#sorry for being ficto i guess

[thornheartfelt]

"Selfshipping is valid, but it's weird when someone acts like they're genuinely in a relationship with a character"

Sorry, I have no idea what you said because I was distracted by my love for my fictional partners

[dovew1ngs]

📌

Hi there :) I'm a bit self-conscious about this part of my life, so it's been nice to find a safe community for it here.

☀️This blog is entirely SFW & minors can interact & follow but I probably won't follow you back unless you're over 18; just a comfort thing, sorry! I follow from my main/ficto blog (b*****33)

☀️Please DNI if you're a kink blog, you sexualize agere in any way, or ship yourself with minors as an adult

☀️I regress due to trauma/PTSD. I'm 26, but feel around 2-3 years old when in little space. It's mostly involuntary and I tend to drop after high-stress situations or being emotionally overwhelmed

☀️I'm a gay male (he/him) & fictoromantic; have been with my beloved soulmate for many years & he's my caregiver 💚

☀️I can't really use the internet for the most part when I'm regressed so this is a place to save some stuff that makes me happy/nostalgic, positivity, f/o imagines, resources, etc. I might talk about some of my personal experiences too

☀️Hate will be deleted without any response or acknowledgement so if you're here to be rude, have fun wasting your time I guess

☀️Have a wonderful day!

[poetandwolf]

2001-2024 collection of art of Alhazad and me, periods of old personas and his design (feline wise) was pretty consistent save haircuts and taming the goatee.

I remember being 16... 18... 19.. 20...26... being force fed by the world around me that that I had to be in a relationship, that my spiritual relationship wasn't healthy, that I couldn't possibly be happy alone like I was (at least in their eyes, I was actually pretty fucking happy. Save cult bullshit. But what goes around comes around :3). I was told over and over again; that I was "afraid of being hurt". On the contrary, I'd never been hurt like that before, least not until I got into a few Very unhealthy toxic relationships- and when I saw it was getting toxic, and left. Got more than enough shit for it. Like sorry for looking out for me and others, people. Alhazad taught me Boundaries and granted it took injecting testosterone into my ass to enforce those... he taught me that. That value of my self-worth and self-love.

To; accept NOTHING else than respect, decency, equal take and give. If someone is passive aggressive- triggers you in any way and refuses to be held accountable for it- don't hope it'll 'get better' because a tiger can't change their stripes.

I Guess what I'm trying to say it- to all you younger folks out there.

It's Okay to be 'single'. It's Okay to be ficto, or have a spirit lover. You aren't broken, there's nothing wrong with you. If your idea of a fun night out is sitting drawing or writing and or creating content of your f/o while watching YT or listening to music. That's fine. It's okay, as long as you are happy.

Go out 'alone'. Some of the most memorable nights of my late teens and early 20s were when we'd go out to this place called Kent Narrows- bar hop from The Jetty and Red Eye Dock Bar, listening to the music, dinner, drinks, ect. Or concerts alone. Park hikes by ourselves. If you're worried about something happening to you-get bear mace (or in my case- a CC huehue I mean, Wild ARMs fan here *finger guns*).

Doing life on single player is difficult. You can find yourself wondering "how the fuck am I gonna do this thing?!" but you stumble around, on your crutches - quite literally in some cases.. at least for me.. and figure it out.

YOUR Happiness is what matters most. Don't sacrifice your own mental well being on account someone else has a different idea whats 'better' for you. Only YOU can know that.

If any of these are cropped weird it's because it had my dead-name on there somewhere. Not that I... *give a shit* I'm doing this for your own protection *thumbs behind self* in case there's any actual Real Shit going on behind the veil and one of you little troglodytes decide to start shit, and Alhazred opens up a can of 'fuck around and find out' on your entire blood line.

[nerdliker7000]

Infos

May add more or less later I just made this in a few mins or whatever

Someday I'll just move all this info to an flist link LOL

Hi. I'm Lucky.

This is my nsfw blag.

