#sorry for my rambling i just love my family so much
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anonymousewrites · 2 days ago
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A Not-So-Disastrous Romance (Book 2) Chapter Sixteen
Saiki Kusuo x Reader
Chapter Sixteen: Teruhashi's Tears and Rifuta's Crush
Summary: Teruhashi comes over and interrupts Saiki's New Year, but somehow she isn't the worst guest that comes. Also, (Y/N)'s hypothesis is spot-on about Rifuta.
            Mr. and Mrs. Saiki laughed as (Y/N) told them about one of the many (unfortunate) adventures they had been on with Saiki—this time a tale of the karaoke party where Saiki had to end up performing. Ordinarily, he wouldn’t want his parents to know he’d done something so public since it would encourage them to bother him to do stupid stuff in front of people, but it was a fond memory since (Y/N) had been there, taken most of the attention, and made the entire thing worth it. So, he let (Y/N) continue as they beamed when they remembered dancing around and pretended to do it again. All-in-all, this was turning out to be a perfect New Year’s Day.
            Alright, I’ve got the plan! I casually tell him Happy New Year, and then when I mention the festival, he’ll want to come along!
            Saiki’s mood darkened. Of course Teruhashi was already here to bother him on a lovely day. So, to stop her from interrupting, he grabbed onto the doorbell of his house with his psychic abilities and smothered the sound of it.
            There. No ruining my day.
            “Hey, can I help you?”
            Saiki jerked as he heard a voice speaking to Teruhashi. He hadn’t heard any other thoughts approaching, and the voice—
            Him!
            “What’s wrong, Kusuo?” asked (Y/N), noticing Saiki’s tiny change in mood.
            There was a knock at the door, and Mrs. Saiki stood. She peered out the window and beamed.
            “It’s Kusuke and Kokomi!” she said. “What a lovely surprise.”
            Oh, that explains his mood, thought (Y/N), smothering a little chuckle. Saiki saw their amusement and scowled—though there was no real malice. (Y/N) chuckled and patted his hand. “We’ll deal with it.”
            “Don’t let them in,” said Saiki as his mom headed to the door, but she was already opening the door.
            “Welcome in!” she said, beaming. “Oh, Kusuke, you’re home!”
            “Mom, it’s been a while,” said Kusuke, smiling.
            “Happy New Year,” greeted Teruhashi politely. She saw (Y/N) and started slightly. “Oh, (Y/N). You’re here?”
            Fortunately for Teruhashi, there was no annoyance at seeing them. They were friends, and that friendship meant Teruhashi’s inevitable jealousy at not getting Saiki alone was dampened. (And that was fortunate for Teruhashi because bad thoughts about (Y/N) meant getting onto Saiki’s bad side).
            “My parents are out of town on a work trip,” said (Y/N), smiling. “The Saikis were nice enough to invite me over.”
            That was the complete truth, they merely left out that Mrs. Saiki had also rambled about how “if (Y/N)’s family wasn’t going to take care of them as a family, then they were going to be part of the Saiki family, and Kusuo should get a move on and make sure they never leave because they’re just too sweet and—” (and so on and so forth).
            “When are your parents actually at the house?” said Saiki.
            (Y/N) shrugged. They were pretty much used to living independently at this point.
            “Wait, do you two know each other?” said Mr. Saiki, looking between Teruhashi and Kusuke.
            “She was ringing the doorbell, so I brought her in,” said Kusuke. His intelligence had just known it would irritate Saiki.
            “The doorbell?” said Mr. Saiki.
            “Oh, my, I’m so sorry, I didn’t hear it!” said Mrs. Saiki.
            (Y/N) raised an eyebrow at Saiki. He looked away, and they tutted.
            This is a huge revelation! I had no idea Saiki had an older brother! thought Teruhashi. But I don’t really like his type…Speaking of siblings “Is Kuriko here today?”
            “What?” said Saiki’s parents.
            Oh, right. Saiki had forgotten about his feminine name. I pretended to by my own sister, who doesn’t exist. I have to let them know.
            “Kuriko?” said Mrs. Saiki, frowning.
            “Oh, right, kuriko!” Mr. Saiki grabbed something from the kitchen—literal kuriko. “Here is kuriko for you.”
            That’s kuri chestnut paste.
            “No, I mean Saiki’s sister,” said Teruhashi. She looked at (Y/N). “You met her.”
            “Right,” said (Y/N), smiling. “Isn’t it amazing how similar she and Kusuo look? Especially since their brother—”
            “You can call me Kusuke,” said Kusuke.
            “No.” Saiki didn’t need him being familiar or friendly with his partner.
            “—looks so different with the blonde hair. Kuriko and Kusuo both have pink,” said (Y/N).
            “That’s true,” said Teruhashi, smiling.
            Good clue, thought Saiki. Hopefully his parents would get the hint.
            “I don’t know any Kur—Mm!”
            Kusuke shoved the kuri chestnut paste into his dad’s mouth and smiled. “Oh, of course! Our sister, Kuriko.” Of course the genius had figured the plot out. “She’s abroad right now, like I was. You know her?”
            “Oh, really?” said Mr. Saiki, still a little confused but starting to get it.
            “I do,” said Teruhashi.
            Unbelievable, thought Saiki.
            “Which country did she go to?” asked Teruhashi.
            “Paraguay,” said Mr. Saiki.
            “Paraguay?” said Teruhashi, amazed.
            “Shut up,” said Saiki to Mr. Saiki.
            “Kusuo, I have a present for you!” said Kusuke, successfully changing the subject (not that a “gift” from Kusuke would be much better than the present conversation). “I have one for you, too, (Y/N)!” He held up envelopes.
            Never mind, this is good. Saiki could see the money inside with his x-ray vision.
            “Oh, I can’t accept that,” said (Y/N), waving their hands.
            Teruhashi glanced between (Y/N) and the envelope. Saiki’s brother prepared a gift for them? That’s very close…
            “Well, you are Kusuo’s pa—”
            “Pal!” interrupted (Y/N) before Kusuke could blurt out the word “partner.” Embarrassed, they took the enveloped and bowed. “Thank you!”
            Close one… (Y/N) and Saiki breathed a sigh of relief.
            We need to get out of here, thought Saiki. He tapped (Y/N) on the shoulder and gestured to the door.
            They nodded and grabbed their coat—pink with hearts embroidered on the pockets. They headed towards the door, and Saiki pulled on his boots.
            “We should invite Kokomi,” whispered (Y/N).
            “No,” said Saiki. He wanted a nice moment with (Y/N).
            “She and Kusuke with each other is going to be a problem,” pointed out (Y/N).
            Saiki hated they were right. “Fine, but then we go out the two of us.”
            “Of course,” said (Y/N), kissing Saiki’s cheek before going back to the living room to invite Kokomi.
            Saiki let out a little sigh. Oh, wow. He’d never get tired of their affection.
l
            This is the worst-case scenario. Saiki glared ahead of himself as Kusuke walked through the crowd with them.
            Why is his brother tagging along? Teruhashi had deflated. With (Y/N) at least that was a friend and she could still have a moment with Saiki—Not happening—but with Kusuke, that was going to be weird.
            I should have known Kusuke would tag along, thought (Y/N). The genius had known what would annoy Saiki.
            I need to get out of here with (Y/N), decided Saiki. Risking Teruhashi and Kusuke interacting was fine—he was too tired to care.
            “By the way, do you have a crush on Kusuo?” said Kusuke, turning around with an “innocent” smile. He looked directly at Teruhashi.
            Her face promptly turned several shades of red, and she coughed. “You shouldn’t embarrass Saiki like that!” she said nervously. “And we’re just friends! It’s nothing more!”
            “Oh, good,” said Kusuke.
            He knows she’s lying. (Y/N) and Saiki exchanged a worried glance.
            I knew I wouldn’t like him, thought Teruhashi.
            “I mean, you obviously don’t have anything in common,” said Kusuke, still with that “innocent” smile. “You’re different as night and day.”
            “What?” said Teruhashi. “Saiki and I have plenty—”
            “What are you saying?” Kusuke’s smile had dropped, and he looked at her coldly.
            “What?” said Teruhashi.
            “I can see through you. You’re not worthy of Kusuo,” said Kusuke.
            Teruhashi froze. No one had ever spoken to her like that.
            “You thought you could fool me?” said Kusuke. “Well, it’s to be expected. You probably have been pampered your whole life because of your looks. But Kusuo is on a different level.”
            “Hey!” said (Y/N), glaring at him. “Leave Kokomi alone!” Even if they knew Teruhashi didn’t have a chance with Saiki, Kusuke was just being mean.
            I realize now why I don’t like this guy, thought Teruhashi, staring at Kusuke with wide, shocked eyes. He hasn’t gasped even once since meeting me. There’s never been anyone who wasn’t interested in me.
            “Come on, Kokomi. Let’s leave this jerk,” said (Y/N), taking Teruhashi’s hand. Kusuke had been unnecessarily cruel, and (Y/N) wasn’t going to stand around while their friend was hurt.
            “Don’t look at me like that, Kusuo,” said Kusuke as Saiki glared. “I was just teasing her. We both know only one person is worthy of you, and that’s because they aren’t shallow and have some real spirit! They stand up to everyone! That’s some real power against a monster like you.”
            Saiki ignored the insults directed at him and the compliments towards (Y/N). (He wasn’t sure whether to be pleased that his entire family liked (Y/N) or irritated that even his annoying brother liked them).
            “Kokomi?” said (Y/N), gazing at their friend in worry. They still held her hand.
            I’ve never felt such shame. I won’t forgive him! declared Teruhashi. She sniffled, and a tear fell. “I—I never meant to—”
            “Sorry, I know you’re a talented actress, too,” said Kusuke, looking past the crying. But everyone else was glaring at him as the crowd noticed the perfect pretty girl crying. “What’s going on? These people are surrounding us.”
            “They’re surrounding you. Not us,” said Saiki, taking (Y/N)’s hand and pulling them back as the crowd advanced on Kusuke.
            My secret pretty girl technique, Angel Tears! thought Teruhashi.
            “Who do you think you are?!” shouted the crowd. “You made Teruhashi cry!” They rushed Kusuke.
            “Are these all her boyfriends?” he remarked.
            “We’ll bash your head in!” cried the crowd.
            “Kusuo? (Y/N)?” Kusuke sweat-dropped and looked at them.
            “What do you want us to do?” said Saiki, deadpan.
            “Get him!” The crowd jumped onto Kusuke.
            “Wow, he was defeated by Kokomi,” said (Y/N), impressed.
            “And there’s a perfect distraction.” Saiki pulled (Y/N) through the crowd as Teruhashi watched her “hard work” proudly.
            “Shouldn’t we be worried about Kusuke?” said (Y/N), looking back at the crowd.
            “He’ll be fine. He always has a plan,” said Saiki.
            “Fair enough,” chuckled (Y/N). “And he does deserve a little bit of fear for being so mean.”
            Saiki smirked. He agreed. And, now, as he pulled (Y/N) far away from Teruhashi and her fans, he could really enjoy the New Year Festival. With (Y/N) and only (Y/N).
            “We should go on the Ferris Wheel,” said (Y/N) excitedly, squeezing his hand.
            “Okay.” Anything they wanted, they were getting.
            And so, he let them lead him to the line and watched them grin out the window of the compartment all the way to the top. (Y/N) smiled as they saw the city spread out before them, all the people small and faraway.
            “So pretty,” they said, smiling.
            “Very,” agreed Saiki. But he wasn’t looking at the view. No, he was looking at the smile on (Y/N)’s face. And, unable to help himself—why would he when they looked so handsome in the golden light of the sun—he leaned and kissed their cheek.
            (Y/N)’s cheeks warmed, they turned towards him, and, before he could pull back, (Y/N) kissed him. Saiki happily kissed back.
            A perfect New Years.
            What could be better than this?
l
            “We have a problem,” said Saiki as the lunch bell rang.
            “Huh?” said (Y/N). “Are you alright?”
            “Rifuta is going to try to confess to me,” said Saiki.
