look terrible, because even if the majority of them don't act this way, it's the worst experiences that will stick out the most in people's minds and 2) Malleus Draconia is not real and will not personally thank them for crusading for him. This certainly does not help my opinion of him, because this isn't my first time being harassed by someone associated with Malleus. I just do not get what people think they get out of acting this way??? Does it make them feel... satisfied after they rant at an internet stranger??? Make them think they achieved something?? 😅 There are surely more productive methods of catharsis than this... Maybe talking it over with a friend, double checking their phrasing + tone before sending in that ask, waiting until their emotions aren't running as high, even blocking or scrolling on would have been better.

I don't really know anything about Bakugo (other than he's really angy and people like him a lot??) but I find it really funny that his + Crewel's birthday is 4/20 blaze it 😶

[arcane-ish]

Cait's sacrifice versus Vi's predictability

I have issues with this scene/line. Or Cait's role in general at the beginning of this scene.

I have ranted a lot about how imo a big problem of season 2 is that to me (1) Vi really needed more combat effectiveness in Act 2 2.) it sometimes feels like the two most important people in her life and story, Jinx and Caitlyn, have decided that Vi doesn't get to make decisions.

(I feel like I have another rant inside of me on that, so that might still be coming)

I consumed one of the Amanda interviews and imo in one she spun a pretty good tale. I remember it as that essentially this is a big deal, this means Cait was giving Vi an escape, that she was willing to let Vi go, to give her up. That at that point, she didn't know that she would see Vi again or lose her forever.

And you know, I can vibe with that. That's the kind of thing I could get into. Caitlyn lunderstanding that Vi would try to get to Jinx. Caitlyn having seen Jinx's protectiveness of Vi after Vi got injured at least having enough trust that Jinx won't be a danger to Vi. Caitlyn leaving the tools behind for Vi to go and free Jinx. Caitlyn sitting back in her room not knowing whether Vi will choose to run off with Jinx (like was brought up during the season 1 dinner). Caitlyn going down and not being sure what she'll find. Caitlyn not knowing if she'll see Vi again.

Except that last bit? I don't buy.

Cait doesn't look surprised or relieved to see Vi is still there.

And every single line she says:

"I had a feeling I might find you here" "You really think I needed all the guards at the hexgates?" "Sorry to say, you've grown a bit predictable"

Just emphasizes that she knew what would happen and that Vi would be there. The opposite of "she was worried that she might have lost Vi and not see her again".

It makes her feel very in control (again specialy combined with "master detective and analyst Caitlyn" and we already had Caitlyn very similarly predicting Vi would join the enforcers especially if combined with certain leading actions from Caitlyn).

Again, that doesn't undo other aspects of the scene. There's still "Caitlyn knows Vi very well" and it's still a sacrifice there for Caitlyn because she's letting Jinx go free despite Cait's wish for revenge and over any fears that Jinx might hurt or kill more people when she's out there or any ideas about justice and punishment.

But as far as "Caitlyn was willing to give Vi up and didn't know if she had lost her forever" goes? I gotta go head canon rejected on that one. Yes of course there was still a potential chaos chance here, but if everything about the scene, everything about the dialogue signals that Cait knew Vi would be there, I just can't give credit. You don't get bravery points for betting on red when you know for sure red will come up next.

My theory is that the scene is the way it is because the focus is more on Vi. Caitlyn can't look glad and relieved because we start the scene Vi beating herself up about making the wrong choices and fearing Caitlyn will be angry at her and that she'll lose Caitlyn.

In the situation, Caitlyn's light and humorous touch likely is the completely right strategy. And Caitlyn saying and signaling "I always knew what choice you'd make and I'm okay with it, I wanted you to make it, this is a safe space for your choices" is probably exactly what Vi loves to here.

So it work for Vi and Vi's perspective in this scene. It's just not how I usually prefer my couples to be written. I always like couples best when to me they feel like a balance, two strong point of views, two strong stories against each other. Rather than "this is the blorbo and that is the blorbo being acted on" or "this is the blorbo and this is the blorbo being serviced".

(again this doesn't mean that not both Caitlyn and Vi have strong stories, just that it doesn't always congeal correctly for me in s2, but then again, how some aspects of CaitVi in s2 feel fanficcy to me and a good example of how fanfic dynamics can work but can also just feel off sometimes)

[runwhileyoucan]

If no one is going to talk about the potential of the super cute family dynamic that muriel and the ineffible huabunda have...

I FUCKIN WILL

So i was rewaching s2 and i was like

"OMG MURIEL AND THE INEFFIBLE HUSBANDS IS SUCH A CUTE FAMILY DINAMIC"

So writed up some stuff mostly fluff but mit be angsty take it all in

（Sorry for the bad English not my first language ）

・Muriel always wears white because they wore as an angel but Crowley keeps on giving them red and jewellery because he likes black and red

・"Crowley “muriel what pronouns do you use？”

Muriel “what？”

Aziraphale “oh..of course（explains the consept)”

muriel“oh i think i like they/them”

Crowley“got it”

・Crowley keeps on buying sweets every time they go out on a walk because muriel never asks them self because they want to be selfless

・Aziraphael makes Crowley pay in the "swearing jaw" so Crowley is a good influence on muriel

・Nina “is that your kid？”

・Crowley “what！？well uh somethin like that”

・Muriel keeps on asking Crowley questions like"why does the moon glow" and because Crowley loves the stars and space stuff so much he goes on a rant and muriel's too plight to say stop. But it's quite interesting.

・Muriel likes Physical affection so Crowley gives lots of candles but Crowley giving hugs is very rare. So when they get a hug from Crowley they immediately go and tell Aziraphale.

・Muriel gets very upset that Crowley had to fall because he's so nice to them.

・Crowley secretly gives pocket money to Muriel but muriel didn't realise it was a secret and instantly tells Aziraphale about it.

・Cross azi

・Every time Crowley gest angry Crowley leaves the room not to scare/harm them with the smoke and lightning and god knows what

・muriel always wants Crowley to put his sunglasses off because they like lookin at his eyes

・Muriel“pleasessssss”

Crowley &Aziraphael “no！！”

・Muriel tries to teach Crowley to read better but Crowleys like “words hurt my eyes”（still tryes his best.）

・when all three of them go on Vacations people just assume they are family. AND THEY DON'T CORRECT THEM 

・Aziraphael reads to muriel before they go to sleep because Crowley made them believe bed monsters are real

・Muriel“the bed monster is going to get me！”

*Aziraphale glares at Crowley until he apologises*

・Crowley giving muriel a lift on the bentley to literally anywhere

・Crowley“Oi angels we are runnin late get in the bently RIGHT NOW”

・Crowley“Angel can you―”

Muriel & Aziraphael “yes？”

Crowley “oh uh sorry”

・Crowley giving all the food that he dosant like to muriel and azi being like “Crowley！eat your vegetables！”

・when muriel and Crowley fight（because azi and muriel can just talk it out） muriel says something like

“but that was mean！” and Crowleys like

“well i'm a demon” and muriel goes of to think of a reply and two hours later their like“but your a nice demon！”

and it goes on for theys antill Crowley gets bord or azi interfiers.