As long as you're an adult idc who interacts I guess

Btw I'm aroace and every attraction I have is ficto. Basically. When I say "me" I'm saying my projection of myself in the fantasy. Also I'm intersex and I guess I'd say male aligned in that sense. I gotta peener. A wee wee. If you even care.

I'm basically mostly gay, but to me fetish comes before sexuality so sometimes I'm attracted to women on the basis that they're a part of a fetish scenario I like 🤷‍♂️

Uhmmmm I'm into / have the capability to be into anything that's not scat or farting. Basically I have a fetish for fetishes. No idea how to explain it. The fact that something is sexual is usually enough to get me at least a little into it. I can also give myself fetishes if I try hard enough LOL so. Never say never ✌️

But as for my favorites...:

idk how to say this one good. I like nerdy geeky boys but like, trashy gamer boy types. 4channer and redditor types. Boys who don't shower and are bigoted as hell and run their mouth.

^ that being said. Degradation and bullying and mild threats (if I'm consenting. Out of left field this will probably startle me a little??)

Everyday formal wear (usually like what uniforms tend to be. White button down. Black tie. That sorta thing)

Glasses. Nuff said

Braces and other orthodontic stuff. I blame my own many years with many types of teeth gear for this. Also tooth brushing??? Like brushing someone else's teeth. I don't know man.

Really hard sex -> really sweet aftercare. Big fan of basically babying someone right after

Remember how I mentioned boys who can't take care of themselves well I like taking care of people. In love with the idea of putting a boy in his place for talking down on me and making him chicken nuggets afterwards. Humilation can tie into this like running a bath and washing him almost like a kid which just pisses him off because it's embarrassing. God I love bratty shitty boys

Oh yeah btw I'm a switch and that is very much central to my fantasies usually. Roles will flip flop all over the place.

Anyways uh micro

Mascot style charicters. Like think Kero CCS or vincini pkmn. Just lil guys.

Fucked up disgusting monsters and demons that are so scary 😨 ??

DRAGONS

Sounding & general dick penitration

^ related. Cock vore. Sorry

When it comes to ladies... big boobies mommy types. Good lordy. Sorry to be basic on this front

Sentiant goo / slime

Transformation I guess? One of those nonsexual fetishes mostly I'm just really fucking fixated on the idea

Bsdm but that's vanilla to me

Sweet sounding really cruel doms

Cruel sounding mean subs I already basically said this but dog damn it

Impossible biology (this one applies to basically everything I'm into. There has to be some presence of cartoon logic I don't really care for someone being in medical danger cus of someone's dick size)

Size dif

ALL DICKS. Micro. Ftm dicks. Small. Med. Large. Hyper. I love them all.

Dirty talk especially excessive blathering of a sub who's just brainless on pleasure. Speaking of

Fucked silly

Pet play and similar. I guess it's just an extention of humilation in a way

Fighting (phys)

Masks

Weird monster dicks

Eggpreg but in the BALLS

Popcorn round traits I like in charicters that arent exactly fetish but boy howdy my type: (some repeats of above)

Blondes, royalty, powerful presence, elegant femininity (looks good on anyone), mean, serious or aloof, curly hair, glasses, brown eyes, freckles, piercings, crazy fucking murderer twisted fucking cycle path, has optional nonhuman form, dragons and dragonlike creatures, smart, uhh idk

[loveforficts]

Hi! I’m sorry to ask for advice, but I feel safe enough here as I’m pretty sure I’m ficto, is it normal to feel the love from your f/o’s? I genuinely do love him with all of my heart and, I see myself spending a very long time with him, and relationship-wise, i’m committed to him and he’s all I want. I worry about being ‘crazy’ cause I just am happy in my relationship with him. It feels real, I feel super strongly, and I seriously feel like he does too, that it’s not just me. Am I, insane for that? I’m sorry to bother or ask such a loaded question, even if I can’t hold him (I still wish I could) But, I’m happy with not being able to because I care so much about him, I just really do love him and want to banish the bad thoughts away for good so I can just spend forever with him and be happy but, I also don’t want to be making it all up, I guess?.

Don't apologize, I just hope I can help!