            “Uh-oh,” said (Y/N). They had forgotten about Rifuta developing a crush on Saiki (though they also knew that Rifuta 100% also had a crush on Teruhashi and was a bit confused).
            “Let’s leave to eat lunch before she gets here,” said Saiki.
            “Got it,” said (Y/N), grabbing their bento box and following Saiki out. They took the long way around the school and headed to the yard. There were too many people around for Rifuta to confess, so that was good.
            “I’ve been using my telepathy to give her dreams so that she hates me, but it’s not working,” said Saiki.
            “She and Kokomi are very single-minded,” said (Y/N). They paused. “But I think that Rifuta is just a bit confused. Maybe if you get her to realize she’s head-over-heels for Kokomi more than she is for you, that’ll help?”
            “…She’d hate me for Teruhashi liking me, and then my reputation would be ruined,” said Saiki.
            “Fair point.” (Y/N) winced. They’d seen Kusuke get dragged away by people who were angry that Teruhashi was upset, and they didn’t want to see what would happen to Saiki if he upset Rifuta—it wouldn’t be as bad as upsetting Teruhashi, but it wasn’t preferable. “So what do we do?”
            “I don’t know,” said Saiki.
            “…What if we acted closer?” said (Y/N).
            Saiki looked at them. “What?”
            “If Rifuta thinks you’re dating someone, she’ll back off. She’s just competing with Teruhashi, not really interested in you, so it could help,” said (Y/N). They waved their hands. “I-It doesn’t have to be me so it’s not obvious we’re really dating, we can get Miko or something, but it’s just an idea—”
            “Let’s do it.” Saiki was desperate to get Rifuta off his back, and maybe being unavailable would explain his “unbelievable” disinterest in Rifuta.
            “Okay, I’ll text Miko—”
            “No, you and me.”
            “Are you sure? If she really believes we’re dating, that’s another person finding out,” said (Y/N). “And it could get out that we’re dating—”
            “If it does, it does. It has to happen at some point,” said Saiki.
The blowback from Teruhashi and the craziness of people finding out would be troublesome, but if it meant just being himself with (Y/N), in public, then he was fine with it. (Y/N) and Saiki both knew their relationship as their business and no one else’s, but they supposed it would have to happen at some point.
            Plus, this could begin to get the idea of them dating into people’s heads so when it finally came out it made a sense. It eased people into it so they didn’t freak. (Honestly, it was fairly obvious to the audience that they liked one another, so why wouldn’t it be for people in the story?)
            “Okay,” said (Y/N). “Then we’ll act affectionate to get Rifuta to realize you’re not interested for a real reason.”
            Saiki nodded.
l
            (Y/N) counted to ten as Saiki entered the lobby of the school to get his shoes. Rifuta was waiting for him, and he had walked right by her. Now it was their turn. They were a little giddy at the idea of being affectionate with Saiki in public. They weren’t a huge PDA person, and they didn’t care about people knowing they were dating—they didn’t act much differently than they had before except for being sweeter and kissing—but this was still fun.
            Alright. Here we go.
            “Kusuo!” (Y/N) smiled as they rounded the corner and walked up to Saiki. They took his hand. “Are you ready to go out?” They leaned in, their head on his shoulder.
            “What?” Rifuta couldn’t help but speak aloud as she stared at the sight. He’s got a partner?! Really? No way!
            “I am,” said Saiki, brushing their hair from their face affectionately. “Let’s go.”
            “Saiki! Is that your partner?” said Rifuta, getting right to it. Her hands were on her hips as she looked between the pair.
            Didn’t expect her to be so direct. I guess someone else is really finding out today.
            “I am,” said (Y/N), smiling.
            “Your Teruhashi’s friend and are dating him?” said Rifuta, hands on her hips.
            “Hm? What does Teruhashi have to do with who’s dating him?” said (Y/N), tilting their head in “confusion.”
            They don’t know Teruhashi likes him?! Oh, no! How will Teruhashi feel?!
            Saiki heard Rifuta’s thoughts and blinked. (Y/N)’s analysis of a suppressed crush on Teruhashi was correct.
            “W-Well, uh, doesn’t your friend know?” said Rifuta, trying to cover.
            “I think relationships are very private. Don’t you?” said (Y/N), smiling and friendly as ever.
            “I, uh, I guess—” Rifuta was growing confused by her worry for Teruhashi and how to react to (Y/N) still being sweet as usual. No thoughts of liking Saiki herself came to her mind—Saiki was pleased by that. I don’t feel jealousy, hate, or anything. Weird. I’m just confused. I guess I don’t like him after all?
            Looks like it went well, thought Saiki.
            But then why do I still feel so upset? Why does my stomach hurt? Why do I keep thinking about how Teruhashi will react to this? thought Rifuta.
            “Uh, oh, Kusuo, Kokomi’s coming,” said (Y/N), seeing a glow appearing at the end of the hall. “I don’t think we can risk her finding out.” Her crush was still so steady that the blowback to their friendship would be horrendous.
            Oh, no! Teruhashi is coming! She’ll see them together! I have to do something!
            What?
            Rifuta shoved (Y/N) and Saiki forward, and they stumbled into the storage closet. She slammed it closed behind them and stood in front.
            …Huh?
            I did not see that coming.
            “Oh, Imu!” said Teruhashi, spotting her friend. “Long time no see.”
            “Y-Yes,” said Rifuta, growing nervous.
            “What’s was that?” whispered (Y/N), looking at Saiki.
            “I don’t know.” He supported himself by his arms, but they were still incredibly close in the cramped closet. “Ask the girl who shoved us in here.”
            “Are you on your way home?” said Teruhashi, smiling.
            “Yes, I’ll be leaving soon, too,” said Rifuta. Why did I cover for them? Because she would be sad if she saw?
            “Let’s go home together!” Teruhashi grinned and linked her arm with Rifuta’s.
            Rifuta blushed, and her heart pounded. She’s so close! Wow! Shaking her head, she pulled away. No, no way! If you think everything is fine, you’re mistaken! She steeled herself and looked at Teruhashi. “Do you like Saiki, Teruhashi?” If she admits she likes him, I’ll open the door and show her! I’ll make you cry your eyes out!
            Saiki and (Y/N)’s eyes widened. If they were found like this and their relationship came out—Oh, boy. Teruhashi would be upset, and they’d be hunted down for the rest of their days.
            Nervously, Teruhashi blushed. “Y-yes. I’ve never really liked a boy before, so I’m not sure, but I think I do.”
            “Why? Was it love at first sight?” said Rifuta.
            “No. I was the opposite,” said Teruhashi. “At first, I didn’t like how he was never attracted to me. I was so angry with him that I couldn’t stop thinking about him.”
            I see. I get it now, thought Rifuta.
            I knew it was the idea of someone not treating her as a pretty thing to look at, thought (Y/N). Teruhashi needed to be valued as more than her looks, and Saiki was the first person to look at her without paying attention to her appearance, which was attractive to her.
            Teruhashi! I love you! Rifuta hugged Teruhashi suddenly.
            “Not what I expected,” murmured Saiki.
            “Huh?” said (Y/N).
            “She loves Teruhashi,” said Saiki. “You were right.”
            I’ll never beat her beauty and kindness! Rifuta held Teruhashi close.
            “What’s going on, Imu?” asked Teruhashi, confused.
            I’m so hopeless! I love her! Rifuta smiled with a wide smile.
            “I knew it,” asid (Y/N), smiling.
            “What’s the matter?” asked Teruhashi.
            I felt such anger because Saiki didn’t choose Teruhashi, but now I’m so relieved you weren’t taken from me. “I’m rooting for you!” said Rifuta. Even if she was lying a bit, she wanted Teruhashi to be in a fulfilling relationship. “I want you to be happy!”
            “What’s gotten into you?” asked Teruhashi, worried at the sudden change in attitude.
            “This is so much worse,” said Saiki.
            “It’s nothing. Let’s go home together,” said Rifuta.
            “She’s going to help Teruhashi,” groaned Saiki as Rifuta and Teruhashi walked away from the closet.
            “Uh-oh. I guess this backfired a bit?” said (Y/N), wincing. “Sorry. It was my idea.”
            Saiki shook his head. “It’s fine. Rifuta just had a realization. It had to happen at some point.”
            “Who else would be someone’s gay awakening?” laughed (Y/N) slightly. They reached for the door handle. “At least we can leave now and one less person has a crush on you. And we didn’t get found in here. That would have been a scandal.”
            “Scandalous, huh?” Saiki smirked slightly.
            (Y/N) looked at his expression. “Uh, Kusuo? You alright?”
            Saiki leaned in and kissed them. (Y/N) was surprised but kissed back—they weren’t saying no to a kiss from Saiki. One of his hands supporting himself went to their waist and pulled them closer. (Y/N)’s felt the pressure and smiled into the kiss. Their hands rose and tangled into his hair as he kissed them.
            When the passionate kiss ended, Saiki leaned his forehead against theirs. “That is scandalous.”
            (Y/N) looked at him, breathless. “When did you become a flirt?”
            Saiki just smiled, leaned back in, and kissed them.
            “We—” kiss “—have—” kiss “—to—” kiss “—go—” kiss “—home—” (Y/N) spoke between kisses.
            Effortlessly, Saiki teleported them and their belongings back to his house, all the while continuing to kiss them. “There. Let me kiss you.”
            (Y/N) laughed, pulled him in, and kissed him.
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itstheval · 11 hours ago
Text
Memory of Visitation
A @livesworthlivingau Side Story
"Oh Stars, I remember this town! This place sucked!"
Siffrin said it with a laugh as they entered Wolworth, but everyone else simply glanced strangely at him. The realization hit them at the same time it did Mira, from the look on their faces. "Time travel s-" "NO SPOILERS!"
Mira half-pulled her rapier, but the look on her face was one of jest that kept a smile on Siffrin's face, even as they raised their hands up defensively. "Okay, okay! I just…There were a lot of memories wrapped up in this town. So, uh…" His eyes flickered around to the others, looking for help, and getting only amusement at his plight.
"Hmf. I believe, I will go take a walk. To explore. Bonnie, would you come with me? You have the shopping list." "Aw, Crab, I wanted to hear!" Mirabelle harumphed her way away, frills spinning as she twirled on a heel and walked into town, leaving Siffrin staring helplessly as Bonnie rushed to catch up with her, hat bouncing with every rushed step. Vale's laugh broke the tension, and Siffrin turned back to look at them. "Oh well DONE, Stardust! We can really see the skills it took you thirty years to hone!"
The flush darkening their cheeks was matched only by their urge to snap back, and they managed to find their voice. "Don't laugh too hard, Vale, not until you find out WHAT happened here. Besides, I might make sure it happens to you…"
"We got here…I want to say a few months, after the King? We'd met you, Nille, but there was a lot you didn't know. I hadn't even opened up to everyone yet…I'd say I'm sorry, but you know. Wrong people to apologize to. But you, Odile! You're always too clever, and you'd noticed, by now."
"I'll take that as a compliment." Odile managed, smiling wryly. She recognized an Old Man Ramble by now, but Siffrin's stories were always worth the listen.
"Noticed what, precisely?" Vale's question was colder, but from the look on their face, the queasiness in their expression, they already knew.
"Well…Back then. Before I knew any better. And I want to make it real clear, I know better now! But back then, I would…Punish myself. With my dagger. For things that…hadn't happened, to any of you? And I'd hide it with my Craft, which…I learned way more about the limits of Healing Craft than I should have."
Siffrin didn't bother looking at everyone's faces. He knew what they looked like. He'd seen them before, and they broke his heart the first time, when it was Odile revealing this. Even so much later, thinking about those expressions hurt.
What he wasn't expecting was the sudden enfolding of arms around him. Isabeau's warm body against his, enfolding him, and a moment later Odile's hand on his head, patting it gently. Even Nille joined in on the hug, and a glance up showed Vale nearby, looking in. This was…different? This was nice. Until, on some unspoken signal, everyone stepped away.