I love all of them smmm love this ineffible family（dont know if its the right name）

[muppetears-stuff]

Warren hate has always been ableist in the very beginning. He gets too much shit for not understanding Max's body language. He gets a lot of hate 'for not taking a hint' or understanding social cues. Hell in the very beginning of the fandom like in 2015 i think i remember there were angry pricefielders calling Warren the literal r slur because he's 'so stupid'. Their words not mine. l I've seen people talk about how they're convinced he's a s*ciopath or a n*rcissist or a ps*chopath which I find ableist and uncomfortable. I think the biggest red flag from the fandom is how there's a lot of shit talk about Warren is an 'obsessive freak/stalker' in their eyes to talking in general about how 'obsessiveness' and 'obsessions' are red flags and are signs of 'evil' apparently and not symptoms of mental illness or neurodivergency apparently. I really relate to Warren and I also suffer from obsessive and actual intrusive thoughts, so i find this fandom to be extremely cruel and alienating toward people with stigmatizing illnesses which I find explains the Chloe demonization bc she is so BPD coded. I don't think Warren is autistic coded like Max but I do think he's ADHD / OCD coded in a way I can't explain. Sorry to drop this really long rant in your inbox, but you're not wrong about the Warren demonization and I just wanted to say something about it. Becauze the demonization of all these characters go back to ableism and the Life Is Strange fandom is the most ableist fandom I've ever been in at all and that really speaks volume about how atrocious it is.

THIS ^^^ YES. FUCKING YES, ABSOLUTELY.

I find the Warren hate unwarranted (hehe) and SUPER FUCKING ABLEIST. you make amazing points, thank you for putting my thoughts into words anon🙏🙏

He very much struggles with social interactions, very evident by the way he only talks teachers or people that are into the same stuff as him, he can become very chatty, sometimes too much, when it comes to things he likes which comes off as "annoying" and "obsessive" when he just wants friends.

Mr. Well's talks about it in his student file, btw.

I share. Alot of the same traits as Warren, with myself also having ADHD and liking science and talking excessively to the point where I find MYSELF annoying.

It's so upsetting too that the developers leaned INTO the stalker/obsessive Warren allegations that I can't even fucking talk about him or mentioning that I like him on certain platforms without the fear of people saying I "support stalking" which I don't. I can't defend him and say that he wasn't stalking without someone going, "but it's canon, the developers confirmed it!!" Yeah well, Mark and Nathan have done some more fucked up shit and I still see people defend them. (I love Nathan too for his complexity and ability to become better. He just needed help, but it doesn't excuse anything he did.)

Warren is the best character. He had so much potential to be an amazing recurring character, but he was their simply for plot convenience or to make the player not suspicious that Mark could be behind everything because Warren was "creepy"

I'm probably gonna have people saying I'm being a baby over this and that he's a fictional character and stuff, you can totally have your own opinion on Warren Graham, I'm not telling you you can't, just please stop calling people who like him "stalkers" or say they support stalking and creepy behavior, when that isn't true. The amount of hate towards anyone that isn't Max or Chloe, and then the immediate hate on YOU for not liking them or liking/defending another character makes me sick, as well as the flat out abelism. The reason why I left the fandom in the first place before picking it back up because of Warren<3

Thank you again, Anon. For sending me such a lovely ask(?) And letting me rant about him because he's my favorite, and I agree with you so much, you're so right<3

[crosbyism]

re: fandom feminization (sorry for beating this horse) - one of the things that definitely bothers me most as someone who actually does enjoy a certain amount of feminization in fic really is when looking at a fic of two men in a very masculine environment who are being written as gay- WHY is it so common to write them as though they are a heterosexual man and woman in a heterosexual relationship? specifically the kind of egregiously heteronormative relationship that makes people rage against media with relationships LIKE that for being misogynistic??? ykwim? one cooks and cleans and cries and has emotions and does the emotional labor and calms down the controlling and upset/angry or emotionless other man because he's the girlfriend and the pretty princess girlboy - GUYS why is that the standard relationship dynamic here, they're supposed to be queer men, why are you making a queer relationship so fucking BAD hetero, the antisemitist kind 😭 and it really is like always the smaller guy, the "prettier" guy who's nicer and more palatable to project femininity onto. across all fandoms no matter what. i don't even want to think about the infantilization that goes hand in hand with some of this. that's a rant best left alone 💀 anyways feel free to delete, i'm just another person the masculinization posts resonated with and i appreciate seeing others feel the same !

anon i feel u dot org. it’s not my cup of tea either. i think it’s important to keep in mind that fandom works do not have the same “responsibility” (in as much there’s any responsibility in storytelling to be had at all, but that’s a whole different topic i won’t get into) in storytelling as traditional media, being very personal expressions of creativity first and foremost. people are simply into writing this type of thing for themselves, and that’s exactly what they should do without shame. i very much do understand why people would write those kinda dynamics (any number of reasons from “i want to project heteronormativity onto a queer relationship for personal catharsis” to “i want to explore this kind of dynamic” to “lol crackfic” to “i just feel like it idk”, all of which are totes fine and cool). personally i really don’t feel drawn to it at all. rip fanon mitch marner i guess.

what’s interesting is that it really is like that in every fandom. sometimes it get me sad that a lot of gender play in fandom is so cisheteronormative. like, there’s so much potential to get weird and strange with it, y’know? i would love a lot of more non cisheteronormative gender play fics. or, man, i would kill for a guy to finger his coach and go “oh, the menopause is making you drier, huh? that’s alright, i’ve got the lube right here, i’ll get you nice and wet, don’t worry” and service him like he’s a hot cougar’s young stud.

there’s a couple of rare gems in the hrpf tag re: slightly non-traditional gender play for sure, but it def isn’t the majority. i also think cause the majority of gender play in fandom is so cishet it kinda repels people who don’t like that from writing or getting into that in general, so clearly we need to fix this out here and reclaim the genderplay lol. make genderplay queerer 2024

(side note: i think you might be using antisemitist wrong? is that a typo? i don’t think you meant “bigoted towards jewish people” there? lol? that was confusing)

[bi-bard]

Regret My Touch So Much That You Curse Your Baptism - Kaz Brekker Imagine [Shadow & Bone]

Title: Regret My Touch So Much That You Curse Your Baptism

Pairing: Kaz Brekker X Reader

Word Count: 1,292 words

Warning(s): touch aversion, author trying to be dramatic

Summary: [Inspired by "salvation" by Christabelle Marbun] Kaz finds himself faced with a problem. His attempt to solve the problem seems to have consequences that he had not anticipated.

Author's Note: I... love this song so much.

I know that I haven't written for this show in ages, but since the second season came out, I decided to give it a shot again.

----------------------

Kaz asking to meet with you was never necessarily a good thing.

It was usually a sign of something very important happening and I have found that something so important was rarely good.

I had known Kaz for a fair number of years. Even then, I never truly felt like I completely understood him. There were so many different parts of himself that he kept locked away, each with a wildly different key. I had been trying for ages to get him to open up to me. It had yet to happen.

Kaz was silent when I met with him that day.

I had greeted him, but he merely nodded as a way to acknowledge my existence. I could have laughed. I could have sworn that the two of us were much closer than what warranted his behavior.

"Can I ask what this meeting is about," I asked, taking a moment to scan the room.

"You," he stood firm in his spot across the room from me.

I raised an eyebrow at him. "I might need more detail."