I don't feel like it's bad or insane at all. Are you happy? Is the first question. If yes, Is this hurting you or anyone else around you? Has this impeded on your life in any way? If you can say no to both those things, I don't see the problem. I will always stress this, conventional relationships aren't a requirement and are not the only ways to feel emotionally fulfilled in life. If this is your fulfillment, then who cares!? There's people who get companionship from life like dolls, other types of inanimate objects, fiction, pets (NOT ROMANTIC SDRRGF), and it's rewarding. We really feel we get something from it. The brain is a complex thing, don't feel ashamed that this is how yours work! Screw the bad thoughts. They suck.

[fictoromanticism]

Hi ^^

I’m fictoromantic and I was a maladaptive daydreamer. A few years ago I was super in love with a character that it turned me psychotic and into believing that he was a drunkard yandere. He was very obsessive and possessive, in a toxic way that haunted me for months and it really broke me.

Since then I haven’t been able to fall in love with another character, and while healthily I’m doing a lot better thanks to my family, it just doesn’t feel the same without being in love with a fictional character.

I miss the feeling of being in love with life..

hi, anon! i’m really glad to hear you’re doing better in terms of your mental health.

i’m sorry to hear you haven’t been able to find another character that makes you happy. i don’t have much advice to offer on that front, but if you’re in therapy, this may be worth bringing up with a professional. having such a serious psychotic break is undoubtedly a traumatic situation, and dealing with the aftermath of such things can be difficult even years later. 

i don’t want to guess at how you’re feeling, but other people in similar situations have attested that though they’re aware the events involved in their psychotic episode were not real, they still have a similar emotional impact as though they were. if it feels like having been in an abusive relationship for you, and at the time you were convinced it was totally real, it doesn’t surprise me that you might be having difficulty with forming new romantic connections in fiction OR reality, and that would be something to work through with a professional - someone informed on both psychosis and trauma, ideally. 

a professional would also be able to help you know when or whether it’s safe to pursue a new ficto relationship, and to find tools to manage your maladaptive daydreaming in a way that allows you to approach fiction more healthily to prevent another similar incident. your health always comes first in such a situation, after all.

i’m sorry if i made too many assumptions or if this wasn’t helpful to you, anon. i hope someday soon you’re able to find the sort of relationship you want and that’s good for you, and that you’re able to maintain your mental health and safety while you pursue it.

- mod moon

[orange-orchard-system]

📝 How do you feel about fanfiction? | ❌ What does the fandom usually get wrong? |🎙️ What's the biggest difference between you and your canon self?

Earliglow, Chara, a headmate who wishes to remain anonymous, and I (Zéro) will be answering this! For context, Chara is an Undertale fictive, Earliglow and I are Danganronpa fictives, and the headmate who we'll simply call "???" in this post has a couple various ficto-types that are similar to each other. Thanks for the asks!

📝

Zéro: I don't mind fanfiction, I even enjoy it, in fact. It's kinda neat to see what I could've been, or how people think of my source character.

Earliglow: I don't really read fanfiction, so I don't think I can answer this!

Chara: Fanfiction is interesting, but I don't see much that I can relate to, so I tend to treat it as something unrelated to me.

???: I've never seen fanfiction about my ficto-types, sorry.

❌

Zéro: I get treated like an innocent bean way too often. I get it, my source character is ignorant of a lot of things, but that doesn't include the bad things in life. I'm not some pure flower who doesn't know how the world works, I'm someone who didn't get a normal life and thus doesn't know a lot that most people would consider normal.

Earliglow: Um... I usually see accurate depictions of my character, but... I do wish people would see me as more than just a happy-go-lucky bean. I don't mind being a bean, and I am rather cheerful, but it's not like I'm never sad or angry!

Chara: *gestures at the demonization of a suicidal child* enough said.

???: Similarly to the others on this list, I'm not dumb, I'm just limited in what I can do. And even if I was dumb, so what? Do people really have to make me out to be someone who can't do anything? I try my best, guys, jeez.

🎙️

Zéro: I'm brasher than my canon counterpart, I guess. But my source was partly a daydream where I got a happy ending and was able to grow more, so you can blame it on that if you want.