"I'm sorry Sif, just…the look on your face. I don't think anybody could see that and NOT want to give you a hug! We know it's alright, but the way you looked…"
"Like a crab just pinched your puppy." Nille confirmed.
"Yeah, or like…I dunno, like someone ate your favorite treat you were saving for later!"
In that moment, he was loved. In all moments, he was loved, but it was nice to see it so clearly, and the smile Siffrin let onto his face was genuine. "Thanks…I don't like thinking about this stuff. But, no bottling myself up, not to my family! That's what I promised."
"Promised who, precisely?" Odile's voice was wry, in the way that came when she was trying to not show affection.
"Well I was getting to that! Before everyone decided it was group hug time! Anyway! Odile noticed, and she…told everyone, when we were here. I'm not ashamed to say, I ran off. I was stupid…I thought none of you would care about me if you knew how much I hated myself."
"You're absolutely right, Stardust." Vale finally decided to add their two cents, and everyone's heads snapped towards them, making them glad that looks couldn't kill - they'd be dead four times over, at least! It was Odile who found her voice first.
"Explain?"
"He WAS stupid!"
Vale's laugh cut the tension that their statement made, and Siffrin was the first to join into it, before everyone else allowed themselves to be part of it.
"Right! Right, where was I…Running away. Right. Well, Odile was too smart again." A glance to her showed a smirk that showed she agreed. "I ran and hid in the House…and her letter had gotten there first. And when people showed up expecting me, and bringing me to an appointment? I wasn't going to tell them they had the wrong person. Whoever's appointment it was, I could hide there until you all forgot! And that's how I met my therapist."
The sharp bark of laughter from Odile showed just what she thought of that, but Isabeau was quick to follow, as Nille shook her head in exasperation. "That actually worked?" She said, around a smile, and Vale nodded with mock seriousness. "It would have worked on me. Smart."
Siffrin decided then to start walking and talking, as he explained the rest of it. "Doctor Jinn was…strange. Even for Vaugarde. It/its pronouns, with lightless hair with darkless spots in it, like the stars. I'd have almost thought it was from home, except that everyone I've seen from there had darkless hair…and Doctor Jinn was a housemaiden. Or…I mean, it was working in the house, and it wore a change symbol on a necklace? And one of them for a bonding earring? Anyway, it had its own office set up, and was ready for me and everything. It wasn't until it addressed me by my name that I realized what happened. But Odile, why did you tell it my name was 'Siffrin Nomiddlename Nolastname'?"
"I couldn't begin to imagine." Odile allowed, walking the crowded streets, Isabeau pushing ahead and the others walking in the wake of the broad man like wakesurfers…Siffrin briefly wondered where he'd heard that term, then remembered they were telling a story.
"Well, that's what it called me. Like that, like 'Nomiddlename' and 'Nolastname' were names themselves. It was a great listener, I'll tell you that…It seemed to accept the Wish Craft stuff pretty easily, and didn't blame me for…" a light cough. "Any of it." Siffrin glanced to the side, and when the others followed their glance, they saw Bonnie at a stall, haggling with a zit-faced teen about the price of tomatoes.
"The interesting thing was…Well, when we got there, we were sort of wandering wherever we felt like, just seeing the world? And it turned out that Jinn was traveling anyway, so we wound up joining it…or it joined us, but we just wound up going where it led. It was convenient, and it meant I couldn't get away from it, either. So…we wound up talking a lot. Almost the whole time we were in Wolworth, and even on the roads." Sif took a turn, but kept up his memories. "About the Loops, about what I could and couldn't remember, about…well, everything, really. How I felt about Isa, how I felt about touch, home, why the Universe granted wishes like it did - it really didn't have much to say there, but it was great to just get it out of my system."
Vale was starting to look uneasy as they walked along, and Siffrin knew it was now or never, time to strike and hope everyone else was on board. "It was so useful, in fact, that I felt like visiting again. I sent a letter ahead myself this time, since…well, you didn't have a reason to, Madame. And don't worry, Vale, I told them all about you!"
Siffrin's grin was shameless, and watching the look on Vale's face was worth the entire time, as they realized how close they were to the opened doors of the House. And how Isabeau was blocking them off to the side…Vale couldn't escape that way, maybe…no, Nille was over there. Maybe through the Madame? With that look on her face, no way. That was the Path of Pain.
Vale's shoulders slumped, as Siffrin stepped aside and gave a sweeping bow. "After you, my friend!" Vale muttered oaths under their breath as they marched to the doors, only to find a Housemaiden waiting for them.
"Siffrin and Vale Nomiddlename Nolastname? I'm Housemaiden David…I got your letter, but I'm afraid no one here's ever heard of a 'Doctor Jinn'. Would you like to come in anyway?"
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nadvs · 5 hours ago
Text
hard to ignore (two-shot) (part two)
pairing singledad! zach maclaren x nanny! female reader
summary when you’re offered a job as a nanny, you can tell right away that you’ll grow fond of the little girl you’re taking care of. things are easy to manage until you realize you’re falling for her dad.
content warning parental abandonment
» part one
» masterlist
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Zach gets you and his daughter box seats for his next home game.
It happens to be on your first day back at work after his family leaves and he jokes that sooner is better than later, not only because his team might get knocked out of the playoffs, but also because Ella could change her mind about wanting to come.
The private space overlooking the stadium is small, only a handful of other people there, as the late afternoon sun shines over the rich green field.
You learned that Zach is a major league soccer player minutes into meeting him. You knew he had an unusual life and a certain level of notoriety as a professional athlete. But seeing the crowds filling the seats below you makes it real to you.
The music and the announcer’s voice boom through the stadium, fireworks going off as players rush the field. All this craziness doesn’t match the man you know. Zach is kind and humble and beneath his silly sense of humor, he has a gentleness to him that you’d never expect from someone whose last name is sprawled over fans’ jerseys, who’s getting cheered for so loudly that it’s deafening.
Ella excitedly claps when her father appears on the stadium screen, his face hard as he jogs under the bright lights. You gaze ahead in awe, unable to believe that this is the world he lives in when he’s not at the house, running around with his daughter, thanking you for everything you do.
After the game ends in a draw, you take Ella home in time for dinner. As you drive, wipers cleaning away the drizzle that just started to fall, she excitedly rambles about the experience from the backseat. You smile to yourself, glad that she enjoyed herself and proud that you’re the reason she went.
As usual, Ella slips out of her chair with a mouthful of food when she hears the front door open halfway into dinner. You watch her dart out of the dining room, listening to the huff Zach lets out every time his daughter roughly launches herself into his arms.
“That was so cool!” you overhear.
“Really?” he says. “You didn’t get bored?”
“Um, it was kind of too long,” she says, “but I had pictures to color.”
“Appreciate your honesty,” Zach replies with a laugh.
They round the corner to enter the dining room and when Zach’s eyes land on you, your heart does a somersault.
“Hey,” he says to you, nervous.
“Hi,” you reply. “Thanks for the fancy seats.”
“They were alright?”
“Good enough for two princesses,” you tease.
“Princess ballerinas,” Ella corrects you as she sits down again.
“Right,” you say. “Sorry. I keep forgetting that we’re princess ballerinas now.”
Zach mirrors your smile, loving the feeling of sharing a moment like this with you. You stand to clean your plate and it reminds him of what his mother said a couple of nights ago. That you look at him the same way he looks at you.
He hopes that it’s true, because he can’t take his eyes off of you. He’s a little embarrassed that you saw him in a match. He’s always loved soccer, but he never liked how much attention is on him as a major league player.
“Maybe you should wait out the rain,” Zach says to you. “It started coming down hard on my drive home.”
“Good idea,” you say, happy to spend more time with him.
The rest of dinner consists of Ella happily chattering with you and Zach. As she clears her plate, Zach’s phone buzzes on the table top. His lips purse in worry at the notification, and then he shows you the severe thunderstorm warning message on his screen.
“That looks bad,” you say. “How long is it supposed to go on for?”
“It says into the early morning,” Zach answers. “Do you want to crash here?”
“I’m sure I could make it home,” you say. “I’ll just drive slowly.”
Zach’s lips part, and then he closes his mouth, simply nodding.
“What?” you chuckle. His eyes dart away.
“Just worried about you,” he admits. You huff an endeared laugh.
“Fine. I’ll sleep here,” you decide.
He sighs a breath of relief and says, “Thanks.”
Zach takes Ella to bed and you settle on the couch, glad you already have everything you’ll need in your overnight bag in the guest room. You eventually hear his footsteps coming down the stairs over the sounds of the television and the rain hammering down on the roof.
He sits on the other end of the couch next to you, so far that a person could easily sit between you. It’s typical Zach, never getting too close to you. The only time he’s ever touched you is when he shook your hand before your interview half a year ago.
“She fell asleep while I was explaining what offside means,” he says with an adorably puzzled expression. “Trying not to be offended.”
“I can’t believe she’s actually interested in soccer,” you say.
“Ouch.” Zach puts his hand over his heart. “Okay, I’m offended now.”
“I mean because you said she never cared before,” you laugh.
“I asked her so many times if she’d want to come to a game,” he huffs. “But you suggest it once and she’s immediately in. She always listens to you.”
“Not when I’m trying to convince her to leave the park,” you say. He chuckles. “Can you believe she’s starting kindergarten soon?”
Admittedly, Zach’s concerned about it. In less than a month, Ella will be going to school and he never was one to have much anxiety before he became a father, but all he does now is worry. He doesn’t want any teachers or kids to be harsh with his little girl. She’s already been through enough.
“She’ll be okay,” you say.
“What?”
“You have that worried look on your face,” you tell him. “She’ll love school. I’m sure of it.”
“You can read me pretty well,” he says, smiling. You shrug timidly, thinking back to how quickly he’d noticed something was bothering you on the night of Ella’s birthday.
“What?” he asks.
“It goes both ways,” you admit. “You saw right through me after the party.”
Zach’s jaw tightens, the playfulness between you replaced by a fragile air. He takes a breath before speaking. He knows he needs to have this conversation with you.
“Do you feel better about what she said?” he asks.
“Yeah,” you reply. Now that you’ve had some time to process, you’re okay. “How about you?”
“Well,” he begins, nerves tightening in his stomach, “it wasn’t easy to hear. Ella shouldn’t have to wish she had a different mom. Jade should be here for her.”
He’s never said her name. He’s never looked like this before, his eyes avoiding yours, hand trembling a bit as he scratches his jaw. You can tell this is hard for him to talk about. But he’s choosing to do it with you.
“You said ex-wife that night, but she was never my wife,” Zach admits.
“Oh. Sorry. I just assumed.”
“You don’t have to apologize. I know I haven’t told you much. When we talked that night, it reminded me of just how much you don’t know about it. I just… I hope you know that you’re… you’re so much more than Ella’s nanny. You’re our friend. And you’re obviously a mother figure to her. And it feels weird that you don’t know what happened.”
His words sink into you, every syllable having an effect on your heartbeat.
“What happened?”
“Ella was a surprise,” he tells you. “Jade and I were dating in our senior year of college when we found out she was pregnant. And then I got drafted into the league and we graduated and everything was happening so fast, but we were happy and… I stayed happy and she didn’t.”
You nibble on your bottom lip, looking at him as his eyes stay trained off of yours.
“We broke up a few months after Ella was born. But we were both sure we could handle co-parenting. She stayed at home while I worked. I could see she didn’t like it, though. She wasn’t a bad mother or anything. She just wasn’t very… affectionate with Ella.”
Your chest tightens. It’s painful to imagine Ella wanting love and not getting it.
“I don’t know. I thought she’d eventually feel how I feel about being a parent. I tried everything,” Zach says, remembering how he’d encouraged Jade to go to therapy or take time away or work while they hired help. It was like she was stuck in her unhappiness. “But then she left and… that was it.”
He finally looks at you and the tenderness in your eyes gives him a breath of fresh air. It’s what you do. Just by being you, you give him the push to stay hopeful that he and his daughter will be okay.
“We weren’t in a good place when you came. But you made things so much better,” he says. “You do an amazing job taking care of her. I really appreciate it.”
Your eyes light up, the smile on your face gentle.