He looked away from me, pretending to be more focused on something nearby. I watched his cane spin a bit under his hand.

"Kaz-"

"You have gotten in my way," he stopped me.

I scoffed. "Pardon? In what way?"

"I have found myself unable to pull my thoughts from you," he explained. "It has gotten in the way of my work."

"Do you want me to apologize," I found myself chuckling as the question escaped me. "I'm sorry that I'm memorable?"

"I didn't ask you here to insult me."

"I would be happy to hear why you wanted to meet with me over this."

"In the hopes that confessing it will be enough for it to end," he sounded... exhausted. As if he had truly tried every other solution that he could think of but could not find one to bring him peace.

Like a man confessing his sins in the hopes of being forgiven.

"I see," I nodded. "Well, please feel free to tell me how well this works for you-"

"You don't understand," he cut me off.

I almost scoffed again, but he didn't give me the chance.

"You have become all-consuming," he almost sounded angry. "All-consuming and distracting. You have blocked all other thoughts that I could have. I would give anything to focus on something outside of you, but I can't."

I was stunned for a moment. Not just because of his word, but because of his voice. It was as if he were blaming me for being such a "distraction" to him.

"Is that why you asked me to meet you," I asked. "To rant about me being some 'distraction' as if I was doing it on purpose?"

He didn't have a response to the question.

I wondered if he had practiced this moment in his head. If he had considered what words he should say to get his point across. If he had considered every potential response that he could get when those words were spoken.

I wondered if my particular collection of words had never crossed his mind and that was why no response seemed to form.

"Do something about it," I said.

"Excuse me?"

I stepped forward. "You heard me perfectly well."

Kaz raised an eyebrow at me.

I walked even closer to him, careful to keep enough distance between us that he could back away at any point.

He didn't. Instead, he stepped forward after me. Still not touching but teetering on the edge of the cliff. I felt like if I breathed too heavily, then my chest would brush his.

I had to force myself to keep eye contact with him.

Kaz was always intense. His life required the ability to be intimidating when he needed to be. So much so that it must have become second nature to him at some point. Even in this moment, his eyes were enough to make me want to back down from my moment of bravery.

But I don't think he wanted me to.

He didn't want to tell me all of this just so I'd run. That would be... foolish.

"I want to know why you chose now," my voice was soft due to the proximity, not due to fear. "What corner of your mind did I finally haunt that forced you to confess this to me?"

His silence spoke as a false warning.

"I can't force you to tell me anything or do anything," I continued. "But if I hold so much power over you and your thoughts... I would like to know the extent of my reach. I would hate to abuse such a gift. How much of your days and nights are consumed by this... 'all-consuming' thought of me?"

I felt my heart rate spike when the leather on his free hand brushed against mine. He didn't grab my hand or intertwine our fingers. He merely placed them against each other. Testing how much pressure my skin placed on the leather. How much of my touch could he truly feel through the barrier?

"I see," I whispered. "The great Kaz Brekker... never a truly open book."

I dragged my index finger along the length of his. I quite enjoyed the idea of being wanted. It was a new feeling, but it was one that I could picture becoming addicted to.

"You have found your way into my thoughts too," I explained. "Right in the back of my mind... just waiting. I would never call you a distraction, but I suppose I could overlook that."

The only sign of him being anything other than perfectly in control was his eyes. They were jumping around my face too much for me to be convinced that he had full control of the situation. I decided that whatever suffering I had put him through had been enough.

"All I need is for you to say that you want me in the same way that I want you," I said. At some point, forcing myself hold his gaze had become second nature. I didn't need to fight the nerves sitting in my chest any longer. If anything, those same nerves now held my chin in place. "Say it and I'm yours, Kaz."

I watched Kaz take a long breath. Calming his own nerves. I never thought about how Kaz would calm his nerves. He always seemed so in control of them that the idea felt... wrong. Pointless.

Seeing him do it now felt like something close to intimate.

"I want you to be mine," he managed to whisper out. "Please..."

The idea of someone's shell cracking made perfect sense to me. I watched pieces of Kaz's cold armor flake off like pieces of a wall chipping away over time. It felt impolite, but I was now desperate to know what hid away under that chipped paint. I knew better than to rush that process, but curiosity was a powerful motivator.

Finally, his hand properly grabbed mine. Kaz's thumb dug into my palm slightly. Grounding himself or holding me in place, I would never know.

"I want that too," I mumbled to him.

I watched his face relax slightly. I let a small grin form on my lips at the sight.

Kaz moved forward slightly. I didn't think it was possible.

There was still a safe space between us. Close but not touching. I had no desire to push anything in that moment.

I leaned back first.

Kaz leaned forward in an attempt to keep the space between us to a minimum. I had to fight the urge to smirk a little at him.

That feeling of being wanted was one that I could certainly get used to.

----------------------

Author's Note: I would like everyone to know that I spent about 15 minutes sitting in front of this screen, debating whether or not a kiss would fit here.

----------------------

Navigation Guide

What I Write For

Some Original Characters

[unwillingpuckbunny]

hello and welcome to e shouts. today's topic: the florida panthers stupidity in the playoffs

by now most, if not all, of you will know that matthew tkachuk was allowed to play game 4 of the stanley cup finals with a broken sternum and i have never been so angry or disappointed (although chicago getting first and therefore bedard is a close second)

now it's been speculated that this is only a hairline fracture not an entire break which is why he was still allowed to play but this is still unacceptable and shouldn't have been allowed to happen

some would say that 'playoffs are different' but having players on the ice whilst they're in immense pain and an incredibly vulnerable position to create a further, more impactful (as if a broken bone isn't already a bad enough) injury is irresponsible at best and negligent at worst.

how tkachuk was allowed to even think of playing in game 4 is inconceivable to me and definitely shouldn't have been allowed to occur

sources have said that brady had to help him out of bed after his pregame nap and teammates had to help him get dressed for the game. i think this should go without saying but IF A PLAYER CAN'T MOVE PROPERLY BY THEMSELVES THEN THEY SHOULDN'T BE PLAYING A HOCKEY GAME

how the coaches, medical staff and upper management allowed this to happen is beyond me and they shouldn't be able to walk away from this season and this incident (as well as the wider injuries other panther players injured through the playoffs who also still played) without any consequences.

no person who had a hand in allowing matthew onto that ice for that game should have to face consequences for allowing him to step onto that ice and potentially caused him to worsten this injury

every person beyond the ice in that organisation should want the best of their players and that doesn't involve allowing them to play with injuries, especially those as severe as broken bones

now this issue of allowing injured player (back) onto the ice isn't localised to the panthers. a recent example of this is when morgan barron of the winnipeg jets was allowed to return to the ice after receiving over 70 stitches to his face as a result of an accident on the ice when, during a scrum, his face was sliced open by laurent brossoit of the vegas golden knights (oh look full circle) earlier in the playoffs.

this is a league wide issue that needs to be tackled before a player causes permanent injury to themselves or others due to them playing with an injury.

this could be a possibility with some of the injured panther players who are set to be out from 2-6 months depending on their injuries and this could have a knock on effect for the new season and potentially even further in the future.

further care needs to be taken to ensure player safety - both physical and mental - and coaches and upper management should have more of a focus on their players rather than winning the cup - some things are just more important than a trophy and a ring.

sorry for the rant it's something i'm very passionate about. the nhl has a unique culture where playing through injuries is glorified and if this culture continues it will perpetuate the belief that the team will always need you - even of you are severely injured - and this can and will cause more harm than good. (just look at the number of ex nhl player crippled through the mis-use of pain medicine to continue playing to help their team)

to learn more about the nhl's problem with pain medication i recommend this documentary: W5: The high cost of painkiller abuse in professional hockey - YouTube

[mythicalthings]

this is for the sins you gave the odnlb idiots:

felix - pride

luka - sloth

marinette - wrath

gonna add some more

adrien - gluttony

lila - lust

chloe - envy

kagami - greed

Oooo I think all of these work very well! However! I would like to suggest a potential switch. Well. Less of a switch and more of a "These both work well."