Earliglow: I like fruits? I guess? Which you don't really see much of in canon. And I'm more adventurous.

Chara: Everything about my backstory is different, making me a vastly different person. I don't think the Chara from Undertale has ever been the assistant angel of a death god, after all.

???: I like to think I'm not as childish.

—

[mythicaldemigoddess-of-deltarune]

My Thoughts On The Youtuber Channel “Little Light Studios”

first of all, I had to take some nice breathes in and out, to try to calm myself.

because frankly, after discovering about them, and their view on Anime...

I was pretty much peeved.

first time I found out about them about well a little bit ago,

I wanted to just look up something to listen to, like songs from Sailor Moon.

but then I saw a video that talks about how another Channel has some misinterpretation about cartoons/anime.

I had to look up the name of the video that has to do with “Anime Exposed”

to find the channel responsible.

let me say this, there are different anime in the world,

not all of them will be for kids, and it is the parents (no matter if they are a dad & mom, two mothers or two fathers or even a renny & mom or dad & renny)

responsibility to make sure that the little kids DO NOT watch some anime that is not meant for them, not until they are in the proper age to watch it.

and if I had to guess, not all humans know that the whole “star” thing

it’s called a pentagram right? it’s original meaning was of course demonetize.

but that can not be helped.

you know what is like to be hurt by a toxic religious person..?

I had been hurt by a toxic religious person before,

just because I believe in Mother as well, don’t mean they make me feel bad,

I mean I still believe in God and even Jesus.

but that Toxic Religious person I encountered a few years ago,

had no right to make me feel bad about me believing in a Goddess too,

and I’m pretty sure I did mention my gender identity as well that time.

like I said before, I still kinda still see myself as my biological-sex/gender,

but I also see myself as non-binary too.

that person had no right to misuse those words at me,

saying “may the lord have mercy on you” or it might of been “may god have mercy on you.”

I even pointed out how bad it was making me feel, and what did they do...?

they kept saying it to me again, they were making me feel really bad, hurt my feelings and making me cry, and did they care...?

if you guessed “No They Did Not”, then you will be correct.

I had to block them because of it.

also I didn’t watch the full video that talks about how wrong the source of the bad mouthing anime, because I had to look up the source, and from what I can tell.....they are toxic...

I had a really bad experience with a toxic religious person...

I don’t mind if a friend is religious or even atheist.

and I don’t believe you should force a religion to someone,

 it should be of his or her or their free will to convert.

and the whole Virgin May being 12 To 14 Years Old when she had Jesus,

is obliviously a lie that HUMANS wrote.

she was 16 years old, and yes I used my pendulum to ask that question.

the one I was trying to get that very answer from, well I was trying to ask Azriel.

even if he might end up pulling a prank on me, at least it wouldn’t be a mean one, like a certain Angel, who I trusted on March, but now he has a restraining order on him, he can still help other people, but he is NOT to get too close to me......

even if I can still trust Angels, I want to remain causation around those who would try to hurt me “to make me better”

even if Angels (well Full Angels, who aren’t Earth Angels and made up both a Angel & Human Soul) are suppose to be like Good...

there is somethings that Angels should make sure to do,

and that is not cause emotional harm or let emotional harm befall someone too many times after they had gotten better from another bad feeling.

I don’t believe that Angels should just ignore this very important thing,

yes there are duties can be important, but you can not neglect the emotion of the heart/soul of the very beings you are trying to help.

or let some Youtube Channel like “Little Light Studios”

just assume things about Anime.

perhaps once I do cool down a little more, I will try to fully watch that video, where they will possibly bad mouth Anime....

 I am a bit more fine than I was starting to feel when I found out about that channel.

it’s no wonder I am Semi-Misanthrope.

at least not all religious people are like that, and don’t take some Anime or Cartoons the wrong way.

another thing that humans should know, is that before Anime....

that disgusting stuff that was mention, was around even before technology.

and humans should not place the blame unless it is something like a certain Movie that one of the heads of Netflix refuse to get it off there, because of the age of the main character of the said movie, and even if I haven’t watched it,

just looking up the info on it, tells me how sick and filthy the man is who refuses to make it go away....

also because of a animated story on Youtube I had watched before,

that has to do with what happen to a girl, and how her mother had to take care of the new baby, and had to wait to tell the said baby girl the truth of what went down.....