“Thank you for saying that,” you say. “And thank you for telling me the full story. I’m so sorry that happened to you.”
Zach sighs now that the weight of reliving it is gone.
“I really do love her. I meant it when I said it.” At this point, you’re sure you love him, too, but you wouldn’t dare say it out loud. “And I feel lucky to get to watch her grow up. This doesn’t even feel like a job to me anymore.”
“So, what I’m hearing is, you don’t want the pay?” he says. You find relief in his joke, tossing your head back with a laugh. “Seriously, though, let me know if you need me to keep things the same while you’re part-time during the school year. I don’t mind.”
“Wait, are you offering to pay me for hours I’m not even working?” you chuckle. “Zach, no. I’m good. I have other things lined up. But thank you.”
“What? Everyone knows you should always accept free money.”
“I’ll keep that in mind,” you say. “How do you even have the energy to joke around right now? I just watched you run around for ninety minutes.”
Like always, Zach blushes when you bring up his job. He’s intense and focused on the pitch, but he’s different when he’s at ease at home.
“There’s a break in the middle,” he replies.
“I stand corrected,” you say. “So, how’d you get into soccer?”
Your conversation quickly and easily drifts into topics you hadn’t explored before, the storm raging outside as you learn more about him and he learns more about you. He’s still on the other end of the couch, but soon, his arm is resting against the back of it, his hand inches away from you as you sink into the soft cushions, beaming at each other as you talk.
You don’t want to stop, but eventually you can’t stifle your yawn, prompting Zach to check his watch.
“Jeez,” he says. “Ella went down three hours ago.”
“Are you serious?” You sit up. “That flew by.”
Zach knew that the more he learned about you, the more of a goner he’d be. It feels like he just went on the best date of his life and all he did was sit on his couch and talk.
There’s something between you and he hopes that it’s not just his infatuation misguiding him.
────୨ৎ────
You were right. He had nothing to worry about. Ella’s more than happy at school. It’s only a week into the year and she’s already naming all her new friends when Zach picks her up Friday afternoon.
Her first dance recital is tonight and he’s looking forward to seeing you and his family there. Ella had even mentioned that her other grandparents could come. They were elated to get the invitation.
And of course, when he arrives at the studio that evening, you’re already there, reliable and steady like you always are. You greet him and his family warmly and introduce yourself to Jade’s parents.
It feels wrong to hear you refer to yourself as Ella’s nanny. You’ve been in his life for eight months now and you’ve nestled your way into his soul so deeply that he knows you’ll stay with him forever.
He’s been grappling with this since he first realized he had feelings for you; this bothersome sense of wrong. He can’t pursue you. Technically, no matter how much it doesn’t feel like it, he is your boss. He pays you to take care of his child. If things went sideways, it could push you to leave.
Although he’s never felt this much love for a woman in his life, it’d be selfish. He can’t do it to Ella. He didn’t even want to date other women when Jade was still around simply because it could confuse his daughter.
But you’re different.
His thoughts are interrupted when you look at him, pulling him out of his haze.
“I saved us seats,” you tell him.
Zach’s sitting between you and his father when the recital starts. Eventually, Ella drifts across the middle of the floor between the other dancers.
“This is the part she’s nervous about,” you whisper to him, recalling how she’d told you that this part in the choreography makes her trip sometimes.
You watch her hop sideways, focused as the music grows faster. You’re so on edge that you don’t realize your hand slips into Zach’s, squeezing nervously. She lands her last skip and rejoins the group. You let out a sigh of relief. Then, you look down, seeing your fingers wrapped around Zach’s.
“Sorry,” you say, trying to laugh it off as you pull your hand back. “I think I’m taking a five-year-old’s dance recital a little too seriously.”
Zach can only offer a tight smile. His team’s inching closer to advancing to the championship semi-finals and the pressure has never been heavier, but even that hasn’t affected him like the tension he’s feeling right now. His whole body is on fire from your touch, and it won’t go away.
When the recital comes to an end, Zach leans closer to you to murmur over the applause surrounding you.
“You going out to dinner with us?” he asks.
“Do I have to?” you quip.
“What, you got a date or something?” He worries that the joke was too much. Too flirty.
But you laugh and say, “I haven’t had a date or something in forever. Yeah, I’ll come.” Although it’s hard to believe that a woman like you is single, he’s glad you are.
The eight of you sit in the busy restaurant, making conversation. As Zach expected, Ella insisted she sit next to you. You have endless patience for her, listening to her talk, answering her questions, letting her pick off your plate. He would move mountains for his child. He can tell you’d do the same.
Zach picks up the bill and you all say your goodbyes to Jade’s parents, who insisted they didn’t need to stay the night. Before you head out, you tell his family it was nice to see them again. He can tell you’re a little surprised when his mother pulls you in for a hug, but you kindly return it.
Connie obviously appreciates everything you’ve done for her son and granddaughter. Zach tries not to daydream too much, but he likes imagining being your boyfriend and telling you that his mom called that you’d become something one day.
When you say bye to Zach, your gazes meet like you’ve been waiting for a private moment for ages. Things changed on the night you stayed over. You went from friends to a gray area of something more, neither of you acting on it but knowing it’s there.
Only an hour after Ella falls asleep, Zach’s parents and sister turn in for the night, tired from their drive in. Zach is too wired, silently sitting in his living room, his tea not having its usual effect of soothing him.
He goes through his camera roll, wishing he could go for a drive to relax, but not wanting to leave his daughter in case she needs him. He stares at a photo his mother took of you and him and Ella earlier tonight after the recital, Ella’s hair frizzy from all the jumping around she did.
His smile is wide and so is yours and you look like more than just someone he hired to help take care of his daughter. You look like a family.
He opens your conversation and sends you the photo. It’s nearing 10 p.m. and he’s not sure if you’re already asleep, but you respond a minute later: Aw I love this. Thanks :) How’s your night going?
Zach responds: Good… but everyone’s asleep and I’m still wide awake. Yours?
You reply: Is your tea not working?
He smiles to himself and texts back: Not this time.
You text: I’m kind of wired, too.
How come?
Not sure.
He replies with a joke: Could be Ella’s fault. I saw her eat a lot of your dinner. It’s probably hunger keeping you awake.
Once again, his mind drifts to the way your palm felt against the back of his hand tonight. Then, he hears a door open upstairs. In case it’s Ella, he quietly rushes up the stairs to run into his mom, who’s leaving the bathroom.
“Sorry,” he whispers when he startles her. “I thought Ella woke up and I didn’t want her to think I was gone.”
“I’m sure she’ll be deep asleep until the morning,” Connie says. She notices he’s still in the clothes he wore to the recital. “Can’t sleep?”
“No,” he chuckles. “I’d go for a drive, but I–”
“If she wakes up, I’m here and if she needs you, I’ll call. Go. You need to take care of yourself, too.”
“I’m fine.”
“Go for a drive,” his mother insists. “She’s okay. I promise.”
Zach considers it. With work and Ella and you, his mind has been sort of chaotic. A drive, even a short one, will give him some relief.
“Thanks,” he finally says, giving his mom a grateful smile.
The streetlights plunge him in and out of darkness as he drives through town. When he got in the car, the impulse to go see you seemed ridiculous. With every minute that passes, it feels less and less silly.
Zach eventually pulls over and looks at his phone, staring at the text message he sent you ten minutes ago. How could he even ask to come over without coming on too strong or crossing a boundary?
He’s not sure if he believed in signs from the universe before, but when you text him right when he’s considering if he should text you, he takes it as his answer.
Nothing is ever her fault. But now I’m having a midnight snack lol. Are you still awake?
He replies: Yes. Just driving around. Do you want company?
He’s nervous as he waits. But then you send him your address.
Minutes later, you open your door to gentle knocks, heart skipping when you see him. At this point, being apart from Zach is starting to hurt. You lied when you texted him. You know exactly why you’re wired. It’s because he won’t leave your mind.
“Hi,” he says, a pink hue on his cheeks. “Kind of crazy that you’ve been to my house a million times, but I have no idea what your place looks like.”
“Is that why you’re here?” you ask. “You need to see it that bad?”
“I think it’s what’s keeping me awake.”
You laugh, stepping back, inviting him in. Zach’s eyes travel over your apartment, taking in every little piece that you’ve put into it. Being here is more intimate than he expected. And then you shut the door behind him, thickening the tension, both of you now sharing complete privacy in a way you never have before.
“Is that an Ella original?” he says, pointing to a drawing stuck on your fridge.
“Yup. That’s me and her and the castle we live in,” you tell him. You lead him into the kitchen as you gaze at the bright crayon marking the paper. “And that’s her horse. She was very adamant about it being her horse. But I can pet it if I ask nicely.”
He laughs and gazes at the drawing, touched that you’d keep something his daughter made up on display. Even when you’re not at the house, you want to be reminded of her.
“Where am I?” he asks in mock offense.
“I’m sure she meant to include you, but the horse took up too much space,” you explain, looking over your shoulder up at him. He’s inches away from you, towering above you. You’re so close to him that you can see the stubble growing over his jaw.
“The tutus are a nice touch,” he says, pointing to the pink skirts drawn on both of you. You laugh and turn to face him all the way. You clear your throat, smitten that he’s really here.
“She was great tonight, huh?” you ask.
“She was.” Zach’s smile is bright, the same way it always is whenever he talks about her. “And she wanted all the grandparents there.”
“I think that’s progress.”
“Me, too.” He exhales. “It was an almost perfect night.”
“Almost?”
“My hand still hurts,” he mumbles, face pinching as he looks down at his hand.
“Listen…” you say with a bashful smile. “I’m sorry, okay? I was stressed.” Zach laughs and it takes everything in him not to hug you. “Was it really that bad?”
“So bad,” he teases, flexing his hand. “You’re too reckless.”
“Reckless? Is that what you think of me?”
Zach cocks his head, staring down at you with a look that burns through you, and soberly says, “No. It’s not.”
His gaze drifts over your face, taking you in slowly. You think back to the first time you saw those eyes, sad and distant. Comparing the way he looked that morning to how he’s gazing at you right now is like comparing black and white.
The light atmosphere has quickly been replaced by a somberness hanging over both of you. Your heart is thumping against your chest. Hard.
“What, then?” you ask.
How can he even find the words to describe how you make him feel? You fit perfectly in every way. You settled into his life like there was always a place waiting just for you. Even tonight, when you grabbed his hand for only a moment, it felt like he was born to be touched by you.
You’ve brought light to his life. He always looked forward to coming home to his daughter, and now he looks forward to coming home to you, too. And having to continue to live like this, acting like his heart isn’t completely yours, is torture.
“I think you’re…” Zach’s tone is low, lids dropping as he looks at your lips before he speaks again. “Perfect.”
Your breath catches. You’ve been able to keep yourself away from him for what feels like ages. You’re not sure you’ll have the strength for much longer. This is the moment where everything can change. You know you both feel it.
“Should I not be here?” he says quietly.
It’s his way of making sure you’re okay. That you want him to be here as badly as he wants to be here. That even though maybe this shouldn’t be happening, you have faith that it will only bring you both joy, and you don’t need to consider the risks because you’ll never have to face them.
He looks so painfully unsure that you long to comfort him. Your hand finds his and he laces his warm fingers between yours the instant he feels you. He exhales slowly, never having felt so vulnerable before.
Too much is on the line. He’s only thinking of himself right now. He shouldn’t have come here, he shouldn’t have given in, he shouldn’t have–
“Stay,” you whisper. Your simple word untangles the knot in his chest. You step closer to seal the distance that remains between you. His eyes finally drift back up to find yours.
“I can’t help how I feel about you,” Zach murmurs. “I don’t want to mess up how good things are, but I just…”
He trails off into silence, sighing shakily.
“I know,” you say. “Me, too.”
“Tell me to leave,” he says with a note of pity. You breathe a sad chuckle.
“I can’t.”
“Why not?”
“Because I want you here.”
Zach’s grip on your hand tightens, his heart feeling like it’s just been put together after being fractured for years. His lips part and while he doesn’t know how to say how much your words mean to him, he knows how to show it.