Also hahahaha I went on a very long rant again I'm sorry.

I think Chloe very much fits Gluttony. Not only is it the over indulgence of food and drink, but also *wealth items*, and if I'm being more metaphoric! Chloe supplements her lack of friends, a family that loves her and whatever she doesn't have in life with material items. But it's not enough, she NEEDS the emotional support those people provide but nobody is willing to give it.

So she gets fancy dresses, she BUYS the support, she flaunts her wealth and uses it as a bargaining chip. But it's not enough. It was when she was a kid, but as an adult? She feels hollow because of it. She's left wanting those real connections, she's left empty. She's never full. So she is STILL supplementing using important items to show her importance, how useful she is, is determined by what she HAS. The snake, the bee, and knowledge that the rest lack.

Chloe has defined her worth by the things she has and what she can give, but it will always leave her feeling hollow because she, as a person wasn't good enough on its own. Luka, Ladybug, Monarque and Lila would never have accepted her help if she didn't have something they needed.

They didn't want her. She was just available.

Now! I think Adrien also fits a very good Envy! But that sounds weird on paper right? Adrien? Envious? Well, let me put it this way!

Adriens character is defined by what he doesn't have.

His driving forces in the story is that he wants what he can't have, what he was denied, what everyone else got.

He didn't have friends, he didn't get to go to school, he didn't get a normal family or life. He didn't get freedom, he wasn't allowed it.

So many scenes in the show are directly related to this too!

"I've never really had friends before." Was the line that he spoke to Marinette in origins. Something he didn't have, that everyone else did, but he didn't.

Chat Noir is the freedom to do what he wants, to get out of his oppressive home and be wild, goofy and wacky! Something he's not allowed to do as Adrien. He's locked away in his home, he's not allowed to be expressive and punny, it's bad for his image. He has to be soft, sweet, appealing to all. He has to be perfect.

Bad jokes aren't perfect. Emotional outbursts, joyous or angry are not perfect.

Adrien isn't allowed to be himself, something everybody else can be, but not him, but he wants to be himself.

"I've never seen a movie with a friend before." A common experience for just about everyone! But not Adrien. Something he wants, but can't have. He can have friends, but not ones that actually understand him, not ones he gets to see outside of school, his best friend can't even come to his house.

Even birthday parties and presents from his parent are denied to Adrien. Everybody else gets one, but not him.

Romance is one of the single most important things to Adrien, but something he has categorically failed at in just about every way.

Ladybug? Ladybug has made it very clear there's no chance for them. Secrets get in the way, Hawkmoth gets in the way, Lila gets in the way, his father gets in the way, but his best friend gets to have his girlfriend with him every day and they get to go on dates!

Kagami? Crashed and burned. Kagami didn't get to see what Adrien really was and he TRIED to let her see it. But she was too blinded by what she expected was the real him. And then the thing he perceived as freedom was the reason he lost a chance at romance.

Adrien doesn't get to have a normal family. His father borderline resents him at times, and only opens up when Adrien has been in mortal danger or attempts to do something he perceives as bad and wrong. Other than those very few times? His father doesn't eat with him, doesn't speak to him unless it's business and his secretary relays messages back and forth.

He lost his mother. And all of his friends (save for Alix but are they really friends?) have mother's who love and adore them. They have father's who love and adore them (save for Luka but are they really friends? Okay that one was mean) and so on.

Adriens entire story is defined by him desperately trying to get the things he does not have in his life. Adrien wants and wants and wants but is denied and denied and denied. He doesn't get a normal family, he doesn't get friends, he doesn't get love, he doesn't get to have anything. And why can't he? Why can't he just for once have what everyone else has?

Why wouldn't he be envious of everybody else in his life?

[strawberry-muffin-crisis]

I just read your rant and boy howdy was it lovely, I absolutely agree with you on all of it but I would like to point something out

Sophie rejected Dex before she kissed him

Dex had his hopes and dreams stamped out (Violently!! She did not just calmly go "No, sorry, I don't feel the same", she reacted with fucking /horror/ when she saw the crush cuffs) he then had to kiss the girl he had a crush on who just said she didn't like him (What else was he supposed to do when she kissed him??? I can bet that he didn't want to kiss someone that just rejected him) and listen to her go "See? Absolutely nothing there. You felt it too, you didn't feel anything either" Yeah!! No shit sherlock!!! You just rejected him before kissing him without asking if he wanted to!!!

God, Dex deserves so much better and I hate it so much. He deserves to be angry at Sophie, at the world, he deserves to tell Sophie to fuck right off and only make things to help Keefe and Fitz. He deserves to have that moment absolutely ruin his friendship with Sophie because it was absolutely a bitch move of hers and just oh my fucking god Dex would have been sobbing in his room for weeks after that moment

"Best friend" my ass, you barely talk to him unless you need something!! Dex seriously needs some better friends, maybe even a corruption arc to join the neverseen because at least they respect him and appreciate what he can do and actually see him as a person, unlike Sophie "Center of the world" Foster who only thinks of which hot boy she should try out next or that everyone should love her because she's their """""Saviour"""""

God, Sophie sucks so much

I'd rather the series be about the mirroring of Dex and Fitz with them as the two main characters and perspectives we get, they are such interesting characters (Futz with All The Pressure and Dex with Nothing To Lose) and their relationship could even end up romantic as enemies to lovers or "A bit too close to be friends" because Shannon wouldn't write gae

omg thank you I'm glad it made even a smidge of sense 😅

Oh that's right, my bad! Honestly it's been a while since I read the series (I've been thinking abut re-reading but honestly I think I'd rather die than remember how good it used to be and how unnecessarily complicated it is now).

But you're absolutely right. Dex deserved SO much better. Not only was that kiss like, non-consensual, it was really cruel. I bet Dex would've smacked Sophie if he hadn't had his eyes closed (and I would've applauded him). The whole thing was just so wrong.

And I agree, Dex deserves to be angry. Angry at everyone and the world. Especially since Sophie was his first friend and messed it up so bad. What makes me hurt the most for him is that after he got into the "circle" of cool kids, he was part of the fun for a while. He was finally included, for the first time in his "child-of-a-bad-match" life. He was part of something, people liked him. And then slowly they all went away. They left him, and now he sits, alone except for Tinker and his inventions, in a room at Widgetmoor. Hoping and praying that they won't forget him entirely. After all... he was useful to them once. Maybe they'll want him again.

So he sits and works.

Honestly, at this point, a corruption arc would be understandable. It would only be natural, the way they abandoned him once they found cooler, more "useful" people. I sure as heck would be bitter and angry enough to make the Neverseen notice me as a potential member.