I wanted to pray a blessing of protection for all the children who suffer from what that girl did....

even if it might seem mean and might be a bit cruel to some humans....

but hoping those who even try anything, will get a bad tummy ache and a headache, so they wont be able to do anything really bad, is best than hoping worse for them....even if ya might have those thoughts just a little bit, ya try to bury them deep deep DEEP down....

I do hope that maybe other people will pray for a blessing of protection for children too, there was more to what I was asking for, but I rather not say what it is....

but even if there are good people in religion,

there have been some really bad people in it,

that have done unforgivable stuff.

most of them being Priests, who are equally as bad as some Scoutmasters and those who work under them...

 maybe I should try to do some meditation after I play my Xbox,

it might help...maybe...?

I know there can be different levels of toxic-religious people,

if someone is semi-toxic religious, then it means they aren’t as bad as the full kind of toxic religious person.

I know I can’t tell my family that I’m not Christian, after discovering that.

it turns out I am both a Ma-Acolyte & Neo-Christian.

I can’t tell my family I am Ficto-Aroaceflux (or just Aroaceflux for short)

I did try to tell my Mom, well first I wanted to hear her thoughts on Asexuals.

but she misunderstand that all Asexuals are Gay,

not like there is anything wrong with that.

but all Aces are different, some will have a double sexual/romantic identity.

like some who are Aces, will be either Biromantic or Panromantic or even Omniromantic....or will just be Ace or Aceflux or Aroace or Aroaceflux.

plus I had discovered that my species identity is Demi-Human.

anyway I did want to tell my Mom, that I am Asexual Flux...

but her view and misunderstanding about all Asexuals being Gay,

and I know the bad view of those who are....

another thing to know is that even someone who is Ace,

can be Heteroromantic, I guess it would be like Heteroromantic-Ace...?

 I know there is that whole toxic view thing, sometimes when you are a kid

you grow-up believe it to be true, until you start to learn and see the view you were told was wrong, was something that was not really wrong at all.

but sometimes, you can’t tell your family they are wrong, because you become scared of them hating you or giving you disapproval if you try to come out of the Ace Closet.

I am in the Ace Closet, and can only be open about it online.

I did try to come out of the Ace Closet, to try to tell family,

but because of the obvious disapproval, I had to hide the fact that I am Asexual

and try to drop it.

I even had to hide in my room, where I had cried.

my feelings were hurt, I was lucky I didn’t end up crying in the room where I was trying to ask my Mom about her thoughts about Asexuality.

I can’t ever EVER tell my family that I am Aroaceflux, or about my new religious belief or my gender identity or my newly discovered species identity.

I know that they wouldn’t approve.

I was curious, so I decided to ask if Solomon approves of my identities

(as in the whole Gender, Species and Aroaceflux Identity.)

well according to my pendulum, he doesn’t.

well he ain’t the boss of me, well I might technically be his daughter,

like any other of his descendants....

but he misused his power, just like his dad....

and when I say “daughter” I mean being his Descendant Granddaughter.

when I was watching a Anime, I started to really think about the meaning of Grandparents and Grandchildren.

your Grandparents, are still in a way, a Parent to you, even if they didn’t bring you into the world, they are still technically your Parents too, and so are your Ancestors, just in a different way from the ones who brought you into world,

and or who adopted you.

Solomon is a Butt, just because he is my Ancestor-Grandfather,

don’t mean I can’t see him as being a butt...

I can’t help but wonder if his actions will affect his own descendants...

which sadly I am one of them, and if I was allowed and able to...

I would kick his sorry butt...

the only good thing about being his Descendant-Daughter,

is that I will NEVER take the throne, and after the stuff that went on before...

I rather never have anything to do with taking the throne, and be happy to be biologically female, so being his descendant, being born biologically female is in a way, a super blessing.