He leans closer, cupping your face, capturing your lips with a soft and impatient kiss. You dissolve into bliss, eyelids fluttering closed as his hot mouth presses against yours, head swimming, body buzzing.
You wrap your arms around his shoulders, pulling him closer, eyelashes overlapping as you kiss deeply, hungrily tasting each other in adoration. His arms circle around you and surround you in warmth.
He lets out a short, almost silent moan against your lips, relieved and assured and grateful that you want him this badly, too. Everything about this feels right. He’s where he’s supposed to be, standing here, kissing you, baring his soul.
You’re breathless when you eventually pull away, eyes slowly opening as he tilts to plant a lazy kiss on your forehead, thumbs stroking your cheeks.
“I kept telling myself that I can’t like you,” he says against your skin. “Do you have any idea how impossible that is?”
You exhale a contented sigh, afraid that you did actually doze off and that this is all just a dream.
“I think I do,” you reply.
Zach’s laugh is breathy, leaning back just enough to look at you. He’s in awe, his lips tender from pressing against yours, his knees weak as he holds your face in his hands. Now that he doesn’t have to hide it or force himself not to stare, he lets himself drown in your eyes.
He brushes his lips against yours again and you smile under the kiss, placing your palm over his hand.
“Is this the hand I hurt?” you tease, gently squeezing.
“Ow,” he playfully winces, making you laugh. You nuzzle your cheek against his palm and smile up at him.
“You sure you like me?” you say. He’s sure he loves you, but it’s too much, too soon to say at this moment. “You know you can’t afford any injuries right now.”
“Worth it,” Zach plays along.
“I keep wanting to ask you about work,” you say. He hasn’t spoken much about playoffs, but you did a little research on his team’s standings. “How has it been? Are you stressed?”
“Pressure’s on, but I’m fine,” he says simply. Your words won’t find you at first. It’s sort of unbelievable how he doesn’t ever flaunt his success, not even a little bit.
“That’s it?” you laugh.
“What?”
“Your team could go to the finals and you’re just fine?” you say.
“How’d you know that?” he says, his heart warming.
“Had to look it up. Not like you’ll tell me,” you quip, pulling away, his hands falling off of you. Zach chuckles, following you into your living room.
“Are we fighting already?” he asks.
“We won’t be if you tell me why you get all cute and shy whenever you talk about your job,” you say, settling on the couch.
He sits to face you, his knee bumping yours. You love that he’s as close as you want him to be, instead of keeping a distance like before. He finds your hands, holding them in his.
“Just a second,” Zach mumbles. “I need to process that you called me cute.”
You giggle, leaning forward to nuzzle against his chest.
“I’m serious,” you say, your voice muffled by his shirt. “We talk about my job all the time.”
“Oh, come on. Because we have to. That’s the whole deal.”
“Is it?”
Zach sighs, kissing the top of your head, loving the way your body slightly shakes with your laughter. You sit up again, looking down as you interlace your fingers with his, playing with his hands as you wait for him to speak.
“I love soccer,” he says, “but I never expected I’d be good enough to go pro. And somehow, I did and all the attention that comes with it is just… it’s not me. I’ve never been the loudest guy in the room. Never wanted to be.”
You nod. You could tell soon after meeting him that while he’s confident and loves to joke around, he’s not one to demand the spotlight.
“And now the more attention I get,” he continues, “the more people might want to know about me and I’d rather keep Ella safe and give her a normal life.”
He scratches his cheek, uncertainty flashing on his face.
“And… I’m not exactly proud that I’m not working a normal job. I’m always thinking that maybe it’d be better for Ella if I had a nine to five, but the pay is great and I can’t play forever, so I just want to save up as much as I can for her. Then I’ll find something more steady.”
You're sure you’ve never met a person this humble. It’s nice to know what goes on in his head after having wondered for so long.
“Will you still even need a nanny then?” you ask lightheartedly. Zach purses his lips as he nods.
“I will if she’s you.” You smile as he pulls you in, holding you as your cheek rests against his shoulder.
“I don’t think there’s anything that you shouldn’t be proud of,” you tell him. “You’re an amazing father.”
“You don’t know how nice it is to hear you say that,” he admits. The worries that he’s being selfish have been gnawing at him for a long time. He’s always concerned he’s making the wrong choices for his daughter.
“I think it every time I see you with her. I know you said she was a surprise, but you treat her like being her dad is all you’ve ever wanted.”
Zach leans to kiss your forehead over and over again, palm gently pressed on your cheek, like he’s making up for all the times he wanted to kiss you but couldn’t. You start to giggle under all the kisses, hugging him tighter.
“Speaking of,” you say, “I’m sure you’re thinking it, too, but we should keep acting like we’re just friends when we’re around our boss.”
He breathes a chuckle, nodding as he looks down at you lovingly.
“Yeah,” he murmurs. “We’ll take it slow. She’ll be so happy when we tell her.”
“You think so?” you say, your heart blooming from the certainty in his words, from the way he unabashedly intends on being with you and telling his daughter.
“She’s always asking me if I like you.” Truthfully, Ella asks if he loves you, but again, he doesn’t want to use that word until he’s sure you’re comfortable with it.
“Really?”
“Oh, yeah,” he says. “She actually asks if I like you yet. It’s like she knows it’s inevitable.”
You realize that the way you’re wrapped up in each other does feel like it was always inevitable. You know that your heart would never have been able to resist him. You’re glad he feels the same way about you.
────୨ৎ────
A week after the night in your apartment is the semi-final. You’re sitting in the living room playing with Ella with the game on in the background. She’s partly interested, whereas you can’t ignore the ball of nerves sitting deep in your stomach.
Zach’s been opening up more about his job when you get time alone, admitting that the pressure can give him tunnel-vision sometimes. You’ve taken on the workload as much as you can so that he’s not too stressed.
You’ve kept things the same when you’re around Ella and you’ve already determined that if she asks why you’re so invested in what’s on tv, you’ll simply say you grew an interest in soccer after the home game you both attended. But she’s too busy playing with clay to care.
The first half ends with no goals scored. You set up an afternoon snack for Ella, letting her help, your mind elsewhere as you imagine Zach in the locker room, wondering what his coach is telling him and what he’s thinking about at this moment.
Five minutes after half-time, the opponents score. Your heart sinks. Twenty minutes later, Zach scores. You have to stifle how loudly you want to cheer.
Then, the game goes to penalty shoot-outs. Zach had told you how much he hates when a game comes down to that. It’s a nail-biting few minutes, but Zach’s team wins, securing their spot in the finals. In his next game, his team could take the cup.
Right before dinner, you and Ella change into the jerseys you’d secretly bought a few days ago. Zach already told you that even if his team wants to celebrate a win together, he’d prefer to see you two, so you know he’s coming straight home.
He steps through the front door to see you in his team’s jerseys, rushing to give him a hug. Your arms are around his shoulders while Ella’s are around his hips, both of you excitedly cheering. Zach’s heart has never felt so full.
“So, I take it you watched it?” he mumbles into your hair, reveling in the familiar aroma of your shampoo. It takes everything in you not to kiss him when you pull back.
“You did amazing,” you tell him.
“Daddy, do cats ever come to your games?” Ella asks.
Zach looks at you, puzzled.
“There was a commercial with clips of animals crashing soccer games,” you explain, laughing. “It’s a valid question.”
“I haven’t seen any,” he tells her, kneeling to meet her eyeline. “But I hope we get one so I can tell you all about it.”
“Could we keep it?” she asks.
“If a cat comes onto our field and it doesn’t have an owner, sure, we can keep it,” he says. She jumps excitedly, then runs off to play. Zach stands up again, grinning at you.
“Don’t let her watch any more matches,” he says. “If a cat shows up, I’m done for.” You laugh, crossing your arms simply to keep yourself from touching him.
“Congratulations,” you say. “I know you don’t like the attention, but you deserve it.”
“Thanks.” He looks down at your jersey. “It looks great on you.”
“Yeah?” you ask, turning to show him the back. It’s his last name and number. He almost can’t believe this is really happening, that he met someone like you who cares about him this much.
“Better on you, I think,” you say.
“Impossible.”
You face him and he gazes at your lips in the way you know means he wants to kiss you. In the few private moments you’ve had since you confessed your feelings for each other, you’ve shared warm hugs and sweet kisses. You can’t wait until you don’t have to hide your love for him anymore.
“Dinner in twenty,” you tell him. “I bet you worked up an appetite.”
Zach’s legs are heavy as he trudges up the stairs, partly from fatigue, but mostly because the last thing his body wants to do is be away from you.
────୨ৎ────
Zach’s family drives in to watch the championship game at the house. You weren’t all that nervous around them before, but now that you and Zach are privately dating, you’re eager to impress them.
He had mentioned to you that he hadn’t told them about you yet, but he’s hoping to the next time he sees them. He also told you how his mom had a suspicion about you two, which makes you hope you’re not too obvious.
It’s only been a couple of weeks since you decided to date, but every moment you get alone with Zach isn’t long enough. You knew he was kind-hearted, but now that he’s not holding back, he showers you with affection and compliments, reminding you of how much he appreciates you every day.
Just like it is with Zach, it’s easy with his family. You talk and snack and take turns playing with Ella while you watch the game. The game starts off as promising, but unfortunately, the final ends with a loss for his team.
“He did tell me they were kind of the underdogs,” you say to his family sadly, watching the screen. “I still think it’s great that he got this far.”
The stadium he’s playing in is hours away and he won’t be getting home until after midnight. You spend the rest of the evening with Zach’s family, wishing you could see him and give him a comforting hug.
When Zach gets to the locker room, dejected and disappointed, he checks his phone to see a text from you. I know it’s not how you wanted the season to end, but you played an amazing game. We’re all so proud of you, no matter what.
It’s ten minutes past midnight when you hear the front door open. You’ve been sitting in the kitchen, staying awake on your phone after everyone turned in for the night. You turn on the kettle you already filled with water and find Zach in the dim hallway, meeting his eyes with sympathy.
“You’re here,” he mumbles in surprise. You only close the distance, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and squeezing him tightly.
“Wanted to see you,” you whisper. “Are you okay?”
“I’ve had better days,” he admits, kissing your neck. “This feels good, though.”
“I’m making you some tea if you want it,” you tell him, “but if you’d rather go to bed, I get it.”
“Tea sounds good.” He pulls back, stroking your cheek. “You’re really proud of me? Even though I’m a total loser?”
You half-chuckle, nudging him.
“Never call yourself that again,” you say.
“Or what?”
“Or I’ll stop ‘accidentally’ making too much food,” you joke, earning a chuckle from him.
You settle in the kitchen, reminded of the first time you sat together like this all those months ago to plan Ella’s birthday party. Now she’s halfway to six years old, growing faster than you could have ever anticipated.
After you put the steaming mug of tea in front of him, Zach puts his hand over yours, squeezing.
“I tried to be positive but I saw it coming,” he admits to you. “They were the stronger team. We’ll just train harder and hopefully get them next year.”
“And I’ll be with you every step of the way,” you say. “Just don’t beat yourself up over this, okay? You’re not a loser.”
“Baby…” Zach breathes a chuckle. “Being with you makes me feel like I’m always winning. It sucks to get this far and to put so much work in just to lose, but knowing you and Ella are waiting for me at home… That's what my life is really about.”
You stare at him, awestruck, heart beating so hard that you can hear it in your ears.
“I love you,” he says. “I’m sorry if it’s too soon to say, but I’ve loved you for a long time.”
You bite your lip, giving into the urge to lean closer and kiss him. When you pull back, palm resting on his cheek, you smile.
“I love you, too,” you say. “It’s not too soon.”
“Phew. I was more nervous about telling you than I was about the game,” he says. You laugh, pinching his cheek.
“Stop being so cute,” you whisper.
“I can’t help it,” he quips. “I didn’t forget how you said you haven’t been on a date in forever. What do you think about tomorrow night? Ella will stay with my family and you and I can go out for dinner.”
“That sounds perfect,” you tell him. You chat a little longer before you head home.