But let's be real, the Neverseen would probably do the same thing to Dex as they had to Jolie, to Keefe, to Tam. One wrong move and bam, you're done. Doesn't matter what you brought to the team, if you question, you're out.

Maybe Dex would be too hurt and angry to question. Maybe he'd go completely rogue and want to do anything to get back at the people he'd once called "friends". I can't really see it though. He's always been such a sweet, selfless boy that I really don't see him being completely evil. It would be interesting to see though!

Also interesting would be to see Fitz and Dex as the main characters as you said. I personally don't ship them, (I don't think they have a good dynamic) but I do agree that Fitz with All the Pressure and Dex with Nothing to Lose would be a VERY interesting story!

*whispers* and hey, idk if you like to write, but if you wrote a fanfic along those lines, i'd read it for sure :D

[justice4sasuke]

I know that most of the fandom won't agree with me, but that fight on the hospital rooftop always annoyed me so much!! NARUTO was the one who used a lethal jutsu first, he was the one who decided that using that against a friend was ok bc he was angry, Sasuke just reacted! But like always he is the one blamed for it and Naruto is the poor sadboi who 'just wanted to be acknowledged' uwu.

I don't know why people seem to think they're best friends/family at that point, I'm rereading the manga and I can't seem to find the scenes where this mythical friendship happened? most of the good moments were done by/bc of Sasuke and Naruto was a jealous/confrontational pain in the ass the rest of the time. Sakura is almost a non-entity and Kakashi has purposefully kept his distance from them. If Sasuke wasn't so lonely he wouldn't even have reason to think much about them at all. Most of the teamwork happened bc of Sasuke. But it's still him that is mean for rejecting Sakura(as if he doesn't have a right to not be interested in someone?) while she is meaner as she rejects Naruto on the same page! He is the one 'pushing the team away' when he is the one who initiates all the nice moments and teamwork! He is the one refusing this 'new family' when Kakashi hadn't even told him he had a Sharingan and had maybe some relatable experience! Everyone keeps making fun of his dead clan as if that shit wouldn't hurt, but they 'care' about him?

But who cares, right. Sasuke is still at fault and Naruto is a perfect ray of sunshine and friendship.

(sorry for the rant, I'm just rereading the manga and it's pissing me off again.)

No problem. I agree for the most part. I actually think that hospital roof fight had a lot of potential that was as usual squandered.

Because yeah, Naruto, a dumbass 12 year old who is attention seeking and wants the acknowledgment of the "cool" boy is going to be too dense to realize that whole situation was NOT about him, but about Sasuke feeling ignored, humiliated and retraumatized by Itachi (in favor of the class dunce Naruto!) and the whole thing is just two emotionally stunted kids with no idea what they are doing taking their emotions out on each other. I can get with that. It makes sense. The problem comes when there is no acknowledgment that Naruto's behavior was also wrong and all the blame gets put on Sasuke. Kakashi tells Jiraiya to talk to Naruto but we don't see it happen and there's no real indication that it DID happen. Because in Kishimoto's eyes Sasuke was the real problem and Naruto is just a poor sunshine angel who just wants attention.

[bookofmirth]

Hi! I’m so happy your asks are open again, your always so insightful! The relationship between Feyre and Nesta is seriously complicated and I always found fault on both sides. My biggest problem though is the passive behaviour Feyre had to her mate and the way he treated her sister. If she wanted a big happy family so much but saw the way her mate ostracized her sister, why not tell him off and stick up for her more? He shouldn’t have felt so comfortable with treating her poorly in her presence. Sorry for the longish rant!!

Thank you lovely! Sorry for doing that and then peacing out of tumblr for the weekend hehe

This makes me super angry! Honestly, I know the whole pregnancy thing was a mess and a half, but the way that Rhys interacts with Nesta and Elain has been bothering me for a lot longer, and can potentially have even worse repercussions for their relationship. The way that Cassian felt like he had to choose between Nesta and the IC in acosf? That's what Rhys's behavior is setting up for Feyre in the future, and it isn't going to turn out well for anyone if he insists on making her choose where her loyalties lie.

Rhys has no business putting his nose between the Archeron sisters. Period. It is 100% Feyre's decision how, when, if, where, etc. she wants to talk to Nesta and Elain, to see them, to have a sleepover, to go to therapy - literally EVERYTHING related to Feyre's relationship with her sisters is FEYRE'S BUSI-FUCKING-NESS.

I do think that this precedent was set prior to acosf. The way that Rhys treated Nesta in acosf didn't come from nowhere, it came from Feyre not making that boundary very clear, years ago. Like I remember complaining about this in acofas. I'm sure if I cared about rereading acowar, I would see signs there as well. It's just annoying af, and I have no idea who this Rhys is. It's like when he died and came back, he came back a different person. I blame sjm.

I can understand this in acofas and acosf from Feyre, to an extent, because she is finding her way as a leader and such. But I agree that she needs to be more firm with Rhys and tell him to butt the fuck out of sister business.

[absurdthirst]

I'm feeling a mix of anger and sadness. I've seen people went/rant here, so I guess I just wanted that too. You're always so kind to people and always know just what to say 💜

I was accused of cheating yesterday. Not by my boyfriend, but by his colleague. It's because I have blue eyes (one blue/green, the other blue/grey), my boyfriend has blue and our daughter has hazel eyes.

My Ex cheated on me, so I know how much that hurts, so I could never do that to another person. So it really hurts that someone would think I did, based on eye color.

My boyfriends sister has dark brown eyes, despite all the other siblings having blue eyes as well as their parents (and she is a spitting image of their father, so no denying they're related). So luckily my boyfriend knows it can happen and I explained how recessive genes work. But I can still see the wheels in his head turning, like he actually thinks if its a possibility I cheated.

And it gets worse by the fact that our daughter looks totally like me, so there's barely any of my boyfriend in her. And our son looks completely like his dad (only thing he got from me is my ears. Sorry kiddo), so no one questions his origin.

Fuck I'm so mad at his colleague and I don't know how to defend myself... And honestly don't know what to do... 😓

His colleague is an asshole. Complete and total buttmunch. I'm so sorry that he's putting completely unnecessary conflict on your relationship and potentially on the relationship between your boyfriend and his daughter.

Now, I have a different take on things than some might. You know that your daughter is your boyfriend's, and there is a really easy way to put his mind at ease. Do a DNA test. Or at least offer one.

Some people get really upset at that. And I get why, because it implies that your partner doesn't trust you and that is never a good feeling.

I am of the opinion that offering him the option would do a lot to ease any lingering suspicions he might have and if he does decide to do it, it's something to shove in his asshole colleague's face.

You've got nothing to hide. Again, this is my own ideas coming into play. I'm that 'fuck it, I'll prove it' type of personality. My grandmother, for years, claimed I wasn't my father's because I was conceived out of wedlock. 🙄🙄🙄🙄 Even though I have my father's green eyes. I honestly wished my parents had done it to shut her the fuck up about it. Although my father knew that I was his.

My ex tried to pull the same shit with me (although this was just his own narcissism) and when I told him to do DNA test he shut up about it.

Whatever you decide to do, I am thinking about you hun. You have EVERY right to be angry at your husband's colleague. And you have a right to be disappointed in you boyfriend for entertaining the idea, although that might not be a reality. It might be your own worry making you think that he's questioning it if he hasn't voiced anything out loud.