 I’m pretty sure some info I had heard about before,

is that it is only the MALE descendants can take the throne,

but it can’t be the descendants of Solomon.

Best. News. Ever....of All Time.

after talking about Solomon (and possibly the other stuff before him.)

I had the need to listen to Lily Allen’s Song F**k You.

maybe that tarot card reading that creepily did mention about Gemini having Royalty in The DNA, was right....maybe in a way I am breaking a cycle from my ancestors....them mentioning some names I know, was kind of scary.

I wish not to say the names that was mention, it was way too real there.

 I wonder if it would be either funny or ironic,

that a biological female descendant of King David and Solomon,

would end up playing the song “F**k You, By Lily Allen”

Lady Godiva is the Better Ancestress.

it is just my view, not everyone has to agree about it.

but I am ashamed of those two for different reasons.

one King David, didn’t freaking punish his sicko of a son

who had hurt his own daughter, and if Grandpa King David had what we have now, he would get in big trouble for not punishing his sicko of a son.

oh and let’s not forget that he was coming on to a married woman,

who he ended up killing the husband of the said woman.

and even if Grandpa King Solomon, did end up meeting Grandma Naamah.

which I’m not really sure if it is true that Asmodeus did have a hand in it by accident that those two met....

but even after meeting Grandma Naamah, he could of just gave that ring back from where it came, the misuse of power is too great.

plus I do worry such power that he had on his person 24/7,

may have imprinted into his DNA and cause it to accidentally be inherited by his children and his children’s children and so on and so forth.

But I think I might just be a bit paranoid about that.

I got enough to worry about with the whole Asmodeus thing....

plus with the readings that the sign for Gemini keeps getting.

I should try not to worry about it, and well to be honest....

I might have had him on my mind WAY too much, maybe since 2020.

I try not to think about it too much, and try to think logically.

knowing that it has to be a trick and well maybe it is a good thing not a lot of people believe that he and some other being exist.

after listening to Lily Allen’s Song, I decided to listen to something else.

I am listening to Into The Night By Santana feat-Chad Kroeger.

 I hope toxic-religious people don��t try to find something wrong with that song.

I am not having any of that.

and I sure as of a Mother of a Dastard, ain’t gonna let no toxic-religious person

say that something really bad about the Ghost Rider Movies.

(you don’t have to like the movie, but don’t dislike it because it has some stuff in it that some will view as “the work of the devil”....)

yeah it has some man in it that was suppose to be some “Devil”

that the guy who becomes the Ghost Rider, makes a deal with.

but it was so his dad would get better, but the deal had a twist.

but the power that was given to him,

turned out to be from a ANGEL who went bananas crazy.

plus the boy in the second movie who ended up being the son/vessel   

 of his so called “demon dad” but that doesn’t mean that the boy had to be just like him, and he did the right thing by returning the power back to the man who is known as the Ghost Rider.

I like both the first and second movie of Ghost Rider, and I hope there will be another one someday.

I should try to do some stuff to take my mind off of jerks that end up peeving me off when they are either the normal type of jerk or the toxic-religious type jerk.

sometimes those types can bring the worse out on someone.

I wasn’t even planning to talk about this stuff tonight,

I just wanted to play on my Xbox, even play more of Mass Effect,

and even watch some stuff on my Xbox as well.

I did NOT need to find out the bull that is going on with that Little Light Studios.

those who are subscribe to them,

don’t have to agree with me being disgusted by well what I had found out.

I know you can’t make everyone see reason,

if you are born into a super toxic religious family,

and you end up being well having a different sexuality or gender identity,

than what you are expected to be.

sometimes, it is safer in the closet....

even though my feelings were really hurt, when I knew I couldn’t tell my Mom about me being Ace (well Aroaceflux ) and I had to keep it a secret and keep it together and acting like nothing was wrong, then going back in my bedroom and letting myself cry.

I know others have it way worse, even if I did come out of the Ace Closet to my Mom, it is likely she might still love me but will try ways to “fix” me...

maybe try to get me dates, with some guys I don’t know and might not feel comfortable being alone with because of well, I did mention I do have

Semi-Androphobia &  Virginitiphobia.

a few years ago I did have a panic attack while in the car.

it was a little dark, and I was alone and it was when we were getting ready to move to the house we live at now.