When Zach tells his mother he’s taking you out for dinner the next morning, she’s overjoyed to hear that you’re an item now and throws in a few ‘I told you so’s. When the evening rolls around, he tells Ella he’s running some errands and instead drives to pick you up from your place.
Sitting across from you at a restaurant on a real date feels like a dream. He holds your hand on the table and nudges your knee with his every so often, unable to keep his hands off of you like usual. It’s like talking with a best friend, the conversation flowing so naturally that he refuses to believe he’s only known you for just shy of a year.
When he drives you home after dinner, you lose track of time kissing him goodnight.
────୨ৎ────
You and Zach had discussed that today would be the day. Now that you’ve been together for over eight months, he’s ready to tell Ella.
It’s a Saturday and Zach’s making lunch while you and Ella set the table. Long gone are the days of spending just a few minutes together, one of you arriving at the house while the other one gets ready to leave. The three of you are almost always a unit now, settled into a routine.
After lunch, you leave as planned so he can talk to her one-on-one. Zach finds Ella drawing on her bedroom floor after he says his goodbyes to you and knocks on her door.
“What are you drawing?” he asks.
She holds up the paper, three figures under the shining sun. When he asks if that’s you, him, and her, she happily nods.
Zach settles on the floor, watching the way she colors in the yellow sun, her legs kicking in the air. He’s seen a change in his child. There’s no doubt about it.
While she was always a happy kid, she’s grown to be much more expressive and affectionate since you stepped into their lives. You bring out the best in her. The best in him, too.
He tries to force down the tears that come up every time he looks at his daughter and thinks about what happened a year ago. She’s too small to have to know the pain of abandonment and betrayal. He pushes away the thought.
“I wanted to ask you something,” Zach says, clearing his throat.
“Do you want another bracelet?” she says.
Zach smirks, looking down at the beaded bracelet on his wrist that she made for him a few days ago. She made you a matching one that you always wear, too.
“Yeah, if you’re not too busy,” he says. “But that’s not it.”
He says it exactly as he rehearsed, telling her how happy you make him and asking if she’s okay with you being his girlfriend. When she grins up at him and asks if that means that you can move in with them, he chuckles, tears pricking his eyes.
Zach always felt like he needed to make up for the love Ella’s mother wasn’t giving her. Now, there’s nothing to make up for, nothing missing. He wishes the circumstances had been different, but he knows he’s lucky that he met you.
He was sure soon after he got to know you that his daughter would grow to love you. Deep down, he was sure that he would grow to love you, too.
────୨ৎ────
It’s past nine p.m. when Zach gets home from training. Now that he’s in the midst of playoffs again, he doesn’t get as much time at home anymore, but he takes it in stride.
When he can’t find you on the main floor, he tiptoes upstairs in case you’ve fallen asleep putting Ella to bed. Sure enough, she’s snuggled up next to you, both of you snoozing.
It’s been a month since he told her about your relationship and somehow, she’s grown to love you even more now that she knows you love her dad. Zach wonders if Ella can see how much happier he is these days. He tried to hide how empty he felt before, but maybe she caught on.
He’d rather not know. He’s rather not think about the past at all, really. Because right now, as he gazes into his daughter’s bedroom to see you hugging each other in your sleep, he knows he’s looking at his future.
(the end)
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childrenofcain-if · 13 hours ago
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Yeah okay i see all the D love and it's not like I'm not out here simping for C or......W... seriously i fucking am so obsessed with W it's insane. I love their history with MC and i just want my MC to love them so hard. But i digress I'm not here for that Axel!!!
Where is the V love people!! I want to bake a cake and then go surprise! It's for you! I just loved cooking with them because they just made some rubbish, but it was so cute!! 😭😭😭
One thing I'm maybe confused about V is. So they obviously had some gay panic, and as glorious as it was, it stems from their religious background, right?
(I can fucking relate to that shit so much)
but they also have 2 mom's... so is that a bio mom, or are they adopted?
Was the religious stuff pushed on them while in an orphanage? Because fucking hell.
Here, some families, especially very traditional ones add in christianity for a full blown hateful mix, still don't even acknowledge your gayness. it just isn't spoken about while others are straight up (lol straight up.. sorry) just kicking their kids out because being gay is not an "african" thing. Oooh, or it's from the devil, so is mental illness, but that's a whole different ballgame of nonsensicalness 😒
Sorry i asked so much shit and rambled on. Ignore me if it's too spoilery.
i’ll have some birthday specials for all ROs up as soon as i get my shit together, MC can indulge in a disastrous baking session tho if y’all would like that 🤭
and about V, the orphanage they grew up in was not very love-thy-neighbour type, ironic cause they were all literally catholic but i digress. as a result of that, up until they were adopted, V was exposed to a lot of homophobic and transphobic rhetoric. while they themself never ever held any hatred or prejudice in their heart for those people, the fear-mongering made them scared enough to never show any romantic feeling that weren’t heteronormative.
their moms had to go through a lot of hurdles to even adopt them and the road was not easy. it took them around 3-4 years to get everything approved so they could bring V to america.
while watching their moms and having some sort of progressivity around them has made it much easier for them to not feel like a complete, the religious trauma and guilt is deep and homeboy/homegirl is in denial about their sexuality 😔
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cityoftheangelllls · 2 years ago
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So I caught a nasty bug this weekend (probably from student teaching, cuz yk how little kids can be with germs and forgetting to wash their hands, etc.) so lately I've been feeling pretty drab, combined with it being the last semester of college and a lot of work having to be done over the next week or two. But I know I'll be okay. Student teaching has been hectic and I have a lot of responsibilities, but the students are awesome and really like me, and I want the best for them.
Another good thing that came out of this weekend happened yesterday when I came home from running errands with my dad (I felt well enough to go out with him and I had to get used to the new car I got a few days prior). When I walked in the house I saw that my mom was sitting in the family room watching the Rankin/Bass Hobbit (which, as some of you may know, is a favorite of mine). My mood was instantly boosted and I got so hyped! My mom said that she just happened to find it on HBO Max and she instantly thought of me, and she turned it on just because. I ended up joining her and watched the rest with her, and she kept commenting on how much she loved the artwork and music. The only part she couldn't sit through was, naturally, the giant spiders in Mirkwood. Annnnd of course she wanted to know more about Middle-Earth lore and the One Ring, so we ended up starting the extended edition of FOTR last night as a family (me, my parents, and my younger sister).
It used to be that I was really the only Tolkien nerd in my house. My dad had only seen the movies, but I did eventually get him to read the books, and my mom and sister wouldn't be caught dead watching anything high fantasy or sci-fi. So, through a series of fortunate events, I succeeded in moving my family nearer to the same level of nerdiness I am at!
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every time I hear someone say "oh you have to listen to Dear Evan Hansen it has such good mental health representation" I cry in Next to Normal
#next to normal#and yes this is based on a true story#generally I dont try to juck anyones jum so I of course didn't tell that person what I was thinking at that moment#and if someone found Dear Evan Hansen a useful text in terms of their own mental health journey who am I to discredit that#but this is the internet and I am back on the ntn train#in a way it is my saf autumn musical#and yes I am a survior of the 2017 Tony Awards why were you asking?#no but seriously#it is so interesting how many narrative devices Dear Evan Hansen took from Next to Normal#but turned them into a less complete piece#like Gabe in ntn is a representation of unadressed grief and trauma and the family has to accept that he will never be really gone#and connor is just...idk not fully thought out?#idk I'm rambling#but also#how the love story between Henry and Natalie means something#Natalie sees her parent's relationship and desperately doesn't want that for herself and Henry at the same time also stand for#a piece of normalcy that seems attainable#you don't sit there and think hu why is there this completely separate love story thrown in there?#it mirrors the problems#and dear evan hansen#do I even have to say it#I thnk the thing I resent it most for is that it has a love story#naja#I'm of listening to net to normal some more#sorry I someone who really likes deh stumbles accross this#I feel like espechially musicals can be something that can be so personal#and I don't actually want to contribute to more stuff like#ew why do you like this when theres xyz that is so much better or morally purer or whatever#I guess what I do want to say is: if I had a nickle for everytime they made a musical about mental health where theres a ghost on stage and#the sister of the dead kid falls in love with a funny guy while her family is falling apart
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milolunde · 1 month ago
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We all know Timmy is Wanda’s mama’s boy but we need to keep in mind he’s still Cosmo’s kid too and that Cosmo would love him just as vehemently as Wanda
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#fairly oddparents#not that anyone has portrayed him different#certainly not distance he loves Timmy he probably says it the most in the show and in fanon#but still- watching New Wish there felt like there was a disconnect with Cosmos character-like he wasn’t as well defined as he was in OG#that’s in part due to them toning him down from being an idiot plain and simple but I feel like it wasn’t fitted with something else it was#simply taken away#just to say he didn’t have as much of a presence to me in New Wish as Wanda did and I crave spinning Cosmo around in my brain#I want to see Poof being his Dad’s Boy yknow and I want to see cosmo doting and I want to see when he gets like. parental rage for the sake#of his kids#yknow? Yknow? part of him feeling detached in a new wish has translated into him not wanting to get as close to Hazel as he did Timmy-#to try and play it more like godparents are supposed to- just a presence for a couple months#but also because like. he got SO attached to Timmy and he’ll never regret it and he’d never do anything different#but idk. if it were me I wouldn’t have the capacity to go through losing my godkid again after becoming that attached#that’s not even mentioning that they don’t HAVE to be in hazel’s life the same way they were in Timmy’s because Timmy was going through#neglect and Hazel has loving family and friends all around her at all times- her blocks are mental#in that way cosmo and Wanda just have to do the Typical Godparent Job of aiding her- not becoming people she desperately needs in life#which also bleeds into why I think Peri was having such a. difficult time#godparents aren’t supposed to be attached the way his family was to Timmy and that how he learned it#but his first godkid is Not Easy and lends immediately to the issues Timmy was having where he HAS parents he HAS things (though . Timmy#was not rich and would sometimes not be fed… dev’s dad also forgets to feed him but dev is still able to eat you know)#and how he grew up with his parents as godparents and how he’s been taught are conflicting and it’s nature vs doing a good job quoteunquote#I didn’t mean to ramble so damn much in the tags I’m really sorry#told myself if I had more to say I’d write it down and post it later but I must be heard.
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citricacidprince · 1 year ago
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Thinking about Psychonauts and how much I love the Aquato family once again
They mean the world to me your honor
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#They are a strange little family with so many issues and generational trauma and YET they still LOVE EACHOTHER#DO YOU KNOW HOW IMPORTANT THAT IS TO ME???#Nona; Augustus; Donatella; Dion; Frazie; Rasputin; Mirtala; Queepie-#I love you all and I owe you my life#DION AND DONATELLA ESPECIALLY; Y’ALL GET SO MUCH HATE FOR HAVING UNDERSTANDABLE NEGATIVE EMOTIONS AND IT DRIVES ME UP THE WALL :(#Aquatos get behind me; I’ll protect you from the people who think you abuse Raz and should just get adopted by Sasha and Milla#that’s a bad take and they should feel bad. like; he can still see Sasha and Milla and alternate parental figures; that’s fine-#But Raz; CANONICALLY; would NEVER give up his family; EVER#That boy would force everyone to have a heart on heart with him until everything is better because he DOES that in the GAME#When you talk to you family in Psychonauts 2 you can tell how much he loves them and how much they love him; even if it’s strained at the-#moment from how stressful the past THREE DAYS have been#YES EVEN DION AND DONATELLA#They love Raz so much!!! They’re both just going through it™️ atm and need time to clear their head: remember; everything that has happened-#has been in the span of 3 DAYS and their whole lives have been completely flipped upside down#I think they’re allowed to be upset; in fact; it would be weird if they weren’t#sorry this is word garbage I just love that family so much it makes me wanna drink paint#prince rambles in this chilies tonight#aquato family#psychonauts aquatos#psychonauts 2#psychonauts
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dootznbootz · 5 months ago
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What’s your opinion on the whole ‘Odysseus is ACTUALLY the son of Sisyphus’ like where does that myth come from? I don’t think it’s that well known and I don’t think many people ascribe Odysseus with Sisyphus but it does make me wonder how such statement came to be
Sorry this took so long😭I really loved this ask and wanted to really have the time and energy to answer it!