If it were me, I would bring it up. Tell him that I wanted to do one of those DNA tests and put the entire matter to rest.

[apparentlyaswarmofbees]

Let's kickstart the reopening of requests with some Levi loving moments shall we~

I decided to kind of merge both of them together, I hope it ended good~

Have a good day too~♡

I wrote this while having the newest song from E ve, Aono Waltz on repeat the whole time. It's so good

.

Wave Vortex - A Leviathan x MC mini fic

.

Summary

It happened so fast. Too fast.

If anyone asked Levi if he had ever been in love, he wouldn't miss a beat before replying 'yes'.

.

Warning: uncensored swearing, Leviathan being anxious and insecure af.

.

It was supposed to be a fun evening, he had finally put his foot down on his insecurities and asked his best friend, THE best of friends, to go on a date with him.

And they said yes, hells, they said yes.

He was on cloud nine for the entire week, day and night, during boss fights, anime episodes, even to the point of spacing out inside his fantasies while he was trying to rant to Henry exactly about said fantasies.

He was happy, so damn happy. But he was also scared shitless.

He was just so awkward, he couldn't do anything right except for being an otaku, he was ugly and couldn't even express himself unless he was roleplaying, he just knew he would ruin this, he knew.

But he was just so excited.

And now as he sat on a bench outside the human world Aquarium you two were supposed to be having a fun evening at, he couldn't help but think that he should have cancelled the plans and walked away as soon as he started having bad feelings.

Not that it wasn't fun at the start of course.

He may have had arrived one hour earlier than promised and probably made you feel bad about having him wait though for some reason you arrived only a few minutes after.

"I was just too excited to come" they had said, he knew they had to have known he left earlier and came rushing despise it all, he really is a pain in the ass isn't he?

But even so, the moment he bumped his hands with yours and you took a hold of his pinkie, his brain was mush all over again.

He tried his best to make it fun for you, speaking to every single aquatic life swimming around and translating to you whatever they were thinking.

"Oh... Oh!" He exclaimed

"What is it?" You looked back and forth between the demon and the silver fish staring at you two from the glass "what did it say?"

"I-It likes my eyes" he didn't know how to feel about being complimented by a fish, though Henry did cheer him up whenever he needed.

He could hear you chuckle from besides him and turned his head to look at you (he got a bit startled when he met your gaze, were you looking at him all this time?) "I like them too" you smiled, his eyes widened "your eyes kind of remind me of a sunset".

He was spluttering incoherent noises for a good five minutes after.

You guys even found a little place selling soft ice cream cones, he was a bit excited to find what flavor you would order, maybe next time you two hung out together he could pull one of those date moves and get an ice cream for the both of you...

"...What next time?" Leviathan hunched his back over his legs, hiding his face in his arms. Would there be a next time...?

It was all going so well, even though he was a nervous wreck and couldn't even fully grasp onto his best friend's hand because he was a coward just like that. Even then, even then, he believed the two of you were having enough fun, you told him so, and you were smiling, so at least part of it had to actually be true.

But of course, his younger siblings had to come a ruin everything.

And it happened so fast, too fast.

You asked to try his ice cream, now that he looks back at it, he isn't sure why because you two had gotten the same flavor afterall.

But he didn't think of that at the time and let you take a taste.

And he was just so hipnotized by your lips covered in ice cream, he seriously pondered if this was what Beel felt like while looking at food. That little smile, the small lap of your tongue as you cleaned the skin off the cold treat, and missing a spot.

He was going insane.

And that's when it happened.

"Just kiss already dammit!" Came a loud scream from not so far behind him.

It was familiar and high pitched, Asmo, and followed by a second familiar voice, Satan, telling the other to not yell.

But it was too late. The damage was already done.

The moment the lust sibling had finished his line the ice cream cone Leviathan was holding out for you fell off his hands in a jerk motion as he jumped.

Spilling all over your chin, neck and clothes.

Clothes you had specifically told him were your favorite and you had specifically dressed with because you spe cifically told him you also wanted today to be special.

Fuck

Fuck

"Fuck!" He exclaimed right there and then.

You looked down at yourself, mouth agape.

He couldn't stay there. He had to get away, away before you got angry, away before you officially declared all his hopes for naught.

And that's how he found himself trying to not have a full blown panic attack on the pretty damn unconfortable bench he found his sorry ass seated upon outside of the hellhole his brothers and their human housemate found themselves in. Well deserved for someone like him right?

Now that he thinks about it, he should have stayed and helped you clean up right?

"Fuck" he groaned before raising his head to prevent the tears gathering around his eyes to spill out.

He really just had to make a big deal out of everything and ruin it didn't he?

Why was he always like this?

"Levi!" Oh sweet lord of shadows he almost jumped out of his skin again, it was you. And you were running towards him.

He debated to himself if he should run away or stay, deciding that he already ruined things enough by not helping you clean up, he should start apologizing, maybe that will make you less angry-

He stood up, he couldn't make his feet move towards you but he was ready to speak, he could try to do damage control, he could do it.

He opened his mouth to speak but you were faster, you always were.

"Are you okay?"

And he felt so stupid all of sudden.

You weren't angry, you were concerned.

You shirt was clean though he could see it was still wet, why weren't you angry?

Well, he already knew the answer.

Because it was you.

You understood him, you knew he was already on a peak of anxiety the moment he asked you on a date a week ago, you knew him.

You knew him.

And so he couldn't help but start crying.

But this time he didn't hide, he didn't run. This time he reached for your hand first, this time he held onto it fully, this time he really looked at you.

"It's okay! I'm not angry!" He was making you even more worried and you didn't know if you should touch him or not "you're much more important than my favorite clothes! Well, it is still going to be a pain to wash it though-" he kind of wanted to let out a defeated laugh at that.

"I knoooow" he said in between tears. "I'm sorryyy"

He heard you sigh "I know" of course you did "and I forgive you" of course you did "and the day is not over yet, we can still do something fun today!" You paused, looking down, almost skepish "and I want to spend more time with you", he held his breath.

Of course you did.

"I'm sorry I didn't stay to help you clean" he finally let out in a husky voice. He wanted to blame Asmo, be angry at him for startling him in the first place, but either way he shouldn't have left you alone "if it stains I can try to find some kind of spell to get it off"

He looked down to his feet, his hand was still holding onto yours tightly.

You were quiet for a while, he was about to look back up when you did the job for him by lifting it up by his chin with your hand gently.

And you kissed him.

Deeply yet softly, gently yet passionatelly.

He didn't know what he was expecting but it definetelly wasn't this.

You cupped one of his cheeks with your free hand, his face stunned, but at least the tears stopped coming.

"I do love you Leviathan" was all that scaped those lips he was already starting to miss.

If anyone asked Levi if he had ever been in love, he wouldn't miss a beat before replying 'yes'.

Afterall he loved a lot of things: He loved his animes, he loved his games, he loved Henry and he loved his waifus and husbandos. He loved many things but, none of those things could ever reciprocate his feelings, not really.

And he was used to it, he was used to loving without being loved, it was safer, better, free of potential rejection.

But you loved him.