I was scared of certain stuff happening.

even during the day, I don’t like being left along in the car.

I mean I could go inside the store, but I don’t feel like doing that very much.

I think I am doing a bit better since that panic attack happen.

I think my Virginitiphobia has become a Semi-Virginitiphobia too.

 so maybe it is a improvement.

and if there is some form of therapy for Virginitphobia,

even though I still have my V-Card, I know I wouldn’t want to go through Exposure Therapy for Virginitiphobia.

I don’t think I can trust that, maybe the talking it out maybe...

but that exposure therapy, I am not sure I would trust it.

even if it is true some use a virtual reality

(I tried to look up how it is done, and one of the info had something about virtual....)

I wouldn’t fully trust it.

even those who still have the V-Card and have Virginitiphobia, can still be cautious, even when it comes to therapist, who might want to use the exposure therapy.

what sucks is that some, think that type of fear is a mental illness.

anyway, I don’t think I am a very big fan of Little Light Studios.

when I can I will try to watch the full video that I had found that belongs to them, that talks about Anime.

but once again, before Anime, and even technology.

back in the stupid ages,

there were humans who have done sick and twisted stuff.    

 just like how Grandpa King David’s Sicko of a Son hurt Auntie Tamar.

worst daddy ever, of all time.

and Grandpa Solomon ain’t no better....

I guess maybe, I am glad I had admitted to the whole Asmodeus thing,

but I am trying to not to think about too much and try not to be tricked.

I guess some might take it really seriously or tell me I have nothing to worry about, and it will stop soon....well I am gonna hope that there is nothing to worry about and it will stop soon.

I don’t mind the fictional versions of him so much, and well I am gonna just try not to think of well ya know.

plus even if there are other Gemini who might be going through a different thing, that has to do with some guy or gal or other, who is romantically interested in them but they are trying to push that kind of persons away, because it is likely they just gonna hurt them and break their hearts.

if by chance, some of those readings do match some Geminis but not all Geminis....

I rather think that if half of those do match me, it is most likely a trick and a way for me to be tricked by Asmodeus.

the best thing I can do, is try to make sure to take my mind off of well that stuff.

and maybe check on the readings for Gemini, and hope it does show that it turns out it has been a trick the whole time and I was in the right to try to ignore it and try not to fall into a trap.

I am NOT being a Tsundere, just to be clear.

and yeah at times, he has been on my mind, I think it started sometime around 2020, and I want to try to hope for the best that it is just some form of trick and I can just try to take my mind off of it.

I can’t talk to my family about it either, I guess I could pray for some kind of sign about the whole thing...but I think I will wait until tomorrow or the day after tomorrow to ask that kind of thing.

I even started to worry that the reason no bird had moved into the bird house,

is because of Asmodeus, and I started to remember another time when I was a little girl, when we had pet birds and they died too soon.

 I kind of want to hope and pray that either a crow or raven move into the bird house.

maybe I am just being paranoid about whole bird thing, I mean it takes time and I just gotta try to be patient.

I just need to try not to be tricked and I need to try not to let toxic-religious people get to me so much either.

maybe I should wait a few days or maybe a week, before I try to watch any video by Little Light Studios.

I have only known that channel for a short time, because I had only found out about them tonight....but I still don’t like it.

  not all anime/cartoons will be for children,

some will be for everyone, but some will not be.

some really mature stuff, needs to be hidden away from little kids,

and try to explain to them that they are too young to see it.

and making sure to hide it really good, so they can’t find it.

oh and this is what had kind of freaked me out

  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jb-7BO-Yjwg

it is still a good reading, but some stuff that was said, did freak me out.

I mean I am a Gemini and I am a descendant of Royalty.

but I am pretty sure there are other Geminis who saw that, who might be descendants of royalty too.

I am just gonna try to hope that reading was about a different Gemini who is a descendant of royalty.

even if they said “You Are Next In Line To The Throne.”