So for the sources for it, nysus-temple has a great post on it. (another for good measure) I recommend asking them too!
From what I know for the myth, Autolycus has beef with so many people because he was a lil shit. Sisyphus decides to either seduce or rape Anticlea as revenge. Laertes marries her. (Laertes was an Argonaut, so I'd like to think that Jason being his friend AND Anticlea's half-sibling played a bit of a part)
I also think that it was possibly slander against Odysseus with how he's "a man of many turns". Sisyphus didn't honor xenia and was just an overall ass to many people but he was smart. A lot of people don't see him as a good man. Odysseus is very similar in many ways so I believe that this was meant to insult Odysseus as many people did not like him.
My Opinions PERSONALLY will be down below. (aka DO NOT take anything I say down below as fact. I'm just silly :P )
I plan to write it to be unknown.
For what I'm planning for Laertes and Anticlea's love story, has a lot to do with the whole "argonaut and friend of Jason". After what happened to Anticlea, Autolycus wasn't sure what to do and Laertes wanted to marry her. (I'm weird and think the idea of Odysseus and his mother going through the same thing would be interesting to pick apart :') ) Laertes secretly always admired her. Autolycus heard of this quiet country bumpkin and was like "Yeah. You seem good." Odysseus is born 9 months later. And it's unknown who's the father but it doesn't matter to Laertes.
Odysseus in mine takes after Anticlea physically in practically every way. (My post on his appearance in my fics) Ctimene also takes after Anticlea quite a bit but she has Laertes' eye color and her being more "stout" like he is.
Odysseus is around 13 when he first hears rumors about Laertes not being his dad and that Sisyphus is. That's a lot on him. It really bothers him when people try to say that he's actually Sisyphus' son. Just because he's smart and a lil shit doesn't mean that he's his son. He just takes after his mom's side of the family. And it means so so much to Odysseus that his dad loves him regardless.
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viatrix-glow · 2 months ago
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(blood warning) guys i got a tattoo for switch :3 from harajukutattoo 💜💜💜
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this was the original idea i had but the artist worked with me to help make it more simple and cutesy for a tattoo design cause i designed it from just an artist’s perspective
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shes so cute and i’m obsessed with her it was worth the pain and the migraine i got from no caffeine
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xxplastic-cubexx · 6 days ago
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sorry if you've already mentioned but what (re?)ignited your love of comics/x-men/cherik? curious because there are so many different adaptations of them
i think im gonna speak for a few (or a lot of) people when i say that TL;DR the wolverine x deadpool movie that came out this summer is what pulled me back into comics and i COULD leave it there but i will go into excruciating and unnecessary detail instead because i love an origin story and i love oversharing.
under the cut tho because im nice sometimes (there's also wxdp doodles in here. if you want to see that)
ironically (and probably commonly), growing up i was more of an avengers kid. Kinda. Loosely <- binge watched the cartoons and movies and read copious amounts of comics and fics and i am hoarding fanart in my old dresser as we speak ok 'loosely' is a modest lie.
embarrassingly i remember getting into discus cause of captain america LMAO so yeah needless to say i was a Humble Fan- me joining my school's comic class/club didnt help either (shoutout to my teach from that she was the realest one out there for. A Multitude of reasons). she definitely is was inspires me to even draw still and make comics and i often think bout the tips i learned from her class tbh she was great
back to the movies t and comics tho, i got into em because my brother would offer to take me and that's how we'd hang out (i rarely saw movies in theaters and i even more rarely went anywhere as a teenager. still kinda like that today tbh ooops) and yk. it just snowballed after that.
my brother and i have always liked comics- he just more than me for a while (though he still very much loves comics and As We Know From My Posts we still talk about them whenever i see him To An Exhausting Degree)
durin then i was really into stony and i have a few surviving doodles i made but those are between me and god. and anyone who asks tbh LOL
'snap can you make this related to x-men again this is long' ok so fast forward to This Summer again I Still Don't Really See Movies but my brother offered to take me and this was the first time i'd actually seen an x-men movie in full
as a kid i only remember seeing the 'perfection' scene between erik and raven in first class while i was channel surfing. pretty sure i changed the channel after seeing mystique naked cause i was scared my parents would get mad at me if they caught me watching it LOL
BUT MOVING ON As A Kid i think it's also natural you'll sometimes watch 92 if it's on And I Did though evidently it didn't stick too hard (i do remember really liking beast and gambit though.... still do really): my knowledge of x-men was. INCREDIBLY sparse. like diabolically so so i didnt have too much expectations (aside from the fact i vaguely liked deadpool beforehand).
tbh i dont know why my bro never took me to see any of the x-men movies. it's not like he doesn't Also like x-men (90% sure nightcrawler's his favorite but my brother will be caught dead saying he has absolute favorites like that)- he owns a bitch load of deadpool comics/omnibus sets too (of which ive read over the years and reread this year) but Shrug moving on
Much Like Most Of The Internet i fell down the rabbit hole that way. i have some doodles i made a couple days after seeing WxDP that i now have an excuse to throw at all of you Look And Perceive
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and so. As I Do. i got curious and told myself i'd binge watch all the x-men movies the week before i went back to school And Then I Did ft. My Brother Sometimes and then i said i'd binge watch all of '92 and And I Did That ft. My Brother Sometimes But Less So and now we're here. currently watching Evolution...
once i got to school i realized i lived near a comic shop and started getting into the comics that way (the first ones i got since going down this rabbit hole was Magneto Was Right!, The Resurrection of Magneto, and The Trial of Magneto. if you were curious !!!!! clearly i didnt care too much about context i just needed to see My Guy jelvejlkvj i have no regrets and Evidently ive read more since)
i'm pretty sure what dragged me into cherik specifically was the fact i saw a clip of The Famous ending to 92 where erik's aghast at the notion jean even has to question his love for charles. i think that was what officially had me refocus my lens on them: not a single poolverine thought after that LOL (all the cherik posting i saw on twitter definitely helped too but that was the nail in the coffin for any other interests i had: i was locked into cherik and x-men in general now)
that clip specifically, i was surprised at the fact they- frequently even- have the x-men franchise say erik loves charles and vice versa so bluntly. even if it's not meant to be romantic, i fear im just a fan of how casually the word's thrown around with them two and i got tender bout it all. Then Yk. i just live for the drama. the hilarity even. the sincerity .... they make me sick if i think of them too long so im gonna end it here
before i go tho ironically enough, the first x-men issue i owned was This one (story a this is that while stuck in some wacko dimension charles accidentally gets himself trapped in logan's mind while utilizing his astral projection. if you were curious). pretty sure i got it for free with another comic set i got years ago since our old comic shop loved to do that, but it's poetic aint it. maybe ill doodle something referencing it..
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i should probably look into finishing this arc someday im Dummy curious to even know how it started and how it ends.....
#snap chats#usually this onea them posts i ramble bout in the tags but i have photos and this is Long long so .. i use the main body for once ...#sorry i gave a biography but i never talk to people and i also love typing. im one of those party can-of-worms i fear#i feel like i could talk about this forever because x-men itself has never been super prominent in my childhood#it was just kinda there in the background BUT comics themselves have always been with me. theyre a keystone to me i think#but yeah. x-men definitely sticks a lot harder than avengers does now OOPS this is not me taking shots i am just SAYING#i have a lot of old marvel doodles tbh .. i found an old deadpool one i remember drawing with my bro during a car ride#kinda funny how much my bro and i bond i dont think of it much but I Guess thats another reason why comics are special to me#we dont bond much- i dont bond with my fam in general tbh we're kinda. Isolated in a way LOL so its cool we're tight at least#if you wanna go deeper bout Comics And My Family my dad really liked comics growing up- more dc tho maybe#apparently he used to draw hulk a lot but if he did those drawings are loooong gone.. at least i know who to blame for me drawing#he loves superman tho. i remember id get embarrassed watching superhero cartoons and superman was on screen when he was around#for some reason i thought id get in trouble if he caught me watching superman but when he did once he was real happy so. tf wrong with me#he loves to say hes superman a lot and id be like Dad... Stop... LMAO but in the cheesiest way possible he do be my hero so. accurate ig#but yeah thats my origin story for why i like comics again thank you for reading if you actually read all that#and sorry it got all sappy Unfortunately i be like that sometimes. i am very emotionally constipated and i over explain a lot#ok i fr gonna end it here im gonna keep going by accident if i thinka any longer and i have stuff i still have to do
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avirael · 1 month ago
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This Home of Mine
How had it come to this?, Aviloh asked himself as the argument around him began to get louder. Somehow he had known it would all end horribly one day. He just had hoped it would take a little longer. He only had himself to blame for this, he thought as his eyes fearfully scanned the crowd that was slowly gathering around them.
There at the sidelines stood U‘khaya with a gleeful expression on her face. She knew this would happen, he realised. But A’viloh wasn’t the kind of person to blame her for what happened…
U‘khuba���s twin sister had always been following the boys around even when they all had still been kids. She had been a brave and stubborn little girl, maybe a little mean sometimes but not more so than her brother. A‘viloh had always thought she was following them because of Khuba - twins being inseparable or something. Never had he imagined the reason would be Laqa instead.
Of course he could have guessed it. Everyone loved Laqa! Apparently Khaya wasn’t an exception in this matter.
That evening - before the argument - A‘viloh had waited for quite some while by the pond. They had always used to hide there when they still had been kids, every time the other boys had stirred trouble or teased the girls.
By now it was one of the spots Laqa and him sometimes used as meeting points when they sneaked out of the settlement together. But today the other Miqo’te had arrived so late, A‘viloh had already started to wonder if something had happened.
“There you are!”, Aviloh said relieved as Laqa finally appeared just when he was about to go searching for him. “I was already worried. Did something happen?”
The blonde Miqo’te made an annoyed face. “Just Khaya happened…”
A’viloh didn’t understand. “Khaya? What’s wrong with her?”
“Everything apparently!”, Laqa exclaimed disgruntled, which made A‘viloh even more confused.
Laqa sighed.
“She waylaid me on my way outside.”, he explained but couldn’t help to look a little angry still. “Started talking some nonsense about how impressed she was about the quarry from our last hunt and how it is a shame that it isn’t me leading the tribe instead of father.”
A’viloh furrowed his brows, still not quite connecting the dots. Laqa grimaced. “Then she threw herself at me and tried to kiss me.”
“She what?”, A‘viloh exclaimed a little louder than intended, with a mix of shock and disbelief on his face.
Laqa raised his hands in a calming manner. “Don’t worry! I of course told her that I am not interested. Like I ever would be anyway! We may be almost the same age but she is still my mother’s sister. What was she even thinking, Vi?”
A‘vi shrugged but couldn’t help to remember something one of Laqa’s sisters had once told him. “Lamana mentioned that Khaya didn’t agree with some of U‘odh‘s opinions. She thought her and Khuba were still mad with him because of their father…”
“That makes no sense! They have no reason for that! It’s not like father threw them all out!”, Laqa said annoyed. “Alone because of mom he wouldn’t have! Anyway, grandpa had been old already, if not father then someone else would sooner or later have challenged him. All of them were always treated equally. Why would they be mad?”
A’viloh gave another shrug and smiled weakly. “Maybe it’s none of that and she really just is a little in love with you… I can’t blame her…”
Laqa lightly glared at him, as if he wanted to say “this isn’t funny”, but couldn’t help to grin himself.
“It’s still absurd!”, he said while shaking his head.
“You think?”, A‘viloh asked and chuckled. “I wouldn’t be surprised if half the village was secretly in love with you.”
Laqa made a sound somewhere between an annoyed huff and a suppressed laugh. Then he stretched out a hand for A‘viloh to take. As A‘viloh did so Laqa pulled him closer and wrapped his arms around him. “Too bad for them that the only one I will ever love is you.”