Even after so many times he ranted your ear off about something you probably weren't interested in, even after not being able to fully help when you felt bad other than keeping you company and entertained, even after he has proven himself to be too much of a coward to be fully honest with his feelings but still too stubborn to fully give up on them, even after he ruined your favorite clothes and left you alone to clean it up.

He really needed to step up in his game huh?

He felt his face burn and his heart burst, he wanted to look away from your eyes but couldn't.

Leviathan really did love a lot of things.

"I... I do, I love you too"

And one of those things was definetelly you.

[hiraya-rawr]

I know im late cuz my modules and allergies are going to be the death of me but it makes me feel so irritated, angry even, that there are still people like that who thinks that girls can't handle anything other than taking care of the house, not only that they had the audacity to say it to you on your special day!

I had the same experience at school but it's not about capabilities but it's about how I should act. A male teacher would always comment on my laugh saying that it's ugly and sound like an animal dying and began to show me what a real lady's laugh sounds like (the old-fashioned laugh one), i just nod and went on my day, still using the laughing that he called ugly.

That same teacher would also say disgusting things about how girls should dress, like if we show any skin, that means we are inviting men, the same goes to necklaces like choker because he told us when girls wear chokers that means we want to have it.

Oh, I'm sorry I'm ranting here. But I just wanna say is ignore that person who said that to you, because just because you are a girl doesn't mean you are not capable of anything. We have different strengths and capabilities, same goes to boys.

I hope i didn't take up too much of your time but here, have a hug 🤗 and flowers 💐. Hope you doing alright and don't let that man's words say to you. Take care hira 💓

hnsixjdjdjjdd thank you trimisuuu 🥺💗��� lots of hugs!!! yes I'm doing much better now that my emotional baggage and school baggage are settling down hahahahh

and you're so right! in the end, they're the ones missing out by not recognizing peoples potential just because they're so fixated on gender! 😤 eff all of them, they suck

[postmodernmulticoloredcloak]

I love the purgatory prayer for the Emotions and acting choices. But at the same time, I'm really bothered by the implications that it was wrong and unreasonable of Dean to be upset about his mother's death and he should apologise for that. I mean, apologising for your behaviour is great, but that's his mom, and Cas did fuck up in this situation, Dean had every right to be pissed! Esp since it all really happened not so long ago.

Idk, that's probably my problem with the whole Beren's anger arc in s13-15: they repeatedly gave Dean very good reasons for anger (bc he's still a protagonist), but then turned around and acted like he's crazy for expressing or even feeling it. It just doesn't sit right with me. Also, it felt kind of redundant after the MoC plot, which was also about Dean's rage. And tbh, to me, MoC storyline handled this theme (for the most part) better.

Sorry for ranting in your ask box, you are my fave meta writer in this fandom, and it's always interesting to see your pov on different aspects of the show.

Thank you ^-^

I agree! It’s actually curious that you bring up the MoC arc because earlier I was thinking about it... That was different, because the “rage” was programmaticly trauma. In the Carver era Dean’s mirrors are characters like Claire, Amara, characters who lash out from a place of pain and betrayal. That was clear and intentional.

The narrative drastically shifted at a certain point from “the MoC draws from your inner darkness” (which was more in line with the “dark variation on fantasy” thing they played with back then) to “the MoC draws from the Darkness” but at the end of the day it doesn’t really change much, because Dean and Amara are the same. In Supernatural’s horror variation on the fantasy classic, there’s no clear lines drawn between who’s Frodo and who’s Gollum and who’s the Ring, because there’s no magical source of evil, but evil is trauma. (But Dean is definitely Frodo, who gets his return to the Shire at the end that he can never quite enjoy because everything’s changed - I’m pretty sure it was planned all along that Mary wouldn’t be The Perfect Mother, because she was supposed to be Frodo’s return home, things can never be the same after the journey. But I don’t think Mary was supposed to just get killed like that.)

The Jack arc feels different because Dean also lashes out from pain and trauma, but somehow the narrative is not compassionate to him. The narrative of the Carver is kind to Dean, it gives him the return home at the end.

Now, people have been making jokes and memes about Dean in the Jack arc - how he was basically the man resentful at the child for killing the wife in childbirth, how he was “baby trapped”, how he and Cas were respectively husband-coded and wife-coded... well, that’s not an incorrect assessment...? Dean was painted as an angry man, you know? Not as a villain, of course, because it was still acknowledged that his anger came from a place of pain and trauma, but in a way where he cannot understand his feelings and doesn’t really have much to write home about in the emotional intelligence department.

The Carver era painted Dean as a wronged woman in pain slash Frodo who thinks he’s Gollum or even the Ring itself, the last seasons painted Dean as an angry man who somewhat can’t recognize that anger comes from trauma. (I’ve always said that the tragedy of Dean is that Dean is aware. And the tragedy comes from the helplessness. That’s how I read him, at least.)

Obviously not all writers write Dean the same which results in a picture more complex than this, but this at least is the general gist of it, imo. Or, at least, this is one side of the issue.

The other side of the issue, as you point out, is that the narrative doesn’t seem to allow Dean his feelings. I don’t know if it’s a reaction to the Carver’s era tendency to write Sam as vaguely unsympathetic and Cas as chronically suffering from bad decision syndrome, but possibly - Sam is now the sympathetic one (at least in theory, because Dean always defies intentions...) and Cas is Definitely Taking The Right Decisions. So everything regarding Jack is The Right Decision, because Jack Is Good And Will Save The World, and Dean... Dean is chronically wrong and an ass because he doesn’t quite jump on the wagon. (Despite being cool with getting on the wagon on his own terms, based on his own assessments.)

Jack is repeatedly shown as naive and dangerously easy to manipulate for the wrong things, and hardly in control of his hyper-powerful powers, but if Dean expresses reservations then he’s chastized for it, despite having all the reasons to be terrified of what Jack can potentially do.

But first Sam projects himself on Jack (and when that happens there’s no escape from it, Dean is the asshole ¯\_(ツ)_/¯) and then Cas is Totally Right This Time, so Dean should not be a dick and definitely should not experience grief and trauma in ways we don’t like. Only Good(TM) trauma survivors allowed.

[mantra4ia]

Debris 1x13 "Celestial Body": rewatch Reaction'd, questions and comments

So if all those people are experiencing emotional convergence, who are they converging from? Who's sending the emotional signal that the debris is channeling, or is it the debris manifesting it's "consciousness" in a way that we can understand it by way of human conduits?

Maddox is clearly trading debris pieces with Irina (perhaps the piece that he took out of storage off the books), and Irina is on the phone with presumably her handler/ boss to negotiate this trade. She gives him lateral (which I assume means latitudinal) readings and then he asks for longitudinal readings which we don't get to hear. They are: Lateral 105, 112, 115, 120, 113, 110, 109

What's the significance of these measures? Latitude goes from 0° to 90° from the equator, so that doesn't track unless the scene is cut wrong and they're meant to be longitudinal (E/W) readings, which go to 180° relative to the prime meridian. That would make more sense, because after Irina is done with the first set of readings, the unknown caller on the phone says "drop to level two for vertical" and latitudes are North/South.

If we're talking Western longitudes, notable landmarks include: Denver, Salt Lake City UT / Phoenix AZ / nearly Sedona AZ - aka where the telesphere went, Las Vegas, Lake Tahoe/ Nevada border, Great Salt Lake, Alberta-Saskatchewan border, and the Utah-Arizona border.