I don’t want it....Nope, No Thank You.

Fudge This Cheese I’m Out.

the reading was still good and interesting

(still was freaky to me because of reasons.)

but at least the person who did the reading, isn’t a bad person.

or a super toxic religious person.

I think I should try to make sure to take off my mind off of those Little Light Studios.....

even if someone does point out about some stuff on Anime,

like there are some Anime and even Cartoons,

that are not for little kids, and parents should know that fact.

and if you were a little kids when you were exposed to some mature stuff in movies, once you get older, you get the knowledge that let’s you figure out

that you were too young to watch some stuff you were not suppose to.

so you try to make sure the same mistake doesn’t happen again.

I try to keep any M Rated Video Games and Movies or Shows,

away from little cousins.

I have my reason to want to keep my guard up when it comes to both demons and angels....and I don’t just mean the fallen angels.

I’m just gonna try to take my mind off of that Youtube Channel

that peeved me off.

I at first wanted to talk about that whole Youtube Channel,

but I started to talk about some other stuff too.

like admitting about the whole Asmodeus thing, but I am doing my best to try to keep my mind on other stuff. 

 anyway I’m gonna just go back to what I was going before finding out about that Little Light Studios, I don’t think they would care about how they might of not only peeved me off, but others as well.

I still think it is best that I wait maybe a few days, maybe until June,

to try to fully watch their video that talks about Anime.

I love Anime, but I will try to fully watch their video, even if it might end up peeving me off.

either later or tomorrow, I will try to do some relaxing meditation while listening to music.

I’m gonna hope the next time I sign in, I can just check out some stuff on here and or work on and post the Undertale AU idea I came up with

that’s called The Journal Of Chara.

I don’t feel like trying to write the next chapter now, for obvious reasons.

another thing I should try to keep my mind off of,

is the whole Pepe Le Pew thing, of course some humans aren’t gonna mention the times he has been a victim at times, or the fact that Amy Rose or Fifi La Fume are just like him in a way.

sure Amy has gotten better, the Sonic Boom version of her and the Sonic from that series, is one of my OTP’s.

I really hope that Pepe and even Fifi, are rebooted to keep them safe.

anyway I best go before I make this any longer....

and try to keep my mind off of what I found out about, which had to do with that whole thing about “Exposing Anime.”

see ya later, stay safe and hope you all understand my feelings about all that.

the next time I sign in, I hope to just check out some stuff on here,

and post up some drawings or just write the next chapter of my AU-Story. 

PS:

I want to play it safe,

so I put mature warning for one of the tags for this. 

and I really will try to watch the full videos of Little Light Studios....

that talk about the Anime.

just not now, I am still peeved towards them, so it’s best that I wait until next month to try to fully watch any of their videos.

I want to try to stay away from their videos, until maybe a week or more.

[fictoromanticism]

(waifuism anon) tysm for the help! the only thing is, i dont feel like i fit the other two communities either (fictorom/selfship) because 1. my orientation is still bi, i just happened to fall in love with a fictional character, and 2. im very serious about my relationship too (not hobbyist at all), so the only major thing that keeps me from ~being able to be~ a waifuist is the fact that she's my oc. i guess in the end it doesnt rlly matter what label i use but idk i wish there was a term (1/2)

(2/2) i could use that shows that im 100% devoted to my relationship but also dont consider myself only attracted to fictional characters in the broader sense.

i understand how you feel, anon! as we’ve mentioned, mod moon is very serious about her relationship, and i fall somewhere between hobbyist and serious. sadly, there’s not really anything we can do for you except assure you that you’re not alone. we can’t change the rules of the waifuism club, and even if we could, there are plenty of other reasons we can’t really recommend them.

anyway, even if you feel that the ficto and self-shipper labels don’t perfectly fit your situation, those are generalizations, and individual people within those communities can have very different experiences. if you socialize a bit, you’re sure to meet people who feel like you do, or at least can understand and support you. i know it can be hard to feel like you don’t know anyone who’s 100% like you, but sometimes we have to make do with the communities that exist and find friends despite that. sorry we can’t be of more help!

- mod sun