All too willingly - too carelessly! - A’viloh melted into the other Miqo’te’s embrace. Laqa saying things like this never failed to give him a warm and fuzzy feeling. Just as much as Laqa kissing him always made his heart skip a beat and his mind go silent.
Gently A‘viloh wrapped his arms around the taller Miqo’te’s neck, like an invitation to pull him even closer and deepen their kiss, when suddenly a sound appeared nearby. Their ears, currently slightly drooped, attentively shot up and both Miqo’te instinctively turned to see where the unexpected sound had come from.
Without doubt, there by one of the larger rocks nearby, eyes wide and mouth agape in disbelief, stood a Miqo’te girl with dark hair and bright blue eyes.
Khaya!
This was the exact moment A‘viloh knew he was in trouble.
“Khaya…”, Laqa was the first one to find his voice again. He sounded almost as if he wanted to reassure a shy animal, but it only made the girl unfreeze, whirl around and run away. “No! Khaya, wait!”, Laqa called and ran after her. He probably wanted to explain, wanted to beg her to stay silent, but A‘viloh knew it was too late already.
With his heart hammering against his chest and his thoughts racing he stood there and just watched them go. For a second he wondered what he should do now. But he had nowhere else to go, probably no one else who would defend him apart from Laqa. So slowly he followed back to the settlement, wishing he could just vanish into thin air.
***
“Tell me this isn’t the thruth.”, U‘odh demanded from his son. His voice was still relatively calm but there already was a tone in it, a kind of threatening sound that also reflected on his face.
For a moment the thought crossed A’viloh’s mind, that Laqa could simply have lied. That he simply could have denied everything. Maybe, just maybe, his father would have believed him.
But that wasn’t like Laqa.
“It’s true!”, Laqa admitted and turned his face a little bit to look at A‘viloh, who so far had stood a few steps behind him, trying to stay out of U’odh’s attention. “A‘vi and I are a couple.”
A murmur went through the crowd and somehow even A‘viloh felt surprised to hear him say this so bluntly for everyone to hear. U‘odh laughed, but it lacked any humor. A’viloh already looked very uncomfortable but when the nunh’s sharp eyes landed on him, he almost flinched away and cast his eyes down to the ground.
“That weak little welp?!”, U’odh spat out, speaking to his son but still looking and pointing at A’viloh. “What do you want with him?! He’s good for nothing!”
A’viloh had never quite understood this either. There were so many better people than him and still Laqa had chosen him instead. Carefully A‘viloh glimpsed up at Laqa and could see his whole body tense up against the nunh’s insulting words. Stubbornly Laqa stared into his father’s eyes and growled.
“Don’t you dare to speak of him like that! I don’t care if he can fight or not, he is kind and wonderful and I love him!”
But U‘odh simply shook his head and laughed condescendingly.
“Love?! Don’t be foolish now… you know nothing about love.”
That had been too much for Laqa.
Usually no one dared to speak up against U‘odh no matter how harsh his words sometimes were. But Laqa, in a way just like his father and in another just like his mother, never had known how to back down. The anger about the situation and also about his father didn’t help, so his next words sounded especially blunt and sharp, more so than he probably truly thought.
“More than you! You wouldn’t recognise love if it stood right in front of you! Because you are just a bitter resentful man who doesn’t know how to love!”
Shocked gasps sounded from the crowd and everybody stared at either Laqa or his father, waiting for a reaction. For a few long seconds both remained silent. But while Laqa just stared at the older Miqo’te with a stubborn, unyielding face, the nunh‘s face changed slowly but entirely. All the mockery faded from his face and instead his expression turned to an angry snarl.
A‘viloh knew he would only end up in the crossfire but if he didn’t do something now, they would certainly fight and that was the last thing any of them could want. He didn’t really know what to say but scraped up all his bravery and stepped forward a bit. Trying to divert their attention from each other he spoke up, still quiet but clearly audible against this deadly silence.
“Please stop, I don’t —“
But U’odh wasn’t going to listen to whatever he had to say. Furiously he whirled towards him and stepped closer with wild rage in his eyes.
“No one allowed YOU to speak, you pathetic little weakling! Get out of my sight, you are none of my kin and I never want to see your whiny face again! You are nothing but a parasite and I have suffered your presence here for long enough! Begone! You are no longer welcome here!”
Of course. A‘viloh had expected this but it still hurt to hear these words out loud. He tried not to cry but already looked quite miserable already, even without tears. U’odh however wasn’t done with him yet.
“Oh, how I regret the day I allowed you to stay here! I wish you had just died with the rest of your miserable family!”, the nunh hissed and looked as if he was about to attack A‘viloh with more than just hurtful words.
With tears in his eyes A‘viloh shivered in fear and flinched away. He had never seen U’odh so furious before. But before the man could loose his self-control entirely and really tried to strike at him, Laqa stepped between them and protectively wrapped his arms around A‘viloh.
Instantly everything went silent again. Everyone seemed shocked by what had happened or what U’odh had just said. Even the nunh himself seemed stunned when he saw his son’s disgusted face, staring at him. But U‘odh was not the kind of man to give in or admit his failures. Instead he quietly but sharply said, “Don’t look at me so. My word is final. He is none of our family and I want him gone by tomorrow.”
With a strange mixture of defiance and sadness Laqa looked at his father for a moment, before he spoke.
“In that case I don’t consider you my family any longer either. A place where A‘vi isn’t welcome I cannot call my home. If you send him away, I will go with him!”
Briefly a shadow crossed his face but then U’odh looked entirely unfazed again.
“Where would you even go?”, he asked and shook his head dismissively.
“Anywhere but here...”, Laqa replied coldly and turned to A’viloh. “Let’s go and pack our things.”
All of this had happened so suddenly A’viloh still could not quite believe it. No matter what U’odh had said, for him this place was still his home and the people here the closest thing he had to a family. He didn’t want to leave.
“What? Now?”, he asked and pleadingly looked to Laqa, hoping that there was some way to make everything right after all.
“Yes! I’m sure we can stay with the Flames for one night and tomorrow morning we leave.”
His decision seemed to be final, just as U’odh’s. What was A’viloh supposed to do against that?
Laqa made a point of taking A‘viloh’s hand so everyone could see it and knew to whom his loyalty belonged. Slowly he let his gaze wander over the crowd of curious faces giving them one last chance to speak up but they all remained silent.
With a last disappointed look at his father he turned around and walked away, unconcerned that they all stared at them as they left.
#ffxiv#ff14#final fantasy xiv#final fantasy 14#ffxiv writing#ffxiv screenshots#ff14 screenshots#ffxiv gpose#gpose#Aviloh Tia#Laqa Tia#I'm sorry for writing Avi in distress again...#but I was thinking about writing this for so long now it was only a matter of when instead of if#Besides now me not using the U for Laqa's name tag maybe makes some more sense XD#btw the title is a line of lyrics#I wonder if anyone recognizes it...#probably not though...#Its from a song called Family by Badflower#It may not fit perfectly... maybe its more of a Laqa song... but I think it has good bits for each of their feelings probably...#besides am I the only person wondering if Miqo’te have a rather Targaryen approach to relationships?#once again I feel like I have to say a few defending words about U’odh xD#First it wasn’t the fact of A‘vi being a guy that annoyed him - I think that’s pretty much not an issue in this world#Just the fact that Miqo’te culture seems very survival of the fittest to me#and A‘vi while helping with whatever work there is in the village is just not particularly strong or anything#also I think U‘odh honestly loves all of his children just can’t show it very well due to this whole you have to look strong mentality xD#I also think he at least really loved Laqa’s mother after all I imagine he challenged her father just so he was allowed to be with her…#Tbh I build so much background lore about this whole family in my head it’s absolutely ridiculous xD#Maybe an issue for him not approving Laqa being in love with someone as weak as A’viloh is also Laqa’s mother#I imagine she was a good hunter but also didn’t have a good health and died of some sickness resulting from that which broke his heart#enough rambling of lore I should put into text instead of here 🙈
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monards · 5 months ago
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everytime i find out someone has assumed i had a crush on them because i treat them with (normal) platonic affection i die a little inside. i fear people have unnormalized just being decent and kind a little *too* much
#it is a tiny bit worse when they take things i did to be nice or make them feel better in that way. please!!#i just want!! to make you feel a bit better about yourself !!!! not that !!!! stop !!!! no!!!!!!!!!!! shoo !!! away !!!!!!!!!!!#-> in people's defense. i dont really have those same shames when it comes to assuring your friends or family you love them.#so that probably makes things feel different.#which i still think is odd!!! love is universal!!!!#-> also. most romantic songs ive listened to dont end up interpreted romantically in my little head LMFAHFSHOO#so that could also be it#(crepe chronic addiction to telling people songs remind her of them backfires on her)#;; sorry guys! i have a joyfriend that i love more than the world! please have those thoughts go away! pretty please! ew !#LMADSGHDOASO#-> ALSO !!!!!!!! this was not meant negatively!!!!!!!!!!!! it just makes me uncomfortable when people assume. its not their fault entirely#just feels abit icky. and odd. for people to have assumptions like that without any basis#i have been in love a total of two times in my life. ido not think im the slightest bit in *LOVE* you when i speak to you twice a week#-> slightly offtopic im glad i dont have to worrya bout confessions anymore with the fact i make my sexuality & status fairly clear#id kill myself if another man talked to me like that#i have an extreme curse.#and making sure i have the lesbian flag on any of my belongings has largely saved me#(for the most part)#crepe rambles#((none of this applies to mylovely joyfriend. i loveyou very much and your interpretations are always perfect. hi#you can assume all you want because you know me and are not weird in any capacity about me. 💜 muchappprecation
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wayfinderships · 4 months ago
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I love you F.inal F.antasy 8 Panchi <3 I love you a lot
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scattered-winter · 4 months ago
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every day i kick a rock and bash my head into the wall because i'll never get to go on a big space adventure and become tightly close-knit with my new found family up there <//3
#re lrb..........#i mean realistically if i was in the voltron/quintenary stars universe chances are i would probably NOT be one of the people#going on the space adventure.#i'd be roped into the plot when the aliens invade and earth almost gets destroyed. spoilers for arc 2 btw sorry#but man. child soldierism aside i wish that were me so so so bad#sadly kicks a rock when will EYE have a deep and mystical connection with a giant ancient cat :(#its not even that i want to interact with the main cast bc i dont really i just. wanna be in their position man#i think one of the reasons why voltron grabbed me so hard (among MANY) is how badly i wanted to do what the main characters did#i remember when i was first watching it while it was coming out i would CONSISTENTLY daydream about being launched into space#with a handful of other people and having to fight a war and grow up far away from home and all the suffocating stuff that came with it#and then coming back years later already solidly knowing who i am and being confident in that#so i'd actually be brave enough to be unapologetic about it. and i'd be found family with the people i went to space with also#that parts important#idk man just. i dont like saying i was abused when i was younger because i really dont think it was like that and it isnt even close to#what how people who have really been abused have had to go through#but sometimes i really do wonder. like now that im (mostly) out and able to review everything with an outside perspective#not even getting into the cult survivorism stuff this is JUST family dynamics im talking about here#bc that shit is a whole other can of worms#i think my parents were genuinely doing the best they could with the cards they were dealt but. jesus christ.#i would have given ANYTHING to be able to run away from all that. and throw magic cats into the equation? brother im GONE#anyway this tags ramble has derailed in a MAJOR way. tldr i wanted to be a paladin sooooo fuckign bad bro#like it actually makes me SICK how much i want a lion. red you are my forever girl even if only in my heart <///3#i still do want to do all that out of principle but its not as desperate now i just really love space and really want a big kitty friend#winter speaks
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ashironie · 4 months ago
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i was on youtube checking my notifications and i saw on my subscriptions feed that mumbo had the little red dot so i gasped very loudly and very excited, because that meant mumbo posted and i just hadn’t noticed, since i always find out mumbo posted by my subscriptions feed
last video i found out via notification.
the subscriptions feed only updates when you look at it, not when you have looked at the video in question.
the disappointment was immense.
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