Or perhaps they're not part of terrestrial measurement at all. The act of "lateral reading" could just mean verifying your sources/accuracy as you go, where as vertical reading is reading for content first to see if something is worth evaluating for sources.

However, if they are part of coordinates, then is the fragment that Maddox is trading with Irina a legitimate "mapmaker" piece like George previously said Influx was seeking? Ya know, when he lied to his daughter. Can a mapmaker piece track moving/animate debris akin to the telesphere? Are those black dust cloud beings George is running from made up of animate debris?

Bryan: After becoming a parent you're in a heightened emotional state, emotionally raw.

George: Higher highs, lower lows, the joy of having a child, the postpartum depression, and the fear of getting it wrong.

Me: Are we in a pensive, self-reflective mood, George? Are you practicing your pub trivia Bryan, delivering exposition, or are you speaking from personal character experience? Seriously, how would you know?!

John Noble as Otto, man why does he always make such a good villain?

What is with the cryptic vagueness when Maddox tells Irina, "You know I can't let you leave with that case right? I mean you know that. There's another door for you Irina, one that only you can go through." They seemed almost on good terms in a previous episode, like friends or something more in a past life "nice car, i almost left / no you didn't", he wouldn't kill her, would he? Or is it more like a code between them, a sort of "I'm being watched, take the back exit"?

Hey, so why is it that sometimes George's eye seems opaque and damaged from the debris implant, but then when he's talking to Finola after he distracts Bryan while being Debris whisperer, his eye seems fine? PS: I googled Tyrone Benskin just to see what he looks like when he's not playing George Jones and I didn't know he's a former member of Canadian Parliament. Don't trust the government, eh?

George: "You're such a compassionate person, you always have been. So much of your mother in you." That's the second time that Finola's mother has been mentioned in the series, back from the pilot. Is it a coincidence that the first piece of debris that chose to interact with Finola resonated her mom? More than just Finola's desire being reflected by the debris, but the debris emoting it's first impression of her as someone compassionate that it can trust?

It also raises my heckles that George repeats, almost word for word, something that Finola said in episode 3. "If we can't help people, we do not deserve this debris / if we don't use this debris on these people, we are not worthy to have it." Are father and daughter that ideologically similar, or has he been spying on her progress this whole time, or both?

George: "I took my life to allow myself a rebirth, I paid the price. I want you to know that not one day goes by that I don't think of you and your sister. I want you to know this." This coincides with my initial impression that George staged his death to get away from Orbital after he assessed how his research was being used/abused.

George: "You never wanted to go into the pool, I had to throw you in, and you kicked and screamed, but you always did better that way." Immabout to throw you George, just keep talking!!!! I'm sorry, this charicature of absentee father reminiscing about the good old days really ticks me off from personal experience.

Also, as a person with a disability, I am not particularly pleased with the use of Dario as a plot device instead of a thoughtful character with a backstory at this point in the show for 13 whole episodes now. Pretty pissed off actually, so they better do something phenomenal and pivotal with Christian Rose (Dario) in season 2 [maybe have his character interact with debris in a similar way to Caroline]. But that's another rant about ableism in screenwriting for another angry day....

George: "A telesphere was born yesterday. It came from a pocket dimension inside Orbital. I think it's birth may have triggered the debris." This is perhaps the one-ish episode that I find George remotely interesting and also infuriating, particularly because of the way he speaks, like he's finally taken off the guise of the old, well-meaning eccentric and turned into a sharp, cunning, and at times calculatingly ruthless individual. I find it peculiar that he says a telesphere is born. Makes me think that the debris is not just part of a spacecraft, but a hybrid of the beings piloting that craft.

I get tremendous satisfaction from Finola head-butting people. This should continue.

I'm not familiar with all of the work of JH Wyman to know if this is a running theme or an ongoing joke. But does he keep his writing staff in a constant state of starvation? Is that why pieces of debris are called "Nachos", and why Influx has "Beans" to shield them from debris side effects, and why Bryan is always eating junk food? Should I be worried about the writer's room and start sending them healthy snacks?!? Just give me an SOS in the credit roll.

Speaking of: is the "Bean" that Finola ingested a piece of debris? Similar to the pieces of debris that fused with Anson Ash? Will it impart some physical benefits to her moving forward?

"I won't lose you again...you belong with me." What are you talking about George Jones, you made the conscious decision to leave your family. You didn't lose Finola, she lost you. In this version of reality at least. Or (unscripted backstory) did Jones and his wife separate prior to her death / was Finola brought up mostly by her mother? That doesn't seem the case if she was buying her father birthday presents and took it upon herself to settle his affairs after his death.

Why do the Influx Operatives Otto and Anson have tattoos on their hands, but not Loeb? Is he like the low end of the totem pole FNG who hasn't earned his stripes, hence why Otto gives him s***: aka "Careful you cretin. All the finesse of a butcher."

What is the hierarchy of Influx anyway? Despite being an anti-government "for the people/ elevate the human consciousness" organization they do still seem to have a governing hierarchy and Otto and George seem to be on the same level, pretty high in rank / they talk with confidence to each other like they go back a while.

What is that weird thing that Otto does with his hands to Bryan's head? What are all the weird things Otto does, including his massacre at the petrol station? Ick.

Why is it that Leob and George are freaked out by the black smoke (debris particle?) man, but Anson and Otto aren't? They seem to see them(?), but don't overtly react.

Bryan: "It seems like we're entering some kind of new phase." Gee where have I heard that one before? Oh yeah, the story of "Blackwater grandfather" and the black wind that they're still teasing endlessly while refusing to tether it into some kind of world building lore. Agggghh!

Lololol, Bryan and Finola's dynamic even in the midst of a very serious episode makes me laugh. "Devon Reese / two e's? / Two e's!" "This one smells like baby diapers. Almost as bad as the tech section of the plane/ You mean your section of the plane. / Almost." That zinger 👍

Paraphrasing Bryan: "[recapping, recap, and did I mention recap]...something about George doesn't feel right." Personal pet peeve: I HATE IT when episodes have intentional explanatory lines like this to point out the fact that we as audience are privy to information that the main characters aren't. Not only does it make the main characters seem less intelligent, it breaks the fourth wall a little bit and gives the impression that the audience, which is ahead of the plot, is not as intelligent and needs a reminder that we're ahead. Lackadaisical writing drives me nuts!!! I can't outright say that it's "bad" dialogue, but it's not a choice I would make if I wanted uninterrupted viewer immersion.

Finola: "My instincts are good" Me: You are an emotionally intelligent decision maker with gaping personal blind spots.

George: You belong with me, your father.

Finola: My father died six months ago, and you are not him.

Me: Chef's kiss 👏👏👏

Otto: "It would never have worked out with that girl [Finola], not in any iteration." Definitely makes me lean towards the fan theory that the alt!Finola in (presumably) suspensia in Sedona Arizona got plucked from another reality.

Surprisingly, the ending credit roll has no voiceover as all the previous episodes of the season have. Disappointed that there's no potential teaser to a season 2 if the show gets renewed. But I find it curious that the extras who were demonstrating emotional convergence were credited as: chess board persons. Not sure if that's relevant, but I definitely feel like this show is playing games with me and my emotions.